#this is true of most talented male musical artists actually

[holdoncallfailed]

james murphy is an interesting figure to me because every LCD soundsystem album oscillates wildly between excruciatingly beautiful music that moves me to tears and the stupidest most self-important misogynistic drivel i've ever heard in my life. sometimes even within the same song.

[solarwynd]

I don't know if you have heard of the popstar academy docuseries on netflix but it's about the group katseye and how they debuted and stuff but anyways. their main goal is for them to find a global group that will essentially carry the company from now on like they want this group to be their next BTS but mostly focusing for success in the US. theres this girl there that was a trainee and she was very talented and had star quality but they weren't as interested in her because they felt she was not "the cool rebellious girl" US fans will love and that got me to think about jungkook and jimin. the tattoos, piercings, muscles, the pr smoking incident, him drinking on lives deleting his instagram vs jimin who only does lives at the company, doesn't even like to talk about alcohol in fans vicinity, timid, tries to keep a clean image, the goody two shoes (said lovingly)

now it makes sense to me as to why they push jk so hard especially in the US. he is much more marketable and what supposedly US fans want in male pop artists. they know that the rugged bad boy sells and jimin isn't that

Yea I did. I’ve been in eyekon business for a day or two now lol. I even started watching the show but I haven’t made it past the first episode. I’m really just privy to the Manon drama, but I have seen screenshots of Bang and his foolishness.

“Cool & rebellious” are interesting buzzwords. Two that I can’t exactly say aren’t popular because it sounds like aespa and blackpink. And kpop stans do love that. But what’s really popular right now is the newjeans aesthetic. Which is exactly what Touch was in “sound” and also why I’m confused on what they’re going for in the group’s image. It sounds like they don’t even know. The only thing for certain is that they wanted a multi ethnic group. I listened to their EP and it doesn’t seem like they’re gonna have a set sound and I don’t think that’s an issue. Their music is nice, most of the songs give real summery coming of age vibes. (I liked tonight I might, im pretty and my way) kinda wish they would’ve stuck with that throughout the album cause debut and touch seem like the odd ones out.

Back to the actual topic, Yes I think that cool and rebellious image has more of an advantage for a male popstar for obvious reasons. Jimin not fitting Hybe’s image has been discussed as a possibility as to one of the reasons he’s not getting pushed before but to actually see they confirmed what their ideal is let’s me know how shallow their vision of a true artist is. You’d think they see the results, hype and intrigue Jimin pulls just being him and see that ideal doesn’t hold that much weight as a standard but w/e ig lmao. JK didn’t even fit that stereotypical “bad boy” mold up until recently imo.

Anyway the way HYBE seems so intent on finding the next BTS and strictly speaking in business terms, I really do wonder how much longer BTS themselves are in this for cause to me, it seems like there’s a clock running and Katseye does not seem like the long term solution to me. I know it wouldn’t be smart to wait until BTS calls it quits to then try to build a new group, but they give new jeans. I believe that they’ll find success somewhere down the line, especially if HYBE starts pushing them. But might fizzle out after some time. Touch seems to be gaining some traction and they are building a fanbase. But if they want BTS level fame, it’s gonna have to be a devout one that actually moves for them and not one built of male gg stans that use them for a twitter layout and move out once they get bored. Fandom>>>GP

[firstdivisiongirl]

hi! i was wondering if i could get male tokyo revengers matchup? perfect match please!

ᓚᘏᗢ general info:

/ she/her / enfp / 7w8 / leo /

𓆈appearance𓆈

𓆈 i'm tall, taller than most of my friends → i'm 6'2. my figure is hourglass shaped, something like models in 50s/60s fashion magezines, i think. i have shaggy golden blonde thick curls, my hair is long so i usually tie it up in two buns and two braids (like goldilocks from puss in boots: the last wish). my eyes are amber. i have skinny hands with long fingers

𓆈 my clothing style is mix of whimsigoth, cryptidcore and grandmacore. i really like unusual jewelry → weird shaped rings, earrings, brooches (i especially love the insect shaped and art nouveau ones)

𓆣personality𓆣

𓆣 i'm positive and upbeat person, i try to see the bright side in most situations. i'm friendly, cheerful and bubbly. i'm full of energy and i can be a bit chaotic, but i try to be as responsible as possible, i want people to feel that they can rely on me

𓆣 i'm really confident and i'm not afraid to express myself

𓆣 i care about my friends and family a lot, and go out of my way to show it. i love making people smile

𓆣 i'm super kind person, but won't take any nonsense

𓆣 i have morbid, dark sense of humor. sometimes i randomly say a weird obscure fact in the middle of conversation

𓆣 i'm kinda struggling with taking rest, doing nothing, because there is always something to do, something new to learn, etc. → i'm afraid of stagnation. i overwork myself a lot

𓆣 can't think of anything that i don't like, guess i'm so fixated on my hobbies and passions, i don't pay any attention to other things

𓃹 my hobbies 𓃹

𓃹 dancing and performing. i'm ballet dancer since i was a kid. i also try my skills as figure skater

𓃹 sewing and knitting. i sew most of my clothes and i made for myself tons of sweaters, with most silly patterns like characters from old cartoons, for example "wilk i zając" or "krecik"

𓃹 playing on instruments. i can play on violin, cello, piano, guitar, saxophone, harp and drums, i'm currently learning how to play on trumpet

𓃹 learning. about world and universe or learning new skills. i'm deeply fascinated by space and oceans, they're still unknown to humanity, learning about them makes me sigh in wonder and admiration. i also love nature, i could spend days wandering in forests, observing and learning about animals, insects, plants

𓃹 doll making. i love making dolls, puppets, marionettes. wooden, porcelain, rag, basically every type. i organize puppet theaters, sometimes i give my works as gifts to my loved ones

𓃹 art, any kind of art actually. i like to learn about artists and their work, and i like to try different types of art. sculpting, painting, ceramics, photography, filmmaking, i adore them all. i work as illustrator for fantasy books and books for kids (and honestly this job is dream come true for me!)

𓃹 gardening and herbalism. i work on in garden a lot, i grow flowers, vegetables and herbs. i know herbal medicine, i make my own infusions and tinctures

𓃹 cooking and baking. i learn new recipes whenever i have the opportunity. my favorite things to bake are bread and cookies. i also pick mushrooms, dry them or pickle them

sorry if it's too long or too chaotic (⁠･ั⁠ω⁠･ั⁠)

thank you so much for even reading this! (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠)

Hello. It isn't too chaotic at all. I think I found the perfect match for you! I hope you like it!

You Got...

South Terano!!!

Would love to have you play music with him. He himself is a pianist.

Would love to watch you perform by yourself. Having a talented S/O would make him a proud man.

Would love how artistic you are. It makes him happy (wanted a music pun but could not think of any. Ten years of piano lessons down the drain)

He is a very dark person. So you're sense of humor would be something is loves.

Loves your confidence and how cheerful are. He is also like that too, so I think he wouldn't want someone timid. He loves chaos.

I think dates would be piano bars...or art galleries. Just be warned, he may get kicked out.

[papirouge]

i still kinda like taylor swifts music but fell down the swiftie rabbit hole and went back to 2012 when she actually dated Conor Kennedy when he was still in high school. She’d drop him off and even sign him out of school because he couldn’t do it himself because you know… hes still a student. She was obsessed with the old money Americana aesthetic then and tried to dress like Jackie O and other old money types to impress him. According to his friends from school, she was clingy. But he was really weird too since he thought it was appropriate to bring her to his mothers grave site (his mother committed suicide) early in the relationship with other family members while his dad brought his mistress. She bought a house near the family. She also crashed his family’s wedding once too. I have friends that come from that old money world on the east coast of the US so I love to hear the tea from them. And let me tell you, it’s hilarious that they think they’re better than other people for having generational wealth and famous names. When they are messier than the kardashians lol why taylor wanted that is beyond me but she was obsessed when she was around 22ish and the age when most people are graduating university. But she chased high schoolers. But bring any of that up now and you’re called a misogynist

kgkfkfkeoskgkroe not you tea dumping on Taylor Swift xDDD

Honestly I'm a VERY nosy person but Taylor Swift is just.....not that interesting for me to check on her like that 😅

I heard of her fling with that Kennedy kid and the creepy age gap though. She really was your typical 'pickme' back then, but tbh I won't judge her because I have been 23 too and I know how stupid and male identified we can be at that age....though pursuing a barely legal teen was creepy and she was old enough to grasp that. So it's very ironic to see her diss Jake Gyllenhaal profiting off the dynamic unbalance in their age gap relationship. Like..sis, that's you 💀 you actively pursued a barely legal teen who wasn't that much into you... should he also make a song dissing you abusing his youthful cluelessness about romantic boundaries? 🤔 People are right to call her out about she acting like she's ALWAYS the victim somehow......

That being said, I think the people who say a bunch of mainstream media & scrote despise/hate her bc she never let herself being sexualized or display sexual availability is true though. But I also think we shouldn't be naive and act like she didn't have skeleton in her closed like EVERY celebrity of that range has, just bc she writes unproblematic cutesy lyrics...

Genuinely good people cannot make it in Hollywood/music industry. Or they reach a glass ceiling and/or eventually nope out. That's how you know an artist or band didn't sell out. Some artists have actual steady popular success but you never hear of them bc they're not supported by mass media & sponsors who back up only 'their own'. That's also why you have many talented artists who had a very promising career and disappeared overnight.

[thornstocutyouwith]

Name: Crispin Azaziah Murray

Meaning of Name: Crispin: Curly-Haired. Azaziah: Whom Jehovah strengthened. Murray: Lord and Master.

Nickname(s): Cris, 

Age: 26-40

Birthday: February 29

Species/Nationality: Mutant/Human, American

Accent: Yes

Language: English

Powers: 

Time Manipulation (Inherited from his mother’s Fountain of Youth object. Broken.)

Nova Manipulation (Inherited from his fathers Molecular Mutation)

Power Residuum (His own)

Weaknesses/Illness/Allergies: Deaf and Mutism, Latex allergy, 

Pet: Brittany Dog (Male, Fran), Sumatran Striped Rabbit (Male, Gray)

Occupation: Artist

Faceclaim: Chad Michael Murray (Alternatively Max Theriot) 

Description: He is blond. His eyes are blue. Has scars near his ears from an infection in infancy. His hair is often kept buzzed as when it grows out it tends to become more curled.

Outfit/Accessories/Jewelry: Hearing aids, 

Height: 6’2”

Weight: 134

Body Build: Lean/Fit

Backstory/Background:

When Crispin was still an infant he had a severe life threatening infection, which left him deaf, ultimately. It also left scars near his ears from the damaged skin the infection affected. Growing up in a popular, famous and wealthy family that had been around for a very long time, Crispin was able to take advantage of all the amenities offered to the child of such prominence. 

As the youngest son of Drakon who was somewhat a mama's boy when he was a child, Crispin was expected to learn the way of the Murray family like his older brother. Though unlike his older brother Crispin had actually taken such a task seriously. Where his brother often, being far older than Crispin, enjoyed sneaking out and getting into trouble with their friends and often partied into the morning. Drakon himself was never too terrible of a father and often wanted to make sure his family was safe, despite his hostile temper at times. But due to his oldest son's party life behavior it became apparent to him that Crispin, the more level headed and calmer of the two would be his true choice to take on the future mantle of the Murray family. 

Because of his family’s oddness overall Crispin was involved in plenty of stranger incidents that resulted in demons and other mutants and the like getting involved in, usually in attacking his family. At one instant while with his mother at a restaurant they were attacked by enemies who had been trying to steal the Fountain of Youth from his mother’s being, as it had been made into an object that she carried within her body. With his father and brother gone Crispin had been the only one around to be there to protect his mother from their attackers. Which left Crispin beaten and his mother almost taken captive. 

However Drakon arrived in time to save his wife and Crispin. Once saved the family returned back home to tend to wounds and make sure their current enemies were diverted to other projects. Crispin again settled back into normal life after having a bullet wound treated. Being that his family had prominence mostly in the medical field and such other big structures, Crispin was also given the best care, enabling him to hear with some of the most advanced hearing aids available, usually not on the market. This allowed him to find he had a lot of talent in music, not in just the playing of musical instruments, but also the singing, mostly in singing. Which he had discovered on one of the many times he was left home alone, because his deafness made his family believe him too weak to take on their usual misadventures. 

So Crispin was often allowed to stay home and in doing so discovered his many other talents that did not have to do with fighting, which he honestly did not care for anyway. Crispin often enjoyed staying home and watching tv. Not always listening to it, but certainly watching it in his spare time. As he did not often wear his hearing aids, enjoying the silence that came without them. This could be said because his life was always full of chaos, with a family like his always being so loud. He had quickly become one of the most quiet members, even to the point of almost becoming entirely invisible. Though in his moments of invisibility, he was allowed to get much more done overall.

For the majority of Crispin’s later childhood and early teen years his life was a relatively stable and calm one. His father (Asuka) abandoned the family, leaving Drakon to take on the majority of responsibilities. Not long after, his brother also left to start his own life, running off with a boyfriend. This left Crispin and Drakon as heads of the family estate. Crispin soon enough became an adult, but stayed on the estate while his father was often away doing business. Leaving him in control of things at home. Though has not taken on the family’s main business, that is in going into the medical field, and has instead decided to mainly become an artist. Which Drakon has yet to weigh any opinion on.

(Work In Progress)

Personality:

Gallant, Focused, Directed, Artistic, Insouciant, Romantic, Courteous, Energetic, Amusing, Physical, Chummy, Mystical, Airy, Disturbing, Willful, Excitable, Crass, Arrogant, Aimless,

Quirks/Savvies/Other: Attracts small woodland animals when they sing, Becomes easily obsessed with things, Collects things related to pigeons, Can easily lose his appetite, Believes in magic, Trying to become a famous artist on youtube, The Ocean annoys him, Believes in vampires, Goes to the museum once a week because they are in love with one of the historical figures, Believes in Pegasi, Photographs nature, Believes in ghosts, Sensitive to criticism, Avoids stepping on cracks on the sidewalk, Collects things related to mythical creatures, Toys/Fidgets with his fingers, Believes in secret societies, Chews on things when he’s stressed, Refuses to drink without a straw, Hums when bored, Stutters, Likes to have his ice crushed …not cubed, Prefers gummy candies, Clicks his tongue when agitated, Rearranges things when he’s bored,

Likes: Gummy candy, Art, Museums, Youtube, Pegasi, Nature, Ghosts, Magic, Vampires, Mythical Creatures, Pigeons, Poetry, Rats, Cemeteries, Sleeping in cars, Christmas, Tabletop Games, Parakeets, Ninja’s, Telescopes, Rain, Sky Diving, Trucks, MMORPGs, Naps, Basketball, Making Soap, Dashing Space Heroes, Obscure Trivia, Fossils, Antiques, Singing, Whales, Monster movies, Playing music, Falling in love, Robotics,

Dislikes: Oceans, Climbing, Chess, Pool, Purple, Being barefoot, Cheerleaders, 

Fears: Insects, Darkness, Needles/Injections,

Personality Tests: INTJ-A,

Other: Pisces, 

Parent(s):

   -> Father: Drakon Murray

   -> Father: Asuka Kita-Murray

Sibling(s): 1 Older Brother (Tate)

Other Relatives: Noah Bellamy (Blood Cousin), Julian, Jeremy, Joshua (Noah’s children) (Blood 2nd Cousin’s), Robin Bellamy (Cousin) (Noah’s Older brother), Christina Bellamy (Cousin)(Noah’s Younger sister) Idunn/Lola Bellamy (Murray) (Blood Aunt) (Drakon and Colden’s triplet Sister), Colden Murray (Drakon and Idunn/Lola’s Triplet brother) (Blood Uncle), Jasper Murray, Darcy Murray, Dorian Murray, Jarvis Murray, Septimus Murray, Sebastian Murray, Isolde Murray (Colden’s Children)(Blood Cousins), Cobra/Simon Storm (Distant Cousin), Throne, Tyra, Tancred (Children of Cobra)(Distant Cousins), Sage and Elliot Razin-Pavlov (Distant Relatives on Drakon’s mother’s Side), 

Starters

Chat’s

Para’s

Face

Stuff

Information

Asks

All

                                                            Alternate Universes

Werewolf AU: 

Born in the Murray family, a family of vast wealth and prominence, due to the family having their hands in all of the pots. Most importantly, they rule the medical field, becoming doctors more than anything else overall. Crispin was born second and youngest of Drakon and Asuka Murray. He has one older brother. Drakon met Asuka while on a visit to Japan and the two fell in love, having their oldest son years before Crispin. By the time Crispin was born there was already a lot of strife within the family. Drakon's younger triplet brother had vanished from the family one day as a child, which had lead to rumors around town that Drakon's father had gotten rid of the brother, possibly even had the boy murdered. 

Then there was Drakon's marriage to Asuka, which was often a point of contention and rumor. Asuka was not willing to settle down, never having adjusted well to Drakon's family, home, or lifestyle. Though Asuka often put up with it, still, not entirely gracefully however. As an infant Asuka was often rumored to be the root cause of the infection that caused Crispin’s deafness. Her negligence in one of the many of Drakon’s business trips was often witnessed by those that worked for the Murray family.  A breaking point for Asuka came when a hit was made on Asuka while she had been out with Crispin to get food. The young boy did what he could to protect his mother from their attackers but was of course, too young, and too weak to stop them. Getting injured in the process, Drakon however came and put an end to the attack, saving Crispin and Asuka.

Asuka had been traumatized by this and continued to be neglectful of their family. For the following months Crispin, along with the rest of his family watched Asuka’ continued to fall apart, becoming an emotional mess. Then one day they had simply just left, without a word. Without ever saying goodbye to her children or husband. No matter how much help they offered, how many times they saved Asuka, Asuka was never going to be someone that was going to stick around. Crispin for years hated Asuka for having abandoned him. But still continued on with his life. Learning the family trade, but never finding any interest in it. His brother would soon leave the family estate as well, going to live with a boyfriend somewhere in town. Crispin was left to tend to the estate, which he was far better at doing than his older brother was.

