#this is some kinda horror btw. maybe it’s body horror? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mulders-too-large-shirt · 19 days

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s4 episode 2 thoughts

ah, this episode! i have heard it is very scary. so i’m curious to see how creepy it can be. usually what gets me the most is body horror, at least so far.

i’m really not a horror fan so i’m interested to see if this will push my limits or just be kinda silly. remember that evil AI in like s1 episode 8? and when it was unplugged it said “noooo, brad :(“ or something like that? yeah that one just made me giggle lol

(author's note after seeing the episode: what...)

(additional author's note: read to the end to see why i think this episode might be actually about the civil war's long-term consequences)

how far we have progressed since then!

let us begin!!!

we open with a storm and some scary music. pretty intense for the first few seconds. oh, now someone is giving birth. it is very dark and hard to see but it appears these individuals do not look like your average fellow off the street.

GAG! slurping noises are produced as the baby emerges. birth counts as body horror btw i do NOT make the rules. EUGH the umbilical cord…

(sorry y’all pls take no offense to those who have or desire children someday... it’s just something that makes me feel dizzy to watch but i support your dreams and choices i promise 🙏)

okay, but the baby is crying so that’s usually a good sign right? like better than a quiet baby, i think.

but a bunch of people are leaving after the delivery and i thought they would stick around to do things like look at the baby and see if it is healthy and stuff. but no. they’re leaving. where are they going...

they’re digging a hole?????? WHAT DA HELL. BABY IN THE HOLE??!!!!!! while someone cries terribly. OMG the grief…

WHAT THE HELL???

what have i gotten myself into……

intro time. always gonna think about that tweet regarding scully’s glamour shot on her ID. anyway just in case you forgot the truth IS out there.

so we see some kids in a place called home, pennsylvania, and they’re playing baseball. you know how children are, with their baseball. it’s as serious to them as a senator running a reelection campaign.

kid knocks the ball over the fence, and onto the property of “the peacocks”. the kids will NOT go get the ball, and instead find a spare. seems they prepared for this, or could maybe find a place that isn’t next to a very scary house to play ball, but i understand spacial constraints.

OH???? the kid is digging his foot in to go swing and…. BLOODY PUDDLE???? THIS MUST BE THE BABY FROM BEFORE????

he backs away as we see a tiny hand in the dirt. that poor kid omfg he must have been traumatized… and his sneakers were so bright and white…..

cutscene to mulder in the field after all the kids have fled! ah, mulder loves his baseball. in fact, he even sniffs it. he’s practicing his pitching LMAOOOO please be serious for FIVE minutes.

scully is measuring the hole while he does all this. in fact, he is not stopping. it just keeps going while she talks about the angle of the shovel.

she makes some quip about quitting the FBI and becoming a spokesperson for the ab roller, when he SHOVES THE BALL UNDER HER NOSE and says “smell that” THIS MAN IS SUUUUUCH A WEIRDO I LOVE HIM

“it’s perfume. eau de ball” (stupid little mulder smile)

very strong juxtaposition between baby death and a daydreaming mulder, but that is the sort of thing we have come to expect from this show. he seems enchanted.

WAIT! he’s talking about his sister… “all-day pickup games out on the Vineyard” and going down to the beach… no cell phones or faxes… oh man, this baseball has him talking about his family :(

“mulder, if you had to do without a cell phone for two minutes, you’d lapse into catatonic schizophrenia” <- WELL GET HIM! it is true. he is always making calls and then abruptly hanging up.

feels weird to be smiling like a fool at my screen as these two talk about their lives after seeing the opening scene... but here we are!

“scully, you don’t know me as well as you think you do. you know my work demands that i live in a big city, but if i had to settle down, build a home, it’d be a place like this”

OHHHHH MY GOSH

1. he has though about settling down and having a life outside of his work, and this is such a character reveal, and i know he wants like a small army of children, and

2. i just KNOW those words are gonna come back and bite him when this place is revealed to be some sort of cult

she says it would be like living in mayberry which i had to google BUT: it is the town from the andy griffith show. ah, i see. so very quaint.

someone pulls up to see them and i paused at just the right time to see that mulder’s shirt is very baggy and living up to my URL, which is good because sometimes i worry it’s a bit TOO niche, but i made it after watching 4 episodes so i’m too attached to change it now. meanwhile, scully’s coat is wonderfully sleek and it’s a fun little contrast.

this is sheriff taylor, who says this is a very small town, and there are no real suspects. mulder asks about the peacocks next door, and the sheriff goes… quiet. apparently three boys lived there, and their parents were hurt in an accident. the sheriff and his team tried to administer care to the parents, but the boys took the bodies home??? that’s. odd.

so these peacocks have no electricity, grow their own food, and… are inbred. the sheriff says they are feeble and sad, and wouldn’t have any idea what they are talking about. which just makes me think they are the prime suspects.

the sheriff is saying that he loves his town, it is quiet and peaceful, and he knew someday it would change when something terrible happened. when he saw “it” in the ground, he knew that day had come. he seems convinced it’s an outsider but also he is purposefully ignoring all the evidence in the other direction. and he wants their help, but he doesn’t want anything to change.

(i see... this is about the terrible secrets of small towns and the wish to keep everything quiet and preserve an idyllic image rather than make meaningful change)

apparently they were recommended to help out when “the victim” was described, so mulder says that maybe they should go take a look.

and whew, when they cut to a bundle of blankets next to some cans of spam (that look like they’re partially covered to hide the branding?) it’s a lot. it's a lot to handle, for me, emotionally, but i guess that's a fairly normal reaction. the sheriff just pulled the baby right out of the fridge. we also meet a deputy named barney.

they shove poor scully in a tiny bathroom with just a sink in it to do her work, because they don’t want anyone else seeing the autopsy go down. the sheriff says they can’t do it in his office, because everyone knows he never locks his office door, and they’d start rumors. this whole small town thing is starting to seem quite oppressive.

mulder is also here in this tiny closet-like bathroom, and i can feel the claustrophobia from here. despite the lack of space, scully begins.

and she is taken aback, but not as much by the fact that it is a child but that said child “has been afflicted by every rare birth defect known to science”. mulder has his arm on the wall leaning in and watching in a way that is weird for the space.

we only see a few shots of the baby- thankfully, because i don't think i could handle seeing any more of it than we do- but it’s enough to make me go whew, shout-out to the props department for making something that looks like that, because that is how i cope with seeing things on this show that make me nearly faint

she is reciting the various things that this child has been born with, and mulder says that they can probably rule out murder, right? but scully says idk… it looks like it WAS murder, actually. dirt in the nose.

lord, they walk out after doing that and somehow don’t need to like, down some vodka or something to cope.

“imagine all a woman’s hopes and dreams for her child, and then nature turns so cruel. what must a mother go through?” oh my gosh is scully gonna make me cry…

“apparent not much in this case, if she just threw it out in the trash”, says mulder, while they sit on a bench on he is manspreading like you would not believe. but i assume they are in a tough spot mentally so manspreading is permitted in this situation.

“i guess i was just projecting on myself”, she says, and oh my gosh does scully want kids someday…. stop i’ll cry!! i’ll cry.

“well, just find yourself a man with a spotless genetic makeup and a really high tolerance for being second-guessed and start pumping out the little uber-Scullys” he says, rubbing her back.

and i can’t decide if this is funnier if he’s truly and deeply down terrible for her and suggesting subtly that HE could be that man, or if he’s just being a really good pal. so i’m gonna turn around both options in my head for a while and see which sticks.

“what about your family?” “hm? aside from the need for corrective lenses and a tendency to be abducted by extraterrestrials involved in an international governmental conspiracy, the mulder family passes genetic muster” (said with a celebratory flourish of his hands)

oh my gooooooosh i love them both so bad. he is SUCH a nerd. and his constant need to joke about the horrible things… even when they are approaching a serious topic, life ambitions and the desire to start a family, he has to go in there with some sarcasm to avoid getting Too Serious...

see? he has good genes. allegedly. go forth.

but he sobers up, points out that the child they had to just examine is a serious tragedy, and some likely very young parents are probably incredibly scared. but this isn’t really an FBI matter. 10 points to him for being serious for once.

she is brainstorming how such a thing could happen- “now, we all have a natural instinct to propagate” “do we?” <- ace mulder subtext i see you…

scully is convinced that the woman who gave birth to that child did it against her will, and mulder points out that kidnapping is a bureau matter… she seems determined to save someone caught in a horrible circumstance here, and i admire that about her, the sense of justice she has. she gets up to go investigate.

but he calls out: “hey scully- i never saw you as a mother before” <- OH MY GOD??? OH MY GOD. i can’t even begin to process that right now. oh my gosh it seems like he has wanted kids SO terribly… but scully never really brought the subject up, which is fine because not everyone wants kids!! but what does it say about her character if she DOES…? i am analyzing.

i hope she is happy someday with whatever she chooses. music is playing as he looks after her. do not for a second think i missed that little musical flourish and gaze combo.

so, they go to the peacock's farm. where they find a chopped off pig’s head on the steps. it doesn’t seem to bother them at all, which must be a testament to the strength of bureau training.

mulder tries to do his usual “enter first and ask questions later” thing, but scully STOPS HIM, saying there is no probable cause.

