#this is what happens when there's unresolved character trauma

[silent-sanctum]

"Jotaro Kujo is Weak at His Core"

As a writer and avid character psycho-analyzer, I find this concept fascinating because I wholeheartedly agree with what OP has quoted from a "What opinion would get the community to do this? *Insert Johnny getting torn apart*" post.

Before I begin, I know some people will see this, misread it, and immediately say "lmao did we watch the same show? He's strong, badass, and can kick anyone's ass. Like do you know Star Platinum bro?". Trust me, I've seen the replies to this post and they said this same exact thing.

And I'm here to say that to said people, if you truly are not the illiterates I'd like to term you as, you'd take the time to realize that when we say "he's weak", we're not referring to his physical prowess because we know he's one of the strongest characters in the show.

If you don't like to, then you're just proving the accuracy of the last sentence: "You can't stand seeing your edgy badass image of Jotaro as vulnerable."

Pushing that aside, I'd like to expand on OP's opinion/headcanon with some depth to it and explain how exactly he's "weak" outside of being a skilled and strategic fighter.

I've learned that to be holistically healthy, one needs to develop and maintain all optimal functions of oneself: Physical, Emotional, Social, and Mental.

Obviously, Jotaro excels in the physical category. He's conventionally attractive, taller than the average male population, well-defined with a muscled build, fit as hell, street and book smart, and highly in tune with his environment making him adaptable in any circumstance.

He's "strong" in that aspect we all know at a superficial level.

However, we start to see the core problem once we strip this good-hearted man of his physical appeal:

Emotional? He believes he doesn't need to express them to others because why should he. He refuses to process them and instead keeps them behind a locked wall of stoicism and aloofness.

Social? Can't communicate to save his life. He's reclusive and doesn't know how to socialize outside of work. Guarded and skeptical around others. Too much of a workaholic to bother making new acquaintances (if he even knows how) outside of familial connections.

Mental? At 17, he went on a death crusade over Asia and the Middle East, almost died numerous times, and most likely lived with unresolved PTSD that carried over into adulthood, and further deteriorated his already poor social and emotional skills.

What do we have then? If we look past that powerful exterior of a man, we have inappropriate emotional expression, poor socialization, and constant fatigue of dealing with bullshit that relates to his trauma.

And this is what we mean by his "core": His mindset. His inner machinations. The soft spot his enemies would need to target in order to defeat or kill him, strategy-wise.

I. Emotional

We pretty much already know how this man handles emotions. And this may come off as "irrelevant" to the dudebros and the meme riders who believe "haha feelings are for pussies, I advocate for edgy autistic Florida man who don't give a fuck, elopes with dolphins, and berates women".

But believe it or not, he has them, just like any other human being on the planet. I said it once and I'll say it again: Not everyone will wear their heart on their sleeves. Some will convey emotions publicly with no issue, while others would prefer to keep to themselves.

But how does this contribute to him being "weak" at his core?

Essentially, it's similar to how someone with depression may behave (not everyone, some of them). One may appear friendly, sunny, and bubbly to everyone around them, not knowing they're actually suffering from a void that eats them up from the inside when alone.

For his case, it may look like he doesn't care about what happens to him and everyone around him, considering his nonchalant and aloof behavior, but beneath that cold exterior, he cares way too much for his family, friends, and allies. He feels too much to the point where once his allies are endangered, he would sacrifice his well-being without a second thought.

And that's an issue to him.

To him, emotions make him vulnerable and in his circumstance where enemies are actively hunting him down trying to find his weak spots, his emotions should be kept behind doors because he doesn't know how to regulate it on the outside so it's either total stoicism or lashing out.

I found someone saying this line about him that fits him so well: "He's a good person who doesn't know how to be a good person."

This is a man who means well and truly wants to help out of the goodness of his heart, but because of his inability to convey his emotions properly and is unable to pick up emotional cues, it can lead to shit tons of misunderstandings due to inappropriate tone & expression, and that can change how someone views him in the long run, thus leading to unintended deterioration of personal relationships (which contribute to the social aspect of his weakness).

The emotionally-reserved character here with the poor communication skills is the girl. She's a CEO who just received a call, came out from work, and meets with her husband, asking him to accompany her to a doctor's appointment.

I found a visual representation of what I just said above. Just to give context: The show is about a married couple who struggles to keep their relationship afloat, having to navigate through family politics, work & life balance, and miscommunications so they could find why they loved each other in the first place.

Observe how she thinks she views herself VS how others actually view her as.

Other's POV: Demanding, brash, and insensitive Her POV: Anxious, hesitant, and confused

Now remember what Araki had written about Jotaro? "He doesn't believe he must reveal his emotions to others because he thinks everyone can figure him out, leading him to be a victim of misunderstandings. Others think him to be cold-hearted, rebellious, and insensitive."

II. Social

With emotions as our base foundation to poor communication skills, this leads us to his weak socialization aspect.

In a recent quote reblog about how he was raised as a child may have contributed to his tough persona, I mentioned something about his need of "Security".

Growing up, it was mostly just him and his sweet pacifist mother Holly. Joseph couldn't have visited often (he hates Japan) and his dad is a busy musician with a packed schedule on tour. As a kid up to early adolescence, he was coddled by his mother and raised as a good student. Everything was going great for him.

[In popular headcanon] Once he passed puberty, the change to his Part 3 MC era began. People began picking fights with him and bullying him, and he began to see the world as a threat to his safety. Knowing his mother, he wouldn't rely on her to defend him against these dangers. She was too kind, too friendly, too loving for her to deal with the harsh life he now has to deal with.

So he had to be the stronger one for both of them. He already had the physical attributes for it, so why not use it to his advantage?

He got on the popular delinquent trend back in 80's Japan, integrated a couple of cool masculine-esque personalities as his own from his favorite Western and Crime media, and is then able to project this menacing aura everyone should be afraid of, to ward potential threats away from him and his mother.

But Mijin, how does this make him weak? What does this have to do with his need for security?

Think about it: The poor guy's already introverted, doesn't feel comfortable with his emotions that he can't express properly, and now he has to be skeptical with people around him because he realized how shitty society can be, which leads to intimidation that wards off not only potential foes but potential friends as well, making it look like he's anti-social.

On the outside, people are likely to think that he likes being this way when in reality, he seeks a reliable support system on which he can lean onto. Everyone with a sound mind wants that subconsciously because we are social creatures. It's part of our nature.

He's constantly fearful of his surroundings, growing even more vigilant as he ages, but he doesn't look afraid because he chooses to put on a brave face to challenge said fears instead of acknowledging he's scared. I read somewhere in an ask that's not mine that in the manga, some panels actually depict Jotaro shaking/trembling in a mix of fear and adrenaline during some of his fights.

He wants to be around people who he can trust. People who he can lower his defenses with. People who are capable of protecting him just as he is capable of protecting them. People who can face his intimidating aura and challenge it to stand on equal grounds with him or to remind him of his place when he goes too far with certain things. Hence, why he seems comfortable being with the Crusaders.

For once, he wants to feel safe.

To not feel like he has to be this strong pillar of hope that everyone depends on.

To be someone being protected, instead of the other way around where he was always the strong protector. He wants a life of normalcy where he can just be a marine biologist and a professor with a loving family he can come home to.

But that can't happen. The inner circle of friends he counted on is either dead or far away, leaving him even more fearful of the world around him. This results in even more guarded skepticism, always watchful of who's an enemy Stand user and what their Stand could do. Because of his cautious nature, this leads to minimized socialization with others.

With little to no solid support system he can count on, he has no one he feels completely secure with because he believes danger will always come to hurt and/or kill those near him. He doesn't want to burden others with the issues & responsibilities of dealing with Stand users. He wants them to live the normal life he could no longer have.

He doesn't trust in the capabilities of his loved ones when it comes to defending themselves against the amount of potential threats and dangers he has faced, and yet he cares about them dearly. So, he commits to what seems to be the most practical solution in his mind: Self-Isolation.

To be a distant beacon where danger is attracted to and away from those dear to him.

(As we see in the beginning of Part 3 where he willingly locks himself in jail as soon as he sees himself as the threat, and in Part 6 where he stays away from his family once he realizes his enemies were targeting him).

"Your family is your weakness."

All this leads him to become what Araki always envisioned him to be: A lone hero.

III. Mental

Now onto the last part, this part of the essay will focus more on the popular headcanon the community has made about him: "Jotaro has PTSD."

Considering what he's been through at only 17, it would be no surprise that he'd acquired major trauma after those 50 days. Think about it- he gets injured more times than he can count, almost dies numerous times, sees his grandfather get "killed" in front of him, and all this combined with the constant reminder that his mother's life is also on a time limit. A failure to kill DIO meant a failure to save Holly.

The amount of pressure and risk he had to endure for her (and there will still be people who adamantly believe that he hated Holly because he said "bitch" to her twice in the first two episodes).

Now, remember when I said about him having this mentality of over-independence when dealing with stressors? It was still manageable during Stardust Crusaders, but because of what had transpired in Cairo, that mindset carries on to the rest of his adulthood, more so if we consider that he most likely didn't get any therapy or treatment for his trauma.

It might be normal for a teenager to hold onto this stubborn notion of "I can do this by myself" and it's all casual, but with trauma now involved, that notion warps into a persisting belief of "by doing this myself, no one else will get hurt" (i.e. refusing help, doing solo fieldwork, self-isolation).

But Mijin, you keep saying "mentality" this, "mindset" that. What are you talking about?

There's an old Tumblr post I found that talks specifically about this in great detail, but to put it shortly: Jotaro has always wanted to do things by himself because he believes that not only will the task be done with, there would be no one else involved with it, making it better for him to cope mentally if ever shit hits the fan (tying back to poor emotional expression and insecurity in bonds).

