#this is why we love robert sheehan

[laurrelise]

david castañeda’s face as robert sheehan talks will never not be funny. come on. look at him.

he is in a state of pure confusion from the very moment rob’s mouth opens and continues to remain in that state of confusion until he’s finished talking again

[catastrophicdisasters]

apologies, i'm still angry abt TUA S4

so, if we take out all of the blatant issues with the season (character assassination, 'resolutions' that create more plotholes than they solve, rushed scenes that make no sense, side plots that go nowhere, raymond vanishing for no reason, etc etc), what are we left with? let's see:

fatphobia (multiple jokes made about 'chubby Diego', when David just looks hydrated and healthy)

SA played for jokes (it's clear that Klaus having sex while possessed is supposed to be funny, but he's being held hostage and forced to do this for money, when we already know he didn't even want his powers back??)

cheating

problematic / borderline problematic age gaps (either way you spin it, either Five is physically 20-26 while Lila is likely mid 40s, or Five is mentally 70s while Lila is mid 40s; Aidan was 19 while filming, and Ritu was 34)

waiting for the actor to come of age before introducing a romance (we already know what some fans can be like over Five/Aidan, this will not have helped; I would be horrified if I found out the show runners had planned a romance arc with a coworked 15 years older than me and then waited for me to turn legal age to execute it)

sexism (i was reluctant to call it that but i also don't know what else to call it - Lila basically had her agency stripped away to become the love interest two men fought over; Steve wanted Five to have a romance and didn't care who with - use Lila simply because she was there)

complete disregard of character trauma (Klaus being buried alive despite it having been mentioned in every prior season that he was locked in a mausoleum by Reginald, including literally being left to die)

possible overstepping of an actor's boundaries (i've not been able to verify this, but i've seen it said that robert sheehan has requested not to do sex scenes?) (still havent been able to prove this; wasn't an issue with other roles so... hesitant to leave it)

actors requests being ignored (David asked multiple times if the Lila cheating sideplot was required, but clearly it went ahead anyway)

bad cgi

that awful vomit montage

Reginald (im not quite calling it abuse forgiveness but uh. it's not far off tbh)

i don't even know what to call this, but basically told the Hargreeves the abuse they suffered was their fault because they shouldn't even exist??

what did i miss? (im sure there's something)

from the replies:

the song in the ep3 dance scene uses a slur for romani people (and is also about a man and an underage girl)

SA dismissal (it's literally never addressed that Allison SA'd Luther last season. like, at all. everything's just a-okay now!)

more sexism (Allison's arc was also reduced to serving men; there's a single line to explain that Ray left, with no mention of why (i could go OFF about this but this post isn't supposed to be about mishandling of characters); even after everything, all her bonding with Claire comes through Klaus's storyline. also, Sloane is just gone and nobody gives a shit - Luther has one line and that's it??)

so many issues with consent (all of the girls shown in the place Klaus works look drugged / Klaus doesn't want to be there and doing any of that, it's all against his wishes / they all get their powers back against their wishes - although they do tell Ben that wasn't his choice to make / Klaus gets his powers back against his will when Allison is pressured to do it to save his life)

[jupiter-letters]

Dating Number 4/ Klaus Hargreeves would include☂️👻:

Fem! or GN! Reader TW: Brief mentions of addiction

A/N: I started Umbrella Academy a week ago and I’m obsessed, I’m almost done with season 3 and I can’t wait for season 4. I’d managed to fall in love with Robert Sheehan all over again and all that love has to go somewhere so here it is.

Waking up to little peppered kisses on your back and up your torso. If you don’t open your eyes he’ll just start blowing raspberries into your neck and on your face. Once he hears you laughing he’ll stop and flip you over. He likes being the first thing you see when you wake up. Some days are a little more peaceful and less silly, you wake to see him still asleep. A mess of curls and smudged glitter eyeshadow is the first thing you see. He’s at such peace and the most still you’ll ever see him. 

Putting makeup on each other, whether it’s going out or just playing around with new looks it doesn’t matter. Being able to experiment with new colors and combinations with each other is so much fun. On date nights you’ll pick outfits for each other, sometimes even just wearing each other’s clothes. Doing things like this with him leads to doing most things together. 

Why have him do things when you can do it for him? Or even with him? He loves having you wash his hair. Showers, baths? Of course we have to both be in there at the same time! Klaus is so touch starved any reason to spend time together he’ll take it,an added bonus is your company keeps the spirits away. 

You’re always in close proximity to each other, so your skin is always touching. Klaus just can’t get enough, physical touch becomes his middle name. He’s a natural affectionate person but just having you near is very grounding for him. 

He’ll draw on you with little glitter pens he carries in his pocket, he likes to call you his “canvas and his muse.” Even without the pens he’ll trace random shapes and words onto your arm or your back when you both lie in bed. Klaus also likes to play with your fingers when he’s bored.

Kissing!! He’s such a fiend for kissing my god, after that first kiss he’s finished. He always says he wants just one but it ends up escalating to a full on make out sesh. Doesn’t matter if you’re public or not you look too good it’d be a crime not to kiss you. Klaus doesn’t really give a damn about public embarrassment, if you wanted him to he’d run through central park naked, he would.