WHAT!!! for once they did NOT JUST BURST IN!!??? their random entering of places is one of my favorite running gags and for once they didn’t. oh she is serious about this one…

so they just peek inside instead…. and then they get their guns and go inside after seeing a table covered in blood. oh…. the scissors from before…. yes, bloody table = probable cause

there is blood everywhere, and the footprint from the crime scene matches the footprint in blood on the floor. AND they find a bloody shovel. well!!! we know who did it now!!! but… where are they??

it is soooo dark and creepy as they make their way through the house. and someone is WATCHING THEM THE DARK as they investigate. BLEUGH we get an extreme closeup on their eyes…….

i am spooked.

now scully is on the phone with sheriff taylor, who is describing the warrants for the arrest of the peacocks he put out, while mulder slams a TV in their hotel room, trying to get it to work. typical mulder behavior

(i bet they felt a need to incorporate some silly moments to lighten out the heavy heavy heavy content, and honestly i didn't think it would work, but for me it kinda is. don't get me wrong, it's still VERY heavy, but it's not start to finish just trauma like we got in calusari, which stands out to me as being the darkest and least fun episode in the series so far. but let mulder sniff a baseball a little and smack a TV and our agents talk about having a family and it is slightly less overwhelming in terms of tone)

and she brings up the white cadillac they found there but he says get a lot of abandoned cars. damn, who is abandoning a cadillac...

what is this sheriff hiding…?

he pulls out his gun from a locked box, and seems deeply regretful. before he puts it back in the box… hmm…

back at the peacock farm. the brothers are packing what looks like clubs into the cadillac. and i notice how silent and scary the whole thing is… no music whatsoever.

meanwhile, mulder is doing a little dance to try and get the TV working, which scully is smiling at him in a way that implies long term affection and exhaustion. i want to get those gifs and save them upon my blog forever and ever.

he’s trying to watch the knicks game, but as she heads out, he says “goodnight mom”, and she looks… uncomfortable. i mean, it’s a weird thing to say, but still. he says a lot of weird things and she doesn’t always look sort of… hmm. idk, the only phrase that comes to mind is “cut to the quick”. i WILL be analyzing that.

she tries to leave and the lock is broken, so he places a chair underneath, which might do something but like… probably not a ton.

anyway, back to the cadillac, where the brothers are pulling out while listening to music. where are they going….

sheriff taylor is up late at night, “taking one last look around before it all changes”. oh, he loves his town… but it is rotten, like mulder says. AND HIS WIFE DOESN’T LOCK THE DOOR AS THEY COME IN!!! NOOOO!

the brothers are on the move, while scully sleeps and mulder watches a fuzzy documentary on hyenas?? okay. king behavior.

but back at the sheriff’s house, he can hear the brothers approaching, and pulling into his yard. oh no…. he looks out the window and the brothers aren’t there. so did they already get in…?

he’s going for the gun, he says, and they enter his house. and he’s got a baseball bat, but where is the gun! they have clubs! like the kind the bad guys in zelda use!!! they look very very dangerous!

he hears them approach as his wife is under the bed……… and he swings his bat at the intruder, but he is barreled right over, it’s three on one, and they beat him RIGHT AS HIS WIFE SEES THE WHOLE THING FROM UNDER THE BED. and they sniff and sniff and FIND HER UNDER THERE????????

what the fuck. who came up with this…….. that song is still playing as they get in their car and leave. i'm sure the song also has some significance to the meaning of what these guys are doing but tbh i have never heard it before so it's hard to unpack.

the deputy is at the scene of the crime the next day, smoking a cigarette, hands shaking in terror. he had come over to give the sheriff a report… and found them that way.

so the owner of the cadillac was found in baltimore, she had left it behind after running out of gas. this is not a lead in the slightest.

mulder is investigating the scene while scully pulls out files from the crime lab, and it is. well, it is very bad, to put it bluntly. the crime scene is horrific.

she says that the crime scene messed up the tests on the infant… but mulder proposes that… perhaps each of the brothers were the father? she talks about how babies are made and how that makes no sense, but he proposes that generations of inbreeding could maybe make such a mutation. but she says that isn’t possible, they’d need a female family member and there aren’t any left. hmm...

scully wants to try and trail them right now and go save whoever it was that was forced to give birth, but mulder points out that they are outnumbered and could further endanger the victim. what to do…? i don’t know the answer.

oh! the deputy barges in and says he’ll take them up there so it’s three against three. and they have guns, which should give them the advantage. okay. shoutout to the deputy.

mulder seems suspicious however, and says his suddenly entry was a bit “too chuck bronson for me”. so yeah, i had to google that too. this chuck fellow is the guy from machine gun-kelly. and NOT that sleazy rapper one. the more you know.

scully is confused, though, because why would they kill the sheriff? he didn’t even investigate them. unless they somehow overheard them talking about issuing the arrest warrants while in their house… and they are operating under the assumption that the brothers were not in the house when they were…. but we know that someone was in hiding!!!

OH! back to the house. one of the brothers declares he is hungry. we finally get a semi-decent look at them, and they are incredibly gruesome. someone is under the bed still….

and when they declare that they are “ready”, they strip down. they knew this day- and change- was coming, and all they can do is be ready for it. this is our home. and this is the way it’s gonna stay.

again, i ask, who came up with this……

the deputy and our agents are on the property, now. deputy wants to come in from the front and let them take the back. a brave thing to offer, but i am slightly suspicious of him. they have wired headsets on and bullet proof vests on, and he is going in.

so they’re approaching- scully and mulder in the field, the deputy out in front. scully is peeking through binoculars but she doesn’t see anyone inside!!! it has to be a trap!!!!

OH MY GOSH!!! just as scully tells the deputy to not go in, he opens the door and an AXE SWINGS DOWN AND CHOPS HIS HEAD OFF!!!!!

i am sorry for being suspicious of you, deputy. may you rest in peace.

mulder’s reciting his facts from the hyena documentary. they are witnessing something akin to prehistoric humanity. but he has an idea: divert them out of the house, so they don't have to deal with their traps. it is a good idea.

so they are sneaking into the pig pen, which had to be a pain to shoot. “scully, would you think less of me as a man if i told you i was kind of excited right now?” he asks as they try to get the pigs in a line to topple like dominoes or something???

“is there some secret farmer trick to getting these things moving?” “i don’t know!” lmaooo these city slickers...

they’re shoving pigs straight out the gate, and she’s trying to say some magic pig words from babe, which her nephew apparently watches all day. you know what that means...

! SCULLY LORE REVEAL ! she has a nephew!

but there are more pressing matters at hand than a lore reveal as one of the brothers emerges, falling for their piggy trap. we see them in daylight now, and it is an unsettling sight.

as the brothers try to herd the pigs back in, the agents sneak in, with mulder picking up a giant log to poke open the door. and it is a good thing he did that, because a trap descends right on the log that surely would have beheaded him as it did the deputy if not for the log taking the axe/weapon thingy for him. thank you for your service, giant log.

they sneak in beneath the log and close the door as if nothing went down. scully is yelling to see if anyone is in the house. they’re doing a sweep in excellent coordination. mulder mumbles “oh no” and i’m scared but he just picks up a newspaper that says elvis is dead and frowns 😭 his ass cannot be serious for more than five minutes

but something approaches!!!! they enter the bedroom and see photos of generations and generations of this family, with varying conditions. and at this moment mulder notices that someone is under the bed!!

he’s trying to say that they’re here to help, but whoever is down there is screaming, screaming at them to go away. so scully tries to move the bed, but she’s strapped to a board underneath the bed, and they pull her out and…. oh my gosh, she has no limbs, i think? it’s dark and hard to tell. they keep her under the bed..........

mulder says they’re going to get her home, but after a glance at the pictures on the wall, scully says that she already IS home. it’s mrs. peacock. the mother of the family that they thought died in the car accident!!!!!!

she is sobbing and they roll her back under the bed, with mulder having a horrific look on his face, unable to process what he just saw.

mulder is back on the prowl to find the other brothers. and he tasks scully with trying to convince mrs. peacock that she is the only one who can get “her boys” out of here without them being hurt. a mighty task, indeed.

she walks away, and he says “scully, w-watch your step” and he’s worried about her and i want to cry. oh!! we see a trip wire……….

so scully goes back to mrs. peacock, explaining that she needs medical attention, and the agents are here to help. she says that this is their home- why leave it? she has to see if the boys are okay.

and she lost her limbs in the accident that killed her husband. “sewed me up just like the family learned in the war of northern aggression” OH! so that is an WILD thing to say in pennsylvania. but it was at this point i thought i was putting the pieces together for an extended metaphor...

but she insists she felt no pain, and that no one in the family does. and they’re such good boys. scully points out they murdered three people, and mrs. peacock says she can tell scully has no children, but maybe someday she’ll learn the pride and the love “when you know your boy will do anything for his mother”

well i think you probably just made her swear that off forever!!! so!!!!!

