#this is probably all for now im kinda going through it rn im tired

[arundolyn]

"Oh, this? Don't be ridiculous! It's not a marriage certificate! Look closely, okay? Throw away all your hangups, and simply do what you feel. Aren't you just dying to sign it? Won't it feel good? 3... 2... 1... sign!"

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

.

[beomiracles]

HI SERENE!! i’ve been reading your works for months now and ive never sent in a request before but im on my period rn and im so so horny 😭 i was just scrolling on tumblr and i had this thought of beomgyu being a panty stealer. like beomgyu being your roommate would steal your underwear and masturbate and cum on then and when you finally piece everything together he fucks your brains out repeatedly all over your guys’ apartment and then would steal your underwear each time adding to his collection. and the thing is he’d probably buy you more just so he could steal them again lol

i can’t wait until next week when this torture ends 😭

⌞ 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓'𝐒 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒 ⌝

DREAM RECALL it was no secret that your roommate was behind your panties going missing. You had just never expected to be so turned on by the whole ordeal.

wc -> 2.6k

pairings non-idol!beomgyu x afab!reader warnings big time perv!beomgyu, beomgyu steals readers panties, reader kinda watches him get off for a moment, oral (f. rec), face sitting, cum eating, hm think that's it !

#serene adds ✎... you guys are so freaky...I love it ◟( ˃̶͈◡ ˂̶͈ )◞ I live for the perv!beomgyu agenda, and I will die on this hill. Praying your period will go away quickly because that shit sucks </3 this is not proofread I'm super tired heh

You don’t know when it started.. Actually it might have been around a month ago. It was subtle at first, almost unnoticeable, but as time went on you started realizing that your underwear pile would shrink with each wash. In the beginning it was only the simple ones, the ones that didn’t stick out, the ones he thought he could get away with. It was almost endearing, how slick he thought he was being.

But last week is when the theft made your eyebrows raise. Your roommate had snatched your most expensive piece of lingerie, not to mention, your favorite. Honestly you didn’t know if you should consider him brave or stupid, but as you watched him try and act normal with you during dinner, you settled on the latter. 

Perhaps it should’ve creeped you out, your roommate that you’d known for less than six months, stealing your panties doing god knows what with them. But it didn’t. In fact you would be lying if you said that it didn’t turn you on, just a little. And though you had never actually seen or heard him, you could only guess what he used them for. Your mind easily conjured images of him, sprawled on his bed with your used underwear hovering above his face, inhaling your scent as he fucked himself dumb on his hand. 

Choi Beomgyu and you had quickly become good friends after getting an apartment together not far from campus. You often helped one another with your studies and walked to class hand in hand almost every morning. — It was an acquaintance that had sparked out of pure convenience, fortunately blooming into a great friendship, but now it was slowly distorting into something far more intimate as Beomgyu seemed unable to keep his perverted antics at bay. You often went out with friends, leaving him to roam the apartment, which he did, your room seemingly his main target. And this night was no different. 

It’s well past midnight and in your tipsy state, you struggle to jiggle the keys into the lock. Finally stumbling inside the small hallway, you shut the door behind you, albeit somewhat louder than you’d aimed for. You tiptoe through the dark living room, almost hitting your leg on the dresses between the two doors leading to your bedrooms. With a hushed curse you reach for the door handle only to realize that you wouldn’t have to. Because your door was already open. 

That was weird, you always made sure to close it. With the nudge of your foot, it glides further open, revealing your dark and empty room. Thinking no less of the unusual occurrence, you strip yourself off your clothes as you get ready for bed. But then there it is again, another anomaly. — You could have sworn that you made your bed in the morning, yet the sheets were rustled, your pillow moved, almost as if someone had slept in here. And upon touching the flimsy blanket, you find that it’s still warm. 

Odd. Your room smelled an awful lot like Beomgyu. 

⋮

You thought that perhaps he might come clean, confess his perverted behavior or even his underlying feelings. But he never did. Another week passed and by now you were starting to run low on underwear. — You decided that if he wasn’t going to out himself, then you would simply have to catch him in the act. Easy enough, right? 

Your fingers graze across the smooth silk of the many pieces presented before you. Reds, pinks, even some blues, you thought long and hard about what to get; even asking a worker to colormatch you. In the end you decided on a white lace set, it was accompanied by a few pink bows. It was perfect. — You felt pretty in it, very pretty. And as you twirl in front of your mirror, your stomach tingles in anticipation. 

Beomgyu wasn’t very smart, at least not when it came to you. It was easy to trick him into believing that you’d be gone for the evening. What wasn’t so easy was squeezing yourself into the tight space of your closet. Crammed between heaps of clothing and a few boxes you had yet to unpack, it was uncomfortable to say the least. However, the sound of your bedroom door creaking open not even fifteen minutes after you heard the front door shut, made it all worth it. 

He’s quiet, funnily enough, you wondered why, it wasn’t like there was supposed to be anyone home. Yet he silently shuts the door behind him, carefully walking over to your dresser as he slides his fingers across the painted wood. — The small crack the closet allowed made for a narrow view but you could clearly make out the way he rummaged through your top drawer, seemingly familiar with where you kept your panties. “What a freak”, you thought, yet your heartbeat picked up as you watched him find a pair he liked, bringing the fabric to his nose as his eyes fluttered closed. 

You watch as he throws a glance toward your bed, the duvet neatly folded, just like you always left it. Then he makes his way over and your jaw slacks as you realize just what was going on. As if the scent of your panties wasn’t enough, he lets his head fall to the side as he inhales the fragrance of your pillow. Sprawled on top of your mattress, the sheets rustle beneath him as he shifts slightly. 

Your eyes remain glued to his figure, unable to tear them away as his hand slides down his chest, dipping beneath his sweats as he slowly strokes his cock. You knew that your roommate was up to some perverted shit when he thought you didn't know, but actually seeing it happen, and in your room, on your bed, it made everything so very real. — He traps his bottom lip between his teeth, emitting a soft groan as his thigh twitches. His free hand has your panties captured in a tight grip as he keeps them to his nose, inhaling your scent with each breath. 

Too caught up in the way Beomgyu was touching himself before your very eyes, you almost forget that you were supposed to catch him. Blinking, you give yourself a small mental slap for getting so distracted. He was a sick freak, that’s right, and you were about to confront him. With one final deep breath, you push the closet door open. It makes a creaking noise but he doesn’t seem to hear it. Too lost in his own pleasure, his head thrown back as his hand worked up and down his cock. 

“I washed those sheets yesterday.” 

The small comment echoes out through your room like that of a church bell and Beomgyu immediately freezes as his head jerks up. The hand down his pants quickly withdraws as he clumsily tries to hide your panties behind his back, pressing himself against the headboard to get as far away from you as possible. His prominent Adam's apple bobs as he swallows and you find your gaze lingering on the small movement as you bite your lip. 

“I thought you were… you”, he trails off, biting the inside of his cheek as his face flares up in all shades of red, beyond embarrassed over the situation in which you’d caught him in. You shake your head, biting back the grin threatening to spread across your lips. — “I wasn’t, it wasn’t.. I mean I didn’t..” He blabbers, trying to come up with excuses and lies to cover his evident crime. 

“I know you’ve been stealing my panties.” You shrug, feigning indifference as your eyes drop to the hand behind his back. He opens his mouth to say something but you beat him to it, “why didn’t you just tell me?” — You swallow, hesitating for a moment before continuing, “I mean, isn’t the real deal better?” 

He frowns, sitting up straighter as he tries clearing his throat. “The real deal..?” He mumbles, though his words soon fall short as his gaze drops to the way you hike your skirt above your stomach, revealing the new lace set you had bought solely for this occasion. — Beomgyu lets out a strangled noise from somewhere in the back of his throat, squirming on the mattress as his eyes glue to the way your panties hug your figure. 

“What the fuck”, is all he says, his sentence coming out as a short breath, his gaze momentarily flitting back up to yours before drifting down again. You quickly realized that your plan didn’t exactly go further than this and that now you had absolutely no clue of what to do. Had it been a bad idea? Should you have just confronted him about it like a normal person? But his next words make all your doubts vanish. 

“Come here”, his voice is hoarse as he beckons you over. Your feet move on their own, and soon you find yourself crawling over the soft mattress in order to reach Beomgyu. You think that he might say something, anything to ease the tension between the two of you. — Instead he presses his lips against yours, albeit hesitantly, but it’s still a kiss, and an urgent one at that. The second he feels you respond against him, he pulls you closer, tongue pushing inside your mouth in a matter of seconds. 

His hands roam your skimpily dressed figure, bunching your skirt up high above your waist as his fingers twiddle the fabric of your lingerie. Resisting the urge to grind yourself onto his thigh, your legs rub together as you try to alleviate the ache building in your core. It was almost as if he could read your mind as he pulled back, his lips trailing along your jaw in a sloppy manner, his hair tickling your face as he went. 

“I want you to sit on my face.” 

You stilled at his blunt request, fingers halting on his shoulders as you swallowed. “S-Sit on your face?” You wondered if perhaps you had misinterpreted his words but Beomgyu quickly nods, pulling back as his tongue darts out to glide across his already glistening lips. “I…o-okay”, you meekly agree. 