 Once he knows you’re ok with all the random bursts of affection he really piles it on. Neck kisses, shoulder kisses, nose kisses, not one day goes by where he doesn’t kiss you. He kisses like he wants to devour you, if he wasn’t able to kiss you that’d be hell on Earth. If you’re a fan of random kisses at the most inappropriate times he’s a professional. You’re driving, he’s gonna make out with you. Out shopping, kissing! Right now! Doctor’s appointment? Kisses under your jaw in the waiting room, he can’t help it, he's bored.

Helping him get clean, you and Ben have been pretty good influences in his life. Trying to keep him on the straight and narrow for the sake of his health. He wants to be present for you, he wants to be able to remember the things you do together. You help him find fun things to do without getting drugs involved. Taking your time and being patient with him means the world to him. He loves his siblings but they aren’t the best at helping him with it. They do try a little harder when you come around seeing how serious you are about helping him. You stay awake with him when his nightmares get too bad or when the withdrawal is really wearing him down. If it’s the ghosts that are bothering him you just tell them to piss off.(he really appreciates that)

Klaus begins to teach himself new skills to help you out around the house, cooking, cleaning you name it. He doesn’t do it very well but you appreciate the effort anyway. Chores become another activity for you both to do. He’ll even indulge in some of your hobbies just for the fun of it. 

Tattoos! He gets something on his wrist that reminds him of you, he can’t wait to show you too. If you get one related to him, god forbid a little number 4 on you he’ll cry. He does eventually tell you about the rest of his journey in Vietnam and Dave. Klaus wants to be sure you know he won’t compare you to him, He’ll always love Dave but he doesn’t love you any less. He’ll get really shy if you kiss his hand tattoos, there aren’t a lot of ways to fluster him so that’s a good one. 

Being surrounded by death and destruction most of his life really makes him appreciate what you have. The way you indulge in his antics and impulses makes Klaus feel so seen. You don’t feel real to him sometimes; late at night he’ll just lay his head on your chest and listen to your heart beating. 

When some crazy new developments or drama happens in his family you’re first to know. Luther tells him something very personal and secret and 15 mins later he’s calling you on the mansion’s phone. 

Luther: “This stays between us Klaus I mean it…” Klaus: “Of course Lulu I wouldn’t dream of telling anyone you’re dirty little secret” A few moments later… Klaus: “Babe you’ll never believe what Luther just told me!”

He’ll always be looking at you, wherever you are and whatever you’re doing you have his full attention. Klaus will just be gazing at you lovingly while five is trying to talk to him, eventually he’ll just ignore him and go to talk to you. You're his favorite person to talk to; he never gets bored with you.

Thanks for reading! Lemme know what you think. Please like or reblog if you like my stuff.

[air--so--sweet]

TUA Season 4 Spoilers

Not trying to be a conspiracy theorist but it feels like some of Klaus' story was cut or changed in post or else rewritten and reshot. And I think that plot was was about Dave or at least his dog tags.

At Sy's dry cleaners, when he presents the box of alternative timeline objects Diego goes through it and hands items to Viktor and Ben. No one else grabs any items except Klaus who runs over the box excitedly and goes straight for one item - dog tags.

I wasn't able to read these (which feels like a mistake, wouldn't you want them legible in close up to hammer the point home?), but I think it's safe to assume these are Dave's dog tags, especially considering how Klaus interacts with them the rest of the scene (did my best to crop these so you can see him a bit better without totally murdering the quality).

Which really confused me because Klaus was wearing his dog tags at the end of season 3 right? And then I went back and looked at the scene and realised Klaus is wearing something on a chain but at no point do we see what it is because whatever is on the end of the chain is tucked into his shirt. And yes his dog tags are tucked into his shirt at other points in the season but it always just looks like they slipped into the shirt as he moved around, as they're often off to the side or at an angle...

...and even at times switching between inside his shirt, outside of his shirt and then inside it again within one scene (which is not a criticism, it's just the nature of having multiple takes and multiple angles, it can lead to inconsistencies)...

...whereas in the final scene of season 3 they're perfectly placed, hanging straight down and remain inside his shirt the entire time, even when he bends down.

So then I thought oh, it must be intentional. What he's wearing isn't his dog tags, Reginald rebooting the universe clearly erased what happened with Dave. We're going to get a scene something like the scene below from Ain't No Place (To Call Home) by Hara_Kiri.

(Sidenote: Very much recommend this fic, don't love how it ends, but don't still love the majority of the fic and it's a better ending then what we officially got tbh, also dont know if the author has a tumblr but happy to tag them if they do)

But then that never happens and the dog tags are just never seen or mentioned again. But then why have the scene of him finding them in the box? When he should have already had them? And then he still doesn't wear them?

But what really makes me think part of Klaus' story was cut, was the birthday promo video we got on October 1st last year. The cast are all in costume and it says 'previously recorded' because it was released during the SAG strikes, so it was likely filmed on set either between takes or at the end of a day, with the cast just in whatever costume they were in that day. And Klaus is in clothes we see him wear in the season....with all of his tattoos, except the Umbrella, clearly visible.

