#this is like a next 3-6 months they will be up
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
can you see the stars in your dreams (and do they have a lot to say about me) - Part 20
Or: a secret Admirer AU
PART 1 || PART 2 || PART 3 || PART 4 || PART 5 || PART 6 || PART 7 || PART 8 || PART 9 || PART 10 || PART 11 || PART 1 || PART 13 || PART 14 || PART 15 || PART 16 || PART 17 || PART 18 || PART 19
Chrissy is willing to admit that when Steve doesn’t call her after his date, she panics. If her mom wasn’t such a light sleeper, she would’ve snuck out to check up on him. But instead, she wallows, dozing on the couch, not even able to call Jeff to bitch because what if Steve chooses that moment to call?
So, she can admit, when he finally calls a few minutes after seven in the morning, she’s a little short with him.
“Finally, Steven,” she hisses into the phone, keeping her voice quiet so as not to alert her mother to their conversation. “I thought you were dead in a ditch somewhere!”
“Sorry, sorry!” he rushes out, sounding contrite. “We sort of fell asleep.”
Chrissy gasps, a smile slowly spreading on her face as the implications set in. “You guys slept together?” she demands gleefully.
“We didn’t have sex!” he shouts, and she’s glad, for the first time, that his parents are so absent from his everyday life. “We just fell asleep!”
She’s still smiling, twirling the phone cord round and round her fingers. “Does that mean it went well?” she wheedles.
She doesn’t think that Eddie would suddenly realize he’s straight and renege on the date, not really, but Steve had, and she can’t get the terrified tone of his voice out of her head.
“Well—” he drawls, leaving her on tenterhooks for a few seconds more. “He took me to see some shitty horror movie.”
“Oh my god,” she whispers, full-on grinning now. “What a stereotypical move.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” he replies so wryly that she can almost see the way his eyes must be rolling. “Except he barely talked to me the whole time and didn’t even try to hold my hand.”
“No!”
“And then he took me into the woods like some sort of serial killer, and then tried to kiss me so abruptly that my lip split a little.”
“No!” she shrieks with laughter before catching herself and slapping a palm over her own mouth as Steve’s own amused chuckle filters through the phone line. “And you still spent the night?”
“He was nervous!” Steve defended. “And besides, the second kiss was much better.”
“Your boy’s a fast learner, huh?”
Steve hums, and she wishes he was here with her, so she could see the dopey grin that must be on his face as he says, “yeah,” with a dreamy sigh. “He took me stargazing.”
Chrissy coos, can’t help it, not when this whole thing’s been building for so long now. Not when there’s been an edge of fear to everything Steve’s said for months. He deserves something nice for once.
“And you’re going out again?”
“Oh, definitely,” he replies, and a knot of fear she’s had tucked beneath her sternum loosens.
He sounds excited, happy, hopeful. If Eddie does anything to jeopardize this, Chrissy will be digging a very deep hole and tossing him into it. She’s got a shovel, and the muscle strength built up from years of cheer—she’ll manage just fine.
So, when Eddie walks up to her in the cafeteria in some sort of fucked up parallel to that first time and bends at the waist in a showy bow, hand outstretched as he asks, “a word, madam?” she’s ready to kill him.
But, when she glances at Steve at her side, his ears are red, and he’s smiling up at Eddie from beneath his lashes. And when she looks back toward Eddie she catches the tail-end of a wink that has Steve sputtering.
Even Jason doesn’t protest from the other side of the table where he’s quietly seething.
So, she takes his hand and follows him out of the cafeteria.
Eddie doesn’t seem to know where he’s going, as he walks through the halls, peering into nooks and crannies until he finds a corner he deems suitably vacant enough. He flops down, legs outstretched in front of him, uncaring of the dirt caking the floor.
He pats the spot next to him, smiling up at her, so she slides down the wall and crouches beside him, unwilling to let her bare legs touch the floor.
Eddie leans away from the wall and wrestles his jacket off before placing it on the floor in front of Chrissy. Gratefully, she sits atop it, crossing her legs to keep them safe. She turns her body so she’s facing Eddie dead on, and he follows her lead.
When he doesn’t say anything, she breaks the silence with a quiet, “I hope you know that if you hurt my friend, I’ll kill you.”
“I have no doubt, Lady Cunningham,” Eddie replies, drawing an X across his heart with his finger. “But, I’m not here to talk about Steve.”
“Then—what?”
He’s grimacing now, no longer meeting her eyes as he fiddles with his rings, one of his fingers bizarrely missing its usual adornment. “We’re friends, right?” he asks hesitantly, like he’s choosing each word with deliberate care.
“Of course,” she replies, eyes trained on the little furrow between his brows. He’s picking at a hole in the knee of his jeans, further fraying the edges. “Why would you ask that?”
He sighs, slumping into himself in a way that makes him look small. “I’m glad I’m here, okay?” he asks, not waiting for her to answer before he continues. “Steve’s great, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything. But, you still lied to me—"
"We never lied to you," she cuts in, and he waves his hand in assent.
"Yeah, yeah, but you all like, conspired behind my back, and that feels…”
“Shitty,” she continues for him when he seems to lose his words.
“Yeah! Shitty, it feels shitty that you were all talking about me behind my back all so you could keep this from me."
Chrissy sighs. She’d known they’d have to talk about it eventually–clear all this stale air so they could move on–but it doesn’t make it any less uncomfortable. But, he’s right; no matter their intentions, they’d all made a mess of things. She’d known that even as she’d been in the thick of it.
So, she starts where these things should always start, and looks him dead in the eye as she says, “I’m sorry.”
He finally looks up, seeming almost surprised. “Just like that?”
“Yes, Eddie, just like that,” she replies, maintaining eye contact even as her gut squirms. “We were just trying to protect each other, but that doesn’t mean it was the right choice.”
His eyes are wide, still shocked, and she wonders, something uncomfortably close to pity bubbling up within her, if he’s not used to receiving apologies at all.
“Both of you?” he asks.
Chrissy averts her gaze, mouth twisting up. “You know how Steve said Jason has been kind of stalkery?” she asks, watching Eddie nod out of the corner of her eye before she continues. “Well, it was worse before. He kept coming to my house and cornering me at school, and I just wanted to move on.”
It was more than that, though. She still remembers the way fear crept down her spine as cold sweat when she’d opened her door to Jason smiling at her like they’d never broken up, the way her throat had closed up when he’d scooted far too close to her side at the lunch table.
The way he kept cornering her in the hallway when no one was around to witness it.
“So, when I found Steve trying to write that first letter, I struck a deal,” she continues. She feels bad about that, even now, even still. “He’d be my boyfriend, and I’d help him with the letters.”
She finally turns back to Eddie, braced for, what? Condemnation? But he’s squinting at her like she’s a puzzle he’s trying to crack as he says, “you totally would have helped him anyway,” with so much conviction that it warms her.
“Oh, definitely.”
He’s still looking at her, but he’s smiling at her, eyes warmer than she’s ever seen them.
“Alright, I forgive you,” Eddie says, like it’s easy.
It’s too easy.
“Just because we had reasons doesn’t mean it was fair to you,” she replies, steel in her voice as she squares her shoulders and looks at him dead on. “It doesn’t mean you weren’t hurt,” she finishes, reaching out to pat his knee.
He doesn’t jerk away, just looks at her hand on his knee with a peculiar smile on his face. “You know there was a time when you touching me like that would’ve sent me into a tizzy,” he says, still looking down at her hand.
