#this is also me just trying to speak official plushies into existence

[suave-hogan]

I feel like the Twuppets would be a good blueprint for actual TWRP plushies

[kaiser-s-bitch]

hi, i read your hcs for nagi earlier and i finally got the courage to request something too! :) can i get sfw and nsfw hcs with bachira? thank you in advance, and keep up the good work!

Oh sweetie, there’s no need to be shy, especially not about sending in an ask!! I promise I don’t bite (or do I-?😏)

Thank you so much for sending in this request, enjoy!!

————————————————————————

Bachira Meguru - fluffy/spicy hcs || 18+ (under cut)

sfw:

• Bachira is absolutely the kind of boyfriend where you would say "He’s not only my partner, he’s also my best friend"

• he’s not someone you would call "romantic", but he is just very affectionate in general and will constantly give you little gifts and trinkets (ex.: a plushy that reminded him of you)

• if you go to the beach together, he will come running to you with a new shell that he just found every few minutes; he will absolutely insist on taking all of them back home, he’s a collector (not only of shells, also just of the most random things ever)

• he’s overall a very giving partner and doesn’t expect anything in return, he honestly just loves making you smile and being able to laugh with you

• it’s very important to him that you get along well with his mom, which is honestly not hard at all because she’s an absolute sweetheart (when you first met her she was like "Nice to meet the future Mrs. Bachira!")

• the lock screen on his phone is probably a picture of you drooling in your sleep or something of that sort; he is, however, open to negotiations - you could definitely convince him to take a cute picture of the two of you instead (only if it’s silly enough, everything has to be silly with Bachira)

• he definitely sets that drooly pic as his home screen instead though

• speaking of, his social media is FILLED with pictures of you and him (and pics of just you); he only has one account, his official one, but he uses it like a spam account because he genuinely dgaf - and that’s beside the fact that he just thinks you’re absolutely perfect and wants everyone to see

• it has occurred multiple times that you had to practically beg for him to take a picture down because you think you look absolutely horrendous in it, so now he SOMETIMES asks you first before he uploads anything (you had to give him an actual checklist of things to watch out for that are a no-go, selfies with your sleeping form are one of them)

• Bachira is extremely laid-back because he has full faith in you and your relationship, so jealousy is nothing that would ever even come up from his side

• on the flip side, it’s better if you are not on the jealous side either because Bachira is just extremely friendly and pretty touchy with basically everyone

• he has absolutely no shame and "personal space" is a term that simply does not exist in his vocabulary, neither with you nor with anyone else, so if you value your personal space from time to time, you’re gonna have to be very explicit about it and explain it to him

• he’ll TRY to respect it but I feel like he literally just doesn’t know any boundaries, like, this man would not bat an eye when you’re sitting on the toilet; he would barge in, do what he came to do, wish you good luck and walk back out💀👋🏼 (he strikes me as the type that wouldn’t even close the door behind him iabfosbfls)

• I am convinced that Bachira watches old kid shows from time to time, mainly because they remind him of his childhood, but opposed to back then, he now has someone to watch them with🥺 (pls that’s so sad but so wholesome)

