#this is probably one of my most loser man posts but i had to get this all off my chest. let me have this mojment of weakness
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Your first point is pedantic, do you really think anyone wants to see themselves as losers? Especially men, who value sex a ton, coming to terms that they can't get it? If a man calls himself an incel he most likely is "involuntarily celibate." He doesn't need to be knocking on every women's doors to prove it.
The point is an incel can barely get a positive interaction with women. Remember I was in the break room at work, I was flipping through tv channels. And one of my female coworkers started to talk to me about tv, and we had this pleasant exchange talking about tv. And it stood out to me because it was an interaction with a women that seemed pleasant and wasn't forced. Remember there was this blackpilled incel youtuber, Chewy, and he said he had this constant dream that made him happy. He said it was a dream where he was talking to this woman and he made a joke that made her smile. If that's the highlight of your day it's over.
Dating apps are the easiest way to tell whether you're an incel because they are apps meant for finding a partner. Everyone on the app is there to meet someone to date. Yet, incels can't even get a lowly right swipe. I'm not even talking about getting a date, they can't even get a consideration for the date. Think about all the women who saw an incels profile, probably in the thousands and not one gave him a consideration. Do you need to go up to 1000 women in real life to be considered an incel, in your eyes? Do online rejections not count?
I myself am not really "negative," but that doesn't matter because my "personality" isn't the issue. But do you think most hateful , negative incels express their "negative personality" publicly? Incels post often that they don't let their "based views" be known to normies.
And autistic men are still the minority in the incelsphere. So what do these autistic and neurotypical incels have in common? Subpar looks.
How can we know for sure that 80% of men have sex yearly? Again, men don't want to admit that they are sexual failures. They can be lying. If you started to go up to random men and ask them "can I see a picture of your girlfriend/ wife in your phone?" They would not pull up a picture, because they don't got one. You must have male relatives. A brother perhaps, or cousins. How often do you see them with women?
Kindness, intelligence, and humor overcoming looks is a lie. Don't trust any of those "studies." Incels have been doing tinder experiments for like 10 years now where they have a male model as the profile and their bio states that they're pedophilic violent felons and not only do they get matches, they actually get conversations from women. The women will overlook what they supposedly did. I know of tom Morgan, despite him being noticably autistic he still has many suitors on his YouTube videos, because he's good looking. Do you know of Clavicular? He's a mod on looksmax.org, went viral for his bone smashing. This guy is noticably autistic, he's clinically diagnosed too, he does a lot to looksmax. Meme stuff like mewing and bone smashing, but serious stuff too like fillers, steroids, tret, lifts, and a myriad of other drugs. He's a pretty good looking guy now, but he's also a pretty cruel and self absorbed guy. He posts about and insults the women he sleeps with, which he has proof of with pics and videos. He said he was going to bully his subhuman roommate. He takes vids of himself mogging and insulting other men to show people how superior he is. And all of this while being very visibility autistic. Why does he get women? He's good looking. There's no running from the importance of looks when it comes to men dating women.
There's a lot of to the blackpill, yes, incels got a bad hand. But their bad hand was in the looks department, not the "personality." The help they need to escape inceldom is cosmetic surgery, they need face transplants and leg lengthening . Outside of that I encourage incels to focus on whatever they find satisfying. No need to be doom and gloom always . I'm going to be 30 this year, been in the incelsphere for nearly 10 years. Thought I was different, that I wasn't an incel and was going to get a girlfriend soon. Unfortunately, I was wrong. I don't think self proclaimed incels are late bloomers, they understand their condition.
Testing a male bullshit story #1
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see ok. aroace crowley is like this has active blessings from the writer as crowley was written to represent a vague concept of queer identity rather than just one single thing and you can read him as anything as long as it's not cishet. aroace ten is like this absolutely doesn't have blessings from the writer but i truly do not care because if they didn't want me believing in it they wouldn't have written him and donna Like That or have him do things strangely relatable to my own aspec experiences. aroace hardy is like this would have a net zero impact on what his character is if you believed in this but you absolutely could because the show would become 30% funnier. i think chibnall should get his blessings from me
#this is probably one of my most loser man posts but i had to get this all off my chest. let me have this mojment of weakness#out of all of these i truth for aroace ten the hardest which is to say something is wrong with me#good omens#dr who#broadchurch#aroace#crowley#tenth doctor#alec hardy#aspec doc tag#10 era
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touya todoroki headcanons bc im in love with this man
have i finished watching mha? no. does that stop me from writing about dabi? no <3
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touya todoroki who once decided to dye his hair red and immediately regretted it. he dyed it black again after enji took thousands of photos of him
touya todoroki who askes you to name 5 songs after he saw you wearing band tshirt
touya todoroki who tells his siblings they’re adopted or were found in the trash
touya todoroki who always goes to fuyumi for love advice bc he’s a total loser
touya todoroki who loves underground midwest emo bands and thinks his music taste is superior (its not)
touya todoroki who’s still unemployed and lives with his parents
touya todoroki who told you that he’s in lesbians with you
touya todoroki who always cheats when they’re having a family game night
touya todoroki who sags his pants
touya todoroki who only wears beat up converse and dr martens (i can also see him having new rocks)
touya todoroki who plays bass
touya todoroki who pierced his nose himself after rei told him he can’t has piercings
touya todoroki who often skateboards with keigo
touya todoroki who plays every male manipulator game with his online friends (mostly with shiggy tho)
touya todoroki who definitely uses dabi as his nickname (he thinks he’s soo cool)
touya todoroki who’s a momma’s boy
touya todoroki who is a spit image of enji
touya todoroki who’s the most stereotypical male manipulator ever
touya todoroki who definitely had an opium phase (keigo uses his photos form that era to blackmail him lmao)
touya todoroki who manspreads all the time (he literally can’t seat normally)
touya todoroki who never saw a brush
touya todoroki who has minecraft server with his siblings
touya todoroki who listens to lil peep
touya todoroki who uses tiktok brainrot with natsuo daily (rei is tired of them)
touya todoroki who steals rei’s eye pencil
touya todoroki who’s your passanger princess
touya todoroki who wears his clothes as long as they pass the sniff test
touya todoroki who knows his hogwart house, greek god parent, mbti, birth chart and which type of bread he is
touya todoroki who gets offended if you don’t answer his tiktoks but won’t answer yours for weeks
touya todoroki who never wears matching socks
touya todoroki who can’t solve math problems for shit but will explain the entire plot of evangelion to you
touya todoroki who dated one or two girls before you and they both dumped him
touya todoroki who’s love language is annoying everyone around him
touya todoroki who consumed every media you ever mentioned
touya todoroki who wears every single bracelet fuyumi, natsuo and shoto made for him
touya todoroki who gives you flowers he stole from rei’s garden
touya todoroki who will come up to you and give you a rock bc it reminds him of you
touya todoroki who’s your trained photographer <3
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this is probably very ooc but im projecting. i need a man like him so bad its not even funny anymore
and hes very scott pilgrim/rodrick heffley coded. watch him fight your seven evil exes and cover baby for you <3
sorry for any mistakes my god why is posting so stressful lmao i literally feel like i made so many grammar mistakes 🔥🔥
btw if you know downtown mtv then theres this one scene where alex takes serena’s photos at the graveyard this is literally you and touya frfr
#touya todoroki#dabi#dabi todoroki#mha dabi#bnha dabi#touya todoroki x reader#touya todoroki headcanons#dabi x reader#dabi headcanons#mha#bnha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia
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Yan classmates kink list.
What are these greasy guys into?
Rated 18 + — mature short content !
Kink list with links for every single one of my characters!
Submissive to Switch to more of the Dominant Characters! I will update this as I go post more fics!
Submissive
“Kenny” | Kendrick
If you really want a submissive guy, he’s your man. Well he’s your husband really. He’s afraid to talk back to his wife, and he does everything around the house. He stays at home, cooking, cleaning, and taking care of the kids. In a AU where women rule the world and men go to The Husband Program to learn to be good husbands, being submissive comes naturally to him. He can be a bit mischievous and a rebel, especially when he was young, but a good little humiliation will put him back into place. So, I guess he’s a masochist.
Loves to eat you out, and likes to be praised afterwards.
Favorite sex position might just be when you’re sitting on his face. Or the classic missionary.
Hes pretty vanilla since men are taught to be more modest.
Dumb Yandere
Most ditsy and dumb man you have ever met. He is a weird ass pervert too. You catch him sniffing and licking the crotch area of your pants and underwear before.
Would bury his face into your behind and lick whatever he could.
Loves compliments and rewards.
He does get scared easily so anything with whips and binds is terrifying.
He doesn't like any position where he cant see you.
Perverted Yandere coming soon!
Yandere Prodigy
He is definitely more on the submissive side. He pretends that he hates you and that he’s cold hearted, but the moment you touch him he melts.
He would be a bit bratty and talk back at you.
Is the type to get a nosebleed at the sight of your bare skin.
He would definitely want to hear your praises, and how much you love listening him play violin.
favorite position might be anything that has him on the bottom.
Yandere Neighbor
He’s done everything to be close to you, and he even bought the space next door to your apartment. He loves to be choked, ordered around, spanked, will love it if you rode him, and he’ll go anything really. He’s the most dedicated man I’ve ever written for the readers.
He would fuck you anywhere. I mean he literally masturbated and licked your door knob for gratification.
Phone sex ? The type to hit you up with a message saying: "What are you wearing?" at 3 am.
Favorite sex position maybe doing it while standing up. He can hold you close and press you against the wall.
Yandere Best Friend
He’s quite new to sex so he doesn’t know much. But he does have a praise kink, and loves it when you call him a “good boy.”
I’m sure he would love to have you teach him new things, and would be pretty open minded, so an experimentalist.
Favorite sex position is probably cow girl or reverse cow girl.
Yandere Survivor
He cut his dick off for you to eat, I mean damn. He sacrificed his whole life because he wanted your attention to be solely on him. Before the apocalypse, he did have the occasional hook ups. He would mostly be a bottom and let people do their thang on him.
Most likely to call you “master” or “mistress”
Before the apocalypse he has had his fair share of hookups, and would occasionally love to bite on ears.
He'll be your pet if you want him to be.
Switch
Yandere Mothman
A possessive man that becomes putty in your hands. He sees you as his mate and life partner.
Overall, he's pretty submissive. He does take over when the mating season comes around. The mating process takes several hours.
Yandere Boyfriend
He’s literally a damn loser. He steals your cups, your underwear, and he would follow you around the world. He likes to have his hair pulled, or pull your hair.
He is pretty vocal during sex and would like to hear you too.
Choke him !
Loves to beg and loves for you to beg him
Loves it when you ride him or are just desperate for him as he is for you. but his fave sex position is doing it from the side, or missionary.
Would probably dress up as anything for you.
Yandere “Blood bag”
Has a knife kink and blood fetish.
He likes to mark his lovers, and bite down on their shoulder as he cums.
He would love it if you drank all of his blood and leave him almost to the brink of death.
Has fantasies of you using him just for his body.
Yandere Yearbook guy
All he needs is a photograph of you. Which he has plenty of.
Savior complex? the thought of you all hopeless or stuck somewhere- you know he’s just going to take advantage of that.
Loves to trigger your senses, and he would drip melted candle wax on you or please you with an ice cube
Pegging is fine with him too. As long as you know what you’re doing.
Favorite position: 69 or missionary with one leg over his shoulder
Yandere Professor
Your professor has an oral fixation for sure. He would stick his fingers into you after they’ve been soaked in your essence, and shove it down your throat.
Has a thing for when you call him “sir” or “professor”
Would have you bend over and spread your legs wide for him, and he’s an adrenaline junkie so would fuck you in public just for fun.
Car sex.
Yandere Knight
He's not a degrader. I mean, he would be mortified to call you a slut or whore. He also likes to play a little hard to get.
Hes a switch. He submits to you because you're a literal royal, and he'll submit to you in bed. He is close to being a dominant, and only submits to people he truly likes.
He does enjoy some good vanilla sex and missionary.
Hes a worshipper, and will compliment you while he is intimate with you.
Dominant
Yandere Farmer
The sweetest guy you will ever meet. He does like to fuck you in front of other people, especially his buddies. He'll tie you up and have you on display. It absolutely pisses him off if people dare to actually touch you though.
He calls you his toy.
His compliments are calling you his sweetest slut.
Yandere Chaebol
Your boss is into your little maid outfit he gave you. And he realized he just likes role play. He also loves to make you crawl to him, and pull you around on a leash.
Loves to sneak around and would probably have threesomes if he could.
He would love to see you sprawled out on his desk.
Yandere Stalker
Would love it if he could just have his way with you.
Blood kink. Like he'll go down on you if you're on your period.
If he were to be a submissive, he would be the brattiest brat you have ever seen. He loves to feel in power and in control.
Would be the type of guy to make a goal to try every position in a single night.
Yandere Husband
Would be into bondage: tying you onto the bed, and trying your limbs together so you can’t move.
A bit of a sadist, and a brat tamer.
Breeding kink. He is also very touchy and physical touch is his love language.
So favorite position might be the mating press. And he also likes to fuck you in front of a mirror.
Calling him "daddy" will give him an ick. He's a literal dad and it feels wrong to hear it be said in an intimate context.
Yandere Dad’s Best Friend
Exhibitonist. I mean he did fuck you outside during the fourth of July block party.
Is into cock warming and just being close to you.
Squirting. And also dumping his load on your face after you give him a blowjob.
Slapping and spanking.
Would bend you over whenever he could.
Yandere Prince
He is more of the ruthless type. He's a dominant and a major degrader.
Hes a sadist, and if he were to partake in any sexual activity, he would like to be the master or owner.
Hes a rigger and likes to tie his partners up.
Him actually fucking you would be pretty rare. If you do get on his nerves, and manage to get him pretty riled up, you'll be dicked down in no time.
Ruining you is his favorite activity.
#Allurilove asks#male yandere#smut writing#yandere x reader#tw yandere#yandere x you#yandere oc#yandere x y/n#yandere imagines#yandere best friend#yandere classmate (yearbook guy)#yandere classmate x you#yandere drabble#yandere writing#yandere#yandere x darling#fave sex positions#yandere smut#smutty smut smut#dads bestfriend x yandere reader#older man younger woman#praise k!nk#yandere prodigy x rival you#yandere prince x you#yandere Farmer x you#dumb yandere x you#yandere knight x you
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streamer!ellie headcanons
warnings: yo no se
content : streamer!ellie headcanons 🔥🔥
authors note : the streets r calling and they’re telling me to write streamer ellie hcs….
- def started off as a faceless streamer. she wasn’t really comfortable on camera, and she just thought it would be way easier. you can only see her shoulders-down leaving her (deliciosu. scrumptious. yummy) arms in the cameras view.
- her twitch user is “creeperewman” cuz shes like…discreetly hiding her initials and referencing the best minecraft parody ever 😕!!!
- bought the most random shitty mic and webcam and started streaming 🔥🔥 she never got rid of either of them its part of her odd loser charm
“‘fartmaster69:it’s probably cuz your camera’ it’s probably bc of YOUR CAMERA!!! theres nothing wrong w my camera bro 😞”
“don’t listen to them…ur perfect 🤫 IM NOT TALKING TO U GUYS IM TALKING TO MY CAMERA”
- only had a few viewers the first couple times she streamed, and it was some random 10 yr old who kept spamming “yassss” in the chat and some dude who said she was shit at minecraft 😞 he was LYING
- started off doing minecraft speed runs (or trying to) and got like way good over time
- she randomly started getting more and more viewers, because people kept posting abt her and calling her fine on tiktok , making edits of her hands and her voice 😭😭 (real)
- as she got more and more viewers, she started branching out more with the games she’d play. def loves shooter games like cod and pubg, but she’d also play like indie horror games like faith (omg markiplier fans would know)
- she has a orange cat she named garfield (cuz…of course she does) and he’s always sitting on her lap during her streams or messing w her setup 💔💔
- def put stickers all over her headset and showed them off all proud on stream
- designed her own cute banners and stuff for streams 😞!!!
- def had a subreddit/disc server with her viewers where she’d let them give her game recs or make memes of her
- ppl saw her guitar in the back of her streams and BEGGED HER to play it and she had her own lil concert stream !!! she was so freaking nervous and messed up a bunch the first like minute or two but like after that she was in the ZONE
“‘ewswife: i wish i was that guitar’ oh!! you guys are so…kind!!!”
- when she INSANELY hit 1k, she did a face reveal and she hit 10k the same day 😦 the amount of edits that ppl made was actually insane. ESP ONES MAKING FUN OF DREAMS FACE REVEALLLL
- started doing much more random shit on stream after she got more famous. she LOVES cooking on stream, and she’d start reacting to random shit ppl sent her on the subreddit
- she cut her hair on stream once, and everyone in the chat kept spamming “yo bob…is fye” for like 5 minutes 😪
- “you’re at work watching me? i hope you get fired. i mean. i hope you don’t get fired 😞”
- she gets so many thirst comments and like…is terrible at responding to them
“‘ewleftbicep: you look so vulnerable today’ WHAT”
- she has her own apartment cuz of her awesome streaming money 🔥🔥🔥 soundproofed walls too cuz she’s. loud.
- one day, you were walking on campus to a class. you had your headphones on, listening to your main playlist on shuffle, when you got stopped by someone. you pulled your headphones off your ears and gave the man in front of you a confused look. you looked down to his hands, holding a tiny mic, and another dude holding a camera.
“what song are you listening to?” he held the microphone towards you, awaiting your response.
you quickly responded “uhm, last goodbye, by jeff buckley.” and stood there awkwardly, pushing a piece of hair out of your face.
the man quickly thanked you and you walked away, slightly suprised.
- after a couple hours, the video had blown up and the comments were filled with people complimenting you.
pickleluna: jeff buckley girl is so fine
minyonlala: 3rd girl is so bad
rilakkila: I NEED JEFF BUCKLEY GIRL
and unknown to you, someone else found you on their fyp.
creeperewman: guys what is the 3rd girls @. im literally BEGGING BRO PLEASEEE
- ewleftbicep: BEING DESPERATE ON MAIN IS CRAZY
- ewsgirlf: random tiktok girl stole my wife 💔
- elliewilliamsidechick: guys im literally the 3rd girl 😂😂😂
- it didn’t take long for your phone to be blown up with people sending you the video, tagging you in funny comments, and finding your instagram. you watched the video, and saw ellie was the top comment. you checked her profile, and saw how FINE she was, and immediately responded
- y/nmainn: guys 😳😳😳 what if i was the third girl 😳😳
- ellie checked her phone and saw thousands of people tagging your comment, and she wasted zero time following you on tiktok. and your instagram. its not stalking if its in your bio, right?
- you two immediately hit it off, and ellie loved the fact that you had absolutely no idea who she was. to you, she was just some hot girl. not some famous streamer you were obsessed with.
- she didn’t even realize you two went to the same school until she saw you in her astrophysics class one day, and she almost had a heart attack when you waved at her and walked over to sit next to her.
“what a coincidence.”
- she took you out on your first date to a planetarium, and not even a week after, asked you to be her girlfriend.
- she definitely teaches you how to play her favorite games. but she gets wayyyy defensive when you beat her.
“im just letting you win.”
“beginners luck.”
but shes SO COCKY when she beats you
“hey, don’t be so hard on yourself after this. not your fault im a professional!”
“aw, maybe one day you’ll be as good as me”
- definitely helps you build your own pc.
- loves watching you play things like animal crossing or stardew valley, always lays on your shoulder while you’re on the couch.
“why are you being so mean to gaston :((“
“because hes UGLY and he has an ugly house and he’s ruining my village.”