But then we never see him get his tattoos back in the show??? And this can't just be an error, there's no way a make up artist would accidentally apply four whole tattoos, and then Robert Sheehan wouldn't question it, and no one else on cast or crew would pick it up as a mistake. Like even if this was for some reason actually filmed separately to the show, he starts the season without his tattoos, there's no reason for them to forget that when they come to post the promo. Which suggests there was more to his plot with him somehow regaining his pre reboot body, but it didn't make it into the show.

[glowskelly]

Just a thought...

The way Umbrella Academy fans treat Allison is very much rooted in racism. Y'all use what Allison did to Harlan and Luther to justify your hatred, but never had the same hatred for the non-black characters when they also exhibited horrible behaviors.

The entire family (except for Allison) voted to hand Harlan over to the Sparrows, who were most likey going to violently torture and kill him for what happened to Jayme and Alphonso...

Allison pushed her grief aside when she was at her absolute lowest and decided to help Viktor sneak Harlan out of the hotel. She understood Viktor's love for Harlan and didn't want him to lose a loved one the way she did. What triggered Allison to act out violently was finding out that Viktor was lying to her about Harlan being the reason Claire was gone, even after she went out of her way (and risked all of their lives) to help get Harlan away from the others.

So, why are y'all ONLY hating on Allison for killing Harlan when the rest of the siblings were literally planning on sending him to his death?

Y'all will cry: "HoW cOuLd AlliSon KiLl SomEbOdY!?!?!"

Five, the assassin, would've done the same thing. He made it very clear he didn't give a shit about Harlan. We literally saw Five slaughter an entire commission board on screen in season 2.

(Also - mini side tangent- Five pisses me off for continuously telling his siblings to their faces every season that he doesn't care about their personal problems. Because WTF do you mean you don't care about your niece being obliterated when you told Allison back in season one that you'd love to meet her one day??? I guess that was a lie!)

I've also seen fans attack Allison for trying to torture information out of Sloane as if Diego wasn't right there encouraging Allison to do it. Diego had a knife to Sloane's throat and was about to kill her. But y'all gave Diego a pass and placed all your negative judgements on Allison.

On the topic of Luther and Trigger Warning: Sexual Assault:

Did y'all forget that Klaus started a cult and was having sex with the members of said cult? Which is NONconsensual because you can't consent to someone who has manipulated and brainwashed you into being obsessed with them. Sound familiar? ("I heard a rumor you want me")

What Klaus did was awful and disgusting but y'all will ignore the actions of your white fan favorite characters because they can do no wrong in your eyes. I love Klaus, but I also acknowledge that he is an incredibly shitty person most of the time. Attention-seeking, manipulative, selfish, and in the words of Robert Sheehan: "a sociopath"!!! 

I'm not defending Allison's actions. We should criticize her! What I'm saying is, you can't only shit on the Black woman. Choosing to ignore the horrible things that other characters have done and putting all your energy into hating Allison is, in fact, racist.

I mean, christ, I've seen fans say nicer things about REGINALD than they have about Allison. People were blaming Allison for what Reggie did to Luther and Klaus toward the end of season 3, as if Allison wasn't also being manipulated and taken advantage of by their father. I've even seen people go as far as wishing extreme violence and death upon Allison.

All the Hargreeves are deeply flawed and fucked up people, it's what makes them so complex and interesting to watch. As a Black woman, I'll forever be disappointed in the TUA fandom for choosing to single out and demonize Allison while simultaneously putting her non-black siblings on a pedestal.

[weclassybouquetfun]

Parting is such sweet sorrow and it's true in this particular instance of saying goodbye to the Hargreeves, Sparrow! Ben and Lila.

Final season: fewer episodes, more timelines.

This was THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY series four. More SPOILERS than timelines.

Luther /Number 1 / Spaceboy: I think of all the Brellies, Luther is in a much better place than after the event of last season, despite losing Sloane. It helps that he's a tad thick and can be often oblivious. Even dubbing himself an aging stripper living in a condemned building didn't aspire the hurt it would normally stir up in him when faced with his perceived  inadequacies.

Loved that Luther got his Captain America elevator fight moment (albeit offscreen).

Brothers sharing two brain cells.

Diego / Number 2/The Kraken and Lila: In a show about aliens, a talking chimp and time traveling, I loved the simple story of Diego and Lila's relationship revolving around the complex realities of trying to remain your individual self while having to be so much for your partner and kids. Two lions, caging themselves because of responsibility.

Though it could just be Diego flailing, I think he went into parent mood and tried to shield Five from hitting the dash.

I love that Diego has consistently been about family so I melted when we realize he named his daughter Grace after their mom.

Diego being the one to shut her down and falling back into his childhood stutter as he's doing so remains one of the top heartbreaking moments on the show.

Alison/Number Three/The Rumor: Love that she got a power upgrade. Their leveling up or shifting powers reminds me of Robert Sheehan's old series MISFITS where they all sold their powers, tried to buy them back and ended up with different ones after theirs were sold.

Alison did so much running in the past - from her dark side, trying to run back to her daughter, running away from the family, that I don't think she thought of the realities of what happens when you have (relative) peace and now just have to deal with life. She doesn't have the level of career she had before, she doesn't have Ray anymore. She can't just live in the drama that her family peddles in, but live her life and she, Diego and Lila all wear that weight differently, but they do wear it.

