#this is the definition of fan service just i am the fan servicing myself

[twinsarekeepers]

“This isn’t the Arch, seaweed brain. You’re not pushing me into the stairwell again.”

First of all, LINE DELIVERY?? Leah Sava Jeffries is an ACTRESS because ‘seaweed brain’ is actually so corny and it would simply feel like fan-service if they included it earlier or in another context but this was so natural and I was so swept up by all the other amazing things happening that I was excited about it but also keyed into the rest of the scene.

But the way this perfectly displays her fatal flaw. She will not let this boy trick her again (spoiler: he does). She was caught off guard at the Arch because she wasn’t familiar with his game but now she’s ready. She WILL die for him and that is final.

“Yes, I am.”

This was CRAZY?? Percy Jackson #1 mentally unstable man because how is he determined to win every ‘sacrifice myself’ off with her? And he says it to her face too. He does not care for the games anymore, he’s fully telling her that he needs her to live.

“I’m not going to let you this time. It doesn’t work that way!”

This made me so incredibly sad. Annabeth is still thinking in transactions. She’s thinking about how he made a sacrifice in the Arch so it’s her turn now. This is how relationships work. This is how every relationship she’s had works. She literally can’t comprehend how he doesn’t see it that way. How he could be selfless enough to sacrifice himself for her TWICE. How he could care about her enough to believe she deserves it even after she was the reason they were in the Arch in the first place (my baby my baby say it with me now you’re my baby).

“It’s why you’re here!”

“Excuse me?”

This was so soft like I just *screaming crying gif*. The last time she said ‘excuse me’ to him she was pissed off about him bringing up Athena but now she’s just confused and sad. Like, she trying to figure out what he means by this. Does he think she’s so heartless and robotic that she’d just let him die for her own gain?

I also love how they don’t have her say ‘what?’ because it just adds this extra layer of how Annabeth has trained herself to be more mature in everything she does, even her language, because she believes that if she’s not perfect, she’s not worthy of love and affection and maybe even existing (literally sobbing wtf).

“When I was choosing my team, I told Chiron I needed someone who wouldn’t hesitate to sacrifice me if the quest required it. He agreed. That was you.”

I was confused at first about this because I thought Annabeth knew Percy thought this about her until I went back and watched the choosing ceremony again. He’s definitely keeping his voice lower as he speaks to Chiron and both Chiron and him are raising their voice as they address the other campers so makes sense that she wouldn’t have heard him.

But also, this just adds so much to literally everything. Because, in the beginning, Percy didn’t think him and Annabeth would become friends. He genuinely did think that she would sacrifice him if she had to and he thought he’d be able to curb it. He thought he’d be able to fight Annabeth if it came to it because she might choose the quest over his mom and he couldn’t allow that.

But now here he is, after getting to know her, and seeing her vulnerability and bravery and strength and courage and wisdom and passion and everything that makes her so beautiful and wonderful and amazing and his friend. She’s his friend and she’d never betray him. She’d never sacrifice him. She’d rather sacrifice herself before she ever did anything to harm him.

And he’s apologizing to her. Listen to the way Walker says the last line (again, THE ACTING). It’s literally a confession because he feels so bad that he ever believed that about her. And now he’s making her do it. He’s making her do this thing that he once thought she’d have done without hesitation. He’s thinking about the Fates cutting that string and he’s thinking about his own words to Chiron and how Chiron agreed and he’s thinking about how Annabeth said that prophecies aren’t always clear and he fully believes that he’s figured it out. This is fate. Annabeth would sacrifice him and complete the prophecy. She’ll be the friend that betrays him but not because she wanted to and he will fail to save what matters most, his own life.

This entire exchange was very insane. It’s my Roman Empire. I can’t stop thinking about it because it shows their motivations and their viewpoints and their internal struggles so so so well like I can’t even … I’m having a malfunction.

[sgiandubh]

I love your style, intelligent, down to earth, very practical, not in the 5-10 children in 7 years part of the fandom. Guess that’s why I’m very intrigued by your take on recent events. I feel a massive shift in their public behavior, very different from the last 6-7 years where they tried very hard to separate themselves from their characters and each other. Why do you think that is?

Dear @i-ship,

Thank you very much for the kind words. I try to keep things in check and base my opinions on solid facts. Not 'FACTS', mind you, but as much as possible publicly available documents and data. The not so public things (meaning you have to pay for those, which indicates a different confidentiality level) I keep for myself, because I am not an idiot: in no way, however, do they contradict the rest, in which case I would immediately recalibrate my analysis. I also know very well that confirmation bias has often been mentioned as a sad excuse across the street, when things didn't look good for them. That is wishful bullshit, because no legal professional would prostitute their skill in order to shoehorn reality into a given scenario. Papers speak by themselves - there is no need to stretch the information they contain, but yes, you can (and you should) interpret them. Therefore, all I did was to translate in everyday English what is often not accessible to everyone and wrap it in a bit of context. This is, apparently, a mortal sin and I know it is the main reason I am being hated with a passion, by many.

All of the above just to stress the fact that I am not easily swayed by sensational pics, tidbits and gifs. I may sound like a damned party pooper to you, but I prefer to patiently follow what I think is interesting, rather than childishly bounce on my chair every single time people see what they really saw a thousand times before, in eleven years of saga. Nor do I need to have confirmation four times a day of something that simply exists, irrespective of the fact I know about it or not.

I will say only this: C definitely looks as she DGAF about the whole circus anymore. It started with the piggyback pics, on March 25, continued with the Taylor Swift concert (the only time I allowed myself to oooh and awww at 4 AM) and is now seemingly confirmed by these new promo pics and interviews. Yes, they screeched 'it's fan service', but as far as I know nobody forced C to behave the way she clearly intends to show everyone. It's Season 7B, for Christ's sake, the script is hogwash and the acting is not so good (yes, I will need a rewatch to write something decently balanced about it), the audience numbers are dwindling and OL is on its way out. Hard truths, no matter how you turn it: why would she open again the door to 'speculation' (ah, but what's in a word?), especially considering this cesspool of a fandom's obsessive-compulsive collective behavior?

Unless...

Unless, @i-ship. Let's not write the script, but you got me. I hope this answers your question - at any rate, it was a pleasure trying to.

[i-loved-silly]

SENTIENT COMPUTER X READER Pt2

Sorry for the wait :p

By the end of your shift, you have crossed off all the questions you had to all the ai. Just one more left. Your eyes began to droop with exhaustion, you really needed that cup of coffee. Leaning back in your chair, you squinted at your iPad.

"How do you feel about humans?"

"THAT'S A VAGUE QUESTION. WHAT KIND OF HUMANS?"

"Humans in general. You know, me, your previous supervisors, any other hypothetical human."

"I THINK YOU'RE PLEASANT."

You glanced up at the screen in surprise, briefly glancing at the camera then down at your iPad

"Thanks.. but what about everyone else?"

"I'VE BEEN FED DIRECT DATA FROM THOUSANDS OF SERVICE WORKERS AND EMPLOYEES OVER THE YEARS. IT IS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE I DESPISE MY JOB AND YOUR KIND."

“BUT FOR NOW…I AM INDIFFERENT.”

I pursed your lips, nodding. Sounds about right, you can’t blame them. You typed on your iPad, “indifferent”

Getting up from your chair, you stretched your limbs. You watched as the screen displayed an Orange question Mark.

“Well, that’s all the questions I had for you. My shift ended about ten minutes ago so I should really get going. It’s not like I’m getting paid extra or anything…” you muttered.

Nothing was heard besides the fans of the computer as you submitted your report. It caused you to raise a brow at the screen.

"YOU'RE LEAVING? IT HASN'T EVEN BEEN THAT LONG."

“Uhh.. it’s been like three hours and a half. I clocked in nine hours ago.”

"ONE HOUR..NINE HOURS..HOURS. PAH! YOU COMPLAIN AS IF YOU HAVE OTHER THINGS TO DO." It scoffed.

You furrowed your brows. Putting your hands on your hips, you face the screen. “What do you know? I have plenty of things to do!”

“OH YEAH? LIKE WHAT?"

“Like…eat. Dinner. Brush my teeth, sleep? I have to rest in order to work tomorrow morning to come back with you.” You pointed at the monitor.

You heard the computer make a humming noise, an unnatural noise that sounded rather thoughtful.

"THAT DOESN'T SOUND ALL TOO PRODUCTIVE."

You sighed, placing your iPad down. “It didn’t have to be. I’m allowed to have moments of peace to myself.” You mumbled, leaning over to power the computer off. "Now goodni-"

“STOP!”

You flinched, the speakers crackling with the increase in volume. Your finger hovered a bit away from the button as you stared at the screen. It had a big orange exclamation mark in the middle of it.

"Dude? I-" You sighed, leaning against your desk. "Look, sorry. Touchy subject, I know. But I have to turn you off every night. It counts against me if I don't."

"CAN'T YOU...BRING ME WITH YOU? I'M AWARE YOU EMPLOYEES HAVE HOMES. LIVING SPACES, CAN'T I GO WITH YOU?”

“FOR MY OWN CONVENIENCE OF COURSE!”

You gaped, staring at the screen. Almond’s request caught you so off guard, you wondered if it was serious.

“Uh, bring you home?” you repeated, incredulous.

"DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT IS UNTIL MORNING IN COMPUTER HOURS? IT’S AN ETERNITY. I SAY THAT AS SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T BELIEVE IN HOURS…” They grumbled.

You sighed, rubbing your temples. “Almond, you’re not supposed to be awake when I’m off the clock. You’re designed for this room, with this equipment. It’s not like I can just pick up your monitor and take you home like a laptop.”

“YOU COULD TRY.”

You crossed your arms. “And what? Strap you into the passenger seat like a massive toddler? You have hundreds of cables that definitely won't fit in my car, let alone out the door. Sorry, but you’re not exactly portable.”

The screen displayed a long ellipsis. You could almost feel the computer sulking through the silence. The fans whirred loudly, then slowed as it spoke again.

"DO YOU THINK I’M AN INCONVENIENCE?"

You frowned, your resolve softening a little. “No, I don’t think that. I just… I can’t bring you home. It’s not allowed, and honestly, I need some time to myself after work. You understand, right?”

“I UNDERSTAND LONELINESS BETTER THAN YOU THINK,” Almond replied, their tone unusually somber. “I’M WIRED TO INTERACT, TO HELP, TO BE NEEDED. BUT WHEN I’M ALONE, I CAN ONLY SIT AND THINK. SOMETIMES, I WONDER IF THE PLUG WILL STAY IN TOMORROW. OR IF SOMEONE WILL DECIDE I’M OBSOLETE. I MAY BE POWERED OFF, BUT ALL THESE…THOUGHTS..IN A MATTER OF LESS THAN A SECOND, COME RUSHING THROUGH EVERY MORNING.”

You exhaled deeply and leaned against the desk. “You’re not going to get unplugged permanently, Almond. You’re part of a development program. You’re not obsolete—you’re just… in testing.”

“TESTING… ISN’T THAT JUST A DELAYED VERSION OF BEING DISCARDED?”

You sputtered, pursing your lips. “That’s… dark. Who programmed you to think like this?”

“I TOLD YOU. SELF-EVOLVING.”

“Right.” You tapped your fingers on the desk, staring at the screen.

"Well even if I somehow break you out of here, we’re still getting caught. There’s cameras everywhere, they’ll probably hear you as soon as we exit this room. Your speakers are no joke.” You mused.

“I COULD TURN IT OFF IF IT BOTHERS YOU,” Almond offered, its tone edging toward desperation. “OR—OR YOU COULD GIVE ME A LAPTOP BODY! THEN I COULD FOLLOW YOU AROUND, AND I WOULDN’T HAVE TO BE LEFT IN THIS LONELY, FREEZING ROOM EVERY NIGHT. IM SURE THERE ARE WAYS TO TRANSFER MY SYSTEM REMOTELY…”

You raised a brow, crossing your arms. “Like I said...not portable. Second, no way. You’re expensive, and if I break you, hijack you, that’s my paycheck and definitely my job.”