That was how you found yourself hovering above him, gripping the headboard tightly as you bit the inside of your cheek. Beomgyu’s hands slid along your thighs, his hungry gaze unwavering as he eyed your drenched cunt, arousal seeping through the far too thin fabric of your new panties. — “Sit down, please”, he whispers, the hands on your thighs tugging you toward his face and you slowly comply. 

His mouth is warm against your clothed core as he practically kisses it. Teeth grazing across the wet material before he pulls it into his mouth. You hear him groan and for a moment you think you might be too heavy but he only urges you closer, his sharp nose prodding against your covered clit and you whine as your fingers on the headboard turn white. 

“You smell so good”, he grunts as he pushes your lingerie to the side, inhaling your now very prominent scent once more. His comment should not have made you throb the way you did, and you let out a small noise of surprise as his tongue drags across your folds, pushing between them to prod at your clenching hole. — It wasn’t like you hadn’t been eaten out before, but the way Beomgyu sighs against your cunt as he savors each droplet of your wetness feels new and foreign. 

His fingers dig into the flesh of your thighs with so much force that it might’ve hurt had it not been for his eager mouth that latched on to your clit. The squelching sound of him pushing his tongue as far inside of you as he possibly could fills your ears, it feels dirty, but at the same time you never think you’d felt more empowered. You glance down to where his face lay buried between your legs, his brows knitting together as he focuses completely on making you feel good, a sheen layer of sweat forming on his forehead. 

One of your trembling hands leaves the headboard as you reach down to gently brush a strand of hair from his eyes. The very same eyes that flicker up to meet your own as you do. Your mouth falls open at the recognition in his gaze and you feel yourself throb around his tongue as you fight to stay composed. — “You’re so pretty”, his words are muffled against your cunt, the movement of his lips making you squirm on top of him. 

His hands move from your thighs to rest on the curve of your ass, rubbing the flesh there before squeezing it softly as he tugs you closer. “Beomgyu I-I’m” your sentences come out jagged and interrupted by the breathless moans being pulled from your throat but Beomgyu seems to catch on, his tongue shifting to flick at your throbbing clit. — “Need to taste you”, he groans, his lips against yours moving with far more urgency than just seconds prior. 

When your orgasm hit it felt as if you were floating, your body weighed nothing but the world was also on your shoulders all at once. Beomgyu’s face almost became one with your cunt as he lapped up every single droplet of your high, letting you coat both his nose and chin in slick as he moaned against your core. 

Once your thighs finally stopped trembling did you try and move off of him, only to be stopped by his hands still firmly gripping your ass. “Wait”, he breathes, leaning to press a few feathery kisses to your inner thighs as his fingers hooked around the lining of your panties, slowly tugging them down. — He helps you strip out of the flimsy garment as he lays you down flat on your back. 

The white lace gripped tightly in his fist, he raises it to his nose as he inhales your scent all over again. “Fucking hell”, he mumbles gaze flitting between your used lingerie and your wide eyes as you peer up at him. “Mind if I keep these?” He asks, letting the piece of clothing dangle in front of your face with a small smirk. Quickly nodding, you gasp as you feel the tip of his cock rub against your already sensitive cunt. 

“One more?” He pouts before leaning in to press a chaste kiss to your lips. 

⋮

You lost count of how many times Beomgyu brought you to an orgasm that night, and the night after that, and the one after that. The days almost blended together as you spent the majority of them wrapped in his warm embrace. It didn’t matter where or when, the kitchen, the shower, on the couch, his bed, your bed… And Beomgyu would always make sure to get something out of each occurrence. 

“Open it”, he motions toward the small box currently placed on your lap. Your fingers pull at the small ribbon holding it together before carefully lifting the lid. Unable to hide the small huff of disbelief as your eyes fall on the piece of silk inside. — “Really?” You ask as you bring the dark red panties up. But Beomgyu only smirks as he leans closer, one of his hands sliding along your thigh. 

“Yeah, why not? You’re gonna look so fucking sexy in it.” — You raise a questioning brow as you snatch the lingerie from his reaching hand, “you bought this for yourself, didn’t you?” He only shrugs, a sly smirk tugging on his lips. 

“Can you blame me?”

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[whywhaatt]

"hey i'm bored" (isaacwhy x reader)

-

word count: 2.028

warnings: smut, unprotected sex, hand kink(kinda), degrading, light choking

a/n: this is my first fic😜 i didnt proof read it yet so hopefully i didn't misspell anything too badly

-

10 hours. 10 hours of sitting at this desk and playing on my computer. I've gone through almost every app or game that I have downloaded. I've checked every social media, watched the newest uploads of my friends, and I even read a random wikipedia article. It's around 2am now. I need to go to sleep. After turning off my computer, and taking my headset off and hanging it on the monitor, I walk towards my bed and grab my phone from my nightstand.

1:59 AM... god damn. I gotta fix my sleep schedule. Nahhh I know I won't. The lack of sleep is kicking in, it feels like 5 minutes go by of me just staring at my lock screen. Turns out it was just 30 seconds cus my phone automatically turned off. It takes me a minute to realize it, but the only reason I do is cus a notification pops up.

"wassup" - isaac💀

tf... it's 2am?!? Why is he texting me?

~

isaac: wassup

me: heyy

isaac: sorry it's late. im bored

me: bro i just laid down💀💀

isaac: can i come over? larry and tanner and annoying tf outa me rn

me: telling them you said that🗣️🗣️

isaac: bro pls. ion know if it's cus im tired but y'know how it is. i just need to get out of the house

me: yeah ion care, just let me know when you're here

isaac: bet

~

That was random, I guess Isaac's coming over now. He's been over before, but not like this. What if something happens? I'm probably just over thinking this. Am I shaved? Yeah, I'll be fine.

~

isaac: i'm here😜

isaac: weird emoji sorry

~

"Thanks for letting me come over, I needed to get out of the house" Isaac said, sitting down on my couch.

"Honestly, if I with all of those people I would have to leave all the time. So glad I live alone".

"Yeah well, I love them. It would be weird being away from them after this long of dealing with their shit." Isaac said, "So, what are we going to do"? I didn't think about that. I kinda just panicked for 10 minutes while he was driving here.

"I don't know, we could watch a movie or something?" I ask while tossing him the remote, "Move over, this isn't your apartment. I wanna sit". I sat down not too far away, but Isaac scutched closer and wrapped his free arm around me. His other hand had the remote in it, just scrolling through shit on Hulu.

"YO YOU'VE BEEN WATCHING CHAINSAW MAN"

"GOD ISAAC I HAVE NEIGHBORS"

"Oh shit sorry, I love Chainsaw Man. Have you seen me wearing that mask. I look so good in it man, look here I'll show you-". I had to cut him off.

"Isaac, I've seen the photo like 20 times. As much as I love how you look in it, I'm not looking at it again."

"Shut up and look at it" He holds my chin, forcing me to look at the picture on his phone. Damn. He is hot. I'm speechless. The fact his hand can easily grab my face like this, I wonder what else they can do. Looking up at him, my cheeks start to get hot a little bit. This eye contact is painful. I need this to go to more. My hand goes to the back of his neck, our faces slowly inching towards eachother. There's a pause, almost like we realized what is happening.

I close the distance. Just a light kiss, short and simple, but we both need more. Immediately, Isaac's hand pulls me in.

"God.. I-I need... you" I moan in between kisses. Isaac pulls back, and I whine at the loss of contact.

"What?"

"I can't tell if I'm just tired, but I need you so badly. Please Isaac." I am begging. BEGGING. For this man.

"You're so pathetic." He says right before kissing me again, this time more passionately, and his hand moving towards my neck. He squeezes softly, making sure it wasn't too much for me. I'm a moaning mess.

"Do you want to move to your bed?" Isaac questions before picking me up bridal style and carrying me towards my bedroom. My arms are wrapped around his neck while I'm looking up at him. I'm just looking at his eyes, he's so beautiful. He sets me down by the foot of me bed, so I'm standing with my arms around his neck. I always knew he was taller than me, but the height different is crazy. He looks twice my height, and he's still bending over to kiss me.

"Baby, go lay down. I'll take care of you". I almost moaned when I heard that. The things I would let this man do to me is insane, ever since I've met him the list has been getting longer and longer.

I'm laying down my bed, when suddenly my feet are pulled and my legs are dangling off the side. Isaac takes his sweet time pulling down my Nike shorts, teasing me slightly over my panties. I need him to hurry up and get straight to the point cus this is unbearable. Again, he slowly takes off my panties and just barely touches my pussy. The tiniest bit of contact makes me shiver and whine for more.

And like that, Isaac's eyes look up at me as he starts eating me out. He keeps looking and studying my every reaction until he gets the one he wants out of me. Remember when I asked what his hands could do? Well, I found out. As his tongue is focused on my clit, he slowly puts two fingers into my hole. I have to cover my mouth with my hand so I don't scream.