If any injuries were to be inflicted, he would be the one to receive them, and he alone, because who knows how he'll react and/or cope when his allies are harmed instead of him over and over again? (refer to the trauma of Jotaro surviving Cairo while the majority of the team that went with him died a.k.a "survivor's guilt")

(Also, refer to how he had exhibited great distress when Jolyne was about to be struck by a rain of knives that Pucci sent)

This might also be the reason why he's more self-sacrificial as an adult: Will be the bait during the rat episode instead of Josuke, takes the brunt of Sheer Heart Attack's explosion to spare Koichi, dives straight onto a path of bullets to save Jolyne, etc.

The only possible solution so he could snap out of that belief he holds on to is that strong, reliable support system he internally needs. People who can help him without sustaining fatal injuries in the process [social]. People who he can approach to release any pent-up frustrations and inner conflicts [emotional].

If he had found those people, then he might have been able to deal and/or cope with his trauma better instead of letting it linger and change his outlook in life [mental].

But we all know how his life went in canon. One moment he's a kid playing ball with his mother, then in his last, he dies by having his head bisected by a time-altering Stand.

Jotaro is a person with a gold heart and a rough exterior. Someone who wants to help and protect his loved ones from the unpredictability of the world the best that he can. But even then, his best wasn't enough. His fear was masked with an air of strength and capability, perhaps as compensation for everything else he lacked:

Adequate processing of emotions.

Stable connection with familial, platonic, and romantic bonds.

A sound mindset that stems from effective coping for his PTSD.

We could only hope in headcanon land that he had a better chance at life in the Ireneverse where he finally could develop his inner core better and get that long-deserved break he had always wanted.

[vael-fire]

Weight of the World

Alonza, an Oath of the Ancients paladin, desperately wants to convince Halsin that he deserves all the love in the world. Aka Act 3 bonus romance scenes my brain invented to resolve outstanding character trauma weeee~ Named for BRMC's song "Weight of the World"... because Halsin.

Tags updated with new chapters.

Chapter 1: Let the Master Become the Student

“Did you wait to tell me that you wanted me… because you thought, somehow, you didn’t deserve to be happy while the shadow curse lingered?” -Alonza

"Every straight-laced, tight-assed paladin could benefit from a sweaty, semi-feral bear-man willing to help him unleash his inner freak." - Astarion

[maelancoli]

Adding Tension After the Ship Happens

i feel a lot of slow burn ships lose steam after the characters finally get together, whether it's just from sleeping together or them actually engaging in a relationship, so here are some ideas for how to maintain steam.

their problems are not solved now that they've crossed the thresh hold

first things first, the plot itself i'm sure has other details than just their relationship. even the most fluffy of fluff has other things going on than kisses and giggles. don't abandon these details once the relationship truly begins. and if there was any kind of unresolved tension point or previously mentioned ex/trauma/insecurity/fear bring it back! bring things back around that might put a strain on a new, tender relationship. this can either make them have problems or be a way to develop their bonds and *show* it in action. any of these foreshadowing/resurrected points can be added in edits if you didn't start out with them or with retconning if you're writing rp/fanfic. all the writers do it. we see it in tv everyday it's ok if u gotta pull a rabbit from a hat.

their relationship will not be suddenly smooth and solid as if they have been married 20 years

okay they kissed/fucked/agreed to be together. now what? what circumstances kept them from getting there sooner? are those circumstances still present and how will they deal with it as a team? you also don't have to have characters officially together once they've done something physical. there is still discussion to be had and boundaries/expectations to establish. those conversations could be interesting to explore. and, even more-so, this is the perfect point for plot to happen and keep them from being able to have those conversations when they should. you can add angst, you can add miscommunication, you can add anything that tickles your fancy. especially a perfect time to have an ex return to cause some tension and uncertainty if they haven't made it official. they don't know what they are yet and that uncertainty is a delicious point to write it and really give the characters a hard time

utilize the main plot's tension

again, if you're writing more than just a contemporary fluffy romance, the romance should enrich the main plot. the romance as a subplot should be a component which merges with the main storyline and does not take away from it. if you don't want to milk the will-they-won't-they anymore than you already have it's time to build the relationship up in the midst of OUTSIDE conflict. let them disagree about how to resolve problems. let them butt heads. let them be scared and do and say stupid shit because they're scared. let them be worried or angry or frustrated and have to figure out how to balance their newfound vulnerability with who they are and were before that point. let them hurt each other a little so they can come back together stronger.

utilize the characters around them

if it is a plot which is mainly romance filled, then think about the tension from the lives around them. think about their loved ones and how their own issues could influence the plot points the characters have to face together. this could be a time for them to be introduced to loved ones. you could throw in a group trip with silly mishaps and shenanigans. you could even have loved ones try to break them up or doubt the love interest. navigating new relationships while also dealing with friends and family can be a source of plot and tension in and of itself. this can be a point to let love interests reassure each other and prove their salt. it can help them grow closer. it can be the heroic moment for one of them to stick up for the other or prove they're there for them no matter what.

overall if you're struggling with what to do after the slow burn feels like it's sizzling out it's time to zoom out. make sure you are not losing the whole picture of their environment or steamrolling past the real development of new relationships.

[maxdibert]

How can you reconcile being a fan of Snape and defending him so much, while also knowing about the terrible attitude he has as an adult toward his students? This isn’t a malicious question,I’m genuinely curious

I don’t justify Severus’ behavior, I simply understand it. And it’s not for the typical reasons like Harry being a copy of James, or Neville being clumsy, or Hermione being insufferable in class, or just because he can’t stand kids. I understand it because, in my view, Severus is still very much a child.

Take Sirius, for example. We can all see that being locked up in Azkaban for so many years essentially froze his life at a young age, so even though he’s old enough to have grey hairs down there, he still acts like a childish, immature person a lot of the time. And well, that’s exactly what Sirius is—an immature kid. He never had the opportunity to have experiences or grow throughout his twenties. Maturity doesn’t come with age alone but through everything we go through during that time and the experiences that shape us. Without those experiences, there’s nothing to build on.

Severus’ case is different from Sirius’, but it also stems from a lack of maturity and the inability to grow. Severus was a victim of violence from childhood, and that violence didn’t end—it continued throughout his school years. After all that torment, instead of leaving Hogwarts, telling everyone to screw off, and starting a new life where he could rebuild emotionally, he ends up trapped in the same school, playing a role to maintain his cover with pureblood families and burdened with having practically sold his soul to Dumbledore. He has no space to heal, no tools to work through his traumas, and no safe, healthy environment to grow into an adult. Severus is stuck in his adolescence, haunted by his past, his traumas, and totally incapable of managing his most visceral emotions. Sure, he’s great at faking it, acting indifferent, and wearing a mask to hide what’s going on inside. But just because he’s good at repressing doesn’t mean he’s good at managing his emotions, because in that regard, he fails completely. I mean, there are so many moments throughout the saga where Severus gets triggered, and every time it happens, his serious, unflappable façade crumbles, and he acts like a kid throwing a tantrum, someone with unresolved anger issues. That’s when you see that, deep down, he doesn’t know how to handle himself, which makes sense because he never had the chance to do so. We’re talking about an abuse victim who, instead of processing and exorcising his demons, had to lock them away and throw away the key—literally the last thing you should do when dealing with trauma.

What I’m getting at is that, on one hand, it’s reasonable to expect an adult to act like an adult. But on the other hand, as I grew older, went through years of therapy, and worked with people who come from messed-up backgrounds and have lived through terrible things, when I revisited the series and saw certain scenes where Severus is being an absolute jerk to his students, I didn’t just see an adult acting out. I saw the teenager he once was, insecure, feeling worthless, scared in the hallways. And now, for the first time, he’s in a position of power where he can say what he thinks and lash out without consequences. It’s not an adult acting here—it’s a kid who never grew up, trying to have the moment of glory he never had. It’s incredibly childish. And I have to say, I really like this aspect of his character because it’s so consistent with his backstory, even though it’s clearly irresponsible and abusive.

Severus shouldn’t be a teacher because someone who hasn’t matured, grown, or healed can’t be a role model, nor do they have the tools to properly handle situations where it’s so easy to project their insecurities and abuse their authority to compensate for their own shortcomings. But we can’t really expect anything else from him—if he were a well-adjusted adult, it would make him an unrealistic character. It’s impossible for someone with his background, without professional help and many years of personal work, to function properly in an environment like that.

[norrisjpg]

scott street - ᴍᴠ¹

in which, the pressure of the 2024 formula 1 season becomes too much for the dutch driver, so instead of leaning on his best friend for support, he pushes her away.

contains: angst, swearing, crying, unresolved conflict, unhappy ending, shouting, mentions of childhood trauma, depression, jos verstappen mentioned (ew), a gilmore girls reference, not proof-read.

max verstappen x unnamed female character

...

...

she thought something was off, something wasn't right - and she was correct.

it was right after the belgian grand prix, after max had lost another win through no fault of his own, after mclaren had gained a few more points on his beloved oracle red bull racing.

she was there, she always had been, waiting for him after the race like she always did. although she had prepared herself, nothing could have prepared her for this.

he knew he needed her, but he was just so wound up, so tired of the shitty car, so done with the team that he couldn't even bring himself to look at her when he walked into his driver's room.

"hey, are you okay?" she asked softly, standing up with the dutchman entered the room, his usual sadness replaced with something else - he was fuming. "max?"

"i'm fine." he mumbled, discarding his helmet carelessly to the floor.

"do you want to talk about it?" her voice was somewhat comforting, but nowhere near enough to calm the pure rage bubbling in his chest.

