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Alright, time to share my opinions about Veilguard!! I have both criticism and praise so bear with me as I jump from one extreme to the other 😆 spoilers ahead of course!
The game has a very rough start with the dialogue being formulaic and rushed and the characters overexposing. It feels like a heavy handed attempt at summarizing all of previous games' lore for newcomers or in case you forgot but it's so overdone it feels coddling and trivializes a lot of previous events. Luckily this gets better once all of the introductions are out of the way, though the excessive hints and clarifications continue until the end sadly.
The locations are absolutely incredible and very diverse!! This is a highlight of the game for me. There is so much detail and care in every map and there are so many of them. My pc is struggling to reach medium settings and yet everything looks stunning. The verticality of the maps is so imposing and the graphics have a very dreamy quality that I love. I also enjoy the maze-like structure to the maps, it's more linear but makes everything look a bit more intentional. The color and light direction was amazing, all the visual development really!! it has to be one of the prettiest games I've ever played.
When I started I have to admit it did not feel like I was in Thedas and it all felt a bit theme-parky, if that makes sense. A lot of previously important and established world elements that made Thedas what it is were overlooked or made irrelevant. But the more I played the more it started to feel a bit more similar to Inquisition, for better or worse depending on what you feel about Inquisition. But!! this also feels like a selectively sanitized version of Thedas compared to previous games. In it's attempt to stay safe and uncontroversial in some aspects it loses a lot of substance and it changes the tone. The surface level politics, ignoring previously established major societal issues and a tell-don't-show approach makes the world seem more simple and shallow with no grey areas to explore. ( the humor also falls flat and out of place often too, and WHY is everyone always smirking, enough!! godlike beings are destroying the planet please this is not the time for Marvel banter aaaa )
The pacing at the start is a bit of a mess. It is so fast it felt like jumping from one world shattering discovery to the next with no time to process. The characters also seem to underreact to important information and major developments. It felt like the game was rushing me through all this to get to the part of the story it wanted to tell me while I was still wrapped in my shock blanket trying to catch my breath lmao. I really like all the key story points they touched upon, I just wish they dwelled more on them to give them more narrative weight. ( though blaming every bad thing to ever happen on the Elves was certainly..a choice )
I think the writing could have used more subtlety in the first half and more boldness in the second 😆 but I loved the thematic parallels between Rook and Solas and how every quest informs the main storyline. I do wish Rook was given more impossible choices and put in more difficult situations that forced them to lie or betray their own to better drive the point home though ( listen I just love a Trolley problem!! we need more of those, I'm the Trolley problem's number one fan!! ) I feel like they missed the chance to put Rook in Solas' role and be as vilified and hated for it as Solas was despite their best intentions which would make Rook's regrets stronger and in turn make their escape from the fade all the more impressive and give them a better understanding of Solas to either use against him or earn his respect. The line 'they called me the Dread Wolf, what will they call you when this is over' from the trailers was so good I was waiting for this!! But everyone just loves Rook no matter what!!
But I feel like I stated too many negative aspects in a row so moving on to some things I enjoyed!
The characters were very lovable to me. The romances weren't as long or impactful as I would have liked but I enjoyed all the companion quests. Emmrich is a delight and his quest is so wild and fun. I loved learning about Nevarra and I was awestruck by the Grand Necropolis. The mourn watch was so interesting, it showed a whole new side of Thedas' lore I knew nothing about! and I loved Manfred! Davrin is so charming, he became a favorite. I loved his quest too and learning more bits and pieces about the Dalish was great, I wish we got more. Seeing the Wardens through his quest also made me enjoy them a lot. Assan was very cute too and I'm glad he was treated as an animal and not turned into a goofy Disney sidekick too much lmao 😭 Lucanis is hilarious. The fantasy Spain/Italy was a bit silly and off at times but he is very sweet! and I love the Spite possession, that was so fun I'm glad they kept him that way! Bellara is adorable, her first backstory quest made me cry and I just love a nerd! I wish the second part of her story was written better however, and she sort of devolves into 'it's hard, I wish it was easy but it's hard' dialogues too often sadly. Anaris and the Forgotten Ones' portrayal was underwhelming and anticlimactic which was disappointing. Harding is also very cute and her Titan plotline was the most interesting to me, I bawled my eyes out in her quest!! I love the dwarven lore of this universe I'm so happy we got more of it!! ( she also fucking died in my playthrough?! I was devastated what the hell 😭 'whatever it takes' WEUEUGHHHG I'M SO SORRY) Neve was a slow burn for me because of my choices in game slowing that relationship down ( saving Treviso I mean, perdón amor 🙏 ) but I love detective novels and she is such a badass I ended up loving her. Taash was unexpected, I didn't think they would be so young. The coming of age story was sweet, though I found myself cringing a lot too at the handling of it I have to admit ( and the Lords of Fortune in general, and the Antaam...and que Qun..listen- kajshfgf ) but I also enjoyed learning more about the first expedition and the Qunari in general despite the messy writing and choices. I also loved Antoine and Evka! and Strife! And I haven't even read any of the novels they are in 😆 also Mila!!!! and her dad oh my god and Felassan haunting the narrative!! speaking of haunting, I would have loved for Cole to be in the lighthouse too I think it would have worked well 🤔 especially with the whole 'reading Solas' secret diary' thing the game had going on lmao
Everyone seems to get along except for a bit of friction that is quickly resolved at the start, which is hmm missed potential? I would have preferred more tension personally. I enjoy the drama! gives me more to work with and gives you a better grasp on everyone's personality by contrasting values. I think they wanted to speed run a found family trope for the new hero to establish some emotional stakes early on but it ended up making everyone seem like a group therapy session instead. The group meetings also have everyone either state the obvious or repeat the same opinion or conclusion to each other, I would have loved these meetings to have more bickering, have people get mad and storm out and also get to listen to different takes on a situation. Make Rook struggle more to take the reins and keep the team functional, learning how to be a leader.
Speaking of Rook! ( who in my case has a northern British accent that I loved so much 🥺) They seem to have a very established personality. I was expecting more of a blank slate but I'm lucky that the personality they went for kind of matches what I would normally choose in a first playthrough. Though the lack of range in the choices is irritating and takes away some replayability and role playing potential. Rook is very supportive and selfless, I wasn't expecting this tbh! But it all made my Rook turn into the team's weird supportive necromancer mom so it worked out in the end I guess lmao. I can't wait to draw her!!
I was so overwhelmed by the amount of information we got about Solas and his past!! I was expecting answers but not these many and not for them to be such an integral part of the plot!! The game feels like it's about him more than anything else. His arc is the best written out of all. He is mentioned in every conversation, he's the main advisor and the narrative foil, you get to talk to him often, you work for him and with him and go into his memories it all feels so surreal to me lmao I love him so I'm delighted ngl! but also making the other Evanuris so cartoonishly evil makes Solas into such an obvious choice of an ally, god of trickery or not, that it sort of takes the decision out of your hands and makes some dialogue options and companions' opinions seem almost nonsensical. I have no idea how this game would feel to someone who absolutely hates Solas' guts honestly. I suppose I will find out soon enough 😆
About Solas' story, I loved it! I somehow also feel that I knew it already, all the speculation and theories that Solavellan fans were crafting for years were so accurate that it was all very validating. Even the wildest ones! Solas as the Maker, the elves spirit origin, Mythal giving him a body, the war with the Titans, the origin of the Blight, Solas being on your side as advisor, I can go on, we knew!! Also I have to mention this I'm sorry but they made him look so hot!! unbelievable. And the bloodied teary eyed pathetic look in the end ouurghhh I'm cheering and clapping!!
The romance conclusion was so lovely 😭 the Loki and Sigyn ending we deserved to such a mythological epic!! and open ended enough for all of us to cook!! and we got to see him fight and transform into the Dread Wolf!! and whimper and cry!! and bleed and love!! that's all I ever wanted, incredible we were really spoiled what the hell I still can't believe it 😭 GDL acting was brilliant as usual! the visuals were also incredible and exactly what I had in mind when I imagined where the story may go, the eclipse, the giant wolf, the glowing eyes, the Elvhenan ruins, the statues, even the hair lmao it all aligned exactly to what I've been painting all these years but better I was thrilled 😭
Solas backstory with Mythal also offers players that didn't romance him a chance to see him act out of love and show a side they wouldn't be able to reach otherwise and I think it was smart! also very tragic and sheds more light into all of his choices and words and his relationship with Lavellan too and the parallels and reversals and uughh thoroughly enjoying the emotional distress 👌
Pleasing both the Solas lovers and haters at the same time was always going to be hard with him being such a polarizing character by design and the world states being so different but I think they did a good job! at least from my side of things.
I think my favorite part besides the Solas related stuff was the Blight. I loved how horrific and gross and threatening it was! I've always loved the concept of the Blights and I'm glad it was such a huge part of the story in this game. I also loved Treviso!! has to be the most beautiful city in Thedas ahhh and the Necropolis!! the gardens!! Vorgoth!!! Kal-Sharok!!! I can't believe we got to see it!! and a Titan!!! the giant floating face of Ghilan'nain in the clouds??? and the huge archdemons and dragons!! oh and that warden dragon trap in the shape of a griffon?? and the giant blight tendrils!! the siege at Weisshaupt was outstanding!! and the floating panopticon castle situation in Minrathous uughh there is so much I loved.
OH I also enjoyed the Varric arc even though I saw it coming since the trailer it was still played well and it was touching 🥺
The ending felt a bit jarring to me in tone though, a bit too cheerful considering...the horrors. Over half the continent destroyed and most of the problems Thedas had before the game are still there. Veil in place and all 😆
But I had fun!! I'm nitpicking really, the conclusion to Solas' story feels very satisfying to me which was my main worry so I'm happy. It is a good game!! with a sort of soft reboot feel to it and aimed at a younger audience which is probably what they were going for? You can sort of feel the struggle the team went through during production in the way the target audience seems unclear sadly. I also can't help feeling like this is an ending, so much was revealed and resolved!! but maybe I feel that way because that is what I felt after Shadowbringers / Endwalker in FFXIV once my favorite part of the story was wrapped? They can always pivot to a new continent and expand on the world and cultures we know almost nothing about, but that is always harder to sell so I have no clue where they will go from here 😵💫
Anyway I'm still processing a lot of stuff that I will probably talk (and draw) about later, this is already long enough!! for now I'll look up how to get the artbook because the art direction of this game is fantastic!! I would love to hear your thoughts too really, I'm curious about the experiences of players who made different choices and with different tastes to mine!!
#dragon age#veilguard#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age spoilers#veilguard spoilers#da4 spoilers#datv#nips blogs#I don't know what else to tag this there are so many variants#this critique is about the story and writing mostly not the technical aspects btw!#I'm aware some of these changes are unrealistic in terms of cost and time#this is a review not a rant or demand really! or it's trying to be#I enjoyed the game and will be replaying it eventually and modding the hell out of it 😌
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₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ mini pac 。⋆。 ゚
˖ ݁random things about your next lover ౨ৎ ˚
this is a small light hearted pick a pile reading, made for fun. there's a good mix of random, quirky, and deep stuff in each pile. so yeah, pick one and take what resonates or take it as a sign if it makes sense to you. {this reading is written in a non-hetero centric way}
dividers by @cafekitsune & @jimzittos images found in @saizun 's blog.
pile one pile two pile three
pile four pile five pile six
.‧͙˚ *༓ scroll down for the readings ⋆ִ ‧͙⁺˚
.
masterpost ✶ pac readings ✶ ko-fi page
⋆bookings for personal readings are open ཐིཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺
˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒐𝒏𝒆.⋆༘˚⋆
They have way too many hobbies, and they’re all kinda niche but related to creativity.
Very playful with almost everything, quirky or bizarre sense of humor.
Always looking for new things to do, seeks enjoyment and/or entertainment.
Humble, they don’t like bragging or being too loud about whatever they achieve.
They are open minded because being judgemental goes against their logic.
Amazing at teamwork.
Deep down they are actually quite structured and disciplined, despite giving off the opposite impression.
Unexpectedly responsible in their own way.
Very curious, wants to know everything about you.
Is quick to smell bullshit. Impossible for them to be lied to.
˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒘𝒐.⋆༘˚⋆
They love anything that has a darker, spooky, mysterious tone. But they are quite chill about it actually, they love scary things but they are not annoying about it.
Easily misunderstood and badly judged by others tho.
They try really hard to be good at communicating with others despite being kinda shy and almost awkward.
Always overthinking and over analyzing.
They are nerdy, but in a history or philosophy way. Probably unable to do math.
Amazing emotional intelligence, especially when it comes to dealing with difficult moments from their past.
Worried about the future: they are not too concerned about traditional success, but they are concerned about leaving some sort of impact in the world, no matter how small.
˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒓𝒆𝒆.⋆༘˚⋆
Hardworking, dedicated, passionate… maybe a workaholic.
Actually quite handy and always willing to help or solve anything.
They love their routines, they swear by them.
If they love you, after you ask them “what's going on?” they won’t reply “nothing”, they will go on about an overly specific topic that they were reminded of by something random.
Charismatic, but in a pretty eccentric way.
Black cat looks, yellow cat personality.
They are attractive because they are truly confident in themselves, and maybe quite uninterested in looking exactly like the conventional beauty ideals.
Detail oriented, borderline obsessive.
They are always doing something, always on the go, always close to burn out… because the moment they chill they accidentally begin feeling unmotivated.
. ˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒐𝒖𝒓.⋆༘˚⋆
Party animal but in a golden retriever way.
So friendly and nice it's almost scary. But in reality they really enjoy meeting people, hanging out, and chatting.
Also, quite altruistic and willing to help out anyone with anything, they don’t care who or why.
They have a lot of friends, and acquaintances, but they have a very small inner circle who they are extremely loyal to.
Very strong sense of hope for the future. They never lose the conviction that everything will eventually turn out just fine.
Their will is sometimes too strong, they don’t let anything go easily.
Either on the spotlight or in a leadership position most times. They don’t look for it, it just happens.
Sometimes overly protective, but they have quirky ways of showing that.
Not good at flirting, they're quite dorky about it, but somehow it works for them
˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒊𝒗𝒆.⋆༘˚⋆
HOT as fuck. As in sensual and captivating.
Highly perceptive about the people around them, they like to wonder how the mind works.
They might look off standish, cold or uninterested, and yes, they might be most times but that doesn't make them bad people.
In reality they are trying to look cool while being shy and afraid of intimacy.
Highly intuitive.
Many times their expectations for themselves are insane, but their expectations for others are low.
Probably super into classic literature. Dante's Inferno specifically.
Quite romantic, but also kinda pretentious about it. Don't expect average gifs, expect something that is a reference to an obscure experimental new wave french film or something.
They don't joke about their spotify playlists.
. ˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒊𝒙.⋆༘˚⋆
Highly sensitive and creative but in a Lana del Rey kind of way.
They really have a sort of "old soul" vibe.
Too empathetic for their own good, but they are always working on it.
Staying at home is their favourite thing to do, specially if there's sweets involved.
Incredibly patient. They actually prefer slow-paced everything. Books, movies, shows, hobbies, everything.
Probably into crafty hobbies and podcasts.
They have a very low social battery, but they are always willing to put the effort if it is because of someone they appreciate.
Very proud of their roots and overall life journey.
Not very talkative, unless they have something they deem important and necessary to share.
masterpost ✶ pac readings ✶ personal readings
✶ ko-fi page ✶
⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆ available for personal readings ⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺
#tarot blog#tarotblr#tarot reading#free tarot#tarot#pick a card reading#tarotscope#tarotonline#daily tarot#pick a card#special person#love tarot reading#pac tarot#fs pick a pile#tarot pick a pile#pick a pile tarot#pick a pile#tarot pac#pac reading#love pick a card#love pac#love tarot free#love tarot spread#tarot cards#free tarot readings#tarot community#tarot deck#tarot readings#tarotcommunity#tarot services
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10 Lethal Injuries to Add Pain to Your Writing
Prev: Non-Lethal Injury Ideas
Need some creative ways to give your characters a real fight for survival? Here are 10 ideas:
1. Punctured Artery
A puncture to major arteries like the femoral artery (thigh), the carotid artery (neck), or radial artery (arm) can cause rapid blood loss. It starts off with a sharp pain, weakness, lightheadedness and eventually can lead to hypovolemic shock. Requires urgent medical attention.
2. Punctured Eye Socket
A punctured eye socket will cause blood vessel damage leading to internal bleeding. I would use this for non-combat characters trying to get away. The eyes are an easy weak spot + you don’t need much strength to cause a critical injury/puncture. Also good for a protag's tragic backstory.
3. Torn Achilles Tendon
A torn Achilles tendon can result in severe bleeding if nearby arteries or veins are damaged. Your character will be forced to hobble away as pain causes their foot to swell and bruise. Plus, you can easily adjust the pain levels per your scene, from swift cuts to explosive jumps.
4. Neck Hyperextension (Hangman’s Fracture)
This injury will fracture the C2 vertebra and can lead to spinal cord damage, paralysis or sudden death. This isn’t a light injury your character can come back from, so I would suggest using it only when you’re aiming for death.
5. Pierced Lung
A punctured lung will lead to a pneumothorax where air escapes into the chest cavity, collapsing the lung. Characters with this injury may have difficulty breathing, chest pain, and a cough that produces frothy blood (all the dramatics you need).
6. Severe Concussion
A severe concussion will lead to confusion, vomiting, immobility and memory loss. More dangerously, brain swelling, internal bleeding and damaged brain tissue. Plus, it has a long recovery period.
7. Shattered Pelvis
If you need something severe that restricts mobility but also causes severe pain then this is perfect! Involves signs of shock, internal bleeding, numbness, swelling—really a lot of things. Can occur if OC falls from a high place, hit repeatedly, car accident, etc.
8. Internal Bleeding from Blunt Force Trauma
I like using this when you need something subtle since it doesn't show immediate symptoms. Over time, they will feel weak, cold, nauseous, and intense pain. Perfect if you want that 'everyone made it out then suddenly someone collapses' moment.
9. Intestinal Perforation
A sharp blow or penetrating wound can cause a tear in the intestines, leaking bacteria into the body cavity, then peritonitis. It can go from small stomach pain to near death pretty quickly. Without prompt medical care, sepsis can set in, causing organ failure and death.
10. Cut to the Jugular
If you need something more visibly dramatic then go with the classic cut to the jugular. A warm rush of blood will pour out, and blood would spurt with every heartbeat. Causes panic, choking, and internal bleeding too. All the blood and gore you need.
This is a quick, brief list of ideas to provide writers inspiration. Since it is a shorter blog, I have not covered the injuries in detail. Remember the worse the injury the more likely your character is to die (so be realistic folks). Happy writing! :)
Looking For More Writing Tips And Tricks?
Check out the rest of Quillology with Haya; a blog dedicated to writing and publishing tips for authors!
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This kind of disguising of important information among mundane details is a key aspect of golden age (1920s-1930s) detective fiction and is always really fun in that context. One of my favorite examples is in Dorothy L. Sayers' 1930 detective novel Strong Poison.