the brothers see mulder in the window, and they start to run in. and as he holds one at gun point, another tries to bash in his head, so scully shoots him. but this isn’t enough to take him down! and the other one joins in on their attack, so it’s two against one tag teaming mulder!!! oh my gosh scully can you use your perfect aim???

yes, she can, but despite emptying the whole clip, they aren’t hurt!!!

they’re running and running and dodging a whole lot of terrible blows, and scully yells out that she has the mother! she trips over the wire and one of the traps falls RIGHT into one of the brothers, seemingly finally taking him out.

she notices marks on the floor, and when they go back for mrs. peacock, they can’t find the other brother or the mother.

so they put out an APB for them, saying that in time, they’ll catch them. but he counters with “i think time already caught them, scully”

cutscene to the cadillac- where mrs. peacock says that “sherman and george were good boys”- SHERMAN? a union name? edmund, sherman, and george…

it ends with mrs. peacock saying that there will be more peacocks, and they have to find a new home, make a new family to be proud of. she is in the trunk of the car while she says this.

okay so first thoughts: WHAT THE FUCK.

this episode definitely lived up to its horrific reputation. but i can’t figure out exactly what it is it MEANS!

beyond exploring the horrific topics of generational abuse, i feel that there is something a bit deeper going on here. i actually felt so compelled to see if i was imagining things that i went on the wikipedia page for the episode, which spoke of its themes on the american dream and the nuclear family. those themes i see for sure- how mulder was talking about settling down in a place like this, so quaint and quiet, how they started discussing their own desire for a family, and how every idyllic thought about what a family could be was upended on its head with the peacocks. that made sense to me. but...

that line- “the war of northern aggression”- was what the confederates called the american civil war to justify their rebellion. this is notable for the fact that this whole episode took place in pennsylvania, which was a union state- but somehow, they got so twisted up in their own hatred that they’re parroting the lost cause ideology over a century after the war.

the repeated motifs of “things being the way they are in a small town, in our town, in our home”- is that a symbol for the festering of post-civil war wounds? the inability for the war to make meaningful change when it came to the attitudes of the people on the losing side, who continue- even to this day- to spew their hateful ideology? the inbreeding metaphor- is that a representation of how hate begets hate begets hate, generation after generation, compounding and corrupting by the lack of intervention from outsiders who are too afraid to change “the way things are” and call out harmful behavior? and the newspaper from elvis’s death… is that another allusion to the family (or perhaps certain parts of the country) living entirely in the past, in addition to their lack of electricity and water, just stewing in their own hatred? even the name- home- reminds me of the “house divided cannot stand” rhetoric. is this talking about the rot of "back in the good ol' days" thinking?

or if not a metaphor for the country, and instead just the horror of abuse? of how people can feel that things are the way that they are, and so that makes it correct, no matter what the cost? about how warped perceptions of family can be made and shaped? and the fact that mrs. peacock went along with all of this, despite being the biggest victim of the family... is that to speak on the twisted nature of gender roles and how they are weaponized in familial abuse?

i have to clarify that i am not an expert on abuse in the slightest; i am just trying to work through the themes of what i just saw. you know how it is on this blog; i do my best to interpret the big issues, but also recognize that i can only see and comment upon so much.

i'm really, really curious to hear how you interpreted the episode, though. or how audiences have understood it in the past, or if it has ever been re-evaluated. what did the cast and crew have to say on it? i want to know.

man. this is gonna really make me ponder. i want to know. it was too purposeful to just be a “wouldn’t it be fucked up if…” sort of situation.

regardless of the terror, i actually thought this episode was pretty good. it felt cohesive, not just a sideshow of horrible things to make you feel shocked. and we learned more about our characters- their ambitions in life, the possibility of a family someday dangling over their heads, and the terror associated with everything that could go wrong. i think there is always some fear about starting a family (i wouldn't know, but i do read books and stuff), and for scully to just now vocalize her thoughts on the subject and to immediately see this case- i can only imagine what it did to her thought process.

i thought the more light-hearted elements were working at the beginning- mulder's TV dance, baseball time, the merits of their genetics, family talk- worked well at first. but by the end it was just... damn. that was a lot. maybe that is the indication of a successful episode, that it can take you along heavy subject matter with a sense of character analysis and horror, but end with just terror.

i'm not a horror fan outside of this show, so the balancing of the heavy and the humor always baffles me a little bit. i don't know how other materials do it, so i can't really say if it could have been done better or worse. i think the important part though is that they don't turn the tragedy itself into the joke. it wasn't giving "point and laugh at the horrible peacock family!" it was finding humor in other situations, that ultimately still surrendered to the sober feeling of what humanity can do.

whew. this one is definitely gonna stick with me for a while, and i’ll need like 12 hours to formulate my thoughts into something comprehensible. but, you ask, did you like the episode?

yes! while i'm not sure i'd watch it again for funsies, i thought our agents had to confront some inner demons while also learning a lot about them together and individually, which is exactly the thing i want in an episode. i think it brought them closer and they understand each other better, and i think we're getting into some real juicy parts of their relationship. i can't stop thinking about him rubbing her back- how terribly devoted they are to each other, regardless of if either of them can put that into words. those dynamics of devotion that go beyond words- it's so special to me.

and sure, i'll take the bait, and daydream about them living together... i am not above fan service in the slightest. it is me, the fan, who loves to be serviced.

but again. i'm spooked.

#but PLEASE: tell me what you thought of this episode. like i'm BEGGING you.#did you like it? did you hate it? were you spooked? did you think it had a deeper meaning? is it the scariest in the show?#does this episode have wild behind the scenes lore? or a dedicated fan base? or a hateful fan base?#please share all of the things...#maybe someday if enough people would bother to read it i'll make a full post on the things i see in parallel to american history #so if you'd ever read that please just sort of yell at me #sometimes i read into things too much and maybe it stops being fun after a while so i need to know #sometimes when we go from A to Z and back in terms of tone my recaps feel all over the place in a way that doesn't really happen as much #when watching the show visually. some tonal things are hard to translate to written media.#anyway! i need to know #juni's x files liveblog #the x files #txf

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scarletta-ruan · 2 years

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hi hi, could you do a headcanon with chuuya and dazai where reader hides behind them when scared/shy??? thanks and have a good week!

CHUUYA AND DAZAI WHERE READER HID BEHIND THEM WHEN THEY SCARED OR SHY

WARNING: OOC, soft!characters, character acted like they were your heroine, mention of some nicknames (small candy, Belladonna), shy or scared reader, reader is female btw

TYPE: Headcanon

PAIRING: Osamu Dazai || Chuuya Nakahara x fem!reader (seperately)

WORDCOUNTS: 0.6k+ words

NOTES: Your request is here, sorry for being late on the writing after all. It is kinda short so I hope you will enjoy it.

1. Chuuya Nakahara

How could he deny you hiding behind him? I might say that Chuuya loved how you hid behind him a lot.

Chuuya would feel that he was the only person who was born to protect you, and he would be proud of it a lot.

Okay, let's imagine that when you first meet his Mafia family like Kouyou, Mori, or maybe his colleague like The Black Lizard. You were walking beside Chuuya, and his hand held yours to make you feel calm but you were too worried to meet them.

“Aw, my little candy, you don't need to worry about that. They are all our family, after all, they would be happy to see you, of course.”

As the door of the room opened you immediately hid behind his back because you were too shy to look at the people who were present there. Maybe you did not know, but you accidentally caused Chuuya’s face to be as red as yours when you hid behind his back.

Man, Chuuya still introduced you to the new people here but some of his speeches would mess up because he found your cuteness distracted him from saying.

Another situation here was when you felt scared. Recently, you had just watched a horror movie so when you laid your back on the shared bed with Chuuya and decided to close your eyes because you no need to worry about when he was here with you after all.

Suddenly, you heard a noise resounding from downstairs, that sound made your body shiver and caused you some goosebumps. You knew that you had to get out of bed and then checked out on it, that was the reason here, you were so scared when it came to you going alone.

Finally, you had to wake Chuuya up for him to go with you. Because you were too scared so you hid behind his back, Chuuya’s hand held yours tightly as you held his shirt in your hand.

“Don’t worry, I’m here. No one can scare you, my darling.”

Chuuya’s heart felt like he was in Heaven when you trusted him like this, he comforted you while walking downstairs to check out what was happening.

2. Osamu Dazai

He would be surprised at first, Dazai never had anyone to hide behind his back just to make them feel safe and you were the first one who made it.

This was your first time meeting up with his colleague at the Armed Detective Agency, Dazai was meant to introduce you to his own acquaintances. And when you felt so shy and cling dearly behind him.

He felt happy that you trust him dearly with all of your heart.

Might tease you a little bit but not too bad, because he did not want you to cry in front of him.

“My, my, are you being a shy, cute kitten? Oh, my love. You had no idea how I felt about it.”

Another situation was when you were scared, let’s imagine that you and Dazai were hand in hand, walking on the crowded street. As you saw something afraid of you, for example, the person who always bullied you at work or at school.

And when you hid behind his back because you were so scared of them, Dazai would be your hero. He stood in front of you and held your hand tight in his just to make sure that no one could harm you at all.

