#this isnt even a lb this is just my life now

[leafatlaw]

you guys will never believe which characters i am hyperfixationing on in show (its the fucking sibling duo again oh my god i hate it her-

[kcrossvine-art]

hi birds of paradise and of prey! I sincerely hope your 2024 has been kind to you so far, and if it hasn't, I hope it starts being fucking nicer soon. We got eyes on it and are ready to take it out should it fail.

I'm coming to the end of my list here soon, so if anyone has ideas on what they'd like to see next, please do hit me up! Even if its just a piece of media with interesting food in it and not a specific dish you wanna see. My roommate got me a recipe book from that TikTok fantasy tavern guy, "recipes from the lucky gryphon"? So we could also take a shot at a few of those, although im not really familiar with his work. Regardless-

We will be making Stuffed Cabbage from Lord of the Rings Online today!

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes in to this Stuffed Cabbage?” YOU MIGHT ASKYou cant kinda put whatever you want for seasonings and even the meat filling. I used ground beef but pork and lamb are also stellar candidates.

Yellow onion

Garlic

2 eggs

Ground beef

Rice

A head of cabbage

Oregano

Thyme

Red pepper flakes

Cumin

Crushed tomato

Tomato sauce

AND, “what does this Stuffed Cabbage taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASKBa bawsa

Very, very filling wow

2 rolls filled me up for a meal and i made about 20-ish from one head of cabage

A bit plain tbh, the texture is great but I'd really double up on the seasonings

A blank canvas for you to impart your spice preferences onto

Reheating makes it taste almost identical to fresh

Would pair well with a hot sauce dip

could also go well with an artichoke dip

If you run out of room and need to layer the rolls, I'd try experimenting with pouring some of the crushed tomato and sauce inbetween the stacked rolls. Otherwise the ones at the bottom lack a lot of the tomato flavor. However it might make the bottoms on the rolls laying ontop soggy?

. Where rice called for, used long grain white rice

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I've never blanched anything before. Theres not much western food that calls for it, meanwhile whenever my friend from malaysia shows a dish they ate, 9 times out of 10 the vegetables are blanched. Much easier process than the fancy name might suggest- boil water and dunk the thing in until its done. Whatever 'done' may be for the thing you are cooking.

Also for the ground beef (or whichever meat you use) you don't have to cook it beforehand, but in doing two tries at making these cabbage rolls i would recommend you at least season your meat before mixing it with everything else. The meat will cook to a safe temperature inside the cabbage rolls, i just prefer the taste and texture of it when cooked twice.

I give this recipe a meandering 7/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) I want to review more horrible recipes, truly i do, so that the rating scale isnt always a 6 and above, but whenever i try something horrible its like "why the fuck would i put all the effort into making and sharing a review of this thing i Do Not Want others to eat????" yknow?? Would people be interested in roasting horrible recipes? 

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Ingredients:

1 yellow onion

6 cloves of garlic

2 eggs

2 lbs ground beef

1 1/2 cup cooked rice

1 large head of cabbage

28oz crushed tomato

14oz tomato sauce

Oregano

Thyme

Red pepper flakes

Cumin

Salt/pepper

Method:

Saute garlic and onion in butter over medium heat until onions are caramelized. When done, remove from heat and let cool.

Season the beef to your liking with cumin, red pepper, and salt. Very, very lightly cook the beef in the same pan used for the garlic and onions. Cook until it starts to brown, but dont let it darken. 

Beat eggs thoroughly with oregano, thyme, salt, and pepper.

Add all of the above ingredients together in a bowl with (cooked!) rice. Mix thoroughly then cover and let rest in the fridge.

Core and blanche your cabbage in boiling water, peeling them off as they become limp.

Once you've separated all the leaves, cut off any thick stems that would prevent the leaf from folding.

Put roughly 2 tablespoons of meat filling into each leaf. Fold the sides of the leaf inwards and roll it up. Place each cabbage roll seam-down into a casserole dish.

If they don't all fit in one layer, its more than okay to stack. Try not to stack more than 2 layers though.

Once you've used all the cabbage, take your can of tomatos and pour them over the rolls. Mix some oregano into the tomato sauce and pour that over the rolls as well.

Bake uncovered in the oven at 350 for about 2 hours. Dont worry if a bit of tomato on top looks burnt.

IF REHEATING LEFTOVERS: Bake 10 cabbage rolls in the oven at 320 for about 40 minutes. Reduce time for less rolls.

[achoshistor]

episode ignis

main + up to ch3v2 SPOILERS also TMI

i nearly pissed my pants when finishing this like 5 times because of ardyn bro FUCK ARDYN (hes HOMOPHOBIC). honestly i lowkey did that too when playing the main game but that was because of the jumpscares. then after that i got even more pissed off on tabata's behalf (note i have yet to finish the other 3 dlc) cause like yeah you see the guys in the main story but this like fleshed out ignis so much. u really cant tell just *how* (how to do italics??) much ignis cares for noct and is willing to not just put his life on the line but to totally lose it in order to protect him. afaik (or assume) iggy is probably closest to noct out of the bros (again assuming from brotherhood n the opening scene) and he had pretty much just been always hanging around (key to his apartment) noct. we get to see all that from iggy's perspective (literally at times) which the main game was very much missing and this was practically supplemental materials to the course that is ffxv. alas they killed off tabata and now we have nothing to see. i cant really comment on ardyn & im still weighing my options for the novel (i hate spending money but i hate buying licenses more) but it seems that something regarding bahamut comes up (more soon). like honestly this is lowkey as a whole but anything under tabatas command has this melancholy to it that we will probably never see the of light again and i think this verse 2 is yet another example of what could have been but wasnt due to the workplace opps. moral of the story is there are always jealous losers after you, but when they think they've won they've just sent a bunch of other people after themselves...

anyways i think thats enough regarding the story. i want to comment on iggy himself. i found it really funny that even with his glasses off he could see clearly (why even wear them especially because he literally looks fine without them) with apparently enough that he could fight ardyn. lowkey though this guy is like one of those "fashion mfs" (i have tik tok brainrot) like bro you could see his collar sparkling in the sun as well as his belt?? on top of that his shirt is leopard print (as well as the roen skull) and the necklace like wtf... this guy is an inspiration. i really like the implication that he does his hair every morning without fail and tbf i think aside from the dlc whenever the rest of the bros get dirty ignis is somehow the cleanest (except in those crestholm channels) as well as the fact that he remains clean shaven through those 10 years. i need to be like him STAT. wonyoungism more like ignisism...

combat wise i feel like theres that slowness again but its not just with ignis; with gladio sure its expected and it took time to get used to it with noct but noct's warping abilities make up for it. this isnt a big deal tbh just a little annoying especially with how (at least for me) lt will dodge and lb would have "warped" but otherwise gameplay here is pretty simple too. honestly even with that like the fact that ravus and even aranea never became playable is a loss bc iggy n ravus synergize pretty well. whatever no point in focusing on what could have been. instead we have to focus on what will be (i filled out the square enix ff survey with a wish for more ffxv... if more people do it perhaps they will hear our pleas...) please i need more of my beautiful king ignis.........

ok thanks for coming to my ted talk more to come once i finish the other three dlcs

[dietcokeandoats]

tw more intense personal ed rant than usually on my blog!

okay so if im being honest after “recovering” and coming back i do not in long term reality want to be lower than 105 lbs (19.8). i find pics of people at lower bmis soooooo appealing but when i was bmi 17 even though i loooved my legs and stomach my face looked so creepy and weird and my (already) huge ribcage stuck out not in a good way (completely a me thing)

and everyone around me was so fragile w me and i gave my bf a fucking ulcer from stress. almost lost him. health was fucking horrible and i was hospitalized so no id rather not. 105-108 is a weight i could live my whole life at and not be miserable or look 12. i dont actually want to die.

but like the horrible asshole part of my brain is like bmi 19.8 isnt low enough. its not even close to 19. and you were 17 once. so why stop (lmao at me saying this bc im sooo far away from even 105 now and i cant restrict lower than 700 cals but hey)

like it is literally a numbers and competition game. i dont even want to look 92 or lower, really. idk its just weird. before i got to my lw everything was about an appearance and a self pride i had worked for for so long. and sometimes it still is but this feeling is newer idk

i need to be stop posting 🤫

[richardsphere]

Daddycop Reaction

BIAS DISCLAIMER: Ok so im going into this episode in a slight state of agitation. Cause i just finished Werepapa's which was explicitly about Adriens right to self-determination. Had his girlfriend explicitly murder him in a way that further devalues the value of his life in the narrative (cause he isnt even in the scene he gets murdered in. He doesnt even get to know his girlfriend is completely able to just kill him) and failed to have him either break free of his literal prison, or decide for himself that Nathalie was his mom and Paris was his home (as those decisions were made by Marinette instead of him) Basically: Im coming into this episode knowing that its gonna focus on making Sabrina the best girl ever (possibly even show her shrugging off Lila's akuma) so it can redeem her from the Chloe-days and justify making her a member of the Herosquad. And i come in knowing that its most lilkely gonna shove Chat under the bus to accomplish her cool-ness. Im coming into this episode with some degree of bias against this episode cause every episode in the season so far has been mistreating adrien and has romanticising the hell out of the mistreatment. On the one hand having an episode that wont textually be about mari's relationship with Adrien will hopefully be a relief. As at least any mistreatment is unlikely to be romanticised or whitewashed with a "but i did it out of love". ---

Ok so i love the little "you'd tell me if something was wrong" scene from Roger.

oh no... Marinette is an Astrology-girl now. Also the idea of counting your kisses is weird right?

you know what, as weird as this set-up is. I am thankfull for the "special authorisation and I got a professional firemarshal to do it" line. Dont try this shit at home (or at least without a permit) sort of deal.

