#so all in all i havent worked out like this in 5? almost 6 months?

[chaoxfix]

finally back to lifting after a neck tumor removal surgery!!! possibly a bad move to start off this ambitious... but im feeling pretty cool to have done 10 unassisted pull-ups right off the bat! B) im a ways off of my past leg press weight but i'll work back up to it in time! (the bakery cant go out of business like this, i wont let her)

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[lafgl]

whoah I’ve also been having spots in my vision. have u been to the optometrist for those spots in your eyes?? It’s none of my business truly, just wanted to suggest a trip bc it turns out its a serious enough symptom to warrant an immediate MRI. which turns out is like sitting inside the inside of a computer that is attacking you, sonically

yep i went when they first started when i had covid and they are apparently a Thing that coincidentally the one doctor in the US studying it works in my town. hes got patients coming to see him from like florida and california and i am in new england. he experienced it too and actually knew he had covid a second time before even having any symptoms or testing positive because he was driving and the spots started again. something about the chemical process being slowed somehow by covid/long covid. same theory behind your eyes being overstimulated when you stare at lights and then you see the flight of colors exactly where the lights were for a bit when you look away. they gave me a stat head ct because they thought i was having a stroke; i was not. i have had 5 rounds of eye tests and they are all So Normal. i had like 10+ spots all in the top half of my vision almost in a row for the first week and then they slowly disappeared down to 2 which are slightly above center in each eye, one straight ahead and one slightly to the left. i don’t really notice them day to day except when i close my eyes but i think ive just got used to them? im booked for a mri with contrast next week since they havent gone away. he says the longest a patient he sees has had them was 9 months so far and im going on 6!

[leclercenjoyer]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

helloooo i was tagged by my darlings @boxboxbrioche @vicsy and @golden-fairylights

1. How many works do you have on ao3

12 total, including 1 on anon! (anon because it is unfinished and so no one can hold me acountable)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 

36,202! im baby

3. What fandoms do you write for?

formula one babyyyyyy

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

something borrowed (265 kudos)

no poor substitute (261 kudos)

tip of the tongue (252 kudos)

treat with care (216 kudos)

helping hand (143 kudos)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i want to but i never know what to say 😭😭😭 somebody please help me.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

probably muscle memory, i think thats the only one ive written that doesnt have a happy or hopeful ending

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

almost all of them are happy ending but i think anything, everything might be the most explicitly happy ending?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

i havent thus far but this may change

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

i do!! most of what i write is in the realm of what i would call "tenderhorny" because thats what i enjoy writing, porn with feelings. thats the most fun thing to write for me.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

i havent!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of 😭

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

not yet!!! if anyone... wants to... hit me up...

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

NO BUT I WANT TO SO BAD im planning a very special fic with a dear friend, for when i am freed of my school obligations... and possibly another with another dear friend... i wanna play in the sandbox with people...

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

i am a pierresteban girlie through and through. they gripped me by the throat when i was less than two months in and they havent let go

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

well. my unfinished anon wip sdjhkjsd but there are... so many wips in my folders that ive started and abandoned that i doubt will ever see the light of day.

16. What are your writing strengths?

ive been told my writing feels very grounded and in-body, and im very deliberate with my word choices when im trying to create a mood

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

once again being deliberate with my word choice means i agonize over the smallest sentences 😭 and i have "say as much as possible in as few words as possible" disease so i often struggle to like. Elaborate. and i am the slowest writer on this planet i think.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

if the POV character doesn't understand what is being said, keep it in the language its said in. if the POV character understands what is being said, just say "blah blah blah," he says in [language]. thats my hot take. i dont know if its particularly hot. is this even what is being asked? i have holes in my brain.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

ive written assorted snippets for many but f1 is the first fandom where ive written and actually finished and published fic.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

its a tie between muscle memory and something borrowed, the former because it took me forever and im so proud to have finished it and how it came out, and the latter because it was my first fic and my baby and i could not have dreamed of the reception it got, its so special to me and everyone was so kind to me and made me believe i could actually Do This

i dont know who all has done it already 😭 if you see this and you want to do it consider yourself tagged

[ratheread]

My opinion on each kotlc book.

These are my personal opinions on each book so yeah if you dont agree cool I really don't care. I'm working on rereading the series so i show a better opinion on the books i havent read for awhile. Tw: Spoilers.

•Book one- Kotlc

Its good it's the most page time Dex has, but couldn't the black swan leave a note or something being like hey we're not the bad guys. Also why did forkle leave Sophie and Dex alone with no way to get back to the Lost Cities. I feel bad for sophie too because in this book fitz comes in and is like "Yeahhh.... so your an elf and can't live with humans. Oh also you know all the stuff the humans taught you... yeah it's wrong."

•Book 2- Exile

Again another good one except dex doesn't have nearly enough page time. Silveny is the best animal in the series I also think this is the first book that Iggy gets a makeover. Also Keefe getting more page time I love, the sokeefe moments. And of course the neverseen makes an appearance. And Sophie almost being killed by limbium. And brant being a psycho. And Sophie seeing her wanderling.

•Book 3- Everblaze

The saddest so far with the best councilor being killed. But he was trying to protect Sophie and Alden and fitz. Oh yeah and Alden's mind being broken and fitz being a bitch and lashing out at everyone. Rip Kenric

•Book 4- Neverseen

This book contains a bunch of sofitz. This when I was battling shipping sokeefe and sofitz which lasted until book 8. Loved calla and rip her

•Book 5- Lodestar

Took me the longest because of Keefe joining the neverseen. Poor Sophie. And Keefe being dumb was mainly in this.

•Book 6- nightfall

YAY SOPHIES PARENTS ARE ALIVE. This is the most page time Amy's gotten. It's not bad but yeah.

Book 7- flashback

Sofitz gets together kinda annoying but I had hight expectations for this ship but it kinda sunk quickly. They about kiss then sliveny goes into labor (Ty silveny for breaking that kiss before it could happen) The vackers get exposed. And Sophie and fitz get stuck in the healing center for a month and sokeefe moments are the best. BUT SOPHIE BEING UNMATCHABLE

Book 8- legacy

This is my favorite book so far (Tho 8.5 is close) SOFITZ BREAKS UP. Poor Sophie having to deal with Fitz temper. Glad they did. Sofitz was doomed from the start. And poor Keefe omg I shed the most tears over this book. And poor Keefe and his toxic mom being the mf she is. But the sokeefe is cute. Even though Sophie is unmatchable FITZ WASNT THERE he offered to help her find her parents. Also I'm not that surprised that orlie isn't Sophie's mom. I've suspected for awhile.

Book 8.5- Unlocked

I like the background we get for the characters. Keefes stuff is the best. It's also the most page time Dex has gotten in while. I like how in novella we get Sophie and keefes perspective. It made if more enjoyable. Keefes file is just hilarious. The art was gorgeous and I loved how some ot the pages looked like actual writing.

Book 9- Stellarlune

Alright this book was good arguable better then 8.5 and 8. I loved the kiss in chapter 42 and jealous fitz was great. I didn't like everyone's attitude at all. (I wrote an entire post on that) but ro got a bunch of page time and so did dex so that was great. Kenric gets the most page time he's had ever. (Not him being mentioned) and same with Oralie. I don't understand why Sophie hates her so much she does have some valid points but not many. I had such expectations for the kiss and it met them perfectly. Overall fitz handled things pretty well so yeah. Keefe and Sophie flirting yes please. OMFG THE CLIFFHANGER. I can't wait to see what happens 10.

