#this my fav click actually fuck anything else

[1overbaby]

Admit you already are.

If you are trying to become someone, because you understand that means you will be the person who has your desire, then guess what. You already are admitting you are the one who has their desire. Think about it. To try to get, means you secretly, implicitly know that you are capable of being the person who has it. Otherwise, why put in the hard work and the effort to try and attain it? If you truly did not think you were capable of being that person, you simply would not even try. You know you can become it. Let’s accept this first.

Let’s take this a step further. That means you already are it. You already are that person. You’re making the mistake of trying to become it instead of realising you already ARE it. It is about self realisation. It is simply that easy! You realise you already are that person - that is how you change self. You gently accept you already are it.

Example: I understand, with loa, that I can be with sp. I accept that and try to become the person who has that sp. This hard work and effort indicates to me that I know I can become that person, I have the potential within me to become irresistible, loved, chosen, valued. That’s why I am trying, no? Otherwise if I truly believed i cannot be chosen or valued, why would i even try?

INSTEAD -> i understand, with loa, that i already have sp, because creation is finished. If i already have sp, that means i already am the person who is irresistible, loved, chosen and valued. All i must do is realise that and accept that i am. That is all you have to do. And continue living, with that acceptance (being).

Example: i understand, perhaps not even with loa, but in general, that i can go to my dream university. I try and work hard to become the person that the university would accept.

INSTEAD -> why not just skip the trying? If i know that with hard work i can become the intelligent, chosen student - then i must accept that i already know that i am that person. I just haven’t embodied them yet. If i know i can be chosen and intelligent and smart, it means i have critical thinking skills, i work smart, i am good at writing essays, all the stuff, already! I just need to realise this, and tap into that.

Having it indicates who you are. You do not become to have.

Say my mother walks into my room right now and says she bought me a new iPhone, and it’s waiting for me downstairs (i now have an iPhone). At first instinct, what do i do? I accept i have a new iPhone. Then, questions may arise such as: why? Since when? How? What for?

All of these questions, i first answer internally (without realising, sometimes) and the answers depend on my self concept. ‘Oh, because i am cherished and my mother loves spoiling me! Awh it doesn’t matter when, i am grateful she went out of her way to surprise me. I am so loved and spoiled, that’s what for!’ Something along the lines of that in whatever way you think. I don’t literally say these in my head. Not all the time at least. Sometimes i just feel that about myself.

The how, when and why does not matter since i already now have this iPhone. I just quickly feel whatever i feel about those questions, and then in imagination enjoy the feeling of having an iPhone. I may begin to imagine using it, what my friends will say about it, what lockscreen I’m gonna use, how fancy I’d feel with it! I’m already onto the next, while feeling gratitude for my mother for gifting me it.

How to apply this in daily life? -> gentle acceptance.

If i say to myself that i have my sp. It means i already have it. Say my sp walks into the room right now and says ‘I love you. Dinner tonight at 8?’ At first instance I’d just accept that i have my sp in love with me, and i am going on a date with him, because he wants to be with me! Then, questions may arise. And I’d feel the answers within based on my self concept. ‘If I’ve been asked on a date, and i am with my sp now, then it simply must mean i am irresistible! I am wanted, valued and chosen.’ I do not fight them, do i? Because it has happened - sp is mine. It would be silly to contradict myself. Instead, i gently accept these about me.

NOW. The example of my mother walking into the room, and my sp asking me out: YOU DO THIS IN THE 4D! This is what going to the end mean, and accepting you have your end, IN THE 4D. Then, accept that this already means you must be loved, chosen and valued ALREADY. IT ALREADY IS SO. I do not first BECOME loved to be asked out or spoiled. I simple AM loved and spoiled already within, which is why i have these things! Once i accept it already has HAPPENED - I live enjoying it with gratitude.

GO TO THE END, IF U HAVE A DESIRE - THAT MEANS YOU ALREADY HAVE IT. AND IF YOU ALREADY HAVE IT, GENTLY ACCEPT THAT YOU ALREADY ARE THE PERSON WHO HAS IT. YOU ALREADY ARE.

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Charlie: “Whhhew...! That was-”

Vaggie: “A lot?”

Charlie: “-better than expected!”

Vaggie: “No kidding. If I’d known inviting your dad here would get Alastor looking like a wet cat, I’d’ve pushed for it sooner.”

Charlie: “I’m just glad you pushed when you did.” (smooch) “Thank you. I’ve missed him.”

Vaggie: “Looks like he’s really missed you too, babe.”

Charlie: “Mm. Not enough to call, though.”

Vaggie: “Ehh, calling can be scary. Good thing you’re plenty brave.”

Charlie: “Only when you’re holding my hand!”

Vaggie: “Husk would say that’s an act of fucking bravery all on it’s own, letting yourself get grabbed by the small, mean, grumpy lady. Remind me not to help him out at the bar again ever. I think there’s vodka in my hair.”

Charlie: “I’ll try, but you know you’re gonna help anyway.” (second smooch) “Can I get a ‘you’re welcome’?”

Vaggie: (chuckling) “Charlie, I didn’t do anything.”

Charlie: “You do lots.”

Vaggie: “And thank hell Angel Dust isn’t around to hear that…”

Charlie: “I’m serious! You got me to call dad in the first place!”

Vaggie: “I just suggested it, you’re the one who did it, and you two worked things out together like a real father-daughter team.”

Charlie: “And we’re a great team too.”

Vaggie: “Well I’m definitely a pretty big fan of us. Although…. Sir Pentious and Keekee are giving us a run for our money. And the Niffty plus a lock of Lucifer’s hair combo might just have us beat.”

Charlie: “Blegh! She actually got that in the end? I thought her scissors couldn’t even cut it!”

Vaggie: “They didn’t. She used my spear.”

Charlie: “She WHAT-”

Vaggie: “And asked your dad very nicely to please take off his hat so she could trim off a piece without ruining the rest of his hair.”

Charlie: (sigh) “I guess as long as she ASKED…”

Vaggie: “D’you think her whole room is just a shrine to quote unquote bad boys?”

Charlie: “Oh don’t say that. We need to introduce her to some boybands or something.”

Vaggie: “We?”

Charlie: “Yes ‘we’, little miss likes making lesbian covers of the songs normally sung by teenage boys while you’re in the shower and think the sound of running water can in any way drown out your beautiful, heart stopping voice-”

Vaggie: “I- you- You’ve been listening!?”

Charlie: “Eeeev-er-y morning yep! Heheh~”

Vaggie: “Diablo mio… I need a drink.”

Charlie: (giggling) “To go with the vodka hair?” (nibbles Vaggie’s fringe) “Nom nom nom. Delicious~”

Vaggie: “Scratch that- clearly WE need some SLEEP.”

Charlie: “How can I sleep at all tonight, though? Vaggie- we’re gonna get a meeting with the top angels of creation! We’re gonna be on cloud nine! Literally! In HEAVEN!!”

Vaggie: “And sleep won’t be enough to prepare me for that but you definitely need it.”

Charlie: “It’s impossible! I need to SING!!!!!”

Vaggie: “You need to go shuck off those shoes and get in your ruby slippers while I put in your fav movie so we can get some rest.”

Charlie: “If you put in the Wizard of Oz you know I’m 100% gonna sing anyway right.”

Vaggie: “Yeah, but you’ll be singing in bed so you can keep watching the movie, and that’s good enough for me.”

Charlie: “I love youuuu~”

Vaggie: “Love you too sweetie. Slippers. Bed. Z’s. Now.”

Charlie: (kicks off shoes) “Ta da! There’s no place like home!"

Charlie: (clicks hooves together)

Charlie: "Heheheheh...!”

Vaggie: “I meant on the bed in your pajamas and under the actual covers- vaya, whatever. Scoot. Don’t go running off to Oz without me.”

Charlie: (snuggling vaggie in a hug instead) “I’m never going anywhere without you, Vaggie. Including heaven.”

Vaggie: (awkward laugh) “Great…”

Charlie: “Wanna know whyyyy?”

Vaggie: (smiles) “I make a great hand-holder, apparently.”

Charlie: “Yes. And, you’re home.”

Vaggie: “….yeah? I’m here? This is our room?”

Charlie: (snorting) “Vaggie-”

Vaggie: “In our hotel??”

Charlie: “Vaggie nooo- Anywhere else would be home too, with you there.”

Vaggie: “…..”

Vaggie: (deep breath)

Vaggie: “…... Charlie-”

Charlie: “You gonna press play?”

Vaggie: “-huh? Oh. Yeah.”

Charlie: (snuggling her) “This has been an amazing day. Wish every day could be like this, forever.”

Vaggie: “Yeah.” (hoarse) (curling up as close to charlie as she can) "Me too.”

-101 minutes of Oz later-

Vaggie: "Charlie?"

Charlie: "... nnnoooo..."

Vaggie: "Charlie, c'mon, at least let's get your coat off."

Charlie: "Mmrrr... mi mi mi..."

Vaggie: "You can go 'snork mi mi mi' afterwards. Work with me here, Dorothy- I can't get you settled into Oz without help."

Charlie: "Hmmheheheh... so im Dorothy..?"

Vaggie: "Definitely. You've got the ruby slippers on and everything."

Charlie: "I love that you call my hooves that~ Thats so silly. You're so silly, Vaggie."

Vaggie: "And you're already half asleep. Suspenders next, okay?"

Charlie: "Remove the suspenders... delete the suspenders..."

Vaggie: "Get your horns tangled in the suspenders somehow, wait, hold on-"

Charlie: "SUSPEND the SUSPEDERS!"

Vaggie: "Alright, good enough. That's all the annoying stuff gone anyway. You should be good like that, right?"

Charlie: "Sleeeeeepy. Snuggles?"

Vaggie: "Snuggles right after I change, give me one sec okay."

Charlie: "Mmm."

Charlie: "...vaggie."

Vaggie: "That was half a second."

Charlie: "Vaggiiiiie."

Vaggie: "I'm right over here, stop making grabby hands."

Charlie: "Vaggggiiiiiiiee...!"

Vaggie: (huffs) "Fine, fine..." (snuggles) "Not like my nightie would cover much anyway. But if we end up having to get up in the middle of the night for something exploding again, you're going out first, and I'm stealing your jacket."

Charlie: "You look good in my clothes."

Vaggie: "I look like a ten year old. The sleeves have to be rolled back to the elbow just so I have hands."

Charlie: "I like your hands..."

Vaggie: "Thanks." (kiss) "Go to sleep, Charlie."

Charlie: "Wait- heheheh- wait, Vaggie-"

Vaggie: "What?"

Charlie: "Vaggie, Vaggieeee~!"

Vaggie: "Giggling into my boobs isn't helping me understand what you're saying, babe."

Charlie: "Vaggie. If I'm Dorothy, and youuuu are GAY, then.."

Vaggie: "Little scared to see where this is going, not gonna lie."

Charlie: "Does that make-" (snickers) "Does that make you a girlfriend of Dorothy's?"

Vaggie: "............."

Charlie: "Vaggie~?"

Vaggie: "...Charlie. Please."

Vaggie: "Go the fuck to sleep."

Charlie: "HEH!"

[darlingmbappe]

The Loneliest [3] | Kylian Mbappé x Fem Reader

[Part One] [Part Two] [Part Three] [Part Four] [Epilogue]

Summary: While Kylian lets jealousy get the best of him on the pitch, you find that a tequila-filled night might be the answer to healing your broken heart... even if it's just for one night.

Warnings: Still just absolute angst. Missing your ex, Kylian being overprotective and jealous, Erling Haaland being a dick (i'm sorry it's purely for plot purposes), heavy drinking, self destructive behavior, cussing, bad cheese puns, let me know if I missed anything! — English is not my first language —

The breakup was bound to go public sooner or later. It was surprising you made it almost seven weeks before the media got the hold of the story. You both were spotted alone on separate sides of town too many times, you’d missed all of his matches, and E!News got a source that told them you live alone now. You have a strong hunch it’s your next door neighbor that’s always lingering by the stairs. She asks entirely too many questions.

While you were still with Kylian, your relationship was kept mostly private and you rarely found yourself in any headlines. But, lord knows, if there’s anything the press loves more than a celebrity engagement is a celebrity breakup. When you saw a graphic of your face and Kylians face photoshopped onto a broken heart on Snapchat, a clickbait title asking, “did our fav football couple call it quits?”, you knew you’d be getting some unwanted attention. Fuck you, Daily Mail. Mind your business.

You clearly remember agreeing with him to wait for you to text first, but he’s a damn liar. He didn’t let a day go by before sending you a sweet good morning text. For the past three weeks, he’s been sending little messages here and there. Nothing too risqué or anything that made you feel pressure… they were actually nice. You’d been pretty good at not responding, being occupied doing absolutely anything else to stop yourself from thinking about him.

Kylian knew this. Being with you for such a long time, he understood how you got when you didn’t want to think about something. When your family dog passed, you claimed you were fine over and over again, and he just had to let you hyper fixate on new random hobbies until your feelings eventually exploded out. You taught yourself claymation, knitting, refurbishing old creepy dolls… that was definitely his least favorite. He needed to make sure you didn’t force yourself to forget about him, he wanted to be there for you when you were ready. He’s patience is usually very thin, but he’s impressed with himself for staying (mostly) zen about you not responding. He had to. He couldn’t fuck this up again and come swinging with the ‘I love you’s that he types out and erases promptly.

It’s finally Friday and you just finished a late lunch at your favorite café near your office, just listening to music on your headphones and reading through a document you were about to send to your colleagues. Your phone buzzed with a message from Kylian and, of course, you clicked the notification. You always did.

He’d sent you a picture of a decorative board at some market with a cheese-remix of the song Sweet Dreams by the Eurythmics. You immediately laughed out loud, having seen this exact sign before with Kylian years ago. For weeks after, you two sang the lyrics randomly around the house, in the car, pretty much anywhere until all of your friends were begging for you two to just shut the fuck up.

Sweet dreams are made of cheese, who am I to dissa-brie, I’ve travelled the world and the feta cheese, everybody’s lookin’ for stilton.

Your fingers began to respond before you even had a chance to really think about it.

(Y/N): Not this shit again

Kylian smiled widely upon seeing that you sent something back, typing back in record speeds.

Kylian: I think it’s…….. grate

You actually smiled at his horrible pun, twirling your hair against your own will.

(Y/N): very cheesy

Kylian was so quick to look up more cheese puns, not wanting to let his roll come to an end. Any communication, even about cheese, worked for him.

Kylian: it’s very gouda to hear from you again :)

“Oh, man.” You mumbled to yourself, noticing how your heart rate increased with just a couple of his really really bad jokes.

God, you missed him so much.

You stood up, leaving the conversation there, gathering your things and turning up the music. Yet, the whole walk back it was impossible to focus on whatever was playing in your ears because of the louder song playing inside your head. Sweet dreams are made of cheese…

Kylians thumb was lodged between his teeth in anticipation, but soon realized you weren’t going to respond again. Lowly cursing to himself, he threw his phone back in his locker. Everyone was prepared for todays game against Manchester City, especially Kylian. He wanted to win so bad, it almost felt like the World Cup.

He knew who he was going to play against — Erling Haaland. If he wasn’t too fond of him before, finding out he hit on you on you brewed a different kind of determination to win inside of him. You said nothing happened that night and he believed you — but he knew that Haaland had more in mind than just a nice conversation. He noticed last week that he followed you on instagram and liked all of your recent pictures, not including the ones with him. As of last night, you still didn't follow him back. Those late night stalking sessions have to stop soon. His nutritionists is really getting on his ass for finishing entire jars of peanut butter every other day.

He wondered if you were going to watch the game or if you had been since you left. He really hoped you hadn’t been. He’s been playing horribly these past weeks. Once the news of your breakup went public, every commentator made a point of mentioning it and saying stupid shit like, “life goes on, and that’s something Kylian Mbappé is going to have to figure out sooner or later.”

