#this is so insane how am i supposed to feel normal about them bro

[dericelem]

do you ever think about lewis hearing emma say "im officially curious, what did you wanna show me?" to rikki in pool party episode and he still assumed they are both naked? i do. are they gay

[heavenlyraindrops]

smut writing tips (TW: sexual stuff cause like. Cmon. It’s smut)

I did one for character so now I’m doing one for smut what’s wrong with smut huh so what if I’m writing tips on how to make smut so what SO WHAT HUH

Smut scenes aren’t that different from normal scenes. Probably because they’re normal scenes. Remember that.

Therefore, they should have dialogueeee because boy oh boy the amount of smut I have read where they are just dead silent is insane I could rebuild the wall of china with allat

so… dirty talk

BUT DONT MAKE IT TOO LONG! OR TOO WEIRD…

“Do you think they’d watch?” he asks. “Do you think they’d enjoy the sight of your naked flesh on display? Maybe they would get off on seeing your dripping pussy reflected back at them everywhere they look. Or the pretty flush on your chest when you come. I think they’d even enjoy watching your eyes roll to the back of your head when my cock fills you so fully, you can’t fit any more of me inside you.”

That’s from haunting Adeline… and… just.. no. NONONONO ITS DISGUSTING ITS GROSS…. WHO TF SAYS THAT BRO. Why is tHIS BOOK SO POPuLAR

more gross examples: “You want to know what I’d do?” he questions. “I would let them watch. I would let them watch me claim you as mine and own every inch of your body. They would watch my cock fill every one of your holes and then watch you cry because of how hard you came. And then I’d fucking kill them. My cock would still be wet from your cum as I’d slice their throats for even daring to look at what’s mine.”

dont write like that guys… like ew. Just ew

also.. epithets.. ok idk what they’re called because English = not my first language but

like

”his member” “sword” “love button” “seed” “her peaks/ nubs”

look my dude if you can read a smut scene like “he inserted his sword inside her cavern and spewed his seed inside her while fondling her mounds” then sure pop off I guess but tbh

no.

JUST USE COCK DICK AND PUSSY OR SOMETHING IDK WHY U GOTTA DO THIS TO ME I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO SEE CERTAIN THINGS THE SAME WAY EVER AGAIN

“his member” I’m sorry is his dick joining a club?

anywaysysystst

research human body stuff. Like, dicks need to recharge before they get hard again yk

“Recharge” idk bro yk what I mean

cumming more than once for women do be kinda painful unless there’s an amount of time in between the orgasms

like depends on the woman, can range from a couple of hours to at least a whole day

although this doesn’t apply to everyone and some people do just go for it a bunch of times in one session so it’s a very variable thing

so yeah! Make sure to educate urself on biology

spemd more time talking about how they feel physically and emotionally than what they are doing so that the scene actually does have some depth

consistency! I have read shit that goes along the lines of “he grabbed her waist then with his other hand stroked her cheek and then she wrapped her legs around his feet and he pressed his elbow againts her knee flipping her upside down while she nibbled on his ear” how am I supposed to imagine any of that

they keep sprouting a third arm

or do things that completely contradict the position that they are in.. he can’t slap ur ass if ur in the cowgirl position..well, not very comfortably

so. Consistency! :)

that’s all for now ermmmm so yah tell me if this was helpful guys

edit: this post is super old pls ignore its existence

[katyspersonal]

*voice of a guy who fails to be on hiatus even if he needs one* Hey, actually recently a topic of difficulty in Soulsborne games came up for me o: And I even had the pleasure of disagreeing with a person who was mature about their point of view! I just thought I'd make my own post, and for starters I want to link a video that lines up with my opinion on the matter very well too!

Despite what it might look like, I do not dwell on this guy's channel, but exclusively see his videos on Fromsoft's games x)

But personally, I agree with the notion that character's difficulty IS part of their lore too! That epiphany mostly came when I took over 70 attempts to defeat Malenia, who, I remind, "has never known defeat", so her being so hard at her lowest as she is falling apart was... very telling. There is a difference between just hearing the person is strong and feeling it yourself when they beat your ass, and I think this experience is a good thing to have!

There is also a selfish and possibly petty reason I have that is better described as "gatekeeping the normies". From my experience, most people who are upset at how hard these games are not genuinely invested fans that just don't vibe with having to die 600 times to learn more interesting lore but casual people who want to, as they call it, "consume currently popular media" to be able to create "relevant content" 🤦‍♂️ Wanting to be in the loop is just not what genuine investment and caring is about.

Miyazaki stated they were not adding difficulty levels because they wanted to present the challenge everyone would overcome in the style that fit them individually as a player! It feels like he is an indie dev without being an indie dev for me; caring not about attracting more players, but about giving experience he WANTS to give! Personally, it is exactly what I want from any creator - to be unapologetically themselves rather than trying to be convenient for more people! Some games are just not for everyone, and it is okay! Thing for everyone is a thing for no one, in the long run. Heck, I am so horrible at playing From's games that even my friends would laugh at me if they saw me streaming :/ What fits me as a player is to show resolve grinding stats (I listen to podcasts meanwhile xD), or coming up with absolutely insane strategies no normal person would come up with fshfhsd

At the same time, there is a large community of gamer dudes who not only defends absence of easy mode in these games more than I do, but also insist on creating artificial difficulty and will mock a fellow gamer for like using Mimic Tear or Comet Azur ffs. I do not go there, but people who built their self-worth on overcoming this challenge and thus feel personally attacked if someone plays the game with "imbalanced" weapons/builds, or, heck, creates and uses photo and deaggro mods. You can probably see from my posts that for me this sort of people is nearly like just a scary legend, when for others it is the reality they delve into and that ruins THEIR fandom experience.. so I suppose I don't miss much not touching Reddit and Youtube in 99% of the time 🤦‍♂️ But I think that gamer bros would ALWAYS find a way to be toxic. Had Fromsoft's games HAD an easy mode, they'd still play them and find another stupid way to gatekeep, difficulty is just currently available tool for it! As usual I think the problem is not on the developer, but on the community that twists what this developer did into something awful

I guess my stance basically goes 'creators should not change their philosophy because that's what creating should be, but the community that thrives on artificial difficulty and "correct" ways to play is bad and should be discouraged from this behaviour'

[pansexual-lilychen]

cuz it says to make it sexy: I am also a huuuuge Grace Blackthorn defender (so huge I like her better than James). I was confused when people didn't like her???? like??????? You wanted a problematic girlie then you hate on her? why bro, all she did was gaslight gatekeep girlboss (and manipulate under manipulation) for the only affection she had ever known in her life. sorry yall cant handle a powerful morally grey queen who takes her life into her own hands and does whats best for her and the toxic people she is manipulated to love.

might just be me but I was not a fan of how the series ended. 3rd book kinda disappointed me and (if I may be so bold) I felt like though James was supposed to be the good guy, I felt more comfortable with Grace's actions and emotions than his (is this weird? am I insane? anyway)

also MATTHEW FAIRCHILD, MY PROBLEMATIC BICON. WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE HIM UNRESOLVED AND STUCK IN A LOVE TRIANGLE BROOOOO. Honestly one of the worst decisions ever made for such a fabulous character. I feel like cassie should've carried out the whole "idolizing lucie due to childhood infatuation and because he thought that the herondales were perfect and he was their protector" etc etc and created a sort of one sided love for lucie that everyone helps him thru so he can fall in love with some other hot person!!!! why cordeliaaaaa (i have nothing against her, i just wanted them to be best friends, not fall in love and shit)

anyway

can i just say - i looooveee talking to another grace stan, and i agree with a lot of what you said, especially the thing about matthew! i am not a fan of love triangles but if there must be one in tlh it should have been between lucie, matthew and jesse!

(can you imagine the angst, the tension, choosing your known & safe but rebellious childhood crush vs the mysterious dead guy you’d literally have to bring back from the dead?? my god)

however our opinions do differ in some aspects: to me, this is not a Grace vs James situation AT ALL it is a Grace & James vs Tatiana situation. pitting the two against each other is such an unproductive and wrong conversation, they are two sides of the same coin.

also i don’t normally use the term morally grey, simply because i feel like there are many differing opinions and definitions of what a morally grey character is, simply because everyone’s idea of moral differs so much. i think to me Grace is a good person who is forced to do bad things, which arguably is “morally grey” but tbh there are a few people on tumblr who lack critical literary thinking skills and don’t even agree that Grace is not evil can you believe it? i also don’t love this girlboss yassification of grace like she had any control over the situation rather than calling it what it was: she was a victim trying to escape a situation without letting any harm befall jesse

[ibusukiss]

Boueibu Rewatch

Thursday's for the Boys! 11

Happy Kiss! Episodes 4-6

Episode 4

If ep 2 established HK as my favorite season, ep 4 was the cherry on top

i wonder if gora gave nanao the OK to bring a floating tray and tea into the onsen

idk if its a writing thing or a culture thing or what but i feel like i can understand all the monsters' problems in HK, but in s1 and s2 some of them feel completely abstract

UGHHH the plot point of Ichiro worrying abt the time capsule and knowing that nanao would read his letter is so *chef's kiss* they build up to it so well!!!!!!!!!! AAAGHH I LOVE PLOT

ichiro "no youthful passion" bro your character song is called Dash Dash Dash so idk what ur talking about

the funny thing about this season is it only hints at the seitokai being rich, and here it only says that Taiju's family owns a construction company, which isnt the megacorp richboy son vibes i get from s1 seitokai - i always assumed caerula adamas were MUCH richer than edelstein but only bc they made their wealth more explicit in s1? I think by making it implied in this season they made the seitokai's families seem more like blue collar ceo's rather than megacorp ceo's

i will ALWAYS headcanon that Taishi cleaned up his act bc he was trying to act more like Nanao so Ichiro would like him

THIS is what I'm talking about - by trying to write fanservice they have fully surpassed the queerbait IMO and fully just wrote that Ichiro has a crush on Nanao

i assume Kyochan wasnt trying to be sus when he tucked the photo into his pocket but this moment the first time i watched it was very 'HOLY FUCK THEYRE KEEPING SECRETS FROM EACHOTHER OHH THE INTRIGUE OHHH MY GOD" which i suppose is something the seitokai do in this season later!

I just remember when this was coming out feeling so much unbridled joy from how cheesy this season is - it gave me so much serotonin LMAO

Ata as a little kid with his black bob makes me insane - wym he had a slutty black bob as an elementary schooler??????

