#this is way longer than I intended lmao

[bubble-popping]

👀👀 dnb stockholm syndrome au?

i would love to hear anything else you have (/nf. you you don't want to answer its ok)

all ur other aus r rly cool too!

Okay, first, thank you! I'm glad u enjoy my thoughts on the silly lil guys :) I'm just somewhat embarrassed/scared to share is all but if ppl wanna hear then I'll talk abt it :D

I'm gonna put it under the cut for anyone that isn't comfortable with all the stuff a stockholm syndrome au would entail :)

The main concept is that c!Techno is known for being like the richest guy on the server. He's more distant in this au, not really that welcoming to people and only truly cares about c!Phil. He's also somewhat of a hoarder of valuable items, but he's kinda grown bored of looking at the same things all the time. He wonders what could truly make him the richest man with the most resources.

Then, he hears that c!Dream's been imprisoned, and, even more interestingly, can revive people. He doesn't rly believe it for a while, until c!Tommy is resurrected. Now, he's very interested seeing as he and Phil only have one life each. But he has to wait for the right opportunity, he can't seem too eager.

So, he waits. While he waits, he creates a secret hidden base underground far from the rest of the smp where his next 'trophy' will stay. The day arrives where he receives the letter, the day he visits Dream and finds, well... something he didn't expect. He's imprisoned as well, he fully expected this. But he didn't expect how Dream seemed to care about him so much, how frantic he became at the thought that his only way out was now trapped with him, how small he looked when he curled into a ball nonsensically rambling and spiraling into paranoia.

Techno also didn't expect the strange feelings that grow as he lives in that little box with the man. Dream initially flinches whenever Techno sits too close to him, but eventually he relaxes, until soon it's clear he craves the physical contact and makes any excuse to touch and get touched.

When Phil finally pops the ender pearl stasis chamber, Techno begins working on plans to break him out immediately.

Once he does, he convinces Dream to stay with him, that nowhere else is safe and Sam and Quackity will find him if he leaves. In fact, he's banking on it, so he'll have the perfect excuse to take Dream to the secret base. It works out exactly as he hopes, only a few days pass before the two are at his door and Dream has a panic attack just at the sight of them. He has a full blown panic attack, clinging to Techno and begging him to not reveal his location. And Techno thinks how this was all too easy.

Of course Techno doesn't say anything to them, and makes sure they know better than to try and force their way in. After they leave, Techno waits until night fall to transport Dream to his 'trophy room'. Dream's hesitant about the cramped space, but he trusts Techno, so he stays. From there, Techno teaches him to listen to everything he says :)

[the-shifting-long]

like tying back to fandom misogyny (i know i know i've been on it for a while i'm sorry) not only is so much of the language around the hatred for Tower/the Shifting Mound misogynistic and, when people aren't straight up calling them bitches or saying they'd be more attractive if [x] or treating them like Objects, Prizes, Romantic Interests and saying they're Bad Princesses and the Worst Romance and the worst wife/prize compared to other princesses like the precious wecious Thorn and HEA and Damsel or whatever

they're mad at Tower/Shifty for a lot of the Exact Same Reasons they love Voices.

like the Opportunist abuses his power every time he has is, actively lies to others (though he isn't very good at it.) He is #1 Princess Stabber/Killer/Slayer. when he doesn't want to kill her, it's because he's getting something out of her. but he's a Male Character whose trauma is #valid unlike Tower who also likes to abuse her power to get something from the player and who was (checks notes) locked in a basement and then attacked with a knife by the first person she met.

Cold is another big proponent of "what if we stabbed her/killed her." and constantly shows up when you commit acts of horrible cruelty to the princess but he's a Male Character and him wanting to exorcise the Spectre was sexy and not like, a horrifying moment where she freaked out and wanted nothing more than to get away from him. him being unempathetic and generally uncaring/numb is a Fun Character Trait unlike the literal goddess of death Shifty. cold is great but the woman he's so similar to and who is, in many ways, kinder than he is? yeah she's rude and arrogant we hate her.

Contrarian is often so cruel to the Princess, doesn't really give a shit about her, is there for a laugh, and only regrets what he's done after he's gone way too far (Advy-Fury, Stranger...) and "too far" often means Literally Killing Her For a Laugh or multiplying her until the world itself collapses and she's a frankenstein of half-dead half-alive beings. so it's no surprise he considers himself "the worst part of us" but also he's FUNNY he throws the KNIFE OUT THE WINDOW he's a great character unlike Tower or Fury or Nightmare who toy with us the player! They're so fucking mean and unjustified and go way too far! Their buried pain is nothing while Contra's is valid <3

And then Stubborn! In the majority of chapters he appears in, he wants nothing more than to kill/fight the princess. Wild and Advy are the only exceptions...and Advy isn't an exception at all, just the only circumstance where the Princess actively wants an equal challenger and isn't permanently hurt by the fights the two get into. She's the only princess he cares about, and she's just like him. But yeah no Tower's selfish and the Shifting Mound wanting to fight us forever sucks and is rude but Stubborn? he's a badass he's awesome <3

i'm not going to get into All of the Voices because some of them are less inclined to violence than others, and lash out in different or more understandable ways, but so many of the voices above are fan favorites and they do just...horrible things to the Princess (by supporting a player who chooses to do the horrible things those Voices want to do, of course, and sometimes by acting on their own!)

and to be clear. I DO LIKE THE VOICES. but part of why i like them is BECAUSE they suck! they act in horrible ways that mirror the player's actions, the princess' actions, and when the bar is on the ground they'll help the player dig! it's fascinating!

but i also really like the princess-i like them way more than the voices-and think it's so blatantly hypocritical to hate on said Princesses for doing a lot of the same shit the Voices do for what are honestly much more understandable reasons. the voices are on a path in the woods and get a cool knife. the princess is locked in the basement of a cabin with no way out. these situations are not the same.

