#this is how it goes every time literally without variation

[pa-pa-plasma]

why are people always so upset when you say liking Rowling's content & participating in that fandom is a red flag? "i put on TERF clothes & trans people attack (block) me" yeah dude because you're cosplaying as a fucking TERF. who would even want to do that let alone get so mad about it you actually turn into a TERF for real to defend your shitty children's novel that actual good authors said was shit back when it first came out. it got rejected by multiple publishers for a reason bro maybe take the hint & read something else

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

idk if you're still doing these but how do you think the animorphs would do against the original X-Men?

[Obligatory joke about the X-Men having an advantage because they cloned Jake to make Bobby.]

Animorphs Advantages

Trust in leadership. Full offense to Scott, but he can be bossy and overbearing to the point where it causes infighting. Jake's team will not hesitate to go up against impossible odds at his command, and basically never questions his orders in the heat of battle.

Flight hours. Warren might outweigh Tobias by a good 200 pounds, but he doesn't spend literally 15+ hours a day 7 days a week flying around hunting. And Tobias gets very good at taking out bigger opponents like David's golden eagle or the helmacron ship.

Adaptability. The Animorphs can survive in most environments most of the time, and are nigh unkillable. Jean can be taken out by a rock to the head. Scott can be taken out by a rock to Jean's head.

X-Men Advantages

Coordinated attacks. They can and do hit their enemies from multiple fonts at once: Warren goes high while Hank goes low, Jean goes mental as Bobby goes physical, so on. The Animorphs' weapons are all variations on hitting or stabbing their enemies up close.

Sheer raw power. Scott can punch a hole in a mountain. Jean may or may not be able to destroy entire planets. Bobby can make an entire city in the time it takes Scott to level one.

The fact that they actually go to school. Hank's obviously the one with the big advantage over the C- average high school dropouts, but Scott, Bobby, and Jean are also smart enough to be teachers in some continuities.

Animorphs Disadvantages

Distance. This is always their drawback, but they only have melee attacks. Scott, Jean, and Bobby can all attack from half a mile away.

Leaky communication. A ton of their strategy depends on being able to talk to each other without their enemies hearing. Even if they figure out that Jean can hear every word they're saying, they're going to be massively hampered by their inability to talk privately during battles.

X-Men Disadvantages

Compassion. Assuming that this is winner-take-all no-holds-barred fight, the X-Men will not only hesitate to kill, but are likely to stop fighting if one of their own is killed. The Animorphs have no such pangs of conscience, or at least don't let those stop them.

Lack of control. All of them are, to some extent, afraid of their own powers or hesitant to use them. You don't see Rachel beating herself up about what'd happen if she let the beast win or got too much phoenix power.

Conclusion: I'm giving this one to the mutants. Sorry, morphers.

[beomcharms]

detest! [TEASER]

pairings: actor!soobin x actor!reader

genre: e2l, idiots to lovers, actor au

warnings: mentions of anxiety, jealousy, both characters are mean at times, probable smut in the full fic (none in the teaser)

wc: 2.9k (full fic-tba)

release date: tba

a/n: it’s finally here!!! every word in this fic was literally squeezed out of me. i really hope y’all like it :)

taglist: leave a comment or an ask and i’ll add you 🤍

.𖥔 ݁ ˖⌗﹒

TEASER BELOW CUT

The lights were too bright. You could already feel the headache coming on from trying to remember all your lines.

“So, tell me Y/N, how was it like working with The Choi Soobin” the interviewer asks you with a smile.

You sigh inwardly. This was the third time you were answering this question.

Plastering on a smile, you pretend to contemplate before parroting off your answer.

“Ohh… it was genuinely the best experience…” your voice felt alien even to your ears.

Soobin was not helping things in the slightest. Leaning back in his chair with a cocky smirk, he pretends to fall asleep while you answer. You on the other hand were pretty sure you couldn’t handle another one of his “improvisations” as he liked to call it, while he goes completely off script.

You give him a little nudge and the interviewer laughs.

“You seem pretty tired with these questions” he says with a smile.

“Y/N gives the same answer all the time” Soobin says in mock pout and you feel like smacking him down with a chair.

You laugh along giving him a little push and Ssobin takes hold of your hands.

“Be honesttt now” he drawls out and you glance at his eyes. They’re full of mirth.

“Whaatt I AM being honest” you say “To work with you was a dream come true” you say gently, sure that the fans would go wild over this clip.

“Aww you guys are cutee” the interviewer says, “Alright then I have one last question for you Y/N”

No. You knew what was coming next. You hated this question twice as much as the rest of them. You feel Soobin’s teasing energy radiating off of him.

“How difficult was it to shoot the kiss scene?”

There it was.

-.-

To say Soobin and you didn’t get along would be an understatement. To say you detested each other to a point where neither of you could look at one another without gagging would be a more appropriate deduction.

You don’t know when exactly the rivalry began. You both went to the same acting school and had done multiple projects together before. But you just couldn’t seem to work together. Soobin felt like you were too practiced and poised and you felt like he was not trying hard enough. To see him on the big screen before you only added to your existing dislike for him.

He never took anything seriously. This was your debut break and you were sure that Soobin was purposefully holding himself back in some scenes for this film to flop. And who exactly would they blame? A rising star with hundreds of fans or the newbie that no one really knew?

-.-

You sighed inwardly before answering the question.

“It was the hardest scene to shoot, we just couldn’t get the angle right and I’d like to thank Soobin for being so patient…” you smile a little and look at Soobin the way you practiced and he winks back at you.

The interviewer chuckles before wrapping up the interview, wishing you luck on your film and shaking your hands.

Finally the lights turn off and both Soobin and you slump back into your chairs in exhaustion.

You close your eyes for a moment trying to collect yourself when you feel a finger poking you.

Tiredly you open your eyes and stare at Soobin hoping the exhaustion in your eyes is enough for him to leave you alone. Doesn’t seem like it though.

“You should try to be a little more creative with your answers instead of vomiting the same ones with little to no variation you know? Fans like a person with charisma not someone dull, lifeless” Soobin says in a pompous manner.

If you had the energy you would’ve toppled him over and set him on fire but you don’t so you just shrug at him and get off the chair.

This seems to wind Soobin up more.

“Look at you. Already tired and boring and we haven’t even finished all our promotions yet. I told you-

“Hey Soobin” you cut across him, “Can you like you know, shut up?” you ask him calmly.

You hear both your managers snort which is enough to soothe your anger for now.

Soobin is about to start his retort when his manager cuts him off.

“That’s enough the two of you. We have a lot of schedules to plan and you both have to get through all of it while looking on the verge of love” he says.

That was the worst part. Acting in a film with Soobin was bad enough. Now you had to act like you were about to fall in love with him to truly sell your role.

Your managers go over your schedule and by the end of it you’re pretty sure one of you is going to kill the other by the end of it.

“So, to sum it up, we have the party, a photo shoot, an overseas event and ofcourse the premier after which you guys wouldn’t have to be within five feet of each other” your manager smiles at the last part.

“Excellent” you say with relief.

“Just what I need” Soobin echoes.

Getting up from your seat you both thank the staff for their help and patience before heading off to your dressing rooms.

“When will you be arriving at the party?” Soobin asks you casually.

“Why do you care” you sigh, removing your heels. You look over at him loosening his tie and look away, something about the way he tugged at it made your stomach clench. Maybe you were going mad from hunger.

“Fine, if this is how you wish to spend the rest of the promotions, that’s fine” he huffs out.

“Around 8-8:30 I guess” you answer him quietly. “Who are you bringing?” You ask him.

Soobin wishes to answer your question the same way you answered his but looking over at you with you tiredly massaging your feet he can’t find it in himself.

“No one” he says. “See you there then” he says walking out.

“Bye” you mutter.

-.-

Cameras flash everywhere as you get off the car. Reporters barge in poking all their mics into your face. Your manager tries his best to push them away and you try to hide your eyes from the flashes

“Is it true you and Soobin did not get along on the set?”

“Y/N look here look here”

“Oh she is such a bitch”

You try your best to drown it out and hurry to get into the hall.

Once inside, you finally let out the breath you weren’t even sure you were holding. The anxiety that threatens to choke you down finally takes her hand away from your neck. You breathe and look around.

The party is crowded. You look out for a familiar face and notice Beomgyu and Yeonjun a few feet off to the bar. They seem deep in conversation and you slowly make your way towards them.

“I’m telling you it was a disaster- she had the most horrifying voice- Hey Y/N” Beomgyu stops mid sentence greeting you with a grin. “Nice dress” he adds, winking.

“I could’ve dressed her in something better” you hear Yeonjun drawl out and you smile a little to yourself.

“I’d like to protect what little is left of my dignity Jun-ah” you tell him calmly and Beomgyu snorts.

The designer narrows his eyes at you while you warmly pull him into a hug. You had known Yeonjun and Beomgyu since college. Design students and drama students went hand in hand and Yeonjun had helped design your dresses for stages multiple times before.

“I’m gonna let that one slide, because I like you” he tells you in a warning tone and you laugh.

“So which new singer are we badmouthing now” you ask Beomgyu.

“Jiyung- like you won’t believe” Beomgyu huffs out in frustration. “I put her on mute for a while to prevent myself from killing someone in the recording booth”

Yeonjun and you try to hide your laugh as Beomgyu animatedly explains his producer shenanigans.

“I don’t know how long I can hold onto my sanity before I stop being a producer and start my own dog cafe or something” Beomgyu sighs.

You rub his arm in consolation.