He let his angry thoughts fuel him as he walked into the tunnel. He tried to get his head in the game, but couldn’t help looking back every so often to the opposing team next to them, eyes always landing on the tall blonde man.

He stood in his place, but his neck twisted back against his will, not really caring if he was being too obvious. Right before the teams were meant to walk out together, Haaland caught his death glares. Kylian doubled down, making sure he wouldn’t be the one to lose this immature staring contest. Holland cracked a shit-eating grin and winked at Mbappé.

Oh, the rage… keep it in, Kylian.

He looked away with an unbothered “pft.” It wasn’t very convincing, not even to himself.

After the usual opening ceremony, the whistle blew indicating that the match had begun, sending Kylian sprinting in every direction as the game progressed. ManCity was good, but he knew PSG was better. He kept telling himself this, but his teammates continued to mess up, even allowing the light-blue motherfuckers to score the opening goal not even twenty minutes into the first half. And, of course, it was Haaland that buried the ball deep in the back of the net. He watched him celebrate on his pitch, listening to the crowd cheer their chant, feeling tortured and helpless.

His eye was fixed on the Norwegian as he moved back into the starting position, hating that he was laughing, still on a high from scoring. Hakimi walked next to Kylian, feeling that his friend is on the brink of doing something very dumb. His hand patted his shoulder, but Kylian didn’t even notice it, his entire body twitching with jealously.

When Kylian was in earshot, Haaland nodded up at him. “Kylian.” The young player called, but Kylian just side eyed him. Hakimi grabbed his shoulders tighter just in case he tried anything. “(Y/N) is up for grabs now, no?”

Kylians ears rung as he felt himself launch at Erling who just laughed. Hakimi had gotten in front of him without missing a beat, roughly shoving him in the opposite direction to keep him from beating up the 22 year old. Other PSG players joined, guiding Kylian to his position.

He didn’t even know words were coming out of his mouth at this point, pointing his finger threateningly at Erling. “Don’t fucking talk about her. I’ll fucking kill you. You hear me?” He was well aware that this was all to get in his head but, shit. It’s working. Kylian didn’t even notice that the referee was being talked down by Neymar and Messi, eventually the confrontation getting waved off with a warning at the start of a new play.

Halftime rolled around and no one scored again. In the locker room, Glatier yelled and waved his arms, demanding that the defense get their shit together. He zoned out, too deep in thought about what an asshole that guy is and how he wants to score and rub it in his face. He was brought back when he heard his name grumbling out of his coaches mouth, having no idea what the topic even was.

“Sorry?” He embarrassingly piped up, seeing all of his teammates had their eyes on him.

Glatier grunted, stomping closer to him. “I said, get your shit together!”

“Yes, coach.”

“Don’t worry about what they say. Just go out there and play like I know you can. You want to win, don’t you?”

“I do, coach.”

“Then let’s fucking win.”

Glatier was right and he knew it. Whatever that stupid hulk-boy had to say about you was only getting under his skin. He couldn’t play at his best like that.

So, when the second half started and he heard him say some bullshit again, he did his best to let it roll off his back. “You think she’ll respond if I DM her?” Erling asked nonchalantly to Álvarez, but Kylian was determined to let it slide. Let it fucking slide.

But, he didn’t stop there. When walking by him, Haaland asked him, “What’s a good spot to take her? Nothing too far, my hotel room is around here.” Kylians fists were balled in rage, biting his cheek and blowing air out of his flared nostrils.

“You better shut your goddamn mouth.” He snapped back, but continued walking away, knowing he can’t let him win. Hearing Haalands taunting chuckles behind him almost made him whip back around, but Neymar wrapped his arm securely around his shoulder, forcing him to look forward.

“It’s just talk, Kylian. Come on.” He rubbed his head roughly as if to beg him to not let it get to him before running back into position.

The game progressed, only ten minutes left of the second half before overtime. Neymar was at the left side of the field, preparing himself for a corner kick. Kylian searched for an opening that could potentially bring a scoring opportunity, but a brooding shadow seemed to follow him everywhere. Haaland was aggressively playing defense against him, his height advantage making it impossible for Kylian to move somewhere better.

“I hope she wears something nice and tight.” Erling chortled through his tired breathing. “I’ve been waiting for you to mess things up with her. I’ve had my eye on her for months… She’s so hot.”

His mind went blank, completely blank. It must have, because he didn’t remember shoving Haaland down onto the pitch, fists pulling back. He was seeing red, but his teammates dragged him off before his punch could land right on his cheek. Before he knew it, the ManCity players were charging at PSG. The whistle blew about a dozen times as the crowd got louder.

Kylian couldn’t stop trying to shake off his friends, screaming past the wall of light blue toward the blonde man on the ground pretending to be seriously injured, clutching his arm.

“Say that again! I fucking dare you!” Kylian threatened, Ramos clinging onto his shoulders, walking backwards.

He was pushed away far from the scene as his whole team began to fight with the other players in solidarity, the referee preoccupied with calming down the situation.

He was for sure already getting a red card, so his mindset was fuck it. He sprinted around the fighting crowd who immediately recognized his intentions, getting back in front of him before he could reach Haaland to really do some damage.

“Stay the hell away from her. I’ll end you, you son of a bitch. Off this pitch, I swear to god you’re dead.” Kylian talked out of his ass, already walking himself off the pitch when the referee held up a red card. He waved him off, spiting on the grass as he made his way back through the tunnel, ignoring the coaching team screaming at him altogether.

ManCity ended up winning 2-0 and Kylians suspension was decided to extend for two matches. He didn’t watch the remainder of it, but when he found out Erling Fucking Haaland scored the other goal, it felt like the knife was twisted. Fuck that guy. The press conference after was hell, having to claim that he deeply regretted his actions and that this doesn’t reflect his character or whatever his PR team wrote up for him.

He truly did feel like a dumbass. He absolutely hated how much he let those comments affect him. He knew he should’ve just blocked it out but how was he going to let him say that stuff about you? The way he talked about you like you weren’t even a person, like you weren’t the love of his life. Sure, he felt like a dumbass, but he would defend you to the ends of the earth.

He got home to his empty house, throwing himself on his sofa, flipping on ESPN to watch basketball highlights. Eventually, he drifted off to sleep. Usually, he’s opposed to naps as they throw off his sleeping schedule, but recently he’d found them comforting; an easy escape from everything going on. Besides, his sleep schedule was already bonkers from the breakup.

He swears his eyes were only shut for five minutes, but he woke up to complete darkness. His TV even timed out, neck sore from the stiff throw pillows supporting his head, groaning so loudly that it echoed inside the vacant home. It was only when he picked up his phone to check the time that he realized you were even calling. The faint buzzing was probably what woke him up.

“Shit.” He shot up, wiping the sleep from his face as he answered quickly.

He cleared his groggy throat. “Hello?”

He faintly heard you saying his name, but the music in the back was pounding. “Kyyyyks!”

He laughed to himself, loving the sound of his nickname for the first time since your breakup. “Hello? (Y/N)? Are you drunk?”

“Hold on.” He heard you yell from the other line as the music got softer in the background. “Hellooo.” You giggled.

“Hi.” He giggled back.

“I woke you up.” He could hear the pout in your voice, having to bite his lip to keep his smile from getting ridiculous.

“No, no I don’t mind. Call me anytime.” Kylian began twirling his hoodie string on his forefinger. “Are you okay?”

You nod, but he can’t hear you. Your drunk brain didn’t catch up. “I think so.”

“You think so? Where are you?” Concerned, he looked at the time. A little past 3:30 am. Damn, long ass nap.

“Umm…” You paused to look around you, seeing no signs anywhere and finding it kind of funny. “I dunno. I lost them ages ago.”

“Them?”

“Yeah, my friends.”

He stood up. “Wait, wait. Are you by yourself?”

“Mhm!” You chirped, now walking away from the club, alone. Your skin-tight tights gave you no warmth at all, but the tequila that flushed your system had you covered. “Kyks…”

“Yeah?” He waited for you to say something, his concern for you growing, wishing he still had your location so he could go look for you.

You paused, looking around the dark streets. “I mi…” your sentence drifted off and you laughed off what you were about to say. “… I’m so drunk.” You stumbled further down the street, a loud club with red lights oozing from the entrance peaking your interest.

He knew what you were about to say, but wasn’t going to push it. “I can hear that. Do you need a ride? I can come get you right now, just send me your current location.”

“No, I’m fine! Look, I found somewhere safe!” You point, even though he couldn’t see. “Oh, my god. You’ll never believe who’s here. Oh, shit.”

“Who?” Kylian asked over the phone.

You giggled. “I don’t wanna tell you, Kyks. You’ll be mad. I saw what happened today during the match.”

He was tempted to quirk a smile hearing that you have been watching, but then it dawned on him. It couldn’t be… “Haaland?”

What are the odds? Erling Haaland stood outside the packed nightclub with a few of his teammates, surrounded by women and men, all trying to get his attention. He hadn’t seen you yet.

“Oh my god, you’re such a good guesser.” You clapped. “God, I forgot how tall he was.”

He grabbed his keys, putting his shoes on, holding the phone up to his ear by his shoulder as he rushed around his home. “Please just let me come pick you up. I’m worried about you, where are you? I’ll take you home.”

You got closer to the LED sign. “It’s called… uh… la petite robe noire… oh my god! That’s what I’m wearing!” You cheered.

He put you on speaker and looked it up. Jesus, you were so far, he wondered if you’d started out around there or if you’d ventured out alone. He revved up his engine, backing out of his driveway. “Stay there, I’m coming. Okay?”

You didn’t respond, your phone now by your side as Erling spotted you, jogging over to where you were standing.

“Hey!” You waved, letting him come to you because your heels hurt too badly. You couldn’t hear Kylian on the other line trying to get your attention.

“Hello, beautiful.” He leaned in and hugged you. You kind of hugged back, too drunk to balance yourself upwards that way without falling into him.

As soon as he heard that fucking accent over the phone, he pressed his foot down on the pedal, hoping he hits every green light in Paris. You, on the other hand, forgot you were still on the line with your ex fiancé, but hung up when you realized it with a giggly “oops!”.

“Didn’t think I’d run into you, how are you, (Y/N)?” Haaland asks, placing a steady hand on your waist to keep your wobbling frame from tipping over.

“So good!” That was a lie. You were out tonight drinking away the pit in your stomach since the match. You’d watched sneakily from your desk, fingers tugging at your roots when you saw the little incident during the first half. During those last ten minutes, you felt like you were going to throw up.

Why did you have to tell Kylian about Erling? What happened today definitely opened him up to a lot of criticism from his coaches, the team, the media… You couldn’t help but feel a little responsible because you knew he could behave himself if he never knew about that night on the balcony. On the other hand, it was kind of… very hot. Jealous Kylian was never your favorite, but you can’t stop yourself from feeling something spark in you. Or maybe you were just horny. Who’s to say? It's been so long...

“You’re good?” Erling accent repeats, grinning down at you. “Sorry to hear about your breakup."

"Pffft." You laugh. "Yeah right, you two were never exactly friends."

He shrugs, sticking his hands in his pockets. "You're right. I'm not sorry." He smirks, looking you up and down. If your head wasn’t filled with liquor you’d feel kind of gross, but his flirty stares didn’t mean anything to the drunken body you found yourself in tonight. It all went right over your head. He nods his head toward the club. "Come on, let's get you a drink, yeah?"

You followed him in, the lights were blurry and the ground wasn't very stable. The vibrations came up from the ground, making you feel like someone was shaking your brain around. You were absolutely not thinking straight, and it only got worse when a bottle girl came over to the section with Don Julio. It was all so fast, like the lights flashed and you were suddenly with someone else, or in a different part of the club, or dancing, drinking, stumbling.

Fuck, you had to get out of there.

Kylian arrived at the club and he definitely did not fit the dress code. But, despite his grey joggers and Nike hoodie, he was still Kylian Mbappé, so he got in without any issue. Ideally, he wouldn’t have to risk being spotted at a nightclub that Erling Haaland was at, but he did it for you. He politely smiled at his fans but weaved past people begging for a selfie. He called you plenty of times from the car, but you never picked up.

Once inside the club, he lifted his hood and put on some sunglasses, hoping this wouldn't cause a riot without his security to lead him through the crowds. People were too focused on grinding and not spilling their drinks to notice the international superstar frantically searching for one single woman in a sea of them.

He looked up at the sections on the second floor, finally spotting that tall blonde bastard, wasting not a single second before making his way up, security letting him through once he flashed them his famous smile.

"Haaland!" He cups his hands around his mouth, hoping that he knows where you are. "Haaland!"

He finally turns around, knitting his eyebrows at the sight. "Kylian." He steps around the models to stand close to him, the loud music making it impossible to communicate from even a few feet away. "What? You didn't get enough of me on the pitch today?"

Kylian rolls his eyes. "No, man. I'm just looking for (Y/N). I know she was here."

"Yeah, she was." Erling laughed. "She's wild, for sure. Don't know where she went, though."

"What? She's not here?"

Haaland shrugged. "She went to the bathroom and never came back. Why do you even care? Like I said, she's up for grabs. She's not yours anymore."

If he wasn't so worried about your current wellbeing, he would have grabbed his stupid little ponytail and gone full Fight Club on him. But he didn't, instead he shook his head at him and made his way down from the section before he regretted not throwing a punch or two.

His concern grew. He never thought he would wish you were with Erling Haaland at a nightclub, but at least he could find you then.

Kylian stood on a ledge hoping to see your hair or face anywhere from a birds-eye view, but had to leave promptly when the partygoers caught onto his less than great disguise. A security guard from the club lead him to the back exit, warding off flashing cameras in every direction.

Thanking the man when he was safely outside with a fist bump, he walked himself down the dirty metal steps, sighing. "Putain." He walked to is parked car, leaning on it to try and think a little, wondering how he’s going to find you. He really isn’t familiar with this part of town, but he'll stay out all night if he has to.

He wished you’d just pick up the phone, ease his jittery nerves. Just as he was about to click on your contact, he heard some slurred singing further down the alleyway he was in. The faint tune sounded familiar, but the voice definitely was. It was you.

He followed like a siren sound, turning the corner to see you sitting on a small cement step, head resting on your curled up knees, giggling to yourself as you continued the song.

"Sweet cheese are made of cheese, who am I to *hiccup* disa-cheese..."

"I think you've messed up the lyrics there, love." He smiled, letting out a breath he’d been holding now knowing you're okay.

You gaze up, smiling widely, gasping and jolting up, wrapping your loose arms around his neck and letting your legs go limp.

"Woah, hey..." He exclaimed with a laugh, grabbing your torso tightly to keep you upright.

"You're here!" You gaze up, grin wide as he peered down at you, smiling as well. "Whadda coincidence!"

It was like he didn't just spend hours worried sick, now feeling somewhat at ease. Your presence is all he needed for every weight to be lifted off his shoulders. He only cares about making sure you get back home with a glass of water on your nightstand and a trashcan at your side.

"You okay? Why are you out here by yourself?" He guides you to stand properly on your own, but you didn't let your grip go, so he didn't either. He let his hand stay on the small of your back, his other gripping your hip.

You shrug, scratching your fingernails against the nape of his neck. He shivered, goosebumps running down his body, letting a flustered giggle escape his lips. You stared deep into his eyes. Your funny demeanor simmered down, finding the familiar warmth of the man in front of you to be more intoxicating than anything you've drank tonight. "You always loved when I did that..."

Kylian's heart got caught in his throat, gulping it down along with the urge to hold you so tightly. He'd been craving your touch, spending many sleepless nights wondering if he'd ever get to feel you again.

"Let's get you home, okay?" He mumbled, running his hands down your arms to unwrap them from his neck. He held one of your arms as he bent down to grab your phone and purse from the dirty floor.