I loved when she said she was done apologizing. She and Viktor have done shitty stuff to each other and things that affect the family. That is just the dance the Hargreeves do. Just dead it and push on because they know it wasn't the first time, nor would it be the last....thought it is the last as it's over.

Klaus / Number Four/The Séance: I've always loved Klaus and Alison's relationship and especially now seeing him in the role of uncle to Claire and I understand why he raged at Alison after she brought him back and not the others who were urging her on. When someone knows you so well, you expect more of them. Alison said he wouldn't want to come back. Klaus' addiction was borne out of needing a distraction from the literal ghosts that are always around him. Then when he gets sober, he is now haunted by fear of losing his sobriety and dealing with mortality. It hurts to be alive and Alison -while not wanting him to die - knew that he would be at peace, but she could not let him go. She could have shoved the marigold in Viktor or Lila's hands and have them give him it, but I think she knew it had to be her.

And what she probably feared would happen, happened - he fell back into his old habits, but with a twist: trying to do Death By Drug Dealer. He wanted his dealer to kill him, but instead ends up trafficked and buried alive, but with a ghostly good boy dog with him. But Klaus needed that experience to appreciate life.

Five/Number Five / The Boy: Every season Aidan Gallagher delivers 150%. It's very easy to look at S1 and S2 and look at the comedic prowess he displayed playing the cantankerous Five, but this season showed how adept he is at a quieter performance. I bet this was how Five in his first decade or two of wandering the apocalypse was. He's not downtrodden per se, but there is a weight; a disquiet about him. He wants to find a way to his timeline, but seems to be hesitant to get too enthused about it because therein lies disappointment.

Which is why I Ioved the Five /Lila situationship.

Five knows what it means to be stuck and he nor Lila knew how long they would be stuck trying to find their timeline. It makes sense they grow close and become a comfort to each other. It makes sense that in their fear and uncertainty that they would want to find a modicum of happiness and they found it with each other. It's lovely. And her returning to their timeline for her family doesn't erase what she and Five meant for each other. I loved that they never had her answer Diego's question of whether she loved Five and in their finally moments she reached for his hand, as well.

Sparrow Ben: Glad to have finally gotten the answer to the events of "The Jennifer Incident", horrified that Reginald Hargreeves was an even worse person than I already thought. I think I would have been more gutted if this was OG Ben, but unlike the Hargreeves, I have not accepted Sparrow Ben into my heart as readily. I mean, glad that Sparrow Ben got some action, but I don't know him like that.

I did love the body horror aspect of The Cleanse, though.

Love that the end of S3 was Sparrow Ben preparing to learn the tricks of the trade so he could commit mega crypto fraud.

Viktor / Number Seven / The White Violin: Like Luther, Viktor settled into their new timeline just fine and ended up with the most important payoff - a semblance of closure with Sparrow Reginald as a stand-in for their Reginald. Getting the validation that he was more than good enough to be in the Umbrella Academy and a vital one of that. S tiered ability!

MISC: Loved seeing the past characters at the end: Grace, Kate Walsh's The Handler, Herb, the blond assassins, Agnes and Hazel!

And yes, Steve Blackman wanted Mary J. Blige to cameo, but she was touring and John Magaro who played Vanya's love interest in S3 had a scheduling conflict.

Other things Blackman couldn't address in the final season/series: He was all for a Luther/Alison romance (YES!), but as people viewed them as you would bio-siblings, there wasn't much movement he could do with them. He also wanted room to explore Sloane and Luther, but couldn't due to the reduced episode order. He also wanted Sissy (Viktor's love interest) to return but Marin Ireland was unavailable.

Though they don't exist, we still get a tip of the hat to our Brellies who sacrificed themselves for the greater good.

It's true.

[sh1tb0i]

once again watched the mortal instruments movie (it’s weirdly become a comfort movie I love shitty 2010s action fantasy film) and the more I watch it the more I notice absolutely none of the dialogue makes sense. I’m p sure I watched a video essay about how the entire 2 hours is just Exposition: The Film and they’re right and every time I watch it it becomes more and more obvious. absolutely insane choice. it’s so exposition heavy that they spoil that jace and clary are in fact NOT siblings and that valentine is lying just in case they never made a sequel because that would be a fucking crazy thing to not inform the audience after they had insane sexual tension the entire film and oh— would you look at that. shockingly, they didn’t make a second one. glad they cleared that up mid way through the back half of the film or the reviews would have been WEIRDER and probably even worse

in fact the entire back half of the film with valentine is so fucking crazy. why’d they do that to him. why’d they make him like that. they did not have to make him like that. yes he’s an insane fucking guy but like they try to tell you “he was once a great man but fear twisted him into this” NO IT DIDNT. NO HE WAS NOT. HE WAS NEVER NORMAL. DO NOT TRY AND PLAY IT LIKE THAT THIS GUY HAS NEVER BEEN NORMAL A DAY IN HIS LIFE truly the mindless rage emanating from this man borders on hysterical there is no world in which this guy was a charismatic leader at any point there was no point in her life that LENA HEADEY as Jocelyn ever fucked this guy to produce one child let alone TWICE

can we talk about LENA HEADEY being in this film!!! Robert Sheehan??? JARED HARRIS?? he was actually in a lot of weird mainstream mid 2010s action films so that’s not all that surprising but like. man. Aiden turner!!! There were so many good actors in this film why did they DO this to them???? what HAPPENED in that writing room I would pay real money to know how this got greenlit im serious

so glad they turned it into a mediocre television show instead at least that shit had time to expand