Here's the relevant excerpt on page 27 of my edition (Avon, 1967):
"I wish I had known that girl," replied the Dowager, in her usual indirect manner, "so interesting and a really remarkable face, though perhaps not strictly good-looking, and all the more interesting for that, because good-looking people are so often cows. I have been reading one of her books, really quite good and so well-written, and I didn't guess the murderer till page 200, rather clever, because I usually do it about page 15."
I cannot attest to whether this is the case in every edition, because pagination can change, but the beautiful thing about this nugget--delivered by a character who appears to be a slightly air-headed older woman but who, on occasion, shows a surprising level of perceptiveness--is that if I turn back to page 15, I have all the crucial evidence I need to solve the murder mystery that won't actually be fully revealed until about page 189. You aren't likely to catch exactly what you've been told on a first reading, but going back to chapter 1 after completing the book equips you with everything you need to see the solution to the whole thing in the opening scene.
oh i never know how to explain this properly but i looooooooooooooooove when a story just absolutely TELLS you something and it’s so obvious it goes right by you. like the equivalent of hiding in plain sight. i’m thinking in the original cut(?) of alien where they showed the full xenomorph, crouched and ready to pounce, but because we’ve never seen it before, we can’t tell what it is and interpret it as part of the spaceship. or it’s a detail that seems so out of place or wildly insane that you automatically ignore it and assume you misinterpreted until that exact detail comes back in a big way? (like when noah the raven boy flat out tells everyone he’s a ghost and they take it as a joke, so the reader does too) is there a tvtropes name for this i’m obsessed with it
#books#writing#detective novels#unrelatedly this book has a later bit lampooning the London literary scene of the time that had me literally shrieking
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giving rafe a blowjob
pairings: bsf!rafe x vixen!reader
“Come on, princess,” Rafe murmurs, his pants already pooled around his feet, his voice rough and warm. His hand brushes through your hair, thumb grazing your cheek, guiding you closer. “Kiss the tip again, Vixen,” he breathes, his words full of encouragement, his hand gentle yet steady as it cradles your face.
Your lips part, eyes glancing up to meet his with anticipation. Slowly, you press a soft, lingering kiss to his tip, tasting his salty precum. Rafe lets out a low groan, his fingers tightening in your hair, his expression a mix of pride and surprise. “And you said you’d never done this before,” he teases, voice low and edged with surprise. “Could’ve fooled me, baby.”
The praise in his voice spurs you on, filling you with confidence. You open your mouth a little wider, lips wrapping around him, letting him feel the warmth of your mouth as you begin to slowly suck. He exhales sharply, his breath catching as his other hand gently brushes down your cheek, eyes locked on you. “That’s it… God, yeah,” he whispers, almost to himself, his voice reverent. “Just like that, princess.”
As you continue, his gaze never leaves yours, a dark intensity filling his eyes. You feel his thumb stroke gently over your cheek, his breathing becoming more uneven as you move. His hands remain steady, not pushing but guiding, showing you how much he appreciates your every movement. “Yeah, that’s it, baby. Take your time,” he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion, his gaze focused on every detail, watching the way you listen to him, respond to him.
You lean forward, taking a bit more of him into your mouth, savoring the closeness, letting the sensations deepen. His hands tighten just slightly, his fingers caressing your hair as he lets out another quiet groan, his voice soft and full of awe. “You’re so damn good at this,” he murmurs, half to himself. “It’s like you were made to do this… made for me.”
He pauses, gaze softening as his thumb brushes your cheek. “Didn’t know my girl could be so brave. You surprise me every time.”
The warmth of his words makes your heart pound, and you murmur, “Only for you, Rafey.”
“Yeah?” He raises an eyebrow, his voice turning tender. “Then show me, baby—show me how much.”
With each slow, careful movement, you let yourself get lost in the rhythm, savoring the way he reacts to you, the way his body responds with each small motion. You press forward again, your lips forming a soft seal, your tongue tracing along his thick cock, feeling the way he tenses beneath you.
He lets out a low, desperate groan, his thumb brushing over your cheek in a tender gesture, grounding you. “Fuck, you look so good like this,” he breathes, his voice rough, his gaze fixed on you with a mix of awe and disbelief. “Look at you… being so damn eager for me.”
You hollow your cheeks a bit more, sucking a little deeper, feeling his hand flex in your hair as he mutters a few breathless curses under his breath. “God, yeah… just like that, princess. Keep going. Just… keep going,” he whispers, his voice strained, his breathing coming faster now, his gaze intense. His thumb brushes over your bottom lip, his eyes softening as he looks down at you, his expression one of pure affection and admiration.
The room feels warm, quiet, as though everything outside this moment has faded away. You move slowly, savoring every sensation, letting his low groans and whispers fill the air, grounding you in this intimate moment. Rafe’s hand slides down to cup your cheek, his touch tender, his thumb brushing over your skin as he murmurs softly, “You’re so damn beautiful, you know that?”
You pull back just slightly, his breathing shaky as he watches you, his fingers tracing a gentle line along your jaw. “Taking me so well,” he murmurs, his voice soft but firm. “You’re driving me insane.” His voice is rough, his tone thick with pride and wonder. He pauses, his thumb grazing over your lips, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Mhm...baby....tell me that you’re mine,” he groans, a teasing warmth in his voice.
As you continue, his breaths come quicker, each exhale shakier than the last. He looks down at you, a mix of pride and tenderness in his gaze, his eyes soft even in the heat of the moment. “I’m close, baby,” he says, his voice husky, his thumb brushing over your cheek. “You sure…you sure you’re okay?” His voice is full of care, making sure you’re comfortable, that you’re here with him because you want to be.
You nod slightly, meeting his gaze, giving him the reassurance he needs. He lets out a shuddering breath, his body tightening as he murmurs another soft, “God, yeah… just like that.”
Moments later, his body tenses, and he lets out a low groan, his hips jerking slightly as he reaches his climax, his release warm in your mouth. You feel his pulse under your touch, the quiet aftermath filled with his heavy breathing and murmured curses as he slowly comes down. His hands stay gentle, cradling you as though you’re something precious, his thumbs brushing over your cheeks in soft, grounding strokes.
After a moment, he looks down at you, a slow smile spreading across his face, his eyes filled with admiration and a hint of something deeper. He reaches down, helping you up, his touch tender as he pulls you close, wrapping his arms around you. “Come here,” he murmurs, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead, his fingers tracing soothing circles on your back. The closeness is comforting, a quiet acknowledgment of the bond you both share in this moment.
In the quiet that follows, he cradles your face, his thumb brushing over your cheek, his voice soft yet intense. “Tell me you’re mine,” he murmurs, his gaze searching yours, his expression full of quiet longing. “I want to hear you say it.”
You meet his gaze, heart racing, feeling the warmth in his words. “I’m yours, Rafe,” you whisper, a gentle promise in your voice, meeting his eyes with unwavering sincerity.
A faint smirk touches his lips, his fingers tracing a line along your jaw as he holds your gaze. “Say it again… just like that,” he murmurs, his voice low, a hint of satisfaction in his tone.
Your heart skips a beat as you meet his gaze, your voice soft but confident. “I’m yours, Daddy,” you say, letting the words linger in the air, knowing he feels the depth behind them.
Rafe’s smile softens, his gaze filled with pride and warmth as he brushes a gentle kiss against your lips. “Good girl,” he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion. “You’re perfect, you know that?”
In the stillness of the moment, he holds you close, his touch gentle, comforting, a silent acknowledgment of the closeness you both share. His arms around you feel like both a promise and a place to belong, and as he pulls you even closer, you know that this is exactly where you’re meant to be.
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#rafe x reader#rafe x you#rafe outer banks#rafe fic#outerbanks rafe#rafe#rafe imagine#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe obx#obx#obx fic#obx cast#outer banks#obx season 4#obx4#outer banks season 4#outerbanks#outer banks netflix
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HOW DID YOU GET USED TO THE HAUNTING, THE WILLING, THE MISSING, THE WANTING — YUUTA OKKOTSU
content, warnings. more of the knight yuuta universe yippee. i got an ask about telling him he’d make a good prince and flustering him, and that struck something in me, though this interpretation of that ask is probably a bit darker/more serious than envisioned... i will publish the ask w the other version of this scenario too. unfortunately for everybody involved i was a theater kid and i did listen to cell block tango and the first half of hamilton before i had this idea </3 i’m sorry if you can tell
more notes. set in the same universe as this drabble, which are all set in the same universe as a full fic draft i have and would love to finish some day lol. anyway, say hello to the gojo of this au
You are not ready to be queen. As much as you resent your mother, your father, the elders in the cabinet, the system you were raised in—as much as you wish to be a ruler that creates change and peace in your court and kingdom, you know that you are not ready to hold that position.
It shows now more than ever, with your parents being escorted to a neighboring kingdom for a meeting, and you in charge of the harvest ball. There is china to be chosen, silverware to be polished, candlesticks to be blessed, gowns to be sewn, a menu to be curated, a ballroom to be prepared—and you are sorely behind on all of your duties.
A lackluster princess does not make for a promising queen. And distractions do not help you become anything of yourself.
“I do not have time to discuss the lilies Sir Gojo. I am aware they are drooping and that they are your favorite, but I do not control the weather,” you sigh, handing back a scroll to a maid before turning to your head knight.
“That sounded very queenly, my little lady! You’ve been practicing,” he towers above you, with a growing smile and little care for your position. He bends forward to press the tip of his gloved pointer finger to your nose, “I too mourn the lilies, but I am afraid I agree: we have much more pressing matters to discuss. Come along, shall we?”
You’ve learned to be wary of Sir Gojo’s words over the years. He often leads with a false timbre, or makes otherwise simple conversation into a riddle for his own amusement. Even as you’ve learned when to ignore his games, you’ve also grown appreciative of his light demeanor, and his insistence on speaking to you directly, rather than shielding you away.
You take his arm, looping yours through his, and allow him to lead you down the courtyard steps and into the grand garden. You put your trust in him, allowing your feet to follow the path he sets, and letting your mind wander. You wonder whether you should set the gold or bronze-trimmed plates for the ball, if the curtains should remain closed or open, if the embossed or embellished silverware would leave a better impression on your guests.
“Princess?” your knight calls for you. You focus your attention back to him, apologizing for your lapse in attention.
You expect a smile, perhaps another press to your nose and a light scolding, but Gojo’s expression is much more neutral. “Sir?”
“I said that Lord Hajime is dead. His court will send a representative to the harvest ball, but how would you like to proceed?”
“Dead?” your breath hitches momentarily, “Was he unwell?”
“I do not know. The letter gave no detail. I believe the court sent an apology for not being able to deliver a suitor as promised. The family wishes to keep this private until after the harvest.”
When you look up to him, you see no mischief in his expression. He’s serious, and you feel lightheaded, warm, and icy all at once. “I see,” you say, and pull away from Gojo’s arm, “Excuse me. I—I need a moment to myself.”
“You are sick? So suddenly?” Gojo asks, turning with your body so that his back is never to you.
“No—I… I… I need to be alone,” you confess, wrapping your arms around themselves, curling into your own body. Gojo stands firm, a short nod in understanding. He raises his hand to make a signal; an order for the knights on the periphery who can see but not hear.
You smile, small, grateful for him. “Please, arrange our finest favors, and ask Ieiri for her favorite elixir.”
Gojo’s smile reflects yours, albeit stained with more sympathy. “Of course.”
“And tell the maids that I shall postpone the table placements until tomorrow morning. Should you find yourself with time to spare, let me know if you prefer the bronze to gold trim.”
Gojo nods, taking a half-step to stand in front of you. In times like these, you feel like the little princess under his watch and care from when you were younger. His presence is frightening, overwhelming, and yet, more comforting and welcoming than your own parents.
Carefully, he leans down to whisper, “Yuuta and his fleet have not yet returned, he will not be in the knight’s chambers. I will send him to you when he arrives.” You blink in sudden awe, and Gojo smiles, reaches for your hand and raises it to his lips to press a chaste kiss, “Do not regret too long, princess.”
You hear him before you see him. It’s a bad habit for a knight, you think; you can always hear or feel where Yuuta is, even if you can’t see him. You think he ought to be more stealthy, more secretive, quieter; but then again, you don’t. He reserves plenty of stealth for his motives, stores plenty of secrets in his mind, keeps his words quiet or has a way of keeping other people’s quiet.
The throne room is cold. It’s your least favorite room in the castle, but tonight, you hope it inspires you.
You don’t sit on your throne, you don’t sit on your mother’s or your father’s; you don’t sit at all. You stand, at the top of the stairs, staring at the seats and the tapestry and the paintings of your forefathers that decorate the backdrop. Behind you, at the base of the stairs, Yuuta kneels. You don’t need to see him to know; you can feel it on your palms with your hands behind your back; you can see it in the eyes of your grandfather’s portrait, you can hear it in the way his knee hits the carpet.
“You may stand.”
“I shouldn’t, my lady,” Yuuta replies, “Not here.”
“You do many things you shouldn’t,” you sigh, steady, “Stand, Yuuta.”
You hear the metal of his armor rustle against itself. You can feel when he stands; it feels like he’s right behind you, even though you know he’s ten steps below you.
You inhale, slowly; exhale, slowly. Clench your hands behind your back, and then relax your shoulders the way you’ve seen your grandfather do. Then, you speak. “Lord Hajime is dead.”
You turn, slowly, and wait until your cape has finished its turn, has settled behind you again before you speak again; a tactic your grandmother was fond of. “Lord Hajime is dead,” you repeat, “He is dead, and I asked you not to kill him.”
Yuuta looks up to you. Neck craned, hands neatly behind his back, his helmet on the carpeted floor to his left. He does not look small.
You take a step downwards. “I said this is not how I wanted matters to be resolved.” Another step down, a pause, then repeat, “I said that I do not wish to resort to violence.” Another step down, a pause, “To resort to murder.” Another step down, hurried, “I stood under my balcony,” another step, “and I told you not to murder Lord Hajime. I told you not to kill him,” another step; a pause, hysterical, “And yet Lord Hajime is dead. He is dead because—”
“I did not kill him.”
You pause your descent, four steps above Yuuta. You are only half a head taller than him like this. At this distance you can see the gray of his irises, wide and speckled with brown, without a shred of remorse pooling within them. It makes you sneer.
“You expect me to believe that it is a coincidence that a fortnight after I catch you on your way to murder Lord Hajime, that he dies?” you question, rhetorical, “I am naive, but I am not a fool, Yuuta.”
“You are no fool, my princess, and Lord Hajime was no saint,” Yuuta shakes his head, “He was a tyrant. He took three wives prior and treated them all as whores. He alone was responsible for the destruction of the crops in the north. He had only himself to blame.” Yuuta pauses, and you see something melt behind steely eyes. “It was a murder, yes, but not a crime.”
Yuuta’s lips wobble slightly, but the rest of him remains upright. It always goes like this: first his head, then his heart, then his body following—in everything he does. You blink, slowly, and take another step down; eye-level with Yuuta at this height.
“You did not kill him,” you repeat, leveled with revelation, “You just gave the order.”
Yuuta’s eyelids fall slowly, then his head follows in a shallow nod. He keeps his neck bent, keeps his head hung in front of you. You sigh.
“Who was it this time,” you ask. He does not raise his head; you do not wait for him to speak, you dip your head so that your lips are level with his ears. “Megumi? Surely he would have hated the way Lord Hajime treated his livestock. Maybe Yuuji—he has been impatient to prove himself since recovering from his last injury. Or perhaps Toge, he would’ve done it swiftly in his sleep, without a sound.”
Yuuta keeps his gaze on the floor, keeps his words quiet. “Nobara.”
“Dame Nobara, who strives to replace you as my first blade?” you question, “What, as some kind of test of loyalty to you?”
Yuuta raises his head, eyes stern, brows drawn. “No, princess. To you.”
You freeze. Your anger flares, and then subsides to only weak embers as you understand Yuuta’s motives, and Sir Gojo’s final words to you. You’re careful when you reach forward to brush your knuckle against Yuuta’s cold cheek, only the kiss of a touch between your finger and his face; even, still, he shudders, and you watch him melt from head to toe; from his eyebrows to his eyes to his lips to his shoulders to his knees.
“You are disobedient, and indignant, and ruthless,” you list, voice soft, touch softer as you allow your fingers to graze the top of his ears, adoring the flush that follows, “And kind, and careful, and charming.”
You watch the color stain Yuuta’s cheeks and his ears, you revel in the pout on his lips, and the effort of his breathing. You only wish he were this easy to tame all the time.
Still, he precious to you, so you are careful when you raise your opposite hand to his face, taking advantage of the difference in your status and stature to tilt his head upwards, lean down and press your words against his cheek, “You would make for a lovely prince,” you tell him, “The people would love you. Our enemies would fear you. The soldiers would respect you.” The kisses between your sentences are featherweight, trailed from the high point of his cheekbone to the corner of his lips.
You can feel him quiver when you pull back, moving a palm back to his cheek to pinch his skin between your thumb and forefinger, “If only you knew how to listen.”
Yuuta winces, but he does not pull away. He parts his lips to steady his breath, and then to speak, strained, “Please, princess. Have mercy.”
And for the first time in a fortnight you smile, watching splotched skin stain your knight’s cheeks when you soften your hold on him. You pull Yuuta’s head up further, lean yours down for a careful kiss; short, chaste, the kind you know he hates the most.
“Oh, Yuuta,” you coo, grazing your thumb against his face, endeared by his wide eyes and quiet whimpers, “This is mercy.”
#jujustu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen fluff#yuuta x reader#gojo satoru x reader#yuuta okkotsu x reader#yuta okkotsu x reader#jjk imagines#jjk scenarios#satoru gojo smut#jjk smau#there is so much unneccesary lore to this fic if i could actually finish it it would be like. 18k words#but these smaller parts are easier and hopefully will paint a similar enough picture in the end?#this is diff i guess its more from readers pov last time it was his#hmm maybe it would make More sense if u got to see him interacting w the other knights#n e waysssssssss
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Hey can you do more of Aaron x non bau rich fem!reader. Like maybe with jack
ANON!!!! I’m just out here living my rich stepmom life now, okay? Jack is so cute!!!! I swear I’m weak for domestic Hotch | WC: 423
Inside the living room, you sat on the floor, surrounded by colorful art supplies, while Jack busily worked on his latest school project. The grand space, often reserved for elegant soirées and refined gatherings, had been transformed into a cozy art studio for the day, with large sheets of paper spread out, and markers and paint scattered everywhere.
Jack, his little face scrunched in concentration, held up his creation for you to see. “What do you think?” he asked eagerly, showing off a drawing of what appeared to be a dragon, flying over a castle that looked suspiciously like your home.
You smiled warmly, leaning closer to inspect the details. ���It’s perfect, Jack! I love how fierce the dragon looks. You’re getting really good at this. I'm sure your teacher will be impressed with your skills and give you a gold star for the fairy tale topic!” you praised, reaching out to ruffle his hair affectionately.
