#this one is very personal but incredibly garbled.

[catboysooyoung]

I think the Looky/Lucky Mart arc is becoming one of my fave gsgw arcs yet. It's great for a lot of things:

Kim Soleum, former (alleged) financial sector worker, being utterly baffled by the state of the retail/service worker's workplace environment & conditions (the cramped break room, weird shift rotations, the staff looking barely "human" on their breaks and back to their plastic presentable selves while on shift, the long working hours causing staff to go haywire and malfunction, repeating the same stock greetings/phrases until it was just garbled nonsense, etc. like yes KSE we really do live like this.)

Kim Soleum being so good at "acting" pathetic that even a lost high schooler couldn't really trust him at first (also hilarious that he's really down about this lmao, "Should I have acted a bit more dependable..." This is karma for you pushing all the responsibility on Bronze, man.)

Conversely, Kim Soleum being a bit too competent and so used to his usual Daydream workflow that he ended up thinking several steps ahead of agent Bronze and missing him after they split, having to re-evaluate the situation by readjusting to Bronze's presumed expectations of him (i.e. a pathetic, snot nosed rookie who wouldn't make any rash movements) to find him

Also Kim Soleum... Once again proving himself quite capable even without the help of Braun... That's right baby, you're more than your slightly codependent ex situationship!! You're a strong independent worker!! #GetOverHim

Go Yeongeun revealing more of her personality!! She's someone with similar levelheadedness as Kim Soleum, but she's not as "gentle" as presumed. (Grumbled about being nearly led to her doom by her irresponsible work senior, frustrated by Kim Soleum's lack of awareness and self preservation, dissatisfied with Agent Bronze's apparent lack of gratitude especially considering what she's witnessed her good colleague agent Grapes has gone through, nearly yelling at Director Ho.) My darling bites back!! Barely restrains herself too lmao I love that. She's also very quick witted and incredibly skilled. I'm wondering if she's done her residency as a former student, or has done volunteering work in the red cross... it seems she's quite used to handling emergencies and calling the shots.

Kim Soleum, you're not a coward. I don't think any coward has this little self preservation in them. I won't describe what he did to get their ticket out of there, but know that it's... Quite a lot. But at least we now know he has the grit of a Saw trap survivor! Yet another thing he would excel in! Yay!

Also adore Kim Soleum & Go Yeongeun's comradeship. We all need coworkers who we can sit and sigh with about the workload together and how much we hate our jobs.

Agent Bronze's emotional roller coaster...(being nearly made mince meat, resigning to his fate, then being given hope by his delightful work junior, then finding out said newbie/junior managed to help him by sacrificing something meant for himself...) This man is living in a romcom K-drama with a touch of thriller elements.

Meeting Agent Choi!!!! His exploration record was so. I love him so much.

[astaroth1357]

A Brutally Honest Description of How Each Brother SHOULD Text Each Other

Lucifer

That bitch who corrects your grammar and typos.

"Is it 'who' or 'whom,' MC? You can do better."

Always formal, full sentences, good punctuation, with little typos.

Only changes when he's solo texting Diavolo where suddenly they're sending each other text spam and multiple emojis like gossiping schoolgirls.

Mammon

I swear, his texts should be basically unreadable. Not because he can't write, but because he never reads over for mistakes before hitting send.

Typos, misspellings, missing words, the whole works. Sending messages through only emojis would arguably be more coherent.

Very big fan of voice chat because his brothers make fun of his illegible texts.

Only person who can reliably decipher whatever he says and never gets on his case about it is, surprisely, Lucifer. But he's had to read it for so many years that he barely even notices the flaws anymore. His mind fills in the gaps.

Levi

VERY BIG FAN OF ALL CAPS but to express excitement.

Could write you a novel but will send you an internet link to what he's talking about instead.

Sends random sentence fragments when too excited because his thumbs get away from him and he'll accidently hit "Send" twelve times in a row.

Texts exactly how he speaks. Included his many Levia-isms which are just keyboard smashes or random ass onomatopoeia like "bluforgal"

Satan

ANOTHER BIG FAN OF ALL CAPS because to express ANGER.

Can write you a novel. Will write you a novel. And will squeeze it all into one or two texts max.

Run-on sentences galore. Man has never met a comma he doesn't immediately take in like a starving Victorian orphan.

Likes taking aesthetic pictures of his books, coffee, rain, and cats. Mostly cats. You would think he has to immediately report each one he sees to MC like an endangered species.

Asmo

The living god of emojis. He has ones downloaded that you've never even imagined before. Incredibly hyper-specific ones like "man bent over stop sign puking on ground."

The kind of person who will ALWAYS answer the questions "How are you" or "Where are you" with an immediate selfie. Even in the tub.

Comes up with brilliant hot-takes while drunk and spams them at you at 3 in the morning.

While send selfies and aesthetic pics to you first for approval before posting them to Devilgram. He expects detailed critique on image quality, filter usage, pose, composition, lighting-

Beel

I feel like Beel just matches whatever energy you give him, sometimes for no reason.

If you text him: WHAT IS THE GROCERY LIST THIS WEEK? You'll get back:

EGGS.

CHEESE.

TOMATO.

The only big difference is Belphie because those two can send each other messages that are just "Uh-huh." "No." "No way!" for an hour and come away with a complete conversation.

Belphie

Abbreviation king. If he can skip out on writing out the whole word, he'll do it by any means necessary.

Sometimes he doesn't even bother finishing people's names and uses initials like he speaks in code.

"M wnt 2 🛒 store"

"Wtch out, Lu is 😡"

Falls asleep texting often so messages can be perfectly fine one minute, then turn into a garble of letters the next.

Voice chats his dreams to MC like an audio-diary. Since he naps often, they may get 5 to 10 of these rambily messes sent to them a day.

[bots-and-cons]

Can I request scenerio Arcee with a fem human S/O that was experimented on as a prototype of how Silas would be infused with the corpse of breakdown but the S/O was infused with the corpse of Airachnid. How would Arcee feel knowing that her S/O was now going to spend the rest of her life in the body of her worst enemy to survive?

A/N: This is going to be all angst babyyyyy. I kinda wanna do a part two where Airachnid’s personality starts to affect the reader or something, more angst in any case

Warnings: Body horror?

Arcee hadn’t heard from you for months, and now Airachnid was back. Could the day get any worse? Arcee was feeling frustrated about you seemingly disappearing from the face of the earth, and angry about Airachnid resurfacing. Little did she know those two things were very much connected.

When you came to, you felt incredibly out of it. It was like your brain wasn’t connected to your body at all. You weren’t sure if you were even moving your arm when you tried to bring your hand to touch your face. After a moment of trying, you came to the conclusion it was in fact not moving. It felt like the distance between your brain and the hand you wanted to move was too far to reach.

“What the hell?” you muttered.

The voice that came out didn’t sound like your own. It was a garbled mess and sounded somewhat glitchy, which didn’t make any sense.

“I see you’re awake” an unfamiliar voice said. “Your voice and motor skills will come back to you… hopefully”

While you couldn’t really move, you could still feel that you were restrained. You finally tried to open your eyes, and it was like a TV screen turning on. You couldn’t see clearly right away, but you could tell you were laying on the floor or a table of some sort. There was a lamp above you, slowly swaying back and forth. You turned your head and saw a man standing next to you, he looked like he was oddly small. What the hell was going on?”

“Sir, they’re awake” the man said to someone else in the room, and you heard someone walking towards you.

“Would you look at that, the experiment seems to be a success” he said.

You recognized his voice, it was that M.E.C.H freak Silas.

“What did you do to me?” you asked.

Your voice was still pretty garbled, but better than moments before, so he could make out what you were saying.

“See for yourself” 

The table you were on, started to move into an upright position. You could see a wall of screens in front of you, there were some sorts of schematics displayed on them. Your vision finally focused properly, and you could see what was on the screens.

You felt like you were going to pass out, but something wouldn’t let you. It was like you got to the edge, but something was preventing you from falling into the void. You started to struggle, and some sort of machine started to beep rapidly. You had to get away from them, you had to get back to the autobots, surely they could help you. How long had you been gone? Those sick bastards hadn’t done this in days, it was probably more like weeks, even months.

By some miracle, you managed to get out of the restraints, but you fell down immediately, your legs wouldn’t hold you. Were they even your legs? Or were they hers? You could hear the crackling of those big taser-like devices the M.E.C.H members used.

"You shouldn’t strain yourself, your body is still adjusting" Silas said, standing next to you.

You could barely hold yourself up with your arms, so escape didn’t seem likely. However, staying there wasn’t an option either, who knows what kind of experiments they had planned for you. You probably only had one chance, if you managed to catch these bastards by surprise and your body would cooperate, you might have a chance to get away.

Suddenly there was a commotion outside.

“The autobots are here, we need to retreat!” someone yelled.

Arcee had come for you, you knew she wouldn’t abandon you. Now all you had to do was make sure Silas and his henchmen couldn’t take you with them. You swiped them away with your hand as quickly as you could, while the commotion outside had caught them by surprise.

“I’m in here” you tried to yell.

Your voice didn’t sound like your own at all. You could speak more clearly now, but the autobots wouldn’t be able to tell who you were by your voice. Would they be able to tell at all? You were in Airachnid’s body now. You had somehow been put together like some sort of Frankenstein’s monster. Would Arcee even know it was you? Would she believe you if you told her, or would she just think it was another one of Airachnid’s tricks? Would you even get a chance to explain?

The people who’d done this to you were all leaving through the door behind you, but you were too weak to stop any of them. You were half laying on the ground, barely able to hold your upper body in an upright position.

When Arcee busted into the warehouse, she was ready to put an end to the life of that spidery con. So when she found her nemesis, and the first word out of her mouth was “Cee!” she was understandably confused.

“Don’t call me that” Arcee hissed at the con in front of her.