With his fingers thrusting in and out of me and his tongue working wonders on my clit, I know I won't last long like this. My eyes are stuck shut, with one hand over my mouth and the other holding his hair back. My thighs are practically crushing Isaac's head at this point.

"Isaac, I cant" I'm panting in between moans, "I'm so close". As I finish my sentence, everything stops. I whine and whimper, needing more stimulation.

Isaac moves from below my torso to standing at the foot of my bed. He slips his shirt over his head, leans down and puts me back into the spot I was before. Then continues to undress himself right before me. His body is gorgeous. I cant stop staring at him as he gets on top of me, kissing me softly. I can taste myself on his lips.

He breaks the kiss and slides my shirt over my head, exposing my chest. The cold air hit me all of a sudden, making me shiver for a little bit. It feels weird to be fully exposed to Isaac. The closest we've ever gotten to this is almost kissing on New Year's, but we both realized we've just had a little too much to drink and we backed off. I guess Isaac notices me thinking, cus he stops everything and looks down at me.

"Babe, you okay? You can tell me to stop at anytime, I want you to be comfortable" he says, it was the most serious he's sounded all night (well I guess morning). "We can stop if you'd like, I'm sorry I rushed all of this-"

"No keep going, I just got lost in my thought. Thank you for caring for me, Isaac." I pause my sentence to kiss his lips softly, "I'm having a good time". Isaac nodded and continued kissing my neck, leaving little marks every now and again. His hand creeped up, massaging my left breast, and his mouth making his way towards my right. When his tongue made contact with my nipple, I let out a slight moan and let my eyes close softly. My brain feels fuzzy, probably from the lack of sleep, but I love it. It feels like I'm high, but in the cringy "high on life" way.

"I have a condom in my nightstand" I blurt out, "but I'm on the pill so if you don't have anything you can go without it". His head perks up from my chest, looking almost as excited as a kid in a candy store.

"Really?" he asks excitedly. Yup, exactly like a kid. I nod my head yes and Isaac immediately moves to get himself into position. He lines himself up, looking up at me in my eyes, and slowly inserts himself into me. Both of our mouths fly open, releasing a string of moans and whines. Isaac was bigger than I expected, but he feels so good inside of me.

After a couple of second of staying still so I can get used to his size, Isaac starts to move. My hands move to hold on to Isaac's shoulders as he slowly moves in and out of me. I push his head down to kiss me to try and muffle my moans, but it barely does anything.

"Faster, please, please go faster" I beg, with our faces so close we're practically sharing breathes. His pace speeds up and my head relaxes back into the pillow. I can feel myself getting closer and closer by the second.

The room is filled with random moans or praises from either one of us, not being able to hear anything else. If Isaac didn't wake my neighbors earlier, then they're definitely awake now. Honestly, I could care less if I get a noise complaint.

"Isaac- Oh my- I'm- I'm getting close" I moan out between breathes. His hand moves from behind me to my neck, lightly choking me. My mouth flies open from the new pressure on my neck. Isaac, seeing the opportunity, takes over my mouth. Inserting his tongue and immediately dominates my mouth. I'm being so loud right now, and I don't care.

"Isaac, I'm about to- I'm 'bout to cum. Please Isaac. Oh my god please." I gasp out with the air I have.

"Do it. Cum for me, baby. You're so amazing" Isaac moans into my ear, loosening his grip on my neck a little. My nails digging so far into his back, they could leave scars. My head flies back, eyes rolling to the back of my head, and toes curl. A wave of pleasure rolls over my body as I cum with Isaac still going inside of me.

"Just a little bit more, baby, hold on for me. Please baby, you're doing so good for me." Isaac lets out as his hand lets go to steady himself on the bed, getting the pace back to how he needs it. While overstimulated, I try my best to hold tight for Isaac.

He's close. I can tell. Not too much longer, Isaac comes inside of me. All of his body weight crushed on top of me, feeling like a weighted blanket. A wave of praises came out of Isaac as he caught his breathe.

"Let's get you cleaned up"

-

After we took a very, very long and slow shower together, we laid down in bed together just cuddling.

"The house is asking where I'm at, Imma tell them I'm staying here for the night if thats okay with you" Isaac asks.

"Yeah, it's perfectly fine." I reply, "Random question, well two actually."

"Hit me."

"Okay so one: did you mean for this to end up like this? And was this technically a booty call or whatever?"

"Okay, first off I'm not liked that. But I realize it looks like it. Nah, I just wanted to hang out with you. It was just one of those late night and I'm bored situations"

"Okay, great, umm and two: what does this make us now?"

"Wow, umm.. hard question. I don't know. What do you want to be?"

"Maybe more than friends, I really like you Isaac." I confess, just staring into his eyes through the dark. He leans in and kisses me.

"Will you be with me?"

a/n: i hope you liked this:P my requests are currently open so make sure to leave some if you have any!!

[6sixx6sexual6]

Can u do nikki x fem reader angst please im dying for some angst rn PLEASE

SORRY IVE BEEN SLACKING ON REQUESTS AND THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING ANGST REALLY AND I WAS ALSO HIGH SO IT PROBABLY SUCKS.

word count: 1,301

warnings: drugs, alcohol, thats kinda it, mentions of sex once.

Nikki was starting to realize he was an addict. He didn't wanna spend 5,000 dollars a day on drugs. He didn't wanna shoot up every 30 minutes and nod off. he even missed his grandmas funeral because he chose to get high. A while back he and his girlfriend of well over a couple of years (not counting the numerous breakups) argued, she doesn't come around to their house as much, and Nikki hadn't talked to Vince, Tommy, or Mick in weeks and Nikki felt like he had nobody. he had another “girlfriend” who was just his drug buddy and used the excuse of being together just to shoot up. they didn't even have sex at all.

Nikki and the chick were on the couch. Nikki was either passed out or bearly awake. there were needles and spoons around them, Nikki still had the blue band around his arm as he was laid out on the couch.

you stumbled in the house for the first time in maybe 2 weeks. the house was still a mess from all the parties thrown but that was weeks ago. you went to find him and saw him in the living room with that girl and they both looked awful, you almost didn't know it was Nikki. you leaned against the archway with a bottle of liquor in your hand. "I'm going to Vegas." you told him. why? because you felt like going

Nikki could vaguely hear a familiar voice through the fog in his brain. He attempted to sit up against the arm of the couch, his eyes slowly opening as much as they could.

“What..?” he mumbled, his eyes glancing over at you as he slowly registered your presence. he couldn’t remember the last time he saw you.

"I'm going to Vegas." you repeated. Nikki looked awful. if you had seen him like this a couple of years ago you would've taken care of him making sure he was good as new. but you've done that for years and Nikki took it for granted. you got tired of taking care of him so you stopped when he needed it most.

Nikki watched you, his eyes barely open. he tried to gather his thoughts to say something to you, but his brain wasn’t working fast enough. a couple of years ago, if you had said the same thing he would’ve jumped up and asked why, worried that something was wrong. this time he just stayed where he was on the couch, watching you and slurring his words. “For how long..?” he mumbled, running a hand through his hair.

"I dunno." you answered. "til I feel like coming back." you said and took a swing from your bottle. not your first bottle of the night.

He tried to process what you said, but his mind felt muddled. He couldn’t remember the last time you had been around months ago. The last time he had seen you, you guys had ended up in a big fight.

“Don’t..you…” he trailed off, not even knowing what he was about to say. he ran a hand along his face again, trying to brush away the fog. “You’re ditching me…” he muttered.

"I'll be back." you mumbled and closed your eyes as you messed with your hair "You'll be fine.. m' not your mommy." you mumbled again little just from being drunk.

That made him scoff quietly, and he opened his eyes a little wider at that. He would’ve argued with you if his mind was clear. he would’ve said things like “I never said you were.” or “I don’t need you to be.” he would’ve said those things and fought with you like usual. But not right now. he was too out of it. “What if I want you to be..?” he mumbled into his hand.

you opened your eyes and looked at him for a few seconds. "then you're a few months too late." you said quietly. not softly, but quieter. it wasn't like him to ask something like that and it wasn't like you to answer like that, but we're changing and drifting apart. the whole band was. Tommy was married to Heather, no one spoke to Vince in prison, so he didn't speak to them, and no one ever knew where Mick was.

He frowned at your words and slowly sat up all the way, his eyes looking over at you. He hated hearing that from you, but he couldn’t bring himself to argue right now. not when he really wanted to. “A couple months too late..” he thought to himself. Had things really gotten this bad?

he looked down at his arms, the needle marks and old track marks were on full display. he then glanced back up at you. “I miss you..” he muttered.

you hum and looked at the ground while you were against the archway. you missed him too. a lot. but you've tried and tried for years taking care of him, loving him through everything, and he didn't do anything. you got sick of the one-way treatment. "yeah." you answered quietly.

He sighed and shut his eyes again, feeling a wave of guilt wash over him like it did every time he thought of you. he knew he hadn’t treated you like you deserved. not always. how many times had he gotten so high and said hurtful things that he didn’t mean? how many times had he gotten drunk and ignored you in favor of a party? He couldn’t even count on two hands the amount of times he caused you to cry. “I’m sorry..” he mumbled.

you felt a pang of guilt in your chest but you didn't say anything. you looked down at the bottle of liquor in your hand. what were you supposed to say? he knows you've forgiven him each time so what's this time gonna mean? "I have to pack." you told him.