Serenity you already said this but I must reiterate that it is WILD that Kyoata have eachother's contact info and seem to text often enough that its not strange for Kyotaro to text Ata out of the blue - they deffo arent nearly as estranged as Kinatsu were

Episode 5 (CW: discussion of eating disorders and weight stigma)

We have now entered what I think of as the 4-episode lull of HK where the episodes dont hit as hard - not bad in any sense but theyre just not as iconic as 1-4 or 9-12

*midori gets up on their soapbox*

I have a lot of thoughts about Maasa. I dont normally have such a strong headcanon for a character - but their whole arc feel so strongly to me like the story of a trans person who has a lot of complicated feelings about their body. While that's CLEARLY not what the writers intended it is how I choose to interpret their character bc 1. i have to put my dirty trans hands on everything and 2. to me - Maasa's story is uncomfortable and poorly written otherwise

some context: I have a lot of Complicated Feelings about weight stigma/body image and spend FARRR too much time learning about the science of dieting and eating disorders, so naturally I am gonna take this episode WAY more seriously than intended - youve been warned LOL

While my bar for anime is extremely low, I am pleasantly surprised at how this ep handles talking about weight with the exception of Maasa's diet. It has always looked explicitly like disordered eating - full restriction of fats/sugars is Very extreme and dangerous, and completely goes against the 'as long as you're healthy' sentiment the episode promotes - I take issue with that mindset anyway bc 1. why should only 'healthy' people have bodies that are excused from criticism/ridicule and 2. who gets to decide what 'healthy' looks like? does healthy imply thinness? to some people, yes! But regardless, extremely restrictive diets aren't 'healthy' anyway, so no dice there, HK.

And Ata is right! People do resent those who represent the opposite of their greatest fears! The implication here being that most people's greatest fear is being fat - and therefore bully the guy who will absolutely never be fat. While I dont think anyone should bully anyone about their body, this messaging makes fatness out to be the enemy in a way that I'm not in love with :/ This ep doesn't address the relentless, institutionally-ordained negative messaging that people receive about fat bodies, which definitely fuels the need on a personal level to bite back at those who those messages dont apply to - not an excuse of course, but a much-needed explanation.

It just feels strange that the episode that is saying 'dont bully this guy because his body is a certain way' is also saying 'we support your decision to make everyone in the school fat because it's your greatest fear and youre lashing out at your peers because of it' ? I know, I know, it's not that deep, the writers weren't thinking about this shit.

*midori steps down from their soapbox*

i love the detail of Taishi wiping the steam off his glasses

now i want ramen T_T

Episode 6

Ata's umbrella has always FASCINATED me - bc i think the writers were just making him seem overly-fancy, but it reads gothic lolita??? So is he a prep or a goth??? what does he dress like outside of school??!?!? I must know!!!!!!

Taishi recites fun facts to self-soothe

Umbrella guy is me trying to make conversation at work lmao

It's interesting that Taiju and Maasa are taken aback by Ata talking about not wanting to carry the 'umbrellas of commoners', maybe theres a bit of Furanui's influence in there? and it's not normal for him to think like that?

LMAOOO I forgot about the bit with Nanao distracting umbrella guy, thats such a good bit

Ata 'likes spending time at home' PERFECT for my headcanon that he has social anxiety

Taiju wanting to stay longer bc Ata's not leaving bc he's worried Ata is taking this whole thing too seriously and needs to babysit a bit longer

'its hard to care when it's raining' PERFECT for my headcanon that Kyotaro has depression

I project a lot on these characters if you couldnt tell

[kafkaoftherubble]

年与年之间恍惚的阈限：末夜•旭日•无常

Part of this is cobbled from entries written on Paradehyde, 31st December 2023 at 10.38 p.m., and January 1st, 2024, both shortly after 12 am and 5.18 pm.

We haven't laid out our resolutions for this year. It should be done by this week.

Last year's Lyndises didn't make any resolution; we still didn't feel like the future would include us back then. The Knocking Lady didn't succeed in making any of us do what she really wanted, but she didn't really lose either. The future was tenebrous. Ungraspable. Packed with everyone else except us. There seemed to be no spot for us in the future; the future had overlooked us, we thought. It's like people; no matter how much I'm allowed to be around them, there will come a moment when I cease fulfilling their conditions, and they will leave, or I will fade away from them. It's not even out of malice. It just happens.

It's impermanence. Both the Lyndises and Fionn in the early days of the year already understood this. Hell, we understood this since we were kids. Impermanence. It's as natural as the sun rising and setting.

The year got better. My predecessors were really something. It wasn't really a mistaken boast when one of them declared, almost bitterly, "We always recover without help. We just do."

Though, it would be remiss of us to ignore the one who strived the hardest. "Without help" was a misnomer—this statement is only true if we treat Fionn as do the world out there does: as a non-person delusional existence attached to a person.

---

Last year's New Year Quote, according to Paradehyde, was Albert Camus' "One must imagine Sisyphus happy."

Last year's Word of the Year according to Lyndis of A Few Weeks Ago, was "interdependence." Because "dependent co-arising" was two words; it didn't fit the bill.

The Lyn at the Beginning of 2023 thought this would be "The Year of the White-Haired Boy." She meant Fionn, but the funny thing was that it turned out to be Gojo Satoru who hijacked that narrative. I didn't even realize I liked Satoru this much until that infamous Chapter 236. I could have gone on never knowing. And then he just took up my thoughts. And then I, supposed Dedicated Essayist for To Your Eternity, wrote essays on Jujutsu Kaisen. On Gojo Satoru, who already has a surplus of meta essays and whatnot.

Damn it.

I think another "Totally Trivial and Useless Realization" comparable to this Satoru shit is—okay, don't laugh—that we really, really, really... No wait, I said don't laugh, assholes! Don't laugh!

We really think, I mean, hypothetically... Like if a certain very famous Siddhartha was alive in our times, he might just be a cognitive scientist too. It seems so up his alley. I mean, yea whatever, he could totally become a philosopher and a teacher or something. But cognitive science, man. Come on. Makes too much sense when you really read what he said and thought about.

And I think—as in, I share the same sentiment as that unfortunate Lyndis who realized this while rambling about things with Lyishere—that if he were to be alive at this time, and I somehow got to know him personally... I think I'll like him a lot. I think I'll wanna befriend him and annoy the shit out of him and think about stuff with him and break his arguments apart if I don't think it holds. I would like to watch him all the way to his Awakening. I would like to study him. He would be very interesting to study—

"BRUH DID YOU JUST say your perfect partner is the Buddha?! HOLY SHIT, this is inSANE. OH MY GOD NEVER SAY MY STANDARDS ARE HIGH EVER AGAIN. LIKE MINE IS HIGH BUT NOT THE BUDDHA like bro ATEEZ MOUNTAIN MAN HIMBO CORE WITH OPPENHEIMER IQ IS ACTUALLY MORE NORMAL THAN THIS WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK"

Yea. I don't think anyone else needs to know about this. Let's just keep it between us, and Lyi, yea?

Fionn? Nah. He's more like Ananda than Siddhartha. Doesn't stop him from being someone I care about the most in this entire world, though.

---

I really like the days between the years. "Zwischen den Jahren" or something. It's its own liminal space, you know. And we are drawn to liminal spaces like that. It feels like where we seem to belong.

The thing about these days is that it makes for the best time to observe anicca! You watch the days between Christmas and New Year crawl toward finality. If it has been a bad year, it's ending. If it has been a good year, it's ending. If it has been a neutral year, it's ending. Everything ends. Nothing lasts.

And then, at one point, I suddenly felt quite... scared!

2023 started out not too impressive, but it progressively got better. In fact, it ended up being a huge step up from even the years before it. It was really the most bliss we had for a while.

And then, when 2024 came, I suddenly thought—well, who says it's gonna keep getting better? Who says it's gonna plateau in this comfortable stability, either? Everything is impermanent. Good times are impermanent too. Whatever peace I'm feeling right now—it's impermanent. It won't last forever. Something could come and yank it away from me.

And that, Lyndis of the Future, was me forgetting what anicca really means. As eventful or as storied as a moment may be, it will die. As packed with the strongest sentiments we could possibly experience or label—joy or stress or pleasure or pain or rapture or despair—no matter how royally this moment struts on a stage right now... it will drop dead and become history. Being momentous changes nothing. Being nondescript changes nothing.

So, of course the 8-foot Tall Woman jeered at me. I was scared of losing these good days because I grew attached to something impermanent in the first place. She would laugh at Fionn, too, because he tends to grasp on good moments and mope if something he likes is ending—for example, the end of a pleasurable trip would really make him brood.

It's kinda annoying cause' we often are aware of our attachments—that means we are knowingly being dissatisfied/suffering/distressed. Knowingly! It's like already knowing you're gonna hate this game, and you still buy it and play it. It's different from not knowing you'd hate this game and buying it and playing it, ya know.

"There's no fear for one whose mind is not filled with desires," said The Guy We Could Have Been Very Close Friends With Me. Well, we're certainly not without desires, that's for sure.

---

Fionn told me while we were lying on the floor listening to fireworks that though he was still thinking over his resolutions, there was one thing he wanted to continue pursuing: equanimity.

Well, I'm afraid you ain't getting that if you and I can't solve the attachment-to-impermanence problem, man.

The thing, guys, is that his resolutions are our resolutions. It's not a separate enterprise he undertakes on his own while I can undertake my efforts on my own. We are dependently co-arisen. He cannot get to where he wants if we don't help. It's the same in the world outside, between persons despite their supposed independence as human beings. One person cannot succeed without the backing of their closest, immediate environment; that includes the people in their lives.

So his wanting to pursue equanimity means we have to be resolute in that, too. What a drag.

The bigger drag is how, even though we started understanding anicca at a young age, we still grasp. I honestly don't think we have that many excuses.

You can forgive someone who didn't know much about this philosophy for being distressed over their attachments, but we already knew this and verified this through our own experience, over and over, at a young age.

You can forgive Past Lyndises for falling short because they were young, brain-not-matured-yet, inexperienced, and trying hard to survive, yadda-yadda. But I? I have no excuses. I am in a better position than my predecessor in January 2023 already. I am heir to the sum of their knowledge, experience, and thoughts. I honestly have no excuses.