• does the grabby hands whenever he wants cuddles/a hug, his eyes practically staring into your soul and making it impossible to deny him - he’s a very physical person, so expect LOTS of random hugs and cuddles, both at home and in public

~~~

nsfw:

• this man is freaky and NEEDY - can and will go whenever and wherever without hesitation

• he is definitely not against sex in (semi-)public places, in fact, he might actually prefer that over doing it at home - he’s kinda an exhibitionist and no one can convince me otherwise

• he’s utterly in love with you and your body, he literally loves everything about you and he’s not afraid to show it in every way he can; mainly in the form of praising and showing you off

• Bachira has absolutely no shame WHATSOEVER, actually, he definitely has the fantasy of doing it in front of a webcam at least once; he also casually offered some of his teammates to watch the two of you going at it before (they thought it was a joke except for Otoya and probably Lavinho tbh, they wanted to take him up on it)

• ok but hear me out… GOING LATE NIGHT SKINNY DIPPING WITH BACHIRA. that’s it, just think about it.

• his favorite thing ever is pleasuring you with his fingers; eating you out is a close second, but nothing beats watching your facial expressions up close when he’s working you to ecstasy

• he’s not into edging at all, but he’s extremely into overstimulation - both on you and on himself, so the good news is you won’t have to beg him to let you cum, the bad news is you might have to beg him to stop LOL

• you don’t know how the man does it, but he somehow does not slow down at all even after reaching his own climax, and he just keeps going until his body can literally take no more; you better match his libido cause both his stamina and energy are fucking crazy, bro’s a monster (lol)

• Bachira would oftentimes wake you up in the middle of the night because he’s horny - well, he’d keep grinding himself against you for some relief, you waking up is honestly just a matter of time cause he’s not exactly holding back

• on the contrary, he will keep whispering to you all the while, moaning shamelessly into your ear "Mmmh I really really need you baby… Gonna help me take care of this, aren’t you? Ohhh, my good girl…"

• he genuinely adores the way your body reacts to his touches even when asleep, it gives him some kind of kick, even more so when he manages to build up your orgasm without you being fully conscious - though if you’ve made it this far without waking up, he’ll definitely be waking you up now for the grand finale

• he’s a big fan of finishing together; it’s like the ultimate bonding experience for him, and he’s naturally incredibly good at managing both of your pleasure to time your climaxes perfectly

• his favorite positions are basically all positions that allow him to see your face and to let his hands roam freely all over your body (aka he’s not a fan of positions that require him to hold you in place)

• after sex, he usually just wants to cuddle up to you (preferably still naked), rubbing his face against yours affectionately with a happy grin to make you giggle before settling in for a little (or big) nap

[screampied]

i had an idea of a talk show between you and me, called “two horny bitches telling each other exactly” and i imagined you with fairy lights all over your body (vegas) and me with, hm, extremely amount of while liquid hiding my face. moving along.

hiii vegas. today i had a busy day, went to work, washed the kitchen because my dog killed a pigeon (he had a funeral, by the way) and i posted something on my profile. it’s been days since i did this, and i’m scared, but my friends here were hyping me up, cute. i really like them.

ok, so officially i am a squirtling!!!! for once in my life.

RIGHT? he always looked weird to me, i couldn’t see pass the gambling and parental issues, but when he came through megumi’s domain in shibuya i was hooked, i was bamboozled, there was nothing in this world that could stop me from the head i was trying to give that man. by the way, after our little chats about him, i got pretty inspired and added him on my work that i posted today. so it will be my little secret that for him to be there it was inspired by you.

no, vegas, the worm isn’t cute!! i could only relate and tolerate that when it called geto mommy. i hate worms and stuff, but i love snakes. small snakes, because if they are too big i’ll fucking die on the spot. i once held a corn snake, and it’s my dream to have once since then, her name would probably be seraphina. no names for males.

well, you can always experiment it. life kinda sucks when you wait for the right moment, you know? i would be your biggest supporter if you randomly decided to wear glittery suits and sing abba all day because that’s funny. you know i have so many regrets with that, waiting, i mean. i lost many chances, so don’t do that. dress how you want!!

do it again!! vegas saying “welcome to vegas” special tickets for your suite to dearest toji and his worm goes to the garbage, please. maybe toji wouldn’t get well in vegas…actually, thinking about it.

time does get by quick, but it’s really cute. one year and many more, please. and yes, i’ll try to put your print on the cake, i think i’ll be funny and cute.

ALSO, WHY VASELINE?

i would probably not bring anything because i am petrified of zombies, so i would just, you know, stop existing. specially tlof zombies, ain’t no way my messy ass is surviving the clickers. zombieland? maybe, because they can be slow, but on the second movie they’ve had a “glow up” (forgot the world) and i would, again, stop existing.

question for today is how many languages do you speak or would like to speak?

nut anon.

HEYYOU 🫵

bye this is so cute stop sign me up. hehe me with fairy lights kekw.

hiiiii lovieee. omg you have a dog? what breed? A PIGEON ????? i remember my dog caught a mouse it his mouth and tried to give it to me like it was a toy pls i screamed. i love dogs 🙂‍↕️. AWWW GOOD FOR U N UR FRIENDS. as you should !!!!!

real omg. tbh the broke jokes are getting old. they’ve been old, but it is kinda funny sometimes. i only call him broke sometimes bc im his wife (ahaha) but in my mind toji’s always rich with pockets swollen 🤗. RESAAALLY I INSPIRED YOU ???? ough ur edging me i wish i could read it but unfortunately i have to wait until oct. 1st to know who you are ….. which is in like ….. twenty days

stop wormyguro is adorable :((((. i wanna squish it so bad. i saw a plushie for the worm on amazon and im so tempted to by it bye. IT LOOKS SO SOFT. pls when it called geto mommy i cried 😭 geto’s face always kills me. SNAKESSSS I LOVE SNAKES. i used to have one named pork chop, he was a kingsnake ough i miss him. seraphina’s such a pretty name !!!!!!

LMAOOODONT TEMPT ME OMG. not the worm going to the garbage that’s so mean :((((. bye imagine toji in vegas that’s actually hilarious.

vaseline bc i don’t want chapped lips while im trying to survive ✋🏽 also vaseline can help with ermmmm wounds yes. gotta stay cute even while on the brink of death ya know

i speak four languages !!! 💓🙂‍↕️ lingala, french, papiamento and kiswahili—english too now, so i guess that would be fiveeee.

[blueprint-han]

plushies — bang chan.

pairing — chan x (fem) reader

genre — fluff.

word count — 2 K

warnings — reader is obsessed with plushies <3

note — this idea is credited to @orphic-chan !! I have her permission to use it, so mei I hope you like this :"( and that I did it justice <333 🥺 I'm fond of this blurb xkxjxjjdjdjdjdjd

“Hey look!”

Your face lights up with the pure joy of a child as you run towards the store, gazing through the glass with heightened excitement. Your husband grins at you, walking to where you’re standing and staring at the display case. 

“What is it, princess?”

You ignore the blush that creeps up to your cheeks when you hear that nickname, focusing on the cute wolf plushie that’s sitting neatly on the case. It’s tiny paws hold a heart, although you don’t need to focus on those details — you were sold the moment you’d seen the plushie from far away.

“Can we get that, please please please please please-” You pout with pleading eyes, jumping in your place from excitement. Chan laughs, reaching out to ruffle your hair before shaking his head.

“Don’t you have to wolfchan plushie already?”

“Yeah but… look at this — there can never be enough plushies that can remind me of you, you know.”

“But at this rate, our whole bedroom’s gonna be filled with plushies.” Chan gives you a thoughtful smile. “How many do you have right now — twelve?”

“Fourteen.” You frown sarcastically. “But that’s not the point! It’s so cute, I want it, pleaseeeeee…”

“Y/N, how many plushies, out of the fourteen, do you actually sleep with?”

Your expression droops down, as you’re hit with realisation. You’ve had an obsession for plushies ever since you were little, and that attraction had surely carried into adulthood as well. You couldn’t help it. They were so soft and comfortable to cuddle with — you’d bought most of the fourteen plushies when Chan was away slaving at JYP, and you missed his cuddles dearly. A little Versace Eros and a wolf chan plushie did wonders to your cuddle-deprived soul, to be honest.

It hasn’t even been a year since you and Chan had tied the knot and made it official — but nevertheless, you’ve been enjoying your marriage. Calling Bang Chan your “husband” surely induced a feeling of butterflies fluttering around in your gut — it didn’t help when Chan would call you his wife, his princess, and all those cute nicknames from time to time either. 

“Hey, but why do I need a plushie when I have the actual wolf chan beside me, am I right?” You lean in as though to whisper a secret into his ear, and Chan does the same, though he’s internally giggling at how cute you’re being right now. “Plus, don’t tell wolfchan, but your cuddles are better.” you whisper softly, as though not wanting the wolf plushie to hear you.

Chan bursts into a fit of giggles at that, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and squeezing you into a protective hug. “You’re so precious.”

“So can we get the plushie now? Chan squints at your insistence, shaking his head before leaning down to lift you into his arms bridal style — invoking a squeal from you. You tightly grip onto his jacket, eyes going wide as you scan the crowd around you. Thankfully, no one seems to be bothered by Chan’s public display of affection and he starts walking with you clinging onto him.

“I- Are… are you gonna carry me all the way home?” You feel flustered, even though such incidents are more than common in the many years you’ve been with Chan. He was pretty outward and outgoing, never really shying away from doing something to show you just how much he cherished you. He also secretly loves seeing you get surprised and flustered when he did something like what he’s doing right now.

“As long as my hands can take it.” Chan shrugs, shooting you a gentle, pretty smile that takes your breath away before walking home with you in his arms.

The next week, you pull him out of his studio for a break after missing him for too long, and he readily obliges, following in pursuit as you take him to your favorite diner.

“It’s been a while since we’ve eaten here.” Chan says.

“Yeah, can’t wait to eat those waffles again.” You chirp, before turning towards him and putting on a mockingly serious expression. “And you mister husband, are going to eat as much as you can — and no coffee.”

Chan frowns and pouts at you. “But princess-”

“No- no princess. Look at you. You have such dark eyebags again, and you’ve gotten so pale.”

Chan sighs, feeling a warm feeling flow up his chest when you quiz his hand you’re holding in yours gently. “Okay, fine. As long as you’re happy.” 

“Hey!” You slap his arm playfully, and Chan’s jaw drops as he giggles along with you. “What was that for?” he asks.

“I didn’t let you be this adorable and sweet right now.”

“I don’t need any permission, remember? I’m your husband, I can make you shy whenever I want.”

You make a defeated face at him, opting to grab the menu cards to hide the heat that’s spreading all over your face. 

“By the way, isn’t that my hoodie?”

“It’s my hoodie.” you say as a matter-of-fact, flipping through the pages to see what you could order. The pasta looked delicious—

Chan sighs, reaching over to hold your hand before lifting it up, pointing at the way the sleeves reached up to your knuckles and covered your hand almost completely. You simply smirk at his implication.

“Really?” He asks.

“Well, it was your hoodie. It’s mine now.” You say, sipping some water before realising what you meant. “Uh, um.. Only if you’re comfortable though-”

“Hey, hey.” Chan beams at you, the grip on your hand growing tighter. “I really don’t mind. Plus, you look really cute. But I have to admit, I thought the whole stealing-my-boyfriend’s-hoodies-phase would be over once we were married.”

“Well, it will never, for you. Your hoodies are cozy, plus, they smell like you.”

“Gosh, you’re so adorable.”

“No you are! Look at you — your beautiful brown eyes, your perfect face, your beauty, your smile that always makes me melt, your-”

Chan giggles and covers his face with his palms at the sudden overdose of compliments, feeling his skin burn red. You smile cheekily in victory, pulling his hands away from his face to look at how pretty he was when he was complimented. It was truly a sight to cherish.

“See, I was right. You’re so adorable.”

“Nooooo…” Chan speaks in his tiny voice — the voice that usually comes out when he’s extremely flustered, and only comes out around you. He pats his cheeks to feel how warm they’ve gotten and huffs, glaring at you frivolously. It’s his turn to grab the menu card placed on the side of the table, using it to cover his blush.

“Awhhh, you’re so cuteeee.” You squeal silently, feeling your heart jump out of your chest at the sight in front of you. Your husband being this way was rare, considering his busy schedule most of the time, but whenever he got like this, you always felt like you’d faint from how cute he really was.

“Stoppp,” He dreamily twinkles at the back of the menu card, trying to keep a straight face when you force him to put it down, but failing miserably.

“I’m gonna do this a lot more often if this is the result.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Why don’t you order, hm? I’m hungry.”

“Changing the subject… I wouldn’t allow it usually but since you said you’re hungry I’ll let you get away with it- but hey, I’ve been meaning to ask, what’s that bag for?”

Chan hums, turning to finally remind himself of the bag that sits beside him. “You’ll see.” He winks at you, and you squint, letting it brush off before calling for the waiter to order. Was it a gift for you? You’re delving too deep into it, if he told you that you’d see, than you trust your husband enough to know that you would.

Once your dinner is completely done, you groan in satisfaction. “That pasta was so good.”

“So was that piccata. It’s been a long time since I’ve had something other than packaged ramen and rice. Thank you for bringing me here my love, I really appreciate it.”

“Awh, don’t thank me. I’m here to remind you to take breaks from time to time, you know.” You smile sweetly, cupping his cheek from across the table, and if it weren't for the table obstructing you, you’d have placed a delicate kiss on his lips too. The bustling noise of the diner is fairly irrelevant to you — but that’s the beauty of being with your husband. When he’s there, you seem to be caged in another reality, another dimension where only the two of you exist, and only the two of you enjoy each other’s company.

“I have to. You take such good care of me.” He turns his head to place a soft, lingering kiss onto your palm, and you can’t help but smile brighter (if that’s even possible). 

“I only do what I have to, and want to, love. You’ll never have to thank me, because I love you.”

Chan can feel himself blushing again and that, and you coo at the way he averts his eyes down to hide his flustered expression. “Hey, you’re doing that again.”

“Well, didn’t we already finish eating?”

“Yeah, but…” Chan can’t stop smiling, and his heart can’t stop feeling like it’s gonna disintegrate into a thousand butterflies any second. He then looks around, trying to avoid your eyesight and almost certain that you’d be looking at him with that i-made-you-shy-smirk, and his eyes land on the bag beside him. “Hey, I have something for you.”

“For me?” You clutch your chest at the gesture, feeling your insides warm up at the thought of him getting you something for his meet with you after many days. “Awh, you didn’t have to, love.”

Chan chuckles, raising an eyebrow at you. “Pretty sure you’re gonna take that back once you see what’s inside.” He says that to build your excitement, and then hands you the bag, which you happily accept. You close your eyes for a split second to take in how happy, and how calm you feel right now, like everything is in place — and then open the bag to see what’s inside.

And when you see it, everything inside you short circuits. 

