#this isnt a big comic idea. But it's more of a comic to influence the masses

[lilybug-02]

Dewi has made a new bug friend! What will he do next?! Who knows!

Bug Fact: Surprisingly, scorpions can actually break glass if they put enough force behind their strikes.

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Masterpost

[ender--slime]

long post about the 10/8 update incoming!!!!!!!

ok i dont usually post my thoughts on updates bwcause im the number one adhd rambler of all time but here we go.. you get to read them today!!!!!!! SO. one of my big HSBC theories is that Ult Rose is actually the mastermind of sorts behind the whole story. not in an evil way, because dirk isnt even evil, just in the way that she knows a lot more than shes letting on!!! and that dirk and al might not be the only ones with real influence here. this theory was first thought up by my friend @classpectpokerap and its called the "Gloves are Canon" theory and you can read about it more in-depth here and here! as a fun challenge go back and read the epilogues and early hs2 (and also new updates) with the idea that rose knows more than we think. youll get some really fun stuff out of it and hopefully youll be convinced :p

SO ANYWAYS. how does this concern the 10/8 anniversary update?

HOO BOY

first of all, lets get a few content warnings and things outta the way. this lil analysis is gonna talk about some suicidal characters and suicidal ideation so plz !! be warned!!

first off, we know that Ult Dirk is really just afraid. hes not scary or intimidating at all, to the reader, because he killed himself in one timeline and hes really just trying to do it again. he even says this in the epilogues- that he hopes his death is Just when it comes, and he hopes its dave that does it. dirk feels as though he doesnt belong- hes always felt this way. he thinks the world and his friends would be better off without him, and his last gift to them is to create a new universe where they can start fresh outside of lord english's influence for good. he might be the most obnoxious narrator on earth c, claiming that he knows whats best and that hes doing right by everyone and by you, as the reader. but the TAGLINE of the epilogues are "tales of dubious authenticity". it tells you from the start that youre dealing with the worlds most unreliable narrator here. a guy who says one thing, says hes fine, puts on a mask to make himself seem stronger, but is always harboring the most pain. who also thinks this way?

rose fuckin lalonde!!!!! this isnt just beyond canon either. try and count how many times she did some suicide mission shit in og homestuck. and how non chalant she was about every single one. this character trait stuck around, and its especially clear in the 10/8 update.

and who does she reference, saying that he made the right choice to kill himself?

bam. this miserable motherfucker wants Out.

notice how she doesnt say "kill himself". she says LEAVE. as if she knows ult dirk is in the other timeline, alive and well. as if she knows that she could have done that too. made the right choice. the canon choice.

but what does that mean, in terms of Gloves are Canon? well, if you read the gloves are canon theory part 2, it states how at the beginning of candy, rose's ult self visions completely went away supposedly, but by the time HSBC picked up last year, theyre back...and worse?

how? its only been a few days, in universe.

was she lying about them being gone? is it the influence of having the Light, the Narrative, the Eyes of the Reader back on her now that the comic is going again? was she ulted the whole time just like dirk and we dont know it?

to the reader, the rosemary breakup in both timelines was a destruction of rose's character. but to rose.....its what she thinks kanaya deserves. rose thinks kanaya deserves a life without her. rose thinks shes BETTER OFF without her. and maybe deep down she thinks the whole timeline, and the whole universe, is better off without her too.

just like ult dirk.

i have a lot of thoughts on the other two parts of the update, but i wanted to focus on the concept of ult rose with this post because. god. idk her whole section was so potent and not only confirmed my theory, but just made me feel sick!! /pos

[fogggywinds]

the lbp franchise carries so much potential for spinoff comics you dont even know. i would love to find out more about the Popit Academy, or how Scarlet and Vex have had beef before, or how Carnivalia is holding up now after The Hollows vanished, or how Newton is resolving the mess he made to his planet while under the influence of The Titans...

and the idea of lbp comics isnt far fetched either. Sackboy: A Big Adventure's pre-orders came with a digital comic about one of Scarlet's adventures and childhood.

As long as the comics are done correctly and dont start milking the games, i think it would actually be pretty neat. especially considering how gorgeous lbp's artstyle is. (the sticker designs, the concept art...)

[twipsai]

heyoo! just wanted to say love your rewrite comic of sonic forces!! tis very cool :)

if you don't mind me asking, is anything else going on in this rewrite which you could let us know about? or tis a secret?

ok first of all this ask, the two reblogs you added tags to, and the comment you left literally made me wanna write so much more for this rewrite you have no idea. genuinely such a large motivation burst TYSMMMM

SECOND OF ALL! this rewrite is kind of vague rn, i have an idea for a four or five chapter fic that takes place in the month gap between forces and idw, but (glances at my 2/3rds finished wip thats 32k words rotting in my gdocs) well. im trying to finish something else for the time being, so i have no idea when thats gonna happen

in terms of actually rewriting forces itself, i have quite a few ideas for it but not a lot of concrete things written down -- my main problem with the game, especially after fully playing it (5 hours of my life fucking WASTED), is that it is simultaneously such a serious story, but doesnt take itself seriously in the slightest -- you have, on one hand, Sonic being tortured for six months in a tiny prison cell, but on the other, you have Sonic walking out of there completely fine and it's never acknowledged again. you have, on one hand, two teenagers leading a resistance in a war, but on the other, you have those two teenagers acting bland and uninteresting the entire time. theres so much that could have been done with this story, but instead of grabbing hold of that spark, the writers, instead, decided to write something bland, boring, and worst of all, disingenuous. this is worse than writing something thats bad, in my opinion.

my rewrite takes a lot of notes from my buddy Chip's rewrite called Reinforced (which theyve only really posted about on artfight here), so much so that sometimes i talk about them interchangeably lol, one of the biggest changes in the story is that Tails and Rouge work together. also Infinite is a much bigger threat, specifically to Sonic, and his death is much more intense

this might sound like a deranged thing to say but ive been tossing around in my head what i want Sonic to go through during his time in the death egg, whether i want it to be a white room torture sort of deal, or if i wanna torment him with visions (illusions), so ive sorta been trying to figure out in exactly what way hes fucked up LMAO

additionally, like most other people, im cutting the avatar and Classic Sonic from the script -- theres something to be said about Sonic going through something that fundamentally changes both him and the world, and fighting that threat along side his younger self, but the source material isnt interested in exploring that, so im not either (i actually am, but not in this rewrite,,,, not in this rewrite.) and im cutting the avatar from this in favor of bringing Tails back into the story beyond him being scared and smart for like 10 minutes of the total runtime and then saying "true dat" at the end. i mean cmon!! he watched his big brother presumably die right in front of him! the unbreakable bond, well, broke! thats fucking important! Frontiers and IDW explored this, and i want to as well. its very interesting to me. and he should have been playable. i will die on this hill

also, Sonic doesnt get rescued at the start of the story, it happens wayyy later into the story (right before the climax probably). i hated how they found him practically two seconds after they lost him

a lot of this may be influenced by Sonic Forces Overclocked, which i have plans to play (once i have. free time), since ive heard a lot of good things about it and am very interested in the story it has to tell.