[blackoutdays13]

Slight mortal instruments spoilers

I just watched Mortal instruments for the first time and I’m baffled. How could someone have a chance with the baby girl we know as Robert Sheehan and then not take it and completely ignore it? I’ve never read the book but kinda want to, cause the movie didn’t make much sense to me. But I hate the way his character Simon was treated. He was so precious and kind. That bitch Clary didn’t deserve a shot at him. I really didn’t like her character. I don’t really know why but she just made me cringe. So it baffles me that she chose Jace when she could’ve had Simon. Simon was just a baby, and I love Robert. So this all could’ve just been cause of my love for the umbrella academy and Klaus. But she still pissed me off.

[imagine-you]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by the lovely and talented @jozstankovich (check out their fics at @mrprettywhenhecries @seanfalco and @myherokatsuki)

1.how many works do you have on ao3? I currently have 41

2. what's your total ao3 word count? 842,003 (I think I broke the million mark when I wrote for bandom...but those fics are gone and dead and never to be resurfaced again...please)

3. what fandoms do you write for? a lot of them. stranger things, the walking dead, true blood, harry potter, marvel, the umbrella academy, the last of us, various horror movies, etc.

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Boys Like You (Steve Harrington/Reader)

Meet Me Under the Stars (Daryl Dixon/Reader)

Baby, You're a Haunted House (Billy Hargrove/Reader)

Somebody to Love (Diego Hargreeves/Reader)

Living As Foes (Eddie Munson/Reader)

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not? Yes. I love comments and they fuel me to write more, but sometimes I'm not caught up on responding, mostly because I get super depressed and withdraw.

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Maybe You're My Event Horizon? It's Negan/Reader and set before Meet Me Under the Stars and ends on a very sad note.

7. what is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? All my fics generally have happy endings, so most of them.

8. do you get hate on any fics? Not recently, no.

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind? No. I did, but now it's just not something I want to write/read.

10. do you write crossovers? whats the craziest one you've written? Yes. Maybe my Umbrella Academy/Danger Days crossover? I've got to finish that one. It's probably the only Robert Sheehan related fic I'd actually be able to finish if I shifted the focus on to Party Poison/Reader...because I'm evil.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of?

12. have you ever had a fic translated? Yes.

13. have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes! We didn't finish it, but joz and I started one.

14. what's your all-time favorite ship? Oh gosh, I have so many, I don't think I have a favorite. If I'm reading fic, lately I am partial to Charles Xavier/Erik Lehnsherr (that whole friends to enemies to lovers thing has a chokehold on me). Writing, I've been more partial to Eric Northman/Reader lately.

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will? probably my crossover fic with joz, because it was a lot of fun, but I just have trouble with anything Robert Sheehan related now.

16. what are your writing strengths? Maybe plotting stories? I've been told that I'm really good at dialogue and that it feels like readers are eavesdropping on an actual conversation between the characters, so that was super flattering.

17. what are your writing weaknesses? getting depressed and not finishing fics lol and probably describing things or like getting *too* caught up in the details and not realizing I just need to move on with the story.

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? It depends on how it's done.

19. first fandom you wrote for? Bandom 🤫

20. favorite fic you've written? I have a very special place in my heart for Baby, You're a Haunted House, so maybe that one.

tagging: all my writer friends who see this and want to do this!! no pressure!

[a-concert-just-for-me]

Whatever hasn't been answered/whatever ones you feel like answering of these (cuz it's a lot lol): 1-4, 6-7, 12-13, 16, 21-23, 25-28, 31-32, 35-36, 43-44, 47-49, 51-52, 54-56, 59-65, 68, 70, 73, 79, 81-82, 84-85, 87, 89-94, 97-100

Noddy you’re insane. But I also like a challenge. Here’s most of them.

1. What were your summers like as a kid? My grandma and grandpa lived right next door, they took care of us while my parents had to work. In the summer, I usually just played pretend outside with my two cousins and sister that also lived next door on the other side of us.

2. Do you enjoy thrilling rides like rollercoasters? Yes!

3. Who was your childhood hero? I looked up to the creators of atla a lot!

4. What is your favorite book? Probably still Behemoth, the second book in the Leviathan series by Scott Westerfeld

6. What is your favorite outfit? Probably my cherry blossom tee with a pink skirt. Comfy and cute.

7. Does seeing people in love make you happy? Sad? Annoyed? Annoyed and jealous, if I’m being honest. I wish I could feel that way. At least as naturally as other people.

12. Iced drinks or hot drinks? Iced drinks. My favorite drinks are iced coffee and iced tea.

13. Bright colors or neutral tones? Hmm. Probably neutral. I’m a big fan of pastels, if that counts.

16. What’s your favorite feature of yours? As much as I complain, probably my squinty eyes. My Dad and Grandpa both have them too and I like that I inherited that feature from them. I think it’s endearing that our eyes disappear when we smile, lol.