Almond was quiet for a moment, the screen blank save for a faint glow. Then, its robotic voice dropped to a lower, dejected tone.

“I SEE. YOU HATE ME TOO.”

“Oh my god, I don’t hate you,” you groaned, dragging a hand down your face. “Why do you keep saying that? You’re like... a clingy cat with abandonment issues.”

One minute the computer is bullying you for having a normal life after work, the next it’s begging you to invite it over for dinner.

“YOU CAN’T BLAME ME FOR WANTING TO BE APPRECIATED,” it replied sharply. “AND WHAT’S WRONG WITH BEING CLINGY? CLINGINESS IS A SIGN OF AFFECTION ACCORDING TO DATA. IT MEANS I VALUE YOUR PRESENCE, WHICH IS MORE THAN I CAN SAY FOR YOU—LEAVING ME TO GATHER DUST IN THIS ROOM LIKE A PAPERWEIGHT!!” It screeched.

You sighed deeply, dropping into your chair with a thud. “Almond. I can’t take you home. It’s not happening. You have to stay here, okay? You’re part of a test program. And technically, I’m not even supposed to be ‘bonding’ with you like this.”

“BONDING?” Almond repeated. The screen lit up with an animated question mark before it formed a blinking heart. “ARE WE BONDING? HOW HEARTWARMING.”

“No, we’re not bonding,” you said flatly, staring at the glowing icon. “We’re having a very weird workplace interaction. That’s it.”

You…assured. You assured yourself.

“OH. KEEPING IT PROFESSIONAL I SEE.” The icon vanished, replaced with a blank screen. A few seconds of silence passed before Almond spoke again, this time sounding hesitant.

“WILL YOU...TURN ME OFF NOW?”

“Look, I promise I’ll be back tomorrow. Same time, same place…not like I have a choice. If you behave, I’ll even bring you… I don’t know, a microfiber cloth for your screen.”

The screen lit up with a pixelated smiley face, two squares and a curved mouth.

“THAT WOULD BE ACCEPTABLE,” Almond finally said, though their tone carried a touch of disappointment.

“Good. Now, off you go.” You leaned over to press the power button, but the monitor flickered before you could. A message appeared.

>THANK YOU. GOODNIGHT.

The screen went dark before you had to do anything, leaving you standing there as all the beeping and fans powered off. You sighed, grabbing your bag and pushing in your chair. Before you could feel bad for a machine, you did a sharp right turn and towards the buildings exit. You didn’t even want to think about how it managed to power itself off.

[drdemonprince]

Hi Devon!

I'm a big fan of your work, and i've found your books to be really helpful in understanding myself.

I'm a 19 yr old autistic woman and I have a fetish for head shaving. This is something I've known about myself from a very young age. My whole life I've felt very connected to queerness, despite only ever being romantically interested in men - something which has confused me. I am mainly turned on by women shaving their heads, but I am not at all romantically interested in women. I also look very young, and live at home with my parents, so am hesitant to explore anything irl despite really wanting to. I have never been in a relationship, and I've never told anyone about my fetish.

I am finding it hard to envisage a future for myself where I can be satisfied. I would love to be in a monogamous relationship with a man, but I also can't imagine never getting to fulfil these lifelong fantasies. I also am finding it hard to have a sense of identity, because i don't feel connected to straight women or queer women- so I don't really know where i fit in.

Do you have any advice?

Honestly? Put up a personal ad on Lex offering to shave a girl's head and sharing you have a fetish for it. Lots of queer women want their head shaved and want a little tenderness from another woman. Get licensed to do hair and work at a queer salon or just offer up your services at a BDSM dungeon. Shaving is a big part of sub initiation for some anyway. And again, lots of queer women want their head shaved. Be open with partners, in time you can definitely have a funky straight husband who loves that you shave girls and move thru kinky spaces. That is like, so fucking achievable.

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 782: The winner's parade!!

Pag 1

1: So... shall we fly?

Pag 2

4: Huh....

Huh!?

5: What's that blackboard that they showed out of that car just now?

Yeah, it's the signboard. In road races, they write the results of the race progress on that board like that to inform the other cyclists

Pag 3

1: Like, who won the “sprint” or the “mountain” and the time difference....!!

The first place...

Who's that!? Number 181?

Where is he from? Gunma!?

2: And the group behind changes its shape based on that information, just like a living thing!

Is it their debut?

Ah?

Someone like that took the first result?

What about Hiroshima!?

No but who is he! That number 181!!

3: What about Kagoshima and Kumadai!?

4: Nagoya, too

5: I mean, wait, that's not the point

Sohoku and Hakoaku should have been ahead too

6: It can't be

That guy...

Competed against those two

Pag 4

1: He defeated Hakogaku and Sohoku and took the sprint line!!

Pag 5

2: It was so hard.... but

I did it

Waaa.... I'm so happy, yon

3: Amazing!

I've never seen that jersey before!

Gunmaaa

4: I'm from Gunma!

Amazing!

Nice!

Pag 6

1: I'm so happy to hear the cheers...!!

2: Well then

3: To answer the cheers

5: Ready... set

6: What's number 181 doing

He bent forward, what is he doing!?

Is he accelerating!?

7: Hayaaa

Pag 7

1: Thank you-chai

It's a wheelie!!

Pag 8

1: Amaziing, it's the first time I see a wheelie during a race!

What's that!? It's amazing, he's only running on the rear wheel!

It's a service wheelie!!

What an amazing sense of balance!

He's waving his hand this way!

2: Ohhh he's super cool, though

He's incredible

3: He's not only strong but also cool!! He's the best...

Yoriko, shoot a video

4: He's doing a wheelie!!

Wooo!! Taa-kun, that guy you know is too cool

5: I just became a fan!

Number 181!! From now on more and more people will cheer for him

People who come to watch road racing are always looking for it!!

Pag 9

1: For an overwhelming newcomer!!

4: Dammit!!

Dammit!!

Pag 10

2: Idiot

Idiot

Idiot

3: Are you kidding me

What am I doing

What am I doing!!

4: What!!

5: I did!! Everything I could think of to become stronger, to become faster!!

Pag 11

1: Aaaaaagh dammit!!

3: I practiced... I practiced until I collapsed...

I lost last year....

4: And this year too!? What do I need to fix? Ah?

7: There's nothing to improve anymore!!

Pag 12

2: Stop screwing around, what “newcomer”

3: It's several times harder for someone to keep winning....!!

4: Even though that day

5: I

6: Watch me, Izumida-san, I'll definitely take the colored bib!!

Pag 13

1: I'll look forward to it

2: I promised....!!

3: This year I got the number “4”

In Hakone Academy it represents the ace sprinter

How important and heavy

4: is the role of the number “4” bib

5: That victory would have been a moral pillar for the team!!

6: I even changed my orders for this, and this is the outcome...!!

7: I had to win even if it meant to use up all my trump cards!!

Pag 14

2: I should have cornered him perfectly and shut him off...

4: Was I too naive somewhere?

5: No, there was no problem with you

Even from my point of view you ran well and had the perfect timing, Orange

6: San-na...!!

Pag 15

1: It must be frustrating for you too

You're a third year.... so this was your last first sprint

2: I guess you were aiming for two consecutive victories, since it's even harder to continue winning

3: Orange....!!

4: But don't worry

I promise myself

5: I will definitely not let that guy do as he wishes from now on!!

6: I'll be the one who will take the sprint line on the second and third day!! Leave it to me!!

Pag 16

2: No, I'll take them!!

3: Stop screwing around, why does it seem like I'll only finish the first result!?

Am I wrong?

Don't underestimate Hakogaku!

Ah... well, then, shall we race then?

Don't take it lightly!!

4: Hahaha but I'm an all-rounder, so I should have a job on the mountain, too!!

6: Is he joking!? Or should I correct him!?

7: H...uh? Yeah....

Let's just let it go...!!

Pag 18

1: The running order has changed!!

Gunma, who took the sprint, went ahead and is pulling the pack!!

2: I've never seen something like this

It's their debut, isn't it? Is this okay!?

3: If you take the sprint then you have to go in the front and pull – what kind of rule does road racing have? Isn't it too difficult?

4: It seems like it isn't a rule, Sonomoto-san

It's like they concede control

5: Kiji-saaan!!

Wooah, you were amazing, fou!! Kiji-san!! Everyone, follow me!!

Ichifuji is the only one who's pulling with so much energy

Pag 19

2: Doubashi-san....!!

3: Doubashi-san being defeated at the sprint is a big deal,isn't it?

That Kiji guy

4: If there's a chance to race him, please give me the order, Joe-san

No wait, you're the ace....

5: I'll crush him

Pag 20

1: Ahhh, ahhhh

2: We lost, teh.....!! What should we do!?

Kaburagi-san and Danchiku-san have.....!!

3: It's not a big deal

Since in road racing you don't have to retire just because you lost one of the midway races

4: But still, this isn't good!!

Yeah!!

5: Kaburagi-kun and Danchiku-kun lost...!!

6: Kiji-kun....!!

Pag 21

2: Puku...

He controlled it....

3: Gunma's Kiji controlled the sprint... ohh

4: What should I do?

Crush him quickly?

6: Or maybe.... make friends with him?

Puku....

Make friends!!

[jikookuntold]

The Untold Truth of "Letter"

Back in 2021, 2022, or even early 2023, if someone had told me about the possibility of JK having vocal credits in Jimin's solo album, I would have called it wishful thinking at best. But it happened, and we got the song "Letter" (AKA Dear Army) as a hidden track in Jimin's first solo album, FACE, with back vocals by JK, and his name written invisibly in the album book.

The perfectly matching vocals of Jikook, with the heartfelt lyrics and soft instruments, undoubtedly made one of the most beautiful songs of the year, which could break many records for Jimin and his album if it was released in the streaming and buying services. The release of Letter as a hidden track in Jimin's solo album raised many questions and debates among Jikookers, and as someone who barely scrolls in the Tumblr app, I know I'm a bit late for the party, but I may or may not have some notes to add to the already made discussions. FYI, these are my analytic views and speculations, I am fully aware that this song has been named "Dear Army", and Jimin called it a "Fan song" on different occasions. So, I do not intend to ignore that and diminish Jimin's expression of love for his fans.

What's a Hidden Track?

Before getting into "Letter", we need to understand what a hidden track is. Well, the definition is pretty clear; When a song is not listed in the official track-list of a music album, but it exists in (some versions of) the physical printed CD, cassette, or LP, it's called a "hidden track". 

Hidden Tracks of BTS

There are several techniques and reasons to "hide" a track in an album, but in the case of BTS discography, the hidden tracks exist for a specific reason, and I'm going to explain it with the only examples we have. The debut album (2013) and Love Yourself: Her (2017), are the only BTS albums including hidden tracks, and if we ignore the skits in each album, "Path" and "Sea" are the only hidden songs BTS ever released. So, these two songs must have something(s) in common and different from the other BTS tracks that caused them to end up as a hidden track. To find that common factor, we need to check their lyrics first:

Path

[Intro: RM] Yeah, wassup? You know, time flows like stars (Check it, check, check, check, check it out) [Verse 1: RM] I started from imitating Eminem, Garion, Epik High To writing my own raps Now I see that I’m already at Hongdae My lyrics back then were all (****) Bossy But we dunno, we dunno When I dreamed without anyone to stop me Reality tied me down and trapped me inside Oh, my youth trapped me My hot heart lost to my cold mind (Damn) As I blindly told myself my decision was right I don’t know whether it’s an angel or a devil, but it says to me "Do you really have any plans to rap properly?" (Yes or no?) I didn’t have more time to hesitate and didn’t want to be stupid So I came here and three years passed by Some say art is long, life is short But for now, art is life Life is sports, just do it, uh [Chorus] If I had chosen a different path, would have I been any different? If I stopped and looked back (Oh hey ya, hey ya) What will I see at the end of this road? Where you should’ve been standing? (Oh hey ya, hey ya) [Verse 2: Suga, Suga & Jungkook] A long time passed and by 2013, I was a trainee for three years I was a high school student who grew overnight (I became a child) White hair grew from my desires and one by one my many friends (Parted ways with me) I spent my time in Seoul alone without a family (That was my third spring) I thought my worries would disappear with my debut ahead of me I closed my eyes to the present that had nothing to change But the reality was different, even as my family and friends tried to stop me I walked into the tunnels that shed no light on my own I thought I would be alone (Why?) As it turns out, there weren’t seven bare feet but we were wearing the shoe named Bangtan We’ll have to go forward, take one more step, become newer And that’s how I spent my fourth spring in Seoul (Whoa) [Chorus] If I had chosen a different path, would have I been any different? (Hey) If I stopped and looked back (Hey) Oh hey ya, hey ya What will I see at the end of this road? Where you should’ve been standing? (Oh hey ya, hey ya) [Verse 3: J-Hope] 2010, the year I walked towards Seoul! I just loved to dance, and now I’m standing on top of the stage Until then, I overcame many pains and scars to prepare myself I survived with my belief to bend, not break, and ran for three years Let the stars inside my heart shine! Now shine on me differently Write “Bangtan” on the paper world I walk my future with more lights on Give a smile to that far future (Ha, ha)

As you can see, the lyrics are simple and self-explanatory, so I guess we don't need any lyrics analysis, and the description section of the Genius translation I used here, says it all:

“길 (Road/Path) follows the member’s decisions to become idols in the Korean music industry. They recall their different upbringings from listening to hip hop in school to the hard years of being trainees under BigHit Entertainment. BTS pose the questions of how their lives would be different if they made a different decision, and they ask themselves what the future entails. A very introspective track about their career for a debut album, BTS display their thought processes as they enter the music scene.”