I actually kinda like that. The fact that I have no excuses, I mean. To even arrive at this stage, where I'm living in such an optimal state as to have no excuses, means all of the previous Lyns have been skillful. They had, despite their circumstances, acted skillfully enough that now I am reaping the benefits! Isn't that swell? They planted causes that allow me good effects. Kamma done well, y'all. That's affirming shit right there!

I wouldn't want to let my Future Lyns down.

I wouldn't want to let Fionn down.

---

Emotions like anger and anxiety aren't permanent. I mean, they always seem permanent when they are happening, but that's an illusion. They cease on their own, ya know.

The reason why they don't cease, one of Past Us realized, is because you consciously or unconsciously extend them beyond their longevity.

Think of them as a flame on a candle. Before the flame dies out—which it will on its own—you keep lighting new candles with this flame. So the original candle of anxiety is dead, and yet new ones continue its existence... similar to a rebirth. You keep lighting new candles each time the old one is on its way out.

So this emotion is sustained. It looks like a blazing field, but if you look closely, it's really a sea of candles. And if you are heedful enough to refrain from lighting new candles, then you'll see even the strongest emotion die on its own course. That's just impermanence doing its work.

I wonder if this is, oddly enough, one solution for the impermanence of... well, bliss? Joy? What was that phrase again? Dittha-dhamma-sukha-vihara? Abiding in ease, here and now?

Anyway, lighting up candles with the flame of Ease before it die would mean sustaining Ease beyond its expiry date, right?

But Fionn raised a good point: I have to be really heedful of what candle to light, because if I accidentally light the ones of passion and excess joy, then I'll be stuck in a frenzy of lighting them forever before the flames run out.

It's got to do with dopamine. The pain in the death of "Good Times" is really the effect of lowered dopamine levels. The stronger the reduction, the stronger the crash. And dopamine acclimates itself to prolonged rewards and sets it as its new normal; it's how a brain functions. Something great will become merely good over time.

If I light the wrong candles, then I will lock myself into a constant fear of the flames blowing off, i.e. the crash of dopamine. The candles of passion are always getting shorter and shorter as dopamine acclimates itself to rewards, so I'll have to scramble to find more and more "arousing" (longer) candles to light. But that raises the "normal" dopamine level to even greater heights, making its crash even more terrifying and painful should it happen. I will only be even more scared.

Do you see what Fionn and I are seeing? We'll be enslaved by this fear. I'll be doomed to this Sisyphean work of lighting candles and stressing over when the crash is coming. It will be worse than Sisyphus's Rock-Rolling, because the slope keeps getting steeper, the rock larger, and the summit taller.

Sooner or later, not even the candles themselves will become joy. They will just morph into anxieties as if fucking Mahito had touched them and Mui Tenpen the shit out of them.

That's so unskillful! 嫌だ！

----

Which comes back to the question: what are we supposed to do?

Well... "What are we really trying to achieve" is a good question, I suppose:

Are we trying to extend a feeling of joy, or the longevity of "good things," beyond its expiry?

Or are we trying not to fear the impermanence of good things?

Which is it?

The more skillful goal seems to be the second one, methinks. The first is just good old "attachment" cosplaying as noble intent. Besides, the second goal is related to equanimity itself.

Oh, this is great! A good question to ponder during meditation! It will get us a tad bit closer to Fionn's resolution! Yes, this is a good start!

[tiredf-o-u-r]

More diary time … save space…

Not to sound like I dunno a greedy bitch but what the hell could possibly make up for this bullshit. Ok angel on my shoulder I get it not everything or anything is certain. But I thought it was supposed to be. They all said it would be. Didn’t they all say that? That life is worth living and there will be people that love you? When does that part happen? Is this an autism thing. I want to walk down the street and yell they could be lying they’re probably lying about something trust no bitch. But I don’t see that really achieving anything beneficial. It’s so fucking hard watching everyone bumble around with their feelings and intentions though. I understand why people become pretentious asshole loveless adults. I get it bro. Cynicism hits. Everyone is such loose canon. Are there normal fucking people? How could I ever get along with one after all this. I literally repel them bro I am a beacon for the Strange and Outcast I can’t help it. I don’t know what every one else is on that makes this worth it. Is validation really that bussin? Gender really fucks that hard when everyone agrees with you? It’s just not my destiny. I’m gonna like go sit alone at the same table every day for twenty years in some coffee shop in a city where I only ever interact with strangers and then die in an apartment and get eaten by cats bro GOD. Ok I’m not manifesting that ok that was a one off I want to be happy content one day. I do want that. I want that pretty badly. It’s just this fucking obstacle course between now and then. The survival rate is insane. This all sucks so bad. I have so much worked out at this point I’m so close to everything working out and ending I can be done with this stupid fucking school and get something out of it to dab on the haters and then I can fuck off okay it’s just a few more months of hell I should really get into some emdr. Might as well unleash the floodgates right. I’m already stewing about it all the time. What if I get invested in someone and then they leave again. I’m not bulletproof.

[legthief]

one of my favorite things about hypmic is how integral hair colors are to the character design. their hair colors all mean something and they’re so deliberate.

yamada brothers all have black hair to match their normal ass names and remind you that they are, really, just normal kids.

samatoki and nemu have white hair to contrast them. i could talk forever about how samatoki and nemu are designed to directly contrast ichiro but that’s for another time. jyuto is the Normal One, hence the normal brown hair. rio is ginger just to remind you that he’s white lmao.

all the members of matenrou have dual-colored hair to match their dual personalities, with a more normal color of hair layered over the more absurd one. this is important, because their more socially acceptable personality is what they are more like most of the time. (they are autistic) people perceive them as completely normal functioning adults before finding out that they are, in fact, not at all normal.

ramuda is pink because of his chuoku affiliation BUT! there’s more! his hair is dual-colored, but fades to purple rather than having a hard switch from pink to purple. much like i said about matenrou, the dual hair color is indicative of a dual personality. ramuda’s dual personality is different from matenrou, however, because the distinction between his cute persona and his darker persona as his real self kind of doesn’t exist. instead of drunk jakurai, host hifumi, or angry doppo, which are all not the true personalities of the matenrou members, dark ramuda and cute ramuda are equally the real ramuda. gentaro has brown hair so not to clash with his clothing, but also to emphasize that he’s supposed to be more of a narrator-type character, to fade into the background and let the story unfold, to finish his brother’s work and then vanish as though he were never there. dice’s hair is blue to oppose chuoku’s pink and his mother, while still being a link to her, and to contrast ramuda.

kuko’s hair is red, and i like to believe that it’s supposed to be like fire, connecting him to his sun motif but also to ichiro, who is often associated with fire. i sound ridiculous, but let’s keep going. bringing back the dual-colored hair i talked about before, jyushi’s odd hair color is outside, completely opposite from matenrou. jyushi’s chuunibyou personality only appears around people he doesn’t know, or doesn’t feel comfortable around (like a mask. autism), so naturally his hair’s eccentric accents are outside, rather than inside. hitoya is yet another case of the Normal Guy, but this time i want to say it’s because of jakurai. hitoya’s hair color is so incredibly common and average, two words i believe hitoya hates. you know who has a unique hair color? jakurai. hitoya is average, jakurai is not. sorry i get more insane the further down the post goes.

sasara is like ramuda, and i hate to break it to you, but we don’t actually know sasara that well. he’s definitely a many-layered character, and the fact that he will hide what he’s thinking and put on the mask of a silly guy makes me believe that his hair going from dark to light is deliberate. rosho is yet another dual-colored hair case, but he’s special because he’s only got a few streaks of lighter purple. these few streaks sort of symbolize how he gets when he’s mad, or maybe even how he’s a completely different person speaking to a crowd versus speaking to an individual. there’s nothing i can say about rei that i didn’t cover with the buster bros.

this has been division all-stars posting with leg, stay tuned for more. i am writing this while incredibly tired so assume any error i make in my grammar or typing is a result of that.

[lollytea]

LOLLY. I AM SHAKING YOU IN JOY AND PAIN. STRAY ITALIAN GREYHOUND. THIS SONG.

Okay, so I of course stole it off your Hunlow playlist because it's perfect for Hunter and how he sees Willow.

or so I THOUGHT. Until TODAY.

BECAUSWHFHAHHD like,

"I've just settled into the glass half empty made myself at home

And so why now?

Oh, please not now

I just stopped believing in happy endings, harbors of my own"

I know that in FTF Willow only lets herself feel this way for a moment, before Hunter reminds her of who she is BYYY:

"But you had to come along didn't you

Tear down the doors

Throw open windows

Oh, if you knew just what a fool you have made me

So what do I do with this?"

He tore open the doors (vines lol) literally and figuratively! And what is she supposed to do with that?? Fall in love. Obviously. How could you NOT after a cute boy teleports you out of self-loathing and doubt!?

LIKE:

"This sudden burst of sunlight

And me with my umbrella"

I AM NOT OKAY. THIS REVELATION HAS ALTERED MY BRAIN CHEMISTRY.

It still works from Hunter's perspective too, obviously, from like ASIAS onward but after FTF I think it works the other way around too and I just. They're just. PAIN. MY HEART BRO. There are so many other lyrics that fit in the little music video in my head of the two of them but I'm literally on my break at work and need to go LMAO

Sorry for just vomiting in your ask box😂

This is the second time this month I've made somebody go insane over the Stray Italian Greyhound and huntlow combo. Vienna Teng put some fucking CHEMICALS in that song!!! Turns the freakin frogs gay!!!!

And YEAH!!! I added it to the playlist back when I made it after Labyrinth Runners. Because that's what I associated it with at the time!!! Hunter's lost his home, his family, his religion, his identity, his sense of safety. He's LOST everything!!! And he's struggling to come to terms with that. By the time Gus finds him at Hexside, the shock has subsided and he thinks he can be functional now. But he's not okay. He's still got a lot going on mentally and it's messing him up.

But at the same time....hallway blush scene....he has his little "Oh. It's her." moment. And I know that he was very confused in the aftermath of the Hexside incident. And when he's left alone to reflect on what he's feeling he's just "Now?? Are you fucking serious?? We're really gonna do this now??? I just found out I'm not a real person and everybody's gonna die next week, is now REALLY the fucking time???" He has ENOUGH problems!! He doesn't know how to deal with this!! But also he can't help it because while he's fucked up and traumatized, he's also brimming with confusing fizzling teenage hormones and she's Willow Park and it's very overwhelming and scary and doesn't know which way is up or down and he has no idea what he's gonna do about this. Feelings like these demand so much from him and after everything he's been through he really doesn't know if he can stomach it. But she won't give him a moment to catch his breath and he's locked in now and there's nothing he can do about it.