“And now?”
“Nothing,” he replies, shrugging. “It was never you, Chrissy Cunnigham.”
“You either, Eddie Munson,” she replies, matching his smile as she smacks his hand once before withdrawing. “Now is that it, or was there something else you needed?”
He looks away, cheeks darkening to a blotchy red, she’s almost worried he’ll faint. “I, uh, well, the jacket?”
She thinks of Eddie’s jacket beneath her first, but that’s not where he’s looking. His eyes are planted firmly on the sleeve of Steve’s letterman with a sort of longing that’s almost funny in its intensity.
She doesn’t ask any follow up questions—if he wants the jacket, he can have the jacket. After all, it’s Steve’s no matter how attached to it she’s become, and Steve had looked up at him with the sappiest look she’s ever seen on his face.
She’d do more than give up his letterman to keep him happy.
Still, it feels strange when she pulls it off her back. A shiver runs through her–she feels almost naked without its familiar weight.
Since that first day in the library, it’s been her shield against Jason’s pushy advances, and her reminder that, no matter what happens, she’d still have Steve.
But, Jason’s backed off, and everywhere she turns, she sees her people: Steve, yes, but Jeff, and Eddie, and the Hellfire boys–even Robin. Her life’s full to bursting in a way that it’s never been before.
Chrissy will miss it, but she doesn’t need it anymore. Besides, she knows where Steve keeps his spare key, and she’s not above stealing something else from his closet.
“Jeff’s going to be sad,” she says, patting the bundled fabric in her arms like it’s a favored family pet, feeling strangely choked up. “He really liked it.”
Eddie grimaces down at it and asks, “do I need to get this thing dry cleaned?”
Chrissy throws her head back and laughs. “No, but if you would’ve waited a few more days, you might have.”
He makes a gagging noise, but when she holds it out for him, he readily takes it, even if he doesn’t put it on. She wonders if it’s fear of homophobes or the thought of her and Jeff’s bodily fluids that stops him. She’s polite enough not to ask, even as Eddie says, “Wait, is it you wearing it or him that Jeff likes?”
She opens her mouth to reply, ready to offer up a vague “both,” but Eddie holds up his hand and cuts her off, talking quickly like he’s afraid of what she might say. “Wait, don’t tell me. I really, really don’t need to know.”
Chrissy springs to her feet and picks Eddie’s own leather jacket up off the floor and sliding it on. It’s even baggier than Steve’s was on her, clearly designed for layering. “I’m borrowing this,” she says, turning her back on him and making her way toward her next class just as the warning bell rings. “It’s cold today.”
“Don’t do any weird sex things with it!” Eddie calls.
She laughs again, making a point to neither confirm nor deny her intentions no matter what he yells after her retreating back.
When Jeff slides into her passenger seat after school, he quirks a brow at her new look, and asks, “that Eddie’s?” as he buckles his seatbelt.
“He wanted Steve’s,” she says, reaching out to pat his knee consolingly.
“I’m going to miss that jacket,” Jeff sighs, looking genuinely forlorn for a second before he gets a particular gleam in his eye that Chrissy’s becoming increasingly familiar with. “You know—”
“Eddie requested that we don’t ‘do any weird sex things’ with his jacket,” she cuts in, putting her car in reverse and slowly backing out of the spot.
Jeff groans like he’d been shot, and throws his head back into the headrest. She reaches out to dig her fingernails into his knee, just this side of too-hard so his groan shifts into a hiss.
“I know, baby,” she says, smiling sweetly at him as they pull away from the school. “But, I’ll get your mind off it in no time.”
Jeff gulps, and doesn’t utter another complaint for the rest of the night.
***
Robin watches Chrissy follow Eddie out of the cafeteria. Even after the door closes behind them, she keeps staring, wanting desperately to know what they’re talking about. This might have all started because of her crush on Chrissy, but Robin’s nosy at heart, so even as the flames of her crush burn down to embers, she wants to know.
Steve had called her on Saturday, spilling all the details of what sounded like a truly horrible date as if it was some sort of fairy tale while Robin cackled in his ear. But he’d sounded buoyant with exhilaration, and all Robin had been able to think about was that he’s like her and he’s happy.
Maybe there’s hope for her, too.
Robin’s broken out of her reverie by a shoulder bumping into hers. “Should we help him?” Vickie whispers, and it takes Robin a minute to snap her eyes away from her vibrant green eyes to follow her gaze over to Steve.
All the losers he’s still pretending to be friends are jeering at him, Tommy H. going so far as to slip into Chrissy’s vacant seat so he can jostle Steve around with a decidedly unfriendly look on his face while Steve picks halfheartedly at his lunch.
Robin’s out of her seat before she can even think about it, palms slapping noisily on the table as she calls. “Harrington!” Steve perks up, metaphorical tail wagging as he meets her eyes from across the room. “Come help me win a bet!”
He’s up and out of his seat in a matter of seconds, leaving the remains of his lunch abandoned on his table as he trots over, slipping into the empty seat across from her while all the other band kids look at him like he’s got the plague.
“What’s the bet?” he asks, looking far more relaxed already than he had while surrounded by his supposed friends.
Robin kicks him under the table as she replies, “the bet was whether you’d come when you’re called.”
“Oh, hardy har har,” he mocks, kicking her right back until she links both her feet around his ankle and yanks him so he damn near falls off his seat.
“Poor little puppy,” she coos, reaching across the table to pat his head while he bats her hand away.
Vickie’s laughing from beside her; it rings through Robin’s ears like church bells. She gets stuck, staring at the pink of her cheeks, the red of her hair, the mirth in her emerald green eyes, hand still outstretched toward Steve’s hair.
He kicks her again, and she snatches her hand back, grateful for the intervention until she catches sight of the knowing look Steve’s shooting her. In retaliation, she grabs one of her carrot sticks and tries to shove it down his throat.
“Not a word, Harrington, or we’re through,” she hisses, finally succeeding in shoving the carrot into his mouth.
“You guys are so funny,” Vickie says, still laughing.
Steve smiles, carrot sticking out of his mouth like it’s a cigar until he bites into it with a snap, seeming oddly satisfied.
Chrissy and Eddie don’t come back, and by the time lunch is over, the rest of the band kids have finally stopped sitting there like scared lemmings, waiting for King Steve Harrington to attack. She’s sure they’ll soon learn what Robin already knows: the king is dead, long live the king.
She loves him so much, it’s almost stupid.
“So, Steve Harrington, huh?” Vickie asks, inexplicably walking out of the cafeteria with her even though Robin knows for a fact her class is on the opposite side of the school.
“I mean, yeah?” Robin replies, feeling her face heat from the inside out. “He’s just like, not what I was thinking at all, and maybe the best friend I’ve ever had, which is crazy—it’s crazy, because it’s Steve Harrington, right?” Her hands, she realizes with horror, are miming an explosion above her head while her mouth makes a weird, crackling explosion sound. “Who would’ve guessed?”
When she finally gets her mouth flapping under control, Vickie’s smiling at her, walking close enough that the sleeve of her sweater brushes against Robin’s bare arm.
“I don’t know, I always thought he seemed nice.”
Robin’s nodding along like one of those bobble head hula girls that boys are always putting in their cars, even though Steve Harrington isn’t nice. He’s an unmitigated bitch with a sacrificial streak a mile wide, but he’s not nice.