“Well, what is up with you? How are the promotions and how is the love of your life doing?” Yeonjun asks you and you echo Beomgyu’s sigh.

“Don’t get me started. The new rumour in town is that he and I didn’t get along on set and I wonder what the staff is gonna come up with now to diffuse it” you say.

“It’s not entirely a lie now, is it ?” Beomgyu smirks a little.

“Yah-” you start.

“I’m not too sure though” Yeonjun says thoughtfully. “The kiss…. it looked a little too real”

“It’s called acting” you huff out. Having to think about the kiss scene twice a day was painful.

“Hmm… I’ve known you way too long for that excuse to be believable Y/N” Yeonjun’s tells you with a small smile.

“For what to be believable?” Soobin asks and you nearly jump.

“Jesus Christ atleast let people know of your presence you idiot “ you tell him clutching your chest.

“So dramatic” he mutters while shaking hands and bumping shoulders with beomjun.

“I believe our seats are over there” you tell him pointing towards the tables. The dinner was about to start and you didn’t need Soobin hearing anymore about the Kiss.

This would be a publicised event, with photographers calculatedly talking shots of celebrities for their stories so your team had decided to place you two next to each other for the fans.

You sit down next to Soobin adjusting your dress a little.

Soobin looks over at you and takes note of your exposed thighs and gulps a little.

“You couldn’t find anything shorter to wear?” He huffs out.

“No” you tell him smiling sweetly as he rolls his eyes.

The MC rambles on about the founders of the trust who were throwing the party as part of charity. You make a silent prayer to god to give you the strength to make it through the event.

-.-

Soobin had gotten up a while ago and was now deep in conversation with Zhang Hao at the bar and you feel bored out of your mind. You know Soobin sort of hates you but to leave you hanging like this all night was a bit much. You look around at the other tables watching people converse and you can’t help but feel a little out of place.

You sense someone watching you, glancing up and you notice Minho looking at you. You give him a small smile and he grins back at you.

Minho had reached out to you when you were done filming, congratulating you. Casual conversations wherein you wanted to engage more but rarely had the time to, left you both as acquaintances and nothing more and yet here he was looking like he wanted to start something.

Flustered, you look down on your plate. You sense more than see Minho getting up from his seat and walk towards you. When he reaches your side you look up at him again and he still has the smile on his face.

“Mind if I sit down?” He asks you.

“Not really” you reply and he sits down next to you.

“So, tell me, why is the prettiest girl in the room sitting all by her lonesome?” Minho’s eyes crinkle as he asks the question and you blush a little.

“Guess I’m not pretty enough for this crowd” you answer him, tilting your head a little.

“Now, let’s not lie” he tells you dragging the chair closer to yours.

Maybe the night wouldn’t be too bad.

-.-

Soobin is still completely oblivious to what’s happening around him when he hears your laughter and he turns around.

There you were sitting at the table, laughing onto- wait was that Minho?

Something inside Soobin twists. He had gotten up to grab drinks for the both of you when he got sidetracked by Zhang Hao who insisted on keeping the conversation flowing.

Soobin’s eyes narrow when he sees you holding onto Minho’s arm to keep yourself upright while he was looking at you with adoration that Soobin wanted to smack out of him.

“Hao, I really need to go now” he mutters to the boy beside him pushing his way past. “Later”

-.-

You don’t think you’ve laughed this hard in a while. Minho’s dry comments about everyone had you cracking up more than you thought it would’ve. He was witty and charming and you found yourself in hysterics when you felt a familiar presence behind you.

“Minho” Soobin calls out and you look around to see him towering behind you. He glances once at you and for some reason you feel like sinking further down into your seat.

“Hi Soobin!” Minho greets him with a smile, “I was just telling Y/N about the Chan debacle”

Soobin gives him a tight lipped smile before looking back at you.

“I think our manager is looking for us” he tells you.

“I just saw him a couple of minutes ago and he mentioned nothing” you tell him puzzled.

“Yeah I just ran into him and he says its time for us to leave.long day tomorrow” Soobin tells you in a cold tone.

“But we haven’t even danced yet!” You huff out.

“Yeah, I’m sure one dance wouldn’t hurt anybody” Minho says getting up from his seat and adjusting his suit, holding out his hand to you.

“You’re right, maybe we SHOULD dance” Soobin tells you grabbing your arm and pulling you upto your feet cutting across Minho.

“Wai-“ you say trying to shake Soobin’s hold on you but his grip is vice like. Looking over his shoulder you mouth a quick sorry to Minho.

“That was so unnecessary” you hiss at Soobin. “You knew he wanted to dance with me”

Soobin tugs you closer to him, his hand on the small of your back. “And you tend to be forgetful about the fact that we are being filmed currently” he whispers into your ear.

The whole purpose of the event had completely slipped from your mind. Ofcourse you were being filmed and how would it look if you danced with some other man while Soobin was right next to you?

You look up at him guiltily.

“Forgot about it, didn’t you” Soobin huffs out.

“Well, the cameras didn’t seem to matter to you all that much when you ran off with Hao” you mutter silently.

Soobin holds back his smile.

“Aw, did princess miss me that much?” Soobin asks you in a playful tone and you pretend to gag.

“Please. If it weren’t for the cameras I wouldn’t even stand five feet next to you” you tell him.

“As if I would be caught dancing with you on any other occasion!” Soobin tells you indignantly.

You look up at him with narrowed eyes “FINE”

“Yeah fine” Soobin retorts, resting both of his hands on the small of your back while yours wrap around his shoulders

“Besides what was he talking about? What’s so funny?” Soobin asks in a quiet tone.

You smile a little thinking of Minho’s jokes before looking up at Soobin.

“I don’t know, I haven’t laughed this hard in a while” you answer him honestly.

“He should’ve debuted as a fucking comedian then” Soobin spits out. For completely unknown, some might call it envy-not Soobin, reasons he hates the way you talk about Minho.

“Aw, is my little prince jealous?” You ask him sweetly and Soobin pretends to puke leaning away from you.

You both sway a little to the dance, falling into a rhythm. Having been forced to spend so much time with one another, you’ve grown used to how the other one moves and feels.

Soobin is just so tall that your arms hurt a little from the strain of reaching upto his shoulders.

“Can you like bend a little you giraffe” you ask him.

Soobin scoffs before leaning down. You gulp a little at the proximity, an action not missed by Soobin who leans in closer still, almost touching foreheads.

You look away into the distance trying to calm your rising heart rate. Hoping to God that the dim lighting is enough to cover up your red cheeks you look back up at Soobin who is smiling at you.

“What”

“You’re cute when you’re flustered” He laughs out.

“You’re delusional, if you think you make me flustered Choi” you answer him dryly.

“Really?” He asks you softly leaning down closer still to you.

“Mmhmm” you manage to make out, trying not to let your voice show how affected you are.

“You can’t act even to save your own life” Soobin tells you, leaning back and you feel the competitive spirit in you flare up.

Pulling him down by his tie, so that your faces are only a couple inches apart, you ask him a question that’s been on your mind for the last couple of minutes.

“Were the cameras really the only reason you dragged me away from Minho?” You ask him calmly, looking deep into his eyes.

Soobin feels like a fish out of water. To have you, in his arms, staring at him like this was as close to a sensory overload as it could get.

“I- I uh-“ Soobin stammers around. He wonders if his brain has turned to mush. What was the question again?

“You can’t act to save your life” you retort throwing back his line at him and letting go of his tie.

Soobin leans back away from you and finally feels like he can breathe normally again. This was the first project you worked on after college ended. If he were a little more honest, Soobin would’ve admitted that he missed having you around. Excitement slowly bubbles up in his stomach at the thought of spending more time with you

This was going to be a long promotion.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖⌗

🎧this is the end of the teaser!! i hope yall liked it, if you did please leave a comment/reblog/like it helps me out a ton and consider giving my other fics a read xoxo🎧

[no1deepspacehater]

NSFW ABC's - Xavier !

A/N: Zayne is up next for this one! Minors look away ofc! Also some minor spoilers in letters E and K

Enjoy!

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Mostly, he’s so ready to sleep, but if that doesn’t fit your needs, he stays up for you. Need a shower? He’ll help you wash up. Something to eat? He’s not the best cook but cereal after sex always hits the spot anyways.

His most preferred aftercare is after a cold shower, you both just cuddle each other to sleep. You’re his favourite teddy bear to hold.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

For him, his arms. Strong and buff from years, and I mean years, of sword practicing. Upper body strength of the Gods, perfect for holding you up with he fucks you against the wall, or just caging you in while you ride him. Grip his arms in any position and he’s beaming.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Moderate amount when he cums BUT he leaks. One stroke and his dick is wet. Prefers to cum inside/with a condom just because it gets sticky and messy, but is SO more than down if you want him to cum anywhere else.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

While masturbating has accidentally came on one of the plushies you gave him. He fell asleep right after and it left a stain he couldn’t wash out. Said plushie is now hidden away where you’ll never find it, and when you ask him about it he always says he lost it.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

SPOILERS FOR HIS LORE!

Ok so here’s my headcanons, he’s either:

Has NEVER had sex because, well, he only wants you. Probably doesn’t watch porn for the same reason. Most knowledge he’s have is conversations with close friends but no hands on work.

HAS had sex before, but with previous lifetimes/timelines of you. Kinda more fun to work with this one because, he’d know all your sensitive spots, even ones you don’t know about. He’d now just how to rile you up and have you seeing literal stars.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

When he has energy or is in that type of mood: variations of missionary, I feel like he’d be into wall sex.

