#this isnt anti any ship so im not tagging it that way
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fritextramole Ā· 2 years ago
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why is the riverdale tag always full of shipping content that's literally the least interesting part of the show
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bluinary Ā· 1 year ago
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Imo it's the desire to experience a fantasy that motivates these comments. In these people's eyes, The Nice Guy At Work should either be perfect and emotionally mature with no character development needed, or he should crash and burn and prove himself an incel for the audience's satisfaction, while Retsuko learns to be happy alone. But you're right; folks forget that Aggretsuko's main thesis is teaching us how to *accept reality*.
If you're looking for love in your 20s-- which Retsuko is-- no man within a healthy age range of you is going to be fully formed and as emotionally healthy as, say, Kristoff in Frozen II. You're supposed to grow together, which Retsuko and Haida do.
Also, examining the "nice guys" trope Retsuko and Haida may fall into, people fail to examine Retsuko's reasons for saying "no" to Haida, or Haida's reasons for "pursuing", which he never really did after he got what felt like a clear "no". He's not just some dude from work-- he was in Retsuko's inner circle for quite some time. Maybe she felt like she "didn't know him that well," which she said a lot, but in actuality, she spent more time with him than everyone except Fenneko. The context seemed more leaning toward the feeling that Haida was her work friend, and nothing more, which was a boundary Retsuko placed.....for what? (Bear with me here.)
Because she knew that giving someone from her department a try would maybe be more difficult and risky, yet simultaneously boring, than dating, say, a mysterious dude from her Driver's Ed class. It would also be less exciting, because she *already* knew a lot about Haida. And let's be real; Retsuko's big character arc, in addition to gaining her confidence and her voice without exploding, is mainly about her losing her taste for whirlwind hijinks. Remember that her plan in S1 was to "get cute", find a rich guy, get married ASAP, and then leave her boring, crappy accounting job for good. But she grew to realize that her boss, while an asshole, wasn't the Devil himself. Tsunoda wasn't the workplace Succubus she imagined her to be, just predictably shallow in some areas of her personality. Kabae was more than a nuisance; Tsubone held a lot of wisdom to offer. Even Anai had a chill button. A steady job wasn't a bad thing. And throughout her development, Retsuko had to also reasses her relationship with Haida. Because while her "no" meant "no", and Haida took it as such without cutting her off as a friend, Retsuko had to change how she saw him as she did with all of her coworkers (save Fenneko) in order to grow as a person. And, while frustrated with some of his flaws, she saw that Haida was fundamentally kind, mostly easy-going, and extremely dependable when she needed a friend. Maybe not as exciting as Tadano, or seemingly mysterious as the Space Cadet, but Haida was an ideal long-term partner. Retsuko just had to grow up a bit to see it.
And that message isn't for Nice Guys. Remember that the Aggretsuko brand was made specifically for us-- young, disillusioned women in our 20s who needed something a bit more relatable than, though just as cute as, Hello Kitty. And as someone who's been with a *lot* of dudes, the message rings true: compatibility doesn't lie in excitement. And while we should make our voices heard, the world will also feel like a much kinder place when we see everyone around us as human beings instead of caricatures or tropes. This also explains the lack of focus on Retsuko for the last few penultimate seasons; she had a HUGE arc accomplishment when she finally gave Haida a chance. Not for him, but for *her*. Being someone actively looking for a long-term partner, Retsuko's mental state and worldview was almost always reflected in one way or another by the man/ men she was dating in each season. Including the Otome men who made her broke. When she was finally able to cut through her own excuses for not giving a perfectly great potential partner an honest try, knowing that he could provide everything she truly wanted and needed, Retsuko broke through the last hang-up on her main character arc of the show: accepting reality. And these last few seasons, while she isn't perfect, she still maintains that development as she's slower to rage at little things, is still vocal about her wants and needs, and sees almost everyone around her as a necessary piece to the life she enjoys. She's found an amazing balance.
And as for Haida-- we're seeing a mostly static, already seemingly well-rounded character have his own arc. The important thing, I think, is that Retsuko isn't *responsible* for Haida's growth and development, even if she sometimes feels like she is bc she cares so much. Haida ultimately comes to his own conclusions, fosters his own growth, and works hard with the motivation of being a worthy partner for Retsuko. It's not the fantasy of him being the Perfect Man for their entire relationship, or somehow rescuing Retsuko from the issues she began the show with, but their relationship is mutually supportive and insanely healthy. And ykw...healthy is boring šŸ˜‚ I saw someone saying "they don't do couple stuff", like what did they expect? Good relationships are boring and functional, and that is what Retsuko and Haida are. We can write fluffy, spicy, or angsty fanfic to fill in the gaps. But making their relationship more "interesting" would serve no purpose to the story. Though ofc, I wouldn't complain over a tag-team karaoke rage at Haida's dad, lol. (But even that didn't happen bc of great character development, bc being healthy and well-adjusted is.....say it with me.....boring šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚).
All of this to say: OP you're right and you should say it!!!
SO Ive seen several people say that Haida and Retsuko's relationship dident work this season due to their poor relationship skills and miscommunication. But I would argue that their relationship does work.
It works in that even after the two-way lying and miscomunication and tax fraud, their relationship still stands.
You guys have to remember that being in a relationship -- a true relationship -- is a big fucking hurdle to jump through. Yes, Retsuko had been in other relationships before, but this the first true relationship that has had any weight to it.
Throughout the 4 seasons we saw Retsuko's other relationships crumble to dust over the tiniest things.
Retsuke was a unmotivated wet napkin of a person and when he didn't commit to the relationship that Retsuko wanted, Retsuko told him and broke it off.
Tadano was a good egg, but Retsuko ultimately discovered that both Tadano and herself had conflicting future relationship goals --Retsuko wanted to get married and start a family, but Tadano wasn't interested in getting tied down (he said so himself, he though that marriage was a waste of time, and that hurt retsuko because one of her dreams through the entire series was to get married and settledown to have a family)
and the same thing happens with Haida and Inui. Like, they were a very cute couple and possibly would have gone somewhere, but Haida's feelings for Retsuko would have (for lack of a better word) stained the relationship. Inui saw how much he loved Retsuko, and very maturely, decided that she couldn't compete for his affections. So like, she cuts it off before it begins. Like, knowing that your relationship would have gone down hill due to uncontrolable outside influences and then cutting it off before it could get worse is a mature thing to do.
Also I've seen someone say that Retsuko was passive about the entire tax fraud and I'm like???? she wasn't???? She knew very well that her boyfriend was keeping secrets from her, and when those secrets were confirmed that her boyfriend was doing company-wide tax fraud for the CEO, instead of taking it to the Japanese national news, she formulated a mission impossible heist plan with all of her co-workers in order to get the information needed to confirm that they were infact commiting tax fraud in order to get the CEo fired and then had a talk with her boyfriend about how what he was doing was wrong. Like, she took the step and called him out and that untimely gave Haida the confidence to step up to the CEO and call him out on his bullshit????
Like how is that passivity????
And everyone needs to know that Haida in the thick of it as well. Like his paranoia and fear wasn't something that came out of no where. Hadia said so himself that anyone else in the company had a fair chance of getting fired due to budget cuts and low profits, and so the pressure to succeed was growing. People were getting pressured to quiet left and right thanks to the new CEO. Mr. Tone was demoted then forced to quiet a job he really loved; Kabai was forced to quit as well from a job she really liked because everyone was making her feel worthless for having a family to take care of instead of being at work.
and when Haida showed that he had a good chance with his new accounting software to succeed and NOT get fired, he took that chance to rub elbows with the new CEO. And not only that, but thanks to the new CEO, the company was falling behind and had to commit tax fraud in order to stay afloat, and again DUE TO NOT WANTING TO BE FIRED AND DEEMED WORTHLESS TO THOSE AROUND HIM, Haida took up tax fraud in order to survive. On top of wanting the praise that he so badly needed. There were multiple times where Haida laments that Retsuko is on a whole new other level than him, and that he feels like he just one of the fanboys in the crowd. In the season, when he sees that Retsuko has restarted her screaming channel and has started growing back her following, that feeling comes back. He really does love Retsuko so much and wants to be where Retsuko is so badly but he feels as if none of what he's done in life fits with Retsuko's life.
Like, for christ sake, Retsuko is the ex-girlfriend to the aggretsuko version of Mark Zuckerberg who also one-hit-wonder pop idle star who nearly got murdered by an incel and Haida is a wanna-be British rock band bass guitar player who does accounting by day who still lives in his parents' apartment complex rent free (lucky bastard)
and on top of all that, there was Retsuko's lies. Like, his suspicion and jealousy was not unjustified??? Like, wouldn't you feel the same way if you saw your significant other lied in front of your face about what you were doing, arrive home in the fancy-ass limo of their ex-boyfriend and then notice that said ex-boyfriend FLIRTED BACK AT HER????? on top of using the pet nickname that he gave her when they were dating???? Like him calling Tadano out on his not-really-flirting-but-kind-of-is-flirting-flirting was no unjustified????