Nikki stared at you, feeling a sense of hopelessness wash over him. he couldn’t blame you for leaving and had a feeling that you weren’t gonna come back. he had pushed you away so many times that he couldn’t expect you to come back.

he was silent for a few moments, not knowing what to say. a part of him wanted to ask you not to go, to beg you to stay and not leave him. but he didn’t say anything. he wasn’t in the right state of mind to.

when he didn't say anything you started walking to the stairs, your heeled boots clicked against the tile but were muted to a thud when you walked on the carpet stairs as his eyes followed you. He watched you disappear and head upstairs to your shared room, feeling an empty sort of pain in his chest. he stared down at his hands before he looked over at the girl sitting next to him. She just sat there in a daze, completely lost in a high. He wanted to get up and go up and stop you, to beg you to stay. his mouth opened like he was going to speak, but he didn’t say anything.

you went to your room that he was sharing with his drug buddy, the room was littered with needles and all kinds of things. it was a mess. you went into the closet, got a suitcase and threw whatever you had left in the closet in the suitcase and what his girlfriend hadn't taken. you took the suitcase downstairs.

you walked with the suitcase trailing behind you. and you looked back at the living room to tell Nikki goodbye, but when you looked at him he was already passed out with a needle in his arm. you looked at him for a couple more seconds before walking to the front door and leaving.

[sorryimananti-romantic]

Hey bestie sooooo lots of stuff happened and there was an opportunity I was really hoping I was gonna get, and I didn’t. On top of that it went to the same favorite people that get everything every time and I’ve just been feeling really upset and everything so if you’ve got any mingi comfort that would be great. I could just really use a lil virtual hug rn 😅. There’s a bunch of other stuff that led up to this but now im just feeling really hopeless and wanting to give up on my major even though it’s my dream. I think I kinda need to just sit and wallow for a bit and I’ll be fine but if you got any fluff I could use all of it 😅🩷

aw babes i'm sorry to hear that 😭🫂 you and me both honestly really need a virtual hug (nah a real hug actually) and well, i hope you get much better things than what you were aiming for! we never know where the flow of life is gonna take us so hoping for the best for you, always 🩷 and i hope you fight for your dream too! if you want to talk about it, i'm here for you 🩷

a mingi comfort fluff though, who am i to deny you? ;)

there are times in your life when all you want to do is lay down on a bed and sink through it into the void

or lay down on soft grass and hope the ground swallows you

you put a weight over yourself in the form of your blanket- the only physical thing weighing you down among a bunch of other invisible things

but that isn't enough

the warmth of it, the softness of it, it isn't enough

everything is silent. you can hear the static background noise- that's how quiet it is

could this go on forever while you gather your pieces together?

could time stand still for you?

no.

it never will

you're being swallowed by a bunch of thoughts

i'm alone in this world

no one will understand me

everything is over

there's no going back from here

and a bunch of other negative phrases that are murky in your head, but there in all their mighty presence

it feels like everything you've worked for is crumbling down in front of your eyes

everything is going wrong, wrong- where did it all start to go wrong?

you can't quite put a finger to it

all you know is that you are overwhelmingly sad.

the emotion 'sad' didn't make much sense to you- you always thought it was associated with some other emotion or feeling- such as when you lose someone dear and it's associated with grief

but now... you think you're starting to understand a little what's it like to be just sad. the plain old sad

it springs a little sarcastic laugh out of you and you have to purse your lips to keep another awful sound from bubbling out of you

but this time, your ears detect the familiar sound of footsteps in the house and you wonder just how deep in your thoughts you were to miss the sound of the door unlocking

you don't move. you don't make an effort to. you just hope that he goes to take a shower first or starts cooking. you hope he doesn't realise you're home already

you hope you get a little time to yourself so he doesn't have to see you in this state-

but a knock sounds on the door anyway and his voice calls your name, his eyes probably searching the darkness

you hope that he misses your curled figure in the blankets, but he's far too observant for that

he doesn't turn on the lights. you feel the edge of your bed dip as he sits there

"you're not hiding from me... are you?"

it's mingi. you could cry just hearing his voice

"no... just tired. i'll be out in a few minutes."

he doesn't miss the crack in your voice either

"do you want me to give you some space, or do you want me to stay?"

there's one thing you love about mingi. he always asks you what you need

and he always gives you what you ask for

if it's space you need, he will gladly give you it because he realises the importance of personal space and just sorting your own mess yourself

he won't question you until you talk yourself but he will keep reminding you that he's here

he's perfect in that way

but if it's him you need... he'll drop everything to be with you too

he'll either just hold you in silence or mutter affirmations

and for the first time in a while, you don't know what you need

so you tell him exactly that

mingi sighs deeply and gets up. you wonder if he's going to leave so you check through the little gap in the blanket, your heart beating anxiously

but he only draws the curtains apart just a fraction so he can see better

and then he's back, crawling in the bed next to you and asking if he can get in the blanket with you

you allow it. you scoot a bit to give him some space and he positions the blankets so he can hold you in his arms as he lies down next to you

you're slower this time as you make way to him and he notices that too. so he simply just holds you for a while

and you let the tears flow and wet his sweatshirt. you will apologise later, but for now, you can't stop it

his hand caresses your back repeatedly in soft, circular motions. his other hand is holding yours and squeezing it affectionately

you don't know how long you stay like this but at some point, the tears stop flowing and you move a little to wipe your face

"sorry for being a mess," you laugh and he lets out a short chuckle himself

"you know it's perfectly fine with me," he assures you, planting a kiss on the top of your head. "feeling better?"

"a bit, yeah," you tell him. you take a few deep breaths

"what's wrong, love?"

"everything," you sigh. "everything's going wrong at the same time and it's too much, mingi."

mingi brings you back in a hug, this time stronger and a reminder that you're not alone

and you realise that yes- you may have been a little selfish when thinking that you were truly alone in this world

you have him

your constant source of strength, a pillar to lean on

someone who always nudges you in the right direction when you're lost

someone whose words of wisdom heal you

and someone who makes you laugh, especially when he's being goofy like now

"shall we take that little trip now? drop everything and run away?"

"oh, how i wish i could, but i can't run away from this," you sigh.

and just like that, you start talking. slowly, but gradually, you tell him the sequence of events

and he gives you the validation you need- that everything you're feeling right now... it's okay to feel that

he makes you sit in front of him and he holds your hands as you work everything out

he gives objective answers- he knows your strengths and weaknesses, and he suggests the best course

he also plans every possible direction things could go from here on out- something he's really good at

"and like i always say... it can only get better from here, right?"

"sure feels like an all time low, so... yeah?" you say.

"every time i think i'm at an all time low, life throws another one at me"

you laugh at that- he's relatable like this

"well... it can't get worse than this, maybe, yeah?"

"and even if something bad happens," mingi addresses the anxiety in your heart. "even if things don't go as planned and you have to give up something important, you should remember that you're a strong person who can get through this."

you nod, letting his words sink in

"i'm here for you, yes," he says, "but i'm only a guide and emotional support, yeah? whatever you do, it's all you. and you're incredible and amazing. you will get through this. i'm proud of every decision you will make moving forwards. i believe in you, love."

it's all you need to hear and a few tears spill again, but you smile through them as you look at mingi, the dark strands falling over his forehead, his eyes warm

mingi, the person who makes you stand on your own two feet time and time again

mingi, who makes you realise that you can face anything in this world on your own

and mingi, who'll be there when you return from your battles. who'll patch you up, kiss your head and hug you

just like he hugs you now, all warmth and love

he brings you outside so you can eat dinner and it gets better

you don't feel like you're drowning anymore

you're not out of that surface, no, but it's a whole lot better for sure

he talks to you and you address other things in between jokes and kisses exchanged

and when it's time for bed, he holds you, preparing you for tomorrow

it will be okay

you will be okay.

[imaginespazzi]

Ok bestie, anon who followed up on Amoore reporting back as requested ha. I should say we are on a similar page, her & Kitley are very tough to get a read on. And a lot of the online chatter agrees its hard to judge and goes back and forth on whether theres something more going on. For those interested, I suggest watching their youtube ch series for a general sense of them interacting. Entertaining and light vids, not overly long. Really just little things between them here & there that add up. And of course a person can review their socials..

