#this one is a lot shorter than my other rambles lol

[hereforthe911buds]

the best and most excruciating ending for season 7 would be going full circle with Eddie unconscious in the hospital due to a very close call, with all the trauma of nearly losing Eddie in the season 4 shooting resurfacing for Buck. maybe there would be a scene where Buck isn't allowed to go visit Eddie while in ICU since he isn't legally family, really nailing into him that's what he wants to be for Eddie, even more than already being tied to Christopher. because Eddie is his person.

once out of the worst of it, Buck is alone with Eddie in a hospital room, Eddie still not conscious but improving. Buck is sitting by the bed holding his hand, while no longer on the edge of death, Buck is still really upset.

finally Buck releases, "I can't keep doing this. not just seeing you like this but not being able to be there every step of the way, because-"

he chokes on his word and pauses.

"there is something I want to tell to you. something that I've probably wanted to say for a while now, and I promise to tell you again when you wake up. but I need to say it once while I know you're breathing because I'll hate myself forever if I don't."

Buck stands up and leans over Eddie. he goes in close, lips hovering over Eddie's forehead, "I'm in love with you Edmundo Diaz" in the softest, most vulnerable volume possible before pressing a soft kiss on his temple, "and even if you don't love me back in the same way, I needed to say it."

there's no response. Buck knew there wouldn't be but he wanted one so bad, somewhat hoping for a fairytale moment. he pulls away but keeps talking to like they were having a conversation, "I need to go to the cafeteria for a drink, I'll be right back."

as his hand is slipping away, suddenly there is a squeeze back.

Buck nearly jumps out of his skin, on top of wondering if Eddie heard him just now. he is still too exhausted to open his eyes, but then Eddie sighs, "I love you too Evan Buckley". Buck is pale, looking terrified, and then the lightest smile.

and then BAM the scene cuts and the credits begin.

imagine the chaos of confirmation at the very last moment. the fan reaction. the interviews. everything, but also that being all we get story wise for some period of time. would be the best and worst thing to ever happen to me. I doubt it will go that way but it would really signify "we are picking up where the story should have gone in season 4" which i think would be beautiful.

[herbertwest]

If my outline is accurate (which it may not be - I wouldn't be shocked if I needed to insert some chapters near the end) I have 16 chapters to go. If they average out at 5 pages (pretty standard for a chapter in an early draft for me) that's 80 pages, which would bring the total up to 275 pages when complete. While I'd prefer 300+ pages and 80k+ words, that's totally respectable.

Not sure what the word count would be for that.

[starshipdecay]

Toon Zelda redesigns! I've never been fond of the Toon Zelda design, and these girls deserve some individuality. Design notes and rambles below the cut :D

(time to turn the proper grammar off i aint capitalizing all this. warning: i am verbose)

first up, tmc zelda!

shes the one most like toon zelda, since i felt like the vibes fit the *most* (though not a lot). also, with her place on the timeline, i could justify a lot of bits, like the wings and the cape

the cape! obvs it comes from the toon zelda base design, but also it involves skyloftian fashion! i take the timeline as a challenge, and i once saw a take somewhere that the skyloftians all wear their family crests (most often birds lol) on their person. zelda here (and link too) do just that, wearing their family crests on little caplets. on the back is, of course the royal crest

i went very cutesy princess for her. tmc has such a *whimsical* vibe that i feel is very. muted? by the fact its stuck with the toon style. so i wanted to put in that vibe here. also her sprites make it look like her skirt is super poofy, so how could i not?

curly hair: i wanted something interesting, and most zeldas have straight hair. so! adds to the cuteness

i didnt draw it so well but she (and link) both have very sleepy expressions. zelda especially just has a sleepy expression in her sprite, its quite adorable.

shes not as decked out as other princesses, cuz i see tmc taking place before the royal family really starts to get *royal* as we see it. shes still of course got a tiara and some embroidery tho.

Tetra! her base design isnt all that changed from the original. her name is a fun hc of mine tho. i think "von Hyrule" sounds better as a surname than just "hyrule". shes not zelda, but shes still a descendant.

(WW) princess z (as i call her)

I went more oot zelda vibes for her, since she would be closer, temporally, to oot. i also went very warm, since ive never seen the flood as a *warm* endeavor.

shes got the shoulder danglies, as most zeldas have shoulder armor of some kind. the danglies instead of actual armor are supposed to kind of evoke a royal sea captain kind of vibe.

shes ghostly, with a fish-eyed stare. shes been dead and gone for a long time. shes also a bit taller and a few years older than tetra (as of ww). shes just some spectre the king saw in tetra, not at all a close match

tetra, being smaller than princess z, doesnt fit into the clothes. the dress is too big for her (as is in canon gd that skirt is WAY too long for her), the coat is baggy. the role of a princess *literally* does not fit her.

the ribbons! theyre my replacement for the wings, and they represent the wind in the game! since its represented by white lines, the ribbons are a perfect symbolic match. (also, a note, tetras hair is shorter and coarser than princess z's)

i mostly bullshitted the blue panel but the vague idea i gave it was 'a hope for the triforce to give good fortunes to the people' (pictured as dots, mostly behind her arms)

Pirate Queen Tetra

ph! about a year has passed, and tetra has really grown into her own! as well as literally grown!

shes still tetra, pirate and captain, but shes incorporated that royal heritage into her identity: quite literally! she made piecemeal of the original outfit (what was left of it anyway after the fight), and added bits and pieces to her new life.

she also takes full advantage of said heritage to call herself pirate queen. its great for branding. whos gonna say she CANT go by pirate queen?

the seagull feather is from Aryll. only crew member tetra wears a trinket from (who can say no to that ball of sunshine! certainly not tetra)

not many notes. yall can see whats there. (also she still wears her hair in a bun, its just in a low bun (you can almost see it) when she wears her hat)

st zelda!

first note is: shes not a princess! shes an heiress of the company tetra had made and left behind. hence her title of Lady zelda. ("new hyrule" rly just like-- the ending of ww was *literally* that hyrule is dead and thats okay. how did they miss that :sob emoji:) also calling her Lady Zelda fits with the train vibes

shes in a 1880s style bustle dress because 1) i am OBSESSED with bustle dresses. i love them. so much. 2) the more historical vibe works really well with trains! also a lot of the other outfits in the game have late victorian vibes, so shes certainly not out of place.

her hat (and gloves): any proper lady has a hat on when going about town, however, when she gets body snatched, she pulled out her hatpin to use (ineffectively) as a weapon (she IS tetras great-great-granddaughter), causing her to lose her hat *and* hairdo.

shes still got the hatpin in her ghost form, too. she uses it to threaten people for funsies

Ribbons! on the topic of hairdo, her ribbons! visually tying her to tetras design, the ribbons here instead take on the image of train tracks, with her pin (on the left side) evoking a train engine. the pin also makes her look rich and girly. when her hair comes undone, this makes the ribbons all loose, like how the train tracks disappear in game. (the hat also kinda connects her to tetra)

thanks for reading :D i hope you liked reading this as much as i liked typing it

[the-moon-files]

YESSSSS I BEG GET INTO THE CULTURAL DIDFERENCES BETWEEN HYLIANS AND HUMANS 🙏🙏

...now ur just sweet talking me 🥰 /lh

Not years, well maybe 1 year-

but i have wanted to ramble desperately to smone, even the tumblr void if i had to, abt humans vs. hylians so much, esp with a guide reader or male reader bc whatdya know im into niche stuff that only u and like 2 other ppl like lmao ¯\(ツ)/¯

Anyway im so shocked, since ur like the third person to be interested in this and wanna hear abt it 🥺 🤲💌 here u go!! Hope u like it <333 👉👈

Sun: Masc!Reader (he/him)

Orbit: Humans are Not Hylians/Humans are Space Orcs AU, Headcanons-ish, long overall but each section is kinda short

Stars: Mostly worldbuilding! you've been warned, don't get mad me for not talking abt the boys too much✌️

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: mild cursing, mentions of private area/joke in the clothing headcanons, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

☆

just some quick headcanons bc tbh i haven't given it too much thought, and i feel like I've been able to somewhat get into it in other posts? or maybe im thinking of stuff i have in my drafts idk-

Imma make another list, so buckle up for the short ride lol

Courting periods/dating/marriage

individual/small groups society-based hylians v. large personal groups/large community society-based humans

simpler foods hylians v. complex food humans

clothing modesty/style/relationships with fashion

fighting styles/strategies

entertainment complexity/differences

and language

☆

1st one, not much yet, im also making a separate post bc someone else asked me to talk abt that more 🥺

(tysm for all the enthusiastic asks guys <33)

anyway, basically hylian courting is a lot shorter, think “lesbians with the uhaul” type of energy, like sort of the classical medieval “does thee wish to pursue marriage with this one?” ← how hylians ask u out for the first time lmao

if it helps, they do tend to get to know one another well, talking about morals/kids/life goals/preferred lifestyle/house/etc. pretty clearly and quickly, then using the in between time to sort of stew on that information

id say the total time is sort of something like 6 months? maybe 3/4 if they're really compatible

(so bc i love interpreting video game logic for real world building, I actually blame this on how fast Zelda/link get together in games despite having sometimes never met before that moment lol)

like i said, ill be posting about this later

2nd one!!

pretty basic, just saying we don't really see hylians in big groups, despite the organizations they form, like kingdoms/knights or on a more personal level, towns/families/etc.

(once again, in-game appearances/video game logic translated to real life to draw these conclusions)

like not only are family units pretty small, like nuclear family setup, with like 2 parents and 2 kids, or single parent 1 kid type of situation, but the towns or collections of these families arent very big either

hylians kind of use their government the way it was intended lmao?

like the villages and towns matter more for everyday decisions than the kingdom/royalty, like Zelda would esstientally just be the mayor of Castle Town for those constant decisions,

while occasionally is called on to make decisions like for several towns or like is a natural disaster happens

meanwhile humans are, in comparison, in Way Bigger groups, both on an organization scale, and a personal scale

like u have all these specific branches of government, whereas im sure the population difference doesn't help,

and on a personal level, humans can easily have like multiple parents, lots of siblings, and once u combine that with each parent having family too, and those families like to meet up? All together??

yeah, itd look insane to any hylians (who’s smaller extended family may just make up their own village and that's it)

3. I've touched on this

like the use of spices, syrups, seasonings, etc

but also the complexity of dishes too, like chilling cream and mixing it for awhile to make ice cream, or even just getting ordering a pizza,

that's a lot of processing, like making the dough from flour and other ingredients, to letting it rise, to making the tomato paste, making cheese, then combining those things with any other toppings, all into one dish??

i like to think that hylians have only just started to touch on actual complicated cooking processes (as in BOTW, where they sell flour and salt, so people besides Link/Wild must know what to do with it)

this has the advantage of impressing any hylian with what a “creative genius” you are lol

4. look im just a fan of medieval time periods Links

so i think its funny if the hylians are used to like 4/3 layers and ur over here like, “wym, if i take off my shirt there's nothing underneath?”

one of them gets bold enough to ask, “d-do you not. do you not have undergarments??”

you “just my boxers? like just to cover my di-”

also this makes its easy to seduce people here? LMAO

clothes are def higher quality, after all there's not as many artificial processes or materials interfering,

plus u usually get some sick embroidery on it too!!