BUT YEAH!!!! I've had that playlist on quite a lot since FTF leaked because I have been so not normal about them. So I have NOTICED that it now applies to multiple different angles. And thinking about the chorus from Willow's perspective during the whole vine scene makes me ILL. And then in the aftermath of that....the vibes of that song are so....terrified yet giddy and overwhelmed yet euphoric. How fucking soft and blushy Willow was after that scene. "Just what a fool you have made me" YEAH!!!!

He IS a sudden burst of sunlight!!!

She IS with her umbrella!!!!

ALSO ALSO ALSO!!! Being a girl who has such a tight reign over her own emotions completely falling victim to loserish behaviour during this part? Ready to fucking combust cuz she is being held so gently.

"What do I do, do I do with a love that won't sit still?

Won't do what it's told"

HATE this song, HATE them!!!!

[beels-burger-babe]

Of Jealousy and Friendship - Epilogue

*** Back due to popular demand, here is a little epilogue for what happened at school the next day after pt. 2 Enjoy! - B***

Summary: MC makes a lower demon friend who may secretly be hoping for something more than friendship. The Demon Bros are not about to let this happen.

TW: Discussions about scenting and non-consensual physical contact. PART ONE, PART TWO

The next day of school was...interesting to say the least. For starters, the brothers refused to leave your side. There was one of them lingering near you at all times. Some of them had the decency to try and be subtle. Satan would just happen to be studying in the same room as you, or Belphie was napping and was wondering if you could keep an eye on his things while he did. But then there were the others who were more than obvious. Mammon and Asmodeus both had to pried off of your arms by Lucifer to get them to actually go to their own classes. Leviathan, despite usually doing his classes at home in his room, actually attended school that day and insisted that he needed your help finding a few rooms here and there. The normally sweet and friendly Beel was glaring at any lower demon that so much as looked in your direction. And boy did they look. The moment you took a step into a classroom, you could see a number of lower demons flinch back at the combined strong sent of seven of the most powerful demons in the Devildom. Everywhere you went, whispers seemed to follow you. There were undoubtedly rumours about what you might have done in order to trick the brothers into favouring you; though you never heard any of them since no one dared to come within a ten-foot radius of you.

This bothered you a little at first. Being the center of attention, especially this kind of attention, was never fun to anybody. But by the end of the day, rather than being disheartened by it, you were just exhausted. Finally, the last class of the day had arrived; the one you had been dreading since the moment your alarm went off that morning - Magical Potions.

Beel shifted from foot to foot as the two of you lingered in the entrance. "Do you really have to go to this class? You could just skip and come get some snacks with me instead." You smiled sympathetically at Beel and patted his shoulder. "Sorry, Beel. Diavolo expects good things from his exchange students. I need to keep my grades high, or who knows what Lucifer will do as punishment." The redhead pouted. "Lucifer would understand, I think. All things considered." You snorted and began to walk into the classroom. "Go to your own class, Beel. You can come to get me afterwards, and walk me home with Mammon if you really want."

Beelzebub mumbled to himself, before turning and finally walking off. You entered the class, ignoring the few gasps and gaping stares that you got as you walked through the room, and took your seat. You had been setting up for another class of note-taking when the door opened once more. Standing in the doorway, staring at you with wide eyes, was Cane. The moment your eyes met, the shocked expression on his face instantly dissipated and he flashed you a charming smile. You could feel a bubble of annoyance and anger begin to rise within you. The cocky demon swaggered over and plopped down into his seat beside you. "Hey, there Dare Devil. You didn't get in too much trouble last night with the big bad Avatars did you?" as he spoke he draped an arm on the back of your chair.

You eyed his exposed wrist and pushed his arm off of your chair. It seemed not even the obvious scenting that was supposed to tell him to back off would get him to take a hint. "No, I didn't. Though they did tell me a few interesting things last night." Cane chuckled and leaned into his palm as he smirked at you. "I'm assuming it has something to do with the reason why you smell like hell-incarnate?"

You scoffed and narrowed your eyes at him. "I'm sure you'd rather I smell like you. Considering you apparently did your best to make that happen yesterday." Cane tensed for a moment, and you could practically see the gears turning in his head. Eventually, his expression fell into one of confusion as he frowned at you. "Are you talking about how I scented you? MC, do you really think I would do something like that without a good reason?" The frustration in you began to grow and grow inside you; somewhere across the school grounds, Satan sneezed. You weren't in the mood to have this talk now, and very much wished that your professor would hurry up and start the god damn class already. "I don't know you Cane. How am I supposed to know whether or not that's something you would do?" That stupid smug look on his face returned once more and you had to resist the urge to slap it off of him. "You seemed to know me well enough to go out with me yesterday. You didn't seem worried about whether or not I was too much of a stranger when we were dancing at the club and walking downtown late at night, where anything could've happened to a small little human like you," he chuckled as your face scrunched up in annoyance and leaned back into his chair. "I didn't scent you for any perverted reasons. I did it to keep you safe while we were out. I knew if you had my scent on you, you'd be less likely to get attacked, and I was right," he sheepishly scratched the back of his neck. "Admittedly, I should've asked first, and that's on me. But I really just wanted to make sure that my new friend didn't get hurt." He was lying. He had to be. If that asshole seriously thought you were stupid enough to buy that lame excuse, he was extremely wrong. You opened your mouth to tell him as much but were interrupted by a familiar deep voice clearing their throat behind you. "That is the worse excuse I've ever heard, and I live with Mammon." Cane stiffened in front of you before he looked up to meet the glaring eyes of Lucifer, and smiled. "Lord Lucifer, I'm afraid I don't know what you mean. I would never lie, especially not to a friend like MC." The classroom seemed to be on the edge of their seats as everyone quickly picked up on the showdown that was happening right in front of them. One lower demon of gluttony even pulled out a bag of popcorn. Lucifer tsked and crossed his arms over his chest. "Do not insult mine and MC's intelligence like that. Sure scenting can be helpful to ward off other demons, but only if the scent is associated with a more powerful demon. Nobody would blink an eye at anything coated in your weak, disgusting scent." Cane scoffed and tilted his head. "Evidently you did last night. Don't think I didn't notice you and your brother's reactions." This gained a few gasps from your classmates. No one could believe that someone, that wasn't his brothers, was actually trying to stand up against Lucifer. The idea itself was insane. Even seeing it in front of their own eyes, most could hardly believe it, yourself included. Lucifer maintained his indifferent expression and raised an eyebrow at Cane. "You mistook our irritation and disbelief that someone would be so stupid as to even attempt scenting our charge for being even the slightest bit phased by you," he took a step closer to Cane, bending down to be eye level with him. "You should consider yourself lucky it was Asmodeus and myself that got to the two of you first. Should it have been one of my more reckless brothers, you would've been nothing but a pile of ribbons in our driveway," Lucifer's eyes gleamed with satisfaction as Cane gulped and took a step back. The Morningstar grinned dangerously. "MC is our charge. They are our family and our responsibility. Unlike you, we actually got their permission to be scented and bonded to them last night; meaning my brothers are more protective than ever. I would never stoop so low as to waste my energy on a pitiful excuse for a demon-like yourself. But I know for a fact, that Beelzebub eats demons like you as a snack on

days when he is particularly famished. Satan occasionally brings one home for his latest experiments. Belphegor has torn through an entire percentage of them when he hasn't gotten enough sleep. Asmodeus is surprisingly prone to temper tantrums and fits of jealousy. Leviathan drowns anyone that disrespects the things that he loves. And Mammon doesn't take too kindly to people touching things that he considers his." Cane's hands balled into fists, but even then, the tremble in them was still glaringly obvious. Lucifer remained unphased and unmoved by the reactions he was pulling from his victim; though anyone could sense the air of utter glee that was exuding off of him. "If I were you, Cane, I would sleep with one eye open." The teacher finally walked in and raised an eyebrow at the scene in front of them. "Lord Lucifer, is there a reason you are harassing my student?" Cane whimpered as Lucifer smirked at him before standing straight and turning to the teacher. "Not at all, professor. I am actually here to inform you that MC will no longer be enrolled in this class." You whipped your head up to look at him as he placed a hand on your shoulder. "The student council has realized it would be a much better decision to have the exchange students more knowledgable to the ways and customs of demons during their visit here, so MC will be enrolled in Devildom Culture Studies instead. We wouldn't want someone to take advantage of them just because they were taught our ways, now would we?" The last line was spoken coldly and pointedly as though to drive in his threats to Cane. The teacher sighed but seemed to know that there was no point arguing and instructed you to gather your things. You did so happily and quickly. As you left the classroom and walked through your halls with Lucifer, you bumped him gently with your hip. "Thanks, Lucifer. You really are the best." His chest puffed up the slightest bit in pride as he continued walking forward with his hand still on your shoulder. "There is nothing to thank me for MC. I was just doing my duty as Vice-President of the student council to ensure that the exchange students are happy and safe." But even as he said the words, you knew that wasn't the case. You were MC. The human that wormed their way into the hearts of the seven strongest demons in the Devildom. For that reason alone, you were untouchable to all others, and Lucifer and his brothers would ensure that for as long as they breathed. And whoever disagreed would have to be ready to face the consequences.

TAGLIST: @henry-and-the-seven-lords

@hopefulann

@vampwiire

@bunna-does-stuff

@obey-mes-treasure

@obeythebutler

[stormblessed95]

You know how it feels to be called crazy by people who whip out the "they're brothers!!! shippers are all sick!!" argument every time you see clearly that Jikook are in a completely different league and don't behave like bros at all? That's how I feel this month on Jikook blogs,and it's twice as painful because these are supposed to be my people. During the Butter promotions,there was a time when Jimin and Jungkook weren't interacting almost at all. That's the reality. I'm not saying they are-

-over. I literally have no idea what happens to them behind the scenes,same as every other fan. If they are together,I don't want them to ever break up,because I love them both and their relationship is one of the healthiest and most loving I have ever seen. But I am sick of the fact that anywhere you go in this fandom,sooner or later you'll get called crazy or told you're not a real fan for noticing something negative. Couples fight sometimes. Coworkers disagree. Friends fight. If Jikook are all three,it's impossible for them to *never* fight. We pride ourselves of having our eyes open,but whenever someone voices a BTS or Jikook related worry,we just try to make each other shut up. I don't want all my interactions with other Jikook supporters to be ruled by the fear of potentially enabling toxic Tkk. Doesn't doubling down and pretending everything is always fine with BTS,all the time,and they never unhappy or have conflicts,make me as delusional as those tkk?