He started guiding you to his passengers seat, but getting you there wasn’t an easy task. Your heels kept getting caught in the cobblestones so he had to keep a steady hand around you in case you fell. He buckled you up like a toddler, doing his best to ignore the googly eyes that you made at him.

When he got in drivers seat, he looked over at you, a rush of memories making his heart flutter.

All of the times he would turn his gaze away from the road for just a second to see you. The way you smiled when you rode with the windows down, sticking your arm out to feel the rushing wind outside the car. The way he used to be able to put a comforting hand on your thigh while he drove and you'd draw circles on his knuckles mindlessly, rambling about anything that came to your mind. The way you would always unwrap a piece of gum for him because you didn't want him distracted, even though he would never not get distracted by you.

He shook the thoughts out of his head, clearing his throat. "So, what's your address?"

You laughed, taking your heels off. "I dunno."

"What do you mean, you don't know?"

"Geez, Ky. I've only lived there for like..." you counted in your head, but numbers barely made sense sober, "...not that long."

"Do you have it on your phone?" He pried, handing you your cell.

"Yes!" You cheered, snatching it only to see that it was out of battery when the screen reflected back at you. "Ah, man. It's dead!" You pouted, throwing it in the backseat, crossing your arms.

He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, turning on the heat higher when he noticed the chills running down your arms. "I can take you back to... uh..." he stuttered, having to stop himself from saying our place, still getting used to living there alone, "—back to my place."

You gave him a look, raising your eyebrow dramatically. "Nice try, Casanova." You chuckled.

He laughed too, rubbing his eyes. "No, come on, (Y/N). There's like five beds. I wouldn't take advantage of you like that."

You bite your lip and stare at him through your lashes. "I'd let you."

God, that stare. That tone. He's internally cussing himself out for all those times he told you he wasn't in the mood or too tired. He wished he could go back in time and slap himself.

He quickly shook it off, laughing dryly and having to look away from you. “You are so drunk.”

With that, he put the car in reverse, beginning the half hour journey back to the home that still has pictures of you on the walls. The home that still feels like it’s yours, the one that Kylian prays he’ll see you wake up in again… at a time when you’re not absolutely plastered, of course. For now, he’s content looking over to your sleeping figure in his car, slowly breathing and shifting every so often.

Once he pulled into the garage, he got out and made his way to open the passenger door. “Hey,” he gently put a hand on your cold shoulder, “we’re here, bébé.”

He didn’t mean for the nickname to slip out of his mouth, but it did. It actually woke you up, your heart thumping at the four letters that used to be so familiar to you, so intimate.

“I’m tired.” You grumble, putting your hands out toward him, slightly less drunk, yet nowhere near sober. “I forgot how comfy your car is.”

“Wait ‘till we get you into a real bed. You’re gonna sleep like a rock.” You grabbed his forearms and stumbled out of the car, Kylian quickly grabbing your heels, phone, and purse.

For a drunk, you moved surprisingly fast, beelining to the kitchen. He followed you in, attentive to your wonky steps. He set your belongings down on one of the barstools, turning to see you leaned inside of his fridge, grasping the handles for balance.

“You hungry?” He grins, walking around the kitchen island and leans against it.

“Mm… you got rid of all my snacks…”

“Uh, not true.” He quipped, opening the cupboard and pulling back a red box, the sight bringing a big smile to your face.

“Pancakes?!”

He opens the cabinet bellow him and pulls out a sleek black press, confident smirk spreading to his cheeks. “Waffles.”

You cover your mouth in excitement, stumbling backward a bit but catch yourself on the island. “No way.”

He nods, eyes twinkling at your enthusiasm. You look so pretty in this kitchen. It’s nostalgic. It feels warmer now that you’re back here, even if he’s just pretending to forget that you’ll have to leave in the morning.

“Go sit. They won’t take long.” You do as he says, hopping into a stool as you watch him begin to mix the ingredients in a bowl.

Your mind drifted to the last time you saw him. The way his chin quivered when he cried over you, how much it hurt to tell him you weren't ready and that you may never be. It was still true. In a more clearheaded scenario, you probably wouldn't be here with him right now. If alcohol didn't seem like such an inviting bandaid to your aching mind and heart, the feelings you'd been suppressing would likely have stayed suppressed... where you honestly wanted them to stay. Opening yourself back up to be loved by the same man that made you question yourself was still incredibly scary.

"Bon appétit." He placed the plate in front of you.

The waffle was dusted in powdered sugar, a small butter square in the middle was surrounded by sliced strawberries. "Oh... my... god..." You salivated, picking up the fork and knife he handed you and devoured the first bite, moaning in gratitude. "Oh my god." You had no other words.

Kylian laughed, picking up his own fork to dig into his less pretty waffle, standing across from you. "Yeah?"

He didn't get a verbal response back, but knew you meant it upon seeing the manner in which you inhaled every crumb on your plate. Your late night snack was gone too soon and you wanted more, but your drooping eyes and full bladder convinced you that sleep was better.

Kylian took his last bite, grabbing your plates and setting them in the sink. "I think it's bedtime."

You agreed without saying so, hopping off the stool and took the route to the master bedroom. You could walk there with your eyes closed and you might as well have. The sleep deprivation mixed with your drunkenness lead you straight to the dresser, opening up the top chest on your side to grab a t-shirt.

When your crossed eyes looked down at the empty drawer, it was sobering. You let out a shakey breath, clasping your hands in front of you. "Right..."

Kylain stood by the door, frowning at your stillness. The small window of bliss he had with you just seconds earlier shattered upon seeing your sorrowful face looking down at the drawer that used to contain your things, now containing nothing but memories of what used to be.

Silently, he walked over to you, gently shutting it for you. He opened up his side, handing you one of the shirts you left folded for him. One of your favorites. "Here."

You give him an attempt of a smile but don't actually look at him. "Thanks."

He goes to leave the room but you stop him. "Wait. Where are you going? I'll sleep in one of the guest rooms. I'm not taking your bed."

"No, please. You just get some rest, okay?" He almost whispers, taking in the sight of you standing in this room again before he went to close the door.

"Ky?" You breathe, locking your eyes on his. There was something you wanted to say, some words your throat closed up on, leaving you with nothing else but silence. He stayed still, his adoration for you threatening to spill out of him the longer he stared at you. You draw a subtle breath upon feeling your emotions pooling in your eyes. "Thank you."

Kylian felt the weight of your otherwise simple words, taking context from the way you were looking at him. "I'll always be here for you."

With that, he reluctantly closed the door behind him, trudging to the bedroom closest to you.

The room spun as you laid down on your favorite pillow, beyond comfortable under the duvet you picked out yourself. You wished you never went drinking tonight. If you'd just stayed home and pigged out on ice cream you wouldn't have to face the truth that's been slowly crawling to the surface.

Your eyes shut much too quickly to really explore the sentiments you've uncovered tonight, but that's probably for the best.

Kylian's mind was racing and he only hoped you couldn't hear how loud his brain was from the next room. Under the guilt and self-pity he's been swimming in for weeks, he finally felt a sliver of optimism beginning to grow inside of him. It was such a tender feeling, a feeling he let lull him to sleep, content knowing you were just on the other side of that wall.

A/N: The amount of times this deleted..... I was going crazy. Thank god that I started saving every draft on Google Drive or else I probably would have stopped writing out of frustration. Big things coming for (Y/N) and Kylain! Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and I'm sorry about having to make Haaland an asshole bc I really do love him. It was just to move the plot along <3. Also I didn't know all of the soccer terms in english so forgive me if I messed any of that up. Love all of you and thanks for reading!

[notebooks-and-laptops]

No one asked for it, but I'm gonna do a: Notes Plays Bg3 with all my thoughts! I'll be tagging it as Bg3 spoilers, tho I'll try and keep any big ones out and also Notes plays Bg3 so you can blacklist if needed!

Notes plays Bg3: first thoughts:

I'm a TAD disappointed in the CC because I knew it was super realistic so expected to be able to edit more and pick my nose/eyes/mouth/jaw/cheeks/lips shapes etc. And not being able to do that made me a little sad cos it's one of my fav parts of dao dai and da2 to actually customise my character and make them how I want. However, do enjoy all the hair options and being able to give my dwarf girl a beard so ups and downs.

Also speaking of the CC I made my girl before I realised subrace was a thing and then had to remake her and that was deeply deeply annoying

I also sorta wish their was more guidance in the cc about what being a disciple of a particular god might look like/mean

The animation in the cut scenes is INSANE holy fucking SHIT they put their ENTIRE pussy into it and it shows that opening god DAMN

Love those creepy brain guys I want one as a pet I love the way they scuttle and their creepy child voice

Mean lady? She is my WIFE and I LOVE HER and you will NOT be taking her from me

I freaked out for a while not knowing how to get Shadow heart out like I fully was like IM GONNA FUCK IT UP SHES GONNA DIE but thankfully she has not

Vampire Bois entrance didn't really do anything for me tbh altho I do see the Dorian in him that people have been talking about he's even got the same inflections in his voice sometimes

I LOVE gale and his entrance what a charismatic funky dude

Not met anyone else yet but going looking for them now!!

I do not enjoy the mechanics of moving my character and really wish I could just move them rather than clicking. I'll get used to it but I think that'll be the barrier between me and replays.

I do like the combat tho and am excited to get into the swing of that cos it's more technical and limiting than some of the more basic dragon age combat and so there's more skill to it I think

[promisinininining]

hello :3c all questions with the number 3 ( :3c ) in them, my good friend mis! :3c

Admittedlty, I started this. I shall accept my punishment with grace (💖).

Disclaimer here that there will be references to nsfw under the cut because I peddle smut. There's also a brief mention of vomit in a snippet I share.

3. Describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic I write on my phone mainly, and I like to be curled up in a nest of some kind and comfy when I open up my Big Doc of Ideas and start typing. if it gets long enough (~1k words) I move it into its own doc. I reread constantly when I write, and often times I just sit and stare at a sentence until my brain clicks on. It also helps to bounce ideas off friends as I'm working, if I feel my steam running low. Otherwise I get into Da Zone and everything else disappear.

13. What’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow? Ah. Hm. I don't actually know many "common" tips. I find a lot of them not very useful, like "write every day" just leads to burnout. I suppose there's this: sometimes, when you write yourself into a corner and don't know how to continue, go back a little bit further and try a new direction. Still Stuck? When I don't want to write a scene I simply don't and move on. Sometimes you never have to go back. It's fine. It wasn't that important anyway.

23. Best writing advice for other writers? ARE THE TIPS NOT GOOD ENOUGH? Okay Fine. Write what you want. Write weird shit, write horny shit, write stuff that disgusts and uncomfortablises people. Write the stuff that interests you rather than what you think other people would like. I made a promise to myself when I stepped back into fandom, and that was that I wouldn't be ashamed of anything that I liked anymore, and it's been an absolute blast. (Coming back up here after a few questions) WAIT- When you don't know what to do, ask yourself, what would be sexiest? and go with that. Never fails.

30. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished? I'm happy sharing rough drafts. I tend to edit as I go so the top of my docs always end up pretty polished as opposed to the endings... shhh. I don't tend to share much of rough drafts in public, though, some friends get basically the entire thing through screenshots, lol. I can't resist okay! I'm excited about what I'm writing! I can't keep it all inside!

31. Do you start with the characters or the plot when writing? Characters, definitely. Most of my stories are character-driven, and plot tends to happen around them, even aus are usually 'well what if they were brought up in THIS environment?' and whatever happens to them grows around what the consequences of their actions. I'm not very good at longfic and a lot of my fics are oneshot character studies so :Va Not that I'm saying I'm bad at what I do, plot is just not my priority! I Find characters, their relationships, and their personalities more fun to explore! (<- was raised on the Tales Of games)

32. Name three of your favorite fanfic writers. Fuck, okay. Well it probably doesn't surprise you that I make friends thru fanfic so I have a lot of writer friends and I don't LIKE to pick favs, simply because I don't think of them that way. That would be weird. Additionally, I only really read stuff my friends write nowadays ;w; I'll name the people who I've reached out to over completely losing my shit over their fics instead, in order of meeting them: Elcie/BurningLio, Bee/println0/slothencholy, Mango/MalevolentMango (and here, an honourary mention of Ailem for appearing alongside Mango though I hadn't read any of its fics until after we had become friends).

33. Five years from now, where do you see yourself as a writer? Sure. I don't see myself stopping any time soon.

34. Do you want to be published some day? (yes I swapped 33 and 34 by accident so sue me) Eeehhhh, as someone who writes mostly erotica I don't reaaaally see any of my stuff being published by any mainstream publishing houses. I certainly WANTED to when I was younger, and it would certainly be cool, but it's not something I am persuing or even have an interest in persuing.

35. What is one essential thing to remember when writing a villain?  They gotta be as hot as possible.

36. How do you write kissing scenes? Okay so disclaimer, I've been writing fanfic for a VERY long time. I was on the internet before I should have been. My parents didn't speak english very well, and stuff like google translate didn't even exist (rather, it did, but it wasn't very good). I was ten, and I asked Google sensei how to write kisses, and the first result took me to a yahoo questions page where the answer was something like, describe how they feel instead of the kiss itself. I then deleted my history because I was not a stupid child. I remember that advice to this day.

37. How do you choose where to end a chapter? I uh. Write oneshots. I end it where the story ends. Hope this helps :)

38. Would you ever write commissions? Yes but nothing too long. I've been meaning to open up writing commissions for literal years but I KEEP getting too sick to be able to dedicate the time it deserves to run commissions.

39. Share a snippet from a WIP Huff okay. This should be shiny and new for even you, Mango.

"Akechi-" "I'm fine," Akechi grits, spitting more acid onto the ground before he finally straightens and wipes a sleeve over his face. Akira doesn't even try to hide his expression when Akechi deigns to face them again. He states the fact plainly. "You're not fine." "Don't try to tell me what I am or not," Akechi sneers in return. He's clutching at his stomach despite his nonchalance, and a grimace clings to the edges of his pissed off expression. Akira rolls his eyes. There's no point arguing with Akechi on a good day, never mind when he's defensive and scared of being benched. They don't exactly have a choice to keep Akechi in combat as there are only three of them, and Kasumi is completely new to this kind of palace exploration. He may not be Futaba, but he has the most experience in the Metaverse by far; he's observant, meticulous, and his ability to memorise the attributes of new shadows is impressive. Akechi really had been holding back on them in Sae's Casino, and Akira isn't stupid enough to let that kind of usefulness go to waste.

43. Do you take a sadistic joy in whumping your characters, or are you more the "If you hurt them I would kill everyone and then myself" kind of person? lmao. do i even need to answer this?

53. How do you spend your time when it comes to fanfiction? Are you primarily a fic reader, writer, or a perfect 50/50 split of both? I'm primarily a writer. I used to read a lot but I have a hard time reading anything nowadays. I need to be doing something or else I'll EXPLODE. KABOOM. No more mis. splat like watermelon.

63. Something you hate to see in smut. I hate it when the author takes their time to write 'btw this is pure good non fetishistic sex' through the characters. It's ridiculous. I'm here for a good time not to get lectured on what safe sex is. If the reader needs to be told what consent is, I'd argue that they aren't old enough to be reading it.

73. What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works? Brother I do not know. I kind of fly by the seat of my pants. Lich Rally Just Vibin.