[aloonaram]

Got inspired to write for ORV so here’s a snippet of a fic im working on that kinda works on its own :)

Change is Not an Instance

(Spoilers for the Dark Castle arc ahead)

The first time the innocuous thought made its way into his mind, he was too busy using the last of his strength to shove his sword into Kim Dokja’s stomach to give it any time to process.

He’s beautiful.

It wasn’t an unusual line of thought. He’d always believed Kim Dokja to be attractive—long lashes, silken hair, slim waist—but there wasn’t anything more to it other than an appreciation of aesthetics. He’d found it strange when the other incarnations of Seoul had given him the title “Ugliest King,” but he figured it must’ve come down to preference or jealousy.

It was, however, the first time he meant it beyond just physical features.

Wings sprouted from Kim Dokja’s back, torn from the party members attempts to keep him grounded. Horns curved alongside his head, just as red as the blood dripping down his sword. Black veins crawled up his neck, framing his face and highlighting the strange red glow within his eyes. But what truly stood out—what forced that little innocuous thought to pierce his mind—was Kim Dokja’s smile. It was small and wrinkled from pain at the edges; blood coated his lips like a hellish gloss. But beyond it all, it was satisfied. As if his death were a job well done. It didn’t reach his eyes, clouded by pain and blood dripping from his lashes, but it did reach Yoo Joonghyuk. Its grip was as soft as the smile but as strong as its owners will to sacrifice anything and everything for the sake of the company.

A part of him—no, a majority of him—was furious with Kim Dokja. He’d had it all planned; was ready to regress knowing Kim Dokja could lead their companions to the end. But he should’ve known that fool would have something up his sleeve, he’d always been strangely adamant about keeping Yoo Joonghyuk alive in this turn. In doing so, he’d left his friends and his newfound incarnation behind with only the fragile promise that he’d somehow come back.

And yet, as an end more final than death pulled Kim Dokja apart at the seams, he looked to Yoo Joonghyuk and offered that satisfied smile.

“Let’s meet again, Yoo Joonghyuk.”

Despite its connotations, the statement felt final, a conclusion to the uniquely singular story that was Kim Dokja. In that, he’d felt a sense of understanding so deep and so piercing, he’d almost forgotten the rest of the company’s presence.

To regress meant to have hope even in the face of finality—and as a regressor, he’d come accustomed to this relationship between hope and hopelessness. They were the supposed angel and demon upon his shoulders as he awoke in his next turn, louder than even the noisiest of constellations.

He realized then, as Kim Dokja’s very being was stripped from arms, piece by piece—line by line—that Kim Dokja had wanted to stay, he wanted to come back. Despite being faced with the constellations’ wrath, Kim Dokja had hope in the face of hopelessness. And that was more beautiful than any physical feature he could imagine.

Kim Dokja told him once to stay; to continue this life despite his perceived failures because life had no value when death became constant and meaningless.

I want to tell him to stay. That if I must continue this turn to preserve the value of life then he must preserve the value of his life by staying.

[stevenrogered]

ONE DAY ↳book > screen

Imagine one selected day struck out of your life and think how different its course would have been. Think for a moment of the long chain of iron or gold, of thorns or flowers, that would never have bound you, but for the formation of the first link on that memorable day. - Charles Dickens, Great Expectations

[skyheld]

i think i figured out what it is about veilguard thedas that makes it feel so dead and not thedas to me and it's just. everyone excepts members of the factions or the veilguard are just passive onlookers to everything that goes on?

in inquisition we had all the members joining the inquisition for various reasons, then we had the weird cult in the hinterlands and the one on the storm coast, we had two groups of freemen and fairbank's refugees, we had all the orlesian nobles, and all of them had different ways of coping with/benefiting from/trying to actually stop whatever conflict they were concerned with. in origins we have several major conflicts plus the main one, and almost every single one of those had more than just the two main opposing sides. there wasn't just harrowmont supporters and bhelen supporters, there was the carta and the legion of the dead and the people who didn't care about the conflict at all. some of them you could just talk to, but you could talk to them in-depth, and then there were quests tied to a lot of others because they were actively doing things. in dragon age II it's pretty much in the structure of the game itself, in that sidequests introduces you to all the different ways people are acting on/reacting to a certain conflict, and then there's some cataclysmic event tying it all together.

in veilguard we have ambient dialogue and maybe some codex entries and that's kind of it? no one but the crows are fighting the antaam, or working with the antaam, or doing anything that isn't about the antaam. there are only veiljumpers in arlathan forest. we barely have any named npcs who aren't tied to a faction, enemy or ally. there's rana, there's the tal-vashoth on the rivaini coast. and i think there's one named dwarf in kal-sharok? who's mostly there for exposition. and there's nothing about any other place except the inqusitor's messages about the south. nothing about magisters from other tevinter cities swooping in to "help" but really to cease more power in minrathous. no rich antivan merchants hiring private armies because the crows can't deal with the antaam. the only places that exist are the ones we get to visit and even there, the npcs aren't people, they're barely plot devices. they're set-dressing.

i think it's very telling that i've seen people talk about how their rooks would handle fame after the final battle, and others talking about how no one even knows who rook is after, because we don't get any indication either way. so little time is given to the larger context of where this all takes place, the main conflict is pretty much entirely removed from the rest of the world except when it's destroying a city. it just feels like you're operating in a vaccum tbh.

[mushroompollution]

Absolution

On the other side of that door, they find themselves in the middle of a harrowing sight. Bodies all around. Screaming. Roaring flames. Air choked with smoke and ash. A hallway painted red with blood.

The Tragedy of Sablier.

Oz has seen this so many times now. But those were illusions, dreams, and memories.

This is different.

This is real.

Gilbert explains that though they really are in the past, they can't interact with anything there, or be seen by any of the poor victims. They make their way through the bloodied halls, trying their best not to think too much about the scene around them.

After all, there's nothing they can do for those people.

They just need to find Glen.

The jingle of a bell makes Oz gasp. Elliot is the only one who doesn't recognize that tell-tale sound of the Cheshire Cat. Oz breaks into a sprint, following that jingle, and the others follow.