"no." max sighed, refusing to turn around and look at his best friend.

she nodded, not that he could see her, but it was more of a nod to herself. okay, he doesn't want to talk, that's okay. but she also wondered if he knew it wasn't his fault, because he couldn't help a ten-place grid penalty brought on by his team, and he certainly couldn't help that the mercedes were exceptionally quick today and being held up by cars he was lapping wasn't helping him either - it just wasn't his fault.

of course, she knew he'd be annoyed about his race - but that wasn't the route of his emotions, his father was. max had obviously told her about the traumatic events of his childhood, long after they'd happened, although she was around when most of them took place.

however, she didn't bring it up.

"max?" she spoke quietly, her voice a little airy. "it's not your fault, you know that, yeah?"

"i know it's not my fucking fault." he spat back quickly.

"come on, max, please talk to me." she pried a little more. "it hurts to see you like this."

"oh, it hurts you?" he scoffed, finally turning around to look at her, anger ever-so-present in his pretty eyes. "how the fuck do you think it makes me feel? you always manage to make everything about you, don't you? just can't stand the attention being away from you for just one fucking second, can you?"

it took everything in her to not physically recoil at his words - he'd never ever been like this, and she wasn't going to lie, her heart shattered at his cold attitude toward her. she was only trying to help him and he was acting like this.

"nothing to say, huh?" he almost laughed, but there was nothing resembling a smile on his face. "you know what? just get out."

"sorry?" was all she could muster, an expression of hurt confusion on her face.

"you heard me, leave." he repeated it, squashing her hopes that he was just angry and didn't mean it, that he'd apologise and lay in her arms and just tell her how he really felt.

she got up, putting her phone back in her pocket, glancing over at him to see that he'd turned back to desk, fiddling with something on there.

hearing the door shut behind her was confirmation of what he'd just done - why the fuck did he do that?

head in his hands, he slumped down on the couch, already missing her presence. clearly, max hadn't meant any of that, but it was like word vomit. he felt as if he was floating outside of his body, watching him shove his best friend away, and he couldn't do anything about it.

outside, she stood there, motionless. what the fuck had just happened? gritting her teeth, delicate tears fell down her cheeks as she started to walk out of the red bull garage in aimless despair.

maybe if she hadn't said anything he wouldn't have lashed out of her? did she pry too much? why wouldn't he just talk to her?

"ah, good afternoon." a familiar voice came from behind her as she stood in the paddock, unsure of what to do with herself.

daniel ricciardo.

"oh, hi daniel." she thumbed away the salty tears and sniffled before she turned around - but it was no use, daniel caught on straight away.

"what's wrong?" he furrowed his eyebrows, putting a hand on her shoulder.

she knew there was no point in lying, daniel would get it out of her eventually. "max kinda... blew up at me? told me that i make everything about me and then told me to leave- don't say anything to him though."

"you know i can't promise that, but are you okay?" he shook his head, mentally noting to bring that up with max in the near future.

"i'm not sure."

...

a pretty afternoon in monaco had brought about a lunch between max verstappen and daniel ricciardo. a whole week had passed since the incident, and neither had spoken to each other - both absolutely terrified of what the other would say.

max was scared that she'd push him away, the same way he did. she was scared that max didn't want her back.

the reality was, max needed help - he needed her back. since his outburst, things had gone downhill. the car wasn't looking as good as he'd hoped in the factory, one of his cats was ill, and someone had rear-ended his car somehow - it was as if the universe was screaming at him to just apologise to her, get in his car and go to her apartment, tell her he didn't mean any of it and then finally tell her how he really felt - but max verstappen had fallen deaf, clearly.

luckily, daniel ricciardo hadn't.

"max, what is going on with you?" he asked as the two sat on the bench, slightly hot from the round of padel they'd just played.

"what?" he scrunched his nose at the australian, glancing at him briefly.

"you." daniel repeated. "you're drinking way more than usual, i'm the only person you've seen other than for work purposes, and then you pushed your best friend away - god, why did you push her away?"

"how the fuck do you know about that?" max snapped, quickly apologising with a look afterward. "sorry, how do you know about that, though?"

"she was crying in the paddock after the race." he nodded, pursing his lips. "told me what you said."

"i didn't mean to, okay? i miss her. i know i shouldn't have said what i said, but i can't undo it. i just... i'm scared- what if this is it? what if she won't take me back this time?"

"max." daniel said firmly. "i promise you, that girl will always take you back - you could kill someone and she'd still stand by your side."

"what have i done, daniel?"

...

she was more okay than she thought she was going to be. monday evenings were always reserved for max - dinners, movie nights, whatever they decided to do, it was together.

this monday night was different though.

there wasn't the familiar dutch laughter bouncing around her apartment. there wasn't the delicious smell of home-cooked food lingering in the corridor. there wasn't the colour of freshly bought tulips adding to her plain white kitchen (max always gave her pretty flowers when he came over.) and there certainly wasn't the comforting smell of max's aftershave stuck on her cushions anymore.

it had been three weeks and no word from him.

maybe it was time to move on. maybe he wasn't coming back this time.

she decided early on that it was his decision to return - he was the one who pushed her away so why should she make an effort? in no way was she saying it was for the better, but she was... relatively okay. yes, of course there were things she missed about him - no one wanted to do anything on a monday evening apparently.

so, she spent her monday evenings alone, drowning herself in blankets and fast food, watching some movie that she would never even the end of of - because she fell asleep every time, without fail.

so she did move on.

max on the other hand? he was moving backwards - rapidly.

he thought he was borderline depressed. rotting in his apartment with his cats, occasionally venturing out of the house to buy food or see daniel and lando - but that was it. it was as if all the life had been sucked out of his existence - all the colour, all the light.

so, when he turned up to her apartment on a rainy monday evening, it was a knife to the heart, to the head, to the gut.

he walked into the lobby, planning on going straight up to her and confessing every single feeling he'd had since that dreadful day in belgium.

but, he was met with an unexpected sight. there she was, smiling, with a man.

she was laughing, with him. they were walking towards her apartment, about to head into the elevator. if they were on normal terms, max would have waltzed right up to her and asked who he was - but he didn't have that privilege anymore, remember?

so, he turned around, shocked and almost reduced to tears, and he left.

if only he knew, she would have run to him in a heartbeat.

but, maybe it was for the better.

...

coming next... novacane, ʟɴ⁴ motion sickness, ᴍᴠ¹ (part two)

[hugthesquids]

Garnet's biggest flaw

So I’ve seen many people in the fandom state that Garnet has no flaws or virtually no flaws outside her co-dependence in the form of Ruby and Sapphire. But that’s not true.

No character is perfect and Garnet is no exception as she carries with her some fundamental flaws that I find interesting exploring. In fact, her flaws are in a way very ironic to her character.

Btw she’s an excellent character and this is by no means to discredit her or anything. If anything, I think it’s good that characters have flaws and aren’t perfect as it gives depth to them, and SU is all about not putting anyone on a pedestal.

(There is a TLDR at the end)

Garnet is bad at communicating

Despite often preaching about the importance of communication in any relationship, Garnet has major trouble in this department.

Even after Garnet opens up later on in the seasons, she still struggles in this aspect.

There are many times where Garnet doesn’t explain a thing to others like Steven, and because of this lack of communication, he ends in trouble. In fact, Garnet often resorts to letting her actions speak for her.

And with Steven in particular, someone who needs guidance, it becomes a tough point for him. And it often lands him in trouble.

In a way, Garnet acts like the subversion of the old troupe of “learning your lesson the hard way”. She follows this line of reasoning, and yet she fails to consider that this isn’t a healthy way for Steven to learn. SU likes to subvert classic cartoon troupes, deconstructing them like how all the cartoony heroic adventures were actually traumatising for Steven and hindered his development in a healthy way.

So letting Steven “learn his lesson” with stuff like the proposal in SUF, it actually became the turning point in him spiralling so badly.

It hurt him so much (already dealing with a loss on what to do in life, losing trust in those nearest to him, losing his support system, lots of unresolved trauma bubbling through as Steven freshly processes how screwed up his life was and why he’s struggling so much now), and it essentially started the huge domino effect to what later happens in SUF.

(I’m not excusing Steven’s own actions, though as we’ve seen, he has things that contributed to the path that was taken. For this post, I’m focusing on Garnet’s stake in all this.)

The proposal, a point of neglect

I think the proposal especially highlights this weakness from Garnet in several ways. First a little background from Steven’s PoV.

He reached out to a guardian that he trusted and admitted he didn’t know what to do with his life, who only turned back and said he should’ve known better and he was dumb for listening to Ruby and Sapphire.

This is when we’ve just learned that Steven was scared at opening up to people because he’s afraid that it’ll push them away but Steven anyway worked up the courage to ask Garnet, who only told him she didn’t have time for him and let Ruby and Sapphire take charge.

This is also just after learning that Steven wasn’t socialised properly and doesn’t understand human conventions too (so he didn’t know it was weird to propose as 16 either. Most of his knowledge comes from cartoons and other media, where Steven himself loved reading books about adventures falling in love like The Unfamiliar Familiar, so this stuff was normal to him. Still not okay, but he was neglected socially.)

(Btw this also adds to Steven’s frustration with his dad later on, as the proposal stuff hurt so much and he didn’t know it was a bad thing to do as Steven was unfamiliar with human stuff and what to even do with his life and his dad didn’t provide that guidance and neither did the gems.)

Steven isn’t the one that brings up the proposal, that is a very important fact.

Steven opens up to Garnet, who dismisses him and lets him talk to Ruby and Sapphire, who are the ones that tell him to propose. Ruby eggs him on even as he goes “really?” and even then he doesn’t immediately do it but double checks by going to Sapphire, the one that Steven trusts to be the logical one of the pair. Ruby and Sapphire are still his guardians, and Steven has made it very clear that he struggles with knowing what to do with himself.

So imagine the betrayal that Steven feels, when his guardians, the ones he trusted and had trouble opening up to but decided anyway, just brushes his feelings off and makes it all his fault for trusting his family, essentially calling him dumb and makes it all about being a hard lesson for he himself not realising it was a foolish idea.