“He’s like a stray that I let into my house one time, and then my mom fed him, so now he keeps following me home,” her mouth says.
Vickie’s mouth laughs in return, so maybe it’s not all that bad.
Robin’s mind replays the angelic sound as she walks into her class, waving goodbye to Vickie as the other girl rushes away in a mad dash to make it on time to her next class.
God, Steve’s going to be such a bitch about this.
***
After Eddie’s talk with Chrissy, things shift.
Steve doesn’t sit with the jocks at all anymore. He and Chrissy, still joined at the hip like they really are dating, shift back and forth between the band geeks and the hellfire tables at lunch on Tuesday, prompting hushed whispers to filter through the entire cafeteria.
For his part, all Gareth says is, “does this mean you two’s weird feud over Chrissy is finally over?”
Jeff snorts chocolate milk out of his nose while Eddie laughs so hard he nearly falls off the bench entirely, only staying upright because Steve props him up.
“What?” Gareth demands, tearing into his chicken strips with a viciousness that betrays his ire.
“They’ll tell you when you’re older,” Doug replies despite having no idea himself.
Eddie loves his friends so fucking much.
By Wednesday, a clearly fed up Robin frog-marches the pair of them to the Hellfire table and plops down beside them.
“Munson, I can’t do this split custody thing anymore,” she says, making the red-head that’d followed her over giggle. “They’re too much of a handful.”
“Or maybe even two handfuls,” Steve replies, across the table at her like he’s not playing the most overt game of footsie right below it.
“Don’t be gross, dingus,” she scoffs, and Eddie’s mind goes galloping off with thoughts he shouldn’t be having in a room full of teenagers just waiting to push someone a few more rungs down the ladder.
“Are you guys coming back to Hellfire?” Gareth asks, clearly unable to stand not knowing what’s going on a second longer.
Steve looks at Eddie, brown eyes devastating beneath his lashes. “I’d like to.”
Eddie opens his mouth, ready to grovel at Steve’s feet to get him to come, to get him to keep looking at him like that, but then Robin cuts in with a sly, “you know this means you’ll have to come to Steve’s basketball games,” and he slams his mouth shut.
Steve grins, all seduction dropping off his face as he reaches across the table to give Robin a high five like they’re already on the fucking court. She slaps his palm hard enough that the sound of skin on skin damn-near shatters the sound barrier.
“We can sit together,” Jeff says, but he’s not even looking at Eddie, eyes trained on Chrissy’s blushing face. “It’ll be fun.”
Eddie groans and lets gravity overtake him, dropping his head to the table so suddenly that it would have hurt if Steve hadn’t put his palm over the spot just in time. Eddie turns his face so he can glare up at the other boy, but Steve looks so hopeful and excited that he has to look away again, burying his face into Steve’s palm.
“Fine, I’ll go,” he drawls, lips brushing against Steve’s hand with each word.
“What the hell is happening?” Gareth demands.
Much to his dismay, no one replies.
Things slide back to normal after that—Chrissy and Steve showing up to band practice and hellfire and lunch like nothing had ever come between them. But, it’s better now because Steve knocks their feet together beneath tables, and lets his hands settle on knees and stares just a little too long at Eddie’s lips.
It’s driving him crazy; he wants to reach out and touch, reach out and take.
But that’s not something that’s allowed. Boys are born in their own, invisible bubbles to keep them from touching other boys. Eddie doesn’t know how he never noticed it before, but he wants to shatter it like glass, let it cut up his feet if it means he can brush his lips against Steve’s.
There are all these rules left unwritten, but flung at their feet like slurs: don’t stand too close, don’t look too long, don’t dare to touch.
He wants to, though, thinks maybe in the confines of Gareth’s garage and behind the closed doors of the drama room he could, and it would be safe.
But they live in Hawkins, Indiana, and he’d like to live long enough to get the hell out of here.
So he lets their feet tangle beneath tables and doesn’t lean across them to have a taste, no matter how often Steve licks his lips.
Friday can’t come soon enough.
***
Robin’s been twitchy for days by the time she pulls Steve into their bathroom stall. He follows her dutifully, only laughing a little as she pulls a towel out of her backpack and lays it down before sitting on the floor.
“You plan this, Birdie?” he asks, settling across from her, the towel beneath them insulating him from the cold that’s seeping up from the floor.
Robin’s face turns a blotchy red like a blood vessel burst and dispersed beneath her skin. “Boobies,” she blurts, staring at him with beseeching eyes before she slaps her hand over her mouth, eyes wide.
Steve nods, his attempt at sage wisdom undercut by the way he has to bite his lip to stop from laughing at her. “Boobies, yes,” he chokes out. “I’ve, uh, heard of them.”
That’s all it takes for Robin to kick out at him. When her foot gets dangerously close to his crotch, Steve grabs her ankle and cradles her foot in his lap, rubbing the bone.
“Don’t make fun of me!” she whines, still trying to kick him.
“Okay, okay!” he cries out, chuckling as he holds onto her leg for dear life. “Sorry, just—what’s this about boobies?”
“Stop saying boobies!”
Steve uses his free hand to lock up his mouth and toss the invisible key into the toilet, smiling as the blush on Robin’s cheeks creeps up her nose and onto her forehead until she resembles an especially square tomato.
“Vickie—”
And Steve can’t help it, he really, really can’t. “Has nice boobies?” he cuts in, already grabbing at both her legs to stop her jackrabbiting feet from finally landing a blow to his balls.
“I hate you!” Robin shrieks, but even she’s laughing now as she writhes atop the towel, scrunching it as she earth-worm-inches closer to him so she can slap at his ribs while he’s defenseless. “Steve Harrington, you’re the worst thing that ever happened to me!”
She tries to say it with conviction, but Steve’s hands have crept beneath her crew socks, and his fingers are tickling against the inside arch of her foot, so her words come out more as shaky exhalations of laughter. He wiggles his fingers as she squirms away, kicking out with such reckless abandon that one of her feet breaks free and kicks him far too high on his inner thigh for comfort.
“Get your boy cooties off me!” she demands, and he does, pulling his hands out of her socks as she backs away until she’s leaning against the opposite side of the wall again, pouting at him. “You’re the worst.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he replies, feeling lighter than air. “Now tell me about Vickie’s girl cooties.”
Robin smiles bashfully, pulling her knees up to her chest and hugging them. “Vickie doesn’t have cooties,” Robin replies, gaze distant. She looks wistful, enamored, hopeful. “She walked me to class the other day, even though I know it made her late.”
“Yeah?” Steve prompts, helpless to do anything but to smile back.
“Yeah,” she replies. “And maybe it’ll be like Chrissy again, you know? But you and Eddie…” Robin kicks out at him again, nudging her foot into his and then leaving it there, their soles pressed together. “Maybe there’s more of us out there than I thought.”
“Yeah,” Steve breathes, absolutely in love with brave, hopeful, honest Robin, here in this stall, in this moment. “Maybe there are.”
They smile at each other, two queer kids in the bathroom together, seeing themselves in each other, again, and again, and again. Steve hopes they’ll always be like this, here, on the bathroom floor, finding hope in each other’s smiles. He has Chrissy, and Jeff, and Eddie now, too. But, Robin will always be the first person who looked at him and made him feel seen.
“We should get married,” he says, not thinking about it before it comes out of his mouth and hangs in the air between them, making Robin’s eyes bug out of her skull. “Just think about it! Eddie and I can’t get married, and neither can you and Vickie—”
“You’ve literally gone out with the guy once, and we don’t even know if Vickie likes girls yet—”
“—but we could totally just marry each other instead!”