[sneakyspades]

ok yknow what im just gonna straight up vent about work rn bc i ran out of tags on the other post

its become such a fucking shitshow down there jesus christ i cannot fucking stand it anymore. communication doesnt exist, i dont even remember the last time back of house had a fucking meeting. the owner pushed for us to stay open during a blizzard where it was a wind chill of -40. i mean holy fuck, the city said dont travel unless its an emergency

i had issues on sunday that i wasnt sure about, but our chef was out of town doing a show with his band, and our sous chef was sitting at the bar in the restaurant a good 5 or 6 beers deep by the time i ran into this problem. i asked the other supervisor (who agrees with me that this is a shitshow) and he wasnt sure either so we straight up guessed

i only make 15 an hour despite having been there for a whole fucking year, because i only get supervisor pay when im clocked in as supervisor. which is a measly 8 of my 40 hours. but god forbid i dont act like a supervisor for all 40 hours

insurance is unsustainably expensive there. my coworker who makes 13.50 an hour takes home *more than i do per paycheck* at this point. and he works 32 hours! i havent taken home more than 750 a pay check since getting insurance! i used to be grossing 1000! IM LITERALLY PAYING 175 DOLLARS EVERY PAY CHECK! AND THATS ABOUT TO GO UP TO ALMOST 180 WHEN I TURN 27! im not making any fucking money! im not getting any savings!

not to mention they fucked up my insurance not that long ago! i was told at the doctors office and the pharmacy that i had zero coverage! but they were still taking money from my fucking paycheck for it! like holy fuck i shouldve talked to goddamn lawyer about that instead of giving them the benefit of the doubt!

i was 110% fine with making 15 an hour and doing nothing but pizzas. because the trade off was that i could cut out early, i could trade shifts, if i got sick it wasnt fucking everyone else over. but now i cant do any of that. i have to close on saturdays, dont get home and in bed until 1:30 some nights, and then have to get up and go do a 10 hour shift every sunday. every weekend! every fucking weekend! and im the only one that does that anymore! im not the only one doing a double on sunday, but im the only one who has to close the night before. and because im just exhausted by the end of a sunday, my mondays are practically wasted because im catching up on sleep!

i like. cant fucking do this anymore. i cant think of any reason why im still there. i could go worl at fucking sams club in the bakery, start at the same wage (if not more), have *less* responsibilities, be doing something i want to do, and they close at 8 every day. i dont think theyre even open on sundays!

why am i still working there? its not sustainable for me anymore. my body is fucked. its falling apart ahead of schedule. i cant even open my door in the morning because of carpal tunnel. im 26 and when i crouch down i cant always get back up. the other night my ankle just started popping every time i turned around. what am i doing? what am i doing. i dont know.

i dont even have energy left over to draw. or make stained glass. or even do a discord call. the last time i had an actual date with my partner was, what, like 4 fucking months ago? i dont have any energy left over. im using it all for a place that i dont enjoy working at anymore, and i know i wont get better hours. our sous chef has been here since the place opened and he only has night shifts. the only day he doesnt is sunday. which is 8am to 3pm.

our new hire has sunday-monday off. why cant i have that? i want a weekend day off. its not gonna happen in this industry. its not gonna happen in this kitchen. i cant do this for the next however many years,

[diaryofageminivenus]

Rating the signs (sex wise)

i haven’t had sex with all 12 signs, but i have had sex with a few of them so let’s take a look at the signs.

ARIES - havent had sex with one as of yet

TAURUS - 5/10, he was good at the moment. i was clouded by my hormones & ovulation that i didn’t realize he was a complete weirdo. im mad that he gave me BV, he was uncircumcised as well. (bling)

GEMINI 1 - 6/10, his dick was huge. i just hate car sex, i do wish that i got to fully experience him. (bowler)

GEMINI 2 - 6.9/10, i wish we did more positions. his dick was girthy which was amazing, it probably would’ve been amazing if we actually took the time to have sex instead of just trying to smoke. he was a cool ass person to be around tho. (story coming soon)

CANCER - 8/10, his dick was so pretty. he was an eater, and i loved him so much. although his dick was average he knew exactly how to work it. he was almost my first nut, but he always came before i could. he took the time to actually experiment and learn the things i like. he actually cared for me and wanted to always make sure i was good. (bonnet)

LEO - haven’t had sex with one as of yet.

VIRGO - give it a month maybe and i’ll have sex with one.

LIBRA - 1/10, small dick. he did make me extremely wet, i will not explain further. i will MAYBE write a story on him.

SCORPIO - 3/10, lost my virginity to him but nothing about the experience was truly memorable. the dick was subpar but that head? omg i almost melted out of my body that’s how good the head was. (stoner)

SAGITTARIUS - 9/10, he took his time with me, this man is up there with the biggest dicks ever. he took care of me, i couldn’t nut from his dick because it was too big for me to really just be comfortable, but he was amazing. i did nut from his head. i miss him at times, but i think that door is closed especially after the terms we left off. (swimmer)

CAPRICORN - havent fucked one yet, might not actually idk.

AQUARIUS 1- 6/10, he was a little musty, and he was quite rough with me. other than that he was a good lay. he wanted to fuck again but i just couldn’t bring myself to do it again, i feel pretty bad about it but thats in the past now.

AQUARIUS 2- 4/10, his dick was big but why did i even fuck him for real? he wasn’t bad at sex but it was just boring, like i really gained a body for us to just do missionary, backshots, and the occasional ride. he also acted pretty hollywood which was weird to me (bimbo)

PISCES - 9.6/10, save a horse ride a cowboy amiright???? lmaooo, but this man made me cum 4 times in one night. who knew a one night stand would be my best body, i want to go back and experience him again. he wasn’t even the biggest dick ever, it was just his aura that made me comfortable around him. (cowboy)

if this list puts anything into perspective, it’s that I attract water and air signs a lot. i mainly attract air signs, maybe it’s because of my venus. i would definitely recommend water signs for head.

[gorewh0re90x-blog]

diary entries...

TW: substances, ed, TMI situations

1/7/2024

6pm

im so tired. i havent been this tired since i quit doing dope 7 months ago. i still miss her almost everyday. my one true love. she was with me through everything the last 12 years. our relationship was toxic as hell but she will always be the one who got away. even if (when) i relapse and run back to her it will always end. it might end in death or just another rehab but it will always end. thats the thing with her, no matter how many times i run back i always have to leave, even if its for a little bit. theres no way around it. i start doing good in life and i run back to her warm and beautiful arms. the beginning is always the best, the honeymoon phase, but it doesnt last longer than 6 months. she always asks for more and more. more time, more money, more attention, more destruction. we lay in bed all day and all night as she whispers sweetly in my ear 'you dont need any of this..not this job, not this money, not your friends, not your family, not the outside world..you only need me..' and i always agree because its true, i only need her to be ok with being alive. no matter how many times we go through the same notions, i always listen to her..how can i not? when im with her nothing else matters, nothing means a thing. she makes me feel so safe, so warm, so invincible, so beautiful, so amazing.. its only her, always and forever.. until she takes everything away from me, as she always does, and drags me to rock bottom where the only choice i have left, is to leave her again..

9pm

idk whats wrong with me the last few days. im so tired and feeling like crap. it cant be not enough sleep because im sleeping. it cant be not enough food because im eating. im tired, my stomach hurts, im cold until I get in bed and under the covers and then im hot. my head hurts. my body aches, although that could be just me trying to work out too much. it feels like im constipated but im still going a little everyday. consistency of soft serve ice cream, which is super foreign to me. ive been constipated for the last 12 years, going once a week, if i was lucky, and when i did go it was like pushing out baseballs made out of rocks. this whole thing is just strange and exhausting. i just feel like I have the flu. i took dulcolax, my savior, an hour and a half ago and im hoping it clears out everything i ate the last 4 days and not just little swirls of crap that take 10mins of wiping to clean up. gross, i know. i just want to sleep but i don't want to wake up at midnight and be wide awake til i get back from the clinic at 6:30am. maybe ill be able to sleep for the next 6 hours and then just work out some until its time to head to the clinic at 5:30. i took an hour nap earlier around 5pm and had a weird dream.. it had to do with 2 guys breaking in and trying to shoot us unsuccessfully and ended up with me stabbing one and the other getting shot. hopefully its not some premission.. im gonna try to nap.