“I don’t know what they did to me, but I’m not Airachnid. Cee please, it’s me (Name)”

“Shut your mouth decepticon. You don’t get to say their name, and for the last time, stop calling me that” Arcee said as she pointed her blaster straight at your chest.

“Please, I’m begging you. Remember the first time you told me you loved me? We were on top of the base that one chilly night, looking at the stars and I tripped and almost fell off. You grabbed me and stopped me from falling. You saved my life that time. Airachnid wouldn’t know something like that”

Arcee’s blaster started to shudder, and she lowered it slowly. She didn’t understand what was going on. Whoever it was in front of him, they didn’t seem like Airachnid. They didn’t give off the malice and bloodlust that was always present when she was around. It couldn’t be you either, right?

You were almost sure you had convinced her of your identity, and you could leave the strength leaving your body. You collapsed, and the last thing you saw before it all went dark, was Arcee’s confused face.

Arcee decided it would be best to have Ratchet take a look at you at the warehouse rather than bringing you to the base, in case this was some sort of scam. Ratchet scanned you and immediately told everyone else to leave, he needed to talk to Arcee alone. He had an odd look on his face, but mainly it came off as disgust.

“It is Airachnid, isn’t it?” Arcee asked gravely.

“Not exactly” Ratchet said, not looking at Arcee.

“It is Airachnid’s body, yes, but she appears to be dead. (Name) seems to be in control of this… amalgamation”

“Ratchet, could you explain what’s going on? What do you mean by amalgamation?” Arcee asked, starting to sound impatient.

Ratchet was a medic, he had seen all kinds of horrific things, but this might just be the worst. He didn’t really have a choice. He had to open up the chest panels of this thing now in front of him. He had to make sure that whatever the situation was, you would remain alive, if it could be called living. It might have been a mercy to let you drift away.

If cybertronians could throw up, Arcee was sure this was the situation where it would’ve happened. When Ratchet popped open the chest panels, Arcee staggered back a few steps. Almost falling down from the shock. You were in there, a part of you was at least. She felt sick.

“What…?” Arcee whispered.

“I don’t fully understand what’s going on, but it seems they’ve somehow fused (Name)’s consciousness with Airachnid’s body by connecting their brain with-”

“Stop, I don’t want to know!” Arcee exclaimed.

What kind of person could do this? What kind of monster did one have to be to do something like this to another person? Arcee didn’t really care much for the fact that Airachnid was dead, but even she didn’t deserve this. 

“Are they alive?” Arcee asked coldly.

“You could say that. In any case, we must take them back to the base, so I can assess the situation properly”

She couldn’t even bring herself to help carry you through the ground bridge. Arcee couldn’t touch you, she could barely even look at you. How could she move past this? Would she even be able to? Just thinking about touching you while you were like that made a shiver go down her spine. She couldn’t stand the thought of losing you, but was this really a better option? Was it really better to doom you to such a horrible existence? You would be forced to live in a foreign body. You weren’t human anymore, but you weren’t a cybertronian either, you never would be. Like Ratchet said, you were an amalgamation, a nightmarish one at that. Arcee didn’t know what to think. She didn’t know what to do. She just felt sick. No matter how much she loved you, could she live with how you were now? Would death be a mercy for you?

[vibrantstarfire]

little fic about tim's love language being contingency plans

////

The thing is, Tim has a way of attacking Kon’s problems like a puzzle. Like a riddle, waiting to be solved. 

Tim’s plans also don’t involve much feeling, usually, even if the issue is purely an emotional one. While Tim is decent at listening and empathizing, at a certain point he always gets his Robin face on. A signal that, while he’s still certainly listening, there’s a chemical reaction in his brain, completely out of his control, that activates his detective skills. His problem-solving skills. 

It has taken Kon a combined two lifetimes, four years, five collective identities, and two–maybe three?–timelines, but Kon has finally gotten Tim to at least ask before starting to strategize. But lately, Tim has undergone some personal growth, and Kon is starting to wonder if, perhaps, he has learned to not even ask. To instead, politely wait for a signal – a sign, an invitation, even– that said advice is actually wanted. 

Kon would like to take the credit for training him, he really would. But he has a feeling he’s only one of many factors. 

Today, Kon is sitting face-down on Tim’s bed. Krypto sits on top of Kon’s back, the world’s most powerful emotional support dog pinning him in place. Preventing him, more like, from leaving before he's gotten all his complicated, messy, unwanted feelings out. Also preventing him from looking up at his boyfriend before Kon is done feelings-dumping, because otherwise Kon just won't finish talking, and it will go unsaid.

So Kon can’t see it; he can't see the detective face for himself. Can’t verify, for sure, absolutely, 100%, that TIm’s detective face is on. 

But he knows it’s there. 

He’s just spent half an hour talking about his latest identity crisis. Of course Tim’s detective face is on. It’s probably been on since minute two. 

However, Tim is also running his fingers through Kon’s hair, and making the occasional appropriate comment, always generous and rational and kind, always active listening, and– listen, Kon isn’t immune to the soft victim support voice. He’s definitely not immune to the Robin leader voice, but the softer, empathetic, gentle one Tim uses with people who need help? And when it bleeds in so subtly into his regular speaking voice that it’s not immediately obvious that’s where he pulling it from? 

Incredible. Show-stopping. Kon could listen to it all day, if he wasn’t the one monopolizing the conversation by info-dumping all his problems. 

Finally though, he finishes the garbled, soft, self-deprecating speech about how he’ll never be completely free of Lex’s braingook (yes, that is the scientific name for it, thank-you-very-much) and how that means he’s always going to have a chip on his shoulder until Lex dies and even then Kon’s going to have to worry about some secret chip in his brain that transfers Lex’s consciousness to his or what-the-fuck-ever. 

He can hear the comment Tim wants to make. The unspoken, soft little, 'You know, we could probably test you for that... A chip would definitely show up on an MRI...'

Instead, Tim only pauses the briefest, softest moment. “...That must be really stressful for you, worrying about that.” 

Kon looks up, just a little. Sees Tim’s best poker face. 

Then sighs, and bids the victim comfort voice goodbye. “Okay, I give in,” he says, and moves to cross his arms in Tim’s lap instead. Krypto lets out an annoyed little huff at being jostled from Kon's back, but he soon hops off Kon’s back and moves to lay at his side instead. Kon rubs him behind the ears, Krypto butts his head against his hand, and all is well again. “C’mon, out with it.”

“Hm? Out with what?” Tim asks, still in the same plaintive tone. “What do you mean?” 

“Relax, you can stop the sympathy. I know you want to start strategizing how to solve all my problems,” Kon says, and leans up in what he hopes is a very kissable position, because he really wants one. “You’ve suffered enough, I know you’ve already thought through eighteen different plans.” 

Tim lets out a shuddering breath, immediately sagging his shoulders. “Thank you,” he says, sounding exhausted. Distracted, and clearly already thinking of how to phrase his plans, he meets Kon halfway for a kiss. It's even a proper kiss, soft and sweet, and it really does make Kon feel better. Then, to his surprise, Tim also presses a more tender one just between his brows. “I really do empathize, though. Just so you know. This isn’t me not empathizing. But I mean, if you're giving me explicit permission it's not like I haven't been starting to think about how we could test for these and help you stop worrying about them-” 

Kon shakes his head, fond and sweet. “I know. Your love language is solving people’s problems for them, I've accepted this about you."

Tim looks the tiniest bit offended. "I- that's not a love language."

"It is for you," Kon says. Then, he grins, looking up at his boyfriend through his lashes. "So come on. If it's your love language... Show me you love me.” 

Tim’s cheeks bloom red. But he smiles instead of shying away, then runs his fingers through Kon’s hair again, gentle and sweet. “Get comfortable then, because I’ve got a lot of- love to show. To finish the metaphor, I mean. There’s only five so far, but number three is kind of complicated, you're going to want to take notes, but I could summarize it again for you afterwards, when you're less cozy-”

Yeah, Kon thinks. There’s no denying how much Tim loves him. He might be a strategist at heart, but Tim also wouldn’t make immediate contingency plans for just anyone, either. 

Kon curls up on Tim’s lap soon after, with Krypto snuggled up onto his chest. As long as Tim keeps stroking his hair, Kon doesn’t mind the clinical approach to his problems. It’s nice to have a boyfriend who can both meet him where he’s at, and say what he really feels. Even nicer, he thinks, to know that it’s all coming from a place of genuine affection. 

[waitmyturtles]

THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 11 -- 1 OUTTA 3 AIN'T BAD

Preamble! I had a HELL of a day yesterday, woof. So if this comes out garbled, y'all will know why. I'll try to keep this short, but... I'm likely lying to myself, let's see.

TW: FORCEBOOK -- I'm going to say a few words about ForceBook below, so if words about ForceBook are not your thing, please move along!

I'm gonna start this post with thoughts on the three main pairs, and then get some last little thoughts out at the end.

a) I have a feeling that I don't need to write THAT much, because the lovelies @lurkingshan (here), @neuroticbookworm (here), and @chicademartinica (here) all covered the top points of this episode nicely: this episode was a BostonNick WIN. On Nick, dear Chica nailed it so hard that I will have to link AND screenshot her m'fucker:

And Boston, BOSTON, MY MAN! MY MAN! MY MAN!

(Nick says the first line below, with Boston saying the second:)

Fuckin' a. There are two reasons why I STANNED BostonNick in this episode.

1) First of all, as you see above, Nick still had to be a tiny bit of a shit. Nick was in Atom's shoes once. Nick remembers the feeling of having feelings for someone who didn't have feelings back for him. So Nick took a little passive aggressive dig at Boston by calling Boston's sex and predilections "terrible."

And Boston shot back at Atom -- and maybe indirectly at Nick -- with his perspective on sex: "[h]ow can you love me after sleeping together just once?"