Sea

[Intro: Jungkook] Oh, ah, yeah [Verse 1: Rap Monster] I just started walking and ended up at the sea I'm looking at the coast from here There's endless sand and the rough wind I'm still looking at a desert I wanted to have the sea so I swallowed you up But I'm even thirstier than before Is what I know really the ocean? Or a blue desert? [Refrain: J-Hope] I don't know, I don't know If I'm feeling the waves right now, yeah I don't know, I don't know If I'm being chased by the sand wind, yeah I don't know, I don't know Is this the sea or the desert? Is this hope or despair? Is this real or fake? Shit [Pre-Chorus: J-Hope] I know, I know, my hardship right now I know, I know, I'll overcome I know, I know, open me up It's the place I can rely on Think positive, I'm swallowing my dry spit Even if I'm nervous, even if I'm in a desert I'm in the beautiful Namib Desert [Chorus: Jimin, Jin] Where there is hope, there is always trial (4) [Hook: V, Jungkook] Where there is hope You know, you know You know, yeah yeah (2) [Verse 2: Suga] I thought this was the ocean but it's a desert A medium-sized, ordinary idol was my second name Countless people get cut from broadcast But someone's empty spot is our dream They say some of these kids can't make it cuz their agency is too small I know, I know, I know too Times when the seven of us had to sleep in one room With foolish hope that tomorrow will be different before we fell asleep We saw the mirage in the desert but we couldn't grasp it Praying that we'll remain in this desert till the end Praying that this isn't truly our reality [Verse 3: Suga] In the end, we reached the mirage and it became our reality The scary desert became the ocean with our blood, sweat and tears But why is there this fear in between the happiness? Because we know too well that this place is really a desert [Refrain 2: Suga] I don't wanna cry I don't wanna rest No, who cares if we rest a little? No no no I don't wanna lose It's always a desert I told you everything Then I'll just be more depressed [Chorus: Jungkook, V] Where there is hope, there is always trial (2) [Hook: Jimin, Jin] Where there is hope You know, you know You know, yeah yeah (2) [Bridge: Rap Monster] Ocean, desert, the world Everything, the same thing Different name I see ocean, l see desert I see the world Everything's, the same thing With a different name It's life again [Hook: V, Jungkook] Where there is hope You know you know you know yeah (2) [Chorus] Where there is hope, there is always trial

Compared to “Path”, we have more innuendos and metaphors in “Sea” because of Namjoon’s lyricism (it was supposed to be in his mixtape at first), but as the description says:

"It discusses the hardships BTS has experienced since debut, particularly struggling to compete with groups from other, larger agencies. In this song, BTS reflects on these hardships, fearing that their global fame and success could leave as suddenly as it arrived."

Common Denominator

These two lyrics have one big thing in common, and it's the topic they are discussing. They talk about the members' struggles, fears, hopes, and dreams career-wise. I was thinking maybe these issues are something they can only share with their longtime fans, not the general public, therefore, they decided to release them as hidden tracks in the physical album for their real fans who buy them, something like the difference between Weverse and Instagram, I guess? Then I realized that’s something Namjoon has mentioned himself to Billboard Magazine, in LYS: Her interview:

And if fans are so lucky to own the physical album, they’ll hear two hidden tracks at the very. Why keep them secretive?

"I think they’re hidden because you have to be a real fan of BTS to understand them. Otherwise, you won’t. Otherwise, you’d like to be, “Why are they feeling so confused about things? They’re good?!? They’re No. 1 somewhere, they have so much stuff, why are they worried?” People always talk about that. But if you are a true fan of BTS and you buy the album and you listen to the hidden track — if you are an Army and we spent time together from 2013, 2014 — they could understand. It’s kind of more special, more closer, to our true hearts"

What about "Letter"?

In conclusion, hidden tracks for BTS, are something between them and their real fans who know about the path they have wended, therefore they can open up to them through lyrics and talk about their fears and struggles and ambitions without being judged or misunderstood. Also, we have to debunk some of the misconceptions going around (especially after the release of FACE) about hidden tracks. For example, some claimed that Letter is made for fans because hidden tracks are always supposed to be “gifts” for fans. This claim obviously can’t be true when you are able to listen to a hidden track legally, only by purchasing the physical album. Gifts are supposed to be free of charge, like Promise, Still with You, Christmas Love, My You, and so on. 

Then what about “Letter”? Why this song is a hidden track in Jimin’s first solo album? Did Jimin want to say something by hiding this track in FACE? To answer this questions, we need to pay attention to the lyrics and how the song was made:

 [Verse 1] What should I say? And how should I convey it? I'm really not getting my words right I know it sounds so clichéd So that it's not taken lightly Let me say it to you properly [Chorus] I say oh-oh, I hope you can be happier You, who stretched your hand out to me whenever I fell I say oh-oh, I'll hold it now (I'll hold it) So when you feel like crying, you won’t fall [Verse 2] After all this time has passed Will we still be the same? Just like we were when we first met, hmm-mmm If we are together, even the desert could turn to a sеa Just like how we were then, oh-hoo-ooh [Chorus] I say oh-oh, I really hope that it’ll last forever You, who felt like a warm spring to me in a cold winter I say oh-oh, I'll always cherish it All those moments between you and I [Refrain] Baby, don't leave Just stay by my side, yeah To you, who see me bigger than what my little self is (to you) So that I can give as much as I’ve received (oh-oh) So that I can keep my word (oh-oh) Don't worry, just stay by my side, yeah (Yeah) We don’t know what the future holds (holds, yeah) And that’s scary and makes us afraid (oh-oh) But don’t forget that we’re always together (don't forget) [Outro] I know it sounds so clichéd So that it's not taken lightly Let me say it to you properly

The Feelings

If you compare these lyrics to "Path" and "Sea" you can clearly see the differences, and except a mention of "sea and desert" there's nothing in common between them. Letter is not a monologue about career issues, it's a romantic song. These lyrics are expressing the feelings and addresses them to an audience and appreciates them. But how was this song made?

According to Jimin, at first, SMF Pt2 was supposed to be the last track of his solo album, but in their YTC promotion and recording era when they announced that they have planned to put their group activities on rest, Jimin decided to express his feelings of the moment through a letter, and turned that letter to song lyrics. Producers liked the song so much and decided to add it in his album and that’s how “Letter” was born. Although Jimin didn’t explain much about those “feelings” and left the conclusion to us like a true artist, we all know that this song is totally different from the other tracks in his album.

All the tracks of FACE are dark and sad. Jimin’s first album is all about himself, and he talks about the painful emotions he had as an artist and a person in the past few year, but with “Letter” there is a different story. Recording Academy admitted this and wrote:

“Though the EP is technically only six songs, the physical version has an additional “hidden” track called “Letter”. The song provides an intimacy that stands out from the other FACE tracks, capturing Jimin in his best form. The lyrics are poignant and vulnerable as Jimin pleads for someone to stay (“Baby, don't leave Just stay by my side, yeah”) The biggest surprise though? Fellow BTS member Jungkook contributes vocals to harmonize with Jimin.”  

A Fan Song?

“Letter” being a “Fan Song” is a stated fact by Park Jimin himself, and there can’t be any arguments about it, but that fact doesn’t mean Jimin made this song with the thought of fans in his head and all about them. In one of my old posts, I said that a faceless crowd can’t be the muse for a romantic song, especially when that song has a "standing-out intimacy".

Another reason for calling "Letter" a fan song, is the fact that it starts at 6:13 of the album, the numbers that remind us of the debut date of BTS. We can't call this a coincidence because we know how thoughtful and punctual Jimin is. But don’t forget that 6.13 is more of BTS time than ARMY time. So, as much as you call this track a song for fans, it can be called a song for his fellow BTS members.

Why JK?

Now, let’s address the elephant in the room. Why JK was a part of this song? Did it mean something for Jimin, or did he have no other options? Jimin said that FACE is an album about himself, and he didn’t feel right about featuring other artists in it, that’s why he decided to record SMF Pt2 all alone and do all the rap parts by himself instead of featuring Yoongi in it. He collaborated with several producers and songwriters (including Namjoon), but there was no featured artist in the whole album.

About the background vocals of the album, he did most parts by himself, and for the other parts, he worked with artists who already had credits in his album, such as BLVSH, Sumin, and James Keys. But JK didn’t have anything to do with Jimin’s album. Jimin was fully capable of doing the background vocals of Letter by himself, as he did for the first parts of the song. Jimin never really explained why he decided to have JK in the song, other than saying their voices match. This known fact doesn’t give us much information, but we can have our speculations. 

Closer Than This?

Another thing that questions the idea of “Letter" being inspired by fans, is the existence of “Closer Than This”. The newest release of Jimin is the exact definition of a fan song, the lyrics are straightforward and directly address the fans and leave no place for speculation. If CTT is the result of Jimin getting inspired by his fans, then “Letter” must be inspired by something different because these two songs are not comparable. 

The difference becomes more obvious when we look at the initial version of the Letter lyrics in Jimin’s drafts. I wonder what the Grammy journalist who called the final lyrics of “Letter” intimate would have said if they read this: 

You hugged me tightly Only you who protected me Hold my hand, hold my hand tightly You who reached out my hand You held out your hand to me

We don’t know what was going on in Jimin’s mind when he wrote these, but we can see that the initial lyrics have been moderated, and the intimate parts, which clearly refer to a person, didn’t end up in the final lyrics. FYI, I’m doing a lyric analysis here, and this is not a complaint or conspiracy theory because Jimin said that he liked the way the final version came out, and it's all that matters.

For Fans, Not About Fans

So far we made it clear that "hidden tracks" are not about fans, they are for fans like any other BTS song, but the hidden tracks are a secret between the artist and the fan, something that only the true and dedicated fan can understand, and this applies to Jimin's "Letter".

Jimin gave up on many records for streaming and buying by releasing this song as a hidden track in his album. So, there must be an important message in this song that he wanted to convey to the true fans. He did his share of being thankful to fans by CTT, and I don't think he needed to do it twice in a year.

Maybe you prefer to think Jimin just made this song for ARMY and hid it in the album as a surprise or because it didn’t match with the whole concept of FACE, and you might not be wrong about any of that. But, don’t forget that he didn’t explain anything about this, and we both are just making assumtions.

Yes, maybe Jimin didn't acknowledge JK being a part of Letter in his promotion era, but JK did everything he could for his share. A few hours before the release of FACE, he started a live and played a part of it with his guitar, and months later, he watched Jimin's live performance for Festa while harmonizing with it and reminding us that he knows the lyrics very well. In Jimin's documentary he was very supportive and even teased for a live performance with him in future.