Look, im not quite sure what you are looking for here. A safe place to say that KM fight? Yes, they do. I've posted about their 2 big fights we know about already and it would be stupid to say there haven't been probably a million more that we don't and won't ever know about. Fighting isn't always a bad thing in relationships and even just friendships. Fighting is a way of communicating. As long as it is done while maintaining mutual respect and boundaries obviously. Yes, Jimin and Jungkook, no matter what their relationship is to each other have, and probably will continue to fight over things. I got into it with my husband just last month and can tell you that even as I was super pissy, I was also still insanely in love with him. Fights happen, fights are normal, fights are healthy even. I'm positive that they fight.

Do I think that they haven't been interacting during Butter promotions? Um, no. I very much so disagree with you. But that is the beauty of being human. We are all allowed different opinions and we all see things differently. I am also going to ask you to remove the collective "we" from your statement though. I have never tried to make everyone see things the way that I see them. I state my opinions and you all can do with that whatever you want to do with it. And goodness, saying that I (or anyone else) disagrees about their being a lack of interaction is NOT the same thing as doubling down and pretending everything is fine when it isn't. That's slightly offensive honestly. I DO pride myself on trying to maintain a more objective stance on "shipping" culture. I don't wear blinders and only see whatever I want to see. I just also simply am not seeing where you or any potential others are seeing the problem here.

I also want you to take a minute and keep in mind how released content works. We are STILL getting behind the scenes content from Dynamite era that we had never seen before. I remember Jkkrs complaining about a lack of KM content during the making video for Dynamite, and then just a few months ago (almost 7 months later) we got Bangtan Bombs of jikook stuck to each other like glue during the whole thing over and over again. Plus we are STILL in the middle of Butter promotions. We are STILL getting content being released from that. The moments released today of Jikook holding hands during the Xylitol commercial? Yeah, that was filmed during the same time as the start of Butter promotions. The jacket shooting sketch behind? Filmed during Butter promotion time. All that Jungkook purple hair content? Filmed months ago during Butter promotions time. And it's still on going. They've moved on to performances and Big hit is still slowly giving out content to keep the bread coming in for Butter. We literally have probably only seen half the content for Butter so far. PLUS we will probably be getting Bangtan Bombs from the Butter era well into 2022. We aren't getting many live streams, everything is prerecorded and pre-planned. Not much room for behind the scenes silliness that we get to see. But when we DO see it, we see them together in the background. Lee Hyun's video? That was taken right before American interviews for Butter, so during Butter promotions. People had been saying they weren't interacting during interviews, but behind the scenes, you had them walking around clingy and singing together.... even just today, they released more short clips of all 7 guys for Butter promotions. We are STILL getting content for it.

And just because I personally like visuals to go with my posts, here is just some of Jikook from a wide range of time, but all during "Butter" era. We have the Butter press conference photos, the cuddled up together pose, and looking at each other while everyone else looked at the camera with their pretend buttered bread.

We have the Butter Vlive where they giggled together often and even waved to each other through the screens watching the vlive and smiling together

We have all this from June, Festa and Muster, Butter is still technically being promoted during this time, the song had very recently just been released, sooo do these interactions just not count since it's not promotional material?

From behind the scenes getting ready for interviews to promote Butter in America

From the recent Run episodes, but filmed back during when Butter was being filmed

During the Jacket shooting sketch for Butter:

Filmed around the same time as all the Butter stuff, released very recently, Xylitol behind the scenes holding hands

And also very recently, not technically a Butter promotion, but PTD is included in the whole Butter CD and era I feel like, their reaction to PTD, very cute and happy together.

Now I don't know if there are particular moments you are speaking of, but I wouldn't automatically assume they are fighting or not interacting or something is wrong, because again, we probably won't even get all the content they plan to give us about this era until next year. And you could be all worried about them not looking at each other during xyz video, only to get a behind bangtan bomb in a year showing them giggling together over Tae breaking a pair of sunglasses or something equally silly. Or of them curled up on the couch taking a nap together.

Am I trying to tell you that you are crazy or incorrect? No. I'm simply telling you that I disagree. And that is allowed. You also aren't allowed to tell me that I'm being delusional for thinking everything between them is just fine. You ARE allowed to disagree with me. That's just fine, that is human nature. "We" as jikookers do not have to agree on everything all the time. That would honestly be weird. In fact, I'm not even here to change your mind. I'm just simply.... disagreeing. I have seen plenty of interaction through the entire year, they seem fine and happy and content in the content I have seen of them so far. I think its fine.

Do I think they have probably had some arguments this year? Sure, we are 7 months in. It would be totally normal if they showed up to film something and were slightly annoyed with each other over a petty argument of someone not doing the dishes last night, or leaving their shoes out and the other tripping over them. Anything at all! Where maybe they don't get all flirty that day, but ultimately they are fine, go home. Do the dishes, apologize for being petty and move on happily. It's also important to remember that long term relationships are more settled, they don't HAVE to be flirty and on top of each other 24/7. Lol I haven't seen anything that seems like they are "off" or ignoring each other purposefully or having a serious disagreement over something this year at all. But that's just me.

Sorry, I know it's probably not what you wanted to hear, but it's how I feel. If you are feeling distressed, it's okay to take a step back from KM blogs or stan Twitter and just focus on how you see things and how you feel about it. Or simply just focus on the music? Do what is best for you, in the end. Hopefully you are okay with I guess simply agreeing to disagree over this one. I do truly hope you have a good day 💜

[unlikelywrestlingfan]

I have never watched NJPW, but I am learning and had many thoughts on the BoSJ press conference it was delightful:

Hiromu Takahashi starting a speech when he was just supposed to pose and then sit XD

There are sunflowers on his back

Hiromu Takahashi - gives long and passionate speech and performs a song. YOH - “Hi. I am going to do my best. ✌”

Ryusuke Taiguchi - looks like a distinguished old man but he is talking about his butt so I believe my guess of “looks normal is insane” is pretty accurate

I am OBSESSED with watching the other competitors reacting as people.  speak. YOH looked like he was trying not to laugh at Taiguchi

YOH - I was not expecting his voice to be that deep. His epithet and the way he says it makes him sound like a Kamen Rider character (complimentary) but he too serious for that hmmmmm. I am intrigued.

Clark Connors - was SHOOK when be started speaking Japanese. Had very sweet things to say about the fans, which goes against the vibes he was giving me, but noice noice.

Kanemaru - he talked about Taiguchi’s butt, for some reason, and YOH looked like he was desperately trying not to laugh XD

Taiji Ishimori - went through a list of competitors by name or epithet and I was following along till he got to “wrench guy.” Seems v intense. Wants to break everything, I’m here for it.

SHO - Also says literally almost nothing aldkfja ldsk f I saw something earlier that implied he and YOH used to be a team?? (Edit after a google - oh Roppongi 3K! Rocky Romero managed them. Seems like they had a breakup? which is so sad because they have matching names.)

Ace Austin - His sunglasses are everything. He looks like a combo of an anime cosplayer and a Gambit (X-Men) cosplayer. Watching him (as far as I know, couldn’t find out for sure when I googled) not understand anything that’s being said so really cashing in his facial reactions when Clark Connors was talking was delightful. I skimmed the results of BoSJ night 1 and apparently he cut the webbing of someone’s fingers with a playing card, which is EXACTLY what I would expect from a person from Impact (affectionate). No idea how to feel about this guy. WHAT IS THE STICK FOR? IS IT A POOL CUE? A POINTER STICK? A STABBY BOI?

Distracted by YOH in the background - he either looks like he’s going to laugh or like he’s #so above it all lol. He’s like actively avoiding making eye contact with the camera. He is nodding.

They are translating Austin’s speech now. He nommed his card, which seems t obe a thing for him. Then he stuck it back in his sleeve. Does he have a special compartment for that?

Alex Zayne - this man looks like an action anime vampire. I’ve never seen Helsing but that one.The only part of his outfit that is not red is his tie and his gages. I love the angle he’s doing with not being signed, creative! I am fascinated by his hair but v put off by “sauce.” You do you tho, man!

Franciso Akira - Ah, the Italian. YOU’RE 22? HE’S YOUNGER THAN ME. I just realized that either Ace Austin’s hair is black in the middle or it’s the lighting (he and YOH are seated right behind the podium, so you can see their reactions the most). WAIT THIS DUDE JUST SAID HE WANTS TO BURN EL DESPERADO’S MASK BRO THAT’S NOT COOL. WE DO NOT TOUCH THE MASKS.

The subtitles went away where did they go???? Oh wait they repeated the question in English nvm

Clark Connors is talking, and Hiromu’s head is at the bottom of the screen. He’s just vibing. I want to boop his nose.

Okay, time for B Block! A Block is leaving. Ace Austin knocked over his title display thing by accident and didn’t pick it back up. #heeltactics

*deep sigh* Okay so I watched and typed out all of B Block, with lots of detail and fun, but Tumblr glitched and didn’t save it. I’m v mad but can’t recover it. Gonna recreate as much as I can...

They are doing their entrances. Master Wato’s pose is so fun. Despy El Desperado walks so jauntily. And that jaunty bow! Yuta getting up to help when someone fell!! And Titan and El Desperado!! El Phantasmo, I’ve only known you for about 20 seconds, but you already exude a-hole energy. And now he’s on the floor. 

Master Wato - Rip the mic not being on XD. He seems v intense, I’m here for it. You go, Classical Musician Anime Character Guy XD

Robbie Eagles - HIS SUIT IS ALL VELVETY THIS ADDS TO MY HE IS A MEMBER OF GREEN DAY OR FALL OUT BOY THAT BECAME A WRESTLER CLAIM. Whoever put Yuta right behind the podium, meaning we can see all his reactions, ily. 

Titan - Oh really sweet speech!! I like him!! Also his mask is v shiney

BUSHI - he’s Naito’s wrasslin’ husband, right? Oh, happy 15th career annivesary, sir!

Douki - OOOOO his ponytail!!! I like his mask too.