[winderlylandchime]

I still cannot believe someone from Europe cares about my brother watching a tv show. Actually I still can’t believe anyone including you cares about him. But to explain how we/he watches the episodes: at the beginning i was in full control of the dvd cases because there are episode descriptions on them. And when you click on the episodes to play it also shows descriptions. So the way we at first did it for him to avoid any spoilers (his wishes bc he absolutely hates spoilers) was that he would close his eyes until the episode started. BUT then he started to care a lot more than he expected and tbh he was less high from his meds so I couldn’t win fights anymore so he wanted to control the dvd cases and the cds and all that. So he made me tape a piece of paper over the descriptions on the cases and then, like a fucking child, after I/he puts the cd in, he selects the ep number and then closes his eyes and either makes me press play or he hopes for the best and does it himself. One time he pressed play and one of the bts interview videos started playing and he covered his ears and screamed like a child until i turned it off. Anyway all he’s seen so far is the dvd intro with the episode numbers and nothing else. He hates spoilers of any kind so he’s treating this like his life depends on it. Few years ago when the Avengers movie came out (the one with iron man’s death) he didn’t leave the house for 2 days because he was scared of spoilers and he even deleted his entire social media cause of it l so this is not even the top 20 most dramatic things he’s done when it comes to shows/movies. So what I’m saying is, he has no fucking clue about episode titles or anything, so all will be news to him. And tbh I’m very happy about that because 1) in the ep descriptions Vic’s death is also revealed in a description later on so he’d for sure see it and 2) I completely forgot the 10th episode title and when I saw your response with the screenshot I actually felt relieved that he’s such a drama queen because I cannot wait for him to see that little moment so if itd be spoiled for him, id riot.

OH your brother has fandom blood running in his veins. His commitment to avoiding spoilers for his media is commendable. I had to do the same thing when I was traveling for the end of last season of RPDR (btw I adore Jinkx! Good taste brother anon!). (And then I realized that because I was abroad the WoW app would actually show the American franchise episodes and I could watch it.)

There are fans from Europe here on tumblr and the person I text with was on tumblr but deactivated while making me promise to keep them appraised of your brother’s reactions. We’re all invested because this is the most exciting thing to happen in the fandom since 2020 20th anniversary YouTube thing. And Gale didn’t show up so this is even better because your brother is wholly focused on Britin (sorry Scott ILY but no one cares about Ted). (Also remember the early days of the pandemic when we could just watch hours of our favs from an ancient tv show catch up?)

I promise that every single person is holding their breath for your brother to watch 510. His reaction is going to be everything.

[nettleshuttle]

I'm gonna ask for a character too! Who?

My girl Akiza! :)

ooh very gladly, one portion of thoughts on aki coming right up! (disclaimer: i’ve watched up to 80 eps of 5ds until now, so that’s the scope of my opinions)

how i feel about this character: if my tumblr layout wasn’t enough of a hint, i really love aki. she’s definitely the best love interest in ygo, both in terms of my personal favs (though asuka and yuzu are neat too) and, like, objectively (as in best written, most complex). she’s got some great tropes in her character, fantastic intro and development and her relationship with yusei makes me tear up at every duel they play. also her design and deck make-up are just >>>

all the people i ship romantically with this character: yusei. i’m so glad this is a canon ship because this content brings me undue amounts of happiness. the start of their relation was what particularly hit me, with their initial duel and the one in the hospital, then how he consoled her after the whole thing with divine, taught her to ride a d-wheel (built one for her??) — yusei’s as precious as can be and she deserved someone like that so bad. as an optional no. 2 in this short list i’d put sherry — their ship appeals to me far less, but, y’know, lesbians on motorcycles. i’m a weak human sometimes.

non-romantic OTP: hmm. actually, i feel like aki has little to no relationships apart the one with yusei — she was deliberately isolated from others by divine, then when he died yusei seems to be the only one she really trusts. crow and jack appear really distant from her, although they are friendly towards one another — it struck me when crow specifically mentioned how aki hangs out with the signers not so frequently and i just get the impression she doesn’t fully consider them as her friends. i’d put sherry here because they’d have a nice vibe also as besties on motorcycles and also maybe rua and ruka? aki taking care of them is really nice and though, of course, they won’t be her friends the way a person her age would be, it’s still a good relationship.

unpopular opinion about this character: i wrote that i like the make-up of her deck, so, to clarify: black rose dragon is just great and the overall aesthetic of the cards fits her perfectly, but the way it’s constructed, game-wise, is absolutely garbage. why does she have a plant based deck and plant effects for a non-plant ace? why are her best tuners suited to a different star rating than 7? why does she not have cards that would alleviate black rose’s self destruction? i play rose dragons in duel links and it makes me just livid how stupidly this all was planned out because it doesn’t make sense even with adjustments that konami introduced later — and, consequently, they’re making her play some really bad duels in the show. i mean, she could be so damn strong if they admitted her some properly designed cards? i get that she’s one of the more powerful love interests anyway, but, come on, asuka could have gotten a playable deck and not aki?

also idk if that’s unpopular, but i want to say it: she’s probably the only character in the whole series whose psychic powers feel justified and make sense. they have more downsides than anything else, but they’re still ironed out into a real strength in the end, they add a lot to character, her personality is built accordingly, everything clicks together.

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon: apart from giving her a better deck and a chance to kick some ass with that? definitely a better ending to her relationship with divine. yeah, he was a toxic, manipulative bastard who fucked her up bad in the head, but he was the single most important person in her life for so long (if not forever, before yusei) that randomly killing him off feels so unsatisfying. let her defeat him in a duel? let her break free of him on her own? the guy caused her so much trauma, she should have had the chance to overcome that (and him) on her own, instead of such a bland resolution.

[dyed-red]

#sometime i really need to write my 'john and Mary are both resurrected by amara' fic #just so i can write their discomfort at sam and dean being more domestic and settled than they ever were

outsider pov john AND mary my goddamn fucking adored i just wanna torment them a little bit there's so much you can do with them tho obviously my fav thing is them being really worried about sam and dean and then finding out they're literal fucking soulmates like oh they were never gonna be normal huh

literally it's so --

like i go back and forth on it, but tbh the way it exists in my head as an ongoing draft has sam and dean as Not (Yet) Together in a weird state of like - semi-unrequited, semi-requited attraction mess.

i picture it similar to their dynamic in Architecture of Choice (shameless self-plug sorry not sorry) in which they've always helped each other with a kissing curse or sex curse or with incubus venom or what-have-you, but are actually in a gencest state, for all intents and purposes.

but dean's (canonical) obsession with sam shines through in this dynamic even more extreme, slanted with attraction that's hard not to notice. does he want sam or want to consume him and keep him safe inside his ribcage? hard to say! but john and mary can see it's Not Normal.

meanwhile sam is like :) it's fine :)

and john hasn't put together yet that sam is unhinged in a complementary way to dean and that he actually feeds on this obsessive dynamic between them. john is too busy being guilty about what he told dean to do before dying and too busy seeing his vulnerable little kid sammy and stubborn teenage son turned very obviously ptsd-affected nervous stranger in sam's skin to really click that like, this grown ass man isn't a victim, he's actively choosing to play brotherwives with dean in this manner.

mary, on the other hand, is Weirded Out and she doesn't know how to set aside her guilt to simply talk to the son she sold to the devil so she observes sam and is like Oh, He's Making It Worse. if anything she understands dean's side more readily like, you were raised to be a protector and you sacrifice it all just to be at his side. i (unknowingly) sold my own son to get my husband back, I Get It.

mostly i want to write this fic because i have this one scene that i keep replaying in my head from different angles of john confronting dean about it in the library room with the tables and lamps, about his attraction to his brother and how he keeps him here and whatnot (you're supposed to be a good little soldier dean, you're not supposed to have wants and needs of your own, you're supposed to protect sam in the way i see fit, not the ways you see fit) -

and dean is standing his ground because if there's one thing that has confused john since being resurrected it's that dean gives him the cold shoulder and argues with him whereas sam is patient and happy to talk, and wincing but accepting of dean's moods (this, above all else, makes john's jaw clench as he tries to reconcile the son he left behind with the flinches he witnesses now).

and their argument draws sam, who is pissed that his father is laying this at dean's feet, and he swoops in and shuts john up by kissing dean right there and avowing that he doesn't care if dean wants him 'like that' and what makes him think it's just dean, anyway, and what makes him think sam doesn't choose dean above all else in every possible way he can have him?

dean, more awed than smug, because They Don't Do That. and before john can even react, it's mary who drops a cup or plate or something that shatters because that room has uh, a lot of entrances, and she's been standing there for a while unnoticed, and where dean was struggling but standing his ground (scolded little boy) under his father's disapproval, it's now sam who locks eyes on his horrified mother and now worries that she'll look at him and see nothing but a freak.

and dean grabs him and says they're going for a drive to let dad (and her) cool off, and they have to actually Discuss what just happened :)

[destielficarchive]

Sometimes, AO3 Is Really Fucking Weird

There are several ways to effectively remove a fic from AO3. Obviously, deleting it is the most straight forward, and orphaning is a choice too, but there are several others. For example, some people just abandon the entire account and make a new one that can't be associated with their old identity. Others do a "fancy" version of orphaning, where they turn their username into a pseud and specifically orphan the pseud, so that a search will turn it up as "(original username) (orphaned)". I could go on, but listing the options isn't really the point of this post.

The point of this post relates to another of the methods some people use. Recently, I've noticed an uptick in authors who want to delete/remove their works from AO3 choosing to put them into unrevealed/hidden collections which they themselves own. This has multiple advantages - the biggest and most obvious is that it preserves kudos, comments, bookmarks, and hits. It enables the author to still see their own story if they want to, but they also don't have to. Further, if they're ambivalent about out-right deleting it, they don't have to, and they don't have the loss of control that comes with orphaning - by putting it in a collection, they can always always choose to either delete it later, or re-associate it with themselves later. They can edit it easily, c&p easily, all that jazz. Links to it will still work, too, they'll just show that it's in an unrevealed collection. This is how both HazelDomain and Moosefeels handled their recent mass "deletions" - nothing was actually deleted, it was all just stashed in a collection. It struck me as a very elegant solution to a lot of the problems presented from deleting (like, losing all the feedback) and orphaning (losing all control).

But.

Today while doing some of my pre-new-survey maintanence for the Destiel Favs survey, I discovered something that (as I indicate in the title) is really fucking weird, and is something that anyone who is considering this method of removing their works should know.

If you put a work in an unrevealed collection, and it's in one or more other collections, the owner of the other collection(s) will still be able to see the entire work.

I hadn't realized this sooner, because I almost never log in to the alt I use for the Destiel Favs stuff. I did all the checking for Hazel and Moosefeels using my main - which is a moderator on the Destiel Fan Survey Favs Collection, but not an owner. I'm only logged into the alt now cause I'm doing my semi-annual clean up of the bookmarks and such. And what I found was...

Well, see for yourself. When you click this link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9007867/chapters/20560327

This is what you'll see:

Nothing else about the fic will be visible, not even it's name, much less tags or anything.

But when I, in my alt as DestielFanFavsSurvey, owner of the collection, click it?

There's the fic.

Which is to say: moving a fic to an unrevealed collection ONLY completely hides the work IF it's in no other collections. If it's in a collection, it will be visible to the owner(s) of that collection, even if it's been marked unrevealed in a different collection. The "unrevealed" does NOT take precedence over a collection owner's ability to see the work regardless of the revealed/unrevealed status of the fic in another collection.

(Sorry if this is confusing, it's surprisingly hard to explain I'm finding? Basically:

Fic A is in Collection A, Collection B, and Collection C.

The owner of Collection C decides to switch the Collection to "unrevealed."

Even though the owners of Collection A and Collection B have absolutely nothing to do whatsoever with Collection C, they can still see the work.

Why does this matter?

Basically, based on my thinking about it thus far since I found out like half an hour ago, I see three ways this potentially matters:

1. For people actually running challenges, who actually WANT the capability to make a work unrevealed, make sure that the author doesn't put it into other collections, because it will still be revealed to the owners of those collections.

2. For authors who are worried about adding their works to collections and having the owners subsequently fuck them by reverting it to hidden, if you make your OWN collection, and add all your own fics to it, you can at least maintain your own access. (which you can do anyway by going to https://archiveofourown.org/users/(YOURUSERNAME)/collection_items?approved=true, and you can remove them there too I think, but still).

3. For people who want to use this as an alternate means of deleting their works, people like me will still be able to see it. If you REALLY want to make sure no one has access? You'll have to make sure you remove the work from all collections other than your own, because otherwise, the owner(s) of other collections the work is in will still be able to see it, bookmark, kudos, or subscribe. They will NOT be able to comment or download it (I checked) but they CAN copy and paste it.

I honestly have no idea if this is meant to be a bug or a feature, and the frequency with which it'll matter to folks is likely nil, but still, it's a pretty noticeable loophole in the "I'll just pseudo-delete by putting it in an unrevealed collection" thing and I thought people should know.

Someone with more time than me can probably figure out more fucking weirdness related to all this, but I'm out of time. I have checked that, as the owner of the non-hidden collection, I cannot reveal the fic myself, nor can I do anything other than my usual moderator/owner options (add it or remove it are about all I can do.)

But basically: be aware, if you really want to use the unrevealed collection method to hide your work, make sure you remove it from any collections you don't own!!!

@ao3commentoftheday sorry for the random ping but this seemed like the kinda bizarre-ass AO3 shenanigans thing that might be of interest to you and the people who follow you. (And sorry if you already knew this - I knew that the owner of the unrevealed collection could see the works, that's not news to me, but that the owners of OTHER, separate collections can ALSO see it is, uh, a shock, at least to me.)

[yandere-sins]

One More

Genshin makes my imagination vibrate pleasantly. I just want to give Kaeya a reason to make me go “Oh?” cause he’s not even my one of my favs. But the sheer sex appeal coming from that man is dangerous.

Characters: Kaeya Alberich (Genshin Impact) x Reader Warnings: Yandere, Groping, Innuendos, Alcohol, Aphrodisiacs, Insults

»»———————— ♡ ————————««        

“Hey there, Sweetheart. What’s bringing you to the tavern so late at night?”

You had barely entered Angel’s Share and sat down at the bar before hearing the ever-so chipper voice of the cavalry captain drawing closer. There was nothing strange about meeting Kaeya here after a long day of work, but you and Charles exchanged a glance, the bartender sighing deeply. “I’ve only served him two drinks so far,” he explained, and you couldn’t help but think that was already one too many. 

But who were you to say no to the Kaeya?

Perhaps better than anyone, Kaeya knew about the little game you two were playing. The always so icy shoulder you gave him as he continued to pressure you with his flirts was only making him want you so much more. You couldn’t count the number of times he had stopped you in the headquarters, pinned you between him and the wall - in broad daylight nonetheless - asking how you’re doing and if you need help with anything. You. Were. Sick of it! If he wanted a child to play father for, he could ask Klee to hang out with him! You, on the other hand, were a remarkable knight, trusted enough with complicated orders that - luckily! - kept you out of the city for a prolonged time so you could avoid him. 

It only was hard when you weren’t on duty. Or in the city. Or close to him. 

That’s when he became frisky, rather needy too.

Kaeya brushed his face from the left side of your head to the right, taking a deep breath. If it wasn’t known that you two reached back all the way to your training days, anyone would have raised an eyebrow. But most of the other guards were able to brush off his weirdness for affectionate friendship. It was almost like only you could see behind the farce, and perhaps his estranged brother. Not like Diluc had been any help to you, though, aside from breaking Kaeya off you once or twice when he was around and noticing your discomfort.

Taking up the stool beside you, there was no prior question if the seat was taken. A rather empty keg arrived with Kaeya at the bar, and he briefly tapped the rim until Charles fished for another bottle of alcohol to fill it up with. One could say Kaeya and a drink were a good mix, but to you, they were a terrible combination. Drinking made him bold. Unrestrained even. 

Even though he offered his keg to you, you merely looked away, sipping at your own glass, one you much rather preferred to the brew he drank his night away with. Grinning, he instead took a hearty sip, leaning against the counter leisurely as he watched the bards perform near the entrance, but you didn’t miss even a single glance he sent your way every few seconds. 

It was very unfortunate that you liked Angel’s Share for its drinks best; otherwise, you’d have had a good reason to avoid the establishment. But at the same time, you couldn’t let Kaeya direct all of your life. It was no state that you shouldn’t do what you enjoyed just because he could be there, and yet, you considered it. 