Life went on, Crispin graduated from school and went on to a university of his choosing, which he didn’t have to work very hard to get into, being as wealthy as his family is. But still, on his own merit, without the use of that money, Crispin was accepted. There he has studied required works to take on the family business…es, one day. Though has also made a name for himself, and a career for himself as an artist and vocalist (which he is allowed to do because of his family’s helping him early in getting the most advanced treatments and hearing aids they could get their hands on, as well as cues help Crispin), which he is the lead of a band in, as a side job to his art career.

Not long after Crispin got into university the long lost brother of Drakon’s just turned back up again. For a time reigniting all the rumors and other speculations around what exactly happened to them. With his uncle’s reemergence Crispin also discovered he has other cousin’s. Outside of Noah’s family. He gets along with those cousin’s more than he does Noah. Crispin hadn’t been born when Noah himself was kidnapped. But had been born years later when Noah had unkidnapped himself. As well as old enough to have vague memories of it. Which itself came back to gossip around town because of his uncle returning. Which means Crispin has to hear about all of the gossip, which has exhausted his interest in his family being talked about by others. Crispin continues to try and keep his life separated from that of the rest of his family’s dramatics.

[horsegurlfem]

You know, I'm interested in why men don't listen to female artists. A lot of male artists' target demographic is women (boy bands especially come to mind, but also artists like Hozier), but the reverse isn't true. There aren't many "girl bands" that have hordes of preteen male fans. But why is that? Boy bands are actually objectified by women, possibly the most notable form of male objectification. So why aren't "girl bands," to be objectified by boys and men? Female artists, even the largest female artists like Taylor Swift and Beyonce have largely female fanbases. Maybe it's because music makes you too powerful. To be a successful musician you have to have talent, to be an artist. When girls and women objectify a man, they still see his humanity. He can be an object of desire while being a talented artist, and this is important to why he's an object of desire in the first place. But for men, objectified women are nothing. They are not talented, they are things. Their talent is a distraction from their true appeal: physical appearance. So men aren't interested in talented women, and this starts when they are preteen boys becoming interested in internet porn instead of talented and beautiful musicians

sometimes I will be talking to a man about music taste and he mentions (a bit embarrassedly) that he doesn't listen to female artists. and then I say that fine I dont listen to male artists

[make-me-imagine]

Congratulations for 8k! May I request headcanons for my Shadow and Bone ship, and a drabble for prompt "Fake Dating" for my Merlin ship? Additionally, both of them have male ship preference thank you very much 💖

Age, Sexuality & Pronouns: 21, Biromantic Pansexual and Genderfluid, He/They (I'm a woman irl)

Appearance and Style (Aesthetic): 5'1.5", Messy brunette medium hair, Chubby, Southeast Asian, Feminine Tomboy, Soft Vintage or Soft Grunge (like Malia Tate's style from Teen Wolf) wearing K-beauty makeup

Sign & MBTI: INFJ, Libra-Scorpio cusp, Ravenclaw

Traits: 100% ambivert and anxious person with deep and complex mind who open up so easily and doesn't mind to be too vocal when I have to. May act respectful, modest, serious, and kind to strangers but very chaotic, young-at-heart, talkative, laid-back, snarky, sarcastic, clumsy, stubborn, hopeless romantic, and a procrastinator who swears a lot to people I'm close with. Very stressed mom friend plus acts like a baby in the group most of the time and a lazy big sis possessing anger issues and won't hesitate to hate someone if they say something bad to me or to my family or my friends. Also known to be unashamed to be true to myself, talented and artistic as well, hypersensitive, passionate, determined, and spunky to get what I want.

Likes: making OCs, arts, choir, poetry, karaoke, literature, history, makeup, beauty pageants, random conversations, variety of music (EDM, Kpop, and rock) expanding my knowledge in Christianity, documentaries (about saints), reading interesting stuffs, cooking, talking about social issues, and creative writing, chilling both indoors and outdoors

Hope you like them!

Ships under cut~

Shadow and Bone:

I ship you with Jesper!

I think Jesper would be drawn to your mixture of chaotic kindness, and your wide-variety of interests.

Runner Up: My initial thought was actually Nina, but since you wanted a male ship, Jesper was an equal choice.

Headcanons:

You and Jesper enjoy nights out doing karaoke, and you often drag along Nina and Inej. Nina will sing, Inej will not. You and Jesper have such good vibes that everyone always enjoys when you come to the bars/clubs, etc.

Jesper was your best friend before you began dating, it was a classic Best-Friends to Lovers evolution.

You were inseparable, and had feelings for each other for a long time, but thought it was one sided until Jesper asked why you were never in any relationships. He saw your avoidance of the question, and began to wonder if you felt the same. He drug the truth out of you, and that was the beginning.

Jesper knows you are hypersensitive, and whenever you start to feel overwhelmed or start to get sensory overload, he will immedietely help you out of the situation. He is very caring and protective of you.

You share similar tastes in music, though you had to warm him up to KPOP originally. So it is often that outsiders will hear music coming from your shared room. As you like to listen to music together, often singing and dancing around.

--------------------------

Merlin:

I ship you with Lancelot

I think Lancelot would be very fond of your diverse personality and interests. He would find you super interesting and would be drawn to you.

Runner Up: Merlin.

---

'Fake Dating'

You and Lancelot made your way into the tavern, hoping they had a spare room for you to sleep in. You were both wary, and exhausted after your long journey. It did not help that you were in a place known to not take kindly of those from Camelot.

"How can I help you two?" The bartender asked, his eyes raking over both of you.

You could feel the eyes of other watching you as well.

"Hello" Lancelot smiled "We were wondering if you had any rooms available for the night?"

"We only have one, but it's for newlyweds."

You felt your heart sink a bit, but it quickly jolted with energy when Lancelot next spoke.

"Oh that's perfect then! Me and my partner here have only recently gotten married!"

You smiled at the bartender and nodded your head, glad your hands were hidden with gloves, so they could not test your lie.

"Where about's are you two from?" The man asked, clearly not too certain of the two of you.

"Weyfield." You both said at the same time, naming a small village far from Camelot and your current location.

The man nodded before reaching under the counter and pulling out a key. Handing it over, he smiled, though it did not quite reach his eyes "Congratulations."

"Thanks." You both said before quickly leaving to go find your room.

As you made it to the stairwell, you spoke in a low tone. "So we're married now? Moving a bit fast aren't we?"

Lancelot smiled before he looked over at you "Might be a good time to test the waters."

You hesitated for a moment as he continued to walk. Your heart was beating quickly as your ears burned hot. His words repeated in your head as you continued to follow him.

'Test the waters'. Did that mean he had feelings for you as well?

The thought would not leave your mind as you got closer to your room. As you approached, the sudden thought invaded your mind. 'There's going to be only one bed.'

xx

[studyvibes]

Hello guys so I thought it would be nice to translate an interview with Maneskin which is originally in Russian.

Thank you @teatrodellavita for sending me the link for the interview ❤️

So to warn you all before you read the translated interview, this is translation everything from Russian to English so all the maneskin answers were basically translated x2 (Italian -> Russian -> English) so there might be some Chinese whisper/telephone effect. Also I struggle with Russian idioms/metaphors so I’ll note them if they are during the interview.

I’ll leave the link here so you can follow the time stamps all of the questions. Also I tried my best making a nice structure which was hard because this whole post was written on tumblr mobile app

https://youtu.be/16NIbGDcycI

(I’ll be writing in personal notes to explain some parts in italic and bold)

So the video starts with the host making a parody of 80s Italy video promoting a vinyl. I am not sure, correct me if I am wrong, but I think that’s a reference to their New Years special episode. I skipped parts of the host talking because I don’t see it relevant to the Maneskin interview. Also I’d like to note that if you want to compare the host he is similar in hosting style like Jimmy Kimmel, he trying to ask questions with a bit of humour

[2:02] Host: Our guest, the winners of Eurovision: Maneskin!!!

[2:08] Maneskin performing I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE

[4:59] Host: Maneskin!!! *clapping*

Damiano: Thank you

Host: Thank you! Grazie! (Says other random Italian phrases, which I don’t know how to spell)

[5:21] Host: I was informed that on Yandex Music in our country (YandexMusic is a streaming service) you became more popular than Billie Eilish. You are the most popular band/group in the country based on streaming your music.

Host: Tell me how do you feel about Billie Eilish? Are you happy that you surpassed quiet singing woman from America (he didn’t mean it in harsh way more like a joke way)

Victoria: Poor Billie

Damiano: We really like her. There isn’t any competition with her, it’s not that important. But we are happy that our audience is here.

*audience clapping*

[5:55] Host: (said something that I couldn’t hear because of the clapping)

Host: You know, thanks to you we noticed how much in TV and Russia we see rarer and rarer people come/visit in leather and lace

*audience laugh in the background*

Host: And honestly speaking, looking at you we realize how much we miss it, we lack it, you have very very beautiful costumes/outfits

Damiano: thank you very much

Host: it just lacking blue and then a bit we’ll have a russian flag

*audience laugh*

[6:31] Host: what are your thoughts/feelings of Russia? What are your thoughts/feelings of meeting your fans? Where did you go? You are already a couple of days here, what did you like?

Damiano: Very pretty. It is very rare when we could go for walk, we saw the Red Square. The public is very warm so we appreciate/it’s very nice.

Victoria/Damiano (Not sure if this translated part was from Victoria or Damiano): We received a lot of Vodka as gifts

Ethan: and chocolate

Host: In this country you are the first people to receive vodka as a gift. (I think it’s sarcasm because I know a lot of people who received vodka as a visitor/ gifted vodka for visitors)

*audience laughs*

Host: but it’s ok, maybe it’ll become a tradition.

[7:04] Host: Tell me, a bit, for all of us who know you after the Eurovision. How was the band created? Who first joined the band. Am I right that Thomas, Victoria, you *pointing Thomas and Victoria* you first then Damiano joined? Tell us

Thomas: We went to the same school, and during that time we met each other. Then Damiano joined our band and then we made the band. A lot of different people came to us - we were looking for a soloist and drummer

Victoria: and during that time Damiano joined us.

Victoria:We choose Damiano because he was the only who could actually sing

Thomas: and then later Ethan joined the band. We found him *pointing at Ethan* on Facebook

Host: So you wrote something that you are looking for a drummer right? How did it happen? What did you write, what to write so I can join you as the 5th member with accordion

*audience laughing*

Ethan: Accordion is a bit difficult instrument *audience laughing* to use in rock music, but you can send us your resume, we will look at it.

[8:35] Host: We have a question from our band called ‘фрукты (Fruits)’ which is performing already 10 years. So the question is: you, just like the band Fruits, started from street performing, right? Like outside nearly at the streets of Via de Corso in Rome?

Damiano: Yes

Host: When you performed outside did you already wear the same costumes/outfits? How much as an estimate did you earn a day? It’s very interesting, a lot of bands will travel to that street, to repeat your journey.

Victoria: We dressed worse

Damiano: We dressed the style of hippie, but we earned a bit of money. One time, one boy came up and dropped for us 20 euros. It didn’t matter on the day, and one time a guy/young man came up and dropped 50 euros in to our box.

*Host pointing at himself proudly, audience laughing*

Victoria: So it was you!

Host: Oofcourse

Victoria: We thought we saw your face somewhere before.

*audience laughing*

Host: Of course guys, I left the boutique and thought hmmm what do I do with useless money, ofcourse.

[9:50] Host: Also about the band Fruits I just can’t not say it, Damiano, when you turn to your profile, *asking camera men to move the camera close up to the soloist of the band Fruits* *we see her side profile* I think during your childhood you both were separated, you look so alike. Damiano, maybe you have relatives in this country.

Damiano: *Damiano laughs*

Damiano: Maybe

*continues laughing*

Host: maybe, maybe

Damiano: It is possible, my dad was in Russia. *Damiano starts to laugh more, audience and laughing and clapping, camera goes on the soloist of the band Fruits smiling looking shy/embarrassed*

Host: She has the exact same story, her mother was visiting Italy

[10:23] Host: I can’t stop talking about your costumes/outfits (positively). And that you returned us faith/hope in Italian music in our country, which we really really love here, but also faith/hope in rock music. You are a group which uses more than one guitar and doesn’t used a drum machine and suddenly became very popular that we grateful for you because the word rock appeared and returned thanks to you.

Host:It is clear that you love rock music which is now considered the past rock and know the history of rock music. If you were offered to be able to go to a concert from the past, from any band, where would you want to go? Each one of you

Damiano: maybe the performance of Queen, would’ve been fun to see

Host: Victoria, which band and which performance?

Victoria: hmmm...possibly David Bowie, his tour.

Host: Ethan?

Ethan: If it was possible to return in the past, I would’ve traveled to the Woodstock

Victoria: he has has there contacts/ connections

*Damiano imitates smoking and laughs*

Host: oh I can’t repeat that after you

Host: and Thomas?

Thomas: I would go to the 70s for Jimi Hendrix

[12:00] Host: Where do you buy your clothes? Like from the basics, so I arrive to Rome and I have more than 50 euros, thank god, and I want to buy clothes. Where do I buy the clothes?

Maneskin (I wasn’t sure who’s comment the translator translated): just in the stores

*audience laughing*

Damiano: There is nothing funny *Damiano smiling* It’s true *He starts laughing*

Host: I’ll be honest I haven’t been in Rome for a very long time. But it’s in vintage stores right?

*Maneskin agreeing*

[12:30] Host: I have a very important moment, it is that you for the first time..mm.. finally brought back what we all missed and exactly that is bright and beautiful, outlined dignity male makeup on stage. Speaking of this..... talking veryyy slow so they can translate them quickly... speaking of this, I have a small favour/request ... *he kinda goes of track for a second* who does the make up, do you do it yourself?

Maneskin: no no

Damiano: no we have makeup artists, actually one makeup artist, very talented, well done. Between all of us, Victoria is best as makeup.

Host: Yeah, but with Victoria it’s understandable, it’s clear that she start trying makeup sooner than you did.

Host: I have an offer, imagine you don’t have your makeup artist and you have a person who urgently needs makeup applied. I would like to ask if you, Damiano, and the member could apply the makeup on my face? I honestly don’t know what you need to apply to makeup *he is opening palettes of makeup*

*Damiano stands up walking towards the host

Host: (in English) Thomas if you wanna, you know help, please.

*Thomas joins Damiano*

Host:(back in Russian) Victoria you can hint them

Translator: She (Victoria) said that you (Host) choose the wrong helpers

*audience laughs*

Host: Yeah? Then come join

*Victoria and Ethan join*

(Ok here it goes messy cause they are all talking and the translator instantly translates so I might have mixed up)

*Victoria points at some makeup product (can’t see which one)*

Host: This one?! Victoria...

Damiano: wait, I’ll go first, first add a bit of eyeliner

*Damiano applies eyeliner under the eye of the host*

Victoria: you started under the eye, you should’ve started from the top

Host: *joking* I’ll also always start with this line

*Victoria smiling shakes her head, audience laughing*

Damiano: Its the type of makeup you wear when you go grocery shopping

*Audience is laughing, host tries not to laugh while Damiano is applying eyeliner on him*

Host: I was actually planning to go grocery shopping

*Thomas and Victoria start applying eyeshadow on different parts of hosts face*

Host: Sto-wha- already other parts being applied?

*Audience laughing*

Host: Ok guys... but..

Host: Ethan is it ok? Your the only one I can trust in this group

Support host in the background: he’ll need to be returning home (as a joke implying he needs to look decent when he leaves the studio)

*Victoria applies makeup on the host lips*

Host: Also lips?! Hmmm

Ethan: you look good

Damiano: close your eyes *applies upper eyeliner*

Damiano: (in English) I don’t know what I am doing

Host: (in Russian) you don’t know what you are doing? No, that’s too late to tell me.

Damiano: (in English) that’s why we have a makeup artist

Host: (in Russian) no, wait, now your make up artist will say why am I even needed by this band.

Ethan: just a final touch *applies eyeshadow on the tip of the hosts nose, and walks away with two thumbs up*

*host laughs and then picks up mirror to look at the work*

Host: not bad guys, to be honest, not bad.

Damiano: (in Italian) No it’s true, look how pretty he is, very pretty

Host: guys I want to tell you one thing: never fire your make up artist

*audience laughing*

Host: Thank you for your visit and we are very grateful for your performance

Host: And what can I say, we are waiting here and with the whole company will to you concert. Grazie mille

————————————

Ooooooff that took wayyyy longer I planned, it was hard because I had to relisten some parts to know who actually said, like it is easier when it’s only one person cause I get to translate quicker.

Anyways, hope you all enjoyed this translation, if you have any maneskin interviews in Russian or German (warning: my German is a bit ruff from lack of practicing) which you would like me to translate, message me :)

[tcm]

Reframing Films of the Past: An Interview with TCM Writers

All month long in March, TCM will be taking a look at a number of beloved classic films that have stood the test of time, but when viewed by contemporary standards, certain aspects of these films are troubling and problematic. During TCM’s Reframed: Classics in the Rearview Mirror programming, all five TCM hosts will appear on the network to discuss these issues, their historical and cultural context and how we can keep the legacy of great films alive for future generations.

Also joining in on this conversation are four TCM writers who were open enough to share their thoughts on their love of classic movies and watching troubling images of the past. Special thanks to Theresa Brown, Constance Cherise, Susan King and Kim Luperi for taking part in this conversation. Continue the conversation over on TCM’s Twitter.

What do you say to people who don’t like classics because they’re racist and sexist? 

KL: There are positive representations in classic Hollywood that I think would blow some peoples’ minds. I always love introducing people to new titles that challenge expectations. 

That said, anyone who broadly slaps a sexist or racist label on a large part of the medium’s history does a disservice to cinema and themselves. That mindset keeps them ignorant not only of some excellent movies and groundbreaking innovation but history itself. 

