#this shan't be the last of her
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Will we see more Marie Biscuit in future installments? I really enjoyed her character.
I absolutely plan on bringing her back, this wont be the last you see of her or the boys!
Speaking of- it's national dog day so what better than a drawing of the lady herself (in glorious technicolor, wowie!)
#one haunted night#marie biscuit#toon#oc#my art#artist-block-alley#alley speaks#this shan't be the last of her
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wouldn't you like a taste of the power?
#last dunmeshi thursday........... sparkle on and have a delicious day#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#dunmeshi#dunmeshi spoilers#dungeon meshi spoilers#delicious in dungeon spoilers#mithrun#mithrun of the house of kerensil#blood tw#light gore tw#my art#2024#i like him a normal amount i think#shout out to all the other tomura refugees flocking to this manga rn hi guys#he is sooo strangler fig by the crane wives btw. but i had this song on loop when i was drawing because it reminded me of the demon sm#-> she can turn you to an animal that'll end up on her plate#-> you must consume and digest it then you'll manifest a being of your creation. all you need's imagination#etc etc etc. dungeon lord era. i shan't go on. you get it#i really like how the demon is continuously portrayed like an abusive lover the imagery of it all is so good#also let it be known when the finale gets animated i will be sobbing wailing and losing my shit#voice casting koki uchiyama was done to target me specifically i think. anyway#oh and the flower is a snapdragon do with that information what you will
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ok even if we ignore that the white hart was insanely dumb and hokey and that you should have your asoiaf fan card revoked if you're taking the idea that the gods sent down a mystical fucking deer to magically decide who gets to be an oppressive autocrat seriously, saying "chosen by the people" while showing me a group of, like, six guys on a rock (as if we didn't watch an entire dragonpit's worth of a throng cheering and celebrating aegon afdgshfagsafssd) is so insanely fucking funny to me sorry not sorry
#personal#last bit of as the old people say 'fandom wank' from me#as i have decided i shan't watch season 2 live#but this is the problem with bookmarking the occasional conquest/team green tweet#twitter thinks i want to see all hotd takes including team black ones#and let me be clear i do not#as fandom twitter never yields up anything good#as seen here what with the 'the white hart was good writing guys!' and 'this carpool car's worth of people means rhaenyra was Chosen'#i actually think it's a lot more interesting that rhaenyra was never embraced by the people in the show#that they were never on board with her#i think it adds layers to her as a character to be aware of that#but y'all don't want rhaenyra to be interesting you want her to be a mix of dany and a self insert oc
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the amazing showstopping life-changing beautiful lovely and talented @alcego tagged me in the writing game where you post all your first sentences from already posted fics (and also the just as amazing showstopping life changing beautiful lovely AND talented roisin, thank you!) but i don't really care much for those lately so here's the first lines of several WIPs at the moment as a compromise :)
Kevin knows he’s being watched. (with @knickknacksandallthat <3)
“Riko? Are you awake?”
In the morning when Jean is supposed to be sent to his death, he takes five minutes out of his schedule to braid Kevin’s hair. (with @jaywalkers :)<3)
Not for the first time, they are in the infirmary.
“Coach says you don’t talk anymore,” Aaron mumbles, looking out the window awkwardly.
Christmas dinner with the Gordons is perfect.
Some people ride the crazy train. Jeremy drives it.
Neil knows the gray does something to people.
what this tells me is that i am bad at writing first lines HAHA :3 i am tagging um everyone who wants to do this. thank you!
#theyre also all rather short which at least im pleased with#also my favorite is number 2 its the riko transmigrator au and it lives in daydreams with me#i LOVE you scum villain's self saving system i love you i love you#its so silly and i love it so dearly#uhhh lets see what else. thg au with roisin! absolute banger#kerejean with miss niknak! ABSOLUTE banger#7 is first time / first light#and 8 is gratuitous kandreil smut with gray haired kevin <3 yay#no but seriously what this tells me is that while looking through my wips i realized i need to write something for k/t or k/j/t#ive written thea before but only in brief mentions so i want to try to get her pov right or at least a good grip on writing her#kevin day you're fucked. and you will be fucked#amen#uuuh lets see. number 6 i will not tell you but i will say i love seth gordon#and number 4 is the previously mentioned jean in palmetto fic#but it is actually mostly an excuse to write gratuitous sub!jean smut#thats all i have for you. for now. i will go back to the drawing board and draft up some kevthea for my enjoyment#either lesbian kevthea (i hauve covid) or. i shan't say it in public#nora sakavic saw me talking about kevin day forced feminization the last time i'm not taking chances now#txt#my writing
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Elgar'nan, smash or pass?
Personally Pass, but i Get It?
as in like. I really like his dominer and his voice. as in like. He falls under this category of villains like Sephiroth where it almost sounds like he's flirting in a bdsm way. He rarely gets purely angry, his voice is really calm and suave in some way, and he says stuff like "i don't ask much. praise me, love me, worship me, and kneel for me" like. He gave me a bit of the impression of the Goblin King from Labyrinth.
He's clearly a tyrant and an awful person but he's the type of guys who hide the most cruel things he plans to do behind velvet words. And i admit like. I Get It. Like i can't say it didn't make me pause and go 😳 a little.
one of his redeeming quality/the way it shows especially is his dynamic with Ghilan'nain which intruigues me SOOO MUCH.
Physically he's not my type and loser is wearing a wig, but considering my ultimate blorbo i can't judge him on that.
But personality-wise i want to kick him into the sun he likes so much and he has done too many crimes apologetically that i do wish him a painful death.
And Solas detests him so i have to make him my enemy-in-law this is how it works. That said Solas also says he specifically hates Elgar'nan because he is what he fears he could become if he stopped listening to others people and stopped admitting when he was wrong. So in a sense i can't help but 👀 oh worm?
So yeah like, pass. But if i hadn't been devoted to Solas.................... and had looser morals................................... well ........................ it's not like it doesn't work on me yaknow.
but at least i'll thank him always for having Solas says one of his sexiest lines <3
#ngl in early promo when they said they had good reasons for the inquisitor to be away#and bc one of the promo material showed Elgar'nan figures wraps around the dread wolf in particular#i somehow kept wondering 'what if Elgar'nan kidnaps the Inquisitor'#and just the high of the drama that would have been if Solamanced....#but solamancers are already getting shit on for having a bit more content this game (we had the least content last game sorry??)#so i can't imagine the shitstorm that would have been lmao#but with how Elgar'nan behaves with the people he kidnaps in game?#with this velvety voice saying he'll gladly take care of them and making his tyranny looks like benevolence? like he's gracing them?#im just saying i might have been thinking a lot about the concept of Elgar'nan trying to kidnap a romanced!Inquisitor#(not specifically bc of the romance but like. the Inq. is a godlike figure in the South. Might as well just challenge her to prove himself)#(and bonus point if Inq. drank from the Well of Sorrows and we could explore his own relationship with Mythal via reacting to that)#(and bonus therefore as romance realizing she is THE dread wolf's weakness)#(and knowing his dominer.........)#(.............. i may have put too much thoughts into it but i shan't say more)#anyway so. what i was saying. yeah Pass. But also such drama. i'm looking.#ichareply#anonymous#ichafantalks da#ichablogging davg
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Are you going to see Cole's new movie?
that's a negative, anonarino. i gotta be honest, i don't even really know what the premise is. franken-esque? i haven't seen any trailers or ads yet so, you know, i'm going off of zero knowledge about it.
i did promise to take my exchange student to see that rom com with that capybara guy for a little galentines night out tho. mostly because i enjoy movie theater nachos and i am trying to steal one of those kung fu panda 4 popcorn buckets without being caught.
#besos!#anonymous#tbh even if i wanted to my student has a serious sensitivity to any sort of gore/horror#and i can promise neither she or the mister want to see it ha#she asked me to take her to see argylle and every time anything happened to that cat she was so mad the lady next to us was giving side eye#still better than last year when i took my student to see that puss in boots movie#and she got the giggles when the puppy was giving his sad backstory speech#and i mean giggled uncontrollably to the point of tears and someone actually stood up to turn and look at her#and her defense was that she's french#i learned that you cannot die of embarrassment but you can wish that you did#anyways i watched the trailer just now out of curiosity and it was very...grunty#any opinions i have will just set off you know who#so i shan't#i worry about her blood pressure
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the stanley donen gene kelly vincente minnelli fred astaire influences in this movie are so immediately potent i'm losing my mind it really says something about me that i've watched like a dozen movies in two weeks and the two that hit me hardest are the one about the *checks notes* real life musician from the late 50s-70s where i knew the basic facts and big hits and tragic ending going in yet still attached so much to the human aspect of the story and *checks again* the romantic musical that intentionally riffs on old hollywood and the illusory draw yet necessity of dreams and is bound to be heartbreaking
#and before these two the one that got me most last year was ttb where i also knew the real story and heartbreaking ending#and in fact already knew the music itself and yet it still both shattered and consoled my heart and felt like a revelation#it's that they're all about art and music and humanity and passion and the art of making art#ur girl is sinking back into her classic hollywood and musical theatre roots i fear#i'm unwell#ironically my feelings for these movies is actually proof that i'm very firmly returning to myself#myself is just unwell <3#i have one small complaint but i shan't voice it#also i have not slept but we're pretending it's fine.#jess.mess
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GONNA SEE 🥐 TODAY. IM FEELING SOOOOOOOO NORMAL ABOUT THIS. IF YOU EVEN CARE!!!!!!!!!!