Now onto the tea I came across online. Imperfectly summarized the best I can below. (Allow me to stipulate that I have no way of verifying any of this, so please understand Im not at all sharing any of this to be presented as true or false. Take it as simply passing along the posting of others for conversations sake here in a safe space. Comments/feedback/corrections welcome)

:

Its described as on/off thing, first beginning summer 2020. A VT insider says people are aware that Amoore hasnt been committed, to put it delicately/nicely. Leading most recently to a break of sorts last Dec-mid Jan. (Added pretty sure they are together rn though. And another person did point out if Liz was getting cheated on why would Georgia seem to maintain a good relationship with the Kitley family, which is a fair Q to pose). But notably, a strangely long break in their podcast took place over that period and for the first time in 3 years they didn’t spend XMas together or hang around each other over the holiday and when podcast recording returned they just said “we had Xmas” and didn’t talk about it. It was also pointed out that sometime in winter, Liz had tickets to see an NHL game and went w Cayla King despite her and Georgia talking about how they wanted to go together before. Only sus bc it happened to coincide w the time where Georgia was speculated to have gotten close to Kate Martin. Then suddenly they K & G werent interacting anymore and L & G seem back to being “besties”.

Sidenotes:

Liz’s "2020 love playlist"… apparently someone has screenshots that it used to be titled Georgia. Includes some fav bands/songs of Amoores. And a tune called Australia Street lol. Lots of love songs predictably, but some breakup songs were added to it at one point (the comment seems to insinuate during the time they were going through issues)

They're friends with a married lesbian couple (Youtubers/influencers? The Bellaires) who they once visited alone.

Also, fyi, Kate Martin is apparently recently back w her last ex, whoever that is - per talk re social media activity

You're my new favorite person omg because this is my kinda tea fr! Can y'all tell I love some good gossip?

I'm ngl, I was never the most invested in V-Tech or the girls on the team, so I don't really follow them. And I was pretty convinced Liz was straight so I just assumed her and Georgia really were just really close besties.

But this checks out with what I've heard/read too, that they were in that "undefined" kinda place, mainly because of Georgia and eventually Liz got tired of it. I definitely didn't know about the Christmas or the NHL stuff but that makes sense. Also from what I heard, they were probably done for good now with Liz going to the draft? But still being together also makes sense. I'm so invested in this now omg.

[koolades-world]

DAMN SO IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO HAD A DU TO OBEY ME PIPELINE. that fandom made me worse and i think it made my life go downhill (/hj). i was so mean like we weren't all children with unrestricted internet access idk why i thought it was that serious </3 (sorry i was reading ur blog and saw a post responding to someone and i went "wait i minute" and had a few flashbacks)

OMG HEYYYY (more ex fandom ranting under the cut!)

first, welcome!! so glad you found a better fandom to migrate to and that you aren't stuck in the past like some people i knew. you are all good, no need to apologize. it's so crazy to me that i've encountered not one, but two ex du fans out in the wild! i thought there were about fifteen of us total lol. i know that war flashback feeling. was digging through old screenshots for something the other day and i found my stash and had to take a moment. sorry if some of this makes no sense or has odd flow. i'm word vomiting and i'm pretty tired rn (in the middle of drinking a matcha, coffee, and monster all at the same time). college has been sucking the life out of me, but i just had to answer this immediately

yeah it was absolutely wild man. i don't think anyone except like a few people liked me because to this day i'm still only friends with two of them. the way i was absolutely witched hunted i tell you :sob: i 100% made more enemies than friends. even my readers were mean, and i just took it all for some reason? i've been on tumblr for about a year and half now, and i haven't had a single mean fan, but back in the day, i think i had more than i can count. yes i was on wattpad for longer, but considering the ratio, that's crazy. i have about 2.2k followers here (love all of you guys mwa mwa) and i have zero mean fans. on wattpad i think i have like 260 something, and the fact that i cant count the amount of mean fans i had is insane. if i didn't have those friends, i would be convinced it was a fever dream. if you were on wattpad at the time, you'd understand how jarring the swap from that fandom to this one would be. fanfics are allowed? still kinda crazy to me actually. can't believe being an author is welcome here! im part of a zine now!!! i didn't think that was every going to happen. have no clue how the hell this pipeline happened, but hey! at least there's two examples lol. like i said before, i honestly cannot tell if it made me better or worse, but i can for sure think of all the ways it made me worse! haha.

yeah we were all kids with unrestricted internet access everyone was like 10 to 14. i was 13 or 14 when i entered the fandom and that was old LOL. can't believe i was the responsible adult in the room at 14! my now best friend was like 11 or so at the time. maybe its the trauma bonding or something, but we're basically siblings now. we are inseparable, package deal if you will. if you remember chev, i am exactly one day older than him lol <3 my favorite running joke but it also shows my age. the swap to this fandom was so odd, because now i'm a baby compared to everyone else lol. i can't believe i'm no longer a mediator or anything. this fandom is pretty unproblematic and it's so so refreshing to just be able to exist

if you knew who i was back in the day and didn't hate me, feel free to reach out! if you didn't still feel free to reach out haha. even if you didn't know me, you probably knew my best friend whether you liked it or not haha. i understand if you don't want to, but if you ever want to chat, i totally wouldn't mind! feel free to send me a dm and i can give you my discord. would be nice to get another outside perspective. if not, again, totally fine! have a wonderful day and hope you're recovering well. you're a fighter and deserve the best! hugs and kisses :)

[quodekash]

ployphach phatchatorn thanawat. she's not in dangerous romance, but man is she pretty and gorgeous and perfect. let's all just think about her for a second.

okay now that that's out of the way, continuing episode 7 of dangerous romance

:( my boy

you silly little man kang, you need to know your limits

I know you wanted to be cool and to prove yourself by eating the spicy food (and also sailom definitely thought the raspy coughing sounds you were making from the spice were kinda sexy-sounding) but sometimes your own health and safety should be prioritised above impressing people

YES YES YES YES YES YES YESSSS

ITS GUYNAWA TIME BABEYYYYYY

AND HE IMMEDIATELY LOOKS RIGHT AT GUY BECAUSE OF COURSE THEYRE SITTING NEXT TO EACH OTHER (well, across the corner but its still technically next to him in my book)

my boy looks uncomfy

I can't tell if its bc of the bar setting or if its bc he's right next to his enemy/crush and his enemy/crush is staring directly at him in a way that says "I want to destroy you" but in a few different ways

HOLY FRICK JUST FRIKIN GRAB HIM AND TAKE HIM TO A RESTROOM AND SMOOCHY SMOOCH GRAB HIS FACE AND MAKE OUT

LMAO HE CALLED HIM NONG

I still dont know if they're going down the maxauto route or not, if its platonic or romantic, but either way their dynamic is incredible and I love it so much

👀

nO

LETS NOT

THAT IS A GROWN-ASS WOMAN

HE IS 17/18

AND HE IS ALSO QUEER AS HELL

SHE'S SO PRETTY BUT AAAAAAA NO

KANG

everybody say thank you kang

"thaaaank youuu kaaaaannngg"

GOUERBIGE4OUWBGSD

WAIT

OMG

OMG

OMG

GVIO3REHJDGPIOHVEJRPIOHJGPIOBEIRJHIOFGIOB9JERHIPO DJHOPFIGO[VBER[VFD[J

I think they're both aware of their feelings for each other but they're afraid of it/rejection and thus express those feelings through anger and I just can't wait for them to hate fuc

PFFT

WHAT IS IT WITH THIS EPISODE AND TELLING VERY-NOT-STRAIGHT CHARACTERS TO GO/BE STRAIGHT

AND "be straight with me" HONEY, HE CAN'T BE STRAIGHT AT ALL, AND HE CAN BE STRAIGHT THE LEAST WHEN HE'S WITH YOU

KISS

THEYRE CHALLENGING EACH OTHER

THEYRE SO FLIRTING

THEYRE SO IN LOVE

HOLY FRICK NUGGETS IM GOING INSANE

they cheersed

THEY CHEERSED THEIR CUPS

THEY DID THE CLINKY CLINK

I can't tell what he's thinking

it could be anywhere from "im so tired" to "he's so hot" to "man I wish I was that bottle rn" to just completely unimpressed

we all knew it would end like this

there was no other way it could've gone

(dear lord jesus please let them kiss in a moment)

HOLY FRICK

HOLY FRICK

I have such a severe case of side couple syndrome idk if you've noticed

im making strange noises

they're so important to me

ghibeisgdkhverbshdgbrehb

I feel like its important for everyone to know that im currently lying on my stomach looking at my laptop with my feet in the air kicking, but im also balancing my pillow on top of my feet because I do that sometimes, and im doing incredibly well at kicking my feet while not letting the pillow fall

GIVUERJDKBG

IM SMILING SO HARD

I LOVE THEM

oh he's recoiling

he has trauma we havent even begun to unpack yet

thinking back to the dog quote, where he implies his dad used harsh methods to "train" him, and he probably hit him a lot. the way he's yelling now, and the way kang is shrinking away in fear, keeping his voice low, avoiding eye contact, tells me this is bringing back a lot of repressed memories of pain and fear

that was... weirdly kind

I think he realised he had an audience, and he has a reputation of goodness to maintain for his election, and he needs to make sure he's still got a good eye from the public, and the public happens to contain kang's friends

but behind closed doors, the monster of pure anger that kang sees him as emerges from the shadows, leaking from all the dark corners of their mansion, and kang shuts himself off to not have to experience the horrors looming above him in the shape of his father