“wowww you’re bullying a little bunny man because he doesn’t fit your aesthetic 😒 so mean”
- if you like more aggressive games like cod, she loves listening to you talk shit while you play and always makes fun of people with you. (she thinks its hot when you’re mean to people)
- her chat absolutely loves you, and every time you stream together its a continuous stream of “me and who” and “when is it my turn 😪”
#ellie williams x reader#streamer!ellie#ellie williams x you#ellie x reader#ellie x y/n#ellie x you#ellie tlou#ellie the last of us#ellie williams tlou#ellie williams the last of us#ellie williams fluff#ellie williams fanfic#ellie williams headcanons#tlou#tlou part 2#the last of us#the last of us part 2#tlou fic#tlou fanfiction#tlou headcanons#tlou x reader
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mama, a stray kid behind YOU ★ @seunghyunjigglers
ot8 skz members as brainrot memes!
author's note: we even included links for some of the less chronically online divas out there (generous much?)! a lot of thought and effort went into this and we hope you love and appreciate our firstborn child. tw: dark humor. betas, do not interact!
chan ★ "i'm the leader, i'm the alpha, i'm the one to trust"
unironically watches bad edits of himself and goes "ayeee" to hype himself up about being edited
comments under them on his secret account
his fyp is now most definitely infiltrated by alpha chan edits
let's be real the whole trend was probably what inspired wolfgang to be released
bites his lip bc he thinks it makes him look sexy and he just looks like he's eating his bottom lip
tries to do that thing where guys put their necklace between their lips and take pics to be sexy but the necklace falls down his throat and he starts choking
would deliberately start doing aegyo followed by serving face to show his 'duality' since apparently the fandom love it (poor guy doesn't understand irony still)
LOVES when stays talk about his gyatt and starts using it bc he thinks its just another normal word for ass and seungmin and felix almost throw up laughing at him
minho ★ "queen never cry"
genuinely thought 'lock in' was something to be taken seriously and does NOT take it lightly when chan tells everyone to lock in
his kinky ass also probably thought it was some kind of jail roleplay (jisung had to explain it to him)
has mewing competitions with himself in the mirror
makes 'minho never CRY 💜' the note on his alarm in the morning
thinks it’s funny when he recommends the ki sisters manga (where the meme comes from) to people as his favorite series and the poor author has to actually go on a talk show cause he blew it up with the internet
checks his notifications EVERY day hoping someone will edit him with that baby
accidentally comments “queen NEVER cry” under a sentimental skz edit on the official account and wakes up with several calls from his managers.. let’s just say it didn’t go over well
changbin ★ "gadagadegadagadao" (omega nugget)
he stumbled across this meme on felix's fyp one evening and thought it would make the best vocal warmup for his raps, didn't realise it was a joke and actually uses it before recording tracks
when he discovers its a meme he thinks its hilarious and makes it his whole personality
stops mid convo with people and makes the face and thinks he's so funny (everyone is tired of it)
orders mcdonald's for everyone and takes the time to draw the face on EVERY chicken nugget and couldn't be prouder of himself
genuinely thinks the song is an actual banger and has it saved as a sample for a potential title track
hyunjin ★ "donatella VERSACE"
only types like THIS 💜 and felix and seungmin are the only ones who get it
chan finds out and secretly changes his name in a groupchat with their managers and staff to "hwang HYUNJIN 💜"
he is tired but donatella is not
his gag christmas present for secret santa is boxers with ms versace herself covering his chocolate starfish and he has a wardrobe malfunction while wearing them at a show and EVERYONE sees
is actually really embarrassed when he has to explain what it means to her and she just nods and tries to smile with all her botox
after this she comments it on all her posts and he accepts that he’s never escaping it
jisung ★ "jiafei 'in my head' remix" (floptropica)
this man is always singing his lungs out in every skz code and somewhere along the way he saw an edit of him with jiafei's vocals in the bg
was actually impressed by her vocal skills and tried to hunt down her ig page, ends up on some fake floptropican fanpage but he doesn't know this because he has minimal survival skills
dms some loser message like "wow your voice is sooooo nice haha...i also like to sing lol...so do you like korean boys haha..."
owner of the jiafei fan account is a stay and thinks this is hilarious and catfishes the hell out of him for WEEKS, sends vocal edits and jisung unironically eats them up, he def sends back vms of him doing vocal covers to impress her
felix hears him singing a jiafei remix one day and almost shits himself laughing, jisung gets angry and defensive until felix reveals that jiafei is literally a meme
realises he's been catfished
blocks the account and gets sulky whenever any floptropican edit pops up on his fyp, but still sings the jiafei remixes quietly to himself (some habits are hard to break)
felix ★ "oi oi oi...baka" (freaky larvae)
recreates it and everyone takes it seriously and he has to make a video telling everyone it was not in fact a thirst trap
breaks up serious arguments like "we need to calm down...you're all being a bunch of...heh...bakas..."
searches it up one day to see if there's any other lore and accidentally discovers a yagami yato audio and gets traumatised
seungmin gets fed up by felix constantly repeating it so he comes up with a master plan and during one of their japan concerts says "oh, felix has been practicing his japanese lately...what's that thing you keep saying?"
i feel like he'd perfect that freaky expression and everyone is sick of him and changbin for randomly using them
picks larva on his turn to choose something for movie night and everyone comically (see what i did there) groans and gets up while he’s just there cracking up
seungmin ★ "saddam hussein hiding spot"
this guy saw a 'saddam hussein hiding spot' comment under jeongin's post and fell down the rabbithole (or rather, the entrance covered in bricks and rubble)
thinks its HILARIOUS because it's a historically accurate meme (nerd!)
definitely whispers it every single time he sees someone or something laying down and everyone is so fed up with it, also gets felix to do the voice since he can imitate it perfectly
uses it as an excuse to randomly start lying down during dance practices and when everyone complains he just says "why am i lowkey serving saddama hussein hiding spot?"
he'd take this shi so seriously like he'd be doing the math to figure out how much time to spend on each app each day so he can make his daily screen time average look like saddam hussein JUST to make the reference
jeongin ★ "that feeling when knee surgery is tomorrow"
someone makes a comment about how they tore their acl and have to get knee surgery and he goes "that feeling when knee surgery is tomorrow" and starts laughing
it wasn't very funny to said someone
probably has to make one of those formal instagram apology posts because of it (he sets the music as the bg for the original post but his manager makes him delete it and post again)
fake falls at practice and when everyone crowds around him all worried he says he feels like he might need knee surgery tomorrow and gets kicked out of the room
pays an insane amount of money to get everyone matching knee surgery knee pads for practice and absolutely loses it every time someone actually needs to use it and has no other choice
posts a fake hospital pic with “do NOT get your knee surgery from shein !!” on his secret account
asks for permission to change his pfp to the grinch and considers outing jyp when he gets told no
#skz#skz imagines#stray kids#skz smut#stray kids smut#bangchan#lee know#changbin#hyunjin#han jisung#lee felix#seungmin#jeongin#stray kids headcanons#skz headcanons#skz fic#skz x reader#skz x you#stray kids x reader#stray kids scenarios#skz scenarios#skz imagine#stay kids imagines#skz kpop#skz meme#stray kids meme#skz memes#stray kids x you#stray kids ot8#skz ot8
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No longer a Spider, finally a Man
**Hey! First time doing a fanfic muscle growth. Or at least posting it. I hope you guys like it! Please tell me how I can do better, and send in story suggestions if you want!**
Peter Parker loved being Spider-Man. He loved saving people, he loved using his powers to make a difference, he loved swinging through the sky line. But he also hated it. He hated the pressure, the responsibility, the fact that he nd his loved ones were in constant danger, the fact that he was always lying to everyone. He hated that he could never be normal. But then again Peter had never been very normal. Even before becoming Spider-man he had been a nerd. Smart, socially awkward, and tormented by the popular kids. That didn’t exactly change after becoming Spider-Man either, though his social issues had definitely gone to the back burner with him constantly fighting crime. If he was being honest his social life had only gotten worse since becoming a superhero. He had gained some muscle and no longer needed glasses, yes, but he couldn’t exactly show that. He hadn’t had time for his friends, his normally fantastic grades were slipping, and Flashes bullying had only gotten worse.
As Peter, out of costume, walked to Midtown, he wondered what it would be like to be a normal teenager. Not just what it would be like to not be Spider-Man, but to not be a nerd. He wondered what it would be like to be a regular teenage boy. Maybe if he wasn’t Spider-Man he could have even been… cool or something. Probably not, but it was still a nice fantasy. Just as he was imagining this, his spider-sense went off. He looked around, prepared to jump out of the way of any danger, but, even with his super reflexes, he couldn’t get out of the way before the strange something hit him right in the middle of his chest. Peter stumbled back, not realizing that the reality stone, one of the infinity stones, had lodged itself inside of his heart. Normally such a thing would kill someone, or at least hurt them, but due to the magic nature of the stone it phased through his chest and inside of him without harming him. Peter blinked. What… just happened? He had sworn something had just flown into his chest but… wouldn’t that have killed him or something? Before he could investigate further, an alarm on his phone began to ring. Crap, he was late for class! Peter ran into the school as the power of the reality stone seeped into his blood. He turned a corner, just a hallway away from his classroom, when he almost ran straight into a wall of muscle, his super-reflexes being the only thing that saved him. As he skirted to a halt, he came face to face with his biggest tormentor (supervillains and news editors notwithstanding) : Flash Thompson. The most popular jock in school and Peter Parker's personal bully. The blond quarterback sneered cockily at Peter before he spoke
“Hey there Puny Parker. Running late again? I thought geeks like you were supposed to be punctual and shit?” Flash said with a cocky mocking laugh.
“What do you want, Flash?” Peter asked with a scowl, trying to keep his patience.
“Just checking up on my favorite nerd.” Flash mocked, grabbing Peter’s arm. Before Peter could react, Flash had shoved him up against the locker, peters arm pinned behind his back. What the heck? He had super powers, enhanced reflexes, he should have been able to see that coming. Peter didn’t realize that his subconscious desire to be normal was repressing his powers. Unable to fight back, Peter was shoved into a nearby open locker and locked inside. Peter sighed. Stuck in a locker again. Peter didn’t notice as the orange light in his chest began to glow. He closed his eyes and deeply wished… to stop being a loser. To be normal. To be… anything else than who he was. The orange light grew brighter and brighter… until it completely consumed Peter. Suddenly he heard something
“Parker… Parker!”
With a start Peter Parker woke up, looking around in shock. He was… in a classroom? He was sitting at a desk at the back of a class he didn’t recognize, one that he seemed to have been sleeping through. Had all of that been a crazy dream? He looked over to see the remedial math teacher, Ms Jones. What was he doing in remedial math? Before he could say anything, Ms Jones spoke once more
“Mr Parker, please try to stay awake during class. Your grade is already low enough.” She said, sending a chuckle throughout the room. Peter spoke without thinking, his voice deeper and fuller than he remembered.
“Sorry teach. I’m still tired from our ‘study session’ last night. Thanks for the extra tutoring by the way~” he said. Did he just… flirt with a teacher? He did! And weirdly enough the slight embarrassed blush on Ms Jones face suggested that it was working. Ms. Jones spoke again, more timid this time
“While.. just don’t be late tonight.” She said with a slight wink, before walking over to the front of the classroom again. This caused the class, which now that Peter was looking consisted mostly of the football team, too laugh loudly, one punching Peter on the shoulder in a playful manner. Peter felt a smirk he couldn’t control come over his face, and his eyes involuntaries followed Ms Jones' ass as she walked back to the front of the class. In a daze, Peter tried to figure out what was happening. Wasn’t he just in a locker? What was he doing in remedial math? And why was he acting so weird? Before he could wonder any further, the bell rang and class was dismissed. Peter ran out without talking to anyone, and headed to a nearby bathroom. He looked in the mirror and froze. It was Peter but… completely different. He was bigger, taller, with wider shoulders. He had full, bouncy pecs that were barely contained by his tank top, shredded abs that he could grate cheese on, and truly impressive biceps. Peter had gone from a geek who gets stuffed into lockers to a huge muscular jock! Peter wanted to be shocked, to be horrified, but… he felt another smirk cross his face. He began to flex his muscles cockily. He smirked and felt his thoughts turn. He looked fucking amazing! I mean, of course he did. He was big Pete Parker, the big man, the quarterback, the stud! Slowly Peter began to forget about his old self, too absorbed in the strong, dull thoughts going through his head. He wondered what he and his best bro Flash would do after football practice? Maybe beat up some geeks, or find a hottie to hook up with? Peter had a lot of girls to choose from already, including MJ, Liz, Gwen, Charlie and of course Ms Jones, but… he wouldn’t mind another. Pete smirked and strut out of the bathroom, not noticing a light orange glow between his pecs. Life was fucking sweet.
#jock tf#jock transformation#jockification#muscle growth tf#nerd to jock#reality change#muscle tf#Spider man TF
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mission: gmag | kim minji
summary: coworkers fall in love, very oddly...
pairing: barista!minji x barista!reader
themes: HUMOR, coworkers to lovers, slow-burn, fluff...like tooth-rotting sweetness, rest of newjeans!, major loser reader
wc: 5.4k
"no, listen to me, it's M I N," sakura is so over this, honestly. but you promised to buy her a new controller for her switch if she helped you, so she goes through with it.
"m...i...n..." sakura types slowly as she scrolls with a glass of water in one hand.
"ji," you continue quickly.
"what was that?" she asks and looks up at you.
"j...i. j for james and i for like iphone, i dont know." sakura nods and returns back to typing.
"okay okay, minji.....minji...kim minji....i found her!" sakura flips her phone to show you the girl's instagram page.
you squint at sakura's shaky hands.
"stop, stop. I can't see with your hands shaking all over." sakura frowns at you and tries pulling her phone away. but you're quick to grab it out of your hands. feeling like you've hit the jackpot.
"yes! it's her!"
sakura rolls her eyes and grabs more chips from the coffee table, popping them into her mouth as you happily scroll through your coworker's public instagram page.
"you know you could just talk to her right? like at work...where you both work together in that cramped barista station."
"kkura, you really aren't helping." you mumble as you hit one of the posts of minji at the beach; she's smiling and showing off her cute brown dog. you had overheard minji talking with another worker about her family's brown mini poodle. "that must be choco."
"what i also don't understand is why you're looking her up, on MY phone. when you have a perfectly working phone." sakura continues to eat through the family size bag of lays.
you scoff and pull the blanket off of sakura's legs. "what if one day she asks me to exchange socials and she sees that i've searched her up already? i can't let that happen."
you roll your eyes like it's the most obvious reason.
"wow, i thought i was a loser, but this really takes the cake." she shakes at the bag for more lays and returns her attention to the show thats been playing in the background.
you pay sakura no mind as you now have found yourself happily going through her page. examining each post closely and even going through her tagged photos for more information.
"okay, stop, this is just creepy. you're like a cyber-stalker." sakura yanks her phone out of your hand and pushes your chest away to knock you off your balance. you topple over like a bowling pin. "don't forget you have to buy me new controllers for this!"
sakura leaves with her phone in hand, probably off to phone her friends, leaving you all alone in the apartment with whatever show's been playing.
"what a cockblock." you mutter out as you finish up the lays bag and crumple it, getting ready to go to bed. you let out a long yawn that turns into a groan until the air has left your lungs. now you're coughing like a mad man trying to drink water, you finally cool down.
--
"welcome to milk mocha!" minji shouts from behind the counters, you successfully arrive just shy of 15 minutes late for your shift.
"oh, you're here." minji comments when she looks up from behind the espresso machine and glances at you. you grimace at the dismissive tone, but all minji can see is your hair all over the place and shirt worn inside out and backwards.
needless to say, you pressed snooze a few times too many, and now you're paying the consequences.
"i am so so so sorry minji, i slept past my alarm." you beg for forgiveness and start spewing about how you tripped over your charging cable, accidentally burned your tongue during breakfast, wore wet socks. and minji's heard enough already.
"okay, lets just...get you set up. you're lucky it's slow right now." she ushered you into the staff room and your heart warms at how considerate she is. even feeling a little lovesick that she hasn't written you up for tardiness.
"you're the best minji!" you shout over your shoulder as you change into the work shirt and tie an apron around your waist. horrified to find the tag of your t-shirt facing the world.
you try brushing your hair as best as you can, then tucking into your work cap. you walk out onto the floor and see a few customers around. no one seems to be ordering and you thank the coffee gods for this opportunity.
"soooo minji...." you start, as you wipe down the counters.
"yes?" she's busy cleaning the machines in the meantime and checking that there's enough supplies in the mini fridge.
you turn to her and smile widely, "are you single?"
she stops what she's doing and turns to you. "yes, why do you ask?" in the most monotone voice you've ever heard.
you wonder if minji was a robot in her past life.
"oh, no reason, just curious, hehe." you mumble to yourself and minji looks at you confused but then a customer walks in.
"welcome to milk mocha! how can i help you?" you begin and take the guy's order.
minji's walked away to get ready for the lunch rush, but mostly to think about your question.
--
"hanni, listen to me, the girl's weird." minji says over facetime. hanni's laying on her back scrolling through instagram and nodding along to whatever minji's ranting about.
"mhm, mhm." hanni finds a cute cat video and sends it to haerin.
"she asked me today if i was single."
"mhm."
"and like, why would you ever ask your coworker that? i think that's weird, like she's crossing work boundaries you know?"
"mhm."
"bro! are you even listening?" minji starts tapping at the screen, taking hanni's attention away from the many cat videos.
"yes bro! something about being single?" hanni only spares her some attention before returning back to her cat videos.
"yes! she asked me if i was single!"
hanni looks back into the small rectangular box that minji is in, "okay, i dont see a problem."
haerin sends over a funny gif of fluffy dogs tripping. hanni laughs while minji continues to rant about her new coworker.
then a random notification pops up.
[hairein]: "HI ITS HYEIN HI HI HI"
hyein must have taken haerin's phone and has begun spamming through all the group chats that haerin has. hanni decides that's enough scrolling for a day.
hanni closes her instagram to focus on the conversation, also muting haerin's account for good measure.
"i don't think it's weird that she asked if you're single. if you find someone weird, then of course you're going to think everything they do is weird." hanni continues as she sits up and pulls her self to her desk.
minji goes quiet, thinking about her own views on her new coworker. she's between reasoning that it's okay that she thinks you're weird, but she also feels bad because maybe you two just got off on the wrong foot.
she's never considered giving you a real chance to prove yourself. when you walked in two weeks ago for your first shift with a huge staff in hand (you were going to a convention later cosplaying as maki from jjk) minji already knew to stay away from you.
it doesn't help that the other people at work also thought you were weird. later that shift, your manager reprimanded you for showing up to work with a weapon; you profusely apologized and tried to show that it was just a foam staff. all the other workers already looked at you weirdly though, so maybe minji just followed along.
"well now i feel bad." minji concludes as hanni watches her through the screen.
"good! be more open-minded next time." hanni concludes and hangs up on minji immediately. minji on the other end drops her jaw and curses hanni through the phone.
--
"order for jay!" you shout from the counter, wiping down the americano. minji's shift just started but you're already elbow deep in your shift. it seems that friday's are always busy at miilk mocha. everyone is scrambling to get these orders out as quick as possible.
you look more tired for today's shift, constantly rubbing at your eyes and yawning when no one's looking. kazuha seems concerned that you're so tired.
"hey, you okay?" kazuha asks when you sit down for a quick break. you nod.
"yeah stayed up playing genshin, you know how things go." you explain and continue rubbing at your eyes. hitting a little too hard that it makes you see stars when you blink.
"you need to stop playing till 4am, you know you have a shift at 7." kazuha explains to you, she's already working on the next order. you take a breather and sip on the coffee you made for yourself.
"it's not my fault that game is so addicting." you explain and stretch your body, getting ready to take on the rest of the orders. minji finally fixes her apron and walks out to see you and kazuha chatting it up.
minji tries inserting herself into the conversation, hoping to see a new side of you that isn't so...peculiar.
"what's genshin?"
"minji! you don't know what genshin is?" you exclaim and begin going on a long rant about the game and it's gacha mechanics. you even begin explaining the pulls you have gotten. by the end of it, minji is even more confused and intrigued by you, also worried about your financial responsibility (lack of) because you really just dropped 300 bucks for in-game content.
--
"how are things with the new girl?" hanni's eating her sandwich and minji can't help but feel down.
minji scratches her neck as she thinks about you, "she's good...explained to me the lore of genshin, and then i found out that the staff that she brought to work on her first day was actually for a cosplay outfit, and not just a weapon she carries around."
hanni nods and grabs minji's drink, taking a sip out of it, "so, she's not that weird, just probably made a poor impression."
"yes, you were right." minji sighs and digs into her sandwich, feeling guilty about making presumptions about you.