5. so like i get it, Link is the main fighter in games

but like, the few times there is a war/army in loz games, there's rlly not a lot of strategy, beyond just finding the enemy and fighting

tho im partial to that hylians/most inhabitants of Hyrule abide by the “lets meet up either literally by inviting each other or just between our territories to fight”

with occasional guerilla warfare (by any means necessary/stealth/ambush attacks/strategy) that's only rlly used either by Demise/Ganon, or by the wilder individuals/races in games

or maybe even the more civilized fighters in an emergency

and so that means by this logic that all of the Chain use kind of wild techniques compared to their race/kingdom lmao

id imagine its not too surprising to also see “every fight is a bar fight if its for my life” from individual travelers, so im sure they're not viewed too crazy (esp when ppl know their the hero that constantly has to deal with guerilla warfare from Ganon)

but its be hilarious to watch the reactions of both the Links realizing they’re in a bigger group that should be using “proper” fighting strategies and seeing the general publics reaction to this absolutely feral, armed to the teeth, trained hylians with their equally wild human lol

LMAO everyone thinks ur the reason they started using the more brutal fighting methods bc ur human, ur a bad influence lol

(humans would use it primarily, esp after we converted to use that method in warfare a couple hundred years ago i think?)

changing course a bit, hylians tend to use weapons (to compensate for difference in strength compared to humans, and since they don't experience/get a lesser version of adrenaline)

while humans tend to equally rely on weapons and our body as a weapon (marital arts/basic self-defense)

6. this is mostly bc the hylians only rlly seem to have the basics of music, books/stories, theater, and art

i have, surprise surprise, another post abt how i think this came to be,

mostly based on how human curiosity is indomitable and insatiable and the endless force that has not yet met its immovable object.

or at least an immovable object they haven't at least poked a little, out of curiosity lol

like we went to space for that reason, we reach the most dangerous corners of our planet (deep underwater/volcanoes) out of sheer curiousity/for the sake of simple knowledge of the thing

so needless to say, curiosity can absolutely drive any field to its limits, including the arts, which is why we can have stained glass, or movies/tv shows, hell, the marvel that is Hatsune Miku lmao

(fully for entertainment, a projection of light and sound, what is essentially magical illusions but u did it hte hard way, to the hylians)

on a different entertainment related note, i don't know if the hylians would be super into sports, or not really at all? mostly bc they have to use their fighting/training against real threats, not the sort of “fake” threats that sports are

but on the other hand i could see people like knights wanting to use their abilities for something other than violence and fighting bc their life or their villages lives depended on it

bet the Links would enjoy it for those reasons especially, what with at least sumo wrestling being a sport or activity for them at some point in history, and practically beg u for any new games to play, or to ref their games, bc whewwww

im sure they could get pretty competitive lol

7. obviously, their mostly influenced by the Japanese language

id almost like to imagine a sort of, if not outright Japanese (like with earlier heroes like Sky) then a sort of English-Japanese hybrid further along the line

sort of like how English has German/Greek/Latin roots and therefore u can see what words or structure comes from where, or even how u can understand a fair amount of basic words when other languages share the same roots (english, pants = spanish, pantalones)

would make for some funny miscommunications

or even better, most hylians liking ur unique accent or the Links love to hear u talk bc of it lol

☆

well the fever has broken, i am now free of the sickness that made me hack this up geez

i hope u got some enjoyment out of these my beloved anon!! esp since u were so nice as to ask abt it <33

hope u guys have a great weekend, look out for some more posts, bc its been great to get some more asks in lately and very motivating,

not to mention i actually have time to write now that my siblings graduated/we’ve moved several states over 💀

so i have reliable internet now too! sheesh :’)

Peace out,

🌙

[ronintales]

So When I Die. | Gojo Satoru

𝐒𝐘𝐏𝐍𝐎𝐒𝐈𝐒 | following gojo satoru’s death, his ex wife is in charge of taking care of his funeral service and everything else that comes with it.

𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓 | 4,676 words

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 | character death, possible spoilers, funeral, angst, mentions of not eating, and not proofread ;p

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒 | I did NAWT want this to be my first work on here but due to certain circumstances…. AHEM his DEATH!!!! I felt it was necessary because laik… grief LOL. I wrote this a while back tho. Enjoy.

Your ex-husband is dead, and in his line of work, yes, you know that he has a higher risk of dying than the average person, but still, death never comes expected, does it? Even if he always says—oh wait… used to, you suppose, say that he was crazy strong and no one could ever take him down. Well, he was wrong in the end like a bunch of other things. Like how well he took care of you, how he’d give you six kids, how—you won’t ramble, noting he’s dead now and there’s no point, but also because it’s quite rude of you to talk down on someone who is dead and can’t defend themselves. Whatever.

You just… don’t expect it. Yes, you understood he was hard headed and insanely cocky, but in a way… you always believed that he would always come home alive and, even if he did get hurt, he would be okay eventually as he heals. You don’t forget it, he’s only human, you know because of the many mistakes he’s made, but still… he’s… he’s gone?

You hesitated when you heard that. Gojo Satoru, the so-called love of your life from two years ago, is dead? Impossible, you think. Gojo Satoru found death embarrassing, with all the things he said. He said that he would be okay. He was always okay. What are you supposed to say to that?

When you get the call, you wonder why you, of all the people in his life, were the one they called to inform about his status. Why did you have to go to his place and clean out all his things? Take all his belongings with you? At first, your instinct was to say “throw it all away,” because what does Gojo Satoru mean to you now? You’re not his wife! He neglected you for years and filled your days and nights with sorrows. He broke your heart. But still, he didn’t mean nothing to you at the same time.

Those precious years of being his acquaintance in middle school. When you had shorter hair and he didn’t know much about you other than you were in his class and he had bought you cute white socks for your class gift exchange on Christmas that year. The long years that Gojo Satoru pined for you after you both attended the same high school. The hard and dark times he went through losing Suguru and shutting you out, though he loved you for so long. When you turned twenty, and Satoru had gotten better, to the point where he felt he was ready to move on and continue with his pursuit for you. When you turned twenty-three, and got married to him on a spur. When you moved in and shared a bed, until the marriage got cold and most nights you spent alone.

You couldn’t say for the past fourteen years, Gojo Satoru was nothing at all to you. The news was shocking, and knowing he was dead… did you have to be careful about how you felt about him, or how you thought of him? Well, now that he is dead, should you be so ruthless and hostile toward the man who broke your heart? You don’t know, so naturally, and it really just slips out, you agree to take care of the process of his passing.

For the most part, you’re calm. You don’t actually know how to feel, and you don’t know how to be. You’re not his wife, you have no obligations to take care of him, or anything that he cared about. Yet, you’re here. In his lonely apartment that doesn’t even smell like him. He probably never even spent much time in this place, even so, he still had a lot of belongings. Pictures of you in frames surprisingly. He did take them all when you got divorced and he moved out of the house, you just didn’t expect that he’d put them up on display. He probably didn’t get many visitors to question him about the lady in his pictures. You were sure that would get annoying.

Anyway, you don’t know if you’re supposed to cry or even feel sad. You don’t know if it’s strange to feel that way or not. You can’t quite make out how you feel, being surrounded by Gojo Satoru’s personality and things. You don’t think too much about the things inside the apartment because you don’t want to be too reminded of what you used to be. What you felt about the man once upon a time. If there was still love in your heart for him.

Gojo Satoru wasn’t a slob, but he wasn’t clean either by any means. Given he probably didn’t stay here much, it made sense that you didn’t need to clean a whole lot of the apartment. You get there and you take it all in. Satoru’s little apartment, because he didn’t want to pay for such a luxurious place he wouldn’t even stay in. Maybe that kind of place made him feel more alone too. Thoughts you should not be thinking start to trickle into your brain, but you stop yourself. You shouldn’t feel bad for leaving, nor should you want to go back. You made a decision to leave and you should honor it. It was the right thing to do for yourself (hopefully).

Do you even want his things? No, not really. But you have a keep, donate, and a throw away bin anyway. Most of it keeps going to the keep bin and donation box. Somehow the feeling of someone else getting Gojo Satoru’s things is unsettling to you, but it’s even worse to think that all these things will just go to a landfill where things that were once valued are forgotten and it’s all going to be considered “trash.” Maybe that’s because you know why every item is there and the story behind that certain mug or decor piece. You don’t know it, but you’re trying your best not to care.

You sigh, the thought that this is all so strange, bothering and pestering you like an annoying fly. You tell yourself you know that already, so stop thinking about it. Maybe you’re in denial that Gojo Satoru is actually gone. You can feel him. He’s still there, you know it. That or you’re just surrounded by his belongings and that’s why his presence is here.

In your hand, you hold a big black garbage bag as you make your way to his bedroom to clear out his closet. This is a room of his that you haven’t been to, strange right? You wondered if another woman spent time here. Jealous much? You’re supposed to be clearing out your ex-husband’s apartment, not pondering about what he was up to after you two had split. The man is dead for one, what are you going to do about it? Confront his dead body? You shouldn’t be thinking about things like that, so that thought is one you shake off and ignore too.

You sigh because you’re tired from cleaning all day and clearing his things out and you’re probably only a quarter’s way done with the place. It’s not even that big, it’s just been uncomfortably hard for you to bring yourself here with your mixed and strange feelings about this whole situation. Isn’t there anyone else who cares about Gojo Satoru? How come you’re stepping up to the plate when this is how you feel—confused and unsure? What are you even going to do for the funeral? You took the task up because Gojo Satoru would probably turn in his grave knowing the higher ups organized his funeral. So while it is strange for you to do all of this, you’ve rationalized the lot of this situation that you put yourself in. Once upon a time, he loved you right? So surely he would prefer you over—you’re so silly, thinking all these things when Gojo Satoru is your dead ex-husband.