Jack beamed at your words. “I think Dad’s going to like it, too,” he said, glancing toward the doorway where Hotch had been watching the two of you quietly, his expression soft.
Aaron’s voice cut through the gentle ambiance. “I’m sure I will,” he said, walking into the room and joining you on the floor. His suit jacket was off, and his tie loosened for the first time all day, but he looked relaxed.
“Dad, look! I made the dragon like the one from the book you read to me last night,” Jack explained, already diving into another story about his creation.
You exchanged a fond look with Aaron, who smiled at the scene. This — these simple moments — they were everything to him. “I think we have a true artist on our hands,” Aaron said, his hand gently resting on your shoulder as he sat down beside you, his eyes were full of affection for the both of you.
You grinned, pulling Jack into a little side hug. “I’d say so. I think we'll need more wall space for all of his masterpieces though,” you teased, already scouting which painting you'd have to take down. It made Jack giggle.
Aaron chuckled softly too, his arm slipping around your waist as he looked between the two people he cared for most. It wasn’t the opulence of the mansion or the high-profile life that mattered to him — it was the warmth of the family you had created, the quiet joy of being together, and the love that effortlessly filled the room every time you were together.
#💌 - you've got mail#hoe4hotchner answers#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#aaron hotchner x reader#hotch#hotch thoughts#criminal minds x reader#hotchner#x reader#hotch x you#inbox is open#anon <3#anon asks#aaron hotch#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch hotchner#thomas gibson#ssa aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x y/n#aaron hotchner x female reader#hotch x y/n#hotch x reader#aaron hotch x you#aaron hotchner fanfic#aaron hotchner imagine#aaron hotchner fanfiction#aaron hotchner fluff#hotch fluff
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rockstar gf!reader x bf!haechan headcanon | m.list
⌕word count:1k
warnings | nsfw, jerking off, dirty talk, eating out.
a/n | I hope you like it baby🤍 @ldh0000
enjoy reading!
★ He's your number one fan. He never fails to watch every one of your comebacks with a smile on his face and pride. Even though he doesn't show this pride to you most of the time. "Of course you did a good job. You're my girlfriend."
★ He likes to follow your style, he likes to dress the way you dress. Sometimes he doesn't hesitate to ask for your advice and loves to share his leather jacket with you.
★ He loves it when you go on stage with his jewelry. He gives you his own ring even though he knows it won't fit your finger, and when he sees you wearing it as a necklace in the next performance, he completely loses control.
★ Doing his makeup is one of his favorite activities. While you're sitting on his lap, his hand on your waist, he'll occasionally hold himself back from sticking his lips to yours while he examines your entire face. We can say that he completely inherited his obsession with using eyeliner from you and can't stop it now.
★ His social media accounts are full of you. Photos of you on stage, photos of you at home, photos of you working on a song in the studio... And the list goes on, he doesn't forget to write notes under each photo about how much he loves you. I wasn't lying when I said he's your number one fan...
★ It doesn't matter to him whether he's on the backstage or in the crowd, but he likes to shoot you from the front with his camera. Sometimes when you spot him in the crowd and walk up to him and look him in the eye while sing the lyrics, it literally melts him, and you know it very well.
★ He loves playing your guitar. Helping you with the notes while you hum the lyrics is his favorite thing, after a while you may find him getting carried away by your beauty and stop playing the guitar to look at you with admiration.
★ You know he loves singing your songs out loud and you are aware of how beautiful his voice is. So one day when you invite him to sing with you on stage, he looks at you in surprise and tries to make sure you are not joking. But after he accept, he realizes that it was the best decision he ever made. He approaches you when doesn’t care about the crowd, staring lovingly at every detail of your face, and he is captivated by the music and more so by you. When the music ends, he doesn’t forget to give you a small kiss on the lips before leaving the stage to you.
!Nsfw Content!
★ Fucking in backstage and in the studio... It’s a thousand times better than fucking in a bed. Well sometimes you can write inappropriate lyrics in your songs and it can turn Haechan on immediately. He likes to whisper dirty words in your ear while kissing your neck from behind. "I swear you were thinking of me while writing these. Why don't we do it again? I can give you new inspirations." You could almost say that fucking in the backstage has become a tradition. He knows how nervous you are to sing this every time a new song comes out, and he likes to get rid of that nervousness. While your fans are excitedly waiting for you to go on stage, they have no idea that Haechan is eating you out until you relieve your stress. "Just leave yourself to me, you don't have to do anything, baby. But if you really want to, you can help me out at the end of the night as a way to thank me."
★ Sometimes he tells you to sit on his lap while you write the lyrics, so he'll feel better because he'll be close to you. But when your hips are right next to his bulge, you can find him laying you on the table and fucking you. He just can't stay still, and everything you do makes him so much more excited. While you're on his lap, his hand wanders around your leg helplessly, his lips kissing your neck. "I don't think a little break would hurt anyone. Come on, is it more important the song you wrote for your fans or your boyfriend who's been waiting for you for hours with this bulge?"
★ Every time he sees you playing the guitar, he can't stop thinking about your beautiful fingers around his cock. When his eyes are actually on your face, he slowly moves down to see how your fingers move over the strings, and it makes him lean back and completely lose himself in the situation he's in. When you stop playing the guitar, he'll just whine. "Is it over? Please play it one more time. You know that's my favorite song." And fingers? Fingers. At the end of the day, he'll lean his head back and close his eyes while you're jerking him off, and he'll make a huge mess as he finally gets what he's dreamed of. "Oh sorry..I- keep going..Please..I'm still hard, fuck-"
★ He's definitely vocal and he's not afraid to show it. Sometimes it scares you to know that he can reach a higher note than you, but on the other hand, it's something you enjoy. Haechan is a big switch and he can do it both ways very well. When he’s on top he doesn’t hesitate to use his deep voice on you, he loves to tease you and for him listening to your moan with that beautiful voice of yours is the most beautiful melody he’s ever heard. “Yeah, that’s it..Don’t hide your beautiful voice from me, scream and shout as much as you want, I can see you doing it on stage, you can do it for me too, right?”. When he’s on bottom, things don’t change much. He’s still a naughty horny brat and that shows more when he’s on bottom. Sometimes he’ll turn you on before you go on stage and when he leaves you like that you have to sing with that wetness for hours and seeing him excitedly await the punishment he’ll receive from you at the end of the night reminds you of how naughty he is again. “You know I didn’t do this on purpose…I’m sorry baby, are you really going to punish me?” He’s been waiting for this moment for hours.
#nct imagines#nct dream imagines#nct smut#nct dream#nct dream smut#nct 127 imagines#nct 127 smut#haechan x reader#haechan fluff#haechan smut#haechan imagines#nct haechan#haechan headcanons#nct headcanons#nct dream headcanons#nct dream hard thoughts#nct dream hard hours#haechan hard thoughts#haechan hard hours
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𝘑𝘢𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺
𝓹𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: idol!Jay x fem!reader
𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓭 𝓬𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓽: 1.6k words
𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰: smut, needy Jay, sleepy reader, consensual, oral (m and f receiving), orgasm denial, Jay and reader calling Jay 'daddy', pet names (darling, dear, baby), manhandling, unprotected sex, overstimulation, p in v, neck biting, marks, filthy, rough, little bit of aftercare
𝓐/𝓝: Hi guys! This is my first ever post and first smut fanfic ever so I hope y'all enjoy it! (I know I said idol!Jay but it's not rlly an important detail)
𝓟𝓻𝓸𝓸𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭
The door slams behind Jay's tall, but tired body. After spending an entire day practicing and trying not to lose his mind from the other 6, all he wants is to fuck you into oblivion. His entire commute home he just imagined shoving your face in the pillow with your pretty ass up in the air for him to destroy.
Jay is a gentleman, but tonight he just can't seem to hold it in.
As he enters you guys' appartment, he sees all the lights on, but no y/n. He first thinks you fell asleep on the couch, as you often do whilst waiting for Jay to come home, but when he sees the bedroom door ajar with a very dim light on he realises you've already gone to bed.
Something inside of him snaps. Jay takes pride in the fact he can remain gentle with you. His dirty thoughts often not preformed in fear you'll be disgusted by it. However seeing you laying peacefully in bed, phone next to you presumebly falling asleep sooner than you anticipated, he just couldn't it in anymore.
He drops his bag and makes a beeline to your shared bedroom. He pulls down his pants, not fully, but enough to let out his hard, throbbing cock. He grabs you by your hair and puts your mouth all the way down his dick.
You wake up and in your sleepy haze, you don't know what's going on, but when you look up with your innocent eyes into Jay's eyes, you relax. Jay doesn't move your head. He's just cockwarming himself with your mouth, seemingly calming down with just this.
However, you're starting to get a little horny and want more action than just cockwarming him. So you slowly start moving your head up and down.
Jay pulls out and with his other hand he grabs your jaw, forcing you to look up to him. His eyes filled with something you've never seen before in him. He's both seems desperate, mad and horny out of his minds. You think its kind of hot and you start rubbing your thighs together to get some friction.
'Stop that,' Jay finally end the silence between you. You don't stop, 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘑𝘢𝘺, 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘥𝘰? Oh how wrong you were. His hand that was previously holding your hair shot down to one of your thighs, holding to one side whilst he lifts his foot to hold down your other thighs so you have no way of rubbing them together anymore.
The shock on your face excites him, 'didn't expect that, darling?' He asks with a smirk. You don't move, say or even go as far as to change your facial expression. Jay is showing a side of him he's never shown, and you actually find it very attractive.
When you stay still like a prey caught in the hands of their predator, he starts to squeeze his hand on your jaw, forcing your mouth open. When you comply Jay gathers his spit and slowly lets it fall from his mouth into yours.
'Good girl.' He says. You're sure you've become the Niagara falls with the way he's treating you, finding it even more hot than when he's gentle and putting your pleasure above his.
Once Jay notices his effect on you and how you've become pathetic and desperate, he grants you a kiss. It's slow, wet and filthy, and you want so much more of that. He pulls back and his hand on your thigh travels back to the back of your head, guiding you to his cock. His tip now completely covered with precum.
He starts both pushing you head down on his dick and fucking your mouth. The only noise coming from your room is you gagging. Jay has to hold himself back, because this view of you, chocking on his cock, not allowed to touch yourself, looking up at you with tear filled eyes, it's got him on edge and he feels like if he lets loose for one second he's gonna explode in your mouth.
After he is pleased with the way you're taking him, he moves down on you and takes off your pyjama pants and panties in one motion. The cold air hits your wet pussy and you squeek a little. Jay looks up one time, with fucked out eyes already, before he dives into his late night snack.
The way he's teasing your cunt has you moaning his name on a level you normally wouldn't use, but with how horny you are, how hot Jay looks and the still sleepy haze you're in has you absolutely unhinged.
'Fuck Jay, oh my fucking god that's it,' He thrives on your moans, he's circling your clit even faster, pushing his tongue deeper in your hole. 'Shit I'm gonna- Ah fuck!' Jay knows you're about to come and right before you reach your climax, he backs up, not touching you in any way, shape or form to avoid accidentally making you cum with any kind of touch.
You squirm and shake and Jay is smiling at you like a devil, enjoying seeing you both already overstimulated and being denied pleasure. When you finally have the strength to look at him you almost want to slap him, he knows how desperate you are for your release and he just fucking denies it.
'That's what sluts get when they go to bed before waiting for daddy to come home,' He says with a tint of darkness in his eyes, as if he can't wait to fuck you into another universe and deny another orgasm.
In your entire two year relationship you've never called Jay daddy, so you're a little taken aback when he calls himself daddy.
'𝘍𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘣𝘦 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵.' Is the only thing you can think before he pulls you down the bed before flipping you onto your stomach. He manhandles you into doggy before lining himself up with you and slamming into you without any warning.
The noises you make are pathetic and so dirty and you're loving every bit of this side of Jay. You have difficulty keeping up with everything as he's slamming his long and thick cock all the way into your pussy every single time at high speed.
As you feel your high coming again, your pussy clenches tightly around him with you whimpering into the bed sheets. 'You like this dick so much, baby?' You can hear the smugness in his voice. 'Yes yes, love it aah' 'C'mon baby, say it.' 'Yes daddy, love it.' You barely manage to get out.
'Fuck that's my girl,' is the last thing you hear before you're engulfed by the pleasure of the orgasm, almost screaming his name. 'Holy shit that's so tight,' Jay says before he throws his head back and shoots white ropes of his cum into your pussy. He keeps pumping into you as you both ride out your orgasms.
After you both finish, you think it's over. You're tired, overstimulated and just want to cuddle your boyfriend.
Yet your boyfriend seems to not be done with you yet. Having fucked his frustrations out, he's a little bit more gentle. He guides your hips to turn around so he can look you in the eyes. 'Mmh you did so well baby, taking all of me like it was nothing,' You smile, still lightheaded. 'You ready for round 2?' You nod, not fully realising you just said yes to getting railed again.
This time he's gonna make you take all of him in missionary, kissing you before entering. But the gentleness didn't last long before he starts speeding up. Both of you start moaning in each others mouth, sweat mixing up as he presses his forehead against yours. 'Fuck daddy I can't.' 'Yes you can baby,' He knows you're overstimulated, he can feel your pussy throbbing and clenching onto his dick like your life depends on it, but he doesn't care. He needs to cum again.
The thrusts start to get deeper. He's going so deep he's hitting your cervix. You jolt as you feel him hitting that spot. With your neck so exposed, he starts to kiss and bite your neck, biting and sucking so hard he's leaving marks on your neck. 'Mine.' He says in a very deep voice, almost animalistic.
Your head is in a completely different place, the only thing you are on this earth is a moaning mess and Jay is loving every moment of it. Both of you start climbing to your climax again as Jay doesn't stop fucking you into oblivion and you don't stop being a tight hole for him.
'Daddy I'm gonna cum please let me cum.' You blurt out, not caring how pathetic you sounds calling your boyfriend daddy and begging him to cum.
'Cum for me, angel.'
That sends you over the edge. Your legs are shaking, breath hitching, eyes rolling back. The view of you completely crumbling under his touch makes Jay cum so much harder than the first orgasm. He's moaning your name whilst sloppily trying to maintain his speed. He keeps pumping until he can see his cum drip out of your pussy. That sight makes him almost hard again.
𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘹 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘥
Jay pulls out of you, brings you up to his chest and hugs you tightly. 'Sorry baby, was I a bit too rough?' 'No oh my god that was so fucking hot.' He grins widely, very happy with himself.
'Let's get you cleaned up, dear.' You nod as he leads you to the bathroom where he fills up the bathtub. You eventually lay together, lazily washing each other, not saying much but both still riding on your highs and enjoying each others company.
𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐬, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝! <𝟑
#enhypen#enha#enhypen jay#enhypen jongseong#jay x reader#jongseong x reader#park jongseong#jongseong smut#jay park#enha jongseong#enha jay#smut#park jay#jay enhypen#jay smut#enha smut#enhypen smut
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Become Your Dream Girl in 2025
Defining your dream girl persona
The first step into becoming your dream girl is to have a clear picture of her in your mind. Imagine her life in detail; her aesthetic, her habits, and even her energy. This is the time to get specific.
Visualization Exercise: Sit in a quiet space, close your eyes, and visualize your dream girl persona. How does she dress? What places does she visit? What are her priorities and goals? Let yourself feel her confidence, luxury, and elegance.
Create a Vision Board: Gather photos, quotes, fabrics, and colors that represent this version of you. A physical board can go in your room or closet. It can even be a mini collage you can put on your driver's side mirror in your car. The goal is to see your dream girl's life as real and achievable.
Setting New Year Goals
Your dream girl's life needs structure, so let's break down goals into categories and map out the steps to make it happen.
Categorize Your Goals: List your goals under personal growth, style & beauty, health & wellness, and career & financial. For example, under "Health & Wellness", you might set a goal to try Pilates or to cook more at home.
Monthly Check-Ins: As you go through the year, check in with your goals to celebrate your wins, and adjust as needed. This keeps your transformation on track.
Mindset Makeover
Confidence & Self-Worth
Your dream girl is confident, magnetic, and knows her worth. Let's build those habits and thoughts that help you embody that energy daily.
Positive Affirmations: Every time you look in the mirror, say things like "I am worth everything good that can happen to me" or any affirmation that you feel suits you best.
Confidence Rituals: Small, daily actions add up to huge shifts in confidence. Make it a habit to dress up on casual days, speak kindly to yourself, and embrace good posture.
Let Go of Insecurities: Identify any insecurities and practice reframing them. Instead of "I wish I was more confident", say "I am becoming more confident every day". Over time, you'll notice how these subtle shifts impact your self-worth.
Mindset for Success
Your dream girl is resilient and always growing, so let's make success part of your mindset.
Growth Mindset: View challenges as chances to learn, whether it's a career move, a new hobby, or even a social situation.
Visualizing Success: Each morning, spend a few minutes visualizing yourself living your dream life. This will keep you focused and motivated.
Morning & Evening Routines: Start each day with intention by setting small goals and expressing gratitude. At night, reflect on the day and celebrate your wins; even the small ones.
Social Life & Relationships
Social confidence comes from feeling at ease in your own skin.
Elegant Etiquette: Show appreciation with thank you notes, and make an effort to remember names. The vibe for 2025 is to go for traditional, rather than modern. Think classic early 1920's-1950's Hollywood.
Curate Your Circle: Surround yourself with supportive, inspiring friends who uplift you. Leave the ones who don't elevate themselves or try to keep you behind.
Networking Lifestyle: Turn social gatherings into chances to meet like-minded people and to elevate your circle.
(Dating) Standards First: Don't settle; know what you deserve in a partner and communicate it confidently.
(Dating) Playful Energy: Be confident, flirty, and assertive (with yourself, not them). Stay in your feminine energy and let them earn your time and attention.
(Dating) Relationship Goals: Keep dates special and playful. Dress up, go out, and enjoy yourself.
Finances & Career Goals
Your dream girl values luxury, but also financial security. Your career is part of your dream girl identity, so elevate it.
Budgeting: Set aside money for luxuries and self-investment, but keep savings in mind.
Multiple Income Streams: Consider side hustles that align with your lifestyle.
Savings Goals: Whether it's for a designer bag, a trip, or just building wealth, make sure your goals are concrete.
Luxury Workspace: Make your workspace a vibe with candles, flowers, and chic decor.
Network for Success: Connect with mentors and people who inspire you.
Grow with Intention: Set milestones in your career or business, and keep pushing for the next level.
Health & Wellness
Your body is the vessel of your dream girl, so let's treat it with love and care. Mental clarity and peace are essential for dream girl energy; so let's focus on overall wellness this year.
Exercise: Try Pilates or Barre classes for a toned, elegant look. If that's not your thing, find workouts that create your dream body.
Healthy Eating: Focus on whole foods, lots of veggies, and drink tons of water.
Weekly Reset: Plan a mini detox day where you relax, hydrate, and reset for the week.
Mindfulness Practice: Try a short meditation or breathing exercise every morning.
Stress Relief: Whether it's a quick walk, journaling, or a creative outlet, find a stress relief that's all you.