AND EVEN AFTER ALL OF THAT MESS OF DRAMA, THE END OF SEASON 4 CONFIRMS (though some would argue that its very ambiguous) THAT THEY'RE STILL IN A RELATIONSHIP. EVEN AFTER THE TAX FRAUD AND MISCOMUNICATION AND NEARLY THROWING YOUR SIGNIFICANT OUT THE WINDOW, THEY'RE STILL GOING OUT.
this is what Gori's soulmate app said about Haida and Retsuko. Even after so much shit, they're able to keep going to work on each other.
Aggrettsuko has stated that multiple times that romance is not a fairy tale, and that it takes work and that you may not get it right on the first time or the third time, but its good to keep working at it.
And Haida and Retsuko are working on it šŸ„ŗ
#i have moments of distaste for haida at times too. but youre supposed to?#i feel the same way about retsuko. bc theyre characters with flaws and nuance. but like....motivation for those flaws!!#pacing-wise i would have enjoyed some fluffy respite of romcom hijinks before the Himura arc which had such high stakes#so the writing isnt perfect either here.#but overall its a lot of bad faith criticisms about the ship and the show itself#and im just like.....i see how yall maybe got some expectations of a more fantasy-oriented story#where Retsuko tells off her misogynistic boss.#rises to fame as the head of a girl group#gets with a young upstart tech guru#but each and every one of those scenarios ended with no payoff or horrific circumstances. on purpose.#and I feel like everyone with these particular criticisms about the show's direction are forgetting WHY none of those ventures worked out#and ignoring how Retsuko's character has changed FOR THE BETTER#maybe not entertainment-wise. but i watch it with a LOT of projecting onto Retsuko (bc shes a lot like me)#and her change in demeanor has delighted me. given me aspirations to be that way. im like ā€œi wonder if therapy can make me be like herā€.#like to all the haters YOURE MISSING THE POINT LMFAO#and i really liked how they deconstructed Haidas character as well. starting with his insecurity issues#and then working on his privilege#all the while Retsuko was supportive. but not playing therapist or doing any of Haida's tough shit for him.#this show is such a gift tbh and i wish folks would stop raining on parades#i came across many of these anti posts in the retsuko x haida tag. like what happened to shipping war truces??#long ass reblog though sorry šŸ˜…
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kinardsboy Ā· 4 months ago
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Prefacing this by saying i donā€™t hate Eddie or buddie in any way, im only tagging this as anti buddie so people can filter out criticism on a ship that they enjoy ā¤ļø
This post doesnt really have a specific theme, Iā€™m just kinda rambling here so bear with me lol
Something that has been bothering me for a while about the gay eddie hc, is that at least the canon basis/evidence for it, is honestly a little homophobic? Most often people claim heā€™s gay because of how he treats women poorly and how many failed relationships heā€™s been in and I just.. first off have you MET a straight man?? šŸ˜­ thats how they are..(For the most part). Secondly itā€™s a negative stereotype that gay men dont treat women well, so having that be one of your main points to make Eddie gay rubs me the wrong way, especially when it comes from non queer men. The other main point I see is the quote ā€œit feels like a performanceā€ but the thing about that quote is , its taken extremely out of context.
He was literally talking about being set up on dates, being FORCED to date instead of letting it happen naturally. Thats what feels like a performance.
I have never understood why Eddie also cant be bisexual if queer at all. he has been clearly shown to enjoy having sex with women.
And another thing that bothers me is that buddie fans shout all the time about wanting whats best for Buck, and then want him shoved in a relationship with a man that has never treated a romantic partner fairly. Again, this isnt Eddie hate but the guy needs serious therapy. Heā€™s a good friend and a good dad, ultimately hes a good person too but heā€™s not a good partner and that wouldnt change just because he dates Buck.
Bobā€™s are constantly forcing a heteronormative role onto Buck, especially when it comes to taking care of Christopher and it just, thats not going to solve anything? Like at all? It really makes me feel like they dont understand mlm relationships at all, and what they look like and how they work, especially based on their reactions to how Tommy and Buck interact.
People probably arent going to like this take, but I see fics or posts that constantly put Christopher as Buckā€™s 1 priority and I just dont think its true. Dont get me wrong I really enjoy the relationship they have, but if any kid on the show has his highest priority, its Jee. Buck spends so much time with Chris because Eddie needs help, if Henren needed help or babysitting more often Buck would seem close to Denny and Mara as well. Im not saying Buck doesnt care or want to hang out with Chris of course, but I feel like people definitely overplay their relationship to an extreme extent. The same goes for buddie in general, especially these last few seasons I dont see buck and Eddie being any closer than eddie and hen or buck and hen or something. Especially considering in 704 Eddie literally didnt invite him to trivia which he knows (or should know) Buck likes lol
And another thing about Christopher is that they turn him into this buddie love child who is SO obsessed with his dadā€™s sexuality and its just so weird to me. They completely strip him of any independence and personality and turn him into this buddie advocate, and then put him away when heā€™s no longer useful or needed. Its ableism. Chris is his own character and his story shouldnt focus around Buddie or his dads romantic endeavors AT ALL.
Anyway if you read all of this thanks for indulging my rambling lol
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tommyssupercoolblog Ā· 9 months ago
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IM SORRY THIS ISNT MEANT TO BE AGGRESSIVE i have not been on this part of the internet in a long time so things might have changed but.... last i heard the proship label encompassed things (in fiction) like inc/st, abusive relationships, p/do shit, etc... is that still correct? idk if thats what you were talking about in your tags because i do not know Anything about minecraft youtubers but usually when people put proship in their dni theyre denouncing that stuff. just wanted to clarify im understanding your complaints, no harm intended!
No problem!! it can be confusing lol, nothing wrong with being unsure. All-in-all, you're kinda close with that idea, but still not on target. explanations of proship vs anti, the d/mp fandom's take on it, and my thoughts on it all under the cut:
So proship as a philosophy is about wether or not things like that (in fiction) translate to real life, which is why it's connected to censorship like i mentioned in the post- if you believe that watching or reading something problematic will make more problematic things happen, that someone reading a book with a child/adult relationship makes them more likely to (or is on it's own already the same as) a person pursuing that in real life, that makes you an anti; and it also gives you a big reason to push for works like that being taken down or removed, and for people who make or read that stuff to be put in real prisons or face other real life consequences for fictional acts- because the idea is that, to an anti, these things bleed into each other.
being proship isn't equivalent to enjoying dark fiction like that, but it IS equivalent to believing that, similar to fictional violence, fictional crimes or acts of any kind can be created and consumed by artists and audiences without people actually condoning it IRL. a proshipper would say that if someone plays a video game where they murder someone, and then does it IRL, thats on the PERSON, not the media- and they hold the same position for fictional portrayals of incest, abusive relationships, and pedophilic relationships. the name comes from being pro- as in for- ships, and other content, as a whole; without it having to meet IRL moral criteria.
dark fiction freaks me out personally; the biggest ick (and actually a trigger for me) being incest; It bothers me and i stay away from it. but I don't think that people who read or make it are going to condone it IRL directly because of that media, and I believe that if they WERE to do something bad like abusing someone, it'd be an unrelated/seperate issue: an independent choice that only they are responsible for, not anything they made or watched or read.
That makes me fall under proship, even though I don't like any problematic (as in incest, abuse, adult/minor) ships. Personally, I literally follow people who like things that bother me in that way: i just block the tags so when they post something i really don't wanna see, tumblr tells me, hey, this post has this thing in it so we've spoilered it. If someone likes shipping their silly little blorbos and those silly little blorbos are kinda fucked up in a way that makes their brain go brrr, that's totally chill with me as long as they aren't hurting anyone- which, because i don't think fiction equates to reality, I believe they aren't when they're playing with their blorbos. (and since i'm pro-rpf, it's worth mentioning i feel the same about that. rpf is still FICTION, at the end of the day. you don't actually expect those people to do the things you write or draw. it's still removed from reality. that's personal preference though, many proshippers would disagree.)