You plop on the bed with a small groan as you turn over. This is a bit inappropriate, to be laying on your ex husband’s unmade bed. It’s left in the state that it was the last time he woke up. That’s a little precious you think, freely, not even denying it. Are you ruining this precious thing here? Well, in all honesty, you’re kind of cherishing it, because this is a small piece of Satoru that is really still here in the present times. He always liked soft things and this blanket is soft. The sheets still smell like your ex-husband. The light musk of his skin and his soap is there. The thought of this bed being his is comfortable enough. Like you miss his warmth and touch, you curl up on the mattress, hugging yourself to the scent of him surrounding, and you can almost imagine that he’s holding you right now, like he used to. His detergent is faintly there too, well actually, it’s the same as yours. He asked when you two had split and he was settling into his own place all the household items you used. You supposed that it was all he knew.

You offered to go shop for household things with him and it was probably the last time you two had exchanged any kind of affection. You let him put his hand on your thigh as he drove you two to the supermarket. He let you link your arm with his, sides flush together like you two didn’t just get divorced. It was a silent message of “I miss you,” because it was and—quite frankly, still is—hard to get over someone you loved for so long. Even if he left the marriage long before you did, emotionally and physically. This was something you wanted while you married, for Satoru to present, and in your arms. For him to show you that he cared and loved you. You were even a little upset that was the only time he was doing all of that for you, but you chose not to ruin the moment for the both of you.

Funny how all these memories and things between the two of you are flooding in constantly. It makes you feel kind of sick. Nauseous and unable to breathe. You open your eyes in realization of what you’re doing right now. You sit up immediately, flustered and embarrassed as if Satoru would open the door right now and have that annoying smug grin on his face with his arms crossed, just to say as he leans on the door frame, “I knew you missed me.” Following with your name because he liked your name the best. He always said your name was pretty and he wouldn’t give you a pet name because nothing will ever be as great as calling you by your name. A nice little reminder that Satoru loved your name makes you smile a bit. Weird how all of these just keep piling up. One thought triggers another and it almost makes you itch and feel bad for the way things ended between the two of you. You almost have regrets about—

Whatever, you have a deadline to clean this place up you remind yourself. You spread your palms out on the sheets once more, feeling every thread that Satoru once laid his body on. You should take these for your bed, you think. They’re not so bad, just a plain white sheet, but it reminds you of Satoru’s hair and it would be waste.You lift yourself from the bed and open his closet, not even noticing how you keep having to make excuses for yourself to keep some of his things.

Already feeling overwhelmed because you keep holding back, opening the closet makes you feel like you’re cracking. You let out a suppressed sound. You can’t even register what it sounds like. A squeak or something? But looking at all his clothes almost makes everything so real for you. All his uniform? All his coats and sweaters? Ah, the one from high school. And then you can see all the ones you bought him. Damn, does that really test your strength.

Lined up neatly and nicely put away, it’s almost a shame to you to give these away. Your hand shakes as you hesitantly reach for one of his favorite button ups. Your skin meets the soft fabric and you only lightly touch it because you don’t want to wrinkle it. You remember when you used to iron Satoru’s clothes early in the morning before he woke up. Even until the end of your marriage, you still ironed them.

You look up, reaching for his work uniform. This is what he wore most often, you know that. So you let yourself crumble. Carefully taking off the hanger and sitting on his bed as you hold the shirt close to you. You bring it to your nose, just to smell it. You wish it smelled like Satoru more, but even so, it makes you break down.

Tears prickle at the corners of your eyes as you take another sniff. The thought that Satoru really isn’t here anymore makes your heartbreak. It comes crashing down on you. You really miss him, and you regret that you didn’t spend as much time as you would have liked to with him. You wish you could have had the courage to tell him how much you still cared and loved him. Yes, it might not have been the same kind of love you had for him before, but you did still love him.

You let out a little sob. In frustration and despair, tears flow out as you hold his clothes close to you. The walls of your bruised heart collapses as you hold his clothes so tight as if he was still in them. Well, you really do wish he was. You’re desperate to feel him in your arms physically. Just a moment with him so you could say your last sentiments. Just a moment to see him again. Just a moment to love him.

You’re helpless as your tears flow endlessly onto his shirt. You feel silly, but you just can’t stop. You really miss Satoru, and you have been for so many months now. You stroke the shirt as you would his body, wallowing in the grief you’re supposed to feel, even if the dead man is your ex-husband. You spent so many years loving him, how could you just not feel anything to hear news of his death? How could you not feel any regret or remorse for how messy you left things with him? There’s so many things you want to say to him, and it kills you to know you will never get to say any of it to him.

You wonder if Satoru was still around, would he wrap his arms around you and tell you not to cry? Would he kiss your temple like he always did when you were down? You wish he would just do all of it. You wish you two could have tried harder. Your love for him never burned out, you know that much. It’s the reason why you’re here, alone in his room crying as you hold his clothes dearly to you. And even if you hate to say it, even if you don’t want to admit it, Satoru loved you until the very end too.

“I’m still in love with you y’know…”

“Shut up,” You mutter as you slide the eggs off the pan for the hungry man at the table.

It was the dead hours of the night when he returned from a mission, knocking on your door, telling you that he was hungry and needed a place to crash.You slammed the door on him of course, but he wedged his foot in the gap of the door (no, it didn’t hurt, he’s got magical powers that prevent him from actually getting hurt like damn maniac) and used his strength against you to push his upper body through the door to beg you to let him stay. It was a mistake on your part, but it actually wasn’t all that terrible that night. You were just bitter.

“My bad,” Satoru said dramatically as he took a bite. “Just thought you missed me. That’s the reason you let me in, right?”

You narrowed your eyes at him, not in the mood for any of his games. His smug grin made everything even worse, because he was right. “Gojo Satoru, wipe that grin off your face.”

“Must have hit a nerve,” He teased like it was still appropriate to do so.

You actually don’t even remember what you said then after that, but you just know… Gojo Satoru has you all figured out yet… he never said anything about it to you. And that was just him. He knew well enough not to break your heart one more time, but he was selfish enough to constantly flirt with you any time he could. If he passed by, or was coming home late from a mission and knocking on your door to remind you that he existed. Not anymore.

After cleaning his apartment, it’s all empty now. Which is a little strange. You’ve never even been to his place until after he died, and yet… it makes your stomach turn and feel upset after realizing that this place is no longer where your ex-lover resides. You understand that he’s no longer occupying it. There’s no point in keeping it for him. But maybe because you don’t think it through while you’re still in the grieving process. You don’t think about Gojo Satoru being dead because you don’t want to. It makes your heart squeeze and your breath stop. You can’t face the fact that he no longer exists and you can no longer see him anymore. You just can’t, so you wonder: where will his home be? Who's going to take care of him? Where is he going to go to shelter himself from the rain or snow? Where is he going to sleep? Where can he feel safe and secure?

You sigh, rubbing your eyes. You really need to get some proper rest. You feel yourself withering in the bitter feelings you still have toward Satoru, but also the dangerous sorrow that’s sinking your whole body down. You can’t believe that you really miss Gojo Satoru after all this time hating him and wishing you two had never met when he was here and alive, waiting for you to just cave into what your heart wanted. Truth is though, you never would. You were too strong for that.

Finally, you pack up the final things, leaving absolutely nothing behind. Satoru isn’t here anymore, and it looks exactly like that. This little corner of the world isn’t his anymore, and you’d like to say that it never was because he didn’t spend much of his time in this place. It’s just sad to see it all gone, stripped to the bare white box it actually is without the fun of your late ex-husband. You shut the door, leaving this place behind and bringing this part of Satoru with you, maybe the only part of Satoru that is still worldly and able for you to have in your grasp. You leave the key to his apartment on the landlord’s desk and leave with the rest of Satoru’s things in your arms, all thrown in the cardboard box labeled “Satoru” in your handwriting with a permanent marker. Silly of you to not even realize it, Gojo Satoru’s home is not a place, it’s you.

The end of it was the funeral process. Which was much more work than cleaning his apartment. You wish somebody was worried about your well-being, but that somebody, the most likely candidate, was dead. Satoru would have told you to chill out a bit and ask you to wind down with him, but this is his funeral, he can’t really do that now, can he? But you don’t want to seem like you’re so reliant on him. You’ve done plenty of things without him, and this will be no exception. He just… sort of made the process easier and bearable. You’re on your 10th phone call with the carpenters of the coffin when you really wish you didn’t take on the task of carrying out Satoru’s dying wishes. He didn’t even have many, because he was so sure he wasn’t going to die so soon.

Through it all, you hold yourself together quite elegantly. Even through the eulogy. No one would even guess the mental strain you put yourself through to make this all happen. All the floral arrangements are beautiful, Satoru’s corpse is dressed nicely—though you grace him with a closed casket funeral because you were sure that he did not want anyone to see him so vulnerably lifeless and you simply could not handle the sight of his stale and unresponsive body. But everyone could indeed tell, Gojo Satoru was loved. They could understand your love for the man. You wouldn’t have done it if you didn’t love him. But you just deny it.

His guest list was quite large. Some people you didn't even know, and you were sure he did not want that. But the higher ups had their own agenda too, and you had to make compromises though you stood your ground quite well for the sake of your late ex-husband's well being in the afterlife. You wonder, would Satoru love you for eternity for loving and caring for him unconditionally and so thoroughly? When you eventually join him, will he thank you for so meticulously planning and giving him a proper send off? You hope so. You hope that he will continue to love you in the next lifetime, and in that lifetime, you two will be happily together. Not miserably apart like you are now.

Maybe the only time anyone can see you break is when the casket is lowered and this is the last time that you’ll ever see Satoru’s face again, except you don’t. His casket is closed and covered with all the flowers you bought to send him off beautifully. There’s a complex look on your face, and no one could quite read it, but it was clear that there was a storm going on inside of you, stirring and rumbling. Your eyebrows knitted together and your eyes glossy with a down turn of your lips. You’re just keeping yourself together for Satoru. You need to.