"wheres shadow" idk :( probably brooding in a cave i havent thought that far ahead

[waterloggedsoliloquy]

18 & 20 for the ask game. i need to hear how this hypothetical drama would unfold

you picked the GOODIES

18.) what aspect of the story would get you #canceled on twitter?

this is a toughie is the thing. while im not one of those creators thats terrified of being offensive or problematic, i also dont pay that much attention to elements of work that might offend. im more interested in being genuine and trusting my message rather than relishing in having #problematique content.

that being said i think a lot of people would not like that sicely isnt a g*ld st*r lesbian or that lucerne doesnt use labels, bc twitter is really hung up on what characters "really" are or what stories "really" mean.

i think theyd also do that thing where theyd be like ugh look at these children currently in abusive situations why are they not acting 100% perfectly, the author clearly has no idea what theyre doing with portraying abuse, this is just torture porn and fetishizing ptsd/osddid. bc theres no way that the things that happen in CW could ever happen to people, bc abuse happens to other people and never in anything i might have to interact with.

20.) your ocverse just got a movie trilogy a la hunger games style. how have they horribly mangled your message/theme so that the movies are now a showcase of what the original was condemning?

This ones also a toughie actually bc a large part in why the hunger games movies contributed to showcasing what the original work condemned is because the media circus and bloodsports as vapid entertainment were directly being condemned in the original and #Media isnt really a huge part of carousel waltz. i think in order to really turn carousel waltz on its head youd have to be simultaneously very victim-blamey to the children but also prop up the adults as the ones who must "save them", bc children cant do anything on their own and cant be trusted to have legitimate grievances with the adults in their lives. flattening midas into either a villain who never cared about the people he abused or apologizing for him as a well-meaning patriarch who was just led astray and by proxy flattening the abuse into depictions more palatable to the wider consumer audience would do it i think.

but i dont know if it being a movie trilogy would necessarily cause those changes to occur-- movies are visual and sequential like comics but usually have to be 2 hours or less and are overwhelmingly held hostage at the whims of distributors, executive boards, investors, etc. so the influences it would have over carousel waltz would be along those lines. i think that with the time crunch it'd probably be really easy to make the story less subtle, and to have to hammer home points. certain characters necessarily would not have as much screentime and focus in a movie trilogy, which i think WOULD contribute to being an example of what im trying to condemn, and a movie might inadvertently say that some abused children are just collateral damage and we can move past them, some abused children dont have interiority or anything to draw attention to them, some abused children are more important or worth rescuing more. its also very important to me that most of the carousel waltz kids r not white, and that the grownups are, but casting would probably whitewash them or try to make the story colorblind instead of keeping in how midas' abuse takes advantage of his identity of whiteness over them. combine this w the idea that there needs to be adults to save these kids and u get a white savior araceli. if this concept makes you want to gnaw your leg off at the ankle to get the shackle off, that just means youre still human! try to hold onto that feeling.

since magical girl isnt a big genre in the west theyd try to reflavor it as some other thing like superheroes or a dnd party or something. or theyd want to age up the kids so the bad things happen to a more acceptable age group bc the idea that kids might have bad things happen to them is a scary thought so theyd completely miss the point abt it being a story abt child abuse and now its a buncha late teens-early 20s bullshit.

im actually debating how much swearing i want in carousel waltz (it was really hard writing guardians dilemma without zizi swearing) but executives would only let me have one fuck and would not let anthea call anyone a cocksucker :(

[angstics]

might have more thoughts to add to your drag essay later but for now Big Yes ++ i also have been thinking about the way that Archetypes have been a throughline in basically all of gerard's art, from mcr's concept albums through (what i have seen of) his comic stuff and earlier illustrations and now very vividly in these tour costumes. which to me feels drag-adjcacent, so much of drag culture is about appropriating and camping up (pointing at, exaggerating, making absurd, celebrating) pop culture figures & cultural icons/archetypes. gerard's 2022 costumes are doing the appropriating but not so much the camping, with the exception of the casino king moment -- but camp has been such an important factor in almost all of mcr's history before this (whole books could be written about this). i'd say the black parade look at its peak with all of its liza/fosse influence was Bandleader Drag moreso than the cheerleader look was Cheerleader Drag despite the apparent crossdressing-ness of the latter. yknow?

this is from 21 days ago!!!!! im here now. this is exactly my point. the art form of drag is marked by exaggeration of gender presentation, which is often represented by pop culture figures because they are the arbiters of iconized (ie dramatized ie context-divorced ie CAMPY) femininity or masculinity. people do drag of celebrity performers like elvis or liza, archetypes like construction workers or show girls. one part of drag i didnt talk about is its appropriation of beauty standards -- breast enhancers, faux abs, accentuated glam make-up. there is no focus on beauty in gerard's 2022-23 costumes (are they costumes?) as ive said, theyre casual clothes. it cant be drag. the presentation isnt about accentuation, it's about something else.

it's fun that this point has been further proven by how nonchalant the office worker was. the drama wasnt in the outfit, it was in the gore. there's nothing gendered there. though someone who is typically seen as a man donning female conservative wear and therefore twisting that descriptor is interesting in of itself (as spittingout said)!!!! office drag makes fun of hyperfeminine conservativism. as casual clothes, the effect is different. the subtlety positions these outfits as normal -- which they are.

a while ago i wrote about how critics used the word "camp" incorrectly to detract from my chem being unironically good. i dont like the piece today. i honestly didnt realize that a lot of mcr music is enjoyed for its drama more than its content. my penchant for sincerely consuming everything blinded me. but i do like my classic approach to what makes camp camp -- how it's an intellectual's hidden gem, not something intended. i applied that to how ppl didnt understand the nonconforming looks of my chem past, making the looks camp objects (meaning objects that are highly dramatic because of their lost meaning).

these campy looks include the bandleader persona. the look is gendered by gerard's stage attitude -- the brooding, the aggression, the boxy stature. though the hair and clothing are non descript, they're read as masculine -- the idea that the lack of gender indicates masculinity is a big gender theory topic. even when the original hairstyle is a feminine pixie and the black parade jacket has a corset back, the fact they are, respectively, short and suit-like lands further from feminine readings. SOOOOOOOOOOO all this to say the bandleader is an exaggeration of agender-practically-masculine archetypes like fosse's emcee (a clown doing showman drag, doing showgirl drag, doing fash drag -- more likely to be read as masculine over feminine despite the make-up because clowns are agender, which we know as functionally masculine). wipes brow

another point u didnt talk about but just thought of. INTERESTING that the use of the word "drag" in three cheers ("they make me do push-ups in drag") is obviously synonymous with cross-dressing cuz it's supposed to be embarrassing, while the use of "drag" in black parade ("here's my resignation ill serve it in drag") is closer to the art form or at least empowered cross-dressing. also a fun pun! serve 👨‍💼 and serve 💅

[reanimationstation]

Hello! I'm curious about your BATDR au, with "Dad Sammy". I hope it's okay if I ask some questions:

How does this au's ending differ from the canon ending (if it differs at all besides Sammy's not dead and Bendy and Audrey are still in the ink world)? Did we have the big Monster Bendy showdown like in the game or did something else happen? Can Audrey and Bendy travel between worlds?

Also, with reference to the comic of Henry and Sammy talking about Bendy, is Bendy trapped in his toon form again or is he choosing to be stay that way? Can he still turn into the Ink Demon?