I think people need to remember that movies are a product of their time and they can reflect the society they were made into a variety of degrees - good, bad, politically, culturally, socially. That’s not to excuse racism or sexism; it needs to be recognized and called out as such for us to contend with it today. But it’s important for people who say they don’t like classics for those reasons to understand the historical context. In particular, we need to acknowledge that society has evolved - and what was deemed socially acceptable at times has, too, even if sexism and racism are always wrong - and we are applying a modern lens to these films that come with the benefit of decades worth of activism, growth and education.

SK: I totally agree K.L. For years I have been encouraging people to watch vintage movies who keep proclaiming they don’t like black-and-white films or silent films. For every Birth of a Nation (1915) there are beautiful dramas, wonderful comedies and delicious mysteries and film noirs. 

 These films that have racist and sexist elements shouldn’t be collectively swept under the rug, because as K.L. stated they shine a light on what society was like – both good and bad. 

CC: First off, fellow writers may I say, I think your work is amazing. I'm continually learning from the talent that is here, and I am humbled to be a part of this particular company. Similar to the prior answers, for every racist/sexist film the opposite exists. Personally, classic musicals attracted me due to their visual assault, creativity and their unmistakable triple-threat performances. While we cannot ignore racist stereotypes and sexism, there are films that simply are "fantasies of art." There is also a review of evolution. In 20 years, what we now deem as acceptable behavior/conversation will be thought of as outdated and will also require being put into "historical context."  What we collectively said/thought/did 20 years ago, we are currently either re-adjusting or reckoning with now, and that is a truth of life that will never change. We will always evolve.

TB: I would say to them they should consider the times the movie was made in. It was a whole different mindset back then. 

Are there movies that you love but are hesitant to recommend to others because of problematic elements in them? If so, which movies? 

TB: Yes, there are movies I’m hesitant to recommend. The big one, off the top of my head, would be Gone With the Wind (1939). The whole slavery thing is a bit of a sticky wicket for people, especially Black folks. Me, I love the movie. It is truly a monumental feat of filmmaking for 1939. I’m not saying I’m happy with the depiction of African Americans in that film. I recognize the issues. But when I look at a classic film, I suppose I find I have to compartmentalize things. I tend to gravitate on the humanity of a character I can relate to. 

KL: Synthetic Sin (1929), a long thought lost film, was found in the 2010s, and I saw it at Cinecon a few years ago. As a Colleen Moore fan, I thoroughly enjoyed most of it, but it contains a scene of her performing in blackface that doesn’t add anything to the plot. That decision brings the movie down in my memory, which is why I have trouble recommending it.

Also Smarty (1934), starring Warren William and Joan Blondell, is another movie I don’t recommend because it’s basically about spousal abuse played for comedy, and it did not age well for that reason.

SK: Breakfast at Tiffany’s (1961): Audrey Hepburn is my favorite actress and I love her Oscar-nominated performance as Holly. I adore Orangy as Cat, as well as George Peppard and Buddy Ebsen, who is wonderfully endearing. And of course, “Moon River” makes me cry whenever I hear it. But then I cringe and am practically nauseous every time Mickey Rooney pops up on screen with his disgusting stereotypical performance as Holly’s Japanese landlord Mr. Yunioshi. What was director Blake Edwards thinking casting him in this part? Perhaps because he’s such a caricature no Japanese actor wanted to play him, so he cast Rooney with whom he had worked within the 1950s. 

CC: I cannot necessarily state that I am in "love," but, a film that comes to mind would be Anna and the King of Siam (1946). It is an absolutely beautiful visual film. However, Rex Harrison as King Mongkut requires some explanation. 

Holiday Inn (1942), and the Abraham number...why??? Might I also add, there were many jaw-dropping, racist cartoons.

How did you learn to deal with the negative images of the past? 

KL: I often look at it as a learning experience. Negative images can provoke much-needed conversation (internally or with others) and for me, they often prompt my education in an area that I wasn’t well versed in. For instance, blackface is featured in some classic films, and its history is something I never knew much about. That said, seeing its use in movies prompted me to do some research, which led me first to TCM’s short documentary about blackface and Hollywood. I love how TCM strives to provide context and seeks to educate viewers on uncomfortable, contentious subjects so we can appreciate classic films while still acknowledging and understanding the history and the harmful stereotypes some perpetuated.

SK: It’s also been a learning experience for me. Though I started watching movies as a little girl in the late 1950s, thanks to TCM and Warner Archive I realized that a lot of films were taken out of circulation because of racist elements. TCM has not only screened a lot of these films but they have accompanied the movies with conversations exploring the stereotypes in the films.  

CC: As a Black woman, negative images of the past continue to be a lesson on how Blacks, as well as other minorities, were seen (and in some cases still are seen) through an accepted mainstream American lens. On one hand, it's true, during the depiction of these films the majority of Black Americans were truly relegated to servant roles, so it stands to reason that depictions of Black America would be within the same vein. What is triggering to me, are demeaning roles, and the constant exaggeration of the slow-minded stereotype, blackface. When you look at the glass ceiling that minority performers faced from those in power, the need for suppression and domination is transparent because art can be a powerful agent of change. I dealt with the negative images of the past by knowing and understanding that the depiction being given to me was someone else's narrative, of who they thought I was, not who I actually am.

TB: I’m not sure HOW I learned to deal with negative images. Again, I think it might go back to me compartmentalizing.

I don’t know if this is right or wrong…but I’ve always found myself identifying with the leads and their struggles. As a human being, I can certainly identify with losing a romantic partner, money troubles, losing a job…no matter the ethnicity.

In what ways have we evolved from the movies of the classic era?

KL: I think we are more socially and culturally conscious now when it comes to stories, diversity and representation on screen and behind the scenes, which is a step forward. That said, while there's been growth, there's still much work to be done.

SK: I think this year’s crop of awards contenders show how things have evolved with Da 5 Bloods, Soul, One Night in Miami, Minari, Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom, The United States Vs. Billie Holiday, Judas and the Black Messiah and MLK/FBI. 

But we still have a long way to go. I’d love to see more Native American representation in feature films; more Asian-American and Latino stories. 

CC: There are minority artists, writers, producers, directors, actors with the increasing capacity to create through their own authentic voice, thereby affecting the world, and a measurable amount of them are women! Generally speaking, filmmakers (usually male) have held the voice of the minority narrative as well as the female narrative. I agree with both writers above in the thought that it is progress, and I also agree, more stories of diversified races are needed. 

TB: One important way we've evolved from the movies made in the classic era by being more inclusive in casting. 

Are there any deal-breakers for you when watching a movie, regardless of the era, that make it hard to watch? 

KL: Physical violence in romantic relationships that's played as comedy is pretty much a dealbreaker for me. I mentioned above that I don't recommend Smarty (1934) to people, because when I finally watched it recently, it. was. tough. The way their abuse was painted as part of their relationship just didn’t sit well with me.

SK: Extreme racist elements and just as KL states physical violence. 

Regarding extreme racist elements, D.W. Griffith’s Birth of a Nation (1915) is just too horrific to watch. I was sickened when I saw it when I was in grad school at USC 44 years ago and it’s only gotten worse. And then there’s also Wonder Bar (1934), the pre-code Al Jolson movie that features the Busby Berkeley black minstrel number “Goin’ to Heaven on a Mule.” Disgusting.

I also agree with KL about physical violence in comedies and even dramas. I recently revisited Private Lives (1931) with Norma Shearer and Robert Montgomery based on Noel Coward’s hit play. I have fond memories of seeing Maggie Smith in person in the play when I was 20 in the play and less than fond memories of watching Joan Collins destroying Coward’s bon mots.  

But watching the movie again, you realized just how physically violent Amanda and Elyot’s relationship is-they are always talking about committing physical violence-”we were like two violent acids bubbling about in a nasty little matrimonial battle”; “certain women should be struck regularly, like gongs”-or constantly screaming and throwing things.  

There is nothing funny or romantic about this.

KL: I try to put Birth of a Nation out of my mind, but S.K. did remind me of it again, and movies featuring extreme racism at their core like that are also dealbreakers; I totally agree with her assessment. I understand the technological achievements, but I think in the long run, especially in how it helped revive the KKK, the social harm that film brought about outdoes its cinematic innovations.

CC: Like S.K., Wonder Bar immediately came to mind. Excessive acts of violence, such as in the film Natural Born Killers (1994). I walked out of the theatre while the film was still playing. I expected violence, but the gratuitousness was just too much for me. I also have an issue with physical abuse, towards women and children. This is not to say I would not feel the same way about a man. However, when males are involved, it tends to be a fight, an exchange of physical energy, generally speaking, when we see physical abuse it is perpetuated towards women and children.

TB: I have a couple of moments that pinch my heart when I watch a movie. It doesn’t mean I won’t watch the movie. It just means I roll my eyes…verrrrry hard.

-Blackface…that’s a little rough; especially when the time period OF the movie is the ‘30s or ‘40s film.

-Not giving the Black actors a real name to be called by in the film (Snowflake…Belvedere…Lightnin’). I mean, can’t they have a regular name like Debbie or Bob?

-When the actor can’t do the simplest of tasks, i.e. Butterfly McQueen answering the phone in Mildred Pierce (1945) and not knowing which end to speak into. What up with that?

Are there elements they got right that we still haven’t caught up to? 

KL: I don't know if the pre-Code era got sex right (and sensationalism was definitely something studios were going for) but in some ways, I feel that subject was treated as somewhat more accepted and natural back then. Of course, what was shown onscreen in the classic era was nowhere near the extent it is today, but the way the Production Code put a lid on sex (in addition to many other factors) once again made it into more of a taboo topic than it is or should be.

One thing I particularly hate in modern movies is gratuitous violence, and it perplexes and angers me how America weighs violence vs. sex in general through the modern ratings system: films are more likely to get a pass with violence, mostly landing in PG-13 territory and thus making them more socially acceptable, while sex, something natural, is shunned with strictly R ratings. Obviously, there are limits for both, but I think the general thinking there is backwards today.

CC: The elegance, the sophistication, the precision, the dialogue, the intelligence, the wit. The fashion! The layering of craftsmanship. We aren't fans of these films for fleeting reasons, we are fans because of their timeless qualities.

I'm going to sound like a sentimental sap here, ladies get ready. I think they got the institution of family right. Yes, I do lean towards MGM films, so I am coloring my opinion from that perspective. Even if a person hasn't experienced what would have been considered a "traditional family" there is something to be said about witnessing that example. Perhaps not so much of a father and a mother, but to witness a balanced, functioning, loving relationship. What it "looks like" when a father/mother/brother/sister etc. genuinely loves another family member.

I was part of the latch-key generation, and although my parents remained together, many of my friends' parents were divorced. Most won't admit it, but by the reaction to the documentary [Won't You Be My Neighbor?, 2018], the bulk of them went home, sat in front of the TV and watched Mr. Rogers tell them how special they were because their parents certainly were not. We don't know what can "be" unless we see it.

[theshedding]

Lil Nas X: Country Music, Christianity & Reclaiming HELL

I don’t typically bother myself to follow what Lil Nas X is doing from day to day, or even month to month but I do know that his “Old Town Road” hit became one of the biggest selling/streamed records in Country Music Business history (by a Black Country & Queer artist). “Black” is key because for 75+ years Country music has unsuspiciously evolved into a solidly White-identified genre (despite mixed and Indian & Black roots). Regrettably, Country music is also widely known for anti-black, misogynoir, reliably homophobic (Trans isn’t really a conversation yet), Christian and Hard Right sentiments on the political spectrum. Some other day I will venture into more; there is a whole analysis dying to be done on this exclusive practice in the music industry with its implications on ‘access’ to equity and opportunity for both Black/POC’s and Whites artists/songwriters alike. More commentary on this rigid homogeneous field is needed and how it prohibits certain talent(s) for the sake of perpetuating homogeneity (e.g. “social determinants” of diversity & viable artistic careers). I’ll refrain from discussing that fully here, though suffice it to say that for those reasons X’s “Old Town Road” was monumental and vindicating. 

As for Lil Nas X, I’m not particularly a big fan of his music; but I see him, what he’s doing, his impact on music + culture and I celebrate him using these moments to affirm his Black, Queer self, and lifting up others. Believe it or not, even in the 2020′s, being “out” in the music business is still a costly choice. As an artist it remains much easier to just “play straight”. And despite appearances, the business (particularly Country) has been dragged kicking and screaming into developing, promoting and advancing openly-affirming LGBTQ 🏳️‍🌈 artists in the board room or on-stage. Though things are ‘better’ we have not yet arrived at a place of equity or opportunity for queer artists; for the road of music biz history is littered with stunted careers, bodies and limitations on artists who had no option but to follow conventional ways, fail or never be heard of in the first place. With few exceptions, record labels, radio and press/media have successfully used fear, intimidation, innuendo and coercion to dilute, downplay or erase any hint of queer identity from its performers. This was true even for obvious talents like Little Richard.

(Note: I’m particularly speaking of artists in this regard, not so much the hairstylists, make-up artists, PA’s, etc.)

_____

Which is why...in regard to Lil Nas X, whether you like, hate or love his music, the young brother is a trailblazer. His very existence protests (at least) decades of inequity, oppression and erasure. X aptly critiques a Neo-Christian Fascist Heteropatriarchy; not just in American society but throughout the Music Business and with Black people. That is no small deal. His unapologetic outness holds a mirror up to Christianity at-large, as an institution, theology and practice. The problem is they just don’t like what they see in that mirror.

In actuality, “Call Me By Your Name”, Lil Nas X’s new video, is a twist on classic mythology and religious memes that are less reprehensible or vulgar than the Biblical narratives most of us grew up on vís-a-vís indoctrinating smiles of Sunday school teachers and family prior to the “age of reason”. Think about the narratives blithely describing Satan’s friendly wager with God regarding Job (42:1-6); the horrific “prophecies” in St. John’s Book of Revelation (i.e. skies will rain fire, angels will spit swords, mankind will be forced to retreat into caves for shelter, and we will be harassed by at least three terrifying dragons and beasts. Angels will sound seven trumpets of warning, and later on, seven plagues will be dumped on the world), or Jesus’s own clarifying words of violent intent in Matthew (re: “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.” 10:34). Whether literal or metaphor, these age old stories pale in comparison to a three minute allegorical rap video. Conservatives: say what you will, I’m pretty confident X doesn’t take himself as seriously as “The true and living God” from the book of Job.

A little known fact as it is, people have debunked the story and evolution of Satan and already offered compelling research showing [he] is more of a literary device than an actual entity or “spirit” (Spoiler: In the Bible, Satan does not take shape as an actual “bad” person until the New Testament). In fact, modern Christianity’s impression of the “Devil” is shaped by conflating Hellenized mythology with a literary tradition rooted in Dante’s Inferno and accompanying spooks and superstitions going back thousands of years. Whether Catholic, Protestant, Mormon, Scientologist, Atheist or Agnostic, we’ve spent a lifetime with these predominant icons and clichés. (Resource: Prof. Bart D. Erhman, “Heaven & Hell”).

So Here’s THE PROBLEM: The current level of fear and outrage is: 

(1) Unjust, imposing and irrational. 

(2) Disproportionate when taken into account a lifetime of harmful Christian propaganda, anti-gay preaching and political advocacy.

(3) Historically inaccurate concerning the existence of “Hell” and who should be scared of going there. 

Think I’m overreacting? 

Examples: 

Institutionalized Homophobia (rhetoric + policy)

Anti-Gay Ministers In Life And Death: Bishop Eddie Long And Rev. Bernice King

Black, gay and Christian, Marylanders struggle with Conflicts

Harlem pastor: 'Obama has released the homo demons on the black man'

Joel Olsteen: Homosexuality is “Not God’s Best”

Bishop Brandon Porter: Gays “Perverted & Lost...The Church of God in Christ Convocation appears like a ‘coming out party’ for members of the gay community.”

Kim Burrell: “That perverted homosexual spirit is a spirit of delusion & confusion and has deceived many men & women, and it has caused a strain on the body of Christ”

Falwell Suggests Gays to Blame for 9-11 Attacks

Pope Francis Blames The Devil For Sexual Abuse By Catholic Church

Pope Francis: Gay People Not Welcome in Clergy

Pope Francis Blames The Devil For Sexual Abuse By Catholic Church

The Pope and Gay People: Nothing’s Changed

The Catholic church silently lobbied against a suicide prevention hotline in the US because it included LGBT resources

Mormon church prohibits Children of LGBT parents to be baptized

Catholic Charity Ends Adoptions Rather Than Place Kid With Same-Sex Couple

I Was a Religious Zealot That Hurt People-Coming Out as Gay: A Former Conversion Therapy Leader Is Apologizing to the LGBTQ Community

The above short list chronicles a consistent, literal, demonization of LGBTQ people, contempt for their gender presentation, objectification of their bodies/sexuality and a coordinated pollution of media and culture over the last 50+ years by clergy since integration and Civil Rights legislation. Basically terrorism. Popes, Bishops, Pastors, Evangelists, Politicians, Television hosts, US Presidents, Camp Leaders, Teachers, Singers & Entertainers, Coaches, Athletes and Christians of all types all around the world have confused and confounded these issues, suppressed dissent, and confidently lied about LGBT people-including fellow Queer Christians with impunity for generations (i.e. “thou shall not bear false witness against they neighbor” Ex. 23:1-3). Christian majority viewpoints about “laws” and “nature” have run the table in discussions about LGBTQ people in society-so much that we collectively must first consider their religious views in all discussions and the specter of Christian approval -at best or Christian condescension -at worst. That is Christian (and straight) privilege. People are tired of this undue deference to religious opinions. 

That is what is so deliciously bothersome about Lil Nas X being loud, proud and “in your face” about his sexuality. If for just a moment, he not only disrupts the American hetero-patriarchy but specifically the Black hetero-patriarchy, the so-called “Black Church Industrial Complex”, Neo-Christian Fascism and a mostly uneducated (and/or miseducated) public concerning Ancient Near East and European history, superstitions-and (by extension) White Supremacy. To round up: people are losing their minds because the victim decided to speak out against his victimizer. 