THEY ARE FRIENDS

CAPTAIN GRANDMA, LETS GOOOO

CAPITANO NONNA

YES okay so my thoughts were right

my thoughts were: the 'so we can go official now?' clip is gonna happen this episode

its gonna be kang's bravery in standing up for auto that makes sailom agree to let them be official

but I wasn't sure how that would happen this episode because I wasn't sure if there would be a soccer match this episode

BUT HERE IS PROOF so basically im amazing and im gonna be right and we should all appreciate me

...bRO

is this connection how hes gonna end up at kang's house to steal and commit crimes and perhaps shoot kang's dad @respectthepetty

WHY DO THEY LOOK LIKE THAT

WHY DO THEY LOOK LIKE THAT

HOLY FRICK

THATS RIDICULOUS

HOW ARE THEY GONNA MOVE IN THOSE CLOTHES, THE GUYS ARE IN FULL ASS SUITS

MAN I DONT LIKE THIS

THAT SUCKS

I THOUGHT MAYBE THE CHEERLEADING WAS ACTUALLY KIND OF GOOD IN THIS SHOW AND NOT TOXIC AND NOT EXPLOITATIVE OF WOMEN BUT APPARENTLY I WAS WRONG

anyway

oh

well- I feel slightly better about it now

okay they do look lovely and pimfah loves it and doesnt like feel uncomfortable so thats good

I just. you would think they would wear something less fancy for a... soccer game

ME

felt that

my emotions are stored in my eyes bro, whatever it is, its coming out in tears

GROUP HUGSSS I love group hugs

ITS BEEN TWO HOURS AND I HAVE FIFTEEN MINUTES LEFT OF THE EPISODE, LETS SEE HOW LONG IT TAKES ME TO WATCH 15 MINUTES (find out in the next post because I once again talked too much)

[kafus]

i’m going to be honest i do not know if i have the passion for pokemon X to go into meticulous detail like usual and towards the end of my playthrough i was really starting to feel burned out on it so this post is gonna be kinda short and discussing my admittedly mixed feelings (shoutout to XY stans im so glad you love this game, this post is very subjective)

first, here’s all my hall of fame stuff and whatnot. i spent 51 hrs on the main campaign - the pic of my trainer card was taken directly after beating the game and the pics of my team were taken right before the league.

despite having mixed feelings abt this playthrough i did get really attached to my team, Sai, Knife, and Taser in particular :]

it’s worth noting that afaik i caught every single encounter available in the game before beating it, including tuesday exclusive rotom and thursday exclusive banette. and shortly before beating the game i ascended to Duchess rank in the battle chateau

i also farmed a metric fuckton of berries and did some other tasks so suffice to say i have interacted w this game’s features a lot

all that being said i have two main takeaways from beating X again for the first time in a decade and one is gameplay related and the other is story related

first, gameplay wise, i was surprised by how easy X is - i think “pokemon is too easy now” is a tired criticism that isn’t usually accurate or fair, but it’s really hard not to feel that way about this game in particular, coming from experience with playing both modern and old pokemon games extensively as an adult. this game definitely isn’t balanced around its own exp all and there are SOOOO many trainers to fight which means if you like fighting all the trainers when possible (which i do, and i dont have issues like this in other pokemon games) you overlevel extremely quickly. i’m unsure if XY was balanced without it first or something, but this is definitely an issue i haven’t seen to this extent since. i am aware i could have played with it off but since it’s the first pokemon game to have it and it’s given to you so early i wanted to see what the intended experience was with it on

on top of that, all gym leaders only have 3 pokemon! most boss battles in the game had so few pokemon, it honestly felt strange. i love gym battles and stuff in pokemon games, i love using unorthodox strategies and going in underleveled for fun, and i play every pokemon game on set mode w no items in battle by default casually so there’s almost always some sort of thinking i have to do, but w X i was so overleveled and the gym leaders had so few pokemon that for the most part it was just spamming A for a minute and then it was over. at the very least when i beat the league i had some fun with it and set up with my unevolved skiddo w bulk up to tear through diantha’s team

bc of how braindead battles were for me in this playthrough i mainly got enjoyment from pokedex completion which is something i always find fun and X is no exception - most of those 51 hrs are probably me looking for rare hordes and whatnot, i had a blast with the encounter variety in this game and trying to collect everything possible as i went. i also thought the berry fields and battle chateau were super cool and i interacted w those a lot daily. there’s a lot i could say about the smaller features too, super training, amie, the PSS (best online service for pokemon ever btw), o powers, restaurants in lumiose, etc, but i don’t have the energy to get into it rn. suffice to say when X’s side features they shine, they do really shine, even though i found the main campaign underwhelming

as for story…

when i started this playthrough all i really remembered from playing this game when i was 13 was the post-e4 sequence with AZ (still made me tear up as a 24 year old lol) and the cool xerneas encounter cutscene, and they are definitely the highlights of this game because the story of XY is what i was most disappointed by, i was really hoping i’d find new appreciation for it despite what everyone says about the story being weak and i really did try so it’s a little frustrating the game just didn’t deliver

yeah the pacing is weird and the rivals might as well have the depth of cardboard cutouts (one note and completely unable to be characterized outside of their roles) but that’s not really my main issue w the game. i don’t think i picked up on this stuff as a 13 year old but as an adult playing i was really uncomfortable with pokemon trying to make a story about literal genocide and eugenics but handling it so carelessly. like some of the dialogue actively disturbed me and i don’t think the writing is good enough to convey the nuance of what it’s TRYING to say, especially to kids, which i think is necessary for topics like this

i assume that they were trying to say something about the obliviousness of adults and people in general because of Sycamore being so blindly trusting of Lysandre and also totally incapable of accomplishing anything himself (seriously how did anyone like this guy, it must solely be because he’s french and hot, dude dropped out of learning about mega evolution bc he just Gave Up, and then he shoved that on some kids as if it was new research but it wasn’t, and then when lysandre tries to commit genocide his apology is so halfassed and Nothing, and also dialogue implies he’s not even doing professor shit he’s just goofing off while you save the world and do his research for him, it’s not charming it’s Annoying and irresponsible) but god damn i dont think it came off how they intended. all of the adults in this game are blind to what’s going on (even having their holocasters spied on) and give sympathy to Eugenics Man but even after the world is saved, new NPCs after the fact still express sympathy to Lysandre and the main characters like Sycamore don’t properly make up for their behavior. the game’s writing just sort of excuses everyone being a dipshit about literal eugenics and doesn’t properly apologize to the children who took a stand (the apologies given were basically nothing) in a way that i think is genuinely irresponsible considering the subject matter. it’s one thing for a pokemon game to have lackluster writing and another for it to have shitty writing when something so analogous to real life like this is involved. plus the plot moves on from the events of team flare so quickly it just feels Silly tbh and its not helping the writing’s case

idk i think XY had some interesting lore and history (btw that museum in lumiose city is super cool) and the potential with AZ was crazy and that post-e4 sequence still hits like a train, but the poor handling of the eugenics topic and the shitty pacing really took me out of it. i’m glad that after this pokemon scaled back the sheer gravity of its subject matter just a bit because oof

if i wrote this directly after beating the game my thoughts would probably be more organized so sorry if this isn’t making my points effectively but yeah idk. i’m still on and off working on my friend safari and i plan to do more in X eventually but for now i am good

[skitskatdacat63]

Hiii CATIE!!!!! HIII

Im pretty pretty sure people have already asked BUT HOW WAS ATTENDING THE US GP LIVE!!!! WAS???? TELL ME!! DO YOU HAVE PICS??? I know I know im late.

I ALSO HOPE YOU GOT HOME SAFE AND SOUND AND THAT YOU ARE RESTING NOW+!!!(I saw the chaos you went through im deeply sorry for you :( )

ANYWAYS HOW WAS THE RACE? HOW WAS EXPERIENCING STROLLONSO LIVE?????? AND omg did you get pics of drivers??? :00

You must must share pleaseeeeee.wax.poet

OH MY GOD ELLE SORRY THIS IS SO LATE!!! IT WAS VERY COOL!!!!! VERY SURREAL!!!!!! I've taken a week to answer this but uhhhh yes I am in fact home now 🥰 I got home at like 1 am which was cool....

First of all I have to mention this! I was fighting for my life walking thru the Austin airport(from sleep deprivation), and I had my Fernando hat on my backpack, right? Some girl comes up to me and asks if I'm going to the GP, I say yes. SHE GAVE ME A FRIENDSHIP BRACELET, I COULD'VE SOBBED 🥹 It says on it "wtf is a km", I'm still so happy

COTA was the first race I ever watched, so to be actually at that track and watch a race live there was extremely surreal! Very hot though my god 😵‍💫 I think last year it was pretty hot, right? And my brother kept sending me the temp and it was pretty okay, and then of fucking course the temp leaps up to 89-97°(31-36° Celsius btw) right in time for the gp....so that was nice(I say as I burn in the sun like a vampire. But don't worry I didn't even really tan at all 😭 I always wore a hat and a lot of sunscreen. And meanwhile my brother was literally a lobster)

(This is a long post):

So unfortunately I missed the drivers parade because my brother and I were dying on Saturday night and his friends wanted to go first thing in the morning, and we're like "we will go later actually 😊" and missed it entirely 😭😭😭 but his friends took pics of Mclaren and Aston for me!!!!! But unfortunately I havent gotten them still, so I'll have to reblog this later with those! I took a lot of pictures of the cars I took from behind the fence, which I think I've posted some of? Lmk if anyone wants those!! They're very random, I just thought it was very surreal to see the cars flying past, so I took a million.