They race through a doorway, and the sight causes a collective gasp as the group watches from a balcony. Below, Vincent seems somewhere far away, crying to himself as his Chain, Demios the Executioner, rampages above him.

They all watch in horror as Glen dodges attack after attack from her spiny blades, racing forward to drive that black-bladed sword straight through Vincent's chest.

Gilbert screams for his brother, but it's Oz who goes leaping from that balcony first, with Elliot right behind. Oz swings his scythe at Glen, and though he's easily countered, he buys some time for Vincent's brothers to rush to his side.

But as Gilbert puts a hand on his shoulder, Vincent shoves him away violently. He scrambles frantically to his feet, and away from the two trying to help.

"Don't touch me!!" he gasps. "Enough... I've had enough! Please!! I don't want to do this anymore!!"

"Vincent, calm down!!" Elliot cries.

"What's wrong with you?!" Gilbert begs. He sees a flash of light in the corner of his eye and shoves Elliot backwards as he leaps to tackle Vincent out of the way of a blast from Jabberwock as Glen and Oz's fight continues behind them.

Vincent reaches a hand out toward their fight, begging and pleading and crying for his Master to erase him.

As he cries, Gilbert looks down at his brother in shock.

Erase him...?

"Is that. What you've been trying to do all along?" Gilbert asks, grabbing his brother by the arm.

"Yes!!" Vincent wails. His voice sounds so desperate, hollow and empty. "That's the only way. If I hadn't opened that gate-- If I never existed-- Then Gil, you--"

"Don't be stupid!!" Gil shouts. "I thought I made it clear! If you alter the past, and erase the existence of my little brother, then I wouldn't be the big brother who protected you anymore!!"

But Vincent pulls away from him, scrambling to his feet again. "Shut up--!!"

"Maybe some other version of me would be happy, but that wouldn't be ME!! Just someone else who looks like me, but is that really what you want?! To protect a complete stranger?!"

But Gilbert is knocked back as Demios slashes the ground at his feet.

On the other side of the chamber, Glen sends Oz flying into a wall, where he sinks down, dazed.

"It's no use," Glen spits at the others as he approaches Oz. "Vincent has given up. No matter how many pretty words of encouragement you throw, to him, they're nothing but blades of rejection."

Gilbert gasps as he watches Glen approach the fallen Oz. He calls out for him, but there's no way he can get to his side in time.

But as Glen draws back his sword to end things, Alice throws herself between them.

Glen's starry eyes go wide. In that moment, it isn't Alice he sees standing there, but her mother. His sister.

Lacie.

He manages to stop his attack at the last second as Alice stares him down, unflinching. She orders him to lower his sword, but Glen can't move.

Seeing Alice in danger, the Cheshire Cat seems to appear from nowhere. He leaps high into the sky, which pulls Glen back to reality. He swings his blade at the Cat, but Cheshire easily avoids the blow. He dashes in, sweeping Alice off her feet, then retreats with her in his arms, though she kicks and yells for Oz.

Mostly recovered from the attack that had knocked the wind from him, Oz tries to run after them, only for Jabberwock to suddenly fill the air before him.

Glen can't waste time here anymore.

Gilbert throws himself at Vincent to protect him from the firey blast that fills the chamber. Elliot manages to jump into an adjacent room at the last second.

But as the smoke clears, Gilbert is horrified to watch Oz collapse. Panicked, he runs from Vincent's side, leaving his brother lying in a heap on the ground.

Of course.

All those nice words he had hurled at Vincent had meant nothing. In the end, he would always leave his brother's side for Oz, wouldn't he?

Vincent doesn't bother trying to get up. Maybe if he just lies there, they'll forget about him. Leave him there, to disappear into the past.

The sound of footsteps prove it won't be that easy. He opens his eyes, looking up to see Noise standing over him...

The sound of a gunshot rings out through the chamber. Blood bursts from Vincent's thigh.

Gilbert calls out for his brother, horrified to see Noise pointing a handgun at Vincent. But Demios appears before him and Oz, blocking his brother from his sight.

He can hear Vincent begging her to kill him. He sees Noise seeming to struggle, sees her left hand grabbing her right. She seems at war with herself, two souls fighting inside her as Vincent begs and begs to die.

"SHUT THE HELL UP!!!" Elliot's shout draws everyone's attention.

Despite all his ranting and raving about self-sacrifice, he runs straight at his brother, ignoring the rampaging Executioner. One blow from the Chain sends both him and Noise flying, but Elliot gets right back up. He wipes the blood from his chin, and steeles his blue eyes.

Vincent begs him to stop, but he refuses, marching through the flurry of Demios' uncontrollable rampage. As he draws closer, those blades slice through the air right at his throat.

He doesn't flinch.

At the last second, the echo of a promise brings the deadly attack to a halt.

"I know you killed my father! I know you killed Fred, and our uncle!" Elliot announces. Vincent stares up at him from the floor, wide-eyed. "But I killed Claude, and Ernest. And my own mother. We both have our reasons, and we could argue about them all day! But!! I've forgiven myself. I would be a goddamn hypocrite to not offer you a second chance too!!"

"Th-that's different--!! You were--"

"SHUT UP!!" Elliot roars. "It doesn't matter if I was controlled by Humpty Dumpty or not!! She's still gone because of me! And she was a SAINT!! Leo told me why you killed my father!! He told me about all the disgusting things that man had his hands in!!! He told me that YOU saved his life. My life. Gilbert's life!!!

Wasn't it YOU who told me to judge the world through my own eyes?!! Well I've seen what you've done, and who you are!!! And I've decided!!!! I can't forgive myself for what I did to our family until I've forgiven you too. You don't even have to apologize, because I've already made up my mind. I forgive you!!!!!"

Elliot drops to his knees before his panicked brother. He grabs Vincent by the collar, forcing him to look him in the eye. To see the sincerity in those blue skies.

Forgiveness?

Vincent had never wanted forgiveness. He had always thought the things he'd done could never warrant such a thought.