Additionally, on some level I believe people are mad at him being just twenty years old, out and FREE as a self-assured, affirming & affirmed QUEER Black male entertainer with money and fame in the PRIME of his life. We’ve never, or rarely, seen that before in a Black man in the music business and popular culture. But that’s just too bad for them. With my own eyes I’ve watched straight people, friends, Christians, enjoy their sexuality from their elementary youth to adolescence, up and through college and later marriages, often times independently of their spouses (repeatedly). Meanwhile Queer/Gay/SGL/LGBTQ people are expected to put their lives on hold while the ‘blessed’ straight people run around exploring premarital/post-marital/extra-marital sex, love and affection, unbound & un-convicted by their “sin” or God...only to proudly rebrand themselves later in life as a good, moral “wholesome Christian” via the ‘sacred’ institution of marriage with no questions asked. 

Inequality defined.

For Lil Nas X, everything about the society we've created for him in the last 100+ years (re: links above) has explicitly been designed for his life not to be his own. According to these and other Christians (see above), his identity is essentially supposed to be an endless rat fuck of internal confusion, suicide-ideation, depression, long-suffering, faux masculinity, heterosexism, groveling towards heaven, respectability politics, failed prayer and supplication to a heteronormative earthly and celestial hierarchy unbothered in affording LGBT people like him a healthy, sane human development. It’s almost as if the Conservative establishment (Black included) needs Lil Nas X to be like others before him: “private”, mysteriously single, suicidal, suspiciously straight or worse, dead of HIV/AIDS ...anything but driving down the street enjoying his youth as a Black Queer artist and man. So they mad about that?

Well those days are over.  

-Rogiérs is a writer, international recording artist, performer and indie label manager with 25+ years in the music industry. He also directs Black Nonbelievers of DC, a non-profit org affiliated with the AHA supporting Black skeptics, Atheists, Agnostics & Humanists. He holds a B.A. in Music Business & Mgmt and a M.A. in Global Entertainment & Music Business from Berklee College of Music and Berklee Valencia, Spain. www.FibbyMusic.net Twitter/IG: @Rogiers1

[jalapeno-princess]

Treat You Better

Mark Tuan X Reader

Genre: Angst with a bunch of terribly written smut ahaha idk why I keep trying to write smut I can’t write smut to save my life

Word Count: 12.6k

Warning: Intended for 18+ audience; cheating, degradation, riding, oral (both male and female receiving) face fucking, doggy style

Summary: Mark was at the club with a few of his friends when he spots you walking in all alone. Knowing the kind of person you were, Mark was well aware that you hated the night life. You were the definition of homebody and you weren’t a fan of clubs or bars which made Mark confused seeing you making your way in to the dimly lit establishment. Not wanting anyone to take advantage of you. he finds himself walking towards you with the intentions of making sure you were safe. He then finds out that you were there to find someone to get revenge on your boyfriend Jackson with. As much as you hated the idea of one night stands and sleeping with strangers, all your rationality was thrown out the window as soon as you found out Jackson had been cheating on you with his receptionist. What started off as an innocent little dance with Mark turned in to riding him in the back seat of his car and it’s in that moment of lust that you find out Mark’s true feelings for you.

A/N: Hey guys! I’m back at it again with an extremely rushed story and I’m not too sure when I’ll have the time to write again but I hope you enjoy this story. It’s based on a song called “Soliá” by Bad Bunny which means “Used to” in Spanish. I’ve been getting in to his music a lot these days and even if I don’t speak a word of Spanish, I love each and every one of his songs (they’re actually almost all about sex hahahaha) but he’s an amazing artist and I love how he speaks out for those who can’t use their voices. If you have a chance, definitely go check him out he’s awesome and so is this song.

She arrived alone, she went out without her friends Revealed, in alcohol looking for a way out From that fake relationship Baby, I saw how you look at me I repeat it to you in case you forget it Send him a message that says To not leave you alone Because he could lose you If one day he sees you again From me, tell him to not leave you alone Because he could lose you If one day he sees you again

Mark was quick to turn his attention to you the minute you walked in to the club. Although it was extremely dark besides the strobe lights moving around, the music was blasting and almost every single person there was grinding upon one another, he couldn’t help but let his eyes wander to your curvaceous figure the minute Yugyeom pointed you out. 

He had to do a double take; when the younger boy nudged him and motioned towards the entrance he almost didn’t believe it was you. Everyone who knew you personally was aware of the fact that you hated bars and clubs and never understood why people would spend so much money on alcohol and having a bunch of sweaty bodies pressed up against you. 

Curiosity got the best of him; why exactly were you there and better yet, why were you alone? If anything, Mark would’ve expected you to be there with your group of friends; they were always out on Friday nights and Mark saw them every now and then but you never tagged along. Maybe they were already somewhere in the crowded room and you were going to meet them. 

There was a tiny voice in the back of his head, the one that cared about you more than he probably should that told him to go up to you and make sure you weren’t messed with by one of the drunk and visibly horny men. However, he knew not to get involved whenever it came to you. He knew that you’d never put yourself in a dangerous situation; but with the outfit you were wearing, a short, red dress that stopped right at the beginning of your thighs and hugged each and every one of your curves, he was sure you were going to be the star of the night. 

You looked extremely beautiful and Mark couldn’t find it in himself to take his eyes off of you. Your hair that was normally thrown up in a messy bun or neatly tied back in a ponytail was currently down in bouncy waves. Even from far away, he could tell that you were hardly wearing any make up and it was something he always admired about you. If he was being honest, there were many pretty girls in the club wearing outfits similar to yours and even more revealing in attempts to catch the attention of men. 

However, you didn’t even have to try to look as sexy as you did; it just came natural for you. From the moment you were introduced to one another, he noticed that you weren’t one to care about your looks or what you wore. You cared more about your job, your personality and your desire to help others rather than your appearance and what people thought about you. In his eyes, you were the most beautiful girl he’s ever met both on the inside and out. 

He wasn’t used to seeing you so dolled up. You were always so shy and modest. If you weren’t wearing your scrubs for work, you’d either be in jeans or sweats and even then, Mark would find himself staring at you in awe of your beauty. But seeing you with your breasts and ass on display for the first time since meeting you over two years ago was driving him insane. This is his favorite look on you so far. Before he could process what he was doing, he found himself walking towards you; he didn’t even feel the need to tell his friends where he was going. 

All he cared about in that moment was going up to you and finding out what you were doing there. The closer he got to you, he could feel his heart racing. This was a mistake; he couldn’t stop the gut feeling that you were upset with him and you had every right to be. Yet it didn’t stop him from tapping on your shoulder once he finally made it over to where you were standing. As soon as you turned around and a soft smile rose on your face, he released a breath of relief. He’s been beating himself up about the entire situation for the last couple of months. 

When he first found out that your boyfriend Jackson who just so happened to be one of his closest friends was cheating on you, he wanted nothing more than to find you and tell you the truth. Sure, they’ve been friends for over ten years and he’s only known you for two, but he knew cheating was wrong especially because you didn’t deserve it. Everyone and their mothers knew just how much you loved your boyfriend. You gave him everything and more on a silver platter. Whatever he needed, you got for him or did for him without complaining. Your sole purpose was to take care of him and make sure he was both happy and healthy. 

Mark was always envious of Jackson. Not only was his younger friend more outgoing and very friendly on top of being very muscular and athletically talented, but he had you. When Jackson first told their group of friends that he was in a relationship, none of them could believe it. Jackson was the definition of a fuckboy. All throughout high school and college, he was infamous for sleeping around with almost every girl in their grade. There was even a rumor that he hooked up with everyone on the cheerleading squad and although it wasn’t confirmed, Mark wouldn’t have been surprised to hear that it was true. Jackson was a crowd favorite; all the guys on campus wanted to be him and all the girls wanted to be with him. 

That’s why he couldn’t believe Jackson was ready to settle down and commit himself to one girl. The first day he met you stayed in the back of his mind for the last two years. He was quick to pick up on how soft spoken and introverted you were. Probably because he was exactly the same. It was obvious that you and Jackson were the complete opposite of each other and the longer Mark got to know you, the more he felt like you deserved better. 

In the beginning of your relationship, Jackson was such a gentleman. He was quite the romantic; took you on cute dates, bought you flowers, opened doors for you and always pulled out your chair. He was also very vocal to his friends about how much he loved you and how he thought you were the one. Never in a million years did any one of them think that Jackson was going to find someone that made him want to change his playboy ways, but you did and they still had a hard time understanding how. 

Unfortunately, temptation got the best of him once a new receptionist was hired at the company Jackson was working at. Being the overly friendly person he was, he’d start small talk every now and then with her, but then it grew in to more and one night he found himself fucking her up against the wall in one of the storage rooms. 

He knew it was wrong, and he never hated himself more than in that moment knowing that he cheated on you; the only person whose ever meant anything to him but he couldn’t find it in himself to stop. Nor did he want to break up with you no matter how much he knew you didn’t deserve it. Two months in to his affair, there was one night he went out with Mark, Jinyoung and Youngjae to a bar and he got a little too drunk. 

Only four shots in, he began going in to explicit detail about his little dalliance with the receptionist and it took every bone in Mark’s body not to jump across of the table and sock him in the face. How could he do that to you? He told the guys that he had no intentions on giving you up because you were the best thing that’s ever happened to him yet he talked about his coworker as if it was the most normal thing to do. As if there was nothing wrong with fucking someone behind your back. 

Jinyoung tried his best in keeping Mark calm; he was the only one that knew of Mark’s feelings for you. Mark knew it was wrong to develop feelings for his best friend’s girlfriend, but it was inevitable. You radiated such a bright and positive energy. Although you were always to yourself, even when you went out with their group of friends, Mark was one of the lucky ones who got to know how you really were. You were very passionate about your job; as hard as being a nurse was, you loved helping people in any way possible. 

He got to spend time with you every now and then if he went to Jackson’s place and since the two of you both worked at the hospital, you’d eat lunch together every so often and sometimes you hung out even without Jackson being there. It was in those moments; watching your eyes light up as you talked about your love for cake boss, seeing you practically stuff your face with ice cream and hearing on you talk on the phone with your mom that Mark found himself wishing that he could be more than just a friend. He wanted to be the lucky guy that loved you. 

Mark has never felt this way about anyone before and you weren’t even his to be fond over but here he was, mentally beating the shit out of Jackson and wanting nothing more than to rip that dress off of you. During one of your lunches together just a few weeks ago, you expressed to Mark that you felt as if there was another woman in Jackson’s life. 

First it started off when he started contacting you less and you understood that he was busy, but so were you and yet you made it your priority to make sure he was eating all his meals on time and getting enough sleep. Then came the excuses as to why you couldn’t hang out together and the cancellation of dates. You confirmed his infidelity when you were over at his place one day and found a thong in his hamper that obviously didn’t belong to you. When the first tear fell when you were explaining everything to him, Mark could physically feel his heart sink to his chest. 

The confession was at the tip of his tongue, but it wasn’t his place to tell you no matter how badly he wanted to. It had nothing to do with his loyalty to his younger friend, Mark was willing to drop his entire friendship with Jackson if it meant getting to be with you. But he didn’t think he should be the one to relay the devastating news, which is why he confronted Jackson and ended up giving him a black eye almost three days ago. They ended up getting in to a heated argument with Jackson confronting Mark about having feelings for you and Mark telling Jackson to let you go. 

Jaebeom and Yugyeom had to practically rip their older friend off of Jackson or they were sure he would’ve sent him to the hospital. Your boyfriend might have been more muscular, but Mark was physically stronger. For someone with such skinny arms, he could throw a punch. 

“Hey, what are you doing here? You’re not alone are you?” He was trying his best not to look at you up and down, especially because now that he was closer to you he had a better look at you and your breasts were ready to pop out of your dress. Jackson was an idiot for cheating on you. Not only were you breathtakingly beautiful and right now you looked lethal, but you had the biggest heart and Mark felt like you deserved the entire world and more. He wanted to be the one who got to experience your love. 

Jackson no longer deserved it; no longer deserved you and Mark didn’t care what happened between the two of them anymore, he was going to make sure you left Jackson for good. 

“I came here by myself actually. I really don’t know why you guys come here so often, this place is bullshit. But I think you and I both know why I’m here. I don’t see him here, he’s with her right now isn’t he?” Although you looked eerily calm, the words bitterly fell from your mouth and Mark could feel his chest tighten at the realization that you now knew of your boyfriend’s affair. 

“Y/n—“ you put your hand out in front of him and shook your head. You were there to get drunk and had every intention to end up in bed with someone later that night. If Mark were to say anything to try to defend Jackson or if he were to lie, you’d probably decide that you made a mistake in coming to the club and leave before the night could really start. You may have considered Mark a good friend, but you had a huge feeling he knew his friend was cheating on you and didn’t feel the need to inform you. His loyalty was with Jackson or so you had thought. 

“I’m here to have a good time and to find a reason to move on. Don’t worry about me Mark. I’ll be fine. I’m a grown woman, I can take care of myself.” 

When Jackson first asked you out over two years ago when he met you at one of his trips to the emergency room, he found himself falling for you faster than he’s ever done with any girl. There was something about you that was different; that stood out from all his one night stands and flings that never lasted longer than a month. To your surprise, you had a few friends that knew who he was and they informed you of what he was like; how much of a womanizer he was and how he never dated anybody. 

You told yourself you didn’t want to get involved with him and that you wouldn’t allow someone like Jackson to take advantage with you, but being the kindhearted person you were who tried so hard to see the good in people, you allowed him to take you on a date which led to many more throughout the course of your relationship. Jackson both told you and showed you with his actions just how much he loved you and loved being with you. You were excited knowing that out of all the girls he’s been connected to, that you were the one who ended up changing his ways and that you were the first girl he’s ever been in love with. 

Everything seemed to be going so well in your relationship and you couldn’t be happier. However, as soon as he began growing distant towards you, you couldn’t help but feel like there was a reason behind it. 

Hearing that you were there alone worried Mark; especially because he saw the way a lot of the men in the club were looking at you with so much lust and fervor in their eyes. He wasn’t a mind reader, but he knew a lot of the guys probably had the same idea in mind and he cringed at the thought of someone taking advantage of you. You were extremely vulnerable in that moment and for you to come to the conclusion that you wanted to go to the club with the intention of letting one of these disgusting and undeserving men get to take you home later on made his skin crawl. Which is why he didn’t find it surprising when he began following you to the bar with every intention of keeping an eye on you. 

“Mark, I said I can handle myself—“ the glare he sent your way was chilling, but it also excited you. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t find Mark attractive. In fact, there were some days that you considered him better looking than your own boyfriend. He had the softest heart shaped lips, the prettiest brown eyes with the cutest little mole underneath his right one, a well-defined, sharp nose and such a breathtaking smile. 

Whenever the two of you talked, you could never keep your eyes off of him. But it wasn’t just his charming good looks that had you swoon over him. It was how gentle he was; how he treated you like you were the only girl in the entire world. How he looked at you with so much admiration and adoration. How he made you feel important; made you feel things Jackson never made you feel once in your entire relationship. Since you were so in love with Jackson, you never got to admire Mark in that way. You were so blinded by love, that you failed to pay attention to your surroundings. 

That was until you found out Jackson was being unfaithful; then you began seeing Mark in a different light. You started falling for his sweet words; how he would compliment you on something only he would notice. When you colored your hair a lighter shade, he wouldn’t stop going on about much the color change brought out the color of your eyes and made you even prettier than you already were. Not even Jackson would notice things like that. He always made time for you, put effort in checking up on you and told you the lamest jokes to make you laugh. These days you’d hardly ever receive a hello from your boyfriend. 

The more time you spent with Mark, the more you began losing feelings for Jackson. You also finally came to the realization that you deserved to be treated the way Mark treated you. But Mark was off limits. There was no way you could be anything more to Mark than a colleague at work and someone who was dating his friend. You hated cheaters and the idea of cheating made your skin crawl, but you wanted to get back at Jackson for doing it to you. 

Although you didn’t think he even cared about you or what you did anymore, you wanted to hit him where it hurt. When you took your first shot of tequila, you hated how strong it was and how it burned the back of your throat, yet you found yourself downing two more and right before you could take another one, Mark grabbed it from you and downed it himself. 

“Hey, slow down. Take it easy, the night is still so young y/n.” You rolled your eyes at his comment and began looking out at the dance floor. The patron was starting to kick in and you wanted to let loose. 

“Hey Mark?” He saw the glint in your eye and he knew whatever you had on your mind couldn’t be good, yet he found himself humming in curiosity. 

“Dance with me?” 

Today she wants to dance all night long, eh She is almost single I don't introduce anyone to her, that make her bothered Total, at the end of the night she has what she wants The moon already indicated to her She posted something on her story, someone got mad Her song played and she dedicated it She says she wants to do it with me good, huh Let the windows fog The girl is grown up, how can someone scold her Don't ruin her night, huh The Kardashian is no longer for Kanye There have been many disappointments, eh Lies from all of these assholes, eh Once again they failed her She would give it a chance, but she ran out

Mark should’ve said no. There were red flags going off in his mind, but he didn’t seem to care. At all. His friendship with Jackson was nonexistent at the moment and he didn’t want you dancing with a stranger with evil intentions. You were oblivious a force to reckon with, but at the same time being quite the lightweight, you were already a bit tipsy and Mark knew you wouldn’t be able to handle yourself if he did end up leaving you all alone. 

Heat rushed to his face when he felt you reach for his hand and intertwined it with yours. Your fingers were fairly smaller, but your hands fit perfectly with his. As soon as you made it on to the dance floor, you wrapped your arms around his neck and began dancing. A soft giggle fell from your lips when you noticed how timid and flustered he was being so close to you. He hesitantly placed both his hands on your upper back but they didn’t stay there for too long. With the courage you didn’t think was possible for you to have while you were sober, you brought his hands down to your lower waist and continued to move your hips gracefully to the music. 

“Don’t be such a hardass Mark. If you’re gonna dance, do it right.” Oh he was hard all right. He was hard as soon as he saw you over twenty minutes ago. It was inevitable for him to get so turned on by you. He’s had a crush on you for almost two years now and here you were, smiling up at him while swaying back and forth to The Weeknd. After a couple of moments, Mark finally let loose and allowed himself to dance along with you. He never wanted this moment to end. You looked so free; so in your element and he wanted you to always be this happy. 