If you were crying because of scaring them, Dazai would whisper something just to calm you down.

“Sh, sh, you are alright as long as you are here beside me, my Belladonna.��

#bsd dazai x reader #osamu dazai x reader #dazai x you #dazai x reader #dazai x y/n #dazai x fem reader #chuuya x fem!reader #chuuya x y/n #chuuya x you #chuuya x reader #bsd x female reader #bsd x you #bsd x y/n #bsd x reader

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wuffgang-ameowdeus-moozart · 1 year

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Aren't you tired of forced romances with no chemistry that only take away from the actually interesting plot? Don't you just want media where romance isn't portrayed as being superior and more important than (queer)platonic relationships?

Well, my exhausted aro ass is too, so here are a few tricks and wisdoms I've gathered over my years of being a-spec (which is all of them) on how to avoid romance (in media) in a very allonormative society 💚🤍🩶🖤

(this is a rec list btw. no I am not shitting on the shows that I tagged, quite the opposite)

1. Middle Grade

I get if you aren't really into that, because it is kind of annoying to be pointed to literal children's literature when all you want is a story that isn't constantly being interrupted by describing the main guy's heated eyes for the twentieth time.

However.

It is true that in middle grade, friendship is always more important than romance. Because, let's face it. Making two eleven year old characters kiss is kinda weird. So even if there is a romance, it isn't very prominent and treated more like friendship and/or a puppy crush. Plus some stories get surprisingly dark?!?!

Examples

- Howl's Moving Castle (Diana Wynne Jones), technically a romance in the end, but mostly focused on found family, shenanigans, and finding your own value

- House of Many Ways (DWJ). Yes, again. I really like her books okay? They always have something so fantastical and whimsical about them. This is my other favorite book by her and it has literally no romance at all. Plus a hmc cameo that is so fun !!

- Coraline (Neil Gaiman). Maybe this is cheating because I never actually read it. However. a) the movie traumatized me. b) Wybie was added to the movie, he doesn't exist in the book, so if "power of friendship" isn't your thing this will be great. Probably vibes over plot.

Flyte (Angie Sage). Technically this is the second book, but I never read the first one and still understood everything. Once again, no romance at all. A fun read, which can get surprisingly dark at times.

2. Short Story Collections

Once again, I get it if it isn't your thing. Short stories are - as the name reveals - short. Which means: no worldbuilding, very limited narrator, open ending, no time to really get attached to characters, etc.

But.

The cool thing about collections, is that they always have a certain theme. And as long as the theme is not romance, romance will not be the focus. Even if there is a romantic relationship, it will be used to explore this theme since there simply isn't time for anything else.

Examples:

Life Ceremony (Sayaka Murata) This is the book that actually made me figure out: hey! I do actually like short stories !! The main theme is basically about being different and it plays a lot with body horror and the perception of your own body in contrast with how society sees it. There is even a story about two women who platonically live together and raised multiple children!

Canterbury Classics: Classic Tales of Horror (introduction by Ernest Hilbert). As the name suggests, this is a collection of horror short stories, featuring well-known authors such as Bram Stoker, Edgar Allan Poe or Charlotte Perkins Gilman. As these are classic old tales, the language is a bit complicated at times and you can read them for free on Gutenberg. However, the book is very very pretty and the introduction is very interesting (Origins of the genre, specific tropes and monsters, etc.)

3. Podcasts

PODCASTS!!! If you follow me, you are probably already aware of those. However, in case you don't, let me introduce you to the wonderful world of Audiodramas.

The cool thing about Podcasts is that pretty much anyone can do it. All you need is an idea, a mic, a lot of motivation, and you're pretty much set to go. No producers or publishers you need to get approval from. So it is only natural that this medium is filled to the brim with queer creators. Basically every character is somewhat queer. It's awesome.

Examples:

- The Silt Verses. I adore TSV. I listened to the first season like, four times. (the second one is good too but OH MY GOD THE FIRST ONE). And one of the main characters is canonically and explicitly aro!! Sister Carpenter, I love you with my whole being. And the great thing is, it is very clear that the writers love her, too!! There is a lot (like a LOT) of body horror so it isn't for everybody. But if you think you can handle it I really recommend it. (Plus, not any romance plotlines at all !!)

- Wolf 359. This is one of the older ones and it is really good. It's a bunch of restless and very unwell people stuck in a spaceship under the unforgiving rule of capitalism. However bad you imagine it, I can assure you it is worse. But the really cool thing is that there literally isn't any romance at all. Like, there are great m/f friendships but they never even hint towards a romance. Some people are so unused to that that they literally ship the main dude with the fucking robot AI. (don't worry, not an actual romance plot).

- Girl in space. I am sure you will be absolutely shook to know that this one also takes place in space. It is about a girl. In space. Shocking, I know. Except that she has been on her own for well over a year when suddenly a fleet of strange ships arrive and kidnap her. There is also a very asshole-y robot. And questions about what makes us human. And found family!! And a goat. And cheese. Just go listen to it okay. This is also one of the shortest ones of the list, so maybe a good start.

- Malevolent. I have to confess that I personally am not a huge fan of this one? Like the premise is really cool - a detective who wakes up blind and with a demon in his head who can see through the detectives eyes. What the fuck?, you may ask yourself. So does Arthur Lester. Mysteries and other dimensions and a whole lot of pain ensues. Harlan is undeniably an awesome VA and a great writer, but his stories just seem a bit too repetitive to me? Nonetheless I know of lots of people who enjoy it a lot. Trying to define the relationship between Arthur and John (his demon) is perhaps the biggest mystery of them all. (Jk. there are multiple murders and stuff. they've really got other priorities)

- Middle:Below. This is another short one and probably the least famous of this list? It's about this funky lil dude with a ghost roommate and a cat who can talk (.....or can it?). There is a m/f friendship but it never turns into a romance (wow it is possible!!). They all go on adventures on the dimension between life and death. Despite the description, this is literally just a comedy. A bit spooky at best. Reminds me a bit of scarier kids cartoons like gravity falls.

4. "Gay" movies/series in countries with homophobic censorship

Now you may think, "hey that seems like a bit of an asshole move!". And you would be 100% correct in thinking that.

However.

It does also mean that the main relationship of the story can never be explicitly romantic. They can allude to it, they can try to show it. But they can never confirm. So it is very easy to interpret them as having a QPR. (because tbh I don't think I've ever seen one on television.)

Examples:

The Untamed. Look. I am aware that the first episode is so fucking atrocious, all right? And no, the CGI does in fact never get better. And sometimes the translated subtitles are a bit awkward. But I swear that it is so good. Trust me on this one, okay? Just make it through the first ep. It's a wild ride. Lan Zhan I love you. (However the book it is based on (written by a woman) depicts them being in an explicitly romantic relationship, with lots of very inaccurate and badly researched smut, so the fandom pretty much sees them as exclusively romantic.)

- Word of Honor. Very much in the same vein as The Untamed. Except that the first episode is less horrible. And the one dude has a very fruity fan. And they also raise a kid together. And the costumes of the villains are really fun!! I actually never finished this one tbh. I know that the book it is based on has one very extremely terrible ableist plot point, but I don't know if that made it into the show since I never got that far

The Devil Judge. The last two were fantasy, this one is a dystopia. Very tense and interesting. There is a romantic subplot (typical childhood friend vs bad boy love triangle), but he rejects the childhood friend and they can't exactly show him and the "bad boy" (who is actually a judge. and also kinda his sugar daddy) as explicitly romantic for the reason above. They also live in the same house and cook together and take care of a child together. Can totally recommend.

Assassination Classroom. A bunch of students have to kill their teacher who is an alien. that's literally the plot. I cried so hard at the finale. Nagisa and Karma have MASSIVE vibes and you can't convince me otherwise. (There is a romantic subplot that does end in a kiss, but they agree to continue as friends since those were..... extenuating circumstances. The dude very clearly is not into her). Nagisa also very aro-spec coded imo.

5. "Straightbaiting" Anime

Sometimes Anime does this thing (which I personally find very hilarious) where a boy and a girl will have no other romantic involvements or love interests while growing closer and closer, but never get together. A bit like reverse queerbaiting.

Examples:

- Fairy Tail. The ultimate power is friendship anime. That is all you need to know. (I should also perhaps warn you that the end of the last arc (and the sequel series, but we don't talk about that) are huge letdowns. Like the buildup? So good. But....welp. If that doesn't bother you too much and the idea to have a group of people be the main character instead of one person only, this may be the series for you. Just do yourself a favor and skip all the filler arcs

Soul Eater. I really love the vibes of this one. Once again, most of the fandom likes depicting them as explicitly romantic, but they never canonically are. It also reminds me a bit of creepy children cartoons. It is also where the superior fictional school exists, Devon. Frankenstein teaches there (the dude, not the monster). People transform into badass weapons. Nobody can convince me that Make Albarn is not a trans woman. However the ending deviates a bit from the manga, and I personally think the anime one is a bit worse

Noragami. This one will always hold a special place in my heart because it was the first anime I really watched. This one also has people who transform into weapons, but the vibes are very different. It goes a bit more into Japanese folklore in case that interests you.