1/8/2024

12:05am

i decided to let myself get an oreo mcflurry every sunday since ive been doing so well with my diet and exercise. i figured that since i burn more than the 510cal thats in the dam thing every day anyway, i can be a fat fucking pig and have one. theyre just so dam good 😩 cutting out all sugar has been a nightmare over the last month. ive spent the whole time i was an h addict living on sugar so its been rough. it will be totally worth it though. i should reach my current goal weight of 100lbs in the next 10 months or less as long as i keep doing what ive been doing. i cant wait to be thin and beautiful. i dont need drugs as long as im thin 🖤

1/9/2024

1am

i ate that slice of cheese pizza i said i wouldnt touch..378cals. 378!! im such a fat pig. disgusting. it doesnt matter that i burned twice as much in calories today. the only thing that matters is that i didn't have enough self control to not eat that dam slice of pizza. i hate that my husband eats the foods i cant have every freaking day. i know me needing to lose weight is not his problem but it still sucks to be put in these situations everyday. if its not pizza its cookies and sweets and danishes and everything else I cant eat. fuck this sucks so bad! starting tomorrow i need to burn more than 700-900cals each day. i need to walk more than 10-13k steps. i need to eat less than 1400cal each day. idc if im technically still losing weight. its not enough. i need to do better and damnit i will do better.

11pm

i ate less but didnt get to work out as much as i wanted to. i guess tomorrow will be better. it better be at least. i need to get to sleep before 3am tonight so i dont sleep til 5pm tomorrow.. i have to be up at 530am to go to the clinic 5 times a week and by 11am im so exhausted i need a freaking nap or im falling over on my feet. i think they need to lower the dose on my medicine. this is getting super annoying. i just wanna be thin already. fml.

1/11/2024

12:36am

today was good. i walked over 13k steps, worked out for an hour, burned about 1000cals and only ate about 800cals. definitely getting a hang of this. didnt have a headache either. got a decent amount of sleep too. im definitely gonna ask my clinic to lower the dose on my medication because im sure thats why im tired all the time. im super sore from the gym the other day but tomorrow i have to go either way. hopefully it wont be too crowded because i get really bad anxiety and paranoia around strangers. i hate going outside. goodnight my lovelies, i hope youre all staying on track and getting closer to your ugw 🖤🚬🦋

1/13/2024

5:16am

i had a good day yesterday but not a great night. i burned around 1200cals and had a 90min work out plus 15k steps. less food as well. ordered some stuff off amazon ive been wanting since beginning of december so i was super happy until my husband decided to drink and be..not great. he hasnt been drinking since we moved states 7 months ago except 1 or 2 previous occasions because he gets wasted and acts a fool. he was doing good until he wasnt. it just wasnt a good experience but hes finally asleep. im exhausted from not getting more than 3 hours of sleep the previous night and having to deep clean the whole house and do my workout and now being up all night. i want to go to sleep but i have a few things to worry about due to his drinking so its not looking so good right now.. i fed the stray cats i take care of just now and im gonna lay down and listen to some creepypastas and hope for sleep to come. hope everyone is doing well 🖤🚬🦋

[blackvail22]

9/22/23 — 1:20am

i hate wanting to be productive in the middle of the night. i was tired all day tdy, and now i just want to do something productive. no!!! i work earlier than usual tomorrow!!!!

im doing my skincare now... i wore makeup tdy so i have no choice but to do it 🤯

im tired still but i dont want to sleep. i feel like i havent been productive enough tdy even though i went to 3 different appointments and within the 2 hours before work i cleaned my bathroom sink (that was incredibly disgusting, i am not exaggerating. no one has cleaned it in like a little over a year. my dad shaves his face there whenever it gets like 5 inches long and doesnt clean the hair out of the sink/on the counter. its gross.), made ramen (it wasnt v good).... at work i walked around almost the whole 6 hours. my feet hurt so!! bad!! after i work. it happens every time. it doesnt help that when i fell down my stairs, my "sprained" foot didnt heal properly. i also hurt my hand at work and have not seen a doctor .... im ngl im like a mess and if i tell anyone abt this theyll tell me its because im fat and need to lose weight WE GET IT. I KNOW. IM TRYING, AND JUST BECAUSE I AM DOESNT MEAN THAT I CANT HAVE SMTH WRONG WITH ME?????

anyways

im tired. like mentally and physically. i had counseling tdy and i told her everything and the time still wasnt full. she shared some things abt her life recently... still didnt fill the time. she didnt respond much at all, but she's grieving, so i understand

im not telling anyone except u and my digital diary about my situation with my ex... i need to stop complaining to people abt him and making it everyones problem when its really my fault i keep letting him back in my life. its bad! ive literally had dreams where he did that *thing* but like in an extremely worse way, and i told myself that i just had to live with it, that i have to get used to it. and, i mean, i guess i do... if i can *** ***** then he can do whatever.

im not even with him... just flirting heavily. he picks up on it, i think so, anyway....

im tired

i saw that u updated ur music playlist you sent to me recently ! so heres a song for u in return

2:51am

idk why it pisses me off so bad but when b says shes ugly it makes me so angry. "why cant i be like the pretty girls?" she is the definition of a pretty girl... she may not see it because people were mean to her growing up but its like... ive cried SO much because of how pretty she is. my parents call her the pretty girl, people at school say shes pretty all the time... it just makes me so upset that someone as pretty as her cant see it. and i wish she could, honestly.

and i hate that this makes me so angry. i have so much envy that it rips me apart every second of the day, and i hate it!!!!! im the fat, ugly friend, and i always felt bad for her being friends with me. she says that im one of the prettiest ppl she knows.... if that were true, would she have deleted all the photos of me off of her phone? who knows. and the fact that people compliment her all the time at school and in public should say A LOT about how pretty she is. it happens all the time! and i mean all the time. maybe she doesnt think it was genuine or she forgets? idk... i think the last time a stranger complimented my appearance was a year and a half ago at a taco bell drive thru. the last time i was called pretty (besides when my mom says it) was at leastt 6 months ago. im like distraught because she is literally so beautiful fuck

this is going to make me cry myself to sleep because i cant say any of this to her because this is really just unhealthy of me, like the envy and making me seem like the victim. it just makes me so upset that everyone thinks shes pretty but herself

yeah im def crying myself to sleep gn i work in 11hrs which sounds like a long time from now but i havent slept yet lol

3:16am

ok i lied i messaged her and said "i saw you commented "i wish i was one of the pretty girls" on a tiktok, and i really need you to know that you are the pretty girl. youre so incredibly beautiful not only on the outside but the inside too... it can be rare to find someone like that. i hope youre able to see yourself through my eyes someday and see yourself for what you truly are—beautiful"

i hope it doesnt come off weird

ok i cried and messaged her i should rlly just sleep now

[ferrn0]

REGARDING POSTING

heads up / TW: this looks at personal stuff + vent(? sorta) ALSO this is not super important / not essential for you to read

TL;DR:

less posting due to massive lack of motivation

want to post more and take art serious but its hard

could be depression or hormones idk dont know what to do

overthinking lots -> dont know why this is happening

crave regular change but havent had it + difficult to get change bc of parents -> maybe this is why??

going to try my best not to stress abt it

do not worry about me, im going to be okay

i havent been posting much proper/ finished/ full art ( not sketches ) because ive been really struggling with motivation this year. For all i know, it could be a depression(?) thing or perhaps hormones ( i have a uterus unfortunately) or maybe it just comes down to ADHD.. i do take medication for adhd but they dont really do much regarding dopamine so my motivation is still kinda low even when i take the meds. I really want to be posting proper art and i want to take my art more seriously however, without motivation its really difficult. Im finding myslef slipping back into what feels like a depressive mindset. kind of. yet, im super happy in so many aspects of my life where i used to be affected by this mindset. I have found a better group of people to be around ive found more things i want to do and ive got goals for the year- i didnt have those this time last year. And now.. my creativity has been affected and i dont know what to do.