#gods. i love her so much#ew ive just seen an ugly car#anyway. im cold#HER OUTFIT WAS SO BAD LAST SUNDAU😫😫😫😫😫😫. i wamt her to.......... no💪. i shan't say#sparimg all the ace mutuals The Horrors#🥐 tag#mine
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almost done writing one of The Scenes in orchestra au... God I'm gonna miss this when im done
#was expressing this to a friend earlier and he said 'lori. one shots.' and i went OH!!!#so whenever i post ch6 there is an accompaniment annabeth pov btw <33#and im thinking abt lou bc shes so angry but she j wants her bestie...#or cecil bc he tries So Hard to be kind and funny and Good but he is always the last one to be thought of#(or he feels like that)#hazel who is just the brightest star. her crimes include psychological torture and death threats#orchestra prequel of nicos time in middle school when bianca left.#wills time in middle school when his brothers died.#orchestra sequel where... hm i shan't say... spoilers <3#orchestra au
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The older I get, the more I just realize that I am my mom
#miranda talking shit#No I'm not she's amazing and badass I could never but....#Her in my caring ways. I just act more and more like a mom as I grow#Like her... I see a wounded. Lonely and sad person/creature and I am already trying to adopt it#It's a bit of a problem when I consider how I work... Romantically. If I compare her and dad's relationship... Ummm#I always say I don't want to end up in that kinda relationship but then I'm also on the sideline falling for everyone with some kind of#Problems ™. Last crush? Mommy issues deep ones among other things.#The one before that? Deppressed weed addict. The one before that? Um....#Well we were teens so shan't say but definitely big... Troubles in family#I guess the wounded seek the wounded and whatever but like... Yeah#At one hand it's scary bc my mom just married the man with generational daddy issues#But also I struggle to se myself ever like someone who don't have some sort of... Either trauma or mental problems.#Bc I... Know people without it struggle so hard to understand and I need to be understood#I at least never think I can “fix” those people. It's never been about that for me... More like... Ah you can understand me in this pain?#But I am definitely dangerous for people who look for motherly care bc I'm literally just...#Ok im holding u.... Only thing saving me is that my energy meter is too low to ever mommy someone with practical things#I'll get you a glas of water and tie your shoes occasionally but bitch I ain't cleaning your messes#I barely clean my own...#At one hand i hate being this way bc... I don't have kids like why would I need to nurture. But then someone compares me to an mother and#I'm crying. To me being compared to an mom is like them saying they know I love them unconditionally. They are saying they see I care#I know it's meant as an joke or half insult but each time I'm like (: yeah... Good that my love is reaching you
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· · · · ♡ IF (SAINZ WIN == TRUE) (cs55)
… starring carlos sainz x f!engineer!reader ... 4.4k words ... in which carlos is an effusive, self-assured lad to every member of his team... except ferrari's head software engineer, making her wonder if he secretly hates her guts. ... based on this request ... warnings for language (minor) ... my first ever (posted) fic for carlos aaaaa (i have written A Lot More about this man because he occupies my every waking hour, but i shan't share it yet). in honor of me missing my communication networks final last week i made the reader a software engineer, but you would Never catch me willingly coding anything in c++ outside of my mandated assignments. no not even for carlos sainz jr. i have morals. this is open for part 2 if you guys enjoy it <3
He speaks the language of princes.
It's not in anything he says, no, he's much too industrious to waste time boasting, but rather in all that he doesn't. Carlos walks into the Ferrari motorhome, with that good-natured smile and that slightly disheveled hair from the morning's cycling session, and heads bow. Not out of plight, or even obligation, but mostly because it's hard not to. His warm greetings to everyone—Ciao's and even Come stai?'s to his team members strolling down the hallways before the weekend—, his keen interest in remembering little things about engineers' and photographers' lives, his nonchalant stride around the parc fermé all force camaraderie at least; reverence to most.
Wherever the red car goes, Maranello or any other corner of the world, religion follows, and though Carlos Sainz has never quite fit into the nooks they keep for their idols—their walls are carved for Monégasque shoulders—, he's at least always carried the air of a rebel leader on unforgving land.
But if Carlos is Ferrari's bastard prince, then clearly you are a subject he would not go to war for.
Or so he makes you think, once again, on that hot Singaporean afternoon.
You hadn't meant to interrupt, really, but with only one hour to go before FP1, you needed to talk to Riccardo Adami; something about the software updates, optimization of the data acquisition systems to account for Marina Bay's sweltering heat—run for half a second too long, overheat half a degree too much, and everyone's calculations would be going to hell. So of course you'd corrected it, supervised a brand new version of your code for the weekend, for that tenth of a Celsius; competition drove you. Almost just as much as those solar eyes boring into you when you walk into the room.
"Riccardo, about the softw—oh. Carlos. Hi," you timidly trail off when Carlos' eyes meet yours.
The room gets quiet, and it is only then that you notice how much space his laugh takes. Usually, you would've recognized the accent from outside the door, the boisterous voice regaling the Fifty-fives with another funny story—how could you not, when it sends shockwaves down your stomach? He seems to have been in an animated conversation with his race engineer, but as you get closer to the two men you notice the crinkles lengthening Carlos' eyes are fading with his smile. You aren't sure he's even said hi back.
"We've changed the code for acquisition, but some loops could still cause problems with overheating, particularly the engine oil temperature sensors…" you explain, though half your attention is directed to your peripheral vision, in which Carlos sways on his two feet, averting your gaze at all costs.
But you're not a college girl with a crush, you're Scuderia Ferrari's head software engineer and so you go on with your precisions to Riccardo. What to expect during free practice, how to overshoot any nonessential sensors that might fuck up the data analysis... until, mid-sentence, Carlos excuses himself awkwardly, pats Ricky on the shoulder, and walks out of the room.
You will your face into not betraying the sudden ache in your throat. How he simply acted like you weren't there... didn't even inquire about the updates. About the race. About your flight, about how much you loved Singapore's twinkling lights, about... you.
"Xavi and Charles know this already, but we really gotta test it all now before it gets cooler for FP2," you conclude with a too-hard swallow. Back firmly turned to the door Carlos just disappeared out of.
Riccardo thanks you, offers his own insight, some banalities about the risks of rain—no, you shouldn't consider them banalities. Nothing, on a Friday, is a banality anymore; yet everything is when you remember how Carlos' entire face shuts close when you're around, how his tone quietens down, how he repeatedly and stubbornly conceals all his rays of brazenness from you.
Does he hate you? Despise you? Are you not worth his effrontery?
This is ridiculous. You're not a college girl with a crush, you're a damn senior member of the team with responsibilities and he doesn't owe you anything more or less than you him—
"Riccardo," you neither ask nor plead. "Has Carlos... said anything about me?"
"About you? Like what?"
"I don't know... but you did see he just... left while I was in the middle of talking, right? And he looked annoyed as soon as I came in." And for all that's holy, try to pass this off as mere politeness and not a heartache that is eating you alive.
"Maybe he was just bored."
"So I'm boring?"
"No," Riccardo wheezes, in uncharacteristically high spirits for the conversation. "But I've worked with a ton of drivers, and you know, they're all the same. Less time discussing boring analytics is more time they spend in the sim. Or on track. What, you think he's angry at you or something?"
"I just... don't get why he's always so guarded and distant with me but so outgoing and confident with you guys. Charles isn't like that either. It makes no sense. We're a team, all of us."
The Italian looks at you for long seconds, amusement noticeable on his features, and you would shake him up and tell him to stop giving you those pity eyes if you lacked the tiniest bit of respect for the man; instead, you frown and cross your arms.
"He'll be in a good mood tonight when we top free practice," Riccardo assures you before you can ask him if he needs anything else. "and even better tomorrow after getting pole. You can talk to him then if you want."
A smile creeps its way on your lips without you conjuring it. There it is, that loyal veneration that only men and women of the Scuderia possess. Something in those southern eyes Carlos shares with legend has made you religious, too.
"I'll hold you to that... we could all use a Singapore miracle."
Singapore is a miracle.
Surely any other team would scoff at the word, bragging that a pole position has nothing to do with miracles, that it's all meticulous teamwork and endless iterations on calculators, but Ferrari is deeply supersitious at its core. You—the centenarian team, its red-hot beating heart—don't shy away from thanking divine intervention. Maybe that's the reason why it still works.
After Carlos' last pole in Monza, the whole Scuderia had dared to dream of something different, a glimmer of scarlet in the season's overwhelming orange. Of course, an uncatchable Max had put a dampen on the fervent Tifosi's mood, but the formidable hope machine had revved back to life...
and now it's roaring in Marina Bay.
Leclerc's side of the garage claps for a hard-earned P3, but it's the Spaniard's team that erupts into cheers and rushes out into the pitlane to congratulate their hero. You stare at his lap time on your monitor with a grin—1:30.984, not even a tenth faster than his teammate—as cheerful screams, in Italian and Spanish, fill the garage; they get louder when Carlos walks back inside, grinning ear to ear and not even bothering to dodge the strong-arm pats on his head and back.
"Twice in a row, cazzo!"
"And this time you won't have Verstappen underfoot!"
"Perfect lap, Carlos, that was a perfect lap..."
"Grazie a tutti," Carlos beams, fire suit down to his waist, running clammy hands through his hair—he parts the red sea as he walks deeper into the garage, close to where you are. "I think we all did a very good job today, and now we gotta finish the job tomorrow..."
He laughs with the mechanics, a sun of fire and victory casting its rays onto the tarmac, and maybe it's the euphoria of the moment, but a sudden wind of courage rushes through your blood, and you walk up to him.
"Bravo, Carlos."
Your voice hits him like the purr of an engine in the ruckus, overshadowing any other sound; he whips his head in your direction, shiny eyes colliding with yours, and for the first time you don't back off but hold them in awe, and his smile doesn't fade, but rather shifts. To surprise, or... coyness?
"You were incredible out there, we're all so so proud of you," you praise, and the more you look at him the wider your smile grows, and the quieter the rest of the world gets.
"Thank you, Y/N," he rubs the back of his neck, his free hand fiddling with the hanging sleeves of his fire suit. "We... I couldn't have done this without you. Because, you know, the overheating, or what you were saying to Ricky before? I didn't understand everything, but at least I didn't cook to death."
Coyness? In Carlos Sainz? When he's still sweaty and panting from qualifying first? What a bizarre sight, one that makes you giggle.
The way your nose scrunches up beneath sparkling eyes is so endearing, Carlos almost feels his breath hitch in his throat, almost reaches out to lightly brush your arm, hold the steady coolness of it.
"Great, that was what we were going for, pretty much," you reply, and for a second you could've sworn he wanted to touch your arm and changed his mind, but...
you bury the idea before a craving for his warmth can nestle in your chest.
"Great," he repeats. "So, I'll... see you later," and with that he leaves you there, stranded in the middle of the garage, to be lauded by the press and fans.
You'd be lying if you said his shadow disappearing out the backdoor as quickly as it had come doesn't slice a gash in your heart—always whisked away to some important obligation, and you, like everyone else, duty-bound to pick up the pieces behind him. But this time around the cut doesn't run as deep, doesn't bleed as red; because for the first time in months Carlos talked to you, joked with you, and looked the tiniest bit glad to be doing so.
If that's how good of a mood a pole puts him in... then clearly you'd better make damn sure he wins this race.
Ferrari is deeply superstitious at its core. Maybe that much is true in any sport—when victory eludes you, athletes find obscure laws to trick themselves into believing they still retain control—, but a team so old, on which glory has rained so often, does not withstand the passage of time without a few pillars of faith. And so it makes sense that Ferrari drivers, of all people, would have their pre-race traditions.
Leclerc plays the piano on Saturday nights; you hear him every time you pass by the team hotel's lounge, his melancholy tracks grounding you in a precise time and place. Now the car is out of bounds, the comfort of your object-oriented programming and optimized lines of code off-limits; now's the time for withdrawal and rest.