The silence of the bathroom rings once Steve’s declaration is out there. Robin swallows, throat bobbing, eyes wide enough that Steve can see the little red veins near the back. Suddenly, Steve wonders if he’s stepped over some line he didn’t even know was there.
Before he can spiral too far, Robin launches herself across the space between them, knees bracketing Steve’s hips as she leans over and bites his shoulder, hard.
“Ow, Robin!”
“You’re insane, Dingus, you know that?” she asks, moving away from his shoulder to plant a kind of wet kiss against his forehead. “I’m sixteen, and you’re proposing in the boy’s bathroom.”
She rubs her hand against his head, likely fucking his hair up beyond repair, but he doesn’t even care because she kisses him again, this time on the top of his head.
“I meant like, later?” Steve says shyly.
He’s always fallen hard and fast, knows that about himself. It’s a fundamental law of the universe: gravity makes things fall down, the earth’s always spinning on an axis, and Steve Harrington puts his whole heart into people who don’t always give it back.
But Robin’s on his lap, kissing his head, and leaking what’s either snot or tears into his hair. “Alright,” she warbles, sounding embarrassingly soggy. “When I get a girlfriend, we can just be permanent beards for each other.”
Steve puts his arms around her and hugs her tight, mashing his face awkwardly into her neck as she laughs. “Grow old in separate bedrooms,” he replies.
“Gotta keep our cooties separate,” she says, like she’s not currently dripping on him on the floor of the boy’s grimy bathroom.
He just squeezes her tighter and gives her a little shake, like a dog with its favorite toy. “Tell me about Vickie,” he demands, but it sounds a whole lot like I love you when it comes from his mouth.
“Okay,” she replies, and it sounds a lot like I love you, too.
PART 21
#koko's steddie secret admirer au#steddie#my fic#me in a steddie fic: but what if robin and steve get married#also shoutout to gareth for now being the oblivious one
357 notes
·
View notes
Text
Cinematics
A/N. this is set in the modern era, so basically the marauders but it’s in 2024, no voldemort, everyone is just happy and alive !! plus this isnso bad istg💀🙏 im so sorry
summary. looking back on soft launching your relationship with Severus during your youthful years at hogwarts and comparing it to present time
requested. yes || no
not.yn
liked by s.snape, jamie.potter, b.rregulus and 17 others
not.yn Hey lover<3
ׂ╰➤ jamie.potter, b.rregulus and 3 others commented
jamie.potter maybe the schools weirdo can pull after all
b.rregulus when???? what???
lils.evans so happy for the both of u!! >w<
╰➤ jamie.potter yh me too or whateverׂ
╰➤ not.yn simp
posted 8 years ago
s.snape
liked by not.yn, lils.evans, rj.lupin and 39 others
s.snape You’re my, my, my.. My kind of woman 🤍
╰➤ not.yn, lils.evans, and 6 others commented
not.yn 🤍🤍🤍
lils.evans the best couple at hogwarts 🥰
╰➤ jamie.potter what about uss 💔
╰➤ rj.lupin and you called severus weird…
╰➤ jamie.potter THAT WAS IN 4TH YEAR???? STOP??
╰➤ s.snape i know what you did
╰➤ jamie.potter IM LIT GETTING ATTACKED RN YOU FORGAVE US LIKE HALF A YEAR AGO??
╰➤ not.yn bully allert cancel him🙏
posted 7 years ago
mary.macd0nald
liked by s.snape, b.rregulus, mars.mckinns and 25 others
mary.macd0nald enemies to friends (and some to lovers) 🌻
╰➤ not.yn, lils.evans, and 2 others commented
not.yn never would’ve thought we would all be a big friend group one day 🥹🤍
╰➤ s.snape tell me about it
lils.evans yesterday was so funn!! love you guys
mars.mckinns we need to do this again sometime!
posted 7 years ago
not.yn
liked by s.snape, jamie.potter, lils.evans, mary.mcd0nald and 68 others
not.yn welcome to the world baby girl 🤍 13/10/2024
╰➤lils.evans, s.black and 7 others commented
s.snape my two beautiful girls ❤️
lils.evans shes so cute 💞 proud of you mama
s.black uncles are gonna teach her how to have fun 🥰
╰➤ not.yn hell nah 🤺🤺
╰➤ jamie.potter hell yes ;)
╰➤ rj.lupin leave the poor baby alone she hasn’t even been home for a week yet (congratulation 🤍)
mary.macd0nald was just looking back on our teenage years!! so happy to have a new addition to our little group ❤️
b.rregulus can’t wait to meet her
mars.mckinns girl that speed ticket to the hospital was so worth it. happy for the both of you ❤️
posted 1 month ago
“Hun, what are you doing?” Severus whispered as he closed the door of your daughters room. He layed down on the coach next to you, putting a hand over your shoulders to bring you close, a smile spreading across your face, heart thumping even after so many years of being together. Severus looks down at your phone and his eyes turn to one of shock once he notices the photos he thought he’d never see again.
“You still have those? Thought you deleted them since it was like.. when we were 16?” He raised a brow and scrolled through the many pictures that had been taken in your younger years. “Yeah I just felt.. nostalgic. I’ve never deleted them off my account and I don’t plan to.” A chuckle leaves Severus’ throat and shows you the picture of him you took at the time you announced your relationship, putting it next to his face. “You think I’ve changed much?”
“Not really, you just don’t have your long-long hair anymore. We’re just 23 Severus, what were you expecting at this age? Wrinkles?” You flick his forehead and he winces sarcastically, giving you a dramatic pained expression. “You hurt me, darling.” He sits up and cups your cheek, pulling you into his lap with a sweet smile. “And I must say you’ve grown out of your shy phase and you do smile a lot more.. however I can’t say the same when were around other people.” You smirk, tucking a strand of loose hair behind his ear. “And you haven’t grown out of your constant teasing.” He grunted into your neck and embraced you to hide the small smile forming on his lips. “What can I say? I guess adulthood hasn’t quite kicked in yet.”
However your statement got cut short once you heard your daughters sobs, which died down just as quick as they started. A sigh of relief escaped your lips as Severus breathed out a laugh. “You were saying?” He whispered, looking deep into your eyes im which he could’ve gotten lost in during that very moment. He lifted you in his arms and walked with you in his arms to your bedroom, laying you down onto the bed.
“How about we.. get a bit more nostalgic tonight, hm?”
© URFAVLARRY
DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE OR COPY ANY OF MY WRITING TO OTHER PLATFORMS
#ᯓ★ urfavlarry#severus snape x y/n#severus snape x you#severus x reader#severus snape x reader#severus snape fanfiction#severus snape#young severus#snape x reader#snape#harry potter x reader#harry potter fanfiction#young snape x reader
34 notes
·
View notes
Note
https://www.tumblr.com/peachhcs/767959888939941888/httpswwwtumblrcompeachhcs767185748593164288
don’t apologize love writing takes time!
i love them and so glad they are communicating well ! i see will just taking more time to reassure making sure she feels a bit better more and maybe he starts calling her first more just to talk more and it helps a lot
maybe because she is hurt and cant play she comes to visit will for while doing some of her school online and it helps them a lot
part 10!! wow i can’t believe this accumulated so many parts. i think i’m gonna split this into two and make samy visiting will in california it’s own post if that’s ok and that’s what y’all want :) so sorry this one is a bit shorter than the others 😖
au masterlist
part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9
it’d been almost three weeks since samy’s shoulder injury. she was getting a lot better every week and pt was for sure helping, but she still couldn’t play. the doctors hadn’t cleared her yet, so instead, the brunette was stuck doing what little she could at practice like legs or any footwork the coach had the girls work on.
she was bit discouraged because it was the first time since she started soccer that she couldn’t play every single day. it wasn’t something samy was used to, especially being so stationary all the time.
she left practice early wednesday night after not having anything to do. hannah was still in class when samy got into their apartment and that’s when her phone started loudly vibrating in her backpack.