Ok i like sabrina's decision to help here. Its a nice little moment and it emphasises the "permanent heroes can willingly do small volunteer stuff without Ladybug being a controllfreak" thing. I'm actually starting to somewhat buy the idea that the heroes are now being trusted with their powers, rather then merely entrusted with their safekeeping. (which is a meaningfull distinction, though it might not sound like it)

So i rewatched that scene a second time just to be sure, Sabrina just jumped that building didnt she? then why does LB always bother with the yoyo-pull and cat with the baton-grow-push when they can just jump onto the roofs. Like im definitly being a pedant, but that feels like a minor inconcistency. They wanted her to be able to do the same things LB and CN did, and realised a throwing ball isnt a usefull tool in this instance and just made it a jump. Le Chat Noir Caberet-poster as an easter egg. Cute. (looks old enough im betting its public domain, but even if it weren't that'd definitly be licensing money well spent) --- I feel sorry for Sabrina that Mari left. But on the other hand, if i were in this situation, without Sabrina explicitly saying she was gonna come back and that I should wait for her... i'd probably thank her for taking 1 problem of my plate and fix the other problem myself. (does open some questions about how i'd figure out which garage my Hypothetimobile is at now though cause the repairman needs to be paid and i assume Sabrina isnt doing that out of her own pocket) --- Nice to see the girls hang out together. Some notable redesigns: Zoe has SS-Harley Quinn-hair. I dont like it (it feels like it's invoking a character way more vibrant and wacky then Zoe is, and also from a way darker incarnation of said character then ML would ever tangle with) Rose's eyeblush... its fine when she's shot from the waist-up close-on. I was honestly really worried when i saw her in the intro cause it looks offputting there. Milene, i like the wacky and i do not miss the faux-dreads. They you feel a lot less "60's interpretation of a hippie anachronism" and a lot more modern now. Kagami is carefully bland as always. (that isnt an insult, she is deliberately designed to look like a focus-group tested thing cause it ties to her story) not much to say about the rest. --- Zoe reaches out. Its nice to see someone besides Marinette get to be one reaching out. (both in that it undercuts marinette's perfect-sainthood and in that having it be the one character that didnt suffer under Chlobrina reduces the "remember to fix your bullies"-ness) Adrien cancels the date because he's a voice of reason, meanwhile Marinette un-cancels the date cause's she's the voice of obsession.

I like their hesitance. Oh for a second i thought it was gonna be "favour for a favour", like some kind of "you forgive Sabrina, you get to keep your boyfriend"-thing they were gonna do. (which i would have loathed). But Zoe thinks Mari somehow picked up on the question she wanted to ask, and everyone else thinks that Zoe told Mari her on the gardenpath and is trying to convince them cause Zoe convinced her. Its actually a rare case of a credible misunderstanding. and unlike most misunderstandings in this show, it manages to be cute rather then cringe-inducing. Adrien shoots down Mari again, cause he's still the voice of reason. Mari weirded out by the Sabrina hug. The use of the siren on the car is definitly unlawfull. but we're clearly playing it for cuteness/parental caring, and it works.

i shudder to believe it. this episode is actually well constructed and seems to be genuinely respectfull to all parties involved...

---

Why are there leaves inside mari's room? cute party-prep scene, Alya spots the thread that something is way off about the decorations. "this is a DISASTER" right in Sabrina's face...we're back to the cringe.. --- Onto the Sab-kuma scene. I dont know how to feel. On the one hand, Sabrina was the character that originally got done so dirty that she not only didnt have an akumatised design (invisibility powers) but didnt even have an on-screen akumitisation (Vanisher starts in-medias-res). And Miraculer was more focussed on Chloe then Sabrina. So i think that cheating her out of a shot at a cool-ass villain design feels like we're once more making her unimportant. On the other, having her resist the akuma is a good way to signal her redemption. but then, the fact that a side-character like Sabrina can now snap out of akuma's, while Adrien's been akumatised twice with no ability to resist feels like Adrien is catching a bit of a stray bullet here. Also catching a stray bullet? Lila now feel like a less credible threat. It took Gabriel seasons to have an akuma resisted, this is lila's fourth or fifth episode and she's already getting no-selled by a sidecharacter. And while his akuma's didnt threaten to go stray until Markov and Gigantitan, Lila's threatens to go stray in ilustrhater. The show is outright failing at making her the "worse hawkmoth". In the end. I think that her inclusion into the friendgroup could have worked without her resisting the akuma instantly. Maybe akumatise her, but have her realise mid-akuma that she doesnt want to hurt them and de-akumatise herself? or just big post-akuma party. I think they could've made both of those work without de-valuing the concept of akumatisation as a threat. --- PIDGEONMAN! HE LIVES! we have missed you pidgeonman.

oh no... did they seriously just. "I love being a distraction", given and said plain-voice. They're really trying to respond to backlash against adrien's constant under-utilisation as nothing but a disposable meatshield by having him verbally state (non-sarcastically) that he loves it. Like it'd be one thing if he just said "on it", or some generall aquiescence to her plan, but this feels like a forced inclusion to placate the audience. "see, we wrote him to be fine with his constant misuse and lack of inclusion into the plans. He said so himself in a single throwaway line". --- See its scenes like this that made me hate the Volunteer line. (which as an aside. I need to state, i dont dislike what they were trying. putting an explicit anti-authority "cops IRL only exist to protect the rich" message into your childrens superhero show is always gonna be clunky, and I apreciate the attempt. They needed to respond to Bob somehow.) I get this is meant to be Marinette supporting Sabrina against her insecurities, but combined with the (i think its 3 counting NY) times that she's Vetoed Cat's retirement, and the way she sidestepped Alya's refusals in the past... it creates a subtext that makes her seem like she doesnt know what the word "NO" means. --- Wait... Bark goes from Choker/Dogleash to a button on her ribbon? That feels less like "camouflage form" then it feels like its shifting into a different accesory alltogether. And we're off to the garage (didnt expect it to make a return in the episode. Also i feel like the show used to put more effort into making the heroes struggle to find out which object they're after. Like Mari sees this and just insta-jumps to the conclusion its the car with no real proof.)

im gonna admit i dont understand refering to people by their current suits. Its one thing to refer to the suits by name, but refering to the person by the suit-name when its not their default will always feel weird.

so... why did we go to the garage if we were just portal+cataclysming this. We could've cataclysmed it anywhere. And when did Sabrina realise that Mari needed voyage specifically. There was no alusion to the horse. --- "your new look is awesome" no it isnt. Remember how i said Milene feels less like a 60's anachronism now? This look is more anachronistic then her previous look and feels like a 70's-era TV nerd character. Her old design (partly due to the tips she must've gotten from Chloe) looked more confidant then this one. I think its the hair, her old straightened hair seemed artificial, but artificial in that "i take care of myself" way. This is more natural, but in a "im so certain im gonna look bad, why even bother" sort of way.

Especially that all the other girls at the lunch-table (sans kagami) have redesigns featuring some pretty blatantly dyed bits of hair? her old design with the flawless-straight would've fit into her new clique more then her new design does.

--- Zoe bullying scene. I dont like the Cockroach thing... it channels alternate universe marinette.