Typically, you like to hang out in the lounge while Charles plays, trying to distract yourself with a book or simply basking in the music. The predictable, calculated flow of Charles' arpeggios soothes you, like lines of code running one after the other. So does the Monégasque driver's easy conversation. Although it doesn't shoot butterflies in your belly like Carlos' does... but you're not supposed to play favorites.
This Grand Prix eve is just like any other, save for the unordinary trepidation that carpets the hotel. With one of their own sitting on pole, it's obvious strategists struggle more than usual to drop the words "tire management" and "pit stops". Eager to escape the nervousness, you excuse yourself from the dinner table, and make your way to the lounge.
Charles is already there, if the usual pieces echoing in the distance at dessert are any indication, and you barely even get lost in the elegant halls before you find the lounge... though there is no piano to be heard. Maybe this hotel has two music rooms—maybe Charles went to bed early—or maybe...
maybe he's sitting on the piano stool and chatting with Carlos, wet and sleepy from his evening shower.
Neither driver notices you at first, and you stop dead in your tracks, wondering if you should just leave. You wouldn't want to intrude—intrude on what, the rational part of your brain says, but with Carlos I always feel like I'm intruding on something bigger than myself, the rest of your body answers—, but you really enjoy this unspoken tradition with Charles... and, well, this is everybody's lounge, and...
"Y/N," Charles sees you eventually and beckons you over. "Sorry, I don't think there'll be a lot of music tonight, Carlos is distracting me."
"You could kick me out anytime," Carlos remarks good-naturedly, but you don't miss how he angles his body away from you ever so slightly. The sight sends a dagger through your heart. So he actually hates you then. So you didn't breach any barrier earlier at the circuit, didn't melt any ice. So he didn't look pleased and a little excited to be talking to you.
"That's okay, I'll just head to bed then—"
"Oh no no no," Charles interrupts, "come sit with us. I was trying to convince Carlos to give the piano a go, maybe you'll be more successful than me."
"Absolutely not, mate."
"Come on Carlos, it will relax you!"
"No, you're the musician, not me. One of us has to be the sportsman, no?"
Unsure, you flick between the two men, Charles' inviting face and Carlos, who's still doing everything he can to avoid looking at you in the eye. And then you decide—fuck it. You're just as much a member of the team as he is. He cannot drive you away with his... stupid cold shoulder tactics any longer.
You take a seat on the sofa opposite Carlos, and watch in half delight, half annoyance as he turns his shoulders away from you. Though his body language appears relaxed, one leg strewn across his knee and elbows hugging the backrest, he is, as usual, going to hell and beyond to not acknowledge your presence.
Charles has the merit of lightening the mood with his jokes and fan encounters of the day: some bizarre, some endearing, because he seemingly never has a boring day in the paddock. His easy laughter mixes with the distant voices down the halls when your attention drops—too fast, too soon, as always, it's irremediable—to Carlos, the soothing scent of his shampoo and the little droplets that run down his temple whenever he shakes his head in amusement... before you know it, you're staring again, eyes shining with undisclosed heartache. Something Charles sees, and recognizes very well, with a jot of curiosity.
Charles may not be the most perceptive when it comes to these things, but he is in love too, and he'd know the signs anywhere. That's why after a little while he lets silence blow his last words away like wind does the mist, and stands up from the piano stool.
"Well, I'm going to bed," he announces with an air of conniving finality, and he smiles his crooked smile at Carlos. "Gonna need all my energy to take the lead in turn 1."
This snaps you out of your reverie. Half-gone, you bid him goodnight at the same time as the Spaniard does, and you brace yourself for his own excuse... but it doesn't come. Carlos lazily watches as Charles leaves the lounge. You don't dare to move, as if your slightest sound could remind him you're there and trigger his fight.
You would've thought a tête-à-tête with you to be Carlos' worst nightmare... but he makes no sign of leaving. And sends solar flares up your chest and throat. "Whatever problem he's got with me, he'll have it sort it out with me like an adult" sounds much more intimidating when it's so plausible.
"You think he has the slightest chance of overtaking me in turn 1?" Carlos chuckles.
You look him straight in the eye and read no resentment, not even that sheepishness from before—just relaxed delight, and the slightest hint of reddened cheeks against tan, damp skin. It takes you a second, maybe even two, to realize there's no one else in the room. He's talking to you. Joking with you.
Why is the script running without error all of a sudden, even though you changed no variables?
"Maybe," you give a noncommittal shrug and a smile. "Why not? It all depends on you."
"He can lead the first lap if he wants. That will just make it more fun to cross the finish line ahead of him after."
"You better win this one, Sainz, because I..." you start, and midway through your sentence are hit by how absolutely ridiculous you're about to sound, but he's leaned in already, intrigued by your words, and his burning gaze and strong hands fiddling in his lap have you losing all notions of propriety. "I've... coded a little something for you. If you win. A surprise. It's not much, but... yeah."
Your whole face burns deep scarlet as you trail off... and the light in Carlos' eyes darkens, then goes out completely. His smile fades back to the usual professional grimace he reserves for you. Distant. Cold. He rises to his feet.
"I should get some sleep."
Terror strikes you. Incomprehension too.
"No, Carlos, wait."
He turns his head to your outstretched hand... your pleading eyes almost rip through his heart.
"Why do you dislike me so much?"
And then his shoulders slump, like crushed by an immense weariness, and he sighs, long and hard, before his gaze falls back to yours. Those big brown eyes, gentle, compassionate, and those fingers tapping against his thigh like they're waiting for an invisible cue to reach out for yours.
"... Can we talk about this after the race?" he says, shooting daggers through your stomach.
So he didn't deny it. Didn't reassure you, tell you it's all a misunderstanding, that he bears no ill will towards you, that you're imagining things as usual and that you two could be on the best of terms if you just got out of your head a little bit.
One more time, he's running away. Sweeping everything under the rug, for just one more session, one more race, hiding behind the excuse of concentration and professionalism.
But who are you to revoke him that? It's a damn good excuse. You need to win. He needs to win. Not be bothered about... interpersonal relationships while clipping walls.
"... Alright," you concede, voice and bones all broken, glistening under your frozen skin. "But if it's something I've done, then I'm sorry. I really do... enjoy your company. And you."
"It's not something you've done," he speaks quietly. Gosh, your frailty in this moment—you, so proud and unshakable on the pit wall, so dedicated and thorough on TV, so immeasurably devoted to Ferrari, to Charles, to him... "Or, well, I guess not directly..."
If he looks into your confused, imploring eyes one more second, almost brushes your arm with his one more time, then he's done for. But he thinks he knows this already.
"I don't dislike you," he starts speaking and as soon as he opens his mouth he knows there's no stopping himself now, so he blurts it all out as quickly as he can to get it over with and hopefully bury some meaning in the pits of his accent. "Not at all. In fact I really like you. I think you're gorgeous, and smart, and clever, and fun, and every day I wish I could spend more time with you outside of races and get to know you better but then I remember that can never happen and it's so frustrating and I have the hardest time concentrating. So I just avoid you. It's easier."
Silence thick as a thundercloud tethers you to one another. He runs a hand over his face, sighing deep, and you blink. Once, twice.
You've always prided yourself on your brains—not everyone gets to be in charge of all the computing for a Formula 1 car—but right now, you are all utterly lost.
"Carlos, I... I don't get it." Or maybe you do, heart thumping in your ears, but you're too scared you might be wrong.
"In any other life I would've asked you out on a date." This time he speaks more slowly, more purposefully, too. Like he's imbuing every syllable with the depth of his confession. "But it kills me that it can't be this one."
"... Why not?" you tentatively ask after an instant, feigning not to notice how his hand is now resting on the back of your sofa, right next to your ear and neck.
"Because you're a senior engineer! That would be like... like dating Ricky. Even if you're much prettier than Ricky. But you don't need to tell him that," he adds with a nervous laugh, which you mirror; though you fall silent as soon as his hand comes to rest on your shoulder, right where your collar ends, millimeters away from your skin. His body's warring with his own words... one wants to resist, the other to give in. "What if I leave Ferrari? That's a crazy conflict of interest."
"That's a silly idea, you're not leaving Ferrari anytime soon. Are you?"
"I don't know, it's... hypothetically... you know what I mean," he exhales in defeat. His hand clasps a little tighter on your shoulder, his scent dizzying, closer than ever before. Can he feel your frantic heart thumping underneath your skin? If he keeps licking his lips like this, will he sense your breathing getting more erratic?
"I do. But... the problem is I like you too, Carlos."
If embers could burn back to life, light a hearth out of nothingness... they wouldn't shine as bright as Carlos' eyes just then.
"Don't mess with me."
"I'm not messing with you. Why wouldn't I like you?"
"Because you're not supposed to have a favorite."
"I won't tell Fred if you don't."
He laughs, a brittle but adorable little thing, like a small bird taking its first flight. If you could hear the sound more often, see that bashful smile on his handsome face more every day... you wouldn't need any other prince to die in war for.
His hand runs down your arm, his thumb lightly caressing your skin through the fabric of your shirt before he grabs your shaky hand in his.
"Now's not the best time, but... I think we've got to have an important conversation after the race tomorrow," his deep, soft tone pacifying you just as much as the abstract shapes he traces on the back of your hand.
"After you win, you mean."
"Right. After I get my surprise, no?"
"After you win," you repeat with a grin, and he squeezes your hand, smiling too. Something, deep down, tells him he'll win regardless of the race result.
"Cosa diavolo sta facendo?"
Even in spite of the roaring crowd and the bellowing V8s speeding down the straight, the dumbfounded voices around the pit wall come to you clear as day.
"Russell 1.4 behind Lando," Ricky, sitting on the other side of Vasseur, speaks into his headset.
The team principal keeps quiet, eyes fixed on the cascade of numbers and brackets on your screen. He understands before the rest of the wall what his driver is doing; and as you relay all the information you get to the race engineers, you understand it too.
"Lando .8 behind, .8 behind with DRS—Russell no DRS... Copy that."
He's doing it on purpose. Keeping Norris just close enough to shield him from the Mercs while making sure he can't catch up. You'd laugh in triumph and disbelief if you weren't gritting your teeth so damn hard, heart on the verge of exploding as the last laps tick out in a blur.
Just a few more minutes. Just a few more seconds, and the night sky over Marina Bay will explode in crimson lights...
Mechanics spring to their feet and climb the wall to the track, bumping their fists in the air. Cheers, claps, exclamations, a bouquet of red roses swaying in the wind to greet its champion at the finish line. And then, the unmistakable roar of a racecar speeding past the chequered flag at three hundred kilometers an hour. Liberation.