Other than that, as long as your on top of him and he could see your face, he’s happy. Sometimes he’ll let you do your thing while he’s being a little pillow princess, othertimes he’s the one in absolute control even though you’re above him.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Always light giggles here and there because you both are being so cute. Sometimes though he’s not serious but he gets in this focused/locked in type of mode when you both are having particularly passionate sex.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

HEAR ME OUT HERE!! Rarely clean shaven just because he’d literally rather sleep. It’s not a jungle, but definitely had to start keeping it lower when you both do start to get intimate. I’d say once a week at least, once every two weeks at least. Now listen closely, he’s got a happy trail, nobody argue with me. His hair down there is a bit darker/browner than his actual hair, but it’s still pretty light that if you look too fast you’ll miss it.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He’s a sappy little alien boy. Always showering you with praises so most of the time you’re a smiling blushing mess, which makes him smile as well. Even when he’s being dominant he’s calling you cute little pet names, anddd he’s got that smug little snark that’s just waiting for you to challenge him so he could show you who really is the most powerful here.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Doesn’t really do it much because sleep >> anything else. When he does have to release some pent up energy he generally just does it to get it out of the way and falls back asleep. Sometimes falls asleep dick in hand mid stroke.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

I feel like he would be into roleplay. It’d take him a while to bring it up, but once he does it kinda helps him to actually express his emotions more in a way? But having you dress up as different things turns him on as well (the maid outfit is not surviving the night).

Also hear me out on this I feel like he’d have a pregnancy kink. (SPOILER: Something about you both living long enough to have a family) You’d just look sexy with a belly to him.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

His or your place, where you can really let go. As for specifics:

The bed, the kitchen counter, the bathroom, the couch, to the windowww to the wall. As long as your both comfortable, he’s so down to screw you anywhere.

But thats not to say you both haven’t gotten... freakaayyy in the staff room closet at work once or twice... or five times.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Though he can just hear your name and he’s turned on, he particularly likes when you sass him back or give a little attitude. It’s like a declaration of sexual war between you two and he’s adamant that he wins.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Won’t bruise you too hard or hurt you in a serious way (like blood and stuff). He can’t, he just can’t. Hard choking as well is uncomfortable for him.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Lives for eating you out/giving head. Even if he’s too tired for penetration he’s got more than enough energy for you to sit on his face and just let him go wild. Or literally he’ll get on his knees and just keep going harder everytime you tug his hair when he’s hitting a sweet spot. Will literally overstimulate you every time because he’s just having so much fun.

As for receiving, he doesn’t ask for it much but would neverrr decline. He twitches so much and constantly has to hold himself back from bucking his hips up and shoving his dick down your throat. Hearing you swallow all of his cum makes him literally orgasm a second time.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Fast, no, rarely. Slow, sensual, rough in an almost primal like way but still soft? Yes! He needs to feel every bit of you, and make sure you’re feeling every bit of him.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Appreciative of a good quickie. Though he’s more qeen on having ample time to do with you what he wants, there has been situations where he’s had to pull you to an empty room and set a new world record for the both of you. Sometimes the both of you are at home doing the nasty when you get called to a mission, and then suddenly it’s a race for time lol.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

If it’s for you, he’ll try anything (within reason). He is a risk taker as well, because really to him it’s not a risk if he’s going to succeed anyway. Just has to make sure he’s thought of every outcome and weighed out the pros vs cons, which he can decide very quickly when you’re looking at him like that.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Depends on how much time between the rounds. After round one, let him take a quick nap and he’s back on it like white on rice. Anything more than that will require a full day of sleeping with cuddles with you.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

I feel like personally he never bothered with toys, but would not be opposed to use one on you. It’s like having another way to satisfy you (and tease you endlessly). He likes to feel your touch rather than a toy but he’s okay with anything you want mostly.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He’s such a switch, honestly. One day he’s begging for you and the next he’s making YOU beg until you literally can’t handle it.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

This man is a moaner and whimperer. He tries to hold it back mostly so it’s a lot of hot whimpering and mumbling at first but keep riling him up he’ll get louder. Says your name like a prayer always.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

 Turns your plushies around before you guys have sex, all of them. He says he doesn’t want to taint their innocence.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Thick in diameter, average sized in length. Definitely a shower but it’s pretty like him in every way anyway. Has one (1) prominent vein that hits just right. Colour just slightly darker than his skin colour (he’s pretty pale so) but tip is a light pink (#E6C5AD, if you will). Turns more red as he’s about to cum/is stroking or whatever. Yes I have thought a lot about this.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Having to wait lifetimes for your lover can leave you pretty wanting at times. That being said Xavier doesn’t really indulge in himself too often, and he’s quite the sleeper so in general it’s pretty low. But it can lead to some fun times where he’s just teasing you forever.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Like a LIGHT. After proper aftercare he is ready for the nap of his life.

[simspaghetti]

This has been a long time coming, I've been wanting to make something like this for ages and I finally had some time over the weekend to get it done - I dunno how useful this will be for anyone else, but hopefully at least a few other people might find this template handy!

Here's a full size picture of what the blank template looks like:

I made a couple examples of what it can look like edited over screenshots - as you can see you can just resize the boxes & text as you like to get the ideal final product:

Instructions for use:

This is a .psd file, and as such it needs to be opened in an editing tool that allows that file format - I personally use photopea which is a free online alternative to adobe photoshop - Disclaimer: I haven't tried using it any other editing software like photoshop / gimp but it'll probably work in there too, if you have any problems in those apps lmk and I'll try and fix it!

Each section of the template is separated into folders, open these up and you can edit the text / image elements for each section, you'll need to hide and unhide layers to be able to do this (the little eye icon next to a layer toggles it to be hidden / unhidden)

If you need to resize the boxes, make sure to hold down the shift-key so that you're able to do it more precisley

I have included icons for every career in the sims 3 including all of the expansion packs, however I have not included the skill images you might need as that would be a bit too extensive

For the skill images, I recommend downloading this ultimate icon collection from ModTheSims, as it'll almost definetly have everything you could possibly need to use :)

Terms of Use:

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[abnomi]

PSYCHOANALYSIS ON CHARACTER PASTS IN WRECK IT RALPH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!

ok... so you know how some characters were never given a backstory to play off of? (like Turbo for example)

i dont know for certain the psychological impact that not having a past could have on video game characters (or if they would even care), but what i do know is that it is objectively damaging to not have anything that came beforehand to work with.

imagine being tossed into a world, have whatever code implanted into your brain tell you specifically what you need to do, not have any choice in the matter, and then be forced to go from there. whether or not the individual believes they need a past is irrelevant; they lack one, regardless.

the psychological differences between video game characters with a past and those without come into question... are those who have a solidified memory of who they were before more or less susceptible to growth over time? or are they both intrinsically equal? maybe it depends on who it is, what game theyre from. some could thrive off of the idea of not being latched onto a past that was chosen for them, while others could long for at least some semblance of an in-between.

all things considered, it would be significantly more difficult to have a broad understanding of emotions when you aren't granted access to the same grace that those with a "before" may have. without any memories, you'd have to rely on your external surroundings to achieve any kind of development; a noticeable contrast to those who already have at least some internal understanding of themselves that came with their programming.

characters who begin their life with a clean slate may be bound to being more actively involved with the world around them because it's how they have to learn. if they don't, they're going to get stuck in the same mindset for an indiscernible amount of time until some kind of external force pulls them out of it. they don't have knowledge of their initial life; all they have is the current moment.

a big factor that correlates with all of this is the psychology of nature vs nurture. in short, "nature" is the deterministic aspect of genetics (or in this case, code) influencing who one may be, while "nurture" is how one's development is influenced by the role that one's surroundings might play. in humans, we experience both of these; they go hand-in-hand. in the WiR universe, however, it's not always guaranteed that a character will have a chance at having both at once.

those with a past get both nature and nurture, bundled into one package. however, those without are only presented with nurture, tossed into a world and expected to move on from there (maybe with a faint sprinkle of nature, but not anything that goes beyond an implication of what their life was like before spawning in). they have limited options compared to the ones who don't have to start off on a blank slate.

something else to keep in mind is how without the presence of a past, there will be far more variations between the same character across different locations. without any code telling them who they used to be, they will learn about who they are through their environment and go from there. of course, no single character will be the exact same, but code largely determines the mindset of a character and how they process the world around them.

in Turbo's case, i personally think it wouldn't matter a whole lot to him because of its irrelevance to his main concerns, but it undeniably had a strong hold over his behavioral development as an individual; he is very immature. he had no foundation to start off with... well, other than the message that was branded into his mind, dictating every decision that he has ever made: he has to win.

he acted like a child when he first came around because, in a sense, he was one (not literally HAHA, i think of him as in his late 30s). his game was plugged in for about five years before he had the biggest tantrum of his life, and keeping in mind how game characters are technically immortal until the moment they're unplugged (unless they die in another game before then), this really wasn't that much time in the grand scheme of things. it was hardly anything at all.

without a healthy outlet to process his feelings, coupled with an unnerving lack of life experience beforehand, of course he'd lash out a lot! of course he'd be overwhelmed by his own emotions to the point of not knowing what to do with himself!

that doesn't excuse his behavior at all, as he did have opportunities to change for the better or learn from his mistakes, but he chose not to. he was too stubborn for his own good.

maybe part of the reason he's so hellbent on being the best is not only because it's lodged into his code to feel that way, but also because it would feel like betraying what little personality he was coded with to go against it. yes, he's never been too keen on the idea of having anything or anyone tell him what to do, but consider this: he's clinging to his own identity, protecting what small fragments he was given and holding onto them for dear life. he doesnt have a past; he has goals, and losing said goals would be losing himself and the footing he has on his own identity. he's defined by succeeding, and he refuses to let this go. this is more headcanon-territory but it is fun to explore concepts like these!!! bro is internally empty.......