I've written before (and forgive the foggy mom brain, but I believe @emotionallychargedtowel has also written on this), that the hormonal experience of sex can impact people in incredibly different ways. Some people, like Boston, feel no connection with the person he's slept with after sex; other people, like Nick and Atom, catch feelings. All of it is normal.

What happened in the dialogues that we were privy to earlier in the series vis à vis Nick and Atom was that WE, the audience, heard THEIR perspectives, and the narratives allowed US to contemplate sympathizing for them -- by playing off of a general assumption that an audience would JUDGE people like Boston for having casual sex. Boston's positions on sex (heh) pissed off people like Nick and Atom! So Boston got fuckin' wiretapped and smeared by these dudes.

However: BOSTON REMAINED CONSISTENT, CONSTANT, AND ACCOUNTABLE to his position, AT ALL TIMES, that he wasn't someone who caught feelings after casual sex. I am sure for many sectors of the Only Friends audience, that this may not have been easy to parse, especially considering the very early and popular judgements levied against Boston. (For the record, I never took Boston as a predator, and I established my thoughts early in the series run on this as rhetoric about Boston's "badness" around sex was flying around. I'm a Khai girlie. Boys, girls, and non-binary friends can be playas, too, and deserve to enjoy their sex lives without judgement.)

What I UTTERLY admire about the pace of this series vis à vis BostonNick is that it took its TIME in establishing Boston's AGENCY to be able to LEVY his position on sex SO STRONGLY and CLEARLY, with Nick's support. While much of the series allowed the popular and condemning rhetoric to swirl around Boston, this scene put a fuckin' NAIL in that coffin. I believe this scene said: you can't only listen to one side, the crying, sobbing side of a person who wants another person after a one-night stand. You HAVE to listen to both sides. The hormonal aspect of wanting to be close to your sex partner is valid, but also -- if the other side is talking, you MUST listen to what the other side is SAYING.

Boston was always clear about his position -- and Nick and Atom HAD to take responsibility for their unreasonable demands from Boston after their one-night stands with him; unreasonable, because Boston CLEARLY stated to the both of them that he wasn't a relationship guy, and would not be forced into it. And both of them ignored those statements, and all hell broke loose, TWICE.

2) HOWEVER! Boston realized, after spending more time with Nick than with any other sex partner, and after he lost his friends, that he HAD caught feelings for his fave, his Nick! Remember last week, when I got all mewdy that MONOGAMY might be the dramatic device that the show would use to "redeem" Boston? BLECH.

DAMN, did this episode SPIN THAT AROUND for me. GOD, I LOOOOOOOOOOVED THAT CONVO WITH NICK AND BOSTON ABOUT FIGURING OUT THEIR STATUS!!!!!

Paraphrasing! "I want to spend the next few months loving on you," or whatever Boston says?! FUCK, YES! Nick, all OVER this, setting boundaries, allowing himself TIME and SPACE to figure out what's best for him, with both Dan and Boston! SHIT, MARK PAKIN SHOWED UP! Omg, BostonNick for the win.

My head's spinning, because that was seriously one of the BEST conversations I've seen written in a drama about the consideration of a relationship and a status check. That impressed me as much as Pharm asking Dean for a break in UWMA -- and then Pharm straight up LIVING HIS LIFE, BBQ pork grills and all, without Dean for a few months.

And. Boston was cool with Nick's boundaries and thoughtfulness. Boston knows what he wants, but he's not gonna push Nick into anything. Boston knows time is ticking, but will wait for Nick's answer.

It was so cool to see. My heart was full.

So that pairing, the NeoMark/BostonNick pairing -- SOLID.

b) Moving on! Thanks to @lurkingshan, I got clarity on what the fuq was happening with Sand and Boeing. At first, I thought Boeing was a little SHIT for showing up to Sand and stirring unnecessary drama in his ex's life after getting rejected by Mew. (Mond, though. 🤤)

But, as Shan pointed out to me in my insane day yesterday: Sand has a problem saying no to dudes. (Homey, RELATE.) So like, then they all go back to Ray's place, and Ray KNOWS that Sand has trouble setting boundaries and saying no, because that's what Sand's mom said to Ray, but also, that's the way Sand's been engaging with Ray himself, and Ray will DEF know what will be up if Sand gets closer to Boeing again, and Ray's like, uh, come into my pool so we can nip this in the bud?, but no, we know what Jojo's thinking, so.

I mean, have sex already, you three, chop chop. I see the FirstKhao gworls on my dash not happy about not having a complete episode of SandRay peace, which I get, but also, this continues to reiterate my bleh on Sand, which like -- get a backbone, Sand. You have a literal boyfriend now, and you're still not saying no to dudes? What if Mild strolled in for a foursome? (NO, DON'T TURN THAT DOWN, SAND, DON'T.) But I'm just saying -- maybe listen to a person in your life, like your mom, to set some boundaries, like your roommate. I'm throwing my hands up in the air on this one, but at least we may get our threesome, and, Mond.

c) Okay, last pair! TopMew. For a hot second, I was impressed with Top.

I liked this, ::waves index finger in a circle::, this worked.

But I have decided. I'm done with ForceBook. I just -- please remember the TW, FB girls. I'll get back to TopMew in a second as characters, but this was my first ForceBook show, and it might be my last. Watching them is as exciting to me as breaking down Amazon boxes.

We have seen Mew waffle this whole dang series. (WELCOME BACK, THE ONLY FRIENDS VENGEFUL WAFFLE! HEART YOU, @starryalpacasstuff!)

And there was more Mew waffling, more talking to moms, and Top is just like, I'm gonna peace out, DEUCES, and then, OF COURSE, HE COMES BACK INTO THE KITCHEN, LIKE HE NEVER LEFT THE HOUSE AFTER SAYING HE WOULD (I cackled), and then they're together in bed. And now they'll move in together.

This was a BIT of a storyline ride. But -- and I HAVE TO ADMIT, part of this is my tiredness talking -- I'm just kinda bored of ForceBook at this point. Do I actually get the sense that Top is *excited* about Mew moving in? Do I get the sense that Top and Mew *love* each other? I.... don't! Is it the chemistry between ForceBook? I.... I think so? I think so!

And, so... Mew will try to convince Ray to accept Top in the next episode? I dunno. (Episode 12 previews, we've learned to distrust them.) As much as I want to try to sit here to analyze TopMew at this point, I kinda just wanna throw my hands up in the air and be like, I'll leave these characters to fiction. And I think it's because I was unfortunately spoiled by the FANTASTIC chemistry emanating out of Neo, Papang, Mark, First, and Mond in this episode (MARK! MONNND. PAPANGGGG.).

I have to admit it, and I'm sorry to admit it. ForceBook do nothing for me, acting-wise and chemistry-wise, and I am done struggling with analyzing TopMew. I'll let 'em be.

d) Last thoughts! Bye, Cheum. We haven't had enough of Nonnie in this series, and I wanna see Nonnie as April dump Cheum's ass and break shit in episode 12, the way Nonnie's real-life brother goes and breaks shit on social media. Way to hold no one, including yourself, truthfully accountable, Cheum.

(What in the. I would love a Soonvijarn episode on Jojo's thoughts on Cheum one day.)

Anyway, bye, B.

THAT'S ALMOST IT! Ephemerality? I hope Boston makes a whole bunch of righteous new homies in NYC. This whole series has made me sick and tired of proximate friends, lol. We'd better see Mond suck face with Khao and First. Andddd, bleep, bloop, that's all I got!

HOME BASE NEXT WEEK, FAM!

[EPHEMERALITY SQUAD, second-to-last weekend meta for ya! @slayerkitty (SK... I am so tired, lol), @ranchthoughts, @chickenstrangers, @twig-tea, @neuroticbookworm, @lurkingshan, @distant-screaming, @clara-maybe-ontheroad, @thatgirl4815]

[quinloki]

Hello(●’◡’●)ﾉ

I wanted to see if you could write for killer Mihawk crocodile and Rob Lucci in your kink series-

on brat taming/soft dom bdsm/ddlg/teasing (orgasm denial) and overstimulation ^^

ig you already did some of them so just skip, and feel free to ignore if you're not ok w it!

I love these kinky stuff you write, you're doing great, have a nice day! Mwahh<3

... I am not 100% sure what you're asking for ^^; But I'm going to do my best to untangle this a bit.

Let's see - Killer, Mihawk, Crocodile, and Robl Lucci - With a limit of three, I'll go with Mihawk, Lucci and hm... Crocodile. We've got a bit of a Mobster vibe going on, so we'll go with the three most likely to wear a suit.

I treat kinks separately, so there's six there, because I'm assuming you're asking for teasing in a specifically orgasm denial sort of way.

Alright! So we'll go with Brat Taming, Overstimulation, and Orgasm Denial. I'll do my best to season it with some of the other things you mentioned, but that'll be our focus for this one. ^_^

Let's go ... Lucci, Mihawk, Crocodile.

Rob Lucci:

Brat Taming - Yes - This would rate a little bit higher if he didn't have the devil fruit that he does have. As a predator/hunter style Zoan, he's not interested in your resistance. You're the prey, his domination over you is a matter of nature - you will submit, and even more than that, you should submit. Being a brat is foolish.

But there is an enjoyment for him in it. The struggle is its own kind of chase, its own kind of hunt, and he can take on a role that is softer that being a beast. On the days where his patience is thin however, your resistance will be short.

Overstimulation - FUCK Yes - The way you lose control of your limbs, the tears and garbled begging. The way your eyes roll into the back of your head and how incredibly still you are with exhaustion afterward. The way your blood pounds under your skin certainly adds to it as well. Sometimes there's no release for you, and sometimes there is - the point is how you twitch and writhe and moan at the overload of tactile inputs. From pleasure to pain, and the breaths in between.

Orgasm Denial - Oh god you don't even know - You better have an A-game for begging with this man. You're going to plead, beg, cry, and bargain before he's had his fill. And if he's doing this to you because you've been a brat? Then you have a lot more to atone for than simply earning release, don't you?