The only time you get to break down about it is when you get home from the long day. Crumbling down your door, as you miserably sob. How could the world be so possibly cruel that you had to bury the last man you loved for the past ten years? It never gave you time to move on. You weren’t ready to let go just yet and be content with the distance. Sure, you asked for it when he was still tangible, but now he was untouchable, not existing, and it felt so painful. You curl up in a ball, on the bed you used to share with him. The bed you two used to gossip on and the bed where you simply just held him to sleep on your good days. The bed that you laid alone for most nights wishing he’d come to hold you and not be too tired for you. All the bad and good memories come to make you think of one thing; you wish Satoru was here right now.

You lay there, contemplating if you just want to stay there for the whole week or get up and cook yourself something. You haven’t been eating with how hectic it’s been to take care of Satoru’s send off. You sigh, closing your eyes. Sleep sounds like the best thing to you at the moment. You were drained and exhausted from preserving the life of Gojo Satoru as well as commemorating it. You needed that rest.

When you drift into sleep, you kind of hope that Satoru is there for you, waiting in a field of beautiful flowers like he came to visit you in a dream. Even if it’s just your imagination. You’d like to think that he cared enough that he left you alone to deal with all of the things he left behind. He doesn’t though, because you don’t dream. You just black out and you wonder if you’ll ever dream again. But maybe you’re just being dramatic because you miss your ex-husband so much. You blink the tears out from your eyes, wiping them before getting up and pulling yourself together. You can be sad, but not miserable. You were never the type to just crumble, however, even this shook you down to the very ground and yes, it is hard to get back up. But everything with Satoru was hard, and this was no different. You should have been used to this.

Eventually, you do get yourself together. Sad, but you’re functioning. You go back to work and you continue with your daily life. Satoru’s never really been a part of your daily routine after the 3rd year of being married to him. It was no different not seeing him at all, but it was just the fact that he truly wasn't there anymore. If you were to call his cell, it would just ring on your dresser in your room and go to voicemail. Sometimes, you wait for the voicemail just to hear his voice, but most times you stay away from his contact. You’re recovering, just slowly.

People at work send their condolences, just like they did when they found out you divorced Gojo Satoru. They give you a pitiful look and tell you to be strong, but when they think you’re not listening they bash Satoru for passing and still putting the responsibility of carrying his will out on his ex wife—you. You don’t defend him nor does what they say settle well with you. They’re right, of course. Gojo Satoru has always been selfish, up until his last breath, but you just can’t seem to feel validated when you’re the one who buried Gojo Satoru. He was once your whole world, how could you just completely numb yourself to the pain of losing your connection with him, absolutely and completely?

Apparently, you’re the only person on his will too. You inherit everything of his one day, and it’s kind of overwhelming. All of his money is transferred to your bank account, all his belongings, everything is yours. You don’t even know what to do with most of it. You don’t even want to look and use anything of his. So you store most of his things in a box and label it “Satoru,” along with the other things that you took from his apartment, and you make an account to store all his money in, for what? You don’t know, just something.

When you're older, you’ll come to realize that you made Satoru a loved person until the very end, and that you were perhaps the only person that he still had love for, even if you weren’t his wife anymore. This is why Satoru loved you so much, and yes, he got very lucky with you, you will give yourself that. But you also won’t feel so bitter about having to be the person to handle his departure because you made sure to do just the way he wanted it, by you. for now, you’ll miss him lots and bring him flowers whenever the time comes. You won’t call him your ex-husband, but your late-husband. You keep some of his clothes to wear like you used to. You still sleep on your side of the bed, leaving the space Satoru used to fill empty for him. Life goes on the way it used to.

[ratwife77]

Height Headcanons

The Outsiders

(These are all during the book)

Pony- solid 5’5- I honestly forgot how his height is described minus being taller than Johnny.. so I think he’d be just average ish for his age

Soda- 5’9 is average ish so.. he’s what girls expect? He’s standard? But he does give a shorter vibe which is why he’s not taller

Darry- 6’2 do I need to explain?

Two-Bit: 5’11 he’s just lanky I can’t see him as being short

Dallas- 5’10 I feel like he’s sort of lean but not too tall, just above average.. intimidating presence but not a wall like Darry and not quite Two-Bit’s height

Steve- 5’7 he should be shorter but I think he should at least be taller than Pony.. give him that

Johnny- 5’4 he would have had some more growing to do, but he’d always be below average

Tim- 5’11 intimidating, sort of lean but more wall-like than Dallas.

Curly- 5’6 he has more growing to do, but not a lot.. he is pissed about his height ngl

Angela- 5’2 I don’t think she’d be above average

Cherry- 5’5 I think she’d be taller because she’d wear heels often but this is her actual height

Marcia- 5’7 she gives either short or tall vibes but I don’t like huge height differences for ships.. I’m sorry but I do ship Marbit on the side and 4 inches is enough..

Bob- 6’0 I think it’s important for the story- he needs to really look over both Johnny and Ponyboy, but I also want Darry to be a greater presence (to those against him anyway) so that’s why he’s shorter than him.

Randy- 5’11, similar build to Two-Bit, lanky

Sylvia- 5’9 no question.. just trust me I know she told me

Evie- 5’1 someone had to be my height okay

Sandy- 5’4 she, like Soda, is good looking so I think she should be about average so she’s perceived as the standard

Tex (please let there be someone who cares about Tex lol)

Tex- 5’6 I imagine him to have a sturdy, decent build like Pony, but be a little taller, maybe just a little muscular- he’s not in peak form but he’s well off

Mason- he was in basketball.. 6’1.. he’s slim but lean and able to kick butt

Johnny- 5’7, him and Tex are of similar build.. if they grew up together and are still friends, I’d like to represent them growing together metaphorically and literally

Jamie- 5’6 1/2, she’s gotta be taller than Tex I feel it in my bones.. but her brother is taller than her

Cole- 6’2 built like a brick wall- I want him to be taller than Mason because it’s kind of who he wants to be, literally looking up to him(at least I think, I don’t remember everything)

Robert- tbh I forgot who he was mostly.. I’m so sorry but I think he’d be 5’10

Pop- 5’10 this has a purpose. Mason is quite literally growing past him, resenting him for not living his other son, while during most of the book, Tex is stuck looking up to him

Lem.. nobody likes you but here- 5’9 just your average absolute slimeball (nobody likes Pop either I just forgot to put that because I got off on a ramble about symbolism through height..)

Mrs. Johnson- 5’7 (with heels nobody knows her real height), kind of an adult that is helpful to Tex so she’s taller than him.. you get what I’m saying, sort of like Pop

I had to look on the wiki to remember everyone, hopefully that’s everyone who’s important

Rumble Fish (I have a bad memory.. hopefully all the details are right)

Motorcycle Boy- everything hinges on his height, because everyone looks up to him. 6’3 final height (taller than Darry.. more separate from his world.. away from others.. you get it)

Rusty James- he grows to be as tall as Motorcycle Boy, emphasizing his ‘becoming’ him.. but during the book- main events anyway, he’s 5’7, tall for his age

Steve- 5’3 he’s short, sort of removed from Rusty, different

Patty- 5’5

Smokey- sort of under the radar and clever, so I’ll put him at 5’5 ‘under’ Rusty.. hopefully that makes sense

Biff- 5’11

B.J.- he’s probably like 5’6, above Smokey because he’s loyal, not low to the ground like a snake (I’m not making fun of short people I am one it’s just for metaphorical purposes)

Mr. James- sort of different like Motorcycle Boy, keeps up better than Rusty James if I remember correctly.. 5’10, closer to him

Mrs. James- idk I don’t remember but let’s say 5’7

Just noticed the error with Mrs. James- please ignore the pictured height for her

[cyandreamzaceattorney]

✦ AA girls getting boba tea ✦

A few days ago I felt like drawing Ema, Kay, Maya and Franziska hanging out and drinking boba tea, cuz I really like the idea of these four having a friendship group :-D however, I unfortunately couldn't fit all four characters in so I (mostly) cut Franziska from the pic. Sorry Fran fans! I do love her but, I wanted to draw the other three girls a bit more (cuz that's just the mood I was in) and didn't want to stray away from this specific concept as I felt really inspired to draw them walking while chatting with boba tea.

Overall I do like how this picture came out, even if I definitely rushed it a bit (I think this was mostly because I got hyped over getting time to draw again, cuz I've been busy on and off). Unfortunately I lost my favourite brush liner before doing lineart on this and halfway threw my other liner magically dried up! So that was frustrating but, I worked around it and want to regain confidence in using fine liners so kind of a useful problem lol. I also decided to change up how I draw Kay in my art style a little and I think I like it :3 And, really like the outfits I gave the girls. Even if they are simple. They're also summer outfits because Australia is once again breaking the record for hottest summer (and it's still technically spring (⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠；⁠)). Fun fact, Ema is wearing a striped shirt as a reference to the stripe motifs in her aai design!

Now time for boba tea hc's cuz why not XD. Maya has a Taro milk tea with the regular black pearls, because it's purple and in my mind Taro and chocolate being her favourite flavours just makes sense. Kay has a iced tea with lychee jelly (mainly cuz I didn't feel like colouring the jelly but I see Kay liking lychee), idk what flavour her tea is, but it's probably a fruit flavour cuz in my experience ice teas are often fruit flavours. I also have the random hc that whenever Kay gets boba around Miles she gets a weird combo (e.g. chocolate milk tea with green apple pearls) just to see his upset reaction lol.

Ema and Franziska also have boba, you just can see it cuz Ema has them in a shopping bag which Kay is in front of. As for flavours, Ema's is definitely chocolate milk tea cuz her snacks in the English version of the games seem to be similar to tee vee snacks (idk if tee vee snacks are a thing in us, if they aren't they are small long cookies cotted in chocolate, kinda like pocky but much shorter, but thicker and fully coated) though I can also see her getting brown sugar with black pearls. Franziska I could see getting something like the regular tea flavour (which is called "Thai tea" or "original flavour" depending on the boba shop I go to) with no pearls or jelly because in my mind she doesn't like them :P, in general I don't think she'd like a lot of sweet flavours but that's because I hc her as not liking sweet food for no logical reason, my brain has simply decided this ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Hope you all enjoy this drawing and my super austic ramble about what boba tea I think these fictional characters drink XD

Next traditional drawing will be in a new sketcbook as I'm almost finished this one (and the last pages won't be as fanart so I won't post them here). I'm shocked cuz I haven't finished a sketchbook in less than a year for several years now! But this makes sense because I drew a lot this year for several reasons :-P

[robotsandramblings]

me reading the "new" "canon" heights for the Bad Batch on starwars.com:

nooo thank you, don't like those, i'll stick to the wookiepedia + my headcanons version lol ✌️

i'll save my overall analysis & ramblings for under the readmore

(here's the og thread that brought it to my attention. make sure to read op's corrected version!)