Felix has a past, yes, but it's vague and uncertain. he had a father, but does he even know what the man looked like? who he was beyond a name and an heirloom?

notice how it took thirty years for the handyman to shift his perspective on who Ralph was as a person. this could likely both be a product of the nicelanders and himself all being programmed with the belief that "Ralph is a bad guy," thus internalizing it, combined with the external influence and pressure Felix upheld being the good guy. (EDIT (LOL!!!!!): i know felix doesnt hate ralph but constantly being surrounded by everyones fear of him would have at least made him cautious about interacting with him)

his younger years have no hold on how he makes decisions, especially considering how absent said years are. his code only hints at the idea of a father, alongside the foundational belief that he is good.

his lack of a clear upbringing contributed even more to his sheltered persona, oblivious to the hardships that everyone else might face. combine this with how every NPC he surrounded himself with never dared to criticize him, he was prone to experience stunted empathetic development. he was never a bad guy by any means, but his lack of exposure to difficult situations did not fare well for his psyche.

that isn't to say he hadn't ever been in any difficult situations before. the roadblasters incident absolutely shook him to his core and likely cut deep into him, as he hadn't ever experienced anything similar to it before. without a fleshed-out past, he didn't have a bright idea of what hardships might linger just beneath the surface.

to his credit, he has changed for the better, now having more awareness of how others feel and function outside of himself. he makes sure to treat everyone with equal amounts of dignity, regardless of any preconceived notions he might have. :-]

when it comes to Calhoun, her experiences shape her significantly, directly being the cause of her hypervigilant and instinctual nature. it can't be ignored that she suffers from PTSD due to how her character's life was mapped. this demonstrates that having knowledge of who one was before isn't always necessarily a wholly good thing. not to say that her condition makes her broken in any way! it just brings difficulty into her life that wouldn't have been present otherwise.

there is some goodness that can be brought to the surface from this; just as it isn't completely good, it isn't completely bad, either. on the opposite end of the coin, she knows how to keep herself and others safe. if it weren't for her predetermined past, she'd potentially face more struggles on the battlefield.

not only that, but it helps us, as the audience, empathize with her character, along with Felix. we learn that she isn't simply intense and nothing beyond that; she's just been through a lot. on top of all of this, she is very emotionally mature and understands how to push through horrific situations, especially when necessary. it is her job to do so, after all!

Calhoun's heavy experiences may be part of her character's mold, but they do not define who she is. a past only steers a character in an approximate direction; it does not 100% determine how they grow from there. we directly see evidence of this when she moves forward and marries Felix :-]

and then there's Vanellope :-] she did have a past, but it was ripped away from her. how does she cope with this? by defining herself and becoming her own person, unrestricted by her code. she didn't start off as a princess, she started off as Vanellope.

even when she had the chance to reclaim her status as princess, she didn't, instead choosing to stick with the version of herself that she passionately created. there's a great chance that she wouldn't be the silly little booger we all know and love if it weren't for her time to think about who she was and who she wanted to be; the omission of her past was a significant contributor in how she now presents herself, unconfined to how she is apparently "supposed" to be. she has more room to choose for herself.

she doesn't let anyone else tell her who she is, holding her handcrafted identity with pride. her eccentricity is nowhere near a flaw, making itself known as a strength. her perspective of the world is unique to her and allows her to emotionally connect on a deep level with Ralph.

one doesn't need to be tied to a past to be a person. it doesnt put any more or less weight on anyone's worth, and we see this as clear as day with her character! starting off with nothing, she grew into her own skin and found her sense of self all by herself without the guidance of anyone else. i am so proud of her. i love my baby ok

above all else, having a past isn't a surefire way to predict how one may develop; it is only an aspect of who someone is. an important aspect, yes, but there are many other things to consider in the sea of personalities and experiences...

the biggest difference between having one and lacking one is ultimately how an individual character might go about how they change over time and how long said progression might take. the past is only a starting point; a pre-written map without a marked destination created in order to provide a basic concept of who exactly one was earlier on. being left without one leaves some with a need for more effort to figure life out, and this distinction will affect everyone in many different ways. at the end of the day, though, a map is just a map. the road itself is what matters most 👍

[argumentativeaxolotl]

Random Human AU Cars headcanons that probably don’t make any sense before I go to bed bc I can.

Lightning McQueen:

- Has accidentally called Doc “dad” before

- Has accidentally called Strip “dad” as well

- Bro can literally not stop moving- like he will not sit still and he tries so hard

- He has the shortest attention span ever if it doesn’t have to do with his friends or racing

- He actually really enjoys American Football and plays a modified version with Mater sometimes

- He was an orphan growing up

- Bro would 100% go apeshit feral if he lost a game of Uno

- Loves carnivals

- Dog person

- Forgets he’s rich sometimes and he can make his own decisions about money

- His love language is hugs and gifts

- He bought the Hot Wheels of his car and continues to buy every variation

Chick Hicks:

- Bit other kids as a child

- Filled water guns with lemonade and shot at people’s eyes

- Daddy issues(actually this is canon isn’t it?)

- Cat person

- Frighteningly good at card games like Casino “house always wins” levels of good. Like bro will somehow know what your cards are without even looking at them

- He put rocks in snowballs

- Alcoholic

- Loves anything horror, gorey, and True Crime

- He’s notoriously bad at getting people gifts, like seriously bro is not allowed to buy anything for anyone for Christmas or their birthdays that’s how bad it is(someone usually gets it for him)

- He probably has a huge gambling problem

- His love language is giving gifts

- He gives gifts as a form of apology because he’s shit at words

- Literally the best mustache in all of cars- like he keeps that thing at top condition 101% of the time

- He never actually finished school because his dad forced him into racing as soon as he could

- Probably had rabies at one point and somehow survived

- If you somehow manage to become a good friend of his, he’ll actually be super chill w/ you

- Rich as FUCK

Strip Weathers:

- Legally adopted Cal after his parents passed away(or sumn idk)

- Has several scars on his arm from the crash during the tie-breaker race

- He, Tex, Lynda, and Cal were practically inseparable after the crash

- He and Tex are literally the bestest of buds like they are homies to the MAX

- He doesn’t hold any ill-will against Chick even if he should and is allowed to

- The “Boy Scout” of racing(think Superman or Captain America)

- He listens to “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X while working with his horses. Cal cringes every time.

- He never swears unless he’s serious about something or is extremely upset or concerned

- He almost fainted when he met Doc for the first time, almost immediately asking for an autograph

- He has a ranch full of horses and enjoys horse racing as well as car racing

- Received an apology gift of both cologne and a miniature trophy from Chick

- He let Chick sign his cast after the crash

- He’s tried to teach Lightning and Bobby how to ride horses with Cal’s help. It did not go well

- He wanted to be a doctor for a little while before switching career paths

- Racing is literally in his blood(he comes from a very VERY long line of racers)

- Weirdly good at writing. Like for no reason.

- He heavily fanboyed over Doc when he was younger

Doc Hudson:

- He loves Lightning as his son

- He thinks of Sally as a surrogate daughter

- Unironically says “back in my day” whenever he’s telling a story

- He owns a shotgun and it’s hidden away in his house, far away from Lightning(who keeps trying to find it with no luck)

- He knows the most shit out of everyone and all their backstories. Bro hears the gossip and goes “nice”

- He loves watching fruit dissection videos on YouTube for some reason

- Bro is great at knitting. Like seriously. Give him ten seconds and you’ll have a whole ass sweater with a theme and everything

- He is an alcoholic(especially after his crash)

- Never got married or had children… until Lightning and Sally lmaooo

- He nearly started crying tears of joy when Lightning called him dad the first time

- He has several large burns and scars on his legs and lower back from the crash(like shit is really bad dude)

- His favorite movie is the original ghost busters

- He is a cat person

- He is a neat freak at heart yet gave up trying to clean out his garage because of all the bad memories

[sinswithpleasure]

Addressing My Ask Box

Hey guys, Sins here.

I'm sorry if this might seem rude and/or entitled, but I feel that I have to get this off my chest.

First of all, I really appreciate the flood of asks just off today. I like that you readers are actively willing to engage me and reach out in any shape or form, but I have to set some ground rules.

Nearly every ask since my last fic in July has been the same variation of "idol and idol cuddling" and "idol x idol sex", and I'm really getting burnt out on these. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate that you all have put in the time to type all of it out, but I'm really not sure if you want a fic, you're just dumping random things, or...?

I've seen my fair share of "top 5 idols whose pits u wanna lick" to just, pure statements that i can't reply to, such as "i think chaewon has great tits" or "wony can't stop eating gaeul's cunt". Most of the time, I'm actively not sure what to do with this—I'm very lost on your intentions and would prefer more clarity.

I've actually said this privately to a lot of other writers: low effort ask means low effort reply. Any ask I don't understand either gets deleted or answered with one word only. I really don't want to give low effort replies because to me, being a writer is akin to being a customer service representative—my job is to serve up stuff that makes you enjoy yourself, and part of that is giving you good replies to the asks that you put time into to type into my ask box. However, there's really not much I can work on with one liners without context other than "nise" because I really don't know what to do with them, and I do not want to delete asks so readily since you have put effort into them.