“So, how was your mission? I’ve been missing your skills at training.”

“It was fine,” you answered curtly, uninterested in the conversation he initiated. There weren’t many people you talked to when you came back to Mondstadt. Somehow… it had always been hard for you to make friends with the other knights. Part of you suspected Kaeya being a reason why no one seemed to want to hang around, forcing you to spend most of your training with him since no one was willing to spar with you. Then again, you never had any evidence to confirm your suspicion, just like with many other phenomena you experienced over the years.

More than once had there been instances where your orders had been withdrawn just when you came close to solving the problems, often with the excuses that you were still too inexperienced or needed somewhere else. It had been so hard to raise in the ranks while Kaeya seemed to make leaps forward without a worry, but at least, you managed to secure your place now--one far away from the cavalry captain.

Sighing, Kaeya turned around to face the counter again, plopping his arm around your shoulders. Uncomfortably, you rolled your joints, but he instead pulled you closer to him, the smell of alcohol drafting off his lips as he spoke. “No need to play coy. You know you can tell me the truth. Didn’t you miss being home? I’m sure cleaning up those camps must have been exhausting!”

Missed being with me? seemed to be the words he wanted to say, but he packaged them in a way he knew they’d actually affect you. Kaeya had always been clever enough to poke the places that hurt. Of course, you missed home. You’d miss it more if not for him, but you had your family here, your siblings and parents that you’d like to see more often. But there was no chance with how much Kaeya liked to interfere in it. As if he was already part of your family, inviting himself and always showing up unannounced to hang out.

“‘Twas okay,” you replied after a moment of thought. 

“Well, I missed you,” he chuckled before taking another sip of his keg. “I missed you sooo much!”

That was enough for you, brushing his arm off roughly before turning on your stool to leave. You knew even finding another space to sit wouldn’t spare you from him, and if you ended up in a less crowded area, you didn’t want to imagine what he’d do. “Aw, come on,” you heard behind you as he gripped your arm, making you stop. “I get it, I get it, you’re tired. But you can’t be tired enough not to drink one more with your old pal, right?”

With his voice rising in volume, you two finally gained some attention, and you instantly felt a rush of embarrassment as you stared into quite a few pairs of perplex eyes. Kaeya might have been eccentric, but he was well-liked nonetheless. Causing a scene had never worked well for you, and since you were already deemed an outsider, you’d only catapult yourself more into the shadows if any rumors spread after you left. 

Clicking your tongue, you tore yourself out of his grip before sitting back on your chair again, holding up your finger. “One more. Only one more.”

“Of course,” Kaeya grinned, getting his will once again. “Only one.”

»»————— ♡

Hot lips brushing against each other, you had no better way to describe your state of being other than burning. For someone so cool and with an icy skill, Kaeya was not even close to being cold and reserved when it came to touching you. With a smile displayed on his mouth whenever he wasn’t using it to tease you, you could barely remember how you two ended up making out in one of the backstreets of Mondstadt. His hands were seemingly everywhere, and at the same time, lingered at the spots that created an audible cue from you when he squeezed them. 

“You’re so sensitive,” he noted as you hung in his arms, hands currently squeezing your ass from your thighs upwards. “That’s good, I like that.”

“Fucker,” you merely cursed back. “You only said one more drink! I feel like shit! What the hell was that?”

“On the contrary, you feel amazing,” he ignored your questions, pushing his leg between yours as he pressed you closer to the cold stone wall behind you. A welcome sensation, giving you back some of your senses as the chill helped to calm your heated body. “I fucking hate you, Kaeya,” you confessed drunkenly, but the time was as good as any to say it.

“Ouch,” he brushed it off with a chuckle. “Are you sure? Your body grinding against mine is giving me very different vibes, Darling.”

Next thing, he was back in your mouth, his tongue roaming and keeping yours busy as you slung your arms around him. “You’re so stupid and mean, always testing everyone. You’re probably the reason everyone is avoiding me too, and you don’t let off no matter how much I tell you to leave me alone!”

“Mhm,” he hummed as his lips wandered down your neck, making you stretch it out for him so he could reach better. “And now... I don’t even know! You drugged me?!” 

A soft laugh escaped him before you felt a suck at your collarbone, followed by the wet sensation of a tongue tasting your skin. “Bingo, Baby. Lisa really wanted to know what would happen if someone drank this potion and you were all too eager to get it down your throat-”

“To get away from you!” you interrupted him.

“Whatever.”

Finally, Kaeya came up on eye level again, the two of you staring at each other for a moment in silence. 

“Whatever?” you questioned, confused by his reaction. 

“Yeah, whatever. I think kissing you made me swallow at least, hm... half of it too. Even if we wanted to, we wouldn’t be able to stop now, don’t you think?” 

One of the most disgusting grins you had ever seen on the face of a person played around his lips as he pressed up to you, uniting you two in another kiss. Of course, you could stop it! You could, and you would right now. After all, you had allowed it to go on for far too long now! Pressing your hands into his shoulders, Kaeya let out a soft sigh against your lips, his uncovered eye closed as he enjoyed the affection. “One more,” he mumbled as he kissed you again and again, feverishly and impatiently. “I’ve been waiting forever to do this.”

With the excitement of a teenage boy, his hands roamed your body, pulling out the shirt from your trousers to lodge themselves beneath it. Skillful fingertips drew patterns over your skin, up your spine, and down your sides until you were gasping and shivering in his grasp. “Good,” he sighed against your lips, unbothered by you still trying to push him away, only ever flinching as he groped you. “Don’t you already know it? How much you drive me crazy? It’s only fair I drive you crazy too.”

“What the fuck are you even talking about--” you tried to contradict him. But Kaeya was quick to muffle your voice with another deep kiss. Intentionally or not, he met one of your sensitive spots as he explored you, causing a hitched moan to escape you, followed by a satisfied grunt from him. “I’ve been waiting for so long, I can’t have you take it from me now,” he breathed out huskily. 

“I’ll scream!” you threatened him. “Let me go now, Kaeya!”

“Ah-ah,” he rebuked you, one of his hands being freed of groping-duty to cover your mouth. “No one’s going to take you away from me now either. Come one, be good, okay?”

Waiting for the right moment, Kaeya couldn’t endure your angry stare for very long before falling into soft laughter. “All right, all right,” he chuckled before leaning forward brushing his lips against his hand. “One more kiss, okay? I will leave you alone after that.”

Furrowing your brows even more, he interpreted you shaking your head as a ‘no’, letting out a long, “Aww…” 

“Only one more, pretty please?” 

You had to give it to him: persistency was something he didn’t lack. It felt like shooting into your own foot, but part of you just wanted it to be over. You two had kissed so much up till now; how much worse would one more be? And if he let you go afterwards, you could definitely endure it. Lifting up your hand to yank his from your mouth, Kaeya didn’t expect you to take the initiative, looking at you perplexed as you leaned forward to kiss him. No one ever taught you how to kiss, and without his directions, you weren’t actually sure on how any of it worked, but he didn’t seem to mind, humming a pleased tune before returning your awkward smooches.

When was a kiss one kiss? When the lips parted? After the first initial touch? Kaeya’s definition was two minutes of continuous connection between you two, only briefly drawing back for air but never without upholding the contact by biting and pulling on your lip or having your tongue following his out of your mouth into the cold night. He gripped your head tightly in his palms, not allowing you to get away. Only when he let go did you fall back hard against the wall as you two finally broke apart, and you hadn’t noticed how much he had held you up. 

The rich flavor of alcohol on your tongue and his scent in your nose didn’t help with getting a clear mind, but nothing about you made sense anymore. Now that he had let you fall back and away from him, you felt even hotter than before, your body clearly bothered by the lack of stimulation. What part of ‘I wanted none of this’ did you not understand yourself? At least by the throbbing in your abdomen, you could tell that whatever kind of potion he had given to you definitely wasn’t a fun experience, but all the more potent. 

“Hurts, huh?” he laughed across from you. “Oh, fuck off,” you mustered to say, but the pain was obvious by your expression. You were barely able to keep yourself up properly.

“I’d offer my help, but you made it clear you didn’t want it.” The situation must have been really funny to him, only agitating you more. If it at least hadn’t been Kaeya, you might have accepted help, but you knew you’d have to get yourself home now all by yourself in a state of constant heat with no way to resolve it. 

“You caused all of this! You should at least take responsibility without taking advantage of the situation!”

Pushing yourself away from the wall, you decided it was time to step away. There was no use in talking with Kaeya, but the moment your support dwindled, you noticed how wobbly your legs felt, barely capable of holding you up. What had you trained all these years for if a mere potion could make you so incredibly weak? Before you could get back to the wall, one knee gave away, making you sink to the ground where you could barely catch yourself with your hands. 

“It’s really working you hard, isn’t it?” you heard him speak down from above. Squatting to your level, you felt his hand slide through your hair before gripping and lifting your head to face him. “Tell you what: If you ask nicely, I’ll help you. Can’t promise you’ll wake up in your bed tomorrow morning, but a bed nonetheless, wouldn’t that be nice?”

“Fuck you,” you hissed back, and he shook his head, disappointed. 

“Try again.”

What choices did you have? Risk the little bit of reputation you still had by being found in the morning, disheveled and drunk from the night before? The knights absolutely hated anything that would ruin their pristine prestige, so much even you knew. You had worked so hard to get where you were, could you really risk all of it? “... please,” escaped you before you could think it through further. 

“What was that?” he teased you, and you wondered why he could still be so clear even after drinking much more than you did and having had a taste of the potion from your lips. “Please help me get home.”

This time, he laughed out loud, obviously amused by how pitiful you had to behave to please him. “One more time. Say it one more time, and say it nice.”

Frustrated, you wished you could have punched him in the face, but you only bit your lip, taking a deep breath before complying. “Please, Kaeya. I need your help to get home. Please help me home!”

Embarrassment was all you could think about as he conditioned you to do as he wanted, but finally, after you did what Kaeya demanded, he petted your head, leaning forward to kiss your forehead before reaching under your arms to pull you up. “Look at you, all cute and begging me for help.”

Quickly being lifted from the ground, you found your new halt by gripping into his shoulders tightly and wrapping your legs around his waist as he held you in front of him. “You’re so adorable!” he chuckled as you clung to him much more in fear of him letting you fall than because you wanted it. He seemed to have similar thoughts, giving you a bit of a scare as he let go of you, having you hang from him by only your own strength, which you didn’t trust anymore. But just as quickly, your horrified expression made him laugh, and he gave your rear a teasing slap. Lucky for you, Kaeya didn’t make you fear any longer, embracing you back and allowing you to sink against him more as he started to make his way through the streets of Mondstadt. From an onlooker’s point of view, it might have seemed like you jumped him out of joy, but really, you clung on as if your life depended on it while Kaeya seemingly enjoyed the hug.

“Just get me home, you Asshole,” you grumbled, but your insults didn’t do any damage to his good mood. “Sure, I’ll get you home,” he replied chipper, but you already had bad thoughts as you heard that.

“At least, the place I call ‘home’,” he confirmed your suspicion, and inwardly, you already admitted defeat even as you punched your fist into his shoulder. 

“You know how it is,” he brushed it off lightly, patting your backside while he climbed the stairs towards the headquarters with seemingly no effort. 

“I can never refuse you or leave you be. I adore you way too much.”

[corhore]

Cor, sorry to say this, but you can't just open a discussion about 'Recent Comics' and just tell everyone to shut up when it's something you don't like. You can't say you 'Dont Care' when you clearly care enough to make a post about it, especially since there are a lot of comics that have suffered when comic writers that DON'T care end up writing them as shit. It's either fine that She-Hulk was written by Aaron or it's not and just focus on something else.

Okay my original point has been deluded.

My issue was that Marvel and DC both make good and bad books all the time. Some with my fav characters like with She-Hulk, but over the years I've figured out that constantly being angry at the bad stuff is mentally exhausting and simply not reading or ignoring the bad stuff to read the good books works out far better in the long run.

Like remember when everyone was saying how bad Gabby Rivera's America was? Now no one gives a shit or even remembers that book. Immortal Hulk on the other hand will be remembers for years to come because its a masterclass book that people will talk about forever.

My point is that Marvel and DC do in fact make good books. More than people think, but theres this narrative that Marvel and DC both release nothing but trash. There bad stuff get way way more spotlight because of outrage clicks. Instead of focusing on the dumb shit howabout we focus on the good stuff.

Maybe. Just maybe. Instead of constantly being outraged by whatever bad books we talk about how good Action Comics, or Black Cat, or Daredevil.

The annoying aspect is that whenever anyone even mentions Marvel or DC some smug asshole has to come in and be like "MaRveL aNd Dc aRe WoKe. mAnGa bEtTeR" completely destroying any kind of nuanced discussion.

Like I don't fucking care that manga sells better. Seeing a bunch of people say "Marvel and DC sucks they don't make anything good no more" breaks my heart man like NO they do make good stuff your making yourself completely miss out on some gold because some youtuber says Marvel/DC bad.

Its also annoying when I say something like "Squirrel girl is good actually" and then someone goes "nuh uh she sucks" like shut up god fuck off.

So yes. Marvel and DC suck in many ways, but when they release a good book which happens way more often than most people believe I'd rather reward there effort by buying and reading said book than complaining about Superman's bi son.

When She-Hulk reverted back to her normal fun self you know what I did? I cheered to the heavens and started buying her newest book. I want Marvel to know that I want more of this She-Hulk. Instead of going "oh finally she's back to normal" and then not doing anything. Cus not buying there good comics leads to dumb shit like Jason Aaron's She-Hulk because Marvel thinks maybe radically changing characters will bump sales.

So tldr:

Buy Marvel and DC's good books and stop regurgitating the exact same arguments every rage bait youtuber says.

[necros-writing-stuff]

Hi! If it wouldn't be too dark, could we perhaps have something about m!eden accidentally killing (or almost) the pc? Thanks; your blog is my newest fav🌸

Thank you anon 🥺. I'm a big fan of dark content, I'm always happy to write it.

TW for asphyxiation (decided to go for almost killing the PC here, might do actually killing later on). Extremely unhealthy relationship.

Eden hates how panicked he feels walking into town to find you. One day. He promised to let you have one day, and you've been gone three.

So many bad things could have happened. You could have been taken by someone else, been hurt. Or worse, you were avoiding him on purpose. He even has a sketch of you he keeps shoving into people's faces as he hunts for you.

People avoid or cower from him, but he doesn't care. He just needs to find you and drag you home.

He does find you eventually, walking down Oxford Street in your school uniform - laughing with someone. Letting that someone push you in a joking matter. You look so at ease with them. You're never that happy around him.

Eden's anger climbs and climbs as he approaches, and your friend notices first, face dropping.

"What the fuck are you doing?" he growls out, snatching your wrist up and yanking you away from the other student.

"Eden? What are you doing here?" You're shocked, he can tell. Eyes wide, voice going high.

"Looking for you. How long did I say you could stay away?" he leans down and gets in your face as he questions.

"I-I'm sorry, but if I missed any more school the police-"

"Bullshit, you just wanted to spend time with them instead of me, didn't you?" he nods to your friend, who seems equally scared as you.

"What? No, Eden, listen-"

"Enough. We're going home."

You're given no choice as you're dragged off, sending Robin an apologetic glance as Eden takes you away.

The walk home is tense. Eden doesn't let you go, his grip is bruising, but you dare not complain. You know how he can get when he's mad.

As soon as you're back in the cabin, he shoves you onto the floor and moves over to a familiar drawer. The leash comes back out.

"You're staying on this till you learn your place again."

You sigh and let him secure the stupid thing back around your collar. Like hell were you paying that £200 to get it removed.

"Eden, please let me explain," you beg, getting up on your knees.