And he'll be so close for it. Listening intently to your broken words, breath against your neck, voice sinking into your ear, teeth so very close to your tear-stained neck. It's hard to say if that was a pleased purr or a frustrated growl, and if it was a growl you've got a long night ahead of you.

Dracule Mihawk:

Brat Taming - FUCK Yes - I've actually touched on Mihawk and daddy dom vibes before, but he really enjoys brat taming. His enjoyment from it is has more to do with how fast he can cause you to cave than anything else. Sometimes he'll let you think you're getting away with things just to give you enough rope to trip yourself up with it. Sometimes he'll have you melting in his hands before you can even get the first snarky word or action completed.

His body against yours, soft but firm voice praising you for being good before you've even gotten a chance to be bad. Words that assure you, you won't be anything but obedient.

Overstimulation - Yes - Mihawk's the kind of person who would strap you down on something (probably spread eagle on the bed, honestly) and fill you up/cover you with vibrators, cover your eyes, and then leave you. The only indication that he was actually nearby would be how the vibrators all settle down just as you're getting close, or the sharp sting of a crop while all the settings are turned up.

If it wasn't for those things, you'd be convinced he was just sitting there with a glass of wine, watching you the entire time.

And... he does that too. But he's far more active in things that it seems to your addled brain.

Orgasm Denial - Sure - if it's a part of his Overstimulation, he'll be more into it. But Orgasm Denial by itself doesn't do much for him. There's control within it, to be sure, but Mihawk prefers to hear you sing in pleasure, not frustration. He might drag things out from time to time when you're being a brat, but he's not going to leave you hanging for too long. It's part of why he doesn't let you act like a brat for very long most of the time.

Now, the flip side of this kink is another matter entirely >.>

Sir Crocodile:

Brat Taming - FUCK Yes - Sir Crocodile prefers to be in control, and preference aside, he is in control. If you want to test that, he'll let you, he'll enjoy every moment of your attempts to do so. Not only is it hot to break your will and then mark you and make you his completely, but there's never a doubt in his mind that he'll put you in your place.

He could, like Mihawk, have you shattered in his hands before you even get started, but Sir Crocodile enjoys watching you try. Because there's always that moment, that first crack or slip, and you look so beautiful torn between wanting to continue being bratty, and wanting to cave in.

Overstimulation - Oh god you don't even know - Crocodile revels in being in control. Taking senses from you, stimulating the ones left, or simply flooding you with sensory inputs. He's very flexible with this kink, and will intently listen to you - before and after a session. Did you like what you thought you would, what else would you like to try? It's not just pushing and pulling pleasure from you, but it's also putting you on edge for so long that

one soft caress and you're a complete mess in his hands.

Orgasm Denial - How Crocodile vibes this is a Sure, but how "good" he is at has much more passion to it. He won't seem to have much of an opinion one way or another, but if you put him in a mood he'll be denying your orgasms for days. Especially if you've irritated him in some way. You cannot beg this man into giving you relief, and if you try to find it on your own you might find yourself immobile or monitored for long stretches of time until he decides you get relief.

(A quietly adorable thing you may notice with time is that if you don't finish neither does he. >.> Take that as you please. )

[definitelynotshouting]

3am Moldy Martyn Anon Back Again

still rotating hunger au despite the MONUMENTAL EVENTS OCCURRING (as soon as i watch secret life instead of just admiring all the fanart i’m gonna be insane too)

1)

thinking abt the tragedy of current watcher grians existence.

so player grian got eaten, remembers being both the devourer and the devoured, etc etc etc, ship of theseus, we’ve covered that

but also? thinking abt the watcher larva that existed before it became grian.

if it could remember anything from that point, it went from

being cocooned in the not-yet-suffocating love of its caretakers, still so unaware of the scope of its world, taking its first steps, learning how to *be*

to, STRAIGHT TO, DO NOT PASS GO DO NOT COLLECT 200$ NO SNACK BREAKS NO NOTHING, DIRECTLY TO,

knowing far too much. knowing that you’re you, the larval watcher cradled by its caretakers, and also you’re you, the player stolen from his home and friends and everything he’s ever loved by these incomprehensible beings and NOW YOURE ONE OF THEM.

it’s incredibly sad— because there’s no one else for watcher grian to BE, other than grian. The larval watcher hadn’t had a chance to exist before it was someone else. Sure, watcher grian’s got the watcher form and watcher hunger and watcher needs— but there was nothing, really, to differentiate the biology from the watcher that watcher grian was before cannibalizing player grians code.

we are, i think, made up of our memories. There wasn’t enough memories in that larval watcher to be an individual at all, in the face of player grians memories. I wonder if the larval watcher had a name, before grian— did any of the watchers care about it, beyond a being a means of continuing a dying species? or was it always meant to be exploited?

think it would be mad interesting to see that angle as well. yes watcher grian and player grian are, functionally, the same person, just with differing amounts of trauma. But how empty did the larval watcher have to be in order for grian, memory wise, to be the same person?

Like, the question was raised and answered earlier, abt the differences between the player and the watcher grian being a ship of theseus question for both the characters and the readers, and like i said before—

who else is there for watcher grian *to be*????

it’s horrifying to think of the implications of the watchers kidnapping and meddling with the very being of a player. it’s even more horrifying to think they’d be so willing to give up one of their very few and delicate larva to this experiment.

even done in desperation, the willingness to sacrifice a child and irrevocably change them in the name of a nebulous idea they (the child/larva) can’t even understand enough to consent to, is both the most horrifying thing that’s come out of the hunger au and also characterizes the watchers extremely well.

2)

surprise! all that was context for a joke (<- says person haunted by the concept).

aware this isn’t canon but please imagine with me the forever toddler watcher consciousness living in the back of grians head:

grian, starving himself to avoid hurting his friends, going through two death games and maintaining enough of a facade to build some incredible structures: finally. sleep.

toddler watcher living in the back of his head: you got games on your phone? you got candy crush? temple run? doodle jump? You got games? Please? Games?

grian, searching up “lobotomy diy wikihow” on minegoogle: you’re lucky i cant punt you.

call that brain a meat hotel the way it’s— *EXTREMELY LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER*

3)

ever think about how tf the watchers came up with this batshit idea in the first place. like i’m imagining a board room in the void with these solar shrimp/centipede lookin mfers in a suit and tie (the pants are either one big pencil skirt or many formal looking leg warmers), and mx. [GARBLED TEXT] (DUBBED JAMIE FOR TRANSLATORS CONVENIENCE) stands up after doing a line of void cocaine (like normal cocaine except it glows purple) directly on the boardroom’s void table and says “I HAVE A SOLUTION TO THE POPULATION CRISIS. ITS GONNA KNOCK YOUR SOCKS OFF. ALL 8 MILLION OF THEM. EVERY ONE OF YOU.”

dramatic pause.

“WE FEED THE BABIES PLAYER BRAINS.”

a timid hand raises.

“YES [GARBLED TEXT] (DUBBED SALAXANDER)?”

“sorry but uh isn’t that what we already do???”

“NO. SALAXANDER THATS THE BEAUTY OF IT. WERE GONNA HAVE THEM EAT THE PLAYER BRAIN…. AND THEN BECOME THEM!!!!!! NO MORE PESKY BABY YEARS. ONLY CAPABLE WATCHER”

“jamie if this is about the larvae throwing up on you the last time you watched them im awful sorry about that—“

“DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TAKES TO GET REGURGITATED EMOTIONS OUT OF IMPORTED CUSTOM MADE GUCCI???? THE HALF DIGESTED REGRET STAINED THE VIBES FOREVER. AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON WHAT THEY DID TO MY JORDANS— DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH 800 PAIRS OF JORDANS COST?? DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO MAKE PLAYER MONEY LOOKING LIKE THIS?”

a deep breath.

“NO MORE BABY WATCHERS! FUCK THEM KIDS. ”

a cheer echos through the room, a near unanimous agreement.

salaxander looks like xier contemplating reducing the dwindling watcher population by one tonight.

DJCJDJVJFJCJDJX no but damn. jokes aside was player eating the first option or did they try other things? it’s not ultimately important, i think, in the scheme of things, but i do think it would be very funny for player eating to be the FIRST resort. like damn y’all saw half an opportunity and jumped on it like vultures on roadkill.

4) re: docs mystery solution i saw someone mention microwaving grian a bit and yknow that one vine where they’re like “GET ON TOP OF THE FRIDGE. GET UP THERE.” and the person climbing the fridge goes “THIS HOUSE IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE.”? yeah. grian microwave hours.

or or or

grian, getting the Watcher Brain Rumbles: do not contact me i will be microwaved.

someone: what

cut to deep fried image of grian in the microwave with impact font caption being

“he will b

be microwaved”

yeah okay memes MOSTLY aside having to go meditate in the ATROCIOUS vibes room for 30 minutes every day/couple of days beats starving. i’m imagining walking past this thing with like telepathy feels like a concert having a collective panic attack.

5) speaking of docs mystery solution, while i know the fic is focused on grians healing, i’m having fun thinking about the random watcher that sees this and goes “WE COULDVE BEEN DOING THAT THE WHOLE TIME????????” well not random there’s like 40 left but i have to imagine at least one of them is odd enough to go “OH BOY CARDBOARD? SIGN ME UP” we all know someone who would subsist off of like the irl version of soylent green exclusively so i imagine watchers aren’t that different. i’m assuming it’s jamie for my own amusement.

don’t have to bother feeding the baby watchers anymore just stick em in the Microwave Incubator while they flop around.