(p.s. the height chart was done by me on heightcomparison.com, it's not an official star wars image -- but the data matches starwars.com)

first off, i will acknowledge that visually, in the show, their heights are always a tricky thing. i've been referencing a bajillion screenshots since i came upon this thread. their comparative heights change in like every screenshot, due to camera angles and/or where they're standing relative to each other. we never get to see all five (5) of them standing shoulder-to-shoulder, side-by-side, in a single straight line, with an eye-level camera shot*.

i'll also acknowledge that i've always just gone off of what wookiepedia says, because it's the closest to an 'official' source that we've ever had -- but it's still not the official source. Here's the wookiepedia version, btw:

and you know what? depending on what screenshot you look at, these can both seem right. sometimes, Tech looks as tall as Crosshair; other times, Tech looks close to Echo's height. (Tech is also rarely at full height -- he's usually got his head and shoulders bent down to read his datapad. i think he slouches too.) i also find Hunter's height varies a lot too, depending on the shot.

Personally, i will be following the wookiepedia version. i think the starwars.com numbers are way, way off. (Warning: here's where the ranting part begins lol)

Wrecker has never, ever been a full head taller than Tech, Echo, or Hunter. what the actual fuck lmaooo

and 7 inches taller than Crosshair?? i don't think so lads

they're tryin' to tell me Echo is shorter than reg height??? bullshit lol. and Tech too??? also bullshit lmao

i refuse to believe Tech is only 2cm taller than Hunter; Tech should be, at minimum, 2 inches taller than Hunter.

i feel Omega's height can vary in the show, like Tech or Hunter as i mentioned. sometimes she seems very small, sometimes she seems taller than i remember.

that all said, i think the height for Omega is correct... for Season 1**. but S2? and now in S3? she's definitely grown a bit.

so i guess if i had to come up with my own numbers, i'd go primarily with the wookiepedia data, with a few tweaks...

Omega**: at least 140cm / 4' 7''

Hunter: 180-181cm / 5' 11''

Echo: 185cm / 6' 1''

Tech: 190-193cm / 6' 3'' - 6' 4''

Crosshair: 193cm / 6' 4''

Wrecker: 198-200cm max / 6' 6''

(i will hold onto Short King Hunter with a death grip until i die. even though i'll admit he looks reg/Echo height in a lot of shots. but i just really love the idea that's he's juuuust under 6' !)

**My headcanon is that in S1, Omega was approximately 10 years old. (which would match with starwars.com data, since average height for a 10-yr-old = 127-137cm.) i'm assuming we're at least 2 years later by S3, so she should be 12, which should put her height at 140-162cm.

i think in the show, they're keeping her closer to 140cm, but i'm equally onboard with her being on the taller side, closer to 162cm. i like the idea that she will eventually grow to reg clone height of 6 feet, thus she'd be on the taller end of "average" child height.

*there is one singular screenshot i came across which might be the closest. however, it's only properly showing the OG four -- Echo is in the shot, but disproportionately in front of them. it's also from their pilot in Clone Wars S7, which arguably was just a beginning stage for them, and changes were made before their own show aired, including the animation style/models.

it would explain where many of us got our idea of Tech = Crosshair same height. but Hunter is also nearly as tall as them?? certainly not 180cm lmao. so idk. take that as you will.

[remotepixel]

I love your stories so much!! I've really been wanting more platonic yandere marvel stories and yours are so amazing! Is it alright if you could write a platonic yandere bucky? ❤❤

I'm so happy you like my work (twirling my hair and giggling rn) <33

Also, thank you for requesting!!

Tw: Yanderes themes + stalking!

I think, at first, he wouldn’t want to be near you more than necessary.

-It sounds mean (and he definitely feels guilty) but the guy’s still trying to figure out what he’s going to do now, after years of being brainwashed and only having one goal.

-There’s a lot of internal confusion going on and adding yandere traits that he’s 99% sure are not normal only pushes him further towards the edge.

-However, if you stay persistent in getting to know him, or Steve encourages him to make new friends, he would hesitantly embrace these traits as part of his new life.

He definitely has a soft spot for you.

-His face would remain as stoic as ever (force of habit) but, around you, you would see a ghost of a smile he would never directly admit.

-He’ll joke around you, mainly sarcastic comments or the type of jokes that aren’t that funny but you laugh anyways, and would playfully shove you with an eyeroll if you make a stupid one back.

-He’ll listen to you explain all the new modern tech, complain about school - anything if it makes you happy.

-He would be wary of physical intimacy (especially because of his metal arm), but I think he would warm back up to it.

-He likes having your head lean on his shoulder, or messing up your hair despite your protest.

-It grounds him in a way, let’s him know he’s here, in this moment, and not freezing alone.

He wouldn’t be as outright controlling as some of the others.

-He knows what it feels like to be a passenger in your own life and wouldn’t want to inflict that onto someone else.

-Despite any thoughts he might have against it, he wouldn’t restrict what you do (unless it could put you in danger of course), even if it means not hanging out for a while.

Although, he might stalk you.

-He internally argues with himself every time he does it, but he’s just concerned for your safety.

-Apart from court-mandated therapy or talking to Steve, he suddenly has free time he doesn’t know how to fill.

-In his mind, he’s helping you and calming the swirling pit in his stomach whenever he thinks about you being in danger.

He’s overprotective, even if he tries to draw it back.

-Protecting you has become his new purpose and, despite all of the unlearning he’s being forced into, he still feels a sense of duty to carry out his role no matter what.

-He’ll keep a careful eye of any of your friends (he doesn’t even want to think of you getting a partner) to make sure they’re treating you how they should.

-If they’re not, then the ex-Winter Soldier will be having a nice conversation with them (the next day, they’re suddenly apologising and actively avoiding you).

-He doesn’t want to be known as that anymore but he can’t say his reputation doesn’t have any benefits.

Opening up to someone after everything he’s been through was only a pipe dream, something to promise Steve he’ll try but know he’ll never achieve. But, as he watches you ramble about your day, he allows himself to consider it possible.

I think this a bit shorter than normal I think but I was struggling lol

Also, I don't know where I got 1940s him being a fan of physical touch from but I added it so...

[fumiku]

Hear ye hear ye!

I come bringing two Dungeon Meshi marchil fanfics to share

Enough

He got crumbs of it in moments, here and there, and it would be more than enough to last the winter. Chil knew how to live on little, with only what he could afford. But love? Love he had had enough of for a lifetime.

I'll start with the shorter one that I wrote first, a quick Chilchuck POV 1.3k words oneshot that's bittersweet if not just plainly sad. It’s about repressing a crush essentially, but the marchil is mostly a front for a character study about Chilchuck’s complex feelings on his marital situation and love in general. I’ve been told many times in comments that even without shipping marchil it was enjoyable, so give it a shot if that sounds interesting!

He soaked her in, like hard bread softening in broth.

Grind Me Down Sweetly

Even years after their journey into the dungeon, Marcille wasn’t quite over her existential dread over short lifespans… And it showed. Every other day, she came by to Chilchuck’s locksmith shop with a shocking lack of locks to smith.

Coffeeshop au except it’s not an au and there’s no coffeeshop. This one is a long oneshot of 17k words, and contains flashbacks that are meant to loosely span over a year. This fic can pretty much be entirely read as platonic. They’re just close friends but they give married energy is all. Slice of life and cozy with a side of banter & tsundere behavior, and existential dread hurt/comfort as the cherry on the sundae. It contains some classic Dungeon Meshi things like storytelling through cooking and sharing meals~ If you like the Marcille and Chilchuck dynamic in canon, this is pretty much just a bunch of that, shenanigans abound!

She clung to her friends like time was always running out.

Blonde hair is the epitome of beauty to him meanwhile his greying hair brings her existential despair. I am composed and collected about this

"I am going to chase you out with a broom"

Some related-ish memes I made!

Extra author notes and marchil rambling under cut

With how chil is so irritable and private about romance and his feelings it makes sense that their romance would have passive-agressive energy. Are they just friends or pining? Oh wouldn’t you like to know. Are they just lightheartedly bantering or is he legitimately pissed or are they blinking in morse code their true feelings at each other? Yes

My post-canon timeline is Chilchuck lives a nice life living alone in his house-shop except his friends all visit him and care, and even though he likes living alone it’s also bittersweet and every corner of his life is haunted by the ones he loves and loved and the moments he had with them. That’s it that’s all I want… (mostly the nice life part lol)

My marchil manifesto is that she grows on him stubbornly like fungal yeast and it brings out his flavor like beer <3 Because she stubbornly puts her nose everywhere and refuses to give up on getting closer to her friends and it makes him open up and repress his feelings less and aaaa <33 Obligatory shout out to the dunmeshi discord serv for engaging with my rambles

For someone who dislikes alcohol I’m having so much fun working beer metaphors and stuff into the writing, Chilchuck has all the fun motifs to play with fr... Traps, lockpicking, married life, work, destitution, starvation, rejection, repression, opening urself up to the world. Give me the most domestic fluff and give it a subtle foundation of angst and hurt comfort 👌

And I do think that Marcille takes a particular interest in Chilchuck especially because he’s so set on being a closed book as well. Yeah she def is like 👀 at him. Aaah the way she wants to meet his family so bad 😭💕 I think she romanticizes him & his family life/idealizes him as a virtuous husband a lot too. Like how she tends to think of things in a more flowery story-like way.

I do compare him to bread and her to soup in that he soaks up in her warm vibes and softens up. Which has become a personal favorite. He was bread, she was soup, can I make it any more obvious /lyr Soggy bread Chilchuck is so funny to me. Like, you know that rock solid bread but then you soak it in soup and then it just becomes the softest crumbliest thing. I think Chilchuck is a really hard bread that will break your teeth if you don’t put him in some soup beforehand. Or wine. I wracked my brain a lot about what food Chil would like (because his Adventurer’s Bible profile just says he love alcohol and hates sweet dishes rip) and I end up giving him a bread motif a lot, since it pairs well with alcohol and whatnot.