You spring to your feet right as the fireworks go off, yelling to the sky. Carlos won. Carlos won! Your Carlos—in the middle of Red Bull's flawless season...
"¡Vamos Fred! ¡Vamos Ricky!" Flashes of red and gold pass his high spirits by, diligently braking into the first corner.
He laughs, he screams it all out, unclenching all his muscles, woozy from the G's, from the adrenaline, from the win... from you, watching him from the pit wall. From the memory of your skin against his, your adoring eyes and the formidable lightness inside his chest that has him feeling like he's the king of the world.
In a few minutes, he'll be posing with his trophy and the team in front of his P1 plaque for the group photo, and he'll drench you in champagne—your lively laughter will fill his heart with the gold of medals. And later in the evening, before the afterparty, he'll pull you aside and tell you maybe this victory has made him reckless, and he'll kiss you senselessly like a prize he fought for.
For now, though, he's nodding his head at Lando who gave him a congratulatory wave from his car when his on-board screen lights up with an unexpected message. Glowing red letters read, "Great job, smooth operator! 🌶️" Laughter escapes him as small virtual fireworks go off on his screen... and he presses the radio button on his steering wheel.
"Did she have one of these ready for Charles too?"
A few seconds of white noise, and then, your mischievous voice, dripping with joy.
"You know me, Carlos. Never play favorites."
… f1 taglist; @retvenkos @giuseppe-yuki (want to be added? send me an ask!)
#f1#f1 x y/n#f1 x you#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 fic#carlos sainz#carlos sainz x y/n#carlos sainz x you#carlos sainz x reader#cs55 imagine#cs55 fic#cs55 x reader#cs55#mywriting#this got so much longer than i had originally planned lol <3
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Luck. (P2)
Cregan Stark x reader; Robb Stark x reader
Summary: the reader finds herself back with Cregan, and she's beginning to feel something for the past Wolf of the North.
Warnings: unwanted advances, talk of gore, consensual kissing that leads to the start of... some other stuff
Part 1, Part 3
Masterlist
...................................................
Two weeks back with Robb, and it seemed that she was beginning to forget about the interactions with Cregan entirely.
She had hit her head, after all. Maybe her mind had simply messed with her.
Robb had noted that something was amiss with her, but he knew better than to pry. When she was ready, perhaps she'd come to him.
"The History of the Wolf. That's an ancient book, that is." Robb mused with a grin as he entered the library.
She turned her head and snapped the book shut in surprise. "Oh… I… I had no idea."
Robb's smile grows and he walks to her, "Interested in Stark history, are you?"
Her face showed a look as if she'd been caught in a crime. "I… I just wish to know more about you and your house is all."
"That's admirable," Robb said. He leaned forward and kissed her cheek, his stubble scraping her as he did so.
"You must shave," she said instinctively with a laugh. "It is like rubbing sand across my face, Robb."
He chuckled. It was the first time in two weeks that she had jested with him like she had before that day in the Godswood. He loved her most like this.
He brought at hand to his face, "Shave? Or perhaps I shall grow it into a great beard!"
She laughed and took his face in her hand, "Only when I am long gone will you have a beard, Stark."
He tilted his head playfully and a tint came to his eyes, "Or perhaps I will just make you watch the hairs grow by the day."
Her hands moved to his chest with a playful shove, "Don't torture me so!"
His smirk grew, "I will torture you how I see fit, my love."
"You shan't catch me then!"
Abandoning the book in her hands, she began to sprint from the library.
Robb watched her go with a playful grin before willing his legs to run as well.
She held her skirt up in one hand, rounding each corridor half—hazardly.
Robb had longer legs, but he had to admit she was a quick little thing.
She made the mistake of turning around once to see where he was, only to find him a few paces behind.
She let out a surprised laugh, and quickly set herself on track again.
Even as they ran passed the staff, the servants paid no heed.
The Lord and Lady of Winterfell were much in love, and seeing such things were common.
Finally down one corridor, she looked over her shoulder.
She had managed just a bit of distance from Robb.
She grinned wickedly as she rounded the corner from him.
Into a stone wall it seemed.
She fell onto the ground from the force.
"Gods, my love," a voice commented.
Cregan Stark.
He knelt down and quickly brought a hand to the back of her head. He was holding back a chuckle, "That was quite a hit. Are you alright?"
She nodded quickly, "Fine." Her hand came up to her forehead, "Just fine."
"Let's get you up then," he chuckled. "I can't have the staff whispering of why the Lord and Lady were on the dirt ridden floor of the corridor."
He helped her up, keeping a hand under one arm to guarantee her balance. When she was indeed balanced, he let go, "Running from Brandon, I assume? A game of some sorts?"
She took a few steps back to look down the corridor she had just run down.
Robb was gone.
"Yes," she lied. "I'm to be hiding."
"Well," he smiled. "I can't have him catching you, can I?" He held out his arm for her to take.
With one last look to the place Robb had once stood, she took Cregan's arm.
…
After an hour or two of enjoying the other's company over a light lunch, Cregan gave a light sigh and stood from the chair. "I must attend to the people. I shall come collect you-"
She reached out and grabbed his hand, "May I accompany you?"
"You wish to… accompany me out?" He was a bit shocked from her request.
"Please, my lord. I truly wish to."
That seemed to make something wash over Cregan. He blinked suddenly and nodded, "Get in something warmer. There's quite a heavy chill out there."
…
The two had journeyed out of the Winterfell walls.
Cregan had promised to help a farmer days before, and was now making true to his promise.
A Stark never breaks an oath, after all.
So the two on his horse, as well as some ten men behind them set out to the man's farm.
The man was welcoming and kind, beyond grateful for the help. He was an older man and held a deep regard for the younger Stark man.
As they entered his home, Cregan grimaced, "What exactly do you believe the problem to be?"
The man shrugged, "I wanted to believe wildlings, my lord. But… wildlings do not kill as viciously as these deaths have been. No man is willing to work for me because of it."
Cregan's eyes wandered over to her, who had distracted herself with the man's dog- a long haired shepherd dog who had no idea that one of the most influential woman in the North was the one scratching behind his ears.
"You said the East side of your land?" Cregan asked.
"Yes, my lord."
"Very well." Cregan turned to his men. "Go saddle up. Have your swords at the ready." He turned to the older man, "You'll lead us there."
The man nodded, "On my honor, my lord."
She stood now, her attention lost from the dog to Cregan.
"No," he began as soon as they made eye contact. "You'll stay here. I'll not have you out in that."
"Cregan," she sighed. "I'll be with you. That's as safe as-"
"-My lady," the older man began. "If I may. I found one of my men without a throat in that field. We shan't have that for our lady."
Cregan nodded along with him, "You're to stay, my love."
She nodded, "That's fine."
"If it helps, my older son should come around soon. He'll keep you company," the older man said.
She nodded again with a forced smile, "That sounds lovely. I shall remain."
Cregan gave a soft sigh, "Just for a few hours." He pulled her to him and placed a kiss to the crown of her head.
…
The man's son did come after an hour or two, walking into his home sweaty and tired.
It took him a while to notice the lady's presence.
He immediately began to apologize, "Lady Stark. Forgive me… I did not-"
She laughed lightly, "-There is nothing to forgive. I am the stranger in your home, not the other way around."
He nodded. He then took a moment to see her in front of him. "Believe me or not, I've never seen the lady of Winterfell before. And now that I have, I've not seen a pretty lady in all of the North."
His words took her by surprise. "Oh. Those are quite flattering words."
He smiled and shrugged, "I would not lie to a lady. You're lovely. Lord Stark has been blessed by the gods to have you."
"How did you know it was I if you've never seen me?" She asked with a teasing smile.
"Your cloak, my lady." He pointed to it, "Stark sigil on it."
She looked down to indeed to the pin on it with the wolf of Stark on it. "Ah. I see."
"Tell me, my lady, why you are in our home unaccompanied?"
"My husband and his men are with your father dealing with your… problem. In the east field, I believe?"
The man's eyes lit with recognition, "Is he? I had no idea he'd be here today or I would have welcomed him. And accompanied him as well. I do apologize."
She shrugged, "Cregan does not care for propriety. Do not worry yourself."
"Perhaps I may just… keep you company here then until their return?"
She smiled, "I'd like that."
…
The man, who she had learned was named Johnathan Glover, was lovely at first. Easy to converse with, and not overbearing towards her.
But it quickly shifted.
He had slowly moved his chair closer to her. His hands would wander. His eyes grew sultry.
And soon, she was becoming uncomfortable.
"Something wrong, my lady?" He asked.
"No. Worried for Cregan, is all."
"You seem so tense." He sighed. Johnathan stood up and rounded her chair to stand behind her. His hand moved to her shoulders and she immediately tensed more.
"You need to relax," he whispered in her ear. He began to massage her shoulder, pushing a little too harshly into her shoulder blades.
"He… he will return at any moment," she had tried to reason.
The man smiled, "I know."
A kiss was placed on her neck.
She froze in place for a moment.
This man would die at Cregan's hand.
Robb was a merciful man, but the man's payment would have been just the same under his watch.
"Stop," she commanded.
"This is what I'm speaking of," the man continued with another kiss to her neck, "So tense."
She moved to stand, but he held her down by her shoulders.
The door swung open suddenly and Cregan stood in the doorway.
Bloody and caked in dirt, Cregan Stark stood with a set jaw at the sight before him.
She stood this time, managing to get away from the man's hands and goes to Cregan, "Are you hurt?"
But his eyes didn't move from Johnathan's. His voice was low, "I'm fine." His gloved hands covered in grime grabbed her wrist. "Let's go."
He pulled her from the home with no words uttered to anyone except a whisper to one of his men. The man nodded and moved into the house as the Starks left.
…
"I leave you to slay wolves and yet I had left you in the jaws of one," Cregan huffed as he pulled off his boots.
"It is alright. I am fine, Cregan." She tried to reason.
"No. No, do not give me pity. I left you alone there. I should have known better."
She sighed as she began to pull at her corset strings. "You could not have known that. You were tending to your people, as you should."
Cregan paused at her words, his hands gripping the bottom of his tunic. "I should be tending to you."
She pulled off her corset with a tug, "Then do so."
His eyes darkened as his eyes roamed over her body, "So I shall."
Cregan neared her, carefully and slowly pulling her various garments from her until she was left in nothing but her shift.
He smiled and let his hands grip her waist, "You are a Stark." His thumbs traced lightly, "I can't have others believing otherwise."
She stepped a bit closer, nearing her face with his, "I will always be a Stark."
He leaned in the rest of the way, connecting their lips in a soft kiss.
But he paused for moment, "I'm filthy, my love. Perhaps we should wait-"
But she had pulled him to her, cutting him off with a kiss once more.