It’s not Delivery, It’s Docm77’s Mystery Meal Solution!

also side note re the mystery solution i feel like that’s the equivalent of being Watcher Vegan. don’t have any follow up to that lmfaooooo.

wow i did. not expect this to get this long. thank you for your time and i hope you have a wonderful day!

ps: you got a 🍄 anon? i think i’ve sent like four or five asks in the past week so perhaps picking an identifier is not A Bad idea djcjdjxjdjdj

HELLO 3AM MUSHROOM ANON!!! :D ajdhsjdjd ur absolutely free to take the mushroom emoji, i dont think anyone has that rn!!

godspeed on watching secret life, i have a post-finale fic up on ao3 now to read whenever u want if u desire an extra dose of pain LOLOL gods that ending gutted me. ive been deboned like a fucking trout about it

BUT YEAH FOR THE HUNGER AU THINGS...

1.) you raise a really good and interesting point, in that like-- yeah!! the larva didnt have time to be anyone other than Grian, because it was specifically modified from the start to copy over his memory code. the entire time it cannibalized his code, it was copying over those memories, his personality, his stats. from the start, the moment it hatched inside of him it was collecting that data and rapidly copying it over.

i dont necessarily think it was super aware while it was doing that-- i think that as time went on the awareness grew, but it was cloudy and uncertain, not something he remembers very clearly or was processed well. he remembers emergence, of course, and he remembers Player!Grian dying (and feeding on him as he did), but those hazy days before that?? not much more than sense memory, i think.

i think on the Watchers' parts it was an extremely calculated move that came from sheer desperation, and it wasnt made lightly-- Watcher culture is very community oriented, and children are incredibly valuable when you can only reproduce like. once or twice every year or so. it was a calculated risk, but in all honesty, it was less risky to them in the long term than just trying to raise a juvenile from scratch. a child doesnt really know their own limitations; an adult, however, is much more knowledgeable, and in theory is more willing to listen to them when they say "hey if you mess around too much you WILL die." Grian was selected because he was clever and tricky-- the Watchers needed a Player with a quick mind so they could cut down on the amount of teaching they'd need to do..... but what they didnt account for, bc Players are so alien to them (and vice versa) is that ummm . well !!!! Thats Trauma, Babe™<3

it genuinely did not occur to the Watchers that Grian wouldnt want to stay. or, at least, they just didnt consider the traumatic aspect of all this, or the MASSIVE cultural shock. Player cultural values are way different in many ways to Watcher cultural values!!! it was a blind spot they truly didnt account for, and ultimately that was why Grian was able to escape; they just didnt see the attempt coming.

UHHHHHH other than that like-- i dont think the larva had a name?? like, the Watchers cared, of course they cared, but this was about as blank of a canvas as you can get to stretch Grian's memories over. and something to note here for you that you might find interesting-- you mentioned here the horror of the Watchers changing the code of a child who cant consent, and thats super true, it is horrifying.... from ours, and a Player's, perspectives. Watchers are subject to a very orange and blue morality system as opposed to ours, which i find a very neat dissonance in-- yes, its absolutely horrifying for us to contemplate being changed so thoroughly against our autonomy. but for Watchers, who forcibly changed themselves to avoid getting wiped out by the Seekers, who regularly shift code around like its water... thats just a tuesday. idk i just think thats a neat concept to noodle on, and that it highlights how alien their culture is vs ours (and Players, whom are closer to us in terms of cultural similarities)

2.) something something funnier as a system--💥💥💥💥💥💥

3.) i am utterly obsessed with this image youve concocted of the Watcher boardroom (which also might be a consequence of having JUST spent over 5 hrs straight playing Control with my cousin LMFAO) and also,,,,, void cocaine,,,,,, 😭😭😭😭😭 the implication that this is just a normal Watcher board meeting is so fucking funny to me I CAAANT

i dont think it was the first idea they had, because i think they tried for very many years to hold out the normal way-- but with how fragile Watchers are, especially their juveniles, it just wasnt a viable option. so they started looking elsewhere; another option i think they explored was to see if they could try and modify themselves again, but... like i said, Watchers are fragile. capable of really cool crazy things!!!! but theyre a "made of spun sugar and held together with a packet of chewing gum" type beat of an entity, yknow?? forcing another hardcore evolutionary change Just Like That was WAY too risky to try again-- i think a lot of Watchers just straight up didnt survive that initial change, bc when you're fucking with structural code, you're about one misstep away from collapsing like a house of cards.

so thats why they ended up settling on Player conversion, so to speak. it was a calculated way to try and mitigate the heavy infant mortality rates they suffer due to juvenile watchers not understanding their limits-- being able to just skip years of around-the-clock minding and monitoring to make sure a juvenile doesnt die would buy a lot of time for the rest of the Watcher colony to start expanding their numbers, which could eventually bring them back up to a larger population. what they didnt account for, unfortunately, is that there is a HUGE culture difference, and a Player forced to go through something that traumatic is unmmm mm. not going to wanna stick around<3

4.) im so obsessed with how everyone has latched onto the microwave thing wkndejfnekfj its so funny to me bc like i know what Doc's machine is, i know exactly how it functions, i even know the exact components its made of-- im honestly just keeping it a secret for the sake of my own amusement at this point WHEEEEEEEZE so seeing yall go ham in the microwave jokes and the machine speculation is SO funny to me. i cant wait for yall to see what it actually is like im so excited to see the reaction SJDBEJDNSNSN /gen

5.) you're so right, Grian is the equivalent of a vegan Watcher 😭😭😭😭😭😭 SKDNSNDNNSNDKSS

begging to the gods that my readmore works here because holy shit this is a long one. but thank u for the ask and the questions and i am indeed having a wonderful day!!! i hope you have a great one too :] ❤️❤️❤️

[boatem-probler]

The Boys Are Back in the Mob in... Tokyo Soul!

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / You Are Here! / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / Wrap-Up

Wowie zowie it's another guest episodes! But this time it's Sam's guest so it's not as good as Lizzie. In these episodes, the boys try to have a nice day out while Professor Geode shows his "family" around town, Grian's mic is out to lunch, and organized crime rears its ugly head once again in the city.

This report contains mentions of: violence, guns, drugs.

Previously on Tokyo Soul:

"Who wants to rub blood on themselves?” -- Lizzie

This Time...

Episode 25 – A NEW FRIEND!

Taurtis is filming a roleplay called “Yandere Middle School” lol.

Sam mentions his “personal friend” named Jin who they need to pick up from the train station.

Taurtis: “You have other friends?” Sam: “Yeah, I have friends!” Grian: “News to me.”

Sam: “Grian had a friend, I can have a friend too.” Taurtis: “But he’s actually likable.”

Sam’s friend is actually moving to the area, Sam says.

Dom and Jerry break the TV.

On the way to the train station, they see that another UFO has crashed into the tree in Geode’s yard.

While the boys are arguing about whether it is, in fact, a UFO, they are HALTed by Officer Flare. He fines them for jaywalking, and then for attempting to bribe him with Doritos and bagels. He doesn’t make any attempt to actually collect any money from them though.

Jerry is selling JerryCats and Air at the train station.

Jin gets off the train, along with two very obviously stereotypical Green Aliens in touristy clothes. Taurtis tries to convince Jin not to move there. Jin is from Kyoto, apparently.

The aliens are met by none other than Geode, who is trying to pass them off as his “Pappa” and “Gramma”.

Dom is running a bar and grill at the train station. Also, it turns out he didn’t break the TV, he stole it to put in his bar and grill.

They look for a restaurant. Grian just straight up walks into someone’s house and sits down at their kitchen table. Jerry breaks the food that was on the table. Then Igbar von Squid walks in because it turns out this is his house. He’s not happy. The boys get out of there pretty fast.

They run into the principal and Grian chews him out again. Jin is a bit shocked to hear what’s been going on at their school.

Jin: “I’m still in Japan, right?”

Honestly, I’m not too sure about that.

Episode 26 – GRIAN IS AN ALIEN!

They go to an actual restaurant. Sam makes Taurtis read the menu sign outside. He claims the restaurant serves “fish legs”, and Jin calls him out on not actually being able to read Japanese. The boys are all shocked that Jin can. More fuel for my silly little “this whole show takes place in some kind of pocket-dimensional space warp” headcanon.

Geode and his “family” are also at the restaurant. Grian, as the only one willing to admit they’re aliens and probably planning some kind of invasion, sits near them so he can listen in on their conversation. He sounds like he’s near tears trying to convince the others.

And then he sounds like a robot, because he’s having mic issues. The way they decide to work this into the story is: Taurtis yells “HE’S AN ALIEN”, Geode yells “THE MIND SLUGS HAVE ACTIVATED”, and everyone runs out of the restaurant, away from Grian.

Grian tearfully chases after them. Taurtis pulls out a gun. Sam tells him to shoot Grian in the leg if he “speaks alien”. Taurtis shoots him before he says anything, he screams, it’s incredibly garbled, everyone runs away in fear again. This is not a good day for Grians.

Then there’s a cut and Grian is speaking normally again. He explains that from his perspective, he was speaking normally and they just shot him for apparently no reason.

Officer Flare fines Grian for having an open wound. Grian decides to bandage his wound with the paper the fine is written on. He also decides to give his name as “Sam Gladiator” when the cop asks.

Sam protests loudly. “Grian, why are you trying to pull a fast one?” Grian says to him. The gaslighter become the gaslighted. Well not really since they all run away before much else is said.

Episode 27 – RUN ITS THE COPS!

They all head over to the apartment Jin’s planning to move into so he can sign the lease. The landlords are… pretty blatantly The Mafia. Also they have a doorman dressed in a very skimpy outfit and a Pepe mask, because that’s the sort of series this is. The landlords ask Jin if he’s “part of another gang in town”.

Jin’s lease contract involves him giving the landlords a pint of blood. And his soul. Right now though, the landlords just make him clean the top floor. Sam et al. go up to watch him clean, Sam gets angry at the younger landlord and punches him, and the younger landlord pulls out a gun. They all start cleaning, except Taurtis, who decides to break all the windows for some reason. Then he falls off the balcony.