[thelarsvolta96]

post about life lately

this is gonna be a long one so buckle up i guess. just wanted to explain why ive been gone and rarely active lately.

so ive been in and out of the ER lately, my most recent stay being 5 days long, because ive been having severe digestion issues and pain to the point where i couldnt eat or drink anything because it would just come right back up. my mental health has been down the fuckin drain lately as well. and i have no funds or health insurance to get help with any of this. thankfully before my ER visit i scheduled a mental health visit for tomorrow, which i totally forgot about until they emailed me asking for paperwork. but my follow up for my physical health isnt until october 3rd, and thats just to establish care, i doubt ill get any answers there. in the meantime ive lost 20 lbs without meaning to or trying, just because i cant eat very much at all. im somewhat convinced that i cant eat beef or gluten at all, and any time i eat a leafy veggie or something like broccoli that causes me intense pain and discomfort as well. but i dont know. i need to get allergy testing done and whatever other testing they can do on me. they did an upper endoscopy on me at the hospital and said i had "minor gastritis" which is ridiculous because of course its gonna look minor when i havent eaten in a week. i havent even been aggravating it. i dont know what to do. for now im eating what little i can and conserving my energy. im just so lost. not to mention my mental health just constantly spiraling, im sure in part due to me not getting the nutrients i need and also because i just feel so sick constantly.

the drs at the ER kept saying they think its cannabinoid hyperemesis, which i think is pretty bullshit, but they say the symptoms can last up to 6 months after ur last use. so i guess im gonna be off the weed until the end of march to see if thats really whats causing all of this. im hoping ill get a different diagnosis from the drs im able to see, but i dont know if i will. i just have to play it safe. unfortunately, the weed was like the single best helper for my physical pain from just existing as well as for eating food, so my appetite is basically nonexistent at this point as it has been for well over a decade now, only now i have no way to stimulate it. so now im in constant pain, constantly tired, constantly feeling sick. its hell.

anyway, im trying to keep a list of trigger foods, and so far its been any beef, and ive had a hard time with saltine crackers and pretzels. ive eaten chicken and rice alright, i was even bad and ate some french fries with sauce the other day and that was ok. hence my thinking that gluten might be fucking with me. but i have no idea. im just so distraught. i want answers. i need to be able to live my life.

i guess thats pretty much everything. hopefully i wont disappear for a large length of time again. sorry everybody

[wuornosblog]

6-8-92

Dear Dawn, … suddenly [Arlene] changes her tune and wants me to now give Jackie a chance . . . Make her change the contract . . . So on recorded convo, all 3 of us on phone talking. We get the situation squared off. Armstrong and anyone else is out . . . Arlene . . . start[s] me recording via phone info for her movie. Nothing about crimes (.) Just childhood life First. After first trial. I am to give her info on Killings. So no killings are discussed. But (are) secretly to Arlene. And very vague in detail. Just to let her know . . . (why) I had to do it . . . No new contract is drawn up. That is perpitually stated over and over . . . A few months go by … And a Revelation none of us have known comes out of the dark. By Jackie finding out. Its the Investigators who had interviewed me for 3 hours when I confessed, and with tyria Jolene moore. (All are involved in a movie.) . . . 4 to 6 weeks “before” anyones arrest was even made. Of course tyria was working with them on how to get me to confess . . . tyria knows its “Selfdefense”. But has been offered [money] to make her change her knowledge of Self-defense and agree with the cops . . . And Jackie (now) almost has her screen play finnished. And suddenly (now) Arlene gets in an accident. one of her mares kick her in the back . . . She says she was “merasulously healed by God.” . . . myself now I don’t even believe she was in that hospital . . . Suddenly the guards start messing me. Falsifying DR reports. To get me in Solitary confinement. Which leaves me unable to contact Trisha. I am locked up for 6 months in Solitary . . . the officers are also trying again to Kill me since the visteril didnt work … I loose 45 lbs. They feed me food not even a dog, cat, or gator would eat . . They also harrass me heavy mentally … And want me to hang myself bad. One guard even through me a torn towel in my cell. And said enjoy yourself tonight . . . Isnt it ever dirty Dawn. 4-now Love Lee

[kcrossvine-art]

Heya folks n friends! Today on our LotR cooking series, we're going to be making something inspired by Mrs. Maggot, wife of Farmer Maggot. Originally we were going to do a cream of mushroom soup, but the idea of adding meat as a cheeky lil joke on their last names was too good to pass up. In my mind meat goes better with thin soups than creamy ones.

And thus Mrs. Maggots Meat 'N Mush Stew was born.

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes in to Mrs. Maggots Meat 'N Mush Stew?” YOU MIGHT ASKFor the stew portion itself we're going to be using a hearty base, aiming for a layering of flavors. If you feel comfortable making a roux, feel free to do so, but I did not due to energy levels and thus the flour in this recipe is only used for searing the meat before its added to the pot.

Cubed beef

Flour

Peanut oil

Beef stock

Dried porcini mushrooms

Carrots, chopped

Onion, diced

Garlic, crushed

Scallion, chopped

Bay leaf

Salt and pepper

Ground red pepper

Cumin

Zatarins gumbo file

For the other mushrooms, were going to cook them separate and throw them in at the end (but they'll have friends to keep them company!!).

Cremini mushrooms, sliced

Half an onion

Carrots

Garlic

Salt and pepper

Thyme

Olive oil

This took about 4 hours in total. If you have a slow cooker itd probably be easier to use that, but as is isn't too bad either. I mostly worked on commission stuff in the kitchen in-between stirring. "The best food is the one you don't have to make, the second best food is the one you don't have to think while making."

AND, “what does Mrs. Maggots Meat 'N Mush Stew taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASK

HOT HOT HOT

Tastes like walking from the cold into the cramped but cozy bar your friend works at

Meat was so tender and juicy, melts in your mouth. Makes you cry

It wanst actually carmelization but the onions had a hint of tasting caramelized

Mushrooms- a strong umami flavor with a bit of smokeyness

Once you get that Perfect level of gumbo file, it just makes every other element stick out more

Like an energy booster for the ingredients

A spotlight on the bay leaf, and oils, and spices

. If you don't want to use beef, feel free to use vegetable stock instead and replace the cubes with strips of king oyster mushrooms. Exclude the flour but still cook them in the pan. . this isnt officially part of the recipe since im not sure itd be 'on theme', but feel free to start your rice cooker around the 3 hour mark so you can have some hot rice ready for serving as filler.

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When I was looking through food and food mentions in LotR, Mrs.Maggot just stook out to me. 'Queen amongst farmers wives' is both really sweet and a fuckin killer description. What a legend. I wanted to do something based on her and our two options were either beer, bacon or raw mushrooms. Beer while very appealing is also not something you can whip up in a day, while raw mushrooms have a chance of killing my beloved readers. I don't want to talk about me and bacons sordid past.

And so as praise to this funky farmer women, may you add this stew to your collection of potpie, lasagna, and roast recipes.

Did i mention i started my first grease fire when making this? Yeah. Don't cover any empty greased pan even if your intent is to keep water from splashing into it.

Anyway, this recipe is a solid 10/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) The partner has already made me pledge to cook it again hehehe

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Ingredients:

2 lbs cubed beef

A little bit of flour to 'tumble' the meat in, in a bowl

Peanut oil to sear the beef, as needed

3 kilograms beef stock

28g dried porcini mushrooms

4 carrots, chopped

1 white onion, diced

4 cloves garlic, crushed

1 scallion branch, chopped

Salt and pepper to taste

Ground red pepper to taste

Cumin to taste

3 bay leafs

A pinch of Zatarins gumbo file

Ingredients… . . TWO:

1 lb cremini mushrooms

Half of a white onion, diced

1 carrot, chopped

2 cloves garlic, crushed

Salt, pepper, and thyme to taste

Olive oil as needed to pan-fry

Method:

Put the porcini mushrooms into a bowl, add enough warm water to cover. Give them roughly 20 minutes, or until softened and the waters turned color.

Cut the carrots, onion, and garlic.

Get a large pot with a lid, pour in your stock (or water and bouillon cubes). Pour in the porcinis and the mushroom water. Turn the burner to medium-high.

Add your bay leaves, carrots, onion, and garlic to the pot. Add extra salt if you'd like.

Tenderize and cut your beef into roughly 1 inch cubes.

In a small bowl, pour a handful of flour along with pepper, cumin, and ground red pepper. Mix until combined.

Lightly toss each cube of beef in the mixture, get a little coverage on each side.

Heat a frying pan to medium heat and add peanut oil. If using an electric stovetop it will take time to heat up.

Add some of your beef cubes to the pan, don't overcrowd it. Flip to check sides are a light brown with dark brown edges, its good for some pink/red to poke through.

Add beef cubes to the pot when done, careful of splashing.

Keep doing this in batches until all beef cubes are added. 

 Once the pot has reached a simmer, turn the heat down a few notches and cover.

Set a timer for 4 hours. Taste test every so often. Aim to stir the pot every 10-15 minutes.

(You can do steps 14-21 immediately or optionally wait a bit)

 Rinse and dry your cremini mushrooms.

Slice them vertically. Cut the carrots, onion, and garlic.

In a frying pan on medium-low heat, add olive oil, carrots, and onion. Keep the vegetables moving! When they start to change texture, add your cremini mushrooms.

Bring the pan up to medium heat. 

Once your mushrooms have cooked off the liquid inside, theyll start turning a deeper brown. Add the garlic. Keep! the! vegetables! Moving!

If the pan gets overcrowded, take some out and set it aside in a bowl. Smaller batches.

This process took roughly 15 minutes, but youll know its done once everything has a nice sear on it and the garlic is brown but not burnt. Add salt, pepper, and thyme to taste.

Set everything aside in a bowl.