Boundaries: Say no when needed, and make sure your energy is protected.
Beauty & Style Upgrade
First, a dream girl has that glow, and it all starts with a skincare routine that feels luxurious. You also need to find a style that captures your dream girl vibe, and commit to curating it. Then, you need to develop habits that will help you better your appearance.
Simple Skincare Routine (For Starters): Start with a cleanser for your skin type, followed by a hydrating toner, a serum (like Vitamin C for brightness), moisturizer, and SPF.
Luxury Treatments: Invest in facials or try gentle at-home treatments like dermaplaning once a month for an extra glow.
Nightly Routine: Keep your skin hydrated at night with a heavier moisturizer or an overnight mask.
Personal Style Icons: Think of someone like Serena van der Woodsen from Gossip Girl or a high-fashion model off-duty.
Curating Your Wardrobe: Focus on high-quality staples in neutral tones, like blazers, silky blouses, and tailored bottoms. Invest in timeless pieces that make you feel like a billion dollars.
Signature Look: A dream girl has her thing, whether it's an accessory, a makeup look, or a scent. Find what makes you feel like you and stick with it.
Self-Care Rituals: Prioritize manicures and pedicures, hair masks, and bubble baths. Set aside time every week to pamper yourself.
Polished Look: Even on your most casual days, aim to look put together.
Signature Hair & Makeup: Pick a go-to glam look that embodies your dream girl; maybe that's glossy lips and loose waves (for example).
Lifestyle & Daily Habits
Your routine should feel luxurious yet practical, setting the tone for each day. Small daily habits can transform how you feel and present yourself.
Weekly Pamper Sessions: Set aside Sunday evenings for facials, skincare, and champagne baths! (Be careful and make sure you're of legal drinking age)
Journaling and Reflection: Each morning, write down 3 things you're grateful for and 3 intentions for the day.
Goal Reviews: Every Sunday, celebrate your wins and see if any goals need a refresh.
The Basic Routine: Make your bed, wake up early, and put on an outfit that feels like you.
Energy-Boosting Habits: A quick stretch, a healthy breakfast, and a moment of quiet can make a huge difference.
Wind-Down Ritual: At night, unwind with tea, a bubble bath, or a short meditation to recharge for tomorrow.
Indulge a Little: Get a weekly coffee treat or a luxurious candle that makes your space feel cozy.
Luxury Experiences: Plan for a special outing every month, like a fancy dinner or spa day.
Signature Scents and Cocktails: Find your go-to perfume and a signature drink like a dirty martini or a bubbly glass of champagne.
Conclusion:
Becoming your dream girl is a journey; one that's glamorous, fulfilling, and full of growth. Each step brings you closer to living the life you deserve.
#leveling up#leveling up tips#level up journey#level up tips#leveling up journey#level up#levelling up#high value mindset#high value dating#high standards#high maintenance#high value woman#that girl#self care#personal development#hypergamy#femininity#hypergamous#hyperfeminine#hyperfemininity#hyper feminine#self development#self image#self help#self improvement#self worth#luxury lifestyle#luxury living#luxury#feminine journey
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Oooh yay!! I'm so excited to dive into your thoughts, friend! 😜💜
I LOVE that you have notes! You spoil me. 🥰
Controlled breathing was necessary. But also, I feel like there were some great layers here. Dean allowing himself to feel good? And not just for one night. Admitting it and actually pursuing more? Yessssss. He deserves that.
*breath in, breathe out* loll
Aww thank you for that observation! Dean's finally acknowledging and breaking down those barriers within himself for "something good." 💗
Him sleeping better with her next to him--a classic. Never gets old. <3
Exactly, that's how I feel! 🥹 (We both know I'm a sap lol)
This whole paragraph was beautiful. Also, it was a moment where, if someone simply handed it to me with no other context, I would know it was yours. It felt like you.
The way you just gripped my heart tight and gave me the warm fuzzies. 🥹🥹 "It felt like you." What an amazing compliment! Thank you, my friend. 💕
Her rings being such an identifier was a great detail that fit so well with the reveal at the end. Smart, smart writing!
Aw I'm glad you liked that! That came over from Maybe More Than Enough. I just like the idea of her having silver rings as a fashion statement, a habit, and a good hunter tidbit all in one. 💜
Loved this! Definitely have had something similar in my head while daydreaming. A little sassy, but mostly lovingly concerned. (Again, so very you.)
It's his grouchy little face -- you just wanna smooth out those frowny lines. 😂😂 Aww thank you! Sassy, but mostly lovingly concerned is how I feel like I'd try to be with him. 💗
My stomach was doing something different this time. LMAO. The end of the first section--how he still had questions but just decided to trust her and her judgment. Brilliant. And proved that he really is ready for more.
LMAO I do not blame you on that one. 🤣
Aw Dean. It's mostly that he trusts her, but I feel like it's also a little bit of him "not wanting to look needy," asking too many questions about where she's been. Even if it's both, it's still a sign that he cares and he wants to be there for her regardless.
And in that first section, I simply could not figure out what she was off doing or what it meant for them. The reveal was as satisfying as the guessing. That might actually be my favorite part of this piece--the fact that I could not figure out where it was going. But also, she spent her early morning baking him a pie? My heart got gooier than its filling! =']
Ahaha honestly I feel accomplished that I managed to stump you at first! I threw in a couple of really tiny hints, but I hoped that the reveal would be surprising and satisfying enough, so I'm very glad you think so! She really did spend half the night and the early morning prepping that damn pie for him! 😂
And it just got better from there. He forgot his own birthday? OUCH. His emotion over her gesture? Love, love, love. And their use of touch? So tender and sweet. So, yeah, I was a fan of this one. xD<3
He really did in this one! Like, I feel like the brothers don't make a big deal about birthdays as well as holidays, so with everything they always have going on, HC that Dean forgets his own birthday half the time in the later seasons. I felt like her doing this for him would be a small but significant way of her showing that she's "all in."
Thank you again SO much for your lovely comments and observations!! You totally made my day, Larrs. 💕💕
It's not his birthday yet IRL, but we're celebrating it a bit early in this story. 😂
Restless Nights
Pairing: Dean Winchester x F. Reader
Summary: After a tryst you instigated in the backseat of his Baby, you and Dean have started something new. He’s just not sure that you’re as “all in” as you claimed to be.
AN: As promised, here's a bonus one-shot to follow Maybe More Than Enough, though it can be read as a stand-alone. This is based on a request from @lacilou, one of my lovely Patreon members!
Bonus! It fulfills the @spnfanficpond monthly prompt. (Can’t give it away until the end though!)
Request: A Dean story based on the song “I Remember You” by Skid Row.
Word Count: 1.2K
Tags/Warnings: Angst, fluff, implied mentions of sex, bit of a twist ending…
Dean woke to the sound of pouring rain hitting the roof of the bunker.
It must’ve been some torrential downpour, because it took a lot for him to hear anything of the outside world from inside this place. Good thing the old heaters kept out the January cold, too. Nothing worse than frigid rain.
Blearily he cracked his eyes open, unearthed an arm from where it was tucked under his pillow, and carefully raised his phone to check the time, trying not to let the light from the screen burn his retinas in the still dark room.
4:00 a.m.
He groaned. Goddamn it.
He turned over onto his other side to face where you should’ve been lying next to him. He frowned when he saw nothing but the sheets pulled back and a dented, empty pillow.
No matter how he fought it down, a small tinge of worry, and the beginnings of disappointment churned in his gut. His brows furrowed.
Did you regret it already?
After his first make out session with you (turned more session) in the backseat of his Baby, you two struck a tentative agreement to figure what this could be—more than hunting partners, allies, and friends. Despite the fact that you kissed him first (a fact he didn’t easily let you forget), afterwards, you’d been a little hesitant about what came next.
“We take it day by day,” he’d told you, with a sizzling kiss that stole your breath. “All I know is…this feels good.”
It felt right. You had definitely agreed with that.
Dean sighed through his nose, turning back onto his other side. It wasn’t unusual for him to be a light (restless) sleeper, but the handful of times you’d joined him in his bed had been beginning to make his nights calmer. He was actually starting to sleep through until morning.
What’s more, after years of looking into your eyes and seeing all the possibilities of what if, he was finally getting to make those images solid, and real. He could touch them, taste them, feel them under his calloused hands. He finally had you for real.
He looked past your empty spot in his bed and didn’t see your phone, or any of your rings on the nightstand. They were the first things you put on in the morning, and the last things you took off at night.
If those were gone…
His disappointment was settling high in his chest now; an ache approaching pain.
Until he heard the light sound of bare feet padding back toward the bed. Your hand slid gently up his arm, and after the surprise wore off, the corners of his lips tugged upwards. Your hair was a bit wild and frizzy. It tickled his neck and shoulder when you leaned in to kiss his cheek.
“What’s this?” you whispered, swiping two fingers between the crunch in his brows. Dean relaxed with a small smile.
“Nothin’,” he claimed. His voice was deep and rough with sleep. “Had an appointment to get to or something?”
You smiled and settled into bed, embracing him from behind. He turned onto his back and welcomed you over, with an arm curling around your waist. He rested his hand on yours when it smoothed across his chest.
Subtly glancing down, he didn’t find any of the silver you wore on the daily, including the ring with a small turquoise stone he’d bought you a couple weeks ago, on a hunt in Denver. That one, you now almost never took off.
“I put them away in a drawer,” you said, wiggling your fingers under his hand. Your hand felt dry, and a little like you'd been handling something dusty. Had you been up reading in the library again, lost track of time? “When I woke up, I saw one fell off the nightstand. Have a feeling it had something to do with the bedframe knocking against it.”
At that, Dean couldn’t contain his lazy smirk.
“My bad,” he said, sounding anything but sorry.
You laughed, shaking your head. You still laid a kiss below his shoulder before you settled back down. He gave your waist a gentle squeeze, pressing a kiss of his own to your forehead. A deep breath fell from between his lips, and his eyes closed.
A question was on the tip of his tongue. Where you were, why you got up. Was it something he could help with? Or was it one of those moments you needed to have alone, not unlike the times you gave him to settle with his thoughts, after a hunt gone sideways. If it was important, you’d level with him, wouldn’t you?
So he let it be.
In the morning, you somehow once again managed to get out of bed without him feeling it. He didn’t hear you either. Curiosity led him down the hall and glancing inside the cracked door of Sam’s room. It was empty, his running shoes gone from the side of his bed. Dean rolled his eyes.
All right, Lance.
Oh, wait, that was biking. …Whatever.
Dean’s next path inevitably took him down to the kitchen. His stomach was already percolating—in need of good coffee and (hopefully) good food.
The smell wafting from the kitchen surprised him, however. Cinnamon apples?
He turned the corner, and there he found you.
The fuck?
You looked a bit of a mess. Your hair was thrown up into a haphazard bun, and you’d stolen his apron. Though in his eyes, you made it look better, the white fabric hugging around your curves like you were Rachel Ray or something. You were frazzled when he came downstairs, but happy to see him. You beckoned him over and sat him down at the small kitchen table.
“Sweetheart, what’s going on here?” he asked, eying you curiously.
“Just stay there!” you called from the kitchen. He heard you opening the oven, cursing when you nearly dropped something.
What the hell were you doing baking before 9:00 a.m.?
He turned to ask you what was going on (and if you needed help), but before the words could come out of his mouth, you came over and carefully set down the pie in front of him. The rich aroma, the golden flaky crust, the flecks of cinnamon and glossy apples peeking out from the divots in said crust—it all had Dean’s mouth watering, and his shocked gaze fixed on the shiny pastry.
He startled a little when he felt your hands on his shoulders, sliding part of the way down his arms. You kissed the side of his head.
“Thought I wouldn’t remember, did you?” you teased. “Happy Birthday, baby.”
Dean’s throat constricted. He tried not to show it, but your gaze gentled when he finally met yours, like you were seeing through all his layers anyway. He realized then what you were probably working on last night, and he really couldn’t fucking believe it.
He’d forgotten his own birthday. Couldn’t see much use in celebrating, when year after crappy year…
But he closed a hand over yours on his shoulder, and he brought your hand to his lips.
Every word he couldn’t yet say to you was etched in that single gesture.
AN: Short and angsty sweet! lol And the monthly prompt was "pie!" 🥧 For Dean of course. 😂
Hope you guys enjoy this one! 💜
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Hey I loved the bachelorette party in Malibu for Lonley series but can u do one where Harry has a bachelor party and yn stuck at home please I’m obbsed 😂💕
Hiii lovey!!! I’m glad you enjoy the series!!! I hope you like this, it was fun to write because the difference in how the two of them handle time away from each other is very funny😂💖
Find all things Lonely series here✨
CW: Language and mentions of drinking
Tag List: @blckburd @fangirl509east @ell0ra-br3kk3r @youngpastafanmug @mattieshattuck1
A/N: Harry is away for his bachelor party weekend while you’re at home and you get a surprise visitor, enjoy drunk Harry as well as some classic bestie banter✨
You let out a sigh of content as you get comfortable on the couch before bringing your coffee mug up to your lips so you can take a sip, the house is quiet minus the gentle humming sound of the ice maker in the kitchen and the air conditioning that kicks on every now and then and you can’t help but sit there and enjoy the peacefulness of the quiet, at least while you can. You look at the clock on the wall in the kitchen and know that Harry should be landing in Vegas soon, Gemma having booked a morning flight so she could get in a few hours at the spa and a well timed nap before the nighttime festivities begin, most of which you have no idea about minus one little detail but that’s only because she drunkenly let it slip during your bachelorette trip a month ago.
You smile at the thought of Harry being surprised with a spa day, something you know he enjoys and will help him relax and the more relaxed he gets the more fun he will have as the evening goes on. That’s the thing with this weekend, you truly want Harry to have fun because he’s been spending way too much time fussing over you and the upcoming wedding recently that a night out without anything or anyone to worry about is what he deserves. And even though you had to practically drag him down the front steps to the car that was taking him to the airport this morning because he was “gonna miss you too much” and almost bought you a ticket on the spot to join him in Vegas, you know he’s going to end up having a good time.
You take another sip of your coffee when suddenly you hear a light beeping sound signaling to you that your front gate has been opened. You raise an eyebrow as you quickly lean over and place your mug on the coffee table before standing up and heading towards the kitchen so you can look at the fancy little tablet that shows all the security cameras, something Harry made sure to show you how to use before he left since this is technically your first time alone overnight in the house since moving in together. You mentally prepare yourself to see the same black SUV you watched him leave in this morning pulling into the driveway, but when you look at the screen you scrunch your brows together and bring the tablet closer to your face to get a better look at the car.
“What the-”
“Your fuckin’ gate hates me.” You look up from the tablet in your hands as Niall walks through your front door with a duffle bag. “I type in the code it gets all mad and beeps at me so then I type it in again and then it flashes red at me. So then I do it a third-why the bloody hell you got that thing so close to your face? You going blind or somethin?” He stops in the doorway of the kitchen with a slight look of concern on his face as his eyes land on you standing in the middle of the kitchen still holding the tablet a few inches from your face trying to see if that really is Niall’s car in your driveway or not.
“What are you doing here?” You watch him roll his eyes as he walks through the kitchen and into the living room where he drops his duffle bag down behind the couch.
“I live here.” Is all he says as he heads back into the kitchen and grabs himself a mug before going to the coffee pot. You just place the tablet back down onto the counter as you watch Niall make his way around the kitchen while making his coffee.
“Does my fiancé know that?” You ask with a hint of playfulness because you know Harry would have a field day if he heard Niall tell you he lived here, having reached a whole new level of jealousy ever since the two of you got engaged when it comes to your friendship with Niall.
“Oh what that lanky lad doesn’t know won’t hurt him. Besides it’s just for the weekend because I know he’s gone and you’ve never been alone here before so figured you could use the company.” You know he’s leaving something out as he gives his coffee a good stir before taking a sip of it all while looking everywhere but at you in the process.
“You didn’t get invited did you?” Niall’s face drops as he places his mug on the counter and lets out a sad dramatic sigh making you have to hold back a laugh.
“No.” He says with a groan. “Gem said she didn’t wanna risk Harry not having as good of a time with me there because he might be worried I’d run off and tell you everything but we both know that’s a load of bull because the man is gonna end up drunk off his ass by ten tonight and callin you up and telling on his own fucking self.” You put a hand over your mouth to try to hide your laughter but it’s no use because Niall just rolls his eyes as he grabs his mug and heads towards the living room.
“So you decided coming over here for the weekend was the best alternative?” You question as you follow him into the living room. He just shrugs as he sits down on the couch, placing an arm on the back of it so you can sit next to him and lean into his side for a little cuddle that you know he needs more than you do in this very moment.
“I figured no use in both of us being home alone when we could just be in your house together eating all Harry’s snacks and watching trashy telly.” You smile and you rest your head on Niall’s shoulder as he brings his mug up to his lips. “This coffee is gonna keep me awake for a week you absolute caffeine fiend.” He teases before taking another sip. “Tastes good though.” He mumbles as you reach for the remote so you can turn the tv on allowing the two of you to start your day of watching horrible reality television.
“If she picks him then it proves she’s just after his money because it’s clear she doesn’t even like him she just tolerates him.” You huff as you cross your arms over your chest in annoyance making Niall let out a laugh from the kitchen.
The two of you have spent the day and a good portion of the evening watching some dating show and only have one episode left so Niall decided it was only fitting he make some cocktails to go with watching the finale and honestly having put up with the dramatics of the show and watching the main woman send home people the two of you thought were decent catches has made him need a drink or two. He is in the middle of squeezing a lime into your glass when he hears the sound of something vibrating against the marble of your kitchen counter, he raises an eyebrow when he notices your phone sitting there plugged into a charger near the coffee maker. Now Niall has been your bestfriend for quite a while, so he’s no stranger to checking your phone for you so he doesn’t think twice before he’s drying his hands off and walking over to see who’s messaging you but what he sees on your lock screen makes his eyes go wide.
“You have forty six unread-sorry now it’s forty seven unread texts? What the hell? Oh fuck now it’s fifty.” You let out a sigh as your head falls to the back of the couch while Niall unplugs your phone from the charge and heads into the living room with it in his hand.
“I don’t want to respond because then he’ll keep texting me and I want him to have fun and not be thinking about me.” Niall would agree that in theory your plan would work on anyone else but this is Harry you’re talking about and he knows how obsessed the man is with you and clearly based on the evidence of the amount of texts he’s sent without a single response from you, your plan is in fact not working.
“Right well I think that’s sweet and all that you want him to have fun but looking at these-uh he seems a bit stressed? Like proper freaking out.” You sit up and turn to look at Niall as he begins to read some of the texts Harry has sent and when you watch him roll his eyes you know they are probably a bit on the dramatic side. “Oh he’s totally drunk off his ass and it’s not even half past eleven.” He states as he scrolls down towards the last few messages he sent you.
“What’s he stressed-”
“And now he’s FaceTiming you.” You stand up and walk around the couch and reach for your phone but Niall just gives you a playful smirk and you instantly know what he’s about to do.