Bonus: Canonically Aro/Heavily Aro-Coded Characters

They were not anywhere above because the stories they are in didn't really fit any of the categories. But they exist!

Wolf (Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts). I adore Wolf. There is also barely any romance. Like, it will seem like it at first, but don't worry, it's only straightbaiting. There is a romance subplot but it's very brief and very much in the background. Overall very good aro show 👍

Isaac (Heartstopper) Very queer show, very high likelihood that you already know of it. The series per se is very romance focused, but as far as I've heard the a-spec rep in S2 is really good

Georgia (Loveless). Actually never read it. But, well. Title pretty self-explanatory dare I say. By the same author as Heartstopper (Alice Oseman)

Chance/Chris and Shadow/Ryan (woe.begone) Are explicitly in a QPR together !! they are also probably the healthiest couple in the podcast lol

Henry Clerval (Frankenstein). Henry is the "a couple of besties!!" to Victor's "we look like a couple <3"

Barbie (Barbie 2023) If you've seen it you know what I mean.

Jo Marsh (Little Women). I never read the book, but Jo in the 2019 movie??? very sus.

I would also recommend checking out Japanese books! I personally think they are much better at writing romance than the western people lol. It's more about knowing each other and sharing your views of the world, thus changing each other and leaving a mark forever, even if the relationship ends. (studio ghibli romance vibes). My favorite Japanese book doesn't have an English translation :(

aber an alle Deutsch-Sprecher*innen: Die Katzen von Shinjuku (Durian Sukegawa) -> og title: Shinjuku no Neko

Can't think of anything else right now, but please leave some of your own recommendations! Hope this helps ^^

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sulfies · 5 months

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In your heavy bleeding au, does Desmond remember his bleeds or does he just black out during the whole process? Also, does he have certain triggers?

Love all your au stuff btw owo

Im glad my au is infecting everyones brain muhahaha

to answer, when I draw Desmond with yellow eyes and fainting like a damsel I think in my head its one fo 2 things:

1) he is having such a heavy bleed(hehe pun) his body shuts down and all he can do is to live thru the bleed basically, he would not be able to tell its a bleed even if someone told him it was one(they cant tho since he is stuck in the bleed in his head) so he just has to ride it out. It probobly disorients him quiet a bit once he gets out of it for hrs maybe in some cases days.

2) he is having visions from apple and its such heavy knowledge his human brain kinda goes overheat mode.

In the end you can determine yourself (since its an au nothing is set in stone lol) if he remembers or not but for myself:

I think on 1)

he doesnt remember all details, after he is out of the episode he probobly remembers who the bleed was about and some context but not all, but some stuff lingers for few hours sometimes days as mentioned. maybe he finds hard to switch to the language he uses the most or his emotions carry over, like if it was about altair right after he lost his ranks, he feels some petty anger towards Malik he cannot explain but he can figure out it was cocky-altair memories probobly due to context clues. They are probobly like dreams(or nightmares) in a sense where the more he tries to remember the more he forgets about details…

for 2)

He is just not that smart enough (sorry Des ur no Altaïr…)to explain what the apple showed him but he probobly does remember in a sense; if its things like a remedy, a basic invention or instructions that he can learn from a yt video normally he can muscle memory to make em. its more like “how tf did u do that” “uhhh i have no idea” withing a limit lol so he cannot invent phones bc he probobly cant even make a phone in modern day

——————

for his other heavy bleeds where he is not passed out with eyes all gold I think some of the same rules as 1) apply where he doesnt know he is in a bleed, especially if he is bleeding as someone bc at that moment he thinks he is that person, but someone could snap him out of it if they tried (usually if he is bleeding ezio and actual ezio shows up he can make Des snap out of it but its not foolproof) and afterwards he probobly remembers most of it (to his horror) bc he did actively and physically live thru it. Like w the fic where he thinks there are guards after him but its a bleed, after he learns it is he still remembers them and sees them

but again I think the fun part is u can kinda make Des suffer in anyway you want (again…sorry Des…)so no rules are set in stone, so if you dont want him to remember anything after bleeds you are free to do so and ill probobly break these guides aswell lol

————-

for triggers hmm i think anything you want could be a trigger lol but it doesnt have to be “triggered” to happen. I think like that other fic when he first time-travels and lands in Italy or Levant he would most likely have a bleed where he thinks he is someone else sooner or later bc the enviroment shocks him and confuses him (as time travel does) so something that “shocks” him can send him into an episode but he could also be totally fine in another scenerio

in my hc w the fainting ones, they are similar to seizures w how they come and go (I do not get seizures so my research is very limited) so sometimes he can guess it will happen few seconds to min before but he cannot stop them and sometimes it just gets him by suprise, for the ones where he doesnt faint he again has no idea when it will happen and most likely cannot tell it will, those ones are probobly more affected by “triggers” but they dont have to be as I said above

ty for askingg sorry to give an essay as response lol

#take a shot everytime i say bleed to experiance your very own bleed #dont #im sorry desmond lol ı swear I do love you thats why I gave you a harem of assassins #assassin's creed #asks #heavy bleed effect au

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sapphicc-ace · 3 months

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💗About me!💗

MY DM NOTIFICATIONS DONT WORK USUALLY AND ITS ANNOYING IM NOT IGNORING YOU AAAA

They/she, sapphic

Pretty self explanatory. I'm still kinds figuring out my gender identity but for now I'm a femby, feminine leaning non binary person. If you don't respect that move along. I dont at all mind being referred to femininely but a they once in a while might be nice, still figuring things out yknow? And when it comes to the next two topics, as the name implies I'm very sapphic, meaning I'm not rlly into the masc side of things. But all gendered peoples are welcome here and I'd love to be friends with anyone!! Also I have a lot of social anxiety so forgive me for being stupid fhfhrjf

Aromantic...maybe demi?

I think im aromantic. I'm not actively looking for a serious relationship, but who knows maybe thatll change one day. Just keep it in mind when you dm me im not really looking for a relationship, pls dont get your hopes up. However, I love being flirty and making people happy and flustered with complimentsand teasing😋 I'm open to queerplatonic/poly stuff and would love to be an encourager to any fem feedees, or just make new friends! So feel free to reach out as long as you respect my boundaries (and ofc I'll respect yours, be sure to tell me them so I know!!)

If I think you're cool and am comfortable with you and you live in or near new york...👀

A graysexual feedist?

Yes, asexuality is a spectrum, and in truth I think i reside more on the lines of graysexual. For some, asexuality means not being sexual whatsoever. For others, like me, you can still experience stuff like arousel, without the need for sex itself. I personally am put off by sex organs of all kinds. Sex itself is physically pleasurable, but conceptually does nothing for me. Tldr, I only get off on feedism, my love for feedism is an aesthetic fixation consciously, while my body gets horny about it.

And as the name implies I loooove soft feedism! Casually encouraging someone to overeat, praising and teasing their softness, cute shit gets me so bad. I do enjoy some more hard stuff too, but usually only if my partner is into it. I naturally lean more soft core.

Feedism topics i love:

-Button pops

-Gluttony🥴😵‍💫 🥰(especially the "helpless" style of gluttony)

-Tight clothes

-Jiggles

-Burps (in particular lil borps from being too stuffed)

-General soft feeder-feedee stuff

-Bloating

-Before/after, seeing progress, that kinda thing

-General chubby love especially from non feedist sources, call me a dork but that pureness makes me heart sing🥺

Stuff I'm neutral on (can be cute in the right scenerio):

-Pet play

-Belly noises

-Slob

-"mommy" type stuff

Things I am NOT interested in however:

-Graphic stuff about genitals/holes. Knowing youre super aroused can add to it but just...no holes pls

-Blueberry stuff

-Vore

-death feedism/health issues

-Inflation

-Abusive situations

-Any bodily fluid or substance that comes out of you lol

(BTW anythibg on here that's halfway is like neutral, like I won't be sad over a lack of it but I like it!)

Neurodivergent

ADHD, undiagnosed autistic, probably an anxiety disorder, yeah I'm kind of a mess

Other interests:

-Videogames, generally big on Nintendo stuff and play plenty of steam games. Not really into super competitive stuff, realism or most shooters, but some big names are Kirby, Smash Ult, TF2, Pokémon, Celeste, Animal Crossing, and I'm a huge fan of many roguelikes like Binding of Isaac.

-Animals: pls send me cute photos of your cat🥺

-Magic the Gathering (filthy commander player who hasn't bothered learning the meta for other formats)

-Failed artist but I love seeing other works!

-Foodie (no honestly outside of kink I'm a huge slut for good food, but I'm as picky as a 5 year old so it's a struggle lol)

-Weird horror stuff, warning I WILL tell you my analog horror theories

-Animated shows like adventure time

-stupid movies, I will quote some bad movie I havnt seen in years because it suck with me for no reason

That's pretty much everything I think is important to know about me. I'll edit later if things change. Hope you have a good day full of delicious foods! (Or full of adorable fatties if you're an fa!)💗

I am both of these btw spiritually (credit: punkitt)

youtube

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ambrosialdesire · 1 year

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Congrats on 30 followers! :) Since you’re requests are now officially open I have oneeee.