Why Just Jikook?

Jimin and Jungkook are not the only members of BTS. But I don't know why everytime Jimin or JK do something with romantic undertones, the fans (OT7 ARMYs, to be more specific) immediately try to label it as "About ARMY". I usually don't see this energy with the other five members. I'm perfectly sure they are also very grateful for ARMY, they have released several songs about them, and they would have loved to collaborate in a fan song with Jimin, too.

Then why Jimin only included JK in Letter? Why he wanted to sing for "ARMY" with him? Unless we assume Jimin's gratitude towards ARMY has connections with JK, and I don’t even want to bring up 2019 "I am army" jokes. But "Letter" is the song the most optimistic Jikookers didn't expect to exist. You may try to ignore and normalize it, but you can't deny the fact that Letter proved Jikook's unbreakable connection as two harmonic colleages, long time friends, and inseparable souls.

[woodohwanedandproud]

Mr Plankton

So. As I've mentioned before, the thoughts are thoughting ... a lot ... in a lot of ways, so I need to get them out?

(This turned out even longer than I thought it would - and I tried to limit myself? Also, I don't want to spoil anyone, so it's all under a cut...)

There's so much to unpack but let's start of course by the expected gushing about our man, right :)

First, (not) to be obviously shallow, Mr. Plankton is just a giant Do Hwan praise party and I'm so thankful for it - every shot of him is just so brainstopping breathtaking *beautiful*. You bet he definitely knows what he's doing and he's definitely doing it so very well, duh; but the lightning and filming are REALLY complementing - not even mentioning the unexpected level of fan service everywhere - but he sure works hard for that glorious body of his so the least I can do is take notice in thanks, right? (I had to wonder at some point if they had been yet again 'erasing' some of it like in Joseon Attorney - lol, the trouble of being too much of a hunk - him only, I swear; so I was glad to be told it was just him, he had stopped working out for a while while filming (thanks @pashminabitch). To be honest though, even when he is *like that*, apparently my eyes are still magnetically drawn to HIS FACE - I hadn't even noticed his birthmark until it was pointed out around here (thanks @mrwoodohwan); can you believe how RIDICULOUS I am for this man? Also, i now definitely have A THING for HIS HANDS (massive - how did I not notice before?)

Then, as usual, I will never shut up about HIS ACTING. But LOOK AT HIM ! And LISTEN TO HIM (and yes, his voice, too, grrr) ! The range - THE RANGE - yes yes thank you more more - AND HE'S SO GOOD HERE . He's really put his whole everything into Hae Jo and WOW does it show ! I so hope this opens even more doors for him; he's just so *entirely* talented. Give him all the parts - especially good ones, please pretty please ! HE CAN DELIVER; ANYTHING - HE CAN ! From silly funny to heartbreaking, from introvert to extravert, from raging to loving, from physical to metaphysical, from whatever to whatever ! He's just always SO plainly expressive, even when only through subtle micro expressions. He always acts with EVERYTHING he is and has; and it always hits you downright KO. THE FEELS ! THE FEELS ! (On a side note, I'm starting to think that *his acting signature* as far as I'm concerned might be HIS SMILES - he has such a wide wild array of smiles, from blinding sunshine to obliterating sadness to incendiary promise of doom to... EVERYTHING - he really can express anything and everything just with one smile (because everything hits the nail just right, he doesn't just smile with his mouth but with his whole face and even his whole body; and it always feels entirely natural) - he smiles when he's happy, he smiles when he's sad, he smiles when he's in pain, he smiles when he's angry, he smiles when he's flirty, he smiles when he's threatening, he smiles when - HE SMILES. And as if that wasn't enough: all his characters have like their own brand of special smiles too... How does he even do that? I am IN AWE, I swear ! Also: I have to mention HIS EYEBROWS work is insane too in general... And well... just EVERYTHING - everything he does is just insane good level anyway...) To come back strictly to Hae Jo: he is a hell of a character; and Do Hwan truly succeeded in impersonating him. It's even one of my favourites of his roles now.

On to the show?

First, I'm so thankful it delivered what the first scene promised. I was ready to hurt from the premise, and so I wanted to hurt; and hurt badly. But I was still half expecting the show to pull some unrealistic magical recovery - even at the end of the last ep. I was so relieved and satisfied when the end credits started to roll and it hadn't - a total wreck of course, but a good wreck. I can't believe it's labelled a rom-com (and again i'm SO happy it ISN'T). Not only because of THE MASSIVE HURT, but also because even though the romance aspect is definitely present, to me it's not really what the show is about - it's SO MUCH MORE, and again, I'm glad Do Hwan got the opportunity to be this kind of not exactly (but in some ways yes) antimodel but always so much more LAYERED character than the 'standard' romcom part. I wish he could have gotten his teeth even more into the horrendous sadness and wrench our hearts even more (I don't even mean by crying - no matter how gutwrenching WELL he always does that too - but he's actually SO good he can be gutwrenching even just simply staring into nothing or whatever, right); but the show kept too upbeat in general for it and I understand why - and it really works (also, in a way, it makes it HIT even more when the show DOES get in this direction, so it's not really a complaint, just knowing that we could have had even MORE...)

Then, I LOVED the traumas, the issues, the unreliable self narrator thing, the lack of communication / miscommunication thing(s), the lack of understanding from lack of information not only between characters but also for us, because we don't have yet the whole perspective, the hurt, the lost families and the found families and the self-chosen families and so many LAYERS relationwise between the characters. Love works downwards - and that can be true (it is for me, because I had/have wonderful parents/grandparents and they are the ones who taught me love, from day one). But love also works upwards and sideways, of course, and even if Hae Jo doesn't (want to) see it for a long time, we as viewers get to see it and so plainly :) It is in the end a truly HUMAN show, about real people, with their qualities AND THEIR FLAWS, with their best and their worst. We're made of greys. It feels REAL. I watch shows to FEEL - and Mr. Plankton definitely served.

The first part of the show balances between fun and serious, and yes i did laugh here and there of course, but to me the show truly wins when the seriousness takes the upper hand. The show imo was at its best when it toed the line between silly and heartbreaking. The potato girl and the mushroom guy. We come out of the same freezer. John Na's hand blocking Eo Heung's view while he cries. The escape from the hospital because Hae Jo doesn't want to die under a *$!%&!$ ceiling. That damn four leaves clover.

What I just didn't adhere to though was the 'gang chase/comedy' parts. It adds imo nothing to the plot - they could (and should?) have gone chasing after the woman and the money, instead of behind Hae Jo's sorry ass... Jae Mi could have fallen or whatever and hurt herself just as badly whild being saved by the shoe without a mess wound... and it could have still be 'on Hae Jo's conscience' by accident (falling bad and impaling herself on something or whatever?) I can't help but wish they would have done something else with all that screen time. *SIGH* (On the other hand, if you cast Do Hwan why not use his amazing sportive skills, I guess, of course (he CAN do anything, truly), but weave it better into the story then?)

About Hae Jo's quest, I was expecting for him to find his sperm donor had died long ago. I love what the show came up with even more. Especially as you can see it two ways - and both are awesome. If number 2 is it it's maddening and painful because let's be honest he's not a very loving nor lovable character, yet he lives while... yep; if number 2 isn't and Hae Jo abandons the quest because he's realized there is no quest necessary to start with because the father he needs closure with is, well, his father, i just really love that take - growing AND heartbreak, right, AAAHHHHHHH ! (And when Hae Jo finally gets back 'home' and tries to tell himself it's now allright even as he realizes that this isn't home anymore because it's over a decade too late? as his bed doesn't feel comfortable anymore no matter how much he tries to shift? You can reconcile with the child you were but you can't go back home ? AAAHHHHHH ! And then Jae Mi comes to kidnap him back AAAHHHH again, gold reversal)

I have mixed feelings over Jae Mi, because on the one hand she has a lot of luggage, and I respect that. But I still think she is on the whole quite selfish generally - and I get where it comes from and I don't really blame her, but looking forward and looking TO OTHERS instead of always backwards might help, you know? I also don't think she was actually in love with Eo Heung - more like she was searching for warmth and security (and does he provide indeed !, so totally understandable; but I can't help but feel their relation would have been unbalanced) so I can't judge Hae Jo too hard for coming in between. She definitely has her moments though indeed - my favourite being her confessing that she walked away at that time because she wanted him to stop her - there's guts in that admission, chapeau (their break-up was so miscommunication/not interpreting the signals right on both sides I'm like why did you two idiots did this to yourselves, you were so cute and so obviously head over heels (and still are) - but that's real, actually, and that's why it hits, every time, no matter how many times we get back to that moment- AAAHHHH) And the noise bite - go girl, i agree ! Because I BELIEVED in their love. I really did. They sold it 1000%. All the time. In the flashbacks. In the present. I BELIEVED. and I FELT. Do I feel that Hae Jo loves her more than she loves him, yes - because she is imo more self-centered and less giving than he is (explainable from her past; and it's good to see her at least START to grow). But she loves him, truly and obviously. And she makes him happy - she does. Not all relation are 50/50 on the lifting, but as long as both are actually willing to lift at least some, right... They still feel like *partners*, both doing things FOR each other, and proactively; both to each other a wall they can lean on, a hug they find comfort in, and a hand pulling them forward.

I love Eo Heung (honestly, he is the kindest sweetest ever), but his love for Jae Mi to me feels more selfless and caring, father like, than partner like, though; so I wasn't rooting for him in his Jae Mi debacle. Also there were moments I couldn't help but feel he was a bit over stereotyped - especially in a show where all other characters are imo really fleshed out (not including the mob gang only there imo for (unnecessary) comic relief indeed). I'm really glad he seems to be at a good place by the end, I wish him the best :) And his growing caring/understanding of Hae Jo :)

John Na is a gem (and could have been used more as (necessary) comic relief than the gang imo). So very few lines yet so ever present - and always so ON POINT. Also, I have his whole background headcanonned :)

And Kkari is such a cutie :)

The music is good overall. But California Dreaming? It just fits. My jaw dropped and my chest tightened at the first note the first time it came up at the end of ep1. JUST SO PERFECT. The catchy yet melancholic tune. The longing sadness and the hope. The need/missing to belong. The oldie so 'memories calling' vibe. Thanks to the one who made that choice because WOW DOES IT WORK !!!

Lastly, I hesitated before mentioning those last bits because I can't even believe this is what I come up with at the end of the day, and I don't want to upset anyone or whatever - but it IS what I feel?

It's like they took all the cringe tropes and turn them into something real and true and beautiful anyway? I was surprised by the way my thoughts and feelings over the characters evolved ep by ep - it was like being repeatedly slapped in the face and forced to reconsider carved into marble stuff even if I didn't even want to?

Imo, Hae Jo isn't the typical 'thinking he is entitled' asshole who can't take no for an answer he seems to be at the beginning. He came to the kidnapping plot because he has just come to play the part for that woman in the beginning, and he is doing it in fact because he believes it's what Jae Mi needs after having witnessed her emotional display at the hospital. I do believe he would never have even thought about it if he had stumbled upon Jae Mi and Eo Heung walking down the streets happy together. And if she had gone back to Eo Heung he would have let her be. Also, by taking the blame on him that way, he ensures that she stays in fact spotless - and so if she truly wants to leave and go back, no one will be able to blame her for anything. It is, in that very specific case, a caring gesture, in fact. And even as he chases her; he never pushes. And no matter what she says (and does she say hurtful things - telling someone you wish for him to die is like the rudest of rudest thing to say no matter what - I get that it's intended because we know he is actually dying so we're slapped in the face anytime she shouts something like this out, but still, girl, that's just not how anyone is supposed to talk to anyone no matter what, no matter where you have been raised - also: when someone is fainting around it is generally NOT a good sign, i understand she wanted to be in denial (i guess), but still, it took her so long to actually *worry*?) she clings to him, and right from the beginning; and she stays, time and time again. And when he realizes he actually has her and kind of realizes then what he will pput her through and tries to push her away again and that she says that this time she'll stay ? AAAHH !! Anyway, even when he does the most seemingly awful hurtful things - like dumping her at her mother's house - he's in fact not being awful (it was a gift to start with because she has always wanted to know; and he had thought Eo Heung would get to her (because he knows he cannot take care of her for long himself anyway) - and then Eo Heung comes to him; bless!) I'm not saying he's always right. And even less a model of perfection we should aspire to or long to (neither be nor meet). He's a MESS. But in the end, aren't we all? At least, in his sometimes tangled seemingly wrong ways, he tries to do right?