"hey, cheer up! it's okay, i had a horrible impression of you when i first met you." hanni drinks the rest of juice and lets out a satisfied "ah." until she realizes it wasn't her drink to begin with.
minji just glares at her, "you better pay me back for that."
"see this is why i didn't like you at first." hanni complains but fishes out a five dollar bill and slaps it into minji's hand.
--
"order for macy." you grab the hot chocolate and place it on the counter. a cute little girl with pigtails walks up to the counter and grabs the hot chocolate, standing on her tippy toes. you look over the counter and aw at the cute kid.
"hi macy, want to see my latte art?" you offer, macy nods enthusiastically, you grin before grabbing the frothing cup and doing a nice rosetta for the girl.
she smiles in awe and you laugh, handing her a free cookie for staying, "don't tell anyone i gave you this, okay?" you offer your pinky finger to the small girl. she pinky swears and tucks the cookie into her jacket pocket before leaving with her hot chocolate in hand.
minji's watching the whole interaction and despite being shift manager and wanting to reprimand you for giving out free sweets to customers without asking firsthand, she doesn't have the heart to ruin the sweet act you just did.
in fact, when you find her staring at you, you let out a sheepish laugh and try to move past the fact you gave away a free cookie.
--
"minji! do you want a burger, or hot dog?" you ask, you've officially dedicated yourself the grill master at the company barbecue. the other employees are busy chatting each other up, but you're manning the grill with a coke zero in hand, and expertly making everyone's orders.
"burger, please." minji walks away from her conversation to watch over you, surprisingly you're good at manning the grill, despite still finding way to trip over nothing during work.
this side is actually quite charming, even if you have those ridiculous frog sunglasses over your eyes.
"how are you doing?" minji asks, she peers over the grill and finds rows and rows of burger patties and hot dogs on the other side. you're expertly checking each burger for doneness and rolling hot dogs to ensure even cooking.
"doing great! all patties and hot dogs are coming out delicious and hot hot hot!" you explain. you turn to her and all she can see are those goofy frog glasses on your face. you give her a smirk before turning back to the grill. "first burger that's done is yours to take, by the way."
minji blushes at the sentiment. "you really don't have to do that. everyone should eat first."
"no can do minji, got to make sure you're well fed." you explain and continue flipping burgers while drinking your coke zero. minji finds it adorable how focused you are at this job, even if no one is expecting stellar quality burgers/hot dogs.
"watch out minji!" your head turns faster and you see a football flying your way, definitely going to hit minji on the head, so you block her from the football, having it land straight into your forehead.
"oof." you land backwards and fall to the grass, now rubbing your forehead from the hit. the other coworkers are running up and checking on you, meanwhile all you can do is ask, "you alright minji? it didn't hit you right?"
she blushes wildly at the question and whispers a quiet "i'm good." while you are being pulled off the ground and everyone asks how you're doing. you make jokes, playing it off, saying you were born with a head harder than bricks. everyone laughs and returns back to what they were doing.
"okay, back to the grill." you brush off the dirt all over your apron, and start humming a song while plating finished burgers, handing the first one to minji. "for you!" you tell minji and she gives a thank you before walking away to eat it.
the rest of the barbecue, minji seems to stick by your side throughout the day. this doesn't go unnoticed by kazuha who saw the whole ordeal. her eyes squinting as she sips on her drink.
--
"zuha zuha! i'm tired!" you exclaim, you're working the earliest shift, you were opener and on food prep for the shift. it's near the middle of your shift when you decide to take your break. both kazuha and minji are busy tending to the coffee shop. you sit on a step stool behind the counter to eat a cold croissant from one of the failed batches.
"go walk around or something, you need to get your blood pumping." she explains and goes into depth about the stretches that would promote blood flow and restore energy to your body. you aren't interested in hearing actual solutions, just wanting to vent.
"no! you can't tell me what to do!" you grumble and stuff more of the croissant in your face, even picking out the ham slice to eat separately. minji finds this all a bit weird, as in weird in her stomach kind of weird. the same kind of weird she feels when someone takes the last bag of chips in the convenience store when she goes up to buy it.
she watches how kazuha is so easily able to grab you by the arm, a boundary that she would never cross. and kazuha is pushing you into the backrooms, while you make kissy faces at kazuha, all of which are being dodgeds left and right. "you love me zuha, just admit it!" you shout before the door is closed on you.
kazuha walks back out to the barista station and smiling at minji before continuing to work, "she's something else." minji just nods and tries to will away that nasty feeling in her gut.
"you know she's my cousin right?" kazuha continues, minji stops what she's doing.
"no, i didn't. wow that makes a lot of sense actually." minji explains, kazuha just laughs at her shocked face.
"yeah, just thought you should know." kazuha winks at minji before returning to her espresso machine. minji is confused by the wink, but it's too late to ask; kazuha is already busy in work mode. the feeling in her stomach quells a bit.
--
"what are you looking for?" minji jumps at the sudden voice behind her. you're peering over her shoulder as she holds the walk-in door open.
"you scared me!" minji exclaims and hits you on the shoulder, leading you to pout and rub at your shoulders.
"sorry, bad habit of mine." you explain, "so, what are you looking for?"
minji's still looking around for food that she can eat. she had the great idea of waking up an hour later today, only to find out that hanni already ate her work lunch with a measly 'sorry! i'll pay you back :)) ~hanni' scribbled over a sticky note taped to the fridge door. minji groaned and sped off to get to work on time, completely forgoing a lunch.
"hopefully lunch, hanni ate my lunch."
"you have a bunny named hanni?" you question, trying to look for food in the walk-in.
"no, i have a roommate named hanni, she always steals my food, claims it tastes better than her own food." minji sighs and looked at different rows for hopefully another lone croissant or even a cookie. "is there really no food in here?"
"probably not, since shipment's tomorrow and we've had a busy week." you explain but then you pull your phone out, making a quick call.
"yes one order of a club sandwich, with chips and a cookie please...thank you!" you speak into the phone, minji's confused but you smile at her when she looks at you confused. "okay thank you, can I pick it up now?" and then you hang up the phone.
"what was that?" minji questions but you've already darted out of the walk-in, and minji's hot on your trail watching you run out of the store and make a quick beeline to the deli store around the corner, with your work cap and work apron on. minji laughs at your antics, but her heart warms at the sentiment.
minji returns back into the coffee shop. she might as well wait for you to return so she opens her phone.
[minmin]: new girl bought me lunch
[hanbunny]: you're kidding. even i wouldn't do that.
[minmin]: of course you wouldn't you ate my work lunch!
[minmin]: literally this is all your fault >:(
[hanbunny]: hey, new girl literally is buying you lunch, i think im being a great wingwoman actually, my genius should never be doubted :>
[minmin]: shut up.
[minmin]: also pay me back.
you return breathing heavy but with a brown takeout bag in front of minji's face. minji puts her phone away as she grabs the bag, surprised to see all the things you ordered in the bag. "you really didn't have to do this, how much was it?"
"free 99, don't pay me back minji. it's a thank you for all times you've covered for me when i was late to work." you stretch your legs and sit down next to minji, watching her enjoy the food that you bought.
"want some?" minji splits half her sandwich.
"sure!" you happily grab at the half presented to you and chew happily; minji just laughs at the sight. you remind her of a dog in the way you're so energetic and food driven.
"well if you won't let me pay you back, can i cook you dinner?" minji takes a leap of faith and turns to you, your mouth drops open and you nod intensely, almost choking on the sandwich but finally swallowing the bite.
"yes! i would be honored to try your cooking." you offer as you bite into the sandwich again.
minji smiles at that, "it's a date then."
--
"no, kkura, listen. she said 'it's a date then', but like i don't actually think it's one." you explain while sakura's playing resident evil. her focus being taken up by this new development but also the anxiety from how scary the game is.
"okay, so it's a date." she echos back, moving her head away from the screen.
"but i don't think it is. you know how some people just say it's a date, but it turns out it's just a friend date?" you explain and groan into sakura's plushies.
"no, not really." sakura continues, jumping when a random NPC shows up on the screen's peripheral.
"i just don't want to make it seem like i read it wrong." you explain, toying with the feet of the duck plushie. "what if i the overread it and bring roses to a friend date, you know? then she would think i'm weird and not want to be friends with me. which is fine! but i really would like this to be a date."
"listen kid, just ask her directly if it's a friend date or more. it's easy." sakura explains plainly, frankly you've been going through this back and forth for the past fifteen minutes and sakura's had enough.
you freak out, taking a sharp intake, "absolutely not! that would ruin the mood, then i would look like i'm making her look like an idiot, and minji is not an idiot." you explain.
"i gave you the best advice i got, if you're not going to take it then leave."
"kkura pleaseeee, i need a better way to figure this out."
"nope, not hearing it, good luck!" sakura tunes you out, putting her headphones back on and locking in.
you walk out with sakura's duck plushie still in your hands, if she won't give you good advice then you're taking her belongings.
--
you give yourself some words of encouragement as you knock on her apartment door. behind this door was the living space of your crush and you were sweating, rocking on your feet back and forth in anticipation.
"hello! you're minji's coworker right?" the door opens quickly, and a shorter girl stands before you; she is definitely not minji.
"yes, and you're hanni?" you question to which she nods, excitedly welcoming you into their home. it's what you would expect of minji's living space, very light cream and brown colors all over the living space.
"hanni! i told you to let me answer the door!" minji rushes out of her room, with a cute top on and her hair done in cute braids framing her face, you think she looks gorgeous.
"well minji, it's rude to keep a guest waiting." hanni laughs and smiles at minji weirdly, giving her a quick wink and a pat on her shoulders before disappearing into her room, "it was nice to meet you!"
"you too!" you shout as hanni closes her door.
minji feathers through her hair, and directs you to take off your jacket. you're looking around and you spot minji's work clogs by the shoe rack, and laugh at the sight.
"sorry about hanni, she's usually not so enthusiastic." minji's leading you over to the kitchen where you can see her dinner being cooked. you smile at the delicious smells invading your nose.
"not at all, she seems very nice." you reply back and settle into one of the bar stools.
minji stands awkwardly, confused on how this date should go. "would you like anything to drink? we have water, juice, coke zero, wine-"
"coke zero." you decide, and minji laughs remembering your obsession with that specific drink, no other kind of coke.
"okay, coke zero it is." she hands you the drink to which you happily start drinking, even letting out a large burp, "excuse me."
minji just laughs and finishes stirring the pasta and plating them on the table, it's your favorite, carbonara. you thank the pasta gods for this delicious meal and start to dig in.
minji really hopes the pasta she made tastes good, "how is it?"
"so delicious, better than any pasta i've had before!" you are definitely enjoying the meal as you are finished with the plate before minji can even eat half of hers.
"can i have seconds?"
minji laughs, "of course."
you give yourself another bowl of pasta, happily chatting about interests, you find out that minji's a bit of a audiophile, enjoying all kinds music. she's speaking about her passions but you keep eyeing the stray hair on her cheek. so you reach out and pick it off if minji's face causing her to blush and glow red.
"thank you." she's back to the more reserved minji that you see whenever she's embarrassed. her hands are closed over each other.
"thank you for dinner by the way, you really didn't have to cook me dinner." you say in between bites. you appreciate the girl's kindness; you just can't tell if this is really a date. "i brought flowers by the way!" you go back to your bag and pull out pink carnations.
minji blushes at the gesture, finding it cute that you even thought to bring flowers. she grabs a vase and starts filling it to place the flowers that you have brought, she can't seem to contain her happiness. smiling wildly and then she feels her phone vibrate in her pocket.
[hanbunny]: hey
[hanbunny]: did you two kiss yet?
[hanbunny]: danielle's here too btw
[hanbunny]: hi minji! danielle here! i think your outfit is so cute <3333
[hanbunny]: anyways, hanni here, make a move by the end of the date, if you don't i don't have to pay you back for the lunch i stole
[hanbunny]: love you, good luck!
minji knew the two girls were up to something suspicious, hanni kept demanding that danielle come over earlier in the afternoon. she did not expect the two to be spying on her and your date. minji mutes hanni's conversation, turning to you.
"want to watch a movie?" minji asks as she walks over to the couch. you decide on the lego movie, claiming that it's been your favorite for years, and minji doesn't have the heart to tell you she finds it embarrassing to watch.
you both are enjoying it; well, mostly you are enjoying the movie, and minji's enjoying you enjoying the movie. you tend to recite the lines quietly when you know a long dialogue is coming up, or you clap when you find a scene enjoyable.
minji finds herself relaxing into the date, you seem preoccupied enough with the movie that she goes up to make some popcorn for herself. as she waits for the popcorn, she spots hanni's door cracked open. spotting two sets of eyes watching minji.
minji turns back towards the tv, happy that you haven't discovered the two. "i'm going to the bathroom." minji shouts. you give her a thumbs up and an okay, minji turns to hanni's room.
both girls are eyes wide seeing minji stalk towards them, trying to shut the door but minji's too strong, barging into the room, with hanni tumbling backwards into danielle. both of them sprawled out on hanni's carpet.
"you two have been spying us this whole time?" minji whisper shouts at them. quickly shutting the door behind her.
"i'm sorry!" danielle squeaked out while hanni glared at minji.
"you have nothing to be sorry about dani, minji here just doesn't understand that we are emotional support for her first date!" hanni explains, getting up to sit on her bed.
minji groans and looks around, seeing a giant corkboard filled with poorly shot photos of you and her at work, red string pinned criss crossing all over the board, as if this were a murder case.
"hanni, what is this?" minji nearly shouts, she's horrified to see photos of herself eyeing you or the other way around. hanni simply smiles at her work.
"this is my board for mission: GMAG." she explains proudly, "stands for mission: get minji a girlfriend."
"you have got to be kidding me." minji looks all over the board, trying not to be upset at hanni. she understands the girl is just looking out for her, but this is all a bit much.
"this wasn't my idea!" danielle explains, minji knows that danielle would never do something like this. so she glares at hanni instead, the girl just smirks and points at the board instead.
"whatever, just don't make a peep, i need to get back to this date." minji explains and closes the door behind her, leaving the two alone.
"sorry that took so long." minji walks into the living room, seeing you happily invested in the movie. you smile at her, and pat the seat next to you, inviting her to join you.
"no worries, movie's good!" you explain. even though minji might not completely love the lego movie, she is enjoying being around you and spending time with you. also find it cute that you dropped a blanket over her as she got comfortable.
you recognize the final portion of the movie, "this is my favorite part, minji." you explain to her how cool the collaboration of lego fans and the production cast were. giving her insight on the movie that she definitely did not know. she ends up kissing you through your avid explanation, with your hands all over the place.
you thank the heavens she made the first move because you were worried this was a friend date. minji turns shy at the action, a little shocked by her own boldness. she shifts away from you and avoids your eye contact.
"minji, you just kissed me." you say, a little slow on the pick up. your brain is trying to catch up to what just happened. minji just nods, seemingly invested in the ending credits.
"did you mean to?" you ask, pushing her shoulder a bit.
"yes." she says and you can see her ears getting all red from the embarrassment.
"oh thank god, because i wasn't sure if this was a friend date or romantic date, i mean obviously i wanted it to be a romantic date, but i really wasn't sure if it was. i asked my roommate for help, but she was no help. she told me to ask you if this was a more than a friendly date, and i was like nuh uh no way i am going to ask minji that." you trail on and on, a nervous habit you picked up whenever you didn't know what to say next.
minji kisses you a second time. and you stop talking. "it's definitely more than a friend kind of date." she reaffirms your suspicions and you let out a little laugh. you pull her into a hug, before grabbing her face and giving her a kiss as well.
"i want to kiss you more often." you say.
"yeah?"
"yeah." you conclude proudly.
hanni and danielle are still in hanni's room with their ears against the gap of the door. and then you hear a loud squeal followed by a loud crash. you turn to minji and she immediately groans.
"hanni!" minji shouts. it's silent for a couple seconds until you hear a timid muffled voice. and out comes two girls from hanni's room. you're shocked because you completely forgot about hanni, and to now learn that there was another girl too makes you even more confused.
"hi minji, hello minji's lover." hanni smirks at you, while you hide yourself behind minji.
"hanni stop." minji groans out.
"what? mission: gmag is a success from what i can see." hanni gives you a wink, you feel oddly exposed by the action. meanwhile, hanni's friend is just smiling and nodding at you. you feel a little less worried with her.
as minji and her two friends head back into hanni's room to assess the aftermath caused by the troublemakers. you sit back, scratching your head and munching on popcorn. puzzled by hanni's interest in you.
minji returns with a smile, and casually suggests, "another movie?"
"lego movie part 2?" you ask with a grin.
--
a/n: wrote this in a very silly goofy mood. this piece was only supposed to be around 2k originally...anyways, stay safe and stay healthy everyone!
#minji#newjeans minji#kim minji#newjeans#nwjns#newjeans x reader#minji x reader#minji x you#neoplatinum
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pairing : nerd!bf!pope heyward x cute!gf!reader
warnings/infos : fluff and bittersweet angst, no smut actually but mentions of suggestive content.
highschool sweetheart trope. teenagers in love vibes.
╱╲❀╱╲╱╲❀╱╲╱╲❀╱╲╱╲❀╱╲╱╲❀╱╲╱╲❀╱╲
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ sweetheart highschool boyfriend trope with pope heyward headcanons !
ღˊˎ your nerdy boyfriend pope was the one to always support you, more than your own parents and whole family. your academic weapon boy loved to covered your empty locker with full multi-colors post-it with motivation quotes.
ᰔᩚ “ i believe in you, pretty girl like you who never lose.”
ᰔᩚ “ the only thing so hard is the pressure you put on yourself when you think you can success this whole exam but i know how smart you are. and everytime in your late night session you show me how smarty you are, it make me more and more in love with you.”
ᰔᩚ “ if you want this ice cream so bad, you know what to do ;) “
ᰔᩚ “ you know what is bigger than your ass ? your fat thick brain. make me cum so bad everytime.“ (jj forced him to write this tho.)
ᰔᩚ “ but it's okay if you fail sweetheart, i'm here for you. but don't pout if i'm getting more strict in your study lesson. i just want to help you, how bad i will be to let my girl lose like that and don't win after ??”
ღˊˎ- every time you had a class, and he finished before you, he would wait against the wall. probably, playing video games on his console. jj keeping him company.
➸ btw if you're in an exam, that fucking smart brain is going to climb on jj's shoulders to reach the high window of the classroom and looked after you.
ღˊˎ- you and your genius boyfriend loved hanging out in the big library of the school. you helped him with his research, and you liked it when he taught you things. you loved the fact that he was so intelligent, and that he had passions to share with you.
meanwhile, you watched him speak, your eyes on his lips. and he will ended up kissing you. his soft mouth against yours. short’n lazily kisses.
ᰔᩚ pope was the type of boyfriend to kissed you while softly caressing your neck, getting his hands on your sensitive skin by his touch, his tongue pressed yours, light string of saliva covered your lips. such a fine loser boy.
➸ you were in love with his starry eyes. especially when they looked at you, and chased after you. you know, they cared.
"keep focus, sugar. we're not done yet.”
“ too bad, your smart brain actually turn me on.”
“ maybe i can help you with that ? “
“ oh yes, just continue to telling me some facts with this so serious face. don't stop using your brain but start to use your fingers, let them play with something better than your console.“
“ sorry ma’am but nothing is better than my conso…”
you rolled your eyes. and smiled. because you knew that he telling you the truth. you made him shut up by taking his console.
“ you need to make me cum, and i will give your console back. do you think you can do that, nerdy boy ? ”
“ be prepare to squirt, because is there is one thing here that nerdy boys are the most good at is clearly playing with their toys. so may i give you five orgasms ? “
ღˊˎ he walked you home, taking the bus with you. you were sitting next to each other. each of you had an earphones in your ear. you shared new playlists, and you loved going to a music store and collecting old vinyl with him.
he putted the music headphones on your small head, and you murmured a song that he tried to guess by the movement of your lips.
ღ ˊˎ pope was a pogue. he was not rich. but he will do his best to spoil you. but above all, he's a nerd, he's not obsessed with money. like everyone else he feels the desire to be rich but he is happy with what he has.
for him, it's more important to teach you new things, to spend time on the internet with you, or to play a game while you sit on his lap.