“Omo, nooo, are you serious?” You pull out the tiny wolf plushie out of the bag. It’s the same as the one you’d seen on your last date (and the one Chan had refused to buy you), except smaller, and therefore, cuter. You gently place your index finger on the wolf’s nose, cooing at how adorable it looked. “Tinie… it’s so small oh lord.” 

Chan can’t help but twinkle at how excited you are, especially with such a small gift. Really, he just reminded himself to wake up early and go to the shop the day after that date, and enquired to see if there was a smaller version available. Just that small gift having the ability to induce so much happiness in you, and just one smile from you having the capability to throw him off the edge and make his stomach flutter with a thousand butterflies, at that point, Chan knows he loves you.

“B-but, didn’t you not want to buy this?”

“You seemed to really like it, and besides, who am I to deny spoiling my wife?”

You make a cringy pout at him, and successfully make Chan laugh from your expression. “Hey, now you’re doing that thing where you make me blush.” You cuddle the plushie close to your chest, rocking it back and forth and relishing how small yet soft it felt against you. You then pull away to tug at the heart it holds in front of it. “Wolf Chan has all of my heart.” You say, smiling to yourself in pure bliss.

“All of it?”

You raise an eyebrow. “Okay fine, my cute husband has most of it.”

“Hey, I wanted to be the one to have your heart!” He frowns and mimics your pout.

You snort at that, leaning forward as though to whisper something to your husband, and just like the last date, Chan leans in to listen to you.

“Well, don’t tell wolfchan… but you have all of my heart.”

And after that, your whole room is filled with tiny plushies that your husband spoils you with every time he takes you out on a date.

networks: @inkidz​​ @kpopscape​​ @kdiarynet​​ @fluffyskzclub​​ @destinyverse​​ @skzwritersclub​​ @kwritersworld​​ @lovesick-net​​

taglist: @cafejjunie​​ @sleepylixie​​ ​ @coco-riki​​ ​ @stayndays​​ ​ @yutassecretheaven​​ ​ @lost-midnight-flower​​ ​ @p2q3r4​​ @anskiie​​ ​ @happiestgirlontheeastcoast @cuddlychrisbang @orphic-chan​

[ready-to-obeyme]

[OM!] Angel!AU Demon Brother as Your Guardian Angel

Scenario: Residing as angels in the Celestial Realm, the brothers have been assigned to watch over you to guide and protect you. How they do so is up to their discretion. (And if they fall in love with you, well...)

Note: gender neutral headcanons; if i had to choose a timeline, satan exists but belphie doesnt hate humans yet and lilith is alive 🤪, the boys retained their personalities that we all know and love -- it really just be them with guardian angel duties--- bonus angel is Lilith ;)

inspiration from [link] and their other angel!au videos (they’re all adults in this post btw) and [link] (yes just this post; apparently my guardian angel Lucifer is in awe of me... for being dumb as FUCK--)

--

Lucifer

a little affronted he has to take time to look after a human as a seraph but doesn't vocalize it as much since it's direct orders from his father

isn't one to directly intervene in your life much because he doesn't see the need to nor does he want to; a little haughty ngl about being an angel and you being a human

there is no guideline to being a guardian angel and making sure you don’t die before your time is his Main Priority 

he's not going to stop you from eating a whole family sized Dorito bag by yourself or from staying awake till 4am-- those bad decisions are on YOU

finds a little pleasure from seeing the consequences of your actions for a while, but eventually just judges you for everything you do

"why aren't you studying? isn't the midterm tomorrow?"

"when was the last time this human ate?"

"why are you dating that person?"

grumbles over you and your life choices, but is now just actually concerned and hoping you'll be able to make better choices for your own health and happiness; he is now officially Invested as Guardian Angel, don’t you dare laugh at him Michael

if he does utilize his powers to influence you, it comes in subtle hints-- the wind blowing in your hair so you look a certain direction, a sudden bright light to wake you up so you sleep properly in a bed and not a desk... maybe appearing in your room for just a moment to place a blanket over your shoulders

realizes he has… feelings when you perform a good deed or grow as a person and he feels immensely proud and happy for you; has to really keep himself in check to not intervene in your life in more menial, though still helpful, ways

humbled by your growth and change as you become a better person

finally reveals himself to you (by accident) when he has to physically come and save you from danger and then proceeds to yell at you in anger (read: worry) about safety and doesn’t leave your side

Mammon

similarly to Lucifer, grumbles about having to take time to babysit a human but quickly becomes invested in your life at record speed (typical Mammon)

unnecessarily and excessively worried at times even for things that isn't actually putting you in danger

"WHAT THE HELL HUMAN, LOOK BOTH WAYS BEFORE YOU CROSS THE STREET--"

"NO NO NO, BRING YOUR PEPPER SPRAY WITH YOU! I don't care if you’re just walking to the adjacent apartment, BRING IT!"

eventually just ends up storming down to the human realm and """attempts""" to be subtle

if you placed the spray on the table, you turn and it's in your bag again. weird.

pretty sure you could have done a pretty good paranormal activity video with the weird stuff happening in your life when mammon is not-so-secretly intervening in your life

attempts do not last long because mammon's patience grows thin and he suddenly pops into your life and demand you be more careful

probably meets you by slapping your hand away from buying another random but expensive plushie even though you can barely afford it and you just stare at him like he's crazy as he explains that he's your guardian angel

'My Guardian Angel as My Roommate' becomes the title of your life or alternatively 'My Guardian Angel and I are Both Idiots'

the genre of your life is now officially a rom com

his main excuse for being constantly at your side (and it's NOT because he likes you a lot) is "how else am I gonna be prepared to protect you from anything that wants to hurt you?? you would have died 1000x over without me" which is a lie but it's okay he pays rent

hold his hand and tell him it’s so you don’t get lost and he’ll blush but never let go of your hand

Leviathan

life is a simulation

or rather, your life is

once he gets assigned to you, he observes you for a while-- and it looked like he was going to leave you be for the most part, when one Bad Choice has him popping up right in front of you

he slaps away the tub of ice cream you were gonna binge eat

"human, stop eating that crap! your stats are gonna suffer!!!"

super insistent in telling you to do something that good for you and is pretty stubborn when it comes to decisions that benefit your health and career

"noob, hurry up and level up your intelligence or you're gonna fail your exams"

"is life a game to you"

"yes, and you are losing. but have no fear, I am your walkthrough."

joking aside, Levi is pretty supportive of you, in the way Belphie is to his human-- he just words things in gaming terms like stats, energy, leveling up, exp

did not expect to get gratitude from this gig, but when you express your true appreciation for his care, he doesn't know what to do (starts crying maybe?)

his advice starts veering away from just lifestyle and health but to more human aspects; he offers a listening ear and supportive compliments whenever needed

because it turns out he cares for you a whole lot more than if this was really all just a game to him and ends up caring about your general happiness and is more considerate about your feelings

Finds himself being super casual with you and talking about your favorite show and has to catch himself from speaking so quickly-- can’t have the human thinking he… adores you

Satan

has no qualms with coming to the human realm to watch over you, but is fine with not immediately being a part of your life or intervening as much as Mammon or Belphie

ironically, as a man who was originally never born as an angel, he does his duties in a manner most befitting manner of one

subtly inserts himself into small parts of your life, persisting off small interactions

he's the guy at the counter when you needed to find a book, he's the one who picks up your hydroflask and returns it to the lost and found, he's the one telling you your backpack is open before anything spills out

he doesn't know but you jokingly dub him your guardian angel, even if you don't know who he actually is but never have the courage to speak up-- also mainly because he flits in and out of your life so fast you don’t even have the chance to say “oh, by the way, what’s your name?”

Satan is content with how he is more of a passing moment in your life, so this way you can still live your life the way you want it without much interference from an outside source because he respects your choices and the concept of free will that all humans have

truly believes that the best course of action and his duty as your guardian angel is to see you live your life the way you want to-- and if can help out a little or give you a little nudge in the right way, then that’s fine by him

Prefers to be on the sidelines and watch you become your own person and-- well, it’s a bit hard not getting attached to you when he sees you trip over yourself over someone you like or help someone out with their books when they dropped them

eventually does have to step in in a more meaningful way when you accidentally endanger yourself and he wards it off or catches you before you hurt yourself

at that point it was hard to pretend not being a part of your life when he's helped you so often-- and the fact that you're infatuated with him and asked him out

(he probably doesn't even realize how suave and prince charming he looks lmao)

Asmodeus

chooses to watch over you from above more but doesn't mind just popping down to the human realm just to have some fun at the same event you're in

lives through all your moments with you; laughs when you laugh and cries when you cry and  genuinely enjoys seeing you go through life, living and learning

generally leaves you to your own devices unless there's something really pressing

utterly cannot stop himself from intervening if you have doubts about yourself or if you struggle with self-love

loves appearing in dreams to dish out advice and tell you to love yourself, forgive yourself more, and to seek happiness because you deserve it

you don't remember the dreams exactly, but you do remember the sentiment within it and sometimes the fuzzy image of a beautiful angel you aren't sure you've seen irl but you chalk it up to seeing the face of strangers you’ve seen (which is... technically true)

dreams are his main way of communicating with you, and he also just thinks the mystery and anonymity is kinda exciting-- but sometimes he just spends a lot of your dreams just talking to you and getting to know you more intimately and seeing things from your perspective

sometimes enjoys being in your lucid dreams when you’re pretty aware and you go on some really whacky dream-induced adventure

loves you like no other and truly wishes the best for you

accidentally reveals himself to you during a party where you meet face to face

"I've feel like I've seen you before…"

"Haha, well that's because I've been in your dreams! They were pretty pleasant weren't they?"

you think he’s kidding for a long time-- and honestly he’s not even trying to hide the fact that he’s your Guardian Angel, considering he tells you all the time “Honey, I’m you’re Guardian Angel” or “Of course I’m here for you! I’m your Guardian Angel!” 

but the way he says it makes it feel like that’s just a nickname, not an official TITLE

floored when you actually see his WINGS and turns out you’ve been in love with an actually angel this entire time

Beelzebub

similar to Asmo and Satan, he doesn't really feel the need to insert himself into your life

instead, he's wherever you are… but in the background, eating at a table in a far corner or walking casually across the street from where you are

very inconspicuous and surprisingly good at keeping a distance, whether he intends to or not

he just looks very natural doing whatever he is doing at any time, but often accidentally ends up in the background of a photo or selfie without people noticing

as your Guardian Angel, he watches over you by stopping anyone with ill intent from approaching you... like the obvious ones like mugging and stuff; he wishes he could protect you from bad people too but he respectfully keeps his distance and allows you to make mistakes and grow from it

it infuriates him when people take advantage of your kindness

(though if the person that hurt you emotionally meets Beel in an alley...)

is very taken aback when YOU are the one approaching HIM asking for the time or if you could grab something on the high shelf for you

actually pretty flustered when you do interact with him because he was distracted doing other stuff he never expected you to notice him

Beel is the definition of a Guardian Angel-- a sentinel, standing on guard to protect you from danger and physical harm-- and he does exactly that when the time comes

most likely to save you from something dramatic like a car incoming or a fight

doesn't really understand why you trust him so easily or so wholeheartedly even after he saved you because he thought he would look intimidating

(he did, until you asked him for the time and he spoke with his mouth full of burgers or stammered out a 'you're welcome' when you smiled at him at the library)

Beel doesn't know until much later that he's dubbed as your gentle giant

Belphegor

like some of the others, doesn't like to influence your choices as much-- not because of free will or anything like that, but because he likes humans because of who they are and what they do

(and also he’s too lazy to be hovering around you trying to control your every move anyhow)

and man are humans, especially you, interesting

why is that human drinking from that person's navel? no clue but it looks fun

why is that human consuming whipped cheese with waffles? no idea, but he wouldn't get this much free entertainment without it

has no problems integrating himself into your life as your friend or roommate just to watch everything unfold in person and to tease you for your mildly questionable decisions in life

“Belphie, why didn’t you stop me from eating that last bowl of cereal?”

“Eh, I thought it would be kind of funny.”

isn't one to go out of his way to do something to influence you, but he does encourage you to do the things you want to do, whether they be good or mildly questionable ones-- but especially the fun ones like joining a new club or going to town to have fun (which you do drag him along to every time)

does steer you away from making Bad Decisions like murder or whatever, but he thinks most choices are pretty neutral and does help you process the consequences, both good and bad, of what happened

so he's integrated himself as your friend, offers advice and supports your decisions no matter what, and subtly looks out for you… and he's surprised when one day you confess to him that you like him???

this was NOT part of the plan but he would be lying to himself if he said he didn't end up falling for you too after seeing all sides of you and watching you grow as a person

Lilith

watches more from afar, because as much as she loves humans like Belphie, she is a little shy about meeting you

curiosity does triumph over shyness eventually, and she does surveillance distantly like Beel before winding up being directly in your life like Belphie (siblings am i right)

her brothers would keep trying to give her input on how she should interact with you or guide you but she brushes them away with a huff because she thinks she's doing a fine job thank you very much!

or so she's pretty sure, considering you're hanging out with her, seriously listening to her advice, buying her gifts... cuddling in bed with her if you’re attracted to her

if you do like her and want to date her, she has to be ready to somehow defend you from the only danger in your life, which turns out to be her brothers

if not, you two live happy lives as the best of friends, though the brothers can never be too careful with their darling sister

likes updating about your life to her brothers and they're lowkey jealous

doesn’t actually have to reveal herself as an angel unless you somehow find out... or because Mammon and Lucifer come down and threatens bodily harm if you hurt Lilith (wait, who’s watching over who now??)

hold up this is setting up for exactly what happens in the canon storyline

[tosikoarts]

SFW Alphabet | Nate River

Whew, that was a lot of work!  You can check tosikowrites tag for more! Warning: there’s like 3000+ words under the cut.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