So basically proship or Anti is a label that represents your philosophy on how human thoughts and behavior link to fiction. anti means you believe that consuming something fictional is equivalent to doing it in real life, or at least will make you do it IRL later, while proship means you believe that consuming something fictional is unrelated to doing it IRL, and you can enjoy something fictionally without actually enjoying it or condoning it when it's real people.
you will, of course, see more people who enjoy dark fiction under proship, and that's because they themselves consume it- so of course they're going to say it's not the same as doing it IRL. You will also, of course, see more people who don't like dark fiction at all under anti, because when you're disgusted by something like that then that reaction can be taken as "evidence" that it's morally bad. (personally, disgust-based morality doesn't hold up as a concept for me- it's a big reason why bigots believe the things they do, so using the same logic path makes me uncomfortable, but it is still common for people to use it as a way to measure wether something is okay or not.)
so, the part about silly block game.
there's lots of censoring in this part to avoid harassment, so bear with me.
In the early days of the d/mp, people decided that creating romantic content around the b-nchtr-o (Tmmy, tvbb0, and rnb00, who were all around 16 at the time) was inherently problematic. I'm not sure why, exactly, but the idea became that a fan crushing on one of them (at the exact same age!!!) or shipping them with each other, even as characters, was equivalent to being a real life child predator. again, even if the person doing it was ALSO a minor.
because it was seen as inherently problematic, behaviors like those were lumped in with other things problematic- shipping characters on the smp who had fought or killed each other, shipping characters who were related or were minor/adult, etc. there was no distinction; i was there!! it was all problematic, and all of it was seen as evidence that you were a real life predator of some kind regardless of age or disclaimers put under your content.
the label that developed for this group of "problematic content" enjoyers within the fandom became "poppytwt" or "ppytwt". (twt being there because it was mainly localized around twitter). as i explained above, because it could be because of dark fiction OR be//htr/o content, poppytwt content and ships doesn't even require it being dark fiction necessarily, nor does it require it being b//chtr/o; just one or the other, although usually the assumption is that it's both, since that combines the two reasons for being under that label. some people also call any proshippers in the fandom poppy even if they don't engage in anything problematic in-fandom, but that's generally the antis and not people themselves. if someone self describes as poppy, it's for the two main reasons above.
Additionally, the d/mp fandom has this concept of "maintagging". what this means is that if you make problematic content, you are NOT ALLOWED to tag it under the fandoms or characters it's about, because people don't want to see it in their results. ao3 has a tag filtering feature for this exact purpose, but people generally disregaurd that; you're still not supposed to tag it on the "main" tags, and doing so is seen almost like "asking for" harassment, like how some people talk about wearing crop tops alone at night.
Tntd/o managed to cross over, actually, from poppy to main/normalized in the fandom as the creators leaned into it with their characters. but for awhile even that was considered poppy.
different members of ppytwt have different opinions on RPF, but RPF was also considered poppy on it's own sometimes depending on who you were talking to and how militant they were on what got a pass and what didn't.
as be/chtr/o aged....it didn't stop?? all of them hit 18, but still, to this day, you can be cancelled for shipping them with each other or ANYONE else. it's why i'm so damn scared of the d/mp fandom, if i tagged a fic about my source with his character tag, with ANYTHING other than platonic relationships for him/me, I run the risk of being sent threats or doxxed- don't get me wrong, many antis keep to themselves, but there are also those who try to play vigilante- remember, if something fictional is equivalent to IRL, then attacking someone for enjoying a "bad" fictional thing becomes a charitable, heroic act; so sometimes antis might pursue proshippers with the goal of keeping people "safe". Many people in related fandoms or under the same creators also adopted the same ideals handed down from the d/mp fandom, so i'm wary of people who just watch my source too, or of people who like the q/mp.
people joke about the old fandom going crazy if they say tvbb0 and tmmy today, and that's because they would. they'd be furious at tmmy for doing this bit and putting himself in danger, they'd be cancelling anyone who ran with the bit in chat or had a photo of them hugging or kissing like in the music video as a profile picture, it'd be a whole mess. even today though it's still...scary.
((paused there to take a strawberry milk break, im back now))
the somewhat exception to this rule is Rnb00- people literally thirst for them and make nsfw comments openly, so while im not sure about the shipping aspect, i do know simping is widely okay- you couldn't even say you wanted to kiss them before, but now people are saying wayyy more than that...
inversely, i feel like my source has it the worst, because people won't even talk about him- or anything related to him- as an adult. it's always child this and child that, "who let him drink" and "get the alcohol away from the baby!", and of couse "don't ship him or his character with anyone that makes you a pedophile!!!" while the grown ass man they're talking about outright says he's alright with sfw fanfiction in a video where he reacts to someone's x-reader and then makes flirty nsfw jokes with every other adult man in the vicinity. every fanfic is platonic and almost all of them both irl and in game write him as sixteen. they take place in the past or, more commonly, they just straight up age him down. hell, sometimes they even age him down to like eight. even in fics where he IS an adult, he gets called a child or a teenager but never an adult.
poppytwt, like the stigma against writing for the creators or their characters, lives on. and even outside of benchtrio, again, ships between other characters that are problematic are poppytwt, so that also is still clinging on for dear life in some corners of the web. most poppytwt posts that are tagged as such usually include b//chtr/o, but not all of them; and it's worth noting many creators avoid tagging at all even if it's just the poppytwt tag, because they don't want to get swarmed.
because I ship myself with my husband of course, and also make fictional content with our sources as an extension of that (think dungeons and dragons but the character is just you...or, actually, SMPs are a great example of this since the appearance/name is generally the same, so think like an SMP!!!!!) I am poppytwt. I will always be poppytwt to most people who don't like poppytwt. and I have friends who are poppytwt and I like art made by people under poppytwt. I don't need to ship incest to be a part of that, i just need to not think the people who do aren't doing anything harmful when they ship that, and to write/draw....well, anything about septicinnit, which i do all the time.
if someone has poppytwt dni in their bio, i can't interact. if someone has proship dni in their bio, i can't interact. it doesn't matter if what they really mean is "people who like abusive ships because that triggers me", I still can't interact.
Because i think we SHOULD be tagging our content exactly so that we can filter it and find what we personally enjoy (and avoid what we dont), the concept of a DNI is technically something i'm kinda for- it is a way of monitoring and controlling your experience- but it also can be used as an excuse to harass people who forgot to read it, and i have no way of knowing if that's the case in advance.
ADITTIONALLY, because I know and care about people who consume dark fiction, I also don't want to be around people who think that makes them a bad person, regaurdless of wether or not they think i can stay. and "proship dni" is about proship, that fiction isn't reality philosophy- they are saying right out of the gate that they think it DOES make them a bad person. and I don't agree with that. it frustrates me and it makes me upset. those DNIs are based in a place of disgust and hatred for the people I care about, because of content that isn't real, and i'm never going to feel super okay with that...
there's people who don't understand what it means and use it anyway when it's really just about the content; but again, how am i supposed to know which is which?? ESPECIALLY on twitter, the anti philosophy is extremely popular and relevant and yes, trendy. people believe it, HARD, and so i can't assume they don't when they say they do. I've met real flesh and blood people in person who think that way, so if you are using these words, i'm assuming you know what they mean- that way I don't run the risk of making an actual anti upset and violating their boundaries.
you don't have to agree with me on this- if you're anti, then that's your worldview and i'm not going to change that. but that's what those words mean, the history of the block game side of things, and how they're correlated to censorship.
To Summarize:
Anti : Fiction Equals Reality so Fictional Crimes are Real Crimes (ergo we should censor them to stop the crimes)
Proship: Fiction does NOT Equal Reality so Fictional Crimes are Harmless (on their own)
Anti-Anti: Not sure if Fictional Crimes are Harmless, but Don't Like that Antis think Proshippers are The Exact Same Level as IRL Criminals
Poppytwt/ppytwt: Problematic silly block game stuff, OR things that have to do with these three specific block people being hot/dating someone. Sometimes both.
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cosmossystem Ā· 6 months ago
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Hey, I'm sorry for suddenly dumping this onto your askbox, but I just feel the need to be heard
I honestly don't care about being anti and proship at all
But... Everytime I see a post from someone who proudly calling themselves anti... It's always so scarily violent
All those posts saying "kill yourself", "deserves to die", all of that stuff
If you don't like a person or stuff they make... Just block them, mute the tags they use, forget they ever exist
Literally easier to do that than harassing the said person or making others uncomfortable with your violence tendencies
This is why some people that have "I'm an anti" or "Proship dni" have become such a redflag to me, even tho most of the time people who uses them are genuinely just good people who misunderstood what proship is
I wish this whole discourse never existed, I miss everything before 2020...