"You keep saying you have no future, and that's bullshit. You can ALWAYS start over!! If you really don't think our world can forgive you, then Leo and I can help you find another. There's an entire multiverse that's never heard the name Vincent Nightray before. And if you want to come home, then I know Leo would be happy to have you by his side.

So Vince, PLEASE!!!! Don't give up on me. Don't leave us like this. I've lost too many brothers already."

Not only could Elliot forgive him. But after all that, he could call an outsider like Vincent his own brother...

Demios disappears and Vincent sobs into his little brother's shoulder, a loud, childish wail as he realizes.

Maybe that was all he ever really wanted, was forgiveness.

[camels-pen]

warning: eating disorders/food issues

-

"Something wrong with it?"

Usopp startled and snapped his head to the side. His nose jabbed Sanji's eye and they both hissed. Usopp jerked away to rub the tip of his nose.

"Fuck, I forgot about that," Sanji grumbled. There was a contrasting, fond smile on his face as rubbed his eye. "Anyway, the food?"

"What about it?"

"What's wrong with it?"

Usopp turned his gaze back to his plate. Plenty of pork chops piled high- at Luffy's request for a meat-filled dinner- and mashed potatoes with green beans on the side. His mouth salivated again just staring at it.

"Nothing," he said. "Just taking my time."

He could feel Sanji's unimpressed stare. "You've been 'taking your time' through the whole dinner. Everyone's already finished and left. The moss ball even finished the dishes, and we both know how he likes to dawdle."

Despite himself, Usopp giggled quietly. When it was his turn to do dishes, Zoro always took his time, waiting for Sanji to get frustrated with his speed and leave him to finish it alone. It was the perfect strategy to steal booze when Sanji wasn't looking, but it seemed Usopp had unknowingly thwarted his first sake stealing attempt after their reunion.

As if reading his mind, Sanji said, "I let him steal that alcohol, you know. I'm not that stupid." He huffed, voice sounding like he was pouting as he added, "It's the only damn way I can keep an eye on his shitty drinking habits. He'd constantly drink us dry otherwise, that damn mossheaded bastard."

Usopp giggled again and made the mistake of glancing up at him. Sanji was staring across the room at the kitchen, probably the place he'd put all the good booze. He'd confided in Usopp, once, that he had two hiding places for drinking alcohol: one, more obvious place, by the fridge for the cheap stuff, and another, hidden somewhere he wouldn't say, for all the more expensive and high quality stuff. He'd confidently crowed, on more than one occasion, that despite the cheap stuff always going missing, he'd never lost a drop of anything else. He always looked so smug saying that, and well, Usopp now knew why.

But then his eye- the left one now, and despite looking right at it, the change had still caught him off guard more than once- turned to Usopp and Usopp clammed up. Sanji stared at him, his eyebrow- this one curled on the opposite side, closer to his nose bridge than his ear- raised high on his forehead. "If you're well enough to laugh at Zoro, it can't be that bad."

Usopp gulped. Looked away. "I'm not sick," he said quietly. "The food looks great, Sanji, really. Eating is just..." He trailed off. Neither of them spoke for a long moment, only the sounds of their distant crewmates enjoying the sight of their descent to the ocean's floor filling the galley.

Sanji's arm slowly, hesitantly, laid on the back of his chair- Sanji didn't used to hesitate, but, he supposed, things had changed. He settled himself in the chair next to Usopp, rather than continue to lean over him, and said softly, "Eating is just...?"

Usopp stared at the grain on the table, studying the lines and deviations with an intense and sudden fascination.

"Usopp."

"It's hard," he mumbled.

Another silence, this one less expecting and more confused. Awkward.

"You ate fine at breakfast...?" Sanji said, voice lilting up at the end, almost in question.

Usopp snorted. 'Ate fine' was a kinder way of putting it. Usopp had demolished breakfast, nearly rivaling Luffy with how much and how quickly he ate. The usual sense of desperation had dimmed slightly, now that he was with his crew, but it was still there, dictating his eating habits. He would've felt more ashamed if he hadn't seen Luffy, Franky, and Brook eating in the exact same disgusting manner. Instead, he felt right at home.

He had wondered, privately, if something similar had happened to them. Had tossed around the idea of asking them about it. Then he would think back to how they used to eat, before. How it was exactly the same. How they had all basically cried that they'd so dearly missed Sanji's cooking. He couldn't blame them, he nearly sobbed over Sanji's pancakes- and then did sob over his hashbrowns.

"The island got hungry at dawn," he started. Stopped. Stared at the little vase of daisies at the centre of the table that Robin had gathered from her garden- now shared with Usopp. "It would close up. Then open. After, everything was... safe. For a little while."

He gulped again, cringing at his dry throat. He stared at the glass of water, a little wet stain under it. Luffy had bumped his glass earlier when he stole a few chops off of Usopp's pile.

Usopp didn't reach for it.

"You know, I was expecting grand stories of your heroics when you finally talked about where you were." Usopp shrunk in his seat. "No- no, come on I didn't mean it like that. I was just trying to make a joke."

"You should leave the jokes to the experts." Usopp's lip quirked. "Even Brook's better than you."

Out of the corner of his eye, Sanji scowled. "Brook wouldn't know a good joke if it kicked him upside the head."

Usopp giggled again, relaxing. "Admit it, you missed his skull jokes."

Sanji huffed. "...Maybe a little."

In the background, they could hear Zoro talking about taking a swim followed by a familiar thud and Nami yelling at him. They both giggled this time, leaning into each other.

"God, I missed everyone. I missed-" Sanji cut himself off and Usopp turned to look at him. There was a wobble to his lips and his visible eye stared intently at him. Usopp would almost say Sanji looked longing- yearning, even- if he didn't know better.

"I know," he said. "I missed everyone too." Sanji's eyes pinched a little at the corners, but Usopp didn't know why. He didn't linger on it long though, what with Sanji's smile as he pressed his temple to Usopp's for a moment. Usopp's heart would've beat wildly two years ago, but now all he felt was warm and content.