The coolest part was definitely running on track after the race was over!!! Soooooo surreal, and so I'm only gonna post pics rn from Sunday(bcs pic limit on phone) and also I think everything else kinda pales in comparison(but of course lmk if there's anything you're interested in seeing 🤭)

Okay and did I see any drivers...? ONLY ONE BUT AAAAHHHH I DID SEE LANDO!!! Not even one of my favs but it was soooooo surreal to see him, even from afar. As you can see above, everyone standing on the fences was blocking the view 🙄, but during the podium, I was focusing my camera btwn their legs and got literally one second of Lando 😭 I think its a pretty aesthetic clip, so I gifed it!!

It was so funny, I went to the gp with my brother and friends, so all these older guys yeah. And I was showing this off to them on the ride home, and his one friend was praising me so much for it 😭😭 like: "oh my god!!!! You could put this in an edit !!! This is so sick!!!!"

Oh one other thing!!! I think I've mentioned it before but my god, my favorite f1 podiums are always the ones with confetti, right?? AND THERE WAS CONFETTI AT THIS RACE!!!

LOOK AT HOW PRETTYYYYY!!!! And so anyways, I picked up so much confetti off the ground and now it lives forever in my phone case 🥰🥰🥰 I have no other room for pics on this post(for now) but oh my godddddddddd most of the confetti were just rectangles BUT THERE WAS ALSO ONES SHAPED LIKE TEXAS!!! SO COOL!!!!! And I also picked up a bunch of tire marbles off the ground!!! And a piece of plastic that probably came off some car. It was so funny when all of us were just scrounging off the ground. My bro's one friend somehow found a piece of carbon fiber, and we're all like "how can I kill him in his sleep and steal this from him..." But no the highlight actually of that process was watching my brother sprint to the podium, but stopping and grabbing a bunch of gravel first to shove in his pocket 😭😭😭

The other two days were fun as well, but also a lot of just dying in the heat and drinking a fuckton of red bull, so there's not too much specifically to say! I really liked hearing the cars. I think if you wanna know what's actually going on in a race, watching from home is better, but hearing the cars go by and seeing them is just so fucking sick. It was so funny to see grown men be like "I think I'm going to cry hearing these cars." I was really flexing on them with "uhhh yeah I've already been to a gp already 🙄🙄"

Anyways I ended the day by breaking bank by buying my dad and myself Fernando shirts because he is of course Fernando's biggest fan 🥰🥰 and I bought the most delicious overpriced lemonade, which I only drank half of bcs my brother proceeded to accidentally elbow it out of my hand....

OH WAIT ONE MORE DETAIL LOL. On Friday, my brother and his friend were waiting in line for smth and I was talking to them outside of the barrier. I look down, hmm theres a red cap abandoned on the ground, I pick it up, it is in fact a Ferrari hat. And that is how my brother acquired a $40+ dollar hat for free. Lucky bastard....I was the who found it!

[zombisnax]

Hey everybody, I've started a writing project that may or may not be intended to be frerard angst (oh God RPF in 2024) shocker..

This is just a demo an I wanted to gather some opinions from people!

This is my first attempt at a fan fiction, mostly rn it's just world building for our main character (fictional Gerard in this case)

I walk hastily down the wet pavement as the rain pours down on my greasy black hair. I can feel my clothes growing increasingly wet. This is the worst. My head is pounding and I can barely see my surroundings due to my overgrown hair, I really need to cut it soon. I can’t believe I do this to myself. Now I’m piss drunk and I’m definitely gonna pay for it In the morning. I'm a depressed asshole with no control. As I walk up to my college apartment building, trying to focus on where my feet are being planted going up these steps. I reel my head back in agony, realizing it's gonna be a pain in the ass to climb up the seemingly endless flights of stairs. “I’m never getting fucked up at the bar again at this rate, not to mention I have school tomorrow. Great. . .” I mumble to myself as I trudge up the stairs to my dorm room.

I walk up to my room's front door and rummage through my sweater pocket, the sweater is nearly falling off my shoulder completely but I couldn’t care less at the moment. I fumble my keys as I attempt to unlock the front door. A dark figure nudges moving behind me, I glance over out of curiosity and see the backside of a guy who looks kinda short for his assumed age. I mean I hope he isn’t some kid or anything I think to myself, as the assumed “he” is knocking on my neighbors dorm room I realize I’ve been staring for too long so I open up my own door and head inside. I close and lock it behind me and I sigh heavily as all my tired bones catch up to me. I trudge further to the closest spot to lay down. I flop dramatically on my old leather couch that squeaks softly from my movements. My eyelids grow heavy as I soon fall asleep there.

the sunlight hits my eyes through my eyelids as I groan awake. The familiar feeling of my head being used as a bass drum makes my wake even more unforgiving. I move my sweaty body to an upright position and the strain in my back from sleeping in such an uncomfortable position feels like a slap in the face. I try to remember what time it was I came back home last night but effortlessly give up and decide to try and stand up anyway. The clock on the wall tells me I have to be at my first class in the next hour or so. The thought of having to pay attention to a lecture this morning haunts me.

Now walking to my cabinet and fix myself a glass of water, knowing I'll be asking for it later so I might as well get it over with now. being more awake I remember that I'm wearing last night's clothes and I probably reek of yesterday. forcing myself to walk down the hall to my bedroom and my eye catches my pack of cigarettes on the desk near the closet. I try to ignore it for now and open my eyes wider to better examine the clothes I should change into. Afterwards Im clean up my dirty clothes that I just stripped from my body and throw them in a designated pile on my floor. ‘should get that thrown in the washing machine soon. I change out the contents of my pockets from my pants and jacket to my current slouchy skinny jeans and torn denim jacket. In hand now my lighter I remember the taste of nicotine and reach for my pack on the desk. shoving both in my pocket deciding its best not to smoke in the building.

I turn towards my bathroom so I can freshen up. definitely don’t have enough time to shower so I do the basic things first for now. Brushing my teeth; albeit quicker than I probably should have, deciding that should be good enough for society to handle, running my hands through my hair and staring at my mirror reflection just to make sure I got everything right. Just as I thought about leaving for school I turned around back to my kitchen almost forgetting my antidepressants. shoveling them down my throat begrudgingly and grab my phone from the counter and my school bag. It hangs across my body and lands at my hip, the patches sewn onto it scratches on my pants and i'm walking towards my front door to exit the open hallways of the apartments. Just before I open my front door I realize it's the middle of October and usually cold as shit. Quickly i'm pulling out my cell phone from my back pocket to check the weather. “Shit. Perfect” its 40 degrees outside and i'm a sucker for any opportunity to wear a scarf, I pick one out from my hat tree that’s basically just full of a bunch of scarfs. Now finally ready to step outside.

The chill air hits my face, the sky can be seen from the right staircase exit. It’s a violent orange and yellow glow peaking in weaving from the dark October clouds. I start my commute to the nearest coffee shop. God knows I need some caffeine right now, my head is still practically  exploding.

[moonjxsung]

HI STAR I MISSED YOU SO MUCH ASKJFHAKJH GRHAHHHH

also important to note i dont know who the fuck put in an ask saying that im pregnant and pretended to be me...??? im not??? wtf did i open your blog to.. who in the freaky pretends to be an anon on a tumblr blog and say that theyre pregnant ..?? 😭😭😭😭

im so sorry i havnt texted you or sent you an ask or anything in forever... its been like 4 months holy shit i missed you so much and ive been wanting to reach out and send in some kind of message or whatnot but something just kept pulling me back and also ive been in this pit of misery recently

TW below (mention of abuse)

my mom used to abuse me both physically/verbally really badly when i was a child up until high school and when i finally left, but very long story short it resurfaced again recently when i saw her and i got fed up w her bs, law enforcement got involved, still figuring things out w the case rn and etc... but yeah!! (this happened maybe a month ago but its still ongoing)

honestly i think ive just been dealing with a rough transition through pretty much a lot in life including family, friends, overall workload etc etc so even if i wanted to reach out, i couldnt really do so because my mental state was just at the lowest of the low so even if i wanted to reach out to someone to talk i was too tired to ..