^^ this
and we feel the exact same way
like we dont have any hard stances on shipcourse because both sides have misinfo and both are wrong about some things-- like, we are firmly anti-lolisho and thats one of the things that is usually seen as "proship", but we do have "problematic" ships and we believe in SALS and are anti-censorship. so much misinfo flies between the two because no one cares about being right, they care about looking right, much like every other fake-activist (which are unfortunately common these days.)
the only reason we even care to begin with is because antis have been so violent to us about it. if you arent with them, youre against them, and if youre against them, youre a target.
it seems like theres a lot of antis in neurodivergent & plural spaces, too, which is just crazy to me, so it feels like we have to specify every time "yes, we're the proship in your DNI, just block us please."
i do wanna say that while 2020 made things worse, ive been in shipcourse + fandom spaces since 2016 and it was pretty bad back then too. like in 2016 i had an anti-ship & anti-ddlg blog and there were DOZENS of other antis in the tags -- yall remember "character-against-bad-ships" blogs? yeah. we ran several of those and had hundreds of mutuals running them as well. (im getting flashbacks to "sonic-for-real-justice". eugh.)
we Fully Converted To Proshipism (/j) in about 2018-19, so i saw how bad it was getting right before covid and honestly its never fully recovered. fandom hasnt really been peaceful since... maybe before 2016? i dont know, i wasnt there. flaming and ship wars have always been around but i honestly cant think of when all this "pro v anti" stuff started. seems like it was a slow buildup and now its just fucking everywhere.
i know this wasnt the point of your ask, but im gonna go on a tangent here because i like to yap:
i think the current state of shipcourse is caused, in part, by the fact that younger generations are getting into fandom. except, i think every time someone points this out, they get it wrong and pin it on some bullshit like "younger fans are mistaking fandom for activism/politics!" that argument sucks because that doesnt afford any empathy to the teenagers and young adults who grew up in this awful fucking political climate (including myself.) fandom IS politics to young people, because they have been aware of the state of the world since the time they could read and dont know a world that isnt inherently political in every way.
and then that brings up the misconception that fandom isnt / should never be political, which isnt true and is literally just denial of what is already happening. every form of media and consumption is inherently political. proshippers tend to be wrong about that, plug their ears and lalala until it goes away while ignoring the very political parts of fandom-- like the misogyny, racism, ableism, aphobia... etc.
and so we get stuck in the same song and dance because everyone is wrong and parrots the same disinfo. fandom is very black and white like that. its either everything is ok, or none of it is, with no room for nuance. like for instance: you can enjoy shipping the canonically-aroace character with someone and that doesnt make you a bad person, but dont pretend that doesnt have any real world implications. and so on.
anyway. thank you for the ask, anon. sorry this got really long and passionate. im very opinionated.
- red
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dittolicous Ā· 2 years ago
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I've been thinking a lot about the whole purity culture struggle thing re: incest/twincest because of submas and while I absolutely get the issue of slippery slope censorship + how dark topics are not inherently bad, I feel like a lot of the issues people have in incest ships isn't neccarily with the actual incest portion, but actually the constant denial & erasure of deep platonic love, yet all shipper focus on is censorship or antis or 'being too sensative' etc...
for example, every goddamn year around Christmas people roll out the 'incest folgers commercial' and every goddamn year I have to practice my breathing so as to not lose my shit because why the fuck can a little sister not love her damn brother and be elated to see him again? why does that mean she wants to fuck him? why are we okay with belittling familial relationships, demanding they only show their love in a certain way?
just because you don't have that kind of relationship with your sibling doesn't mean no one does.
this can also be seen in found families and/or adopted families, as well as nonconforming queer-platonic relationships. so why is it not something to be had and acknowledged in creations?
another example is the batfam (aka the Waynes & co). despite Bruce CANONICALLY adopting various robins/sidekicks, people constantly deny they're siblings, shipping them with each other. and even with Bruce.
because 'it's not by blood'. because oh, whats the platonic explanation for such-and-such?
because platonic love is only allowed to be shown in one way, and if they do otherwise, if they consider them just as important, well clearly they're in ~romantic~ love.
its.... really demoralizing to say that if you care about someone a little too much, that means you want to fuck them. that's how we build a society that is lonely, divided, and lacking in a loving community, because the only love we put credit in is single, romantic love.
the tier list of relationships isn't 'romantic partner > family > friends'. in a better world, they're all equal to a point and given proper attention to sustain a healthy relationship altogether. just like gender or autism, love is a spectrum that we shouldn't demand conformity of.
and, ok, how does this relate back to submas?
I think a lot of the b-----kshippers really don't understand just how upsetting and even triggering it can be to have them interact with non-shipping stuff.
like... how many people base their work on their own siblings, on things they've experienced in their family? so a person make a submas comic or fic based on a memory with their own siblings. they're happy, want to share it, and we'll of course creators want to see what others think of their creations!
until they see tags or comments about how 'there's no platonic explanation' or how 'in love' they are or, hell, even just the simple tag noting the ship.
on a piece created after a real-life experience with their sibling.
that can shift the entire vibe, not only of the work and characters, but also the creator. now they're having their family relationship twisted & denied. will they stop creating for these characters? will they pull away from their siblings so no one ever claims they love them in that way?
idk
I know that in my own writing, I constantly stop and question how close i make Ingo and Emmet, how their relationship may be viewed, despite it all being written 100% platonic. and it's agitating that I struggle with that, because it makes me feel so utterly gross that people look at what I make and deny that any other love is possible.
that also comes through in how I interact with creations of others, because I do not want to accidentally interact with something that twists platonic love languages or denies them. and i think people who ship such things demand understanding for their 'whys' without stopping to consider that maybe these 'antis' have reasons beyond 'ew incest taboo!'
what can we do? again, idk. censorship isnt..isn't... something im down with. but I think that those who do ship it need to be just as critical of how they interact with it and the fandom at large, because they impact our art just as much as we impact theirs.
there is a time and place for all creations.
don't act like disliking or wanting no interaction with them makes them pathetic or... whatever. you have your reason, we have ours. a trigger is still a trigger, even if the trauma it comes from is the menial yet constant societal pressure for romance to trump all other relationships.
so please look critically at how you interact with others too. don't view my stuff as bl------shipping. just... block me and move on. or whatever.
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communistkenobi Ā· 2 years ago
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re: your recent post iā€™ve found s4 of the vampire shadows show (not writing the acronym to avoid showing up in tags) has been really disappointing so far and has had some of the weakest episodes to date for the entire series. but i wonā€™t post my opinions on s4 to the internet for fear of people getting wayyy too mad about it
like every time i look in the tag i get the feeling itā€™s one of those fandoms that allows ā€˜positivityā€™ only and is laser focused on shipping and shipping only, which is why i avoid that fandom like the plague :(
obviously other viewers donā€™t have to agree with me but i find it interesting that tumblr fans of the show seem blind to this seasonā€™s glaring flaws (in my opinion). to me a lack of any criticism whatsoever is a sign that thereā€™s something wrong with the way people engage in fan discussion, you know?
not sure if this is your issue with that fandom as well but ya
yeah same its been fun but the show is showing some wear and tear. and like theres only so much material for a comedy show about vampires with that specific set up so its starting to feel a bit stale. and like re: my last post, more than just the writing being kinda weak, the show feels like its fandomising itself. and maybe this is a boomer opinion but i do not want art or media to reflect the wishes of fandom (in this case shipping preferences), i want to consume a piece of art without being reminded that i am the audience and the author is aware of me and wants to cater to my whims. i want to see YOUR vision thats why im consuming the art you made. if i wanted my artistic preferences reflected back at me i would make art myself. and fandom seems to have reached a point where creators have become aware of how marketable they are & are consciously taking "fandom" into account when producing art. like obviously artists have always been aware of their audiences, i know this isnt a new process, but with shows like this one and the gay pirate show there seems to be a conscious effort to intentionally produce a fandom and generate a response to a piece of media via fandom norms and trends. idk if im making any sense and im not like an anti fandom person or whatever i just dislike that fandom itself has become this thing that is slowly being subsumed into larger media production as a thing to consciously contend with. i like being removed from the author of a piece of work and want my enjoyment and critical reflection on it to be wholly separate from them, in a place they will never see
idk i have contradictory opinions on this because i do enjoy engaging with people online about media (obviously) and participating in fandom spaces for fun, but like i dont really want it to be taken seriously outside of posting about it online
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ancsidcra Ā· 7 years ago
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kylo ren stans are wild. like i get that u might like the character because heā€™s interesting and complex and shit but stop with the ā€œheā€™s just a misunderstood kitten uwu heā€™s a precious boy heā€™s so adorableā€ bullshit. heā€™s the representation of a neo nazi mass shooter. heā€™s killed millions of people. u say u like him fine but donā€™t brush off what heā€™s done. heā€™s an abusive killer so donā€™t try to romanticize him or make him look like heā€™s an innocent and sweet little boy.
heā€™s a villain accept him as such. heā€™s way past redemption. like this isnā€™t happening.