Love your art and the story ideas btw

oh it is absolutely alright to ask me questions, i love talking about my aus! thank you so much :] and sorry that this is being answered multiple hours late, i was busy with college

essentially, everything in BATDR happens the same, it's post-game where things start to diverge. sammy did die, the showdown happened, bendy and audrey did merge before and the loop got reset, though i think the city and the trains and all the new places we saw in BATDR still exist because they may have been sort of "hardcoded" into the loop by wilson. now that audreys in charge of the ink realm, i think she'd help as many people back out of the puddles, and take some creative liberties here and there (focusing in on sam, he came back a little more sheepy because everyone unanimously decided to suggest it to audrey without telling her that he'd HATE it. poor girl. he got over it, mostly), especially to make life more bearable.

audrey and bendy can travel between worlds, and i actually think that at least for this au, most everyone can. most dont, however, as they'd still be ink monsters/toons outside. that might be subject to change, though, i haven't super decided.

bendy isnt trapped in this form, he's actually gotten a bit more control over which form he takes now. he does, however, often choose the toon form because people like him more when he looks like that. this is an important part of the au to me, how people treat others differently/expect them to act differently based on appearances. ben sometimes could, if he wanted to, turn back into the Ink Demon, but since theres near universal hate for that form, he doesnt often.

i think one of the factors that does influence his transformation is fear. if he feels scared, or weak, or trapped, he wouldnt be able to transform back into the ink demon until those feelings have passed. he has to feel fairly comfortable and sure of himself in order to. does any of this make any sense?? i am just rambling

[alatismeni-theitsa]

anti LO anon opinions:

1) I pointed out the same opinion about thanatos on why he should care and a fan responded that he shouldnt have a say on hades and persephones relationship because he was making out with minthe while they were still dating...

2) I’m just so annoyed LO Persephone’s visual maturity is all in terms of hades. It’s via how he wants her to dress, how he wants her to act, via what he wants her to enjoy and do. He’s never once gone out of his comfort zone for her or branched out to see what she wants and enjoys or even really ask, meanwhile she does everything he wants at the drop of a hat. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth. This isn’t a couple of balance and compromise, its not even one of real respect, it’s just the woman making herself whatever she wants her future husband to be while he does nothing but throw money at her as “affection”. It’s essentially her having to do whatever Demeter wants, which was framed as bad, but this time it’s whatever Hades wants, so now it’s good? She still isn’t really given the choice, now is she?

3) i really have to question why LO keeps framing "dark" persephone as the queen and wife of hades because that side is framed as basically a different character who has popped out before and very purposely has said it doesnt like hades and sees him as weak and not worth their time. it also has it that persephone doesnt like or even control this side of her so its like??? is the endgame the real persephone being trapped inside herself by this evil persona and hades is married to someone who doesnt love him/outright hates him? this wouldnt be an issue if they just let Persephone be a complex character who had light and darkness in her instead of insisting at every turn she stay a “precious cinnamon roll” at all times that you need to create an out there alt-personality to explain everything away 🤔

4) LO has the regressive idea that women are all innocent victims unless stated otherwise (such as having a sex life outside Hades (Minthe, Aphrodite) or not falling at his feet (Hestia, Demeter)). The thing is, women, no matter how "precious" they are, are capable of being bad people. It'd make sense Persephone the "dread queen" would actually be cruel and not nice and even the scarier of the two of them, but the comic wont commit to it, so everyone else has to be wrong instead

5) I would be more willing to hate LO Thanatos if it weren’t for the fact Persephone is a mega rich heiress who has everyone coming to her defense for merely existing including his mega rich CEO boss meanwhile the comic seems to imply Nyx (and by extension her family like Thanatos) lost their status and power once the Big Three like Hades came to power, reducing them to subordinates and powerless to his wants and desires. It’d like an Amazon warehouse worker calling out how unfair their working conditions are only to be told “yeah well Bezos got divorced last year and he’s really sad about it, feel bad for him instead and forget your problems.”    Why should I feel bad for a bunch of rich jerks who won’t face an real consequences and demean the ones who can’t stand up to them?

6) Regarding the recent LO chapter with Thanatos and Daphne talking about Persephone and Hades's relationship. I can kinda understand from both the perspectives: 1) Thanatos is a long-term employee for Hades so he has a better viewpoint of seeing the special treatment between Hades and Persephone up close. His feelings are partially influenced by his negative peers (Thetis and Minthe) who outright dislikes Persephone. But in his perspective: He is a longtime employee at a company who worked their way to a high position, and then one day your employer starts to hire someone younger and gives said younger colleague special treatment and attention (along with a big paycheck that most interns shouldn't be paid for). Part of the reason can also be that the said younger colleague is both their family background (being the child of one of the Six Traitors) and being very youthful and attractive2) Daphne only sees the relationship from an outsiders perspective and is partially defensive for her longtime friend. She is aware of Hades and Persephone's unusual relationship but also means well at knowing not to pry into others personal lives. 

7) I think that in lo to protect "our precious cinammon roll" Daphne could said that maybe that is Hades fault not hers bc he give her special treatment and his bad boss. This would at least show that there is unfairness at his job, that he is rightfuly angry just maybe at wrong person. It would be at least better than "dont care about this lol"

8) Persephone in lo only work 1 actual day of work. Her first day is only a tour, on her second day she work, on third day she isnt working bc she learn how to use computer and now she sometimes try to do something with work while flirting with hades, so maybe she worked 1,5 day of work in total. It isnt surprise thst she didnt work a lot since its been 13 days in comic

[owldart]

it's so cool seeing all the research and thought that goes into the toonkind characters- I'm curious about your take on Magica, with Spella being a toon that appeared as adult, is that something with a reason? in the comics I love her little flashbacks to childhood, so seeing her without that part of her backstory is very interesting (and sad!)- what was it that drew you to playing her? do you like the comics version of her, or the cartoons? both? she's such a rich personality I'd like to know!

hi! good to know other people wanna hear about spella, i love talking about her! she’s my favorite grumpy magic gothbird.

Spella is half-toon bc honestly, i didn’t (and don’t) have a paid dndbeyond account. i would’ve used yuni’s toonkind setting to adjust her stats, but in order to do that you gotta pay or write it down. dndbeyond being digital is the only thing that kept me from losing my character sheets, so i just decided to use the values for the aarakocra species instead of the toonkind one. easy, free, and also lets my duck actually fly! at the time i thought it was a great idea, and we didn’t have a lot of half-reelkind toons. i wanted to broaden the types of toons played. two birds... one stone?

the ‘she appeared as an adult’ bit was also a result of me wanting to broaden the types of toons we saw in einquell. at the time, almost every toon was the type that was born, grew up, and became an adult. but yuni had it on her sheet that some toons just- sprang up adults! i thought it was a really interesting idea, so i kept it on the backburner.

then during ky’s heist game, they introduced ellie, vince and charlie’s daughter, and i thought it would be goddamn hilarious if spella, upon seeing a child, didn’t know what it was. Just assumed it was an odd little gremlin they kept for company.