“what the hell,” the soccer player cursed to herself as she dropped her backpack onto the ground and began rummaging through it.
she got her hands on her phone in the second pocket, her slight frustration turning to happiness when she saw will’s name on the screen.
“hi, will,” samy smiled when his face appeared.
“hey, pretty. what are you doing?” the blonde wondered while samy shuffled into her room to talk.
“came back from practice early today. there wasn’t a lot i could do today, so i just left,” the brunette shrugged, falling back onto her bed.
“i’m sorry. how’s the shoulder?”
“it’s fine. i guess i’m just bored and wish i could be playing instead of sitting around all day,” the two shared a frown at her words.
“have you tried doing other things that don’t involve using your arms? walking? running?” will suggested.
“yeah, but it bores me really quickly. i think i need things that are high intensity and quick moving. walking is a bit too slow for me,” samy chuckled to herself.
“figures. you did grow up doing the most contact, quick moving sports.”
“how are you though? how’s everything?” samy changed the subject. she didn’t really like talking about herself that much so she always made it a point to ask will about his day.
“i’m good. practice has been long, but it’s been fine. i miss you,” will hummed and that made the girl smile. even though they did just see each other about two and a half weeks ago, they’ll always miss one another no matter how much time passed since last time.
“i’m glad everything’s going well. coach didn’t kill you too hard for just leaving without a word?”
“no..not really. i do have to, uh, clean the rink after every practice for the next like month, but hey i’ll take it,” the blonde shrugged and it always amazed samy how nonchalant will could be about hockey sometimes because if that were her, she’d probably be freaking out more.
“well, i admire your coolness about it. thanks for coming to visit again, by the way. i liked seeing you and hopefully we can see one another again soon,” the brunette grinned.
“you know, i’ve actually been kind of thinking about that. since you aren’t really playing because of your shoulder..i was wondering if you..wanted to take that opportunity to come to san jose for the first time since you and my mom and sister dropped me off here?” will asked like he was asking his mom to let him spend the night at someone’s house when he was younger.
a flush rose to samy’s cheeks, “like..come to san jose? i-i don’t really have money or anything..”
“i’ll buy your ticket,” the boy immediately cut in.
“i can’t ask you to do that. we’ve talked about this, will,” samy flushed some more.
“i know, i know, but i figured it could take your mind off of things for a weekend? i can show you around san jose some more, we can do whatever you want really. plus, i have the money. i don’t mind. i wanna see you,” will explained his reasoning making samy’s flush turn into a pink blush on her cheeks.
“i wanna see you too. you really don’t mind buying my ticket? i..i don’t wanna make you think i’m like relying on you to do that..”
“baby, i promise you’re not. i want to. let me buy it for you and anything else you want when you come visit?” will cheered and samy rolled her eyes.
“maybe not that far, but i guess a trip to san jose won’t hurt. i have been trying to figure out when i can come visit you,” a smile crept its way onto will’s lips the more samy’s decision leaned to yes.
“exactly. let me at least take some of the burden off of you by buying your plane ticket.”
it seemed to be decided as the brunette slowly gave in. her smile turned into a grin and so did will’s seeing her pretty face. “okay, okay, i’ll come visit. next weekend i have no tests or anything to worry about,” the hughes decided.
“yes! i knew i could convince you. i’ll buy them right now,” will exclaimed and the girl giggled as she watched her boyfriend open up his laptop.
“i love you,” samy hummed.
“i love you, too,” will blew her a kiss through the phone which samy caught. she held her hand to her heart and giggled when will spun his computer around to show her the tickets he was thinking about buying.
#will smith hockey#hughes!sister x will smith au#samy x will#samy hughes#will smith x oc#will smith imagine#boston college hockey#boston college#uofmichigan#umich hockey#will smith hockey fluff#ws6#wsh2#umich soccer#umich wolverines#umich blurb#umich imagine#umich fic#bc eagles#bc hockey#san jose sharks#sjs#sj sharks#nhl#nhl hockey#boston college hockey blurb#boston college hockey imagine#boston college imagine#nhl fic#nhl blurb
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
In November of last year I decided that I was going to read a book a week. This was a weird challenge because I had been incapable of reading more than a page without my mind being distracted. I decided that this had to end. We're almost in December and I've read 55 books so far. So I wanted to tell you guys how I did it.
First, a few rules I've made up : - If I read two books during one week, I don't have to read and/or finish anything the following week. - This is not a race ! I'm basically aiming for 4 books a month more than 1 book a week. I've finished reading 3 books in June but finished reading 5 in July to "compensate". Some advices on how to get back into reading :
1. READ IN YOUR MOTHER LANGUAGE : Out of the 55 books I've read only 10 were in English, the rest were in French (my mother language). Listen, I know you're fluent in this and that but hear me out : I don't care. Think of your poor brain, with the attention span of a wooden spoon. Don't make it harder on yourself and read a book in your damn mother language !
2. LENGTH OF THE BOOKS You use to read 500-page books in a few days as a child / teenager ? Me too, but again, you wouldn't join a marathon right now just because you did one 10 years ago, you have to start slowly. So avoid dense books when you start (aim between 10 and 300 pages, not above for now).
3. UNTOUCHED PILE OF BOOKS For the love of the universe, don't even look at that pile of books next to your bed or in your living room. It doesn't exist, okay ? You could not read them before, you will not suddenly be able to read them now. You're not ready for this.
4. LIBRARY But If I can't look at the pile of untouched books in my home, what do I do ? You go to your local library (hopefully you have access to it) and what you're going to do is simple : you're not going to meticulously pick one book, no no you're going to walk around and take 4-5 books with you. Why ? Because this isn't a punishment, you have to enjoy your reading experience. Which brings me to my next point...
5. LETTING GO Something that I found hard at first and that I still struggle with : if a book doesn't interest you YOU CLOSE IT AND YOU TAKE ANOTHER ONE. Same thing if you realize the content is just too much for you, YOU CLOSE THE BOOK AND YOU TAKE ANOTHER ONE. Personally, I really wanted to read "Little Life" by Hanya Yanagihara. I couldn't do it, it was too much. I almost dreaded opening the book, so I put it aside. One day I'll read it, or maybe not, and that's okay. No one is going to punish you for not finishing a book, nobody cares (this is not highschool). That's why I take 5 books each time I go to the library. Sometimes I'm lucky, and every book is great, sometimes only one of them is okay. You've read 100 pages already and don't feel like continuing ? No one cares, close the book !!! Once I've started doing that I felt so much better, no more pressure to quickly finish a book I didn't actually enjoy.