“ man, i can hear your boner.” say jj because pope and him were always together. sometimes, the blonde one came at your house without your consent, and his excuses was “ it's just for a game, i will not sleep here. “
"she's my girlfriend, she sits on my lap and plays like a goddess, of course i have a boner. but why my bestfriend have one?”
“ excuse me for getting a boner when my character is literally a woman with big tits jiggling all over the place, barely covered and in armor. and fights like a fucking soldier.”
“ you two are really….”
ღˊˎ you loved as much as you hated when pope helped you study. because he was so strict. he wasn't the type of boyfriend who was going to get distracted and fuck you because you couldn't think clearly and made him waste our time.
no he was the type of boyfriend to tell you "yes, we've been at this for hours but you can add three more hours since we're still at the beginning of the exercise.”
“ can we take a break ? “
“ i already gave you by let you procrastinate while i'm asking you these answers. “
“ ….pope ! “
“ no no, you can be dumb as you want with your idgaf teachers but not with me. if i'm asking for your answers, i will get it. you can take your time, i don't care. “
“ you're so mean. “
“ because i care of your results ? because i care about your future ? fine, i like being that mean so. “
you gave him a death stare.
“ you better change this look before i get far worse than you could have imagined. “
you pouted, even though it didn’t change anything.
“i don’t want to sound rude but if jj can do it, anyone can do it.”
“ the fact is i don't know who you insult the most jj or me….”
“ listen, i know how smart you are, like i know this brain is the most unique thing i've ever seen. use it, i'm already proud of you, but you just need to show me a little of your incredible intelligence. and not only me, to everyone. “
you started to think more and more, and ended up to work harder to gave him the answers.
ღˊˎ pope was the type of boyfriend to give you handmade jewelry. especially bracelets. and every time you wore them, he was so happy.
he was also the type to watch the sunset on the high school bleachers or on the beach sand for hours with you, his precious girlfriend.
when night fell and he didn't wanted to going home, he would teach you how to surf.
ღ ˊˎ pope loved it when you wore his clothes, mostly his summer shirts and especially when you wore nothing underneath. he was a shy nerd so he would never admit how much he loved watching your freely nipples, slapped by the fresh wind.
you appreciated taking a nap on his chest for hours and hours in the bed of your room, while he's playing with his console, and with his other hand, cuddle you a little. sometimes, he randomly talked, making your ears so soft to his calm asmr voice, while he told you about the games he actually played, geeking about the fantasy core that you were clearly not aware of.
ღˊˎ he was your first love and you had your first time with him. was the same for him, you were the first girl he loved, and it was crazy for him how you made him so dumb when he was so smart.
ღˊˎ he loved complimenting you, telling you how beautiful you were, but also how smart and brilliant you were. that you were more than what people saw or thought about you.
ღ ˊˎ he liked how precious your moments were, how time lasted so long with you.
ღˊˎ you had filled your bedroom wall with your first words sharing together, with things you loved about each other, with photos of our dates. you don't want to forget anything. him neither.
ღ ˊˎ you were so cute with him and always stuck together.
ღ ˊˎ you thought it was going to last a long time, forever and for life. you were teenagers in love, filled with hard feelings, young matters, academic pressure.
ღˊˎ but today, back in the present, you were wondering what happened to your high school sweetheart, was he married, was his wife as nice as you, did he have children, did they look like him, did he have a big house, did he have the one you dreamed of when you were teenagers, was he as happy as he was with you, was he still a pogue or had he changed his future? did he still think about you when you can't get him out of your mind ? did he hear your late night thoughts screaming his name ?
ღ ˊˎ you went back to high school. but he was no longer there. you were no longer young, nor in love. you were adults and married. in the same life that you thought you shared.
ღˊˎ when you tried to contact him by phone but another woman answered the phone to tell you that her husband wasn't there. you understood, understood that you had become a simple memory. and him, the hardest ghost to find.
ღ ˊˎ he was your high school sweetheart, such a smart nerd and such an interesting person. it was certain that he had succeeded in life.
ღ ˊˎ you tried to call him one last time. “you were wrong, i’m not that smart.”
and you burst into tears when you heard his breathing and alive voice.
“ congratulations, pope heyward. was the life you cherished for. “
#pope heyward#outer banks#obx#pope heyward headcanons#pope#obx fic#pope heyward fic#pope heyward fluff#fluff#angst#outer banks fic#bittersweet vibes#pope heyward x reader#pope heyward x you#pope heyward x y/n#outer banks imagine#outer banks x reader#obx content#highschool sweetheart#melanie k12#k 12 aesthetic#pink aesthetic#soft boy#favorite nerd#nerd boy#jj maybank#jjpope#outer banks blurb#pope heyward prompt#Spotify
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❝𝙈𝘼𝙆𝙀𝙎 𝙈𝙀 𝙒𝘼𝙉𝙉𝘼 𝘿𝙊 𝙏𝙃𝙄𝙉𝙂𝙎 𝙏𝙃𝘼𝙏 𝙄 𝙎𝙃𝙊𝙐𝙇𝘿𝙉'𝙏.ᐟ❞
S. SANO + RYUGUJI!F. READER
𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮 ; fucking your little brother's role model while they're just outside is probably something you shouldn't do but shinichiro was just so cute that you couldn't help it!
𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 ; smut, public sex?, oral (m receiving), backshots, p in v, slutty!reader kinda, reader is draken's sister, shin being pussy drunk, loser!shin, kinda short, smoking, unprotected sex, shin's weak ass pull out game, reader skin color not mentioned
marls notes 2 u(*´▽`*) ; one of my all time fav tr writers liked my rinnie post AND reposted it(≧∇≦) !! literally had me giggling and kicking my feet yall :3
The sound of the bell ringing as the door opened gained Shinichio’s attention as he worked on a bike in the front of the shop, he looked up to see who walked in and the cigarette nearly fell out of his mouth with how his lips parted. There stood probably the most beautiful woman Shinichiro had ever seen, you. You stood there with the sunlight shining behind you like you were an angel staring at him with a delightful look on your face, his eyes trailed to your side seeing your little brother, draken standing right next to you with your hand on the side of his head pressing his face into your lower torso as an act of affection but he had an annoyed look on his face obviously not enjoying it.
You must’ve been his sister, draken did say you might come around one day because of how worried you were about where he was going all day after school “You’re Shinichiro right?” You asked tilting your head slightly while you both continued to stare at each other, shinichiro’s cheeks turned a bit red as he continued to gaze at you and your body “Uh yeah.” The smile on your face grew at his response, his voice was hot. He was hot and his voice matched it, you decide then that you need him.
“Cool, I told Kenny I had to meet you or he wouldn’t be able to play.” You said nodding slightly, draken frowned at your comment and began to grumble something about how they weren’t ‘playing’ and how he told you not to call him that in front of people but you didn’t care. You were too busy staring at the Sano man who still hadn’t broken eye contact with you, the only time he did was when his eyes trailed down to your chest. Shinichiro put down the wrench in his hand and looked at draken “They’re out back.” He told the small blonde boy who almost ran out the door before he remembered to look at you asking for permission silently, he knew how strict you were about asking for permission “You heard him, go.” You didn’t have to tell him twice, draken quickly ran out the front door circling the building shouting for Mikey and announcing that he was here which made a giggle escape you as you broke eye contact with the black-haired male to watch your brother.
Shinichiro reached for the rag that was draped on the handle of the bike as he used the opportunity of you not looking at him to observe your body and drool at how your clothes hugged your shape so perfectly “So uh, what’s your name?” He already knew your name, Draken told him but he wanted you to tell him.
To start a conversation y’know?
“[Y/n].” You said watching as the scrawny man wiped his hands free of any grime or oil that had come from the bike, you slightly bit your lip at the sight of his veiny pale hands as you walked closer to him very slowly “That’s a pretty name.” Shinichiro said taking the cigarette out of his mouth before putting it out on the floor he was kneeling on and tossing it behind him, he’d remind himself to clean that up later but right now, he wasn’t moving an inch away especially with you getting closer to him.
“Thank you, y’know shinichiro’s a pretty name too.” You said smiling widely at the compliment and how Shinichiro chuckled lowly at your reply, he was so cute! Him calling your name pretty shouldn’t have meant that much to you because it was just a simple compliment but for you...it was enough to let him fuck you in the back room of the shop after only a few minutes of small talk.
Your hands planted on the flat table black oil getting all over them as you rocked back and forth making the table shake and your breasts that were held by your lacy bra bounce, Shinichiro’s hands held a firm grip on your hips as he relentlessly pounded into you moaning and groaning about how good you felt while he eyed your smooth back as it arched with every harsh hit to your cervix “F-fuck! Shin…!” You moaned out throwing your head back while trying to keep yourself steady while you stared up at the tools propped up on the wall above your head with your lidded eyes full of lust and small tears, it was just so good.
Your shorts were discarded somewhere on the floor along with your panties and shirt leaving you only in your lacey black bra which Shinichiro was dying to rip off, your legs were shaking as you tried to keep standing and not fall to the ground and Shinichiro’s were too, fuck he hadn’t had sex in a while and his legs were cramping but he was not stopping at all. You felt too good for him to stop now “S-so good…! Mhm, f-fuckkkk, baby.” He moaned out running a hand up your smooth back making shivers run down your spine, your face nearly hit the tools on the wall from how violent his thrusts were but you continued moaning like a porn star like your brother, his brother, and their other little friends weren’t outside of this shop right now hanging out. You almost felt guilty for doing this whenever you occasionally heard the fits of giggles and yelling that came from them, key word, almost.
You heard a lot about Shinichiro Sano, the former leader and creator of The Black Dragons. Mainly from your brother who clearly looked up to Shinichiro a lot and he didn't deny it, he told you how he thought Shinichiro was cool for his motor skills but everything else you heard was how he was a loser who got no girls, how he spends most of his time in his shop working on bikes and you were expecting an actual loser, an ugly guy, and thought that this meeting would be short and you’d be quickly to leave but when you caught a glimpse of what he looked like the moment you stepped through the door. You knew you weren’t leaving, not without something from him like his number anyway. You were getting much more than his number.
It didn’t make sense to you how this hot man didn’t get any girls. No one wanted this man? He was hot, and cute, and god did he know how to fuck but their loss, more shin for you;)
“Ow! B-Be...ngh...careful!” You whined through your pitiful moans as Shinichiro delivered a harsh slap to the fat of your ass, he opened his eyes and looked down at you with sweat bullets running down his forehead and nearly closed eyes “Sorry...fuck, beautiful, just–ugh–can’t get enough of ya’.” He responded retreating his hand back to your hip, your hands flew up from the table and onto the wall and the tools covering them in the thick black oil that your palms were coated in. Your cunt tightened around him as you let out a large high-pitched yelp, god you haven’t even known him for twenty minutes and you were already nearing your edge.
But what you didn’t know is that Shinichiro had been holding back for a while so you didn’t think he was a loser for cumming so fast, he was going to wait until you came but this wasn’t really that effective on his part because it’s like holding back and the warmth of your throbbing cunt killed most of the brain cells he had, he wasn’t thinking, there was nothing to think about other than this magnificent pussy of yours. Shinichiro didn’t care about his brother and his stupid friends, he couldn’t give a single shit if they walked in here right now, he’d probably keep going.
Your lips parted forming a small ‘O’ as you breathed heavily “Shit, shit, shit! M’...cumming!” You shouted with your nails digging into the tools on the wall causing you pain but the pleasure overrode it. These words were like the lottery to him as he looked up at the ceiling seeing stars as he felt you cum all over him, he wanted to pull out and spray thick ropes onto your back and that stupid fucking bra he couldn’t take off but he couldn’t and ended up cumming inside, it’s not like he was incompetent, it was just too hard to see anything with the white spots he was seeing.
“Oh my fucking god.” The sano male muttered as he looked at your cunt leaking a mixture of your cum and his own, you were so damn beautiful and his cock sprung up once again when you turned your head to look back at him with a tired face, you glanced down at your back which you expected to be covered in cum before looking at him once again with a tired and evil smile growing on your face and it made him wonder what you were planning to do or say. What he was about to hear would probably put his loser ass in a fucking coma. “Want more.” His eyes widened at your statement and he looked at you like you were crazy.
You needed more of him, you couldn’t just settle for some sloppy backshots! You didn’t expect him to cum inside of you but now that he had, you craved more. More of his dick, you felt like you would die right here if you didn’t “Huh? More?” Shinichiro questioned as he watched you turn your body around before you lowered yourself to your knees in front of him with your legs spread slightly, his dark eyes lowered down once again gazing at how his cum continued to seep out of you and onto the ground with some smeared on the inside of your thighs. He made eye contact with you and you were looking up at him through your lashes with a sweet look “If that’s…okay with you?” You said continuing to look up at him from your spot on the floor completely ignoring his cock that was in front of your face.
Shinchiro wasn’t that lengthy but what he didn’t have in the length department, he made up with his girth, and boy did you feel all of that thickness when he plunged himself into you. It was like he was re-shaping your walls “Y-Yeah, of course!” Shinichiro said more cheerfully than he wanted to as you put your hands on his clothes thighs as his pants were only lowered a bit, he loved the idea of going at it again but that bra…he wanted–no, he needed it off.
“But, can…can you take off your bra?” He requested nervously making you smile and giggle a bit, he was acting like a virgin! Maybe he was but there was no way a virgin could fuck that good. You hummed in response before reaching your arms back and undoing your bra strap before letting it fall to the ground in front of you and Shinichiro’s mouth was agape at the sight, he was definitely rock hard by now “Glad to see you think m’ pretty.” You said looking at his dick that was standing up straight practically sitting against his lower abdomen, you reached to grab it but remembered the oil all over your hands, Shinchiro didn’t. He didn’t care if you covered his cock with that oil, he just needed you to touch him “Forgot about the oil, sorry.” You said quietly wiping your hands on his jeans before lowering your mouth onto him taking him in with no problem whatsoever.
His head flew back with his black hair springing everywhere “Fuck, m....my god.” He moaned as his hand flew to your head as you bobbed your head up and down, your nose pressing into the messy nest that was his black pubes with your hands remaining on his clothed thighs “God, are you always this straight-forward?” Shinichiro asked looking back down at you trying his hardest not to moan as he got that sentence out, you giggled on his dick sending vibrations to it before you pulled off momentarily to reply.
“No, just f'you. You were too cute, couldn’t resist.” You didn’t even give him a chance to respond before you were back sucking on his cock like it was oxygen, you weren’t…really a whore but you weren’t exactly a virgin mary either. But you never let a guy do this much on the first time you met, hell not even the first week but Shinichiro was special, he was really cute and his dick was too! You had no issue being his little cock whore.
Shameless moans and sucking noises echoed into the atmosphere and Shinichiro began to get dizzy and he was seeing stars once again, Jesus, you were really trying to suck his soul out of him weren’t you? Though he wasn’t complaining, not at all and his pathetic whines and groans were evidence of that. “Fuck! Wanna cum on...y-ou. All on you, will you let me baby?” He wailed with a tight grip on your head as he felt your tongue swirl around his cock and his bright pink tip, you nodded and hummed not removing your lips from around his cock enjoying the taste of yourself and his cum that was left on him. He felt a smile growing on your lips as his back arched slightly at the vibrations you were sending to his dick.
God, he was cumming already and you knew it. You wiped your right hand all over his pants to get rid of any oil that was left on there before removing your lips from him with a thin string of saliva connecting you to his tip. Your hand replaced the warmth and moist place that was in your mouth as you began to jerk him off while looking up at him smiling at his moans and his red face.
The sano adult eventually came and came all over your face and tits, he tried to regain a steady breathing pace as he looked down at the beautiful sight that was you as you scooped some of the cum that was on your chest before popping your finger in your mouth humming at the taste. He continued to gaze at you even when you looked at him.
“So, wanna go on a date?”
©torasplanet .ᐟ reblogs and likes are very appreciated! pls do not repost!!
#shinchiro sano#shinchiro x reader#shinichiro sano smut#tokyo rev smut#tokyo revengers smut#tokyo revengers x reader#tokyo rev#torasplanet.ᐟ#marls-fics.ᐟ#tokyo revengers shinichiro#shinchiro sano x reader#manjiro sano#ken ryuguji#fem reader#smut#tr smut#◛⑅·˚shin;3
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if you saw the full video of carlos alcaraz and his team watching rafa's retirement announcement, perhaps you noticed that his coach seemed, dare i say it, reluctant to join in. if you follow juanki and/or jcf academy on social perhaps you noticed that amidst effusive tributes from across the spanish tennis establishment both were conspicuously silent. why the seeming reticence from one spanish great to the spanish great? well. WELL.
juanki, rafa, and the case of the green-eyed monster
("but user alacants, in creating this post aren't you ignoring the vagaries of human nature in favor of imposing a narrowly crafted narrative onto a twenty-year relationship that is probably both more complex and less contentious than you make it out to be?"
of course i am. what are you, new?)
davis cup 2004
prior to 2004 juanki was Mr Davis Cup. he often cites the 2000 cup (where his win decided the tie) as the most meaningful title of his career, more so than roland garros. then 2004 rolls around, spain makes their third final in 5 years… and the day before the tie begins juanki is dropped from the lineup in favor of some 18 year old who's never even played a match at roland garros. (<- actually. isn't that crazy??)
"obviously i am not jumping up and down with happiness." and to be fair to him everyone else sounded baffled as well. and then… the 18 year old had the nerve to play andy roddick in front of a record-breaking 27k home crowd and win.
to twist the knife: at the last minute juanki got named to the doubles match alongside tommy robredo and they got CRUSHED, just absolutely destroyed, by the bryan brothers. held serve once in three sets.
so it is maybe not a surprise that afterwards juanki does not exactly look happy despite nominally winning a major trophy.
it's noticeable enough to make the news. rafa is forced to tell the press nooooo, it's not true that they don't get along. juanki then goes on the record to say that on the trip back from sevilla the captains were only paying attention to nadal and moya, the winners, and ignoring him and tommy, the losers. while this may be true there is no way to make it sound good that you're saying it, yk.
(if you click through you will see that in the same interview he describes himself and rafa as "good friends." rafa goes on to describe them as friends on several more occasions! juanki does not.)
three months later, spain went out in the first round of the 2005 cup, 4-1 to slovakia. juan carlos was not part of the team lmao. and indeed a qualification play-off in september would be his last taste of davis cup action for several years. (that last call-up was ferru's first btw. red string of fate. SORRYYYY I KNOW IT'S NOT ABOUT THEM.)
roland garros 2005
unfortunately if you're juanki it did not get better. here he is in 2005 "[accusing] spanish media of a nadal obsession." (that link will also give you a taste of the contemporary fan discourse lmao.) he was baited, but also, they baited him because they knew he'd rise to the occasion.
rafa nadal btw had just played his first roland garros, which he won. juanki at rg: "unlike the media-designated extraterrestrials i'm just a HUMBLE PLAYER trying to win matches. i'm not one of the favorites but maybe if i keep trying…" he was then forced to deny he was jealous.
(this was shortly after rafa beat him for the title in barcelona, resulting in this cheerful take: "when you're on a high like nadal is everything seems to go right - but it doesn't last forever.")
rafa, meanwhile, is not helping:
QUESTION: Other than Carlos Moya, were there any other Spanish players you grew up watching, admiring? Did you follow Juan Carlos at all when you were growing up? RAFAEL NADAL: No, my favorite was Moya.
rome 2008
the hits continue. by 2008 rafa nadal is THE spanish tennis man, he's the guy everyone thought juanki was going to be. (ouch.) and now they are about to meet in rome. rafa btw has been undefeated on clay since the famous federer hamburg final, for an overall record of 117-4 since 2005. he's never lost in rome.
so imagine the reaction when juanki actually wins.
—wait did you think it was something like "ferrero shocks king of clay in tantalizing return to form." lol of course it's not, it's "nadal suffers freak loss due to blisters." harsh? rafa didn't think so: "i congratulate juan carlos, but today for sure was not my best tennis."
never mind that juanki was also playing through injury, bad enough that it took him out of barcelona then functionally killed his roland garros. (safe to assume that after 2004 he's more or less always injured.) this is typical sports media syndrome, nothing new or particularly unexpected. but once again: juanki is not, like, shy about expressing his thoughts.