The landlords also want Jin to deliver drugs to a man under a bridge. The man is Old Kurokuma, because we can never be rid of this guy. And, of course, the same cop from before walks up and tries to arrest them all. They scatter. The cop shoots at them a couple of times.

They run back to Jin’s apartment. The landlords want the money from the deal, which Jin didn’t get. The cop breaks the door down. The boys break another window to escape. 

They lose the cop by hiding in the school, before presumably heading back to Jin’s apartment. That’s what they say they’re doing, but the episode and the recording session end before they get there.

Grian Trauma Count!

Injuries Sustained:

Shot in the leg and bandaged the wound with a piece of paper and then kept running on it which definitely didn’t help.

Traumatic Events:

Guns are drawn on him multiple times by multiple people.

Once again something weird/bad is happening, in this case possible alien invasion, and literally no one will take his worry seriously.

The aliens do something to him that he doesn’t know what it is, just that it makes his friends convinced he’s an alien, run away from him in fear, and then shoot him.

Forced (by proximity to the guy who’s explicitly being forced, basically) to participate in a drug deal.

Chased and shot at by a police officer.

Next Time... the Deaths Witnessed Count Gets a Pretty Big Shot in the Arm

[albatris]

I'm mixing up names and pronouns so sorry about that but can I please hear more about the vampire who thought they were hungry for someone's baking when they were really thirsty for blood 🥺that excerpt was so neat

:D yay I'm glad you liked it!! thank u for the kind words...!!

that's Nat! poor guy. he recently woke up on the side of the road covered in mud in his rental car with no memory of the past ten days... oh, and he's somehow turning into a vampire now! surprise!

so ya, he has no reason initially to suspect the mystery delicious scent he keeps smelling is human blood.... he doesn't know vampires exist let alone that he is one!! he's just broke n hungry n thinkin about sweet baked goods......

he's an anxious, awkward lad with a big heart and lots of feelings about things. he loves animals! especially cats! and in the story will soon come into possession of a very odd ugly scrungly rescue cat named Grub, who is the light of his life c: he's a vegetarian and an excellent cook, and shows his love for others by cooking their favourite dishes :3 he is incredibly smart and did well back in high school, but as an adult he's rather apathetic and unmotivated, n struggles with his self-esteem quite a bit 😔

Nat works (mostly) night shifts at dodgy petrol station chain Stop 'N' Go, where he takes naps on the clock and encourages shoplifting. he becomes a manager in book two purely by accident, but doesn't stick at it very long

he has schizotypal personality disorder too (like me!), which means he struggles a lot with paranoid ideation and social situations, as well as some mild psychosis. he struggles to make and keep friends, but he really does love people and being included in a friendship group, even if he's pretty nervous. his desperation for friendship often leads to him overextending himself though - kiddo will do almost anything to feel useful and liked :c

Nat's character arc mostly focuses on him learning his place in the world and becoming steadfast in his own values, and LEARNING what those values are n not letting himself get pushed around so much. he's an earnest, kind-hearted dude who wants to do good in the world, and he's trying to balance this with the fact that he now has to feed on human life to survive

he's also trying to solve the mystery of what happened during his ten day disappearance...... aaaand he might end up on a quest to kill and eat the centre of the giant vampire hivemind known as "the Garble" at some point. nbd <3

Nat's vampirism comes with a monster mode! it kicks in when he's extremely stressed or extremely hungry, and has rather too many mouths and eyes and claws. in this state, he is still able to recognise friends, but it takes him a lot more effort and concentration, and he's unable to understand unfamiliar humans or vampires as anything other than food, threats, or resources. it's a painful transformation and Nat really doesn't like going monster mode. it's very scary for him and can be very dangerous for others around him. his partner Quinn and his friends Alex and Zeke can usually calm him down though..... his other friend Yvonne will stay as far away from monster mode Nat as possible, thank you very much

Nat's preferred prey is abusive bosses and dirtbag CEOs and rich pricks, etc etc etc, all of which his own personal rich prick, Quinn, helps him track down and access. he is also not above eating particularly awful customers hahaha. like. if someone is screaming in his face for no reason or it's some creepy dude harassing one of his younger female co-workers, yeah, he might just go for a little spontaneous snack. can you blame him

so yeah! that's a lil about my boy Nat! he's the protagonist and main viewpoint character of "a rental car takes a left down rake street and disappears", the horror trilogy I'm working on atm :D

[robinpixels]

Have you ever thought about how much worse the dynamic between Beta and the Zeniths are, when you do up the timeline and realize she could be as young as fourteen/fifteen? In no way a developed socially adept child because she grew up with freaking holograms and had no positive physical contact?

If you ignore the age bit. Beta probably only knows physical touch through the Specters and maybe some robotics around the ship. The first time she has physical contact that’s nice isn’t even from Aloy. It’s from Varl. And then he gets brutalized and she has no one to hug her or pull her close because Aloy is also socially inept (and possibly 19/20). Zo is trying to deal with the loss of not only the guy she liked but her baby’s dad. The others aren’t even sure how to connect. Though Erend might cause he’s a sibling.

But just. Does anyone else realize how traumatized Beta actually is and how much worse it is for her?

Opinion or your own thoughts? Cause this has me very concerned for how Beta could be mentally for the next game.

oh hello!! haha, god its been so long since i've put my hzd/hfw thinking cap on but i love chattin' shop and opinions and i've a few to toss around

to start around my thoughts personally i've always interpreted beta from the time we know her to be about 18! not from any hard concrete evidence, so this is definitely not a correction, i just gleaned so from initial impressions and from a personal bias in my head how its quite poetic to me if Aloy were staring back at someone that could resemble a version of herself back when she first started her journey. Then lending to her personal frustration when said mirror doesn't in actuality resemble her (or Lis, in her view) at all. its even more devastating to me in this sense too 'cuz what she could have had as a 'childhood' is essentially already all gone. but yeah, long story short - while if i'm honest i don't think she's a child anymore, she is definitely very much so floundering and struggling in her young adulthood (i still stand by how she's depicted in False Negative, like that's just Her to me, Tessa u absolute wonder u).

god, ur probably right about her not having positive physical contact all this time - either violence or nothing up until the point she meets the GAIA squad. the concept of the bond beta and varl could have had always makes me SO sad to think about, it could have been so good, and personally it does frustrate me how they never leaned more into it to the detriment of both varl and beta. they could've had such a beautiful meaningful friendship (please pardon 'Ro is Annoyed at How Varl was Treated as a Character In-Story, Part Infinity, but this does touch upon it). It's undeniable she's been through a whole hell of a lot in that brief span of time she was on Earth and away from the Zeniths - the whole crew has, and as trauma does it's definitely gonna leave them all scrambling.

but in my wholesale opinion i gently pat ur head and assure you she will probably be alright at the end of the day! while FW was imo incredibly garbled in its delivery in places it does make clear that coming together to form a community to withhold against adversity is the goal here, and one everybody at Base recognizes and I feel are making great strides to get there! i have faith in this motley crew - Alva is Alva, bubbly and cooperative as ever; Kotallo's stoic but incredibly warm and well-meaning; Erend is Erend, he's always been good to his friends; Zo as an Utaru probably knows better than anyone the importance of community support and cooperation. as for Aloy i think she's taken that good bopping to the head in regards to learning to depend on people and letting people depend on her - she's got a lot of solitude issues herself as is to be expected but it really did warm me seeing how she's trying to get over them for the sake of everyone around her, and is enjoying finally leaning on that community too. my most precious babygirl. i'm very proud of her

i'm absolutely positive beta is in astoundingly good hands - they're all in astoundingly good hands w one another! it's been so cute to me how post game you can tell she's starting to heal and engage with others, just how the team had done before and after her. While absolutely I think they're all going to have their missteps and stresses and maybe a falling out here or there as they try and adjust, I honestly think the horizon series is at its core all about having compassion and care for your fellow man (albeit taking no shit from them at the same time) and the world you live in, so I doubt any of them will even accidentally leave Beta behind. she's got a sister, a mom, and a wholeass family now!! i adore how all the post-game content has been beta shyly but slowly but surely getting better, determined as she is to contribute the ways she can now.

hahaskdaflj; you were probably expecting an angstier response out of me and oh believe me i love the angst!! but i also have such a soft spot for when horizon goes all Indomitable Human Spirit on us it makes me go all gooey. i think the kids will be alright <3

on a funnier note to an extent i believe in beta precisely BECAUSE she's already a little unhinged. girl came in with the box already banged up and inherently fucked up. yeah miss beta 'let me just knock myself out cold and tear this implant directly out of my head that'll thwart em' sobeck will fit right alongside that hall of madness now known as Base GAIA she'll do just fine and dandy. i've gotten such a taste for unhinged sapphics lately and when horizon delivers it DELIVERS

[siredisco]

freemind... He starts the series as a very abrasive but harmless guy. Only experience with guns being watching Top Gun repeatedly. People don't react to his threats, so he makes them often and they don't mean a thing. He's late to work very often. People act like he isn't very good at his job. He goofs off at work.

This character stays pretty consistent for the majority of the first half of the series. Until the chapter Apprehension ends, he takes a while to stop thinking about the fact that he's killing people and that this is the first time he's ever interacted with guns. He's hungry all the time. He considers curling up in a vent and waiting to die and only doesn't because being hungry would be worse.

Then the ambush happens and he goes through the following chapters not really remembering what happened to him, fully willing to kill anyone and everyone he meets the moment he realizes that's adjacent to what he was doing before the ambush, and he's unbothered by the idea of mass murder. Violence ceases to phase him at all.

He is also an incredibly silly person throughout and. Probably has echolalia. He makes goofy noises, meows, beeps (especially when something has just beeped at him), jumps for joy on two occasions, garbles words horribly, likes repeating words until they blend together and barely sound like the originals, that sort of thing. Interestingly, that takes place primarily before the ambush. He's still silly afterwards, but. Different.