He craved to be the source of your happiness and he knew he would treat you the way you deserved to be treated. The two of you were in your own little worlds that you failed to notice that his group of friends were looking directly at you and everyone but Jinyoung were so confused. Why was Mark dancing so freely with you knowing that you were his best friend’s girlfriend? Did he not feel the least bit of weird knowing who you were and that it was wrong for him to have his hands so close to your ass? 

None of them said anything about it though and they were all still so upset with Jackson to want to tell him what was going on so they all pretended like they saw nothing. The next song was a little more sexual, and you didn’t even think as you turned around and began grinding on Mark. Your mind was too clouded with alcohol to realize what you were doing could jeopardize not only your friendship with Mark but his friendship with Jackson. However, you couldn’t find it in yourself to care. 

Feeling his hands make their way down to your hips as he helped you gyrate your ass against his hips sent chills down your spine. As the song continued to play, your movement became more rough, causing Mark’s pants to tighten even more than they already were. He was hard as a rock and on the verge of coming by the feeling of your plump ass rubbing against his cock. Once this song was over, he was planning on excusing himself to the bathroom to fix the huge problem in his pants but not before bringing you to his group of friends so that they could keep an eye on you. 

You however, had other plans. The hardness against your ass caused the coil in your stomach to tighten and you could feel the wetness between your thighs growing when Mark started to thrust upwards. When he brought one of his hands up to your chest and cupped one of your boobs, you released a soft moan. At this point, all your sanity was thrown out the window and before you could process the entire situation in front of you, your lips were on his. 

The kiss was rough; you barely gave Mark any time to prepare before smashing your mouth against his and he knew he shouldn’t be taking advantage of you since he was aware that you were inebriated, but he couldn’t help himself. He’s dreamt of learning what your lips would taste like and feel like molded against his own and now that he knew, he wasn’t going to be able to get enough. His hands playfully squeezed both your ass cheeks before cupping your face in his palms and deepening the kiss. It was rough; your teeth began clashing against his and both your tongues fought for dominance. 

Mark felt as if his entire body was in flames; but at the same time he felt like a bucket of cold water was thrown on him and woke up each and every cell in his body. To his dismay, you pulled away to catch your breath and before he could reconnect your lips together, you went on your tip toes and whispered in his ear. 

“Let’s get out of here.” He felt embarrassed at how eagerly he nodded in agreement and followed directly behind you as you made your way towards the exit. His mind was too busy being filled up with the thought of what the two of you were going to do that he didn’t even think about letting his friends know that he was leaving and he didn’t even think he could make it back to either of your places. He wanted you now. Even if it meant taking you up against his car in the middle of the parking lot. Once you both made your way to his truck, he headed straight for the back seat with every intention on fucking your brains out. You didn’t even have to say anything; although he wished he asked you what you wanted to do first. 

He wanted to make sure the two of you were on the same page, but before he could speak up, you were pushing him down on the chair and reconnecting your lips together. You brought your hands up to both his cheeks and kissed him like your life depended on it. Although he was kissing you so passionately and intensely, you could feel like he still wanted to be gentle with you and the idea made your heart flutter. 

“M—Mark.” With the way he was looking at you with an unfamiliar look in his eye that looked like a mix of adoration and something you couldn’t put your finger on, you wanted to show him just how much he meant to you. You took one of his hands and brought it down to your extremely soaking pussy. “Fuck me. Now.” His eyes widened in shock and he didn’t think you of all people; the shy and gentle y/n who had a hard time telling patients bad news because her heart was so big who also couldn’t tell the barista in the cafe that her order was wrong was capable of having such a dirty mouth on her. He felt his resolve slowly coming to it’s end at the feeling of how wet you were and he was so close to just saying fuck it and taking you right then and there in any and every position possible. But being the gentleman he was who cared about you, he wanted to make sure that you were doing this for all the right reasons. 

“Are you—are you sure about this y/n? I don’t want you doing this because you want to get back at Jackson. Honestly it might even be the alcohol talking for you and I don’t want you doing something like this while you’re not in the right mind. Knowing you, you’re probably wanting to do it right now because you’re vengeful and want to hurt Jackson the way he did with you, but I don’t want you to regret this—“ you placed a sloppy kiss on the corner of his mouth to get him to stop talking before sliding his index finger back and forth along your entrance; collecting all your juices that he caused when he pressed his hard on against your ass. 

“I want this Mark—I’ve wanted you for quite some time. I came out tonight to get fucked by a stranger so that Jackson and his infidelity no longer clouded my thoughts but now—now I want you to fuck me so hard that I can’t walk for the next week. I’m not drunk at all, I sobered up the minute I felt your erection graze my ass. You—you’re all that I want Mark. Please��fuck me.” 

You didn’t care how desperate you sounded and you felt ashamed for sounding so needy, but you’ve dreamt about having sex with Mark on numerous occasions and now your dreams were going to become a reality. 

“You don’t have to ask me twice baby girl. Lay down for me, I’m gonna make you feel so good. Gonna let you know how much I’ve been wanting this—how long I’ve been wanting you for. Gonna eat this pretty pussy of yours and then I’m gonna rearrange your guts. Understand me baby?” 

You let out a soft whimper at the term of endearment. Only then did you process his words and your heart speared at the idea of him harboring feelings for you. There were a few times that you felt Mark held some kind of feelings for you. You don’t buy a donut every single day; their favorite donut to be exact for someone you considered just a friend. You don’t stay at work for an extra hour waiting for someone you considered just a friend to finish work so that you could take them home yet Mark seemed to do that for you almost every single day. 

If his shift ended before yours did, he’d wait for you no matter how long he had to wait for just so he could take you home. You questioned his feelings for you so many times, but you kept lying yourself by saying he did all those things because he was a good friend and wanted to take care of you for Jackson’s sake. Mark placed you down gently before placing his knees on either side of your hips. He left a chaste kiss on your lips before slowly making his way down your body. He started off at your neck, licking and sucking on the soft and delicate flesh. 

You let out a breathy moan when you felt him bite down all but gently on your nape and you were sure it was going to leave a mark but you were more than excited at the thought of him giving you a hickey. After loving on your jaw and neck for a few minutes, he made his way to your breasts and kissed both of them lightly before practically yanking down the top part of your dress, exposing your beautiful mounds and he grunted when he saw that you weren’t wearing anything to protect them. 

“Fuck—do you have any clue how fucking beautiful you are y/n? And how intimidatingly sexy you are? Do you have any idea, how many eyes were on you tonight? This dress—you knew exactly what you were doing when you put this dress on tonight didn’t you baby? Mmm, you like that huh? Like me calling you baby don’t you y/n? Your tits are so fucking huge and so pretty. Who knew you were hiding such a beautiful rack under all those stupid scrubs. I’m gonna take good care of you tonight—gonna make you feel so good. Jackson will be nothing but a name by the time I’m done with you tonight. Now sit back and enjoy the ride baby.” He engulfed his mouth around one of your breasts before massaging your other one and toying with your nipple. 

The feeling of him loving on your chest was such an indescribable feeling. His mouth was warm against your perky breast and whimper fell from the back of your throat when he brought your nipple in between his teeth. He continued his ministrations for a couple of minutes, flicking and nipping at one of your nubs while twisting and pinching on the other. Your hands absentmindedly made their way in to his hair and you couldn’t help but tug on it as he fastened his movements. When you felt him groan against your mounds, probably because of the grip you had on his hair, you sighed in content. He pulled his mouth off of your breast in order to show love to your other one but not before informing you exactly how much he enjoyed sucking on your tits. 

“How does it feel for you y/n? Feel good? You like how my mouth feels sucking on these pretty titties of yours don’t you? Because I know I do. Just give me a couple of minutes to spend on your tits then I’ll make my way down to your cunt. Okay? I’m gonna take my time with you tonight—gonna show you how perfect you are and how you don’t deserve anything but the best.” 

Although the two of you were doing something so naughty, you couldn’t help but smile at his sweet words. However, when you felt his tongue licking circling around your other nipple before completely taking whatever he could fit inside of his mouth, your lips formed a small “o” at the feeling. During your relationship, you and Jackson had sex multiple times and you’d be lying if you said he wasn’t a good lover. He was great in bed. 

Not only was he rough, but he was also very naughty and always whispered the dirtiest things in your ear while he pounded himself inside of you. However, he was more focused on himself; he’d always expect a blow job every single time the two of you had sex but he never ate you out unless he was in the mood. Another thing you could do without was the fact that he only cared about whether or not he came. There was nothing wrong with him wanting to make sure he reached his orgasm, you just wished he be more adamant in wanting you to receive the same pleasure. 

The way Mark was taking his time learning each and every curve while showing love to every one of your body parts made your head spin. It was one thing for him to say you were beautiful but it was another thing for him to prove it with his actions. The longer he spent on your breasts, the faster warmth grew between your legs and as much as you loved breast play, and you loved the feeling of Mark’s mouth sucking and nipping on your chest, you needed his mouth sucking on a different body part of yours soon or else you were going to lose it. 

“M—Mark.” He pulled his mouth off before looking up at you with his cute little doe eyes. 

“Yes baby?” You reached for his hand and brought it down to your core, cupping it all but gently so he could feel just how wet your pussy was. 

“Please—touch me—eat me—fuck me with that pretty mouth of yours. Do anything Mark please—“ he giggled softly in to your neck at how submissive you were acting. How could someone sound so cute while begging for head? Even if the two of you had yet to do anything really, he knew he wanted to have you again and again. As many times as he possibly could. Thankfully Mark didn’t seem to be the teasing type; he made his way down to your thighs, pulling your dress down and taking it off completely. 

“Fuck—how can you—you can’t be real. Shit y/n, I know I’ve said this countless times already but you’re so fucking sexy.” Soft kisses and a couple of love bites were  left in his wake as he gently grazed his hands along your sides. Once he finally made his way down to your entrance, he left multiple kisses on the inside of your thighs. Absentmindedly, your hands found purchase in his hair, gripping softly when he blew a cool breeze against your core. 

“Such a pretty pussy—so so pretty—“ He took no time in licking a strip along your clit. His tongue was firm and solid as he lapped up all of your juices. Both feeling and hearing him hum against your cunt tightened the coil that was building up in your tummy. He continued his licks but didn’t take too long before he brought your clit in between his lips. The feeling of him nibbling and sucking against your nub felt like heaven. To add to your pleasure, Mark pressed a sloppy kiss at your core and leaned himself away from your cunt so he could bring two of his fingers up to your entrance. 

“Wanna feel how tight you are for me y/n—wanna see if you can handle me later—you already taste so good baby, let’s see how well you take me. I wanna see the effect my tongue is having on you.” Countless moans began falling from your throat and you could feel your eyes roll to the back of your head once you felt his fingers make their way in to your tight walls. One of your biggest weaknesses were Mark’s fingers. You always found them so long and skinny. Whenever the two of you ate lunch together, you’d take notice how pretty his fingers were as he’d write something down or whenever he played video games, you’d watch as his fingers would flick at the controllers so swiftly and you’d find yourself wanting to know what else his fingers were capable of. 

Having him scissor you open while continuing his attack on your pussy with his tongue was driving you to the brink of insanity. Whenever you’d find yourself daydreaming of what making love to Mark would feel like, you always imagined it to be an otherworldly experience and as you have his face buried in to your core, you couldn’t help but feel as if it was even more than that. His pace with shoving his fingers in and out of you was relentless. And God, the feeling of his teeth grazing against your over sensitive folds would forever be etched in to the back of your mind. 

“Mmm—Mark—so so good—I’m almost there—f—fuck.” Your wanton moans and breathy curses only drove him to go harder and you couldn’t stop the screams that filled his car. It was getting too much for you to handle and with the way Mark was grinding himself in to the chair to get any friction against his extremely hard and painful erection, you knew you weren’t the only one losing your sanity. 

“Let go for me baby.” Those five words did wonders for the burning sensation in your chest and soon you were practically seeing stars. Mark literally fucked the shit out of you with just his fingers and mouth alone. Your spine tingled with excitement at the idea of what he was capable of doing to you once he did both of you a favor and penetrated you. He looked up at you with the most adorable smile once he licked you up entirely and you couldn’t help but giggle at how he looked so adorable with your essence all over his face. 

“Come here.” You didn’t have to ask him twice; he quickly got up from off the floor and connected your lips together. His kiss was more softer this time and it gave you the chance to really take in the beautiful man hovering on top of you. After years of having an internal battle with yourself; trying to lie to yourself saying you only appreciated him because of his devastatingly good looks and how nice he was towards you and that there was no way you could possibly have any feelings for him whatsoever, you came to the conclusion that you’ve always harbored feelings for the older boy. And that says a lot seeing as how you were sure you loved Jackson with your entire being. 

When he began to grind himself against your naked sex, you broke out of your thoughts and released an erotic whimper; one that went straight to Mark’s pants. The rough material of his skinny jeans against your sensitive nub was something you weren’t used to, but it was a pleasurable soreness you couldn’t get enough of. 

“Take off your pants. Now.” If this was under different circumstances and he had the normal amount of patience he usually did, then he would’ve laughed at your impatient demeanor. He would’ve also teased you and went against everything you were asking of him just to mess with you. But since this was the first time he got to have his way with you after pursuing you for the last few years, he was just as excited as you were. Breaking away from you for a few seconds, he yanked his shirt off not caring if he were to ruin it or not and pulled his jeans off, leaving him in just his underwear. Your mouth watered at the sight of his dick imprint against his briefs and you took no time in reaching over to palm him over the thin material. Seeing him bite his lip at your touch made your cheeks warm and before you could continue your ministrations, he ripped your hand away and sat you up. 

“You’re gonna ride me like the filthy slut you are. Then you’re gonna suck on my cock. Am I clear?” There were so many times you’d find yourself wondering what Mark was like behind closed doors. You got to see him interact with patients every now and then and he was always so sweet; so patient with them. Your personalities were practically mirrored each other’s, which is why you found it hard to believe he had such a dirty mouth on him. Although you hated the idea of men degrading women, you loved hearing him say such erotic and naughty words. You nodded in agreement, closing your legs together at the thought of finally becoming one with Mark. 

Sometimes you wondered what life would’ve been like if you were to meet Mark before Jackson. Sure, the last two years with Jackson were some of the best years of your life so far, but you couldn’t stop the tiny voice in your head telling you that Mark was so much better for you. You began to worry at what was going to happen after the two of you finished your love making session. Did he really want you like he claimed he did? Or was he just having sex with you to have sex? You didn’t want to ruin your time together before it could really start and looked up at him while dragging your finger along his well defined body. How was he so ripped for a x-ray technician? When did he have the time to work on his body knowing that he worked 40 hours a week with overtime? 

“You’re so hot.” It came out a whisper, but the giggle that fell from his lips made it aware that he heard it and your cheeks grew red in embarrassment. He placed a soft kiss on your nose and placed some of your hair behind your ear so he could get a better look at you. 

“Stop being so cute. It makes it hard having all these vulgar and filthy images of what I plan on doing to you right now.” After playfully pinching your butt and a couple of stolen kisses later, he pulled off his underwear and threw it somewhere on the ground. Your breath hitched at the sight. Not only was he long, but he was also very thick and you had to take in a big gulp when you realized how he was going to vehemently stretch out your walls. Noticing your blank face, he couldn’t help but feel like something was wrong and he hated the thought of rushing you. You were his best friend’s girlfriend for God’s sake. 

This was all happening too soon. You came out tonight with vengeance on your mind and he knew it was wrong to be an accomplice; to be the one you fooled around with but he didn’t care anymore. He was aware how unethical it was to lose a friendship of over ten years for a girl he’s known for two, but you weren’t just some random girl. You were the love of his life and once the two of you were to call it a night, he was going to try and see if you were willing to take things further in your relationship.

“Everything okay y/n?” You didn’t realize that you must’ve been blanking out and you nodded quickly while flipping the two of you so that he was laying against the seat and you were on top of him. 

“You’re just—um—yeah.” He looked at you in curiosity before placing his hands on both of your ass cheeks and kneading them all but gently. 

“I’m sorry—I didn’t quite get that y/n. I’m gonna need you to speak up if you plan on sinking on my dick at all tonight. Don’t hide from me baby. I want to see the real you. The you that no one else gets to see. Be loud for me y/n.” A soft sigh fell from your lips before bringing your hand to his face and bringing his cheeks in between your fingers. 

“Your cock is huge and I can’t wait to feel it inside of me. Is that what you wanted to hear? Don’t lie, you want me to ride you just as much as I want to so even if I didn’t admit it you—“ The forceful kiss he smashed against your lips got you to stop all together. 

“I’ve wanted to fuck you the minute I’ve met you. Well—I mean I wanted to do a lot of things with you. I wanted to kiss you at the most randomest times of the day, I wanted to hold you and to be held by you. I wanted to beat you in halo and have you take out your anger from losing on me in bed. I wanted to take you out on cute little dates and have you meet my family. Everything Jackson got to do, I wanted to do it. I hated seeing the two of you be all lovey dovey knowing that I had feelings for you—have feelings for you. I still can’t believe we’re here right now and I’m just seconds away from burying myself balls deep in that tight cunt of yours. You mean a hell of a lot to me y/n. I’ll take good care of you baby—not just right now. If you’ll give me the chance—I’ll treat you the way you deserve. I’ll give you my all—everything I have. I’ll never give you a reason to question your worth. You’re so fucking perfect y/n and you’re all I could ever want—need in my life.” 

You didn’t even realize you were tearing up until he brought his fingers up to your cheek to wipe away a stray tear. He ran his thumb across your bottom lip and you playfully brought it in to your mouth, seductively sucking on it to get a rise out of him. When you first found out that Jackson was cheating on you, you were quick to blame yourself for not being good enough. You began to feel like you weren’t enough for Jackson. Not pretty enough, funny enough, smart enough, sexy enough. You felt worthless and you were afraid that any man would get tired of you and move on to someone more exciting; more thrilling who did more than baking new recipes she saw on the food network and reading romantic novels in her free time. 