QUESTION: The fact that Rafa was injured - he complained about the foot injury at the press conference here - what does that take away from your win? Do you feel it takes a little bit of shine away from your win? JUAN CARLOS FERRERO: [...] When you go to the court and you decide to play, I think the injury is not reason to say yes or no… You know, at the end I play a little bit better than him. I don't know if it was big reason to don't play at his best level, the injury. QUESTION: How much do you think this loss and the injury is going to affect Nadal's preparation for Roland Garros? JUAN CARLOS FERRERO: I don't know. Maybe you have to ask him.
fortunately (???) this match was immediately followed by an explosive spanish tennis row that ended with top players including juanki and rafa joining hands in solidarity to push the president of rfet out of his job, so this did not become the topic it might have otherwise.
davis cup 2009
it's now 2009. juanki hasn't played a davis cup tie since 2005. he's just dropped out of the top 100. and then… rafa and ferru get injured. juanki gets a dc call-up. he heroically saves the qf tie! he wins his sf rubber! his teammates are tossing him in the air, the crowds are chanting his name! he doesn't make the final roster bc everyone is healthy but he's a reserve, he's there with the team. they sweep the tie, the heroes are undisputedly his special friend ferru (epic comeback) + verdasco/lopez (deciding win over undefeated opponents). …and then they go for the obligatory meeting with the prime minister who's like, RAFA YOU WON THE DAVIS CUP FOR US THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH WE LOVE YOU.
a lot of people were unhappy about this, presumably (??) including actual rafa. afterwards, juanki says, "most of the team thought it was disrespectful." one wonders who was not included in "most."
(honestly? probably feli lopez.)
valencia 2013
speaking of actual rafa, did he notice and/or care about anything of this? i mean he definitely noticed. but i assume he didn't care. (rafa experts are welcome to chime in here.) after all, a couple years later rafa spoke at juanki's retirement ceremony. there was a hug and everything!
so like, ok, they are cordial, they are friendly, rafa's place is cemented in history and juanki is retired anyway. THEN less than a year later rafa pulls out of juanki's beloved valencia open to enter a different more lucrative tournament instead and he is fully dead to juanki who is calling him out in the press like, i think it's his DUTY as a SPANIARD to support a spanish tournament.
which event did he choose instead, btw? Roger Federer's Basel™. which he hadn't played since 2004. and then he ended up withdrawing anyway. there was some conspiracy theory type thinking at the time that he only committed to basel so he had an excuse not to play valencia (well that and the $$$) which is almost certainly untrue but is also very funny.
meanwhile juanki sooort of backpedaled like i mean we don't understand his decision but we respect it… sure, juanki.
late-career detente (?)
juanki has since repeatedly gone on the record noting 1. the only player he ever felt inferior to was roger federer 2. who btw is the best player of all time. these are not neutral statements coming from a spaniard and no one is taking them that way.
now having said that, he has also had plenty of nice or at least diplomatic things to say in recent years about rafa's will to compete, etc. "i wouldn't like him to get [to roland garros] and not win matches." while also dropping gems such as:
q: which of the big three was the hardest to play and why? juanki: federer. but i'm just glad i managed to beat all three of them before i retired. :)
with all of this in mind, the aforementioned video of carlos and team watching rafa's message. is. so. funny. JUAN CARLOS GROW UPPPP. like presumably the academy at least will say something once the big moment rolls around but when literally every other spanish tennis player under the sun is posting their glowing tributes and you are Haughtily Silent it's so obvious!! son!!!
additionally: this makes juanki spending the olympics at home so fucking funny. yeah, i bet you DIDN'T want to watch your special friend and your beloved protege coo over rafael nadal for two weeks. like in the year 2024 there's no way it's that serious, nothing more than "my annoying ex-coworker i still have to be polite to." just, they're not friends. and ferru and rafa (and now carlos) are. and it's very funny to me personally.
in conclusion: "rafa largely to blame for ferrero's downfall" (espn, 2012)
#juan carlos ferrero#rafael nadal#to be clear although this post is written from juanki's perspective i am not precisely a sympathizer#like it's rafa nadal what are you gonna do man#i am sympathetic tho. i would probably handle the same situation equally ungracefully.#it really does suck when the narrative you thought you were in is not the narrative you are actually in#you thought you were the protagonist and instead you're the cautionary tale#the doomed backstory. the preliminary foreshadowing.#senpai's not dead he's pursuing higher education at the juan carlos ferrero tennis academy#yes i did talk myself into kinda wanting fic btw.#sounds like perfect conditions for an angry and ill-advised hook-up to meeee
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Burning desire
warnings: professor and student, fem!reader, shameless smut, creampie bc why not, choking (it's James what did you expect), readers a love(lust)struck loser who likes her teacher.
Word count: 4.8k
A/N: first time writing something on that more the 2k. This isn't proofread, but I hope it's to your liking. This is kinda old so it might be bad. Hope you enjoy!
You arrived fairly early on the first day. It wasn't really intentional—you live only a few blocks away and paranoid that you have somehow overslept, rushed to get ready. Thankfully you aren't too early for the door to be locked, just enough for the classroom to be mostly empty of students. There were two other people in the room, pulling paper and pencils out their bags and not paying you any mind. You make yourself comfortable in your seat—not too close but not painfully far from where the instructor will be—and follow in their example.
With nothing left to do, you pull out your phone to mindlessly scroll until class starts. In the midst of liking some random post, your phone buzzes—the low battery notification pops on the screen. You would forget to charge your phone last night. Sighing, you reach into your bag to grab your charger, sifting through the content of your bag only to find it not in there; you must've left it at home. Just great. After your phone dies, you have no other choice but to either look blankly at your desk or watch the few people here.
You find your eyes flitting across the room to them; it's not like you don't watch people when you're bored anyway.
When you've had your fill of observing, the door opens—it looks like your teacher has finally arrived. You watch the man get himself ready for the upcoming lecture; he’s busy arranging some paperwork so you take the time to ogle him shamelessly. He looks young, maybe around his early thirties. His hair is slicked down to perfection and he has a little pencil mustache—He is, admittedly, rather handsome.
You hadn't expected that. You weren't quite sure what your expectation was—probably thought he'd be some fourty-year old depressed asshole whose wife doesn’t love him. Yeah…that'd be the type of person who looks like they’d teach a course like this one.
Suddenly, he glances up, probably to check how many people had come in. Still, it scares the living daylights out of you—you rip your gaze away from him. Opting to snatch up your phone and pretend you have more interesting things to look at besides your teacher, you feel your face warm up when you still feel his eyes on you. The sound of his chair scraping the floor pulls everyone's attention to the front; he saunters over to the board and jots down his name with Expo marker.
“My name is Mr. March,” he declares with a smile. Oh fuck, he has a nice voice.
You don't pay much attention to the rest of his introduction, but you still enjoy the timbre of his voice. Instead, you go back to admiring his looks in a totally-not-creepy way. He looks like money-personified; the black vest, the white button-up underneath, and the pair of black pants are all crisp and obviously made with premium material. He even walks with a grace that most lack,talking in a manner like he is more of a socialite than a mere college professor.
More students start to flow in and by the time Mr. March is through with going over his expectations for the semester, everyone is seated and ready for class to start.
In the row ahead of you, a group of girls were quietly debating amongst themselves if he was single or not. You would've laughed if you weren't curious yourself. You spent the remainder of class staring at him without listening to a word that left his pretty mouth (later on you beat yourself up for not taking notes). His voice was hypnotic, each word sinking you deeper into whatever trance you were in. He was refined… elegant. Every movement looked calculated.
Honestly, he could be one of those old Hollywood stars. Face perfectly sculpted to be plastered on billboards; a smile born for posters. Briefly, you wondered if you were to go searching that you'd find him in a classical film.
Then, he's looking at you and the world stops—it shouldn't be anything mind-blowing because there's really nothing special about it, but still, you find yourself immobilized. His voice is syrupy, smooth, and mind-numbing. He clears his throat and your cheeks burn. He looks expectant, like he's waiting for something. He definitely asked you a question. Scrambling through your racing thoughts, you just stare dumbly at him, waiting for him to repeat whatever he had asked. He doesn't.
“I, er, don't know,” you mumble sheepishly. He quirks an eyebrow at that, painfully unimpressed. He doesn't say anything for what feels like an eternity and his silence suffocates you. The only sounds in the class were a few chuckles from other students. You shift in your seat.
“You would've known if you had listened to me,” he lightly scolds. You nod, hoping that'll be enough to show that you get his point. He furrows his brows, and he looks like he's about to push it further. Luckily, he takes mercy on you and simply repeats the initial question.
A few more giggles, and the class is back to normal. You'd think being publicly berated would be enough for you to learn your lesson, but it isn't. Because soon enough, his words are going in one ear and out the other—the words meld together into a pleasant hum in the background.
Before you know it, class is over. You bite your lip as you hurry to pack your bags, the shame from earlier returning like a punch to the gut. You don't dare look in his direction, avoiding eye contact at all costs. You scurry out the door, and thank the lord he's your only class of the day.
You let out a long-awaited sigh as you burst through your front door, haphazardly throwing your bag in the corner—you can finally decompress. You study until you feel like your head is about to burst to keep your thoughts off of him and the rather embarrassing way your first day ended.
It's been a few weeks since you got chastised for being an absent-minded idiot, and despite the embarrassment you can't bring yourself to be mad at him. Instead of anger, or even mild annoyance, all you feel is attraction. You try to deny it, bottle it up and push it to the back of your mind. Innocent fascination is what you label it. His passè charm and unconventional way of speaking is why you can't get him out of your head. That's the real reason all your thoughts lead back to him. Why at night you get struck with downright obscene visuals of him. You don't touch yourself— At least not in reality.
The you— you’ve conjured up in your head does, she touches him too. She fondles him in places you'll never see—let alone touch in real life. He says things to her that you'll never hear. He gradually seeps into your dreams, when that happens you wake up with damp underwear, and humiliation that settles deep in the crevices of your gut. It makes seeing him so much worse, but something about him captivates you.
You find yourself sneaking glances when you're convinced he isn't looking– It's the only thing you can't seem to stop– so you indulge. The only rule: don't get caught. And that sounds pretty easy to adhere to. Just don't look too long.
Simple, right?
Naively, you were confident you could do it. It worked for a little while. But at some point, you got complacent. Assured yourself you wouldn't get caught because you were doing so well. Your eyes meet in slow motion, or that's how it felt to you. In the middle of personal study time, so you had no real excuse. Neither of you break eye contact for a few more seconds, and he has a plain, almost bored expression on his face.
Ducking your head down, you stare at your blank paper. You don't pretend to write anything. It's pointless now. You’d been caught red-handed. You simply sit there, wallowing in your shame. That's become your favorite pastime lately. Deciding enough time has passed, you peek up. He's gone back to whatever he was writing and you decide that now is the time to actually write on your paper.
Class ends and you're packing up. You don't rush today, taking your time collecting your things.
“a word, please.”
You swallow dryly, cemented in place. Hesitantly, you peer up at him. His eyes bore deep into your soul like two black voids sucking you in. Growing impatient, he adds: “Yes, you. I'd like to speak to you.”
You dwandle your way to him. He doesn't rush you, at least not verbally, but by the look on his face your torpor was getting under his skin. You pick up the pace. Finally, you reach his desk. “You, um, wanted to speak to me?”
“Mm,” He clasps his hands, sitting them on his desk. “I called you here to discuss your grades,” he says, “you're a clever girl, we're both aware of that. You could be doing so much better, but there's something distracting you, correct?”
For a brief moment thick, uncomfortable silence falls over the two of you. You rummage through your brain for explanations. How could you tell him that he's the distraction? That all your troubles were somehow connected to him.
“I, uh, haven't been keeping up with my studies lately,” you stammer, “My sleep schedule has been kinda messed up,” Because of you. “So, when I get that in order I should be good.”
He frowns, narrowing his eyes slightly; he doesn't look convinced. Standing up, he makes his way to you. He stops in front of you, looming over you like a shadow. He's of average height, but you still have to tilt your head up to meet his gaze. You’re struck by the fragrance of his cologne— god, he smells amazing. He places a hand on your shoulder, you tense up almost immediately. His hand is so big. Shaking those thoughts away, you nervously await his next word.
“If you don't compose yourself, I fear I may have to take on a more… hands-on approach.” he tuts, giving your shoulder a nearly painful squeeze. You blink, dazed. You swallow once more, desperately trying to wet your throat. “I understand,” you utter, voice airy like you'd been running a marathon. You feel dizzy. His words buzzing in your head like tv static.
You honestly just want to get out of here, and wait out the heat that’s building between your thighs. Pleased with your response, he smiles at you. A lazy, feline grin, and you can see the slight indents of his dimples.
“Wonderful!” He replies, gleefully. His hand lets go of your shoulder. Your skin is still throbbing from the contact. “Well, then, you're dismissed.”
When you make it inside, you're panting, body covered in a thin sheen of sweat from speed walking all the way home. You let your bag drop onto the floor, unconcerned with where it lands. You sigh, exasperated. There's a pressure in your chest, or it could be described as a warmth. Or an ache. Or all those things at once. You weren't sure— nor do you really care. All you know is his words keep replaying in your head, muddling all your thoughts.
You practically run to your bed, exhausted from your own thoughts. Before you can attempt to stop it, he's invading your head for the umpteenth time. You groan. That warmth in your chest begins trickling down, pooling in the space between your legs. You can still feel his hand on your shoulder, the dull ache of the squeeze. Flipping onto your back, you stare vacantly at the ceiling. You could only deny yourself for so long. Placing your feet flat on the mattress, your hand slips past the band of your panties. A little relaxation couldn't hurt. Especially with how pent up you've been, It was well deserved.
You let out a breathless little whine when your fingers brush your swollen clit. God, you needed this. You run a finger through your folds, the slick sticks your skin. Using your wetness to ease the friction, you rub slow circles on your clit, and your eyes flutter shut. You could see him on the back of your eyelids. Your hips buck up pathetically into your own hand. You're leaking, cunt quivering around nothing.
You could still smell him. The scent of his cologne was intoxicating, even now it lingered in your nose. Rich and velvety. Something that wealthy decadents would wear just to let you know you'd never be able to afford it. You push a finger in, various curses fall from your lips. His hands– my god, his hands. They're so big. So strong. You slip another finger in. The heel of your hand grinds against your clit, and the feeling sends chills down your spine.
You're a writhing, squirming mess on your bed. The squelching from your fingers thrusting into your dripping cunt has the tips of your ears burning, but you don't stop. You picture him, his fingers knuckle deep in your cunt, methodically fucking them in and out of you. You imagine him curling them inside of you, and you mimic the motion in real life, sending another rush of slick gushing out. You think about the sweet purr of his voice, urging you on— instructing you to cum, so you do. You come hard, mumbling his name like he's your new god.
The shower after is long and quiet, you spend a good portion letting the water run down your body to soothe your tense muscles. You don't play any music or hum anything. You’re barely thinking. Your only goal is to get in bed and pass out. And when you finish, that's exactly what you do. You snuggle into your covers and as soon as your head hits the pillow you're out.
Your eyelids slowly peel apart; heavy. Your entire body feels like a bag of rocks. You lie there, taking long, drawn-out blinks. There's a strange peacefulness in the air. None of the usual worry that fills your head, no noise besides your soft breaths, and the sweet song of the birds outside. You prop yourself up, reaching out to your bedside table to grab your phone. With a click your phone turns on, the sudden light blinds you. Blinking away the blurriness, your eyes begin to focus on the big white numbers: 11:25
You stumble out of the comfort of your bed. You have five minutes to get ready and head out the door. Running to your dresser, you pull out some clothes to wear. How you manage the sleep through your numerous alarms was beyond you, but nevertheless that didn't turn back time. You shuffle into your bra, throw the shirt over your head, and jump into a pair of pants. You're able to get the important parts of your morning routine done. Besides a few things like washing your face and properly brushing your hair. Giving yourself a once-over, you decide you don't look too bad. Just a little lazier than normal but casual enough. Sighing, you depart to class.
Standing in front of the door, you take a deep breath, straighten your back. You can already see his face, his mouth pressed into a hard line. A flicker of disappointment in his eyes. You knock on the door, and wait for it to open. When you hear a soft click, you push the door open, hurrying to your seat. When you sit down, you glance at him and he's already looking at you. Face devoid of any signs of what he's feeling. You pluck the needed supplies out of your bag, and he continues the lesson.
The class goes excruciatingly slow. Focusing seems near impossible, so you resort to scribbling down anything you deem important without actually listening to what he's saying. Which you can only hope doesn't bite you in the ass too much in the future. The class comes to a close, and before you can even think about leaving he's calling your name. You wince, forcing yourself to walk to his desk. He's definitely gonna tear a chunk out of you.
“Sir?” You mutter, ashamed.
“You were late,” he states, plain and simple. His words linger heavily in the air.
“I, um, slept in. I apologize, it was a mistake on my part.” You sputter, fidgeting with the strap of your bag. He lifted his head, eyes piercing into you. Your mouth squeezes shut.
“you slept in,” he echoes, empty. With a stern tone, he adds, “Excuses will not be tolerated, especially after I gave an explicit warning to get yourself together.”
You feel queasy, like your stomach rolling in on itself. You don't know what to say. Your heartbeat pounds in your head, rattles your ribcage, reverberating through your entire body. You don't know what to do that doesn't make you seem more of a fool than you already are. So you say the only thing that's worked for you so far.
“I know, sir. I am truly sorry.”
“Indeed you are,” he purrs as inches closer to you, fingertips dragging against his desk. His intense eye contact frightens you, makes you feel like he'd put a giant red target on you: open prey. A strange, uncomfortable heat flushing your body, feels akin to little fires starting from the tips of your fingers. He stops in front of you, closer than you would deem comfortable, but you couldn't move— something willing you to stay right where you are. A need.
You feel trapped, or rather, you're paralyzed. Even though there's nothing constraining you, and all you have to do is walk out the room. You can't move; his eyes immobilize you, demanding that you stay. Reluctantly, you obey. He settles a hand on your shoulder, “yet, you're not sorry enough to listen.” Before you can defend yourself, his hand slowly starts traveling up, gently wrapping around your neck. You notice, but oddly enough, you choose not to question it. “So, I must ask, what's distracting you? And there's no need for any falsities, my dear.”
You freeze, eyes wide. Dumb and glassy, fawn-like. “it’s- it's really not important, and I promise that I'll straighten out my behavior. It's been a rough week.” you murmur, the tips of your ears burning.
He frowns, hand flexing around your neck. You don't know if it was intentional, but it gets his point across all the same. “Like I said, there's no reason for further deception.”
Sucking in a deep breath and closing your eyes, you mentally agree he's right and getting it off your chest could probably do you some good. “It's you. You're my problem– or my distraction, in your words.”
He doesn't look fazed. In fact, he looks like he knew before you even opened your mouth. He looked like he could tell you every thought you had verbatim. After a moment of silence, he inquires, “how long?”
Innocuous, but still you shy away from him. Your mouth squeezes shut, and your head is about to turn to the side, but he's capturing your face in his hand— forcing you to look at him. His grip is firm, nails lightly digging into the fat of your cheeks.
“since the, um, first day” you murmur, skittish.
He gives a slight nod. He knew you were attracted to him, but he had ignored it. Flicking off your open desire as a fleeting crush. That, like the other girls, you'd move on. Unfortunately for the two of you, you never did. But day after day of seeing the desperation mixed with adoration swirling around in your big, bright doe eyes, even though he would never speak it aloud, stirred something in him. And now, you’re in front of him with your heart in your hands. that pathetic, helpless look on your pretty face. it set something off within him, a spark of heat he couldn't ignore.
“Is that so…” he responds, casually. Offhandedly, even. He’s pensive, looking at you with a blank face. He’s always withdrawn, always hard to read. You never can guess what's going on in that head of his, and that was something you admired. But right now, you wished you could crack open his skull and hear his thoughts for yourself.
The tension is tangible, turning the air thick. You wish he would do anything to rid you of this horrible ache in your chest. Shoo away the sinking pit in your stomach that grows the more his silence drags on.