I AM VERY VERY GLAD TO BE BACK THOUGH!! im doing decently okay recently, still processing some bad news here and there and definitely very rocky every now and then but finally knowing that someone whos been torturing me since i was born is finally getting cut off from her bs is a lot more relieving than i thought it would be. definitely a lot less nerveracking than i thought asw

also kinda had a rough little patch with my close friends a few months back and we're all still kinda processing through it but i think ive definitely filtered out who they are and who exactly supports me when i support them back, and who only really socializes with me for their own benefit, etc.

but yes that has been the past few couple months while i disappeared!!! im v sorry i left out of nowhere and didnt even send in a stupid little message or anything <//3 how are you star?? i missed you so much :(( any life updates on your end??? now that im back youre probably going to see me for a couple while and i wont be dropping off the ends of the earth again hehe

love, your actually and most literally biggest fan, clover! (also feedback for no guts no glory coming soon so be prepared 💔)

~ 《 ☘️ 》

HI BABY I MISSED U SO BAD

IM CRYING YALL WHOOOOOO IS PRETENDING TO BE MY CLOVER ANON AND LIED TO ME THAT SHE’S PREGNANT LMFKFJDJSKDKFJGKGJ 😭😭😭😭 I came THIS close to messaging you on discord and wishing you a safe pregnancy PLSSSSSSKDKDKDJ

*TW heavy topics below*

:((( I am so so so sorry to hear the past few months have been so hard on you oh my god. I’m so sorry for not reaching out on discord and checking in on you sooner. I’d assumed you were just swamped with over school/work stuff, but I’m so sad to hear you’ve been going through all of this by yourself :( I’m glad at least the situation seems to be under control, and that it’s in the hands of the law now. I hope you’re in a safe living condition as of now (please reach out if you’re ever in need of anything at all) and I hope everything is okay in due time :( sending you so so so much love and I’m so sorry you had to deal with all of that.

I’m sorry to hear your friend situation is a bit spotty right now too :( my friends and I have been in a rough patch for a little while now and it absolutely sucks. But just like you mentioned, I do also feel like it’s truly allowed me to find out the real intentions some of my friends have and to reevaluate if I even want them in my life at this point. I hope you can either mend things with them, and if not, I have no doubt that you’ll be able to find much better people in the future. You deserve people who put you first and make you a priority, especially during this rough patch.

I’m doing okay <3 A lot has happened at work (honestly for the worse) and I’ve been so insanely stressed I feel like I’m dying. I cried all of last week because of some shit that happened at work and I think I’m losing hair bc of stress and it’s just jfkfkdjdkdkdjjttj I’m so tired 😭 but in GOOD news I do have a girlfriend for the first time on this account and she’s so lovely and supportive and we are so so so happy 💓 I feel like the fall months just tend to be full of so much stress and grieving and loss before things get good again in the winter. I just keep telling myself things will get better eventually :’)

ANYWAYS I MISSED YOU SO BAD I’m so glad to hear you’re not pregnant (not that it’s a bad thing but I was STRESSED for you) and please please please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need anything at all 💓💞🩷💕 I love you so so so much my little clover you have been SOOO MISSED ON HERE ☘️🫶

[pepsimaxolotl]

I’m half asleep rn but I’m just gonna post about this now. Usually, every December, I post a month by month art recap and I’ve done this for every year since 2018.

That won’t be happening this year.

I crashed and burned so hard in the middle of the year. I’m too tired to do anything and I’m going through the worst art block and everything I draw I’m unhappy with. This has been the case for awhile

I’ve elected to take a break from art and just slowly work back to making illustrations. This means I don’t have anything to show for 2023. And that’s ok. I mean it’s kinda funny cause last years resolution was “do more art for yourself” and then I kinda stopped all together but it is what it is

Maybe I’ll post it with whatever doodles I can scrap together for the month cause it’s not like I haven’t been drawing at all. But I cannot remember the last illustration I did that I wasn’t paid for. Probably my current pfp???? Maybe??

It’ll return one year. I would like to get a 2024 one out, but I cannot confirm. I imagine there’d probably be a 2025 one since I don’t want to break that long but idk. That’s a choice for 2025 me.

Hope y’all have a happy holidays and new year. Im gonna be here reblogging as per usual

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

well I've had an interesting first week of the year back at work. I managed to get through to my usual doctor this week, which is a bit of a miracle, considering she's always back late jan/early feb each year. she's recommended 3 places for me to ring to follow up on a probable ADHD diagnosis. the best one is one in Sydney, in Bondi.

but to do all of their tests would mean I'd try to jam them into a week, if I could (probs not let's be real), or each time I do one I spend on a hotel room to stay up there, since I just wouldn't feel bothered to the 2 hour drive home after 8 hours of tests. but the Sydney one gives you a brain scan which would be super cool. but also if you managed to get bulk billed, it's $1,200. also they don't focus on meds, they focus on "brain based" and behaviour change stuff.

the other 2 places are local to my area, but you have to ring to find out their prices. but on the other hand, my doc said to leave all this stiff until after I have my colonoscopy that's booked for a couple weeks from now, on the 16th.

work is better since I'm not at a tired low point like I was at the end of last year. my boss is a bit happier that I'm turning up at the office at around 8:50 roughly and set up by 9. but yeah I hate having to cut my pre work bed relax after my bath each morning to 7:15 to get out the door by 8;20. but rn 8:20 is only working bc it's the school holidays so I'm not locked into the mronjng school run traffic and school zones right next to my house (basically). so it means I will have to bother to leave at 8:15 or whatever when school starts back up again on jan 31st.

but yeah. I still haven't handed in any of my unfinished (or unstarted) cadestship assessments; bc I forgot right before we left of chrissy/NY break to ask our outsourced IT guys to set up our VPN access app (it just gives you a code to type in) on my phone to access the work hard drive at home lmao. so I've meant to start this week, but I just haven't.

aside from work, the other interesting thing is that someone from the catholic school I went to for years 7-10 from 2008 til 2011, decided to invite me to a 10 year reunion that someone else from our year group from that school set up on Tuesday on fb for October this year. and I was just so surprised that someone bothered to remember me and invite me.... and I feel kinda touched tbh lol. bc i didn't even graduate with them properly, in a way, in 2013, bc I obvs graduated at the public school that I transferred to. it's so random that someone thought to invite me all these years later.

and I'm also stressing over the event a little. mostly on the level of what to wear to it, obvs lmao. but also, most of these people are successful working in good jobs. or they run their own successful local businesses/take over their parentd businesses.

while, on the other hand. I finish my cadetship in march, and I have no idea whether i'll be kept on where I am or whether I'll be somewhere else or jobless lmao. but anyway. it's going to be so weird seeing anyone from that school again, when half of them have kids and are married now or some have even divorced or split from their partners that they married in our early 20s (or at least that's what I've deduced from their name changes on fb back to their original last name I knew them by in school).

also im bitterly jealous of a few of them because they've bought their first house or have a second house and are using their first as an investment property. like bruh. am I the only one who still hasn't moved out of home yet??? and obvs there are obvs other people renting but still. am i the only one still at home??? I don't want questions about that tbh.

like is it even worth catching up with these people, when I still remember the derision I got from one of the girls from my group from that school, when I ran into her at uni back in 2016??? how she told me that everyone was actually SO GLAD that I'd left bc apparently they were all secretly harbouring embarrassment for my behaviour and my "attention seeking" or whatever the fuck she said to me???? but also part of me hopes that rich boy goes and is happy to see me and I'll get to congratulate him in person on his engagement or perhaps being married by the time this event happens (if it even does lmao). and that's my other thing. could just be an elaborate joke where they do this, and I turn up, but NO ONE is there???? like hello trust issues, aren't you looking very sexy this week.

[revoltinglittleworm]

i really do feel at a loss rn financially lmfao i think i have about.. $50 and thats before any kind of bills need to be paid... *clown emoji* (sorry im on desktop)

ive been thinking i need to make new tshirts to sell but the ones ive made in recent time havent been selling as well as my old ones, and my sales have dropped sooo much. idk i honestly feel like i dont have any ideas.

i’d love to make money off of prints or artwork like paintings but idk. i always feel unsatisfied with my work, to the point where i either give up or think no one would even want it. ive had a listing of one of my paintings on etsy for awhile, and its in someones cart but it hasnt been purchased yet (i listed it for $300 lol). ig i just genuinely feel like a subpar artist... i feel amateur and mediocre at everything i do, the only thing i ever see potential in is my music and even with that i think is not great lmao. i forgive myself more for that though because music is new to me still and is hard and i think im decent for someone who is still a beginner.

i wish i could offer the same space to myself with my other endeavors, but its hard, especially when the main thing on my mind is money. it really doesnt help the patience and skill that art requires when you are horribly broke and feel like you need to create in order to afford basic necessities.

so ig im just seeking any kind of advice or words, i dunno. i have a fine job right now its just become very monotonous and i dont make much money from it. ive grown tired of it and would love to be supporting myself on my own, through art or creativity in some kind of way.

i begin to feel hopeless about everything when im broke. i question myself and my abilities. ive been practicing guitar again tho, and it feels nice. i want to be able to improve and be able to play even if just at an intermediate level, though of course id love to be amazing at it in the future. other than that i havent been working on ableton, and i havent finished a song in forever.... i hate all my old songs because i can sense a sort of holding back and reluctance in them that i despise and am desperately trying to move past. so most of my old songs are duds because i didnt approach them in the way i need to and im not sure if they are fixable tbh...

anyway idk what else to say im just kinda down today. i go back to work tomorrow so thats probably why. i just wanna live a good life and enjoy things and love what i create.