El Desperado -  Dude, he was so calm and then continued to be calm as he ROASTED Master Wato. Now he’s roasting someone else but I’m not sure who - now Douki is standing up THEY ARE BUTTING HEADS (yes I did go back to watch Yuta’s reaction he put his hands up all cute like “I’m not part of this” and smiled). Someone was saying, “slap him, Douki!” but I couldn’t tell who. OOO HE BROKE OUT A PUN. Is El Desperado always this mean?? Does Douki have this coming?? What is the beef????

El Lindaman - I got jumpscared by his sudden yell XD. “Have a GLEAT time,” the poses, the passion. This man is a tokusatsu character (affectionate). Ooooo a rejected underdog story? I’m a sucker for those!

Wheeler Yuta - He mentioned his new dads!! Also ��😍😍😍😍😍

TJP - What does he have? A mask. YOU STOLE IT? YOU WANT TO STEAL ALL THEIR MASKS??? NOT COOL!! Also he started with “I’m not gonna thank anybody” and Yoots’ reaction XD. Wait this guy’s beaten Kota? Dang (also Kota :((((( I hope he’s okay)

El Phantasmo - Does he ever stop talking? Can he please stop talking??? He never had a chance with me because he’s friends with Jay White but WOW (as usual my hate is for the characters not the people who play them #disclaimer)

[onebizarrekai]

v3′s art is comically terrible for a professionally distributed game in a series: a compilation

in this not-essay I will list all of the mistakes and problems I have spotted in v3′s art. don’t worry, it’s entirely for fun and I’m doing this on a whim, so please feel free to not take this seriously but also it’s hilarious and embarrassing how ridiculous this is like what happened did they speedrun the whole production or what

see, there are some things you can take as meta like “they made it bad on purpose to allude to the downfall of tv shows that have been on air for much too long” but I have a very strong feeling this is not the case due to the nature of some of these errors

disclaimer, the more I study this art, the more I fear that the artists were underpaid and underslept, so if this is in fact the case, I am so sorry to all of them but also I’m going to make fun of the art anyway

anyway let’s get started!

if you study this image for longer than 5 seconds, you will see that kaede is the only one fully shaded and keebo is literally just his normal sprite pasted into the image. every other character is just an ordinary ref, hence most of them facing the exact same direction with neutral expressions on their faces. it looks like a bad edit, and is probably one of the worst pieces of art in the game. it kind of gets better from here on, but my roasting will not.

with that out of the way, here’s the problem that officially bothers me the most and clarifies my viewpoint of “this is not meta and an actual lack of company communication”

this freaking cg, which seems normal at a glance, but some wiseass was like “oh, kaede is a girl, so obviously she’s going to be shorter than the Male Protagonist™” ah, that’s funny. because if you look at the character bios, kaede is, in fact, one inch taller than shuichi and not like 6 inches shorter as she is shown here.

also shuichi’s shoulder is disproportionate and horrendous and he looks vaguely like a jojo character, but I wasn’t even thinking about that until right now.

thanks guys, 50% of the fandom who has never bothered to check these bios thinks that kaede is like 5′3 (did the developers really put so little thought into her to the point where drawing her correctly in the game didn’t even matter??)

also I would like to point out that, even though this isn’t related to the art itself, yes, a character kaede’s size being only 117 lbs is unfeasible, but this applies to literally every character in danganronpa ever and it’s not new news that it’s unrealistic

update: someone in the tags informed me that in versions of the game that use centimeters, like the japanese version, kaede is actually shorter than shuichi, which just adds another thing to the list of weird decisions the localization team made for no reason. that said, after confirming this, kaede is 167 cm in the original, while shuichi is 171 cm, which are approximately 5′6 and 5′7 respectively, but one inch is still nowhere near as drastic as it is depicted above. (in spite of this, I would rather depict kaede as slightly taller, so I’m probably going to keep doing that.)

the journey continues!

bro if you want kaede to have shoulder length hair then stick to it to begin with

you can pretend this is at an angle all you want but they definitely committed the shorter kaede sin a second time

wait a goddamn second.

DO YOU SEE THIS

no………… it wasn’t kaede who shrank. it was shuichi who got taller

speaking of which, can we talk about how shady the perspective is in this elevator pic? look at shuichi and kokichi in comparison to kaede. kokichi, who is canonically 7 inches (edit: or 5, if you’re loyal to the original) shorter than kaede, looks taller than kaede. he’s growing too. what steroids are these gays taking

running into the room, electric boogaloo: I don’t think tsumugi is supposed to be the same height as kokichi

gonta… gonta you’re lookin a bit like a jojo character there

I love how kaito’s head looks kind of like it was pasted onto his body. why is he the same size as shuichi? shouldn’t he be high school bully size or something? his torso is teensy

ah yes, white angie.

I love this cg but why is shuichi’s right hand so much bigger than his left hand

I also love how this cg looks like they literally took pictures of trees and pasted them into the background, especially on the left. the shadows are so weird, especially closer to the ceiling, it’s difficult for me to believe they didn’t do exactly that.

return of Enlarged shuichi

puberty update: kokichi is now taller than shuichi in spite of shuichi never missing leg day. what crimes will he commit

I have to mention it, guys. this has to be one of the worst danganronpa cgs. kokichi’s facial proportions look atrocious. look at the way his face sticks out like his jaw is in the wrong place. his scarf is a pasted texture. that’s it. this moment was so iconic but the cg just looks so… so… off. like something is terribly wrong, but you can’t put your finger on it.

you know what? let’s get into that ‘pasted texture’ thing.

let’s imagine you’re an artist working on a professional game. you’re assigned to draw cgs of kokichi ouma, who has a checkered scarf from hell. sure, it will be terrible to draw, but you only have to draw it once at a time! plus, perspective is pretty important, right? can you be bothered? nah, actually. let’s just copy paste a checkered pattern into the cg, because I’m sure nobody will notice. it’ll blend right in with the other cgs that someone actually put effort into drawing his scarf in, right?

no. the answer is no and I very much noticed. this genuinely looks terrible and I would understand taking a shortcut like that in fanart or even an indie game but this is a full price pc and console distributed game

(an addition: look at kokichi’s TINY HANDS in that last one)

meanwhile, they straight up forgot to color in kokichi’s scarf in this cg.

dude. I forgot about whatever the hell this cg was. anyway look at keebo please just look at him

lovin kaito’s baby arms

real talk, maybe you could argue that he’s missing muscle because he’s deathly sick, but most of his cgs don’t line up with this, and his arms just look disproportionate to his torso size (granted this is a consistent problem across all danganronpa games and a lot of characters have this weird problem, like hajime, but also kaito is bigger than hajime so I kind of have higher expectations of him) maybe it’s his stupid goatee and the way he reminds me of yasuhiro?? it creates this illusion that he’s older than he is and so I keep expecting him to look more like an adult

oh, also rantaro is missing some of his accessories in that video he made–you know the one–but I don’t wanna go back and screenshot it

also you may have noticed that I’m skipping all of the monokub cgs because I literally do not care about them and I’m not even bothering to check and see if they have artistic mistakes in them

JIMMY NEUTRON???

hey um uh kaito you seem to be missing your neck

hey guys do you like my pregame fanart

so, that done, the sprites are also pretty terrible at times. they’re not as interesting to go through, however, and downloading the full sprite sets for every character and studying every single one of them will drive me insane, so I’ll just sum some of the ones I noticed up. I made things for kaede and shuichi before deciding I wasn’t going to get into it, so here are these.

that said, other mistakes include kokichi missing his purple highlights in all of the sprites encompassing a specific pose, stray pixels all over the place on everyone, and everyone also has heavily inconsistent shading, but literally all I think about is how pregame shuichi is unshaded and two of kaede’s pregame sprites have glaring outfit change mistakes in them

anyway, thank you for taking the time to read my ridiculous ramble. in all seriousness, there’s this looming presence of some lack of communication in the development team, like with all the art and design inconsistencies, pieces and sprites that look rushed, stray pixels, and missing basic proportional stuff. these are the kinds of things that you supposedly have to pretty much have in the bag in order to get jobs in professional businesses, so it’s really weird to me that this game suffers from so many of these problems. it’s like they tried to make the art so much more crisp than the other games, but it fell on its face as they realized it was going to take longer to draw everything and they started to rush. it’s weird, because the coloring itself looks normal–it’s just sloppily drawn, and the proportions are a mess once put into the context of perspective. many of the cgs look like they were drawn by different people, and I’m still not over the fact that half of kokichi’s cgs have his scarf pasted in as a texture.

the moral of the story is that if you’re selling a game at full price that also happens to be in a series that has had 3 very good games in it already the stakes should probably be higher than this. v3 has been out for more than 3 years and it’s still $40 (did it cost more than that before? I sure hope not), and the overarching quality of the game is just not as high as the other games. I’m not saying that the other games don’t have any problems with their art at all, they’re just not as glaringly obvious and every artistic choice in those games feels intentional.

regardless, I had a blast roasting the art at 2am, so maybe you got a kick out of all this chaos.

[dangermousie]

CFC Chapter 54

“A crashing car?” Ahahahaha I see you, Meatbun. But it was indeed an utter pileup!

I know I commented on this passage in its various iterations eight billion times already but I still have more to say. And it’s that XQC taking so long to realize that even though HY is young, his emotions and feelings are as genuine and strong as those of anyone older is so realistic - people do tend to think that especially with regard to children - think of a reaction of an adult to a three year old crying over ice cream they dropped. It’s all amused even if not meanly so. Because to an adult with vastly more experience, this is not a big deal. But what that forgets is that whether it’s ridiculous to someone else or not, to the person at issue that is a real feeling, AND that of course a person can only feel through the lens of their experience - what else is there? Emotions aren’t any less valid because they are informed by lesser or different experience.

Honestly, to me so far this is one of the driving messages of the novel - everyone is in their own world of issues and pain and none of these characters can truly look through the lens of another person and it would be so much better if they did. To XQC, for so long, He Yu’s strong feelings (and we know so many of these feelings are awful - despair, and self-loathing, and loneliness) never quite felt real and therefore never quite felt fully valid. And by the time it wasn’t the case, it was too late.

But the same is true for He Yu - he is so concentrated on his own grievances and his own pain, he cannot perceive others’ different issues. In He Yu’s mind, he’s the winner and always champion of Misery Olympics and while he’s had a horrible time of it, that doesn’t mean other people didn’t either just in different ways. Whether because of his condition, his issues or just his age, HY is not empathetic in the least.