6. NONFICTION Don't read nonfiction at first. Some of you might have attention span issues, some might have anxiety, depression, trouble sleeping making it all impossible to stay focus on a book : don't make it harder on yourself by reading nonfiction, it has to be a pleasurable experience. Reading about water pollution isn't going to put you in the mood to read (or to sleep better for that matter (Trust me, I've tried it)). So please fiction only : fantasy, adventures, dragons, romance, something light !
7. STUPID BOOKS Something light ? Well, the first books I've read were almost exclusively out of the teenagers/young adults section. Listen, I know some of you are not teenagers or (according to google) not even the target audience for the "young adult section" BUT those books are easy to read and some of them are quite enjoyable even for an "older" person. For example, the third book I've read was "L'année de Grace" (The Grace Year) by Kim Liggett and I enjoyed it a lot. Some of the books I've read were not winning literature prize kind of books and some were meant for teenagers and you know what ? I don't care, some were so bad that they made me laugh out loud, sending screenshots of awful dialogues to my friends. I've enjoyed reading them and that's all that matters ! I've read a book called "A connecticut Fashonista in King Arthur's court" by Marianna Mancusi , and let me tell you, it was stupid, so stupid that I couldn't wait to get home to see what else would happen. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone, but I still really loved reading it.
8. THEATER PLAY -> Short / funny / well written, go for it. I've read Corneille, Edmond Rostand, Marivaux, Cocteau. You could finish some of them in an hour !
9. TIME Now, one thing I have to concede is that reading takes time and I'm not a student AND I have a non brain-frying stable job, so I do have some time on my hands. Some of you might not have said time, BUT some of you also spend a lot of time on your phones. I've found myself gravitating toward a book more than my phone once I found good books to read. I used to watch tv-shows and youtube videos a lot, but I've slowed down since I started reading more (it's even starting to become a problem because I'm not hearing my target languages as much as I used to). 10. CONCLUSION SO FAR I still struggle to read non-fiction for more than 5 minutes, and unfortunately the majority of the untouched books in my living room are not cute adventure stories...However, while on holiday, I've read an 800-page novel in 3 days like I used to do while I was a teenager, and it made me feel really happy. 11. FINAL WORDS OF ADVICE : Reading is great BUT some of you are too stressed/anxious/in the middle of your studies, so don't even think of starting this kind of challenge. Relax, go to bed, go walk in the sun, have fun with your friends, take care of yourself. I used to be so angry at myself for not being able to read, but now I realize that I was in a very stressful moment in my life and I think my brain just wanted me to relax. Forcing myself to read 10-25 pages a day was only hurting me in the end. Only when my situation got much better did I even think of starting this challenge. While I don't think I said anything that you guys have heard before, I hope it can still be of some help to some of you !
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
next vids
#sol txt.#once i finish my thesis that is soo#this is like a next 3-6 months they will be up#cinta vid bc my friend asked me & i love her#nolden vid & a general expanse one#maybee i'll try doing a eeaao one too#idk at what order but i have the music chosen for cinta but we'll see
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
i run out of ideas for cayde
#in the end i still don't know how to draw him#you know#after i played this game for a year and he died in front of my fucking face#i still hate bungie for doing that#someone please add him back to the game#my inspirations are from actually playing the game i can't do this without him#i don't even wanna play the game now#(unless there's big fluffy huggable elliksni in the next episode mmmmmmmmmmmm)#i said i love him the most but seriously i can't come up with good plot for him#just like houndy. yeah.#and im not doing his portrait again i will literally vomit#i don't even wanna look for it to know when i did that#must be at least 3 months ago considering im being consumed by wf#sigh#how the hell do you draw faces#destiny 2#destiny hunter#cayde 6#destiny 2 art#my art
214 notes
·
View notes
Text
I met the me who made different choices
#idk what this means so dont ask#got the words stuck in my head and this is what I wanted to draw for it immediately#me at my desk. so.#I dont look exactly like this obviously. doesnt matter. anyways#hard time recently in a lot of different ways#lots of work to do!#given up on getting everything done I kind of failed at that. it was too much#so now I'm just trying to get anything done that will make the next 6 months not kill me again#ideally. 3 episodes. or the book#or like at least close enough to that that its basically that#I'm feeling really screwed LOL#I dont know how I've been working every day for so long and still havent done enough...#(its because the work load is way too much)#every time I take 1 hour for myself. to cook. or clean. or draw something else. or play a game. I feel so guilty auauau#I hate webtoon I hate this damn green app...#DOESNT MATTER!!!#what DOES matter is my art is good as hell... look at this shit...#the light. the colors. I love you red I love you green#I need to get more red pants I only have the one pair.#I saw this guy with red pants that had skeleton legs on them and I was like FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!! I need them!!!!#I need to start sewing again. I dont have a sewing machine cause my apartment is too small so I havent sewn in years but I really want to..#I want to make clothes again... I need some vests I need some dresses..#I will not make pants or sleeved shirts because I dont hate myself#sketch#art#vent art I guess LMFAO its not#its just this fun little thing we like to call self expression#also this isnt how my desk setup actually is I scooted things around cause I didnt wanna draw anything twice. fuck it we ball#ok back to work
149 notes
·
View notes
Text
dr s2 spoilers under cut
Jay, you lost in your first round, stfu
#ok guys yes I like part 2#But I'm going to bully Jay for the next 6 months to cope with how they introduced him as an antagonist and then defeat him in 3 minutes#My guy explains his backstory after the merge loses the fight doesn't elaborate breaks up with his fiancée and leaves#Amazing#ninjago#ninjago dragons rising#ninjago spoilers#ninjago dragons rising s2#ninjago dr spoilers
76 notes
·
View notes
Text
Behold. A tangible representation of 8+ hours of my life: crochet pumpkins made for my sister
#crochet#pumpkins#fall#i am so tired dude#the big one alone took more than 5 hours#it uses a very labor intensive stitch#and obviously it's quite large#also I got like 1/3 thru it at first and had to undo it bc i made a big mistake#but i didn't factor that into my time calculation#just the one I'm giving her is like 5-6 hours of work easily#while I love doing things for people I love this was a good reminder why i don't work freelance#and why I don't set up an Etsy shop like people keep saying i could#this was a lot of crocheting in not much time and I'm really happy to be done with it#i wanted to do other things during this time but didn't feel like I could. and i got really tired of it#which is a bummer bc i crochet for enjoyment not extra cash or anything#so I'd prefer to enjoy it#I'll have to do a different hobby for a couple months haha#anyway admire my pumpkins!#soon they will be on their way to a good home#and if you're about to ask if you can buy some#the answer is no. sorry#😅 I'm not doing this again until next year at least#id in alt text
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
sneepy cozy time....
