#this isnt happy. not in the slightest.

[fearforthestorm]

i'm having a weird day and a lot of weird feelings about church stuff (read: being raised mormon and leaving and watching everyone I care about stay) so i'm gonna talk about it a little bit under the cut ↓

i'm in my 20s. my immediate younger sister (who was probably the one I was the closest to) turns 19 in september. she's leaving for her mission at the end of october. one of her friends, who was one of my closest friends at church because the two of us were the only queer people in young womens, had her farewell talk last sunday and is having an open house tonight before she leaves.

it's going to be a year and a half before I see my friend again and I'm scared to death that the person who comes back won't be the same person I cared about. I'm scared that the person she is after that and the person I'll be after that won't have anything to share anymore. and it's even more terrifying to think about that with my sister. there's already so much distance between us but I love her and I want her to have a place in my life no matter what our differences are. I just don't know if I can pretend hard enough for it to bridge that distance.

I don't think I'm ever going to be the kind of exmo who tries to send people "proof" that their church is false and evil. that's cruel, and it provably doesn't work, and quite honestly, leaving the church hurts really bad and I don't want the people I care about to have go through the utter fucking devastation and loss that is a faithbreak. but staying doesn't hurt less. staying means continuing to comply with and believe in cruel and bigoted values and contribute to a culture of sameness. staying means denying queer people and people of color and disabled people the right to exist without assimilation, denying the validity of cultures and traditions that dare to exist outside of the white christian american way of life.

it's scary. it's scary and painful and I know I have said before that the only thing harder than leaving is watching the people who you love stay. you can't drag them out and you can't go back. you just have to pretend hard enough to bridge the gap until it stretches too far. and either you lose them or they lose everything. there is no win condition. there is no happy ending. no eternal glory, no taking back the hurt and the anger and the grief. i wish to god (the god I don't believe in, the god whose name is pencilled across everything broken in my life) that there was.

[feintenstein]

What if everything was good and they were happy,, ook?

[that-seems-stupid-lets-do-it]

amiau

because i got her.. she is real and this thing has cat ears !! also why not. im able to draw anything i want

[razberrypuck]

I NEED everyone to understand that gangle's masks don't control her emotions. I need everyone to understand that she is literally masking her emotions and not having her comedy mask only limits her ability to do so. she's seemingly capable of feeling and expressing happiness without her comedy mask -- just like every other emotion -- she's just. not a very happy person.

[socksandbuttons]

all the other dimensions with evil lunar, lord lunar, lord eclipse-

to unpack that all and with what we have right now.

the brain is turning

[dreamwinged]

every single day i have at least one episode of remembering something i don’t want to remember at all and it’s just like hhhhh. more exhausting and upsetting than i have words to express. either trying to hold myself together in a public place or trying to shut it all out when i’m at home……. it’s just the worst either way

[emrys-rusts]

Gosh I wish I could just move out for my own health's sake.

[hecksupremechips]

Hypothetically should I play p3 reload with the femc mod like does anyone know if it’s good? It certainly LOOKS good but I wanna know if it’s essentially just portable with good visuals or if it’s reload but with kotone instead cuz if it’s the latter I am not interested

[menlove]

blorbo.... smol bean...... it has the same energy. i won't be expanding

[mo-ok]

the fucking konjac

[boomingsmile]

who gave sharp the audacity to be so kind, loving, sweetest person. D:< no amount of words i can put up will ever be able to contain the vibe he has; i desperately need a drink with him and i dont even drink and he doesn't even exist!

[pirateborn-a]

✧.    headcanon.

     Roger is very happy-go-lucky kind of character, but like the sea, he can and will become murderous at a moments notice. If someone he loves is hurt, he will retaliate with full blood-lust and sadism. His resilience, haki, and strength in combination with his rage makes him near unstoppable. It’s where most of his darker rumors and infamy were born from, and without the record of reason behind his actions, it’s natural for the public to develop an image of him that clashes with his reality.

     And he doesn’t care for any of it. As long as people understand that those who he claims as his own were not to be touched, he’s fine with however people come to think of it. He’s a man who would do anything for love, and that’s all he ever truly needed.