And think about it - XQC does not have a horrible illness. He does not have unfeeling parents. But he had to watch his beloved parents brutally murdered in front of his eyes at 13 (!!!!) and then had to raise a 5 year old by himself. Is it worse or better than HY’s trauma? That’s a matter of opinion but what there is no question about is that is a different type of trauma and a different type of scar. Or think about the patient in the asylum whose name I am too lazy to look up - her life is such a theater of horrors that to me, it makes the combined issues of HY and XQC seem small, though once again that’s subjective. Nobody wins when people start this sort of competition.

My heart breaks for XQC but also - I am sorry - if/when HY x XQC hook up again (how? I have no idea! But that is one of the joys of Meatbun - I both have no idea how/where it’s going and utterly trust her), please have He Yu read up and learn things because Good God. You should not be in major pain the morning after unless you are into pain and XQC clearly is not!

The other thing is the bit about XQC forcing himself to walk in his usual ramrod-straight manner is the moment I went utterly gone for him. I mean, I liked him and found him interesting before. But this is the thing that flipped that invisible switch for me and I went rabid and irrational and now I am Team XQC and I don’t care what he wants and does from now on, he should have it. It’s so small but so real. My mother and her mother were both big on straight posture. And one of the reasons they gave was when you walk with good posture - you look confident but also it makes you feel confident and stronger. And I’ve actually found it to be true - when you throw your shoulders back and straighten your neck and hold your head up, it does not just give others a signal, it gives a signal to your own brain. So to see XQC insist on doing it, despite being emotionally and physically shattered - because of his pride refusing to give up, because he’s so unbending, but also this being some sort of instinctive armor, just hits straight through the heart.

OK, I laughed at HY as a fucking machine. But also, this is another point in the whole “everyone has issues” narrative and HY’s life could be worse. HY, with all his other issues, can pay an insane amount, an amount that XQC could not pay in a million years, so easily. It’s not even a blip to him. Hell, the fact that he forgot to pay speaks to that - I can see forgetting to pay a friend a couple of bucks back right away because it’s not much money. HY forgets because it does not loom in his mind. And this rich lifestyle is instinctive, is ingrained in him. I think he’d find it hard to be poor.

THAT is what he’s thinking about? Priorities are...

The sole good thing that came out of this insanity is that XQC is getting in touch with his emotions, even if those emotions are (rightly) rage. He’s too closed off from them normally.

The fact that you slept with a man should be secondary to the fact that you drugged and raped him, but here we are...

To me, this sums up He Yu as a moral wasteland. To still, when sober and past his fit and not under influence of wine, to still feel excitement over his revenge and to somehow twist it that it’s XQC’s fault for being raped by He Yu is !!!!!!!!!

(I suppose if I were charitable, I’d assume that the disquiet is small stirrings of almost dead conscience and his “he deserved it” is an attempt to justify the unjustifiable to himself, but I honestly don’t want to think so because I am so angry at him. Not until I see some more evidence. I don’t feel like being indulgent with He Yu since he’s indulgent with himself enough for two.)

1. The fact that you can tell from the picture XQC got taken by a man (I am gonna defer to Meatbun’s expertise here) definitely points to the fact that the pictures are going to be used for something bad later - because if it’s just oh XQC had sex, so what, he’s single what’s the big deal. But like this it becomes a different matter. No idea if it will be used for HY or XQC or both, and by whom (money is on Duan and co, but after the way HY went off, I would never say HY himself won’t use it badly somehow) but knowing Meatbun, it will go for maximum damage.

2. Ruthless? Perhaps. Unfeeling? Hmmmm. I am not He Yu’s biggest fan atm but that’s a wonderfully misleading adjective here. He does still seem to be in shock. And fixating.

3. The whole “hahahaha XQC is a hypocrite when he was all ‘I am not interested in sex’“ is - I am not sure if HY is just short-circuiting (fine) or using a rapist justification/rolling in a sea of toxic toxicity (not fine) because I am sorry, that’s totally like “he/she had a reaction, can’t be rape” writ large. Yeah, sure he had a reaction - you poured drugs down his throat. That has nothing to do with his default preferences or his actual state. THE FUCK?!

Anyway, we end on the whole “u mad bro?” bit and you know what strikes me? HY was all “I am done, we are done, my revenge is complete I don’t care” but here he is, still desperately seeking and craving reaction and interaction from XQC.

I remain utterly puzzled as to how these two will ever be a couple except for a couple being defined as “two mutually homicidal people.” Leaving aside everything else, I am willing to accept HY is in the closet - clearly whatever his orientation is, it includes men. But I do not get that sense from XQC at all. When he’s not drugged, he’s barely interested in sex with anyone and I do not get the sense he’s in the closet either. Chances of anyone, let alone He Yu, who is both a man and someone who raped him to humiliate him, being able to entice him into sexual encounters voluntarily is about the chance of me going to visit Mars. Meatbun loves doing insane things so I can’t wait.

PS I know people use the term psychopath all the time casually but ummm, I think He Yu may actually be one? When he has his father (!!!) on speakerphone, calmly carrying a conversation with the man as he’s raping his father’s friend in the club as he talks (!!!!!) that is...in RL I’d be “team lock him up for life, there is something so basic broken in him that it can’t be fixed.” Like - the hell? The ability to put things on different shelves so much is not in the same country as sane (it makes me think of 2ha and TXJ banging CWN being the curtain while performing court business but TXJ was bona fide clinically insane and also this is worse because this is his actual freaking father omg.) Of course, only time will tell whether it’s evidence of him being irreparably incapable of normalcy in terms of living in the world/interacting with others or it was an extreme psychotic (in casual parlance not medical one) break because most people are capable of truly horrific stuff if certain levers are pushed and his default is saner. It’s the question, isn’t it? Whether He Yu’s factory default setting is the monster of the previous chapters or the kid who’d cut his wrists so as not to hurt others.

Anyway, this novel is a terrifying roller coaster ride and I love having strong emotions.

[pwnyta]

I think the problem is that both Bakugo and Endeavor were good villains. At the very least, Todoroki’s dad was a REALLY good villain, because he was shown to abuse a literal 5 yo (I think?) child and he literally drove his wife to insanity (I don’t say that she is not to blame about what happened to Shoto, but at least I can understand that she wasn’t mentally well when she hurt her son).

I swear to god Horikoshi just stole this whole “number one hero that is loved by a lot of ppl and is considered a good guy turns about to be a deranged abuser in his normal life” bit from tiger and bunny and then just separated this one character into two (All Might and Endeavor).

Like I don’t say that it was a bad idea to do it, but at least COMMIT PLEASE.

Also, I will never get over the fact that Bakugo will never be called out on his bullshit, bc then it will be revealed to everyone that Deku was quirkless (after all that was one of the reasons why Midoriya was bullied). Baku can just say “sorry”, but still remain rude, loud and Obnoxious and this is fine, I guess?

Also, let me just say this. If the whole point of redemption of these two characters was to show that shitty people are rarely called out on their bullshit irl, that abusers live happily while their victims left to try and recover themselves, and just in general that life is unfair it would have been one thing. Like, you know, “the world keeps going even when you was wronged/hurt and you can’t do anything about it, learn to live with it and move on”. But the thing is. ITS NOT THE POINT. ITS JUST HORIKOSHI’S SHITTY WRITING. Ugh, I’m really angry :/

You know I think one of the reasons why I am so angry at Bakugo and Endeavor while I don’t really care about other villains as much is because:

1) they are heroes. They are supposed to be GOOD people or at least someone you wouldn’t want to stab in real life. But even though both of them want to be/ARE pro heroes they both do some VERY fucked up shit and don’t feel bad about… like, bro. Isn’t that… unhealthy? Where is your sympathy? Why do you want to be the literal representation of “good” in your world if you don’t even see that your actions are foul and villainous?

And 2) because it’s way easier to meet people like Bakugo and Enji irl than people like Dabi, Toga and Tomura. Like, sure, there are a lot of evil, deranged people out there, but for majority of us we will be lucky enough to NEVER meet an actual murderer/terrorist even once in our life. Bullies and domestic abusers, though? This shit is everywhere and you simply can’t ignore it. I’ve seen people, who, just like Deku, liked their bullies and thought of them as their friends and that was shitty, angering and heart breaking. I know people who were abused by their parents/partners. And that is exactly why I despise both of these characters so much. They are just too real, and at the beginning they are shown to be as great villains, but now author just tries to do every thing to excuse their past actions to the point of literally rewriting the story to help these characters to look less shitty. Like bro. BRO. Just stop.

Also, while I know that Bakugo not even half as bad as Enji (bc, you know… he didn’t abuse his wife and kids… YET lmao), but he was bullying Deku bc of his own big fat ego. He doesn’t even have any good reasons to be a bully like “oh he have a shitty home life” or some shot like this. He is the only child in the full family, I suppose that his family doesn’t struggle, he is also very popular with his peers and smart, I suppose (how can HE be smart is beyond me, but oh well…) and he also have a very strong quirk… in other words, he is just a spoiled, gross kid who is hypocritical to an unhealthy level, who lacks sympathy and doesn’t understand that his actions might have either killed or destroy someone’s life… our heroic Bakugo, everybody

Ooooof…. Sorry for a long rant, I’m just really really angry about it.

Yeah Shoto was 5... I remember this because I remember Rei crying after Endeavor punches him and saying 'hes only 5' and Endeavor responding with 'no hes already 5' and smacks her like I guess thats past the perfect time to punch your child so hard in the stomach they throw up...

Yeah with Rei Im not bothered at all with how she was handled in that moment because she clearly suffered some psychotic break when she attacked her son and then immediately appologized and tried to help... and she was punished for it. Which is a reasonable story bit... however Endeavors 'redemption/attonment' arc never included her... like he never went to see her that entire time and she had to come to him? Absolute garbage.

LMAO Oh yeah... the guys son was a blue fire guy too wasnt he? ... well hey now. His whole ordeal as a vigilante was an awful lot like Stains thing too who Dabi was inspired by.... now you might be onto something nonny! LMFAO

But YES Horikoshi has a hard time committing to anything he starts... even Stain looks a bit like a chump because of Horikoshi never following through with any corrupt heroes...

LMAO Dekus secret already did get out and no one said anything... I mean Bakugo DID technically apologize finally but hes still being an obnoxious ass even now because he can never change because hes the most popular character and his shitty personality is what people like (presumably).