which of course doesn’t make sense if you yourself had been a child at some point- you’d know that small gremlin is just a step on the development table for people and many toons. so when charlie was ready to kick some butt, the first thing that came to mind was ‘HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT’S A CHILD?? I NEVER WAS ONE’

and honestly, that’s a funny line just by itself. most character development i give to my kids is just ‘rule of funny’, ‘rule of cool’, or ‘rule of empty space not taken’. experimenting is fun.

spella isnt magica, and magica isn’t spella. magica was a jumping off point, but spella’s developing her own senses and personality. the thing that drew me to riff off of magica was magica’s unapologetic bastardness. like, it’s rare to find a character that is just... a jerk! often! unrepentantly! unless theyre a villain. and magica despell IS a villain, but the type you see in line at the bank and sigh and try not to engage in small talk with. it’s a very good dynamic.

also, i would be lying if i said i wasn’t influenced at all by @modmad‘s duck comics featuring her. actually, i drew a couple of duck comics myself a few years ago based on theirs, just because i couldn’t help but think of more things to draw! i’ve seen both the cartoons, 1984 and 2017, and i’ve read a few of the comics, so that gave me the base traits of ‘snarky’, ‘goth’, ‘ambitious’, ‘studious’, and ‘honestly, a jerk sometimes’, and then i mixed them all in a big cauldron and spilled in chemical x! out came isaspella. she’s terrible and i love her.

[lucarioisinthevoid]

I have just found your blog and uh. the gags and things confuse me a bit, if it isnt too much to ask where did the whole "puppet angel", "Mike being angry", "meme god thing" come from?

Why hello there new person! Who probably left because I’ve been gone for like half a year, I apologize for my insanely long absence. Things happened. Anyhow, I understand all of this blog being confusing- it was actually supposed to be nothing but a companion piece to my fanfiction “A Guard’s Life”, so the entire place works under the presumption that you read it… though of course, nothing wrong with not having done so, it’s a stupidly long book by now. Asking for clarification is always good :3 I’m going to try and give you a run down for now though! >I’m not sure what you mean with puppet angel! If you’re talking about the puppet calling himself an angel, then it’s actually the puppet’s way of trying to deny his previous humanity. Charlie was killed and stuffed and made to feel worthless and powerless- and seeing that same lack of power in the other stuffed kids, he had the intense desire to distance himself from that. He wanted to become a bit of a savior for the other kids, in a way coping with his resentment for the parts of himself that he projected onto himself. If anyone asks him, he never was a trapped soul, he always was an angel, incarnated to punish the evil going on- However, nobody really believes him. >Mike being angry Well, the short version is that this incarnation of Mike Schmidt goes back on a VERY old fan interpretation, that came to be around the first two games! Him being angry was the running gag there! I never QUITE followed that old comic, so my version is rather different in most ways. In my universe, a big part of his anger stems from the fact that he’s very easy prey for vengeful spirits and shadows roaming. So not full on other souls, but most negative parts a soul can leave behind, like resentment, anger, hate, a desire for revenge, unfounded hatred, etc. This comes because a child, due to a Freddy’s related incident (not the bites), his head got severely damaged and they replaced part of his skull with a metal plate. Fun fact, that is actually in part inspired by Stephen King’s “Tommyknockers”. It’s quite an odd book, and I don’t know if I’d recommend it, but one of the characters had a slightly easier time to resist the influence, due to a metal plate in their head, which I thought was neat- Mike of course suffers from the opposite, as metal in my world is what allows the soul to latch. Absorbing those little pieces of soul and hatred, he himself has become a constant rage machine! Freddy’s kinda helps him though to get it under control, as the presence of actual souls deters the shadows. … which is a little bit of a “from the frying pan into the fire” situation. >The Meme God It’s actually something the utterly wonderful and talented editor TheFoolishNoob created! Here is the image:

Fuck your eyes Fuck my eyes Thanks, T Thanks for providing us with actual agony and teaching us how memes die And all just because I was like “haha, marionette but with emoji face” Yeah, so, never give your editor friends ANY ideas! The Memerionette claims dead memes, as one should I hope that answers everything! Hope you enjoy your stay! Hah, honestly, I almost want to write tiny drabbles based around some of this to elaborate more on things I never got around in the story… but I’m not sure where to even start. Thanks for reminding me of all this stuff!

[mamusings]

Supernatural Season 2 thoughts

Continuing with my rewatch. This season kicks up several gears on season 1. Overall the storytelling is much better. There is a less formulaic approach to the even the MOTW episodes. Its inventive: you get one from the perspective of the ghost (Roadkill), two that layer in the boys run ins with the law. The first 4th wall breaker (Hollywood babylon), first alt reality (What is and what should never be) and I think the first straight up comic one (Tall Tales). This works much better. S1 episodes give you: a kill, work out the lore, find the creature and kill it right back. Instead of s1 espousing the lore and developing the brothers as a team, we now get to explore the show's moral compas and the complexity of what brotherhood means within it. I think Hollywood Babylon riffs off ditching the initial importance placed on accuracy in how Spn presented itself in it's own storyline. Yep we like story telling thank you, realism isnt really the point. The monsters and sub plots more clearly refract on the season themes and plot.

Supporting characters are another aspect of the shows blooming. They are a much more varied and interesting bunch. Gordon helps explore a key issue for the show - the distinction between being a hunter and a killer. Its significant he appears twice - it's a big issue. The psychics Andy and Ava are fun. Bank heist dude Ronald garners the right mix of derision and respect - I'm not sure spn homages to freaks and geeks hit the right note most of the time. And theres the Roadhouse crew and Bobby who really help flesh out what can become an overly confined universe.

The first third explores grief. You get the contrast in Sam and Dean's personalities in how they try to deal with John's death. But you also get the sense of them learning from each other as the season progresses. Dean tries talking. Sam tries keeping busy. Both grow while staying themselves. Nice. You also get a switch from s1 dominance of Dean's concern for Sam, with Sam's concern about Dean's increasingly high octane behaviour here and it's a nice switch. With grief you get guilt. Sam's is the easier too little too late regrets. Dean's is the motherload of guilt that John sacrificed himself for him. Given the shows dominant theology is Christian I find it hugely interesting that the focus here is on the receiver of the sacrifice. The overwhelming guilt Dean feels underpins the opening episodes, gets hammered home in Crossroads and then comes back for an even bigger bite when Dean does the same to Sam in the finale. Bobby's anger with Dean and Sam's devastation leaves me little doubt that as much as we all love that Sam is back, Dean did wrong here. Although maybe Dean's guilt comes from his low self worth. Sam might cope very differently?? But I do think the zombie episode declarations of 'what is dead should stay dead' make the point that thus wheeling and dealing with death cant be good. I personally find the idea that moral rules dont apply to Sam and Dean because of love is a weak one. I think fandom does spn a disservice by reducing something really complicated here into 'well they are soul mates'. Loving someone is not an excuse to chuck the rules out the window. But maybe the show itself descends into a moral free for all with no underpinning message and the blame lies there? I'm not sure. In a way that is what I'm trying to figure out with these commentaries.