#cats#longing to one day hopefully feel sleepy cozy like this again...#There was a pretty cool week here so I thought we had progressed closer to cool fall weather but... NO#..wrong!! It's like 80F in my room right now and was 98F outside yesterday. We get two more 'cooler' days and then#it starts going up again and will be in the high 90s possibly 100 something later this week#in my mind september should be COOOOOLLLL!!!!! or at least STARTING to get there.. Like mid 80s at the highest.#I am going to explode the world with evil wizard powers aaRGHaaHHHHHHHH#OR at least it should get down really low at night. I think thats the main thing is if it's 95 in the day and only 62 for like 3 hours in#the middle of the night then even leaving a fan in windows all night is not enough to fully cool down the house because its just not#enough cold air or cool for long enough. If it were 98 in the day but 15F outside at night then you could probably bring cool air inside al#night and your house would be at a relatively low starting point for the next days heat.#Like for example - in my apartment on a hot and sunny day. Even with every window#closed and blocked off with thick layers of reflective stuff and also not using the stove or doing anything to generate heat - the apartmen#will still go up on average about 6 - 8 degrees in one day. Peaking around 8 - 10pm night time. If I start off with the house cooled down#to 60F. then the highest it would get is 66 - 68 which is tolerable#.But if the lowest I can cool the apartment all night is still only 75F#then it's going to be 81 - 83F by the end of the day. So really it would be bearable (ISH)#for it to be warm as long as it was colder at night.#Though still the IDEAL is to not have to structure my life around envrionmental management and constantly be checking the#outdoor temperature so I can put the fans in the second that it's colder outside than it is inside and putting elaborate curtain systems#up and down at the exact right times and meal prepping 4 days in advance so I dont have to use the stove for 3 days and blah blah blah#Life in the colder weather months is so effortless and breezy in that sense. I can just have the window open all day and get natural light.#I can cook whatever I want. I can wear what I like. I can move around the house freely without needing to always#carry a fan around with me or douse myself in water.#ANYWAY.... oh if only that were me.... snuggled in a warm blanket ... a comforting wintery image...
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
MORE LIFE UPDATES YAY
HI SORRY I'VE BEEN AWOL
I got a surgery date for late October WOOO!! Which means I'm gonna be working my ASS off to raise enough money to not have to be paying medical bills for the rest of my life 🙃
Okay, I'm exaggerating a bit but ~$5000 is not a lot to have but IS a lot to owe, so I'm probably going to continue to be more away than not. But I haven't disappeared or lost interest in the fandom or my friends or my projects, I'm just FOCUSED AS FUCK
🫶🫶🫶
#i have like 3 VERY major changes coming up in the next 6 months and I'm very much trying to keep my head attached#they are positive life events/changes that I'm actively choosing but WOW A LITTLE SPACE WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE#oh well#my stuff
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
LOVE when the pharmacy decides to fucking dick around with my meds so badly that now I’m off my mood stabilizer, my pain meds, and my fucking birth control (in a few days) because they’re insisting I should have extra fucking bottles of each one and I DONT because they don’t let me pick up more than a one month supply of narcotics at a fucking time so do explain where these extra bottles are, hmm ????? and they didn’t have enough caplyta ordered last time to even give me my usual 3 months supply of that so … ???? get your fucking heads out of your asses and give me the fucking meds you owe me ??? like ??? but I’m in a nasty headspace right now so if I call the pharmacy this morning, I’m going to be that cunt ass customer they bitch about all day because this isn’t the first time they’ve done this. in fact, the first time, they straight up committed insurance fraud by marking one of my scripts as filled and picked up WHEN, IN REALITY, THEY FUCKING LOST THE SCRIPT AND HAD NO RECORD OF IT BEING FILLED OR PICKED UP IN THEIR SYSTEM, BUT YET, MARKED IT AS SUCH AND CHARGED MY INSURANCE AN ALMOST 8 GRAND FOR THE FUCKING 3 MONTHS OF MY MOOD STABILIZER THAT I. NEVER. RECEIVED. I’m genuinely about to report this entire pharmacy to the pharmacy board because I’m so fucking done with this place. it needs to be shut the fuck down because you’re telling me, out of an entire pharmacy, y’all share the same IQ point AND dead brain cell, collectively ??? then don’t fucking work in healthcare where people rely on you to know your shit and keep track of their fucking meds because you’re just constantly making shit worse on people since you can’t seem to not fuck around with these meds and not ‘lose’ scripts. fuck out of here.
and I’m pretty much out of weed, which is usually my back up pain management method, without the money to afford a delivery order by their cut off time to order in 3 hours because I just paid my fucking bills and have SOME to go towards it, but not enough for delivery to be free, and I’d still have to walk my ass to one of the ATM’s nearby because they don’t accept my bank as a prepaid method OR any of the cards I have on my person. 🫠
I can literally feel my back spasming and seizing on and off while I’m laying on my fucking side, I’ve had a migraine with a stupid ass aura for almost a week now because chronic migraines fucking suck and i was REALLY hoping this one would be over by now, my muscle inflammations that my pain meds are supposed to limit are already beginning to start their itching deep in my muscles so soon they’ll blossom into a whole fibromyalgia fucking episode and become entirely inflamed, my joints in my hands fucking hurt because of the dreary weather so I really need to get into a rheumatologist at some point soon as well and get that shit figured out, I’m nauseas as fuck from all the pain, and I’m moody, hormonal, and just feel like fucking death physically.
I’m just. I give up.
this shit is exhausting and painful and so mentally fucking taxing to constantly deal with and I just want a fucking break from all this fucking shit. I wish I could just … not exist … for even just a little while with how fucking painful existing actually feels right now 🫠😭
#i hate that CT weed is so fucking expensive#half a fucking ounce shouldn’t cost me $250 …….. not when I can go to MA and get an ounce for $108 after tax ……..#but I don’t have a way to MA because my fucking best friend. who made plans with me OVER THE WEEKEND. HER. SHE INITIATED THEM.#canceled on me last second even though I texted her early the night before when I know she would see it 🫠#nope instead she waited from the text I sent at 6:30pm until noon the next day to cancel because her period is kicking her ass#NOT FOR FUCKING NOTHING BUT SO THE HELL IS MINE ???? AND IM ANEMIC ??? AND DEALING WITH ALL THIS EXTRA PAIN ON TOP OF IT ????#and I know I’m being irrational and insensitive because pain tolerance is a sliding scale for everyone#but like fucking come on you do this 3 out of 4 times YOU make the plans to hang out and I’m fucking over it.#plus I’m the one that always pays for everything and does she ever even OFFER to hit me back for the COUNTLESS ounces of weed I’ve got her#all because she couldn’t afford it so I said I’d cover it and she never paid me back. I’ve bought her at least a grand’s worth of weed#just over the last couple months and she’s never ONCE offered to pay me back for a single one#like ……… I don’t expect it. I give if I have it. but you can’t even just offer ??? like the invitation to pay me back would be enough to no#leave m ragingly pissed off and feeling used as an atm again for yet another ‘friend’ because they don’t even OFFER to be considerate#of course I’d say not to worry about it but it doesn’t even cross your fucking head to ask if I want anything towards it#like the next time you get paid ??? when you go and spend your own money on weed that day but can’t reimburse me for anything IVE paid for#oh and I always have to give her gas money if I even simply just want to hang out because she’s always fucking broke somehow#and she works in healthcare like bitch I know what you make and you can’t play that you don’t have enough to get by or throw me 50 bucks#towards YOUR weed that I’m buying every once in a fucking while when I’m already paying for everything fucking else#I’m so angry and I know I’m being irrational and bitchy but this is what happens when you’re tripped off your meds cold turkey#and one of them is a mood stabilizer that makes it so you DONT feel this way about people and aren’t so bitter when you’re let down 🫠🫠🫠#because now my rejection sensitive dysphoria is going to be triggered even easier than usual and I’m just.#I actually fucking give up. I don’t even know what to do here. the pain going through my body is so fucking intense#I keep losing my train of thought because everything hurts and then every once in a while a DIFFERENT pain acts up and throws itself in too#I just. I just can’t fucking win.#I hate fucking struggling with my mental state like this when I’m off my meds.#and because I have to be a month without my stabilizer/pain management/birth control it’s going to take me ANOTHER month to get readjusted#to those in my body so I won’t feel normal again until nearly fucking mid to end January the earliest#and that’s fucking bullshit. I’m going to fucking **** myself by the time I get back on these fucking meds since it’ll take that long#fucking hell I just. I give up. I give in. I’m self isolating and cutting myself off from everyone because it’ll be in THEIR best interest#for me to do so when I can’t control my mind like this. I’m so tired of feeling so fucking shitty and I’ve only been off them for two days