I've always found how sapphics send asks to wlw blogs here, as well as on platforms like CuriousCat or Retrospring so wonderful. For example:

kmj saying on live that the other members would be different baseball positions and she would be the cheerleader...three way gang bang for mj in a tiny little skirt please

was a literal ask a friend of mine on twt got about aespa, and it's stuff like this where I can expand on and help you realise a fantasy. Not only that, it's also fun for me because there is context. I need more than sex to build up any piece of a fic for you—idea generation is not as easy as it seems. The example above at least has a setting I can imagine, characters that I can explore, and all in all has space for inspirational expansion.

Tldr—Help me help you. Give me more context, give me something more than the sex acts. This goes for a lot of suggestion-type asks—the more effort you put into an idea to suggest, the more receptive most writers will be.

Thank you.

Sins.

[littleslaywrites]

pas de deux- variations | spencer reid x bau!reader 

pt 3 of pas de deux - based on request by @kakamixoxo

summary: while teaching the ballet class your substituting for, spencer comes in to “help”

word count: 1.5k

cw: f!reader, fluff

Having finally put together your lesson plans, you were on your way to teach the ballet class you’d agreed to substitute for. You had left work an hour early for the fifth day, Hotch not minding giving you the time off since you were consistent otherwise. 

Driving to the studio for the past few days, you felt oddly nervous. You faced criminals every day but were anxious over some baby ballerinas. You remember being in your first years of ballet, how you looked up to your teachers and the older girls in the studio. The girls were energetic, but eager to learn. You felt yourself saddened by the fact that today would be your last day filling in. It sounded cliche, but you were going to miss the feeling of teaching the next generation of dancers. 

After changing and setting up in the studio, you open the door to let the kids pile in. Whispered conversations between each other and shouts of “good afternoon, Miss y/n” fill the room. 

A few minutes into class, you hear the door opening, Spencer’s tall frame juxtaposed against the girls at the barre. 

“It seems like we have a special guest joining us today in class,” you say. Spencer walks over to an empty space behind you. 

“I came to help,” he says. You raise an eyebrow, recalling your attempt to teach him. Nevertheless, you decide to go along with it, introducing him as “Mr. Spencer” and allowing him to stand behind you at the barre in the middle of the floor. 

“Now we’ll move on to rond de jambe,” you say. The girls have learned the combination by now, so you review it very briefly before reaching for the remote to turn the music on. Spencer watches the moves, remembering the steps but having no idea how to execute them correctly. 

Seeing everyone else grab the barre and straighten their posture, Spencer follows suit. He suddenly realizes he’s the tallest in the class, feeling a little awkward. When the music begins, he follows along to what you’re doing, until he has to turn to the other side. When he’s no longer facing you, he begins to hear giggles from the students at his creative interpretation of technique. He can tell they’re trying to be polite, not wanting to make fun of a guest. 

The music ends, and you try to move on without giving in to the laughter, knowing once you do, you won’t be able to stop. “Okay, frappé is next.” You model the steps, taking extra care to show how you go from flex to point with the ball of your foot hitting the floor, thinking of Spencer watching behind you. You can imagine the way he was staring, absorbing the information. 

Unfortunately for him, even the best memory could not make up for his lack of knowledge. Even before you turned, you could tell he was taking creative liberties from the sound of his stomps. When you face him, you see the way he’s executing the step, almost tap-dancing. You can’t hold yourself from laughing at the picture, and the girls join in. At one point, he even managed to literally trip over his own feet. Giggling through the rest of the combination, you watch as he turns to look back at you, smiling when he meets your eyes. 

“If you couldn’t tell, I haven’t ever taken a ballet class before,” Spencer shrugs after the music stops. This makes the class laugh even harder. “Miss y/n gave me a quick lesson last week,” he defends himself. “Watch—“ he says, trying to do a pirouette. His foot only makes it up to his ankle and the turn goes about 90° before he falters.  

“I don’t think Mr. Spencer is dressed right for class,” one of your students says. You study his outfit: sweater, dress pants, mismatched socks (he took his shoes off at the door), and a tie. 

“I regret to inform you that she may be correct,” you say after looking him up and down. “You know, most people wouldn’t be allowed to attend class with that kind of dress code violation.”

The girls all shake their heads and shout out their opposition to that idea. “I guess we’ll let him stay,” you sigh. “You should be grateful for your backup, Mr. Spencer. Let’s hope you're better at battements.”

It goes without saying that Spencer was not better at battements. He watched your kicks reach the tip of your nose, thinking it couldn’t be that difficult from how easy you made it look. Intently, he prepared to kick, but his foot only made it about a foot and a half off the floor. This causes the room to break back into laughter, especially considering the focus that was visible on his face. 

“I’m sorry, Mr. Spencer, but I’m beginning to think a career in ballet may not be for you,” you say. 

“The reason we can kick higher is because we’re shorter,” a student pipes up, making you raise your eyebrows. 

“I’m sure that’s it,” you reply sarcastically, sending the giggling girls outside to their five minute water break before center. 

“It’s really a good thing you’re smart, because your talent does not lie within anything physical,” you tease him. 

“Nothing physical?” he teases back.

“Oh my god, Spencer,” you snort at his innuendo. “But really, if you weren’t so cute doing ballet, it would be painful to watch.”

“You make it look easy.” You blush at his compliment, going to get your own water. He smiles at you, restraining himself from pulling you into a kiss, not wanting to embarrass you in front of your students. 

“I guess I better get back to work,” he says. 

“You’re going back?”

“I took a half hour break from my paperwork,” he admits. “I couldn’t resist seeing you dance.”

You thought your smiler couldn't get any wider, but his comment somehow does. He smiles back, savoring the joy he brings you. He loved seeing you in the studio because of how happy you were when you were dancing, even if it was a simple warm up at the barre. Similarly, his goal was always to bring the same smile to your face with his words. Every time he made you blush or giggle, he’d swear it was the most beautiful sight his eyes had ever beheld, more than any painting in a museum or poem he could read. 

Spencer always made you feel spoiled. His pilgrimage to the studio was just one example of the lengths he’d go for you. You’d scold him, but you knew it was just as much for himself as it was for you. Besides, whenever he’d sense you were going to tell him not to go out of his way to please you, he’d look at you with those eyes that he knew would make you weak in the knees (and the heart).

Ever the gentleman, he checks to make sure the girls are distracted before giving you a quick kiss goodbye. “You're a fantastic teacher,” he says before slipping out the door. “Even for a difficult student like me.” 

“Is Mr. Spencer leaving?” one of the girls asks as they all come in from their break. 

Returning your water to its place by the stereo, you say “Mr. Spencer needs to get back to work.”

“But he’s so funny!” one girl protests. 

“Maybe I can come visit another time,” he says, “once I get some more practice in. Then maybe I can be as good as you all are.”

They wave goodbye as he slips out the door, quickly distracted by the new combination you teach them. 

Coming home that night, you find Spencer is already on the couch. 

“How were the rest of your classes?” he asks, looking up from his book. 

Setting your bag down, you meet him at the couch and sit down. “Pretty good, less entertaining without you as a student.”

He smiles, placing his hand on your thigh. “I went to the bookstore after work.”

“Shocker.”

“I found a history of ballet. Did you know that ballet was originally a display of athleticism?”

“No wonder you’re so bad at it,” you say, causing you both to chuckle at your mean comment. Despite your teasing, his interest in what you love will always warm your heart. 

He closes the book, pulling you closer into a hug. “It’s too bad your time subbing is over.” He traces his thumb along your thigh. “I’ll miss seeing you practice your lessons.”

You rest your head on his shoulder, and he kisses your forehead. Eyes closing, you feel comfort in his presence. Your mind begins to wander, comparing the comfort of his arms to the feeling you get when you’re dancing. 

“What are you smiling about?” he questions. 

“You.” 

He pulls you up into a kiss. He’s glad you share your life and your art with him. Letting you rest your head on his chest, he feels you fall asleep. He knows you’ll be annoyed that you fell asleep on the couch, but he can’t bring himself to wake you. He picks the book back up, only pausing his reading to look down at the way you smile in your sleep.

[cy-cyborg]

Earlier today I saw a video from Council of geeks on Youtube talking about how frequently and potentially overused swearing is in adult animation. It’s a great video, but I wanted to add my 2c to the conversation real quick.

I grew up in rural Australia in an area that is primarily inhabited by bogans, and if there’s one thing rural bogans know, it’s casual swearing. Australia as a whole uses the word “cunt” in almost the same way we say “mate” - in some circles “cunt” is seen as the friendlier option, and bogans take that even further. constant, frequent swearing was such a normalised part of speech when I was a kid that it was normal for our teachers in high school (which starts in years 6 or 7 depending on the state, and goes all the way to year 12) to swear at us. Not aggressively mind you, they just used the words casually, and the kids would swear at them back. It wasn’t usually an issue, even when they were trying to be an asshole.

Despite this, even I find a lot of adult animation’s use of swear words a bit jarring at times, and I think Council of Geeks put the feeling i’d had about it into words very well: it’s the way a lot of these shows draw attention to it, even when it’s supposedly normalised.

The people back home can hardly get through a sentence without swearing at least once. at least. I use the word “fuck’n…” the same way other people use “umm…” and I know someone who named their dogs “sick cunt” (or “cunty” for short) and my own dad named one of my childhood dogs “fugly” (short for fucking ugly - that was his legal name my dad put on his adoption paperwork from the shelter). when these words are used so often, they do loose their impact, and you can tell they have by the way we all use them around there. If you’re going to use that same kind of frequent “bad” language in your work, you need to acknowledge it too. that’s where a lot of shows who try to emulate this way of speaking fall over.