Mark however, in less than an hour made you feel like you were the most beautiful girl in the entire world. Like you were an ethereal goddess on this hell forsaken earth and he’s always treated you this way. It just took so long for you to finally come to that realization and now that you did, you knew that you wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of your life loving and being loved by Mark.

“Take me Mark. I’m yours.” The growl that came from the back of his throat sent you in a frenzy. For someone who had such an adorable and extremely contagious high pitched laugh, it was hard to believe that he had such a deep and raspy voice. Whenever the two of you had shifts early in the morning, you were lucky enough to hear how hoarse and rough his voice could get and it was extremely attractive. Now that it was being used in such a sensual and lustful atmosphere, you couldn’t be more turned on. 

“Wait—y/n, I don’t have a condom. Fuck—“ you gave him a smirk before taking his cock in your hand; you grazed your thumb against his slit and spread the precum around the tip before cupping his length and dragging your hand along his girth. Watching him throw his head back while biting his bottom lip in attempts to keep in his moans and grunts gave you a huge amount of confidence you didn’t think was possible. In most of your love making sessions with Jackson, you let him dominate you every single time. It wasn’t like he gave you much of a choice though; he made it aware that he never submitted to anybody. 

Seeing Mark; completely putty in your hands was a sight you’d never get over wanting to see. After giving his cock a few pumps, you lined him up at your entrance; gliding his tip along your folds to collect some of your essence from earlier as lubricant. Neither of you were prepared for the delicious stretch once you finally sank down on him. Your walls were so warm; so tight and so wet and Mark knew he wasn’t going to last long. He could come right then and there if he really wanted to but he didn’t want to seem like a loser who came in less than three minutes no matter how crazy you were driving him. 

The two of you moaned in sink and he immediately sat up; not being able to physically stay away from you. He wanted to be as close to you as he possibly could. His chest was warm against yours and the feeling of his heartbeat made you smile against his neck. 

“I’m on the pill if you’re okay with that.” He nodded quickly and smashed his lips roughly against yours. 

“You feel so fucking good—so fucking tight—I’m gonna need you to do something soon—ride me y/n. Fuck me like you hate me baby—I wanna see those tits bounce for me.” You took his arms off from your waist and shoved him back down to his previous position. As much as you loved the feeling of his arms wrapped protectively around your body, you wanted to watch his facial expressions as you bounced on him. He looked at you with so much lust in his eyes; seeing you so forceful and commanding made his dick twitch. You grabbed tightly at both of his wrists and pinned them above his head before you got off of him and sank back down. His cock was throbbing at this point and you were sure he was probably suffering not being able to do anything about it for the last hour. 

Feeling his cock glide perfectly against your tight, velvety walls was mindblowing. He began meeting your thrusts roughly, shoving himself as far as he could go in to your pussy that this position allowed him to. Mark may have been underneath you and readily allowed you to take the lead, but he was a power bottom. He couldn’t help himself; you just felt so good each and every time your ass sank down and clapped against his abdomen. Sure, he already thought you were so beautiful, but having you there with your hair a tangled messed, your otherworldly figure naked and bare, breasts bouncing, sweat building up on your body with your skin glistening and your face reacting to each and every pump of his dick against your core, Mark felt like this was when you were the most beautiful. There was nothing he loved more than hearing his name fall from your lips the rougher he thrusted himself in to you. Skin on skin slapping filled up the car and the windows began to fog. 

“M—Mark—fuck me—“ he giggled softly and cupped your cheek with his palm as you continued bouncing on him at a fleeting pace. 

“Isn’t that what I’m doing baby? Fuck y/n—you feel so good. I love being buried in this tight cunt of yours. Tell me y/n—whose making you feel so good. Whose cock is stretching you out so well huh? Fucking say it y/n.” You placed one hand on his chest while bringing the other one to wrap around his neck. He gasped at your movements and you could tell it wasn’t something he was used to, but he didn’t do anything to stop it nor did he seem like he wanted you to pull away. 

“You Mark—you. And only you. Your cock feels so good—you’re so—ugh—fucking huge—“ right as you were about to continue, a noise interrupted the two of you and you wanted to ignore it, but you knew exactly what—or who it was. 

“What is that?” You groaned before looking around for your phone. You had no clue where anything was at this point; your mind was so set on having Mark fuck the living shit out of you so you didn’t care about anything else. “Nothing, ignore it. Keep fucking me.” His hands cupped both of your breasts and playfully flicked both your nipples before continuing to massage them. Unfortunately, your phone went off again and this time, Mark grew curious as to who might have been calling. 

“Maybe you should answer it. It must be important if they’re calling a second time.” You looked towards the ground in search of your phone and rolled your eyes at the caller id. 

What perfect timing he had. “It’s Jackson.” The frown that rose upon Mark’s face made your heart sink; he didn’t understand why he was so bothered. He was the one with his dick inside of you at the moment, so what did it matter if Jackson was calling? His grimace didn’t last long when an idea immediately popped in to his head. 

“Answer it.” You looked at him in disbelief. Did he really think you were going to answer your boyfriend’s phone call while you were currently riding another man? He had to be crazy; but the devilish grin on his face said otherwise. “You heard me y/n. Answer it. Answer him while I fuck you. Let’s see how much of a good girl you really are.” It was risky, and you were afraid your cover was going to be blown as soon as you said hello. But you didn’t care anymore. If Jackson were to find out what you were doing right now and who you were doing right now, then so be it. You were already having such a hard time controlling your moans and stifled cries of pleasure, what more now while talking on the phone with your boyfriend? 

“Hey—what’s up?” Mark looked at you with an unreadable look in his eye but deep down you knew it couldn’t be good. 

“What am I doing—I—uh—I’m working out—yeah—f—fuck—hmph—sorry, there’s this one squat that’s—so fucking hard—“ he lifted you off of him in one swift motion and flipped the two of you so that you were lying on your stomach and he was hovering over your back. Out of all the positions, doggy style was his favorite. Mark couldn’t count on his hands how many times he pictured you on all fours as he fucked in to you with no mercy. He didn’t even give you any time to prepare before inserting himself back inside of you. Jackson had to be an idiot for not even thinking that you were currently fucking someone else. Your moans were that of pleasure, not pain. 

Mark’s pace was relentless; he was practically in jack rabbit mode pulling out and pushing himself inside of you at a pace that was driving you closer to the edge. He found his way in to the crook of your neck and left a few wet kisses there. 

“You—you wanna come—over? Right now? Oh, um, I’m actually really tired—FUCK—sorry I just stubbed my toe—I’ll probably take a shower and go tO BED FUCK—“ For some reason, knowing that Jackson was on the other side of the call heightened Mark’s desire to want to hurry up and reach his orgasm. Something about the fact that the two of you were so close to getting caught aroused him even more. You didn’t even have the chance to continue before Mark yanked your phone away and threw it back on the ground. If you weren’t so focused on your release, you would’ve been mad at the lack of care he had for your expensive technology. But you could feel your orgasm building up and it was all you wanted at this point. 

“He talks too much—you’re supposed to be focused on me—how do you think he’ll feel knowing that his best friend fucked his girlfriend doggy style? You like this position don’t you y/n? You like how it feels getting your back blown out. Love the feeling of your beautiful ass clapping against my navel? Love being on your knees like the dirty girl you are. I hope you know once we’re done in here, I plan on taking you back to my place and having you again. I’m never gonna get enough of you y/n. I love—I—fuck I love you so much ahhh shit—“ his creamy, warm liquid filled up your body in deep, rushed squirts. You couldn’t put in to words how full you now felt and you didn’t know if it was because he filled you to the hilt with his cum, or because he just confessed that he loved you. 

Being the insecure person that you were, you couldn’t stop the tiny voice in your head telling you that he said it in the heat of the moment. There was no way he could love you. He was Mark Tuan; one of the most popular and sought out bachelors in your entire hospital. Every nurse, receptionist and medical assistant had eyes for him and you couldn’t blame them. He was gorgeous and you were sure he could get anyone he wants; especially someone without baggage from a toxic relationship with someone he called his best friend. Mark could do so much better than you. 

Although you could tell he was tired, he continued his thrusts inside you while bringing his hand down to your clit and rubbing on it to help bring you to your orgasm. He wanted you to feel the euphoria he was feeling since you milked him dry of everything he had and rode the living hell out of him. Before you knew it, you were soon seeing stars and coming a second time that night in less than an hour. Jackson, and any one of your previous boyfriends could never get you to come even once the entire duration of your hookup. Your heart warmed at the idea of Mark wanting to make sure you were having an equally amazing time as he was. 

He was the first man who seemed genuinely interested in making sure that you were taken cared of and as selfish as it sounded, you craved to have another chance to be one with him. Once you both reached your highs, he turned you over and gently placed you down on the seat before plopping himself on top of you. Usually you would complain about how sticky and sweaty your partner was after sex, but something about Mark was different from everyone else. You wanted to be as close to him to be able to feel his heartbeat. 

The one that was practically beating against your chest like a snare drum. He leaned back to take a good look at you and stole one kiss from the corner of your mouth while brushing some stray hairs away from your face. “That’s my pretty baby. Such a good girl y/n. I can’t—that was—fuck. You are ethereal. I know I told you to fuck the life out of me but shit—I didn’t think you’d actually do it. I’m gonna need to have you at least three times a day.” 

You let out an exhausted giggle while tracing some patterns on his back. No matter how tired you were though, watching him stare at you like you were some marvel, like the person who set the solar system in the sky made you want to show him what the idea of making love to him again did to you. “Mark. I want to suck you off.” The fit of coughs that fell from the back of his throat was unexpected. In his past experiences, Mark never forced a girl to ever do something she didn’t want to do. One of his favorite parts of sex was receiving head, but he only wanted his partner to blow him if she wanted to; not because she felt like she had to. However, hearing you confidently confess that you wanted to give him a blowjob made his heart flutter and he could feel himself getting hard again. 

“God y/n, you’re too good for me. I can’t wait to fuck that pretty mouth of yours.” He was quick in pulling himself out of you; the whimper that fell from your lips at the absence of him inside of you made him stifle back a laugh but seeing you sink to your knees was a sight that Mark would’ve never thought he would ever see in his 27 years of existence. You put your hair up in a makeshift ponytail and brought his dick in to the palm of your hand. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t think penises were ugly. Genitals in general were extremely ugly; but something about Mark’s made your cheeks warm and your core throb. Was there nothing wrong with this man at all? It was obvious he was God’s favorite. 

You spit on the tip of his cock to lubricate him before you began pumping him from the tip of his cock down to his balls. You brought your thumb against the side of his length and slowly glided it back and forth. Then, after what felt like hours to Mark, you placed a kiss on the tip before wrapping your mouth around it. The feeling of your tongue circling against the head while you ran it in between his slit made him want to pull his hair out. You barely got to do anything and he felt like he was overstimulated. You lowered your hands to both of his balls and began fondling them while completely engulfing his dick with your mouth. You tried to take as much of him in to your mouth as you possibly could. 

His tip hit the back of your throat with each and every thrust and you could feel tears building up in your eyes. It hurt; your mouth was already opened as wide as it could possibly go and Mark lost himself in how amazing it felt. Your mouth was warm and tight; just like your cunt and he was enjoying the feeling of your teeth grazing along his veins. 

“Fuck y/n—you’re swallowing me so well. Your mouth—fuck your mouth—so warm—so wet. You look so pretty like this; with my cock down your throat. Even prettier with it buried in your soaking pussy. Do you think I could—would it be okay if—I face fuck you? Sorry baby—it’s just too much. Don’t hesitate to tell me if it hurts okay? I just—fuck I can’t wait to feel you choking on me.” He allowed you some time to prepare and to get in to a comfortable position. When you gave Mark the okay, he reached for your ponytail and gave it a light tug. 

“Wait Mark—before I start, I want to try something.” The question was on the tip of his tongue, but stopped altogether the minute he felt you bring one of his balls in to your mouth; roughly sucking and grazing it ever so softly with your teeth. You didn’t spend much time on his balls, you wanted nothing more than to feel him fuck your mouth but you wanted to show his body the same amount of love he was showing to yours. After nipping, sucking and fondling both of his balls, you brought your mouth back on to his cock and let him control the pace and tempo of his thrusts. He placed one hand on the back of your head as the other yanked at your ponytail. You could feel your jaw working pretty hard on swallowing him and you could feel saliva falling from the sides of your mouth; but the moans, animalistic grunts, and compliments of how good you were blowing him made the pain worth it. 

Not too long after you began sucking on his cock, your phone started to ring again and you had a fear that Jackson put two and two together. At this point, you didn’t give two shits if he were to find out. Matter of a fact, you wanted him to find out. You would even take a picture of Mark’s dick down your throat if you could. Even if Jackson no longer loved you, his ego would surely hurt if he were to find out you slept with his best friend and if you told him that not only was Mark more well endowed, but that he was a much better lover than Jackson could ever be. You were in shock when Mark picked your phone up with his foot and glared at him for doing so, but in even more shock when he answered the phone. 

“Hey man—it’s Mark. Y/n can’t talk right now, my cock is shoved deep down her throat and we would like it if you would stop interrupting us I’m trying to bust a nut in her mouth right now. Bye.” Your eyes widened in shock at his words; not only did he confess that you were blowing him, but he said it so nonchalantly. Like getting sucked off by your best friend’s girlfriend was something natural that happened every day. You pulled your mouth from off of him and looked at him in awe but all he did was smirk and give you a noncommittal shrug. 

“What? It was gonna come out sooner or later. Don’t act so surprised, you weren’t all that inconspicuous when you were riding this cock while talking to him. Oh you’re exercising all right—clenching your tight pussy on my cock—they call that kegel if I’m not mistaken. Now, be a good girl and take me back in to your mouth.” You playfully rolled your eyes at his command and wrapped your lips back around his cock, taking him as deep in to the back of your mouth as you could. Whatever you couldn’t fit, you wrapped your hand around and began pumping him; the sounds that fell from his lips were so heavenly. 

Never in a million years would you have ever thought you’d find yourself on the floor of Mark’s car with his dick down your throat but you weren’t complaining. He continued to thrust roughly inside of your mouth, trying his best not to hurt you too much but you just felt so good. Watching as you hollowed your cheeks as you continued bobbing your head up and down brought him so much pleasure. There was so many things he wanted to do to you and with you. Face fucking that pretty little mouth of yours was always at the top of his list and he still couldn’t believe it was happening. Feeling you choke on him as he continued ramming himself inside of you is what finally got him to break and to your delight, he released his load in your mouth. You milked him of everything he had and made sure to leave one more kiss on his tip before pulling your lips off with a loud pop. 

“Damn—Jackson really fucked up didn’t he? Fuck—you can’t be real. You suck dick like your life depends on it. I always knew you were a kinky little shit. You were made to suck my cock y/n. That was incredible—you were—wow. I can’t even tell you how much I loved that. I always knew sex with you would be an experience but I wasn’t prepared for that.” 

You let out a soft giggle, but your mind was filled with so many different thoughts. He told you he loved you while he was buried inside of you. Did he really mean it? Or was he having a mental breakdown and wasn’t able to think of what he was saying? But he also mentioned on having you again and that he’s dreamt of having you like this for a while, so that had to mean something right? 

“What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours? You’re spacing out y/n.” He reached out for you and brought you on to his lap while running his fingers along your ribcage. Mark knew you long enough to learn the meanings behind your different mannerisms and he could tell something was on your mind. He was going to make it aware that he was telling you the truth earlier. Taking care of you and your happiness was his new main priority. All he ever wanted to do was to be the main reason behind your breathtaking smile and contagious laughter. He wanted to remind you every single day of how you were the most special person in his life. No matter what this was going to do with his friendship with Jackson, he was going to let it happen. 

“Mark.” You looked up at him with curiosity in your eyes and nervousness in your chest. “You said you love me and that you wanna take care of me from now on. Did you—um—do you mean it?” You brought your attention to the ground; not quite prepared for his answer. If this was a spur of the moment kind of thing, you were screwed in more ways than one. Not only were you newly single, or at least had every intention on breaking up with Jackson now, but you didn’t want to lose your friendship with Mark. You were mad with yourself for letting your carnal urges take over, but he was allowing it to continue. He could’ve stopped you the minute you began grinding your ass against his crotch, but he made it aware that he wanted you just as much as you wanted him. His lips were warm against the corner of your mouth; he began placing feather light kisses all around your face until reconnecting your lips together. 

There were times in your relationship where you no longer got butterflies from kissing Jackson and that’s when you knew there was a chance your relationship was going to go downhill. Kissing Mark however was a completely different story. Your body felt electrified. His kiss ignited a fire in your bones and you couldn’t stop wanting to kiss him. 

“I meant every single thing I said y/n. I love you—I’ve been in love with you for longer than I’d like to admit. I um—I don’t know how to say this without sounding like an asshole or a bad friend—I’ve actually been single this entire time because I’ve only ever had eyes for you. Pathetic right? I’ve been pining after my best friend’s girlfriend from the beginning of their relationship. I just—I’ve always thought the world of you. I always admired you; your determination, work ethic, your kindness, generosity, intelligence—you’re the most astounding person I’ve ever met. I knew you were out of Jackson’s league when he first introduced us to you and the more time I spent with you, the more I realized that nobody really deserved you. Not even me. I don’t know how you feel about me, but I can only hope by the mind blowing sex we just relinquished in that you have some kind of feelings for me. Even if this was a brief lapse of judgment on your part, I hope you realize that you deserve so much more than what Jackson can give you. I’m sorry for not telling you of his infidelity earlier, but I wanted him to tell. I can promise you I’m not hiding anything else from you and if you give me the chance, I’d love to be yours y/n.” His confession sent your head spinning and you didn’t think you could form the words to show him how much he meant to you and how excited you were to take things further in your relationship. Seeing that beautiful smile of yours that he loved so much light up your face made him mirror your expression and placed a soft kiss on your nose. “I’m taking that pretty smile of yours as the answer—“

“I love you too. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have any feelings for you. I think I always felt something toward you and only now did I realize that it was love—I knew it was wrong to like you while I was in a relationship so that’s why I tried my best to ignore all the romantic thoughts I’d have of you. I just—I didn’t think I deserved you. You did so many things for me—things that Jackson didn’t even do for me and I couldn’t help but thinking that I was with the wrong person. Just a few months ago, I started wishing it was you whenever I kissed Jackson or whenever we had sex. Every time he held my hand or pulled me in to his embrace, I’d pretend it was you. I always felt this connection with you and sometimes I’d mention inviting you over to Jackson’s every now and then so I had an excuse to see you. You know when I found out he was cheating, I had this crazy idea of getting back at him and this naughty fantasy of fucking you in my bedroom and having him walk in on us would replay over and over in my head. I’d love to be yours Mark. It’s all I ever wanted. Things would’ve been so much better if I met you on my own in the hospital before I met Jackson, but let’s not worry about it. We’re together now, that’s all that matters. But Mark—what about Jackson?” He let out a scoff. 