Once the 4 hours are up the meat should be cooked all the way through and tender enough to pull apart. Strain the bay leaves out. Cut and add scallions. Add the bowl with cremini mushrooms.

Add a pinch of gumbo file to start, stir and taste test.

[fruit-in-the-blender]

hey! it’s been a while, how are you?? soo i have an issue and i need some help- this is a vent so pls feel free to skip but i j need advice haha

so my mom had to give me a med that was dosed by weight so she found out my weight (20 lbs lower than when i last told her) and she was like omg so proud of u!! and so today apparently she was telling my dad that i lost sm weight and it was so good- not in like a mean way bc almost everyone in my fam struggles w weight but none of them have eds (other than me lol) so she called me to ask how much i’ve lost and she told me that if i lost a little bit more it would be amazing and i am on the verge of crying bc i’ve plateaued now and im binging (if u have binge tips also pls help) and i feel like now that my parents know my weight they’re gonna keep asking (also im a poc so parents don’t rly get the whole ed stigma)

if you have any advice, do tell 💓

ohh man... i totally feel you... i'm really sorry that they're doing that... I know that the praise and "support" probably feels good but as someone who does know a bit about eds and has experienced it firsthand, try to separate yourself from it.. Losing a lot of weight from an ed isnt good,, even if they say that it is (bc im assuming they dont know about your ed)

As to prevent bingeing-- try and eat small meals throughout the day or even snacks that are high in protein and not fast acting sugars so that you're less likely to be super hungry and binge. Also I find that staying hydrated and focusing a lot on my water intake can be really helpful-

PLEASE keep taking care of yourself, I know how parents can be,,, and as a fellow poc I get that.. I'm hispanic and my family doesn't get it (I'm sure a lot of people can relate..) and always makes comments about my body and it can get really uncomfy and just make me want to continue letting this disorder control my life.

I hope that this was at least like a little bit helpful, but stay strong and be careful- <333

[fangirl1029]

Going home

 honestly I think there isnt enough sam love on here and he deserves it

Sam Uley x reader

you had grown up knowing all about the legends around the pack. This didn’t mean that you thought theyd be true and eventually change your life.Not only did you know about the legends but you knew everyone in la push.

You had come home from being away at college the last few years after hearing from Bella that your younger brother had been super sick ,not returning her calls and avoiding her as if she was the plague. The strange part was that your father hadn't bothered telling you that jacob had gotten so sick. 

Bella picked you up from the airport to take you home since you had gotten so wrapped up in trying to get home fast that you had forgotten to call your father to get someone to pick you up. Before you knew it to we're home and Bella had gotten out of her red truck and banged on your fathers door.  “ what the fuck Bella??” you said when she stormed in the house demanding to see Jacob. You hear Bella yelling at the top her lungs and run to the back yard to see her getting into.....Paul’s face or who you thought could be paul.

You hadnt seen anybody from home in such a long time and all the boys had their hair cut short, had grown  taller and added 20 lbs of muscle mass along with a tribal tattoo.”Bella what are you thinking pulling something like that?!” you yelled still running up to her and trying to get her away from paul , who all knew was a hot head.Now he looked like he could snap a girl bellas size into tiny pieces. 

you had gotten to her too late and paul was shaking and shifted into a large wolf. Then a brown wolf had jumped and tackled the other wolf.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

you had sat in Billy’s kitchen with Bella. Billy was super mad at bella for storming into his house and had made both of you girls sit down and wait for the alpha of the pack to help explain to Bella what had happened. 

Your world had been shaken to its core seeing that the legends were all true. 

you sat next to bella trying to keep her calm  as thoughts raced through your mind. ‘ who was the alpha of the pack? like it would have to be jacob right? were you going to shift too???” you stood fast and ran out of the house even though you were told to stay with bella. colors of green browns and black were around you as you continued to run into the woods moving past branches and jumping over logs. You went as far as your legs would take you until there was a tense pain in your chest. doubled over you breathed heavily slowly dropping to the ground. Anxiety filled your body.

After a few hours of being in the woods and trying to clear your mind and reassure yourself that you wouldn't turn there was a sound of cracking sticks. it couldn’t be Billy , maybe it was jacob you look around hoping to see someone you recognized. 

no such luck , you were met with a chaote.’fuck um what was it that my dad always told me when we went hunting....’ your mind went blank and you began looking for anyway out. The animal lunged and you closed your eyes waiting for intense pain but there wasnt any.

there were 3 large wolves around you , one that you didnt recognize had killed the chaote and the other two in front of you looked like  paul and the one that had pounced on him. the eyes of the brown wolf looked exactly like “ Jacob?” you asked looking at the brown wolf. He huffed and rubbed against your leg. The 3 wolves escorted you back home where your father was livid. “y/n all asked of you was to stay here with bella and wait for Sam why couldn't you do that?” you rolled your e/c eyes and decided a wolf fight was enough for today ” sorry dad...” Jacobs laugh filled the room from behind. “ Billy its fine we have it all handled from here." another voice came from behind you. 

Y/n turned around so fast that it could've caused whiplash you looked at a man who looked like the other boys just taller and more built . “ who are you?” the man just stared at you as if he had never met a person in his life. “rude” you rolled your eyes and started to leave the room . A large hand grabbed your arm tightly. Jacob glared at the man “ you did not just imprint on my sister!” he yelled at the other man who had a hold of your arm. “wait what? imprinting is a thing too?” the taller man let go of your arm and nodded shly. 

“jacob can you please handle telling things to bella since you are part of the reason she knows our secrets. and you come with me” jacob nodded and did as told. 

la push beach was as beautiful as it had been years ago.” Im not sure if you remember me well but im Sam Uley, we had gone to school together” he stopped walking right in front of you.All you could do is nod and look up at him. of course you remembered sam , who had punched your boyfriend at the time during prom. “ you punched my boyfriend and broke his nose my senior prom.” his eyebrows raised  “ well it was deserved” y/n rolled her eyes and laughed lightly. sam smiled and started walking with you again.” you know my dad is going to probabaly run over your feet with his wheelchair right.” sam laughed “ if that’s what it takes ill go through that pain for you.” You signed knowing that you only came back home because of jacob and now here you are , and imprint , a sister to a werewolf and daughter to a crippled man.

a week had passed and you had spent time catching up with your brother and father while sneaking off to hang out with sam for a few hours every night.

You woke up later than what had been planned due to embry and seth roughhousing and being loud. you came out in nothing but y/f/c crop top and jean shorts. your arms crossed tightly in front of you. 

sam smiled looking at his imprint and all the fly aways that had came loose from her braids that made her look even more beautiful to him. y/n stomped over to embry and quill and got directly in the middle of them “ cant rough housing wait until everyone in the house is awake” y/n looked from embry to quill and back. Sam and Jacob tensed up looking at y/n be in the middle of those two. “ well to be fair we didn’t know Sam and you would be getting busy so quickly” quill mumbled. Paul and Seth laughed. y/n looked like she was ready to kill all of them. “ and to think I was goiong to be nice enough to cook lunch for y'all” Quill’s eyes got wide “ what im not going to anymore, maybe its time you got busy making your own damn food.” This made the boys groan and glare at Quill. Sam wrapped his arms around Y/n’s body from behind. “ cant you make an exception for me” Y/n smiled up at the man.” nope because you could've intervened."

break was close to being over for y/n and she still hadn't talked to anyone about going home. she had gotten so attached to the boys and loved being in her childhood home. Billy wheeled over next to his daughter. “ when do you have to go back home?” her fathers voice snapped y/n out of her thoughts. “ 3 days” “ im going to miss having you here” y/n smiled weakly at her father knowing that she’d miss him too. Sam messaged y/n asking her when she was going to be coming over. Y/n just looked at the message and ignored it falling asleep on her bed at billy’s house. 

Around 5 am there was a knock on the door. Jacob rushed to go get it before it woke up anybody else in the house.... Too late Billy had gotten to the door before he could. Sam stood in the doorway no shirt on soaking wet from the rain that had already started so early in the day. “ i’ll get jacob-” “ im not here for Jacob sir, im here for y/n” sam cut Billy off. Billy took a long look at the man in his doorway and slammed the door in his face. “ When were you planning on telling me that Sam imprinted on your sister??? Does she know ?!” Billy yelled at his son.Y/n came into the room “ was that sam?” y/n ran out of the house to sam’s truck. He got out of the truck and pulled his imprint into a tight hug. “ you never answered my message last night and i got worried.” y/n sighed “ im leaving tonight sam , I have to go back home."  His grip loosened on her. “ going home ?” he looked utterly heartbroken that his imprint was going to be leaving him and going god knows where. y/n looked up at him “ yeah ive got to take care of all my stuff so i can come back here to be with the people important to me.” sam lifted up y/n and twirled her around. He lightly set her down “ you need to take one of the guys to keep you safe since i cant be there with you.” y/n smiled and nodded “ yes alpha “ Sam bent down and kissed y/n lightly. 

A/n; im not sure if there will be a part two if you guys want a part two lmk ill make it.