We as the audience know he didn’t have the tools to know, neglected socially and traumatised, and that he was in a very bad headspace.

And even the gems have seen Steven has not been in a great headspace for a while prior to this.

Robbed of agency

But because Garnet just accepts the future she “sees”, expects it to come and sees it as inevitable, she forgets to take responsibility.

She didn’t help him afterwards even if she could. She didn’t tell the other gems and left him all night and day after to be alone in his slump even though Garnet knew he was miserable and in a sensitive spot and wanted to reach out for support (like calling Greg). Instead he was left to spiral in those bad thoughts and feelings with no sympathy or aftercare.

Garnet let her role as Steven’s guardian slip.

She essentially robs both Steven’s agency with the proposal by saying it was inevitable, but also robs herself of her own agency to act. All because she believes her visions are certain and there is no reason to act otherwise.

But we know this is false, her visions aren’t certain!

Future vision

Garnet’s “visions” are merely calculations. She doesn’t see the future but calculates likely outcomes. Garnet herself has admitted that several times, but continues to contradict it as she still falls back to her habit.

Sapphire’s future vision coupled with Ruby's influence that lets her see multiple outcomes, gives Garnet the notion that she knows what will happen.

Steven's complaint that Garnet thinks that she "knows better" is an interesting one, because in a way, he’s right.

Garnet inadvertently robs other people of their agency by over-relying on her visions. In her eyes she knows they won't change, that they will always do this.

And that also inadvertently robs herself of her own agency.

It’s kind of ironic too, because if she truly could see the future in all certainty, she should’ve known that Steven would spiral badly after the proposal and needed support. But that’s the thing, Garnet doesn’t know better, she doesn’t see everything or every outcome.

The biggest irony of this is that despite Garnet being a fusion, has a whole spiel about how conversation is important in any relationship, how her own existence was due to Ruby defying what Sapphire “saw”, Garnet herself is often a hypocrite to her own ideals.

The episode "Future Pool" is proof that her vision is flawed, as it isn't really future vision, but a probability calculator based on the facts she knows (which is also why Garnet never predicted Rose being Pink Diamond or all other numerous surprising things). Even Sapphire in SUF shows it’s all a probability calculation that she’s running.

Even Garnet didn’t predict Bluebird to turn on Steven and all and try to kill him. If she even “saw” that possibility, she didn’t even warn Steven and she egged him on to give her a chance.

But ironically, Garnet didn’t really “learn her lesson” in these episodes, did she? Not the crux of it at least. Her future vision was getting more and more inaccurate in “Future Pool” as she couldn’t get a read on how Steven had grown as a person and wasn’t behaving as expected.

But instead of stepping back and assessing whether she should reconsider her relationship with the ability, as Steven tires to nudge her to think for herself instead of over-relying on visions that aren’t set in stone, Garnet goes back to the same as usual as she learns Steven had matured and factors that in to get back her more accurate future calculations.

Pink’s palanquin

Another example of Garnet robbing people of their agency and being bad at communicating is when Greg was kidnapped by Blue Diamond.

Instead of communicating to Steven that Blue Diamond was in Korea and that she would kidnap Greg if they went there, she just told him to not go.

Steven was at this point super frustrated at the gems not telling him anything and not communicating, while his rising frustration (and trauma) with the gem stuff was rising and he didn’t want to be constantly dismissed and denying knowing about this gem past that was affecting him so much now.

But again, Garnet is bad at communicating.

And when Steven goes to Korea, she robs Steven of his agency by saying this would've happened regardless.

Realistically speaking, if Garnet sat down and talked with Steven, acknowledging his feelings instead of dismissing them and how he felt about his heritage and Rose, (which has been a huge contributor in going into Korea in the first place, being denied his feelings) and Garnet actually explained Blue was there and the consequences going there, Steven would've likely not gone.

But in this twist of irony, Garnet denies her own agency with her flawed view on her vision, doesn't make an effort in communicating with Steven, it ends up fulfilling her vision.

Denying responsibility

It's very interesting that being the leader of the team, the one everyone looks up to, she sometimes struggles acknowledging fault or responsibility.

It’s not that she doesn’t ever not admit fault to something, she has admitted plenty of times. But there are times where she’s steadfast in not having any responsibility or that she had a part in too.

And this stands as an interesting contrast to her companions in the cast, Amethyst and Pearl, who are often confronted with their issues and are expected to change their mind or admit fault.

But there are many times where Garnet simply denies her doing anything wrong. And being the de facto leader, it gets accepted.

Garnet was still very responsible for the proposal thing. And even if Ruby and Sapphire were the ones telling Steven to propose, Garnet could’ve unfused, let the two of them take responsibility and apologise to Steven.

She just brushes it off as them being lovebirds so it’s okay for them to almost ruin Steven’s closest relationship and pins it as his fault for trusting them, despite them being his guardians who he opened up to with a sensitive issue. She denies Ruby and Sapphire their agency and even justifies their bad behaviour because love (but at the same time faults Steven to act on his emotions, despite being actually considerate enough to ask his guardians whether this was a good idea).

Garnet is still responsible for Ruby and Sapphire, because even if Garnet is technically her own person, Ruby and Sapphire are still a part of her and the two of them can choose to become her at any time just as Garnet can choose to become Ruby and Sapphire any time.

Fusion

And that’s another flaw Garnet has. She thinks she “knows better” about fusion, just because she’s a permafusion for thousands of years.

And while she does have a lot of sage and good advice about fusion

She still has her flaws about it. And often lets fusion become a scapegoat for her own responsibility or other people’s.

Like when Sugilite runs rampage.

They don’t even apologise to either Steven or Pearl for all the hurt Sugilite had caused (heck, she almost seemed fine with killing Pearl or at least being fine with all the destruction she caused. Steven even had his bones cracked when a huge boulder hit his face due to Sugilite).

Even if Sugilite wouldn’t be able to apologise, Garnet and Amethyst still could as it was their decision to fuse in the first place even with Pearl’s warnings that they tend to lose control. In fact, Garnet was the one to bring up fusing with Amethyst in the first place.

The only comment Garnet makes afterwards is how Sugilite overworked their bodies and that’s why they’re tired at the end of unfusing. No apology for the hurt they caused.

It’s an interesting contrast to how other fusions act.

Smoky is still apologising on Steven’s behalf with the havoc caused in “Guidance”. Steven apologises to Mega Pearl for Pearl and Pink Pearl, since the trip to the Reef didn’t turn out well. Even Stevonnie is treated as both their fusion and Steven and Connie, and Stevonnie treats themself as that too.

Meanwhile Garnet flip flops between being the result of Ruby and Sapphire’s actions to having no responsibility for Ruby and Sapphire.

Garnet even excuses Bluebird, saying Steven can’t judge her just because she’s a fusion of two of Steven’s enemies that wanna murder him. Which first of all, that was his house and he has every right to not want some strangers invited in there, let alone the fusion of his previous murderers.

Second of all, he absolutely can judge people based on their components. In fact, Garnet is yet again a hypocrite as she really likes Stevonnie, Smoky and all the other fusions because they’re the fusions of their friends. She doesn’t treat them as just their own people, the components matter too with the relationship she has to them. Garnet likes Fluorite, sure, but she isn’t family. But Smoky Quartz is family even at first sight, just because they’re a fusion of Amethyst and Steven.

Reflection

Garnet is by no means perfect, and that’s what makes her a good character. She has flaws like everyone else, just as she has strengths like everyone else.

She doesn’t mean ill with any of this. A lot of it is her being well-meaning too, and she tries a lot to be a leader for the team which is a tough spot.

In fact, being thrust in a leader position is probably why Garnet started over-relying on her future vision. She had to fill the spot Rose left for them, be the mature one as everyone processed their grief and keeping the team together, especially how prone to conflict Pearl and Amethyst were with each other earlier on before Steven stepped up to be the heart of the team.

So it just becomes this interesting if a little tragic and ironic thing that the very things Garnet preaches about and is a symbol of that others look up to, are the very things Garnet is really bad at.

TLDR

While Garnet is often seen as flawless or nearly perfect aside from her fusion with Ruby and Sapphire sometimes showing co-dependence, she does have significant flaws. Her biggest flaw is poor communication, which contradicts her emphasis on its importance in relationships. This flaw becomes especially apparent in her interactions with Steven, where her lack of guidance contributes to his struggles, such as in the proposal situation and the Korea thing.

Garnet’s over-reliance on her future vision also leads her to undermine others’ agency, assuming outcomes are inevitable rather than communicating and acting on them. This creates a paradox, as Garnet’s vision isn’t always accurate, she knows it isn't, she knows it isn't really future vision but a probability calculator and she often has blind spots and she herself is a result of that blind spot.

But Garnet still falls back to treating her visions as inevitable and misses opportunities to protect or support others, including Steven, by denying their and her own agency. Additionally, she sometimes avoids taking responsibility, particularly when it comes to the consequences of her lack of communication, and also using her future vision and fusion as an excuse in certain aspects.

Despite these flaws, it makes Garnet a more complex and compelling character, as dealing with her leadership role she was forced into after Rose's absence. Acknowledging her flaws gives depth to her character and emphasizes the show’s theme that no one is perfect.

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

There's something in the differing emphasis that Brad and Hunter and Charles place on the phrase "good guy" that really affected me on my first watch and hit even harder on my second. I'm going to try and put it into words.

When Brad and Hunter say it, they say "we're good guys", as in, good at everything a guy "should" be good at - good at sports, popular with the ladies, on their way to a good university. But they turn out to be total shitheads. They don't care about being "good", they just care about their reputation, how they're perceived. It's status and power - they're good guys and they feel entitled to do whatever they want.