“What about Jackson? Fuck him—wait don’t. I’m going to be the only man you fuck from now on. I lost all respect for him when I found out he was cheating on you. How could anyone in their right minds do such a thing to you? You’re the most flawless being in existence and his dumbass took advantage of you. Now his karma is going to suffer watching me take care of you in the ways he failed to. Maybe we should go and make that fantasy a reality right now? There are so many ways and so many places I plan on taking you in baby. You’re mine y/n and I’m going to make sure everyone in your building knows it once I’m done with you.”

[oneboxofmatches]

Hi!!! May I request a HP romantic and friendship matchup on both eras? (Preferably male), thanks in advance! 💞

𝗕𝗔𝗦𝗜𝗖𝗦 + 𝗔𝗣𝗣𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗔𝗡𝗖𝗘

19, Libra, Neutral Good, enneagram is 4w5, Ravenclaw, and my patronus spirit is swan. Bi Pan Genderfluid girl using pronouns of She/Her or He/Him. A friend of mine told me that I (kinda) look like Marinette from 𝗠𝗶𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘂𝗹𝗼𝘂𝘀 𝗟𝗮𝗱𝘆𝗯𝘂𝗴, Musa from 𝗪𝗶𝗻𝘅 𝗖𝗹𝘂𝗯, and Alexandra Trese from 𝗧𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲 (a Netflix animated series), but the exception is I'm short (5'1.2") plus sized Southeast Asian woman with Spanish descent that has messy/wavy brunette medium hair, chocolate brown eyes, oriental skin and a small beauty mark on the forehead. My sense of fashion is in between emo and boyish plus korean glam.

𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗢𝗡𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗧𝗬

Distant and shy at first cause' I dunno how to initiate a conversation, but a total opposite if I open up---friendly, ambivert, witty, laughing loudly on a daily basis, talkative, awkward, daydreamer (I got embarrassed from knocking at the door even I'm inside the classroom 😂), EXTREMELY clumsy, secretly likes affection, easily overwhelmed, prone to melt over any wholesomeness, flusters on compliments, lightly blushes on cheesy banters, sarcastic person with a lowkey crackhead energy citing meme references, and talented girl who can be your no. 1 supporter and unashamed to be true to myself. In terms of leadership, I only educate and guide than being a prefect (I might take the role seriously), and will lift my group when there's lacking/incompleteness. About doing projects in school, I become too extra and prepared for efforts, but I'll forget the process in the end.

People thought I'm a demure self-effacing woman that looks "idealistic" or "one of a kind," (due to my protective parents, a reason why I've never been in a relationship) but the truth is, I'm eloquent, warm-hearted, willig to help, kind, intelligent, supportive, nice, creative, enthusiastic, determined, tough, competitive, and feisty outside, but a real softie that can be childish and dramatic crybaby filled with doubts, frustrations, and insecurities with fear of failure that pushes off the limits to to please everyone, yet I still managed to be stronger than ever, even it's a slow burn process. I can be intimidating, sassy, and a douchebag if I receive ends. Immature, headstrong, perfectionist, demanding, hesitant, jumpy, very indecisive, overthinker, quick-tempered, sensitive, and anxious (no joke, my nervousness makes me think worse scenario will arrive or I might break a belonging due to my carelessness). Though can be procrastinator and arrogant, I raised as a religious 𝖺𝗇𝖽 diplomatic person, willing to fight what I believe (including my dreams) 𝖺𝗇𝖽 what is right. In addition, I have a habit of staying up late and doing sign of the cross to ease nervousness.

Blunt but the loudest idiotic feeling-brokenhearted and bitter friend in the group who fangirl a lot, swears like sailor, will act like a silent backstabber on people that we loathe, will crack up over your stupid antics before helping, and bring gossips, but a hopeless romantic who tends to banter with sarcasms or pick up lines as an endearment (but gets grumpy if I received sappy or offensive one), still generous and concerned in a subtle way.

𝗛𝗢𝗕𝗕𝗜𝗘𝗦

My hobbies are singing, drawing, roleplaying, listening to music, chatting/browsing on social media, conceptualizing, writing, and reading some stuffs. 𝖨'𝗅𝗅 𝗂𝗇𝖼𝗅𝗎𝖽𝖾 making corniest jokes/puns, 𝗌𝗅𝖾𝖾𝗉𝗂𝗇𝗀, and dancing when nobody's around or walking like a model if I feel so bold (even I'm terrible at both xD).

𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘𝗦

Loves kittens, eating a lot, cartoons, watching YouTube videos (mostly pageants, ASMR, edit audios, and mukbangs), also enjoys playing games on my sister's PSP. Sucker for arts, choir, night sky, makeup, fun/deep/dumb conversations, Christianity, documentaries (about saints, real crime stories, and inspirational people), reading interesting stuffs, talking about social issues, and writings, chilling both indoors and outdoors. Beside that, my music taste are like late 90s-2000s songs (mostly rock, pop, and country) sometimes kpop and ppop, chocoholic, and a sweetooth as well.

𝗗𝗜𝗦𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘𝗦

Things that I hate are stereotyping, HUGE creepy crawlies (spiders, toads, snakes, and cockroaches), firecracker sounds, being left out, loneliness, heart break, blackout, and judgemental people. One random fact about me is, I 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 vent out EVERYTHING I despise in my entire existence---from bad soap operas to toxicity and worse scenarios in real life, because it's a big deal for me, and I consider forcing me to do what I'm not into and manipulating me as my major pet peeves.

𝗧𝗥𝗜𝗚𝗚𝗘𝗥𝗦

In terms of triggers...I only have two which are ta𝖨king about divorce/annullment/separation because I came from a generational broken family and religion/beliefs discrimination, cause' there are reasonings that doesn't makes sense because some are too hypocritical.

𝗧𝗥𝗜𝗩𝗜𝗔

My best assets are smile, eyes, personality, singing voice, artistic skills, writings, intelligence, and oratorical skills...so I can consider myself as a singer, artist, orator, and a top student who's a former active campus ministry member with three roles (choir leader, psalm singer, and reader). Currently an incoming college freshman, learning how to cook and have so many interests, to the point I don't know what I'm into because of my dreams to become a popular Filipino YouTuber, a novelist, and being part of a successful chorale competing internationally...I also consider joining pageants at school too once the pandemic ends, but maybe.

Thank you so, so much for requesting! I had a lot of fun with this one (as you can tell by some of the really long answers lol) and I hope you enjoy!!

In the Golden Trio era, I romantically pair you with…

CEDRIC DIGGORY

One of the most beautiful things about Cedric is that although he may show some introverted tendencies, he still manages to have a natural gift for connecting to others and allowing them to feel comfortable enough to open up. Really, your initial distance and shyness don't last nearly as long towards Cedric as they would with most other people.

Hearing your laughter brings the widest, cheesiest grin to Cedric’s face. Not only does he adore seeing you happy, but he also recognizes that your anxiety, insecurities, and strong emotions can sometimes cloud up your demeanor. Therefore, it brings him comfort knowing that (for the moment) you’re finding joy. He thrives when you thrive!

However, as much as he loves seeing your more energetic and happier self, it goes without saying that he’s the best comfort for when you’re not having the best day.

Cedric is an excellent listener, so he’ll most likely let you talk without interruption for as long as you need before even saying a word. He wants to make sure he truly understands your current state before acting. He may take a few seconds to process everything after you finish speaking, but then he’ll help you tackle whatever problems you’re facing. He’s especially talented at giving words of affirmation.

Cedric’s listening also comes in handy whenever you talk about your interests! He genuinely loves hearing about the things you’re interested in solely for the fact that you’re interested in them. Side note: you can count on him to be at any music performances, pageants, etc. you may have -- this guy is truly your #1 supporter.

Cedric’s a very good student (though I suspect he’s somewhat of a procrastinator himself), so I can also see you two supporting each other through schoolwork and celebrating each other’s successes.

Like you, Cedric has a strong urge to do the right thing. Talking to him about social issues stirs up a need to help, and I could see you two doing volunteer work together in your spare time.

I like to believe one of Cedric’s biggest love languages is quality time. Don’t get me wrong, this guy loves staying involved and busy. But taking a couple hours to be with you in small ways (even if that means just being in the same room while you scroll through social media) gives him a nice balance.

Overall, this kind boy will be there unwaveringly through the bad times and will laugh just as loud as you through the good!

As a friend, I think you’d best be matched with…

LUNA LOVEGOOD

You wanna talk about the best conversations, relentless support, and overall the most wholesome friendship you could ask for? Luna’s your girl.

Being unashamed to be true to yourself is one of the biggest reasons why Luna is so drawn to you. While she’s very friendly and insightful towards everyone she meets, it can get a bit repetitive for her to constantly interact with people who try to shelter their unique characteristics from the world. In her mind, these unique characteristics are what make people so fascinating! Why should anyone hide who they are?

Luna’s creativity is endless, and I can see it blending well with yours. Collaborating on a personal project outside of school (ex: novel, blog, etc.) together is definitely something I could see you two doing.

Speaking of creativity, finding creative solutions to everyday problems (both in school and in life) is your specialty as friends.

Admittedly, Luna isn’t usually drawn to louder individuals. However, the complexity behind your personality makes it easier for her to know you are much more than what meets the eye.

Speaking of, Luna has a difficult time standing up for herself -- whether it’s because she doesn’t feel a need to or she just doesn’t recognize the meaning behind certain phrases. She NEEDS a friend like you to stand up for her sometimes, and I know you wouldn’t hesitate!

Ranting to Luna is therapeutic to say the least. While her aloofness at times may make it seem as if she isn’t fully paying attention, that couldn’t be further from the truth. She’s actually catching every word, and once you’re done she’ll leave you with a philosophical solution that may seem borderline insane/irrelevant when you first hear it, but it strangely makes sense.

Overall, the lack of judgment from either of you is what draws you together. As a result, you build a unique bond that couldn’t be broken even if either of you wanted it to.

In the Marauders era, I romantically pair you with…

REMUS LUPIN

Let’s be honest, it would take you two so long to ask each other out. You were probably already really close friends, but the insecurities and “what if?” questions from both of you delayed an actual relationship.

When you finally started dating, you were both so relieved. You still share a laugh at how almost nothing changed in the way you interacted with each other.

While with mutual friends, Remus sometimes likes to sit back and just watch you, especially when you get really talkative because this is when you become the most expressive. He has the softest smile when you’re actively cracking jokes, discussing something you’re passionate about, or even calling someone out. Sometimes you may be too distracted to notice, but other times you’ll catch him.

“What?”

“Oh, nothing.” (While that same soft smile never leaves his face.)

You both hold really high standards for yourself in terms of school, so expect late-night study/work sessions to be your best bet for quality time.

Though the occasional instance of walking through/lying on the grounds becomes a favorite for both of you.

Remus listens when you’re particularly struggling through anxiety or strong emotions, but he has to consciously stop himself from interrupting because he can’t stand how he feels knowing you’re going through a tough time.

All he wants to do is soothe you during these moments. If you’re comfortable, he’ll hold you while speaking to you in a soft voice. Remus, the intellectual that he is, is also your best chance at finding a reasonable solution. So if you're not in the mood for calming words, he's also a great person to turn to for answers.

As for your ambitions, no matter what you choose to pursue, you already know Remus is going to be your biggest source of support every step of the way. He’s more than happy to help in any way he can!

Overall, Remus appreciates you, and he’s always going to make sure you know it.

As a friend, I think you’d best be matched with…

LILY EVANS

Lily especially connects to you because you manage to be determined, competitive, and intelligent without sacrificing your kindness, which is something she can relate to.

You and Lily are the C.E.O.s of doing the right thing. Neither of you hesitates to back the other up when it comes to confronting someone because you know it’s justified.

As perceptive as Lily is, you never need to tell her when something is bothering you. All it takes is a quick glance before she puts whatever she’s doing on hold to check in with you.

The reverse works as well. Typically, Lily really doesn’t internally struggle too much, and when she does she tries to hide it. You’re one of the only people who can see right through whatever she tries to pull.

The constant banter between you two is unmatched, but you both know it's because you really care about each other.

Overall, you and Lily have each other’s backs through anything, even when the other isn’t actively asking for help.

[wellthatwasaletdown]

"since we've established that harry is corporate fraud, which male rising popstar do you think actually has the potential and artistry to be the next rockstar?" I really don't think there's anyone that comes to mind? But it's hard to think of any young musician who feels like they're truly bringing it. How many Clash's are there? How many Queen's? How many MJ's or Prince's? I want an Amy Winehouse who feels like they were singing close to the bone, but there's almost nobody./

Yk I've always felt weird when our older generations telling us there's no real music now until solo Harry's rise. I realise it's true because apart from lacking talent he literally has no substance or core personality that we can hold onto. I can tolerate every other popstar currently because they all have something inside of them that's interesting but Harry is just bland and with HS3 I feel like he'd get more bigger. The popular artists of the past were also the most talented but now most of the talented artists are not mainstream.

👆🏻

[wsxhyuk]

hello hello! i’m here to bring you one of the first soloists that wishbone had and an absolutely trash of a person, but fantastically charismatic soloist, music producer, lyricist, rapper and vocal, jeong jaehyuk. he’s a jack of all trades, master of none (save for his production of music, rapping and singing) with a bit of an anger streak and anger issues that he’s been learning over the years to handle. darkly charismatic and with a open history due to a big scandal that he had few months into being introduced when he was in yuseong as one of the trainees to debut, hyuk is a performer with a 150% effort and attitude, living like he can burn out in a single day and not live to see the next sunrise tomorrow. incorrigible, possessive and with a slightly petty streak, he’s not one to pull his punches with anyone that offends him, though he’s been taming himself under wishbone’s watchful eye until more recently. call him a cesspool of moral filth or a festering pool of toxicity, he’s as deeply insecured behind his antagonistic nature, and has worked ten times as hard to get himself to where he kinda is in right now.

both he and wishbone has played into the image of the bad boy of the group for him, especially after his first scandal back before he joined wishbone, and he plans to make the most of it, especially with the reins now loosened on his end. he’s spent quite the time being a tamed tiger, and isn’t going to hesitate upon wreaking havoc once he’s been let loosened.

do hit the like button if you’d like to plot with him, and i’ll pop into your discords / dms! hyuk’s a muse that i prefer brainstorming for instead of having plots ahead of time, so feel free to go ahead and throw anything in his direction when we discuss! everythingfrom his background to his career can be found all consolidated in his profile!

profile 

about stuff : (tw: abandonment, anger issues, violence)

he says he doesn’t have parents, which is partially true, considering he spent almost all of his life in the foster care system, until he aged out at 18. being bounced around from foster house to foster house in the adoption system didn’t do well for his own personality and view about himself, and he came away with a really bad anger streak and violent tendencies, especially when someone tries to poke him / agitates him.

if he wasn’t an idol, hyuk would have gone on to do some petty crimes, because prior to the age of 13 (when he was casted for his face), he was sliding towards the dark side of the law, running from school, getting into street fights, doing little things that never set a juvenile record, but still wasn’t all that clean either.

he was casted one day when running away from school when he was 13 (his results needless to say were trash), and was offered a contract because of his face. his company was looking for someone with similar vibes to his own, and was willing to train him as long as he remained committed to the trainee path. he took up the offer with the insistence of his then foster mother--the orphanage’s owner, who honestly couldn’t wait to get rid of him, due to all the trouble he made.

so jaehyuk became a yuseong trainee just through a scrape of luck--his rapping skills were pretty okay, and so were his vocals, and they felt as though they could polish him more if he did became a trainee, and so he started 3 years of his trainee life in yuseong. being a trainee actually directed a lot of his excess energy from his angered self into his personal commitment to master a single thing--and he eventually became known amongst trainees as one of the most competitive, even if he wasn’t the best at what he did.

he was like a blackhole, constantly desperate to learn, and when he learned something, he was equally as desperate to master it, just doing things in the way that he knew how to do--and that was to knock on it until he either punched a hole through and understood it, or the door opened on itself for him. rapping became that particular outlet that he felt he moderately achieved some success with, but it wasn’t enough.

hungry for more he turned his eyes to producing, composing, even took acting classes and variety classes, just to fill that gaping hole of inadequacy that he felt made him out to be just not enough. while he knows he’s not the best, he’s proud of his unique vision for performance, and is pretty insistent about his artistic vision, which he gradually found a talent for.

but well. its not enough. he wanted--no he needed more.

and so when he turned 16, yuseong finally felt he was ready, esp since he was known to be one of the most rounded and talented trainees in yuseong back then, due to the vocal and rapping skills he gained through hard work. 

funny thing is: just after he was slated to debut together with crescent, he lands himself in hot water for a violence scandal, having punched a male bystander in anger. yuseong was chagrined enough to put him on notice and probation for a while, and desperate to claim back a bit of a credibility, a press conference was held for him to apologise publically.

hyuk abandoned his pride (for various personal reasons as well) that day and went on his hands and knees in front of the reporters, apologising for his scandal and promising to be a better person. unfortunately, that sealed quite a lot of opportunities for him from his company.

due to his scandal, much of his history and background became publically disclosed  to the public--thus rendering it open knowledge that hyuk was an orphan (abandoned by his mother), and from the foster care system, with a slight history of not going well in school etc.

however this wasn’t enough, even though hyuk laid very low for the longest period of time, and he was kicked from yuseong one bright fine day, with nothing but the clothes on his back, his old guitar and second handed music production home studio. 

he would spend the next 6 years polishing up his instrumental skills, busking around EVERYWHERE and anywhere that wanted him, and putting up his self produced music on his soundcloud, under the name jae.de. 

eventually his infamy lessened, and instead more people started to appreciate his vocals and his rapping (the former which he performed the most live when he busked, and the latter, recorded at the goshiwon he stayed in for 3 years.) 

he has a small loyal following on his soundcloud for his music : musical references ( here , here and here .

when he was busking late in 2017, he was scouted once more by wishbone, and the first thing he told them was that he wanted maximum creative freedom for ALL of his work, which they granted him, in exchange for him going to constant therapy for his anger issues. 

he was on the pre-debut rapping single DDING, debuting in 2018 soon after it was released, this was the first official song which he co-produced, and wrote the lyrics for. the song contained satirical lyrics towards the the idol industry, and it marked the start of his lyrics being very direct, crude and yet catchy. 