-

I feel guilty for not posting. Or maybe i feel frustrated that i dont post (which leaves me with noone seeing my work). Either way, i want to post. but i cant get myself to.

this leaves me thinking...

"maybe i just need to improve my skills"

"maybe im not putting enpugh effort in, what if im just not 'trust(ing) the process' enough"

"i might need to just try a new medium"

"maybe i need a new intrest or fandom to join so i can make fanart"

"what if i was just qrong my whole life and im not cut out to be an artist?"

"perhaps theres something else wrong with me and thats why i cant get myself to do things"

And this circles round and round. So what do i do about it?? should i just take a break and not focus on posting? but i already do that anyway! do i just try to do a month long or a week long challenge? but i always miss days and eventually give up!

The more i write about this the more i realise i am not okay. and that im getting worked up over a small thing. but i am miniscule and to me this small thing is ginormous.

-

i am a kind of person who craves change. but only when i want it. And i have gone a very long time without the kind of change i need in my immediate environment. so maybe thats the issue. but i happen to be a child. who lives with his parents. so that causes some problems, dont it? not that my parents are horrible people or incredibly unfair. but because they have their own ideas of how we (me and my brothers) should grow up and what sort of privileges we get ect. because they are my parents. My parents believe that we should each have atleast one physical out-of-school activity we do each week. I do basketball. and i have been since i was in grade 5. its been almost 5 years. dont get me wrong, i love the game and i love playing it. but i find myself dreading going to each game everyweek. i need change. i want to quit bball. i also do drama classes each week(since yr 6/7)- but i like that. and i dont want to quit. because its different every week, every year. My bedroom has also been that same for the past 3 or so years, yes i have moved things around, but the furniture hasnt changed, and the walls have been the same colour with the same wall stickers since we moved in when i was in year 1. I spend a lot of time in here(my room) and it doesnt feel like mine anymore.

-

TW- eating

my medication for ADHD gives me a smaller to no appetite during the day. I no longer bring much or anything to school to eat. i dont really eat breakfast either(but i did that before i got meds anyway). I still eat dinner everyday, just a little less that i used to. and i will eat lunch (depending on situation) during the holidays and weekends mostly because it ends up getting made dor me half the time. i do suspect the rather sudden change un my eating habbits might be affecting me. but nothing terrible has happened to me yet(i have lost a few kgs but that isnt worrying as i was a little overweight beforehand). perhaps this is affecting my motivation too. but who i am to know for sure?.

END OF TW

-

i think i will just continue as i have been. but i will try my best to not worry myself over not posting. although i cannot make any garantees. not many people follow or interact with me here so i doubt this will cause too many concerns but if it does, please do not worry. i will be okay. i am working on myself.

I apologise to those who want/wanted to see my work more/more often. i hope this all makes sense and that you can understand ♡

with sillies,

thomas[FERRN0]

[greeneyesfriedrice]

check-in tag!

thank you. @bitnotgood28 for the tag i appreciate it <33

1) why did you choose your url ?

i thought it was clever tbh

2) any side-blogs ? if you have them, name them and why you have them

nope i have no idea how they work

3) how long have you been on tumblr ?

well i’ve had this account for a while but i didn’t start actually being active until probably three to four weeks ago?

4) do you have a queue tag ?

i... do not

 5) why did you start your blog in the first place

i was banned on twitter so i finally figured out how this stupid but lovely app works <3

6) why did you choose your icon/pfp ?

pride month!! rainbow!!!

7) why did you choose your header ?

again, pride month. and larry because they are my loves

8) what’s your post with the most notes ?

this one comparing the umbro shirt to the blue bandana <3

9) how many mutuals do you have ?

um i’m not sure

10) how many followers do you have ?

umm i think almost 80 and idk why they follow me but they do and i love them

11) how many people do you follow ?

247

12) have you ever made a shitpost ?

ummm no? idk osjdidhd

13) how often do you use tumblr each day ?

probably too much

14) did you have a fight/argument with another blog once ? who won ?

i havent i’m afraid of confrontation :)

15) how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts ?

i’ll reblog it if i feel like it

16) do you like tag games ?

yes i love being tagged in things pls do it more

17) do you like ask games ?

yeah

18) which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous ?

all of them seem tumblr famous to me lmao

19) do you have a crush on a mutual ?

not romantically but if anyone would like to be friends i’m down

20) tags ?

um um @exzouis @whaleharry @quickpauseinconversations @thehornoftheunicorn @halosanchor (sorry if you’ve done it already no pressure!!)

[artreider]

Let's try to get this final live blog on my station 19 rewatch done. I'm currently laid up on my couch in mild pain but unable to do anything else.

I don't really like flashback episodes but i want one for the premiere since we are jumping so far ahead. I hate that this episode starts with a fight. But damn knowing what the fight is over, i love how loyal andy is to maya in this episode. Something ive wanted for her and the team. Qnd also jaina looks gorgeous.

The fire scene yay another fire on the fire show lmao. Feel like we missed some last year which im sure was covid related.

The marina scene ugh chefs kiss. I love how happy and giddy they are. I do wish we couldve gotten to see some of their month apart communication and their quarantining apart those two weeks when carina got back. I wrote a little something related to that and i may share before the premiere of season 5.

The quiet moment between carina saying her morning was better than those 6 weeks and then asking about mayas folks was a beautiful and real moment and i love it. So brief it could be overlooked but great choice for team.

The little bit of danielle and stefania that was them and adlibbed in this episode was so great also.

I love that rhey addressed how everyone was able to attend maskless and how safe the wedding was keeping the real world element in. Also vic love you and your chicken dance comment makes me sad that we didnt get it.

Vics parents trying to talk to her about theo is so cute.

Poor lawyer she'd be good for dean.

I understand some people dont come out until late in life but that is hard to hear that you havent loved the person youve been with for decades like you do this new person. That would hurt me so much to hear, like i couldve been with someone who is my great love if youd told me sooner. I love/hate this storyline for travis family.

Ugh if this fire had gone on any longer those poor kids and elderly couple.

Haha andy you should wait until someone answers the door for you when visiting almost newlyweds or people who've been seperated for 6 weeks lmao.

Also maya's excuse and none wet (shower) sex hair i love it.

Ugh sullivan trying to defend himself makes me so upset.

Bailey giving ben hell about second and third opinions is funny, like i figure shed be all for it.

Inara and marcus leaving jack is sad. I hope we still get to see marsha in season 5. Also if they do pair jack and jo itd be a bit ironic. I mean jo too had an abusive ex like inara.

Also jack and his marsha have similar eyes, itd be something if it came out she really was his mom.

I dont understand how maya hadnt settled on what to wear she's queen of the clipboard lmao. Just goes to show how some things throw us off course. Also i totally get her saying her outfit choice will define her forever. I judge my look in my wedding photos all the time and feel like other people do as well.

Why do i feel like this exchange between maya and carina was mostly adlibbed? It just feels so fun.

This poor family and ugh i couldnt imagine having to make the tough calls of firefighters/fire captains.

Love that all the fire crew helped put the wedding on.

I understand travis emotion here.

How'd this conversation about maya's folks get started with andy???

I love that maya and andy's friendship is restored. Also famous last words maya, dont speak the bad juju into existence.

Dean you shouldve spoken up there.

Why the chief there? I live in a city and the chief aint showing up for a house call that needs a few units. At least not until fire is out of they for some reason cant get it out.