The kiss was everything that Cregan wasn't- soft, delicate, careful, and needy.
He let out a soft groan when she pulled the hair at the back of his neck.
Cregan led the two towards the bed, carefully placing her on the furs. Only then did their lips part, and his began to trace down her face. His voice was soft as he spoke, "I'll banish any trace of that man from you."
She hummed as he kissed down her neck, exactly where the man had kissed her only hours before. But unlike then, she was completely relaxed under Cregan's gaze.
She could feel his smile against her neck.
"May I have you tonight, my love?" He asked softly.
She paused her thoughts for a moment.
She was stuck in time with Cregan. Her husband.
Was it wrong to Robb?
He noted her hesitation and pushed himself up to look at her, "Don't fret about it. I won't be upset with you."
Her hesitation continued.
He nodded and one of his hands wandered down her body, "May I pleasure you, at least?"
He wanted to…
She felt herself nod before she could register why.
His smile was bright, "Thank you, my love."
Much like Cregan himself, his kisses became calculated and neat. He did nothing on a whim. The kisses began to trail down her body, over her clothing.
When they reached lower, he grabbed her thighs and pulled her legs up.
A final look into her eyes, "You're sure?"
Another nod from her, "Please, Cregan."
His hand began to pull her thin shift up, "Of course, pretty."
With her shift stretched across her thighs, she couldn't see Cregan once he disappeared behind it. His touch on her thighs left for a moment.
She closed her eyes and waited for the feeling to begin.
But instead she felt a cold chill run down her.
And the sound of the door opening.
Her eyes shot open.
Robb ran in, panting. She paused when he saw her and his jaw dropped a bit.
His beautiful wife in nothing but her shift, legs open on the furs of their bed.
"So, this is where you ran off to, is it?" He grinned.
When she didn't answer from shock, he continued, "I don't know how you managed this so quickly, but you shall hear no complaint from me." He stepped toward her like a predator, "My wife just waiting for me to catch her? So eagerly waiting on me?"
Robb approached the foot of the bed. He grabbed the top of her thighs, "Well, guess what, my love?" He pulled her down the bed and to him. His voice lowered, "I've caught you."
"You have." She finally managed to pant out.
His eyes roamed over her completely, "So pretty," he muttered. "And all mine." He caressed her face, "Who do you belong to?"
"I…" she paused, thrown off by his question.
His voice became a heated growl, "Who do you belong to, love?"
"The… the Wolf of the North." She whispered to him.
He grinned, "Yes, you do."
But she couldn't help but remember the feeling of Cregan's hands on her not only moments ago.
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A/N: I think I'm about to start doing some Aemond x reader stuff- comment if you want on that tag list! Or the tag list for this fic since I'm guessing I'll be doing a part 3
Taglist: @rlblackbarbie, @rebeccawinters
#cregan stark x y/n#cregan stark x you#cregan x reader#cregan stark x reader#cregan stark#game of thrones x y/n#game of thrones x reader#game of thrones imagine#game of thrones fanfiction#game of thrones#house of the dragon fanfiction#house of the dragon#robb stark x you#robb stark x reader#robb stark fanfic#robb stark imagine
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☆-《 The Stakes 》-☆
[A/N: Workload has been a bitch and a half to get through, and I can't focus on writing my WIP abt Lilia, so here's a little drabble to feed the gays. I saw these (1, 2, 3) clips of Patti in her younger days, and it just did ✨️something✨️ to me. I hope ya'll enjoy it! I'll probably make a part 2 sometime soon.
UPDATE: PART 2 HERE!!!
]
Warning/s: Slight NSFW (?)
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
"Lilia, darling." (Y/N) softly called out to her beloved. "Come to bed, would you?"
"I shall soon, amore. As soon as I finish my bath."
(Y/N), an immortal vampire, wasn't really that patient. After all, she'd been alive for a century before she'd meet Lilia. She blew a raspberry, a habit she'd picked up the more she frequented local pubs.
"Really, you seem to forget yourself, (Y/N). You are a countess, not a commoner."
"And I also should've been wedded to a count, yet here I am passing the nights in the quarters of a princess at her request. Tell me, darling, who is forgetting themselves, hm?"
(Y/N) could hear Lilia's eye roll, even from a room away. "Help me wash my hair, then. So you wouldn't bore yourself out of your mind, amore."
Tighterning her robe, (Y/N) quickly padded her way over to the grand bathroom attached to Lilia's quarter. Peeking inside, she saw the girl, her damp hair hanging off the tub as she relaxed, the suds barely shielding (Y/N)'s desires.
"Took you long enough to ask, darling."
She sat on the chair beside the tub, usually occupied by the royal's lady-in-waiting, but Lilia had already sent them off for the night in hopes to have more time with (Y/N) to herself.
A melody floated through the air as (Y/N) began scrubbing through Lilia's scalp, courtesy of the young princess herself.
(Y/N)'s heart swelled as she was rinsing the bubbles off of her beloved's auburn locks. She couldn't help but stare; and if the suds were thinning out, that was no one's concern but theirs.
Lilia's eyes fluttered open, meeting (Y/N)'s gaze. Her neck hung over the edge of the golden bathtub, careful not to wet (Y/N)'s lap.
Her long, slender fingers took (Y/N)'s young face -- despite being older than her for at least a hundred years, (Y/N)'s face remained its youth. She caressed the bloodless cheeks of her beloved, slowly bringing her lips to meet (Y/N) in a quiet, yet passionate kiss.
"The ball is in a month." Lilia whispered against her lips. "I do not wish to attend, amore. There'll be the roaming eyes of men and the chattering mouth of the maidens."
"Amore, we must. After that, we shall have the winter amongst ourselves, kindling fires by the library."
"Yes, but--" Lilia whined as (Y/N) stood up to get her robe.
"I want you."
(Y/N) softened at the suddeness of Lilia's words. "You already have me, darling."
"I want you. I want to be yours. I want to go to the ball with you. I do not want to pretend to be interested in whatever pompous suitor my father will find me. I just want you. I want to tell the whole world that I am yours, and you are mine."
By this time, Lilia had stood up, sopping wet from the bath, inching forward to the countess.
It wasn't the first time that (Y/N) had seen Lilia unclothed. But this time, (Y/N)'s mouth went dry, the need for blood clawing at her throat.
Still the ever wary countess, (Y/N) only raised an eyebrow at the display of her beloved. "Darling, you shan't forget yourself. You are -- after all -- a princess and not a commoner."
Young and brash, while Lilia was the epitome of grace, her emotions were still raw; impulses flowing through her veins.
"(Y/N)..." Her voice turned into a whisper. "I saw."
"Saw what, my love?" (Y/N) answered, wrapping the robe and her arms around Lilia's frail form. She placed a gentle kiss at the young girl's temple.
But only a whimper escaped Lilia's lips.
"There was a commotion," Lilia gripped (Y/N)'s arm, drawing it even tighter around her frame. She sobbed, pain emnant in her voice. "You... Amore, you were struck. I dreamt of it last night, and I do not wish for it to happen."
After her coven had disappeared, Lilia had tried to push away her powers. But there was something about (Y/N), something that caused sleepless nights for the princess. She saw glimpses of her future to come. She searched for her countess amongst the flashes of memories of tomorrow, yet her beloved's face never quite appeared. It wracked Lilia to her core, the thought of her beloved leaving her early.
"Shh... Do not fret, my love. I promise to stay close to you tomorrow. Would that be alright?"
Lilia ran her hand up and down (Y/N)'s arm, lip between her teeth, and lashes dampened with her tears. There was a pause before she nodded, not wanting to get into trouble with her father.
"Dont leave me, my love." Lilia whispered, whirring around to face the woman. She cupped her cheeks, searching for the sincerity in her eyes.
(Y/N) then brought up her own hand over Lilia's, nodding and kissing the hand in hers. "I promise, amore."
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I. "Do You Trust Me?"
"Trust" Series Masterlist
John "Bucky" Egan x WAC!Female Reader
A slight against one of your dearest friends causes you to act wildly out of character, and Bucky finds himself stepping up to save you as he realizes just what you mean to him after months of seemingly innocuous encounters.
Warnings: Language, Period Typical Sexism, References to Cheating, Reader Knees a Man in the Groin, Perceived Threats of Violence, Plenty of Kissing, Inevitable Historical and Military Inaccuracies, Rating - T.
Author’s Note: Well here we are, watching me write for this show before it's fully aired. Blame/credit to @precious-little-scoundrel and her anon for infecting my brain. Reader has an unnamed brother for sake of plot, no descriptions or y/n used. Events of this fic take place a few days before the horrific Regensburg mission. Also I recognize that WACs did not arrive in the ETO until July of 1943, this fact does not seem to have influenced Hanks/Spielberg so I shan't let it influence me either. This is a work of fiction based off the portrayal by the actors in the Apple TV+ series. I hold nothing but respect for the real life individuals referenced within.
Word Count: 4217
-------------------------
The pub was crowded, as usual, and Bucky leaned back in his chair as Curt regaled their table with another one of his stories from Walla Walla. The press of uniform clad bodies, damp from the summer rain outside, created a humid atmosphere. But as he tipped the last few drops of Scotch whisky from his glass into his mouth, he was certain there was nowhere else he’d rather be.
Buck had decided to sit this one out, wanting to catch up on his latest letter to Marge. His mouth ticked up at the corners as he reflected once again on how different he and his friend were from one another. Glancing at the bar while he contemplated fetching the next round, Bucky’s eyes widened as they fell on the last person he would ever expect to see in a pub. It took him a moment to recognize you in such an unusual environment, hair perfectly styled. He noted that you were even wearing makeup as your teeth sank into your brightly painted lower lip, wending your way through the crowd, clearly on a mission.
“Bucky are you even listening?” Curt chided with a sharp jab of his elbow into his upper arm.
“Yeah absolutely,” He nodded firmly, unable to take his eyes off you, “every word.” He tacked on as his gaze followed you across the room on your approach to the notorious flirt from 349th squadron, Arthur “Red” Jameson.
He was vaguely aware of the doubtful scoff his reply had earned as his eyes narrowed. Wasn’t your friend Mary rather serious about Red? Not that Red bothered limiting himself to any one woman, local or American – there were few limits that smug redhead put on his relations with the fairer sex. Perhaps that was why Bucky was feeling particularly annoyed with how close you had come to stand next to him at the bar. With the way you were smiling at him. You hardly ever smiled, had to be one of the most serious, reserved women he had ever encountered here in England or back home.