[knightzp]

LEOOOOOO 🥺🥺🥺

[midnightwriter21]

demon slayer hcs: the hashira men having a demon!SO that’s immune to sunlight pt.1

characters: fem!reader x rengoku, giyuu

PT 2 with Sanemi HERE

AN: the long awaited request is finally here!! sorry for the delay! im in college and finals week was crazy! but the semester is over and i'm ready to get back to it with a bunch of new content for you guys! <3

RENGOKU

when he comes home from a mission to find the house completely trashed and a trail of blood leading to the bedroom he freezes

his first thought is that you're dead

someone or something has broken in

and he wasn't here to protect you

immediately blames himself

and poor kyo just can't force himself to walk in the bedroom only to discover your broken bleeding body

his heart couldn't take it

its not until he hears movement and small noises of pain that he pushes the bedroom door open

only to discover you hiding in the corner of the room covered with a blanket

relief

until he pulls the blanket from your head to see what you've turned into

he doesn't react

doesn't talk

doesn't move

doesn't even breathe

just stares at you

until you manage to croak out his name

this snaps his mind into high gear

immediately thoughts of the young Kamado girl are running through his head

she has never hurt a human and seems to do just fine

and if you were going to harm him you would have done it already

quickly pulls you into his arms, making sure to avoid the sunlight peaking through the curtains and carries you to the bed to set you down

scribbles a note to the head of the corps to inform him of your condition

and spends the rest of the day and that night comforting and reassuring you because of what had to have been a traumatic night

a week or so passes

you fall back into your old routine of caring for the house

and its quite obvious that you're becoming depressed

no longer able to enjoy the warmth of the sun and being cooped up in the house for your own safety

it isnt until a young man wearing the head of a boar bursts headfirst through the window

breaking the glass, ripping down the curtains

with a "comin through!"

that you realize the sunlight doesn't harm you like it does to other demons

leave it to inosuke lmao

when kyo returns home from another mission around noon

imagine his surprise when his demon SO bursts through the front door into the sun

and into his arms

takes a minute for him to process that you're not burning up

"oh my god we have to get you inside NOW"

the poor man is having a heartattack

but then he sees your smile and hears your laugh for the first time since the attack

finally he's able to realize that the sun has no effect on you

and he's picking you up and swinging you around in a giant hug

i just know he gives the best hugs

i'd let him crush me to death in one

of course kyo is still sometimes crushed with guilt

he blames himself for your transformation in the first place

but the most important thing is that you're safe and happy again

GIYUU

why can't this man ever just be happy

when you don't show up at your usual meeting place with Giyuu in between missions he knows somethings up

he rushes to your home

and there you are

sitting on the steps in front of your house

covered in blood and in tears

it isn't until he gets closer that he realizes what has happened

he has no words

everyone that giyuu has ever loved has been taken from him

and he allowed himself to love you

thats why this has happened

blames himself even though it obviously not his fault

still not speaking he looks at the sky to see the sun

and then back at you

a demon

who isn't affected by the sunlight in the slightest

and isn't attacking him

and then he disappears

when he returns several hours later it's dark outside

and with him he's brought Shinobu and the Kamado siblings

one of which is a demon

Shinobu checks you over and determines that the blood you are covered in is indeed yours

but any wounds you had have already healed

Nezuko senses what you are but seems to know that you're docile and snuggles up to your side as a comfort

and Giyuu just watches quietly

when Nezuko has fallen asleep her brother picks her up giving you a sad smile before he leaves

Giyuu helps you stand and brings you inside

he runs a bath so you can clean urself off

and goes about cleaning the house which was destroyed during your attack

it isn't until you're in bed that Giyuu lays behind you, tugs you close to him, and speaks to you for the first time

"i am staying with you. and i WILL turn you back."

and those two sentences bring you all the comfort in the world

[transfaguette]

this might be insensitive but I really envy transmascs as a transfem, it seems so easy for transmascs to pass since the effects of testosterone are permanent for transfemmes and it sucks how my voice will be deep forever and i feel so ugly

the thing is, the effects of estrogen are permanent for us, too. i will always have boobs unless i get them surgically removed. i will always be 5’3. I will always have wide hips. etc. these are the things that make *me* feel ugly, and like I will forever be seen as a freak. it is absolutely not easier for trans men to pass, i literally have facial hair and I do not pass. people who have been on testosterone for years sometimes don’t pass. but heres the thing that is true for the both of us: we can and will find happiness, love and acceptance. And, we can both do things, including HRT, to transform our bodies into something we love. if it really seems that much easier on our side, im sorry to say you just dont know that many people on testosterone. its as simple as that. So please, focus on what you can do to make yourself happier, I know trans women who have transitioned so gracefully, it isnt an impossibility in the slightest. I know you are hurting, but it is possible.