Daechwita came next. he enjoyed the concept for that the most, before falling back to remind everyone once again that he was damn capable of singing with D (Half Moon). 

he’s willing to teach people how to play instruments, but he’s not particularly...patient. he knows how to play the piano, keyboard, guitar, bass, drums and electric guitar.

he has a 3 month old puppy that he named nameless because he couldn’t decide a name. 

he always dyes his hair / bleaches it so it’s a wonder how his scalp has survived all these years.

VOCAL CLAIMS / SIMILARITIES : DEAN, PENOMECO,  DPR LIVE, kim taehyung (v) [slight similarity in the low vocal tones & jazzy vibes], Gaho, Kwon Jiyong [ note that his vocal style varies a lot since he learned a lot of different methods of singing from almost everywhere, rather than your usual trainee places. his foundation still lies in a very idol-like style of singing, but over the 9 years, the stuff he’s learned through his 6 years of learning alone has eclipsed his idol foundation] 

RAPPING CLAIMS / SIMILARITIES: Min Yoongi (Suga), Kwon Jiyong, PENOMECO, ZICO, ZION.T, BOBBY, Loopy

his image is not particularly clean and bright, instead he’s known for the nitty gritty stuff, of which most of his fans have taken to his bad boy image, liking to imagine him to a particular trope because of his apparently rather handsome face.

some plot ideas:

he’s a lone wolf by nature, and so he has little (only 2) friends around him, unless you’re mostly from yuseong and have trained with him for a set amount and a good period of time. these are the people that know him the best, who sees past that angry battered child inside of him to the blackhole that’s yearning for approval and desperate to make himself feel whole again. they’ve seen his self destructive tendencies, watched him careen over the edge and violently fall, do things that he knows clearly isn’t good for him and then suffer the repercussions all over again. 

exes, flings, fwbs : god, he has so many. none of them are consistent, and none of them last between a month to two months really. he simply treats them as if there’s no option of anything further beyond just the wrestle of bodies in bedsheets, and the fierce scratch of his nails against their backs. more often than not, its not him that gets hurt, because he has the tendency to leave before anything further happens. has he fallen for any of them before? probably not. only one, really. don’t get your hopes up, he tells them with a cigarette dangling from his lips and puffs of smoke in the air. because he’s just nothing but the biggest jerk when it comes to feelings and relationships.

the bad influence: he does a lot of vices, from smoking to drinking, to just..a lot of things that most people won’t attempt to try, chasing after that fleeting moment of a thrill and desire. perhaps you’re looking for a kindred spirit who likes the thrill of danger as you do, or you’d like him to spoil you for the worse things in life, open a door to destroy and ruin you completely just like he feels that he’s done to himself.

rivals: ...yeah i don’t think i need to say more, because he’s someone that rises up to the challenge so fully and completely its almost as if he’s itching to have a fight or a challenge. perhaps he’s punched you before, or you differ in your philosophies and values, one way or another, it’s hyuk’s fault that he’s offended you, and you’re both just going to go down because of it.

fans: you were a fan of him before that, when he faded back into obscurity after his scandal. perhaps you were one of the loyal few that listened to all of his soundcloud productions and heard of his busking sessions and gigs. the saddest thing is that he’s just very...bad with interactions :’) or else he wouldn’t be known infamously as the worst person to have on a variety show. he’s not known to do much fanservice for his fans--his fanservice is equated to his music, and perhaps you have a few things that you wanna teach him about it, even if he doesn’t want to learn. 

instruments / music production: you’ve admired a bit of his skills in music production / instruments, and you want to learn a bit more on how to polish your skills / have a little help in that area...it’s just a matter of convincing him a little to help out because he wants something in exchange, and says that nothing in this world is free.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST CONGRATS ON MAKING IT TO THE END 

here’s a reward for you-

[bestringtoneinfo]

The disappearance of the idol series that once "stormed" for a while: "The fan attraction tree" from Super Junior to the legendary boygroup leader are all regrettable.

There are many unexpected disappearances of Kpop idols that make fans still regretful to this day.

Any K-pop fan can understand how heartbreaking it feels to have a member announce his departure from his favorite group. In particular, this is even more sad when that artist decides to completely withdraw from the music industry, from here fans will hardly have the opportunity to listen to their voice or watch their idol perform on stage. again.

There have been many unexpected cases like that, which still leave fans with regret. Here are the male idols that once received the love of the fan community but for various reasons "disappeared" from the Kpop music industry.

1. Dongho (former U-KISS member)

U-KISS is a group oriented mainly in Japan. This group debuted in Korea in 2008 and was once considered the most expensive group when the transfer price was 150 billion won (nearly 3 trillion VND), belonging to both Korean and Japanese companies.

Receiving such a certain amount of attention, in 2013 when the management company NH Media announced that Dongho - a member with a handsome appearance and was dubbed the dream male god of many young girls at that time, When he announced his departure from the group, fans were extremely alarmed.

But even more unexpected was that he decided to leave the entertainment industry altogether. In 2015, when he was only 21 years old, Dongho suddenly announced his marriage and had his first son. However, only 3 years later, there was information that the former U-KISS member had divorced.

These flashy private life stories have put Dongho in a unique male idol position in Kpop: Male idol gets married at the youngest age and is the fastest male idol to divorce. At that time, many fangirls regretted Dongho's departure.

2. Choi Sungmin (former SPEED member)

True to the name of the group, SPEED's period of operation is also very "speedy" when it is encapsulated in only 4 years. Debuted in 2012, but in 2016, the group officially announced their disbandment.

SPEED belongs to the same former management company of T-ara and is one of the two subgroups of the once-popular mixed boy group Coed School. This is probably the group that has the most "staff" changes in Kpop with the continuous departure of members and at the same time many new entries.

Sungmin is the name that puts an end to the group's many member changes. In 2016, Sungmin signed a contract with Star Camp 202 to pursue his passion for acting. Since then, the name SPEED has officially disappeared from the entertainment industry. Sungmin once appeared in the popular drama School 2017.

Sungmin is the name that puts an end to the group's many member changes. In 2016, Sungmin signed a contract with Star Camp 202 to pursue his passion for acting. Since then, the name SPEED has officially disappeared from the entertainment industry. Sungmin once appeared in the popular drama School 2017.

3. Moon Heejun (former member of H.O.T)

H.O.T is considered the legendary group of Kpop, who have created a great influence and become the standard and milestone for other boybands later. The leader of H.O.T at that time, Moon Heejun, also received a lot of love and attention from fans.

After the group disbanded in 2001, Moon Heejun stayed under the management company SM Entertainment and debuted as a solo artist. He released 3 albums before officially leaving the company and starting his mandatory military service.

Some time later, Heejun participated as an MC for the KFN Korea Army Broadcast show and released 2 more albums. However, now he decided to work as a host and no longer participate in music activities. Fans will hardly have the opportunity to listen to the voice or watch the legendary former leader of the K-pop group that paved the way that day standing on stage.

4. Alexander Lee (former U-KISS member)

Alexander Lee was once a member who was noticed by his foreign language talent, he could speak 7 languages. Although he once continued his solo career after leaving the group in 2011 and achieved certain achievements, the name Alexander Lee was no longer so prominent in the music world.

The male idol's last musical product was in 2015, since then he has been more active as an actor and presenter.

5. L.Joe (former TEEN TOP member)

TEEN TOP has received attention when debuting because in the group there are two members who used to be child actors, Ricky and Niel. However, the group's career is not too prominent for many reasons. In particular, the fact that L.Joe left the group was also one of the deciding factors.

In 2017, L.Joe filed a lawsuit against the management company TOP Media to terminate its operation. Although the contract is still valid until January 2018, the male idol has stopped all activities with the group and focused on pursuing an acting career.

The guy has encountered a lot of obstacles from the company from the case of leaving this group. Most recently, L.Joe has appeared in films such as Entertainer, Let's Eat 3, as well as the plays The Summer, The Zoo or Yeodo.

6. Kibum (former Super Junior member)

For Kpop fans now, when it comes to the visual representative of boy group Super Junior, everyone will probably immediately think of Donghae or "Maya" Siwon. However, does anyone know that Super Junior used to have another famous beauty representative, receiving great love from the fan community?

Kibum used to be the youngest brother of this populous group and was also known as a "fans-catcher" for a while because of his extreme beauty. The guy possesses a pure beauty with a sweet smile that makes many girls "lose their hearts".

In 2015, before Kibum's announcement of leaving the group, many fans were sad and regretful. Kibum then pursued an acting career and is currently not active in the entertainment industry. But with E.L.F., the male artist's beauty has never been overshadowed in everyone's mind.

7. Byungho (former member of 24K)

24K debuted in 2012 but in the same year, a member of the group, Byungho, announced that he would leave the group due to chronic back pain. However, after that, there were a lot of rumors circulating that the reason he actually stopped working was because he was secretly married and had children.

The rumors were increasingly confirmed when the management company admitted that they could not contact the male idol and many people saw his family photos on social networks. Finally, Byungho officially announced that he left the group to take care of his personal life and spend time with his family. Since leaving 24K, Byungho has almost completely retired from the entertainment industry, without any more notable news about this guy.

See More: Download free ringtones for your mobile phone with ringtones from the best songs 2021 continuously updated at the website https://bestringtone.info/

[baka-monarch]

It’s A Small World: Prologue

Summery: Roman is Virgil’s high school bully, and finally regrets his actions on the last day of school. Virgil is a size shifter that is happy that he won’t ever have to see his high school bullies again... right?

TRIGGER WARNINGS: CUSSING, MENTIONED HOMOPHOBIA, ALCOHOL, SMOKING, PENIS MENTION, BULLYING

Virgil had never been the type of person to stand out, to be looked at in awe, or envious of. He had always stayed in the back and stayed quiet, nobody knew him as anything more than the Wannabe Emo. 

And he was perfectly happy keeping it that way.

At least until he got a scholarship to Hamilton University.

It was true that Virgil didn't have much of a talent, but when it came to writing he excelled. In fact, the few times that he'd reveled in attention were whenever he won a competition because of his writing. Before he was even a Senior he was taking college-level courses for his writing capabilities, and when he'd gotten his letter from Hamilton University about a scholarship his brother had decided it was time to celebrate. The plan was that on the last day of high school his brother Patton and their boyfriend would take him to a My Chemical Romance concert that just so happened to land on that same day.

At least, that was the plan.

●●●

Virgil sat in the back of class ebbing with excitement. It was the last class of the day and he could not wait to get it over with. His knee bounced anxiously as he watched the clock tick away, closer and closer to the bell of release. He wished it would go faster but with the teacher droning on and everyone being quite instead of being stupid, it made it seem like time was going much slower. Eventually he just released a tired sigh as he finally actually looked down at his paper to work, unfortunately at that same moment the bell finally rang making him jump in surprise. As everyone ran out of the classroom Virgil took a moment to collect himself before he grabbed his things and left, rushing to his locker.

Roman was skipping class before the bell rang. Him, the other jocks, and all the hot girls at school were hanging out in the boy’s bathroom getting busy. Chad had brought a Bluetooth speaker and was playing music from his Spotify playlist, while Heather had somehow snuck in alcohol, and Karen was passing around cigarettes and vapes. At the moment Roman was trying to avoid all of them, luckily Jerry and Tom were busy comparing penises, and although Roman wasn’t interested, watching them was better than getting drunk, high, or being around everyone who was drunk and high. Roman did have a few thoughts about seeing the males pantsless, but he dismissed them because he's straight, right? This party was meant to be a farewell to Roman, the most popular man at their high school, and yet, Roman himself hated the party but it was for him and his girlfriend was having fun, so he just couldn’t leave. So, Roman stuck to his little corner of the bathroom, waiting for the bell to ring. Luckily for him, it finally did and he rushed out of there with Heather merrily trailing behind him.

As Roman was leaving, Virgil was just finishing up getting everything out of his locker. Roman was ready to just leave and forget about the bullied emo all together, but Heather had other plans. Virgil jumped back as his locker was suddenly slammed shut, the bitchy, makeup covered face of the culprit standing where the door once was.

“What’s up emo freak.” Heather spat. Virgil glared at her, but he wasn’t in the mood to deal with a bitch today, so he just turned and went to try and walk away. “Nu uh, you little fucker. It’s time for you to get your farewell present! Isn’t that right Roman?” She held Virgil’s arms tightly behind his back, preventing him from moving as he was forced to face the jock. Virgil just focused on the ground silently as he waited for whatever was about to happen.

“C’mon Heather, it’s not worth it. Let’s just go home.” Roman tried to reason with her.

“Aw, Ro-Ro, y’know we can’t do that.” She whined. “He needs something to remember this day by, just like everyone else.” She said this in such a sickeningly sweet voice that Virgil wanted to gag.

“Like what? Heather, I really just wanna go home.” It was true, Roman was tired and just didn’t want to deal with emo fucker today.

“Well how about…” Heather took a few moments to think about it, looking Virgil over and making him shiver. Finally her eyes landed on a little piece of paper that was sticking out of Virgil’s pocket. “This!” She exclaimed as she pulled Virgil’s MCR concert ticket out of his hoodie.

“Hey!” Virgil cried out when he saw what she had, and finally started struggling.

“Woah, calm down emo. What the fuck is it?” Roman said, and Heather happily handed it to him as she held Virgil back.

“Let me go!” He struggled.

“My Chemical Romance?” Roman read the ticket. He didn’t know that they were in concert right now. Maybe if he got home fast enough he could get his own ticket?

“You mean that lame emo band!?” Heather cackled. Roman flinched at her response, they were his favorite band… he’d forgotten that they were seen as an emo thing.

“Uh, yeah…” Roman mumbled out. He took a moment to then look at emo freak in a new light. For the first time Roman noticed how his hoodie was hand made with amazing craftsmanship,  the small bit of makeup he was wearing was applied with the precision of an artist, and his purple fringe actually looked really cool. Why had Roman bullied this guy again?

 “Let’s tear it up.” Heather’s voice cut through Roman’s thoughts.

“What?” Was all Roman said as Virgil paused in his struggling enough to watch as Heather snatched the ticket out of Roman’s hands and tore it to shreds. At this point she had let go of Virgil, but it didn’t matter as he stared down at the shreds of paper that were once his ticket, he could feel hot tears forming in his eyes, not only that but his size seemed to get a little smaller. Roman looked back and forth between the once-was ticket and emo freak, full of regret. 

Heather cackled as Virgil finally snapped out of his trance and ran out the doors shoving his way past Roman. “That’s right! Run run run away you emo freak!” She yelled after him.

“Why would you do that?” Roman snapped at her.

“What? It’s not like it’s any worse than the things you’ve done to him.” She shrugged making Roman flinch. He had done some pretty bad shit to emo freak throughout high school. “Besides, it’s the last day of school, it’s not like you’ll ever see him again.” Roman shook his head angrily as he finally ran after emo freak. If they weren’t going to see each other again, he should at least try to apologize now.

As Roman burst through the school’s front doors he looked around, trying to find emo freak. Yet they were nowhere to be seen. “Shit…” He muttered. He’d fucked up. Now he could never take it back.

Virgil watched silently as the scene unfolded. He was surprised when Roman finally drove off without Heather, but it didn’t matter. No one could see Virgil right now. Why? Well because he was four inches tall hiding under a bush. This was a common occurrence, as Virgil was a size shifter, meaning that he could change how big or small he was. Unfortunately this ability was tied to his emotions, and having anxiety did not help that. Mainly because every time he had an attack he would shrink down as a flight response.

Luckily for Virgil his phone shrank down with him, so he sent a quick text to his older brother to come pick him up. He felt guilty for interrupting his brother from hanging out with their significant other, like they always did, but he didn’t really have much else to do. His brother was only a few minutes away so it didn’t take long for a black corvette (which he already knew belonged to his brother’s lover) to pull up.

Patton quickly got out of the passenger’s seat and approached the bush he knew Virgil was under, spotting his little brother immediately.  “Oh Virgil…” He said sympathetically. “What happened?” Patt carefully crouched down and offered Virgil his hand with a practiced ease.

Virgil quickly clamored onto his brother’s hand as he explained everything. Patton comforted him as he carried him to the car. Janus (Patton’s lover) had long since installed a tiny car seat in their cup holder for situations like this. They waited patiently for Virgil to get situated before they started driving again. “You can have my ticket kiddo, and you can go with Janus.”

Jan nodded. “Or you can have my ticket, whichever you prefer, kid.” Janus conceded.

“I’ll go with you Jan, I know that Pat doesn’t like MCR that much.” Virgil shrugged.

“And look on the bright side, kid, it’s the last day of school. You don’t ever have to worry about those fuckers again.” Jan said.

“Janus!” Patton scolded as he smacked their arm, making them chuckle.

Yeah, Virgil though. I don’t ever have to see them again, right?

chapter one