It was when you ducked your head to peer up at Red through your lashes that the realization hit him – you were fucking flirting with him. His fingers clenched tightly on his empty glass, fingertips blanched white as the strength of his grip drove the blood from the flesh there. A slow, knowing smile unfurled across Red’s face as he leaned in, his hand landing on your shoulder making Bucky’s teeth grind together almost painfully as he was flooded with proprietary rage.
The intensity of it startled him, made him take a sharp breath and relax his grip on the glass. Where in the hell had that come from?! The pair of you had spoken no more than a handful of times, simple interactions in the Operations Room of the Control Tower back when he was Air Exec, around the base, or most recently, that afternoon when you had lent him a copy of one of his favorite books, but it wasn’t like you were close. You were quiet, overshadowed by your boisterous friends Mary, Ruth, and that brunette whose name escaped him just then. They were always outgoing at dances while you did an excellent job of decorating the wall. It certainly was not like you were anything more than colleagues. Objectively that was the truth, however, as Bucky sat there watching you grin at that man…
The final straw came as your lips nearly brushed against Red’s ear, making that bastard’s eyes shoot wide, sending Bucky surging to his feet. He narrowly missed one of the low beams overhead as he glared across the crowded room at the cozy pair you and Red presented at the bar.
“Jesus Christ Bucky, did something jump up and bite your ass?!” Curt barked in surprise, the rest of the table laughing loudly in response.
Bucky barely heard them as his new vantage point allowed him a clear view of your knee colliding painfully with the apex of Red’s thighs, causing him to crumple against the bar as you bolted out the back door. Bucky stared after you, just as bewildered as Red’s friends, before they charged out the door in your wake.
“God dammit.” He muttered under his breath before climbing over his friends to make a dash for the front entrance of the pub, his cap clutched in his hand.
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Your Women’s Auxiliary Army Corp unit had arrived at Thorpe Abbots in late May, part of the first battalion of WAACs sent overseas. Assigned to the Eight Air Force, you had spent roughly a week with your British counterparts of the Women’s Auxiliary Air Force observing missions on other bases before it had come time to establish the base for the 100th.
Fast, accurate typing skills and a calm, quiet temperament had seen you promptly assigned as a clerk in the Operations Room, one of the tensest and most chaotic places on the entire base. Upon your arrival at training camp in Fort Des Moines, you had been adopted by a trio of far more outgoing women – Mary from Miami, a sun-kissed blonde who managed to look that way no matter what the weather; Ruth from Pittsburgh, a black-haired beauty who was manufactured from the steel her hometown was known for; and Violet from Savannah, a brunette who elongated every vowel like the southern belle she was.
Why they chose to waste any of their precious time on you was as much as mystery to you in England as it had been in Iowa, and yet any time you tried to convince them you would be perfectly happy sitting out a dance in your barracks with a book instead, they were adamant you attend. Bodily removed you from your cot to join them – not that you were one for dancing, even with the most handsome of airmen. And that title would most certainly have to be bestowed upon Major John Egan. Perhaps a bit of a rogue and more-often-than-not a little too deep into his cups, there was something undeniably charming about him. A magnetism that drew every woman on the base, and from across all of East Anglia, to him. The handsome devil knew it, too. Of course he did, that was, alas, also part of his charm.
Your trio of outgoing friends had gravitated toward him immediately, traded their fair share of coy looks and dances with him while you looked on quietly from the sidelines. He never really seemed to form that deep a connection with any of them, with any woman for that matter, but that did not deter the female population from trying to be the one to catch his eye for a bit of fun. It was during the long hours of the 100th’s first mission, while he was still serving as Air Exec, that you’d had your first occasion to speak to the man directly.
In the middle of one of the tense periods of waiting for news, he had poked his head into the office to see if anything had come across the teletype or wireless and you had looked up, meeting his eye. He was wearing his sheepskin coat, a striking combination of ivory and cognac colored leather that would have honestly looked absurd on anyone else, yet on him just seemed to belong over his dress uniform.
“Can I help you, Major Egan?” You had asked, fingers poised above your typewriter as you paused your progress in typing up a report for Colonel Huglin.
He had looked at you, startled a moment. “I was convinced you might actually be unable to speak. Glad to know I was wrong. It’s Bucky by the way. Just checking if there were any updates?”
“We’ll be sure to get them to you as soon as we have them, sir.” You had replied professionally, trying to ignore the warmth unfurling beneath your breastbone at having his attention directly solely upon you.
“That’s all I can ask then, thank you.” He had winked before slipping out of the room and heading back towards the plotting map.
It had not taken long for a series of updates to arrive, both by radio and over the teletype and being the highest-ranking clerk in the office, third officer, it was your duty to run them out to him. Grabbing both sheets of paper, you had quickly made your way across the room, startled to find him striding towards you, meeting you halfway. “Here you are Major Egan.”
“Touchdown.” He had grinned and taken them over to review with the others as you had hurried back to your office, gnawing on the inside of your cheek to hide your smile.
You had been admittedly saddened when he had been demoted to squadron commander of the 418th after Colonel Harding assumed command of 100th. For selfish reasons, certainly – your interactions had become increasingly limited after this point – but also because it meant he was more frequently put into harm’s way. Every time he went up in a fort, you found focusing on the job at hand more and more difficult. Unlike the ground crews or the brass, it was not looked upon kindly for the WACs to go running outside to see which forts had come back. Which airmen were injured. Sometimes it would take hours for you to confirm that he was all right, and only then by way of hearsay.
You had still run into Major Egan from time to time, while walking with your group of friends to the WAC mess for dinner – by mid-July you were now serving in the Women’s Army Corp as a 2nd Lieutenant, or after meetings in the Operations Room when he was not flying missions. But the longest conversation you ever had was during one of your breaks earlier that very afternoon. It was an uncharacteristically sunny day, and with no mission in progress you had decided to take your coffee break outside, behind the control tower, sitting on one of the benches the ground crew had built out of scrap wood.
Before you had enlisted, your brother had bought you a copy of his favorite book, one he had never let you read before because you were ‘just a kid’ but now that you were old enough to sign up for the service yourself, he had decided you could have your own copy. With just two pages left, it seemed the perfect way to break up the morbid tallies you had been typing up in the grim office upstairs, and you had just finished the final sentence when a shadow fell over you.
“Now how did you get a copy of my favorite book?”
You had lifted your eyes quickly, squinting slightly into the bright sun that shone from behind him, to see Major Egan standing there.
“Major Egan. You like Guys and Dolls, sir?” You had asked, startled.
“How many times do I gotta tell you it’s Bucky.” He had stepped out of the sunlight to sit beside you carefully. “I love everything by Damon Runyon. Which story did you like the best?” He had leaned in curiously.
Pursing your lips to think over the collection of stories you had just finished, you smiled briefly as the answer came to you. “’Madame La Gimp.’ Where they pass off the bag lady –”
“As a society matron! Yes!” Major Egan chimed in, laughing as he nodded in agreement.
“What…about yours?” You had swallowed, unable to stop yourself.
“God, I haven’t read this book in forever…” he had reached out for it, and you had set it in his hands easily.
He had sucked his teeth in thought as he turned it over in his broad hands. “It’s gotta be a tie between ‘Blood Pressure’ and ‘Hold ‘Em Yale’…ah but ‘Lemon Drop Kid’ is excellent, too.” As he had spoken, he had begun to gesture with the book to emphasize his words, making you press your lips together fondly.
“You can borrow it if you’d like.” You had blurted out before you could stop yourself. “Give me a definitive answer once you’ve read it again.”
Major Egan had looked to you quickly. “Really? But what if…how will I know to get it back to you?” He had raised an eyebrow.
“My name’s on the front page.” You had nodded reassuringly but swallowed tightly as he opened the cover as if to confirm it for himself.
“‘Hey Sis,’” He had begun to read the inscription he found there, bringing your brother’s words to life, “‘lighten up, would you? You don’t have to be so damned serious all the time. See you on the other side.’” He had paused a moment before his eyes had met yours, caught you watching him, before you quickly looked down at the grass at your feet. “Where is he?” he had asked quietly.
“On a ship in the Pacific, somewhere.” You had replied softly, finding each blade of grass infinitely fascinating.
“Are you sure–” He had begun to ask before the sound of your name being called by your very impatient Captain, a woman even Major Egan knew not to waylay, interrupted the peaceful afternoon.
You had leapt to your feet. “You’ll get it back to me.” You had nodded and rushed back inside, believing every word of it.
You had seriously contemplated sharing your encounter with at least Ruth, the more level-headed of your friends, knowing she was the least likely to conflate the exchange with a marriage proposal. But as you returned to your barracks that night, you frowned deeply to find Mary in tears on her cot. After much soothing and rocking in your arms, she finally managed to open up, sharing what had gotten her so upset.
“It’s Red…I caught him out back necking with one of those doughnut truck girls…” She hiccupped and dabbed at her nose with her hanky.
“Oh Mary, I’m so sorry.” You frowned, smoothing her hair back from her forehead.
“Oh god, I can’t believe I let that creep talk me into sleeping with him!” She wailed, fresh tears boiling over onto her cheeks as she sagged onto your shoulder, sobbing anew.
Every muscle in your body tensed as her outburst sunk in, the depth of his betrayal fully registering as Vi and Ruth returned from the end of their shifts in the weather office and Mary launched herself into their arms to fill them in as well. The level of pure fury that seized your body was utterly foreign to you and, unlike the descriptions you had encountered in literature to date, felt utterly icy in your veins. As your friends gently coaxed Mary to the latrines to get herself cleaned up, you hung back, a plan formulating quickly in your mind. Your life without these women would have been lonely, all but intolerable, and this transgression against one of them could not go unanswered. You could not look at yourself in the mirror if you did nothing.
Digging quickly through Mary’s belongings, you found her most alluring shade of lipstick, carefully but efficiently applying it to your lips before unpinning and redoing your hair into a more fashionable shape rather than the more utilitarian style you normally wore. Lastly you added a flick of mascara to your eyelashes and rouge to your cheeks. All this was accomplished using the tiny mirror Vi had set up on the shelf beside her bed. Nodding once in satisfaction, for it was truly the best you could do in a solo effort, you darted out the door, lipstick tube in your pocket for reapplications, if necessary. The cad would never see it coming from you, you just needed to figure out a way to get close enough.
Fortunately, the years you had spent on the sidelines watching the three masters of feminine wiles at work had afforded you quite the education. It was only a matter of finding the perpetrator to enact your revenge. You located him in the second pub you visited, taking a slow breath as your eyes sought him out in the crowded, humid space. The rain had thankfully stopped before your foray out into the night, though the streets remained wet, and you had taken the time to refresh your lipstick and tidy your hair before stepping inside. Your heart began to race as your veins flooded with adrenaline.
‘Easy now. Slow and smooth like Mary, give him that flirty smile she’s famous for.’ You thought to yourself.