He is also horribly /tired./ I can see, as the series goes on, him slipping up and making more stupid mistakes just because he isn't able to think straight. He almost walks into a tripmine because he hasn't slept in two-three days. The last time he was awake for four days in a row, he thought frog people were invading his house.

There's a lot to love about him. I think about him a lot these days.

I have personal ideas that line up with what you said about the echolalia and noises. One of the parts I'm focusing on is the Apprehension/post-Apprehension change, because it's so interesting, especially in ways of coping mechanisms. I have some of my own little theories I'm going to write about (such as- I think he's physically fit but also may have a physically disability/some type of chronic pain. Purely because of his eye loss and drug use history. It's in my brain all the time as a human with chronic pain, but cannon is sorta different, so we'll see if it comes up).

He's my choice because of how interesting and complex he is as a person. His family relationships, his reactions (lack-there-of), the pirate episode (so important), and speech patterns/ how he talks to/ about others. It's all so. . . In my mind. All day. Your notes specifically get him more in brain, because they're so good and helpful because I don't have to time to watch every episode again for this (but I'm watching it congruently).

This is such a good view overall. The hunger part is something I brought up in a short answer I wrote for this same class a week~ish ago. I get to go crazy and this just provides me more food-for-thought. Yaay thank you.

[tanetime]

I wanted to make bios for Wyneer's masks WEEKS ago to formally introduce them but I've had no time. So, here's the ref sheets I've been using for Art Fight for all of the masks who have portrait art so far.

I hope this helps people who hadn't been introduced them yet understand them a bit better! (And if it doesn't - ask me about them!)

Don't think about Wyneer's masks as alternate personalities. Think of them more as his OCs that he spontaneously manifested into existence via his masks.

I'll talk about each one a little more under the cut.

Fright is the first mask Wyneer made, and acts appropriately scuffed. Constantly throttled by adrenaline, he spends his time having non-stop panic attacks and sobbing his way through awkward social interactions. He chills out when Enlightened... but not by very much. He often wonders if Wyneer made him poorly as a joke.

Lay is just a normal hardworking guy from the South, which begs the question of how he got here, or why he can't remember his name or where he comes from, or what happened to him that he's like this. His stoic and workaholic nature belies an anxious mind that is desperately trying to remember itself... or wonder if there's truly anything to remember at all.

Brave is a tactician who hails from a distant time. Though he looks fierce, he is affable towards fellow Survivors and is very easy to impress. While he is intelligent, there are some things that elude his archiac understanding of the world. He rarely talks, but his speech tends to be poetic when he does. The markings Wyneer drew on his mask bear little significance to him personally.

Boutey was designed to be a leader, and accomplishes it via manipulation. Though he puts on a front of ditzy, cutesy helplessness, he is extremely intelligent and narcissistic. He believes all people are as 'fake' as he is and rarely trusts others. If he becomes fond of an intensely trusting person, he can sometimes become protective of them, fearing others will take advantage of them.

Crimson is loud, dim-witted, obnoxious, and incredibly vain... but loves with his whole heart and is unfailingly supportive to his friends. He is good to vent to if you need metaphorical advice that doesn't make a whole lot of sense. His pyrokinetic powers are tied to his emotions, so Wyneer made him mostly unable to feel anger; something that privately leaves Crimson weirded out.

Azure routinely sets himself on fire to keep others warm. He worries extensively about the wellbeing of those around him, and despises people who are bullies. He tends to bottle up his emotions and lash out when pushed to his limit. He speaks with a Minnesotan accent, but does not remember where he comes from. He considers the other gem masks to be his family and is often apologising for their behaviour.

Blake is lost in his own little world. The arrangement of gems on his mask has caused him to become attuned to an incomprensible garble of otherworldly noise that he claims is the voice of his gods. He is rarely emotive (when not jubilliant), fears nothing, has no grasp of personal space, and often speaks in complete nonsense with the impassioned maner of a preacher. He cares for no one but Wyneer - whom he refers to as his 'host.' He has an uncomfortably clingy fascination with people who work with shadow or lunar magic. Whoever Blake was when Wyneer first made him has been gone for a very long time.

Saffron's mask was created by Blake during an attempt at refining Wyneer's designs. Saffron's magical abilities are more refined, but his body suffers heavily as a result. He is constantly charged with magic from his gems and is extremely irritable and restless if not worn out. He cares strongly about his self-image and will not allow himself to fail, and is similarly critical of others. He is kind towards younger or more anxious Survivors however, and has a playful side - especially when 'playfully' antagonising his friends... He and Blake do not get along. Not that Blake cares about him to begin with.

[rea-grimm]

Otaku guardian of gate - Chapter 4

However, all good things must come to an end. You were just examining a pillar underwater when Levi swam up to you and indicated that he needed to talk to you. So you swam above the surface and sat on the edge of the ship.

“You need to leave as soon as possible,” he said as he sat down next to you.

"What? Why?" you didn't understand him and you looked at him like you just saw a ghost.

"Lucifer is supposed to come check. He's kind of like the main boss in the game. I don't know what he'd do if he found a human here... I don't want him to hurt you..." he garbled the last part so quickly that he couldn't be understood.

"Do I really have to leave? I don't want to leave you here alone," you said, not liking the very thought of leaving. You knew it would come, but you expected it to come with the completion of your work.

"He's too dangerous for that," he refused to be persuaded.

"What if I hide on an island?" you suggested since you didn't want to leave. Levi thought about it for a moment, but he'd still rather you left.

In the end, he agreed that you would hide on the island. There was a hidden cave, which Levi also enchanted so that no one would know that a human was hiding there.

The closer the day of his brother's visit got closer, the more nervous Levi became. He moved you to the cave a week earlier than planned and so that you wouldn't needlessly take things from the ship there, he took his bathtub and things there for you to be comfortable.

During that time, he even banned you from diving and leaving the cave in general. Slowly but surely you were getting nervous too. What kind of demon could it be that Levi was so afraid of?

Finally, the day of the visitation arrived and on that day you were completely forbidden to leave the cave until he told you to. Levi had been nervous since the morning itself and was pacing from place to place. You tried to calm him down, but when you didn't know what you were up against, it was difficult.

Before the demon left, you hugged him so he knew you were there for him. Even though you had already hugged him several times, the demon still blushed and looked like he couldn't count to five. He mumbled something before leaving you.

Although you promised him that you would stay in the cave, you did not enjoy sitting in one place. Especially when you've been there for almost a week. Instead, you took your flashlight and headed deeper into the cave.

The space around you began to narrow and the ceiling was also falling. As you walked on, you began to feel like you were hearing voices. That got you interested. You had to crouch more and more until you finally reached a small hole in the floor where you could hear two voices perfectly. One belonged to Levi, but you didn't recognize the other. It must have belonged to his brother.

"I must say you did your job better than I expected," a voice praised him. You laid on your stomach and leaned over the crack to see what was going on.

You only saw an unknown person from your place. Levi must have been somewhere out of your line of sight. 

His brother wore a black and red uniform, had short raven hair, and looked satisfied. From the looks of it, you didn't think he was that bad, but you learned a long time ago not to judge a book by its cover.

"I'd say it's about time you came home," the demon smiled.

"I'd rather stay. I don't think I've been punished enough," you heard Levi say. His brother raised one eyebrow.

"Oh, really? What's behind such a sudden change of attitude?" he asked him and you got the impression he was trying to find a reason why his little brother wanted to stay here.

"I just don't think I've learned enough…" Levi began when suddenly there was a cracking sound in the ceiling. 

As you lay there the crack began to widen and before you could disappear you were already falling down the opening. You were incredibly grateful when Levi caught you.

"What are you doing here?" the sea serpent hissed at you and helped you to your feet. His face showed concern. This was bad.

“Don't tell me you want to stay here for a lowly human?!” the black-haired demon raged.

“Y/N is no ordinary person,” Levi defended you, stepping in front of you. You both could feel the rage burning from the older demon.

"You're coming back with me, where you belong!" roared the demon.

"I'll stay here!" Levi stood his ground, though he didn't sound very convincing compared to his brother.

“I don't care how, but you're coming home with me,” he growled and you feared what he was capable of doing for that.

Rage radiated from the demon and you saw two pairs of raven wings grow from his back and a pair of black twisted horns from his hair. This was a bad sign. You pressed closer to Levi.

"Leviathan!" thundered Lucifer. Levi didn't answer that and before you knew it, he took you in his arms and jumped into the water with you. You barely had time to inhale and hold your breath. 

In the water, the sea serpent had a considerable advantage over his brother, and he knew it like the end of his tail. In addition, to be faster, he also changed into his demon form.

You were slowly running out of breath and you had no idea where you were swimming. Just when you thought you couldn't take it any longer, you emerged in some kind of air pocket. You gasped for air before you finally exhaled.

"He won't let me go," Levi said in a low voice, looking genuinely sorry. You wanted to object to that, but he stopped you.

“If he catches you, I don't even want to imagine what he would do to you,” he sounded so urgent that you stopped objecting.

Together you then planned the best way to get you to safety. It was pretty simple, but now it was all about luck. Levi was to act as a decoy and you were to get to the ship and leave in the meantime. Levi will still help you get closer to the ship, but the rest will be up to you.

"Will I see you ever again?" you asked him.

"I don't know," he replied. You understood him. You pulled him in and kissed him before starting your escape plan.

“Good luck,” you wished him.

"To you too," he replied even though he was still red before disappearing under the surface. You waited as you agreed before sinking too and headed for your ship.