It's hard to understand what's on his mind. His emotionless facial expression, some kind of sluggish movements, mysterious silence do not help matter either. The way Near shows affection is as puzzling since you can’t say exactly how he does it. Do not expect any straightforwardness and stock up on patience.

At first, the only thing he resorts to is rationalization and meeting all needs of the loved one in accordance with the Maslow pyramid. Any desires from chocolate-mint ice cream and a brand new sweater to horseback riding courses and scientific conferences will be met with no questions asked.

Third level of the aforementioned pyramid is the hardest one for Near to comprehend. He is full of respect for loved one and shows it by short but telling complements accompanied with a gentle smile. But showering someone with excessive affection is not his style.

One of his favorite pastimes includes playing Lego games (any games, really) together, building, basically, anything their heart desires. Letting another person touch his belongings is huge sign of trust. If they are not in the mood, Near would like to talk while he builds a house of cards or solves tricky Japanese puzzle box.

While he doesn’t seem like a huge fan of physical affection, Near likes to hold hands even if it’s only by the pinkies. He playfully stokes their palm with his thumb, squeezes their hand and taps it with all of his fingers. When in public Near may stealthily grab loved one by the hand, both showing his love and anchoring himself in the fussy surroundings.

 B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Near is pretty hard to miss in a crowd so acquaintance is preceded by a long time of staring from one or both sides. He is the one to approach person with some kind of question that drags them in a conversation like a quicksand. If he finds an individual interesting, he will find them again.

Talking with him reminds classical Socratic dialogue. Conversation are never the same and tend to last for hours, leaving you with more questions than answers. They may include superficial topics but you always end up in something deep like is the universe infinite or are we living in simulation.

Despite the innocent appearance of a snow-white cloud, Near is a friend that will tell you the truth no matter how harsh it is. The fact of friendship doesn’t justify misdeeds. He would want his best friend to grow in a great person accepting and correcting their mistakes.

Overall friendship with Near is stable, devoid of drama and abrupt changes. He loves being around them since he doesn’t have real friends but also understands if he’s being too much for person to handle.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Likes to cuddle from time to time. When you see him you automatically want to knock Near over and squeeze him in your embrace. Most of the time he is indifferent and will simply surrender to one’s love but sometimes he will take initiative and put his head on person’s shoulder for them to pat. He will lay on them with hos whole body and close the eyes like he is about to fall asleep. Thankfully to his small size (only 5' 1" or 155 cm) he is ideal partner for spooning with Near being small spoon.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Yes and no. Since the burden of being the world’s best detective now is placed on his shoulders, Near’s mind is occupied with thoughts how to succeed in this difficult task. Five, ten, fifteen years have to pass before he considers to settle down. He has little housekeeping skills but eventually gets better at them. When you enter his house, you can immediately notice his passion to arrange things by whether color or material. Cooking skills are non-existence so we won’t talk about it.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Near’s candor is almost painful. His voice is firm, close to official, like he is reading from the paper. Tired gaze is directed somewhere to the side and there’s a pensive look on his face. He deals with it how he would deal with public speaking: first comes introduction, then body, then conclusion. You can’t tell if he cares at all and if it hurts him (spoiler alert: it does!) because of confident pose and restrained tone.

Won’t check on person after the break-up. Near vanishes from their life to ease their plight, not because of ill intend but because of fear to hurt them more. After everything days seem longer and bleaker. For once, he spends a day in the bed, doing absolutely nothing. Near is back in the game after two-three weeks.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Even without signed papers, Near is committed to relationship he ended up in. It takes him around 10 years to consider marriage but he is completely confident in his decision. Proposal is especially important event. If Near can't handle countless tasks on his own, he will find several assistants. Selection of a place, music, menu, even people who will surround them at the moment, has to be approved by him. Thanks to painstaking work, this day will forever remain in their memory as well as in Near’s heart. Behind the mask of calmness there is an intoxicating feeling of joy and happiness.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

More gentle in physical sense than in emotional. Near’s touch is almost weightless, it is warm and soft. He is also a professional in small gestures like, again, holding hands by pinkies, putting head on their shoulder or head (if he can reach it), maybe, nuzzling into their neck. After unraveling a tangled ball of his own feelings, Near starts to share his inner experiences without fear of being misunderstood.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Very, very huggable person, there’s no such thing as bad mood for hugs. The only time he will refuse being caught in someone’s arms is intense brainwork where he becomes inaccessible from outside world. I mean, you can definitely try to embrace him but he will grumble the whole time. Due to lack of experience in relationships, Near doesn’t always feel comfortable to initiate hugs. He does it in, like, 4 times out of 10.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

If he doesn’t mean it, you won’t able to pull this phase out of him even with forceps, and when he does, time has to pass for him to come to a conclusion that is exactly what he feels. Near may need a push from the loved one to say “I love you” in return. Probably, asks a lot of “do you really love me? Are you sure?” after hearing it for the first time. So, yeah, a lot of time, from 2 to 5 years. Pop a champagne and celebrate when it happens tho, because he may hide back into his shell right after.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

To be honest, he is jealous person. Just like a kid who can’t stand seeing his favorite toy in another’s child hands, Near can’t ignore anyone hitting on his loved one. He gets fed up really fast. Coquetry, flirting glances, chatting with implications – that’s a short list of things Near won’t ever tolerate. He is easily hurt and if his loved one wants to try him, they will get cold shoulder with zero explanation. Day passes, then two then tree before Near decides to talk about situation. By the way, if they get offended or upset by his treatment, he will simply shrug his sloping shoulders in disinterest.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Near’s kisses are brief but warm, with a fresh aftertaste like he just got rid of a bubblegum. It’s hard to call him experienced or skilled but he is interested and eager to learn new things. One of his favorites is Eskimo kiss in which he presses his nose against loved one’s nose and rubs it since this is so innocent and amusing. Second favorite, for the same reason, would be cheek pecs.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Either way becomes best friend with a kids while playing with them or sits in the distance and watches them closely to prevent any unpleasant accidents. It is easy for him to entertain children with the huge collection of plushies, constructors, dolls and yadda yadda yadda. If Near found kid especially interesting, he will give them away any toy they pick. Gets tired of constant noise like that and will try to pawn yelling baby off to someone reliable.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

One of the benefits of being an independent detective is ability to plan your day however you want it. Flexible schedule allows Near to choose days for sleep in and have lazy mornings with loved one without worrying about accumulated case information. He probably describes his wild vivid dreams to his loved one with children's delight in the eyes while they are stretching and shaking off drowsiness. Near may ask them to brush his messy hair and even allows them to braid it.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

He doesn’t like to go out no matter how good weather is and how exciting events in the downtown look. If loved one is in the mood he will take them in the hot bubble bath. Shelves in his bathroom are cluttered up with colorful shampoo bottles, different conditioners, hand-made soap, bath bombs and anything one can think off so Near basically entrusts them all to his loved one to take care of this mess on his head. He likes to wrap in the blanket and watch movies together, biographical films preferably. If they insist on going out, Near would pick small coffee shop or any place with nice view and little people.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Obviously, takes it slowly. It seems he reveals facts about himself, at least some details, but the feeling that there’s so much more covered in the shadows never leaves you. Near doesn’t look like your normal common man so naturally he doesn’t have a trivial past. Signal that trust limit is reached is him opening about orphanage, existence of Mello, Matt, and other children. Never talks about his work or anything linked directly to the Death Note though.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Patient just like Matt but in colder manner. Near keeps it together in the most stressful situations where another person would lose their shit completely. When his patience runs thin, he is also the one to throw harsh lines with icy tone. Very calculated, balanced, but not stress free because this stuff still deposits in the subconscious. One fay Near will lose it and world will end for real.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Remembers the most important facts now and then. Remembers they told him about this one specific thing but he can’t tell what the details were. Doesn’t keep any notes and totally relies on memory. Mixes dates and events eventually. Seems like a totally normal person in this regard, nothing more to say.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

First anniversary when his loved one dragged him out of the house to the amusement park! Myriad of colorful blinding lights over the soaring skyward attractions kept blending into one mess in his eyes, overflows of laughter around and constant tings of someone trying to hack the claw machine stunned him but still. With a right person by his side, Near felt on the seventh heaven. After the wild ride on the roller coaster and shared cotton candy, he would give them small present like cute notebook or bunny plush that plays music when you press its small pink paw.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Yeah, Near can’t protect when fight breaks out but he will never allow it to happen in the first place. He suggests the best way to protect yourself in everyday life like cameras, alarm installation, vpn and antivirus, time-tested bank to put your money in etc. If they want personal guard they will get one. If they want self-defense classes they will get them too. Never crosses personal boundaries unlike some other people *cough-cough*.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Near never stops trying to impress his loved one but it looks like he never puts any effort at all. Mostly because his affection finds expression in gifts that person wants and all he has to do is to write a check. In other areas he is casual: his loved one is responsible for dates because Near would suggest something minimally energy consuming. Everyday tasks do not seem to bother him either. He puts more thought into anniversaries, and these are special occasions in which he’d ask them out on a trip or just walk around the city. In fact, his main effort goes into opening up during activities together, establishing trusting relationship, and giving them emotional feedback. It is important for Near to feel encouragement as well to confirm that his efforts did not go to waste.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Typical issues in those who has to work with sophisticated logical chains and predict hundreds steps ahead include overly rationalization. Professional deformation is a scary thing since you can’t control it and the ways it changes your perception of things, your reactions, and personality in general. Thanks to that Near keeps applying his detective knowledge and continuous rationalization that comes with it to everyday situation. It gives him bad look of heartless person with no emotional input in his decisions whatsoever.

Near was a kid with much on his mind, no friends around, probably all up in the fantasies so cliquishness is another of his characteristics. No, he doesn’t want to meet your friends or go outside, there’s too much noise coming from people who don’t know shit, and he also may become needy when you’re away too.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Well, looking at his appearance, long messy hair and one-colored clothes… Near isn’t America’s next top model. He has zero concerns about his reflection in the mirror. His brush is his five fingers. No, ten, Near switches hands from time to time. Sees ironing as waste of time: he will lay around and sit in this weird pose and clothes will crumple again so why bother? And still, all the shirts and pants smell like alpine meadows and sea breeze. How? Who knows.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Depends on the time spent together. If they happen to leave his life by the one year anniversary, Near won’t care that much. He will take time to analyze what happened and draw conclusions from his own behavior. That’s all. If it happens later in the relationship he will become numb. No thoughts, head empty. Why would they do it? He can’t shut down inner dialogue because of continuous flow of cases that need his attention but at the same time he can’t push himself to sort it all out. Near wants to talk one more time to calm down. Decides to stay away from relationships for a… long time.

If they were killed, Near will do his best to find the killer and put them behind the bars. It is the only thing he can think about since the loss felt as insult to their memory.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

If you do not take in consideration his dark eyes, Near fits approximate description of albino. Since synthesis of melanin pigment is disturbed, his skin is extra susceptible to harmful effects of sunlight, and Near has to have regular check-ups with his dermatologist. Not only that, but development of the optical system is highly dependent on the presence of melanin too. His eyesight is poor so he uses lenses during the day and switches to strong bifocal glasses in the evening. You know, those big ass square glasses like Richie Tozier from It had? Near looks like him but dipped in white paint.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Near canonically is a type of person to see the end goal and ignore all obstacles. This machine is unstoppable I can see him as someone who hates insecure people. Those who always hesitate, ask everybody what they think, pull back at the last minute.

Slurping, smacking, gulping, or any other unnecessarily loud mouth noises. If you pop that bubblegum next to him, you’ll receive the dirtiest look in your life. People who can’t chew with their mouth shut are automatically out.

People who are trying to change or shape him for their own benefit. Near will make it very clear he is not going to change for anyone and if person is not okay with that, they can use exit door right there.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

Near is huge night owl so he falls asleep around three a.m. and wakes up when it’s already time for lunch. His sleeping schedule is surprisingly stable in its instability and all alarm clocks on the phone are turned off.

At the same time when difficult case comes up his genius mind takes off the brakes and falling asleep becomes a huge problem. It forces Near to take pills, sometimes potent ones, since harmless melatonin does nothing. In addition to this sleeping anxiety wakes him up every two hours. With head is full of thoughts that keep slipping away he physically can’t get back to sleep.

Near rarely remembers any dreams but when he does they look crazy. Vivid, colorful, dynamic, furthermore when they feel almost real Near catches small things that tell him about dream nature of events and becomes lucid. Sadly, this state doesn’t last more than few seconds and he wakes up.

[tomeandflickcorner]

Episode Review- The Real Ghostbusters: No One Comes to Lupisville