Lmao maya freaking out about wearing the same thing as carina. Andy therapizing maya is funny.

That poor boy.

The dad comments to ben are beautiful. Also love that so many of the team know how dean feels about vic.

So why is travis getting dressed separately than the rest of his team. I mean i know its because he doesnt know about Dean's feelings and pushes vic to give theo a chance as well as allow theo and travis to talk but come on. He wouldnt get ready separately.

Also what was the point of theo going to that room if not to get ready. Sorry just annoying.

I wish carina had had someone mention andrew to her. Whether ben, bailey, maya or even any of the fire team who worked on the call with him during the crossover awhile back. Her grief during this day of happiness should've been acknowledged, even with just a remembrance table for him amd other family she lost to covid.

I do love this beautiful moment with vic though saying this isnt all just for maya.

Oh my how i love the maya confronting her father. She is the brave i want to be. Also what she says to her mom, yes chefs kiss. However when her mom shows up at the wedding, really the woman couldnt grab a nice shirt or dress to wear on her way out or on her way to the wedding.

I also love the look of pride on maya's moms face both at the house and the wedding.

Im sad we probably wont get any moments of her living with marina due to the time jump.

Ugh the choice that cost maya her promotion but ahouldnt have.

Also with all maya's options for clothes, couldnt they had dressed her mama in something borrowed from maya. Lol im sorry it bothers me so.

Vic's song for the intro is beautiful. Barrett has a beautiful voice.

Maya is so happy her mom is there and i love it. Also in my head at least one person videoing is doing it for the greys family who couldnt make it to the wedding for carina.

I also love maya singing along with vic to carina.

Queen of the clipboard forgetting to write her vows is special and funny. I love carina talking her down from a panic attack. Also her simple vow is beautiful and how carina who probably did write her vows saying we're good instead of reading them after seeing maya's mom in attendance and the look shared is everything.

I truly believe that was the moment she 100% knew maya had changed from end of season 3, was definitely all the way in. She knew what it meant for maya's mom to be there.

Love the dance montage and improved marina kiss.

Another healing theo and travis talk.

Sullivan just cant let it go and ugh trying to justify it. I just cant, still not over it. Even if he isnt captain in season 5 it still isnt right.

Sullivan you cant say you have the teams back then saying you can control them and throwing maya under the bus. Those are contradictory.

This jack and andy conversation is interesting.

This marina conversation is funny but sad when you know the end of the episode.

Its so funny that so few people know about Miller's feelings at this point.

It'll be interesting to see the travis, vic and theo in season 5.

Ben and bailey are so cute.

Wish we couldve had conversations at the wedding with maya and her mom or carina and maya's mom or the 3 of them.

Inara is so wise. I hate this for all 4 of them.

Gotta love the ole grab em and pull em back to kiss them and let them know how you really feel tremmett moment.

Too late dean, they tried to tell you.

I love marina dancing in the background ugh sullivan and the surrera rehashing.

Time for the horrible news ugh.

Everyone just looking at marina and knowing is horrible.

Great season, great episode and im looking forward to whats next.

Thank you to everyone thats been following my rewatch blogging, and for all the kind comments. I appreciate it so much, made the summer so fun.

[movedtovervainbrokemyheart]

general roleplay style and preferences.

rules: repost, don’t reblog. bold what applies, strikethrough what does not, italicize what only applies sometimes. elaborate on any points you'd like with a *.

credit.

types of roleplay / how i do threads

i don't | i just do whatever is on my dash when i'm online | mainly asks | i do little short things mostly | i do my threads on discord | long running threads that slowly build upon the muses.

plotting preferences

wing it | get a general idea ooc and then run with it and plot further if need be | long expansive thought out story arcs.

type of threads i do / prefer

one-liners only | whatever dash shenanigans i'm online for | para or mulit para | literal novels.

reply speed for threads, consistency and keeping threads.

i lose threads all the time and don't usually get back to them | i tend to lose threads but please tell me if i have and i'll reply | i drop threads pretty easily | i'm really slow but i will get back to you | i reply on a schedule / queue ( specify if you'd like ) | i usually reply within a week | i reply every day | i reply almost instantly.

romantic or sexual ships

i don't do these ships ( specify reason if you would like ) | i'm not against them happening but it is not the main point of my blog | ships will have to be super slow burn and discussed a lot ooc, super chemistry based ( specify reason if you'd like ) | i love doing ships, hmu i probably already ship it just ask | i ship really quickly | i autoship or ship within a few interactions | i mainly rp for the cute ship fluff or angst, smut.

smut

i do not do smut at all ( specify reason if you'd like ) | i'm very selective about it | i only do it on a separate ( blog / discord / specify here ) | i mainly only do asks relating to nsfw headcanons on sundays | i write it a medium amount | i write it all the time and love to | i am comfortable with foreplay and fade-to-blacks but nothing further.

active hours

mornings 8-10 | midday 11-1 | afternoon 2-5 | evenings 6-8 | night 9-12 | ungodly hours of the day 1-onwards.

activity schedule

super slow and sporadic, like once a month or so | slow and sporadic week long gaps between activity | bi-weeklyish activity | weekly activity | daily activity | i'm online nearly all the time.

starters

i don't do starter calls | i want to do starter calls but often don't have time | i do selective calls | i don't do calls, but always feel free to ask me for one ! | i do starter calls rarely / regularly / often. ( if ur seeing this and liked for a starter. u havent been forgotten. they are coming just like...uh winter or whatever the saying from that show is)

aus

i don't do aus | my blog is an au but outside of that i don't do them | i sometimes do them but only with a lot of plotting | i have a couple of aus already feel free to request them ! | i have aus coming out of my ears please interact with them ! | i love making aus hmu to plot if you think of one | there are some aus i won't do.

crossovers

i don't do crossovers | i'm selective with crossovers | i love crossovers ! ( IF i dont know a fandom, we are gonna have to chat or smth, or you can link me to a wiki page or even a random recap or something. I will make it work. )

tagged by: @arakkhna said anyone and since i am in fact a sentient vampire repellant?? i count fun fact i keep spelling ur url wrong and then being big shocked when it doesnt come up. am i the drama? i dont think im the draaaamaa

tagging: anyone

[kumoriyami-xiuzhen]

Hakuoki Yuugiroku Drama - Thumb-Sized Samurai Tracks 1-4 (of 7)

This is my last post of the month, so I’ll end by asking you to please support me if you can through my ko-fi, and paypal or patreon which provides access to my hakuoki blog translations and early access to my postings. Also, please let me know if you have any hakuoki drama cds that you’d be willing to share that are on my Lookout List since i either do not have audio for those cds or do not have audio that I can share.... and if you are able to remove watermarks from a video, please contact me.  

Well... I’m finally done with all that i can translate for this drama. posting these tracks all together since im unable to continue translating the rest of this by myself... which is something i wouldn’t normally do because i prefer splitting tracks up for more items on my queue, tho that’s also a side-effect of me usually not being able to stay focused on one drama... not sure when i’ll get to the subtitle videos for these since im still pretty busy (while i have the first 3 tracks of this drama subtitled [unedited], at this rate, i might just wait for when finals are done and just focus on all my videos in bulk then... plus ive yet to receive the tl for track 6 and 7 [and need someone else to go over where the voices overlap in track 5], so that will likely cause further delays to the videos for this drama).

also i totally caved in and exchanged points for the yuukoku no moriarty stage play file with chinese subs that someone finished translating recently and bought the blu-ray for the 2nd musical. havent craved more content from a fandom this badly since about a few months before i decided that i would start translating hakuoki stuff lol. 

Hakuoki Yuugiroku 2 Limited Edition Bonus Drama CD “Thumb-sized Samurai”

Translation by KumoriYami

Track 1

Kazama: hehehe~ Sure enough/As expected, this medicine's blend of Forsythia grass and boiled eel, along with my yearning and passion....