Yeah its definitely not about reflecting any reality... not when all the important good guy characters whos opinions we should care about all dismiss Endeavors past even though they should have no say in it.

1- I actually dont mind the idea that heroes can be bad people... characters having different motivations for why they become heroes is fine money fame w/e... its fine... but its not written well.

Bakugo is the worst with this because he does want to be a hero but he never like reflects on how shitty his behavior is like when he set that bomb off in Dekus face or like how he doesnt seem bothered that Shiga and the crew think he'd make a good villain... if he really wanted to be a hero youd think he'd at least have some moments where he questioned the shitty things he does and tried to do better. But Horikoshi doesnt seem to want anyone (including Bakugo) to admit what a piece of shit Bakugo is so he can never grow from it and now its kind of too late so... just let him jump in front of a bullet and say sorry and continue to be a prick no questions asks... sure. W/e.

2. Yeah The LOV are a bit too cartoony(which is causing its own problems now that Hori is trying to make them seem deeper than they were Togas especially bad.) but Horikoshis writing with them hasnt been great either. Shiga gets some good shit but hes also a meat puppet for AFO so...

It makes sense to hate Bakugo and Endeavor because they feel more real... and they could have had a good story if Horikoshi wasnt so flaky in his writing.

GOD YES. Bakugo not even having a reason to be as shitty as he is really just adds to it... like at least Sasukes whole family was murdered... still a dick but at least in the beginning he was relatively understandable that he might not have been in the mood for bullshit around him.

Bakugo is just another shitty guy whos violent because things arent going exactly the way that he wanted, constantly inconvenienced that other people are living without him being the center of attention. So tragic.

HEY Im always open to bitching about BNHA... its great!

[sodasback]

The Kegger - For You Series

JJ Maybank x Allie Routledge (John B’s younger sister)

 Allie was sitting on a log next to some tourist, a good looking guy, who was obviously not in high school. JJ turned to look at them when Allie let out an exaggerated giggle at something dumb the tourist said and then he watched while the stupid touron’s hand started to move from it’s spot on her knee and up her bare thigh. JJ didn’t know it but he was crushing his beer can and clenched his jaw so loud that Pope and Kie noticed. 

“WOW! You are so jealous!” Kie said teasingly to JJ. 

“What?” JJ said pulled from his trance of imagining breaking the nose of the touron that had his hands on Allie. “Pfft! No! She’s like my little sister! I’m just being protective.” JJ defended. 

“Really? ‘Cause her actual brother barely cares.” Pope nodded towards John B. talking to some friends at the keg, completely not concerned with Allison and the guy flirting with her. 

“Please J, we all know you’ve always had a thing for Allie.” Kie said. 

“I do not! It’s Allie. I’d never do that to John B.” JJ said reminding himself more than trying to convince Pope and Kie.

“So if she wasn’t John B.’s little sister, you’d admit you’re in love with her?” 

JJ glared at the two of them before groaning. “I’m not talking to you guys anymore. I’m not in love with Allie!” He emphasized as he walked away. 

Pope and Kie smiled at each other, “So he’s totally head over heels for her right?” Pope asked.

“Oh 1000%” Kie agreed.

Allie saw JJ approach and shot him a glare knowing he was about to interrupt her and try to cock block this tourist, but he didn’t even glance at her, just squeezed in between Allie and the tourist on the log. 

“Dude, what the fuck?” the tourist asked, obviously pissed off at the interruption. 

“Oh. hey man! Sorry, didn’t see you there.” JJ said sarcastically, putting his arm around Allie’s shoulders, “did I interrupt you hitting on my 17 year old baby sister? ...yeah, dude, I know she’s a minor, so I feel like-” 

“This is your brother?” The tourist interrupted. 

“No! He’s not.” Allie said sharply, looking at JJ and pushing his muscly arm off of her, “He’s just jealous, but trying to pretend he’s being protective instead.”

JJ looked at her and smirked as he drank from his solo cup, obviously proud of himself and amused as the tourist looked confused and then sighed, fed up with the drama this was turning into. “Whatever” he said walking away.

“What the fuck JJ?!” Allie yelled at him as she stood up to face him still seated on the log. 

“Ya know, I feel like people are always saying that to me!” he chuckled sarcastically, but Allison was not amused, “What Allie?! Are you seriously mad at me for saving you from a hugely disappointing 5 minutes that doesn’t end with you in an orgasm?” He raised his eyebrows as he sipped his beer again. 

She just gaped at his bold statement. 

“And you know what Allie? I’m not jealous! You’re like my litter sister!” he scoffed. And JJ didn’t miss the flash of disappointment cross Allie’s face, which she failed to hide fast enough. 

He cocked his head to the side while the grin on his face grew. “Wait a damn minute! Was that disappointment I just saw? You want me to be jealous, don’t you?” He asked standing up and getting excited while Allie crossed her arms and put on her best poker face. “You want me to look at you as something other than a little sister, don’t you?!” he teased further as he looked down at her, trying to break her. 

“I don’t know JJ, do guys practically break their necks trying to check out their ‘little sister’s’ ass in a bikini?” she asked indignantly, using air quotes. 

“I never-” JJ smiled and shook his head, but she interrupted and leaned in next to his ear, “Or get hard watching me eat a popsicle?” 

And she saw JJ’s jaw drop a little and she pulled away from him, “Yeah. I knew you were watching me dumbass ...you really think that’s how I would normally eat a popsicle?”

JJ just closed his mouth and rolled his lips into each other knowing he lost this battle. “Later ...bro” Allie said walking away from him.

...

Allie continued to get a little drunk, because even though she was annoyed at JJ for cock-blocking her with the tourist, the fact that JJ might be jealous gave her all kinds of satisfaction, which only reminded her that she liked JJ way more than her brother’s best friend. And she had a feeling JJ knew this too, and yet, there he was along with John B entertaining a whole group of girls. JJ caught Allie scowling at him and he just gave her a smirk and a wink before going back to making his new-found groupies giggle. Allie rolled her eyes and downed another screwdriver. Then she had an idea. As immature and petty as it was, she decided 2 could play at this game. 

Allie grabbed the bag of cut-up limes, the tequila and the salt. She stood on top of the one giant wooden table someone had built and left down here at Boneyard party years ago. "Who wants to do body shots?!" She yelled. Immediately, a dozen boys and some eager girls surrounded the table. She didn't even look over to see if JJ had heard. Allie helped a girl lay on the table and after a guy licked some salt off her stomach, took a shot of some tequila and then took the lime out of her mouth.

"Hey, when is it your turn?" one of the hot tourists asked Allie. She smiled and hopped up on the table to lay down.

What Allie didn't see was John B and JJ exchanging admonishing glances. JJ shook his head and walked over to the table indicating he would handle it.

"Allie, what are you doing?" JJ asked, annoyed as he reached the table. She sat up leaning back on her elbows and narrowed her eyes at him.

"Why do you care JJ? You jealous?" She cruelly teased with an edge to her voice. JJ just glared at her, before looking away and shaking his head yet again at her antics, "Or you just don't want your 'little sister' acting like a whore?" she asked taking off her tank top and throwing it at him, before she poured salt in the cleavage revealed by her bikini top.

The tourist slightly pushed JJ out of the way as he bent down to lick it off her, but JJ shoved him hard before he could touch Allie. Then JJ grabbed Allie's arm and pulled her off the table. "Come on!" He said dragging her through the party.

Allie chuckled darkly as she struggled to keep up, "This whole jealous toxic masculinity doesn't look good on you, just fyi." But JJ ignored her, pulling her to a secluded area. Allie had to admit though, this was her plan all along and even though it definitely was not a healthy way to get JJ’s attention, she couldn’t lie and say she wasn’t actually super turned on by what was happening.

"What JJ?! What?! You came in like the bad big brother and pulled me away! Now what?"

"What is wrong with you Allie?! Letting random guys do body shots off of you?! You were about to let that guy lick your tits?! What the fuck?! You think that's cool to get wasted and let guys just take advantage of you?"

"First of all, I'm not fucking wasted! Secondly, they aren't taking advantage if I'm consenting to it dumbass. And three, it's frickin harmless! It's not like I'm fucking random tourists every weekend!" She threw at him.

JJ stared at her angrily with a furrow in his brow for a minute. "Yeah?! What was that earlier tonight then, huh?! Were you not gonna go home with that fucking touron if I hadn't interrupted?"

"Okay, so my one time versus your dozens of girls?!" She threw her hands out as they continued yelling at each other.

"Why do you think I do that Allie?! Huh?! Why do you think I hookup with random girls?"

She looked at him confused. "What the fuck, JJ?" she muttered, "Because you're a fucking horny teenage fuckboy? How am I supposed to know?!"

"You ever think it's because I can’t be with the girl I want to be with ...because she’s my best friend’s little sister? And everyone on this island knows I’m no good for her?! So yeah, I sleep with random girls, smoke all day, get in fights and just, in general, be a fuck up, because I might as well live up to everyone’s expectations of me, right? ...If I can’t have the one girl I’ve been in love with since we were kids, then what’s the point of trying to be better?” He finished, shrugging and staring at her, furrow in his brow still present.

Allie stayed quiet for a second, as the tension in her face relaxed at the realization that JJ was actually admitting feelings for her and then returning as she heard what JJ thought of himself.

“Whatever, just forget it okay?” He muttered and started to walk past her. 

“JJ, wait!” She called after him.

He stopped, but didn’t turn around yet, just let out a sigh, “What Allie?” He asked tiredly and started to turn around. Allie walked up to him and crashed her lips on his. No softness or gentleness about it, just 11 years of pining after one another sparking a fire that ignited when their lips touched. JJ’s arms instantly around Allie’s waist, pulling her as close as possible. Her hands on his cheek and neck, fingers snaking through his hair. 

They pulled apart, breathing heavy, foreheads pressed together. “I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember JJ Maybank.” She whispered. He searched her face for a second making sure this was real before kissing her again. 

As much as Allie never wanted to stop kissing JJ, she also had something important to tell him, so she pulled away and held his face in her hands. “You might think you’re a fuck-up. But I think you’re charming and ...and fucking electric and insanely smart and fiercely loyal. You are the most amazing guy with the biggest heart and if you ever talk that way about my JJ again, I’ll have to kick your ass.”

“Oh, I’m your JJ now, huh?” he smirked.

“Damn straight ...always have been.” She smirked back before kissing again.

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