“Do something,” you whisper. You don't know what to expect. You can't begin to predict what he'll do with your confession, but you figure he'll send you off with a broken heart and your tail tucked between your legs.
His face scrunched up, and then it straightened out. turning eerily calm with a strange sense of resolve. unceremoniously, his mouth crashes into yours. hungry and ravenous. For a second, you didn't reciprocate. you were stupefied by his forwardness. you had expected many things but not a kiss. After gaining your bearings, you carefully carefully began to kiss back, following the pace he had set. His teeth sink into your bottom lip, hard enough to draw blood. you whimper, and he lets out a low groan, lapping away the metallic liquid.
your heart hammered in the confines of your chest. you were high off the taste of him. a mixture of mint and nicotine. you wanted more, you wanted everything he was willing to dish out. your hands gripped at the fabric of his shirt, tugging him closer. it was so surreal— his warmth, his scent, his lips on yours. it was something you couldn't let fall through your fingers. Then without pulling away, he’s spinning you around, backing you up until you're perched on the edge of his desk.
Your mind is misty. your vision blurs at the edges like a gossamer film is covering it. If it's from the lack of oxygen, or how incredibly unreal the situation is still impossible to ascertain. He pulls away to attach himself to your neck, leaving feverish open mouth kisses on your neck. You can feel him inhaling against your skin, breathing you in. Without warning, he digs his teeth into the thin skin between the junction of your neck and shoulder.
He laves his tongue over the indents left behind, and you take it as a silent apology. James squeezes your thigh, massaging it. You’re soft to the touch, pliant. Almost pillowy. His hand snakes down, down, down. Slipping into your pants, past the band of your panties. His fingers brush against your sensitive clit, and you spread your legs further to give him more room. You're leaking over the pads of his fingers, and he dips lower, collecting it. He smears your wetness on your aching bud in tight, deliberate circles. You let out soft pants, rolling your hips against him, desperate for more contact.
“More,” you whine. A small pout tugging at your plump lips.
“you want more, hm? Such a greedy little thing you are,” he croons, giving your clit a mean pinch. It yanks a squeal out of you. The melange of pain and pleasure confuses you, entices you. You give him a meek nod tugging your bottom lip between your teeth. He plunges two fingers in your needy cunt, and your back curves. He hums, pumping his fingers into you with a steady pace. He rolls your aching nub beneath his thumb. It's methodical, automatic. Downright robotic the way he splits you apart on his nimble fingers. He touches you like he's known you for an entire lifetime, strumming your chords like he knows exactly what to do to make you cry out.
His fingers are long, slender, and so, so pretty. And god does he know how to use them. With pinpoint precision, he's curling his fingers inside of you, pressing that spot inside of you that has your eyes rolling into your skull. You're gushing around him, and the squelch of it is obscene. It's embarrassing how you fall apart merely from his deft fingers. Nonsensical babbles fall from your mouth, too high off pleasure to make sense, but he doesn't seem to mind. Soon, a coil begins to tighten in your groin. A buzzing heat in your lower region. It's undeniable, inescapable.
“M gonna cum, don't stop– please, please, please.” You babble, your fingers gripping for purchase on his desk.
Frissions of pleasure shoot through your body like lightning. Your mouth falls agape, and you tilt your head back. The coil snaps, and you quickly begin to unravel around his fingers. He eases you through it, doesn't stop until you've stopped trembling, and then he's sliding you off the desk. He turns you around, and places a sizable hand on your back, bending you over the table. He hastily tugs your pants down, leaving them bunched up at your mid-thigh.
You feel the tip of his cock probe your entrance. Nervous, you press your warm face against the varnished wood, letting a wave of relief wash over you from its coldness. He doesn't give you time to prepare before he's bottoming out. The stretch burns, a dull incessant ache. You don't realize you're gritting your teeth until the feeling ebbs and shifts into velvety pleasure. To your surprise, his thrusts are a measured pace, rhythmic. Maybe he was taking mercy on you, but he quickly loses the pace for something rougher. Fast and hard, thrusts that jolt you forward, edge of the desk biting into your hips.
“is this what you wanted? to be bent over my desk like the needy little harlot you are.” you let out a high pitched whine at that, cunt fluttering around his cock. he was so crude, so incredibly mean, but he was right. he's so right that it's embarrassing.
you feel a vascular hand wrap around your neck, tugging you into an arch. “say it, tell me this is what you wanted,” he grunts, hips snapping hard against yours, it was downright painful.
“this is what I wanted,” you cry out, nodding your head. “good girl,” he utters, his tone ominously dark. it sent chills racing down your spine. his other hand wraps around your neck, and he begins to squeeze. at first, it's harmless, it's not tight enough to do damage, just applying pressure. it wasn't until he didn't stop squeezing that you started to panic. eyes going wide and glassy, your hands tried to peel his hands away to no avail. so you tried to scratch at them, in hopes that he'd finally pull away. but he didn't budge. your lungs were starting to burn, your thoughts getting increasingly fuzzy.
despite all of this, he didn't stop his ruthless thrusting. your cunt clamped down on his cock, squeezing him for all that he's worth. your vision starts to blur, everything begins melting together. your hands drop back down to the desk, and you can feel yourself going limp in his hold. you couldn't tell if you were simply going to pass out, or if you close your eyes you're going to die, but you didn't want to find out.
a dribble of drool slinks down your chin. your head is throbbing. there's a dull ringing in your ears, and it's becoming harder to keep yourself awake or alive. feeling your eyes closing on their own, you felt stinging tears rushing down your cheeks. then, you felt it, a sudden warmth in your lower region. that familiar ache in your womb. a few more harsh thrusts, and you were leaking all over his cock. he followed suit, thick ropes of cum fill you up soon after. thankfully, he let go. you thought he was going to kill you for a second.
gasping, you lurched forward, letting yourself rest on the desk. your head was spinning and your legs felt like jello. you didn't speak, just laid there. It takes you a minute to collect yourself. Especially after fearing for your life. You were pretty sure he was going to kill you. He pulls out of your wordlessly, slipping his cock back in his pants. Once you convince yourself that you're okay, you pull up your pants. The feeling of his cum gushing out of you is kinda gross but you can deal. You're going straight home anyway so you can wash it off when you get there.
He doesn't say anything until you're walking away, "I hope to see you again tomorrow. We still have much to improve after class."
The implications are enough to have you red-faced and very excited for the day to come. You don't know why you're still fooling around with him. Despite the fact that he may be dangerous. It entices you further like the dumb little girl you are. So, like an idiot, you give a coy smile over your shoulder, "yes, Mr. March. I'll be there."
#james patrick march#james march#kai anderson#james march x reader#ahs#james march smut#kyle spencer#tate langdon#james patrick march x reader#james march x you#evan peters smut#i love him so much#kit walker#jpm x reader#american horror story#kai anderson x you#tate langdon x reader#kyle spencer x reader#kit walker x y/n#jimmy darling x you#jadesfic
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and the crowd went mild 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 also no chara dividers im lazy rn
these r so short id add more but im rushing rn sorry lmfao 😭😭😭
intended lowercase!
misc. obm hcs
LUCIFER
wakes up at the ass crack of dawn every single morning.
wears those old man pjs. with the long hat and fuzzy slippers and gown. you know the one.
most bitter coffee you've ever had in your life how he can drink it is astonishing.
his bed, his mattress, his pillows are all as hard as rock how does this man SLEEP.
sleeps like hes the corpse at the funeral hes that one image
MAMMON
will pull you into a headlock and call it a hug.
LEVIATHAN
guy who had mountain dew and cheeto dust in his veins instead of blood. guy who marinates in his room for two months straight. guy who- (i am immediately shot dead).
did a collab with the anti-lucifer league to create a 100k words dialuci fic to piss off lucifer (dont worry about him he got paid in anime and tsl merch).
TRULY believes he is the #1 tsl fan. and also #1 ruri fan.
wimp who VOLUNTARILY makes you cosplays if you are a cosplayer or even if you aren't. it will happen.
vtuber fan. he was like "hey i wanna be a streamer but i dont wanna show my face but i also want to be an anime boy! wait-" and now hes a vtuber.
has accidentally referred to all of his brothers as "chat" at least once. hes never recovering from that btw.
SATAN
cannot stop annotating books he reads for the life of him.
all of his books are just filled to the brim with sticky notes because all he does is annotate.
once he has a crush he will start imagining him and them in the same scenarios as the characters in romance novels he read. (loser alert!!)
sneaking a new cat into hol like once a week (he never succeeds btw).
ASMODEUS
oh boy his room REEKS of perfume and body spray.
"i sprayed my new perfume in every nook and cranny! smells so floral and elegant, don't you think?" (it smells like a bath and body works threw up.)
surprisingly plays the trumpet and BOY is he loud. bro is absolutely blasting those notes.
worst driver ever btw.
BEELZEBUB
freckles all over!! like a lot. *im not beating the insane allegations*
ate like 27 family size dorito bags, 30 dollars worth of taco bell, and four sprites in one sitting and he still hasnt recovered.
sleeps. like a lot. not as much as belphie but enough to be considered an eepy guy.
BELPHEGOR
will randomly grab every blanket and pillow he can get his hands on and make a nest in the common room if he's up to it. and then have everyone make a dog pile in it just so they can hang out and be silly.
will NOT clean it up afterwards. lucifer will tell him to and his only response will be "im tired..."
freckles like beel too i think theyre silly.
9829364 cow plushies. (theyre all from lucifer)
SOLOMON
will randomly gaslight people for no reason
"hey did you do the homework"
homework? what homework? there was homework? my, what even is homework? never heard of that.
"hey, i heard of this animal from the human world called a giraffe! can i see a picture?"
what? what's a giraffe? oh, those!! yeah, they're just myths. they're not real. purely fiction!!
yk that one post about tumblr funnyman solomon. he is a tumblr funnyman to me. he confidently posts his exploded spaghetti and gets 10k notes i think.
SIMEON
has a book club with satan and solomon. :)
probably writes oneshots of the brothers on tumblr idfk man (sorry to the simeon fans i write like nothing on this guy bro).
LUKE
bodily six ("but didnt the devs say hes ten?" shut up. /j)
along with that, also shorter than in canon. (since hes. yk. a first grader. that BOY is not five foot hes one sauce packet long dude.)
favorite store in the human world is walmart. i like to think his human world outfit is all exclusively from walmart bc thats funny i think.
DIAVOLO
hands of STEEL. he tries to grab your wrist and he nearly crushes it by accident.
ice cream!! he loves it :) his favorite is strawberry btw.
also this boy is NOT a himbo hes a smart man.
needs like a hug and some sleep and also a friend this boy works too much!!
BARBATOS
short. like really short. especially according to devildom standards since most demons are super tall.
"but isn't he six feet?" not in my heart.
somehow always making tea for some reason?? if he's not making tea then he's making pastries.
my boy does not SLEEP. hasn't slept since the sun has been birthed and doesn't plan on ever doing it.
#a letter from yours truly!💌#obey me headcanons#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#obey me solomon#obey me luke#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#not tagging sim i dont wanna disappoint the fans lmao
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the bafta livestream out of context: top 60 cursed quotes.
There is nothing more cursed than the livestream I just witnessed, and I made a summary post but now I'm just going to put in quotes by the worthy maggots in the stream with no context, because BELIEVE ME THE CONTEXT DIDN'T MAKE ANYTHING BETTER. The livestream chat was NOT A PLACE OF THE LORD.
I'm going to make the quotes that were by me a different colour. Please know that I am NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR A SINGLE QUOTE OTHER THAN THOSE. SO HERE'S THE TOP 60 IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
Barbenhimer awakened things in me ok
aroace people the most disturbingly sexual talkers on the planet fight me on this
WHO JUST GASPED
MICHAEL SHEENS BABY TALKING BARK BADK IM A DOG BARK WOOF
I feel so sorry for this woman. She's being so heartfelt and we're here thristing over a slinky that possessed a man
IRELAAAND PLEASE ADOPT ME AS YOUR OWN PLEASE TAKE ME TO THE LAND OF UNPRONOUNCABLE WORDS, GREEN FEILD, CATHOLISISM AND HOZIER PLEASE
the urge to go to france and misgender a croissant is real
Devastated the slutty knees have gone away
So many men nowadays are so submissive and breedable like thank you lord for these men thank you
witches and murder slime tutorial
speaking of royals did the bloke who ISN'T lizzy's husband but her son apparently die yet
Turtleneck Crowley is my gender.
WE COULD HAVE LEFT IT AS NOT SAFE FOR WORK WHY THE DRTAOLS ASMI
SAY AN BFUIL CEAD AGAM DUL GO DTÍ AN LEITHREAS AN WE'LL LET YOU THROUGJ
"Oompa loompa doopety dee, I really hated being in this movie" -Hugh grant probably
IF YOU'RE A CHILD AVERT YOUR EYES FROM THAT MESSAGE IM SORRY
i want the kilt back this a betrayal
if someone put me in a room with kilt!david tennant one of us is walking out of that room pregnant and its not gonna be me
a lot of these words are in the bible and none of them should be in that order you need jesus
Can we vote to make david wear that kilt back? Maybe make him do a twirl this time
You mean Bildaddy? 😏
Honey what make you think a dude who roamed around with prostitutes and got himself more holes for mankind won't be calling bildad bildaddy? [this was about jesus btw.]
FREE THE KNEE
Show us the knees!
AND YOU'RE COMING AFTER ME FOR MY BLOWJOB BANANA
He looks like those fancy chocolates. Imma take a bite outta him. Think you'll leak molten goo like them?
My brain isn't working, I read "bratty couch jr"
i'm sorry the what holes
FIND ME ON GOAD AND I WILL MAKE YOU PAY APPROPRIATELY
I genuinely thought it was a road typo and I thought you were threatening asmi with physical violence on the road
OHH FLOWER OF SCOTLAAAAAAND
Combine that with the unfortunate oranges and see what happens.
DEVASTATING NEWS I ATE UP ALL OF THEM SO I'VE BROUGHT A BLOWJOB BANANA INSTEAD
That reminded me of the army video where the guy was deepthroating a 7 inch banana without a hitch.
OMG THEY JUST FLASHED BACK & I GOT A GLIMPSE OF THAT KILT 🥵🥵🥵
thats why apollo had to deliver you at an illegal sushi restaurant
How long do you think it would take to get david naked from his chocolate man suit? Can we set a new speedrun category?
SUPERBOWL FOR TENNANTISTS
Big feelings about pants straps in the chat tonight
Last time i check yoire supposed to thank the lord gor his gifts
HEY GUYS ASMI'S FROM A PARALLEL UNIVERSE CONFIRMED
I just have a deep appreciation for ireland
Can you use suspenders as bondage gear? I mean it looks like it would be fine? I mean if you make the length a bit more they might be more comfortable than ropes. Just sayin
All i can think when i see him in the costume is the one specific ken and oppenhimer slash fic. Lord help me i can't be saved
GIVE MY LOVE TO THE LEPRECHAAAAAAAAAAAUNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Like a giant orange slice on her one arm.
Stop hitting the lectern geez / what if its into that?
Men who wear suspenders are such losers like why do you need so much cloth to keep your pants up. Why dont you just wear a belt. Where do you live. What is your timezone. What are you office hours
what is this suspender shaming ari chappal for you
Aziraphales office hours are: fuck off
Put me ina room with a suspender wearing man and he shall have the same fate as kilttennant
MARIYADAM E ILLAI
It was titled "snake in my b***" It meant butt lmfao
CROWLEY AND LOKI MY GENDERFLUID ICONS
THE KNEES ARE BACK
THEKNEES GOD SAVE ME FROM THESE SINFUL THOUGHTS
What if slutshaming is my kink?
NOT THE BLOWJOB FACE NO
AT THIS POINT IF NEIL HASN'T UNFOLLOWED ME YET HE'S ASKING TO BE MENTALLY SCARRED IM SORRY
I am failing
Tagging the main culprits whose tumblr handles I know:
@thearoacemess @vitrilol @queermarzipan @good-usernames-were-taken
Cheers, maggots.
#good omens mascot#weirdly specific but ok#asmi#good omens#maggots#good omens fandom#crowley#bafta awards#bafta 2024#bafta#suspenders#discord livestream#david tennant#michael sheen#barbenheimer#oppenheimer
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𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐏𝐀𝐘
" so, you're tellin' me you took a liking to one of your clients and took him back to yours for a little extra ‘product’ ?! "
𒄬࣪݁ ˖ geto suguru x dealer!reader
contents. smut with some plot, no sex just eating out (hottest thing a man can do), petname (doll), mention of drugs, use of drugs, not proofread, eng isn’t my first language, bit of fluff here and there ✧ w.count 1.1k
a/n sorry this was a late post, i've been holding it for sooo long because writing smut is not easy for me. anyways, this was the most requested on my poll, requests are still open in my inbox !
also in the story i was supposed to mention that c.meth increases your sex drive buuuttt i forgot so..
+ i appreciate any reblogs and likes 💛
THE TRADE-OFF | 2:09PM
ᡴ੭ your apartment was only could only be so 'big', cramping you up, object between object along your boxes of carts. it was a mess, clothes everywhere and probably even some specs of white powder from previous clients. i mean who could blame you? you were only trying to juggle between a job and studies; to which you barely cared for anyway.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀your parents would be disappointed, sighing at the sight of your marks in contrast to the others in your batch. they wouldn't say anything specific — no — they would just ask how were doing, if something was distracting you; and something was. when you got into the business, it was only out of necessity, money was running low; now you do it out of habit, running back to the drugs you produced to test and sell.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀test and sell. that's all you had to do. no need to interact with your buyers, no need to give them more than what they ask for, - who is that benefitting? - and definitely no need to be staring at them longer than demanded. you hadn't meant to do it on purpose; gripping the pack while you stared at that loose string of hair in front of his face. where had this man been hiding?
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀"uh, sorry was that not enough?" he awkwardly pointed accordingly to the couple tens in your hand, still tugging at the plastic bag of crystal. "miss?" he leaned closer, trying to snap you out of whatever trance you were clearly trapped in. it took you a couple blinks, but you were out — finally — and gave him the drugs in exchange for sixty (even though it costs well over a hundred, especially since it was c.meth).
⠀⠀⠀⠀he waved goodbye, saving you from that god awful embarrassing encounter. you often forgot what was considered a good time to speak, this post-shame event certainly not being one of them. "I've got more back at my place," your finger leads behind you, unreliably locating your dorm, "its on the house."
⠀⠀⠀⠀"can't deny a smoke with a pretty lady," he turned back and smiled slightly, trailing behind as you walked (desperately trying to brush of the fact that he just complimented you). the whole time you two followed the rough concrete pathway towards your dorm, it was silent. "ah, you aren't trying to kill me are you?"
⠀⠀⠀⠀you shook your hands, as well as your head, denying his (obviously sarcastic) joke, "n-no! i would never.. uhm." in response, he only chuckled, looking at the way that comment strung you nervous. nearing your dorm, you had realised how messy you left it; you were sure that if the guy stepped inside, he would only be met with cups and dishes in every corner of the room, — and what's worse — was how hot the guy was. in an attempt to distract him, you overloaded the poor guy with questions.
⠀⠀⠀⠀"what's your name?"
"suguru."
"uh huh, first or last?"
"first."
"what's your last?"
⠀⠀⠀⠀"geto- what exactly are you trying to do?"
⠀⠀⠀⠀finally getting a hold of the glass structure, designed for the crystal, underneath a pile of untouched textbooks, you threw one in his hand and continued searching for the other. "aha!" your hand shot up, clutching the twin bowl pipe, unaware of how much of a loser you looked (especially with the checkered pattern lied across your unbuttoned shirt; acting as a jacket)
PAYMENT | 6:27PM
how long had you two been wasting away on your thrifted couch? how long was this going to last? you examined his every move: following those sleepy eyes when he made even the smallest remark about your looks. he laughed, smoke dragging out his mouth. fuck, he was hot. at this point, you didn't know if it was the drugs talking or if was just, you. "sooo, how are you going to repay me?"