But when Charles, feeling betrayed by this reveal of their character, says he wanted them to be good guys, the emphasis is completely different. Charles wants to be a "good guy". He doesn't want to be a "bad guy".

The emphasis is on good, because that's really the crux of Charles' greatest fears, isn't it?

When Charles wants to be a good guy, he doesn't mean it the way Brad and Hunter do; that veneer of goodness that comes with popularity. He means that nothing he did was ever good enough for his dad. Doing the good thing and helping that kid his "friends" were beating up literally got him killed. Trying to stop Devlin only got him trapped in the loop, stuck until his friends freed him, only able to watch helplessly as a mother and her innocent children get slashed to death before his eyes.

And it's this helplessness that is the thing that truly sets him off at the end of episode 4.

It always struck me just how much of his breakdown there, for as much as he finally gives a voice to his own hurt at the injustice of his situation, was still about other people. Because he was secure-ish, at one point, when he was Edwin's partner and protector. He thought he did a good job at it anyways, but guess not, because something obviously happened with Edwin and he's not talking to him about it. And he likes to think he did good with solving cases, but Crystal is still hurting and haunted by a demon and nearly threw herself off a cliff earlier that day because she wants her parents so badly, and he's no closer to helping her solve that. And all of it, every single part of it, is a reflection of his own unresolved trauma; that he never "made it better" and he can't, so now he tries to be good enough for other people, but that isn't working anymore either, and now someone is threatening to take Edwin away, and even this final shocking act of anger and violence is still in service of protecting; of saving someone from the suffering he was never able to escape except by fucking dying.

His anger, really, stems from the injustice of it all, and the abuse of power by guys who can get away with it because they're guys, when they should've, could've, been good to others instead. It's a large part of why he projected so strongly onto Brad and Hunter - they did everything right, they were good guys who got screwed over, because even if everyone seems to love you, there's always that one person you can never please, right? Who will hurt you, no matter how good you are. When it's revealed that Brad and Hunter are far more like his bullies, like Devlin, like his dad, than he'd thought - controlling, intolerant, cruel to those who "step out of line" - Charles feels betrayed and horrified because he related to them... so what does that say about him?

But here's one major difference that Charles does not seem to recognize well. Charles has never had the power in these situations. He was the victim, and his being the victim is through no fault of his own, but the fault of those who decided to be cruel. It is certainly not contingent on how good he is. Being good in the eyes of people who want to hurt you will not stop them from hurting you.

When he lashes out at the Night Nurse, it's out of helplessness and rage. Once again, he's pitted against someone who holds more power than he does and is threatening harm, and he's just been bitterly, brutally reminded that a smile and a helping hand and a firm word never, ever worked to make it stop. There's only one other way he can think of to shift the balance of power, and he's finally livid enough to actually do it. This violence is a desperate attempt to finally overcome yet another force much greater than him, a transdimensional entity that has unjustly arrived to take his best friend to Hell. And Charles wins, he did it, he stopped her, at least for the moment. But at what cost, when he looks at his friends and can't tell whether they look more scared for him or of him? And can he blame them, when he's clearly scared of his own anger and how overwhelming it is now that it's been let out?

Because he tries so hard to be good and it's never good enough to stop the suffering. Because that anger rose to the surface so easily and maybe that means he's not good at all.

But of course, Charles once again misses something important here - there is a distinction in why that anger exists. His dad, Devlin, and Brad and Hunter get angry because their power over others makes them feel they have a right to punish when things don't go their way. Charles gets angry because he feels more helpless than he'd care to admit, and seeing cruelty inflicted onto others by those with power makes him want to cut them down to size.

And herein lies the second major difference. Charles... is a kind person, at heart. He's genuine. He really does likes helping out, he likes making people happy, he doesn't turn people away who need help, he's friendly and protective. The scene where Edwin pulls him out of his fear that he's somehow bad even though he really doesn't want to be, is outright one of my favourite scenes for what it brings to both of their characters. Edwin knows exactly what to say. While it's always good to check your behaviour, to apologize and take accountability - because no one can be good all the time, and even the most well-intentioned of us will mess up sometimes - Edwin is right.

"Bad guys do not worry about being bad guys."

[runabout-river]

Yuji's accumulated Trauma

After Choso's death, I've been thinking about Yuji's reaction to it. At first glance, it looks mature and composed and obviously Yuji doesn't have the time and privilege to grieve. More importantly, Gege didn't give Yuji any panel time to be distraught; his aniki's death scene was over pretty fast. The 3000 Shibuya deaths in conjunction with Nanami's and Nobara's deaths on the other hand had been given more time and more impact afterwards.

The difference in reaction between those two times makes sense in context but, in my opinion, not with Yuji being mature and composed about it.

Because Yuji never got over Nanami's and Nobara's death, he didn't heal from that, instead, he had a negative character arc where the trauma of their deaths affected his world view and mentality in significantly bad ways.

He started to think of himself as a cog in a machine and he also identified with Mahito, the curse who killed both his friend and his mentor figure, a villain and his personal antagonist. Yuji did not overcome Mahito in Shibuya, the story makes us forget that often times. He was marked and changed by Mahito and even though that curse ended up with an extremely pathetic death that didn't mean that he hadn't broken something inside Yuji.

The only time where Yuji constructively dealt with that trauma was in his fight against Higuruma but that was only about his guilt over letting Sukuna kill 3000 people with his body. And it didn't get resolved completely, at least not in a way that would've helped with dealing with Nobara's and Nanaimi's death too.

Yuji is taking that trauma from Shibuya, his feelings of weakness and guilt, and he puts them into believing himself to be a machine that has to follow a predetermined path. Before Sukuna took over Megumi, that meant being suicidal when the situation called for it. Yuji wanted his life to make sense again and dying so Angel would've her wish of seeing Sukuna dead to save Gojo perfectly fit into that.

After Sukuna possessed Megumi, his path and role stayed the same except killing himself directly was off the table but that tendency still exists inside of him. If he were to be presented a way to defeat Sukuna while saving Megumi at the same time where he would die as a result he would take that path immedietaly without hesitation.

Back to Choso's death. In my view, this unresolved trauma and his lack of will to live lead to an unhealthy coping mechanism: thinking of his friends and allies as already dead. We can see that when he asked Megumi if Nobara had survived Shibuya.

He knew that there was a slim chance she survived but it was so low that she was basically dead. When Megumi confirmed her fate, Yuji was prepared for it. Prepared to receive the bad news so instead of crying again he could function like the cog he was supposed to be.

And this Mahito-infused cog mentality still follows him until now. He has to function so his role can be fullfilled and when that means he has to think of his friends as having already been killed so he would never break again then that's what he's going to do.

He did not despair over Choso's death, he despaired because it looked like he was alone and on the verge of defeat against Sukuna. His role was breaking just like his reason to live and I think that this mentality, his negative character arc, will find it's conclusion at the end of the Sukuna fight.

This fight is not the end of the manga, we still have the merger to deal with, there is still a big arc with smaller ones in between coming at us. But for Yuji something big has to happen, probably something pretty bad that has him crushed... at first.

At the end of it, he will finally deal with all his loss and his trauma in a good and healthy way and leave his life as a cog and being a human Mahito behind. Then he might finally shed the tears that were missing in chapter 259.

[mrinafria]

I'll gladly let you kill me then.

-That promise, make sure you keep it.

So I think Daon's backstory is significant for us to understand a bit more about Han Daon as a character. He's got this huge scar from his childhood incident that he never really healed from. Also, he's no saint. We've seen him wavering in what he should/should not do more than once so far.

He knows giving police protection to criminals is a waste but still does it because it's the lawful thing to do. He wavers for a couple of seconds there when Kang Bitna offers to kill his parents' killer for him because the law cannot. From what I see, he's always walked on a thin line between what is right or wrong according to society's definition. He definitely has a violent streak in him; he's just never had to fully give in to that.

You bet he'd have ended up on the dark side after his parents' death if not for his noona who never gave up on him, turned him away, with her love and kindness, from a path that could have led him to darkness and uncertainty. Now that Detective Soyeong is gone, the person who showed him light is gone too. His only family after he'd lost his own, gone. And he's back to being that kid again who had so much unresolved hurt, trauma and angst against the law that didn't believe in him (a wound he still carries). Law that wasn't enough to give him his well-deserved justice. Back then, he had Soyeong who was a human and law abiding individual. Now, he has Kang Bitna aka Justitia, a demon who serves justice in her own way because she knows the human law is faulty. If Han Daon was guided to life and light back then because of Soyeong, would he then give in to death and darkness now, because he is already spiraling as it is and there's no one to bring him back to light?

Why do I feel Kang Bitna actually wouldn't want that? It was different back when she'd stabbed him, but the switch is flipped now, and I think she'd care very much about Han Daon's future and fate. The way she goes 'HAN DAON!' and 'Then you'll end up in hell too' and stares at him like she doesn't recognize this version of Daon--I've replayed that scene far too many times.

Because Bitna may say Daon's morality and tenacity to get to the truth is annoying, but I think she doesn't even know that she appreciates it, which is also why she gets so worked up every time she feels like Daon's faked his emotions or betrayed her with his words: she expects him to be on the side of truth and righteousness.

Even though we see her supporting Daon in the precap for eps 9 and 10, she might go out of her way and even risk her own existence to keep Daon away from darkness later, because now if something happens to him, she'd be the first one to cry.

A part of me also thinks Daon cannot go ALL the way with his revenge because he'd made a promise to Detective Soyeong to always be a detective first and do his job. It's his vengeance talking right now but once that wears off and reason kicks in, I don't think he'd want to kill somebody unlawfully, disrespecting the promise he made to his noona.