Edit: this is a series now 🤗 and it's doing well.

[chat-noir-always-here]

I rewatch Miraculous—Mr. Pigeon

Behold!!! The episode that almost made me stop watching Miraculous.

No for real i think i got up and left the room first time around, this episode was so ridiculous.

• “You only have one day to work on your fashion piece.” Only a day? That seems kinda unrealistic when you take into account designing, gathering materials, whether or not you need to go out and buy any materials, the amount of time it takes to actually put all that together...

•WHOA Gabriel’s actually smiling in that pic Mrs. Bustier shows. Er, smiling-ish

•Pure cinnamon roll child seems proud this peppermint frappucino dickhead is his father (Gabriel ur hair looks like whipped topping and that tie doesnt help). BE GRATEFUL FOR SUCH A CARIBG CHILD YOU PRICK!!!

•Maaaaaariii chill the fuck out your overactive imagination and severe anxiety are getting the better of you.

•AHEM Gabriel has a purple bowtie in Mari’s imagination instead of that ridiculous peppermint scarf he uses to hide Nooroo’s broach???

•Adrien: appears out of nowhere

Marintette: jerks and flops away like a fish on dry land

Me: lol bye Marinette

• Adriens beuatiful face when Mari is talking to him (before she blunders and stumbles with her words) is beautiful

•Mari’s beautiful face when Adrien is telling her “you’re so talented Marinette!” and the subtle tremor in her eyes as they widen with her smile...☺️😊😘i love my beautiful, anxious mess of a daughter

•Mari: Follows Adrien with her eyes like an owl. LMAO.

•Chloe does not deserve Sabrina 😒

•Whereas Gabriel resembles a peppermint frap, Hawk Moth/Papillion appears to be the result of what might happen if Batman and the riddler had a baby

•Ramier, bruh, there is like. Zero. Fucking. Reason to be that upset over not being allowed to feed pigeons. For real. Go feed them on some rooftop somewhere if you must. No reason to let Hawk Daddy akumatize you over it...

...

...

...You know what? We’re not calling Gabriel “daddy.”

EVER. Again.

•Also Hawk-shitface, pigeon dude is your worst idea and you keep coming back to him. Seriously at least put some effort into your champions’ outfits. Youre a fashion designer for petes sake!

• wow this show really loves its skin-tight body suits, huh? Even when they look ridiculous.

•Sabrina how the hell much did you have to pay for a cellphone that lets you zoom in on a fucking sketch from dozens of feet away and score yourself a crystal-clear image???

•Sabrina: “We’re soooo awesome!”

Chloe: “We?”

Chloe does NOT deserve Sabrina.

•Arent real bird feathers full of germs and bacteria that cause diseases? And Marinette “im immune to bird flu” Dupain-Cheng just plucked that shit up off the ground and put it on her hat of all things. I dont know whether to be fisgusted or impressed.

•Chat “paint me like one of your French girls” Noir for the win everybody

• “Im allergic to feathers.” I came across a theory on tumblr once (cant find the OP) that this coulda been caused by Emilie wearing the damaged Peacock broach when she was pregnant with him. If thats true i would be pleased😏

•Allow me to channel Chloe for this comment: LB, CN, that disguise is about as convincing as Mr. Pigeon and Bubbler’s get ups are appealing. In other words, NO.

•Chat Noir moonwalking with a hat on—booiii got some moves. 👌👌👌👌

• “You’re the cat dont you eat [pigeons] for breakfast?!” No LB, Kitty Boi is a domestic kitty otherwise he’d present to you little dead things like my cat used to do before we stopped letting him go out. This is an awful joke but SPARE THE BIRDS, theyre just like Ramier—being controlled by a monster.

• “On the count of three my beloved pigeons will commence fire.” As disgusting as pigeon poop is i think they’ll live. Cant you come up with a better evil plan? Threatening to break the glass floor at their feet by having the pigeons stomp on the cage would be more effective. I’m not trying to help the villain, kaay? I just prefer my villains to use their head. Honestly Team Rocket is more intimidating than Pigeon Dude.

•is it just me or is kitty boi especially adorable in this episode??? 😻😻😻

• flock of pigeons put a dent ten times the size of kitty boi’s head in the door

Okay thats actually kinda terrifying. What woulda happened if that attack hit a normal person wearing no magical armor??? They’d be pecked to bits...

• CN: “I gotta get outta here before my secret identity is revealed!”

LB: “Yeah you wouldnt wanna let the cat out of the bag!”

CN: “...Haha very funny.” 😾

Dont dish out what you cant take, handsome boy.

•LB’s look of amusement as CN starts running in place for fear of detransforming in front of others is hillarious

•kitty boi if this hotel takes tips you should really give Jean-whatshisname one. That was the speediest, life-saving room service ever.

•isnt this just Chloe’s room??? Theres a ladybug pillow on the bed and everything. Why did the mayor send CN to Chloe’s room???

• “i cant wait my dear pigeon.” Hmm reminds of later on when Hawk Moth calls Nats “My dear Mayura.” Bruh if you INTO Ramier just ask for his phone number like a normal person, quit akumatizing him and eat a damn snickers

•LB: Time for a sneak attack! Oh no, my sneak attack failed cuz my partner couldnt help but sneeze with all these FEATHERS around.

HELLO, he just told you he was allergic to feathers???

•ugh them censoring out the punches with flashy screenshots is so LAAAME show me the VIOLENCE.

• “Cat Noir! Grab [the bird call!]” AGAIN he’s ALLERGIC TO FEATHERS. Just tie that yoyo to something to keep Pigeon dude in the air and smash it yourself.

• Gabriel is that teacher from Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide who was never physically present in class and was only ever seen through a tablet or some nonsense

•Chloe getting busted my Marinette in front of the principal, Gabriel and Adrien is a great example of how PLAGIARISM DOESNT PAY are you listening art thieves lurking on tumblr, instagram and elsewhere???

•ahem Gabriel that sympathetic look you give a weeping Chloe is very out of character

• “youre the winner Marinette.” Not gonna check out Kim and Max’s hat? You could at least look at it, doesnt seem very impartial to pick Mari without looking at ALL the hats

•siiiiiiiiiighhhhhhhh

Girl they are BOTH allergic to feathers. How many blonde teenage boys walk around with a feather allergy? Quantum Masking or no Quantum Masking, c’mon you should be at least considering the idea theyre the same person from that knowledge alone.

Annnd thats all for now. This episode is more of a vent-inducing hate sink than enjoyable, save for the gushing waterfall of cute kitty boi moments it provides. I may do Stormy Weather later today to make up for it.

[atomicwedgienerd]