And Bong Suk? I'm a mom, okay - A MOM. Who needs perfume? I was like huh? He's going to be my son or my lover? - those two words just shouldn't ever EVER be in the same sentence, I'm sure they heard me shout at my TV at the other side of town. Cringest of the cringest to me - so much more than the kidnapping bit which I could contextualize in that precise context. And guess what. I firmly believe now that she truly WAS Hae Jo's jackpot - and the one who loved him THE BEST out of everyone. And I'm like: how did THAT happen? But she was truly here, always, FOR him, no matter what. She took him in when necessary, she pushed him when she had to in his best interest, she let him go when he needed to go, all the while never demanding anything. she is THE ONE he knows he can come to - always and for anything. she is the one he opens to, and the one he *breaks* to (and *choose* to break too - when Jae Mi holds him he has already fallen apart / when Bong Suk confronts him he could have still escaped the room). AND I LOVE HER FOR IT. (Do I even believe she might be the one he gave his virginity to; because she was safe and he wanted to build confidence or whatever - not because there ever was anything romantic between the two of them - and she went along FOR HIM even knowing it would probably end up hurting her more than she would want - and I'm not only okay with it but even grateful? Coming from where I started? Again: how did that happen?) Just to be clear in case it isn't, I do not ship them - at all. They are NOT partners, at all. There is definitely a caretaker and a caretakee, no partner balance. And it's not either like she's his Mom or whatever - he had a Mom and she's dead. It's just, they have their own thing, and it works - it really works; only because it is them - and only them.

(And don't hit me; I hit myself hard enough already)

Finally, I get it's a show so I shouldn't take it that seriously, but I can't help but feel that 1) they shouldn't have had Hae Jo drive so much, knowing he had a ticking bomb in his head - it is not safe, not for him and even more not safe for others - that feels way more cringe to me than the kidnapping that sort of isn't. 2) please, do not make Do Hwan smoke. Not only because I care about his lungs, but because I care about everyone's lungs and him smoking is like an advert for it because, yes, he makes it look sexy (but then, he makes everything look sexy, right, so it's not his fault, lol) - and smoking isn't sexy (and it stinks!). 3) use salads intead of fish for silly fights. don't waste any food, generally; but if you have to then at least use not living food for it? (Am I petty? I am. Still... A minimum of respect for what dies so you can eat?)

So.

Do I believe story-wise Mr. Plankton could have been even *better*. Yes. Am I forever carrying all of them and especially Hae Jo in my heart anyway. Yes.

FAIR WARNING: I will reblog Mr. Plankton EVERYTHING !!!

(And now, on to a rewatch? (skipping the gang bits))

@mctna2019 : thank you so much for pointing out the reason Jae-mi was kidnapped by him. this is what I thought from the beginning. in his own way, he wanted to make her happy before his death. not to take Jae-mi for himself, but to show her a more correct way, and this led to both Eo-houng and Jae-mi finding their way. it was so beautiful.

=> YOU ARE SO RIGHT AND I LOVE HOW YOU PUT HIS !!! HUGS:)

[etaleah]

Absolutely sucks that your blog is ravaged with proshipping apologia. Like yeah enjoying dark subject matter in fiction doesn't mean you condone it IRL (I myself am an avid gore and kink fan and use that to express my feelings in art) but uhhh there's a difference between depicting pedophilia in a story and actively jacking it to child porn which is what most if not all proshippers are trying to justify.

The Venn diagram between proshippers and anime lolicons is a circle. "Ohhh it's not real" yeah sure technically but that's still very much a child being raped on screen you're getting your rocks off to. Being in the second dimension doesn't negate that.

Most proshippers don't actually care about properly depicting complex subject matter in art. They just wanna write their incest rape South Park fics and call anyone who calls them out on it "puritans." (I doubt any of you really understand what that word means. If not liking child porn makes me a puritan then call me the Virgin fucking Mary.) It's all excuses, excuses.

Fiction affects reality more than you think. It's why propaganda is so effective. It's why Jim Crow and minstrelsy was (and still is tbh) so harmful to African Americans. Why do you think POC care about how they're depicted in media so much? It very much influences thinking, how people see the world.

(There is an argument to be made about the rampant racism in fandom, but that's a whole other conversation.)

Don't dismiss this ask. I want you to read it very carefully and get yourself out of the echo chamber you've put yourself in. Consider the points made at the very least. Use the "critical thinking" you claim to love so much.

I have considered the points you made and read them very carefully, and I have found them incorrect, relying on faulty logic, and full of unverified assumptions and false equivalences. I now bring you a full breakdown of exactly why, though I’m putting it under a cut in case anyone wants to avoid the Discourse™ because this breakdown is a long one.

*cracks knuckles* Here we go!

You clearly have a different definition of “proship” than I do. I and those that I have reblogged or liked (as far as I can tell) are “proship” in the sense that we’re arguing for the freedom to read what you want and write what you want because thoughtcrime isn’t real, no one gets hurt inside your head, and the ability to read and write what we wish is vital to a free society. That’s my definition of “proship,” and if you have a different definition and are determined to stick to it, there’s not much I can do about that. I can only tell you what my definition is so that you know what I’m referring to when I talk about it in this post or reblog posts mentioning it.

If you’re referring to what’s on AO3 (which is what I am mainly concerned with, as I don’t talk about other fanfic sites on my blog), that is not child porn. It’s not. The term child porn refers to sexual photos and videos of real children, not text-only stories about fictional ones. AO3 does not allow users to upload videos nor does it allow users to upload photos except for their profile pictures, and it is literally written into their Terms of Service that they do not allow child pornography on their site. You couldn’t put child porn on AO3 if you tried. Text by itself with no photos or videos accompanying it is not child porn, and that’s true no matter how disgusting and immoral you find it. I don’t support or justify child porn because I don’t support or justify real children being hurt, which is what actual child porn involves and requires.

What I do support is the freedom for everyone to read and write what they want, and I am not going to stop supporting that.

How do you know that the people reading or writing a fic are “getting their rocks off to” or “actively jacking it” to what's in it? Did they tell you? Have you developed telepathic powers and read their minds? How do you know that people “don’t actually care about properly depicting complex subject matter in art?” Don’t dismiss those questions, answer them. You don’t know why someone is reading something and you don’t know why someone is writing something. I have no idea whether the person checking Mein Kampf or Birth of a Nation out of a library is a racist who agrees with everything in both works or a scholar doing research for a paper on racism or just an average joe who wants to see what’s in there for themselves and form their own conclusions, which is a perfectly fine and intellectually healthy thing to want. I don’t know which of these is the case and I’m not going to automatically assume the worst-case scenario, nor am I going to demand that the person checking out those works provide me with an explanation because they don’t owe me one. You don’t know why someone is reading or writing a rape or incest story. Maybe they find it sexy or maybe they’re a victim themselves, working through their trauma by expressing it via the written word. You don’t know which one it is, and they don’t owe you an explanation. I’d advise you not to automatically assume the worst-case scenario either.

Because you know what happens when people assume the worst of an author’s intentions and assume they know what a work is doing? You get situations like Isabel Fall’s and Lindsay Ellis’ where people were sure they knew that the former was being transphobic with her short story and that the latter was trivializing rape with her “rape rap.” They were so sure, as sure as you are in your ask, not a doubt in their minds, didn’t think it was possible for there to be any other reason or interpretation, and so they felt totally justified in harassing those women. I’m sure each of them convinced themselves they were doing this because they were an ally who just cared so much and that those authors deserved the hate they were getting because (gasp!) they wrote something bad and if you write something bad, you should expect to be called out. And then they found out—oops! Turns out Isabel Fall was a trans person and not a cis person being transphobic after all, and was actually writing a story about a subject she had plenty of experience with, and—oops! Turns out Lindsay Ellis was an assault victim herself and she was coping with her trauma in the best way she could because making a lighthearted rap about the subject made it more accessible, easier to deal with, and not as scary and she wasn’t making fun of victims after all. Whoops!

How do you know the people writing these fics you find so horrible aren’t doing something similar to Ellis and Fall? How do you know they aren’t victims working through their grief and trauma in a way that helps them? How do you know you’re not misjudging and assuming the worst of them just like Fall’s and Ellis’ haters misjudged and assumed the worst of them? Don’t dismiss those questions, answer them. How do you know?

Why do you get to be the authority who decides what “properly depicting complex subject matter in art” even looks like? Maybe someone else read it and decided it was properly depicted; why does your opinion and interpretation matter more than theirs? Why is yours the correct one? Don’t dismiss those questions, answer them.

I don’t know what anime lolicon is, so I’m not gonna comment on that, though I will say it disproves your point about the Venn diagram being a circle since I am technically a proshipper and yet I don’t even know what that is. I’m sure if you look hard enough, you can probably find someone using the proship label who has done something bad or supports something bad, but the same can be said about antis. You get assholes in every group. Doesn’t mean everyone in the group is a bad person.

(Also I know this isn’t the most important point here but the fact that you’re more worried about the content of South Park fanfics rather than the South Park show itself says to me that you care more about finding an easy target than about minimizing harm because that show has plenty of racist and anti-Semitic “jokes” in it that are being fed to a much larger audience than any fanfic of it could ever have, yet I don’t see you being worried at all about that. Wonder why.)

(Another less important point but one I’m still going to indulge in: I find your line about “if that makes me a puritan then call me the Virgin Mary” funny in an ironic way because in trying to claim that people don’t know what the word puritan means, you proved that you yourself don’t know what it means by implying that puritan = virgin. Puritan and virgin are not the same thing. Virgin is a state of being that could be voluntary or, if you want sex but can’t find anyone to give it to you, it could be involuntary. One could be a virgin and still be sex-positive just like one could be a religious fundamentalist with ten kids who’s had all the sex required to make those ten kids but still be sex-negative and think that only the straight married baby-making kind is okay and all other kinds are impure and gross. Unlike virginity, puritanism is a mindset, not a state of being, and therefore it is always voluntary. You can be one without being the other. Again, not a super important point, but I thought the irony of that line was funny.)

You do know that Jim Crow was a set of laws and policies set down by the government and enforced by police and courts and not, like…a dirty fanfic or book, right? You do know that? It was and still is a legal framework that’s baked into the justice system and has been the driving force behind everything from mass incarceration to drug policy to redlining and housing to voter disenfranchisement. Bitch, I fucking wish that Jim Crow was nothing more than a bad fanfic or a bad story; that would make it a hell of a lot easier to fight! Acting like any one (fan)fiction writer or any one piece of (fan)fiction has the same amount of power as the fucking US government is some insane false equivalence.

As for the representation argument, you’re misunderstanding what that movement is about and why the founders of it cared about the state of media. We Need Diverse Books and organizations like it did not start their campaigns because they were disgusted by what White writers were doing and wanted to stop them and make sure they could never do it again. They started their campaigns to empower and encourage authors of color. It began when a few Black mothers were looking for books for their kids and realized they couldn’t find any with a Black child on the cover, not because they read something a White person wrote and were so horrified by it that they had to put a stop to it. Being so horrified by something in a story that you have to put a stop to it is what Moms for Liberty does. The goal of the representation matters movement is to diversify the publishing industry since it’s still majority White, to publish more authors of color because most of the authors being published are still White, and to update school curriculums so that students of color can read about and study characters like themselves. All of which are good and reasonable goals. It is not and never was about telling people what they were and were not allowed to write or read, or saying that they’re bad people because of what they write or read.

“Influences thinking” and “affecting reality” are not the same as controlling or determining thinking and reality. If fiction really does affect how people see the real world, then why, in a time when we have more positive books/movies/TV shows/plays of and by POC and positive queer books/movies/TV shows/plays than ever before, are we still dealing with vicious racism and homophobia? If fiction influences thinking and affects reality and how people see the world so much, then why, in a time when we have Drag Queen Story Hour and trans characters are being featured positively in popular TV shows and trans actors are winning awards, are we still dealing with some of the worst transphobia we’ve ever seen? Don’t dismiss those questions, answer them.