What works better in explaining why Dean does to Sam what John did to him is the other big theme of season 2: the idea that right and wrong isnt black and white. This is the focus of lots of episodes some of which explore whether hunters are just killers. And others that explore at what stage something becomes evil and why. Both these questions are crucial in relation to Sam's destiny and how each of them should respond to that destiny. The first half of the season sees Dean trying out his fathers black/white approach and the hardening off of himself he thinks he needs to achieve in order to kill Sam should that becomes necessary. Its the mid season finale that finally answers that one for Dean. Sam goes proper bad, Dean doesn't kill him. Along the way, with Sam's prompting, Dean questions not only his father but also the morality he had assumed of his hunting so far. How Dean outgrows John is a huge theme for me. I find it fascinating because he remains the same kind of man as John. Tough, difficult etc he diesnt become Sam. What he changes ir accepts are that what he prizes isnt what John prizes, but rather the people he loves and he learns that this isnt a failing or a weakness. But it's a long long road.

Sam wrestles with the fact that he may turn evil trying to find ways to hope and ways to cope. He takes a leaf out of the Dean playbook at gets drunk. He prays. He looks for a safety net getting Dean's to promise to off him. Dean promises to save him, but the message in Heart is that sometimes the only way to save someone is to kill them. However, the other message is solving things one step at a time, making the right play for the circumstances and not drawing one arbitrary line somewhere - be it between people and non-people or even that evil acts make you irredeemably evil. Slippery stuff, but that's what makes it interesting.

One thing I really like in this season is how the brothers begin to influence each other. They are still a study in contrasts, but they try out each others approaches and they've learned to value what the other brings to the table. As Sam says in the opener they have just started to be brothers again. Their relationship is so supportive that the comic Tall Tales reminding us how much they wind each other up is a needed counterpart lest things get just too damn sweet. The disturbing siblings at the centre of 2 episodes is also sends the message that it ain't all roses too. Andy has an actual evil twin. The ending of Playthings with the sisters is filled with creepy foreboding is particular to this episode. One sister gives her life up for the other and it feels wrong. Of course its foreshadowing other famous brothers but let's leave that alone just now.

In terms of Sam and Dean, their brotherhood seems to have kicked the S1 Sam and Dean team up into formidable. Their run-ins with law enforcement moves our perception of them beyond boys hunting into being increasingly impressed as they outwit cops and feds. It also moves their interactions with outsiders beyond gratitude from victims towards validation from peers and this feels important. There's the seamless teamwork with code words and all. But more importantly trust and loyalty - Sam is unswayed under police questioning in The Usual Suspects. Folsom Prison Blues most explicitly highlights Dean's almost fanatical sense of loyalty and paying your dues.

This pays off in the final two parter. As strong as All Hell Breaks Lose 2 is, part 1 is a yawn fest. But what is interesting is that while Sam does his best to found a team, Azazel can just pluck them off one by one by appeals to each person's individual self interest. The only one of the psychics who gets that the only way to win is to stick together is Sam. In my view Sam learned this from Dean. Dean is always playing the stronger together card. At this point in the show, brotherhood is about solidarity, trust and loyalty. That's actually the message here far more than love. Of course they love each other. But that alone wouldn't have got them this far. What gets them here is sticking together. When Dean finally surpasses John in killing Azazel he gets his moment of John unqualified approval and love. But right after comes the key dialogue of the season. Sam says 'you did it' and Dean replies 'I didnt do it alone'. That seems to me to highlight what's been going on so far. Learning not to do it alone. Learning to lean on and accept others. That's where the Winchester boys outgrow their upbringing and themselves.

Addendum: the angel episode House of the Holy deserves a mention. Its so finely balanced between being about angels and not when viewed on it's own. Its only on rewatching that the effects and props leave you in no doubt that even if F. Gregory isn't an angel this episode is about angels. Its curious as to why it's in season 2 rather than maybe in s3 - no angel appears until season 4. I refuse to count Gabriel in s3 as an angel appearance as he's for many seasons yet still just the trickster. So why? Maybe it's to help us understand the significance for Sam? Angels give Sam hope - making it even more awful for him that he is the object of their suspicion. Or is it about the need for faith, which tellingly Dean hadn't got.

#supernatural #spn #sam #dean #winchester

[sabbathics-blog]

hello. my name is k, and this is my first comic. i have never done anything like this before, making ocs and stories about them. only fandom art. but i’ve decided to leave said fandoms and focus on this. no i do not aspire to go to college for art- but it will be a backup plan. but for now, as a hobby, i enjoy art. im sure my style will change throughout the continuation of the comic, and i will probably make more than just this one. this is called high tension. i will not be drawing in this style, it is only for the cover. i want to go simpler for the comic itself. the comic wont be on a set storyline- most likely random things that come to mind. i dont want to feel stressed about this. i want to go with the flow and take this as it comes and take my time. thank you for reading this overview of who i am and my ideas. the characters- their personalities will be explained and portrayed throughout the comic itself but from left to right- a slight rundown. freddy, male, hes 17. he looks like a trouble maker but he really isnt. he has such a big heart and protects the younger kids with everything he has. he lives on his own in an apartment, but visits the other 3 often. he smokes and he doesnt know how to take care of himself. he tries his best, hes really just misunderstood. next, mary ann. mary ann is a hopeless romantic who just loves with all she has. she is so sensitive and carefree, often seen as bossy and demanding. she hangs out with freddy a lot. she is 14 and looks up to him. she wants to be a princess one day, and treated like one, and she always gets what she wants. she likes it like that. at a young age, a very young age, her parents left on a vacation. their plane crashed and they died- and mary was left in the hands of hanna (the girl to the right of her), because she was her baby sitter at the time. she now lives with hanna and taylor. next, hanna. hanna is 16 and she is nosy and protective. she does not like freddy. she thinks he is a troublemaker and refuses to get to know him. she thinks he is a bad influence on the younger kids and doesnt want them being around him. she doesnt like how mary looks up to him, she thinks they would not match well. she also doesnt like how mary changes her fashion influenced by him- because she thinks “hes cool”. she doesnt want mary to get hurt again, but her brother taylor is much easier to control. she is seen as a pushover and suckup at many times. and finally, taylor. he is also 14 and loves his sister , following most of her every word. but, he has a secretive side to him that he wont let anyone see. its even very surprising. he is seen as sensitive and a crybaby, taking things to heart very easily. his sister is always there to comfort him. they live on their own because hanna decided to move out of her parents house and take taylor with her. they were constantly away and had no time for them, so she works restlessly just to pay for taylor, mary, and their bills. freddy helps however. taylor likes playing board games, but theres usually no one around to play with him, so freddy gladly plays with him. he likes freddy, but cant trust him due to the things hanna has said about him around the house, he just doesnt know who to believe yet.

this is their story and how they grow together

thank you so much for reading and i hope you enjoy my dumb little comics.