"Explain what? That you're a whore who'll sleep in anyones bed?"

"I'm not a whore," you spit back at him, his anger fueling your own.

"Then who the fuck was that you were with?" Eden crouches down so you're eye level, but he's no less intimidating.

"That's Robin. They're another orphan, we've been friends for years. There's never been anything other than that between us."

Eden goes silent for a second, running your words through his head.

"Doesn't matter. I saw how they looked at you, it's obvious they-"

"For fucks sake Eden!" you plead, throwing your head back exasperation.

He doesn't like that, tugging on your leash to get your full attention. "Do not take that tone with me."

"Or what?" you laugh out, "What, you'll spank me again? Rape me again? Go ahead, I'm used to it by now."

Eden's face grows dark at your words, but you're too caught up in your rant to notice.

"I'm my own fucking person Eden! I have a life, I have people I care about, you can't just expect me to be some blank slate you can make into your perfect wife, that's not-"

Your sentence is cut off by his hands around your throat. You're pinned to the floor, clawing at the hunters fingers to no avail as he kneels over you.

The clicking noises your throat make as you try to beg, try to breathe are horrible to hear. Eden looks like an animal right now. There's no emotion on his face, just a deathly calm to him as he keeps tightening his grip.

"I'm going to die," you think over and over, "I've pushed him too far, I'm going to die."

Eden isn't sure when the haze that had come over his brain lifts, but he's aware of your hands, once clawing at him, dropping to the floor. Of your skin going blue and your eyes being unfocused and full of tears.

He immediately let's go of your throat, shocked he went so far, and feels relief when you start coughing and gasping for air.

Staying hunched over you as you curl up on your side, sobbing hard as your recover from almost dying, Eden wants to pull you into his arms and stroke your hair to comfort you. He shouldn't have hurt you like that, that was too much.

But when you flinch at his touch, he pulls away. After a moment of consideration, he risks you fighting back and scoops you up, moving you to the bed. You don't stop him.

Not knowing what else to do, Eden goes into the kitchen and starts making tea. One that'll help soothe your throat. When it's done, he tries to give it to you, to press it into your hands, but you're still too upset to take it, so he places it down and just silently stands watching over you.

"I'm sorry," he finally gets out. He hopes you can even hear him right now, because he is. But you make him so angry sometimes. There's no response, if you do hear him.

Sitting next to the bed, he waits for hours for you to calm down. He can see the bruises forming already, and makes a note not to tug on the leash too hard when bringing you around during chores.

You cry yourself to sleep, and Eden eventually climbs into bed with you, pulling you into his arms. At least in your sleep, you shuffle closer to him. He'll put some salve on your neck and make some new tea in the morning. You'll work past this, you have to.

Eden can't lose you. He needs you. Never again will he let himself get that mad.

[numetaljackdog]

what i’m listening to 8/5/2022 (song notes under the cut)

spot link//yt link

Laura Les - Haunted: haunted. by laura les

Radiohead - Idioteque: i listened to kid a for the first time not too long ago and this track made me gasp when it came on. something about it just absolutely touches the base of my skull

Rina Sawayama - Hold The Girl: my fav of the singles so far from the upcoming record. rly like the kinda uk garage sound, plus the lyrics + video hit hard. stan rina, etc

Pharrell Williams - Cash In Cash Out (ft. 21 Savage and Tyler, the Creator): took a bit of warming up to but i came around. tyler’s verse is the standout here for me, and i like 21′s contributions too. tbh i think the weak link here was, surprisingly, pharrell’s beat, but hey. still gets points for being weird ig

ANGEL_TECH - Keysmash {RE:smashed}: new banger from melodus and metagirl! def my favorite angel_tech song so far. the remix in particular is super energetic

Limp Bizkit - Back Porch: bonus track on my least favorite bizkit album but good GOD is that riff cool as fuck. literally that alone makes it worth it

Steve Lacy - Bad Habit: delightfully quirky and refreshingly summery. i’m glad to see steve lacy continue to have bigger hits bc i don’t think anyone else is doing it quite like him

Radiohead - Everything In It’s Right Place: unlike idioteque, this one took a few relistens to click. i lovvve vocal chopping/mixing and this is that good shit. catchy AND scary! one of the most songs ever

10 Years - Wasteland: have i ever mentioned that i love post-grunge

Kanye West - Gold Digger (ft. Jamie Foxx): like 80% of the appeal here for me is really just the masterful ray charles sample. maybe i should just listen to more ray charles actually

Foo Fighters - Everlong: so touching to me... reaching out for the hand of your love and holding them tight and saying this life is hard and cold and cruel very often but we are here together and i will never falter from you and we will make this worth it. we have to. i feel confident saying this is one of the greatest songs ever

Dove Cameron - Boyfriend: yeah babey let’s see some wlw rep in the top 40!!!!!! this song’s sound is kinda derivative of the billie eilish ripoff sound that has become popular since 2019 but it adds a bit of a jazz kinda thing which is fun, and also more importantly is very hot

Coal Chamber - Loco: MI LOCO. MI LOCO. MI LOCO. MI LOCO.

DJ Rozwell - F1 Tiger Road: soumds

Sugar Ray - Fly: in a surprising twist, i prefer sugar ray’s pop material VASTLY to their early nu metal shit

Limp Bizkit - Head For The Barricade: STICK EM. STICK EM.

Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz - Get Low (ft. Ying Yang Twins): do i have to say anything here? this is a total classic banger

Maroon 5 - This Love: OKAY! FINE! i’ll admit there is ONE! ONE singular maroon 5 song that i like....

Thousand Foot Krutch - Move: this song fucking sucks!!!! but it’s very funny to me. bc mr. krutch wants so badly to be like a tough nu metal guy but his voice is so thin and nothing that he just can’t 😭 i did steal this talking point from a crash thompson video btw

[writingtoforgetreality]

You’re A Winchester? (Castiel x Winchester!Reader)

Request: You are so sweet, is a little sister Winchester reader good? Like in her late 20s that is their sister from another world/dimension, but they don't have a sister in their world? And she is just trying to fit into their family but she is a good hunter? It can be with Cas Meg or both, whatever you are inspired to do :) (by @sourpatchspinster), [Supernatural-Masterlist]

Part Two

Summary: You woke up in the middle of nowhere. How the hell did you get here? The last thing you remembered was being in a motel room & all of a sudden, you found yourself lost with the worst headache ever. Who would have thought your life was about to be changed forever?

Words: 5,270

Warnings: takes place in season 15 bc I want “everyone” to be alive & happy, language (do I still have to mention this?), mentions of our dear friend Chuck, angst?, innocent reader (I don’t know what happened to me during my writing break tbh), not my fav piece but I loved the request so there you go, fluff, (possible second part?), (Y/E/C) = your eye color

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

Black. That was all you could see. Your head was killing you, it felt like someone tried to crush it with their bare hands. It took you a lot of strength but after a few attempts, you managed to open your eyes & were met with a blue sky. Huh…Did you fall asleep outside? No. WAIT?! Were you captured? No, you were just lying on the grass. Slowly, you got into a sitting position, looking around to figure out where in the hell you were. Unfortunately, your surroundings were unfamiliar. Taking deep breaths, you tried thinking logical for a second. The last thing you remembered was you sitting in a motel room, turning pages in an old diary your family left behind.

You had never met any of your family, growing up in a children’s home because…well, you had no idea if you were completely honest. Throughout the years, you had been to multiple foster families but in the end, you always ended up back at the children’s home. Not that you cared too much. It was not like you ever felt like you belonged with them anyway. On your 18th birthday, Sally, one of the employees, came into your room with a small package in her hand. That was the first time you had ever received a gift.

“It says I should give it to you today.” she handed you the small wrapped gift with a genuine smile on her face.

“What is it?” your curiosity got the best of you.

“Open up & see, I guess. I have no idea.” & with that she left you alone once again.

The day you got the diary was when you left the children’s home for good. You could not believe what you had read. Apparently, you did have a family. Or so it seemed. But why the hell had you never met them? And why the hell did it seem like your family suffered from psychological problems? Schizophrenia? To be honest, you did not care about that. The only thing that mattered to you was that it seemed like you had a father & two brothers out there somewhere. It looked like your mother had died a while ago…

~back to your confused ass self~

Being alone out in the middle of nowhere was not particularly comforting. What scared you even more was that you did not even have your stuff with you. Where was your diary? Your phone did not matter to you that much, neither did your clothes. It was not like you owned much to begin with. But that diary? That meant the world to you. Even after years of unsuccessful searching for your family, you never gave up. Because deep down, you knew you would come across them eventually.

Coming to a standing position, you dusted off the dirt that was on your clothes. A black car in the distance caught your attention. What was a car doing out here in the middle of nowhere? Maybe your kidnappers were driving it & brought you here? That thought let your heart race. Yet, you found yourself moving closer to the car. The closer you got, the more you could make out. Was that a ’67 Impala? Out here? And it looked like it was in great condition? If you had enough money you would buy a similar car & you sure would treat it the same way that the Impala’s owner did.

You risked a look inside the Impala, finding it relatively empty, but before you could spend much longer admiring it, you saw something silver in the corner of your eye. Was that a…door? Okay, yeah, you were definitely kidnapped. But not by professionals, that was for sure. Not the right time to joke? Okay, okay, right. Upon closer inspection, you noted that it was most likely a door to a bunker. Why you did not run right away, you were not sure. Something about this place felt like…home. Huh, weird. How could you be so anxious yet so at peace all at once? Only one way to find out. Oh boy, you would so regret this later.

Before you could think too much, your hand was moving towards the door, ready to push. Surprisingly, it was not locked. You had to push your entire weight against the door to keep it moving since it was so damn heavy. By now, your legs were moving on their own & all of a sudden you were standing inside a…bunker? There was not much to make out because your eyes had to adjust to the dark inside at first.

It sounded like footsteps were approaching fast but because of the echo in the bunker you could not quite tell where they were coming from. There was one thing you did notice, though, & it was the fact that there was more than one person coming your way. Fuck.

“HANDS IN THE AIR!” the click of a gun was followed after the loud voice. Obeying, you put your hands up even though you were sure nobody could see what you were doing anyway. It was still dark after all. Right this instance, light illuminated the room & you were stunned by how big the bunker was. Eyes wide, you looked around, only to find you were upstairs & the voice you heard was coming from beneath you. Gazing around, your eyes fell on two broad looking men, both of them pointing a gun at you. Fucking great. You should have run.

“DOWN. NOW.” the shorter one of the two yelled once again. Not wanting to mess with them, your legs moved towards the stairs & slowly you got down, not once letting your eyes move away from the man with the shorter hair. He seemed like the bigger threat. While the taller man looked scary as hell too, he held something behind his eyes that eased you a tiny bit more.

“Who are you & what are you doing here?” this time it was the taller man who spoke up & you had to take back your previous thought. He was scary as shit, especially with his voice sounding like he was up to no good.

“Um, I-I swear, I don’t know. I-“ but your attempts were cut short.

“Cut the bullshit right there. Did Chuck send you?”

“Chuck?” your eyebrows raised up, showing your genuine confusion.

“Dean, I don’t think she’s with Chuck.” the one with the longer hair mumbled. Dean? Huh. The name made you think of your lost diary again. You hoped you would find it eventually.

“Sit down & start talking.” he was not to be messed with so you followed both men further into the bunker until you reached a huge table. Choosing one of many chairs, you sat down but still eyed the guns that were no longer pointed at you but still very much a threat. The men each took a seat opposite of you, putting the guns on the table in front of them. At least they were not holding them anymore. You noticed you held your breath & again, started taking slower ones to calm yourself.

“I’m Sam & this is my brother Dean. We won’t hurt you, just…who are you?” what a coincidence. Brothers Sam & Dean. Were you dreaming? Of course, why did you not think of this sooner? It would make sense.

“My name’s (Y/N).” your voice was barely above a whisper & your eyes shot down to your lap, suddenly feeling small.

“(Y/N), okay. Well, (Y/N), um, why are you here?” Sam’s voice was a lot softer than at the beginning. Dean had not said anything else, he simply looked at you sternly, still thinking you were a threat. You did not even have weapons on you. Hell, you did not even know how to fight in the first place. But clearly they did not know that. Fuck it, if you were about to die then you could actually tell the truth, right? What did it matter? Your voice was quiet but loud enough so the boys could hear you.

“One moment I was reading through a dia- book & the next I wake up in the middle of nowhere with the worst headache ever. I saw the Impale parked outside & then found the door. I don’t know where I am, I don’t even know why I thought opening this damn door would be a good idea.” a slight chuckle was all you could muster right now. Hopefully they would believe you. When neither of them said anything for a few moments, you looked up & saw them eyeing each other, having a silent conversation.

“What book were you reading?” this time it was Dean but his voice was a lot kinder now. The boys knew you were not a supernatural being, the bunker was safe when it came to that & you would have not been able to enter otherwise. Yet, you were confused by his question? That was really all he cared about? Not the fact that you had no clue where you were or how you got here? Not wanting to anger him, you answered, looking him straight into the eyes.

“My dad’s diary. Nothing special, why?” a noise coming from the entrance made you look towards the door. There sure were quite a lot of people for being in the middle of nowhere. Your conversation was cut short when a voice spoke up.

“Sam! Dean! I salted & burned the bones! Case done! Well, Castiel helped me but he said he was proud of my work.” how could someone sound so excited about…burning bones? What the fuck?

“Jack did a good job today.” the other person spoke up. He was wearing a trench coat & his voice was deep, deeper than the others. Obviously, they had not noticed you yet but a look at Sam showed you how uncomfortable he was. At this point, you were more than confused. Salting & burning bones? Why did this sound familiar though? Shit. No way. Your dad’s diary was filled with salting & burning stuff. What was happening to you?

“Uh, guys…” Sam got up & approached the two men who were called Jack & Castiel. Somehow, your gaze fixed on the man in the trench coat. He looked good. Again, wrong timing, (Y/N). Get it together! Jack & Castiel saw you & their faces turned into confusion.

“Who’s that?” Jack asked, his voice did not scare you, he sounded sweet. He seemed like a kind person.

“Jack, Cas, this is (Y/N). She showed up in the bunker out of nowhere.” Dean eyed you once more before getting up himself. Frustration could be felt & you hated that you were the one causing it. Never was it your intention to cause trouble in their lives but it looked like you just did by opening that damn door.

“Could you all maybe sit down? It makes me nervous when you’re all pacing like that.” you were surprised by your own voice. Usually you were never one to intervene, especially not in a situation like this. But you were exhausted & all you wanted was just to get back to your motel & these were the only people who could help your right now. All eyes shot to you & to your surprise, they began walking towards the table. Sam & Dean, taking the seats opposite of you. Castiel sat down right next to you & you hated how your heart skipped a beat by this simple action. You did not even know this man, he could be a killer. Jack took the chair next to Castiel & Sam made it his job to explain your situation briefly. All you could do was listen, your hands fiddling in your lap, still somewhat anxious to be here.

“Cas? Isn’t there a way you could…I don’t know, check her memories?” Dean added right after Sam finished explaining. Your confused face shifted between the two men, not understanding a single word. How could a stranger help you with your memories?

“I could try. But I need your permission to do that.” while saying the last part, his eyes looked straight into your (Y/E/C) ones. Damn, his eyes. His head tilted slightly & it was only then when you registered that he had asked you a question & you simply stared at him.

“Um, permission for what?”

“To take a look at your memories & see what you remember. We could help you after that.” his voice was so casual, as if he had done this multiple times. To you, though, it sounded like he was crazy.

“Right. And you can do that because…?”

“Because I’m an angel of the Lord.” Castiel stated. A what of the what now? A short laugh escaped you. Not because you laughed at him but because you were shocked & confused.

“Cas…” Sam mumbled & put his head in his hands. That was something he had wanted to keep from you. He had a feeling you had no idea about the supernatural & he wanted to keep it like that.