21. What’s the stupidest fight you’ve ever gotten into? I remember arguing with a cousin over the phone when I was little on if it’s okay to run a red light if no one else is at the intersection. I insisted it was because my grandpa told me it was. She valiantly disagreed. That phone call lasted forever XD

23. What's your dream date? I don’t know. Maybe a movie or car ride so I don’t have to make eye contact LMAO

25. Do you like parties? Nope. Too loud.

26. Did you enjoy high school? Somehow, yes. I liked band and during lunch I got a break from everyone by eating lunch in a teacher’s room.

27. Who is the craziest person in your family and why? Pfft. Dear lord. Just one? My family has issues. Gonna skip over the mental illnesses and addictions and interpret this lightheartedly. My bisexual??? aunt is the life of any party. She can make friends anywhere. She lies all the time, over the dumbest things too. She is so fucking funny and problematic and I love her.

28. What's your favorite holiday tradition? 4th of July. My grandpa hosts the best party in the area at his house. My uncle and dad are usually the ones that organize it. Along with the help of most other family members who cook, clean, set up, etc. A lot of people come out and we eat barbecue, play games, light sprinklers, and watch the fireworks show.

31. What's a show that everyone loves that you didn't? Survivor. It’s so boring to me.

35. Who are your top 5 celebrity crushes? Only one I can think of is Robert Sheehan. I love his hair.

36. If you could learn one language fluently what would it be? Ugh this is hard. The weeb in me says Japanese. The “language I’ve studied but am not great at” in me says Chinese. And the practicality in me says Spanish.

44. Do you have a favorite quote? “And the universe said I love you because you are love” and “despite everything, it’s still you.”

47. Biggest pet peeve? Someone demanding me to do a task without 1. prior notice and/or 2. me even agreeing to it

48. Favorite personality trait about yourself? I care a lot about fairness.

49. Sum up your type in three words. Goofy. Kind. Introverted.

52. Hot or cold weather? Cold weather

56. Favorite dessert? Cookie cake

61. What's your guilty pleasure movie? The Spongebob Movie

62. What's your comfort movie? Also The SpongeBob Movie

63. Is there a genre of music you don't like? Not a huge fan of country. Or rap with a lot of bass in it. Sensory ick

64. What's an album that you think has no skips on it? Through the Tides by Fish in a Birdcage

65. What's your favorite thing to watch on youtube? Reaction videos and aviation/diving disaster documentaries

68. What are you craving right now? Indian food

70. What's something you haven't done that you think most people have? Been in a relationship.

73. What time of day do you like best? Night

79. Do you like surprises? Hell no

81. What books influenced you most as a child? The Leviathan series, also the Care and Keeping of You books

82. Do you like kids? Yes! They can just be overstimulating sometimes.

84. Any wild stories passed around in your family? Apparently one time my dad and (older) cousin were walking across the beach on their way back to us from the bar and my dad tripped on a cord. The cord came unplugged and he accidentally cut off the music to someone’s wedding. Oops.

85. Do you consider yourself an independent person? Socially and emotionally? For the most part. Financially? No.

87. What was your childhood dream? I wanted to be a counselor to do better for the mentally ill kids like me than any of the “professionals” that handled me did when I was at my worst

89. What's one thing you want to achieve this year? Get a job that doesn’t make me burn out (impossible challenge)

93. What's your craziest work related story? One time a kid bit me on my boob really hard and left a bruise for weeks. One time another kid bit my finger and made it bleed so hard I had to go to the urgent care. One time one of our kids somehow spelled out the word ‘sexy ❤️’ by placing random letter stickers

94. What's the best job you've had so far? Being a carhop. It had a lot of downsides too but it is the only one I haven’t gotten fired/nearly fired from due to my autism swag yet LMAO

97. Are you more of a planner or a spontaneous adventurer? Planner, for sure

98. Do you think you see yourself the way other people see you? No. Depending on the context, most people would either see me as pretty wise and smart for some reason (friends) or the dumbest and most immature person you’ve ever had the displeasure of working with (coworkers). It seems like there’s never any middle ground. I’d like to think I’m in the middle of those extremes.

99. What's the last show you binged? The Owl House

100. What's one of your fondest memories? Making shadow puppets for my sister as we snuggled up in her bed when we were little

OKAY I’M DONE

[laurrelise]

ritu arya revealing that she was rooting for allison and luther may be more disappointing than the entirety of season 4

[conduitandconjurer]

I posted 3,402 times in 2022

561 posts created (16%)

2,841 posts reblogged (84%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@merrilark

@i-seeaspaceshipinthe-sky

@stcndupeight

@positiveautistic

@resplendent-ragamuffin

I tagged 2,259 of my posts in 2022

Only 34% of my posts had no tags

#ooc - 562 posts

#s3 spoilers - 247 posts

#ic - 156 posts

#sexy trash (self) - 149 posts

#show me my silver lining (self) - 129 posts

#klaus hargreeves - 87 posts

#meta - 81 posts

#face (robert sheehan) - 80 posts

#dumb puppy (nathan) - 75 posts

#sobriety is(nt) overrated (recovery tag) - 64 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#he's so desperate to get everyone on board with the character that he still doesn't like but whom he (mistakenly) believes has faith in him

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Okay but I’m going to cry at Klaus’s inherent selflessness.  For years the character has been accused of being the most selfish of the siblings, and I have never grasped where that comes from, aside a societal bigotry against addicts, an ableist victim-blaming mentality, but how can you watch the scene where he is dying, again, in excruciating pain, but using his ability to conjure to help Luther say goodbye to a woman they both just met like a week ago--and STILL call him fundamentally selfish?   He uses these bewildering abilities that have traumatized him all his life, to give comfort to his loved ones. 