[miraculous-writings]

IMPORTANT FOR FANFIC READERS!!!

ive gotten a few messages on ao3 lately, about that one AOB fic I wrote, and I would like to say something really quick to the fandom’s readers.   I really do love and appreciate everyone’s support and comments, but.. the ones which tend do go like “I like this because it makes it so hajime pays as much attention to haru as he does shun” and things like that-- I’d like to kinda gently touch upon that as a fanfic author so hopefully the readers can see it a little more from our point of view as well.  I dont believe it is that any of us who write Hajishun are in any way trying to lessen Hajime and Haru’s relationship in our fics. It is just, when we  are writing about a certain ship, our main focus tends to be on those two characters specifically, and not alot of others.  I’ll be honest, I was thinking my fic was including Haru too much. Why? Because at first my fic was just coming to me at random and I hadn’t known if it was going to be a HajiHaru or a HajiShun. That’s the only reason Haru was in it to the strong extent that he was. Further chapters likely wont have him in it as much. Why? Because, in my fanfic, he is not a main character, and as such wont be treated as one. The only ones that will get more screentime than the rest of the side characters are going to be him and kai due to their closeness to hajime and shun of course... but that doesn’t mean they are main characters or will get as much screentime.  It’s hard enough as it is to try and create and push out content, especially extremely long streams of seemingly endless words that flow together nicely enough to create a story and with enough difficult / unusual language for it to be considered an even half decent story and not just me rambling. (on average my typing is actually EXTREMELY simple, tons of typos, tons of shortened words, not alot of punctuation, and i tend to sound like an idiot because i cant actually talk / get my words across well in any way that doesn’t end up being in a story format.)  but, to add tons of extra characters and try to make them relevant to the story-- it gets alot harder. takes alot more energy,  But the big one for me? Is the fact that I frankly don’t know Haru’s character well. I don’t get his personality too much (Despite the fact that a group of friends say they think out of all the boys I am the most, and apparently a lot like Haru.) and as such, I have no fucking clue how to write him. It’s even worse for kai-- personally he is so,,, bland and personality-less outside of his interactions with a select few other people that I have no idea what to do with him. And i could certainly never even attempt to write him if he wasn’t interacting with them specifically because I dont see him having much personality outside of his interactions with others.  (I AM NOT SAYING HE DOESN’T HAVE ONE!!! I AM SAYING THAT I, PERSONALLY, DO NOT SEE IT / NOR DO I UNDERSTAND IT ENOUGH TO COMPREHEND HIS CHARACTER / PERSONALITY PROPERLY, AND AS SUCH I DO NOT BELIEVE I CAN WRITE HIM. This is a fault of my own and not any type of fact-- just how my brain is failing me.)  So here are some reasons people may not be writing Haru and/or Kai in your HajiShun stories as much-- or ANY of these boys best friends/other partners into your ship stories ;  -Your author may not feel comfortable writing that character / his personality for any number of reasons  - That character is not meant to be a main character, or even a side character within this storyline, and as such attempting to write interactions can be considered a waste of time and energy the author could be putting towards the actual main characters as well as their interactions, and bettering those as a whole.  - Writing is hard man its hard to try and write alot for a ton of different individuals  - It’s extremely difficult to dissect a character’s personality enough that you can feel confident trying to write them accurately into a story. It takes hours of reearch and time, rereading drama cds, the wiki, rewatching the anime, looking at the tsukiuta twitter SS, the mangas, canon comics, stages, etc. Looking over all those things and trying to absorb as much information, even the tiniest details, and force them into your memory or rewrite them into a notepad somewhere, trying to find spots in your fic to include this information... its all an exhausting process to have to go through-- for someone your fanfiction isnt even about.  - For some of us, we just dont care about them. Personally I dont really care about Kai at all. And only within the past year have I begun giving a shit about Haru, and that is only due to my friends influences. I actually used to reeeeally not care about him-- bordering on dislike due to other fans.  - We are not obliged to write about characters our fanfic doesnt focus on and its kinda weird that yall,,, seem to expect us to put this level of attention and energy into the ones we arent focusing on? for us its just kinda strange and not something wed thing to do or think is all too necessary, since we dont think you clicked on a hajishun fic to read hajiharu or kaishun interactions;;; And things like that. So do keep that in mind! I don’t mind comments like these and im not angry, just a little... confused by them? And worried that other authors might find them to be bordering on slightly disrespectful of us and our writings / the efforts we put into these fics. it kinda feels like being told we arent doing enough, even though we never advertised that we were doing anything for the subject youre talking about, yknow?  But yeah, thank you for reading! I promise ill,,, uh,,, eventually,,, force myself to continue my fics,,, probably. lol. 

[tumblunni]

I dont understand why wishshipping isnt more popular, like honestly it has the most shippy moments in canon and theres even literally a scene where yugi says "joey i love you" and the anime dub cut it but the manga dub kept it and there was even an interview with the dubber talking about how the line absolutely definately was a thing that really existed in japanese and how important it was to keep it in the translation. Like in context its supposed to be a probably platonic "youre my most important person" thing but the language used is something very close to a romantic confession in japanese even if it wasnt intended to be one. And the early chapters actually had A LOT of moments of like..outright gay jokes about joey and yugi. Again, this is a series that doesnt exactly have ant positive lgbt rep and is terrible and sexist with its straight romance so its VERY unlikely they were canonically meant to be bisexual and canonically having shipping BUT there are a lot of moments that are huge shipping potential AND even literal 'lol look he gay' dialogue. Just like..in a negative 'funny' sense.

And just seriously yugi is so important to jonouchi, the anime cut down their backstory a lot but it was REALLY EMOTIONAL in the manga! Jounouchi used to be a sort of nihilistic bully who just did whatever he wanted because he needed to find some form of fun/outlet for his anger to deal with living in poverty, never seeing his sister, and his dad being an abusive parent. And him and yugi met when jou outright bullied yugi, it was so friggin uncomfortable and sad to be thrown into that as a first chapter when i was so used to him being such a supportive friend. He was just an immature bastard who made fun of the 'weird kid' and said it was because he couldnt stand looking at someone who seemed like..sensitive and honest about his feelings. It was a surprisingly complex motivation for how a not actually very bad dude would become a bully to a dude he like..actually admired and was jealous of, and he was just so wrapped up in his own pain without the words to really articulate why he felt that way. He felt like a 'real man' should be silent aboyt his feelings and never ask for help, and that friendship between men could only ever be non-emotional assholeness where you have to be the biggest jerk and do bullshit together and if you ever show a moment of weakness everyone will leave you. So we have this situation of yugi himself feeling like he's a wimp but to jou he looks like the biggest fuckin badass for being honest about his real self and being able to step outside toxic masculinity even if it means being alone. And it was just so goddamn emotional how the friendship started?? Like jounouchi was just being an immature petty sort of bully but then a more physically abusive bully comes along and attacks yugi, and jou gets attacked by the same guy in the process and theres SUCH A GOOD MOMENT!! Where jou sees yugi and is like "so youre working with this guy? So you sent him to get revenge on us right??" like he's so ready to believe that yugi is really just as bitter and petty as he is BUT also he sounds so outraged and betrayed about it, like he feels he was tricked into believing that good people actually exist. But then yugi runs forward and starts treating his wounds because of course he wasnt actually involved in it. And even more than that, he stands up to this dude who's ten times taller than him and even managed to defeat jounouchi! And he says its because jounouchi is his friend and he "wasnt bullying, he was just teaching me to be a real man". And HOLY SHIT the look on jou's face when he says that! Like he never even considered the sort of awful influence he could be causing on this poor dude's mental health by gaslighting him into thinking 'this is just how men are'. Like he'd got this image all twisted in his head of yugi being some spiteful taunting figure who's always 100% unswayable in his kindness and must only be that way because he doesnt have any real problems or something. And now he's faced with the reality that this dude's kindness is 100% real, so real that he'd risk his own safety to help someone who's been so cruel to him because he saw a spark of goodness in jounouchi's heart that jounouchi himself never saw. And the only thing that could shake that kindness was jounouchi's own words..he had to face how his 'harmless fun' was having consequences and how he came so close to crushing this dude's will and turning him into a bitter bastard just like him and it was BY BEING FRIENDS! the bullying wasnt even the worst part it was the dangling friendship over his head and promising youd care about him if he just jumped through all these hoops to become a hardenened 'real man'. Another hardened 'real man' who was really just a soft genuine man who'd been broken and learned to hide himself.