Sanji hummed in agreement and pulled away. Patting his pockets, likely for a cigarette. Usopp pulled the one tucked behind his ear, admiring the feel of soft blond hair a moment too long before handing it to him. Sanji chuckled and accepted it with a quiet thanks.

He lit it and sat back in his chair, relaxing with the first inhale. "Back to the important stuff." Usopp would argue all of that was important stuff. "You only felt safe to eat breakfast?"

Usopp shook his head. Then tilted it side to side. "No- well, sort of. It was never really safe, but..." He rolled the words around his mouth, feeling out the right ones while discarding others. "It was... easier. To eat a lot in the morning. Gather food later in the day. Then sleep when I got hungry closer to sunset."

Sanji blew out a puff of smoke. "You didn't have anyone to watch your back while you were eating?"

"I did." Usopp nodded, a sense of pride filling him as he puffed out his chest. "Heracles'n was a great friend and teacher! We took turns watching out for each other and, well, he's the reason I survived that island in the first place." He flexed one of his biceps. "He also helped me get a whole lot stronger!"

Sanji pursed his lips around his cigarette. "But you didn't eat dinner. Or lunch." Today nor in nearly two years, though Sanji likely meant the latter.

Usopp deflated, arm settling back down in his lap. "We couldn't stop moving until sunset. By then it was better to sleep and eat heap loads in the morning rather than risk dinner and not getting enough rest." He sighed. "Heracles'n was always telling me to eat more berries and fruit throughout the day, but..."

Sanji stared at him. "You had this-island-is-too-scary-so-I-can't-eat-anything-itis?"

Usopp scowled. "I'd like to see you keep up an appetite when you're constantly running and hiding from giant-"

Sanji used his arm to tug Usopp closer, so their sides were pressed together. He pressed his nose to Usopp's hair. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

"What for?" Usopp whispered back.

Sanji didn't answer, his breaths warming Usopp's head. The galley had grown silent when he finally spoke, the others having found quieter activities or retired to their rooms.

"If I was stronger then- or quicker-"

"Sanji," Usopp said. "There's no way you would've been able to beat Kuma, back then."

Sanji shook his head. "I know, but maybe we could've been sent somewhere together."

There was a bittersweet, choking feeling in the back of Usopp's throat. A burning in his eyes. "You wouldn't have liked it there," he said, laying his head on Sanji's shoulder. "You would've hated it, actually."

"But I would've been with you."

Usopp laughed, the sound wet and brittle. "I wouldn't wish that island on anyone, Sanji, but least of all you. I'm not worth-"

A hand cupped his face, cutting him off as he was turned to face Sanji. His nose was bent, pressing against Sanji's cheek. "You worth a lot, Usopp. You're worth it to-" Sanji's cheeks dusted pink all of a sudden and he looked away. "You're worth a lot. And it would've been nice if I could have watched your back. Made sure you were eating well."

At a loss for words, Usopp turned back to the table, staring at his plate. The mashed potatoes were surely cold and hard by now and he was fairly certain a thick pork chop wouldn't stay down.

The green beans, maybe. Those could work.

He picked one up. His stomach rumbled. He lifted it to his mouth.

His hands shook.

He gulped again. Stared at his hand intensely.

Sanji's hand covered his own. A sudden, terrible spike of anxiety overwhelmed him and he held his breath, hoping Sanji wasn't going to just force him to eat it. He hated wasting food after all and it was already in Usopp's hand and Usopp himself just needed to quit cowering and just eat it already-

Sanji pulled his hand away from his mouth. The tension left Usopp in a rush. Shame took up where anxiety had left, but he forced himself to meet Sanji's eye. He knew what came next.

Before Sanji could say anything, Usopp blurted, "There was food. On the island. Not just fruits and berries and whatever game we could hunt. Pre-cooked food, I mean." Sanji's brow furrowed, but Usopp continued on. "There were these plants- and rivers- that had cake and burgers and ramen and- well, you get the idea. And the closer you got to the centre of the island, the more tasty the food got." He gulped. Coughed a little. Sanji reached for his glass, but Usopp grabbed his wrist in a tight hold. If he didn't get it all out now, he never would.

"I didn't meet Heracles'n immediately. I was on my own at first and- and I didn't completely trust him at first either." He laughed, the sound as self-deprecating as it felt. "The centre of the island, that's where its mouth is."

Sanji's eyebrow furrowed further. "So when you said the island 'got hungry'..."

Usopp nodded. "It was a trap to lure in prey." Quietly, he added, "Like me."

Sanji gasped, his eyes darting down, and wow, Usopp really should've re-thought the whole 'show off his new muscles by going shirtless' plan. He pulled away from Sanji, and pulled up the waist of his pants. "Staring at my stretch marks isn't going to change anything, y'know."

Sheepishly, Sanji said, "Sorry- sorry, I should know better." He held out his arms, with a sad little pout. "Come back?"

Usopp held out for a few moments, glaring at him, but he sighed and eventually gave in. "I hate you," he mumbled into Sanji's shoulder. Sanji patted his back in response.

The two of them sat there in silence once more. Usopp savoured the contact between them, like he had always dreamed of on Boin.

"You had to train yourself to avoid delicious looking foods, then," Sanji said quietly. Usopp nodded. "That makes sense. But then, breakfast?"

A new wave of shame, far heavier than the last. He dug his forehead into Sanji's shoulder. "I don't want to talk about it."

He didn't know how to explain how he had become some kind of wild animal during meals and he didn't want to explain. Heracles'n was already one person too many and earlier, the entire crew had seen him. His heart beat hard and fast in his chest at the reminder, a belated rush of fear to make up for his single minded focus at breakfast.

"Then I won't ask," Sanji said. "You should tell Chopper though-"

Usopp grimaced. "Eventually, but..."

Sanji sighed, pressing his cheek to Usopp's hair. "Okay, but can I make you something? Just a snack or tea or...?"