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
finally back to lifting after a neck tumor removal surgery!!! possibly a bad move to start off this ambitious... but im feeling pretty cool to have done 10 unassisted pull-ups right off the bat! B) im a ways off of my past leg press weight but i'll work back up to it in time! (the bakery cant go out of business like this, i wont let her)
#my left arm feels d e a d though lmao#it straight up wont relax all the way#thats ok tho <3 she'll heal#god ive missed actually using muscles :')#'you cant lift more than 20 pounds for the next 2 weeks and no more than 40 for the next 6' ... WELL ITS BEEN 7 AND A HALF...#i did start to feel some pain at the surgery site :/ so i stopped and we'll try again later this week#but still!!!!!!!#glad to be back ive missed using my body#its been miserable just sitting on the internet and loafing for the last 2 months#and prior to that i couldnt workout for like 3 months before the surgery bc id feel the tumor pushing against my neck tendons lol#and exercise strained it#so all in all i havent worked out like this in 5? almost 6 months?#and i wasnt that consistent even before that#so its been a g e s since i really worked out my arms#so grateful to get to move my body again :')
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
things aren’t going well with peach. while i think my dad’s very right to be concerned that she hasn’t eaten anything in nearly 60 hours (obviously i am too), im becoming increasingly concerned that she hasn’t slept at all in around 36 hours and prior to that she was under anaesthetic, which isn’t exactly restful, so it’s closer to 48 hrs
like dad took her back to the vet today and we’ve got injections for her painkillers now because she’s not eating, and also injections for fluids (because she doesn’t drink; she only gets water from her food), so the not eating is Bad but also kinda under management, but if she doesn’t sleep soon i’m extremely worried. dad was like ‘if she doesn’t eat by tomorrow afternoon we’ll take her back because the injections will run out’ but like. if she doesn’t sleep tonight we have GOT to take her back first thing in the morning so they can sedate her or something
#her pain doesn’t seem to be too bad now that she’s got pain relief so idk what’s stopping her from sleeping#she won’t even lie down unless i’m sitting next to her. she just sits there staring out the window#her pupils are also taking up her entire eyes and have been all day#that’ll be a side effect of the medication and maybe the lack of sleep? but it won’t be making her feel any better#she can probably barely see at this point#like imagine you’ve been awake for 2 days after surgery and you’re in a lot of pain and haven’t eaten since before surgery#and are also on strong painkillers. and you also have no idea what’s wrong with you or why everyone’s doing things that hurt you#bruh your brain would be COOKED. there’s no way she has any idea what’s going on rn but she’s clearly feeling terrible#personal#like i think she’ll be ok in the long-term but she’s gotta somehow get through all these immediate issues#last time something like this happened she stopped drinking and never started again#not eating or sleeping don’t have workarounds as simple as putting water in her food#it really doesn’t help that there’s so much other shit going on rn#i’m doing a whole bunch of stuff with my phone and computer that’s taking a lot of work#but also my sister’s going on a long overseas trip that she’s leaving for tomorrow#so the combo of dad and sister coming and going constantly and also like 6 random deliveries for tech stuff in the last 2 days—#has the dogs really wound up. so georgie’s been howling at absolutely everything#and it’s rainy so my clothes aren’t trying and they’re hanging on a rack hooked on the hallway door so the door can’t close#which puts one less door between my room and the dogs so they’re waking me up every time anything happens#and i sleep during the day so that’s ALL THE TIME. i’ve had like 8 hrs of sleep between the last two afternoons#my sister always has so much random life stuff she wants to talk about and was getting really annoyed that i wasn’t very receptive#like ‘im about to go away for 3 months’ sorry i know its a big thing but i can’t just reschedule peach’s medical emergency
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
jon kent is so fucking funny. he sees a dictator and is like "is anyone gonna overthrow that?" and then just doesn't wait for answer
#this is so fucking funny#jon 2 hours into the injustice world: hmm maybe it's time to overthrow someone#he has to do it#like the same way babies need a nap every 3 hours#if jon kent doesn't overthrow a dictator every 6 months he will get cranky#if only jay was there. literally would've backed jon up immediately#jon: babe i think my dad here is a dictator#jay already prepping his laptop and costume: say no more. i'm ready#i didn't even have to guess what happens next#i saw the panel where jon figures out that everyone is scared and just#me taking off my glasses and pinching my nose bridge: he's gonna fuckin overthrow injustice supes isn't he?#the text in the corner: 'NEXT: REBELLION'#me sighing tiredly: jesus fucking christ jon. can't take you anywhere#jon kent#dc#aosjk
41 notes
·
View notes
Text
winter 2k24, huh~~~~~~ _(:3 」∠)_
#aaaaaa it’s coming out just a few days before the major compilation album huh……#amz.jp preorders have already started huh… man.#im gonna wait till the inevitable ani.mate preorders start… i want the (inevitable) bonus comic aaaaaaaaaaa#i hope the bonus will be relatively(?) wholesome… unlike what’s probably in the actual manga u m.#i wonder if there will be another delay between the physical release and the digital release though…#anyways place your bets what do you think the cover of vol 2 will look like?#im guessing it’d be a redraw of one of the other chorus stills from the mv#maybe the one where she’s putting on makeup? since the flashback arc’s in this volume and all?#or maybe the ‘serves you right lol’ from the chorus with her fists by her chin?#(the second guess is mainly bc i think the series is gonna be 3 vols long and so one chorus still for each vol cover checks out right~?)#highly unlikely though lmaoooo since there are tons of good stills to pick from… she’s too cute#bc idk i really dont see the series dragging out for longer than 3 vols. esp since the flashback arc is already here#like. the protag’s flashback arcs usually appear some time around the climax of the story right?#so with the flashback in vol 2 that leaves enough time for a proper resolution in vol 3.#here’s to hoping that the chizuchan manga is able to have a better ending that whatever nonsense we got from the [redacted] anime lmao#i d k i just want to see chizuchan vibing with her friends and some resolution with renren and concon in vol 3 is that too much to ask—#then again this is the same manga that had the events of ch 4 and the first 2/3 of ch 5 take place#so there’s really no telling what’ll happen next…#in any case!!!!!! i’m terrified for ch 6 region lock release at the end of the month!!!!!#but… 160 pages long… hmmmmmm. does that mean that ch 8 (at least) will be short? ch 5 alone takes up a little over 1/4 of the pages…#and ch 6 was released in 4 parts on li.ne manga (like ch5)… so that’s prolly a long one too…#at this rate i think vol 2’s gonna come out before ch 7’s individual release… but… aaa.#i think i have the chizuchan manga’s on the brain a little too much for my own good. i should start charging it rent up there#a n y w a y s kimikawaii mv surpassed lxl’s hallokiss mv in views yayyyyyyyyy keep it up nagisakun down with lxl!!!!!!#aight that’s all from me for now. i think. i hope. yup. byeeeee#chizuutan chizpost
2 notes
·
View notes