Heh.....hehehahaha~!!! Success at last! This forbidden drug, it shall be named ——the New Ishida Sanyaku · Changed/Improved!!

Hm~. as long as this strange drug  "the New Ishida Sanyaku" is improved, it will become a panacea that will make people fall deeply in love.......

She obviously loves me, [however] my wife is is unable to honestly admit to her feelings [and] is tormented by the pain of love-sickness/My wife, tortured by love sickness, has refused to admit her feelings, isn't this medicine suitable for her?

Alright/Well, now that this medicine has been completed, this must be quickly brought to my wife to drink.

No, wait, just in case, the effects of this must be tested first. (Kazama begins walking off somewhere—)

Track 2

Harada: So that's it/all, Hijikata-san, that's all I can report on. Sure enough/As expected, the team members' most pressing concern is the security of headquarters.

Saito: My opinions/suggestions are almost the same/similar/the same as Sano's. I believe that we need to improve our defences against intruders.

Hijikata: Is that so. I understand what you guys are saying. Harada and Saito, you've worked hard....... That being said, it's difficult to completely prevent intruders from coming in. This place is a temple, not a fortress. Even if we installed a fence now, that isn't really a good plan.

Saito:.....So what you're saying is......

Harada: But, shouldn't the area around Chizuru's room at least be fortified? It is true that someone is after her.

Saito: Kazama Chikage, Amagri and Shiranui [check audio], the self-proclaimed group of oni......

Hijikata:......Indeed. In short I need to consult with Kondou-san about this....... Then, that'll be it for today's report.

Saito: Then I'll go make some tea. You should rest first. Sano, you should also drink some.

Harada: Oh, thanks a lot. Then I won't be impolite [rephrase later].

(Saito leaves then returns shortly after)

Saito: I've brought the tea. This is fresh[ly brewed] and hot, so please be careful.

Harada: Thank you. I didn't expect this so quickly.

Hijikata: (sips tea)......Oh, what's this, Saito? Did you use some other tea leaves today?

Saito: Nn?......No, I haven't done that.

Hijikata: Really? Then why do I feel that this tastes different from usual?

Harada: You didn't put poison in did you?

Saito:......!! Don't say such frightening words, Sano. The idea of me poisoning the Vice-Commander is complete nonsense. [i prefer the word 'utter']

Harada: Don't get angry, I was just kidding. (sips tea).......but, like Hijikata-san said, the taste of this tea really is odd/strange [tl says 'subtle']......

Saito: Strange? How could that be...... (sips tea)....!!

Harada: What's wrong? You've suddenly become quiet.

Saito: This taste is of...... Ishida Sanyaku ！？

Hijikata: Ahaha, I was thinking that this tasted a bit familiar, so that's what it was........ wa, wait! Why was that put into the tea!?

Harada: Saito..... you bastard, did you actually put Ishida Sanyaku into tea/you didn't actually put Ishida Sanyaku into tea did you? Even if you love that stuff, you should know when to stop before going too far [idiom. rephrase later]!

Saito: No......I would remember doing something like that. I only saw that the teapot lid was open, that there were tea leaves already inside, and that I was thinking how it could easily be brought over to be used......

Hijikata:......There was already tea inside? Did you notice if there was something strange/weird in the surroundings?

Saito: Speaking of which........ I saw something, I thought it was garbage so I ignored it, I think I remember how a note there was a written note saying "dedicated/specially for my wife. Dogs are strictly prohibited to touch this" or something like that.......

Hijikata: What, those words. From where do they....seem... familiar.......

(Hijikata collapses)

Saito: Vice-Commander!!

Harada: oi~ oi!! What's wrong, Hijikata-san! Why are you/why did you suddenly....... falling/collapsing/fall/collapse......!!

(Harada collapses)

Saito: Sano!! Why are you also......!!.......Why am I/How can I.......also....... be fainting........!

(Saito collapses)

Track 3

(footsteps)

Souji: Ha...... good grief, this is a real problem. I've long wanted to say this, but why is it necessary for us to submit a report about our patrols when nothing unusual happened?

Heisuke: I actually think that way too. But nothing can be done about this because of the rules~

Souji: Anyway, if nothing unusual happens, isn't it enough for Heisuke to make the report/that you make the report, Heisuke? I don't think I should be involved in giving it~

Heisuke: You just don't want to go to Hijikata-san's room. If you were giving a report to Kondou-san, you'd obviously be very happy.

Souji: That's because Hijikata-san sees me he won't stop talking as soon as he sees me. Before this, all I did was secretly prepared some ink and smeared a stone into it so that it turned black. He surprisingly became furious at me.

Heisuke:......Anyone who experienced this kind of thing would get really angry.......  Hijikata-san, we're coming in. (they stop walking and open a door) Hey~ Hijikata-san~! Eh? Ah? It seems that he isn't here?

Souji:......But, doesn't it look like he was was recently in the room? Look, something spilled on to the floor.

Heisuke: What~? Is it possible that he wasn't careful and spilled his teacup, then panicked as he left to go and get a towel to dry this?

Souji: Maybe. Anyhow/Speaking of which...... besides the tea, there seems to be some other strange thing on the floor...... What is this?

Heisuke:......Hijikata-san, Sano-san, and Hajime-kun? What are these, these puppets/figurines [or dolls] look very well made. These might be Hijikata-san's things, so it'd be better not to touch them.

Souji: Anyway it seems like he's not in his room right now. Nothing to be done about it then~ [we'll] hand in our report later.

Heisuke: Yeah. Really, just where did he go......

(they open the door and leave the room)

Track 4

Harada: Saito...... Oi, Saito...! Wake up, I'm telling you to wake up!

Saito:.......Mm...mrgh... S-Sano?

Harada: Yeah.... oh, wait a sec! It's good that you're awake, but you can't open your eyes yet!...... Well, how should I put this...... you need to be mentally prepared......

Saito:.....? What are you saying? What mental preparations......?

~music tune~

Saito:.......!! Sano!?………………Sano?

Harada: Why is that a question? Without a doubt, it's me, Harada Sanosuke.

Saito: No....... But, the Sano I know, doesn't have that height......

Harada: Don't worry, you've become just like me. Just look down at your own body.

Saito:.....!!  Even my sword is unsteady in these smaller hands, and if I step forward, there's the risk of falling over because this extremely big head..... What the hell happened to my body...!

Harada: I'll say it first, but this isn't a dream. Because I've already my face quite a few times.

Saito:......This lowly/humble body...... let alone moving, won't I be useless to the vice-commander and be unable to contribute to the Shinsengumi!?

Harada: In a sense, I don't think you'll need to worry about that? Take a look/Look, Hijikata-san has also become like/also looks like this.

~music tune~

Hijikata: Ah...... damn it......! My hands and feet [arms and legs] have gotten shorter, and everything else [tl is surroundings/everything in the surrounding] has become incredibly large......!

Saito: E-Even the Vice-Commander.....!? Why do you [also] have this awkward appearance......!!

Hijikata: Saito, you're awake. I just woke up...... Oi, Harada, why on earth have we become/do we look like this!

Harada: Even if you ask me that, I have no idea/I don't know. I was like this when I woke up.

Hijikata: Yeah....... well, since the three of us have all become like this, it's obvious/goes without saying that the pot of tea was strange.

Harada: Yeah. To begin with, it's strange to have tasted Ishida Sanyaku in tea.

Saito:......I see. That is to say that this is all due to Ishida Sanyaku......

Hijikata: No, that's impossible......

Saito: Ishida Sanyaku is a medicine that is meant to be taken with sake, because it was deviously put into tea, this sort of of trouble happened.......

???: Che~ how stupid [tl is more "stupid beyond the point of help/redemption but i can't figure out how to word that]! Devious? It's shameless to even guess/speculate about this [reword later].