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Iā€™d disagree with the anon that Paul was ā€œincapableā€ of love, but I do agree he was very distanced, and pretty cruel (to women) when he was younger. (It was unfortunate they bought into the love at first sight myth, but he was also a charmer, and dropped affection and got colder after fucking them.)
But I just canā€™t see romantic interest on Paulā€™s end. Iā€™m sure he loved John, but a lot of the ā€œsexual/Romantic evidenceā€ really can just be as construed as platonic love. I feel there may be some confirmation bias looking for ā€œcluesā€. (Not an attack on anyone, but some of the analysises seem to try too hard, really).
He does make references, with the whole ā€œcalling him babe during concertsā€, and ā€œin bedā€ but that could just mean heā€™s not uncomfortable with coming off ā€œgayā€. He has a quote about it somewhere I think. Heā€™s supportive of the community at any rate.
This is kind of my own bias, but at times I think heā€¦plays it up a little during the present day? Again, Iā€™m positive he did love John a lot, but with how he is, a charmer, good at manipulating his image, he knows there is a benefit to building up the ā€œmagicalā€ Lennon McCartney dynamic. Johnā€™s dead, and the old conflicts have faded, so he has no reason not to. I donā€™t think heā€™s anti-social, or a psycho or anything, but he certainly does put a lot of thought into his image, especially now, with how he wants to leave his legacy.
Iā€™m less knowledgeable about John, and the speculation about his mental illnesses, but on his end, I can certainly see it. Maybe heā€™s just blind, but the looks are very muchā€¦yeah. He does seem to rely Paul a lot, and hold him in very high regard (REGARDLESS of what those old male biographers might make of him). You just know he was suffering over Paul, poor bastard.
Not sure if anything happened. I think Paul knew though, and either ignored it, or was kind, knowing John wouldnā€™t act on it. OR he didnā€™t notice! With the whole ā€œwe shared beds A LOT. you would think heā€™d make a pass at me, darling~ā€
I guess thatā€™s how I see it. I donā€™t really have strong feelings on the nature of their relationship, or want them to be ā€œconfirmedā€, so I try to be as objective as possible! Not a shipper, but not a male biographer. In fact, I was very put off learning the ship was a thing at first! With every fan base ā€œhaving toā€ ship the main male leads, thatā€™s what I thought this was. But after three years, reading actual books, primary stuff, Iā€™ve began to change my mind on its legitimacy, and this was my conclusion. But new information can always change!
(Sorry for the long long analysis, god! I just took my adderall and I should go eat! Feel free to block me for spam/harassment.)
Yeah, this is basically my big mclennon dilemma: did Paul love John?
Of course he loved him, but I mean did he harbour any homosexual feelings towards John - and I just go back and fourth on that a lot.
In my last response to an anon I wasnā€™t necessarily trying to argue that Paul was romantically/sexually attached to John, because all in all, I donā€™t believe he did - but it probably came off that way because I didnā€™t particularly like the way the anon had phrased some stuff (like calling him ā€œa master manipulatorā€ and ā€œincapable of loveā€) and so I just sort of wanted to show that the relationship was more nuanced then just ā€œjohn was simping for paulā€. My overall point with that response was more so that whilst I think Paul struggles in showing real affection and emotions, I donā€™t think he was incapable of love prior to Linda. I think he did really love John (in whichever form of love you want to take it: romantically, platonically etc.)
And so my point I guess wasnt so much that Paul was always capable of love (because I think he did at least love his family, his close-friends, probably Jane etc.), but maybe more so that he was always capable of intimacy with another person, though he struggled with it.
But yeah, he was quite cruel to a lot of the girls he slept with in the 60s, but I wouldnā€™t say that suggests he was incapable of love (i know thats not what youā€™re saying but other people might interpret it through that lens) I would just say he was young, dumb, ridiculously rich and famous and not emotionally mature enough yet to really empathise with most of those girls. Not trying to completely excuse him, but like, i dunno, i always just try to view people from the most human perspective. Everyones an twat sometimes yknow
I also really struggle to see romance on Pauls behalf towards John - the only times I think ā€œwait but maybe he did fancy john backā€ is when I read some of his lyrics (like in ā€˜Coming Upā€™, ā€˜Yvonneā€™s The Oneā€™, and to some extent ā€˜Here Todayā€™ - though I think interpreting Here Today as strictly platonic love is still a valid interpretation). I mentioned this in a different post though, that analysing his lyrics just isnt particularly convincing for me, because it feels more like speculation - and also as someone who does write songs, I know that a lot of lyrics just arent as deep as we wish they were. It is really difficult to be truly introspective and honest in a song, without exaggerating or hyperbolising or fictionalising any autobiographical aspects.
I do see your point with Paul possibly playing up the ā€œLennon/McCartney m a g i cā€ - im not entirely sure how much I agree, but I do agree to some extent. I think heā€™s always been very image conscious, and being in what is probably the all-time most famous pop band definitely wouldve heightened that. Even as a teenager I think heā€™s always just had this natural charm about him, and that tends to stem I guess from a need to be liked; I think you can see it in every interview heā€™s ever done to be honest. Its not necessarily a bad thing, (because id take a charmer over a rude knobhead any day) but I guess it sort of just shows that Paul is flawed like everybody else. Also, just read @mothernatures-sons tags and I agree with her - Paul just knows when to be a nice person! Nothing wrong with that! It isnt manipulative like the last anon suggested, its just how most people are: polite :) Ive heard a lot of anecdotes from people who have worked with or met Paul and the majority of them say he was a just a nice guy. Not saying he was never an arsehole (cause yeah he was pretty cruel to those girls in the 60s) but I think overall, hes a pretty good guy šŸ‘
On the other hand though, you could also say that superficial journalists are looking for superficial answers - and Paul knows what the people want to hear. But occasionally ill hear an interview that does seem more intimate then most - I havent listened to it in awhile, but the interview he did with Sean I remember felt more honest to me then most. And when he said heā€™d like to spend the day ā€œin bedā€ with John, to me that felt like a genuine and fitting response. Because, whilst it has sexual connotations, it also just feels like heā€™s saying heā€™d just like to sit around, chat, dont chat, just whatever with John for a day. Like he would just like another moment of intimacy with him.
I think we are pretty much in agreement on most of this though! At first I was also like ā€œnah, mclennon isnt real, teenage girls just love shipping guys!ā€ (I am a teenaged girl and I can confirm this lol) but then it just sort of became apparent to me through reading more and more about their relationship that there probably was something more on Johns behalf. If John wasnt in love with Paul, then it feels as though a lot of things he said and did just dont add up (the big one for me is him marrying Yoko so soon after Paul married Linda - like I really cannot come up with a heterosexual explanation for that!)
But when it comes to Paul, though ill have moments of doubt, I dont think he was in love with John (homosexually) and I do think a lot of the evidence on Pauls behalf seems like a stretch (but like you, im not having a go at anyone, because I understand that it is easy to carried away, plus its fun - but realistically, most of Pauls evidence just is not convincing to me). Heā€™s comfortable with his sexuality, and I really do try to respect that and not force a gay interpretation of quotes or songs from him, unless it is genuinely making me question his sexuality and mclennon.
PS dont worry, I didnā€™t take this is spam at all!! And also, I would never block someone just for disagreeing with me! I enjoy discussion and I think its good to engage with people who disagree with you! To be honest, id only block someone if they were purposely being a real arsehole <3
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toaster-hair Ā· 2 years ago
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i try my BEST not to let fandom get in my way of how i view ships bc i always see ships in a non canonical way. so if you want you can fold a ship into whatever way you want whether its aus, fix it fics, or whatever. i especially try not to let the popularity of a ship get in the way of how much i like a ship, im very fond of rarepairs and crackships but i dont consider myself someone who cant bring themselves to like popular ships or even brags about liking.. ANYTHING that isnt mainstream
but there comes a POINT where when ALL of the content you see for a character youre fond of is ABOUT A SINGLE SHIP that you start hating the ship and maybe even the other character involved. it hurts even more when its a ship you fell out of love with.
yes, im talking soudam AGAIN bc kazuichi has rotted my brain so badly that i feel like i cant even go a single day without thinking of him, AND I BARELY EVEN INTERACT W/ THE DR FANDOM ANYMORE. one of my ocs was just a genderbent au i made of him that looked distinct enough i just took it and ran. thats how bad it is. (tbh i do just like the color pink and... sharp.. teeth.. so thats probably why. hes pathetic too which just makes it x2 as good)
look, i dont think that ppl who ship soudam are inherently bad ppl. i dont really care about what ppl ship as long as theyre 1) not shipping real ppl and 2) not shoving it in other peoples faces. and i dont see any soudam shippers directly doing that. i was a soudam shipper, and honestly, i can see why ppl ship it. its an interesting dynamic.