As funny as it is to say, Spongbob was right when it called the obvious stand-ins for swear words “sentence enhancers” - that is usually the goal of words like “fuck” and “shit” when not used in the context of their literal definitions: to put emphasis on what’s being said. You could say “This traffic is SO slow!” or you could say “Fuck! This traffic is SO fucking slow!”. You could say “are you kidding me?” or you could say “Are you shitting me?” - in both these cases, the addition of the swear words emphasises the rest of the sentence and the emotion behind it.

But when you are swearing every other word, they stop working that way. “this traffic is so fucking slow” is a lot less impactful when that’s the 5th time you’ve said some variation of “fucking” that conversation. So when people back home swear, it’s just a filler word. there is no emphasis, there’s not heightened emotion, nothing. It’s a normal, standard part of speech that is so common and normalised, it sounds weird to people back home when you don’t use it. I’d go so far as to say it get’s the same kind of reaction from people back home as if you were speaking with flat affect (I’m saying this as an autistic person who took a while to warm up to swearing like that, with autistic friends who spoke with very little tone or expression).

phrases like “ah get fucked cunt” are an honestly very casual and friendly phrase (no, I’m not exaggerating) said the same tone you might use to say “nah I don’t feel like [whatever the topic of conversation was]”. honestly I tried to give some more examples, but it’s extremely difficult to demonstrate over text. Australia has a pretty big film and TV industry though, so if you want some examples of what I mean, watch some Aussie TV (look for anything with an MA or R rating, anything under that and they will likely limit the use of “foul language”) especially anything set in small towns or the bush or find rural aussie creators online.

My point is, If you want to have swearing and cursing as a part of your regular vocabulary in your setting, you need to treat it like it’s actually normalised like any other word. If you wouldn’t put emphasis on words like “house” or “dog” or “car” then don’t put that emphasis on words like “fuck” and “shit” lol.

[azrielbrainrot]

Nsfw Alphabet with Lucien Vanserra

note: i don't know how i feel about this one. i kind of have 2 different versions of lucien running around my brain and i just picked the kinkier one for this. i think this is part of how lucien was when he was younger and after he heals from all the things that happened in the books, so a happier lucien.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Really sweet and attentive. Brings you water and helps you clean up. Cuddles after.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

I know this is supposed to be sexy but I just know it's his hair. I just know he takes really good care of it, it's probably so soft.

I never know what to say for this but I do kind of see lucien as a boob appreciator.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Likes cumming on you and then playing with it. Even if he cums inside, he'll either fuck it back into you or eat it out of you. I don't know why but I see him as liking things messy. Like he's been fucking you for hours, you already have cum over your tits and stomach but you still feel him pull out again to cum over your pussy and then push back inside you to keep going.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I don't know if it's a secret because he would end up admitting it to you but he definitely likes being pegged. I don't know if there are dildos in this world so this is probably more of a modern au type thing but yeah he'd definitely love it.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Very experienced, he's centuries old after all.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

The softer part of me wants to say missionary or any variation of it because he loves seeing you fall apart on his cock and doesn't want to miss any expression or little noise. But he loves fucking you from the back just as much. Just laying on your stomach, moaning into the mattress feeling his weight on you as he literally ruts into you as deep as he can go. Probably depends on the mood really.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Some days he's serious and others he's not. Depending on the mood, how rough he is or even the time of day. Morning sex is filled with soft smiles and little giggles but when you both come home after a party or dinner and he's been waiting for hours to finally have you he's not playful at all.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I think he's well groomed but nothing crazy. It does match, yes.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Well there's always an underlining intimacy but when he's in a dirty or rougher mood it's not exactly romantic. You definitely feel his softer side at least in the beginning and after it ends. He'd kiss every little bruise of hickey that hasn't healed yet and murmur about how good you were and how good it felt.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

I don't know if he ever did it much. Like if he was really horny and had no time to go find someone to fuck then sure but other than that he'll wait for an opportunity. When you get together I don't think he would much.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

I don't think there's a clear sub/dom dynamic with Lucien honestly. If anything he's a switch but I think he just wants to fuck and doesn't care for these dynamics.

- Praise kink - He both has a praise kink and loves praising you.

- Exhibitionism - I see it more as it being the risk of being caught that really turns him on so it's more public sex. But I don't think he would mind at all if someone actually watched him fuck you. Still I think he'd definitely bring you to a place where people just watch each other fuck, but only once to see what it's like and then maybe occasionally for fun.

- Thigh fucking - Listen I don't think he's one for punishments and stuff but if you do make him a little mad and he wants to teach you a lesson he won't fuck you and just use your thighs instead. So you can feel him oh so close to where you want him but not getting enough stimulation to get off, just little intentional cruel grazes on your clit every once in a while. If it was nothing too major then he'll still fuck you if you beg him enough.

- Begging - I don't think it's a major kink but he definitely likes hearing you beg when he's in a certain mood. Doesn't draw it out but a couple pleases and whines of his name drive him a little crazy.

- Pegging - I don't know if it's a recurring thing but every once in a while he loves it. Can you imagine the sounds he'd make while you were fucking him with slow but deep thrusts and jacking him off in time with your thrusts. He'd sound so pretty.

- Anal - He'd enjoy doing it with you too. Still don't think it would happen too often but it's definitely something he loves. The memories of you on your back and him fucking into your ass, fingering your pussy at the same time until you're dripping down his balls and can't even remember your name are some of his favorite of all time.

- Overstimulation - Likes making you cum as much as you can take but also enjoys driving the both of you to a point where you can barely take anymore but somehow can't stop moving.

- Somnophilia - He loves waking you with his head between your legs or with his fingers buried in your cunt. Loves when you wake him up the same way as well.

- Cockwarming - He loves having you on his lap or cuddling and loves being inside you so it's a win win situation.

- Marks - Hickeys, bite marks, scratches, etc. He loves all of them. Anything to let people see you're his and he is yours.

- Pain (a little) - I think he likes a little pain with his pleasure so he encourages you to bite and scratch him and pull on his hair. There might be some spanking from either of you but very softly and more in a playful manner.

- Bondage - It's a minor thing but he'd tie up your hands or have you tie up his from time to time, hands is as far as it goes though. I think he'd rather be able to touch you and you touch him. He likes feeling you whether it's soft touches or scratching his back hard enough it bleeds.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Lucien will fuck you anywhere. Favorite place is probably the bedroom or your house in general mostly because it means no interruptions. He'll literally fuck you in an alley or against a random tree in the woods though.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

I think if you asked him for something he would try it with you at least once to make sure and, unless it was something he truly didn't like, he'd keep doing it with you occasionally even if he doesn't love it as much as you. But I don't see him physically hurting you even if you asked. Beron is very abusive so he probably can't hurt you without seeing his father.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Likes both equally. He probably eats you out before fucking you most days unless it's a quickie.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Both. Depends. This feels like a bad answer but I really think Lucien doesn't have a preference per se. When he's in a softer mood he likes fucking you slow and sensually, building your pleasure for hours and until you both are more than satiated and can't stop your legs from shaking. But when he's in a rough mood or in a I-want-you-so-bad-i-need-you-right-now mood he'll fuck you hard and fast. There's also the playful or dirty moods when he's just doing the most filthy things to you but I wouldn't necessarily call them rough.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Loves them. Like I said he'll fuck you anywhere but usually anywhere ends up being kind of a quick thing. He thinks of quickies like little treats before the full meal unless he genuinely doesn't have time and just wanted to feel you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Yeah, he'll try most things at least once. And certain risks do make him a little hard.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He can fuck you for hours.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Once again not sure about toys in the acotar world but if he ever ties you up (or the other way around) he has pretty ropes and cuffs. If we were talking in a modern setting than I just know he's the type to use your vibrator like it's his bestfriend. And going back to the pegging, glass dildos could exist in the acotar world so he definitely has those for you and for him.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

I think it depends on the days. There's always a little teasing with that mouth of his but he gives in with a laugh if you beg on most days. Now when he's in a mood good luck to you. Also enjoys being teased a little.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He's loud. Moans, groans, growls, whines and whimpers - he doesn't care. He's also the definition of talking you through it and always tells you how good everything feels.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

The fastest way to make him cum is pulling on his hair. If you wrap it around your hand and tug he'll let out the most delicious whimper and probably cum if he can't catch himself. If you abuse this fact too much he might tied up your pesky hands though ;)

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

I don't even know about size or girth but Lucien probably has the prettiest dick you've ever seen, I just know deep in my soul. It's also definitely not small at all.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

High, especially with you.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

You both fall asleep at the same time or just depending on who's more tired. He's not waiting on you to fall asleep or anything.