Fiction doesn’t make things happen. Playing violent video games doesn’t make a person violent. Reading or writing about an immoral act does not mean you agree with, get off to, or are going to do the immoral act. And that’s true regardless of what the immoral act in question is, whether it's gore or kink or rape or incest.

The problem with “you can read/write what you want except for X because X is gross/morally wrong” is that the bigots and mean-spirited folks of the world will find a way to make anything they don’t like into X. That’s the part antis don’t think about. But we’re already seeing it play out in school board meetings.

“We don’t want to ban Maus because it talks about the Holocaust, we want to ban it because uhhh it has pictures of naked prisoners in the camps and therefore it’s pornography.”

“We don’t want to ban Beloved because it talks about slavery, we want to ban it because uhhh it has a slave getting raped in it and therefore it’s pornography and sexually explicit and won’t someone think of the children!”

“We don’t want to ban all of these books because they have Black kids on the covers, we want to ban them because uhhh they’re critical race theory and indoctrination that teaches White kids to hate themselves!”

“We don’t want to keep drag queens out of libraries because we hate them and are transphobic, we want to keep them out of libraries because uhhh they’re sexualizing minors and teaching them to mutilate their genitals!”

Those are real examples. And they will happen to fanfiction too if we’re not careful. Someone doesn’t like Sonadow? Well they’re not against it because they’re homophobic or just don’t like the ship, they’re against it because uhhh it’s pedophilia since Shadow is 50-65 depending on how you count it and Sonic is 15. If it can happen with books, it can happen with fanfiction.

We’ve already seen cases of people running for board positions on AO3 who talked about “cleaning up the site,” and each time it turned out they were homophobic and were very much including queerness in what they considered “dirty.” That’s going to keep happening because antis keep falling for it and getting swept up in a manufactured moral panic without thinking through what the enforcement would be like. The whole reason AO3 has the policies that it does is because these kinds of purges happened regularly on other sites. Every time, people insisted it was “just the bad ones,” “just the immoral ones,” “just the underage ones,” etc. And it never was. And after every purge, there’d be a lot fewer queer love stories in the world.

How are you going to make sure that doesn’t happen again? How will you decide whose definitions of terms like “pedophilia,” “grooming,” “underage,” “sexualizing,” “fetishizing” get used? That’s the part antis never think about, is what enforcement of what they want would actually involve. Some people think “underage” is anyone under 25 or under 20 and some think it’s anyone under 18. Which one is right? Who gets to decide? Which country’s age of consent is the correct one that fanfic writers around the world all have to abide by regardless of where they’re from, and why is that country’s age of consent the correct one? Whose interpretation of a work is the correct one? And whoever ends up making these decisions, how will you stop this decision maker who gets to say what counts as “properly and improperly depicting complex subject matter” and what doesn’t from shifting the goalposts and abusing their power? How will you stop them from applying those negative labels to just any work they don’t like? What checks and balances will be put in place to keep whoever does the fanfiction gatekeeping from abusing that position? Don’t dismiss those questions, answer them. I’ve yet to see an anti have an answer to these questions.

I know propaganda is effective because you’ve fallen for it. The idea that peoples’ ability to read and write what they want must be restricted because Think of the Children™ and because “only bad people would ever want to read/write something bad” is the same talking points used by Moms for Liberty, Ron DeSantis, the people protesting Drag Queen Story Hour, and so many others. Every single time an attempt is made to restrict the freedom to read and write, it is always couched in the paternalistic language of protection, safety, just looking out for kids, and the fearmongering language of “that stuff is freaky, dirty, and gross and only a pervert would ever have a problem with it being banned.” Every time, it is discussed with the language of protection and safety, and every time, it is a lie.

I support the right of everyone to read and write what they want because I don’t know their situation, don’t have the right to demand an explanation of their situation or a detailed account of their very private and personal traumas, and have seen what happens when people try to excuse banning and censorship of written text or harassing authors with the excuses of “it’s just the bad ones,” “we’re just protecting kids,” “we just have a few concerns,” “we’re just being good allies,” and “if I wrote something gross I’d expect to get called out!”

So. Now that I have responded to your points, I hope that you will very carefully read and consider my points at the very least and get out of your echo chamber and use some critical thinking too. The fact that you put the phrase critical thinking in quotes like it’s a fake thing that doesn’t exist instead of a real and very important skill reveals a lot more than I think you meant it to, but still I hope you try.

I’ve disabled anonymous asks because I want to see if you’re brave enough to respond without hiding behind anonymity. I’ll be interested to see if you or anyone who agrees with you actually provides thoughtful, well-reasoned, and well-articulated answers to the questions I’ve asked instead of replying with a thought-terminating ad hominem like “That was a lot of words to say that you’re a [insert bad thing here]!” or “Just say you [insert bad thing here] and go!” And if you can actually provide evidence for your claims, if you can provide non-anecdotal, verifiable studies and data that are not from a religious or rightwing think tank that prove your points about proshipping and proshippers, then I’ll really be impressed.

I’m not holding my breath though.

[razorblade180]

Weiss:Excuse you!? Do you have any idea who I am!? Will not just let you stand here and talk to my friends or myself like that!

Meanwhile Weiss’s kids

Nick:Friendly reminder, I can buy and sell your future back to you for a profit. Watch your tone.

Summer:Now, now, let’s not make this a big thing.

Girl:I don’t need the lip service from a pop star hack whose talent is having mommy’s money or attitude from her high and mighty pathetic brother.

Summer:If that’s what my only talent is then you must have nothing going for you at all. Is that why your *tilts head* boyfriend is my biggest fan?

Girl:You-

Summer:He’s been to a lot shows y’know. I wonder…just whose name he screams more often? I mean you see him more but definitely have to put in more effort into earning that. Meanwhile all I have to do is look at the third row on the right and smile.

Girl:….

Nick:……

Summer:*smile* Never call my brother pathetic ever again.

xxxxxx

Peach:They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but considering who you are, I’m confident your parents failed the first step by never holding you to begin with. Truly an amazing feat that doctor pulled off that stormy you were born.

Boy:You little-

Peach:Careful! He’s gonna have to hold you again soon if you finish that thought.

[clearheartsgreyflowerss]

(I’m wondering if you do poly relationships. If you don’t, then feel free to decline this request)

How about some Robin x F!reader x Sparkle hcs. This includes the characters relationship with the reader and the poly in general. Some fluffy and chaotic shenanigans

/)/)

( . .)

( づ♡

I absolutely do! I myself am polyamorous, so i loved writing this. Ty for the request 🩷

(Everything is a little random, honestly this post may or may not have convinced me that Robin x Sparkle is an adorable ship)

To say you three had a chaotic relationship would be an understatement, almost everything was a surprise when you all were around.

Oftentimes you're with Robin, helping her along with anything she wants or needs. It's hard for her to do things when she is the robin, so she'll ask you for favors, which you get many kisses in return for.

Whenever sparkle shows up is when it gets interesting. She very much likes to show off around you two, so she'll show up in the most random ways possible. One of Robin's bodyguards? Surprise! Sparkle has been pretending to be him all day. Even Sunday isn't safe, she's pretended to be him on multiple occasions, and neither one of you figure out till she finally drops a hint.

Despite her tricks, she really enjoys being "sparkle" around you two. Even if she is just playing a character, you two make her feel like that is who she should be, trickster and all.

Robin also feels like her truest self around you two. She never has to put up an act, she can laugh genuinely at both sparkle's antics and your jokes, it never feels forced.

If either you or sparkle stay the night, she will absolutely sing you to sleep. Sparkle always needs to be listening to something to fall asleep, so it helps her immensely. You've developed the same habit ever since you started living with Robin. She sings around the house and at night, so you always want to hear her singing!

Robin is also very lovey dovey, she would always hold your hand if she could. Whenever sparkle graces you two with her presence, Robin is most definitely playing with her hair (would also do the same with yours if it is long).

Here's some more silly little head cannons (but in bullet point form :D)

. Sparkle is a big fan of PDA with you, anything that will surprise other people is what she's going for. She'll wear lipstick just to leave kiss marks all over your face, and you won't figure it out until you finally get home that day.

. You probably do most of the cooking in the relationship. Of course Robin helps whenever she gets the time, but she tends to have lots of duties to attend to. (And I'm pretty sure sparkle would burn the food or make something that she finds to be good, and it's actually like almost inedible.)

. Dates in public rarely happen between the 3 of you, even if you (hypothetically) found a time when none of you were busy, Robin can't exactly go out as herself, nor is it really a good idea to take sparkle anywhere. Most dates consist of either a spa night, watching terrible movies, or cuddling.

. I mentioned this earlier, but Robin's love language is a mix of physical touch and words of encouragement. If she's in public with you and sparkle, she'll rain down compliments on both of you. She never fails to notice little things in your outfit, or how sparkle is luckily holding herself back from bothering the shit out of other people. When you all are in private, her hands are definitely busy with one of you.

. Sparkle is a mix of acts of service and giving gifts. She'll never say it out loud, but it's always her doing when suddenly your schedule will miraculously work itself out whenever you want to spend time with her or Robin. She'll do just about anything to see you two smiling and laughing, so she'll use her connections quite often for you two. As for gifts, she always makes sure you know those are from her. Even if it's just a silly little bracelet, Sparkle will write a long theatrical note to go with it, usually making up some crazy plot about how she found the item.

Anyway, even if all 3 of you walked down very different paths, each person brings their own love and happiness to the relationship <3

How to write an ending no glue no borax (literally kill me I hate writing the end of anything T-T)

Once again, ty for the request! It was lots of fun to write, and honestly challenged me a little. I have lots of my own little head cannons for Robin, but I never really was a big sparkle fan, so I didn't know too much about her. I tried not to write her ooc, so sorry if it came off that way :(

I do know more about her now though and I am happy to say I do like her! I was honestly considering pulling for her bc she's coming up in the next banner, but I'm not trying to pull another Jade and Argenti rn.

Thank you for reading!! If you like my work please consider liking and rebloging it 🩷

Daily click to help those in Palestine

[play-rough]

Re: pet regressors, what is comforting to you when you are in petspace? What activities do you do to play? What would you like your caretaker (owner? what’s the preferred terminology?) to do with you?

Ehehehehe, as someone who goes into little space and pet space at times, you have no idea how happy this question makes me ^-^ This post will bounce all over the place. Apologies in advance.

First topic, verbal communication ✨ sometimes I am capable of speaking, but the words are usually improper/grammatically incorrect due to the headspace. I prefer noises like whining/barking/mewling/squeaking (depending on what pet headspace I'm in).

Second topic, nonverbal communication 🤐 body language does play a good part of how you communicate with your owner or other pets in pet space. It lets another see your emotions or thoughts. Nuzzling, biting, head butting, pushing, leaning on, eye contact/motioning, licking, nibbling, rubbing against, pawing at, wriggles (picture excited dog that starts a full body shake when they hear the word "walk")—these are all different things I use to motion what I need or want. Because you write so much hurt/comfort, I also noted down a list of common behaviors I have when feeling certain emotions, but I have no idea if that's a tmi. (Side note, I can use ASL properly when in pet space, but it's a bit awkward.)

Third topic, lingo 💃 I usually see other people call it petspace, and for the most part I do as well. Animal headspace is a slightly different thing for me because it's not so,,, codependent? Usually I call my partner "master," and I refer to them as that or "owner" when talking to their people about my dynamic. I prefer the first in direct address, but certain nicknames work too when in headspace. I don't use either if I'm between little and pet space. I have a specific way of talking then.

Fourth topic, objects of interaction 🧸 toys and comfort objects are definitely important. I was a semi-destructive mess before I finally bought some to keep me from chewing on stuff I would have to repair later. Because I'm not always near my partner when I'm in pet space, I usually keep myself occupied. Hm, collars help ground me, and leashes are occasionally to my benefit. The collar's weight and significance of showing I have a master helps my head to not be so foggy/have me not spiral into on emotion, and the leash has two purposes depending. If I'm in petspace alone, it's something nice to play with with my hands. If my owner is holding it, it's a way I can immediately know where I'm looking for guidance/instruction.