Or we could totally have a switch up with Bitna becoming the superego and Daon, the id. It'll be interesting to see if Bitna starts shifting gradually toward the 'unevil' side while helping Daon, having his back and protecting him. She might have to take Daon's life after all (deal with the Demon and all), but at a time when it'll hurt her THE MOST doing so. Maybe the power of Kylum can come to their rescue then, reviving Daon? It also makes me think if the 'Other Thing' you need for Kylum to work its divine magic is unconditional love/sacrificial love, where Bitna would have to willingly give up her life to revive Daon?

*cough* ^I take no responsibility for what I just said above thank you very much T-T

[merwgue]

Let’s talk about the impossible feat of loving Nesta while simultaneously shipping Nessian. Yes, it’s possible to admire Nesta’s fierce, complex, and deeply troubled character, but it becomes a mental gymnastics routine when people insist on pairing her with Cassian, the very character who consistently undermines her healing and mental health.

There’s a fundamental issue here: Nesta is on a self-destructive spiral for the majority of her arc in A Court of Silver Flames, and Cassian, the supposed "love interest," isn’t helping—he’s actually worsening the situation. Cassian doesn’t just harm Nesta emotionally; he’s also not great for himself, which turns this into the classic case of two people who are absolutely not ready for a relationship but are shoved into one for the sake of drama, attraction, or—let’s face it—trauma-bonding. So let’s get into why loving Nesta means rejecting the idea of Nessian, because at its core, this relationship is toxic.

Cassian's Actions: Love or Harm?

In what world is it okay for a man to force a woman into an intervention-style imprisonment because she’s hurting? That’s not love; that’s coercion. The moment Rhysand, Feyre, and Cassian decide to lock Nesta up in the House of Wind without any real professional help is the moment you realize how warped their perception of "helping" is. Cassian actively participates in this isolation, and no matter how it’s spun, that’s not caring for someone’s well-being—that’s control. Realistically speaking, throwing someone with severe PTSD, depression, and a ton of guilt into a glorified prison doesn’t scream "let’s heal together"; it screams "I don’t want to deal with your pain, so I’ll just shove you into a corner."

The thing with Cassian is that he keeps asserting dominance over Nesta under the guise of tough love, which, at best, is misguided and, at worst, is abusive. There’s emotional manipulation here that people often overlook. He’s constantly undermining her boundaries, trying to force her into situations she’s clearly not ready for. This isn’t about "challenging her to be better"—this is about someone refusing to accept where she is in her emotional journey and trying to rush her into healing on his timeline.

Relationships Aren't a Band-Aid for Self-Destruction

You can’t ship someone who is in the throes of their own personal turmoil into a romantic relationship and expect everything to work out. It’s not the 90s where "love heals all wounds" was a plausible relationship arc. Let’s get real: both Cassian and Nesta are deeply flawed, emotionally scarred people who are not in a position to bring out the best in each other. Cassian has his own guilt, his own trauma, and his own unresolved issues, which means that he is self-destructing in his own way too. How is a relationship built on two crumbling foundations supposed to thrive?

There’s this common trope that "relationships make people better." And sure, sometimes that’s true. The right partnership can encourage personal growth, offer support, and provide a stable ground for emotional healing. But here’s the kicker: that only works if both parties are in a place to actively support one another. Cassian and Nesta are both drowning in their own emotional baggage, and what happens when two people are drowning? They pull each other down.

It’s Not the Right Time—Or Maybe It’s Just Not Right

Let’s entertain the idea for a moment that Cassian and Nesta could be meant to be. Maybe, in another universe, under different circumstances, their dynamic could work. But in this current context, it's not just that it's not the right time—it's that Cassian is fundamentally bad for Nesta's mental health. Relationships take effort, mutual respect, and understanding. What Cassian offers is a kind of pseudo-support that's wrapped up in his own unresolved issues. He’s often dismissive of Nesta’s pain, or worse, he actively exacerbates it by belittling her coping mechanisms (however flawed they may be).

Cassian pushes her physically and emotionally when she’s clearly not in a place to handle it. This isn’t the "right person, wrong time" situation—it’s the "this relationship is unhealthy for both people" situation. To claim they’re good for each other is to completely disregard the damage they do to one another.

Cassian's Behavior: Emotional Manipulation or Love?

Cassian fans often try to justify his actions by claiming he’s trying to help Nesta get out of her destructive cycle, but let’s be real here: a lot of what he does is emotional manipulation. Cassian constantly tries to mold Nesta into the person he thinks she should be, without giving her the space to figure out who she actually is. Yes, Nesta is angry, grieving, and hurting, but instead of letting her process that pain on her own terms, Cassian’s solution is to insert himself into her healing journey as if he’s the one with the answer to all her problems.

The power dynamics here are wildly skewed. Nesta is at her most vulnerable, and Cassian—who should recognize that and proceed with caution—does the exact opposite. He forces her into situations she’s not ready for, whether it’s physical training or emotionally confronting things she hasn’t yet processed. This kind of forced "healing" is toxic. It's not love; it's domination.

Abuse Isn’t Just Physical—It’s Mental and Emotional Too

It’s easy to point out physical abuse and say "that’s wrong," but what people fail to recognize is that emotional and mental abuse are just as damaging. Cassian’s emotional manipulation—his constant pushing, his refusal to respect Nesta’s boundaries, his belief that he knows what’s best for her—are all forms of emotional abuse. He might not physically hurt her, but the way he chips away at her mental and emotional health is just as harmful.

Nesta deserves a partner who supports her healing in a way that’s compassionate and understanding—not someone who forces her into situations she’s not ready for because he thinks it’s the best course of action. Cassian, for all his good intentions, isn’t that partner. At least, not now, and maybe not ever.

Conclusion: You Can’t Love Nesta and Ship Nessian

Here’s the bottom line: you can’t claim to love Nesta while simultaneously shipping her with a man who actively harms her, emotionally manipulates her, and refuses to respect her boundaries. If you love Nesta, you want her to heal, to thrive, to grow—on her own terms. Cassian, in his current state, doesn’t support that growth. In fact, he stunts it. So no, you can’t love Nesta and ship Nessian at the same time. To do so is to fundamentally misunderstand what it means to love someone like Nesta: fiercely, without conditions, and with a respect for her autonomy.

Cassian might be good for someone else, or maybe even for Nesta in a different life. But in this one? He’s not the hero of her story—he’s the obstacle.

[alexandraisyes]

What would happen if you were a writer for TSAMS?

I mean we'll never know unless we try, however-

God the temptation to make jokes about shipping ajfsdkg;ljfasd;l

In all seriousness I'm good at finding and fixing plot holes and writing consistent storylines. I've been writing solo for years, and recently I've been co-writing fics for this fandom. And stars I'll say it now, obviously I wouldn't drag fan ships into the canon lore, that would be stupid considering most of them just wouldn't work with canon.

If I had the chance to write for TSAMS I would definitely try to influence the way certain things (specifically things like mental disorders) are portrayed, because I understand being part of the audience and the frustration of only seeing part of the story and missing an entire important perspective. I personally find so much enjoyment in that because I get to tear everything apart, dissect it, and put it back together so the fandom can understand what the story is portraying, but the fact that someone is required to tear it apart to get what should have been an obvious message most of the time is an issue, in my opinion.

A consistent problem I've noticed with TSAMS is that it's overly omnipotent on some things while being too closed about others. This is a narrative problem that stems from not having enough time to figure out the best approach for new situations they want to incorporate. This is because the writers/VAs are so bogged down by personal projects, stream schedules, their servers, life, etc that they just don't have time to figure these things out. Especially when the company is pushing for more content/lore episodes and they're just a team of four. Four very very busy individuals that have to write AND voice act the entire cast of characters. I feel like having someone who is just a writer would help with a lot of the inconsistency and unresolved plot holes.

There's a lot of strong potential for things that would stem back as far as two years that would be so interesting to see incorporated, but they just don't have the time to work through those and it's easier to keep jumping on new boats and abandoning the ones they have to sink because of unresolved tears in the plot letting more inconsistencies trickle in like so much water. So I would absolutely work to correct those and clean up the holes and resolve unanswered questions.

I'd also push for more consistent characterization, or rather better worded, deeper characterization. Not that they don't have good characterization now, overall I think they do a decent job, but there are just some things that I wish they'd touch on more. Likes, dislikes, disorders, complications, relationships, etc. What really makes up these characters; I'd probably end up with a complicated character web for the main cast at the very least to help with consistent storytelling. I do this with my own AUs to keep characters consistent, including quirks (For example Solar Flare always refers to people by their full name in my writing). It would also be interesting to dig deeper into what makes the characters them. Their personalities, beliefs, interests, morality/standards (for those without morals), and what they did and didn't find traumatic (as well as what level of trauma).

God even just the thought of how I could potentially fix the dumpster fire (/affectionate /positive) of TSAMS and co is a little exciting because there's just so much potential lying around untampered with that I would happily dig my grubby little claws into.

[lurkingshan]

Love Sea Final Thoughts

I have been trying to wrap my head around my overall feelings about Love Sea, a show that is undeniably flawed but somehow charming anyway, that drops so many threads but does such a good job with a few of its core points that it's hard to be mad. I can't really say that this is a great drama, but I can say that I enjoyed it a lot and I think it's a good watch if you go in understanding some caveats.

Let's start with a few things I really loved about this show:

Mahasamut. A great character, he will be going on my shortlist of Thai bl favorites. He's smart, honest, patient, giving and forgiving but he also knows himself, his limits, and his worth. On top of all that, he actually looks like a normal person, with a healthy body weight and beautiful imperfect skin. So rare in dramas.

Smart class dynamics. I appreciated how much this show grounded Mut and Rak's relationship in their class disparity, how wealth and lack of same was a constant issue between them that was never forgotten, and how its effect on their power dynamic shifted over time as their relationship grew.