So yeah jounouchi gets a great redemption early on, and a lot of chapters dedicated to examining it in detail, showing his abusive father and the toxic friends who influenced him into being a toxic friend himself, and how some of them (tristan/honda) were also good people who were redeemable while others (the goddamn terrifying yo-yo gang guy) were straight up criminals that yugi fuckin knife fights to save him from. Theres a scene of jounouchi getting tazed and having glass thrown in his eyes and yugi + yami fuckin defeat a whole damn gang in the most badass way and then yugi embraces jou's unconcious body and he wakes up in his arms and screams his name in relief while hugging him as hard as he can with his partially paralyzed arms like HOLY SHIT TJAT WAS SO INTENSE

And seriously their friendship is already awesome cos jounouchi is a lot more openly affectionate and cuddly than most friendships between dudes in this series. (Hence the gay jokes in the manga...) But having the context of his first manga chapter makes it even sweeter because he used to be such a heavily repressed super macho man who feared even HAVING FRIENDS AT ALL despite desperately wanting them. It just feels like yugi sorta.. saved him?? Helped him recover from that and become more open with his true self. Its so nice to see him gradually becoming more adorable and cuddly as the series progresses, when the absence of that sort of stuff was his biggest problem causing his goddamn depression. And yugi even helps him reunite with his sister and be able to help her get surgery! Is it any wonder that jou is yugi's biggest cheerleader? Seriously when so much of the show seems to sideline yugi and focus on yami later on, its good to have this one dude reminding us that yugi rocks and specifically yugi's 'wimpyness' is actually a good thing nd his strongest strength and seriously!! Just!! Its so good!! Gahh, joey is a big buff scary dude who sees this sweet dude as THE BIGGEST BADASS who SAVED HIS GODDAMN LIFE and HIS MENTOR IN BECOMING SOFT ALSO! Jou has so much fuckin character development that was lost by shortening down this part of the story and only showing it in flashback form a bunch of episodes after the beginning instead of BEING the beginning yknow??

So yeah seriously this entire character arc is so good and this is why jounouchi is the best character and deserved to keep that kind of focus in the series instead of being degraded to more.of a comic relief role. And also this is why thier relationship has such a great foundation and could be even more resonant if it was romantic! Like srsly theres so many parallels here with the idea of a closeted dude that THE MANGA OUTRIGHT MAKES GAY JOKES ABOUT HIM ALREADY

Oh also the manga backstory also adds more nuance to jounouchi and kaiba's relationship because you could see it as jou becoming rivals with kaiba because he sees him as a mirror of the kind of repressed asshole he once used to be. Which is another reason why gay/bi/pan jounouchi just fuckin enhances everything about his entire plot and also the whole series ok yes.

Also i just fuckin love jounouchi please appreciate jounouchi today

[the-benevolent-beast]

How did you come up with the idea for jade?

((**Oh,,, ooOOOHHHH— This may or may not be long, but I will try to sum it up as quick as possible, otherwise I might ramble too much,,))((**Lets see, first I’ll start off with how long I’ve had her- so, its 2019, and I made her in about the 2010-2012 span I think, idk, my memory tends to be spotty, but my point is that I’ve had her for a pretty long time at this point))((**Since her creation, she’s gone through some body changes, but she’s overall kept her black and white colors with golden-yellow eyes and a heart hole thats never changed shape or placement; she used to actually wear more than just pants, and used to not have her more animalistic legs- but it didnt take me too long before I decided to actually make her as animalistic as possible instead of just a monstrous humanoid with fluffy ears and a tail- which yes I cringe at a lot, but we’ve all had to start somewhere, right? And I wanted a more animal like body for her, which is why her legs are how they are now, because I just thought it’d suit her far far better than her old version–))((**If I’m going to be completely honest, and I’ve admitted this before at some point I think a long time ago- Jade’s very first version of herself came to mind and ended up being created because I had just found out about and got interested in the CreepyPasta fandom, and I had found a specific and very actually sorta popular Comic- PastaMonsters (by @/Comickit if you didn’t know which I’d be surprised if you didnt its an amazing comic go read it—))((**Basically that comic gave me the motivation and idea to create a Creepypasta monster character, so thats what I started with. I started with the Idea of a monster-esque female and then I thought of a name. Frankly I actually meant to do a short J name, bc… Jeffery was my favorite at the time, so I went with a short J name that hadn’t been taken yet (to my knowledge) and came up with Jade, with is actually a name I really like as well (so much so that I ended up naming my cat Jade as well but it was fitting- this was off topic sorry))((**But then I added that everyone just calls her Jade, but her full first name is Jadeth, which makes it even more unique and I love it, its oddly elegant, or at least to me))((**Basically her first version was mainly wolf-esque version of a.. s i g h, neko girl sort of, with the ears and tail and a few other minor details like Teeth, while her eyes remained somewhat more cat like- both animals also influenced some of her behaviors and actions… But again it didnt take me long to change her into a far more animalistic and monstrous type of character, while her personality sorta just.. me?))((**That’s another thing I almost want to touch on- Im Jade, but Jade isnt me per say. She’s not a sona, she’s not a fursona or monstersona, shes not a sona- she’s a character that I love more than any other- she’s more of an icon to me to a point- if there’s something I put forward to show or represent me, its her, but shes not a sona or anything-??. I’m Jade, I see some or a lot of myself in Jade, but she Is Not me. I don’t know if any of that made sense but I sure hope it did? Even alittle))

((**I got the overall Idea to make Jadeth because I loved monsters, I loved animals, I was interested in this fandom, that Comic influenced me to a point and sorta motivated me, and after I had made a character- I met a friend or two who encouraged me to keep going with Jade’s idea because they too had created a character for or vaguely for the same fandom- and I think, I could be wrong, but I think we both sorta just kept each other going and made each other brave enough to expand and develop…))((**I had made fan characters and such for things before, just these characters for things I liked- but Jade is the one character (regardless of what she was originally made for, aka the CreepyPasta fandom) that has stuck with me for so long, and I just keep at her. I keep developing and tweaking and having fun with her- so many ideas and there’s so many things I’d love to see her be in or do in the future; like any creator, someday I’d like to see her be popular or a character that a lot of people might like- like a good few key creeps we see today like Jeff or LJ for example. Maybe not so thrown out of proportion to the point so many many many people sorta `share` her, because she is Mine, and I will stress that to the day I Die, but just… have her be popular, or at least known, and liked- you know?))((**This is off topic to her creation but At some points in the past I had always wanted to make a comic for her, in some context, or have her be apart of something big or the like. While her story has never been posted, I have sort of summed it up for certain people in the past. I’ve summed it up and i’ve summed it up for myself, to the point where working on her actual story(stories?) has become sorta difficult to me, but hopefully it will actually get written out fully and posted for all to see and read… Hopefully.))((**At some point I do plan on expanding on Animation a lot more, so she will definitely be a focus of my animations/animatics/etc at some point, which might help how people will see her bc then they’ll finally see her move or at least sort of… and at some other point, I would love to finally give her a voice..?))((**Which I’ll mention is actually My voice, which might also tie in to how closely I see myself in her.. its only because I’ve never really found a voice that I like for her, and my voice has always been her voice up to this point- so I’ve just accepted it and decided that her voice is my voice, and perhaps one day ya’ll may finally hear it at some point…))((**Okay– I think thats a lot and I’ve sorta rambled and gone off topic plenty,,, sorry about that- but thanks for reading through if you did entirely ; w ; ))