⠀⠀⠀⠀what was that? a fucking joke (not a good one definitely)? "thought it was on the house, doll," he took another hit — this time from your own pipe — as you palmed your forehead, "why? you looking for something else?" he blew the smoke onto the crevice between your head and shoulder. it was definitely the drugs talking. his tongue reached your neck, sending a cold shiver down your body while he lapped and sucked.
⠀⠀⠀⠀his body shifted on closer, the smell of his musk, vanilla cologne emitting from his hair. imagine how devastated your parents would be if they found out your time to time 'hobby' led to this? he was gentle with you, caressing your jaw while you felt his own creeping down your body. his unoccupied hand took out the tie in his hair, letting down the manbun that drove you crazy in the first place.
⠀⠀⠀⠀this wasn't like those wild-going porn scenes you would see online, no this was far, far more intimate (at least in your eyes). What was it about the way he touched you? Was it how confident he was; expertly navigating his way down your body? He had you clawing at his scalp, mouth crossing against your warm skin as he unbuttoned those nerdy, skinny jeans of yours.
⠀⠀⠀⠀he knelt on the carpeted floor, flashing you a comforting smile and staring up and down between your face and soaked panties, before pulling your sense of cover down. at some point when you closed your eyes or when he smiled, his lips started placing small kisses around your cunt; making you fully unravel, contorting your face at the feeling. it didn't help when he drew in your clit and soon, started dipping inside you.
⠀⠀⠀⠀"mhh.. want you suguru"
⠀⠀⠀⠀"no doll, this is only for you. not me" he mumbled, sending vibrations to your bundle of nerves. you tried to close your thighs at the sudden sensitivity, but his hands kept them open; the tip of his fingers digging into the fat of your cutis. geto wasn't the type of man to study bills and divide it with you to the dollar, you could tell he would look after you; spoiling you rotten and finishing it off with something like this.
⠀⠀⠀⠀he was driven inside, his tongue pushing against the rigid but gummy walls of your pussy until he finally found your sweet spot. the way you arched towards him was a pointer, or maybe it was when he felt how you clenched around him. he curled his tongue, shoving it deeper each time he writhed inside you.
⠀⠀⠀⠀oh my god. "f-fuck geto!" you had made an effort to push his forehead back and (fortunately) failed. his lips were glued to you, sweat from his cheeks accumulating and sticking to your legs. uncontrolled moans were escaping your throat as he pressed firmly against your g-spot and executing that last straw. you had been far gone from him; shaking as you released on his palate.
⠀⠀⠀⠀"you alright?" for some reason, there weren't any lewd thoughts in your mind. it was ust him and the way he made you feel so good. you came to the conclusion that it wasn’t the drugs, and that you has been absolutely infatuated with your client, suguru geto.
#geto x reader#geto suguru#suguru x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk smut#jjk x reader#smut with plot#jjk geto#jjk suguru#jjk geto x reader#jjk suguru x reader#most requested#࣪ ׅ prison letters ݁ ˖#fanfic#jjk x you#smut#jjk#fanfic writer
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Like A Boiled Frog (You Don't Even Scream) [ch 1]
[Next Chapter]
notes: might proofread this before i post this to ao3 but here have the raw milk version (pasteurization is for losers amaright)
series summary: every time you think things cant get any more batshit, hurricane throws another pile of guano at you. every time you think the hole cant get any deeper, you fall further. and you’re not sure what frightens you more: the town itself, or your increasing reluctance to leave.
or: au where mike has that pizza shop for wayyy more than a week and you find yourself a horror protagonist. or at least one’s love interest.
chapter summary: get haunted bitch. now go drive to utah in a manic episode. go meet a nice walking corpse, maybe it'll fix you. or make you worse. probably that second thing lmao
word count: 7985, oh dear (thats with me cutting out some stuff lol)
warnings: uh, swearing, manic behavior, self-harmful thoughts/behavior, mention of hallucinations/hearing voices, shit this is sounding bad, i mean its canon typical violence so idk man no lifeguard on duty
You know how in Source Decay, John Darnielle says / I wish the west Texas highway was a mobius strip / I could ride it out forever / when I feel my heart break? / Well, that guy’s a bitchass snake oil salesman for romanticizing this. Fuck that guy.
Although, this is the first time you’ve ever been able to set a cruise control and actually just leave it at that. What with there being no other cars on the road out here at this hour for you to run into. You even forgot about it at one point.
Little puffs of fire danced in your peripheral vision, like fairies flitting about. It was easy to spot them out in the night air, all those pumpjacks that littered the desert. There was nothing but these small fires, with the tiny, dotted additions of the glowing red eyes of windmills to light up the way for miles.
And you tried not to think about how if you broke down, no one would be around to find you. Every now and then you would startle at the shadowy specter of a tumbleweed crossing your path, but you were acutely aware of just how alone you were out here.
On that train of thought, your gaze fell to the passenger side, to the little bear toy you had buckled into a seatbelt like it was a person.
“Can you believe this, Fredbear?” you asked the inanimate object.
Fredbear did not answer, of course. Would be insane if he did, right?
Hmm …Why did part of you expect him to.
***
The august sun was beating down hot on your back as you walked home that day. It seemed like a lifetime ago, but it was only last week.
The neighborhood was as full of life as it always was. The kids running around in a game of tag, the teens playing basketball, and the adults walking their dogs. You could hear some faint music playing in the distance, most likely from the stage setup in the square downtown, not too far away.
There were many yard sales set up, it being the thing to do on a sunny Saturday afternoon like this. Despite your very strong instincts to rummage through all the boxes in these sales like a raccoon looking for dinner in a dumpster, you were broke, with no money to spare for impulse purchases on random junk. And thus, being a mature adult, you walked right past them.
That is, until a yard full of children’s toys caught your eye. One of your cousins’ kids was turning 6 in a few weeks. Might as well buy presents now before you forget again and have to rush to the store in a panic 8 minutes after the party had already started, sweat rolling down your back as you search the toy isle for something the birthday boy would like, while your phone keeps buzzing in your pocket nonstop because both your cousin is texting and your aunt is calling to ask where you’re at because you were the one who was supposed to be picking up the pizza.
I mean, just a hypothetical scenario here.
You didn’t really find anything good as you dug through the bins of miscellaneous action figures and toy cars. As you could recall, the kid really liked Iron Man right now. And sharks. Alas, you found no Iron Mans or sharks in those bins.
The other table’s baskets were full of stuffed animals. You could maybe get lucky and find a stuffed shark in there. But stuffed animals are notorious for being hard to clean; and yard sale plushies sometimes come with more than just one new friend. You weren’t about to be the reason your cousin had to fumigate her house for bedbugs. Again. So, you decided to close this case for now and skedaddle on out of there.
You took another look back at the table as you walked away.
Well.. The toys you could see at the top of the bins did look like they were well taken care of… It couldn’t hurt to just look, right?
Yeah no. You found no sharks unfortunately. What you did find, however, was this funky little teddy bear wearing a top hat and bowtie.
A real character, that one. The bright gold fabric of its body made it stand out amongst the other toys. The smile stitched onto the bear gave it a weird, smug look. And you hadn’t seen a plushy with eyebrows before.
That being said, this thing’s aura was so... unsettling. You stared into its black eyes, that seemed to stare right back at you, with a strange feeling twisting in the pit of your stomach.
“You like that one, do ya?”
You almost jumped out of your skin when the old man running the sale spoke to you. You had Not heard him come up beside you like that. Creepy.
“Yeah, it’s…” you tried to think of a positive word, “very intriguing. Looks like it’s ready for a party.”
“My granddaughter called him Fredbear. Found him over in Utah, many years back. In a yard sale, just like this one,” he gently took the bear from you, and looked down at it wistfully, “My granddaughter.. liked how smartly dressed he was. A perfect guest for her tea parties. You were right about that…”
The old man stared at the doll for a little longer after the conversation faded. You felt extremely awkward now. Perhaps you really should have just left without unearthing this obvious sentimental piece.
“My grandchildren are no longer here with me,” you felt a little uncomfortable with how he phrased that, “so, I’ll tell you what. Promise me you’ll take care of him, and he’s yours. Free of charge.”
“Oh, I couldn’t. I’d be happy to pay for him, really,” you felt bad taking free stuff from the elderly.
“No,” he said with a tone of finality, placing the bear firmly into your hands, “the day’s almost over. I’d like to help this old friend move on. It’s time.”
Well that somehow was both sweet and foreboding at the same time.
So, you thanked the old man and started back on your walk home, Fredbear cradled in your arms. He waved goodbye to you. The grandfather, of course, not the teddy bear.
You probably aren’t going to wind up giving this one to your cousin’s son. There was something about it that told you not to. Maybe it was the way the old man talked about it. You felt compelled to take care of the plush yourself. Kind of like an honor thing. Or a pity thing.
It smelled a little funky. But that’s nothing a little TLC couldn’t handle. And some dish soap.
Maybe you were just. Feeling a bit childish lately. Too small and easily broken. Moved to tears by little things that didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. Disregarded and treated like your fears weren’t real.
Deeply afraid.
Yeah, you’d give Fredbear a nice soak in the sink with a fun dish soap bubble bath. And maybe after that, you’ll both feel a little better.
You were alone in your apartment that night, as your roommate was always gone these days. And when you made your tea, you brought Fredbear a mug as well. A little tea party, for old time’s sake.
Looking back, maybe that was your first mistake.
***
Static rolled from your radio. You gave up on fiddling with it hours ago, but you’ve got nothing better to occupy your mind now.
You turned the knob absentmindedly, never really expecting to get anywhere. Or any signal, that is. A muffled country song here, the broken-up voice of a DJ there, nothing strong enough to stay for more than a few seconds. However, a few seconds of a clear transmission was all you really needed when you rolled past a certain signal.
“zZz-Hurricane—“
Now that was a word that got your attention. Not that you were anywhere near the coast at the moment. You know, unless the person reading this is looking to buy some oceanside property in Arizona. In that case feel free to slide into my DMs.
“zZZ-Peach Days! -Zz celebratio— zzZ-year—peaches peach—-ZzzZ-Heritage-zZ,” you let your gaze flicker downward, towards the dimly lit red text of the frequency number display as if that would provide some more insight.
And then suddenly, the fuzz was completely gone, as if you were near the tower itself,
“So Hurry On To Hurricane City!” the spokesman encouraged cheerfully. You could practically here the giant pageant smile in his voice as he delivered his slogan. This man was your friend, obviously. Then, however, his tone shifted as he closed the ad copy, “Because you know the party can’t start without you…”
You held your breath as the silence dragged out a few agonizing seconds, until “ZZZZZZZZ!!!”, in a jolt, the transmission went completely out. Explosively. You even flinched.
You stayed on the station for a good twenty minutes after that, waiting to see if you could hear anything again. You could feel your heart pound against your ribs until the terrifying feeling faded. There was nothing else but static, of course, and for so long you almost thought you must have imagined it. If not for the way those dull words repeated in your head, over and over.
THE PARTY CAN’T START WITHOUT YOU.
THE PARTY CAN’T START WITHOUT YOU.
THE PARTY CAN’T START WITHOUT YOU.
You hadn’t really had a destination in mind when you took off. No goal other than to get out of there as fast as you could manage. The idea of the West had been bouncing around your brain a lot lately, hence your current trajectory, but you really hadn’t had a clue where you were supposed to be going when you left.
I mean, you still didn’t have a destination. You had no clue what that advertisement was even about. Where they were even fucking talking about. Hurricane City?
Yet, somehow, you knew those words were meant for you. Not anyone else. you. There was a party and the party was waiting for you.
Guess you’d have to look for a map or something in town. Perhaps use the library computer. Man, you would regret throwing your phone into the lake in a fit of passion as you left town, but honestly, this is the longest you’ve known peace in quite some time. Just gonna have to live a little retro for a while. Not the worst thing in the world.
You’ll get a new one later, once you’ve settled in to… wherever you’re going. Whatever new home lies over that horizon for you, you guess.
The sun was breaching the beige skyline of sandy shrub brush as you finally rolled over the state line. You needed to eat. Your stomach growled loudly at just the thought. Funny. You hadn’t even thought about eating in the last.. twenty hours. Which means you should be absolutely shaking right now. Yeah, that’s why you’re shaking. That’s it. You’ll pull into the first diner you see.
You were hoping to at least be in Roswell for breakfast, but there was no way your body was going to be able to keep running if you waited that long. Looks like it’s just going to be the first place you come across.
Hopefully they don’t put green chilis in their pancakes or something.
That sounds insane but it’s an actual thing you’ve seen before in this state, trust. There are no laws nor gods when it comes to Hatch green chilis.
***
Your sleepy brain was not ready for the bell that rang as you walked through the door. Embarrassingly enough, the tinny noise startled you. You almost tripped, to be honest. Thankfully your wobbly Bambi legs held up as you managed to catch yourself.
The hostess wasn’t in sight as you awkwardly stood in the entrance, but there was a whole heap of noise coming from the kitchen.
“Hold on just a second, Sweetpea!” a voice called out to you.
Well, guess you’re holding on a second.
Your eyes scanned the top of the walls, perusing the vast cookie jar collection that the owner had accrued over the years. They were never dusted, despite being on shelves that lined the top of every wall in the tiny shack of a diner, and thus you could easily tell that a few new additions had been made. You know, because those cookie jars were way less filthy.
That’s gotta be a heath-code violation.
After you heard a bit of garbled yelling, the hostess rushed out to take her place in front of you. Smoothing down her polka-dotted apron, she grinned at you.
“Table for two?”
You blinked. It was too early in the morning for fully intelligent speech.
“Uh. No. Just me today. Thank you.”
Her big, bedazzled cat-eyeglasses fell a little farther down her nose as she scrunched her face in confusion, “alright then. Just the one of you today...”
She grabbed a paper menu as she led your shambling body to a table near the window. Which was shut away with ancient looking vinyl blinds that you were too afraid to open, lest they crumble and the cost of replacing them be put on your on tab.
She had already disappeared back into the kitchen by the time you got yourself in a seat. You glanced around the room. You weren’t the only patron here, as a few tables held a few bodies, but you were the only one without your face buried in a newspaper. And to be expected honestly, you were the youngest person in the room at seven in the morning.
The hostess, who was also the only waitress in this tiny local business, placed two glasses in front of you. The dull sound they made hitting the table drew you out of your revelry. There before you were two cups, a steaming mug of fresh coffee and a short glass of milk. You looked up in confusion.
“Don’t worry, it’s whole milk. Builds strong bones.”
That... wasn’t your concern.
You looked back at the cup in confusion and by the time you turned back, she had already moved on to the next table, refilling mugs and having loud banter with the other customers. Her regulars, by the sound of it. You felt too apathetic to try and call her over again.
You shrugged, to no one in particular, as you did not have a breakfast partner with you, despite the waitress’s insistence otherwise. Wait, was she mocking you? Eh, maybe it’s just supposed to be for the coffee. Nevertheless, you would not be drinking the milk, so you just left it there.
Despite the prevalence of the local newspaper in the room, there wasn’t a dispenser or anything at the front of the restaurant, like there usually is. As you drummed your fingers on the tablecloth, bored out of your mind, you kinda regretted throwing your phone in the lake a bit more. Maybe not the best of moves.
But hey, at least you aren’t constantly quelling the incessant buzzing you’d be hearing if you’d kept it.
You busied yourself stirring your coffee while you looked over the menu again, just for something to read. Of course, you were ordering a waffle. Because this was a diner, and, yeah, you do like waffles. And pancakes. And French toast. Doodoodoodoo can’t wait to get a mouthful.
That voice kept echoing in your mind. The party can’t start without you.
“More coffee, Babycakes?” the waitress snapped you out of your thoughts.
“Oh! Yeah, thank you,” you moved the mug to the edge of the table, closer to her, “Say… I know this is an out-of-pocket question, but have you heard anything about Hurricane City? Maybe something about peaches?”
“Oh!” she snapped her fingers, “You mean the Peach Days. It’s a little heritage festival they put on every summer in Hurricane, you know. It’s a hoot, my family makes a trip out there every few years or so for it. Not this time of course, clearly, since I’m here talkin’ to you and not in Utah—”
“In Utah?”
Of course, it was Fucking Utah again.
“I know it’s soundin’ far, but it’s only ‘bout a day’s drive from here. Two days if y’ain’t crazy about following an itinerary like my husband,” she brushed a hand over her apron before you lost her attention to the other customers, “I swear that man would plan out a schedule for every second of the day if he could…”
After she wandered off to go top off more mugs, you lamented the fact that you still hadn’t ordered yet. That’s what you get for being nosy about peach festivals, you suppose.
Thankfully though, soon enough you had your hearty breakfast and were back in front of the wheel, on your way to the friendly neighborhood Walmart. Where hopefully no cops or employees would bother you as you crashed in the parking lot.
You took Fredbear to the backseat with you for good luck. Maybe it was the gold color, or the fancy getup he had. Maybe you just needed a cuddle buddy to not feel so alone in this parking lot swarming with people.
Much to your disdain, it was now a bit into the morning hours, and the sun was fully up.
You had tried to find as shady a spot as possible, but it’s not exactly like trees grow in this biome. At least not naturally. Windbreak tree lines were definitely a thing, but those protected buildings people cared about, and this was a Walmart. Nothing around here but concrete, rocks spray painted blue, and cigarette butts.
So after tossing and turning in the bright blinding sunshine for way longer than you should have, and making promises to higher deities was proven to be unfruitful in your attempt to find some semblance of peace, you finally just had to admit defeat. And here by rescinding any aforementioned promises to higher powers.
You laid Fredbear back down on the seat and tucked him in with the blanket when you got back up. At least one of you could be cozy and well rested. Unfortunately, it wasn’t going to be you, however.
Well, it’s far from the first all-nighter you’ve pulled without having time to take a nap during the following day. Sleep deprivation isn’t real, silly. Teachers just made that up to scare you. It’ll be fine.
***
You know you never really realize how much we structure our lives around other humans until you take a drive through the middle of nowhere. How essential it is to have enough gas to make it to the next town. From town to town, your life becomes segments. Only within the eyesight of other humans are you ever safe. Only within the bounds of the settlement can your soul be settled.
Gas stations become oases. Which is the plural of oasis, apparently. Anyway, you start seeing them like mirages. Dingey, weather-worn gas pumps become as good as a sparkling illusion of precious water in the Sahara. The empty shells of buildings you passed by, long since forgotten, became like mausoleums in these graveyard towns. Villages. Hamlets. Mostly hamlets.
“Are we there yet?” a small and very annoyed voice called out.
You had just written it off as your imagination until you heard the noise of shuffling fabric. Normally your audio hallucinations aren’t that detailed. Paralyzed, you held your breath, not daring to make any noise that would distract your ears from hearing whoever, whatever, was in the back seat. Your mind went to stories of skinwalkers and misshapen monsters and hitch-hiking serial killers.
“… Are we there yet?” the voice repeated, admittedly sounding even smaller to you now.
Yep, that’s a real person alright. Or a real thing. Your eyes were probably bloodshot from the way you haven’t blinked this entire time, just staring straight ahead on the desert highway. Taking a deep, shaky breath to steady yourself, you turned down the rear-view mirror…
Christ almighty. You had a stowaway.
Your stomach turned immediately. God, come on now, don’t puke up what little you had on your stomach. You need that.
“Hey Buddy,” you tried to sound as friendly as you could, “What’s your name?”
Clad in a little striped shirt and cargo shorts, he started kicking his feet in impatience, which would be cute if it weren’t for this situation y’all are in, and the adrenaline pumping through your veins, “We’ve been in here forever,” he whined.
If this was a skinwalker, he was a pretty darn adorable one. And definitely not a hitch-hiking serial killer. At least you hoped. But no, this was a greater form of terror: responsibility.
“Haha, yeah, we have been in here really long, haven’t we? How long do you think we’ve been driving, can you tell me?”
When did you pick up this child. When you got gas in Gallup? Albuquerque? Dear lord, if he’s been in here since Roswell, you’re about to have the world’s biggest headache on your hands, both metaphorically and physically. But there’s no way he’s been in here for fucking 10 hours, right? right??
Okay, okay. Maybe you’re just a little panicky right now and not thinking straight. Maybe teachers hadn’t been making up sleep deprivation just to scare you after all. You have been purposely not drinking anything for the lack of available restrooms. People get dehydration hallucinations, right?