You managed to get out of there safely, started the engine and headed home. Before the islands disappeared from view, you looked back one last time. You already missed it here.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Obey me! Masterlist

[hello-there-world]

boy...thought about Into The Pit and how it would work in the Rewrite.

listen, if the Rewrite had it's own version of the Fazbear Frights books, they would be Incredibly different. mostly because i'd make them more Easily Connectable To The Games. the only times that the lore would be hard to immediately connect to the games would be in situations where A) it's telling the story of a side character who had a somewhat notable role in the story, but aren't really in the spotlight (ex. the MCI's parents/siblings and Brittany, one of the kids who locked Charlie outside), B) It's A Metaphor For Something In The Plot, or C) It's Basically A Parable/Fairytale Version Of An Event In The Plot. for the latter two, it's up to the reader to figure out which event/plot point is being alluded to.

along with this, the stories are sorta put into categories, which include, but are not limited to:

"William, You're Dead, Stop Traumatizing People/Kids/Your Family (set in stories from the Springtrap Era onwards)

"Local Kid Learns About The Child Murders, Usually Through Supernatural Means"

"Parable/Metaphor About Something That Happened"

"Local Kid Interacts With A Ghost (or multiple) And Doesn't Notice Until Years Later"

"Let's See How Those Side Characters Are Doing! *camera pans to a person/people who very likely need therapy*"

"Plot Thing That's Vaguely Mentioned/Alluded To In The Games That Is Being Expanded On In This Story"

and many more!

as well as hybrids of the above

"Into The Pit" would be a hybrid of points 1 & 2. William causes problems from the afterlife and Oswald learns about some Child Murder!

so...here's how the story/game would go in the Rewrite:

pretty much everything up until Oswald gets into the Ball Pit is the same. but once he gets inside the Ball Pit, instead of getting Literally transported into the past...he starts hearing things.* from the sounds of it...it's a girl, talking to what sounds like a cheerful older man. for a few seconds, everything is garbled, and Oswald can't make out much. but then...things clear up a bit more. the girl talks, annoyed, about how her parents keep promising to get her a dog, but never keep their promise...but then the man tells her that he's got a puppy she can have. if she follows him. after that point, things get garbled again, but Oswald manages to make out the girl's name: Naomi.

for a few seconds, everything is quiet.

and then Oswald hears screaming.

(* so. while the Ball Pit isn't an actual "time machine," it does have an interesting function! so, while i leave most explanations for why things function the way that they do in the Rewrite as simply Paranormal Bullshit, there are a few things with more "complicated" explanations. sometimes, if a place is Haunted Enough, then there are two things that may happen, sometimes at the same time: 1) anything that is humanoid-ish, and NOT already possessed by a spirit or something similar, will become sentient (this is what happened with Blackjack; they're not haunted, but there were enough ghosts in Fredbear's for that Ghost Energy to grant them sentience), and or 2) an area will become a "Window To The Past," generally for a time in the spirit's past, or when a death occurred. the latter is what happened to the Ball Pit. Jeff's Pizza used to be the Original 1980-85 Freddy's, the one the original murders took place in. however, there's one teensy lil detail to remember about "Windows To The Past"; they only show you what a spirit wants to show you. they don't just function independently like Sentient Things do. so stick a pin in that detail: a ghost is choosing to show Oswald the murders)

after this, Oswald's dad pulls him out of the Ball Pit, and is about to start scolding him before he notices that Oz looks incredibly freaked out. upon asking him what's wrong, Oz manages to stammer out that he swears he heard voices and screaming in the Ball Pit. his dad thinks Oz is joking around, or that his mind had been playing tricks on him. despite Oz insisting that he heard something, his dad brushes him off and decides to just take him home.

so...Oz's dad doesn't get replaced by a Demon Hare. a pretty big change, right? but...i've decided to replace it with something that not only makes more sense in the context of the Rewrite, but is equally as terrifying in my opinion!

that night, Oswald has a nightmare. his dad is replaced by this...weird, glitching yellow hare. it doesn't speak, but otherwise, it acts just like his dad. and regardless of Oz's constant statements about that thing not being his father, no one seems to believe him.

the week continues on like this: his father (who now...oddly seems on edge) drops him off at Jeff's Pizza, and Oz, in his curiosity, keeps returning to the Ball Pit, believing that some being is trying to tell him something. each time he returns, he hears the sound of a child being lured off and then their screams. what's more disturbing, each time he returns to the Ball Pit, the...echoes, if you will, get more graphic, more detailed. and boy, does he not like it. but in his mind, it must be some message from beyond the grave, some spirit trying to get his attention. but why? his nightmares get worse; sometimes it's him dealing with this thing replacing his father, and him trying to avoid it like the plague. other times, it's him finding himself in an abandoned pizzeria, trying to hide from it. along with this, it seems to be leaking into his normal life, too. photos on his computer of him and his dad being edited (enough so to where Oz made a protected file to put them in), strange text files appearing, strange drawings, electronics randomly glitching and voices coming from the static, you get the gist.

the only person who seems to understand what he's going through is a kid that he was...relatively close to, named Cameron (and here's a fun fact: Cam's a main character in the Modern Era! i'll let you figure out how :]). the two never talked much during school, but...they'd consider each other somewhat close. they worked on some assignments together and generally got along. Cam also speaks of having to deal with a glitching yellow hare in his dreams, among...other things. maybe not having it replace his father, but it was still some creepy and scary stuff. Cam isn't able to offer much help on how to get rid of it, but offers some advice, based off of what he did himself: 1) always stay one step ahead of it. heck, stay three steps ahead. keep it on its toes like it keeps you on yours. if you're in a dream that you're familiar with, do something to knock it off its rhythm and get some control, and then keep yourself ahead of it. 2) don't let it get into your head, keep yourself calm, and think as logically as you can. it's a dream, after all. as far as Cameron can tell, it can hurt you in your dreams, and nothing carries over to the real world ("Well...not yet," Cam says. "Hopefully it won't...but try not to get hurt regardless.").

but then something unexpected happens about two weeks into this. Oz's dad finally confesses something to him; he's been having weird nightmares for the past two weeks, sometimes of him having no control over his own body as something forces him to hunt down and scare his own son, sometimes he's stuck in a dark room inside of a pizzeria he used to frequent when he was a little kid, all while he can hear Oz running and fighting for his life.

and uh. they realize they've been having the same nightmares. Well.

not sure on exactly how it ends, but it'll have a happy one: Malhare/William gets "exorcised" from the family (somehow) and things go back to normal. father/son bonding, you get the idea :] things get better!!

but yeah, to summarize:

Malhare, Can You Stop Terrorizing Oz, Please?

and, of course:

Oswald 🤝 Cameron: Glitchy Hare Is Tormenting Me And My Loved Ones (especially me in my nightmares)

Oh, this is fun. Please stop tormenting the middle schoolers, Malhare.

[quietroadkill]

sherlock's unnecessary life tips for people who don't do this sort of thing because why would anyone behave like this hirself

1. do not call that handsome man "butch lesbian core" because he might be offended by it. he's pretty and the leather/patterned top/boots or loafers combos in a Casually Dapper way are incredibly stunning in a very Butch flavour, but

2. your compliments are awful. what sounds like a compliment to you is a garbled mess of nonsense and/or an insult to other people.

3. joking about someone being autistic like you is also seen as an insult. it is not seen as a compliment. or an In Group Joke that signifies comfort between parties. it is seen as an insult.

4. your compliments are garbage and you shouldn't try OR you should only return a compliment once it is given.

5. there's something wrong with you and they can all smell it like blood in the water.

6. complimenting people's appearances is flirtatious

7. looking at people is also flirtatious but only sometimes (working this one out myself)

8. other girls don't like you. you're either a sham girl or One Of The Boys but not A Boy and so they hate you for it either way you lean

9. complimenting other people's fashion is considered flirtatious, as it is complimenting another person's appearance (as opposed to their obvious fashion choices) and is not a good conversation opener for subcultures & their fashion significance.

10. do not clap for people when they sing in public. that's disturbing. that alarms them. even if you meant it as a compliment, or a Thank You For The Joy! sort of signifier. you're just odd. stop.

11. when you return a compliment after being complimented, it seems disingenuous

12. when you compliment people sporadically, it also seems disingenuous

13. you're either too small/too quiet or you take up too much room / are too loud.

14. you don't know how to dress, look, move, talk, blink, breathe, stand, walk or smile in a way that makes you fade into the background normally. you're so abnormal that you're spotted instantly.

15. you should not hug people.

16. hugs are reserved for people you are close to.

17. you are the kind of person people cannot be close to.

18. "can I buy you a drink" sometimes means "I can see your glass is empty", sometimes it means "I am flirting with you" and sometimes it means "buy yourself a drink, my offer was to see if you'd take me up on it, which is rude to do btw" and it's indescribable which meaning these have until it's far too late.

19. people can only stand you mildly if they are drunk and/or high.

20. and even then it's pushing it.

21. everyone shops everything all the time. and they only ever buy pretty products. and you are an ugly product, and thus everyone shopping will always retract in disgust, because ugly doesn't sell.

22. neither does broken.

23. other girls convene in the bathroom discussing how you don't belong there. you don't belong in the men's room either, and they don't suggest that you do, just that you don't belong here, which is to say that you don't belong.

24. you relate to everyone as best as you can. it makes you unrelatable.

25. every good moment you've ever had was a total fluke, and you will only ever get those scraps, and you were never even meant to have them to begin with so you'd best be grateful

[zannolin]

what i want my writing to feel like (except it only makes sense to me).

“monet refuses the operation” lisel mueller / expansion, paige bradley x “the old astronomer to his pupil”, sarah williams / griffin mcelroy / @phantomrose96 & @shirecorn / “magic” shel silverstein / the man from snowy river, 1982 / “we are beautiful, we are doomed” los campesinos / “to the bone” dorothy allison / “ghost stories” the narcissist cookbook / @lovelustquotes / “monk” ghost quartet / the haunting of hill house, 2018 / “apple” the narcissist cookbook / @seaoflove / “the year in taxidermy” kristen arnett