bbbutt.. i dont ship it!Ā  i personally dont care for it anymore, or even just general dr stuff. i should probably get into dr stuff more sense i feel like other than skullgirls and cookie run, im a bit lost when it comes to fandoms nowadays. but i still really like kazuichi and, by extension, sonia and their ship sounia. so every now and then i look for content abt them whether its for comfort or horniness, or just bc i want to. and a big theme i see is soudam. everywhere. its not unbareable especially on a site like tumblr where i can block certain tags and words. but even with that blocking, soudam can still clog it up meaning its harder for me to find content i like.
its even worse when some of that content is intentionally made to spam tags. an example would be what happened on instagram a while back, im not sure if that many other people noticed it, where ppl would spam dr ship tags with things such asĀ ā€œhey ur ship sucks xoxoā€, feet, and in the worst case scenario, gore and self harm.
its even worse (take a sip everytime i say that) when you bring in stuff like antis and proshippers which, IS A CAN OF WORMS I DO NOT WANT TO GO INTO. i dont use either label, i hate antis but i really fucking hate proshippers. which is why i dont like ppl labeling all sounia shippers as proshippers because.. no. no i am not. you cant dictate what side someone is on in a silly shipping war based of a single thing they like. i know damn well there are sounia shippers who are proship, anti, somewhere in the middle, and the same can be said abt soudam shippers. which is why i hate how soudam shippers are seen as morally good and sounia shippers are seen as gross. i just wanna see some pathetic lil guy try and fail to woo a girl, i dont wanna argue about what ship is superior. neither are illegal, so they are both equal.Ā Ā 
in conclusion; there are and will be a lot of soudam shippers. i dont care. i just want to be left alone, but soudam is hard to ignore. dont try to call any soudam shippers poopyheads, lets all just try to be nice and respect one another. sorry if this seems like a hate rant, because it is. i am frustrated. didnt mean for this to become an 8 paragraph essay, but thats just what happened.Ā 
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hello-yue-here Ā· 4 years ago
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Yuetara, zukka, and maiko
yuetara
ship
1) its not one of my main ships. i dont rlly read fanfic for them but if i see a cute fanart of them ill enjoy it and i think i first started shipping it because of good fanarts for them.
2) i like yuetara because of how similar they are. theyre both women from the water tribe. they both understand the misogyny that they have faced. and they both said f sexism im gonna be a strong woman. i also love the tui and la parallel. moon spirit and ocean spirit parallel COME ON. YUE IS THE MOON. KATARA IS THE MOST POWERFUL WATERBENDER. THEY ARE THE OCEAN AND THE MOON. the push and pull they could give eachother. that dynamic ftw.
3) i guess if i didnt like something about this ship would be the fact that if i read a fic or see a fanart w yuetara then than means in that particular au i wont get any yuekka and yuekka is probably my second favorite ship. but then again if i get yuetara than i could get a plethora of other sokka ships to go with it so my sadness disappears in like two seconds. gosh shipping is hard sometimes until you remember ā€˜hey i have like fifty different universes in my head. all ur ships can coexist in ur brain oliviaā€™ other than that i really see no downsides to this ship. maybe i wish it had more content. maybe if it had more content id ship it a lot more but its not one of the more popular ships so the content is kinda few n far between on my feed.
zukka:
SHIPPP
1) my boys. my babies. my loves. i watched this show for the first time when it came out on netflix and when it ended i really didnt ship anything other than kataang. i came onto tumblr to find fun atla content and one of the very first things i saw under the atla tag was zukka content. i was like oh? whats this? zukka? interesting... i was intrigued so i found a list of fic recs and i fell in love with the ship. the rest is history. its probably my number one ship because it was my very first ship here and im nostalgic
2) oh boy there is so much i like about this ship. i relate to a shit ton of characters in atla. but sokka and zuko may be the ones i relate to most. i relate to sokka because i tend to feel second best a lot to my friends. i try to stay positive but things rarely go the way i plan or hope for them too and while im happy for my friends and their achievements i oftentimes find myself thinking why cant that be me? and i see this a lot in sokka especially in sokkas master. i dont feel special a lot and idk seeing sokka feel the same way and then realizing he is special kinda helped me realize that im special too. on the flipside i relate to zuko because i have wild anger issues and difficulty dealing w my emotions a lot as well. i get broody and short tempered and insecure very often and i tend to push people away and i refuse to ask for help (the amount of teachers and adults and therapists who have told me its okay to ask for help ur not any weaker because of it is astounding. do i listen to them? .....im working on it.) and i saw a shit ton of this in zuko. book one and two zuko rarely asks for help as seen in the blue spirit and zuko alone and he pushes away uncle so many times and even when the gaang iffers to help him in i think its the chase he tells them to leave. when he finally has his redemption and joins the gaang and lets them kinda become a better person i was so happy. i want that for myself yk. seeing him finally win the agni kai and overcome his family that always told him he was nothing was such a win. my sister and i get along but when we were children we were very much like zuko and azula. it was extremely competitive all the time and there was so much toxicity and sibling drama to a concerning extent. we get along great now which im very happy about but yeah their sibling relationship hit a lil too on the nose for me. seeing as i relate to these character so much and want them ti be happy i want to live vicariously through them so seeing them together is amazing for me to project into them. i love projecting onto fictional characters and with them i can project onto BOTH so its a winwin. plus so many zukka fics are so well written and heartwarming and heartbreaking and emotional and fluffy anf UGH the talent here us astounding.
3) what do i not like about the ship? again the list is long. oops. mainly the toxic shippers. there are so many toxic zukka stans that sometimes make it hard for me to enjoy this ship but hey! thats what the block button is for:) i despise how often people infantilize zuko and completely ruin his character for the sake of making him a soft weak lil boy who needs protecting. thats just not zuko for me. and ive seen many many accounts even state that this kind of portrayal of zuko is rooted in racist stereotypes about asian men (now i am white so i personally have never experiences racism but i feel the need to bring that up because it is wrong and attention needs to be brought to it because a lot of poc fans have criticised this) and the same for sokka. some ppl rlly skew his character and make him a big strong brute and hypermasculine and once again poc fans have said that this take is rooted in racist stereotypes. again! these are just my opinions! this is my favorite ship! but i think its important to acknowledge some of the bad parts of our ships as well and be critical where criticism is needed :))
maiko
ship
1) I LOVE MAIKO. ā€œi dont hate youā€ ā€œi dont hate you tooā€ BRUH. my little heart just burst into flames. im sorry guys but maiko is so cute. they hate everything except eachother. BRUH that is one of the cutest tropes. i shipped them the moment i saw them together onscreen and i was so happy when zukos face lit up in the finale when mai came back.
2) ā€œi hate everything but i have a soft spot for youā€ TAKE MY MONEY I AM A SUCKER FOR THIS. they are so cute together. like zuko is rarely happy in a majority of atla but mai makes him happy and i- šŸ„ŗšŸ„ŗ HE DESERVES IT. and mai is always so supportive of him. when hes stressing out about the war meeting she tries her best to comfort him. and zuko cares about her too. he may not be the best at showing it but oh my god hes TRYING HIS BEST. i think its a very accurate portrayal of teenage relationships because they arent perfect and they do fight but like,, every teenage relationship does that. and even after everything and how he left her in the fire nation she still had his back at boiling rock. she still risked her life against azula to save his butt.
3) the thing i hate about maiko isnt even about maiko. its about antis who think mai is toxic and that zuko deserves better. that has got to be the worst take ive ever heard. they had a fight in ember island. that is NORMAL. they are teenagers. they are not perfect. but underneath all the rough edges and things they need to work out they still care about eachother so freaking much. i genuinelt believe that neither of them would do anything to intentionally hurt the other and i think thats what matters the most. if anything mai is the best girlfriend in the entire world because zuko fucked up like,, quite a few times. he got rlly jealous and dumped her thru a letter and ppl always say that mai was toxic for being mad at him for those two things. umm she had every right to be mad at him for both of those. and while zuko is allowed to feel his emotions and be angry sometimes as well sometimes he needs to think things thru and realize that hey maybe some if this jealousy is unfounded. BUT EVEN THEN. HE RESPECTED HER FEELINGS AND DIDNT TOUCH HER WHEN SHE SAID DONT TOUCH ME. HE RESPECTED HER. so i hate toxic maiko takes because they are literally so wrong in my opinion.