The boy just stared at you, blankly. Probably fully realizing you were a stranger and not whoever he thought you were. In lieu of answering you, he started fidgeting more with the toy bear you had had in the back. You really hoped that hadn’t been what lured him into your station wagon in the first place.
Don’t be getting shy on me now, kid.
You put your blinker on, ready to merge off the road and onto an incoming rest-stop that you thanked your lucky stars for.
“Honey, can you tell me what your phone number is?”
He looked up at you, finally tearing his attention from the bear, and you could see gears turning in his head.
“…435-555-1987?”
You repeated it back to him, and he nodded. Alright, time to find that payphone.
Said rest-stop payphone was thankfully near a picnic table so you could sit him down and be able to watch him carefully the whole time you made this call. Because judging by the fact this situation was happening at all, he was a slippery one.
You got out of the car and opened the back door, but he was hesitant to get out. Which, fair, you are a stranger trying to get him to a second location.
“What’s up, Bud?” you tried your hardest to not sound like a predator but boy was that a real nebulous idea, wasn’t it?
“Fredbear wants to come too,” he mutters.
“Well, sure then, let’s bring him, we’ll have a little picnic.” With no food, but hey, whatever lie it takes to get him sitting on that bench.
It was really cute the way the kid set the bear down on the table and positioned it like they were going to have a picnic together. When you find this kid’s parents, you’ll let him keep Fredbear. Toys like it when they’re given to new children, right? Wasn’t there a movie about that or something. Wincing at the grubbiness of the payphone, you reluctantly dialed the number.
“Hello, Jeff’s Pizza on Main St, are you ready to order?”
You closed your eyes, counting the seconds as you breathed in for 4 seconds, held it for 7, and released for 8.
“Hello? Are you there?”
“Yes!” you practically shouted into the receiver. So much for calming down, “please don’t hang up,” you pleaded.
“Listen, we don’t take solicitation,”
“No, uh, sorry. I’ve found a lost child who told me this was his number. Is the owner of this restaurant by chance frantically looking for their son?”
You heard some muffled conversation happening behind the phone, “Well, no, I don’t even have any kids… and I uh, am currently understaffed. Im the only one here.”
you cursed under your breath.
“Uh, alright, well…” you could tell this was getting really awkward for him.
“Could you tell me where y’all are, I’m unfamiliar with the area code,”
“Uh, Hurricane, Utah?”
… If you weren’t on the phone, you fucking swear you’d be screeching at the top of your lungs like a chimpanzee right now.
“Thank you, you know, just in case he’s just remembering an advertisement he’s seen or something,”
“Oh, okay,” there was a pause, “well I hope you find the parents or, whoever,”
“Thank you,” you’ll put him out of his misery and hang up.
“Are you sure that’s your number, Hon?”
“Uh-huh,”
“Why don’t you tell me it again, maybe I dialed it wrong,”
“435-5--” his face scrunched up in concentration, “435-555—I don’t know…”
You tried not to look visibly stressed at this answer.
“Do you know where you live?”
He moved the bears paws along with whatever little game he was playing, before looking up at you, head tilted in confusion, “Hurricane?”
Okay. Police time. If not for him, for you. The skinwalker possibility just went back up. Because, honestly, he had to have gotten in your car as a coyote or something. No way you wouldn’t’ve noticed a whole ass child entering your car.
“How does ice cream sound, huh Buddy?”
“I want ice cream!” he said hastily as if you’d change your mind if he hesitated.
“Ice cream it is then, but only if you’re good for me and the officers, okay? And tell them everything you can remember. You’re smart, right?”
“Uh-huh,”
“Great,” you smiled over clenched teeth.
After herding him back into the car, you had to take a moment to gently rest your head into the steering wheel. And it took everything within you to not smash said head into it. Or scream in agony. No, no, we mustn’t scare the child.
Tuba City wasn’t too far away. The police station was downtown, as most are. Luckily, across the street there was a paleteria with a courtyard area. The little guy got very excited when you got pulled into the parking space, so eh, what the hell, ice cream first. Maybe after a treat and some playtime in the courtyard he won’t be as wiggly and will be able to tell the cops what he knows about just where the hell he came from.
The noise of the bell chiming made you flinch as you two walked into the paleteria. You hadn’t thought you were that tightly wound right now but apparently you were wrong. The lady behind the counter greeted you warmly, and you responded in turn, trying to play it cool.
God, imagine if she got an off-vibe from you and the kid and called over the police from across the street before you even have a chance—
Deep breath. Okay. The kid you had started referring to in your head as just “Little Boy” was leaned against the display case, his breath fogging up the glass in front of him and probably leaving little handprints for the shopkeeper to clean later.
“I’m sorry about that,”
“That’s… Okay. What can I get you?” she seemed a little confused. Strange, but you brushed past it just as quickly as she did.
“Ah, what do we want?” you asked Little Boy.
He excitedly tugged on your pantleg and pointed to the popsicle he wanted, looking up at you with puppy dog eyes. He doesn’t need to convince you, but you quickly realized you were not going to be able to say no to any else after this if he deployed the same cute begging look.
“One of those cute little Tweety Bird faces,” you pointed.
“Anything else?” she handed you the popsicle and you gingerly took it.
“Nah, that’s it” you were too nauseous to eat right now.
You paid, throwing the change into the tip jar, and turned to give Little Boy the popsicle she handed you. The words caught in your throat as you looked down to find your pantleg absent of any tugging by any Little Boy. You quickly scanned the tiny paleteria. He was nowhere to be found, anywhere in the room.
“Uh, did you see where the kid went?” you tried not to sound too panicked.
She was taken aback, also quickly looking around the room to find no one, before shaking her head, “Did you have a kid with you?”
You furiously nodded in confusion,
“I’m sorry, then I didn’t see them,” she pointed to the glass door that led to the courtyard only a few feet away from y’all, “Try outside, maybe?”
You burst outside, searching the area in a panic, but you couldn’t see him anywhere. Not hidden in the tangle of the garden, not splashing around in the fountain, not at, under, on top of, or around any of the tables.
You went to call his name, but your voice caught in your throat when you realized you didn’t have a name to call. And.
And.
Something hit your shirt. A water droplet. You looked up into the clear, blinding blue sky. Your nerves tickled as another droplet ran down your cheek. Oh, you were crying. Huh.
You took the closet seat you could find, counting the things processed by your 5 senses. It’s all you could do to not start bawling for no reason. Maybe you’ll calm down and be able to think straight soon.
Why can’t you think straight? Everything feels so fuzzy.
You should be terrified, and in a way, you were. In your heart of hearts, you knew the truth: Little Boy wasn’t real. Or at least turned back into a coyote and ran off.
As you stared vacantly into the open air, you realized you still had a dripping popsicle in your hands. Supposedly “Tweety Bird” shaped, it just looked like a yellow skull missing its mandible bone to you. How fitting.
You pulled it to your mouth. Yum. Tasted like AAAAAAAA. Or orange, according to the package.
Attempting to lick the melted yellow liquid off of your hand, you accidentally stuck the ice pop on your face. Great. Now you’re sticky all over.
God, you’ve really gone and lost your fucking marbles this time, haven’t you.
There was a bulletin kiosk a few feet down your field of vision. On that bulletin kiosk was an old poster, barely visible as it was buried under layers of other flyers. It caught your eye and seemed to burn your retinas. What little you could see was the word Freddy and part of what looked like a version of the bear you’d been toting around this whole little expedition, but that was enough.
Something clicked. You looked down at the bear hanging by your side in your other hand. The kid had shoved it into your arms so he could more easily lean on the display case, right before he disappeared the very moment you took your eyes off of him.
You know, you hadn’t really felt alone since bringing Fredbear home. And not in a good way.
Guess the name you should’ve been calling was Freddy.
You had to get rid of that bear.
***
You had been walking home like you always did, same route. But you noticed something peculiar about this time. The house that the old man had his yard sale in was now stripped of all decoration, with a For Sale sign proudly standing in the grass. No cars, and no blinds or curtains on the windows, so you could see into the den which was now devoid of any furniture.
You’ll admit it, you crept around to the other windows, searching for any signs of life at all in the empty rooms. None. No furniture, no people, no trash. The yard sale was yesterday. How did they clean this place out so thoroughly in the short amount of time between when you’d seen it last and now.
A little confuddled, you went home as usual. While strange as hell, this wasn’t a missing person’s case or anything. And it’s probably why the man was so adamant on giving you Fredbear because it was the end of the day. He had a deadline. He was skipping town.
God, you wished you could just skip town.
You frankly thought nothing of it when you unlocked the door to your apartment to see Fredbear was already seated on the couch, like he was all set to marathon whatever 30-year-old cartoon you wound up watching that night. And it’s not like your roommate hadn’t done something like this before, move a stuffed animal or action figure into a funny position for you to find later.
You hadn’t seen him much lately. Or like, at all. The only reason you knew he was still alive were the dirty dishes in the sink, dirty clothes on the floor of the bathroom, and the aforementioned moving the bear around.
Looking back now, was he moving the bear around?
If you locked the deadbolt that can’t be unlocked from the outside, you’d be guaranteed to catch him in person for once. But you weren’t willing to go through the trouble and emotional toil of doing that, however.
In the name of feeling less like a ghost haunting your own home, getting yelled at for intentionally locking your roommate out might be a wee bit counterproductive. Sure, you’d be seen and spoken to, but the harshness of his words and tone would send you into a worse episode than you were already in.
Well, at least Fredbear seemed ready to keep you company tonight...
The fact that they put unskippable advertisements on streaming services you’re paying for in the first place is criminal. Or at least regular cable tv in a trenchcoat.
You got a drink while they prattled on about luxury cars you couldn’t afford and real estate companies you weren’t going to have the privilege of patroning any time soon. Embarrassingly, as you poured the pitcher of water into a glass, you got a little distracted.
The cheap glass’s glass was only about a millimeter or two thick. You could easily just crush this cup in your hand, in one swift movement. The muscles of your arm began tensing up at the thought.
But thankfully, a loud, blaring advertisement coming from the TV snapped you out of it. And so, you promptly decided to Not Do That, because picking all of those tiny glass shards out of your flesh would be a bitch. And that was not how you wanted to spend a perfectly good Sunday night. And of course you didn’t need the questions at work tomorrow.
You returned to the couch, curiously, and you swear, that damn teddy bear followed you with its eyes. Even though they were a shiny, solid black, and the idea itself would be insane.
As you settled back down, you grabbed the remote to turn down the volume of the cheery music playing. Mysteriously, it wasn’t just a commercial with bad sound mixing, the TV itself had been turned up. Now that it had your attention, the thing that was being sold to you seemed to the state of Utah. You know, those Visit [X] ads that were commonly played between cooking shows and ghost hunting documentaries.
“Oh hey, you’re from there, right?” you poked at fredbear. And immediately felt pathetic. God, you’ve got to stop talking to inanimate objects and like get a boyfriend or something. Geez.
The imagery on the screen was just, you know, normal southwest stock footage:
A drone shot of Zion national park
Old men golfing
Owls living in holes they’ve dug into cactuses
Rock archways
A family laughing as they shared a pizza being served to them by a man in a bear suit that looked just fredbear,
“Oh, well there you are, I guess.” you once again absent-mindedly spoke to your toy friend.
Kids swimming in a fancy resort pool
A Navajo cultural event
More rock archways and red sandstone cliffs
Kids crowding around a claw machine filled with toys just like the one sitting next to you
Kids crowding around a stage as an animatronic band played
Kids crowding around a birthday cake, the light of candles bouncing off their faces as they sang along…
The fake sounding voice of the announcer rung out, “Visit Utah! You know the party can’t start without you!”
Your mouth felt dry. Good thing you now had that glass of water.
***
Of course, you did what any smart, sane person would do and feverishly ripped through the layers of old flyers to get to the advertisement for what you now knew was Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza Place. A themed diner and nickel arcade that made most of their money hosting birthday parties, by the looks of it. You knew the type; you had been an American child once too.
Good thing none of the cops were hanging around outside to fine you for littering, because the amount of paper you just released into the breeze was in fact criminal.
There was a short list of locations at the bottom of the poster. They had a few scattered over Utah, or at least they used to, judging by the harsh weathering of this poster. The closest one being in Bigwater, explaining why this poster was out here in Tuba. But the word Hurricane stood out to you like it was lit up in neon. It burned like sunlight.
It appears you are in fact on your way to Hurricane, Utah. As if you didn’t know that already at this point, you being out on the canyon rim instead of your much preferred and beloved Rockies. Well, congratulations bitch. You’ve only got another three hours to go. Better get going. Have fun!
***
Oh, this place was creepy as hell. Or it’s just late at night, and you’re sleep deprived and paranoid. In the spirit of being honest to yourself, ‘sleep deprived and paranoid’ has always been your natural state of being, but right now it’s definitely ramped up to an eleven.
But even though it’s been close to 48 hours since your last brain-reset, this place still had a certain energy about it. Like New Orleans, or the woods around lynching bridges did. That spooky oh I am Not Safe here type of energy.
The gas station-man gave you a real weird look when you stormed in and asked where the Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza Place was. Normally you would’ve chalked it up to you being a clear foreigner asking for directions as if it’s 1995, to a children’s arcade close to midnight nonetheless, but now you weren’t so sure.
You eyed the fridge full of wine in pint sized bottles and little juice cartons. But nah, you probably needed to have a quick reaction time to whatever was waiting for you in this Venus flytrap you’re willingly walking into. You grabbed a Monster instead and you know what, yeah, that probably wasn’t the best decision either. If you weren’t high strung before, you definitely were now. You felt like you could punch a bear. A Freddy Fazbear.
You bought a local map alongside the energy drink, feeling like you were gonna need it. Man, low-tech was actually kinda annoying after a while. You got the gas station-man to begrudgingly mark Fazbear’s down onto it for you. Apparently, it and all other locations within town had closed down some twenty years ago. Not many people are still around who remember why, he said, but it had something to do with the faulty animatronics. Teenagers told ghost stories and dared each other to spend the whole night in the dining room. But otherwise, beyond the rumors, the original Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza Place was just an empty, scorched building. And the other various locations like Jr’s or Circus Baby’s had been sold off, passing so many hands who knows what businesses were in there now. But you could still kinda tell, if you paid attention, in the same way you can tell if something used to be a Pizza Hut.
What you really wanted, according to gas station-man, whose nametag read Gary, was this new location that was opening soon, simply named Freddy’s Pizzeria. It’s set to open for business in September, so you’re lucky. He marked it one your map as well.
You don’t know why Gary was so nice to you. Maybe it was the harrowed look in your eyes. Maybe it was the twitchiness. Maybe Gary is just very bored of this tourist town and was looking to fall madly in love with a random troubled soul he met at midnight in a gas station and would wind up running away with to some far-off place. If that was the case, sorry Gary. You were too busy with the metaphorical torture labyrinth to care about romance at the moment.
You couldn’t decide if the haunted Fredbear would want to see an old location or the new one. You asked, but of course the fucker didn’t answer. Just sat there with his smug grin and glassy eyes that followed your hand movements. So, you quite literally tossed a coin. A new mint, the face side had Eleanor Roosevelt on it. And she marked the fact that you were going to try the new location first, and then try the original building next. Cool.
***
Your patience was kinda at its limit here, you’ll admit. You really should get some sleep soon. Or eat. Since you were hellbent on getting here and nothing else, the only thing on your stomach besides that wretched Tweety Bird popsicle is half a monster energy. Guess you’ll go by a fucking Denny’s after this. If you survive.
If you were going to die horrifically, you’d really rather the forces that be make it snappy. This was getting ridiculous.
You pulled into the parking lot. The building clearly wasn’t new but had been freshly painted. Nothing creepy so far. As you stared down the building, sizing it up, you noticed there was one car parked in the front, and a few of the windows were lit up.
Cool, so there was someone in there. Great. That makes, well whatever this is, much harder.
The door was locked.
You could hear music playing from inside. You banged on the door as loudly as you could manage, and it still took a couple of minutes before the music stopped. And then a very disgruntled man in coveralls was in the doorway, tiredly asking just what the fuck you wanted at this time of night.
He smiled to cover up his rudeness, but the smile stretched a little too wide, inhumanly wide, and a shiver ran down your spine.
You took him in, unashamedly raking your eyes over his form. He stood awkwardly, as if ready to bolt at any moment. What you could see of his build made him out to be weirdly skinny. That unnaturally wide smile gave way to some exposed teeth on the left side of his face. His eyes were shadowed by his bangs in the backlight of the door, but you swore they almost glowed themselves. His complexion was greyish and bordered on almost purple in this lighting.
Despite all this, he was still pretty handsome. Well, you did always think some of those creepypasta guys were boyfriend material. Maybe, you wouldn’t mind getting chopped up into little pieces if this guy was the one doing it. Okay, and maybe you’ve been sleeplessly chasing ghosts too long.
Startling you, he reached his hand to grab your shoulder, a little too fast.
“Hey mate, are you okay?” He asked nervously,
It snapped you out of your stupor, realizing you had yet to say a word to him, “Uh, yes, I just wanted to…”
How do you even fucking ask this. “Hey, can I bring a stuffed bear to your dining room so maybe it’s spirit will leave me alone? Maybe conduct a séance or something?” Seriously, did you even know what you were doing here? Shit. Okay.
“I wanted to ask if I could check out your facility?” came out like a question because even you had no clue what you were saying.
“Come back tomorrow in the daylight, then,” he began closing the door, shaking his head in annoyance, “or perhaps when we’re actually open.”
“NO!” you slammed your foot into the door as he closed it, “AAGH!”
“Jesus Christ! WHY.”
Dear lord, this man now 100% thinks you’re a crackhead.
“Just, don’t close that door, okay,” his brows scrunched together as you grit your teeth to swallow down the pain, “I need you to help me.”
“I really don’t have any money to spar--”
“I’M HERE BECAUSE OF A GHOST,” you interrupted. Finally, you managed to get that out somehow, if nonsensical.
A look of recognition flickered in his glowing eyes. He lowered into your space, kind of intimidatingly. Or intimately. Yeah, no, this was hostile, don’t fool yourself.
“What kind of ghost,” he asked suspiciously.
“Uh,” shit, okay, “the weird, haunted doll kind? Uh, like the ones the McElroy brothers are always bidding on on eBay. Or maybe this is kind of a Ben Drowned kinda situation, I’m not completely sure.”
He blinked, “okay, I only understood a few of those words, but—”
“It’s a Freddy teddy bear that really wanted me to take it to Hurricane, okay?” You really were at the end of your rope at the moment, “I have literally driven here for days straight on no sleep and barely any food and I need this Unauthorized Fucking Thing to find it’s eternal peace or kill me in some horrible way so I can hurry up and get on with my goddamn life,”
“Uh, see… the thing is,” he started to retreat back again, slowly moving his hands like he was trying to calm down a spooked animal.
You realized what was about to happen, and it must have been visible in your eyes, since his huge unnatural placating smile returned,
“I actually don’t want anything to do with that, sooo…”
“PLEASE—” you reached out in blind panic, but he dodged it. (now if only you could’ve dodged the scooper like that Mikey)
The door slammed in your face.
Your breathing was ragged and fogged up the glass as he locked it again. You stared up at those glowing pinprick pupils of his as he gave you an apologetic little wave goodbye. And then he fucking made a big show of pointing at the closed sign before turning tail to disappear back into the darkness of the empty restaurant.
Okay.
Just a little setback. You’ll go to the older location first, now, and come back when this asshole is sleeping. Can’t be too hard to bust out one of those windows, and you doubt he has an alarm set up already. It’s his fault, really. If he didn’t want property damage, then he should’ve just let you in. Not like you haven’t warned him that you were desperate or anything.
Just gonna go to the other location. You’ve got your map, you’ve got a tank full of gas, and you’ve got chutzpah.
Now what you don’t have? Is a car that will start.
#michael afton x reader#mike shmidt x reader#fnaf x reader#fnaf#michael afton#michael afton x male reader#i mean its gender neutral but just so my fellow boys know it's safe here. there will be no 'sweet girl' ever. god.#fnaf fanfic#five nights at freddy's#my writing#i dont even remember how to tag these things anymore lol
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