Well, this isn’t officially meant to be a Halloween episode, but given what goes on in this one, I say it’s fitting.

It’s late at night at the Firehouse, and the Ghostbusters are all sound asleep. (And Ray is even shown holding a stuffed Mr. Stay Puft, which may be the same plushie we saw in Look Homeward, Ray).  Downstairs, we see poor Janine is once again being forced to stay up because they apparently can’t be bothered to hire a different secretary for the night shift.  To pass the time, Janine is playing poker with Slimer, who we see has a really great hand.  But then it’s revealed Slimer is a big fat cheater who is hiding cards up his sleeve, so to speak.  When Janine catches him in the act, she is rightfully ticked and starts chasing after him. She quickly loses sight of him, but then notices the front door opening.  Thinking Slimer snuck outside, Janine steps out to locate him, only to see he’s nowhere in sight.  When she turns back to go inside, she sees a rather tall man standing there.  The man tells Janine that he came looking for the Ghostbusters.  Janine tells him that they’re asleep at the moment, but he’s welcome to come back in the morning.  However, the man states he’s not willing to do that and simply gives Janine an address, requesting that the Ghostbusters head there tomorrow after dusk.  To compensate Janine for the trouble, the man gives her a small bag filled with gold coins.  When Janine looks back up, she sees the man has vanished.  She calls out to him, stating she needs a name to place on the invoice.  In response, the man’s disembodied voice announces his name is Gregor.

The next evening, the Ghostbusters head off to the address Gregor gave them.  They discuss how the place they’re going is a town called Lupisville, which is some sort of private community located well off the beaten trail.  They eventually locate the town on the other side of a bridge that spans over a dried-up river.  Upon arriving in Lupisville, they find the town seems to be deserted.  But then people begin emerging from the houses. It’s immediately clear that something is unusual about these people.  Not only are they wearing clothing from a different time period, but some of them are simply gigantic.  As Ray attempts to greet the townsfolk, a rather creepy looking little girl called Lyta appears on the roof of the Ecto-1, and she seems to take an instant shine to Egon.  Peter then asks the townsfolk where Gregor is.  The moment Gregor’s name is uttered, a bolt of lightning appeared in the sky, accompanied by a thunderclap.  Instantly, Gregor appears in the doorway of a nearby house.  He welcomes the Ghostbusters to the town and invites them to come inside.  The Ghostbusters accept the invite, with Lyta sneaking inside with them.  Although, Peter pauses at the door to say Gregor’s name, and another lighting and thunder strike occurs.  (Was that an intentional Young Frankenstein reference?)

Inside Gregor’s house, he reveals the reason why he called the Ghostbusters out there.  Gregor states that Lupisville is being plagued by vampires, and he hopes the Ghostbusters can deal with it.  (Here, we see Lyta is eavesdropping on the conversation from behind a chair.  And she seems to be visibly scared when Gregor mentions the vampire problem.)  Peter, probably thinking this is a huge joke, announces that this isn’t their department and he gets up to leave.  Gregor, however, is offended by this and accuses Peter of being afraid.  Ray, trying to diffuse the situation, steps in and explains that they’ve just never dealt with vampires before.  Egon points out this could be a prime opportunity to test how their equipment could work on the undead.  Winston, on the other hand, seems to be on board with Peter and states it’s probably not a smart move to mess around with something they’re not experienced to deal with.  But he quickly changes his tune when Gregor reveals a large chest of gold, which he intends to offer them as payment for their services.  So the Ghostbusters ultimately agree to take on Lupisville’s vampire problem. Gregor informs the Ghostbusters that the vampires always came through the forest each night at midnight.  Upon looking at the clock on Gregor’s mantle, the Ghostbusters see it was 11:40, so they don’t have much time.

The Ghostbusters head off into the woods.  Unbeknownst to them, Lyta is following them in secret. As they walk, Ray suddenly announces that he heard something.  He asks Egon to check his PKE Meter, in case vampires give off psychokinetic energy. It turns out they do, as Egon quickly determines they’re surrounded.  Upon looking around them, though, they only see a large group of bats.  At first, the Ghostbusters breathe sighs of relief, until they add 2 and 2 together.  Sure enough, the bats transform into vampires.  The vampires proceed to attack the Ghostbusters, who quickly find out the Proton Packs have no effect on them.  Lyta, upon seeing one of the vampires going for Egon, tries to come to his defense.  Of course, she’s only a little girl, so all she can really do is jump on the vampire’s back and hit him with her tiny fists.  Naturally, this doesn’t accomplish anything, and the vampire is able to reach Egon.  In the process, however, the vampire inadvertently hits a switch on Egon’s Proton Pack. Egon identifies it as the self-destruct switch.  Acting quickly, Egon tosses his Proton Pack away.  In the process, he actually manages to flip the vampire over his shoulder. (Wow, Egon is stronger than he looks!) However, he’s not able to get everyone clear in time before the Proton Pack explodes.  When the smoke clears, Lyta sees Egon and Winston lying unconscious nearby.  Peter and Ray, however, are nowhere to be seen.

A little while later, we see Peter and Ray waking up in the middle of a graveyard. As they come around, they see the obvious leader of the vampires sitting atop a nearby gravestone.  The vampire leader introduces himself as Orwell.  Cutting to the chase, Peter and Ray demanded that Orwell reveal what they did to Egon and Winston, who they noticed weren’t with them. Orwell explains that many of his vampires were injured when the Proton Pack exploded.  As such, they could only afford to carry Peter and Ray to safety. Egon and Winston, however, were now in the custody of the other vampires.  Ray voices his confusion as to what Orwell meant by ‘other vampires,’ so Orwell fills in the blanks by explaining that all the vampires in the area were once united under his leadership.  But one day, a faction of them decided they were tired of the old ways, in which they lived underground and kept their existence a secret from the outside world.  The rebellious vampires ended up breaking off from the rest of the group and invaded Lupisville, where they now live under Gregor’s leadership.  Yep, that’s right- Gregor and the rest of the townsfolk are vampires as well. Surprised?  

So basically, this story is about warring clans of vampires, with Orwell’s coven trying to subdue Gregor’s coven and vice versa.  Of course, it’s not entirely clear what exactly they’re fighting about.  Sure, it’s stated that Gregor’s coven has decided to reject the old ways, but what does that entail?  Granted they’re now living in an actual town instead of living underground, but is that it? I suppose it’s possible that Gregor’s coven plan on openly revealing the existence of vampires to the outside world, and Orwell’s coven was working to keep them from doing so, but if that’s the case, it wasn’t made very clear in the actual episode.  In any event, Orwell suggests forming a temporary alliance with Peter and Ray in order to take out Gregor’s coven and save Egon and Winston.

Meanwhile, Winston and Egon wake up inside a dungeon-like basement beneath Gregor’s house.  Gregor comes in to talk with them about how Peter and Ray were captured by the vampires, stating that he and the rest of the townsfolk will be willing to help them wipe the vampires out and save their friends.  But as he’s talking, Egon happens to glance at a nearby mirror and notices Gregor doesn’t have a reflection.  Immediately, he figures it all out, but unfortunately, he failed to be discrete as Gregor noticed his eyes kept darting to the mirror.  Gregor responds by grabbing Egon, though Egon isn’t intimidated.  Instead, he points out that Gregor also refused to come to the Firehouse during the day.  Realizing that the jig is up, Gregor drops the charade and reveals his true nature by sprouting bat-like wings.  He informs Egon and Winston that if they don’t agree to help them wipe out Orwelle’s coven, then they will never leave the town alive.  Gregor and his followers then exit the dungeon, leaving Winston and Egon imprisoned.  However, Lyta had been listening through a barred window nearby.  Once Gregor left, she offered to help Egon and Winston. Egon asks her to bring them one of their remaining Proton Packs, and Lyta obediently hurries off to fetch it. She soon returns with the Proton Pack and passes it over to Winston.  She urges them to get out of there quickly, before Gregor’s coven can do to them what they did to ‘the others.’  Winston proceeds to use the Proton Pack to escape from their cell, but when they exit the basement, Egon sees Lyta is still lurking nearby.  So he asks her what she meant by ‘the others.’ He surmises that Lyta meant the people who lived in the town before Gregor’s coven took over.  Egon urges her to lead him and Winston to them.  At first, Lyta says she can’t as she’s Gregor’s servant and he will do something to her if she helps them.  But she then spontaneously changes her tune without any provocation, leaving me to wonder if they skipped a line or two.  Still, Lyta asks Egon to promise to take her with them when they leave. Egon tells her she has his word that they’ll do so.

Back in the woods, Peter and Ray are accompanying Orwell’s coven towards Lupisville for the final showdown.  As they walk, Peter points out an unsettling observation to Ray.  If Orwell wants to make sure nobody in the outside world finds out about the existence of vampires, what guarantee do they have that they’ll let the Ghostbusters leave?  Still, Ray comes up with the idea of reprograming his Proton Pack so it would stimulate the spectrum of sunlight, suggesting that would help them fight against the vampires of Gregor’s coven.  Orwell seems pleased by this plan, but threatens to kill Peter if Ray double crossed him by attacking one of his vampires.

We then return to Egon, Winston and Lyta.  Lyta has led Egon and Winston to a deeper part of the dungeon-like basement, where they find a large group of people behind bars.  One of the prisoners, whose name is Clintock according the Ghostbusters wiki, instructs Egon and Winston to get them out of there.  Egon agrees to free them, stating that they have to get out of town as soon as the cage doors are opened.  However, Clintock stops Egon, asking if it’s nighttime, and if so, if there’s a full moon outside.  Winston, upon hearing this question, is instantly frustrated.  He complains that they have vampires everywhere, but this man wants a weather report.  Still, he informs Clintock that there is indeed a full moon outside, and asks why that matters.  In response, Clintock simply tells Egon and Winston to get them out of their cells and to where they can see the sky.  They’ll take care of themselves after that.  After sharing a bemused look, Egon and Winston comply, opening up the cage doors with a blast from Winston’s Proton Pack.

Outside, the battle between Orwell and Gregor’s covens has already begun.  And thanks to Ray’s reprogramed Proton Pack, it seems Orwell’s coven has the upper hand, as Ray can effectively vaporize Gregor’s vampires.  Although, Gregor’s vampires quickly get the jump on them, preventing Ray from wiping out any more of them.  However, the fighting is interrupted when the escaped villagers arrive on the scene.  Clintock confronts Gregor, declaring that he kept them prisoners in their own town and denied them the moon.  Now it’s time for him to pay the price.

As Clintock speaks, the camera pans up to the full moon.  And the sound of a wolf howl can be heard. Upon hearing the wolf howl, Ray is shocked by the revelation of what this means, and he verbally berates himself for not realizing it sooner.  He reminds Peter that the name of the town is Lupisville.  And Lupis is Latin for wolf.  Meaning the town was a town full of werewolves.

As Ray makes this conclusion, Clintock and the other villagers begin transforming into wolves.  Upon transforming, the werewolves begin attacking the vampires.  As the fighting continues, Egon and Winston reunite with Peter and Ray, with Egon declaring they have to get out of there before things get worse.  The others ask what he means by that, but Egon refuses to explain until they’re actually driving away.  Once they’re doing so, Egon explains the obvious paradox.  When a vampire bites someone, that person becomes a vampire. The same holds true for werewolves. So, what happens when a vampire bites a werewolf and vice versa?  As this conundrum sinks in, we see one of the vampires transform into a werewolf as another werewolf sprouts wings.  Still, the Ghostbusters continue to drive off, refusing to stick around to see who wins the fight.  And when they come to the bridge they crossed earlier, they briefly stop the Ecto-1 in order to destroy the dam that’s holding back the water so the dried-up river fills up again.  After all, vampires, according to the traditional lore, cannot cross running water. So, with the river flowing once again, the vampires are effectively trapped within the town.

Once that’s out of the way, the Ghostbusters continue to drive back to the city.  As they leave Lupisville behind, Peter announces that, even though they didn’t get paid, they can consider it a job well-done.  Egon, however, states they didn’t leave completely empty-handed.  As he says this, it’s revealed that Lyta hitched a ride on the back of the Ecto-1.

Well, that was an interesting episode!  Vampires and werewolves?  Whodathunk we’d see that in a show about ghosts?  Though I am wondering what happened after the Ghostbusters drove off.  Did Clintock’s werewolves team up with Orwell’s coven, on account of how they were both opposed to Gregor’s coven, or were the werewolves unable to tell the two factions apart?  And with vampires turning into werewolves and werewolves turning into vampires, would this result in each group unknowingly turning on each other? I guess we’ll never really know. Although that’s not the only question without an answer.  What exactly was Lyta?  I know the episode said she was Gregor’s servant, but was she an ordinary human, one of Orwell’s vampires taken prisoner or one of the werewolves?  I guess the third option the most logical answer.  After all, there was a brief moment when the werewolves were transforming when we saw an adult werewolf that seemed to resemble Lyta. Meaning that might have been Lyta’s mother.  But if Lyta’s parents were alive, why would Lyta want to leave?  And if she was a werewolf, wouldn’t she have transformed into a wolf alongside the other werewolves?  (Unless young werewolves can’t transform until they’re older.  I guess that’s possible.)  Of course, that also leaves the question of what became of her when the Ghostbusters got back to the Firehouse.  Did she wind up in an orphanage somewhere?  Considering we never see this little girl again, it’s never addressed.

(Click here for more Ghostbusters reviews)

[rukakikuchi]

LOONAverse timeline theory - Breakdown (Part 1, continued)

Alright, continuing where we left off, it’s time to shift our focus away from Earth and move to Eden for a moment.

Yves’ rebellion

Yves is a resident of Eden, a world that is meant to be an ideal utopia. But Yves herself has begun to question her faith in whether this so-called “perfect” life she has is what she wants.

In Eden, she doesn’t have the freedom to express her true self. She wants to go somewhere where she isn’t restricted by someone else’s rules and do what she wants.

So she finds and eats the Forbidden Fruit, an apple, which has the power to grant wishes in Eden, and wishes for a way to leave Eden.

Her wish creates a special doorway which allows her to leave Eden and travel to Earth. 

On Earth, she can cut ties with her past self, the person she pretended to be in Eden, and be who she truly is.

(In her solo video, we see her literally cutting tags with her name.)

Now the question is, where is this doorway?

The forest. The forest that is connected to all three planes in the Moebius; the same forest Yeojin got lost in.

Yves grabbed a frog plushie in the claw machine, which is Yeojin’s representative animal.

This means that the one who lured Yeojin into the forest she got lost in was actually Yves.

But that begs the question, why did Yves do that in the first place?

We’ll talk about that in a bit.

Also, I’ve seen most people say that the next plushie she picks up is an owl, but... To me, it looks more like a penguin, at least, in my opinion. The penguin is Chuu’s representative animal, and we know that Chuu admires Yves. And Yves knows that. 