With marchil I either do unrequited angst because Chilchuck will NOT allow himself to feel, or the most domestic fluffy shit ever but in a mostly platonic dimension because once again -gestures at Chilchuck- But in a true Marcille "If I was Chilchuck’s wife" Donato fashion she manages to get her nose into the most stubborn’s people stuff like a barnacle and it’s. So married people coded anyways. They’re a lil messed up but it’s ok they’ll iron out those bumps. Ironing because they are gonna do the most domestic chores together 🔥🔥 MARRIEDCORE I TELL YOU I should get around to making more fics and more different vibes though, I already have a bunch of prompts written down~

Even more rambling and headcanons!!

I hc that when he gets his shop all his living quarters are half-foot sized so whenever the party comes to visit they suffer sitting down at the dinner table and whatnot

There’s a very specific horror in not being able to grow old with your loved one… It’s gotta be rough being in a relationship where you don’t mature at the same speed/rate. It must be so heartbreaking to turn around and your lover suddenly looks 70 while you’re still like 26 Chilchuck living until he lives with either Meijack or Flertom or at the castle and spends his days grumbling about people being even more incompetent than they used to be real. He can live longer than 50 🙏 come on peepaw you can make it to 70. He’s got so many friends ready to nurse him, prob while he complains about it. This is why I find elderly half-foots a funny mental picture. For a while I wondered if half-foots aged visually much at all in the traditional sense, and then I remembered these.

In my post-canon headcanons I’ve adopted the idea that Marcille doesn’t do her hair, it’s always someone else making her hairdos like an attendant or Kabru and like maybe Falin learns. In the "it takes a village to raise someone" community mutual aid energy… And the rare times where the task befalls Chilchuck he learns how to put it in a single braid (even if it’s so much hair for him to hold in his small hands all at once rip) because the one time he braided it in two in canon it reminded him of Meijack and gave him psychic damage. WHICH. Ohhh my god you have no idea how much I care about Chilchuck’s daughters now. After writing the first half of Grind Me Down Sweetly I am forever changed I know them all by name and know everything there is to know about them, I am making so many headcanons every day… Meijack wears thigh-high boots because she hates when sand, dirt or snow gets in her shoes- I have fanart coming up of them over at @fuumiku and I’d love making fics centered around them as well eventually yippee The angst of old senile Chilchuck still tying marcille's hair... Old senile chilchuck confusing marcille for one of his daughters… "Have you gotten taller? Oh how much you’ve grown" -breaking his neck looking up at her- I want Chilchuck to get the top notch elder treatment.

Ok this is the alcoholism tangent. I really want to believe Chilchuck can be super old, but… Realistically he’s gonna drink himself to an early grave, he’s a work hard play hard kinda guy.

Marcille would be horrified if she knew the extent of it fr fr, but I do think it’d drive a wedge between them if she tried getting him to lay off of it… If he’s open to it though that’d be so nice and sweet. Hey hey btw did you know, Chilchuck is canonically underweight due to extremely strict dieting and alcohol can act as a good hunger suppressant! Lots of issues to dig into here It’d be cute if his daughters visit him often and collectively keep tabs on him in a caring way. It’s less cute actually beinh the daughter and having to deal with it but- CHILCHUCK IS WORTH IT okay!!! Where’s that meme of "You can fix him? So is 5 other people y’all look like a construction crew" bc this increasingly looks like ‘Marcille Senshi Laios Izutsumi and his family make sure he doesn’t poison himself like a dog with chocolate’ mission.

Truly for some people reason just flies out the window when it comes to alcohol, coherence gives way to excuses. He reminds of someone I know who got a grave disease that’s worsened by alcohol and just. Continues to take it regularly. You know that thing that’s said where "an alcoholic parent will have 2 kids, one will grow to be alcoholic too while the other will never touch a drop of alcohol" and Chilchuck is def the first I think. He gives the vibe that he’d say "An alcoholic parent puts a strain on familial relationships?? Pshh, my father was and look at me! I turned out great!". I don’t think Chil could really get shaken out of it at this point tbh, seems very ingrained in him, would prob fight it back. I relate with my own familial situation ughh. Maybe if he realized how it hurt the people around him and not only himself though…. I’d def like to see him ease up on it. Drinking is often a social activity though. That gives me hope, especially with the whole dunmeshi lesson of sharing meals, that he might be able to/have recontextualized how or when he likes to take alcohol, that alcohol is better when you have others with you and you’re still able to talk and whatnot. Chilchuck says that he’s pretty picky with alcohol tho, like he has specific tastes or a high bar. Laios can ban good beer in the kingdom and then Chilchuck just stops because it all tastes awful and he’s not rich enough to import. The brewery he likes mysteriously burns down in a fireball incident one night. Marcille risks prison for her loved ones part 2, now with diplomatic immunity! ✨

I have hcs about Chil’s family dynamic, about his daughters and how alcoholism or workaholism may have affected everyone (not me inferring that Puckpatti being the most idealistic and optimistic from Chil’s daughters is probably a result from her being the youngest and perhaps Chil being the most often at work during that time and so she was mostly raised by her mother without much involvement from him). That’s a topic for another day though, for now I leave you all with thoughts of Flertom painting flowers on a shitty ceramic mug when she was 3 and Chil begrudgingly asking Marcille advice on picking a birthday gift for Puckpatti :) Oh yeah, because if we look at the timeline in The Adventurer’s Bible and combine it with when Chilchuck said that "Due to certain circumstances he hasn’t seen his wife or daughters in years" in the Senshi backstory chapter, besides letters with Flertom he has seemingly not seen them in 4 years. 4 YEARS. Thank god dungeons disappeared, it took that much for him to retire

[lemurballing]

weretangle behind-the-scenes design progress

i love <3 rambling about my design choices and i actually have a bunch of weretangle concept sketches to share and go off about

i started pretty early on with the ‘sonic = nightmare wereform, tangle = titan wereform’ idea - picked titan because it was one of the few minions without stretchy abilities, and i thought it fit well for tangle’s design and to contrast how she usually is, and then i did up some initial sketches leading to this one:

i didn’t push her proportions very far with this one, mainly just the exaggerated forearms and a liittle bit of extra fur; not nearly werecreature enough i gave her tusks as an inversion of fangs, considering tangle’s wereform is sort of an inversion of sonic’s and this would be an easy way to contrast them to a viewer; i also added some pinkish markings as a way to introduce a third color, like werehog gets an extra fur color in white, and to echo dark gaia minions having their glowy spots. the shoes are mostly her regular shoes with randomly different lacing pattern, as well as glowy aggressively pink soles with spikes mimicking titan feet, sorta. they’re a different shape.

from here, i tried pushing a little more and got these:

and here i go more for the ‘towering werelemur not used to her size yet’ angle, as well as still using a spiral arm pattern - which i struggle to draw consistently in any of the sketches that use it lol

the bottom right sketch is the first i did on this page; the shoe design is about the same as the first concept with regular laces, but the whole body is pretty different, using a lot more bulk. i use a consistent ‘wavy/fiery’ sort of shape for fur tufts, going off the two tall firelike spike-things titans have, using it for her tail also - i gave this up after this sketch because it would be hard to translate into a shape you’re supposed to see in 3d from multiple angles, such as her tail or hair, while also retaining a consistent ‘fiery’ shape. some of the added fur i liked and kept, others (like the tufts right behind her head up from the body) i toned down, and some (like the shoulder spike tuft) i removed entirely. she also had a marking between her eyes - also meant to echo dark gaia minion glowy markings - which didn’t stick around past this sketch, since it looked too ‘intricate’ - it would stand out against werehog sonic and call into question why he doesn’t have any glowy bits, and my main idea going into this design was ‘a design that can appear besides werehog sonic and seem like it’s from official media’, otherwise i’d just redesign werehog sonic a bit

the little chibi werelemur tangle as size reference to werehog sonic is sort of its own design; a little more ‘boxy’ or less ‘flowy’ than the other, slightly shorter arms that don’t drag on the floor, regular-shaped fur tufts, and a different hairstyle to be extra fluffy-looking. it’s also hard to see with how light the sketch lines are, but she’s still got her chest fur, just larger. this one also goes back to the hands being white instead of greyed.

the third sketch (supposed to be tangle sheepishly trying to tiptoe, but getting caught) blends these two together a bit, using mostly the 2nd sketch’s proportions, but a bit of ‘fiery’ fur like the 1st, and back to 2 tusks like the first concept above. the shoe design is still pretty tame, because shoes are hard !! i also still didnt know how i wanted the laces

and from here i sort of knew the angle i wanted to take with tangle’s wereform, so i did sketches within a similar vein:

(bottom right, realizing she’s scary now; sketch above that, realizing someone saw her and is trying to seem less scary)

here i’ve narrowed down to a few traits that remain, while fine-tuning the rest: a fur ‘crest’ surrounding her head to act like the ‘jaw’ a titan has, and exaggerate her chest fur; her tail being thicker at the tip like a mace, but still having a normal fur tuft shape (& kinda looking like an artichoke lol); one tusk at each corner of her mouth instead of two; tufts of fur at either side of her head to resemble horns; and a settled bodytype/proportions, with little variation

since her tail doesn’t stretch, setting the length is important; it should be long enough to have range to use as a weapon, but not long enough to grapple/wrap also, the precise size of her head in relation to her body does a lot for conveying scale, and this varies between the different sketches here; i think i like where i landed with the final, so doing a bit of variation here was important to see how to get to what worked best. i also start messing with her arm pattern again, because i want it to be easy to recreate while drawing, and a spiral is not unless you can make clear rules and a pattern for it, or the limb is vague enough for it not to matter - for example, garurumon’s tail. you can also see i’ve given her lemurish hand pads, which isn’t a trait we’ve seen with sonic characters iirc but i have always maintained that tangle deserves it because it’s such a cool design choice AND helps give you an idea which way the hand is facing, and where the hand ends since you terminate it before the wrist! i think it wouldn’t be out of place, especially when werehog has more realistic hands and actual fingernails, when we never see sonic’s hands gloveless otherwise.