Boyfriend Twins No Longer

Derek was furious. Last night had been his 21st birthday and what should have been a blast had been ruined by all the jerks at that gay bar. “Boyfriend twins!” The taunt rung through his mind. Nobody had ever made fun of him and Arjun before! They didn’t even look that similar. After all, Derek might be tan but he could never be compared to Arjun. Sure they had both been wearing Abercrombie shirts and khakis in nearly the same hue, but lots of people dressed like that! And besides, Derek though their matching sneakers were cute. And yet, when they walked into that one queer bar in town, the hipsters all turned to them and immediately started laughing. The door guy asked if they were clones and the bartender asked if there was a 2-for-1 special at the Abercrombie shop. Like they were so cool just because they had piercings and tattoos! That didn’t make them unique! There were plenty of hipster “boyfriend twins” in that bar and nobody gave them any guff! Regardless, Derek couldn’t stop fixating on it. He hated being criticized by other gays after a lifetime of being mocked by straight people for being different. He glanced over at Arjun as he snoozed, admiring his butt in the matching pair of Andrew Christian briefs that they had actually bought in a 2-for-1 sale. Well damn, thought Derek, maybe we are a little similar. “Are you ok, hun?” Arjun asked, stirring from his sleep. Derek sighed and turned away. “You can’t be upset about the boyfriend twins thing, can you?” Derek harumphed and turned to his lover, unaware that the mystical forces that grant birthday wishes had decided to pay attention to Derek this year. “I just wish we weren’t so similar!” Derek said angrily. A lighting bolt cracked across the sky, scaring both of the boyfriends. “You’re being dramatic,” Arjun sighed as he got up from the bed. “Let me make you some coffee and we can do something fun for your birthday. Arjun headed out to the kitchen, his ass looking great in the jockstrap he was wearing. Wait, that wasn’t right, thought Derek. They had the same pair of underpants! “Arjun!” Derek cried. “What’s up with that jockstrap!?” “Uh duh, it’s what I always wear, bro,” Arjun yelled back from the kitchen. That didn’t seem right to Derek. He looked down at his own lap and noticed that he was now wearing a pair of plain Hanes tighty-whiteys. That definitely wasn’t right. He sat up and leaned over the edge of the bed but something else was wrong. His feet didn’t reach the floor anymore. Derek panicked and stood up. He looked in the mirror and something was off. Where they had both been a solid 5’11” before, Derek couldn’t be more than 5’8” now and he was looking leaner than usual. There was something weird going on with his hair but Derek couldn’t really discern it in the mirror. He grabbed his pair of thick black framed glasses from the end table and threw them on. His hair was paler, more red, than before and seemed to be stuck in a weird center part. This was not the haircut he had gotten a week ago. And wait a minute! Derek didn’t need glasses! He threw them off and the world turned into a total blur. Derek started to panic, breathing heavily and starting to hyperventilate. Arjun reentered the room, or at least Derek thought the blurry shape was Arjun—it seemed taller—and handed Derek a glass of skim milk. “What’s this?” Derek whined, his voice noticeably higher pitched. “Where is my coffee?” “You can’t drink coffee, bro,” Arjun laughed, his voice noticeably deeper. “You’re spastic enough as it is.” Arjun took a deep sip of his coffee. “Give me a sip of your coffee then!” Derek whined. Arjun laughed. “You need to put on your glasses dude.” Derek did as he was told and was shocked as the world came into focus. The Arjun in front of him was different. He was taller for one, at least 6’2” now, and substantially more muscular than he had been before. Whereas Arjun had always been clean shaven, he was now sporting a decent five o’clock shadow. Derek rubbed his face; it was now smooth where before he had been sporting the beginnings of a beard. And then Derek noticed Arjun wasn’t drinking coffee at all. He had a protein shake. “Something isn’t right!” Derek wheezed. Arjun rolled his eyes and handed him an inhaler. “You need to calm down bro. And use your inhaler. You know you’re not supposed to get excited. It’s time for us to get dressed and head to campus anyways.” “But it’s my birthday!” Derek complained, taking three short puffs of the inhaler. “So who cares!?” Arjun laughed. “Get out of my room and go get dressed!” Arjun’s room!? But they had shared a room for six months. Regardless, Derek felt too timid to argue and he shuffled meekly out of the room. Derek headed down the hallway and then noticed his backpack peeking out from their study. He opened the door and was shocked at what he saw. It wasn’t a study any more. It had turned into a bedroom. In the center was a twin sized bed with Pokemon sheets. The walls were decorated with anime posters and cardboard cut outs of Lord of the Rings figures. There was an entire shelf of trophies from Math League, Chess Club, the 24-Hour Coding Challenge, Klingon Karaoke. Whoever had this room was a total dork! And that’s when Derek saw it. A framed picture on the wall of a total dork with Patrick Stewart at a comic convention. The guy looked familiar even though he was wearing thick glasses and the nerdiest clothes Derek had ever seen. He looked closer and gasped. It was HIM. But this wasn’t right! This room belonged to a total dork and Derek wasn’t a geek! He barely even used his computer. And yet this room had a massive desk with multiple computers on them, running World of Warcraft! Derek looked at the picture again and shook his head. This couldn’t be right. He would never dress like this! And yet when Derek opened the closet. all the clothes matched those in the pictures. Plaid button downs, cheap pleated dress slacks, shiny leather shoes. None of it seemed right. “Hurry the fuck up and get dressed!” Arjun yelled from out in the hall. Derek had never heard him yell like that before. That wasn’t the Arjun he knew but something made Derek quiver. He did not want to make Arjun mad! He sighed and started getting dressed. He buttoned up the button down all the way to the top and felt compelled to add a too short black tie. He put on a pair of clashing brown slacks that stopped a couple of inches above his ankle and couldn’t stop himself from attaching a pair of red suspenders that yanked the waist of the pants up above his belly button. All of Derek’s socks were white crew socks now and they clashed with his black patent leather shoes but he could hear Arjun getting impatient so he threw them on in resignation. He was scared to make Arjun mad; something he had never felt before. He looked at himself in the mirror and sighed. He looked like a total dork! He had definitely shrunk too! There was no way he was over 5’2” now. “HURRY UP DWEEB!” Arjun boomed from the living room. Derek grabbed his backpack and meekly shuffled out, his confidence totally eradicated. He gasped when he saw his boyfriend. Arjun towered over him now, standing at a solid 6’6”. Where he had been slightly muscled before, he was now a total meathead, weighing in at 300 lbs of pure muscle. The five o’clock shadow he had moments before was now a beard of epic proportion that came down to mid chest and his hair was up in an unruly and super masculine bun. Arjun’s muscles were massive… unlike anything Derek had ever seen and they were on full display as Arjun was now wearing a muscle tank that said “Give Me Deadlifts or Give Me Death” on it. On his legs, he wore tight black sweats that showed off every bit of muscle in his thighs and his massive calved. His arms were now dotted with tattoos and an 8 gauge septum piercing adorned his nose while double zero gauges rested comfortably in his ears. “S-s-s-since when do you l-l-l-lift weights?” Derek said, now aware that he stuttered. “S-s-s-s-since fucking forever, braceface,” Arjun laughed. Braceface? Why would Arjun call him that? But Derek reached up and touched his mouth and knew the answer. Huge clunky orthodontics were now glued to his teeth and when he caught his reflection in the mirror, he sighed. “You sh-sh-shouldn’t talk to your own boyfriend like that,” Derek implored. This sent Arjun into a series of hearty chortles. “Boyfriend!?” he laughed. “I would never date a dweeb like you, fuckwad. The only reason we live together is that the college said I needed to get my grades up if I wanted to stay on the weightlifting team and well, you’re too much of a fucking pussy to stand up to me when I ask you to do my homework.” Derek tried to argue but found himself getting too nervous. I guess I am too much of a pussy, he thought. “You’re right, Arjun,” Derek complied. Arjun rolled his eyes. “How many times have I told you? It’s AJ, not Arjun. Only my mom calls me Arjun. Now let’s get going.” Arjun grabbed Derek by the waist of his tighty whiteys, effortlessly lifting him up in a painful wedgie and carried him out the door. As they walked to campus, Derek felt all eyes on them. People were swooning over Arjun—er—AJ and pointing and laughing at Derek the whole way. He couldn’t stand it! AJ and Derek couldn’t be more different. That’s when it hit Derek. The wish. HE HAD WISHED FOR THIS. “Th-th-this isn’t what I wanted,” Derek said meekly as they arrived on campus. “Well I didn’t want to have to spend time with the university’s least attractive virgin but here we are,” AJ said as he dumped a bunch of books in Derek’s hands. “I’m going to need all these papers written by Monday so I can stay on the team.” “B-b-b-but-“ “No buts, dork!” AJ yelled as he shoved him towards the library. Derek looked at AJ with tears in his eyes. They had been so close, so in love, and now this was their life. More muscular hunks walked up to AJ as they started heading off to the gym. Derek turned meekly and started shuffling towards the library, his spindly legs giving him an awkward gait. “Hey nerd!” AJ yelled after Derek. “You forgot your student ID!” He flung it at Derek and it hit him right in the forehead, causing a chorus of laughs from AJ’s weightlifting bros. Derek struggled to pick it up from the ground without dropping all his books and gasped at his ID. For a brief moment, it listed the correct information: “Derek Parker, English Comp” before shimmering for a moment and changing. Derek blinked his eyes and looked at it again through this thick coke-bottle glasses. “Derwin Pimpleberg, Computer Science,” he sighed. Derek—make that Derwin—had totally changed, and all because of this stupid birthday wish. He headed into the library wanting to cry. Luckily, Derwin found academic achievement easy, which was great because soon AJ was making him do not only his homework, but also all of AJ’s weightlifting bros’ homework. AJ and his boys would come around on Saturdays and get wasted before heading out leaving Derwin alone to play World of Warcraft all weekend. While AJ would bring home a different stud every night to fuck, Derwin was alone reading fantasy novels and writing World of Warcraft fanfiction. And the noise from AJ’s heavy fucking made Derwin sad. Before the change, Derek and Arjun had had plenty of sex, but Derwin—well that was a different story. He was a virgin and try as he might over the next few decades, no one ever wanted to have sex with him and he remained a virgin forever. Eventually, the now roommates graduated but AJ didn’t want to let Derwin go. Why would he? Derwin was too meek to fight with AJ and would clean up after him, make his protein shakes, and wash his dirty gym clothes for him. Besides, whereas AJ’s degree was useless, Derwin’s computer science degree was a cash cow and Derwin was making tons of money consulting. Of course, AJ had made Derwin sign over all of his bank accounts to him so AJ could focus on professional body building instead of working, meaning that Derwin still had to wear cheap dorky clothes and couldn’t really afford to go out, not that he had any friends he needed to see. A few year later, Derwin had to go to his high school reunion and AJ decided to tag along. All of Derek’s friends were shocked to see that their old buddy was now a total nerd stereotype that went by Derwin but they were all enamored with AJ and joined in on mocking, ridiculing, and beating up Derwin. As his former friends hoisted him up the flagpole so he had to just dangle there in an atomic wedgie, Derwin sighed. He had wished that he and AJ were different and well, it couldn't have come any more true. 