“Niall do not answer that.” You warn as you hold your hand out for him to hand you the phone but Niall just ignores you as he heads back into the kitchen and holds the phone up before he answers Harry’s FaceTime call.
“Baby-what the fuck’er you doin in my house?” Harry’s voice is low and a bit rougher than normal and you immediately know he’s working his way towards a nice buzz. “Why do you have my wife’s phone?” Niall rolls his eyes as he places your phone against the sink so he can go back to fixing the two of you some drinks.
“She’s not your wife yet mate and I’m here because that sister of yours didn’t invite me to your little weekend away so I came here to keep my bestfriend company.” You run a hand over your face as you hear Harry let out a groan at Niall’s correction of him calling you his wife.
“You don’t like spa days so you’d’ve hated it so far.” Niall sends Harry a glare as he grabs the bottle of tequila making Harry raise an eyebrow at him when he watches him pour more than a shots worth into each glass. “You tryin’a get her drunk?” He asks as you stand on the other side of the island watching Niall make your drink and making sure Harry can’t see you, at least not yet.
“You’re in the city of sin and all you’ve done is have a bloody spa day? God you’re such an eighty year old nan.” You can’t help but laugh making Niall shoot you a playful wink but that only causes Harry to let out a whine like noise because he can hear you but can’t see you which makes Niall roll his eyes. “I can’t with the sad puppy noises you’ve got to take him.” Niall says as he picks up the phone with one hand and hands it to you but with the screen still facing him. You send him a glare before you stick your tongue out at him making him laugh before he returns the gesture.
“I don’t want to see your tongue Niall-”
“Hi Harry.” You watch Harry’s face go from disgust to pure happiness in a matter of seconds when you turn the phone around allowing him to finally see your face.
“Baby I’m so happy you’re alive.” You just ignore Niall’s laugh as you make your way back into the living room to get comfortable on the couch. “You ignored me all day and s’not nice to ignore someone you love.” His voice is a mixture of playfulness and a bit of sadness as he pokes his bottom lip out in a dramatic pout.
“I wanted you to worry about having fun not about what I’m doing.” You explain as you take a moment to try to get a decent look at him through the screen but the way he has his phone in his hand all you can see is his face and a bit of the collar of his shirt. “Where are you right now?” You ask when you notice red strobe lights in the background, Harry turns his head and looks around as if he’s looking for the name of the establishment on the walls or anywhere near where he’s currently at.
“Uhm m’not sure? S’a bit dark in here but the people are very lovely.” You smile at the blush that appears on his cheeks as his eyes wonder over to something that’s going on in front of him that you can’t see.
“That’s code for the girls are topless and the tits are nice.” Niall whispers in your ear as he leans over the back of the couch to hand you your drink, you just laugh but Harry even in his half drunken state heard Niall’s little joke and sends him a glare through the screen.
“He said people so I’m assuming it’s not just girls in this club.” You explain and Niall just shrugs as he takes a sip of his drink.
“Right so the guys are brief-less and the cocks are decent.” You nearly choke on the sip of your drink that’s in your mouth at Niall’s statement making him laugh as he reaches over and rubs your back a bit. “Jesus no wonder you two are getting married. Neither of you can handle your liquor.” He teases before he heads back into the kitchen to give you and Harry a few minutes alone.
“Harry why don’t you go and enjoy yourself? You can call me in the morning if you want?” You don’t want to sound rude but you know if you don’t get him off the phone soon then odds are you’ll be on FaceTime with him for the next few hours or until Gemma notices and takes things into her own hands.
“I took s’mthing of yours to help me get through the weekend without you.” Harry admits quietly as he looks around as if to make sure no one is looking before he reaches into his suit jacket pocket, you feel your whole face get hot when he shows you what he took of yours and you silently thank your lucky stars Niall decided to go back into the kitchen. “They’ve helped so far but still miss you.” He adds as he clutches the item in his hand while staring at you through the phone.
“You are such a freak.” Harry just shrugs one shoulder and gives you a sneaky little smirk as he begins to put the object pack into his pocket.
“Tell me those aren’t your knickers he’s shoving back into this pocket like some sort of sicko.”
“M’not a sicko for having a pair of my fiancé’s-”
“Do not finish that sentence Harry Styles you are in public.” You hear a scoff come from behind you while Harry also makes a similar sounding noise making you send Niall who’s now resting his forearms on the back of the couch next to where you’re sitting, a glare over your shoulder before looking back at your phone to give Harry the same look.
“Babe he’s surrounded by bouncing boobs and swinging pricks you think anyone’s gonna give a rats ass if he’s got some worn out knickers in his sleeve?” You scrunch your nose at Niall’s choice of words regarding your undergarments making Harry chuckle.
“How’d ya know they’re worn? You been in my nightstand you wonky kneed twat?”
“You have a panty stash in your nightstand you lanky fuck?”
“And if I do? S’none of your concern you hobbit sized asshole.”
“Ya know for a family all about treat people with kindness you Styles lot sure love to be mean as fuck to the Irish fella who’s job it is to make sure your beloved future bride makes it down the aisle.”
“The bloody hell s’that ‘posed to mean?” You let out a sigh as you just sit there and let the two of them argue as you normally do, knowing that eventually you’ll have to step in but for right now it hasn’t reached the level of any serious feelings getting hurt. Harry’s eyes are a light shade of red and his cheeks are pink letting you know his drinks are starting to catch up to him.
“It means that you overgrown toddler of a man best start being nicer to me or I might just have her accidentally get lost on the way to the venue or better yet just let her sleep in and be so late you’ll have to cancel the whole thing and reschedule it for next-”
“Okay that’s enough.” You snap when you see Harry’s eyes start to get watery as Niall’s threat starts to sink into Harry’s slightly alcohol clouded mind. “Niall go into the kitchen and make me a snack please.” He just lets out a huff but he does what you say because he can tell by your tone that you’re in no playing mood and besides he is starting to feel a bit hungry himself.
“I don’t want to reschedule.” You feel your heart sink a bit at how sad Harry’s voice is as he looks at you with a frown.
“We aren’t rescheduling anything Harry he’s just being mean that’s all.” You give him a reassuring smile that just makes him nod. “I love you and I want you to go and have fun okay? Do some weird stuff and tell me all about it when you get home or if you don’t want to-”
“M’gonna call you in the morning.” He corrects you and you just smile at his face because you know he’s trying his best to look serious but he’s failing due to the corners of his mouth pulling up into a smile. “I love you so so-so fucking much even though you ignored me.” He half mumbles and you can’t help but giggle at how cute he is when he’s drunk and trying so hard to keep it together.
“I love you too.” He gives you a dimpled grin at your response. “Now go have fun or I won’t answer your call tomorrow.” You know it’s probably not nice to threaten him but you figure it’s a good way to get him to actually do what you want and by the way he rolls his eyes and lets out a huff you know it works.
“Fine I’ll go and find m’sister and have fun.” He says with a sigh while you smile and blow him a kiss before saying you love him one more time and ending the call.
“Has he always been so damn needy?” Niall asks as you walk into the kitchen with your drink in your hand. You just shrug as you take a sip while you take a seat on one of the barstools at the kitchen island so you can watch Niall cook, he decided a proper meal was what the two of you needed not just a lousy snack since there’s still a dating show finale to watch.
“I don’t know but I also don’t mind.” You answer with a smile making Niall quirk a brow at you as he stirs in the cheese sauce for the Mac and cheese. “I’m happy to be the one he needs.” And it’s the truth because while Harry might be overly clingy and a tad bit more needy than he normally was when the two of you were just friends, you love being the one he wants to cling to and feels the urge to be needy with because it shows the shift that’s taken place and how in love with you he actually is.
#lonely series#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles series#harry styles imagine#harry styles blurb#harry styles one shot#harry styles request#harry styles drabble#harry styles fluff#harry styles angst#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n#harry styles fic#harry styles fanfic#harry styles x you#harry styles x fem!reader#harry styles x wife!reader#Harry styles friends to lovers#one direction fanfiction#friends to lovers#my little lanky baby#my little irish marshmallow#harry styles#niall horan#one direction series#boyfriend!harry#bestfriend!niall
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I kinda like the small yet big detail in the game, like I'm sure myself and some other people were expecting a wholesome dating sim that would also get quite spicy (FROM HOW WE KNOW MERU)
And we all just kinda got kicked in the butt, like Starling being too hot to be true yet so terrifying at the same time, but not the terrifying kind that we know, like Micah or Silas etc
More like the type that makes you forget that he still is more a siren than a merman, like he successfully managed to lure in the whole community with his hot ass😭😭and then we get backstabbed by him munching our fingers off as if they're some carrots, like as a simple lunch snack-💀💀
Or in the other ending where it's basically simply Mae dying and getting turned into a possession and probably just another body to fill up with tongues
From my interpretation, Starling doesn't really have that kind of romantic interest in Mae, but she kinda thought it could go into that direction, but then got stabbed in the back like that😭😭(probs everyone who played it, thought like Mae there too kinda💀so we all got the betrayal🙁)
And you guys did a really good job in simply catching us all off guard in most scenes, it's it's beautifully written and drawn, I love that game so much!!!
Spoilers for the game
Honestly maybe Sel would give a different answer but I do think Starling likes Maelyn. Due to his past and what he has now become his way of showing it is probably different, but for Starling I don't think Maelyn is just another body for storing tongues. If that was the case he wouldn't have went out of his way to clean her body up, find a wedding dress and "marry" her in his own makeshift way.
He probably didn't even view it as a betrayal. Because until the very end Starling was making sure the no longer breathing Maelyn could be comfortable in her pearl necklace.
For the writing style, probably Sel writing the story played a big part in this.
Sel and I have very similar tastes in a lot of things, on levels I myself can't believe sometimes. But we do have a different style at how we depict similar concepts.
I love presenting dark stories on a silver platter. Prettied up with the most delicious icings and shiniest sprinkles. I like my stories and characters to look beautiful. Enjoy them while thinking you're just having whimsy adventures only to realize you're done for once you truly look. Like Silas. It's easy to make fun of him, forget the things he is capable of doing as you're too busy enjoying his silliness. He feels safe, a gentle giant who loves and takes care of you.
But he's still a man who has forced himself on you not only physically but also mentally. Trapped and limited you beyond belief. No electricity, no internet, no contact with anyone other than him. Only talking to him, only feeling him, only knowing him, only consuming him. A beautiful and sweet man no human mind can handle for more than a few weeks.
But Sel, from what I've seen, is a bit different. She doesn't shy away from showing the darkness and scariness of the stories she makes. Before you even know it you'll be facing concepts you didn't think could be possible.
And not only that, she hides so much under every word she uses. Often times the things she places in front of you are not even the scariest parts. The more you read and the more you decipher they get deeper.
I'm frankly a big fan of the things she writes. They often leave me flabbergasted (and mortified, she knows what I mean) but they are also so so fun. So scary yet beautifully poetic.
I know she doesn't like being under the spotlight that much. But ever since I met her and saw her stories I wanted more people to get the chance to see and appreciate them the way they deserved. I think they are truly special, and they make me want to do my best to illustrate them in the perfect way possible.
Honestly I'm not sure if I'm good enough at it, but if it helps the stories reach more people I'm happy with it.
I don't know if she'll read this post so that's why I'm being sappy like this but I genuinely hope you guys like her stories like I do. And I hope both you and I can see more and more of it.
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takin’ what’s not yours (ford x reader x stan)
chapter 1
tags: pre portal, hurt/comfort, angst, Stan & Ford needs a hug, reader too, emotional manipulation, everyone needs therapy but that’s not happening, mystery trio dynamics if you squint, billford?? hmmm
author note: guys i swear this was supposed to be a shameless porn threesome fic, but then Ford and Stan showed up with a whole suitcase of unresolved issues im so sorry
“You’re gonna change the world, Ford.”
“Only if you’re there to see it.”
***
Backsmore University. What a fucking place.
It wasn’t just the old brick buildings or the ivy creeping up the sides. Not really. It was the people. The crazy mix of the smartest, weirdest people you could imagine. You were one of them, no doubt. An absolute nerd with a lab coat on 90% of the time, a mess of papers and equations in your backpack and a head full of ideas and knowledge. But unlike Ford, you weren’t shy about showing it. You thrived in it, honestly. Lectures? Boring as hell, but the energy in the halls? The potential of every single person you met? Yeah, you were there for it.
One of these was Ford Filbrick Pines.
The ultimate BMU enigma, the textbook definition of nerdy. For some reason, his persona always made you think he was hiding some secret genius-level insanity behind his weirdly serious face.
You’d laugh about it with your friends, the way he avoided talking to anyone. Classic “genius who’s too good for people” type.
He was everywhere, and yet, nowhere at all. Seriously, you could walk through the student lounge, see him hunched over a pile of research papers in the corner and just know you were witnessing something profound. He didn’t get what you were about at first.
You were funny, obnoxious even, always the first to crack a joke or make a ridiculous observation in class. Meanwhile Ford would just stare at you with those big eyes like he was trying to figure out if you were some kind of social experiment.
But then you started talking, typical nerds topics. About quantum physics, mathematics, about the mysteries of the universe, about everything. He’d scoff at how crazy your ideas were but then, just a second later, he'd be scribbling down some insane theory of his own that he wouldn’t even tell anyone else about. And you’d get it. You both would sit in the library, trading theories and arguing about the tiniest details of space-time.
You were the loud one, in Ford’s opinion, the one who could hold a conversation about quantum theory and drag Ford to a campus party all in the same breath. He’d grumble the whole way, saying it was a waste of time, rolling his eyes at your insistence that he needed a little break. He’d follow you through those sticky, badly lit student lounges, watching you laugh with people he’d probably never even look at twice.
These late nights when you’d drag him out to stargaze, pointing out constellations, half-naming stars you didn’t know, laughing when he’d shake his head, muttering about inaccurate astronomy. But he always went along with it, always ended up laying beside you on the grass, looking up at a sky he could never quite make sense of but was desperate to understand.
The graduation day. You clearly remember that one.
The sun was so bright you could barely keep your eyes open and everything felt like a dream. You had your cap crooked on your head (you were probably running late, as usual), your tassel swinging as you walked across the field, your friends beside you, shouting and celebrating like you were all in the fucking “after party of the year.” But then you turned and your eyes saw Ford, who was clutching that damn diploma like it was a golden ticket. He looked different somehow, like he’d finally unlocked a new version of himself.
The Stanford Pines himself, recipient of Backsmore’s largest grant for his “eccentric” research, standing with his square academic cap, although it was comically slipping off his head. He looked out of place, like a scientist among a sea of partying students who could barely remember their names half the time.
So, you did what any good friend would do— you adjusted his cap for him, (plus you wanted an excuse to touch him), made some dumb joke about how he’d better not screw it up. He’d roll his eyes, but you knew he liked it. He needed it.
“Hey,” you grinned, “looking pretty fancy for someone who spends all their time talking to aliens or whatever.”
Ford smirked. “I’ve already got a date with a space-time continuum. But you can join if you want.”
You rolled your eyes, but the smile didn’t leave.
***
Outside, the world has turned into a kind of cold, quiet hell. Snow falls in thick slow flakes, burying everything in a suffocating blanket of white. And Stan stands there, jacket pulled tight against his chest, staring up at the looming silhouette of his brother's house.
It's freezing, but Stan hardly feels the cold. Not really.
It’s quiet here, but it’s not peaceful. Silence feels heavy, like it’s watching him.
His thoughts are pulled back to a time that feels both recent and impossibly distant.
Ten years. Ten goddamn years. It’s been a decade since he's seen Ford’s face. Well, of course he doesn't expect Ford to look like something completely different, they’re twins after all. But at least now Stan knows what Ford would look like with a mullet.
Stanford was always the smart one, the golden kid, with big brains and hands that tinkered with mysteries beyond Stan’s understanding. And now. . . after all these years of silence, Ford finally decides he needs him. It’s a postcard, a single damn postcard, that drags Stan out of the muck and dumps him back here in this town, holding secrets and god knows what kind of twisted shit his brother’s got himself mixed up in.
After everything Ford did, after leaving, after barely even thinking to check in after all these years, Stan knows he shouldn't feel this way. But here he is. Waiting. Hoping. Hoping against hope, as if somehow, that tall figure would come striding down the snowy path, arms filled with books and that same serious look on his face. That same one he had as a kid when something big was on his mind.
Stan shakes his head, letting out a breath that forms a small cloud in the icy air.
“Ten years, and you drag me here for what, Stanford?” he thinks.
Stan takes a deep breath, the cold seeps right down to his bones, but it’s not the winter’s chill that makes him shiver. His heart pounds as he stares at the weathered door in front of him, trying to shake off the surge of memories of the two of them, inseparable, back when they thought the world couldn’t touch them. But that was more than a lifetime ago.
He mutters to himself, “you haven’t seen your brother in over ten years. It’s okay. He’s family. . . He won’t bite.” or at least Stan hopes so and then he knocks, half-heartedly, already bracing himself.
The door swings open with a sudden jolt. Before Stan can even greet him, Ford’s voice booms through the biting air. "WHO IS IT?! Have you come to steal my eyes?!” his trembling hands grip a crossbow, pointed directly at Stan, and the first thing Stan notices are his brother’s eyes — wide and paranoid.
Stan looks at Ford, steps back a little, blinks, then blinks again. He tries to mask the pang of hurt as he lets out a shaky laugh, “Well, I can always count on you for a warm welcome.”
Ford lowers the weapon slightly, narrowing his eyes suspiciously and then, as if finally recognizing the person standing before him, he blurts, “Stanley, did anyone follow you? Anyone at all?”
“Eh, hello to you too, pal.” Stan grumbles, but to his surprise, Ford grabs him by the clothes, yanking him roughly inside before he can even process it. "Ah!" he exclaims, stumbling forward, before the door slams shut behind them.
Ford, still skittish, shines a flashlight in Stan’s eyes, his fingers trembling as he holds it, blinding his brother. “What is this?!” Stan shoves the flashlight away.
Deep down, though, he tries to mask the pang that Ford’s mistrust strikes in him. What happened between you two? Mom would be so upset about their relationship. They used to share everything, trust each other without question, without even a word. Now here they are, stumbling through a reunion that feels like walking on broken glass.
"Sorry,” Stanford answers quickly, studying Stan’s face as if looking for lies hidden in his eyes. “I just had to make sure you weren’t. . . It’s nothing. Come in, come in.”
Stan follows him, the warmth he thought he’d feel upon seeing his brother slowly cooling into something he doesn’t want to admit that feels like disappointment. He watches Ford flit around the room, casting paranoid glances, clutching onto a battered old journal like it’s the only thing holding him together.
The shack is cluttered, papers scattered on the floor, strange devices cluttering the tables, books piled high. Wow, Stan thinks, the whole place screams my brother has been here alone too long.
It makes Stan's chest tighten.
“Uh, you gonna explain what’s going on here? you’re acting like mom after her tenth cup of coffee.” he is trying to defuse the atmosphere somehow, to make contact, but inside, his heart aches. He missed Ford; he missed him like hell. And to finally be here, standing right next to him, only to find him. . . like this. Seriously? It’s almost too much to bear.