As his eyes met yours it was all you could do not to wince back in disgust – you were going to need to hide your dislike better.
‘Pretend he’s someone else. Who would you like him to be?’
You gulped shyly, teeth sinking into your lip at the thought of applying these skills to Major Egan, noting that Red seemed immediately more receptive as you slid up beside him where he stood at the bar.
“Evening, Red.” You smiled at him broadly, swallowing nervously as he echoed the expression warmly.
“Well good evening to you too. You escaped the base.” Red teased you.
You faked a giggle and tilted your head down before flicking your eyes to look up at him through your lashes, something Vi had weaponised to great effect on many an occasion. You tried not to shout in triumph as Red’s hand came to rest on your shoulder, leaning in closer.
“Can I buy you a drink, sugar?”
“Actually…” You smiled coyly before leaning in close to his ear, taking a slow breath before dropping all pretense from your tone. “Mess around with one of my friends again and I’ll cut it off.” You snarled into his ear before driving your knee into his groin as sharply as the straight lines of your uniform skirt would allow, slipping out of his grip as he slouched over the bar with a cry of pain.
You longed to bask in his suffering, in your triumph, but you also recognized you had to get out of there before the consequences of your actions found you. Spying a door propped open to a back alley over Red’s crumpled torso, you made a dash through the stunned corner of the pub and out into the night, pausing a moment before turning to the left, hoping it was the correct direction. You certainly wished you knew your way around town a little better.
Your heart was pounding so hard you were worried it might burst through the front of your WAC jacket as you neared the main street but there was an increasing ruckus behind you – surely Red’s friends in hot pursuit. Suddenly Major Egan appeared in front of you, seemingly out of nowhere, and grabbed your arm, pulling you around a corner and down a smaller alleyway.
“Do you trust me?” He asked quickly, glancing back towards the approaching sound of voices as he shuffled you backward, closer to the brick wall of the building behind you.
You nodded at him, speechless, breathing heavily from your flight. Your uniform cap felt precarious where it was perched on your rapidly falling hairstyle. Major Egan’s aftershave was flooding your senses due to his sheer proximity.
“I’m going to kiss you now.” He whispered as his eyes met yours, his own cap at a dangerous angle atop his dark curls, defying gravity.
He shifted forward to crowd your space, your eyes shooting wide as his forearms lifted to press against the wall on either side of your face, body shielding you from view. He bowed his head to press his lips against yours softly, making your eyelids flutter closed, doing nothing to slow the erratic beating of your heart. He tasted a little bit like whiskey, which had reminded you of gasoline the few times you’d had the misfortune of sipping it, but on his plush lips, it was not so bad.
Your hands balled into fists in the olive drab fabric of your skirt, heat painting its way across your cheeks and down your neck as the coarse hair that decorated his upper lip brushed against your skin. It was all too tempting to lose yourself in the feeling of him surrounding you, protecting you, kissing you. Reality reared its ugly head, making you inhale sharply through your nose as you heard the crowd of men stampede right past you muttering angrily.
“That damn cold fish from operations…”
“Who the fuck does she think she is?!”
“No wonder she ain’t got nobody.”
Pulling back from his lips, you frowned down at your brown uniform shoes, still hidden within the cage of his arms.
“Hey…” He murmured, bowing his head to nudge your nose with his, drawing your gaze back up as you swallowed shyly at the tender gesture. “Don’t listen to ‘em.” He urged you, his blue eyes so very dazzling and disarming at this range, even in the dim light of black-out conditions.
“I…It’s ok,” you breathed as you shook your head. “I know I’ll never be…” you furrowed your brow, not even sure what word you were searching for.
“Anything other than perfect, doll?” His lopsided grin was devastating, made it hard to breathe, though that may have also been his continued proximity. He leaned in for another kiss, but you lifted a shaky hand to press against his shoulder.
“Th…they’re gone you don’t have to pretend…” You murmured sadly, shifting to stand, but he did not move an inch, his breath brushing against your cheeks.
“I’m going to kiss you now because I want to, doll.” He murmured, eyes tracing over your face while giving you a moment to respond.
You were, however, frozen, staring at him again and so he pressed his lips firmly to yours, making your fingers curl slightly around the lapel of his uniform jacket. He hummed softly in response, pressing you back against the wall as he slanted his mouth tighter to yours, his hands moving to cup your cheeks. Shivering at the heat of his palms against your skin, you slowly lifted your other hand from your skirt, stretching it towards him, letting it hover between you tentatively.
He dropped his right hand from your cheek to guide your arm around his waist before sliding his own hand to splay against your lower back, drawing a whimper from your throat as you arched slightly.
He pulled back from your lips, chest heaving. “Christ, doll, you have no idea what you do to me.”
“Bucky?” You whispered, confused by his statement, finding it difficult to think clearly.
Bucky groaned and kissed you fiercely, licking at the seam of your lips, sliding his tongue to yours the instant you parted your lips for him. Toes curling in your shoes, you found yourself mewling into his mouth wantonly until he wrenched back suddenly, hand cupping the back of your head as he hugged you tightly into his chest. The sound of voices eventually registered in your addled brain – Red’s friends returning from their failed attempt to find you.
“If I had known all I had to do was kiss you senseless to get you to use my name…” Bucky teased once the coast was clear, panting into your hair.
You giggled against his throat, your own chest heaving as he loosened his hold on you. Your cap tumbled to the ground, fully dislodged by his attentions.
“It’s a burden I’m willing to bear.” He smirked, pressing his lips to your exposed forehead. “Let’s get you back to your barracks. What are you doing out here all dolled up kneeing idiots like Red in the goods anyway?” He asked as he bent to retrieve your cap, dusting it off and placing it in your outstretched hand before turning to slide his arm around your shoulders, leading you toward the main road.
You huffed with a frown as you walked with him, putting your cover back into place snuggly, crushing your once-stylish hair. “I didn’t appreciate the way he treated Mary.”
Bucky smirked at you “Your brother is right you know, you really do need to lighten up…you can just call him a good-for-nothing and be done with it. No need to write a formal treatise on his behavior.”
His lips stretched into a grin as that pulled another laugh from you. You turned to look at him properly and gasped.
“Bucky you have lipstick all over –”
“Perfect” He nodded proudly, cocky grin on his lips, and made no move to clean up his face, while you quickly wiped at yours, knowing you would have to face your barrack-mates. “Next time you go on an attack mission you let me know, alright, doll? I’ll fly on your wing anytime.” He winked at you, and you bit your lip shyly.
“Thank you, Bucky.” You swallowed and stopped walking, leaning in to press your lips to his cheek softly.
As you pulled back, Bucky flexed the arm he still had slung about your shoulders, hauling you in for another heart-stopping kiss, your hands coming to rest against his chest. You had a feeling that the rather lengthy walk back to base was only going to become exponentially longer and found you really did not mind at all.
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Read Part Two - "Just Had To Trust You."
"Trust" Series Masterlist
#john egan x reader#bucky egan x reader#john egan fic#john egan imagine#mota fanfic#masters of the air fanfiction
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It's in the kitchen of their shitty little 1.5 bedroom apartment that Eddie Munson continues to bemoan his roommates request for him to watch the 2024 Olympic Games with her this evening.
“Christine Henrietta Cunningham,” he starts with a sigh, wiping the reminentes of yet another YooHoo from his upper lip, leaning a narrow hip against the countertop's edge, “there is no way in hell you are getting me to watch the Olympics.”
Already wearing her team USA sweater, Chrissy tries to protest. Just as she did last night and the night before. For some reason thinking it's such a dire thing that Eddie watches the Olympics this year.
“First of all, not my middle name. Second-”
“You would literally have to glue my eyeballs open.”
“Second-” she tries again, voice stern, pointing a yellowed spoon in Eddie's direction as she dishes up a bowl of Kraft Dinner for them both.
“There is not now, nor will there ever be, any reason for me to watch juiced up jocks prance around and play any form of sportsball.”
There's so many reasons. Christ. Fuck. So many. But he's not telling Chrissy that. He'll watch the reruns when she's not home. He couldn't possibly be caught dead after last time.
“What about the swim-”
“Not even Gandalf himself,” Eddie interrupts, “-could convince me to waste my precious campaign planning time on such a thing.”
Following Chrissy to the living room, bowl of macaroni in hand, Eddie refuses to sit down next to her on the couch. He's not going to watch. Nope. Maybe sneak a peak in passing? Sure. But not watch. Are you kidding me?
“What a about To-”
The metal spoon that was once in Eddie's hand chatters to the floor as he mock gasps. Neon yellow noodles on the tile that the cat comes running over to clean up, Eddie stands in abject horror. She wouldn't dare.
“Don't you dare say what I think you're about to say, Christine. My 2020 not obsession with Tom Daley shan't be spoken of. It was merely a blip in the system. A glitch in the matrix.”
He still thinks Tom Daley can get it. But that's neither here nor there. And what is there, is simply between Eddie and the well used bottle of lotion next to his bed.
Chrissy rolls her eyes, now sitting with her legs crossed on their ugly ass thrifted couch, patting the cushion next to her as if Eddie's a dog. “Eddie you literally watched every one of his ra-”
Races?
“I did not.”
Okay maybe we wanted to. Who wouldn't? But it's not like he obsessively watched every one of the man's races.
“... I missed two.” He admits Inna whisper.
And what a sheer travesty that'd had been
“Oh yeah. You missed two. Oh Edward, how could I forget?” After patting the cushion mindlessly next to her again and eating a spoonful of macaroni she faux whines, “‘Oh Chrissy, would you record the race for me? I don't want to miss it.’”
He doesn't sound like that.
“I do not sound lik-”
All pathetic and whiney? Eddie Munson doesn't sound like that.
“As if I would believe you actually gave two shits about the races you giant homo.” Chrissy rolls her eyes so hard Eddie's surprised she doesn't hurt her neck, “You just liked seeing those boys in spandex.”
Well…. She's not wrong. Sports are dumb. People playing sports for money is dumb. What the Olympics does to those cities in the aftermath of the event is dumb.
But she's not wrong.
Spandex
“…. I hate you”
“No you don't.” She smiles, blowing Eddie a kiss.
“Um. Yes I do.”
As if he could ever hate Chrissy.
Avoiding making eye contact with her as she continues to pat the cushion next to her and turning heel towards the hall, Eddie decides maybe it's just best to eat his supper in his room. Away from jockey spandex and its temptations, “Anyways. As I was saying. Fuck you and your jocky hobbies Chrissy.” Eddie yells from the hall, “My time is far too valuable to be wasted mindlessly drooling over arrogant jocks and their-”
In a sing-songy voice Eddie hears Chrissy call from behind him, “You're gonna want to watch this!”