Usopp huffed. "Sanji-"

"I know, I know! But letting you go to bed hungry is..."

"Hard," Usopp finished for him, pulling away. "I know."

He wasn't going anywhere before Sanji fed him, of that he was sure, but it made Usopp's stomach queasy just thinking about all the snacks Sanji used to make before they were separated.

Some of it must have shown on his face too, since Sanji was already holding up his hands and starting to look even more concerned. "It doesn't have to be anything special. I could just peel a tangerine for you or slice up some apples or juice some pears- I mean oranges! Why would anyone juice pears- oh, hm, I should check that sometime; remind me to write it down. Oh and maybe I could steep a really bitter tea, so you don't have to worry about drinking too much because I know you hate bitter things-"

And Usopp couldn't help himself. He laughed.

Sanji deflated, his brow furrowed in confusion, or maybe it was concern. Usopp didn't know, he was too busy laughing at the absurdity of Sanji being so anxious and speaking every rambling thought. It was adorable and Usopp couldn't help but reach up and squish Sanji's cheeks.

"I lo-" Sanji's eye widened and suddenly, Usopp didn't feel brave enough. "Lost my notebook. We'll have to use one of yours."

"O-Oh, yeah, sure." Sanji nodded, voice slightly muffled by his squished cheeks. He stared at Usopp, his eye asking another question.

Usopp looked away, his eyes landing on the fruit bowl on the bar counter. There were apples, bananas, and pears. He pulled his hands away. "...Nami will be mad at you." he said quietly, weakly.

Sanji sighed, a shaky, relieved little thing. He wrapped his arms around Usopp's middle, crushing him to his chest. "I think she'll forgive me," he said.

Boldly, Usopp added, "What if you made coffee?" The only coffee in the pantry was a fancy jar brought along from a Revolutionary base near a village that prided themselves on their harvest.

Sanji chuckled. "Robin would forgive me too."

Usopp hummed. "You seem awfully confident."

"I am," he said, pulling away completely, his chair squeaking against the floorboards as he stood. Sanji held out a hand, a smile on his lips. "If you don't believe me, let me show you."

And right here, Usopp could've chosen to laugh it off. Said something about not wanting to face Nami's wrath, much less Robin's. Fled the galley completely with an excuse or three and sleep in his workshop while ignoring any and all feelings of guilt. It would've been easy.

But he'd already accepted it. Acknowledged the inevitable consequences instead of turning down those anxious suggestions. How could he do anything else, in the face of such genuine care and concern? To leave now would just hurt them both and the last thing Usopp wanted to do was hurt Sanji.

And, well, he trusted Sanji, to do what he couldn't. Planned to trust him with his heart, at some point.

Trusting him with his stomach, in comparison, was as easy as breathing.

So, Usopp placed a steady hand in Sanji's own, a small, teasing smile on his face, and said, "Lead the way."

[roadkillracoon]

I'm fairly new to the jojo fandom, so this might be a generalization, but I've seen one too many people disregard Jotaro's ex-wife. Like those guys are completely missing the angst potential of him still being SO in love with her, but having to leave her AND his beloved daughter behind to keep them safe. He's a very stoic and scary looking guy, and the idea that she's one of the only people who looked past that and just GETS him, only for him to give it up hurrrts man. Idk I just imagine him coming home after being attacked by some loser stand user like way too close to his house, and seeing his little family, and realizing that he has a very difficult decision to make. Both decisions being some form of selfish in their own way, but one destroying him more. Him handing divorce papers to the love of his life tight lipped. Feeding her lies that he no longer has any love for her, each one paining him to say. Her demanding a proper explanation and begging to talk it out, apologizing for something that isn't her fault, and him shrugging it off as if it didn't mean anything to him. As if it wouldn't keep him up at night for YEARS after it happened.

[impbites]

OCtober day 31 - costume 🐶🤕🧟🧛

i've drawn my hellebores a lot this event so i figured i'd end on them too‼️around halloween time tip and jerza don't even need to disguise themselves, but i made them dress up anyway c:

3 days late but i did it!!! i've completed all the mandatory days and now halloween can officially end 😈🎃 ty for the fun event everyone, i've rlly enjoyed seeing everyone's characters 🫶

[myaoiboy]

what are ur hcs for the boscelhira dynamic?

These bitches are so deeply unhealthy on every level lmaoooo

I'm super torn on whether Ocelot ever actually directly tells Big Boss that he's attracted to him, purely out of such a fucked up yandere level of hero worship. Especially before the Ground Zeroes incident I think he assumes a) that his feelings go without saying and b) that bibo is indestructible, and GZ is a huge wake up call for him. I have a fic in my wip folder about this exact thing because I'm obsessed with ocelot I am genuinely rotating him in my brain at all times. :3

Meanwhile Kaz is extremely straightforward. I feel like he has some fucked up ideas about masculinity and sexuality early on, but hey, gay people tend to congregate around all the snakes in large numbers, so any internalized homo/biphobia that he might have had has to evaporate pretty quickly. He definitely makes the first move on Bibo, he tries the moves that he uses on (many, many) women, and ends up getting absolutely plowed.

Big Boss, to me, is an autistic aroace king who doesn't really *get* sex and/or romance, but is down to fuck if only because he knows it's something other people put a lot of value on and it feels good, and as an extension of hand-to-hand combat. Because of that sex-as-an-extension-of-combat mindset I feel like he doesn't bottom much if ever (maybe, *MAYBE* if the Boss were into pegging, but lbr she's probably a lil too homophobic for that).

Kaz is cool with that, especially in the early MSF days. It's like having a tiger on a leash. He basically has a supersoldier to fuck him senseless.

I think maybe BB and Ocelot meet quietly on occasion through the MSF days, but if they fuck at all in this time it's mostly just what BB kind of assumes he's supposed to do, from interacting with Kaz. tbh Ocelot gets off from the weirdest shit so anything *real* is just a bonus.