Ford, ignoring the gentle jab, clutches the journal tighter. “Listen, there isn’t much time. I’ve made huge mistakes and I don’t know who I can trust anymore.” he doesn’t meet Stan’s eyes as he glances at a skeleton in the corner, twisting its head away from him.
Stan’s heart drops. This is bad, worse than he thought.
He steps forward, placing a hand on Ford’s shoulder, a touch he hopes can somehow bridge the miles and years between them. “Hey, easy there. Let’s talk this through, okay?”
But Ford pulls back, a strange, paranoid look in his eyes. His fingers trace the spine of the journal as he glances at Stan. “I have something to show you. Something you won’t believe.”
Stan's brow furrows, his curiosity piqued despite himself. What could it be? Some kind of super scientific bullshit that opens doors to parallel worlds? A time machine? A wormhole? Black hole made at home?
He looks at Ford, how the man hasn’t aged a day physically, but the exhaustion, the fear, the isolation, it all is painted on his brother’s face. It’s painful to see. It’s heartbreaking to think how Ford might have been living in this place, alone with nothing but his thoughts, trapped in his own world of mistakes and fears.
Stan manages a weak grin, masking his own fear for brothers sanity in his heart. "Look, I’ve been around the world, okay? Whatever it is, I’ll understand."
That twist in your chest, that awful, prickling feeling that something’s wrong.
You’re curled up at your kitchen table, sipping your tea with that kind of numbness you get when you’ve been overthinking too much. You told yourself to back off. He needed space. He needed time.
But when Stan’s eyes scan the giant, hulking portal machine in front of him, he can’t hide the bewilderment as he adds, “There’s nothing about this I understand.”
Ford’s hand wrapped tight protective around his journal. It’s the only one left, his last remaining key to understanding, to protecting everything he’s worked for.
But now Stan stands across from him and his face clearly shows something what can be called betrayal.
Ford’s been distant. Secretive, even. The last time you two spoke, it was tense, full of anger and words you didn’t mean. It shouldn’t matter, you tell yourself, but the thought of him out there, alone, is like a weight pressing down on your chest.
Ford tries to explain as if Stan would understand. “It's a trans-universal gateway, a punched hole through a weak spot in our dimension. I created it to unlock the mysteries of the universe. But it could just as easily be harnessed for terrible destruction. That's why I shut it down and hid my journals, which explain how to operate it. There's only one journal left. . . and you are the only person I can trust to take it.” he steps forward, holding the journal out to Stan, eyes pleading. “I have something to ask of you: remember our plans to sail around the world on a boat?” Stan’s face shines with smile until he hears next shit his brother say. “Take this book, get on a boat, and sail as far away as ya can! To the edge of the Earth! Bury it where no one can find it!”
I should’ve just stayed, I shouldn’t have left.
Your fingers curl around the warm mug, but sadly the heat doing nothing to soothe the anxiety creeping up your throat.
You set it down on the counter, trying to shake off the feeling. It’s just the storm, it’s just you being overdramatic. It doesn’t mean anything.
But the knot in your stomach refuses to untangle.
Something’s wrong.
“That’s it? You finally show your face after ten fucking years and all you’ve got to say is ‘get away’?”
Ford's hand drops and disappointment flashes across his face. “Stanley, you don't understand what I'm up against! What I've been through!”
“Oh, yeah?” Stan can't contain his emotions. How dare he?! “You don’t understand what I’ve been through! Three different prisons, Stanford! I’ve chewed my way out of a goddamn car trunk! Meanwhile, where have you been? Living it up in your fancy house in the woods! Selfishly hoarding your college money, because you only care about yourself!”
With a sigh, you stand up, setting the mug down on the table as your dog, a sweet, eager little spaniel, looks up at you with wide, curious eyes.
Ford's temper snaps because he can't believe what the fuck his brother is talking about. “I’m selfish? I’m selfish, Stanley? You ruined my shot at a real life! At my dream school! And here I am, giving you a chance to do something meaningful and you still can’t get it through your head!”
You glance over at your dog, a scruffy, affectionate spaniel with big brown eyes who’s been staring at you from the corner of the room.
Stan raises his eyebrows. “Yeah? You want this fucking book gone?” he yanks a lighter from his pocket, the flame flaring up as he flicks it. “Fine. I’ll get rid of it right fucking now.” he holds the journal over the flame, daring Ford to make a move.
You can’t shake this feeling, this urge to go find Ford, even if it means dragging yourself out into the goddamn blizzard.
“I’ll be back soon, girl,” you murmur, pulling on your coat. You don’t know what you’re looking for, don’t even know what you’re hoping to find. But you have to see him. You have to know
Ford’s eyes widen, panic flashing across his face. “No!” he lunges for it, reaching out, but Stan yanks it back. “You don’t understand!” Ford shouts, desperation pouring through him.
But Stan takes a step back, holding the journal dangerously close to the flame. “You want me to take it? Well, then, I’ll decide what to do with it.”
“My research!” they jerk the book back and forth, playing a fucked up game of tug of war, their yells echoing through the lab as they struggle over it.
You can’t shake the feeling, it’s like something’s dragging you forward, pulling you toward him, toward the unknown.
It’s late and the woods are fucking silent, which is weird for Gravity Falls. You’ve been running for what feels like hours, your chest burning, your mind tangled in a mess of thoughts you can’t quite shake. Every goddamn thing with Ford lately has been a disaster, hasn’t it? One fight after another, with him shutting down, disappearing into his head like he’s always been known to do.
The last words you shared with him are still fresh in your mind, “this is it, okay?! I can’t do this anymore.” he didn’t even fight back, just. . . stared at you like you were the problem. Maybe you were the problem, you don’t know, but damn it, you cared. You couldn’t just pretend like everything was fine when it clearly wasn’t. That’s why you’re out here, because you’re not about to let him get swallowed up by whatever the hell is going on in that messed-up head of his.
And now, here you are, halfway to his place with nothing but your gut telling you that whatever was going down at Ford’s place was way worse than you thought.
When you enter, you hear the kind of noise— angry, violent, something breaking and you know Ford’s involved, you just know it. You don’t care if you two haven’t spoken in days, if things between you and him are a mess of unsaid things and frustrated silences. He’s been acting so off, and now, hearing the absolute mayhem erupting inside, you’re terrified.
The sounds are loud, shouting voices, furniture crashing, angry grunts. Your heart fucking stops as you push the door open so fast it slams against the wall. You’re not thinking, not caring that maybe you shouldn’t be here, but it’s too late to stop now.
At first, you think you've completely lost your mind, because you're seeing two Ford Pines. And then you think, either you're the one who's gone crazy, or Ford has, because he's literally fighting with himself.
But as you take a breath, both Fords turn to look at you, and that’s when it hits you: this isn’t just some bizarre mirror trick. There’s Ford and then there’s someone who looks a whole lot like him, but is definitely, absolutely not him.
“What the fuck is going on?” your voice rings out much louder than you meant, but you don’t care. Your heart is pounding way too hard and your feet are planted, legs shaking with adrenaline and worry. You’ve seen Ford in a mess of emotions, but never like this. Not this bad.
The second the door slams open, both of them freeze, but it’s the mulleted guy who speaks first. “So you got yourself a chick now, huh? Thought you were too busy playing goddamn Einstein to bother with things like that.” his angry eyes narrow at you, and you’re not sure if it’s anger or. . . jealousy? Frustration? You don’t have time to decode it.
This guy have absolutely the same features, same nose, same intense, serious brow, but his whole look is just rougher, like he’d been living a life Ford would never survive.
And your blood boils.
“No, fuck that,” you snap, glaring at mullet-man. “You don’t talk about me like that.” then you glance at Ford. “Ford, why the fuck didn’t you tell me about—”
but you get interrupted by Ford’s clone, Ford’s twin, whatever. “Name’s Stan. Stanley Pines. The brother of this genius. Bet he’s never even mentioned me, huh?”
Your stomach churns at the words. Fuck that, no way. This isn’t about you, this is about Ford.
“What the fuck is wrong with you two?” now you are shivering not only from the winter cold, but also from the absolute chaos of what is happening. You turn to Ford, eyes desperate, desperate to know, to understand, to find answers. “What’s going on? Where have you been? I couldn’t get ahold of you. You just. . . left. And I—” you stop yourself, biting your lip. This isn’t the time to scream at him for all the unanswered questions, for all the shit that’s been left hanging. Not yet.
Ford doesn’t seem to get it. His eyes flick between you and Stan like he’s trying to piece it together, but nothing adds up. "I don’t— what are you doing here? We— we said goodbye," his voice is strained, like he’s trying to convince himself.
“No, Ford. You said goodbye! You fucking disappeared! I don’t even know why, and I— fuck, just explain yourself, okay?” you can’t keep the desperation out of your voice anymore.
Stan is watching with his arms crossed over his chest, and he still doesn't look too pleased, but it's not just anger. Although you don't have time to deal with his point of view. You need answers. You need Ford to talk.
Ford opens his mouth to say something, but then the anger, the frustration, all of it just snaps. "I didn’t want you involved in this. . . anyone involved. This, this thing with the portal, you wouldn’t understand—"
You don’t even let him finish. “Stop. Just stop, yeah? You don’t get to just disappear like that, Ford. I don’t care about the journal or the goddamn portal anymore. I care about you. Why the hell are you so fucking determined to push everyone away?”
Ford tries to get himself together, though he looks like he’s been caught with every secret he’s ever buried. “This— this doesn’t concern you, alright? Just— just leave, go, this is between me and him.”
Stan scoffs. “Oh, yeah, classy, Sixer. Let’s bring her in just to shove her right back out, huh? Really hitting your all-time high here.”
“Shut up,” his brother snaps.
But Stan’s just as stubborn, glaring right back. “No, I don’t think I will. Not when you’ve dragged some poor girl into this whole shitshow. Real nice, by the way, real nice! Does she even know what you’ve been up to, huh? All the crap you’re into?”
“I said shut up, Stanley. I shouldn’t have called you— God, I regret calling you! You’re just here to make things worse, like always.”
The words land harder than you thought they would. It's not like you didn’t know Ford could be an asshole, but hearing him say that directly to his brother hits a nerve, like a punch to the gut.
You see Stan’s face change, his mouth drops open, his eyes so wide, like he’s been slapped across the face. He looks like he’s been gutted. It takes his breath away, because he didn't expect to hear this ten years later, and it's obvious that Ford's words hit him too deeply.
However, your own heart drop to your stomach too. Fuck. You didn’t know what was worse — the fact that they were tearing into each other or the fact that Ford could say something like that to his own brother. It’s too much, even for you. You want to scream at Ford, demand that he stop, that this isn’t helping anyone, but you’re paralyzed.
But Stan’s hurt turns into something else and he spits back, “You think I wanted this, Ford?! You think I wanted to be the fuck-up brother?! You’re the one who dragged me into this whole goddamn mess now. You asked me to come! You! So don’t go acting all high and mighty like I’m the one screwing your life up right now!”
And then, in that moment, everything goes to hell.
Before you know it, they’re back at each other’s throats. Ford lunges forward, grabbing the journal, but Stan’s not letting go, the damn thing passed back and forth between them like it’s a live wire, all anger and resentment boiled down to this one book as each of them trying to get a hand on it.
You rush forward, hands outstretched to push them apart, anything to stop this from going too far, but in the heat of it all, Ford jerks back, elbow flying and you feel it land in your ribs, knocking the wind right out of you and it really fucking hurts. The pain shocks you so hard you gasp.
Ford’s eyes snap to you instantly, widening in horror. “Oh my god— I’m s-so sorry! are you alri—“ he reaches toward you, himself can’t believe he just did that to you, but he barely gets a word out before Stan’s fist slams into his jaw.
This time, Stan hits so hard, putting all his resentment into the punch that Ford stumbles dangerously close to the portal, which is buzzing. You watch in absolute horror as his body goes too close, the fucking thing flickering and humming like a beast about to devour him whole and for a heart-stopping second, Ford looks like he’s going to fall right in.
You’re out of your mind in an instant as you scramble to your feet, adrenaline spiking, crazy fear in your eyes. Without thinking, you reach out, grabbing Ford’s arm, pulling him back, using every ounce of strength you have to pull him back. “Ford, no! Get back!”
Stan’s standing there, frozen for a second, scared himself by how far he had come. His chest rises and falls in heavy breaths and his face is fucking pale as he stares at his brother’s body half in portal, but the guilt is written all over Stan’s face. His bruised hand is still raised, like he wants to hit Ford again, but it’s shaking. Did he. . . did he just. . ? God, he didn’t mean—
“You!” you scream, still tugging Ford away from the edge, but the portal’s pulling like a magnet and you’re fighting with everything you have. “Help me, now!”
Snapped out of his daze, Stanley rushes over, grabbing Ford. You tug harder, your muscles screaming as Ford’s body gives a last push toward the rift, but finally, finally, together, you both heave him back, dragging him away from the portal and out of that damn pull. His feet hit solid ground and you both just collapse.
You’re gasping for breath, hands still fisted in Ford’s coat, both of you holding on like if you let go, he’ll slip right back toward that nightmare.
Ford’s breathing heavily, disoriented, his hands gripping your arms in fear.
Stan’s still looking at Ford, his face torn up because he doesn’t know whether to say sorry, to yell or to just walk the fuck out to not ruin something else. There’s realisation in his eyes and, for the first time, Stanley is seeing what his anger’s capable of. That punch could’ve been the end of everything.
“Brother. . .” Stan’s voice trembles. “I didn’t mean to—”
You don’t let him finish. “No, you didn’t mean to. None of you meant to,” you snap, but it’s not anger in your tone, it’s damn fear, panic, it’s this deep fucking worry. You turn to Ford. “But this shit needs to stop, okay? Right now. Please.”
The silence between you, Ford and Stan stretches out as if it’s some aftermath of a bomb going off. Ford’s still on the floor, breathing hard and it’s not the near-death experience that’s fucking him up, but the bitter realisation of what could have really happened if that damn portal had taken him in.
“So that’s it, huh? After ten goddamn years, this is how you treat me? Almost shove me into a portal like it’s nothing?”
Stan opens his mouth, but Ford isn’t letting him get a word in, he’s too riled up now, all that anger and pride churning in him, boiling over. “Do you even understand what could’ve happened? What you almost did? You haven’t changed one bit, Stanley. I should’ve known better. Should’ve known you’d just fuck everything up, again. Just like you did back then.” Ford’s voice sounds colder than the winter outside. “Remember the science fair, Stan? You destroyed my experiment because you were too fucking selfish to think about anyone but yourself. I could’ve had everything. You took that from me, my chance at West Coast Tech, my chance at anything and then you have the nerve to make me the villain?”
It hits Stan harder than any punch ever could. Stan doesn’t even blink, his whole body stiff, shoulders slump.
His mouth opens like he wants to fight back, but there’s no fight left in him, the words are stuck in his throat. He doesn’t say shit, trying to process everything at once. But there’s nothing to process. Ford’s right.
“Yeah, I get it,” Stan mutters, holding back tears. “I’m a fucking failure. I know that, Sixer. Always have been. I’m sorry.”
But then he does the one thing you didn’t think he would. He turns around, slow, defeated, too fucking tired to argue and fight anymore.
And just like that, he starts walking away. But deep inside Stanley is crying like a child, expecting Ford to stop him. He doesn’t look back, doesn’t say a word, but he wishes Ford would care, at least once.
You’re fucking shocked, feeling helpless rage and anger, heart pounding with confusion and disbelief. You thought. . . well, you don’t even know what you thought! That they’d hug it out? Have some big, tearful reunion? Not really! But this mess of accusations and bitterness and old scars is so fucked up. Completely and utterly fucked up.
Ford stands there, all silent, watching Stan’s back as he walks away, not moving an inch. The pride, the stubbornness, the wall he’s built around himself. Oh god, that guy is so fucking smart he doesn’t know how to feel anymore.
You look back at Ford, at his rigid stance, he won’t even move, won’t even try to call Stan back. You can’t believe it and something snaps in you, something fierce and hot because you’re done with all this bullshit.
“You’re not even gonna ask him to stay? Fuck, what is wrong with you both?”
Ford’s face tightens, but he doesn’t respond, doesn’t even flinch. And it drives you insane, watching him cling to that pride, that goddamn logic of his that’s somehow more important than his own damn family. No fucking way is this ending like this. Not after everything you’ve just seen, not with Ford standing there like a goddamn statue, too proud or too blind or too stupid to do anything but let his brother walk out.
You storm past Ford, ignoring his surprised look as you push past him, practically running after Stan. “wait!” you shout. But Stan doesn’t stop, doesn’t even glance over his shoulder.
“Stan!”
“What?” he snaps at you.
You step closer. “You’re not leaving,” you say, staring him down like it’s a challenge.
He lets out a dry, humourless laugh, shaking his head. “Trust me, sweetheart, it’s better if I do. I don’t belong here.” he jerks his thumb back in Ford’s direction. “Pretty clear I’m not welcome.”
“Bullshit,” you respond, what makes Stanley raise an eyebrow, looking a little surprised at your bluntness. “I don’t care if he’s too proud to say it, but you’re his brother— I mean, you think this is how family’s supposed to be? You think he doesn’t want you here?”
“Look, kid, you don’t know what you’re talkin’ about. Me ‘n’ Ford? We’re a lost cause. Always been. Ain’t no point in tryin' to fix it now.”
“Oh, come on! So you fuck up, he fucks up— you’re both disasters. That doesn’t mean you just give up. I don’t care if it’s been years or what the hell happened between you two. You don’t just fuckin’ quit on family. That’s not how this works.”
Stan’s mouth twitches and he looks like he’s gonna bite back with something snarky, but he doesn’t. He just lets out this tired sigh, rubbing his hand over his face. “I don’t wanna hurt him more than I already have. I always mess things up. I’ll just make it worse. So what’s the point?”
You take a deep breath, trying to rein in the frustration pounding through you. “The point is, you’re his brother! And if you don’t stay, if you don’t try to work this out, you’ll both regret it. You can’t just leave him to deal with this shit alone.”
Stanley opens his mouth, ready to throw out another excuse, but you cut him off.
“Look, Stan,” you change the intonation to softer one, “I don’t know the whole story here. I don’t know what went down between you two and I’m sure as hell not saying it doesn’t hurt like hell. But this whole thing you guys are doing? Pushing each other away? It’s not gonna make anything better.“
“Fine, fine. But don’t expect me to be the hero, alright? I ain’t got no magic words to fix this shit.” Stan sighs and looks down like he’s too damn tired for this conversation.
When you and Stan make your way back inside, you see Ford still there with his back to you.
Stanley huffs out a laugh, trying to shake off the tension. “So, Sixer, when’d ya start collectin’ all this junk? don’t tell me you got a whole damn museum in here.”
Suddenly, Ford huffs a dry laugh that sounds a little bitter coming from someone like him. “Wouldn’t expect you to get it. Takes more than a few brain cells to appreciate real science.”