Canon verse yandere childhood best friend Eren :) Maybe reader starts dating someone and Eren won’t accept having the love of his life be taken away from him.

(I’m not really sure if this is how to write a request btw.)

boundless

18+ DARK CONTENT BELOW, MINORS + BLANK BLOGS DNI

pairing: s4 eren x fem!reader word count: 2k warnings + tags: general yandere and obsessive themes, unhealthy relationships, one-sided pining, childhood friends, kinda angsty at first ngl, implied non-con at the end, all characters are 18+ synopsis: you start dating and it's not the man that everyone had expected, the one who's been at your side since forever. love is a powerful emotion and eren has too much of it for you to ignore. a/n: thank you sm anon and this is a perfectly fine request! depending on how descriptive a request is somewhat affects the length of the fic :) btw this is pre-rumbling and pre-marley invasion (aka when eren was pretending to be a injured soldier). really bad and unreliable synopsis but hope this is a good read!! double posting today haha (mostly because i haven't posted in a bit lol) note: please keep in mind of the tags above and do not proceed if triggering or uncomfortable, especially if you are a minor!! do not read my or any other writers' dark content if you are underaged. this is a fictional work and does not reflect irl morals, do not believe this is how a real romance works or functions.

The sounds of cutlery hitting the plates and the wooden table caused your cheeks to flush more, a hand rubbing at your nape as you began to avert your gaze from the group. Wide eyes were staring at you, as if you said something that was a complete shocker. God, this had to be worse than actually fighting Titans.

"You're what!?" Sasha was the one that finally broke the silence, hands slamming on the table as she got up from her seat abruptly.

"And to who?!" Connie followed suit, slamming his hands down but instead hitting his dinner, gravy sauce going everywhere. His face cringed at the mess but he still stared at you with seeming horror.

"Guys, it's not that serious."

"Bullshit, it's not serious! You're dating—"

"—And it's not Eren?!"

Your body tensed up immediately, realizing that he was the only one that barely reacted to your confession, still focused on his dinner as his now long brown hair marred the side of his face. A part of you felt nervous not being able to really know what he was thinking, the other part of you felt worried. Jean slapped the back of both Sasha and Connie's heads, a scowl on his face.

"Knock it off you two! Of course she wouldn't date him, we're talking about Eren for God's sake."

They started bickering with each other and you tried to resolve it as always, but every single sound and word started to muddle together like his head was pushed underwater. His fist clenched around his spoon, to the point where he could feel the metal bend to the shape of his hand. You didn’t pick him. He wasn't as nearly surprised as the others, mostly because he had already seen it coming, but witnessing it come true was a pain that was utterly indescribable.

Out of everyone, they had to be some random civilian that caught your eye. Someone who doesn’t know the true horrors of the world out there, someone who never struggled the same way you and he did growing up. Maybe he'd be fine if you ended up with Armin or fuck, even Jean was a viable option but no. You went off and found yourself some guy who didn't come close to understanding you.

It didn't make sense, Eren's been with you since the two of you could walk. He was the one that saved you over and over again by those bullies that taunted you and Armin, never minding the fact that Mikasa had to save everyone at the end of it. He was your shoulder to cry on, especially after everything that happened back when everyone was still young scouts. He was the one who sacrificed everything for you. Everyone in the squadron knew that the two of you were inseparable, like two peas in a pod. No wonder everyone was surprised that you guys didn't end up together but the Paths denied him the end he sought out for years, even if he had only seen the flashing glimpses of the inescapable future.

"Er— Ere... Eren. Hey Eren!" You snapped your fingers in front of his face, his gaze latching onto yours immediately. You always had such a kind look in your eyes, he's glad that it never went away despite what you've gone through.

"Your spoon." He looked down and saw that he completely severed the metal utensil in half, the indentations of his fingers prominent in the silver handle. The others were looking at him, puzzled and confused expressions on their faces. He knew what they were thinking. Why didn't you take a chance?

There was no chance to begin with. Eren was on the losing side of the game no matter what.

"Must've forgot how to hold a spoon. Remember what happened the last time I held one like this?" He mused, placing the broken halves down on the table. The more they quietly stared at him, the more he wanted to run out of the room with his shattered heart pieces. He dismissed himself out of the mess hall, saying that he was exhausted. They knew that he wasn't but none of them mustered a word of any sorrowful condolences, his frame disappearing into the shadows of the hallway.

The pitter-patter of running came up from behind him and he felt the brush of a hand against his, heart pumping back to life as he recognized the familiar texture of your skin. Eren looked beside him and saw you, smiling at him like you had no clue what was running through his mind. Breathlessly, you asked him a simple question.

"Rooftop?"

He nodded, letting you lead the way for him. Rooftop meant that you wanted to talk in the spot that you found for each other back when you two started in the Survey Corps, a flat area at the top of the building where the night sky was all that you could see. The rules were that you weren't allowed to bring anyone else up there besides each other and that you weren't allowed to go there without one another. Eren wouldn't admit it but he did sneak there every once in a while, basking in the memory of you and him being young and slightly naïve.

"You're upset." You finally stated as you settled yourself down on the floor, an old blanket covering the rough ground.

"I'm not."

"I know you are, you get all awkward about it instead of bursting out your feelings." He grimaced, was he really that predictable as a kid? Eren leaned himself back on the edge of the roof barrier, staring up at the sky.

"Are you... happy that I'm dating someone?" He could hear the hesitancy in your question, curiosity and fear intermingling. His hands clenched against the concrete, the texture scraping his skin. If he knew that this is what you wanted to talk about, he would've avoided you like the plague.

He took a slow inhale.

"What do you want to hear, the honest truth or an honest lie?" Eren heard you stand up and walk closer to him, cautious hands grabbing his and pulling him towards you.

"The truth."

You've always looked so pretty under the night sky, the way your eyes reflected the stars and the way the moon shone down on your form. He never told you because he was so scared of ruining what the two of you have. This was nothing like what he felt towards Mikasa or Armin. You were special, you were his. Now that he knew what lies beyond the future, he should've said something before. Would that have changed anything now?

"The truth is, I'm not happy. There's nothing you can say that will change my stance about it." You frowned and squeezed his hands before letting go of him, your warmth escaping him.

"Eren, you can't keep disapproving every man I'm interested in."

"Yes I can and I will. You've always had terrible taste, remember how you liked Bertolt back in training?" You gasped in horror, hitting his arm.

"Stop! I never want that to ever be brought up again and I only liked him because he helped me out that one time with the chores," There was a flush on your cheeks, embarrassed about how you once was ever interested in a traitor. "But I'm serious this time, this relationship is serious."

In all of his years of knowing you, serious was never a word that fit you. Eren rolled his eyes, crossing his arms and leaning towards you.

"How long?"

"How long, what?"

"How long have you been seeing this guy?"

You started fidgeting your hands, your tell-tale sign that it's been a while and you're figuring out how to lie about it. You could never lie to him though, he'd always figure you out.

You finally sighed and relented, giving up on trying to say anything but the truth. "2 years."

"Fuck, so it was right under all of our noses huh?" His hand gripped against his sleeve, his voice almost shaking as he spoke. He thought that you trusted him with everything, whatever you tell him would be confidential. He would never snitch on you, he thought you knew that. Eren had to turn away from you because if he didn't, you would've witnessed the tears roll down his cheeks. He felt your hand against his back, slowly rubbing circles on his back.

He hated you. He hated the way you made him feel like a pile of mush. He hated how you pretended not to know that he loved you, not as the childhood friend but as the man who pined after you the minute he was able to comprehend what he was feeling towards you.

He hated your smile, that annoyingly beaming grin directed at him whenever and for whatever reason.

He hated your affection, how you pretended to truly care about him when you were off loving another man.

He hated your warmth, radiating like an everlasting sun and cheering everyone up as if you were a carbon copy of Historia.

With all the love he had for you, there was the same amount of hatred that came along with it.

Eren looked at you, turning his body towards yours and you looked at him. As if he was under a spell, he felt himself mouthing the words that he longed to tell you for years. Your reaction was unexpected, perhaps even completely expected. His cheek stung from your strike, your eyes big and wide as if a Titan just walked up in front of you.

"Eren, y-you don't mean that do you?" His hand rested on his cheek, his fingers digging into his skin.

"I meant every word," He uttered softly, suddenly grabbing your hands and pulling them close to his chest. "Do you feel it? I love you. I'll love you until my bones are nothing but dust, I'll love you until my lungs stop taking in air, I'll love you until the world falls apart. Please Y/N, I'm already forever yours. Will you be mine?"

There was only silence that came from you after his confession, the pounding reverb of his heart being the only thing he could hear. You pushed him away, a stunned and confused look reflecting in your moonlit eyes. He felt wounded, like you stabbed a blade even deeper into his chest.

"N-No, no. Eren, I'm already dating someone. You can't just say all of this now." Your hands gripped your uniform pants tightly, the fabric scrunching together. "You're too late."

He shakily sighed, pushing his hair out of his face. What he hated most about you was your ability to constantly deny anything that you didn't want to hear.

"I thought you might say that."