Very well-executed sex scenes. The sex in this show is tied to character development and relationship arcs, and every sex scene mattered to the story. We watched the shifting power dynamics between Mut and Rak play out via the sex they had together and by watching their intimacy we learned more about them.

Ridiculous chemistry. The main love story was supported by truly excellent emotional and sexual chemistry. I always believed in the attraction and the feelings between these two, and that helped a lot when the story didn't quite take me where it needed to.

Rak and Vie's friendship. I really loved that we spent time with these two as besties, and that they were genuinely so supportive of each other. Vie was a real MVP in kicking Rak's ass when he needed it.

Meena, the best child ever. What a delightful character who brought a lot of fun and lightness to the story. Her scenes with Mut were a true highlight.

And here are some things that didn't quite work for me:

Uneven focus for the main characters. Once we left the island to go to Bangkok, the entire show was about Rak, his backstory, his issues, his ongoing problems, and his needs, and Mut was kind of subsumed in his story instead of having one of his own. I was glad we got back to Mut's life at the end, but they really should have kept it present throughout so everything didn't feel so one-sided.

Shallow engagement with family trauma. And despite the fact that the story was so much about Rak's issues, the story never actually went deep on them. I still don't really understand a lot about his family dynamics. The show used his dad and cousin as villains and then his mom as an easy out to solve everything at the end, but we never dug into how all these people ended up this way in the first place. It was a real missed opportunity.

Rak's emotional journey. I was on board for much of it, but other parts felt a bit haphazard and all over the place. Sometimes it felt like he was suddenly progressing out of nowhere, and others it felt like he was backsliding just because the plot demanded it. I liked where the story took him a lot but the path to get there was pretty bumpy.

The side couple. WOOF. I have no idea what happened here, but that was a fail on just about every front. Mook was a hard character to love from the start, Vie felt like a completely different person with Mook than in all her other scenes, there was so much lying and manipulation for no good reason, and in the end they were left completely unresolved. If you are on the lookout for great gl pairings, you will not find that here.

So there you have it. This show is absolutely a mixed bag on its execution, so how much you end up liking it will probably depend on how strongly you connect with what it did well and where it dropped the ball. For me, it was a good experience and one I'll remember fondly. I'll definitely be watching the special when it's released and I hope to see this cast again.

[cnihachu]

niki and quackity both are characters who have felt extremely powerless and unseen. they have nothing, or their lives are controlled by outside sources- they are shells and pawns unwillingly used and mistreated in a game much larger than them. in manberg niki sees through quackity, and quackity sees through her. they both want escape and to feel stability again; but they don’t get that. it only gets worse until it all collapses in and they have a first row seat to see it, feeling alone and isolated.

quackity copes with this by building. he tries to claim back power in any way he can- resigning from the cabinet and eventually returning with a plan of betrayal, taking office after schlatt dies, attempting to break the laws of nature and death just in the name of taking political power. when things go wrong he turns to the rubble and tries to build it up how he thinks is best. He moves on, he starts over, time and time again. He doesn’t slow down to process. he doesn’t give himself time to think over what has happened to him. he craves and searchs for power and eventually builds up his own empire.

niki also copes with this by building. she isolates and tasks herself with building a place for people to be safe- something she never got to have, and something she wanted to provide for others. it’s a distraction, an attempt to do good while she avoids what’s happened to and arround her. the isolation takes its toll and backfires, her own mental struggle and the weight of what she’s witnessed settles on her. niki resolves herself to not knowing why she continues to live. she builds her own tomb, a city once made to shelter one that now constricts her slowly. niki festers in her feelings, in opposite to quackitys running from them. she’s an open wound that she doesn’t let heal over, she feels her loneliness, she feels her rage, she feels the despair. she sinks her feet in and builds the world around her to be as bleak and isolated as she feels.

they both shelter from their past. they isolate and shut others out, especially those they love. they lash out and hurt those they love as a result of their own closed off emotional state and unresolved trauma.. but they start to heal in the same way, too. they open up and let others in. they share the burden they’ve carried solely on their shoulders with someone else and after so long they let themselves take a step back and breathe.

they both get an ending that isn’t hopeless. they get a chance to be happy.

idk. something to think about. i’m insane

[l-in-the-light]

Facing your own abyss in Silent Hill 2

Every save point is a red square. Looking at it is painful it's like... someone's... groping around my skull. Every hole James jumps into...

...is a square. The tv at the big reveal is an old crt one with a square screen.

Even the bathroom's mirror at the very beginning of the game is a square. Who cares about a bathroom's mirror, right? But the whole game starts with James staring at himself, into that mirror. He's staring at himself. Staring into the abyss. His mind is his own abyss. We've been looking at it the whole time, from the very start of the game.

"He who is not bold enough to be stared at from across the abyss is not bold enough to stare into himself. The truth can only be learned by marching forward."

James starts the game by staring at himself. He's not afraid of death. He thinks he wants to find out the truth, because things don't make sense to him, he can't understand anything, but he feels something is wrong.

But at the last save point, James looks away from the abyss. He was not ready to find out everything. He doesn't want to look into himself even deeper. He's afraid of what he can find. Please stop staring at me, I don't want for you to look into myself. I don't want to see any more.

A hot take: there's nothing wrong with that. Sometimes it might be better not to stare too long. Heck, it takes so much courage to do that. Many, many people would rather continue their lives by holding false ideas about oneself, choosing safety over feeling uncomfortable. It's a very human thing to do. Just sometimes you don't get that choice and you can't live normally unless you not only stare back, but also jump right into that abyss. It will be terrifying, you might find things you wish you never knew, you might find out nothing of what happened to you was ever your fault, but it won't make you feel any better anyway. It's when you're at your limit that you're literally forced to face it, when you buried what made you uncomfortable so deep that you feel overwhelmed and numbed, and you don't even understand why - because you hid the reasons. Or you can just run away. Some would prefer death over the truth.

This can happen because of our mental health crashing down. Unresolved traumas, feelings, belittling our own pain, trying to fit a circle into a square hole, unbelonging.

Ultimately, it doesn't even matter what is James' personal struggle, because anyone can relate to this in some ways. You can't escape abyss for forever, we've all been there and we all will be jumping into abyss again, and again.

But this has to be said, I'm sorry not sorry:

Sometimes you will get lost in your abyss to the point you will project your own issues on other people. It's a way to make you feel more secure, safe, when you tripped over some uncomfortable truth. Because you normalize it and it can't be overwhelming anymore if everyone can relate to it, in other words: you try to belittle the problem so that the "uncomfortable feeling" goes away. It becomes normal, familiar, tamed, nothing to be afraid of as the result. But is it really fair towards the people you did the projecting on? You're not helping them or respecting them if you just throw your own issues at them like that. And this applies to Silent Hill fandom as a whole, actually, because:

Every Silent Hill game (even the bad ones, even freaking Ascension) and movie: *shows clearly that the story is about PTSD, characters suffer from symptoms and hallucinations, are triggered by sounds, suffer from victim blaming etc.*

Every second fan on reddit: James is just sexually frustrated, he doesn't have any trauma, and even if he has one it doesn't matter, what are you talking about?! You're reaching! Everything is horny and sexy in this game, my interpretation is CANON! The town is evil and it punishes James and Eddie because they're bad people! Angela did a bad thing but didn't deserve it btw.

This is mostly me venting a bit, feel free to dislike it, but I need to get it off somewhere and I decided: tumblr it is.

Like, literally, all Silent Hill series entries share a theme of PTSD, but some people will go to extreme lengths to deny it and call it "reaching" WHILE saying "sexual frustration is canon". Alessa suffers from PTSD in SH1, James, Eddie and Angela suffer from it in SH2, freaking Heather, Claudia and even Douglas suffers from it in SH3, Henry and Walter in Silent Hill 4, Travis in Origins, Alessa in the movie, Heather in the movie, Cheryl in Shattered Memories (she's even in a therapy, come on, get a clue!), Alex in Homecoming, Murphy in Downpour etc. etc. etc. They all went through a trauma, Silent Hill reflects their traumatic experiences (that they don't want to remember!), they have to face their triggers putting them through the traumatic event again and again, and then delusions attemping to lull the mind into a fake sense of comfort. Their monsters are the delusions, not their horny desires!

Btw if you see your monsters as horny creatures, then maybe you're understanding it all wrong. It's supposed to be a delusion or fear, if you're horny and just want to hump things and that's why everything you see is sexy, then it's definiely not something you actually fear, and if it is, then I think you have bigger issues to deal with than sexual frustration here.

That being said, the creature monster designer, Masahiro Ito, called those monsters "delusions". Delusion is something that isn't an accurate representation of a concept in your mind. Delusion is far removed from reality. You want to believe a lie, because you can't handle the truth.

Now, if monsters are showing your sexual frustration that you don't want to admit you have, then they should be dressed like nuns instead. You want to deceive your mind, you want to believe you're not *that* horny and are faithful to your one and only, you can't handle the possibility that you're thinking of having an affair on the side.

Let's unpack this monster (Abstract Daddy/Ideal Father), having all of the above in mind:

It's a surreal creature consisting of two people, it has two heads and two mouths. And it's not literally showing intercourse like so many in "sexual frustration is canon" camp are claiming. Because that would be *a literal representation*, not a delusion. You would literally be seeing what happened, forcing you to face it in it's full horror and that can't make you believe in a lie (remember, the idea is that: you can't handle the truth, your mind is creating a delusion to calm you down). It's a self-defense mechanism fighting back against the trauma. You need to get rid of that delusion so you can face what actually happened!

There's one more description of Abstract Daddy in Japanese that is never truly translated into english. It's おぶさったとおちゃん (obusatta tōchan), loosely it means something like "piggyback daddy"; a dad carrying a child on their shoulders/back. Now look at the creature again. It looks like a smaller person is clinging to a bigger one, if you consider that the whole frame belongs to the person on the bottom and is "their body". Perhaps the door/bedframe person is carrying the smaller one on top of itself, but since the child is heavy/older now the frame ends up bending towards the ground. It's an image of a dad carrying his child.