“You can trust him, (Y/N).” Dean chimed in.

“Will it hurt?” not that you were scared of the pain, your pain tolerance was pretty high but on the other hand, he had just told you he was an angel.

“Only a little.” Cas gave you a reassuring smile & that was when you decided you would let him do it. Because, frankly, you did trust him. Even though he might have some sort of mental illness.

Sam, Dean & Jack left the room to give Castiel some time to prepare & to give you time to calm down. He could tell by the way your leg was bouncing that you were highly uncomfortable but he was not sure how to help. His idea was to get it done quickly & then to bring you back where you came from. Hopefully, you would not ask too many questions. He already gave too much away by saying he was an angel. Replaying your face when he had said it eased him a bit. You did not look convinced at all which was probably for the best.

“Try to breathe more evenly, it’ll help.” you could tell he was trying to make this easier for you but you just wanted to get it done.

“I’m ready, let’s do this, please.” the plea at the end was almost inaudible but Castiel could hear it anyway.

Your eyes closed as you saw Castiel approaching. His fingers touched your temples gently but the next thing you felt was a short but piercing pain shooting through your entire body. It only lasted a few seconds & the only words you could make out before you fell unconscious were “You’re a Winchester?”.

“What do you mean she’s a Winchester?” Dean asked with shock written all over his features.

“She’s related to us?” it was Sam, he took the information way better than his older brother.

“Your sister, to be exact.” Castiel paused briefly, waiting if one of the boys wanted to add anything. He took their silence as a sign of continuing. “Her father’s diary, the one she was reading before she got here, it was John’s.”

“Wait, wait, wait…WE have his diary. There’s no way she has it. Besides, we would know if we had a sister.” Dean gestured with his hands to get his point across. He had never seen you, you could not have stolen the book from them.

“You’re right. But in her world, she was the one owning it. In her world, you guys are her brothers.”

“In her world? What’s that supposed to mean?” Sam decided to join the conversation, now wanting answers himself.

“She’s from an alternate universe. I expect she was reading through a spell or something similar & somehow she got sucked into our reality. From what I’ve seen in her head, the portal closed itself behind her so if she has no idea how she opened it & got here…well, it could be hard to bring her back. Besides, I’m not so sure she wants to go back there…” Castiel’s voice got quieter at the end of his sentence.

“Why not?” Dean imagined himself in your situation & he would do anything to get back.

“It’s not really my place to tell, I believe.” & before Dean could argue any further, Jack came running into the room.

“(Y/N)’s awake.” to that everyone followed behind him to one of the many bedrooms the bunker had to offer.

You were tired but the pain had completely disappeared. No matter how hard you tried, you still could not remember how exactly you got here. The door creaked & you looked up to find Sam, Dean, Castiel & Jack entering the room. You were no longer scared. Probably because you were way too exhausted to care.

“So?” you spoke up after a few seconds of silence. Castiel stepped forward & took a seat at the end of the bed you were lying in. His ocean blue eyes looked you over, making sure you no longer were in any pain. You nodded at him to show you were fine & with that Castiel told you what he had seen. It was a lot to take in but your tired state simply made you nod at everything he explained.

“The thing is…We don’t know how to get you back.” Sam approached you slowly, took a seat in a chair next to your bed.

“Cas?” ignoring Sam’s statement, you only had one question on your mind. Back in your world, you had spent years looking for your family. For your brothers. The ones being in the same room with you right now. Also, when did you start calling Castiel by his nickname? When did that happen? His humming gave you enough confidence to continue.

“Are they alive back home?” you did not have to mention names for Castiel to know who you were referring to. His face turned into one of sadness & you knew the answer without him saying anything.

“I don’t wanna go back.” every ounce of uncertainty was gone, you knew it was fate that you were here with all of them now. The four men shared a look, having a silent conversation again. Dean nodded but left the room a second later.

“Don’t mind him, he just needs time to process.” Sam’s sympathetic smile relaxed you a bit. The bunker was nice, so was the fact that you practically met your brothers but you were not planning on staying with them. Dean’s reaction showed you why. They had lived their lives without knowing they had a sister. You, on the other hand, had known about your brothers for years & yet you did not feel the satisfaction you had so desperately hoped for after finally finding them.

“It’s fine, I’ll get going soon.” with that, you sat up straight & tried standing up. A wave of dizziness kept you from doing so. Castiel was at your side in an instant & guided you back down.

“You need to rest.” he told you.

“You’re not staying?” Jack’s voice erupted from the door. You had almost forgotten he was there too. Your eyes focused on him briefly before you looked back down again, a blush slowly making its way up  on your cheeks.

“It’s for the better. I’ll be fine.”

“(Y/N). You’re our sister. Doesn’t matter if you’re from here or from another world. You’re family. We just found each other, we won’t let you leave again.” Sam’s words made you tear up. He did not know you, yet he told you that you were family & he wanted you to stay. For the first time, you felt like you belonged somewhere & you were overthrown with emotions. Since Castiel was closest to you, he sat himself next to you, threw an arm over your shoulder & pulled you into his chest. Usually, you hated crying in front of people but right now you could not care less. Besides, being in Castiel’s embrace felt right. What was it about him? Neither of them left the room, all staying with you for as long as you needed. When you could not feel more tears flowing down your cheeks, you slowly removed yourself from Castiel, immediately missing the warmth of his body. If you were about to stay here, he would be trouble, you could feel it already. Sam, Castiel & Jack then left the room, telling you to get some more rest & to scream for one of them if you needed anything. Details could be discussed another time.

They were right, you needed sleep. Time to sort your thoughts. Maybe that was the reason why you entered the bunker in the first place. Why you were not concerned about them brutally killing you. After waking up, you were more comfortable with the idea of sticking around with the boys. Sam told you Dean would come around eventually & you just hoped he was right. Getting up, you paddled to the door, quietly opening it since you did not know how late it was. There was a long hallway that looked exactly the same, no matter what direction you were looking at. Distant voices could be heard so you followed them & prayed you would not get lost in that labyrinth of a bunker. You had to ask your brothers a question. Your brothers. It felt weird to call them that but they were, right? Back home, you had read through your dad’s diary about a thousand times. You were familiar with what he wrote about. He called himself a hunter. Sadly, you were not about to meet him. Castiel had told you that he had died a long time ago. Sam & Dean were the only family you had left.

“Um, hi.” you made yourself present & Dean turned around to meet your eyes. He looked a lot less tense, thank God.

“Slept well?” at least he was attempting to start a conversation with you. Nodding your head, you walked over to where Jack was sitting. Dean spoke up again.

“Hey, sorry for how I acted earlier. It was just a lot at once. I do want you to stay. We do.” he emphasized his words. This made you smile. At first you were not sure about how Dean would react but this showed you that he was trying & that was enough. Telling him it was fine, you sat down next to Jack & looked over at what he was reading. The book was old but the condition it was in was surprisingly well. A cup was placed in front of you by Dean & you thanked him. He brought you coffee.

“Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“Where is Sam? I wanna ask you guys something.” feeling silly with how you put it, way more dramatic than it actually was.

“Right here.” Sam entered the room, walked past Dean & straight to you. A pat to your shoulder eased the tension a little.

“What is it?” Dean seated himself on top of the table.

“Okay, so…I just want you guys to be honest with me, okay?” both men nodded, Jack was lost in his book, he did not even hear you conversation. You continued.

“Monsters are real & you hunt them?” their eyes widened at your question but deep down they expected something like that. The diary you owned was filled with the supernatural.

“Yeah, we do. It’s kinda the family business.” Dean chuckled at the end. You were family but clearly you had never hunted any monster before.

“Okay.” was all you answered.

“Okay? That’s it? You’re not running outta the door?” Sam could not believe you. He expected you to freak out. On the other hand...you were a Winchester.

“I don’t know about you, Sam, but I let an angel of the Lord look into my head. Monsters don’t sound too crazy after this.” all of you laughed out. “So, you guys hunt the supernatural. Castiel is an angel? And Jack? What is he? Your trainee?” the mention of his name made Jack look at you & before the boys could answer your question, Jack decided to take matter into his own hands.

“I’m a nephilim. The offspring of a human & an angel. Lucifer is my father but not really, you know. My mother died when I was born but I have Sam, Dean & Cas. They are my family.” his smile was too pure for this world but the way he so casually talked about the fact that he was Lucifer’s son had you stunned.

“Sure.” was all you could manage at that point. Jack’s smile grew wider & he got back to reading.

“Welcome to our world? I guess?” Sam’s smile was faked but if you were honest, you could imagine yourself being thrown into this mess. Nothing you could not handle.

~a few months later~

“Guys? Have you seen Cas?” you came running into the kitchen where Sam & Dean were having breakfast.

“What? You boyfriend ditched you?” Dean teased & earned a slap from Sam. You simply rolled your eyes at him. Your brothers realized very soon after coming to them that you had a big crush on Cas & Dean loved to mess with you.

“Shut up, asshole. We’re about to leave for the case in Wisconsin but he’s not here.”

“I haven’t heard from him but come on, sit down & have breakfast with us.” Sam offered. You walked over to the boys & sat down next to Dean who handed you a cup of coffee right away. Your smile was a thank you enough.

“Seriously, though. When will you tell him?” Dean munched on his food, not even looking at you but you knew the question was directed at you.

“That we’re leaving for the case? He knows that, Dean.”

“That you like him.” scoffing could be heard. Sam enjoyed your banter in silence. That was one indicator that you were a their sister. After warming up to them, they found out you were actually a lot like Dean. This made you guys argue more often, never too severe, mainly siblings teasing each other.

“Right, & then we’ll have that apple pie life. Is that what you want? Dean, he doesn’t like me like that.”

“Yeah, he does. Poor dude is a mess whenever he talks to you.” again, you simply rolled your eyes at him. Yes, Cas could be awkward when you guys talked but then again, this was Cas.

“(Y/N)?” Cas came into the kitchen where he could hear voices. Immediately your head snapped up & a smile started forming. An action that did not go unnoticed by both, Sam & Dean. Neither mentioned it though.

“There you are, I got worried for a second.” you got up & pulled Cas into a hug. That was nothing special. The two of you hugged each other all the time. Another thing that Dean commented on a lot of the time. Apparently, Cas had never been much of a hugger before you had come around. You simply shrugged it off even though, deep down, your heart skipped a beat at the idea of you being the reason for his change.

“Jack needed to talk to me, I’m sorry.”

“No problem, are you ready?”

“Yes, we should get going anyway.”

“Alright, bye boys.” whenever one of you got ready for a hunt, you made sure to say goodbye properly. You never knew. The last few months, your brothers had helped you with the basics of hunting. If they were honest, it felt like you were born to be a hunter. You picked up the skills quickly & learned a lot about the supernatural in a very short time. Cas told you that it probably was because you were always meant to be here. After a while, you started believing him. At first, Sam & Dean told you you were not allowed to come on a hunt with them but after realizing that you were good at what you did, you became an inherent part of the team which you were grateful for. Now, they even let you leave with Cas, a big step forward.

“Your bag’s already in the trunk.” Cas pointed at the back of the car.

“Thanks, Cas.” you lovingly smiled at him. Yeah, you were totally into him. Cas stopped briefly & got closer to you. Yet, he made sure to keep a little bit of distance between the two of you.

“Why don’t you tell me?” he whispered & you felt like you could not breathe for a second. Had he heard your conversation with Dean earlier?

“W-What?” you hated how weak & nervous your voice sounded. Why could you not play it cool? Why did you have to make a fool out of yourself? Before you could even process what was happening, Cas slowly leaned in & pressed his lips to yours softly. You were too shocked to kiss him back, not knowing if it was really happening right now. Cas pulled back & he looked rather uncomfortable. Your face was still full of shock.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done this. Just…Dean told me you liked me & then I heard your conversation & I thought you might-“ you cut his rambling off by pulling him close again. This time you kissed him & he lost no time in kissing you back. You let yourself get lost in the moment. You had dreamed about this particular moment for months & the fact that it was happening right now? Your body was on fire. When the both of you pulled apart for air, you could see Cas’ smile & you were sure your were blushing like crazy.

“So, Dean was right?” Cas’ hands settled on your waist & it felt natural. As if you had done it a thousand times.

“Remind me to kill him after this case.” you laughed & pulled Cas into a hug. He tightened his arms around you. Who would have thought, all those months ago, that you would end up with an actual family?

“Wasn’t he our…how do you call it? Wingman?” Cas chuckled after planting a soft kiss on the top of your head. He released you from the hug & you moved over to the passenger side. Your elbows were propped up on the hood & a smirk started forming at the corner of your mouth.

“Still. I told him to keep it to himself & he is my brother. I think I have permission to kill him for this.” of course you were joking & if you had to be honest, you were kind of glad that Dean could not keep his mouth shut. Cas walked over to the car, shaking his head at you but you could still see a small smile, opened the door & got in. You smiled to yourself. Finally, you knew that Cas did like you too. Where you were going from there? You were not sure yet. But there was a case you had to finish & it would take a few days to get it done. That would be enough time to figure out what you two were but you had a good feeling about this. It felt right & you had a home with people you loved & cared for. You were meant to be here from the start.

~to be continued?~ (let me know)

Part Two

Published (03/18/2021) by Cathy

Tags: @teelagurl558, @babymango-writes, @hollymac79 (thanks for your support <3)

[arhvste]

❝ GREEDY! ❞

— oikawa tooru x reader

— an: loosely based off of ‘i’ll kill you’ - summer walker ft jhenè aiko and the verse ‘fuck that my baby you all mine, greatest of all time, you better tell them hoes fall in line, i do not play about mine etc’

— dt: @seijohlogy jae bby i’m sorry this is a day late, or two when you wake up ahah,, i love you so much and i’m so glad we met, you’re one of my fav people i’ve met and you never fail to make me smile with your visits to my inbox,, atsumu and oikawa are the luckiest men to have someone like you as theirs,, they’re so proud of you and so am i,, i hope you had a really good birthday and myself, atsumu and oikawa love you endlessly <3

smiling to himself, oikawa watched as you chatted amongst other players and sponsors at the international event the two of you were currently attending.

you spared him a glance every so often, his favourite smile from you sent his way. the type of smile where a slight crinkle was drawn at the end of your lips, eyes holding a familiar twinkle in them that you only held reserved his eyes alone.

his favourite smile sent from his favourite person; you.

surrounded by players on his own team, oikawa occupied himself laughing and bantering with them, roaring laughter and excited chatter erupted between the men. oikawa could have almost forgotten about your lack of presence, but alas, he was never one to lose track of what was rightfully his; that being your attention.

he’d never once consider himself a greedy man. modest? perhaps just a little, but not at all greedy. oikawa liked to consider himself prideful more than anything, his good traits most certainly outweighing his bad. perception was everything to him and having a cool demeanor while being forced to watch other men get a little too touchy for his personal preference with you was fitting for his personal image. he refused to cause a scene, throw a tantrum and throw his rattle out the pram over something so minor, after all, it was his bed you’d always find yourself waking up in the next morning anyway.

that didn’t mean he liked it though. in fact, he didn’t like it one bit.

to have none other than the likes of miya atsumu resting a friendly hand on your arm made him twitch more than he’d care to admit. such an innocent action, yet it bothered him to no ends. the smiles you shared with him felt wasted in oikawa’s opinion.

oikawa tooru is not a greedy man; modest, but never greedy.

until it came to you of course.

your attention, rightfully his, your headspace, taken up by him of course, your body, tainted by him and only him over and over again. when it came to the likes of you, oikawa tooru became the greediest man to walk to earth. everything about you enamored him to no ends, he wanted you; needed you.

he had ensured clear claim over you despite insisting to never refer to you as a trophy to him. but, sometimes the thoughts he’d shove down would be so adamant on crawling back up though.

there was nobody like you, you were captivating, peculiar and his. he just had to make sure everyone else knew the obvious too.

excusing himself from his teammates, oikawa stood from his chair, the polished metal scraping against the hard floor suddenly. his expression contrasting his actions, the setter smiled politely as his fists clenched while approaching you. his heart sped up at the sound of your laughter, bitter feelings towards the blond too close to you in his opinion brewing inside of him.

approaching you from behind, he slipped a slender, but calloused hand over your shoulder, well built form towering over you as he forced his presence to be known to yourself and the others. a perfectly executed smile on his face, oikawa brought his other arm to wrap around waist from behind as you instinctively leaned back into his touch. satisfaction and pride already flooding his system as he sent a sly smirk towards japan’s setter.