So perhaps this foreshadows when Yves’ influence starts to “grab hold” of the other girls in Eden (Chuu, Gowon, and Olivia), and eventually drives them to leave Eden.

(Update: It was actually shown on LOONA TV to be an owl, so this kinda debunks that part of the theory. 😅 But I plan on talking about what my thoughts are now that I do know it's actually an owl, so look forward to that.)

But I’m getting ahead of myself. (lol)

So what happens next?

Human ViVi’s death

While on Earth, Yves meets ViVi (who is human at this time) in a roller skating rink/bowling alley. And they both have a good time, this genuine connection between them starting to emerge.

However, Yves still has a problem. Her escape from Eden, at the moment, is only temporary. And she knows that she can’t stay outside of Eden forever. Not yet, anyways.

She has to go back, but she makes a promise to ViVi that they will meet again.

However, after they parted ways, ViVi is killed by Olivia, who found her and killed her out of her resentment towards Yves.

How she got there when Yves only just recently fell from Eden is a topic for next chapter.

Unaware of this, Yves meets someone else on Earth.

Choerry?

Well... Yes and no. This is Choerry, but not exactly the same Choerry. Something about her seems different compared to her appearance in the first half of “Love Cherry Motion”.

I know that sounds a little confusing, but I’ll explain what I mean in a later chapter.

In any case, Yves can sense that this girl is able travel to the different planes. And this means, she can help her achieve her goal.

Before returning to Eden, Yves leaves Choerry here with a favor for her to fulfill when she needs it; to help her leave Eden. This time, permanently.

(Okay, I literally just thought of this, but maybe this green tunnel we see in the "Starlight" Cinema Theory clip where Yves and Choerry meet, which is the same tunnel we see Yves walking through in some scenes of "new", is actually supposed to represent the doorway through the forest into the other planes. 😲 Again, this just shows how complex the lore of the LOONAverse is.)

Christmas time and Yeojin’s disappearance

Heejin, Hyunjin, and Haseul are celebrating Christmas together. 

While shopping for Christmas presents and waiting to meet Heejin and Hyunjin, Haseul finds Chuu, after she had eaten the Forbidden Fruit to be with Yves and passed out.

Chuu wakes up, not noticing Haseul, and leaves.

While this is going on, Yves starts her first idea in how to escape from Eden. Similar to what happened to Choerry and Hyunjin, she tries to lure someone from Earth to Eden and switch places with them.

But things don’t go as she plans, because Yeojin ends up getting lost in the forest, and stuck between worlds. And I don’t think this was Yves’ intention.

Remember “My Melody”?

Haseul’s shirt has Yves’ color, burgundy. And Yeojin’s has peach, which is Chuu’s color.

I believe Yves was actually trying to lure Haseul into the forest to switch places with her, but ended up attracting Yeojin instead and she failed to reach Eden and got lost.

In fact, both Haseul and Yeojin have some interesting parallels to Yves and Chuu.

Chuu admires Yves, similar to a childish crush, and we know that Yeojin views Haseul as a mother or big sister figure. Chuu and Yeojin both look up to someone close to them.

There seems to also be parallels between Chuu and Yeojin’s respective solo MVs that many have pointed out already.

Not to mention...

In the choreography version of “Kiss Later”, doesn’t Yeojin’s outfit here resemble a strawberry, Chuu’s representative fruit?

There’s clearly some sort of connection here.

So now, Yeojin is missing, and Haseul is affected deeply by her sudden, mysterious disappearance. She tries to go in search for answers as to what happened to her.

While on her search, she comes across what appears to be another version of herself.

This person is a version of Haseul that exists deep inside her heart; they are her shadow. But she has trouble facing it, especially now that Yeojin is gone. She’s scared of facing this other side of herself.

Here, her fight or flight reflexes kick in. Because she’s so focused on finding out the truth about Yeojin’s disappearance, she chooses to reject that other part of herself deep inside her heart, shooting a diamond towards it.

But when she goes to look...

She instead finds a white bird, now dead.

The ice in Haseul’s heart begins to melt, much like the winter snow, and now she’s filled with deep remorse for what she has done.

Again, let’s talk about some of the parallels between Yves and Haseul.

Aside from the fact that their representative animals are both white birds, they are both shown to cut ties with a part of themselves.

For Yves, she chose to reject her past self, as well as the version of herself she pretends to be in Eden, in order to be her true self. This choice was made after she began to question her faith and think for herself and what she truly wants.

But in Haseul’s case, she seems to reject her shadow/deep part of her heart without fully thinking it through. Because she’s so focused on finding Yeojin, she wasn’t thinking clearly, even if she thought she was.

Now that we’ve established that, time to move on.

ViVi’s rebirth and freeing Jinsoul

ViVi is now reborn, as an android girl living in Hong Kong. Some of her memories are missing or have been warped due to her transformation into an android, such as how she died and her meeting with Yves.

One day, she finds Jinsoul, who was trapped in a basement, and frees her.

Because she was trapped for so long, she doesn’t remember who she is (possibly a side effect due to half of Olivia’s heart being inside her?), where she came from, or about her Odd Eye powers. But she knows that she needs to “return home”.

Now let’s go back to “My Sunday” again.

So, how exactly are Heejin and Hyunjin connected to Jinsoul and ViVi?

First, let’s examine Hyunjin’s parallels with ViVi.

Hyunjin was originally from the Cosmos, and had an Odd Eye, meaning she wasn’t a normal human. But after she came to Earth, she lost her Odd Eye powers and her memories, becoming a normal girl.

Meanwhile, ViVi was a normal girl who was killed and turned into an android, and some of her memories as a human are now messed up. We even see in “Love & Live” that ViVi has an “Odd Eye” of her own.

They both went through similar transformations: Hyunjin became a normal girl, while ViVi became an android.

Now, what about Heejin? What’s her connection to Jinsoul?

The answer is actually rather simple... It’s Olivia.

Heejin already has a connection to Olivia because she sensed when she killed ViVi. And going by the reverse order theory, Heejin and Olivia are believed to be mirror counterparts, just like how Hyunjin and Choerry are.

But now, because Jinsoul “swallowed” half of Olivia’s heart, this means Heejin now has a deeper connection to Jinsoul.

The “sin of swallowing the sun” is a recurring line that’s connected to Jinsoul.

Singing in the Rain:

Guilty of swallowing the sun in the afternoon I’m right here, heated up

Egoist:

Hey, for the sin of swallowing you You get bigger and bigger, beautiful you

And guess what Heejin’s first lines were in “Love & Live”.

You get larger in my heart each day My heart grows hotter, like I’m hugging the sun

(^This is the translation in the official music video, but one of the alternate translations that I found translated it as “My heart becomes so hot, like it swallowed the sun”.)

Oh yeah! And also, there’s a special version of Jinsoul’s “Singing in the Rain” music video... where Heejin does the rap!

(Side note though, it was originally supposed to be Kim Lip doing the rap, but Heejin and Haseul also recorded their own version {See LOONA TV #159}, and Heejin’s version ended up being the one that got released, but I still think it holds significance.)

And speaking of “Singing in the Rain”, it’s possible that something else Jinsoul and Heejin might share is the desire to spread color to their world.

Remember the colors Heejin sings of in “ViViD”?

Red, orange, yellow, green...

That always bugged me ever since I first watched the video! I thought, what about blue and purple? Because green can’t be made without blue, so where is it?

It’s Jinsoul.

We see her spreading her blue throughout “Singing in the Rain”.

And again, much of her lyrics connect to her and her color.

I used to be untouchable and dangerous But in one moment, your blue wraps around me

For the sin of swallowing up all the stars in the sky You spread your blue

The air is getting wet from the rain (Getting colored) Hey, the sun inside of us is getting colored, now

Jinsoul’s rain doesn’t just rejuvenate life in the Cosmos. It spreads her color blue, and creates purple when combined with red, Kim Lip’s color.

We’ll talk more about Olivia’s parallels to Heejin, Jinsoul’s reawakening, and “Singing in the rain” in the next coming chapters.

And with that said, that’s the end of Chapter 1! We’ll continue to talk about the meeting and formation of LOONA 1/3 in a later chapter, because in Chapter 2, will be bringing more of Eden’s story to the forefront!

[awol-newt]

welp.

do you ever wonder why the fuck some people can deposit checks for $164k and not blink? money doesn’t buy happiness but it sure makes being happy a lot easier when you aren’t thinking about bills.

sometimes people suck. a woman asked if knew how to copy something so i could help one of the bankers out. somebody asked why i couldn’t remember her name despite me only seeing her once every couple months and never really talking-talking and actually having a million other clients. somebody said, i don’t think a teller can help me. i need to see somebody with a desk. (sure. let me grab my tablet. my desk is the one in the corner with the plant, a picture of me with my girlfriend and cat, and all the desk toys. i’ll be right over.) another person said, i’ll ask the manager [about an obscure online banking thing that even i now little about but have given you my 98% sure answer] instead.

friends. i’m rambling and ranting to you because i am sad and have terrible coping mechanisms. but also because i want to complain about my job.

i work at a large financial institution. i have worked there for 14 months. the district manager didn’t want to hire me but my manager fought for me. in those fourteen months i have:

earned two certifications, one in anti-money laundering and bank secrecy act compliance and one in fraud prevention. two certifications not required for my role.

had my transaction authority (how much cash i can give out or how large of checks i can write without consulting somebody else with a higher authority) increased from $2,500 to $50,000

given wire transfer authority (huuuuge risk if you fuck up)

given official backup management authority by my manager and market operations (compliance) analyst

more or less filled the role of assistant manager (a role which no longer exists across the board)

volunteered to join a specific group of people dedicated to reaching out to clients for at least three hours a week

invited to a special counsel to provide thoughtful questions and advice to my district manager

asked to join the committee to help plan the company’s 2020 participation in pride

nominated to travel to another state to help open new locations because of my dedication and knowledge of company resources and professional development

told by the regional manager to stay in touch throughout my career after following up with a role-related meeting (see fifty or sixty some people where i was memorable)

impressed pretty much everybody who i’ve ever worked with

i still am paid at the lower end of my possible pay scale. i am still considered the entry level position despite having privileges that folks with five years of experience don’t have. i am the person that several private wealth (investable assets greater than $100k) turn to when they need something because i am efficient and competent.

i sent an international wire transfer today. we usually ask for 45 minutes to an hour to allot towards the process because there are a lot of steps. my client asked how long it would take and i said i could have her free before her next appointment in forty minutes. what i didn’t tell her is that i am confident in my ability to do an international wire in 25 minutes or less. i sent the wire. then we had time for me to figure out how to fix her paypal account linked to the bank.

she said she would come back to me next time she needed help.

she isn’t the only person.

i have a great manager inasmuch as she trusts me to do my own thing and gives me the time to work on my development if i ask for it. she is terrible at coaching. kind of terrible at advocating for me. she’s the manager who will be a good friend after i exit my current position whenever that may be.

i have an incompetent white man who should have retired five years ago as my colleague. he clings to old systems and old guidelines and for the life of him can never remember how to do anything or figure out anything on his own despite having nineteen years tenure more than me. it takes him two hours to send an international wire and he still makes mistakes.

i am trying to remove myself from a customer-facing role. i’ve been a top contender for roles to which i’ve applied internally. i have had recruiters at other institutions reach out to me. i have a mentor who advocates for me for requisitions that require several more years of official experience than i possess.

but i am still stuck. i’m stuck in a way that makes me feel like my life is in limbo even though i am ready to try to begin the next stage with the person i love, which is on hold for a number of reasons.

my life felt like it was imploding two years ago and then i found tumblr and fandom and friends again. there was support and stability in my life again. i got a job with insurance so i didn’t have to pay $400 for the medications that were keeping me from drowning. i met my person. i stopped having as many down days and started feeling productive and accomplished again and like i wasn’t the complete failure i felt like when i withdrew from my phd program.

i really, really fucking wanted this job in denver. not just because of the 50% pay increase but because it was a chance to start laying down roots in a place that could be long-term home. a place where i might actually begin to build a family of my own. the possibility signaled the light at the end of the tunnel for my ldr. a chance for me to prove and show so much more professionally and personally.

i was devastated. i am devastated. not necessarily because i didn’t get the position but because of what getting that position could have offered. might have promised.

and now shit’s just fucked and i’m stressed because Life.

my job is pissing me off. my handful of clients that know me, who only want to work with me, are my job’s saving grace. helping them (and other people who don’t yell at me) is why i find my job bearable even if i want to jump off a cliff every time my ancient colleague speaks or somebody assumes he knows more than me because he’s an old white guy in a suit rather than me, a baby-faced, non-binary queer who has tattoos but still wears ties to work.

i am just tired.

i am tired, friends.

and now i guess i am going to curl up in bed with my plushie baby stitch and play hooky through tomorrow because i am stressed and sleep deprived and sad and tired.

sorry to dump. and sorry to all the folks out there who have it worse than me. fwp.

sorry. all the sorry’s.

[gothmingguk]

Stan Language | Masked Love pt.1

Jung Hoseok x Make-upArtist!Reader

Words: 2.3k

Genre: Fluff, slight Angst?

Warnings: bad writing? I don’t know tell me if there are things I should warn about.

A/N: everything in cursive is supposed to be said in Korean.

Masterlist | Writing List | next

You weren't sure why you said yes when Bang PD, CEO of BigHit asked you to be one of BTS' on tour makeup and hair artists. Sure, you could use the money and you would tour around the world, but first of all you couldn't really speak Korean, only a few phrases, so it was hard to talk to BTS or in that case anyone in the staff. But what you didn't know was that Hitman actually wanted someone young and English speaking so the boys would improve their English. Second, you definitely weren't planning on falling in love. But here you were now, watching the 7 chaotic boys you've become friends with walking around stage, rehearsing for their second show in Canada. You were only with them for 9 shows but since you stayed around them all the time for those 17 days you were on tour with them already, they started liking you and talking to you even if it was hard sometimes. You've also already seen them drunk which was funny even though you couldn't really talk to them since their ability to talk English was gone. The only one you could still kinda talk to was Namjoon but he was also wasted so it was more of a mix between English and Korean.

You and Jimin were on a couch backstage, his head in your lap, his Chimmy plushie on his lap. You were teaching him some English phrases, trying as hard as possible to make him understand. The boys finished rehearsal half an hour before that, Taehyung and Jeongguk went out to explore the city a little, Jin and the Rapline were walking around the venue.