Ocelot is *extremely* jealous of Kaz, not just for the sex, but for even getting to see Bibo on a regular basis. This fic is basically to me what I think their first meeting would/should be like (actually this whole series of fics is so good i recommend it): https://archiveofourown.org/works/37886539

(There's another fic that I looked for very quickly but couldn't find that includes Ocelot saying a line like "I just wanted to see what all the buzz was about" after they fuck, it may also be a part of that series, but I'm struggling rn lol)

Ocelot pretends it's not jealousy and is instead a totally justified dislike. Definitely thinks of him as Zero's slutty lapdog. He spends the time between MGS3/PO (take your pick on canonicity) and GZ keeping tabs on Snake for what he pretends are totally professional, impersonal, non-obsessive reasons. This is not true, obviously. Definitely hopes that Kaz is dead in the devastation.

Goes on an enormous bender between the attack and finding out that Bibo is alive, maybe the only time that he really, truly lets himself completely lose control. Definitely think at least once he gets REAL fucking close to ODing and gets to talk to the Sorrow for a lil bit. Might be how he finds out Snake isn't dead/won't die.

If they haven't at least hooked up anonymously before, Kaz and Ocelot definitely start to in this 9 year gap. Ocelot knows a lot about the human body and does some fancy acupunctury/knife-y stuff to help with the pain from his injuries because, y'know, they're stuck together for now.

Ocelot totally fucks Kaz because he's the person closest to Big Boss left in the world. Ocelot isn't much of a top himself, but he tops Kaz just to figure out what he's used to, using Kaz to build up this mental model of how Big Boss must fuck using the negative space he's left behind.

I genuinely think that up to this point they REALLY could have saved one another. They're one another's perfect foil, they cover one another's weaknesses, Kaz is all rage on his own behalf but doesn't know when to cut ties, Ocelot refuses to grow a single vertebra if it might inconvenience Big Boss.

I do think that Ocelot spent a lot of time at Zanzibarland, and that Kaz intentionally helped time Intrude F014 for a time that Ocelot wouldn't be there, from some lack of desire to kill his...complicated ex lover.

I think Ocelot would absolutely be furious that he wasn't let die with his boss, and intentionally lets Kaz live in 2005 as punishment (I like biblical allusion and so the idea of Kaz living the story of Cain/Pontius Pilate's doorman, cursed to live a wandering life until the second coming of jesus, or in Kaz's situation, the third(?) coming of Big Boss makes me kick my feet and giggle)

Gonna stop for now cause this is getting like. Comedically long for what you asked lol. But I am more than willing to talk about this forever i love them they're my favorite toxic barbies

but genuinely yall thank you, you're making me think about this which means that I can add a little more to the bunch of fics I have half written and scared to finish lmaoooo

[truthprevail]

what are sae's thoughts on makoto's goals?

i'm guessing this about her wanting to become a police commissioner?

i don't think sae's thrilled at the idea of it. for one, their father died on the line of duty — even after joker's interrogation, i don't think she's miraculously alright with the fact her father did die while doing his job.

during joker's interrogation, sae will note how similar makoto is to her late father and how she doesn't want makoto to end up like him (aka. dead). i think it's also important to note that sae believed (and she's probably right) that her father was used as a sacrificial pawn — this aligns with the system she does know. the system that she was apart of and was an agent of maintaining the corrupt status quo. she doesn't want makoto be be used as a pawn by her higher ups.

it's also important to think about sae's own experience as someone working in the system. remember, she ultimately leaves the public prosecutor's office because she can't change it from within but she can still fight for justice. i don't believe it was explicit in the game that she wants to change the system from within (if i'm wrong correct me, i couldn't find clips), however, i do believe that sae thinks that's why makoto wants to become police commissioner.

i think as makoto's sister, she feels conflicted about it.

on one hand, sae's a realist that knows that no one individual can change the system from within — no matter the rank. she is acutely aware of this especially after shido's palace and witnessing how it's not just one individual who corrupts the system — it's a network. no matter how noble a person is, if they don't align with the values of the corrupt network of individuals, they will be opposed at every turn, they will have people scheming against them... hell, their life could be in danger.

sae does not to watch makoto be in that position. she doesn't want to see her ideals crushed over and over again — or hell, being promoted to police commissioner is contingent on the recommendations of other higher ups... someone who fits in. she doesn't want makoto to fall complacent and lose sight of things to pursue a promotion like she did as a prosecutor.

on the other hand, she really wants to believe in makoto. she wants to believe that if anyone can change things from within it's her sister. she wants to have faith in her, wants to cheer her on through everything — but damn does she struggle.

of course she'll still try to be as supportive as she can but if makoto decides to ask sae for her opinion she will be blunt about things — she will tell makoto about her concerns but what's different now is that she would affirm her that no matter what path she chooses sae'll support her.

i guess the tl;dr is that sae doesn't like it but what can she do, huh?

[immobiliter]

some miscellaneous birthday thoughts for everyone's favourite pretend archon~

i was hoping hoyo would elaborate on this but they did not, so i will: we learned last year from neuvillette's birthday message that furina's birthday is a public holiday in fontaine, and remains so to this day, presumably meaning that things weren't changed after the events of the archon quest.