[dayna-scully]

ncis s3 lb

I did a whole big Thing™/tiva liveblog a couple years ago when I last rewatched NCIS - unfortunately my previous blog has been lost to the incompetence of tumblr’s content moderation so lets do it all again!

season 4   |  season 5  |  season 6  |  season 7  |  season 8  |  season 9  |  season 10  |  etc

kill ari 1

babby zivaaaa

I genuinely can’t believe Ziva is canonically only 23 at this point - I’m 23. She’s so young

confused boner Tony

also poor Ziva - she just wants her big brother to not be the bad guy

Kill ari 2

unrealistically hd cell photos

espresso and pizza in the rain

and aggressive hate flirting

3x04

bi ziva confirmed, fite me

nice seeing you again, tony

sweet baby angel and her new dad

right now you’re thinking of doing page 57 with me 😉

I’m observing you tony

weird ass look at 29:57

3x05

tony really doesn’t want to be attracted to ziva but he can’t heelllllp ittt

3x06

ziva interrogating mcgoo about Tony’s love life 👀👀

first date! first date!!!!!!

3x07

(side note, jenny really wanted to have kids with gibbs hahahaha kill me)

Tony’s jealous that she’s friends with Tim and not him

(gibbs and jenny with their own little boy kill me 😖😖)

undercovers

even ziva can’t be that good at faking sex

and I don’t know that the facial expressions were necessaryyyy when the fbi can’t see yer faces my dudes

that was definitely not your knee

the smooch was unnecessary toooooooo

it was kinda ziva’s idea (to be entirely naked while...”simulating” sex)

I’m not sure how McGee didn’t spontaneously combust being in the presence of such unrestrained sexual tension

“maintaining your cover”

“afraid I’ll bite, tony?” (When you accidentally break cover because you weren’t really acting)

“ziva and tony are hitting the racks” THEYRE SURE HITTING SOMETHING GIBBS

I’d be surprised if ziva WASNT waiting around the corner for tony to ask the FBI agent out just so she could announce it at just the right time

“Just trying to picture you pregnant”/“i have to, I’m going to be a father”

ziva’s face when Tony’s getting punched

tony is willing to die for herrrrr

ziva holding Tony up 🙃 so natural kill me

3x09

ziva will rate mcgoo’s butt but not tony’s 👀

three points off for excessive hair

otherwise ziva is very much a butt man (for tony’s butt)

sad head pat

3x10

gibbs is prochoice

3x11

why is ziva so touchy with tony hmm 🤔

I believe officer david asked you to siddown

Boxed In

ziva is definitely panicking

tony is definitely jealous that ziva is having everyone else over and not him

anyways in what world is constantly questioning and discussing each other’s relationships, preferences, and intimacy like a normal work partner thing (hint: it isnt)

I’m braless

why are you on top of me/undercovers flashbacks

why are you STILL on top of me

I’m sorry I didn’t invite you to dinner last night

so she’s doin it tonight 😉😉😉😉😉😉😉 only with tony this time 😉😉😉😉😉😉😉

3x13

always touching

are you saying you’d like to handcuff me tony 😉😉

you’re the one who likes to be handcuffed 👀

cuff yourself to him!!!

double headslap

totally normal partner behaviour

3x15

i always tease my coworkers about their lovelife while i’m 3 inches away from their face

partners in mischief and sometimes crime

3x18

sometimes watching z/t scenes is almost voyeuristic. I’d never accuse the writers of, well, good writing because lbr it’s rare, but the scenes in this episode are quite good. Tony showing a level of maturity that we never see, and seeing ziva observe this at the same time really is fantastic

3x19

McGee isn’t bicurious he’s bifurious leave his skin care alone tony, you’re just a homophobe

Tony’s jokes are always funny to ziva hmm🤔

normal way to look at your coworker

3x20

it’s totally normal to tell your coworker you’re a screamer and it’s totally normal to contemplate the fact that your coworker is a screamer

pizza, interrogation, and flirting

platonic

I, too, proposition my coworker so I won’t get in trouble for car crashes

3x21

when your crush says something funny

I’ve come to collect my girlfriend agent david

I’m not a fan of abby but she and mcgee should have been endgame

3x22

camille!!!!

poor ziva, she’s so scared of losing her new home over something she knows she didn’t do

3x23

oh no oh dear oh no

I wish I liked my coworkers as mych as tony and ziva like each other

everyone is worried about dad

I suppose ari’s death gives gibbs and ziva’s relationship context that the viewers have and the characters don’t.  poor ziver

3x24

it’s so important that ziva was the one to bring gibbs out of the amnesia, and the writers apparently FORGOT when they “killed” her and when he sent her away to israel and and and and and and and

ziva and tony deserved better

poor baby z. poor gibbs.

[candyclan]

Coming out letter to my mom. (FTM) At the start of my transition, I wanted to go by a name that started with an “A”because my birthname did. All the rest of it is basically the same.

THE TRUTH:

I didn’t scream “I am a boy” at my parents. Honestly, my mother (specifically) controlled a lot of what I did, who I hung out with, and what I wore as a child. I believe she has/had an idea about what she wanted out of a daughter since I was born, and really just lived through me. I think she eventually had to give me room to make my own decisions, later in life. I didn’t come out until I was 16, although I had spent 6 months prior to even coming out thinking about my gender identity. I was extremely sheltered. I want you guys to know that I didn’t know what being transgender was until I was a freshman in high school and met my best friend (who is STILL MY BEST FRIEND TODAY) who identified as Non-binary gender fluid. I had never really met someone AFAB that lived to be anything other than female. With that came the knowledge that sometimes, men don’t necessarily have to have penises and I can wear whatever I’m comfortable with. I used to be religious in middle school (raised Christian) but I never found god. It never made sense to me how so many people can put their faith in other people’s ideas of what god is (the Bible) but not listen when their real CHILD comes to them and tells them that they feel uncomfortable in their gender identity. I also came out as bisexual in middle school, after meeting a girl I had a fancy for. To which my mother sobbed and cried and asked how she had failed as a parent. I remember loving pink, it was my favorite color. Pink, purple, blue. My top 3. Now it’s blue, pink, purple but basically the same. I had a pink room, loved hello kitty, let my mom curl my hair with little curlers at night so I could wake up and be somebody different the next day. My brother played with carebears and my Barbie dolls more than I did as a child. I remember a toy gun and handcuffs. I was fairly experimental as a child, I did: Girl Scouts, swimming, piano, soccer, ballet, cheerleading, and more honestly. I always got “boy” toys at McDonald’s (I mean cmon they’re cooler) I just was kinda everywhere. I feel like that’s easier for someone AFAB to be. My brother was harassed by my family for liking girly things but I was never shown that I couldn’t like stereotypical “boy things” by extended family. My mother however in the line at McDonalds I could never forget, turned and looked at me (baseball cap backwards tank top and shorts)and said “So, what?” “Are you batting for the other team” implying that because of the clothes I liked to wear I would be a lesbian. My mother (like I said, kinda controlling and extremely narcissistic) when I was allowed to cut my hair super short for the first time I was 16. Afterwards she has said things like: “but you’re so pretty how could you have cut your hair” “you looked so nice with long hair” I never felt akin to femininity. I was actually VERY uncomfortable with it. I hated being the “weaker” gender. I never wanted my nails painted. It was torture. I acted like makeup and and nail polish was torture, the hairbrush was my enemy. I used to just put my hair up in a low ponytail every day as I got older. I knew she’d never let me cut it all off. Basically, other than wanting to grow up strong and tough and not liking to be treated like a female, I was female. There were parts of being female I didn’t really have a problem with, and honestly that’s why I didn’t come out for so long. I wasn’t in a house or raised by people I knew would accept anything other than me being their “little girl” I was a daddies girl. So between my lack of understanding of where my feelings towards my gender roles were coming from, being encouraged by my family to be girly, not being exposed to gender diversity (or anything queer), and my controlling mother, I remained in the dark about who I was.