He groans, turning back around from the journey he'd just started in the direction of his room, “I would rather di-” only to be caught short when a familiar mole dotted, spandex covered ass makes its way across his TV screen.
He'd recognize that ass anywhere.
Went to every goddamn swim meet at the stupid community pool to see that beautiful ass in motion for years.
He fawned over it in the halls of Hawkins High.
Drooled over it on the odd days he actually attended gym class. Tried to solely avoid eye contact with it when he found it bare and within reach in the change rooms only an hour later.
Fuck.
Eddie's knees feel weak and before he knows it he's climbing over the back of the couch, bowl of macaroni in his lap and mirroring Chrissy's position. Legs crossed. Eyes glued to the TV. Mindlessly eating chemicals that some big corporation somehow manages to pass off as macaroni and cheese.
“Is that Steve Harrington?”
Oh look at those moles.
Beautiful.
Those pecs?
Fucking hell.
“Christine!?” Eddie screeches from his position on the couch when Chrissy doesn't answer, just simply shrugs and smirks at him. The little devil. “Did I just see Harrington?”
“Told you, you'd want to see this.”
#olympics#stranger things#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things ficlet#stranger things au#stranger things fan fiction#stranger things fandom#eddie munson#steve harrington#steddie#steddie fic#steddie fandom#steddie fanfiction#steve x eddie#eddie x steve#hellcheer#platonic soulmates#platonic hellcheer#chrissy cunningham#tom daley#roommates
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Why Aziraphale is an unreliable narrator
Part 1: The Story of Job
I'm absolutely not the first one to talk about this on here and I probably shan't be the last either. Alas, here's my take on why all of the minisodes in Season 2 should be enjoyed with great care – and taken with a grain of angelic salt.
I'm gonna split this into 3 parts, aka the three minisodes we are shown, since I tend to get a bit waffley in my posts and want to still be able to include all the little details. Once I've written them, I'll link Part 2 & Part 3 here as well!
Alright, let's get into it under the cut of doom.
Episode 2 opens with the Story of Job. Right off the bat, I noticed that it sort of looks like an old film playing. At first I didn't read that much into it, but once we see the cut-away to Aziraphale at the bookshop, currently reading that part of the Bible (presumably), I immediately thought: "Oh! It's because it's his memory. He's remembering how it went down and therefore it plays like a figurative film in his head."
This, I then came to realize, is a very crucial difference to all the flashbacks of S1, which were exclusively told and narrated by God. May her intensions be as ineffable as they are: She did tell us all of these stories from an objective outsider's point of view. Now, however, it's Aziraphale who's re-telling those stories to us from memory.
And if there's one thing that's for certain, it's that a memory is something entirely different to an objective narration of a story. Just think about how you yourself remember things. Especially things that happened years, maybe even decades (or, in an angel's case, millenia) ago. What is it, that you really remember? Can you know for sure, that a conversation was held with those exact words? Are you 100% certain that the clothes someone wore weren't different? Had it really been snowing or would that make very little sense given what you're remembering happened in May? And did it even happen in May? Or does that just happen to be your favourite month, the current weather, your preferred style of clothing and what it was that you would imagine someone would have said to you?
What I'm trying to say is: The further away it is that something happened, the more your brain has to fill in the gaps. This is why, for example, your parents will remember the family summer holiday entirely different when you ask them about it 20 years later.
"No, it was Sarah who puked on the car ride home!" "Nonsense, Sarah never puked as a child. Bobby had that gone-off pizza, he's the one that was sick the whole ride long!"
We've all been there. Bobby made it out alive. Don't buy gas station pizza.
Alright, back to the plot: Naturally, Aziraphale is not actually human, so it is a pure assumption on my part that the way his memory works is similar to ours. However, the whole topic of "memory" is actually quite a recurring one on Good Omens.
Crowley seems to have lost his in the Fall, yet somehow managed to get most of it back. Not all of it, though, he clearly has some major gaps ("You used to jump on me back, little monkey in the waistcoat!"). Beelzebub helps Gabriel store all his memories in their little fly container before they get wiped entirely too, by the Metatron and/or Saraqael. Crowley and Aziraphale (and possibly Jimbriel) perform a miracle together that makes everyone in Heaven and Hell forget who Garbiel is or what he looks like. And we know that the Book of Life apparently has the ability to completely erase someone from existence – ergo also erasing them from everyone's memory and making it is as though the person had never been in them at all.
So, clearly, angels and demons being able to remember, forget, reconstruct and, if you're the Metadork, wipe memories, is very much canon. Apart from that very last one, it does make them quite human-like in a way. We too can forget or (wrongfully and incompletely) reconstruct memories, due to things like trauma, illness or simply a lot of time having passed.
So, just like Crowley remembers going into battle but doesn't remember Furfur being there, or just like Jimbriel has entierly forgotten who he is but still remembers the tune and lyrics to Buddy Holly's song Everyday, and just like archangel Michael was miraculously made to forget Gabriel and yet says "Don't I know you?" when seeing him again – just like that, Aziraphale's memories of the story of Job, the story of wee Morag and the story of the magic show in 1941, might not actually be the whole truth.
So, time to look at where the furniture isn't.
Now, it could very well be that the costume designers of S2 thought: "Fuck it, let's go crazy" – but given that this show has a track record of meticulously making sure to stick to accurate and cohesive character design, doesn't it strike you as odd that Crowley would go from this look at the Flood in Mesopotamia, 3004 BC:
... to the (very iconic, don't get me wrong) Bildad the Shuhuite drip in 2500 BC:
... back to this at the crucifixion of Jesus Christ in 33 AD:
I mean ... I mean– come on, that seems like a bit of a far stretch, even for someone as enthusiastically experimental with fashion as Crowley.
And it's not just that: Where did the sunglasses come from, all of a sudden? And why do they look like some sort of obscure, ancient optometrist's device? It's a known historical fact that the Romans were the ones to have invented sunglasses, somewhere around 50-ish AD. Which actually matches perfectly with when Crowley and Aziraphale meet again in Rome 8 years after the crucifixion (51 AD).
So, where do the weird spectacles come from, over 2000 years too early? Maybe from Aziraphale's brain filling in some gaps? Hasn't Crowley always worn those ridiculous sunglasses? Was it Rome? Or Golgotha? Wessex? Oh, blimey, what does it matter!
And it's not just Crowley: Aziraphale's own clothes, as well as the other angels', seem to be very different from the rather plain linen we see him wear before and after the story of Job.
They're laced with golden embroidery along the neckline and sleeves. The remind almost of the clothes angels are depicted wearing in biblical and historical drawings. Ornate and decadent. Not at all like we see Aziraphale in the other flashbacks of S1.
Even Bildad the Shuhite's hair within the minisode keeps changing, going from all pouffy and voluminous to rather deflated and straight-looking:
The costume department either had to fix up two seperate wigs or manually straighten out the volume of the one again to give it a more sleek look. I'm not a professional in this field, but if there's anything I've learned from watching hours of behind-the-scenes material of movies and shows, it's that very little about costume, character, prop and set design is purely coincidental.
You know what it could be, though? An accurate representation of how memories aren't linear, historically correct and objective representations of a certain event, but rather an ever-changing, jumbled mess of impressions, emotions and exaggerations.
More specifically: Aziraphale's impression, emotions and exaggerations.
Like "remembering" Crowley with sunglasses because he's been wearing them for so long.
Like "remembering" himself wearing more luxurious, angelic clothes because that's how he thinks of the difference between Heaven and Hell.
Like "remembering" the permit as a ridiculously long scroll that folded out over an entire valley.
Like "remembering" Job's children to be weirdly sassy in an almost Aziraphale-esque way (Enon: "Don't be silly!") for the fact that Job would have probably taught them to be more humble and obedient in the presence of a literal angel.
Like "remembering" eating an entire fucking Ox after having just one bite of it while Crowley watched him lustfully, sipping on his wine.
Like "remembering" Crowley calling him 'angel', despite them having barely known each other back then.
There's a reason why the flashbacks in S2 seem so much more alive, quirky and, at many points, confusing and all over the place. Because they're not objective stories being told by a third party. They're Aziraphale's. So much of his own thoughts and feelings at the time get projected onto them because that's simply how memory works!
It's subjective. It's unrealiable.
It's not that I'm calling Aziraphale a liar. He's no more a liar than your parents are, mixing up Sarah and Bobby. Or you, remembering snow instead of sunshine. Memories aren't lies. They can simply be faulty, focus on things that you thought were more important and leaving out or changing things that weren't, to you.
The real challenge in all of this, is trying to filter through Aziraphale's stories to see what it actually is they're telling us. Where it is that the furniture isn't. And I think in this case, that's 6 main things (eff you, God, I know you like sevens, but I don't care):
God and Satan (still) talk to each other We see that Aziraphale is quite surprised when Muriel mentions that the whole Job thing is God's bet with Satan. But clearly, despite having made him and the rest fall, God still converses with Her number one traitor about whether or not the humans simply love Her because she gives them nice things or because they truly believe in Her.
God and Satan (and Heaven and Hell) can and do collaborate with each other when they feel like it So much for choosing sides, huh? Truthfully, this is not the first time this is shown to us, but still. It's another piece of evidence on the growing pile.
Aziraphale understands the World and humans way better than any of the other angels "Well, you see ... Citis is 58 ..."
Aziraphale, despite having troubles voicing it, absolutely disagrees and even condemns God's plan of destroying Job's children (and goats and camels and––)
Aziraphale is willing to lie and thwart the will of God Also not the first time we're being shown this but again, piiiile of evidence.
Angels don't automatically Fall simply by doing the above To me, this is one of the most important take aways. It's already hinted in S1 as well that 'Falling' seems to have been a one time even back when the first war broke out in Heaven. And I actually believe that ever since then, no other angels have Fallen again. Aziraphale is the best example for this. He has gone against God's plan numerous times and even lied to her very face (voice?) about it. And yet, nothing ever happened to him. Why exactly that is the case remains a topic for another meta (that I might or might not be working on already, teehee).
Alright, that concludes this first look at the Job minisode! If there's anything I missed, feel free to share it with me. I'll try and add Part 2 (the story of wee Morag) and Part 3 (the magic show of 1941) soon.
Update: Part 2 and Part 3 have officially been written, you can find it them right here:
Part 2: The Story of wee Morag
Part 3: The Story of the Magic Show in 1941
Hugs and kisses, (God)!
#good omens#good omens season 2#gos2#go2#good omens 2#good omens meta#ineffable husbands#aziraphale#crowley#story of job#job minisode#good omens analysis#aziraphale is a storyteller#but not a very accurate one#my own meta
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