You were surprised that you were even allowed to be near the boys when you weren't working, since you haven't seen any other staff, except for the managers and directors, close to them in their free time. But it was part of Bangs plan, the guys need someone outside of Korea who isn't famous, someone they can rely on.

You were jokingly teaching Jimin ‚stan' language like „the tea is hot today" and „you snatched my wig". You were cracking up everytime someone came in and Jimin threw one of those phrases at them.

„Joonie hyung! The tea is hot today!"

You were laying on the floor laughing while Namjoon just looked confused. „Y/N, were you teaching him that?" You nodded while still laughing hysterically.

He just shook his head muttering “You are idiots.”

„I understood that you called us idiots.", you called after Namjoon who just walked away.

Jin also walked trough the room, his RJ plushie in his arms. „Jin Hyung! You're a skinny legend."

You were cracking up again, Jin just walked away ignoring Jimin. „You should stop annoying your hyungs Jiminie."

Yoongi also came in after a while, you and Jimin were talking about dancing, but Jimin wasn't even able to say a letter to him. Yoongi looked Jimin dead in the eyes, Said “Don’t." and laid down on the couch next to you and Jimin. “Let’s take a nap.”, you told Jimin who nodded.

After a while you woke up because of some noise. It was Hoseok searching for something. You smiled at him rubbing your eyes. Jimin was still sleeping, his face buried in your tummy. Hoseok looked at you, then at Jimin and then he almost ran away. You were confused, did you do anything? You honestly didn't know.

You were doing Namjoons makeup, you switched between them every day, sometimes you had time to do two of them, sometimes only one. It depended.

"Did I do something to Hoseok? Everytime I try to talk to him or when Jimin is with me he walks away."

Namjoon sighed. "He can get very shy around- forget it. Maybe you should ask him yourself." He gave you a dimpled smile. It didn't take long to finish his makeup since you only did a little eyeshadow, almost none, on him. You did his hair just a little bit, you already did it before they went out and he didn't really mess it up.

Hoseok was the only member left who hadn't his makeup done. He was sleeping on a makeup chair, Jeongguk was ruffling and petting his hair.

You were quietly talking to him while applying primer on Hoseoks face.

"Why are you doing that?" You asked him. "Hobi Hyung likes that. His mother do that when he was little."

You smiled at him, that was really cute.

As soon as Kookie just removed his hand from Hoseoks Head he slightly moaned, searching for Kookies Hand to get it back onto his head. You were chuckling every time the maknae teased the older man or actually tried to go away.

You finished his makeup after a while, Jungkook looked annoyed.

"You can go Kook, I have to do his hair anyways."

Hoseok was half asleep, which meant he didn't notice you getting into Jungkooks place, he thought it was still the youngest.

You stopped doing his hair in search for hair spray.

"Don’t stop please."

"I'm sorry Hope, but I don't understand what you’re saying." You told him while getting the spray out of your bag. He opened his eyes rapidly as soon as he heard your voice, clearly embarrassed.

He stammered since he didn't know what to say. He got shy around you, in his eyes you were the prettiest woman he had ever seen in his life. But he thought you had a thing for Jimin since you were the same age and you hung out a lot. What he didn't know was that you had a little crush on him. Nothing really serious, it was just his personality that made you fall for him a little. But you knew that you weren't allowed to be in love with one of them, being friends was already over the line. At least that's what you thought, but BigHit actually couldn't care less as long as it keeps being private.

You heard Namjoon chuckling, he was clearly watching, enjoying himself. "He asked if you could keep doing that." He grinned at both of you and then disappeared. You smiled at the man in front of you, even though he couldn't see it, and did his hair again. He sighed relaxing into your touch, he just loved it when someone was scratching his scalp and the fact that it was you made it even better.

"Hoseok you have to get out there the show starts soon." He pouted a little, but he obeyed smiling at you. You kept your eyes on him until he was out of the room, sighing. You couldn't fall in love with him, you worked for him. You watched the show from the backstage, you had to be ready to fix their makeup. They played the first 4 songs before they ran off the stage towards you. "God I'm so sweaty, I'm sorry." Namjoon said that almost every show, you just rolled your eyes at him. "I get money for touching and fixing you sweaty messes so it's okay." Hoseok rushed towards you he had his solo so you needed to fix his makeup. You put a little translucent powder on his face, after that you just fixed his hair and sent him away. While Hoseok was performing you fixed Jungkooks makeup and then the other boys, Kookie had his solo right after Hobi. They all went on stage again for 2 songs. Now it was Jimins turn, you did his makeup, put a little darker eyeshadow on his eyes to match his clothes and fixed his blonde hair. He quickly gave you a hug and ran towards stage. You caught hoseoks eye, he looked pissed. You patted away Namjoons sweat and redid his makeup all in the span of 4 minutes while Jimin was performing. Namjoon always wiped away his makeup on his sleeves so you had to redo it. You complimented Jungkook on his solo while doing his hair. The younger boy smiled at you. "Thank you Noona. But my voice... it cracked. I was not that good today."

You assured him that he was amazing, which made him smile like crazy.

You also complimented Hoseok on his solo, he just said a little thanks, so you didn't push further.

They played another two songs together, after that you fixed Taehyungs Make-up while his VCR was playing. You just put powder on the other boys faces while Tae was performing Singularity. You sadly never had the time to admire the solo songs because you obviously had to work. They all went out on stage again to perform fake love. Yoongi came running towards you, it was his time to perform his solo. You put a little red eyeshadow onto his lash line and fixed his base. He thanked you before he went to change. You took your time to do Jins makeup, even though he really didn't need it. Let's be real none of them does. While Jin was out you again fixed the bases of whoever needed it. They played until the encore which you watched, since you loved the Mic Drop dance break. There were three songs left, you, which meant the whole makeup crew quickly fixed everyone's makeup before wishing them luck, your job was officially done for the day. You were of course still around them in case you needed to help one of them take off their makeup or if they wanted to go out, so you could redo their makeup. You watched the rest of the performance on the monitor while packing your makeup. You loved their performances, they were better than any western performance you've seen before. And they were a lot kinder than those western artists.

You and the other people of the makeup team went out of the hall before the other staff, it would be to hectic and chaotic. Jimin searched for you as he did the last days, he grew attached to you like a lost puppy. "Has anyone seen Y/N?”

Someone told him that you were probably already at the hotel, so he just sighed and waited until he and his brothers would drive to the hotel. Hoseok of course heard it, he got jealous. It was normal that you were friends with the boys, but he didn't like how clingy Jimin was. Everytime he gathered the courage to talk to you Jimin was already there talking to you, joking around and sometimes even cuddling. Maybe it was because you were both born in 95 or because Jimin was the first, after Namjoon, who approached you and the first who really got to know you. But to his defense, he was stunned because of your looks, he loved everything about the way you just existed. And as soon as he got even a glimpse of your personality, he was swoon over. His hyungs noticed it. But that didn't mean they fully understood that he had a crush on you. If Jimin would have understood it, he wouldn't keep being this close to you, he would never hurt his hyung on purpose.

When they arrived at the hotel, you were already in your room, passed out. The last two days were the most exhausting so far and you know the next would be too. Maybe it was the arena, maybe it was the fact that you never toured with 7 more or less energetic men that didn't have the same mothertounge as you. Or maybe it was just the work itself, you honestly didn't know.

The boys always had a card or a key to your room, okay Namjoon had but if they wanted to visit you they just asked him for it. You honestly didn't mind. You loved the company of the boys, they weren't judging you and you weren't seeing them as bangtan, the biggest Boyband in the world, you saw them how they were. Dorky men, more like boys in men's bodys, who were a family, having lots of love for Music and each other.

Jimin of course wanted to visit you, he did almost every day, he was like a little child. But since he had no reason to, Namjoon told him that you needed your space. He didn't know you were asleep, he thought you just had a little too much of the boys, so you weren't joining them.

Hoseok on the other hand had a reason, your phone. You left it in the venue and he actually found it, keeping it a secret from the others. That was his chance to talk to you without the others near them.

He asked Namjoon for the keycard, explaining the situation. Namjoon and Yoongi were the only ones knowing fully about his little crush, he told them. Namjoon gave him second keycard, which made him smile a cute little dimple smile, which you would have cooed at if you were there. He was hesitant to knock on your door, he didn't want to annoy you. But he did eventually and after the 5th time he knocked, he just let himself in. It actually worried him that you didn't answer. You were on your bed, work clothes still on, blanket on the floor. He had literal heart eyes looking at you. Your phone, almost forgotten in his pocket, was now on your table, you probably would have searched for it in the morning. The next thing he did was taking of your shoes, you even had them still on. The blanket that you threw out of the bed was now on your body, you looked tiny in his eyes. He stroked your hair, before smiling fondly at you and exiting the room right after. He was so hopelessly in love.

[askruby-vocaloid]

(How long am I allowed to make this answer? A short essay’s length? Ok)

First, it was cool user-supported characters that allowed people to make cool animations and songs that I liked. They’re fun to doodle in my notebooks during class.

Now, today as one of the (well, anonymous) creators, Vocaloid is a channel and the theme of each end product I make through my hobbies, whether it be drawing, sewing, coding, composing, or anything else I end up getting my hands on. Vocaloid has turned into a means of finding a community of other people who like the characters it portrays and others who enjoy creating with the characters and has helped me develop better communication skills because of my want to discuss with others. Vocaloid has also been a target for me to learn to channel my emotions.

(Utau is also along those lines, but it feels more personal bc the voice provider is usually active online so it feels off when I try to embrace them in the same way as Vocaloid)

I honestly can’t figure out how fans of games are able to draw and dream up different stories about cartoon/ anime/ game characters; that’s the dev’s jobs and they give you the content, plus it’s official! Thus, I applaud you self-motivated people who can make their own content. I used to draw and sew Pokemon a lot because they’re cute, but I play some other new apps and I can’t bring myself to make any content with them because I end up satisfied with just playing the game. Same thing with anime, CCS is cool and I enjoy watching it (along with a few others) but it’s rather satisfying just to watch and I end up content with its contents. However, when it comes to Vocaloid, there is little to no official content. The official creators might make stuff and release a CD or two and merch if they’re active, but there’s nothing else to follow. To fully enjoy the content, you have to be a part of the movement creating, whether it be cosplaying or making songs or drawing the characters. The idea completely drew me in. I like doodling in my notebooks. Then I should level up and draw with a tablet so I can show the Twitter people. I like playing my violin. Then I can make covers of songs and show the Youtube people. I like sewing. Then I should sew the characters so people who want it (for there is a lack of official merch) can exchange something they created for the plushie. I can even code things for the Vocaloid software itself, I don’t think most games or anime allow that! Since anything I could want to do is supported by the Vocaloid software or one of the end goals of it, I feel that I am a part of something awesomely powerful when I direct my hobbies toward Vocaloid.

Vocaloid is also the one of two themes of the communities I am an active part of online (plushies are the other theme). There’s something sparkley about finally being able to talk to people on twitter after a few months with my not-as-confident- because-I-haven’t-talked-to-strangers-in-Japanese and realizing that I’m speaking ok when I asked the strangers (now friends). It’s also comforting to know that people know what an Oliver is or a Ruby is because nobody irl knows what meaning they have for me. In addition, getting to work with and talk with people to collaborate on a lot of songs starting from similar interests and similar desires has been great experiences that I hope don’t end any time soon. Each of these different steps have helped me to become increasingly confident in my communication abilities, which haven’t existed outside of English class until around the time I started internetting. (Until I started to use the internet I didn’t talk to people to the point that my classmates were convinced that I didn’t have a voice.)

One other thing Vocaloid is to me is a way that I learn to control emotions. This is in the perfect tense, so I’ve been learning, I am learning, and I will be learning are all valid statements. The first song I heard and knew was Vocaloid is Melt, and that song basically shoots an arrow into your heart as a little person who has a crush >< More one-sided love songs, and I guess today, I’ve made one (1) one-sided love song and also a vent song. I’m learning to vent well. Vent. Venting’s proved to be easier in Japanese, I hope I can have my Yukari sing more songs, both for venting and not venting. I hope that as I continue to vent/ find songs, I learn to better control my feelings and act like a better human.

In conclusion, Vocaloid has been a great theme for my hobbies and communities. It has let me discover ways for controlling my smol emotions. I don’t want to decrease my enjoyment of Vocaloid any time soon, and I hope that you enjoyed reading. And thus, this is a 2 page essay about what Vocaloid is to me.

[valkerymillenia]

Omg there's so much I want to talk about in TLJ that I don't even know where to start!

And my ships 😏 hehe I see what the authors are doing.

Red herrings everywhere.

Spoilers ahead.

These are random disjointed fangirlish thoughts on the movie that I have to spill out before I can become coherent again. Bare with me.

THE HUMOUR! So good and yet so well nuanced that it complemented the seriousness of the  movie very well.

GENERAL HUGS and SALT GUY need to be memes. I mean, c’mon guys, you know I’m right.

LEIA USING THE FORCE TO SAVE HERSELF, IN THE VACUUM OF SPACE! My gods, she always had so much potential and it’s good to see some of it finally being expressed. They built Leia up so well in this movie, so much development, I love it but now I’m so afraid of what they’ll do for ep IX without Carrie...

Billie Lourd having way more protagonism! The legacy continues.

WOMEN EVERYWHERE!  As many as the men and in equal posts! Thank you, gods! Also, POC everywhere! YES, THANK YOU!

Rose is freaking adorable and well written, the viewers form an instant connection with her through her sister and she has that innocent and wonder that we haven’t had since New Hope’s Luke.

Though Rose describing Canto Bight made me laugh because it was a perfect echo of Obi-Wan describing Mos Isley... In fact when she described it as an ugly horrifying place filled with the most despicable people, all I could think was ‘girl, you’ve clearly never been to Mos Isley’. Though in the end Canto Bight is more civilized but morally worse than Mos Isley so she’s not wrong.

Still wondering was the message Rey asked Chewie to give Finn...