Stan’s smile falters, well, it was pretty rude, but he thinks he deserved it. You and Stan share a look, but before you can say anything, Stan just shrugs it off, letting out a forced chuckle, his voice trying to stay light. “Ha, yeah, same ol’ Ford. Ya always had a way with words, didn’t ya?”
There is only silence in response, but when you come a little closer, you finally take in the sight of Ford holding a goddamn crossbow.
Wait, what?
Your eyes go wide and the first thing that hits you is the cold sweat creeping up your spine.
Stan and you freeze. Confusion mixing with a little fear as you both look at Ford, What the hell is going on with him? Since when does Ford carry a crossbow around like it’s no big deal?
Stan raises an eyebrow, trying to lighten the mood with a joke, but the smile doesn't reach his eyes. “Hey, bro, you planning on hunting something tonight or just ready to, I dunno, take out some deer in the backyard?”
#gravity falls x reader#x reader#gravity falls#gravity falls x you#gravity falls smut#ford pines x reader#stanford pines#ford pines smut#stan pines smut#stan pines x reader#stan pines x you#ford pines x you#stanford pines x you#stanford pines x reader#stanley pines x you#stanley pines#gravity falls fanfic
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NEO TV # I LIKE ME BETTER WHEN I'M WITH YOU. (jaehyun x reader) 6/?
genre: angst, suggestive, gang au, rich kid au, enemies to lovers (kinda), a lil of fluffy stuff. slowburn, series.
warnings: drug use mentions, gangs, fights, use of weapons, adult language, illegal activities, cheating (not on the main couple), toxic family environment, addictions, manipulation, insecurities, illegal street racing, death mentions. jeno is jaehyun's younger brother, angst, smut and if I slip something my bad haha.
word count: +10k?
a/n: im the worst I KNOW! It's just i kept trying to write this chapter like a million times and it never ended like I wanted to and seeing as I have a language barrier (cuz English isn't my first language if u didn't know haha) I was just being unsatisfied with the chapter, but I force my ass to sit down and write this down so i hope u like it!
Sigh...
Overthinking.
(Y/N) had never been good at not thinking too much. Ever since she was little, she always found herself trapped in her own mind, unraveling every last detail of any situation. Perhaps it came from her mother, who had an almost supernatural ability to turn the smallest into the biggest, the most trivial into something monumental. Her mother sowed doubts where there were none, and every little imperfection became a tragedy in her house. That had marked her way of being, of perceiving the world and, especially, the people around her.
She hated it. But, despite everything, she couldn't help it.
Lying on the bed, her eyes fixed on the white ceiling, she felt how the silence enveloped her, how it pressed on her shoulders, on her chest. A heavy, unbearable silence, like a blanket that drowned her. The thoughts did not cease, on the contrary, they intensified as time progressed, dragging her more and more towards the storm raging inside her.
Five days. Five long and exasperating days.
Since the last time she saw Jaehyun. The last time he'd been at her house at one in the morning, when everything had been so... strange. So full of heavy silences, elusive looks, and something on his face, something she couldn't explain. A look she had never seen before. As if it was charged with something, with a desperation so great that he didn't know how to share it. Something that was far beyond the tension of her argument with Mark Lee. Something dark, hidden in the depths of Jaehyun, that she couldn't quite grasp.
Worst of all, now, five days later, she knew nothing about him. The unanswered calls, the messages delivered but not read. She had tried to contact him so many times, but the frustration was just overflowing her.
What was going on? The uncertainty was worse than any answer she could receive. In her mind, questions swirled like a whirlwind. Was she the cause? Had she done something that had driven him away from her? Why had he left so abruptly after their encounter?
She remembered that night. That last shared moment. It had been so... intense. So close, so intimate. An instant of shared vulnerability that had allowed her to feel that, at last, she was connecting with him in a deeper way. But then he was gone. Without a word. Without a word, without a gesture to indicate that something else might be behind his departure.
Jaehyun's words kept echoing in her mind, over and over again. "You're the one that can keep me on track."
Those words stuck to her skin like an invisible mark. What did they really mean? Was it true what he had said? Was she the one who could keep him focused? She wanted to believe it, wanted to be that person for him. But deep down, a fear was creeping in. Was she just being a distraction for him? Was she simply the release valve, the temporary relief for the anguish he was feeling, only so that later he could lose himself in his own pain again?
Knock. Knock. Knock.
She was confused, she didn't know what to do or what not to do. Should she go find him at Neo Zone? Or just wait for him to decide to show up? But, if Jaehyun decided not to... then what would she do?
Knock. Knock. Knock.
The sound of knocking on the door brought her out of her whirlwind of thoughts. She looked toward the door without moving a muscle, throat tight, stomach twisting. The last thing she wanted was to confront her mother, but the knock was persistent, as if someone had decided to break the silence of her room and force an interaction she didn't want.
But, despite the heaviness she felt inside, she got up. A slow, weary movement, as if she were walking through thick water. When she opened the door, she did not find what she expected, neither her mother, nor the inevitable argument. Instead, there he was.
"Daeho..." she murmured, her voice muffled, as if somehow his presence gave her back something she had lost in those days of constant overthinking.
It really had been a long time since they had last met face to face and to say it wasn't a surprise to her would be a total lie.
"Hey," he said, with a smile that didn't quite light up his face. "Can we just... hang?" he asked, scratching the back of his head as if it were weighing on him.
She nodded without another word, stepping aside for him to pass. As soon as he was through the door, Daeho plopped down on his bed unceremoniously, and (Y/N) mimicked him, lying down next to him quietly. They both stared at the ceiling, engulfed in the same silence that had filled their room before his arrival, though it felt somewhat less empty now.
It had been so long since they had shared a moment like this, a moment of simple companionship. She remembered the years when he had been her best friend, her inseparable companion, the only person she truly trusted within the family. But now, lying next to him, she felt as if she had a stranger by her side, someone who, despite all the shared memories, had fallen into a darkness from which she could no longer rescue him.
Daeho broke the silence, his voice soft but laden with an almost tangible weight. "How have you been?"
"I could be better," she replied, with a sincerity he understood without the need for details. He nodded, without looking at her, and went back to losing himself in the ceiling.
(Y/N) gaze strayed to him, and for the first time in a long time, she looked at him closely. His face seemed to have aged years in just a few months. His skin, paler than usual, was dotted with small imperfections that he once cared for with care. The dark circles under her eyes were deep, and her expression had an air of resignation that hurt to see. He sighed, swallowing the lump he felt in his throat.
It was ironic. The person she had grown up with, with whom she had shared so much, now felt like a stranger. She couldn't remember the exact moment when their friendship had changed, or how they got to this point. It had all happened so subtly, as if the words and gestures that had once bound them together had now lost their power. Perhaps time had eroded all that. Or maybe they simply didn't understand each other in the same way anymore.
A pang of pain shot through her. It wasn't just sadness she felt at seeing him like this, but also a pent-up rage, a helplessness that made her want to scream, to wonder at what point he had reached this point. How had he fallen so low?
Perhaps that moment had been from two years ago, when things had become a little darker in her family environment. When her aunt and uncle seemed unable to stop hurting his self-esteem again and again and again. Maybe it was since that gala when all eyes were on him, judging him, laughing at him, stalking him, waiting for him to make a simple mistake so they could point at him.
So they could tell him that he was not worthy of everything he had around him.
That he couldn't be as good as his father was.
That he was a mere spoiled child who deserved nothing.
Perhaps that was when it dawned on Daeho that he could never live up to the expectations he had to fill.
"Daeho..." she whispered, unable to keep the thought to herself alone. There was something heartbreaking about seeing how her cousin was losing himself, something that reached straight to her heart.
He closed his eyes, as if he knew what was coming, and remained silent, as if everything was in order.
"Why did we end up like this?" the question left his lips without meaning to. And as she uttered it, she felt a surge of pain run through her, as if that simple phrase was a reminder of how far away they were from each other.
Daeho closed his eyes for a few moments, as if trying to find an answer. Finally, he spoke, his voice muffled and distant.
"It's the only time I forget," he said, staring at the ceiling, not daring to look her in the eye. "When I do it, it's like I can stop thinking about everything."
"You're not forgetting," she asserted, "you're destroying yourself."
He let out a bitter laugh. "I don't think I'm doing it any more than they're destroying me," he said, his words hitting her with the force of a fist.
Silence filled the room again. She wanted to react, to scream at him, to convince him that he couldn't go on like this, but the words stuck in her throat. How to tell him that she could see him falling and could do nothing to stop it? How to make him understand that he was killing a part of himself?
"I can't keep watching you destroy yourself," he said at last, his voice trembling.
Daeho fell silent, and she felt a tide of memories rise up inside her. She remembered the years they had shared, the times when he was her refuge and she his, the days when nothing could separate them. Daeho had been more than a cousin; he had been her confidant, her best friend. To see him like this, consumed by something she could neither understand nor control, broke her heart.
"You don't have to," he replied softly, but the intensity of his words hit her hard.
(Y/N) wanted to laugh, a bitter, hurt laugh, but instead, she felt the lump in her throat grow larger.
"You said you'd quit it," she reminded him, almost in a sob.
Daeho turned his head toward her, and their eyes met for the first time that night. The look on his face was so devastated that she (Y/N) wished he hadn't looked at her.
"I can't," he admitted, his voice tinged with desperate honesty. "I've tried so many times, and each time...each time I realize I don't want to give it up. I know it's not what you want to hear, but...I'm in too deep. I don't know how to get out, even if I wanted to."
(Y/N) felt the pain in her chest become almost tangible. Seeing him like this, hearing those words, hurt in a way she could never have imagined.
"Why do things have to be like this?" she asked, feeling a lone tear fall down her cheek.
Daeho sighed, a long, exhausted sigh, and hid answer was so raw it seemed ripped from deep within him. "It's what I chose," he murmured. "It may not have been the best decision, but at least it was mine. It's the only thing I really decided for myself...without someone else telling me what to do, who to be. Even if it was for the worse."
She wanted to understand, wanted to see in his words something that would give her comfort, but she couldn't. She couldn't accept that someone who had once been so important to her had been lost like that.
"Don't let it drag you down," he said suddenly, his voice becoming firm. "I made my choices, (Y/N). But you...you have a life you can still build. I'm already too deep, but you...you have a lot ahead of you."
(Y/N) felt a mixture of anger and pain. She couldn't believe he was capable of telling her that, after all.
"You shouldn't keep seeing Jung Jaehyun," he added, in such a serious tone that it took her by surprise.
She looked at him, incredulous, the pain transforming into icy fury. "Get out of my room," he said, pointing to the door.
Daeho nodded, though not without a final sigh of resignation. "I just needed to tell you."
"Just go," she murmured, turning away from him.
He walked out quietly, leaving her in that loneliness that now seemed so much deeper, with the echo of his words echoing in the empty room.
Jaehyun knew it had been a chain of bad decisions and circumstances that had pushed him this far, but facing it was like tearing his skin off. He couldn't deny the truth: he hated everything around him, and he hated himself more than anyone else. His life, a maelstrom of regrets, had dragged him to this point, and try as he might, he could not escape that bitter mix of rage and hopelessness. Sometimes, in his darkest nights, he wished that everything would vanish into emptiness, that the weight of existing would finally disappear.
He wanted, with every fiber of his being, to close that circle.
"Ah, Jaehyun, always a pleasure to see you," Sooman said, leaning back in his chair with an icy, calculating smile, interlocking his hands with the false familiarity of one who controls the board.
Jaehyun felt the poison burn inside him. Disgust twisted his stomach, and that sneering smile of Sooman's only made his insides boil even more. He loathed the man with an intensity he could almost taste on his tongue. He faked a strained smile.
"I could say the same."
Fake it till you make it.
The thought passed fleetingly, and he tried to cling to it, but the hatred ate him.
"The last time we saw each other wasn't very pleasant," Sooman commented, dropping even more comfortably into his chair, as if enjoying the memory. Jaehyun's jaw immediately tensed. The memories of the beatings were still etched on his skin, and in his memory. Pain. Anger. Shame. All jumbled into a poisonous tangle. "That's why I want to make it up to you with a job."
Jaehyun could barely process that he was sitting there, across from Lee Sooman, listening to his offer, swallowing his disgust. He had heard everything Mark Lee had confessed, every word about the dark side of his boss that seemed to have no end. Deep down, all Jaehyun wanted was to make him pay, to see him suffer as he had seen his father, his Uncle Dong, Winwin suffer. Each of them had felt Sooman's merciless fist in their lives, and he was the last piece to fall.
Everything in him screamed to break the balance, to let the anger out. He wanted peace, but at the same time, he wanted to destroy everything.
The tension in Jaehyun's body increased. Make it up to him? The word felt like a taunt, but his voice was controlled, cold.
"What's this about?" asked Jaehyun, exhaling a sigh, as if by releasing the air he could release some of the weight in his chest.
Sooman smiled, with twisted satisfaction, and pulled his chair closer to the desk. "You see, in three weeks I have a trade. Trouble is, I don't want to, nor do I plan to, do it alone. I could take Cheol Uk with me, but I'd rather have him stay here, on this side of the pond...in case things get complicated," he explained, crossing his arms with the arrogant assurance of one who knows he controls all the strings. "And I think you'd be perfect company."
"What kind of exchange?" asked Jaehyun, though deep down he already sensed the answer.
"Weapons."
The shock of that word fell on him like a brick, a weight he couldn't shake. Jaehyun felt his body stiffen. He'd been in dangerous situations before, he'd played with fire and survived, he was a dealer in Neo Zone. But he knew that accepting that would mean crossing an invisible and final line. He would be transformed into someone even more embroiled in the chaos of the gang, with his hands stained with something he could never wash off.
It was hard to resist, but it was just as hard to accept.
"It'll be quick," Sooman continued, studying Jaehyun's every gesture like a predator watching its prey. "Just outside the city. If all goes well, it won't take more than an hour." he noticed the tension in Jaehyun's gaze, the hesitation he was struggling to keep hidden, and leaned toward him slightly. "I'm asking you because I trust you."
The words fell like a taunt. Jaehyun felt his blood boil, how his skin almost throbbed from pent up rage. His right hand clenched into a fist on his leg, trying to restrain the urge to get up and smash something, anything that would allow him to release what was burning inside him. How dare Sooman speak of trust, to pretend there was anything sincere between them? After all the damage he had sown around him?
But what choice did he have left? Deep down, Sooman's control was absolute.
"What's the pay?"
"Enough to cover six months of your friend's rehab," Sooman replied, his eyes locking on Jaehyun's, pressing right where he knew it hurt.
The mention of rehab was the final piece that fell, sealing his fate. Above all else, he needed the money. Above all else, there was someone else needing to get out of hell, and he couldn't let it drop. He closed his eyes for a moment, swallowing the pain that mingled with anger and despair.
"I'll do it."
"I knew you wouldn't fail me," Sooman replied, satisfied, with a smile that seemed tainted with venom. "You are just like your father. My trust is in you, Jaehyun."
Jaehyun nodded, feeling the knot in his chest tighten, choking him.
Fake it till you make it.
Roll on, light it up, inhale, exhale.
Roll on, inhale, exhale.
Inhale... exhale.
Inhale.
One, two... three.
Exhale.
Jaehyun coughed loudly as he passed the joint to Lucas, who with shrunken, red eyes took it in his hands without hesitation, taking a puff to hold the smoke in his lungs for a few seconds and slowly draw it out.
In front of them was the panoramic view of SM City, the prominent lights of the northern area made the southern area look small, even though from a distance they didn't seem to be so far apart... so different.
If only that were the case.
"You know you don't have to do it," Lucas muttered, exhaling one last puff of smoke before dropping the cigarette to the ground and crushing it with the toe of his shoe. His gaze, fixed on the ground, hid the trace of worry in his eyes.
Jaehyun continued to stare at the lights of the city, each bright spot fading into the distance, like the possibilities he once had and now seemed to be extinguished. His voice came out almost as a whisper, broken and strained. "It's six months of treatment, Lucas. "Winwin... Winwin has started to move his hand. It's a little acomplishment, I know. But it's a step, and I can't... I can't let that stop now." Each word was an effort, a confession that, deep down, that small breakthrough gave him a hope that felt forbidden in his life.
Lucas was silent for a few seconds, watching Jaehyun's profile, his rigid posture and the shadow of weariness in his gaze. "I thought you didn't want to do anything related to Sooman."
Jaehyun swallowed saliva. He thought so too. He had tried to escape Sooman's influence, that world that brought only destruction, but reality always caught up with him. He shoved his hands into his jacket pockets and sketched a bitter smile, one that barely disguised the lump forming in his throat.
"I thought so too, but you and Mark have said so, haven't you? If I try to do anything about it, not a week goes by before I'm found with a bullet in my head." His voice cracked in bitterness. "Tell me, what other choice do I have?"
Lucas let out a deep sigh, as if searching for the words amidst a cloud of dark thoughts. Then his voice was firm and determined. "I'll do it."
Jaehyun turned his head in surprise and looked directly at him. His eyes, reddened with fatigue and smoke, met his friend's. Then he let out a dry laugh, without a hint of mirth, and patted him on the back.
"Jaehyun." The name left Lucas' lips grimly, stopping him in his tracks. "I know we've said all our lives that the only one who had a chance of getting out of this shit was Winwin...but we know he's not the only one. Maybe I'm not smart enough, but I know you are. You could go to college, get away from all this. You're good at math, you're good at sports... You've got something out there, something worth more than I could ever have." Lucas looked at him with almost desperate seriousness. "Let me make the trade for you. You've got a lot more to lose."
His friend's words hit him like a truth he had tried to ignore. He pondered them silently, letting each one settle in his mind. He appreciated Lucas' attempt, his desperate proposal to sacrifice his own life to protect him, but he knew he could not allow it.
With an effort, he kept his voice steady, even though he felt each word plunging him deeper into his own emptiness. "I appreciate your... nobility, dude. But I will not let you risk your life to save mine. That's not something I can accept."
Lucas exhaled sharply, frustrated. His words came out cutting, in a last-ditch attempt to talk some sense into him. "Do you want to end up like your father, like Uncle Dong?" The mention of both names made Jaehyun tense, his fists clenching tightly until his knuckles turned white.
Jaehyun didn't respond. He turned around and started walking towards his car, trying to stifle the anger and pain boiling inside him. He could hear Luke's footsteps following him, the echoes of his words echoing in his head.
"We know I'll end up like that someday..." he muttered, without turning around. The resignation in his voice was a shock to both him and his friend.
But then, Lucas said something that forced him to stop, "What about (Y/N)?"
The name made his whole body freeze, (Y/N). He could see her in his mind, feel the warmth of her laughter, the twinkle in her eyes. She was the only light in the midst of his darkness, the only memory he dared to cherish in his loneliest moments. Inside him, where no one else could see him, was where he allowed her to exist, a longing he would never dare to confess.
"There is nothing with her." His voice was a harsh whisper, as if in saying it he was tearing out a piece of himself. He didn't even turn, just let it escape into the wind. "There can't be."