He was instantaneous, quick. You never reached the level of ability of being fast on your feet in sparring and you wouldn't ever beat him in it now. He pinned you down onto the old blanket, his hand gripping both of your wrists tightly together above your head as he rested himself in-between your legs. You fought back but he didn't budge, only pressing you harder into the ground. His other hand made quick work in removing your pants and undergarments, shoving your panties in your mouth to keep you silent. No one needs to know about the rooftop after all.

Eren's selfish, you've always known that he was. You just didn't know how deep it went, how his selfishness of what he had deemed was love for you dug in and rotted into his heart. You tried begging through the cloth, muffled and incoherent cries being the only thing that was heard. He clicked his tongue, dragging his thumb across your spit-slicked lips before giving you a light kiss on the side of your face.

"If I can't change your mind with words," Eren pulled back and drank in your partially nude body, admiring you as he watched tears form at the corners of your eyes. He placed his free hand over your mound, fingers barely inserting themselves into your folds, your body reactively shivering from his touch. "I'll fuck you over and over until you can think about nothing but me."

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scaly-freaks · 3 months

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The gothic lighthouse and the storm so no one can hear Amara scream...I got shivers. how dark does this one get or do they learn to live with one another?

Before I go on...I'm making Aegon look like this because...reasons

And to answer your question....hmm unless they both wanna die, they'd probably learn to survive. Maybe it was some specific curse or moment in time where if she emerged from the ocean at that exact second, her tail would be replaced by legs and she wouldn't get it back for three years.

Aegon sees the transformation and immediately throws out the net to catch her (because even if a mermaid doesn't have her tail, that's still a mermaid, he can sell her for parts or to a freak show). I think I'm setting this in 19th century England by the way, because I want to see my baby girl dressed in those ruffly dresses with her hair all loose Crimson-Peak style. And plus Aegon would look hot in a long leather coat, flat cap and boots.

I think he probably uses a cattle prod to keep her in check, and keeps her on a chain until she learns not to rip him open (she can still grow siren claws and her teeth are very sharp). Btw, I'm calling it a cattle prod but it wouldn't have been invented in the 19th century so it's just a hot iron poker. He figures out pretty quickly she heals abnormally fast, so it's never lasting damage. The healing bit is also invaluable because Victorian doctors esp in gothic horror fiction are always weird so one of them would pay Aegon good money for her.

She's been naked all her life, and has no concept of clothes, so when he tries to dress her the first time, he almost loses his eyeballs, and therefore for a good month, she's just there in the lighthouse naked and refusing to complain about how cold it gets. Aegon takes pity on her and tries to put his coat around her once or twice, but again, she tries to kill him and he has to use the prod again so...

But after a month she'd probably give into wearing clothes. Her new body just isn't used to the temperatures like this.

Them being isolated and him already being half-mad thanks to the solitary nature of his job, and her not being human, I don't imagine they'd communicate in a civilised way. He can get downright cruel when she's being nasty, and he throws scraps of food for her to crawl to and eat off the floor. If she lunges at him when his guard is down, cattle prod.

Time wears on and he realises he doesn't want to sell her to a doctor or a freakshow (he kinda likes having her around)

#fisherman aegon #mermaid amara #asks #aegon x amara #scalyfreaksarts

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jamisonwritestf2trash · 10 months

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Please rant about it!!

Ok!

But also, I'm linking the videos just incase people stumble across this and want to watch the videos after seeing this:

HBomberguy's Video

Todd in the Shadows video

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I'm starting out with some of my favorite parts before a mini rant bc, yeah! (This is nowhere near all of my favorite parts, but there's just so much it'd take me hours to compile.

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Immediately starting with a Harlan Ellison moment was amazing

The "world's most fuckable twink" line absolutely took me out, but then him going into the explanation about plagiarism being disrespectful right after was like two back to back gut punches, in the best way. Because he was so fucking right about it.

The grammar mistakes he points out are so funny

Him overlaying Brian Deer's documentary over Blair's video was also great.

Him calling Blair out for being lazy and honestly a shitty person was also great.

ALSO! BLAIR CITING HER SOURSE AND IT BEING A PIRACY WEBCITE!?

Also also him making fun of how her sprite moves 😭

Him calling out Internet Historian for being a piece of shit

German board game joke

How he points out Reilly's skill and talent

"Just don't touch the screen or move the mouse awa..."

"MASTER OF SHIT!" (rips the wall down)

"There's one group more important than historians, or journalists, or anyone else with a real job, and that's gay people."

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Rant time :)

My mini rant is just about how fucking stomach churning the second half is. Like, let me tell you, I watched that entire section, mouth agape, in shock and horror. I can bearly fathom how lazy, pathetic, and malicious you'd have to be to pull some of the shit he (Somerton) did. (The first half stuff was insanely bad too don't get me wrong)

Hbomberguy did an amazing job showing the visual of how many parts of the queer horror video were plagiarized, I legitimately gasped when the highlighted portions were shown.

Every time you think he can't get any lower, he does. It's baffling, and honestly, I wish I could say more about how mad this makes me, but I'm so mad and tired that I can't think of words so mini rant over, I suppose.

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But also, sorry, this is one thing I feel like no one is mentioning, and it's driving me insane. I also watched Todd in the Shadows video (which is also really good btw) and at least three parts of the video debunk lies Somerton said about nazis, the main ones being, (and I'm taking the titles from the yt video so you can find these in the time stamps)

1. The SS was "teeming with homosexuals"

2. The hitler youth was also run by homosexuals

3. The nazis created our current body standards.

In the three mentioned above, Somerton's lies are genuinely just him writing gay fan fic about nazi Germany (at least that's how I felt about what he was speaking and wording things) and it's fucking disgusting. He says things in such a skin crawling way it makes me sick.

And no one seems to be talking about it or how fucking weird it is, but hey, maybe I'm reading too much into it.

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed my mini rant and my favorite parts. Sorry it's all kinda messy.

#sorry its not too much of a rant </3 #also sorry if parts dont make sence im so tired #james somerton #hbomberguy #also #ive watched it so many times #at least 3 #because its so good #if you havent seen it please watch it!

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kenphobia · 1 year

Text

GUERTENA'S IMAGE!

"We could make such a pretty picture."

summary. you're the newest addition to the neighborhood and only until now, you realized there was another neighbor before you! good thing wally's there to introduce you to them, right? ( 1.2k wc / drabble / read end notes )

contents. unreality, paranoia, implied body horror, kinda dark!wally. written in 2nd pov but still gn!reader, (name) and reader are two different people here btw, not proofread. ( read at your own risk )

It's a somber afternoon, quiet and peaceful. The morning rain had stopped a few minutes ago and the refreshing smell of petrichor oozes from the sidewalks.

You're a fresh face in the neighborhood, moving in just a couple of months ago and instantly clicking with a few of the residents. And speaking of the residents, you loitered around Wally's arm room, admiring the artworks hanging from the wall as he played around with his paints behind you, engrossed with the watercolour set you gifted him.

Though, the room was as still and silent as the apple Wally's using as a reference, there's a certain comfortable feeling that lofts around and makes it fine for you to look at the paintings. As you walked around, humming a soft tune, you encounter a painting of an unfamiliar puppet smiling and posing like the Mona Lisa.

Their eyes seemed to gleam with a gentle mirth and their body language was relaxed and calm. A painting like this wouldn't have caught your attention if it wasn't leaning against the wall, nearly tucked into the corner with a black blanket covering half of it.

Out of curiosity, you turned to Wally. "Wally?"

The painter hummed in acknowledgment, never taking his eyes off the canvas. "What is it, neighbor?"

"Who's this person? Are they your friend?" You asked casually, shifting the blanket to see the covered side more clearly. At your words, the room seemed to stop moving for a while.

"Ah, yes. That's (Name). They're my friend." You jumped and turned around, immediately meeting Wally's gaze as he stood before you. Wasn't he just sitting a while ago? And just how soft is his footsteps for him to sneak up on you like that?

You nodded at his answer, somewhat satisfied. Though, you can't help but feel a sudden somber weight being casted on the room. You look at Wally's eyes and see a glint of sadness, of grief and guilt in those dark eyes of his.

During your stay in your neighborhood, you never seen Wally make such an expression. Maybe once on a rainy day like this, but this time, it enticed your curiosity.

Wally and you aren't exactly close friends, but close enough to let you into his most private room, his safe room as he liked to call it. And as much as you want to hold yourself back for his comfort, the question left your lips before you could even think about it.

"What happened to them?"

Wally stilled, taking in a breath before crouching down and removing the cover. There you can see the full beauty of the painting; the full beauty of the muse. Wally brushed and glided his thumb over the colorful canvas, feeling the gruff texture of paint sticking to cotton surface.

The two of you sat in silence, admiring the painting in Wally's hands before he finally turned to you and smiled. "I forgot to give this to them. Would you like to help me, neighbor?"

You nod slowly at first, but surely regain a bit of energy and smile back. "Of course. What kind of neighbor am I if I don't help you?" You laughed, shaking off the feeling of worry settling hard in your chest.