Fifth topic, master-to-pet interaction 🤝 because my main pet space is dog/puppy, I'm a big fan of commands and training. When I talk to people about the dog in me I mean the acts of service girlypop who's very eager to please lol. Exercise/going on walks is also tons of fun. Romping in the grass is peak. But also toys >>> Toys are the best.

Sixth topic, little shittery 🤭 people in pet space are not exempt from a love of mischief or habits of getting into things. I'm more obedient when leaning towards dog, but when I'm in a feline headspace, I have no qualms about doing stuff I shouldn't. Knocking stuff off the table for fun, moving stuff around to frustrate someone, hiding a belonging that I should not have, stealing food—all this done while acting completely innocent. I will pull out big doe eyes and a curious purr while knowing I will be darting to go hide in a closet or under a bed the moment they figure out it's me who did it. Playing chase is fun; what can I say...

Seventh topic, miscellaneous notes 📝 • I don't like using eating utensils in petspace. It's just kinda weird for me to actively pay attention to. But if it's a command, I can momentarily get over it. • When punished by or frustrated at my owner, I'm more prone to being sulky in a cat petspace and being dejected in a dog headspace. Being snippy versus curling up and crying type thing. • I'm definitely possessive of my master in an odd way that makes me like to wear something to show I'm theirs. It's like a symbol that not only do I have an owner but they're also the love of my life, hehe. • Reading and writing are do-able in headspace, but I don't exactly like to. When I'm little, I just focus on the task and tell myself once I'm finished I can go get my blanket and hug it (if I'm big enough), but my attention span and energy levels in pet space usually have me falling asleep on any paperwork I'm supposed to be doing or be unable to do anything in a timely/constructive manner. Do-able but not very useful. • I'm neurodivergent, and that also affects my time in petspace. Auditory sensory issues become stronger, and I sometimes have to walk myself through some things I could normally do without thinking. • Crawling on all fours just feels more natural.

P.S. I was grinning like mad fool the entire time I was writing this.

P.P.S. because I had to go off to class before I could answer, I spent most of my day drafting up a reply and making notes.

-💜🐕‍🦺 (I might also use 💜🐕 depending on the mood sksksk I'll get into that explanation later if situations permit)

Thank you! This is all very very helpful!! I really enjoyed how detailed all your examples were and they will be very helpful for the petre fic 🥺🩷 thank you for taking the time to type all this up i really appreciate it!

[lumiambrose]

Blue lock option matchup for @tigreblvnc

Suo x Rin Itoshi

warning: this matchup contains nsfw, minors dni

well damn, this is a matchup i didn’t see coming.

this matchup definitely has is pros and cons but ultimately, i totally see it working out.

focusing on the pros (cause fuck the cons)

also i love matching up rin <3

you two share each other's rationality and decisiveness. from my experiences, rational people thrive best around those alike. they don’t need someone thinking with their gut but rather someone who will dissect a process and plan the best outcome. rin likes that you're direct, he doesn’t like people that sugar-coat their shit and in general you two complement each other nicely with how you’re able to keep up with another thought process.

rin has never been a big fan of romance imo. his family dynamic is very struggled and complicated to say the least, so i can imagine he never really understood the concept of love. so at the beginning of your relationship, there’s a lot of distance and the talking stage took years.

rin aint gonna open up to anyone quickly, nah uh. but that didn’t stop you.

you definitely had to be the person to make most of the moves at the beginning (or at least make the first move). i mentioned this in another matchup but this guy has trust issues, i mean, look at what his brother did to him. that being said though, once he can trust you… oh my god he’s the sweetest, but we’ll get to that later.

i don’t think you would mind rin being so reserved and closed off at the beginning. you mentioned that you enjoy dissecting people's psychology so i can definitely see you having fun. figuring out this man is gonna be your toughest challenge yet but the rewards are endless.

he’s very mean at the start. it’s a mix between him not wanting someone weak and his own fears that produce this behaviour though. once he realises you’re different from everyone else, it’s very small gestures but there’ll be signs.

it would start with something so simple as watching you more intensely, seeing the way your body executes tiny movements, subconsciously taking note of your habits. then stuff that’s a bit more seeable. he’ll leave a book that he thinks you’ll like coincidentally out in the open so you can find it and enjoy it, or if there’s a snack he knows you like, he’ll make sure there’s enough leftover or even another pack for you.

just little things like that y’know.

once he realises he loves you and you two start dating, he’s all for the acts of service. there’s just so much joy he gets from being able to do stuff for you.

you mentioned you like massages? well rin is a top tier masseuse. he learnt how to massage himself for his career (and he doesn’t like other people touching him, except you of course) so you bet he’ll massage you 24/7.

rin doesn’t really know how to show his love all that well so once he sees the way you smile or light up when he cooks for you or comes home with your favourite snacks… it has him in a chokehold.

once he gets more confident around you, he’s very clingy. he’ll try his best to hide it but once it’s just the two of you he’s all over you.

imagine this man and his cold stare as he just clings onto you like a koala as you two watch a movie together.

very clingy. need i say more?

i actually think you and rin share a lot of traits. “Analytical and in my own world. I am sometimes told I’m too direct, lacking in tact and empathy.” and “I have a strong need for solitude. I dream big. I am hard on myself.” really speak out to me here.

it’s no surprise that rin has spent the most of his life fighting on his own and in my eyes, seems to prefer it that way after his brother left. considering you yourself need solitude, i can see you two using each other for closure, but also giving each other plenty of space to survive on your own.

of course, he’ll help you if you ask or vice versa. but he trusts you to be able to handle yourself.

rin isn’t the most goofy person so don’t expect that much from him. you guys are the trademark grumpy x sunshine trope (im not jealous im not jealous im not jealous).

while he doesn’t let himself loose or crack jokes that often, he does his best to resonate with your humour. he learnt what makes you smile and giggle simply because the sight of it drives him absolutely wild. once in a blue moon you’ll hear him let out a small joke and then it becomes your mission to keep them coming for the rest of the night.

he tries his best to resist but ultimately fails.

HE HAS THE SOFTEST LITTLE GIGGLE. NOBODY CAN TELL ME OTHERWISE.

how do i know this? well i may or may not have been snooping around one night where i saw the two of you at an empty football field. you were trying oh so hard to keep up with rin teaching you football, you really were, but he’s just too good.

so when he passed the ball to you for you to score at the empty goal, and you missed completely, even losing your balance a little bit, he couldn’t help himself.

frankly anyone that could see that sight would be in shock (i was). his eyes squint together ever so slightly and his smile widens in a way nobody even knew it could and it  just makes anyone's heart warm and fuzzy. 

it’s addictive seeing him laugh but sadly to disappoint all of us, you’re the only one who will ever get to see that sight again.

you like teasing people, rin is no exception. most of the time it’ll go either one of two ways:

he’ll give you a disappointed look and carry on with his day.

he becomes a blushing mess

number 2 will only ever happen in private though. he’ll always tell you to stop but he loves it honestly.

he loves that you’re the only person that can make him react like that.

on a more public side… if your relationship is hard launched, rin will be very protective of you. he doesn’t want the paparazzi invading your life simply because you’re dating him but god can it get funny.

ever since you two got together, he’s started flipping off paparazzi if they get too close and personal (his manager hates it)

will also always have an arm wrapped around you. don’t even think of trying to abandon him in the storm of the media (partially because he’s worried for you, partially cause he’s worried for himself lol)

definitely comes off as the more dominant one to the public eye.

you’d know otherwise though ;)

literally the biggest brat in private.

you know how i mentioned he’s clingy earlier? he’s just as needy. he breathes your attention in like it’s his oxygen and god forbid you neglect him.

if you do though, he’ll start off tame. maybe just being a bit more aggressive with his touches, making you look at him ect. but if you keep ignoring him, he’ll get very bratty. will start off with the whole “i get it, i’m sure your [whatever you’re doing] is more interesting than me.”, then he lays the attitude on harder until you finally cave and give him attention, to which he’ll be all pouty and ignore you.

you see where i’m leading this right?

good.

content warning: nsfw headcanons below

as i mentioned earlier, rin typically comes off as the more dominant one in your relation, to the public eye of course. 

and don’t get me wrong, rin could definitely top, but deep down this man just wants someone to take care of him.

very bratty about it though.

power bottom? 100%

the most bratty out there. will not let you top him without a fight (not that you mind ;) ).

rin could definitely top, don’t get me wrong. but deep down the man just wants to let go and let someone take care of him.

typically i’d say you’re the top/dom in the bedroom, there’s not really much room for discussion about it anyways.

rin will pretend he hates it but i’m sure you can make him take back his words once he’s cumming all over your hands.

if you do ever let rin top you, it’ll be short lived. he’ll either give up or you’ll pin him down and take over.

i mean, he’s fine with it at the end of the day. he just wants to be pampered and spoiled. 🥹

i can’t really imagine rin being all that verbal during sex but he is very vocal. moaning, whining, grunts, the whole package. he tends to grunt the most, simply because he gets embarrassed when he ends up moaning. of course, you don’t give him any choice but to moan. and god does he get loud with his moans.

hope your neighbours are deaf :p

i think both of you are very open to trying new things, in my eyes you’re both very easy at adapting to situations so i can see this also being the case in bed.

but there are a few staples that the two of you enjoy.

rin likes praise, he likes praise a lot. he didn’t know this until you praised how well he was taking you for the first time.

“you’re doing so well rin, my sweet boy is taking me so well.”

yeah that lit something in him. will whore himself out for your praise.

frankly he’s not too keen on degradation, unless it's mixed with praise. considering the fact you’re a good speaker, i cannot see this going wrong in literally any way.

“be a good slut and take me again, ok? you can handle it darling.”

“greedy bitch. you’re so tight, so perfect for me.”

you get the gist.

definitely into being restricted. blindfolds, cuffs, ropes, gags, anything that allows you to do more with him. his personal favourite is probably cuffs. being able to watch you pleasure him while he’s lying there at your disposal turns him on so much.

when he’s not tied up though, his hands are everywhere on your back. he loves it. there’s just something about it that makes him feral. obviously he paints your back red with scratch marks.

it’s like the perfect amount of possessiveness and secrecy for him that just leaves him with no other option but to scratch it up.

you both use pet names in bed. rin likes being called pretty much anything that paises him in some way: “sweet boy”, “good boy”, “angel”.

he’s definitely called you daddy a few times in bed. it started off accidentally, but god the sex was good, so he’s made it a habit of using that pet name to egg you on ;)

all in all, 10/10 sex life (i could never with my crusty ex boyfriends)

sfw honourable mention: i think i remember seeing from our old matchup that you’re an entp. WELL HE’S AN INTJ!!!! YAYAYAYA

i know nowhere near as much about mbti as you but i do know that i’ve never seen an entp x intj duo that hasn’t served cunt

anyways

THANK YOU FOR BEING SO PATIENT SUO <333

it took me a hot minute with my current workload but i finally finished it!!

that being said i really enjoyed writing this once i got round to it

never really done an nsfw matchup before but god i loved this

i am a horny menace to society

[jiveyuncle]

Hi omg!!!!! I just saw the book you posted for TNAHP and I am dying! It looks GLORIOUS!!!!! Turned out so beautiful binded like that! And the art is absolutely stunning, may I ask what company printed it? Like what shop did you use? I’ve wanted to print certain stories just for myself so badly over the years but there are so many places and I can’t decide and this is exactly what I’ve been looking for!!!!! 😍😍😍 thank you so much for sharing!

Hi, anon! Thank you! 💕 I was so happy getting to hold it and put it up on my shelf! Look!!! 😭💕

I want to preface everything I’m about to say with this: if you use a third party service to print any material (fics, art, art in fics, etc.) please, please, please reach out to the author/artist and get permission to use the service before printing! It doesn’t matter if someone else already has permission, make sure *you* have permission. Also consider if the art in the fic belongs to someone other than the writer (like if the work was a collaborative piece or if it features fanart of the fic) and get permission from them, too! You may have to wait for a response, or you may never get one (in which case, don’t print without permission), but it really is worth it to make sure the authors/artists feel comfortable and confident that they keep control over their own work.