also, here’s the first sketch where i have clothes on her - because i can’t see a canonical weretangle design not using clothes, even if i consider them unnecessary for animal characters - and i still took it down to some makeshift shorts and extra chest fluff, because i’m not too fond of the ‘wearing ripped, pulled-chicken clothes’ look, or just putting oversized clothes on weretangle. and the first actually cool shoe concept!! which is basically the final shoe design i went with, just cooler-toned metal. i also really like the tall shoes look, because it gives a sense of being unwieldy or restricting movement - the general vibe to tangle being way larger and clunkier, which her shoes fit into, and also are further armored, so the shoes really fit better with the overall design than before

last note here, you can see the sketch with most color is messing around with an added tone between the light and dark, as sort of a ‘sooty’ effect or ‘gradient’ along the arms; i scrapped this shade because i’d already added an extra one with the darker grey for her palms and facial markings. (which is an interesting note, because this isn’t consistent in idw which greys are shared and which aren’t - at some points, her ears are the same darker grey as her eye markings; at others, her eye markings are noticeably darker than either other grey; and sometimes her ears are the same shade as her muzzle, and just the eye markings are darker. in my own art, since i draw her ears with lemur fur instead of bald, i generally color her ears the same as her grey fur markings)

aaand now back to the final design for comparison <3

most traits are inherited from the concepts, such as the horn hair, single tusks, etc. so i’ll talk more about what’s new for this iteration!

there’s a specific layout to her chest fur tufts, and it’s sort of a ‘double v’, but one ‘v’ is inside the other and only has 3 tufts. they also curl around her neck and leave the shoulders exposed, which makes it easier to position them against each other. her arms have an entirely new marking, which is different along the arm, further accentuating the shift in proportions compared to a spiral pattern. it’s also way easier to draw without seeming inaccurate :) the upper arm has , if you look at it creatively, a ‘jaw’ shape - and the darker marking on her chest could be interpreted as a ‘tongue’ sticking up, maybe? it’s also better at clearly conveying which way the arm is rotated

the forearm then has a jagged ring pattern, like tangle’s tail, which also gives it a bit more of a ‘dangerous’ feeling. at first when i was coloring the design, only her palms were darker and the whole hand was white, but then i tried the darker grey on the fingers… and immediately it terminated the hand shape so well, and let her claws stand out without introducing a new color or making them dark plus, if you squint, it makes the fingers look like just another stripe! which is my fav part :] and then last, the face, which was also spur-of-the-moment that turned out well; i’d already been using a darker color around her eyes than her muzzle, and then tried a little curl around her muzzle and her forehead marking and !! it looks like a scar or something?? sweet!!

this has been my design rambling :3 if you’ve gotten down here, thank you for reading <3

[eemamminy-art]

I was really sick last night so I'm taking it easy a little bit today before I try to get any work done, so I spent a few hours putting together Mal's farmhouse in the sims 4 :3

Lots of pics ahead so it's going under a read more! Also please excuse the quality, I have to play with low graphics because my computer is a potato that's like, 7 or 8 years old at this point. There's also a lot of rambling about stuff with my character and my fic in here if that's of interest to anyone too :3

Okay... Well first of all, Them!!

Mal looking like a little trucker in that cap and vest combo lmao but it's so cute :3 I think it suits his weird 20-something year old grandpa aesthetic!! I use mostly vanilla cosmetics so Mal's hair is a bit longer than it should be and Alex's hair is a bit shorter than how I draw it but I tried to keep them mostly accurate! I think Mal looks better in terms of design just because I've made him in the sims before and had years to tweak him to how he looks here lol

Now the farmhouse...! I tried to get the layout of the house looking like I imagine it, so it'll give you a good idea of how it's supposed to be laid out in my fic :3 how I describe it to be anyway! The outside is not at all accurate besides the placement of the crops and chicken coop. Beside the house should be a river (it's the meadowlands farm in stardew and I moved the cabin to be right beside the river where the chicken coop is initially when you start!) and further down past the chicken coop and crops should be a whooole bunch of fruit trees. I envision the farm as like, having an orchard of different fruit trees as the main crop for the farm's actual income, while the chickens and other crops are more for like, self-sustaining the family. Idk if that comes across in what I'm writing but I'm kind of trying to have Mal stumble his way through learning to farm rather than having an inherent idea of what to do or detailed written instructions left by grandpa lol

The kitchen and living area are one big space :3 idk why the door to the basement turned invisible, just sims being sims I guess. But imagine a door there behind the dining table and not just an open gap in the wall lmao

The living room wall is a different color than how I've drawn it so mission failed on that one lol but it's fine! It should be a record player instead of a jukebox and there should be a landline phone on an end table near the door, but sims 4 only has so much stuff in the vanilla. RIP to my landline phones from previous sims games, I think I miss that the most 😩 nothing quite makes me as nostalgic for childhood as a landline phone in the home. Anyway!

Beside the kitchen is a hallway which leads to the bathroom and to Mal's childhood bedroom which he no longer uses. The hallway is kinda cramped but I like that, it gives a vibe of those kind of houses that have little space and try to use it all to the fullest :3 I didn't notice the bathroom floor was wet before taking the bathroom pics, you can thank Alex for that. He had just jogged and showered and I guess left a puddle 😂 messy boy!!

And Mal's childhood room is very small but just has some cutesy stuff in it. The little bed and little wooden chest are some things that kinda come up in a few chapters I wrote so I was like 👀 those are essential

The master bedroom, which was Mal's grandparents' room but he's since moved into it. I think I also describe it as having a dresser in addition to the closet so that's missing... And there should be family photos but I don't think I have anything like that with my currently installed packs. The guitar was grandpa's, but I don't think Mal knows how to play? I had some idea a few months back about Sam teaching him guitar but I'm not sure now. Feels a little too intimate for the dynamic he and Sam have/will have! Besides that, Mal's love of music has manifested in dancing and singing so I think that's a fair trade :3 but he keeps the guitar anyway for sentimental reasons! And the green bedding, as made by Emily... but you know in my head I imagine her making a huge quilt for him, so pretend like there's a big quilt on the bed too lol

Last is the basement which looks nothing like it should lol. I forgot to reinstall the laundry pack so I'm missing that... but I imagine it as having the water heater, washing machine, some wine racks, and a woodworking table. Maaaybe casks or kegs like you can have in stardew? I need to think on it :3 But it would be this shape of room at least, just a small square room under the kitchen.

And then... I played a little and I kept getting stuff that felt so true to them lol

Vigorously nodding, yeah 😄

(small nsfw mention in the following paragraph fyi)

And then some spicy ones which made me laugh because this is also accurate to how they are. They were literally just talking btw not doing any romantic interactions 😂 Mal made some bad jokes and Alex was like oughhh I can't not fuck him 😫 I haven't started posting all the horny turmoil chapters yet but you'll see eventually, he's a little bit pathetic about it lol it's cute

And of course, it wouldn't be the sims without it doing some weird buggy shit (especially sims 4 lately... these QOL patches have added some weird quirks to how townies autonomously interact with your sims lol)

Wherein grandpa died and then immediately called, as a ghost, to ask if Mal wanted his company for sympathy... Hrmmm....... 🤔 Maybe it knew that grandpa's ghost shows up from time to time in stardew valley too lol

The end 🥰 Hope you enjoyed reading...! I'm gonna play with them more another time and if anything fun happens I'll be sure to share!!

[lemonsrosesandlavender]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Spread the self-love 💕

Ahhhhh thank you! Oh this is SO hard to choose ❤️

Planar Tears (Rolan x OFC Isekai). E Rated/WIP/53,718 words This is by far the most challenging thing I’ve ever written; planning and pacing all the plot threads, developing an OC with a complex backstory and messy feelings that we don’t see through her own POV, keeping the story moving and avoiding repetition (how successfully? I'll leave that judgement to my readers lol). Basically, the challenges of writing a long fic for which the bulk of plot points are not closely tied to canon. (Sharp Teeth was like training wheels in this respect: shorter story, followed the “stations of canon” pretty closely, an OC who I love very much but who is a lot more straightforward than Catrin). Because of how challenging it’s been, I am immensely proud of the result. I love the tension, and I’m so excited to get to this story's version of certain canon events... especially Moonrise and Baldur's Gate 👀 Ok, that's enough rambling about my beloved story!

Sharp Teeth (Rolan x f!Tav). E Rated/Complete/41,315 words This is just a rollicking good time that seized me by the neck and didn't let go until it was done. I hadn't really written any fic in ages, and then BANG Rolan was there and suddenly I dropped all my other hobbies for him and Sharp Teeth lol. Canon! But with Rolan-fucking! And feelings! Let's go!

Après Théâtre (Guillermo x Nandor). T Rated/Complete/17,749 words THE FIC I STARTED WITH. It's a second-season continuation for WWDITS, and I had such a blast writing it. I read through it recently and made myself laugh, though now it seems quite short to me (for its chapter length)! The greatest compliment was someone commenting that they assumed my OC banshee Áine was a character from Wellington Paranormal. That fed me for AGES.

Ribbons (Yvette x Ludovico, Ambition: A Minuet in Power). T Rated/Complete/8,447 words I am the proud inaugurator of the Ambition fandom tag, and the author of 4 of its 9 works! I fell in love with this little indie game about being a hot Frenchwoman in revolutionary Paris. And I fell super in love with the sweet, corruptible priest Ludovico, who is extremely easily flustered and thus catnip to me. This was just a cute addition, filling in their love story beyond his romance route in the game <3 And, now I think about it... I'm reusing hair ribbon symbolism again in Planar Tears lol. There's just something so intimate about them, come at me. (Ludovico drove me to write smut for the first time too! An adorable priest forever in my heart).

Combat Training (Rolan x f!Tav). E Rated/Complete/7,572 words God it KILLED me picking just one Rolan smut fic for this. I'm so happy with all of them. But I really like this one for depicting the love in their post-game relationship, even as they work through conflict. AND HAVING REALLY HOT SEX. That's important <3 If you do click on this one, mind the tags; Tav sticks her entire hand up Rolan's ass (and he loves it, of course).

[charbon-et-feu]

I got this ask on my art blog within minutes of posting that Hoenn boys bunny art so I'm pretty sure that's what prompted it. I don't want to clutter my art blog with this nonsense, so I'm not going to answer it there, but I do want to dissect it a little bit.

"You're not even trying to age him up or anything"

It's fascinating (and sometimes a little concerning) to get a glimpse of what people's standards are for what makes a fictional character look like an adult. I can usually see where people are coming from when they assume that a character is young based on their appearance, but it's annoying when people confidently say that a character must be a child if they're drawn a certain way, and then go on to assume the worst of an artist if they draw something a little spicy. It's already difficult to guess most people's ages irl, so it's silly to think you can reliably guess the age of a fictional character drawn in an anime/cartoon style.

People come in all shapes and sizes. People from some East Asian countries tend to be shorter and younger looking, and then you have people from Scandinavian countries who are typically super tall. Idk where anon is from, but a lot of the people who like to fuss over the ages of fictional characters are from the US. This is crazy to me because the US is such a diverse melting pot, so you would think that someone living here would understand that there's no one-size-fits-all definition for what an adult looks like.