Kinda like this (Inu Yasha is here just to illustrate the concept). That's why the limbs are hanging loosely like that on the monster's design.

Wait a moment, but why is the frame so big under the top person? It doesn't look like part of a body at all. That's because of the subjective perspective. When you're a small child, your dad looks especially big to you. When you cling to his back, you feel like it's so broad, strong and big; so big your hands won't meet when you embrace him. And most importantly, makes you feel safe and secure, because a father should protect his child. I could swear I even read lines like that in mangas or heard them in movies before, because that's definitely not my own impression there I thought up on my very own.

In order to see the truth that your parent was an abuser, you need to get rid of that "safe and secure" feeling of delusion you're experiencing. The monster is wrapped in cloth btw to obscure the truth, what you see on the surface is incorrect, the truth is trapped underneath (and if you want to, then NOW is the moment to jump to your intercourse thoughts or draw a parallel to Mary on sickbed. Let's call it an extra layer to this monster). Literally uncovering it would be the very definition of a horror.

Extra thought: the monster attacks James like it wants to protect Angela from the possible stranger (what an Ideal Father should do, indeed). Makes the whole scene afterwards have a lot more sense too, with Angela calling James a disgusting pig who is also only after "one thing". She considered James a threat, but it wasn't a conscious fear until the defeat of the monster. Next time they will meet, Angela starts to mistake James as her mom instead, so the whole paranoid delusion of James being a threat (because he's a male and males became her PTSD trigger) got dissolved and it's the result of Abstract Daddy's defeat. Angela now knows who was the real threat.

Finally, after 10+ years I solved the mystery of Abstract Daddy. You're welcome if you enjoyed the ride. I don't even like this monster's design all that much (I find Mandarins way cooler). But this isn't the end. If Abstract Daddy is a delusion, it means all the other monsters are also delusions and HIDE the truth, not "expose" or "manifest" it in straightforward manner. Only getting rid of them by unwrapping the actual thing underneath will lead you towards truth, believing the surface level will leave you delusional. There's still a lot to unwrap about the 9 delusions of James.

Yes, Abstract Daddy is how the monster looks like for James. We never knew how it looked like for Angela. Just the name alone suggests James has some trauma related to his father as well, which is a link that connects James to Angela.

And you know what, it's fine if you thought all this time that James is just sexually frustrated. I don't know how you can explain to yourself the fact that he needs to fight the sexy creatures instead of being overjoyed he can "'get some" finally. I thought that's how touch starvation works? But even if you somehow projected your own fears onto James it's alright. You just caught a glimpse of your own abyss and maybe you're not yet ready to stare back at it. We all keep doing those mistakes. It's just human.

Yes, of course me too. Why else do you think it took me 10+ years to solve this mystery? And it's only a start of it, we barely made it under the surface of this iceberg. But I feel like most Silent Hill fans aren't even remotely interested in any interpretation that opposes "sexual frustration" angle, especially now after Masahiro Ito denied that's it's not a canon interpretation, yeeting it back to "headcanon" category where it always belonged.

Yes, sexual themes are there in the game to make you uncomfortable, but if you know the sources of inspiration (Jung), then you know the uncomfortable levels get much deeper than your post-pandemic touch starvation. Maybe you're not ready or not interested to go that far and it's alright. I'm actually not so sure I'm ready to face the deepest depths of James's abyss myself. It both fascinates and terrifies me. We might have to go full Lynch on Silent Hill 2 and realize that nothing is what it actually seems.

Link to my previous interpretation essay on Silent Hill 2, in case anyone is interested (it's about merging of Otherworlds): https://www.tumblr.com/l-in-the-light/765829615005597696.

[dropoutconfessions]

This is a SUPER spoilery confession so here is your warning to scroll if you want to avoid nsbu, neverafter, acoc, and trw spoilers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So I don’t know if this is the case with all of Brennan's campaigns since I've only seen and finished the forementioned ones, but one thing I've really disliked about all of them are the endings. Not like the final episodes, but the last ten minutes or so, where everything is wrapped up in a neat little bow. Which is what I don’t like.

Brennan has a trend of making the endings really sweet and sugary. I know it’s comedic, but c'mon, the characters get their happy ending immideatley.

For acoc and neverafter, which are the darkest and grittiest Brennan-led campaigns so far, the cartoonishly happy endings feel especially jarring. He and his players like to explore deep and complex themes and conflicts with his players during the game, but as soon as we hit the epilouge they speedrun the last remaining chunks of character development and everyone lives happily ever after, very literally. It’s a little bit easier to buy with nsbu since the whole campaign is a crackshow but the pattern continues nonetheless.

Which. I get that that’s the point. They’re comedians at the end of the day, and they can wrap up their stories how they want. But... would it hurt to have just a liiittle bit of bitter with the sweet? Like, does everything have to wrap up neatly? Brennan goes out of his way to make sure everything is absolutley prefect in the end, which is probably really nice for the players, but imo flattens the story to the ground.

I think acoc is the worst offender, for a couple of different reasons, one being the amounts of unresolved trauma that was within the group at the end. Just a line like "it takes time and a lot of trial and error, but the Rocks does stay together as a family and get a little better at loving eachother each day" would have gone such a long way instead of: yup everything is fixed and they’re all happy now. Also revivification is suddenly possible, tf is that about. And also! The campaign started after a "happy ending" and showed how everything didn’t automatically fix itself after the war was won. Why stop there? Why not carry that over a little bit to the end?

Ok this became a bit more of a rant post than I intended. The endings don’t have to be tragic, I just think it’s good to leave a story on the '...', whether it will continue or not.

And, personally, i do like a little tragedy. Shoutout to The Ravening War

As a fellow tragedy girlie, I completely get that, fucked up ending me beloved. I do think D20 has a couple things blocking it from doing it right every season

Seasons with heavy themes of tragedy are emotionally tough on the cast. By the end of Neverafter and A Crown of Candy (especially ACOC), the whole cast was fucking tired and stressed out of their minds. In Adventuring Parties for ACOC, Lou straight up admitted that he picked up smoking cause of that season, and Siobhan and Emily were in tears on camera. By the end of it, it's likely that's all they wanted.

The themes of Neverafter lent themselves to a non-tragic ending given the pcs won. The whole culmination of the story was the pcs getting free will, which means their victory meant they all got their wish. They literally gave everyone the ability to give themselves a better story, it's hard to make that tragic without cheapening their victory.

And the same goes for A Crown of Candy. The campaign ended with Liam basically casting Wish. Generally, a DM does Wish fuckery when there's more campaign, if you're pulling that shit where it goes wrong at the end of a campaign during the wrap up when you have no plans for a sequel? You're an asshole.

And speaking of sequels, tragic endings make people smell sequels in the water. If a campaign's epilogue has a bit of tragedy in it, it typically lights the fandom up for a sequel. And it definitely happens with d20 shows, given how much speculation there is for a Fantasy High Senior Year. Generally (probably to avoid rabid fandom) they avoid sequel bait, especially with A Crown of Candy. Ravening War is immune to a lot of these factors given it's a shorter season so there's less emotional wear and tear, the story was designed to possibly end poorly, it's a prequel so sequel bait isn't an issue, and the players honestly remained pretty fucking powerless on a world scale the whole time because they were never supposed to deal with the largest problems of the world.

But yeah no, in general, I'm not super big on the epilogues either, the last one Intrepid Heroes one that I really liked was like, Starstruck or Unsleeping City II.

[littlerosetrove]

I'm sleepy as I type this out, but with one episode to go, um. I'm truly at a loss for what the point of Marisol was. I'm so serious.

There's one episode left and the only thing that should and can happen is Eddie breaking up with Marisol. Doesn't really matter if it's mutual, or if Marisol beats Eddie to it and breaks up with him first. It doesn't matter. Because the only "purpose" Marisol has served this entire season is to, apparently, be a babysitter to Chris offscreen, set off some kind of catholic guilt storyline for Eddie, which? Has that even been touched on again? Right now Eddie is just reckoning with unresolved trauma about Shannon. And the third thing Marisol has done is to I'd say passively be cheated on (like, Marisol is passive in all this if that makes sense). There's zero weight to her being cheated on because she's not a character, and we the audience do not care about Eddie and Marisol as a couple.

Like?????????????

Idk y'all. I mean I've seen some small bits of meta that both Marisol and Kim are examples of how they never held weight to/for Eddie. Like that's The Point. It was handled weirdly and not well, but it was to show how Eddie is 1) comparing these women to an idealized and fantastical version of Shannon, and thus they'll never match up, but still he persisted to try to recapture his and Shannon's "magic." And 2) Eddie was, honestly, trying to fit these women into roles, mold them almost into this skewed idea he has of what a relationship between a man and woman should look like.

And sure there's some merit to that, but idk. If the show wanted to showcase that Eddie is still stuck on Shannon, that he's stuck on an idealized version of Shannon and their relationship that didn't exist, then they could have gone a different route. Because as is, right now, we're still left with Marisol who, frankly, served no purpose. Not really. And we have soap opera levels of nonsense with doppelgängers that doesn't feel grounded in the reality that 911 often has (at least when it comes to the core 118 and their human stories).

And sure, all this stuff with Marisol and Kim is in my eyes further proof that Eddie is a very repressed gay man, but again. Find a different way to tell these important things.

I don't even care about Marisol (certainly not the actress), but this all goes into my dislike of how this season has overall handled Eddie as a character and his stories. To me, right now, a lot of it just comes across disrespectful to Eddie. They had a good start in episode one (though the focus was mostly on Chris...), but it quickly went downhill in my eyes.