[wonijinjin]

SEVENTEEN MEMBERS AS… (PART 1)

author’s note: this has been sitting in my drafts for a month now, please recommend me categories because this is so fun

word count: 1.0k | genre: humour/crack | warnings: none

seventeen as fruits:

- cheol: a cherry, i don’t think this came as a surprise to anyone, cherries shine the brighest when not alone, and they are always in the best shape, so appealing to everyone

- jeonghan: grapefruit, not everyone likes it because it can be sour and trick the person who eats it, but the ones who appreciate it get the most amazing and complex experience

- joshua: strawberry, which is known for being honey sweet and gentle on the taste buds, but often not enough in small doses to show people it is better than the other fruits

- jun: lemon, another one which is either loved or really disliked, even though it is the foundation to so many things and an essential for daily life

- hoshi: raspberry, again a common favourite, often looked over by being basic, but it still is full of surprises and goes with everything

- wonwoo: banana, a true silent energiser without really making people stop to appreciate it because they are so used to it, even though it is a life saver at times

- woozi: peaches, this type of fruit has so many variations, but always brings the expected from it, tasty, sweet and soft if left to ripen for enough time

- dk: pineapple, although its surface doesn’t seem like so, it is so sweet which makes everyone happy as soon as they get a taste from it, another fan favourite for sure

- mingyu: watermelon, honestly it is probably the most liked one since it is very refreshing, but considered to be nothing more than that, even though it is precious from the inside aswell

- minghao: kiwi, it is such a unique one, which is often misunderstood and criticised, but just like a grapefruit it is so beneficial for its consumers

- seungkwan: tangerines of course, everybody loves them, they are pretty popular, but sometimes because they are so common people forget how nutritious they are

- vernon: pear, the less known sibling of apples, and just like peaches if left to ripen for enough time so so delicious, worth the wait to get into

- dino: grapes, adorable and fun to look at, so fresh with so many pieces to them, out of which every single one hides a bit different taste than the previous

seventeen as colors

- cheol: mocha brown, it radiates the vibe of order and an organised and disciplined soul with a strong will, and he is an incredibly powerful person

- jeonghan: pearl white, it is such a perfect match since it is the color of innocence, and well how can you say that this man isn’t an angel

- joshua: beige, not harsh but rather soft and calming, a very reassuring color imo, which goes so well with so many things and makes everything look majestic and royal like he does

-jun: magenta purple, it is a mix, the best of both worlds, the perfect balance of tints, and this man’s personality is literally that perfect balance

- hoshi: tiger orange, it is quite understandable imo, a bold color with a strong aura to it, knowing its power, place and rank, like how he knows he is the best

- wonwoo: a really deep eggplant purple, it is a very intellectual color just like him, hiding so many hidden things behind, reminding me of the self-awareness he has

- woozi: ruby red, not just because of his solo but because of the fact that he is solid and has his grounded personality and nature like a good wine red

- dk: golden yellow, he is just such a sunshine this was canon, and reminds me of the sun and his warm smile whenever he is happy

- mingyu: scarlet red, again kinda canon, he owns that color, it radiates confidence, and a bold, revealing elegance which he both has at the same time

- minghao: castleton green, it is just so natural for him, like a gentle touch saying everything will be alright, deep and hypnotising

- seungkwan: sapphire blue, it is bright but in a subtle way, and can outshine so many other colors with purely its beautiful tone just like his pure raw talent

- vernon: indigo, very strong and noticeable color, but it still isn’t black, it has a bit of a playfulness with that touch of purple just like him

- dino: lavender grey, just soft and light as a feather, full of so many possibilities to deepen with different tints if needed, like how varied he is

seventeen as seasons

- spring: joshua, seungkwan, jun

these cuties are so so fresh like a breath of new air during spring when the flowers and trees are blooming and the birds are chirping even when the sun is barely above the horizon, and like a sip of fresh cool water during the afternoon in spring

- summer: hoshi, dk, mingyu, dino

these cuties shine so bright like the sun when midday hits, their pure caring kind personality is like the warm rays of sunshine and like the sand which is heated up comfortably when you put your leg into it

- autumn: minghao, vernon, wonwoo

these cuties are warm like a hug and calm and perfect like the rain and clear skies in october, comforting like a tea inside with the soft sounds of raindrops falling from the dark sky to create the circle of balnce

- winter: cheol, jeonghan, woozi

these cuties are pure and innocent like the snow that just dropped to the ground creating a thin layer of white fluffy blanket over everything to embrace it in a breathtaking coat, everything about them is unique like a snowflake

[faejilly]

so I wanted to riff off of @alexanderlightweight's response to the Alec/Bow/Quiver/summoning meta post by @ralfstrashcan that I reblogged recently, but also I didn't want it to get lost in an increasingly long reblog chain, so I'm gonna quote and start over here:

100%

my headcanon is that it's alec's shadowhunter ability like clary's rune ability and apparently the herondale ghost talking ability(??)

if we really want to take it a step further. we can even talk about how izzy has specially made weapons that have to be super tricky to use which means weapons ability

but that's just my brain. which made that one scene where alec goes back to the institute make no sense, to retrieve his bow because literally every other time he doesn't need to (they just wanted to give clace the training moment and set up the whole hodge thing)

1: I also think Alec's 'have to go get a bow' is just an excuse, but he's using it to a) get away from Jace behaving incomprehensibly & Clary being So Very Clary, AND b) to cover their tracks now that he's realized just HOW comprehensively his siblings are going to go off the rails in the next day or so. (And on a narrative level I really like the scene with Hodge so I'm glad it exists. 😅)

2: I headcanon that part of the reason Alec (& to a lesser extent but still noticeably so, Izzy) can get away with pushing so many Clave/Nephilim boundaries without actually getting deruned despite their parents being on Thin Fucking Ice™️ with well, everyone, is that they have inherited both Family Traits and that's valuable enough (especially after all the losses during and after the Uprising) that the Clave really really doesn't want to get rid of them.

(Similarly, there's some hope that Jace and/or his expected children might show signs of the Wayland traits coming to life again as they've died out otherwise. Obviously that goes a bit sideways once they finally pick up on How Very Herondale he is, but luckily he's Herondale so that's still a benefit.)

Truebloods: very literally truth-tellers. Variations on their skills include the ability to recognize lies, off the charts charisma when they are invoking what they believe to be the truth, and an ability to make the most awkward truths palatable to audiences that normally wouldn't want to engage with them. They were traditionally the guardians of the Soul Sword whenever it left the City of Bones, but that honor faded away over the years as the Council with the Consul/Inquisitor as heads centralized power in their own hands.

Izzy can be seen doing this during her trial, because even when her personal behavior has included digs & microaggressions against Downworlders, she believes that they as a people can and should do better and her speech clearly works in-universe because of that resonance of truth.

(She even occasionally manages the sincere/heart-felt clunky dialogue that works despite being clunky that Alec's so good at, and poor Jace doesn't, despite his best attempts, because for all he's a Lightwood in every other way that matters, he's not actually part Trueblood.)

Maryse has several hints of Alec's same blunt (inexplicably successful) sincerity once she lets herself stop hiding behind Politics & Expectations. When she's upset with Izzy about spending time with the Seelie in s1, she has a line that always felt very self-recriminating to me; (I'm paraphrasing here since I'm too lazy to pull up the script or episode): 'never trust a people who can't lie, they'll find more imaginative ways to stab you in the back'. She knows this about the Seelie because it's what she's always done.

(Alec's shock at his parents being in the Circle can't be because it's against their politics as they've never really tried to behave better. Perhaps it's because it never occurred to him that they could lie that well. Especially his mother, since he has a much better relationship with her than Robert.)

This means that Maryse buying into Valentine's rhetoric was invaluable to him, because she could back him up and help make sure people would fall for it, because she was a Trueblood. Equally, when she turns, that is part of why the Clave lets them back in. Her vow to now toe the party line is completely believable, because she promised on her children... who are also Truebloods.

This also means that their bloodline is one that would not always be popular since they can call out power when it's behaving badly; thus the apparent decline of Trueblood standing in the way that the show refuses to ever really acknowledge it in the present day timeline, and instead talks about Lightwood honor.

(But countered in the way The Clave doesn't move directly against Alec Lightwood, HotI, despite gay and living with a Downworlder, despite how much clear disdain he has for so many of them and their policies. They aren't willing to risk what a Trueblood could do if pushed into active rebellion.)

Lightwoods have a much more palatable martial gift. Their affinity for the adamas in their weapons means they can bond with them, sometimes strongly enough to summon them, manipulate them in the field, adapt them and rune them and enhance them in ways most Shadowhunters can't. (We never see anyone doing anything resembling Alec runing his arrows in s1 after all. What if most of them can't?)

As shown by Izzy in s3 as Weapon's Master, in Alec's ability to beat his parabatai (the supposed best fighter of a generation) when they're sparring with weapons even if he loses once they get to hand-to-hand, Izzy's unique skill with a whip, Alec fighting with everything he gets his hands on, from seraph blades to his signature bow to actual arrows for stabbing. (As seen in everything in ralf's original meta post and delightful fic.)

There's even something in the fact that Izzy was interested in joining the Iron Sisters (which while prestigious also involves even more sacrifice from a people who have to sacrifice a lot already and are thus vital enough that they let Cleophas join despite her past because they needed her) and yet Izzy stayed active duty -- and presumably eventually marriageable.

(I frequently wonder if part of why she chose to make herself as unpalatable as possible for a traditional/political match was a lingering bit of awareness that that was what The Clave most wanted from her, regardless of who she wanted to be.)

ALSO! There has to be a reason that Robert Lightwood was valuable enough to keep even when they got rid of Maryse, a reason the show reiterates Lightwood honor over and over again, a reason he & Maryse got to be co-Heads of an Institute (even if the general fanon that they were more constrained than most Proper Heads does fit what little we see), and we never actually see Robert fighting or sparring, but we are repeatedly told that his children are the best of the best.

But it's seldom mentioned as a compliment, is it? More like an expectation. They're Lightwoods, they have to be the best with their weapons, or what is the point of them? It's just another weight added to Alec's so-called crown, another expectation Izzy has to both flaunt and fight against every day so she can have at least a little bit of herself left to hold onto.

(The one thing Jace is good at, the one bit of the monster his father built that helps; he's as good with a blade as a Lightwood. It's the only thing that gives him hope for redemption, the only thing that gives him enough conviction to ask Alec to be his parabatai and protect his soul from himself.)

