#this is so funny!!!

[nashishishi]

idk how to explain to people that the reason i haven't been online much is because the school i go to has barely any signal and the home i live in currently also doesn't really have any good signal and there is/was a typhoon passing through the country so it made the signal problem worse, so the only time i could get signal was when i went out on the weekends, but there's been a shit ton of smog in my area recently, either from the abnormally active volcano nearby or from the horrible pollution, both of which render the air quality unhealthy, meaning i get sick more easily because i'm either inhaling sulfur dioxide from the ashfall OR i'm inhaling sulfur dioxide from the pollution, meaning i'm stuck inside my house with horrible signal for most of the day

and the typhoon that is/was passing through the country means that it's also been raining quite a bit recently, and rain + sulfur dioxide = acid rain, meaning i REALLY can't go outside, meaning no signal for me. ever.

also, even when i Can go outside, it's usually just to run errands. obviously it's not advised to go outside if it's not necessary, so i only ever go out when i need to do my groceries or something like that, which means the only time i can get signal is also the one and only time in the entire week when all i do for 2 hours is cross a bunch of streets, run down supermarket aisles, try not to let my wallet get stolen, and then walk back home. none of which are activities that i can do while also diverting part of my attention to scrolling or messaging on my phone

so yk like if i could explain all that in like 1 or 2 sentences that would be great. it's just that if i say "the whole goddamn country (including me) is in a crisis rn srry" and it hasn't reached world news yet, it almost sounds like a non-issue (or just a straight-up lie) if i use it as an excuse

[candyheartedchy]

Just listened to a recent Dana Snyder interview and this part regarding him picking up his daughter at school cracked me up:

"ARE YOU VIVIAN’S DAD?!"

"YEAH!"

"ARE YOU A CARTOONIST?!"

"Sort of, I do voices for cartoons."

"WHAT CARTOONS?!"

"You know Molly McGee?"

"Mmm…"

You know Scratch?"

"Mmm…."

"I voice Scratch!"

"No you don’t!"

**kid walks away**

OMG!!!

That kid clearly didn’t know they were talking to a LEGEND!!!

[calocera]

my pet mold spore

[climbingthefloors]

obsessed with this baby hippo from thailand's khao khew zoo.. she has been so utterly betrayed by the world

[sadclowncentral]

nearly had a medical emergency today because - and i cannot stress enough how little i am making this up - a helicopter landed in front of an open grain silo while i was getting off my ship and i am deathly allergic to the wheat that said helicopters rotor blades proceeded to blast in my face at full force. the cosmic forces are plotting against me ass situation to be in

[noctude]

maybe i shouldn’t respond to wrong number texts any more

[atompalace-official]

….well, she’s got the spirit!

[knifefightscene]

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Knowledge Revenge.

[stemmmm]

bad youtube clickbait thumbnail that reads "I think I just had a therapy session with a DEMON???"

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[ladamania]

Twitter still producing bangers on occasion

[wilted]

help

[steveharrington]

redownloaded instagram and got sucked into reels and it’s truly like an alternate reality happening over there. video of a girl being like “looking back on my cringe 2021 taste….” and it’s a pic of her wearing like. jeans and a top. the top has a checkerboard pattern. she’s like screaming in agony. the comments are all like “omg not the microtrend 😭 i can’t believe i ever wore that” like woah. i think you guys are crazy

[cutiemisu]

ryoko kui: bet

[chessb0r3d]

Analysis so bad you don't even know what it's talking about anymore.