“it’s getting a little late don’t you think?” his voice friendly with a crisp cut as he demanded the attention of those around him.

“yeah, i’m somewhat tired anyway.” you confessed as atsumu took a slight step back much to the brunette’s delight.

“didn’t know ya were datin’ the rivals setter.” atsumu joked as he assessed the internally scoffing oikawa, eyes raking over his supposed competition.

“yeah we-”

“-for 3 years now actually.” oikawa cut in, smile tightly knitted across his face as you felt his grip tighten slightly.

“ah.” the blonde clicked his tongue before getting the message. you sent an apologetic smile his way as he nodded, boastful act beginning to disintegrate as oikawa staked his claim right in atsumu’s face for everyone who could’ve been potentially watching to see.

“well, it’s been nice chattin’ to ya, i best get going back to my own team for sponsors and what not.” the setter sent one last look your way before retreating back to his own teammates where a curious bokuto and hinata were waiting to hear about what had just gone down, while ushijima and kageyama kept their respective comments to themselves, already having been through the ‘oikawa experience’ in the past and not wishing to hear more.

“that wasn’t very nice tooru.” you spoke as oikawa’s eyes flashed slightly. “hm?” he innocently whined, head tilting down to press soft kisses along your neck and shoulders for atsumu and his teammates to have a full view of.

“i know what you were doing, you don’t have to be so petty all the time. you know i love you and only you.” you sighed, hand reaching up to overlap one of oikawa’s hands that had made home on your shoulder.

“you’re all mine, they need to know that.” he scoffed, petty scowl painted across his handsome features. you laughed, sending soft flutters of butterfly wings to patter against his heart sending him into an instant ease of security.

“all yours.” you confirmed looking up at him slightly. satisfied with your answer, oikawa grinned before spinning you around to face him. pressing a quick kiss to your soft smiling lips, oikawa straightened up before guiding you over to his teammates to show you off just one more time and then bid them a goodnight.

oikawa tooru is not a greedy man, he knows you’re always going to end up in his arms, his bed, his world anyway so he wasted no energy on such unnecessary emotions.

it was just sometimes he allowed these emotions to crawl their way up and who was he to deny them access after all, he knew you were his, he just had a tendency to enjoy letting others know what should be clear too.

general taglist → @atsumuwoah @bloody-bella @bbymilkbread @miracleboy420 @doggonudezz @tsumue @peteunderoos @tsukkisbean @saturnfarie @dear-kozume @zumisace @boosyboo9206 @totorosleaff @27kei @dai-tsukki-desu @crescenttooru @dearestmegumi @kuxredere @warakou @iss6s @lovinnoya @sophiashortcake @wompwomphq @waitforitillwritemywayout @webworld @brokeasshoee @sunasbabie @rowley-with-ackerman @mjoork @trifliz @curiouslilbeast @ineedsomefoodpls @hp-hogwartsexpress @ghostexhibit @kenmacorps @vhskenma @lollypop-lam @cultsumu

[cheeriecherry]

Ty for answering that -w- I wanted to make sure of your comfort zones before I asked this. What are your HC for when some of our favorite UA teachers realize they have a thing for a student (who they may or may not have realized have a crush on them back)

Ofc! I should make an official list of thing I’m comfy writing/uncomfy writing <:3c

Anyhoo! I’m assuming our fav teachers are the same, but in case not, this post includes Aizawa, Yamada, and Yagi!

Warnings: Depictions of student x teacher! This is a work of fiction, and in no way represents how I feel about the matter irl. Please read at your own discretion. 

AIZAWA SHOUTA|ERASERHEAD

-He has an ‘oh fuck’ moment XD 

-At first you were just one of his most tolerable students; kind, hardworking, level headed. He sees a lot of potential in you, so he does his best to train you well.

-You have a habit of always wishing him a good afternoon when class is over and you’re headed out the door. He keeps a straight face, but deep down he finds it charming that you always take the time to say goodbye.

-Probably doesn’t realize how deep his feelings for you actually run until you’re older, maybe a second or third year. You come back to his classroom after summer break, and the moment you walk in the door, laughing with a few friends, his heart clenches in his chest. It fucks him up for the rest of the lesson.

-I think he’d let it stew for a while, anger and shame pressing at the back of his mind. Every day he sees you he falls deeper, whether you’re laughing and smiling with friends, or concentrating hard while studying, or even just meandering around the campus. Everything about you draws him in.

-He’d never act on his feelings, not while you’re a student. Besides the fact that he could lose his job if you got caught, he wouldn’t want to do anything that would jeopardize your future. He cares about you too much, and you’ve worked too hard to have it ruined.

-Until he notices you staring at him in class. The moment he catches your eye, you look away and pretend to be interested in something else, but that specific moment sticks out in his mind. It’s the first of many.

-Sometimes you fluster when you get caught looking at him, other times you’re so lost in thought that you don’t even realize he figured you out. It’s usually when you’re daydreaming that Aizawa gets a good look at you; pretty features, soft skin, cute lips wrapped around the end of your pencil as you think about him-

-The moment the bell sings and everyone starts leaving for the day, he beckons you over. Probably sprouts some kind of nonsense about how you’re distracted in class, and how you need to pay more attention or your grades will start to suffer. It’s complete bullshit, but coming from him it sounds serious.

-At least, it would to anyone else but you.

-You sit on the edge of his desk, leaning back casually and swinging your legs, and you look at him in a way that almost makes him feel like prey. 

- “If my grades suffer, you could always give me some extra credit~” you say with a coy smile.

He’s deadpan as always when he replies, “Your grades haven’t dipped. Not yet, at least. This is a warning, Y/N.”

You pout a little, and sigh. You’re obviously dejected about something, but he’s got no idea why you’d be sad about having good grades...

“Pity,” you mumble, “a private tutoring session could have been fun.”

-You slide off his desk and make your way towards the door, and only then does it click for him. You like him, the same way he likes you.

-He calls out to you right before you slide the door open, and motions you back over. You huff and do as he says, and move to sit back on his desk, but just as you’re getting settled, he reaches forward and pulls you into his lap. It feels a little awkward at first, while you squirm and get comfortable, but once you find a good seat it’s actually pretty comfortable.

-You’ve got an arm tossed over his shoulders, and you’re leaning against his chest with your face tucked up by his neck. He resists a shudder at the feeling of your warm breath against his skin, instead looping an arm around your waist to keep you steady.

- “You’ve been flirting with me,” he says, and it’s not a question.

He can feel a smile break out across your face, before your lips press tenderly against his throat. “I have been for the past eight months, but thanks for noticing.”

He deadpans and pinches your thigh gently, earning a muffled squeak from you, a noise he decides he likes very much.

-But the overall question looms over him. What to do now? He didn’t want to put your future at risk, not to simply sate his own desires. He loved you too much to do that to you.

- “We can’t do this,” he says, and he feels you freeze against him. “Not yet, at least.” He feels you relax.

“I figured as much,” you grumble, but there’s no malice in your tone. “I’m gonna wait for you, you know that, right? The moment I graduate, I’m jumping you. I see the way you look at me when you think no one’s watching; you want me just as much as I want you.”

-He doesn’t deny it, simply holds you tighter.

-You smile softly and take his face in your hands. “If it’s gonna be a while until we can do this again, then...a kiss for the road?”

-It’s sweet, and warm, and a little bit desperate. It’s been a long time since he’s had anyone with him like this, and you’re spectacularly warm and pliant. It’s not a kiss he’ll soon forget, and will only serve to make you both yearn for more, but it’s worth it to feel your lips against his.

-You keep things on the down low after that, sneaking conversations here and there and whenever you can. He gives you his phone number in case you ever need anything, but you mostly use it to send him cat memes and suggestive texts.

-He scolds you every single time, but you both know his heart isn’t in it.

-He takes you out on an official date not three days after your graduate.

YAMADA HIZASHI|PRESENT MIC

-Unlike Aizawa, he does not have an ‘oh fuck’ moment. His feelings for you culminate slowly, and he’s quite aware of them, just the same as he’s aware of your feelings.

-He notices your lingering glances, small smiles, and cheerful greetings whenever he’s around. You’re not obvious about it, not being more than friendly from everyone else’s point of view, but he’s perceptive, especially when it comes to people.

-A little piece of him hopes you get over your crush on him, so that he in turn could get over you too, but the big emotions part of his heart wants you to keep loving him in hopes that he might have you some day.

-He tries rationalizing it when he’s on his own, telling himself that he’s really not that much older than you, and that he’s seen larger age gaps, and that after you graduate you’ll just be another hero. He knows he shouldn’t be harboring such strong feelings for one of his students, which is why he doesn’t tell anyone, but he figures that as long as he doesn’t act on it then no one will get hurt.

-But it’s very hard. By the time you’re in your third year, you’re openly flirting with him. He doesn’t necessarily encourage it, but he doesn’t dissuade it either. If anyone ever questions him on the matter, he’ll say that he doesn’t want to hurt your feelings or embarrass you so it’s best to let you work through your feelings on your own.

-He absolutely plays favourites, though. He only calls on you in class when he knows you know the answer to something, and always offers helpful advice about your classes when he’s able to. Some of your classmates grumble about ‘special treatment’ but none of them take it any further than that.

-It all comes to a head one rainy afternoon when he finds you curled up under a tree, looking very, very sad. He hasn’t got anywhere to be, but even if he did, he’d still come over. You’re still his student, even on weekends, and he cares about you a lot.

-You’re surprised when the rain suddenly stops dripping on you, and you look up to find Yamada holding an umbrella over your head, while the rain starts to soak him. You scold him lightly, complaining that you’re already wet so it doesn’t matter if you don’t have an umbrella. He has none of it though, and offers a hand to you.

-He pulls you to your feet and carefully arranges the umbrella so you’re both under it, and after a couple beats of silence, he finally asks what’s got you looking so down.

-You fidget a little, chewing your lip in consideration and wringing your hands. But you’re almost a graduate, you tell yourself, so it shouldn’t matter now if he knows. You’re pretty certain he likes you back, anyways, but on the off chance he doesn’t, you can cope with a month or so of awkwardness.

-You sigh deeply, and explain to him that your classmates were teasing the shit out of your earlier, on a subject that is very near and dear to your heart. You’d had enough of their antics, so you’d left to dorms to get some fresh air, and it had started raining. You’d hoped to get some respite beneath a tree, to no avail.

-He looks you up and down quickly, just now fully realizing how soaked you were. Your clothes cling to your skin in a way he never sees you dress, and it’s a little unsettling how something so mundane gets his heart racing.

-But he pushes through, and rests a hand on your shoulder, going on about how other people’s opinions can hurt but ultimately don’t matter, and that it’s most important how you feel about yourself. He tells you that you’re deserving of kindness and respect, and praises you lightly for being his favourite student and a bright young hero.

-Less than two seconds after he finishes speaking, your lips are on his. Soft and damp, and your fingertips are cool against his jaw where you’re holding him, but he doesn’t mind. Not in the slightest. He drops the umbrella in lieu of gripping at your hips, pulling you flush against him so he can kiss you back.

-You stay there for a few moments, rain soaking further and further into your clothes as your lips mold and slide against each other. He has half a mind to push you back against the nearest surface and deepen the kiss, but he remember that you’re still in public, and you’re still his student.

-He pulls away slowly, grinning inwardly when he sees how breathless and hazy you are. He presses one last kiss against your nose, before he’s grabbing the umbrella off the ground and tugging you along. 

- “That can’t happen again,” he tells you, “Not while you’re still a student here. Okay?”

You begrudgingly agree, even though you know it’s for the best. you really do love him, and you don’t want him to lose his job -or worse- over something like this.

“Understood,” you mumble sadly. “I’ll try to get over it, and I’ll stop flirting with you in class.”

-He tilts his head slightly, a questioning gesture, and gently laces his fingers with yours. Just once, out here in the rain, where no one can see.

“I said ‘while you’re a student’,” his tone is playful. “Sweetheart, the moment you graduate, I’m wining and dining you like it’s nobody’s business.”

-Your heart soars after that, and your anticipation for what’s to come makes your last month of school -and your friends’ teasing- more bearable. That, and the fact that you get to text him whenever you feel like, and how your sweet private conversations. He chides you when you get too lewd about something, either in your words or in photos you send him, and tells you to be patient.

-By the time you graduate, you’re just about ready to say fuck it and dive on him, but he beats you to the punch. After the official ceremony, he scoops you up and spins you around a couple times, asking you how it feels to be an official hero.

-You simply kiss him.

YAGI TOSHINORI|ALL MIGHT

-Most concerned out of the bunch. He’s got one hell of an image to uphold, and he never wants to put any of his students in harms way. He probably notices really early on the way his heart flutters around you, the way his stomach twists up in knots when he hears you laugh, the way it’s hard to breathe when he watches you train. Ngl, it scares him a bit.

-Having feelings like that is one thing, but having feelings like that for a student? That’s got bad news written all over it. And it’s especially bad when he realizes you don’t treat him like you do your other teachers; you’re kinder, softer, more interested in lessons.

-Sure, you could just think he was a good teacher, but he’s had many a people crushing on him over the years, so he knows the signs. You like him.

-He hides himself away from you at first, keeping you at an arms length, a curt distance, a professional ways away. He realizes that he may be coming off a little harshly towards you, often keeping any one on one time to a minimum and overlooking you in class.

-You thought he felt bad for liking you? Look how shitty he feels when he realizes he’s made you sad. The day you seek him out after class and ask him why he dislikes you so much, it feels like someone has stepped on his heart and ground it into the pavement with their heel.

-The way you hold yourself to appear smaller and less threatening, the way you avoid his gaze like you’re afraid of his judgement. He decides then and there to be honest with you. You’re almost done your second year in school, so you’re a little more mature, a little more capable of handling what he has to tell you.

-And tell you he does. He explains the way you make him happy, how he enjoys your company, how your smile warms his heart. He also tells you about the guilt he feels for looking at a student in such a way, and how he wouldn’t be offended if you never wanted to speak with him again.

-You, of course, have not been subtle about your feelings towards him. Strange as the situation is, it’s comforting to know he thinks of you the same way. You take his hand gently, marveling a little at how it dwarfs yours, and assure him that you don’t think less of him, even if he thinks you should.

-You can tell that he’s genuine and serious about having feelings for you. You’d never want to put him at risk for anything, so you quietly ask him if he’d be willing to wait for you, until you graduate. After that, you’ll no longer be his student, there’ll no longer be any risk associated with your relationship, and you can be together.

-He’s got his reservations still, but you talk about it more throughout the months, convincing him by the beginning of your third year to pursue something more after you finish school. Once that’s decided, he finds it difficult to keep you at an appropriate distance, but he does his best. From time to time he’ll keep you after class to ask how things are going, how you’re doing, etc. almost always ending with a gentle kiss on the forehead.

-From the outside, it looks like you’ve patched up whatever hole was formed between you, with only the two of you sharing knowing and longing glances across the room. He tutors you and gives you extra lessons when he’s able to, wanting to make sure you come out of this with as much skill as possible.

-The year is long and every day is more difficult that the last, but the weekend after you graduate, the two of you are curled up on his couch watching a movie after eating dinner, sharing sweet kisses and basking in each other’s presence.