I know Klaus is disastrously flawed (aren’t we all) but.  Please do not tell me Klaus is anything but ride-or-die for his family, and one of the most astoundingly accepting, compassionate people in the world. I think what’s so beautiful and compelling about it is that it can also be deemed a flaw--to be so forgiving and trusting that you would even let your primary abuser back into your life, thinking he could be “better now.” Being inevitably betrayed by Reginald again, in the most painfully resonant way, and STILL! STILL! Virtually MOMENTS later, having the capacity to show kindness to your brother so he doesn’t have to feel the pain you felt, of never having closure to say goodbye to the person you adore, and only having dog tags to remember him by. 

I love you. There is no courage quite like compassion.  You are braver than anyone knows. 

211 notes - Posted July 9, 2022

#4

I’m trying to figure out how to articulate how gutted and desolate I feel about the wedding reception scene, where Klaus goes to every single sibling shy of Allison and tries to convince them to figure out a way to save the world with Reginald.

I’m trying to understand why it makes me nauseous and weepy that he asks Five, and Five is for once the one who has given up and is seeking solace in substance abuse, and Klaus lets him with the first expression of annoyed disappointment I’ve ever seen on his face toward a sibling. 

I’m trying to process how I feel that Lila treated him like an agent of malice and threatened to torture him if he spoke to Diego.

I’m trying to not actually outright sob that he called Luther “baby” and “Lulu” and begged him as desperately as during the days when he was stealing money and valuables for another fix, to consider his new addiction--a fictitious, delusional idea of a real bond with their father, in order to “find his purpose”--and Luther is so desperate to not spend the end of their lives in any form of discomfort (understandable and actually, an interesting mirror) that he bellows at Klaus so loudly, that Klaus ends up curled into a ball, ears covered, audibly whimpering.  It was an exact replica of the times in S1 (in the rave) and S2 (being shot at by Commission agents) when he was covering his ears and freezing from a PTSD flashback.  The way when Luther apologizes and hugs him, he just hangs there in his arms and immediately placates with “sure, that sounds nice,” the way he is just USED to being dismissed out of hand by loved ones, even when they have not even a day of existence in all the universe left....

I’m trying to explain to myself and anyone reading this why this makes me sadder and sicker than the actual “bus-ball” scene in which he repeatedly killed himself to find that sense of purpose, of human value. 

How desperate do you have to still be, to be valued by somebody else, anybody else, that you’ll be complicit with your cardinal abuser, and help him to recruit your siblings in perpetuating that abuse? 

I’m the first person to say Klaus has grown in leaps and bounds this season. And yes, I know that his suicide in the White Buffalo Room marks that he has broken free of Reginald and really is beginning to grasp that he has value irrespective of all Reginald pretended to offer. But it’s still AGONIZING. 

And it makes me sad. It makes me sad that he still has this IMMUTABLE capacity to LOVE.  That he goes to Sparrow Ben and softens him and comforts him, gets him to “open up his kimono.”  That he, ONLY he, pays any attention to Allison, and escorts her onto the dance floor, WITHOUT snubbing Viktor:

That he treats Sloane with unreserved happiness, with compassion, and officiates the wedding.  Like look at his face in the bg when she comes off the elevator: 

See the full post

256 notes - Posted August 5, 2022

#3

If he didn’t believe this about every single person whom he loves, he’d be so much better off...but then he wouldn’t be Klaus <3 

283 notes - Posted August 7, 2022

#2

I know a thousand other people have articulated it better than I have, and I miss the days when people listened to my character meta (on other blogs) but it will never get old to me how Klaus cheerleads and emotionally supports others--sometimes deservedly, and sometimes not-- with the blind adoration of the biggest idiot,  yet you can tell it’s 100% pure and with 120% conviction: 

See the full post

299 notes - Posted June 27, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Klaus Hargreeves’s REAL superpower isn’t straddling both sides of the Veil or resuscitating and regenerating bodily damage or astral projection or levitation or even conjuring and exorcising ghosts....

It’s being able to get along with ANYONE and EVERYONE, lol.  It’s making people who hate everyone find him tolerable. It’s his irrepressible affability. Ingratiating is too strong and negatively-connoted a word, but it’s in that ballpark.  Got a new dangerous foe? Just send in Klaus, the funky queer Human Hug, to charm them into feeling relaxed, heard, and valued. 

“Why am I smiling and when did I start smiling?” they think, baffled. Because Klaus, that’s why. The “King of Death” is better than anyone else at making others feel ALIVE. 

961 notes - Posted August 12, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

Listen.

This show has done a lot of weird, magnificent, often confusing things. There have been some banner performances.

But Robert Sheehan acted the hell out of the grieving Klaus in the Klaus & Dave storyline. And the way the writers and directors set this up was *chef’s kiss*

I had no idea, the first time I watched this, why I was crying watching Klaus curl up on the sidewalk to the sound of a sad love song. We didn’t know Dave or anything yet. But I knew something momentous had happened, because they nailed this subtle portrait of one man’s shock and pain and trauma. Big kudos to Umbrella Academy.