again all of these are just my opinions!! feel free to agree or disagree but please be respectful!! i will respect whatever u think as well because this is all just for fun :)
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izzyliker Ā· 4 years ago
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hey - this is one of the mods of the bi jon project. we don't actually dislike or disagree with pan jon at all, we just want to make a project focused on and celebrating bisexuality. our carrd is a bit rambling, but frankly we were trying our best/overcompensating to try and make sure people didn't misunderstand us and do - well, this. our intentions are good, and it's really kind of disenheartening to see all the hate we've gotten for what was meant to be a positive project. (1)
you're under no obligation to answer these, but i saw some of your posts in the tag and felt like reaching out because you did give us even the tiniest bit of slack in good faith. honestly, if you have any advice about what in our carrd is so overwhelmingly bad, we'd be happy to hear it. we've been trying to respond to the overwhelming amount of criticism we've got in a positive way, and take peoples' suggestions. (2)
as for why 'no anti-antis' was at the bottom of our rules list, it's legitimately bc we were trying so hard to be preventative about this negativity that we forgot to add it when we first posted the blog, and just remembered later. again, you're under no obligation to answer these, i just feel like no one's really actually letting us defend ourselves/are taking things in as bad faith a way as possible. (3)
im not exactly sure how the posts showed up in the tag bc ive been very purposefully not tagging them, also ive blocked all of you back (not sure why you blocked me if you actually want feedback, so it seems more like you just want free positive pr and not actual feedback) so its unlikely youll see whatever it is that i reply to this but whatever.Ā 
the issues have all been repeatedly brought up to you so i dont really see how me repeating all of them once again could help. when i last looked at the cardd the things that stood out immediately included.Ā 
pitting ace & bi identities and people against each other REPEATEDLY,Ā Ā 
starting off with a guilt trippy tone and maintaining it throughout (in my experience this is the #1 best way to receive backlash because people do not want to participate in events where you feel like youre being guilted into it, which going into scrutinizing detail over there not being enough content and passing judgement onto authors or artists over it is something that comes across as guilt trippy.),
repeatedly equating asexuality with sex repulsion (not to get into the misleading information about modteam aspec identity breakdowns, since you claimed that 3/4 of the team are aspec, which is technically correct, but what you didnt say was that only one is acespec. surely you know that [allosexual] aro and [alloromantic] ace are not interchangeable) and calling using biromantic over bisexual a ā€œmisunderstandingā€ of the identity as if how to define romantic vs sexual attraction (how to divide, if or if not to divide, use interchangeably different labels) isnt a deeply personal choice ace people who experience romantic attraction make,Ā 
claiming that bisexual jon is canon (he isnā€™t. this is why people are suspicious of anti-other mspec identities sentiments. which theyre right, if youll be so kind as to stick around til the last paragraph) and repeatedly implying that the reason there isnt ā€œenoughā€ content centering bi jon because the aces are simply unable to not fixate on his asexuality (again, pitting identities against each other),
making the banned ship list way needlessly confusing and including ships that dont even include jon to it, which simply comes across as some kind of a list of bad ships, idk. a way to bypass this would simply be to sayĀ ā€œwe are looking for portrayals of healthy relationships!ā€ and that couldve just been it. if you felt that that wouldnt exclude specific ships (eg. jondaisy that a lot of people write as a relationship between trauma survivors who have done very bad things trying to get better and learning to trust each other) it is possible to simply sayĀ ā€œthe modteam is squicked[/triggered] by ships with daisy/elias/peter and weā€™d like to read all of the works submitted so weā€™re asking not to receive submissions with those ships.ā€ hating ships is literally completely normal but making rules hard to parse is going to attract questions, especially when the implication is that ships are excluded on the grounds of morality, and a blatant power difference ship (jonelias) is equated with jondaisy, which is from what ive seen almost exclusively shown to be a relationship between equals. that makes people EXTREMELY confused about where the line is. thats why youre getting so many questions about this.Ā Ā 
in general the carrd was spotty, guilt trippy, and needlessly moralizing where it definitely did not need to be. the key to getting people to engage without getting backlash is to make the event seem fun. when your carrd is filled with stuff about unrelated negative stuff people are not going to think itā€™s a fun event at all.Ā 
and none of this even gets into the fact that at least one of the mods has a history of open hostility against pan people. i heard through the grapevine that he has since made a fauxpology about it, but frankly it already shone through in the language used in the event descriptions. its extremely hard to take any of this is good faith when it is easy to see that one of the organizers is quite fucking clear about thinking pansexuality is biphobic and the carrd is or at least used to be full of anti-pan (and other mspec identity) dogwhistles, and is notorious in some of the tma fic author circles for being extremely fucking nasty about trans men writing fic he doesnā€™t like to the point of pretending that weā€™re all cis people (in case youre not keeping track that is misgendering us by implication) because he doesnā€™t like it. i think some of you (or maybe all of you? idk) in general could stand to examine whether your engagements and participations in the fandom have been at all about having fun or adding positivity to anything, or simply making posts about what other people are doing wrong. it seems that every post i see from anyone in this group is guilt trippy and authoritative, and sadly this translated directly into the event.Ā 
when youre, say, a trans man whose first touch to one of the mods was a post about how fic where trans men have piv sex with cis men is hurting him personally and making it a moral issue and not a matter of a simple preference to the point where he feels comfortable making claims about the trans men (and transmasc nonbinary people) writing fic about trans characters re: their gender or whether theyre fetishizing trans men, your willingness to engage in good faith with an event hosted by him that features numerous red flags is not going to be unconditional.Ā 
im sorry to hear that it has been bad for your mental health, and idk whats fucking going on with this event anymore, but my good faith interpretations have diminished significantly since i saw the shit tmc specifically has been saying about pansexual people and pansexuality as an identity label. i have no clue where the rest of you stand but tmc has repeatedly, consistently shown himself to be unable to act in good faith towards anyone other than people who agree with him.Ā Ā 
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gringolet Ā· 3 years ago
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that italian?
okay okay okay i think it happened long enough ago that i can dish about the drama. she changed her url and im not including it anyway so its fine.
prepare for a fuckin. essay in responss to a TWO WORD ask but anyay
so once upon time there was an italian who hated children and loved reylo. she also hung out in the arthuriana tag and got a bunch of asks about it. so one day some poor anon comes in and asks if she has any trans headcanons for arthurian characters, and she, instead of being a normal person and saying like, no, she goes off about how trans characters in fanfic is forced representation and she cant talk about trans people bc surgery is triggering for her.
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found this in the archives lol. so i rbd politely explaining that while it was fine to not have trans hcs, her justifications for it were a little offensive.
hey i dont want to start discourse or anything but i see ur asks in the tag a lot and i wanted to politely address this. firstly obviously no one is under any obligation to hc things, and headcanons and fandom is not activism. if youā€™d just said ā€œno, not reallyā€ it would b fine. i mean, cringe of u, but fine. but u make a couple of points here i want to look at a bit critically. then there is ā€œI donā€™t like when headcanons are pushed up as ~representation, especially whenā€¦ Ehm, itā€™s just fandom stuff?ā€ i dont want to misinterpret you or put words in your mouth, but the implication that theres no need for trans rep in fandom and dismissal of that is a very cis take. My initial read of your intention there was a complaint of ā€˜why should something like fandom spaces, which are for fun and not serious, be filled with non fun serious (bad) trans stuff that i have to see when im trying to enjoy myself.ā€™ now that could be incorrect, you were a bit vague here. if that is what you meant, i think you maybe should examine why you feel that way. if it isnt, im unclear on what exactly youre trying to say here. the idea that trans hcs are performative wokeness and ā€œrepresentationā€ in fandom is completely ignoring the actual trans people making and wanting them. there is so vanishingly little representation of trans people in actual media and even less thats good, and i think implying trans hcs are being pushed on people and fandom for, ~representation (a world of meaning in the ~ i shant speculate on) is very dismissive and ignorant of that fact. honestly the main thing im troubled by is the idea that trans bodies are inherently disgusting and triggering, which is an incredibly harmful and hurtful idea, and since you yourself acknowledge that trans people and hcs dont predicate surgery i question why you bring it up, except as a justification for disconfort rooted in unexamined prejudice. im not accusing you of being a terf or anything, i dont believe you meant harm by this or have bad intentions, and im definitely not saying anyone has to hc anything. it was the uncomfronted insidiousness of your justification that concerned me. this is not a personal attack at all, you just have a lot of influence in this fandom space and i wanted to make you aware of some of the surely accidentally harmful things ur saying.
so she flips out and rbs that yelling at me and cursing me out in italian (she moved blogs so i dont have her whole response just bits)
basically she completely derailed the original topic and accused me of calling her a horrible person for her triggers? which i never did and would never do, and then tried to make it a wierd anti v proshipper thing
third: I never said thereā€™s no need of trans hcs in fandoms, BUT Iā€™ve noticed that thereā€™s a tendency of condemning people on the basis of what they ship / the dynamics they write. ( like the infinite discourse about how ā€˜I ship only mlm enemies to lovers because f/m enemies to lovers are Inherently Bad and Abusive - something I personally heard on Twitter sigh ), so I feel the need to say it. blame the current fandom climate.
and were like wow, this lady is unhinged, so we look around her blog and find a. a lot of stuff like saying its racist to not like incest?? and that italians arent white?? also shes a swerf?? and kind of deniel italian colonialsm? and reblogs from a bunch of out and out terfs} there was more but this isnt a callout post lol.
valentine lanzelet made a post about this crazy italian we found and she flipped out on him (this is one of several cursey italian tag rants)
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roughly means: GO SHIT YOURSELF (italian alternative to go fuck you), RACIST TERF IS YOUR GRANDMOTHER IN A WHEELBARROW (italian saying which does not translate well) AND WHAT HAS ITALIAN COLONIALISM TO DO WITH THIS YOU UGLY SHIT, and anyways lancelot sucks
(translated by claudio beheaded)
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anyway so then. and this is when it gets unhinged. she goes on this server me and a lot of my mutuals n friends r in, camelot, and starts complaining about me.