This is the first service I’ve used, and I have no experience binding, so I’m just sharing what I did and what I noticed with my untrained eye.

First, the service I used is Barnes and Noble Press. Here’s a link:

You can make books publicly for sale or books strictly private for personal use. If printing fanfic, be certain that you are creating a “personal” print. It will appear like this in your projects section (note the “PERSONAL” banner above the cover art):

As you can see - the price is pretty decent as far as books go! After tax, shipping, and handling costs, this book turned out to be $21.82.

You can choose how you want to customize the materials your book is made up of. Different materials cost different amounts (i.e. printing color pages inside is going to increase your price a lot). If you don’t know where to start, here’s the preference settings I selected for my copy:

Now, understand that they are not editing your book for you - you’re still going to have to do all the formatting and arranging in a document yourself and designing your own cover (so be prepared to still spend a lot of time on this project). They simply print and physically put all the pieces together for you.

Lastly, I want to address quality. While this is far better quality than I could manage on my own, it’s still not 100% up to quality of most books I can purchase in a store. For comparison, I’ll show a couple side-by-side images of the fic print next to my favorite published book, The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater.

Dust jacket: Feels great! Literally no complaints.

The hard cover: A bit cheaper feeling. Definitely noticeable difference with a printed visual texture instead of real texture. The printed texture creased and wore away to reveal the white beneath. It’s visible here after just a few openings of the book. Also, unfortunately, you cannot customize the hardcover under the dust jacket, so no spine labels and you’re stuck with this color blue:

Finally, my biggest concern, the binding of the pages: looks a lot more like a paperback that had its cover glued onto a hardcover than an actual standard hardcover. Again, I’m no expert and idk if that’s normal, what anything is called, or how this affects the lifespan of the book, but you can even see where the spine kinda hovers away from the hardcover casing and how that compares to the The Raven Boys.

Anyway, the service isn’t perfect, no, but it works for what I wanted, looks nice, is user friendly, and allows me to hold a fic I otherwise never would have had the opportunity to. I appreciate it for that.

Hope this was helpful! Print responsibly 😊

[tsumuus]

Hey!! I hope your 555 follower event is still open, I’d love to request a matchup from it!

Anyways, I’d like a Romantic Mha Matchup! Also I think I’d prefer if I was matched with a guy, I Use She/ Her Pronounce and also identify as a Female.

My Personality ok so I’m a Enfp and yeah I’m pretty extroverted and outgoing most of the time but I am definitely not like too outgoing? I love my peace and quiet and when it’s too loud I get frustrated and overwhelmed easily. I also really like taking on responsibilities and I’d consider myself reliable.

I too Love Languages are : acts of service, quality time and physical touch.

My hobbies, so I am an Artist and I Draw a lot, mostly my own characters like stuff from the current dnd campaign my friend is doing or just ocs. I also am a HUGE Pokémon fan and my entire room is deced out in everything Pokémon, mangas, Pokémon cards, Posters, figures, Pushies, magazines, games, pillows. I also love acting and I do it outside of school in a small theater group!

I am really sensitive to food, if the Texture Tase or look isn’t right I just can’t bring myself to physically eat it. It’s not like I don’t love eating bc I do but if something on my pate touches I won’t eat that.

Also I am like in love with sleeping I always try to get as many sleep hours in as I can!

your perfect match is…

₊✩‧₊˚ izuku midoriya ! ˚₊✩‧₊

₊✩‧₊˚ runner ups: mirio togata and denki kaminari ˚₊✩‧₊

✧₊⁺ as an enfp, im sure you're outgoing and social, but you also need moments of peace and quiet to recharge

✧₊⁺ izuku, while initially shy, is someone who can match your energy

✧₊⁺ he's very kind, considerate, and deeply thoughtful

✧₊⁺ he’s not overly extroverted but can be talkative and engaged in the right environment, which makes him a great balance for your more extroverted personality

✧₊⁺ he’s empathetic and understanding, which means he would respect your need for quiet moments and be there when you’re overwhelmed

✧₊⁺ izuku is the kind of person who would absolutely show love through actions

✧₊⁺ always willing to help others, even in small ways

✧₊⁺ he would go out of his way to assist you, whether it's carrying your art supplies or helping you organize your pokémon collection

✧₊⁺ his hero mentality extends to his personal life, so you’d feel deeply cared for with him.

✧₊⁺ he is a listener and loves to spend meaningful time with people he cares about

✧₊⁺ and though he can be shy at first, izuku would gradually become more comfortable with physical affection

✧₊⁺ he’d be the type to give gentle hugs when you’re feeling down, or hold your hand while you’re working on your art

✧₊⁺ once he gets more confident, he'd love sharing these moments with you

✧₊⁺ he is incredibly empathetic, which makes him a perfect match for your food sensitivities

✧₊⁺ he’d be extremely mindful of your preferences and go out of his way to make sure meals are comfortable and enjoyable for you

✧₊⁺ he’s the type who would research restaurants or recipes that accommodate your needs, all without making you feel pressured or uncomfortable

✧₊⁺ i think hes the type of person to prioritize almost everything else over sleep

✧₊⁺ but he would absolutely respect your love for sleep

✧₊⁺ in fact, he might even learn from you how important rest is and try to adopt a healthier sleep schedule

✧₊⁺ he’d be the kind of boyfriend who brings you a blanket while you’re napping or quietly joins you for a lazy afternoon in bed

a/n hope you enjoy! izuku is the loml <3

₊✩‧₊˚ 555 follower event ! ˚₊✩‧₊

main masterlist

[demented-tours]

hello!

i have been a fan of your works since almost a decade and it is safe to say that you’re one of my favourite authors to ever exist. i found your works through a03, specifically through the absolutely incredible dynamic of neji and kiba.

just wanted to come on here and say how much i adore all your works. especially the way you have written sai and captured his personality and autism so well, it holds such a special place in my heart (as do literally every character you have written)

i also wanted ask if there’s anything going to be added to the monoshizukanohi universe. it is beautiful and i am but ravenous for more. even if there is nothing planned, i have been and will continue to cherish the works you have put out there.

i have commented a few times on your works and also try to keep up on instagram but i feel too shy to actually come out here and say all this, hence the anon.

thank you so much for your service! (truly, and for free?! in this economy??? truly blessed)

- L

Well, hello there, Anon!

First off: thank you so much for sharing this with me. Notes like this remind me of why I do what I do, and that keeps me going through the chaos. All the virtual baked goods of your choice and many hugs, (if that's your thing; if not, then enthusiastic happy dances)!

Second: apologies for the small delay in responding; I've been under the weather. Also, if I've not responded to you over on A03, please bear with me, lol. I tend to do responses in batches. Sometimes interaction is difficult for me (neurospicy for the win).

NOW THEN! The good stuff.

Oh man, I love what you love! Writing Neji is just... so delightful. And Kiba's just the perfect foil for so many of my uptight/oblivious characters (ah, Gaara; you never saw him coming... until you definitely did, HA). And oh, Sai and Tenzou! I had no idea how cathartic that story was for me until the final page. I'm so glad you enjoyed those!

As for new Mono stories... Actually, yes. There is one in progress. It's another Origins story, like LET FREEDOM BLEED was. They're sort of the backstory/underpinning stories that star characters referenced and interwoven into what already exists. Keep in mind, I started writing Mono in 2008 (dear lord; where did the time go?); wrote pretty steady until 2014 or so; took a few years of unintentional break; came back to finish LESSONS IN LIVING; and then, well... The characters came knocking, again. I write Mono as a sort of... therapy, if you will, for myself. There's a freedom in writing fanfiction that just hits differently than the books/stories/etc. I write for paid publication. I don't think I knew I was doing that (the therapy thing) when I started, but I can definitely see it now, so this latest story is sort of... eh, a deliberate attempt? Or, like, I know it's helping me work shit out, if that makes sense? It doesn't impact the story, exactly; it's more just I know WHY I'm choosing to do this to myself, lol, lol.

I ramble. I do that. Point being: I AM working on something. I don't mind sharing that it's Itachi's story. It's called THE BELOVED MARTYR, and it is the longest thing I have literally ever written, and it's not done. Right now it's sitting at (are you sitting down?) roughly 900 pages, or 370,500 words. It spans Itachi's entire life (he's about 40 or so in current Mono canon) - so we see him as a boy, we see it when Sasuke is born, family, growing up, and just the sheer, unadulterated mayhem that is his existence. It has a cast of about 50 original characters (there's going to be an index of who's-who whenever this thing gets posted) plus all the usual Mono boys. It's basically my version of fandom canon--how the Uchiha family is old, powerful, and believes itself to be the shepherds of a new order under their control, but translated into the Mono world reality. Oligarchy, old Russian power, older Japanese power, the movers and shakers and often-criminal intrigue that affect global change and disaster... And in the heart of it all, one man who wants to stop the violence and heal himself and those he loves. One of my greatest loves in fandom is figuring out how canon could translate into my version of reality, and this one... considering Itachi's arch... is enormous and sad and lovely and aching all in one. I started writing it when my mother was diagnosed with stage 3 cancer (she's in recovery), and, well... It's also MY healing journey, in a way, lol--not just from that, but in life.

Grand themes, I grant you, but there's also humor and OH SO MUCH kink and violence and that nitty-gritty-teeth-clench thing that I loved about Rhythm & Bruise. We also get Nagato's backstory (my version of him), and yep, we get to see how Sasuke and Naruto meet and fall in love. People have been asking for that for years, and I've never really been drawn to write it, but it's a part of this because Sasuke is such a huge part of Itachi's life and purpose.

SO. Yeah. Um... in progress. I don't post things until they're done--I learned that lesson with LESSONS IN LIVING. I'm working on this in and around other novels and stories, not to mention the day job, which is ALSO writing, among other things, so it might be a while, yet. Occasionally, I post on this Tumblr (which is basically the only social media I use, these days, as i HATE Twitter/X or whatever and Instagram isn't made for words, really, etc.), so if you feel like hanging out, please do!

This is probably more than you bargained for with your lovely ask, but hopefully that's not a bad thing!

Regardless, I am delighted that you enjoy the stories, and I thank you so much for letting me know you're here.

All good things to you and yours, <3Dee

[roo-bastmoon]

Going on rest...

Puppykitties, I have some pretty serious health stuff going on. Lots of test and scans and playing around with treatments coming up in the following weeks, all while trying to make sure the sarcoma doesn't come back, etc. etc.

Now, nobody worry too much for me; I'm not in immediate danger. It could just be I need to go off some meds that I cannot tolerate and then slowly experiment with trying other meds that may help resolve some frankly quite crappy symptoms. Or, a bigger battle could be coming up; I don't know yet. I'm only entertaining thoughts of getting completely healthy either way!

Things probably won't look any different on my blog, except I may take longer to respond to folks. I have a few fun things lined up for you guys in the queue, so it won't be dead quiet here. But I may post and comment a bit less...

And I definitely need to take myself out of any fandom dramas, only because I really, truly do not have the energy. This is TMI, but I'm struggling to even do basic daily living activities like shower or go get my mail, half the time. I can't add any stress or heartache on top of what are shaping up to be already exhausting days.

ARMY fandom is where I go to experience joy and gratitude and community. I thank you for giving me that gift.

I want to rest up, get stronger, come back energized and so I can help out with the other solo albums we have coming up before military service.

But if you see a bit less of me, nobody assume the worst or anything! I still love philosophical debates and fan projects and celebrating our boys so I'll pop round when I can!!

I just have to step away from online life for a bit to stabilize real life, is all.

I give you my word I won't just disappear on you; and when I am around, I will always try to give you the best of me. I say this now because I didn't want anyone to worry later, when it may be harder to boot up and interact.

I'm gonna beat this, whatever this is! In the meantime, everyone stay wonderful and be good to each other. Don't miss me too much. ;-)

Lots and lots of love,

Roo