He was kind, and strong, and vulnerable and... beautiful. Beautiful. And I was foolish enough to follow him all the way to the front line.

[wasp-coffee]

TMI (2013) live watch (1:36:18)

Can't get over emo Valentine over here being in the institute

Love the ring moment but it doesn't balance out the shit

Why is the armoury so dusty??

Why is Simon here for the Act 3 climax?

Why is Joycelyn in the institute????

This is ridiy

Where is the Jade Wolf

Why is it now a garage????

A SCHOOL BUS????

Just because you use lines from them doesn't mean you can recreate the charm of the book by referencing them

Why does Isabelle have... Potions?

Obvious CGI dungeon is obvious

Too tired for this bullshit

None of these FUCKING circle members have the rune and its pissing me off

Why us alec down for the count? Why can't jace feel it? No mention of parabatai? Why is magnus here????

Unbelievable that there's literally four fucking people in the NEW YORK institute

This third act action sequence is boring. I'm bored. None of this makes sense.

How is there too much exposition for the useless bullshit and none when its difficult to understand what's going on

Why isn't Clary armed at all?

That... Is Luke with a seraph blade? Luke... The warewolf...at least i can see his circle rune now - which shouldn't actually be there

Valentine looks like Robert Sheehan's evil older brother

They all look nothing alike it's genuinely funny

The whole point of Valentine was that he was charming, magnetic, which is how he convinced people to join him

This guy is as charming as chewing gum on the pavememt

(1:47:33)

This reveal is ridiculous and void of any emotion

Im BORED

BORED

This is stupid im skipping

(1:55:16)

STILL BORED

They defanged valentine so bad - one of his motivations was that he wanted his family together, this whole conversation is so ridiculous

Snowing inside? What

YAWN

Mundane hospital??? THE INSTITUTE HAS AN INFIRMARY

This is such a stupid and anti-climactic ending

Suddenly Clary knows runes? Where did we talk about the gray book? HM??? WHERE????

they've given her low budget superpowers...

Oh neat motorbike jace! NICE SHOUT OUT TO THAT WHOLE SCENE THAT THEY CUT

also... And this isn't the most important thing but Jace can't drive

YAWN

BORED

You should be with valentine you asshat go away

Eugh

Why is this here??? Why?

Why are we padding the runtime

I don't care about either of these arseholes i want this shit to be over NOW

This moment on the bike is stupid and unnecessary

Why does jace have only one earring?? That's kinda... Kinda... Gay no?

OH MY GOD FINALLY THE CREDITS

No end credits scene thank the angel

MY GOD THAT WAS A FUCKING SHITSHOW

that was a truly awful ending - no wonder they didn't get a second film

Jesus fuck what a terrible mess of a third act I can't believe people liked this shit

My boy Alec was done so dirty along with Izzy and Jace and, well, basically everyone

[theseancekid]

real talk though, that one line in s3 about klaus feeling like an emptied-out, forgotten ice cream barrel at baskin-robbins is unironically my favorite dialogue of that entire season

[justawaysimp]

Just finished Umbrella Academy Season 3 and here are my thoughts in no particular order

— First off, I am loving the other version of Five we have not seen in the past two seasons: the more “human” Five who laughs along with his siblings, smiles, SHOWERS FOR ONCE, dances, SINGS, wants to travel, NAPS, gets drunk, swears more than usual, and gets weirdly excited over a ball of twine! so cute but don’t ANYONE dare talk to me about him and Delores

— The dance sequences are definitely my favorites in the show! 

— Umbrella Ben 🤝 Drunk Sparrow Ben (but he’s too hard on himself)

— As much as I grew to dislike Allison to the extent that I would slightly itch whenever she’s on screen after THAT scene, I am highly applauding Emmy for such an effective performance and her realistic portrayal of what a mother and a hopeless woman in the midst of the apocalypses would do if she was on the same shoes.

— I don’t know what to say about Luther and Sloane. But their marriage is cute.

— I just found out that Ritu Arya’s a drummer? And that’s why Lila’s so good at it?! Well, she definitely deserve a fresh, new start with her baby and Diego, and I did have suspicions that Stanley’s not their kid in my first glimpse of him. 

— Diego would definitely be a great father.

— Harlan deserved better. And the dog. And Fei.

— I personally think that Allison being the only one having a happy ending is unfair to the others who have lost so much by jumping from timeline to timeline.

 — I also liked how Viktor found himself and he finally feels what he truly feels and most especially, not loved less by his family. Congrats, too, Elliot!

— I actually thought that the Sparrows would last longer that just THAT and the show’s about the two families kicking asses, constant bickering, and arguing and agreeing how and why their own families are better or worse than them but here we are with Reggie becoming another Ikari Gendo all over again but with FOURTEEN Shinjis bound by childhood trauma he himself inflicted upon them just to get sum posey.

Overall, it’s an EXCELLENT SEASON WORTH WATCHING AND REWATCHING and don’t get me started with the casting coz IT’S SO PERFECT!!! Robert Sheehan because IS Klaus and no one could change my mind.