TRIGGER WARNING:::(abuse)::::: I was never close with my mother, and actually hated her growing up. To this day she is the most judge mental, self-centered woman I know. My father was funny, charismatic, and lost his shit sometimes. I like to say, 90% of the time he was amazing. We made jokes and could literally finish each other’s sentences. But honestly my father, 10% of the time was abusive. Most of my abuse in my life was covert (narcissistic abuse from my mother) and verbal/emotional/barely physical abuse from my father. He’s 6”3’ 350 lbs and very loud and scary, especially to a young child. He punched a hole in my wall, he threw a remote at a wall and shattered it to pieces, he threatened to kill my dog with a baseball bat in front of me. Which I swear to god he would have done if I wasn’t holding my dog, protecting him. These moments were few and far between, but they were riddled with insults and almost always left me with less than I started with. My father did spank my brother and I, and one time he clapped my brother so well that he left a purple hand mark on his butt. My mother told my father she’d take us away if that happened again. My father never left marks. He never had to, he was so big and would just get up in my face and scream at me. He made me feel helpless. Because he was invading my space I felt physically threatened, and he never actually had to touch me and leave bruises because that threat was already implied by invading my space. I was so young, but I always knew my family wasn’t right. Finally at 16, I stood up to my father for the first time. I didn’t care if he was bigger than me, I didn’t care if I would lose, I was willing to fight for me. Anyway, long story short the police were called because we were screaming at each other in front of his apartment building. I’m not going to say I didn’t fuck up as a teenager, but I never deserved the pressure and the abuse he was dishing out and had dished out my whole life. I knew that. I cut him out of my life just after turning 16, by then I had been questioning my identity. It became easier after leaving my father to fall into who I was. My father is FAIRLY religious and my mother claims to be but she never talks about god, she never prays, and now that my father and her are divorced I don’t think she’s been inside a church since. Losing my father was a lot, despite his abuse he and I were really close and had really similar personalities. The reality of abuse isn’t “well, now I see them as an abuser so now none of that good stuff is left it’s all tainted” I had to struggle with losing someone very important in my life at a young age, for myself.

Arguments against me being trans:

My family has been a bit divided in responding to me coming out. By now, it’s been about 4 years.

My mother and her side of the family are in denial. They don’t understand how I can’t be a “lesbian that just likes boy things”. They don’t use my name or pronouns.

My father, what little communication I have with him now, is bewildered. He and I had a discussion this past Christmas where I brought up what his abuse did to me mentally and he apologized but then tried to say “well what about your part in all of this” and said that I was hanging out with crazy depressed people, cutting myself, doing drugs, (I was smoking weed and I’ve tried acid like once piss off) and was sneaking out. Yeah. I did do all of that BUT GUESS WHAT. IM 20. I go where I wanna go. I fuck who I wanna fuck. I smoke what I want and guess what? It’s not any different from when I was 16 except now I don’t have parents up my ass telling me what to do. His argument basically was that I need to own up to what I did too and that fucking angered me. You don’t apologize and then go “well what about you” that’s not an apology. That’s deflection and honestly I don’t think I need to apologize because my parents were super controlling. I was just trying to do what I wanted and they didn’t like it. He and I have talked about me being trans and he pretty much thinks I’m certifiable. Doesn’t use my name or pronouns.

My brother: Ethan, my brother and I have always been close. He’s 17 now, and he had a different reaction to me being trans. Of all of my family he was the most receptive to my pleas of gender dysphoria and he suffers with anxiety so he gets stuff. But alas, after asking him if he’d call me by my name and pronouns (after 4 years of being out) he thinks that I am the one that has an issue with society. I told him I was starting T soon and he said: “Hrt won’t lessen all the things that come with being transgender. If you feel like doing hormones is the best for you then do it, but from a logical standpoint I think there just needs to be more thickening of skin” he claimes that if I try hard enough I could be fine living as female. Doesn’t use my name or pronouns.

None of my family supports me. None of my family understands. And none of them ever will. I have been out for four fucking years. I can’t tell you how frustrating family rejection can be. I have cried so much at the idea of not having a supportive family. I feel like I was ripped away from a beautiful life somewhere and thrust into this mess.

Honestly though, it doesn’t matter, the world keeps spinning and I keep finding people who love and accept me for who I truly am. I have made peace with my family’s lack of acceptance. It’s made me stronger and more compassionate towards others. Made me want to be better than them. I am actually going to start hormones soon, and on top of other fears I have, will be cutting my family out of my life. I can’t be 25 with a full beard and getting misgendered by my family. I can’t do it. They may feel like I’m going too far, that I don’t have to do this, but I do. I’m not doing this because I didn’t get too much attention as a kid or my mom favored my brother over me, I’m not doing this because it’s cool, I’m not doing this because I’m bored, I’m not doing this because I hate myself or anyone else. This is AFFIRMATION. Sometimes, cutting people who can’t see you for who your really are out of your life is affirming too.

Guys, girls, people, keep your head up. Things get better, I know. I thought life was never going to get better so I know that’s what it can feel like. But it does. Never ever let someone control your life or who you are. You’re beautiful/handsome/amazing! You deserve to be comfortable in your own skin and to love who you are. I am getting there, we all are.

Love,

Tanner M.

[z2aseaqj-blog]

Renters insurance?

Renters insurance?

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[courtneyhudson0225]

Weight loss

226. 226. 226. I can repeat that number all day long. Its the number that sticks in my head all day long. Its the number i weighed when i began my final weight loss journey on January 22, 2019. I say final because this is the only 'diet' ive started, lost weight on, and continued on. Now, mind you, 226 isnt the biggest ive ever been either. I was about 240 (not even pregnant) about a year before that. Maybe bigger at some points but at one point, i couldnt stand on the scale anymore, fearful of the number. Ive struggled with my weight all of my adult life. 20 years old, i started to gain and the number just grew. I was fat. I was obese. My self esteem was low. My sex life was non existent. And my confidence was shot. Just gone. Nowhere to be found. 31 years old, 4 kids, and married for 13 years, January 22nd was my first day to my new life. Welcome to my keto lifestyle.

Enter Keto!

A very good friend of mine started Keto about 5 months before me. She had lost so much weight, i was floored. I knew i had to do this. I had started researching Keto when i was about 6 months pregnant with my 4th child. I toyed with the idea but knew i needed to be in the right mind frame before i could begin this. Then, my friend came over on January 21. That was it. I was in!

Livin' the Keto Life!

The next day, i downloaded the carb manager app and started my journey. The beginning started like all your fad diets. Yea, i can do this, this is easy, im doing this. Then the next few days went by. Checking what was carbs, how many carbs was in this or that, what am i gonna make for dinner. Then, the struggle began. By day 3 i was missing sugar. I wanted something sweet. The gallon of chocolate milk was staring at me and chocolate milk is my vice. I love it!!! My son and i would go through 2 gallons of it in a week. Not to mention, chips, cookies, candy, snack cakes and the list goes on. I would eat an entire box of snack cakes in a sitting. A new box, was lucky if it wasnt gone in the first day. But, back to my chocolate milk staring at me in the fridge. I had a choice to make. Have a glass and call it another fad i tried and failed at or have a drink of it, get my craving out of the way and get back on my journey. Which option?

30 Days In ....

The drink of chocolate milk got me through. It happened a couple of times, and the same with a couple swigs of orange juice. But its what helped me. It paved the way. My keto life at 30 days in was a different picture. I was 17lbs down and the number on the scale kept getting lower. I could sit crossed legged in the chair. I could walk the neighborhood with my kids and not feel like i was gonna die, right on the porch. Small victories but it meant something. My clothes fit better. My face was thinner. My mind was clearer. And my sex drive was going up. 30 days in and i couldn't believe i hadnt given up. I started to walk on the treadmill a little bit. Not much, a couple times a week for 30 minutes but i could do it. But, how long would it last, really? I missed chocolate and carbs.

60 Days .... What?!

Did i really make it 2 months? I must admit, i had a small bite of cake, just a taste, every now and again but i didnt want the chocolate milk or OJ anymore. I didnt crave it. The scale was down another 10 lbs, the weight loss does slow down after the first month, but i felt sooo much better. About myself and i had more energy. More clarity. I cant believe i have done this for 60 days when originally i didnt think i would last a week. Better yet, ive encourage others to try Keto. Ive been posting results, food, and recipes on FB. My mom, my husband, friends, and my sister are all following. Wow. On one post, someone called me inspiring. Inspiring!!! Thats amazing to have an impact on someone else. 60 days in.

Where are we now?

Its April 10th. Were 12 days away from 90 days. 195. 195. 195. Thats where i am now. Thats 31lbs in 10 weeks. Ive lost more than 20" acrossed my body. I went from a XXL and size 22 jeans to a size large shirt and size 14 jeans. I feel prettier. Sexier. Healthier. I can almost run a mile. 14 minutes. I didnt even do that in high school. I have not been under 200lbs in over 10 years, or more. I can walk without being winded. I look in the mirror and smile. I take selfies and like them. In fact, i feel conceited i take so many now but its the first time in years i feel so good about myself. 5 pants sizes smaller. 31lbs lighter. 2 shirt sizes down and a smaller bra! I cannot say how much keto has changed my life. January 22nd was the day my life changed forever. The first day to my new life. Bacon, butter, meat .... all things that help me lose weight. I love getting on the scale every morning and seeing if the number drops. Some days it doesnt, and that number stays around for 4 or 5 days but then it drops. Going out and other peoples houses for dinner arent always easy. Being around sweets at parties and events is much easier now, i usually dont even want it. When i do taste something i havent had in a while, it doesnt taste the same. My taste buds have changed. Cooking for the kids isnt always easy. I would love a bite of creamy mac and cheese. The kids eat partially keto, sometimes they dont even know it.

Keto can change your life. If you allow it. Attaching pictures of me through the years to see my weight struggle. Also, some keto pictures and my results now. Its real. Its not always easy but its worth it.