And so, the two of you set off outside, umbrella in hand. Though the rain was lighter than it had been when it first poured, it still drizzles ever so slightly. Neither Wally or you wanted to deliver a portrait looking like a soaking wet mess.

As you walked down the streets, you couldn't help but feel a slight dread bubbling from the pits of your stomach. You've met everyone in the neighborhood now, you even became bestest friends with some of them, but you never met this ... (Name).

Were they a recluse? Had they withdrawn too much from society that they refuse to interact with anyone anymore? You weren't sure. But whatever the reason was, you're somewhat glad that Wally was friends with them. Still, it worries you.

The two of you come closer and closer to an old house settled peacefully on a small hill. It looked smiliar to the rest of the neighborhood houses, but the colors were dull and the years had weathered the entire house down. You'd be lying if you said this place didn't give you the creeps.

Has this house always been here? You swear that you never seen this house from your first tour aorund the place. You'd chalk this up as simply not noticing it the first time, but surely this kind of thing would catch your attention instantly.

"Is this where your friend lives?" You asked Wally, turning to him as you two took shelter under the porch.

Wally nodded, humming in acknowledgement. He didn't say anything, only opening the door with a sliver key you didn't know he had. The doors open with a boring creak and when you stepped in, the floorboards groaned under your sudden weight.

The entire place has a thin blanket of dust covering it, from the furniture to the counters, and the plants looked like they haven't tasted a single drop of water in weeks.

"This place sure needs some cleaning up." You mumbled to yourself, carefully treading down the halls as Wally follow suit, holding the painting in hand.

"It really does." Wally muttered quietly.

Silence followed soon after, traversing alongside the two of you until you finally come across a door at the end of a hallway. It was painted in (color) with various little drawings at each side, almost acting like a border. But what was more interesting was the nameplate nailed on it.

"(Name)'s room..." You read aloud, whispering under your breath with furrowed brows. "Are we... Are we going inside?"

Wally hummed as if he was in deep thought before nodding. "Yep. Let's give them the painting right away."

You stepped aside, allowing Wally to open the door. A breeze wrapped your body in its embrace for a short while, slithering up your sleeves before disappearing and becoming a part of the cold. Dust particles flies around you as you force yourself to hold in a sneeze and close your eyes, feeling said particles land on some parts of your face.

You coughed, waving your hands in front of you. Wally already went inside before you, so you had no choice but to follow in his step. When you open your eyes and take in your surroundings, the first thing you notice was a large portrait of (Name) wearing a smile brighter than what you first saw in Wally's painting.

The entire room was fully furnished and clean, free of any dust and cobwebs. The bed was pristine and haven't been touched or slept in for a long time, the floors were swept and there were boxes stacked atop each other in a dark corner.

You didn't even realized it was nighttime until you saw strips of moonlight passing through the custom windows, setting the room alight in the night's cool glory. And even still, that heaviness was still uncomfortably on your chest.

"Where's... Where are they, Wally? I don't see them here." You tried to laugh, pass off your nervousness as a chuckle but it came out as strained and terrified. And you are terrified.

Wally turned his head, his expression the same as always—smiling yet wide-eyed. And inside of this eyes held nothing but an endless abyss, all of the sorrow and grief earlier had been lost and discarded like the painting that once was in his hold. He gestured towards the intricate painting, illuminated eerily by the smooth moonlight.

"What do you mean? They're right here."

That was when you realized that the portrait wasn't painted but rather had fleece and hair sewed onto the cotton canvas.

notes. omg 2 posts in a day??? shocking i know. this was actually written back in may before i completely forgot abt finishing this and since i have a few writer juice left, i decided to fix up another wally fic before disappearing from the face of tumblr again

tbh this was supposed to be an angsty fic where wally mourns the death of his friend and couldn't move on because he loves them too much to let them go buuuut i got ahead of myself 😋 so ... deal with it. this was also a bit experimental and im trying to get into more dark writing (ofc body horror, psychological horror and all that. not too far yk??) and setting a better atmosphere, so any feedback would be great!

again, requests are open and any kind of support (i.e likes, reblogs, comments) is appreciated! but also pls dont just like bcus it doesn't give my works a boost so pls reblog and/or comment as well!! it doesn't have to bs anything professional or criticism, this is tumblr!! not goodreads

#writing log!#wally darling x reader #welcome home #welcome home x reader

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kiwibongos · 6 months

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i dont really infodump in general at all but im doing it cus i need some ideas off my chest. do you freak with angst? perhaps an unhappy ending?

// sdr2 chapter 5+ending spoilers ig. also kuzuhina au baybee

so i had an idea of like. what if nagito DID actually bomb the island, taking everyone out alongside himself?

so when nagito finds out that he alongside all the other participants (aside from chiaki) are remnants of despair he just wants to end everything for good bc he doesnt think the ones he called "symbols of hope" deserved to live. so bombs are spread all around the islands forreal this time, and hes still just as vague and ominous, never really specified how many bombs there were, what island it was on, and left it up to the survivors to try and figure it out. so they'd all been searching for days, but to no avail, and at the very last moment when fuyuhiko finds them at the military base (nagito had just freshly died + placed them on the truck), he drags the others there to check it out. once nagito's video message to them ends, the bombs go off alongside a chain of other explosions across every island. the remaining survivors ran out of the factory, barely on time, and everything started crumbling around them, and all the others were downed one by one, crushed underneath falling structures with no time to be saved

but somehow haj and fuyu survived (who were farther away and had more time to react), the others dying right in front of their own eyes. but they ran away, retreating to the warehouse immediately. and hajime just takes a minute to crumble in fuyuhikos arms wishing he couldve saved them. until they hear music echoing in the warehouse. they walk down, and past a curtain, they find nagitos body with a spear through his head. (the fire/poison didnt go off btw, it wasnt really necessary in his plan.)

im sure u can imagine hajime was fucking raging at that point just breaking down and stressing out, how mad he was at nagito for running away like this and inflicting all this pain onto everyone, and monokuma let him do it since yknow, technically he couldnt punish him for a crime he hadnt committed yet, and all this happened in a matter of minutes. but fuyuhiko snaps him out of his panic for a second and knocks something through hajimes head, and the realization hits; it’s just them now. they’re the only ones left

and neither of them know what to do

but their first thought was to get out of this factory as fast as possible, so thats the first thing they do, navigating through the fire and leaving the entire fifth island, and hope that maybe they can find a way out of here, or ask monokuma or monomi for help (since the island is in shambles, they must have to let them go right?), so they wander around, hoping maybe then something would happen, but there wasn't any sight of monokuma or monomi. the fire kept on spreading, the smoke was getting worse, so fuyuhiko and hajime eventually retreat back at the military base (one of the few places untouched by the bombs) so they could catch their breath, collect their thoughts, and make a plan (or hopefully monokuma would come to them, if they stay in one place.)

they just kinda sit inside of a garage for a while, talk a little and comfort eachother through it, hajime is crushed by guilt and horror, but he realizes they wont accomplish anything just by sitting here. and if he couldnt save the others, he can save him and fuyuhiko. so haj leaves fuyuhiko in the garage with determination to think of something to get them off this island somehow. he looks for ways of escape, like the helicopter outside, but no fuel. he looks for materials or tools for a boat, but the island had been extremely lacking in that, everything was either burned or missing by now, so even their most plausible idea was destroyed. when hajime returns to the garage in a panic, pacing around, fuyuhiko realizes they arent getting off this island. they cant wait here forever. but hes known this for a while, and he knows what he has to do now

eventually, he hands hajime a pistol(acquired from the truck of firearms outside), and asks him to kill him so it could finally be over

obviously hajime refuses at first, but fuyuhiko begs him, because he isn’t a good person and he doesn’t have much else to live for, while hajime has singlehandedly saved everyones asses, he deserved to escape more than anyone else here, he basically tells him 'its time you take care of yourself.' by now, hajime was crying, but they’ve been at this dead end for so long, he knew he had to do it or else they’d never be getting off this island. so hajime just had to accept it, so he just holds him close, says his final goodbyes before making it quick for him

pulling that trigger hurt him more than anything, knowing he'd failed to the end, but anyway boom monokuma comes out congratulating him, ends the simulation, and hajime is the winner

also postgame babey; when things end here, hajime would wake up from the simulation, and since he never got to choose his own future alongside everyone else, he wakes up as izuru kamukura, inside the abandoned pod room. he's not entirely empty i think, izuru and hajime still would have "merged" afterwards, but his memories of the simulation are very fuzzy very quickly, so hajime is somewhere in there, mourning, justi n the deepest parts of his mind. but thats a whole thing to get into. the survivors, fuyuhiko, and everything that happened, are just kind of like a vague nightmare that sticks with you no matter how much you try to forget it

but he just leaves the pod room, and lurks around the city without any other purpose to serve anymore, all alone. the future foundation hasnt found him since

edit: side note i was really back and forth on it for a while but i finally wrote this into a fic lol. the brainrot consumes

#rambling #kuzuhina #fuyuhiko kuzuryu #fuyuhiko kuzuryuu #hajime hinata #anyway ill just let this collect dust here #im a one braincelled organism without a name #danganronpa #super danganronpa 2 #sdr2

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