this implies to me two things, one, that no matter fontaine's collective feelings about their archon after the flood, furina's birthday is actually less about furina herself and reflects more on fontaine as a whole. a public holiday that has been in existence in this nation for anywhere up to 500 years has likely taken on a life of its own, with its own traditions and rituals, and can probably exist without her, in all honesty. it's like how christmas is as much a cultural holiday as it is a religious one, and can be enjoyed even by those who aren't religious. and two, that someone ( probably neuvillette considering he brings it up lmao ) insisted that the tradition continue even after furina's retirement

going back to the theme of christmas, there are a lot of parallels with various elements of christianity within the fontaine archon quest. i don't consider myself enough of an expert to go into them all, but furina, as the human representation of the divine who is sent to her nation to "save" her people from their original sin, and then is subsequently turned on by those people but is still willing to die in order to save them, and is someone who can literally walk on water gameplay wise, has a lot of parallels to jesus. i do think that her birthday in many ways functions in fontainian society similarly to how christmas works in the western world. yes, it's about celebrating the birthday of their archon, but to many it's actually less about that than it is a celebration of fontaine as a whole. i also think it's fitting for furina that even her birthday isn't really about her, although during her time as archon i am sure that she insisted on certain things because it's a way to reinforce the idea that she is their god, after all

pre-AQ, i imagine there is a lot of ceremony involved. for those who know what trooping the colour involves here in the uk, i am thinking along the same lines — chevreuse's voice line about furina talks about her once insisting on some kind of ceremonial musketeer performance and i think there would be some kind of similar officialdom from the various sections of the maison gardiennage to show fealty to their archon, with a lot of pomp and ceremony. i suspect that sort of stuff is inevitably dropped from furina's birthday celebrations after the AQ, but any other traditions that have been adopted by the fontainian people ( and the nature of it being a public holiday where the fontainian people can be at home with their families ) remain.

this also means that this birthday, timeline wise, is not only the first birthday that furina gets to celebrate as an ordinary human being, but also the first birthday she gets to celebrate where she has actually aged. of course, her age always increased every birthday, but she was cursed by focalors to forever remain the way she is, and to never visibly look any older or show any signs of aging. the fact that she can now say that she is a whole year older, both mentally and physically, is a big, big deal to her.

[undead-potatoes]

Finally got to that Act 2 Durge camp scene if you refuse to kill Isobel last night, and while I've seen that scene like a billion times other places, going through it with both Astarion and Shadowheart as Aurora gave me some thoughts whirring in my head

Aurora's mental state for most of the game is in the gutter. Like the level of self-loathing she carries with her at all times is honestly a bit much, leading her to be very self sacrificing and borderline suicidal. She's kept it together thus far, even finding some renewed hope and purpose after discovering her connection to Lathander at the monastery, but when she's forced to almost kill a loved one in camp she just falls apart completely.

When she's finally back to her self again, all she has left in her is tears. She's just so tired. Between the sleepless nights, the chronic headaches and pains, the constant battles both within and without her cup is already full, and now it's spilling over.

She genuinely contemplates just leaving, putting as much distance between herself and the others as she can before turning, maybe taking down some shadowy abominations with her as she goes. And if push came to shove, a dagger to the heart always does the trick.

She's kept her Urge mostly secret until now, afraid of what the others would think, and is very pleasantly surprised to discover she's met with compassion of all things. The others are wary of her, sure, but none of them seem to blame her for her affliction, and seem mostly preoccupied with how to avoid any possible incidents in the future.

And then there's Astarion, who almost got killed by her uncontrollable bloodlust, and Shadowheart, who could just as easily have become the victim had the dice of fate rolled slightly differently. The way both of them are so supportive of her, seemingly unfazed by the moral aspects of the Urge. How Astarion is being a little cheeky about the whole thing, joking about it in all the right ways to ease the tension, while Shadowheart's more earnest and serious approach still makes her feel seen and taken seriously.

To be met with such understanding and love when she has none for herself is so important to her I think, to have something more to live for than just a sense of duty and spite. Someone to keep the candle of hope lit, even when the Urge tries to snuff it out.

[byanyan]

hhhh ran into some issues and my "fun lil thing" became a frustrating lil thing so now i'm gonna just. post it when i wake up. and now writing is definitely not happening tonight lmao

but i'll leave u with a spooky month icon change as i go to throw myself into bed

[dynmghts]

TRANSMISSION FROM @osoreruna : "why didn't you say something before? why didn't you tell me? tell SOMEONE?" EMOTIONAL STARTERS , ACCEPTING .

feeling interrogated is one thing. katsuki has been on the receiving end of that before, where people try to delve in to find the heart of the reason, determined to mine out the truth even if they have to take a sledgehammer to it / that, he could handle. he didn't spend a lot of time caring about extras trying to get something out of him, because he didn't care about them.

but nothing prepares him for the feeling of interrogation from his idol, his mentor, one of the few people he holds in high regards ; nothing prepares him for all might asking that question of why.

the young bakugou's teeth grit together. his brows furrow, gaze avoiding all might's while his hands clench into tight fists. some of the choice words he has in mind never make it past his throat, while others await on the tip of his tongue, waiting for the moment he cracks ... [ because while the hurricane spirals and lashes against the world, a boy resides in the eye, sheltered and protected and isolated all the same. ] ... and can't contain his thoughts anymore.

why didn't you say something before, the question echoes, and katsuki finally snaps back ; ❛ why the fuck would i ?! ❜ his shoulders ache with their rigidity, palms hurting at his nails embedding into calloused skin. his hands shake. with his fringe in the way, it's hard to see anything beyond the curled up and vicious snarl he wears - but he makes himself smaller, almost, hunching over with his arms closing around him. [ stains of hot salt water sting his cheeks, but he refuses to lift his gaze and face his idol. ]

katsuki's fingers curl with tension, no longer digging into palms ... but they are rigid instead, tendons and muscles struggling to maintain their position as the ache snakes its way up his arms. ❛ i don't treat my issues like they're some story people are entitled to hear ! all they'll do at the end of it is pity me, anyway, and i don't need that. hell, i don't fucking want that ! ❜

a sharp breath follows, and katsuki reaches to grab at his other arm. his heart hammers against his ribcage. its furious and erratic beat gnashes at bone with an intense protest, his lungs filling up with a billowing and thick smoke that smothers oxygen, even as he tries to control his breathing. the inner tempest roars and presses violently against his larynx. he wanted so, so badly to not lose himself in front of all might like this / he was fighting it with every fibre of his being.

[ but as he steadies his breath enough to talk, he knows : it was a fight he couldn't win. not this time. ]

❛ this is my shit to deal with, and i - i have it handled. ❜ his aching hand reaches to wipe away at the string of salt water down his face, grimacing at its texture. ❛ don't treat me like i haven't. ❜

[lookwhatyoumademelou]

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