Harada:......! That arrogant voice......! Kazama!!?!?

Hiijikata: You bastard! Are you actually here to harass Chizuru again[??? there's an idiom used in this sentence that I don't really get so i omitted it]!? Where the hell are you hiding!?

Kazama: HAH~! Are your eyes just decorations?  I don't run or hide, so are you not able to see who is before your eyes?

~music tune~

Saito: Ha....... so you've also become like this...

Harada: I couldn't help but look up just now ['doubt my eyes'ish or 'look away'.... or something?] . (whispers) Ha.... It turned out be some random passerby.

Kazama: You bastard, sighing after looking at someone else's face, you really know nothing about etiquette!

Hijikata:: After breaking into someone's home, it goes without saying that etiquette will go to the dogs [reword later]! Alright, Saito, Harada! Let's drive this guy out of headquarters!

Saito: Understood (draws sword)

Kazama: Ah~ do you plan on fighting me with that poor body of yours?

Hijikata: Look at yourself, aren't you also the same!?

Harada: Speaking of that guy, why are you even here?.... Don't tell me that it was your plan to make our bodies smaller!?

Kazama: Ha, have you finally noticed it. You idiots/fools with no brains.

Saito: In other words, this is all that guy's fault?! Making all of our bodies smaller, what do you intend on doing?!

Kazama: It has nothing to do with you. I was only looking for my wife.... Yes, only just my wife.... That damn vile medicine!! To actually make turn me into this inferior article!!

Hijikata: Although I don't get why you're so upset, quit rambling, and hurry up and tell us the way to get us back to normal!

Kazama:.......Che.

Saito: You still won't talk. Then violence can be the only answer [reword later. don't like how it reads]...!

Harada: Hold it, Saito!

Saito: Why are you stopping me, Sano! If we don't get the answer out of that guy's mouth, we won't be able to get our bodies back to normal!

Harada: Don't you think it's a bit strange? Kazama was originally the culprit with that medicine, but why is that guy so small now? If he was able to get back to normal, he already would have done that!

Hijikata: Co-Could it be.... you're not going to say that you don't know how to get us back to normal, right!

Kazama:  Did you finally realize it? You idiots with no intelligence!

Harada: Uwah....... I really want to beat him up......

Saito: Vice-Commander, please give me the order to cut that guy down!

Kazama: Che, listen to me! It's not that I don't know how to restore us to our original states. It's just that this method will be extremely difficult to accomplish.

Hijikata:……Difficult [Difficult how]……?

Kazama: It's simple to get back to our original states. The teapot with the medicine in it is still in the kitchen. We just need to drink more of that medicine, the "New and Improved Ishida Sanyaku."

Harada: I feel that I want to complain about the name of that medicine since it's a bit too subtle.... But will that really work?!

Kazama: Of course. As I possess the noble bloodline of the oni, it's impossible for me to lie.

Hijikata: For the time being, we'll believe what you say. For the time being, we'll believe what you say. You said it'd be difficult, but shouldn't being able to get into the kitchen smoothly, be the only problem? 

Saito: Indeed. Just from the drop to the ground, which looks as high a wall, you can definitely infer how difficult it will be to get to the kitchen...

Kazama: That's right. As a dog who can only wag his head and wag his tail, that ability to understand is really good.

Harada: How is it that I feel angry whenever I hear you say something nasty [reword later].... Well, since we're like this, if we have more people, we'll be able to solve this problem sooner.

Hijikata: Speaking of which...... if someone would pass by/if someone just passed by......

(voices heard in distance)

Souji: Eh~ really, I don't always want to be doing this every time~

Heisuke: Don't say that. Hijikata-san should be back at his room now, right?

Hijikata: Those voices just now...... are Souji and Heisuke's?

Saito: Souji! Heisuke! Come here......! Mmph......! (mouth gets covered by Harada)

Harada: Don't be impulsive, Saito!!

Saito (weakly) What are you doing......!

Harada: I'm telling you/Listen [to me], just think about it! Even if Heisuke helps, the other person there is Souji!

Hijikata: If that guy finds out that we're tiny/this small, who knows how he would react!

Saito: (gasps and moves Harada's hand away) Ha...... Indeed, he'd treat us like toys and handle us as if we were straw...... just imagining that gives me the chills [reword later]......

Kazama: Che, as expected of a pack of dogs made up of rogues and villains. It's amazing that how you don't even have confidence/trust in your own companions.

Hijikata: Shut up! Under these circumstances...! Perhaps Souji is the only exception!

Harada: In the first place, what should we be doing, Hijikata-san? We have to do something, so should we just tell Heisuke about what happened?

Hijikata: Uh………… No, let's pretend to be dolls for a while. After, we can wait for Yamazaki or maybe Gen-san....... ah, there's still Chizuru, [but] we should wait for someone reasonable to pass by.

Kazama: What are you saying? You're actually telling me to pretend to be a doll [reword later]!?

Hijikata; Shut up and just do as I say! Even if it's you, if you can't get back to normal, won't you have a lot of problems!

Kazama: Che. There's nothing to be done/that can be done about it then.

Harada: Heisuke's coming! Everyone stop talking!

(door slides open)

Heisuke: Hijikata-san~!  Hah!? Still not here......

Okita: That's strange. I just heard a very quiet voice just now, so I thought Hajime-kun was here. (looks around) Anyhow, why have these dolls that were placed here, so scattered around [reword later/thesaurus]? Furthermore, this/And this strange doll with blond hair, I don't remember seeing it earlier.  

Toudou: What is this, a doll of Kazama? There's even one of one of Sano-san, but why isn't there one of these odd dolls of you or me, Souji?

(Heisuke pokes Kazama's head)

Kazama: You bastard......! The only one in the world who is allowed to touch me, is my wife...!

Harada: Come on, don't talk, just be patient!

Souji: These two figures look very much like Hijikata-san and Hajime-kun... Come look at them, they look pretty funny/interesting~

(Souji pokes Hijikata's head)

Hijikata:………………！！！！

Saito:…………！

Okita: Nn? I seemed to have heard something strange?

Harada: Well since these are Hijikata-san's things, if you play around too much with them, he'll get super angry~

Souji: That's right. But, if we just leave them here like this, isn't it likely for that cat to play around with them [reword later]?

Heisuke: It's as you say though since they were already left in a mess, maybe that cat messed them up [reword later].

Souji: In that case, why don't we just put them all into a box? They can be also put into a closet where the cat won't be able to reach them.

Saito: ………………What!?

Harada: If that happens, won't we be unable to move!?

Hijikata: This bastard/guy, he just had to come up with such a rotten idea right now!

Heisuke: Let's hold onto them for the time being then. Anyway, we still need to come back later and give give the report for our patrol. At the time, we can return these to Hijikata-san.

Souji: You're not thinking about taking these back to your room to prank them because you're upset about the faces of these dolls, right [i think? reword later]?

Heisuke: This idea of yours won't be any good/You're the only one who would come up with such a bad idea... well, then I'll take the Sano-san and Kazama dolls for to hold onto for safekeeping.

Kazama: Kuh......! Things are getting more and more complicated...

--To be continued...?---

[callmepippin]

ok so i was tagged by the lovely @lexiklecksi for the 11/11/11 tag, the rules are: answer the 11 questions she asked me, make up my own 11 questions and then tag 11 ppl to answer those (so if you want you can skip to the questions at the bottom lmao). however as a fair warning: this got Way too long probably bc im rambly today. i tried to limit the stream of consciousness but….