And none of this even really matters when you're talking about fictional characters. They're not real. They're objects, dolls that we play dress up with and smush together and use to tell stories. We throw them on a stage to entertain us. Sometimes, it's heartwarming or funny or sad, and, sometimes, it makes us uncomfortable. Oftentimes, we put them through hell, but no matter what, they can't hurt us, and we can't hurt them. So, it's a safe way to explore our ideas and try to understand ourselves and our world a little better.

It's so strange when people judge someone based only on what they enjoy in fiction and art. It really doesn't matter how I draw Brendan or any other character, so I'm just gonna keep doing what I'm doing. But I do want to try to dig into why anon thinks that I'm not aging up Brendan at all, because I think it's interesting to analyze and try to understand the thought process behind comments like these. Feel free to take this next bit of rambling with a grain of salt. I'm mostly just speculating based off anon's ask and similar arguments that I've observed from people who try to argue that a character looks too young to be an adult.

For reference, here's the art that (most likely) prompted the ask:

When I draw Brendan, I'm usually going for older teen/young adult. I did make him a little skinnier than I would have liked here, but he still looks like he could be anywhere from a teen to a baby-faced adult. So why does anon see a child?

I'm guessing one of the main reasons is that Brendan is short. And since Wallace is super tall, it makes Brendan look even smaller. Most of the characters don't have canon heights, but I've seen people estimate Wallace's height at a little over 6'(183cm) by comparing character models in Pokemon Masters, and Steven is a few inches shorter than Wallace. I go with 6'2"(188cm) for Wallace and 5'11"(180cm) for Steven. I think most of the protags are under 5'(152cm), but I make Brendan at least 5'5"(165cm). Even with the extra inches, Wallace still makes him look small lol. Here's a little chart I made for myself a while ago so you can see what I mean.

Could I make Brendan taller? I guess I could, but I'm not going to. The height difference is part of the appeal for me. It's fun to draw, and with certain poses, it can be an interesting challenge. Also, short men exist, and they're valid.

I'm guessing the other reason anon sees Brendan as a child is because I drew him pretty cutesy and baby-faced compared to Steven and Wallace. In the bunny pic, Brendan's bashful expression and somewhat feminine pose and outfit also add to the cuteness. I like to keep the somewhat big, rounded eyes from his canon design, but I do the same thing when I draw Akari/Dawn, and I haven't gotten any angry asks about my volokari art. I just like to draw Brendan cute. Is that the problem? Can someone not be perceived as a man if they give off too much cute, feminine energy? Hmm... That kinda smells like toxic masculinity.

I can't help but wonder if anon is letting common stereotypes rooted in traditional patriarchal USAmerican gender norms poison their perception of what a man should look like. "Real" men must be tall, strong, rugged, etc, and if they don't meet those strict standards then they must be either a boy or a woman. (Similarly, women must be short, dainty, soft, have big boobs, etc, but this is about Brendan so we won't get into that.) If you transfer this mindset to stylized art of fictional characters, I can see how anon arrived at their conclusion. But this way of thinking is close-minded and objectively wrong because the average, white USAmerican's view of the world is not universal. What about short, feminine men? Flat chested women? Trans men? Are we not allowed to draw and sexualize these types of characters? Kinda sucks for all the short kings and petite women out there who want to see a character that looks like them get railed by their favorite blorbo of the month. Sorry guys, you must be this tall if you want a fictional character with your body type to be sexualized. No fun allowed.

Maybe I'm wrong and it's not that deep, but this is how ridiculous people sound when they start breaking out the rulers and measuring the art of fictional characters to determine if it fits into their (often inconsistent) standards of what an adult looks like. Now, I do understand that certain types of art can make people uncomfortable, and that's perfectly valid. I also have a certain threshold for when a character starts to look a little too young and I'm no longer comfortable seeing them depicted in certain ways. When I come across art like that, I just unfollow/block/mute and move on. It's not that serious and definitely not a good reason to jump into some random person's inbox to harass them.

Also, I don't want to get into this topic too much (since this is already really long) but I think it's worth noting that these types of comments usually only start popping up when the art has sexual elements to it. Young Shounen Anime protagonists experience varying degrees of violence regularly, but I can't remember the last time I saw someone question the morals of those creators. Why does the pearl clutching only happen when creators try to dive into sexual territory with fictional characters? Just something I wish these people would take the time to think about.

Anyway, anon can think I'm weird if they want, but I think the assumptions they're making say a lot more about them than they do about me. I'm just here to have fun and draw cute anime boys, and Brendan just happens to be my favorite doll rn. I enjoy playing dress up with him, and sometimes that means he's gotta get in the bunny outfit. It's fine. He's having fun. He told me himself.

I didn't mean to ramble this much, and I don't usually like engaging with discourse, but I had some thoughts, and I wanted to get some of them out. I love art. I think creators should be free to make whatever beautiful, weird art they want, so I think it's important to push back against this behavior when we can. But if I get more asks like this, I promise I won't respond to them often.

If you made it to the end, thanks for taking the time to read all that. I don't usually talk much, so when I do, it's nice when people listen. As a reward for your efforts, please accept this unfinished Steven art.

[forestfullofberries]

please do tell me your thoughts on the EPIC trio (Eury, Ody, and Polites) ramble all about them i love hearing others thoughts on them (and i might snatch a few HC for myself in the process lol) i could talk about them forever honestly

bestie (no idea who you are) what do you think i've been doing on this blog for the past tree weeks

anyway. odysseus used to be my favorite character (now the spot is taken by eurylochus (i don't love ody any less now, i just love eurylochus more)), i am always drawn to characters who go through absolute hell while having enough drive to persevere, because they have something worth surviving for.

polites... i feel like i don't know enough about him. how did he manage to bring all of that optimism through 10 years of war? or did he develop it during/after the war as a way to cope? how much of it is a front he puts up for the sake of others? does he have anybody waiting for him at home? what flaws, shortcomings does he have? is he naive or is he wise? is he both? i just don't know, there was so little time to get to know him.

now, eurylochus. i didn't think much of him at the start, just like probably a lot of us, but then i started warming up to him, even before thunder saga put him in such a spotlight. there's just something about him being the one who cares for the crew. the voice of the crew. i like the sound of it.

before thunder saga came out i had this vision for the underworld animatic, i wanted to use chorus time to show eurylochus going around the ship trying to keep the crew from total despair, comforting those who are crying, trying to ground those who are having the worst visions. but now i don't think he'd be in the condition to do that, with his own baggage of opening the bag and seeing everyone who died because of it? yeeeaah, he's the one who needed comfort during that underworld trip.

also, i was adamant that he didn't open the bag. i was just so sure it would be out of character for him! cautious pessimistic eurylochus? messing with a dangerous magic object? why on earth would he do that!! (i still don't completely understand why he did that tbh, but i guess the growing mistrust from luck runs out played a role there)

and of course, thunder saga has me obsessed with the guy. it's the tragedy of it all. the one thing he found purpose in - protecting the crew - and they're all dead now. don't even get me started on him having his own Just a Man moment. devastating. so of course i play mutiny on repeat.

headcanons? eury aro. (disclaimer, i know very little of his mythological background outside of the odyssey, and frankly do not care) i think he and ctimene are in an aromantic version of lavender marriage. they're good friends, and they make the home life work, and they care for each other a whole lot, but also they both know they'd be fine on their own. ctimene has a good relationship with eurylochus' side of the family, and he knows they will take care of her in times of need.

that's why returning home as soon as possible is not that high on his priority list, especially when it comes to preserving lives. he knows that every single man in their army has someone waiting for them at home, and each life lost means many broken hearts. so yeah, he's not very keen on taking risks.

as opposed to odysseus, who knows he's on a ticking clock. the prophecy was vague, but it's enough to put together the situation: empty throne, widowed queen, only heir too young to do anything. of course he's in a rush.

my other headcanon is that as a kid, eurylochus had his growth spurt relatively late, and for most of their childhood he was shorter and scrawnier than both odysseus and polites :D

[janeyshivers]

What if 'Gundam SEED' was told from Flay's point of view? How would they approach it? Would it have been better?

i would fucking KILL for a SEED show which focused on Flay are you kidding me. if SEED was being written by the kind of people who understand that she is in fact one of the most interesting characters they have i think they could have cooked something really cool, even if the rest of the shitty worldbuilding with all its baked-in issues was left intact.

if you take everything that in the original show is basically used to convey "Flay is a horrible two-timing yandere bitch" and treated it seriously with a Flay POV story, for the first half of SEED you'd have a really tragic character narrative about a girl whose grief essentially eats her alive, pushing her to worse and worse depths of moral depravity as she tries to assuage both that grief and the escalating guilt as she keeps making terrible decisions that hurt her and the people around her. like Shinn, she's a character who feels like she walked onto the wrong set on her way to a more grounded and tragic Tomino Gundam show (for better and worse, since the misogynistic elements could absolutely fit there too lol (and like Shinn, Fukuda doesn't know what to do with her and completely fucks it)).

that being said, i don't think you'd actually get much out of just retelling the original story with a greater focus on Flay's perspective, because in the back half of the show she's essentially shoved into a closet before she gets fridged in the finale. her character just sort of loses its momentum, with all the pathos fading into the background before Kira can have his big manly sook over her dying, and there's only so much you can do with such meagre material.

i think the approach for a Flay-centric story is shorter, and is laser-focused on this young woman's unravelling life with the mecha pilot characters acting in a more secondary role, almost like Lelouch for a lot of the early parts of Code Geass. and then you could have the dealer's choice of whether to take it in a bittersweet and tragic direction, or maybe towards something more sunny and happy. tbh my ideal version of this is just a remix of Flay's concept in a different AU free from SEED's plot-and-world baggage, which is not totally inconceivable, since Flay is already a remix of Quess' concept wrapped in Fraw Bow's basic look. would i be really interested in watching that show? yes. do i think Sunrise would greenlight such a show in a million years? good fucking lord no.

anyway this was a long and rambling answer so to answer directly - if it was told from Flay's view that would be much more interesting than what we actually got and there's plenty of character potential there, but the approach would need to involve setting fire to a lot of the rest of SEED because its foundationally shit. it would absolutely have been better if for no other reason than Kira would have less screentime.

anyway ty for sending in the ask!! this was really interesting to think about :3