[vampirenigh]

i hope this isnt weird or too specific--- (ignore this if u dont wanna do it!!)

i was hoping you could write about ciel and alois (blck btlr) with a very dreamy s/o? like, dreamy in so many aspects. like they look like they jumped out of a painting in a museum, or they could look identical to some figures they've seen in paintings. and their voice would be very calming too, quiet but clear iygwim.... like s/o is basically angelic and all that and their presence feels surreal to the boys

gn! reader if that's fine:DD

You are my everything

Hey. No problem at all. It's totally fine and thank you for your ask. I like when people send me specific asks because it helps me understand better and not mess up. At first I didn't understand what you meant by dreamy but because of your explication I think I got it. I will try to do gn but I never tried so if something is not right don't hesitate to tell me. And if you have any more ideas don't hesitate to send an ask.😁

Summary: Ciel and Alois whit a dreamy reader.

Characters: Ciel Phantomhive, Alois Trancy.

Warnings: gn!reader, some posesiveness in Alois?

Masterlist

Ciel Phantomhive

He first saw you in town. He was with Sebastian to take some things and investigate a new case given by the queen. But the care was totally forgotten when he saw you. You were the most beautiful person he has ever seen. He knew that you are from an aristocratic family from your clothes and your maid but didn't know which one.

So he puts Sebastian to do some research on you and he learns that you were Elisabeth's cousin. He couldn't believe it. Even more when he first talked to you at Elisabeth's birthday party. You were just so calm and welcoming that he felt safe in your presence. Your quiet but clear voice made him feel like he could tell you everything and you wouldn't judge him.

And because of that he broke the engagement with Lizzy and started to court you. Elizabeth's mother was a bit mad but couldn't stop Ciel because he loves him as her own son and he deserves to have happy memories.

So you two start to date after some time whit a new engagement made between Ciel's family and your's. He started to call you often at his mansion and talk to you. He could've sworn that you were an angel from heaven when you first comforted him after he had a nightmare and you stayed at his mansion overnight. You were so gentle with him like he was made of glass and would break at the slightest touch. It was such a different feeling that he felt he doesn't deserve it.

All this time he thought that the only thing that counts is to revenge his family and to reestablish his family name but now he starts to doubt it. The only thing that he can think of is that he doesn't want to lose you ever like he lost everyone else. He will protect you whit his life and will make sure that you are always comfortable.

God forgive anyone that hurts or embarrasses you because Sebastian will take care of him.

Ciel would often come to you to talk about what is bothering him and would be grateful for who you are that he sends you different dresses and jewelry that he knows will look good on you.

In conclusion he will love and cherish you till the day he dies and will always be grateful for your presence even in the darkest times.

Alois Trancy

He saw you in a museum in the art section. He couldn't believe how much you looked alike whit a portrait of a very beautiful women that lived over 200 years ago. He couldn't take his eyes of you so he made a move. He came to you and introduced himself in the hope that you will see him as fascinating as he sees you. And you did. You introduced yourself and engaged in a conversation whit Alois.

Your voice and your looks made him not want to leave you alone at all. He feelt like he is talking to an angel who came to safe him. He learned that you are the grand grand granddaughter of the woman in the painting and that she was one of the most beautiful women that lived in that time and that you are happy that you could resemble her.

He started to court you and made the engagement whit your parents. He asks Hannah some things that you would like and if you don't he will punish her severely.

He will eventually tell you everything about his past and about Claude. He feels so safe with you that he couldn't bring himself to hide it. And the moment when you just tell him that it doesn't matter, it doesn't define him he swore he could die right then and there as a happy boy.

He would tell Claude to protect you and to kill anyone who comes too close to you whit bad intentions.

He would be very clingy. He doesn't like being away from you. He feels like you are his lifeline and can't leave you.

Do you remember the time when Alois was on his knees in front of Claude to prevent him of leaving? He would do that when you wanted to go have some tea time whit another girl. (What can I say he has abandonament issues.)

He feels that he is the luckiest boy on the planet because he can have such a beautiful and calm lover who sees him for who he is and not for his money.