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(in red is the server admin, who was lovely) i asked her to move this convo to dms if she must bc it was rude to bring drama into the server, and she refused, and started insisting that she was being bullied and just wanted to be left alone, so i was like okay lets all block each other and move on, and she refused, continuing to defend everything she was being criticized for
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they also said claudio was making them look bad by translating their rants which like... queen if that made them look bad they were already a bad look.
so she keeps pinging people and replying to shit despite everyone else at this point begging her to just drop it and call it a stalemate
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imagine this but around n around for like an hour. also she repeatedly got me and valentine confused it was super funny. also she claimed it was an invasion of her privacy for valentine to go on her public blog and look at the things she openly said and rbd there
so the server got put in slow mode and she KEPT GOING even though everyone was just begging her to stop and not even responding
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as u can see, around this point we just started spamming her with emoji reactions. she announced she was leaving then went back to arguing a full three times before finally dipping from the server
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then she continued complaining about us and calling us puriteens in her tags (trying to make it a proshipper v anti thing i guess lol?)
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for literally months before finally remaking. also in that time she got in an argument about how the crusades were fine actually. italianphobia works hard but she works harder i guess
anyway i prolly left out a lot but thats the italian saga
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Oh!!!! You're into rick and morty too?! Do you ship rickmorty? If you do, do you have any headcanons? Favourite version? Fun fact, I used to actually not ship C-137cest but I followed a bunch of blogs and the tag out of spite bc ew antis. And now im back in the fandom and i actually do ship it, so all things come full circle i guess!
(Oh sorry that this isnt a proper ask ajdbsjsj im just super excited to see another proship RaM fan!)
Heyy there!! I love asks like this! ā¤ā¤
So i dont ship rickmorty, but i do respect it as a ship! Definitely a huge fan of winding up shipping things out of spite tho! Tbh i dont think I really have any rick and morty ships šŸ˜… but i would love to share an unrelated rick and morty headcanon i have!!
Summer is a trans man. I don't know the exact reasons of why I feel this so firmly, but it just feels right. She (only using she/her because thats her official pronouns) gives off massive trans vibes to me, and it isn't even how she acts, its just in the way she exists, somehow. I just have this feeling theres going to be a pull-out-the-rug-from-under-you moment where she comes out as a trans man, and nobody sees it coming. Which is honestly just perfect! Because being trans isn't always something "obvious" when you're still closeted. Anyways yeah thats about all i have to share on the subject!
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sp-ud Ā· 3 years ago
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I posted 54,074 times in 2021
12139 posts created (22%)
41935 posts reblogged (78%)
For every post I created, I reblogged 3.5 posts.
I added 17,941 tags in 2021
#spud liveblogs - 4533 posts
#asks - 4285 posts
#spud rambles - 3975 posts
#q - 1974 posts
#queue tag ig - 1010 posts
#spud originals - 572 posts
#critical - 466 posts
#dream smp - 449 posts
#spud school rambles - 371 posts
#ranboo - 306 posts
Longest Tag: 139 characters
#this fandoms ableism šŸ¤ this fandoms weirdass obsession with making everything a family dynamic: c!slime i am so sorry u deserve so much be
My Top Posts in 2021
#5
Yo whatā€™s penis smp?? Iā€™m confused
the best tldr i can give is:
mcyt-neg person makes a post mocking how mcyt posts sound, making a joke about penisunavaliable and shittyfartbaby69 and an electric chair execution scene.
mcytblr (or more accurately, dsmpblr but the op just said mcytblr) finds the post and start going along with it. ironically. making posts self/twt mocking how we sound talking about the dsmp.
slowly more and more people start talking about this. and next thing you know there's way more that c!penis and c!shitty. and there's actual designs. and there's some semblance of a plot. its still very self/twt mocking, talking about c!-apolgists, c!-antis, shipping, talk of theortical ccs and their boundaries.
and then it starts slipping into a less ironic thing. all within a few hours. basically think of it as a nonsensical improv rp dsmpblr is doing where we rp as extreme fans of a rp smp that isnt real either.
2415 notes ā€¢ Posted 2021-05-20 07:24:15 GMT
#4
all "kristen is death on the dsmp" aus/theories become so much funnier where you imagine her in her mc skin instead of any of the really cool designs fanartists give her.
like. oh my god, its her, the god of death.
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3415 notes ā€¢ Posted 2021-05-14 19:19:06 GMT
#3
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shiny hunting but in minecraft (i think you can alsoĀ ā€˜shiny huntā€™ the brown panda, maybe)
3854 notes ā€¢ Posted 2021-01-01 20:15:38 GMT
#2
/rp /dsmp
i just fucking realized. at least part of the reason tubbo doesnt hold the execution against techno is likely because techno was the only one who was actively trying to do something to avoid execution.
despite the fact techno was the one pulled the trigger, we also saw him do more to try and stop the execution than literally anyone else.
quackity made some comments about it being a bad idea to schlatt but nothing more.
wilbur actively wasnt helping other than false assurances and telling tommy not to intervene.
tommy wanted to step in but was stopped by wilbur.
but techno? techno spent a solid minute or two trying to stall. to get tubbo out of there. techno was clearly just as confused as tubbo when schlatt called him up to the stand. techno literally apologized to tubbo and did his best to make it quick, especially with a weapon he wasnt sure the effectiveness of.
4257 notes ā€¢ Posted 2021-08-03 22:34:00 GMT
#1
the new snapshot (21w07a) changed how ores look.
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im kinda glad theyā€™re no longer the same thing recolored but like... damn... thats gonna take a bit to get used to.
36787 notes ā€¢ Posted 2021-02-17 17:47:18 GMT
Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review ā†’
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ridleycraft Ā· 4 years ago
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shit the atla fandom says
"this genocide survivor gets in the way of my ship!!!! he deserves to suffer, that nasty abuser!!!!"
"i love fire lady katara!!!! it isnt racist or misogynistic at all!!!!"
"wait, what? this 14 y/o abuse victim is being mean to my two faves??? ABUSER!!!!!!!!"
"iroh is so sweet and wise!!!! hes the kindest character in the series who has totally never committed any war crimes and absolutely has never been creepy to like a 20-something year old woman EVER!!!! also he totally didnt demonize that 14 y/o abuse victim from earlier SHES JUST AN ABUSER!!!!"
"hama and jet both deserve DEATH for what they did!!!! i dont care if it was because of severe trauma!!!! DEATH!!!!"
"zuko hasnt done anything wrong!!!! hes just a little baby turtleduck uwu"
"ursa didnt neglect azula at all!!!! SHES INNOCENT GUYS AND AZULA DESERVED IT FOR BEING AN ABUSER!!!!"
"(insert character here) is homophobic for saying (insert something that has nothing to do with being gay here) guys!!!! WTF!!!!"
"*posts hate in the main character tags rather than the anti tags* WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME???????????? šŸ˜¢šŸ˜¢šŸ˜¢šŸ˜¢šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­"
"(insert character here) IS GAY/TRANSMASC GUYS!!!!!! SO CUTE!!!!!!!!! ...wait, you headcanon (insert character here) as lesbian/transfem? DISGUSTING!!!!!!!!!! THE DEATH PENALTY FOR YOU!!!!!!!!"
"*this isnt any specific thing people just really like vagueposting about minors here*"
"hot take: (insert cold take here)"
"WOW I LOVE (insert nasty ship here (no this isnt referring to any ship i just dont enjoy this is referring to genuinely problematic ships)) SO MUCH!!!!!!! THEIR CHEMISTRY..........šŸ˜šŸ˜šŸ˜šŸ˜"
"sorry, im just a little bit of an...*whips out abuser apologism sunglasses* OZAI SIMP"
me: man, i sure do hope everything gets better in the legend of korra fandom!
everything: *gets worse*
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