1. current musical obsession: Frank Ocean and related sort of neo-r&b stuff - while writing this im also discovering Childish Gambino’s “Awaken, My Love!” (and also the song Golden Brown, but not bc im listening to it but bc im learning it on both guitar and piano)

2. 3 things i always take with me:

- wallet (or at least my id)

- phone (&earphones)

- cigarettes&lighter

3. what (or who) i miss most in lockdown: i dont rly remember? im so used to the situation by now that i kind of forget to miss what i did when things were “normal”... but i guess going to bars w/ friends, and just being able to go shopping when i need smth

4. pick: either only read 1 book or only read books picked by someone else: i wouldn’t be able to only read one book for the rest of my life! so definitely the second option (esp if i can pick the person who picks the books)

5. why i found your blog/followed you and if i intend to stay: uhh you followed me and when i checked your blog i liked the vibe i guess? also you were v nice in the tags of my music stuff! also ya i like it here, so im staying for a while

6. when and why did i last cry: i genuinely dont know for sure.. the last time i specifically remember crying was my granddad’s funeral, which is three yrs ago this month, but i do know ive cried once or twice since then, i just dont remember for sure when and why.

wait i do remember, i think the last time was when i saw Richard Says Goodbye (live music and movies or books are basically the only reason i rly cry, im not an emotional crier, dont know why).

7. who holds the key to my heart: my partner of five (and a bit) years, whom i love Very Much! (although ofc my heart is not locked, i have so much love to give, just romantically i am very much taken)

8, pick one: star wars/star trek, dobby/gollum, white/black magic, flying/teleportation, time travel: past/future?

- Star Wars

- Gollum (even though i have read hp but still havent read lotr, ive read the hobbit like 4 times tho)

- i think the hard dichotomy btwn white/black magic or like light/dark and good/bad in most fiction is often v flawed bc thats not how the world works, everything is grey areas (e.g. the Jedi are not better than the Sith, both have deeply flawed philosophies). the Force (or any magic for that matter) is not inherently good or evil, it just is. nature isnt abt good or evil, isnt abt opposites but abt balance.

and especially if you work with the occult and magical, i think thats all abt walking the edge between light and dark, life and death, night and day, good and bad etc…

so to answer the question: grey magic lmao, its all abt balance

- teleportation i think, bc while flying is very cool, i think teleportation has more practical uses (although also has danger involved, such as what happens if you teleport into a space that is already occupied by a person or an object? but for the sake of argument, prolly teleportation)

- do not even get me started on time travel.. the implications of time travel to the past are…… complicated to say the least (it only works if you believe in hard determinism, which i wholly do not). so in a practical sense, def to the future (although that is also Problematic within the constraints of our four-dimensional universe/experience).

in a philosophical sense though, ignoring all the paradoxes and laws of time and space, id still pick the future (or maybe no time travel at all), bc i think the past is the past for a reason. we remember it, we learn from it, but ultimately we must leave it behind.

my philosophical problem with traveling to the future is more that you cant just. skip life. so if you travel to the future, it has to be way beyond your own life and direct influence, or youll interfere with yourself and your own future, and thats scientifically, psychologically /and/ philosophically a v bad idea all round, i think.

9. which thoughts keep me awake at night: almost never specific thoughts, but quite often anxiety abt the near future. but theres no like, lingering issues that keep me awake.

10. what id do with you if we were locked up together for 24hrs: i think i’d really like to write with you! make poetry, song lyrics, make art! bc we could rly learn from each other i think and also we could just rly pick each others brain abt mundane, important and transcendental stuff ya know?

11. ask anything: do you have concrete, long term plans for the future, maybe even backup plans? a clear vision of how the rest of your life is going to go? or are you more the type to do what makes you happy now and figure it out as you go along?

my own questions (large variation in vibes and weight, i know):

describe your favourite colour using other senses (like what sound, smell, feeling or w/e do you associate with it)

what’s the best thing that happened to you in the last week, last month and last year?

what’s the one thing/what are the things that help(s) you get up in the moring and keep putting one foot in front of the other?

are you a leftie? (warning: there is a correct answer)

do you play/have you ever played a musical instrument? (and for the sake of completeness, yes i am counting singing as well)

do you have one thing (e.g. a song, movie, book or smth else) that never fails to bring you joy?

do you have one (or more) person(s) you feel you could still hit up after ten yrs of radio silence and you’d still vibe?

what’s your favourite song lyric/line from a poem/quote? and why?

who was your first celebrity crush? (if you’ve ever had one obvsly)

what’s smth you’re looking forward to? could be specific, could be a general thing like a driver’s licence or your own apartment or w/e

this one is specifically to feed my curiosity, indulge me: why did you follow me?

congrats, you’ve managed to reach the end! again, very sorry for the rambles, thanks for sticking around. im tagging @alt-heidi, @terdiscussie, @a-soul-to-cling-to, @ontvreemd, @sarahhnghae and i guess whoever fuckin feels like it? i literally can’t think of 11 ppl on this hell site, so if i forgot you its not personal. if we’re mutuals you’re especially tagged.

[sixofkaz]

heyo

so, what are your favourite tropes/aus, and if you wrote a fic, what would the concept be owo

ooh favorite tropes!! i havent read much the past few months ngl but i usually value friendships and good characterization in fics more than anything else as a general rule. im gonna list them out in an attempt to sound more comprehensive:

1. Found family, regardless of whether the members involved were gung ho or very tsundere abt this relationship

2. Enemies to friends (to lovers sometimes but that depends)

3. Childhood friends

4. Disaster Man Becomes Amazing but Reluctant Dad Figure

5. VIGILANTES

6. HEISTSSSS

7. Sloooooowwwwww Burn. almost to the point that if a romance doesnt have slow burn or an already well established relationship im gonna find it hard to ship it hdjhdj (ive read fics where the burn was beautifully slow and so well done i was dying by the end and it all happened in under 8k. honestly mad props to that author i dont remember who it was ;v;)

theres a couple more but i cannot remember what they were for the life of me

as for the fic writing concept:

back in like 2016-2017 when i wasnt allowed a second of internet access for over a year and was handed one of those old old brick phones in case my parents wanted to call me, i typed out a whole 20k+ fic into the notes of that phone (it didnt have enough space so id had to delete the first half orzzzz). bc it was 2016-2017 the fic was for,,,,voltron, before season 2 was ever announced.

(im gonna summarize it like hell bc there was so much lore) this fic starts off with keith dying when he got hit by a truck on his way to get groceries BUT ITS OKAY. it was set in an au where a person is reincarnated 3-4 years after they die. the beginning is in keiths pov till his death and then the rest is from lance's (with sprinkles of alluras). theyre uni students and live in the same apartment. allura and shiro are profs (theres no ships in this, but theres also a possible klance ending bc i love the idea of one particular plot twist).

allura is also leader of secret organisation altea from 10,000 years that got destroyed but she built it ground up. galra are time traveling organisation that destroyed altea. they keep attempting to take over the world by stealing alfors superior time machine plans (and plans for a particular lion-themed ass kicking robot :3) that almost all got destroyed too but shenanigans happened and allura has them, and shes trying to complete the design

allura is like best friends with shiro and by extension the rest of them and incidentally she has tech that detects galra time travel shenanigans (i had the concept and everything worked out for this too. i had so much time on my hands). for technical reasons she cant time travel and also seeing these guys so heartbroken even 2 weeks later is v painful. she tells them abt altea. they travel to the future. yes they meet future keith. yes they follow alluras (and future alluras) instructions and find out that keith was essential to galras takeover plan. as in the galra were killing keith bc they got word from time travel shenanigans that he'd be the reason they fall (im summarizing this so so so much orz)

also ptsd often passes on through reincarnations so Keith is terrified of rain (itd been raining when he died) and trucks and all this exposure to the rest of the hooligans keep giving him flashes of memories from his previous life

they come back with keith. theres a v good reason why and summarizing all this is so painful bc theres so much cool time travel shenanigans shit i was so proud of that im erasing in the summary but its been 5 years and it is 5 am rn but i am so so excited rn i want to write it.

thank u for this ask!! it really got the serotonin flowing ^u^