[murlinxmaverick]

Max-Q

This is the start. We just made a decision that we must keep. I cant remember exactly what it was but I thought out the whole idea and it was beautiful, sexy, spontaneous, and all that great stuff. But its gone. I cant remember it any more so this is my attempt to remebering it as it was in that moment of escapism. This blog is for you. This is the start of becoming the person you are today, a letter from your past self. I’m making changes to this shit life. I started writing this thing like 6 days ago or something and I cant remember wtf I wanted to say. We had a revelation of what the future can bring if you just put everything into it. I want to break the boundaries and go above the limits of this shit life. 

user912968235, you are no longer bounded to your role. You are free to do anything. lets go to the fucking stars because we are literally ripping the mental shackles off. i can actually feel pain in my arms as im writing this. its probably from the way I’m sitting but I will not let the irony just slip by like so many other opportunities have. And right now what we need to focus on is the shit memory we have, or maybe by now, I have. I want this life to be writn by your hand and not the hand of an other. take control of this narrative, write a fucking campaign like some mad scientist on shrums. Lets fuck shit up. Lets find the love of our life. lets build a home where everyone wants to be, a place where people come and ask to stay. never turning down those you love. family, friends and just great people. 

Lets stay humble and work hard every moment we get. but also take breaks and let loose when the time is right. dont be lazy. because you had loads of time and youve wasted so much of it. But we are at a critical point, Max-Q aint no joke, we can really fuck it up here. We must start to plan out our future. I’m talking self image, ladies and career. we are starting at rock bottem because thats where i am. but not for long. this starship is not going to stay grounded for long. (starshitp just crashed) I’m talking werried i know. i must think about what I say before saying, my instinctive verbal responses are never wha people want to hear, lets start thinking. I have some serioius mental issues and the mind is so powerful. It should be functioning at max capacity, or else whats the point. i need to send this bitch to the garage because its not working right. Im going insane. like you cant stay focused on one thing and because of that you cant remember shit. like wtf dude, just slow down and live in the moment. remember to acknowledge yourself and the little victories. You hear this all the time and its kinda true. buit the difference is no one has your life and no one will ever have your life so no one can tell you what is right. you must decide. i must decide. and i have. i have decided to be an artist, a scientist, a pornstar, and teacher, a great son, a great brother, a great friend to those who are great. Im tired of esisting, i want to live. 

Lets do a recap: 2020 has been shit. I cannot remember shit because most of it you would rather forget. For instance, all the masterbation, the porn watching. you do it too much for not to be part of your income. Be a journalist for playboy or something. like please, get something out of looking at these computer ladies all the time. Diahann got away. that fucking sucked. We tought about contacting Erika, just get her to be a voice actress in you movie. that is your oplan on getting her back. uhm what else. look at how low dropping out of college is on this thing. why? like I really dont care, do I? so yeah we got to get back to that and finish. because we need to be done with it. just make sure to keep practicing and well finish. You did! Music still isnt a big part of our life. the world is at your fingertips and all you can seem to view is shit like google, and social media. this year youve gotten closest to drawing by searching things that influence you. We are going to sell advertisments. but we must build outr protfolio. you Just made the email adress today. that had to have been the easiest and hardest step you have taken. (the first little acievement acknowledged) What else... IDK whatever. time to focus on the future. 

So the plan is to not put somuch pressure on yourself, time to give yourself less to think about. stay busy. dont let anytime go to waste and use it on fewer things. or more things, idk , you dont do much as of right now. But yes. the remainder of 2020 will be used to plan for the future, we want hot chicks lots of money and true happiness in our future. lets get organized and lets change it up. i want three comics done, wake up being the focus, then that adult comic you have in mind with the black market and buying a girl. idk some crazy shit. just do it. let your demons free. think of the craziest shit and hide it in plain sight. fix your car and make it worth driving. because its kinda shit. focus your story to being about reusing. education, and storage. Maximize your brain and push it to its limits. do let the time slip. Time slippage is damaging your tools to grow. Plan on remembering more information. read. write. film. photograph, invest. do it. you cant continue like this. Plan like you are the person you want to be and you will becomethat person. And most importantly, you must reflect, that is the most important part rightnow. Work on a play. Make it powerful. that can be a form of reflection. but make sure you are planning a future that you want. you cannot be successful if you do not.

The girl: this is probably the biggest part to you rightnow. she is going to be everything you want. and you must be everything she wants. so think along those lines and do what you need to do make that happen. she going to be beautiful and you are going to keep being reminded everytime you look at her, and she will know by the way you look at her, wha you say and what you do. fuck her till she cant form sentences. Be that guy, thats who i want to be. i wnat small tits. please. you know!

And take it one step at a time. just try to be productive with your time. Keep learning. today Diana thanked me for opening up to her because when she asked how i was feeling i replied with” stressed horny tired and depressed” instead of the usual “ok” and she really liked that. i need to be better at talking to her but also choose your words wisely, she loves to talk. I dont trust her to keep a secret. that might be a friendship thats worth keeping though, i think her and Nani will get along. 

i am broken in so many ways. and a lot of is is simply neglect. pay attention to it all and fix it. start exposing yourself the be best and become the best. Train the brain everymoment you get. because right now its starting to feel like a burden. like your thoughts are holding you back, but instead they are whats propelling you forward. i am proud of who i am regardless of my past mistakes. Keep yout back straight and head up. 

Ihate doing something and it not being perfect. that is what is keeping me from doing anything, and now i have done nothing. i need to react to not doing something perfect differnetly then i have because i cant keep doing the same things, its whats keeping me back. you are gemini. what ever the fuck that means. if you need someone to hold you accountable, then stream your shit and act like someone is always watching you. Do porn. (<jesus fuck im funy) .

that brings me to the topic of astrology. i am going to study this shit like its some kind of science and im going to use this knowledge to fuck hot women. i swear its going to be a mind fuck of total satisfaction. yes. 

This is going nowhere at this point. back to future me. Adopt a kid and mold that mother fucker into a fucking jem. and be the kind of guy he will always look up to and he will become someone you look up to. acknowledge his ideas as an equal. and get strong. we gotta be able to protect them from anything. 

gotta look good too, start buying like you know who you are. you are everyone and everything is going this way for a reason. i wnat to be responsable and i need to look the part.