[thelawsofdaylight]

There’s so much to enjoy about 1.1.2 but here are some of my favourite things:

The immediate contrast we get between the lavish, detail-ridden, paragraphs-long description of the palace versus barely even a sentence about the hospital. I know we mock Hugo a lot for his digressions but the man DOES know how to be concise! He uses short sentences for effect all the time and this is one of my fave examples because it’s also just very funny in its bluntness.

The Bishop questioning the director of the hospital and saying some variation of ‘I know’ after every response. We saw it in the last chapter as well with how he addresses Napoleon but again, the sheer confidence!! The boldness!! Bishop M does not fuck around!!

“There is some mistake, I tell you; you have my house, and I have yours. Give me back my house” ICONIC ENERGY, ABSOLUTELY UNMATCHED

The Bishop filing absolutely everything under household expenses to the chagrin of Mme Magloire. On that note, the extent to which that house would fall apart without her and Mlle Baptistine because the Bishop is determined to give absolutely everything away (’and still I am cramped with it all!’)

’Expenses of carriage and circuit’ *goes on to list things that have nothing to do with carriage and circuit to the value of 3000 livres* this part always cracks me up there’s just something about the way Hugo writes which is almost tongue-in-cheek during these chapters, especially with the set up beforehand where the rich senator rants about how Bishop M is swindling money he doesn’t need for his own selfish gain. Once again, Les Mis is a comedy!!!!!!

“As there is always more wretchedness below than there is brotherhood above” what a raw line. And we’re only in the second chapter!

Also, whilst we’re here: this is the point!!!! I know we all joke about the ‘the following has no direct bearing on the story’ thing but these first few chapters do such a good job establishing the thesis of the novel. Bishop M is literally the most altruistic guy ever to the point where it borders on parody and there is still more ‘wretchedness’ than he can ever possibly solve as an individual, even just in the small town of Digne, even with donating the majority of his income to the poor and taking the principle of abnegation to the extreme. It feels like Hugo is anticipating criticism to the tune of ‘we don’t need structural change we just need more charity/inidividual change/philanthropy/etc!’ and immediately rejecting that as a solution before the novel even gets properly underway by showing how no amount of selflessness will ever overcome the power of systemic violence. (Also for more on this here is a really good post by @secretmellowblog​ about Bishop M but do be aware it has small spoilers for future chapters if you’re doing a first-time read and want to avoid those!)

In summary:

[lunarsilkscreen]

Rethinking the DC Universe

Most superheroes were created from the process; "Make up random s* and see what sticks". So both Marvel and DC are generally... Well they seem random as all get out with no coherency between ideas; and A LOT of campy ideas that are just so outdated they could be considered queerphobic, sexist, AND racist.

<aside>When these were originally drawn up; it was an attempt to be inclusive. But you know how the overton window goes; as it slides what used to be "progressive" gets used for very unprogressive things.</aside>

What this means is that a lot of the authors don't actually know what audiences enjoy about their media; and so they pair down their content to the "greatest hits" they can repeat, and save the rest for when audiences ask for more.

But generally that "More" is really bad not-thought out rehashing of things that audiences didn't really like. Or audiences liked the concept of the ideas presented, but they cam packaged with all the *really bad ideas*. Because creators aren't certain which bits to keep, and which bits to change.

Because; gotta stay true to the source material or fanboys will get cranky in-between their rounds of Madden.

So without further ado; Kryptonite.

Kryptonite unfortunately isn't the material on Earth from the comics. It was a mineral that was new at the time of the comics, and it was introduced in order to influence readers (YA) to learn their elemental tables.

A lot of the sci-fi is about introducing concepts to younger audiences so that they get interested in *real* science. But it often falls short because the original scientists were closer to carni-folk and further away from being very studious.

So in DC comics; Kryptonite is a mineral that came from Superman's home world: Krypton. The joke was intentional. And then it was given a bunch of different variations and mystical magical powers that affected SuperMan in strange ways.

Honestly--To start; I'd get rid of the moniker "SuperMan". Its whole concept is goofy these days. Unless you want to go to more of a less serious DC, which some people *might* want.

The reason it's silly is because the S on his chest that he used to create his hero name "SuperMan" is actually a "K" in his home world's language and stands for his family crest. Indicating his true name: Kal-el and home planet Krypton.

And his stage name: Super Man.

Now, This moniker comes from the carnival strong man days. That's why it sounds so corny. It's also why he wears the ridiculous get-up. Because that's where it comes from... Even the WWE has better outfits and monikers these days.

Keep his real name "Kryptonian" and have everybody else call him "Super Man". In a way that the audience knows; the crowd calls him that, but he doesn't go by *that* name.

Kryptonite; in order to not confuse children with the real thing. Change the name of this Mystical mineral. I'm not sure what to.

BUT. I have an idea that will link it to Green Lantern.

This stone that can take away Superman's powers? Why can't it be the same rock that powers the lantern corp ring?

And because both come in an array of colors that depict different (but the same) varying effects; this can be used as a plot device.

This balances SuperMan's infinite power by making Green Lantern at least as strong as SuperMan, AND it prevents superman from doubling up on super powers.

This pseudo-science extends to many DC characters as well; like the flash. Who ends up building his own Hadron Collider which he uses as his own personal running track. (And also can contain all the energy he emits).

Why is literally every superhero in DC a literal Super-Genius?

I know why; it's to inspire young audiences to be well rounded individuals. But holy shit if doesn't come off as preppy rich-people worship.

In DC there are several Billionaire Genius' that all become some variant of Batman. This can be streamlined. Instead of introducing them all separately; which is done because; VIEWERS NEED TO KNOW WHICH SUPERHERO CAME FIRST, AND WHICH ONE IS THE 'AAA' MOVIE HERO AND WHICH IS THE B-LIST TV SHOW HERO.

They are all Batman, they all want justice. Perhaps they should just... I don't KNOW form some sort of league where they assist the law with dishing out justice instead of all being super unique brooding vigilantes.

Just a thought.

What this does so far is separate each type of hero into a different "threat category". The Batman's care about street-level crimes; they assist the cops, they take down the corrupt politicians and law enforcement.

The spacemen (green lantern, superman;) they deal with inter-galactic threats.

And heroes like the flash who have a tendency and ability for inter dimensional travel? They deal with inter dimensional threats.

Which gives a better reason why these separate teams don't often intersect, opposite "Well, we've heard of them but *CRIME* IS JUST SO BAD YOU GUYS. otherwise we'd have contacted them by now."

If only crime was so bad in real life that superheroes were just always booked solid because law enforcement can't keep up or do its job properly.

Which is why storylines where the heroes leave the country to some island work so much better than just... The entire city is full of criminals and no matter how many you *send to the hospital* they just keep popping up!

Like it's some sort of simulation.

This idea that every series needs to start with Batman and Superman *and then* Justice League *and then* other superhero teams is silly.

When you could take all of the ideas built over the years and take the best bits to make a whole new thing.

Which would honestly feel more honest to viewers than rebooting every series from its first comic.

In the age of Video Games, this would really give gamers a lot more content to play through, and feel less railroady as well.

It even gives reason for villain teams to exist, or not exist.

Also; Batman should be a detective. He's not a direct combat guy, same with all the other superheroes that are Batman clones. They all have extensive martial arts training, so they all should know; The best victory is when you win without fighting.

Also like... They keep trying to make the *same* exact series with different street-level characters that you really start to see why people stopped enjoying superheroes to begin with.

[snickerdoodlles]

For the author ask thing L and M? ❤️

ooohh choosing violence i see, i approve 😂❤

L. favourite fic of yours?

gonna throw you a curveball here. while i love the question choices, i also don't want to tag someone with a post that's gushing about their story and then in the same breath talk about something i don't like. so! as you all know, i've been into KimChay for A Hot Min, so let's take a min to gush over one of my favorite lil fics that's been around since the beginning of the BOC airing:

reverence is a little collection of KimChay vignettes. it's what i would consider 'old' KimChay fandom because it has a lot of influence from the Filmania kp trailer and novel versions of them, but it still largely reads as Kim and Chay and everything's little snapshots that can be as connected or unconnected as you want to read them (ft the occasional AU chucked in for flavoring). i really like vignettes so it's very happy days for me whenever i feel like dipping my toes back into this fic for a reread 🤗

M. least favourite fic of yours?

i'm not gonna trash talk anyone's fic here, something that's not for me can just be not read by me, and that's that. so! instead i'm gonna call this the continuation of the Kim tea ask, because there was one important take i completely forgot about when answering that question lol:

☕ fic that shit talks WDYS

this includes: every damn fic that had some variation of Chay saying "YOU WERE THE ONE THAT LEFT". tell me you didn't pay attention to the lyrics without telling me you didn't pay attention to the lyrics. Jeff did not pour his blood sweat tears and more into that song for y'all to dismiss it like this. BOC did not completely rework Kim's storyline to include music so that he sung this to Chay as an apology for this. also, similar weird take that goes hand-in-hand with the dismissals: Kim did not """"steal Chay's song"""" -- WDYS is the song they literally worked on together. Kim is helping Chay write it on screen. Kim finishing it as an apology to Chay to explain Why He's Like This is a really good step towards a reconciliation between the two of them actually.

i just. aurgh. it's a fantastic song that is basically the thesis statement of kinnporsche: the series, for all three pairings, and it's just really annoying to see yet another fic ignore all of that to play off the one english line for a cheap shot at Kim. ik a decent chunk of my irritation here is the number of stories vs any story specifically, and it's not like there's ever a limit on how many times a concept will be used, but. ugh. i do not care for it At All.

[fic author asks]