"I thought you were having something," Lucas confessed, stepping closer to stand in front of him, forcing him to look at him. "Maybe you can't see it, but anyone would notice. You don't have to say it, Jaehyun. It shows in your eyes every time you talk about her. You want something with her, anything. You're going to risk that by getting more into this shit?" Lucas waved his hand, almost unable to control himself. "We were doing relatively well selling those packages. At least we could pay for Winwin's treatment. But now... Weapons? What will they ask you to do next? Assaults? Robberies?" his voice deepened, and Jaehyun noticed the fear in his eyes. "Kills? Do you think (Y/N) would want to see you in that hell?"
Jaehyun closed his eyes and took a breath. Lucas' words drilled into him, burned inside him, but he couldn't accept them. He couldn't accept a possibility that he knew would end up hurting (Y/N).
Finally, he opened his eyes and looked at Lucas directly, with a forced coldness that tried to hide the storm inside him. "And what do you want me to do, Lucas? She doesn't deserve a life like mine. She needs to be away from all this...away from me. I could only drag her into this hole from which there is no way out." The words came out fast, almost angrily, but at the end his voice cracked. "I can't offer her anything, do you understand? Nothing worthwhile."
Lucas lowered his gaze, but his voice still reflected desperation to save him. "But you have something to offer, Jaehyun. Your life. A life that can still go somewhere, that can be something different." She looked at him pleadingly. "Don't make the trade. Don't get yourself into this anymore. You have a way out, even if you don't want to see it."
Jaehyun's decision was like a stone inside him, a sinking certainty, but it was the only thing that gave him stability at the moment. He averted his gaze to the city lights and quietly sealed his fate.
"I have to do it." The determination in his voice was unwavering. "It's already decided."
Lucas watched him silently, with a sadness so deep it was almost palpable. He knew, deep inside him, that he was losing another friend. The night closed in around them and under the stars, as the lights of the city shone in the distance, he knew that, in some sense, he had already lost his friend.
When (Y/N) got out of Jungwoo's car, the roars of the engines echoed in her ears, but despite the noise, her mind was somewhere else, anchored in a memory. The first time she set foot in Neo Zone, it had been a curiosity, an adventure she didn't fully understand. Now, that same place seemed just as intimidating, but different. This time she was not an outsider spectator. This time, she was there for him.
People's gazes were instantly fixed on her. Some with curiosity, others with disdain. The gleam in her eyes was not the same as those of the "normals" around her in her world. No, here the gazes were sharper, like knives, trying to strip her of her essence, her privilege. She felt out of place, and though in some corner of her mind she knew she would never be part of this world, at that moment all she cared about was finding him. Jaehyun.
The lights of the cars reflected the tense and charged atmosphere of the race track, where the local gangs came to show off their cars and gamble more than they should. She knew what she was up against, and if she had learned anything over the past few months, it was that, in that place, the rules were few, but fierce.
So she wasn't surprised when a familiar and unpleasant face emerged from the crowd. Chris, with that sly grin, who always seemed to have a second purpose behind every word.
"Well, look what we have here," he said, his voice laden with derision. "After Johnny's party, I didn't expect you to be one od Jaehyun's toys."
( Y/N) tried to keep her cool, her body rigid and her gaze steady. There was something about that guy that always made her feel small, as if his words were thorns thrown on purpose. But she had no time for games now. She wasn't here to confront Chris, only to find Jaehyun. "Let me through, Chris," she said, her voice cold, firm.
But he didn't let her go so easily. He stepped between her and the pass, and his hand brazenly strayed to her waist. A touch she didn't ask for, a brush she didn't want.
"Oh no, baby," he said, his tone low, like a challenge. "I think you owe me a debt for that punch you gave me, remember?"
( Y/N) she felt irritation bubbling inside her, but she wasn't going to lose her composure. Not here, not now. But she wasn't going to give in either. "Let go of me, or I swear I'll hit you again," she retorted, pushing lightly against his chest, hands firm. It wasn't what she wanted, but it was what she had to do. She wasn't going to let Chris touch her.
Chris laughed, but it wasn't a genuine laugh. It was mocking, calculating, as if he enjoyed the power he thought he had over her. "Can you imagine what Jaehyun will think when he sees me with one of his toys?" The malice in his voice left no room for doubt. He knew what he was doing, and he knew he had something he could use against her.
( Y/N) didn't answer right away. Her gaze wandered, searching through the crowd, and there, like a magnet, she found him. Jaehyun. He was far away, but she could feel the intensity of his gaze, the weight of his presence. And it wasn't just any glimpse, no. She knew she had seen him. His posture was rigid, his face annoyed, his eyes burning with a silent fire.
"Turn around to find out for yourself," Jaehyun said, his deep voice cutting through the air. It was not a suggestion. It was an order, firm, authoritative. At that moment, the threat was clear. "Let her go and get the fuck out of herr if you don't want that fucking smile wiped off your face. Remember, you're in my zone."
Chris hesitated for a second, then let go of (Y/N), as if Jaehyun's presence was a steel wall repelling him. Looking at Jaehyun as if he would challenge him, but knowing that this was not his territory. Jaehyun's area, yes, but not his.
Before walking away, however, he couldn't help but throw one last malice-laden glance towards (Y/N). "Call me when you get tired of him, gorgeous," he said venomously, not caring that his words were only empty provocation.
When Chris finally disappeared into the crowd, (Y/N) didn't hesitate for a second. He walked straight towards Jaehyun, until she was right behind him, the sound of his footsteps drowned out by the bustle of the arena. Feeling his presence so close gave her a strange sense of calm, but also aroused an uneasiness she didn't know how to handle.
Jaehyun turned slowly toward her. His expression was hard to read, but the frustration was evident. As always, he was trying to maintain control, but he couldn't hide the annoyance. In one swift movement, he grabbed her wrist, holding it firmly, forcing her to look him in the eye.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" he asked, anger tinged with palpable discomfort. His tone was low, dangerous. He wasn't saying it out loud for all to hear, but it was as if his words cut through the air between them.
( Y/N) felt a knot in her stomach. The worry, the confusion, the need to explain herself, but also the frustration of knowing that she had no right to be there, that this world was not hers. However, she could not lie. "I was looking for you," she said, without thinking, without fear of what that might mean.
"You weren't answering my calls. I wanted to know how you were..." she confessed, feeling Jaehyun pull her gently through the crowd to get her away from the people.
Finally, after pushing through the sea of people, they found themselves in a quieter corner. Jaehyun let go of her hand and turned to face her.
It was at that moment that he saw the pain reflected in her eyes. The girl, her gaze fixed on him, fiddled nervously with her fingers, as if trying to calm her anxiety.
"(Y/N), I'm fine. You didn't have to come and get into this," he told her in a low voice.
"You could have answered my calls," she demanded, her voice strained. "I didn't know how you were after what happened at my house almost a week ago."
Jaehyun looked her straight in the eye and slowly denied.
"That night I shouldn't have gone to your house."
What...?
"What are you talking about, Jaehyun?" she asked, almost in a whisper, surprised by those words.
Because deep down he knew he was right. That night he shouldn't have crossed that line, shouldn't have sought comfort from her, shouldn't have allowed the girl to sneak into his head and heart like that. He should not have allowed the closeness between them to make him vulnerable.
He shouldn't have thought he deserved something like that.
Because he didn't. He never would.
"Why is it that every time we seem to be moving forward, you decide to pull back?" she asked him, her voice breaking.
"Because there shouldn't be an us, (Y/N)," Jaehyun replied, serious, as if the words hurt him as much as they hurt her. "And you know it."
She tried to process what she had just heard, but her mind was still spinning, entwined with thoughts that wouldn't leave her alone. Coming here, meeting him...it had all been a whirlwind. Her cousin's words that morning still echoed in her mind.
That was not what she had expected to hear from Jaehyun.
"No, Jaehyun. I don't know," she said, frustrated, her eyes flashing with a mixture of confusion and anger. "All I know is that there's something inside me that binds me to you. I always end up looking for something in you, something I don't understand. And the least I understand is that you somehow get close and then walk away like it's nothing."
She moved closer to him and, with a trembling finger, pressed it against his chest, accusingly.
"If I walk away it's because you don't need this life, (Y/N)," he told her, with a painful tenderness in his voice. "I can't give you the life you want."
"I'm not asking you for anything extraordinary, Jaehyun," she replied, almost begging for him to understand. "I'm not asking you for more than what we already are."
Jaehyun looked at her, searching her eyes as if he wanted her to understand something beyond words. With the distance between them so short that their breaths were intertwined, he continued with a sigh.
"But look at me, (Y/N), look at us," he said softly. "I'll never be able to offer you the life you're used to. And I don't want you to get used to mine, because it's not something you deserve." Her voice deepened. "You don't know what it's like to live with necessities, without luxuries. It's not something I can ask you to change or sacrifice for me."
She bit her lower lip, trying to take in what she had just heard.
She was silent for a few seconds, biting her lower lip as her mind tried to process every word Jaehyun had just said. Her chest felt tight, as if his words were a weight on her, an uncomfortable truth that hurt, but one she knew she couldn't ignore.
Jaehyun closed his eyes.
"No, I don't," she finally admitted, looking down at the floor. "I don't know what it's like to live with those hardships..."
Silence fell between them again. The distant murmur of people seemed to grow farther and farther away, as if the world around them was fading away.
"(Y/N), you deserve better than this. Something more... something more stable. I can't be that something for you," Jaehyun said, his voice trembling for an instant.
She realized what he meant. She knew it wasn't just about the material. She knew that what Jaehyun was telling her went beyond external difficulties. He didn't want to be a risk to her, didn't want her life to be dragged down by the uncertainty, by the confusion he himself felt.
"And yet... I can't stop looking for you," she murmured, with a sad, almost defeated smile. "I don't understand what's wrong with me, Jaehyun. I don't understand why everything seems clearer when I'm around you, but then it blurs, it becomes all so confusing."
Jaehyun watched her, unable to find the right words. All he knew was that there was an undeniable connection between them, something even he couldn't explain. But, at the same time, he couldn't deny the fear he felt that this connection would drag them into something neither of them could control.
"I'm sorry," he finally said, his words sounding almost like an apology to himself. "I really am sorry."
She stared at him, as if she expected him to say something else, something that might make sense of everything she felt. But he didn't. Instead, the air between them was filled with a quiet awkwardness.
"So what do we do now?" she asked, voice cracking, but determined not to give up.
Jaehyun took a deep breath, staring ahead as if searching for some answer in the void. "I don't know. But I need you to understand that I don't want to hurt you. I don't want you to end up trapped in my world..."
She denied slowly, not looking away. "So is that it, then, we're just going to keep taking a step forward and then step back? Is that what you want?"
"It's not that," Jaehyun replied, somewhat at a loss. "It's just that I can't offer you what you deserve."
"What about what I want?" she said, on an impulse that surprised her. "Because all I want...is to be with you."
Her words hit him hard. Jaehyun couldn't say he felt the same way, not in the same way. But he couldn't help but think that, maybe, if they both allowed themselves to take that leap... maybe things could be different.
"I'm telling you that I can't give you what you want," he repeated, now with a slight desperation in his tone. "And yet, I feel like I can't walk away from you."
She looked at him silently for a few seconds, trying to find some answer that wouldn't leave her more confused. Finally, she took a step back, letting the air between them grow colder.
"So... what do we do, Jaehyun?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper. "Because I don't know if I can keep waiting for something I don't know if it's coming."
Jaehyun looked at her, his heart pounding. He could see the pain in her eyes, and it broke him inside. But at the same time, he knew he couldn't drag her down with him, couldn't ask her to settle for something he couldn't offer.
"The only thing I can do now...is tell you the truth," he said, almost breathlessly. "I'm not going to drag you into my life without you knowing what you're getting into."
She stood still, staring at the floor, as if processing every word. An invisible weight seemed to fall on her shoulders, and though her thoughts were chaotic, a small part of her knew she had to make a decision.
"So, you decide for me?" she asked, raising her head, her eyes filled with a mixture of frustration and sadness.
Jaehyun said nothing. His silence was answer enough.
Finally, Jaehyun, his throat tightening, slowly pulled away, knowing that any further attempts to get closer would only cause more pain. "I'm sorry," he said one last time, almost as a whisper, and took a step back.
And (Y/N) watched him walk away, her heart heavy, knowing there was nothing more to do. She stood alone in that dark corner of Neo Zone, with the noise of the engines rumbling around her, like a distant echo of the emotional storm she had just experienced.
a/n: I hope you liked even though in took me weeeeeeks to post hahaha, love y'all! NOT PROOFREAD! I’ve been sitting down like 4 hours trying to come with the chapter so now I’ll go to sleep 😴.
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BREAKFAST
— spencer reid x bau!fem!reader
— summary: after a few weeks of intense work, spencer wanted to surprise her with breakfast in bed, but he discovered that sometimes coffee and bed don't make good pairs.
— c/w: i think none?
— w/c: 1.3k
— a/n: hello! another spencer one-shot! i hope you guys like it and let me know your thoughts! english is not my first language, so forgive me if there's any mistake!
The sun was just beginning to show timidly through the bedroom window when Spencer woke up, carefully removing the arm that had wrapped around him and placing it on his pillow. He turned over, his gaze resting on her sleeping face, observing the relaxed and finally peaceful features. For a moment, he stood there, almost hypnotized by that rare tranquility, something that, because of their work, was difficult and even more precious to see.
With a discreet smile, he decided to leave without waking her. He walked to the kitchen with light steps, where he began to prepare everything with precise, silent movements. She knew exactly what she was going to make: crispy toast, a touch of strawberry jam, and the strongest coffee, just the way she liked to start the day. From the fruit bowl, she chose a handful of grapes and an apple, her favorite fruit, thinking of cutting them up to make the perfect fruit salad.
While the coffee scented the kitchen, Spencer looked around, mentally assembling the tray. He wanted everything to have a touch of simplicity and intimacy, to show how much he paid attention to the little details - the way she appreciated pausing for another cup of coffee, the smile that appeared as she savored the first bite of toast. That morning, Spencer wanted every little gesture to be a reminder that she was always taken care of.
Spencer opened the cupboard, taking out the jar of jam and the slices of toast, feeling the pleasure of putting together every detail of the surprise. He knew it didn't have to be anything too elaborate, after all, she liked simple things that brought comfort and familiarity, but without losing the special touch.
He cut up some of the fresh fruit and, without resisting, took one of the grapes and tasted it. The sweet, fresh taste brought him a wave of tranquility; it was the kind of morning they rarely had. He placed everything on the tray with extreme care, adjusting each item almost as if he were preparing a work of art. As he concentrated on every detail, his thoughts wandered to anticipating the expressions he expected to see on her face when she woke up, that mixture of surprise and affection that warmed his heart every time.
The idea of surprising her with a morning like this, full of little details made with care and love, made Spencer smile, looking forward to the moment when he saw the smile appear on her lips.
He was just finishing arranging the tray when he remembered one detail. “Ah, the orange cake!” he smiled, opening the fridge door and finding the last slice. It was the cake they had made together a few days earlier on a quiet evening, laughing at Spencer's disastrous attempts at measuring the flour. He knew she would be happy to see that small gesture, a piece of that night shared in laughter and complicity.
With the tray carefully balanced in his hands, he entered the room with light steps, his gaze fixed on the image of her still tangled in the sheets. The room was quiet, the soft morning light beautifully illuminating her face, which was sleeping soundly, with such a peaceful expression that Spencer wondered for a moment if he was really going to do that, almost without the courage to interrupt.
He approached slowly, resting the tray on the bedside table, and leaned over, allowing himself a moment of pure admiration. Gently, he brushed his fingers across her shoulder, whispering softly, as if each word were a gentle invitation for her to wake up, and kissing her cheek quickly.
She opened her eyes slowly, blinking to get used to the light. When she saw Spencer standing there, with a shy smile and a carefully prepared tray beside him, her expression turned to surprise and tenderness. A sleepy smile appeared on her lips, and she stood up a little, her eyes shining in a way that made Spencer's heart beat faster.
“Good morning,” murmured Spencer, his voice warm with restrained affection. He could barely disguise his joy at seeing her reaction, as she now looked at every item on the tray with a look that mixed surprise and gratitude.
“You… did all this for me?” she asked, and Spencer nodded, the shy smile turning into a soft gleam in his eyes.
“I wanted to do something special,” he replied, as she picked up her coffee cup with an expression of pure happiness. “I know we haven't had a lot of free time these past few days, so I wanted our first free morning to be special, and I made you this coffee in bed.” It was a simple moment, but for Spencer, it was everything - he knew that in that smile and the sparkle in her eyes, there was a silent exchange of affection that made the morning even more perfect.
As they arranged themselves on the bed, trying to find a comfortable balance for the tray between them, Spencer leaned over to pick up the piece of cake, and she did the same, both laughing as they realized they had almost collided. In the midst of their relaxation, she moved abruptly, and Spencer saw the cup of coffee tilting too late.
The hot liquid ran down the tray and onto the sheet, and they froze for a second before bursting into laughter. Spencer tried to save one of the toasts, but the jam had already spread. She, laughing almost childishly, grabbed a napkin and tried to clean up the mess, but her clumsy efforts only made matters worse, which made them both laugh even harder.
“When you said you cooked breakfast in bed, I didn't imagine it would literally be in bed,” she said, with a mischievous grin, while Spencer looked in her direction, trying to keep a serious expression, but failing completely. Each laugh seemed to disarm him, leaving Spencer carefree and immersed in that lightness he rarely felt.
Unable to contain himself any longer, he let go of the toast and let himself fall beside his partner, laughing himself to tears. She lay down next to him, still laughing, the two of them completely ignoring the mess on the sheet, enjoying the moment as if nothing else mattered. Between giggles and complicit glances, Spencer felt that this unexpected chaos had been the perfect touch to a morning that had somehow become even more special.
Between giggles and small coffee stains on the sheet, they settled down again, now with what little was left of breakfast. Spencer held up a slice of cake with an amused expression, offering her a piece, which she accepted with a lazy smile, still savoring the joy of the moment.
They ate slowly, their movements slowed down by the tranquility of the moment. She reached out, running her fingers through Spencer's tousled hair, and he closed his eyes, allowing himself to relax under her gentle touch. It was rare to have a morning like this, with no rush or worry, just the two of them, together and present for each other.
“I could get used to this.” Spencer heard her murmur, her eyes shining as they met his. The smile on her face was warm, filled with gratitude that words couldn't fully express.
Spencer leaned in, running his hand over her face in a caressing gesture, his thumb gliding gently across her cheek. “Maybe we should do this more often.” he whispered, his voice low and laden with a tenderness he could rarely express.
They stayed there, exchanging light caresses and soft laughter, as if the world outside didn't exist. The cold coffee, the pieces of toast forgotten on the tray, and everything else was insignificant next to what they felt there together. For Spencer, that moment of tranquility and affection was exactly what they both needed - a silent reminder that, even in the little things, they could find deep and sincere happiness.
#criminal minds x reader#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fic#spencer reid imagine
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