Shipping wise... They're baiting us with Finn x Rose AND Finn x Poe AND Finn x Rey all at once. Interesting to see the guy being the center of a love tangle for a change. Anyway, they are clearly letting the audience chose how to interpret each relationship.

Now, I’m trying to analyze this without shipper goggles (yet) so...

Poe's body language is all over Finn who seems clueless, Poe just acts so differently around Finn compared to others, hell, he even acts possessive of Finn (the way he examines all of ‘naked and leaking’ Finn, and, his face when he meets Rose and slightly places himself between her and Finn- “Who’s this?”).

Rose kisses Finn but he doesn't kiss back, it's not even shock he just looks confused and more concerned with saving her. In sum- Rose's body language is all over Finn, even more explicitly than Poe (because heteronormativity and all) but once again Finn looks absolutely clueless of what others feel towards him.

The only times Finn's body language and attitude go beyond more than friendship and admiration are when it's related to Rey... Though then she’s the one whose body language only denotes platonic feelings.

I see what's happening- the authors are showing all these options as red herrings under our noses, which often happens in the middle of trilogies, all so the fans won't be able to guess what's coming. Hell, I could almost feel an asexual vibe from Finn and the Rose x Finn kiss echoes the red herring Leia x Luke kiss in ep V so much...

Personally I still ship stormpilot (though not averse to Rose and Poe sharing Finn but that will never happen and still prefer stormpilot), even though I openly admit that it's clear they wanted to show obvious Finn x Rey chemistry and some Finn x Rose (albeit more one-sided).

Moving on...

ALL THE FUCKING REYLO! My poor shipper heart was exploding!

Topless Kylo! Flustered “please-cover-up-that-distracting-bod” Rey! LMAO!

I'm so happy that reylo is a cannon thing now. Sure, it's in a tragic ship sort of way instead of openly romantic, but damn, that back to back battle against the praetorian guard... AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Scarred Kylo! 

Kylo hesitating and refusing to shoot, most likely because Leia was on board the ship...

Rey crying when she touches Kylo and connects to his emotions. 

Official confirmation that Snoke was already manipulating Ben when he was Luke’s apprentice (like what was stated in the novelization of TFA).

Ben turning to the dark because he felt betrayed by Luke (echoing Anakin and the Jedi Council). 

Kylo constantly conflicted and expressing it through anger and obvious emotional vulnerability, even (or even more so) as he becomes “the big baddy”.

Kylo BEGGING to have Rey on his side. And vice-versa.

Kylo killing Snoke, not for power but for Rey, the power was just his ambition and greed bubbling up as Rey denies him.

Pretty sure Kylo will get a redemption arc- I know it doesn't seem like it but the clues are there and I'm a good 90% sure of this, otherwise we'd just have a copy of Anakin's conflict all over again albeit Kylo being more ambiguous and also less determined in about his intentions. Now, if this redemption ends well or not, with love or without it, with grey jedi or otherwise, that is where the mystery lies.

Ok, I admit, Reylo is my otp but objectively in canon I don't know how the ship will end, at this point it can go either way; but imho Kylo will be redeemed somehow. As a writer and someone very much used to deconstructing plots, I can tell that there are enough clues for this, not just in this movie but in the big picture of the whole SW movieverse. 

One thing is for sure- the old dichotomy of jedi and sith as we know it is dead. Luke, Kylo and Yoda give us enough confirmation of this (and admittedly the whole black-white/good-evil extremes thing was getting SO old).

Personally I'm praying with all my might that we get Grey Jedi at last! And that would make both Rey and Kylo’s predictions true- she strays from the light and him from the dark and they meet in a middle term... It would make sense and seems to have been foreshadowed but unfortunately it’s not one of those things I can say I’m certain off. 

Let’s also have in account that the title of the movie is “The Last Jedi” but intended as plural (even here the subtitle was plural) so when Luke says “I will not be the last jedi”, I don’t think he means Rey exclusively.

Kylo was not made for leadership and rule either so I do wonder who will take the reigns of this crumbled government when it’s all said and done.

What else...

POE BEING A HOT-HEADED DAREDEVIL! He had such an aura of competence and poise in TFA but in TLJ we saw so much development, he was so humanized and flawed (but in the best way).

Phasma’s death was... as we say in Portugal “soube-me a pouco”, aka it felt lacking. Don’t get me wrong, it was epic, but they made such a huge deal of her in PR and marketing (especially in TFA) that it feels like she had a bigger role that got edited out in post-production. The fight with Finn was perfect and excellent for his growth but it felt like we needed more on Phasma to make it more meaningful.

HOLDO’S KAMIKAZE MOVE! Goddamn, I had mixed feelings about her through the whole movie but, although I usually dislike the kamikaze martyr trope, at that moment I just adored her. I feel like we could have gotten a bit more personal with her but either way it was tragically perfect.

Luke’s death felt unnecessary. Again, don’t get me wrong- I was afraid I’d hate it but it was a good death, an appropriate and meaningful one; however, it felt anti-climatic and unnecessary in the progression and pacing of the story itself. Perhaps if framed differently... Either way, the only way the manner of his death can be justified to me is if he has an important role (big or small, whatever, but meaningful) as a Force Ghost in ep IX.

Kinda wish we'd have a Luke-Anaking force ghost reunion; the two of them guiding Leia and Rey and even Kylo... But that's just wishful thinking.

The sweet moment between Leia and Luke broke me, I wanted to cry. They deserved so much more time together, hell, WE deserved to see so much more interaction between them as close siblings.

The almost imperceptive glance we get of the Jedi books safely stored in the Falcon! Begging the questions- who and why?

I wanted more Chewie and definitely more Maz! I really, really, REALLY want more Maz as a sassier modern version of Yoda.

Speaking of- loved the Yoda cameo- Mr ‘if you don’t have the balls then I’ll do for you’.

I get a feeling we’ll be seeing DJ again... But, honestly, so many new characters and they COULDN’T BRING BACK LANDO FUCKING CALRISSIAN?!

Please tell me Rey will build her own lightsaber now! And make it a lightsaber pike, it fits her much better than than the Skywalker saber. 

Liked Rey’s parentage reveal, honestly so much better than having her conveniently be the heir of a pre-existing character. Also gives her tragic past much more intensity.

Porgs were cute but screw them, the Vulptex’s were soooooo much better.

I’m conflicted about Snoke’s death... It was brilliant but at the same time it wasn’t as impactful as it could be if his role had been more pronounced in TFA. Still, very good though.

Best of all- HUX BEING TOSSED AROUND LIKE A DOLL. Deflates his ego beautifully. And when Kylo gives the “shoot with all you got” order when Luke pops up and Hux repeats the order word by word but louder to the troops and Kylo just gives him that ‘bitch, I just said that’ face... Priceless.

I loved BB-8 before but now I ADORE HIM! In Poe’s ship trying to fix the circuit board and then just goes “fuck it” and smashes into the whole thing. xD “Finn, wet, leaking” ! And taking out the prison guards! And piloting a damn AT-AT alone to shoot troopers! He’s so fucking smart and resourceful and just as much a daredevil as Poe, not to mention cute AF! 

BB-9E was interesting we didn’t get much more from him than appearance so BB-8 FTW!

Give me BB-8 merch. All the BB-8 merch!  Pillows, plushies, the drone! I’m in love with all things BB-8!

But when it comes to droids, I wanted more from R2, he felt neglected. Though that move of showing the old recording of young Leia’s distress message to push Luke really was genius.

Wondering if the little boy at the end is force sensitive or if he (or other kids) will have any role in the Resistance, there was a lot of foreshadowing there.

OMG the movie was just sooooo good! The spoilers terrified me but it was so good, for a mid-trilogy movie it was just right. Let’s hope IX lives up to it.

Finally, one last question- WHY IS NOBODY ASKING WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OTHER HANDFUL OF PADAWANS (KNIGHTS OF REN) THAT LEFT WITH BEN??????

I got up and practically saluted when the “in memory of” showed up. It got me in tears.

Ok, end of rambles... for now. 

[ichibanjeon]

Star-crossed

» Star-crossed: frustrated by the stars

Genre: soulmate!au + reincarnation!au + good (?) ol' angst; that's it.

Word count: 3,681 | AO3

Summary: People always reincarnate with the age they first met their soulmate with, so they can age together. Once every 100 years, a pair of soulmates is cursed. In each reincarnation, with the help of clues left for them, but without any form of communication, one must find the other before they die. Otherwise, they lose the ability to reincarnate forever. Yoongi writes diaries hoping that, when he’s ready to show them, Jeongguk isn’t already gone. Not again.

Warnings: mentions of death

Author's Note + "Thank You" Note:

this is my first yoonkook work that is not a) a chaptered fic or b) a drabble, and it's my favourite so far. my heart hurts, i cried, let's cry together if you decide to give this a try. it's the longest thing i've posted. "my heart will go on", "your song" and "river flows in you" are great to listen to while reading.

first of all, i would like to thank one of my best friends, @dani-the-monster; your "hoe don't do it" keeps me grounded while writing angst; the support you gave my writing from the start has encouraged me to improve and keep writing;

and now a very special note: six months ago, when the blood, sweat & tears mv came out, i decided to message a yoonkook blog i had been following for a couple of months, yelling about jeon jungkook and his smirk; tbh i don't know what happened, we literally just yelled for like a week, then i started to sign off as "yell @ jeon", you gave me a tag, i wrote stuff and came off anon, we yelled again, jungkook made a vlive, yoonkook happened, we yelled again, their comeback happened, we were emo, i dedicated "it can wait" to you and you just messaged me yelling and i saw your tags and yelled too and i still cry, why would you use those tags; now we talk almost every day, like one of us just sees a soft picture of jungkook and sends it and we yell for like hours and i always get emo before i go to bed ??? we also yell a lot about yoonkook and their things. a list of our favourite things to mention, send and yell about: jungkook as a puppy, angel, little star and bunny; domestic!yoonkook; studio boyfriends!yoonkook; space metaphors; that giant carrot plushie; soft jungkook; why is yoonkook the angsty duo; yoonpianokook, the real ot3; plushies; "*yoonkook sending kisses gifs* night night!"; "i'm emo"; "I JUST WOKE UP I DIDN'T NEED THIS"; "wHY"; just general yelling tbh. andrea, (@jeonbase)  thank you for six months! "star-crossed" is dedicated to you :)

“It’s dark now and I am very tired. I love you, always. Time is nothing.”

― Audrey Niffenegger

March 4th, 3 a.m.

We arrived yesterday, March 3rd. Namjoon is already asleep, but I had enough coffee to keep me awake for at least 24 hours. There are still no clues, but I’m trying not to worry a lot about it. Last time it took 2 weeks until we got any information.

He’s not… hopeless, you know? It’s not like he’s given up. She’s always so hard to find, and since he didn’t get to be with her before she left… I get it; it’s hard, Guk. When I lost you, I thought I would never see you again. But you wouldn’t know.

Anyways, when you read this, you’ll say “You’re such an idiot, what made you think I would want to read these?”, but I know you read them while I’m out of the house. Speaking of which, where do you want to live this time? Namjoon says he wants to move back to Ilsan. Do you miss Busan a lot?

I don’t have much to say. We’re coming to get you, alright?

Stay alive, kid.

He doesn’t sign it. He doesn’t have to, because the only person who will ever read Yoongi’s diaries already knows him like the back of his hand. He wants to stick to his own words, but trying not to worry a lot about it is different from not worrying. As much as he tries to reassure himself, he knows time can’t always be on his side.

Three lifetimes ago, Yoongi felt like he was dead before dying. Three lifetimes ago, his life stopped making sense. Because three lifetimes ago, Yoongi was too late. Bright lights, a car, people screaming, a turn, a dying man. And a man dying inside.

Yoongi’s memories of that day remain as the hardest part of his existence. It hurts that it happened. It hurts that Jeongguk doesn’t remember. It hurts because it reminds him that he doesn’t have forever. And that’s why he writes.

Namjoon mumbles something in his sleep, which makes the older boy check the clock. 4 a.m. The sky’s far from starry, but there’s still a promise lighting up his night.

It’s been a week since they arrived. They always arrive together, no matter what. Yoongi says it’s a glitch; Namjoon calls it luck, and jokingly adds that maybe they’re the real soulmates.

When you reincarnate, life becomes easier. Time doesn’t bother you anymore, because you’re sure that you’ll make up for lost time with your soulmate in your next life. Exception: if The Council chooses you as the unlucky pair that struggles with time, it does bother you. Exception of the exception: if you’re Min Yoongi, time is just kind of there.

“We can’t,” a loud, disembodied voice said.

“Well, try!” he yelled, his tear-stained face reflecting the light of his surroundings and the pain he felt inside.

Eleven lifetimes ago, Min Yoongi was born for the first time. Eleven lifetimes ago, Jeongguk’s name wasn’t this familiar. It didn’t feel like a warm embrace after the long chase, it didn’t smell like hot coffee made for you in the morning, it didn’t sound like childhood lullabies, it didn’t mean love. But it still meant something, because fate doesn’t just belong in the future, at least in love matters.

When Yoongi turned eighteen, there was a knock on his parents’ door.

“I’m so sorry.” Cursed, black on white, and even though no one had said it, there was a silence that screamed despair.

“What for?” he asked.

“That you’re cursed,” the man replied. Yoongi offered him the only smile he could manage.

“It’s not your fault,” he said. It was no one’s fault. It still hurt.

Yoongi was twenty-three when he met nineteen-year-old Jeon Jeongguk. Yoongi is still twenty-three, and it’s his favorite number. He gets to meet a special boy every time he’s twenty-three.

March 17th, 9 p.m.

We got the first clue today.

It’s vague, it isn’t clear, but it’s something. It’s a guitar pick and it has your name on it. We found it on our doorstep, this morning. Does it mean you’ve stopped neglecting the guitar I bought you? What are you up to?

Namjoon got our stuff from the Department yesterday. Our house is still the same, but I always feel like moving out, you know? Start over.

Do you ever miss any of our previous lifetimes, Guk? I do. I miss the way things were three or four lifetimes ago. You wouldn’t understand… Sometimes, before I meet you, I dig out our old things. What were you thinking when you decided to buy that huge bike?

You’re weird. That’s okay, I like you as you are.

“Wow, I hate you,” Namjoon says, throwing his controller on the couch.

“Salty over Mario Kart, are we?” Yoongi snickers, putting his own down.

“Just extra tired today,” the younger says, and gets up, heading to the kitchen.

“You’ve been searching, haven’t you?”

He doesn’t get an answer right away. He notices how Namjoon almost stops in his tracks, but decides against it and walks in the kitchen. Yoongi is familiar with the urge to find someone who’s so dear to you.

“Hana’s the reason why I’m here,” Namjoon starts. “I was born ten lifetimes ago, and the reason why I’m still here is her.”

He’s not cursed. Well, at least in the official meaning of the term. If you’ve known Kim Namjoon for long enough, you’d have noticed how he seems to consider the soulmate system a curse itself. To chase the love of your life over and over again, in an endless cycle; is he wrong to think so?

“I don’t know- I probably sound stupid right now, but- is it really worth it?” he says, holding an apple.

“It depends,” the other starts, “I would give all I have for your forever.”

“You know I didn’t mean it like that.”

Yoongi nods. It’s a conversation they’ve had before, more times than they can count. The kitchen’s quiet for a few seconds, until Namjoon speaks up.

“Wanna go to the movies tonight? We haven’t had any fun in ages.”

Yoongi shakes his head at the other’s pun, but agrees anyway.

“It doesn’t work like that,” the voice said.

“Make it work then! I – sob – I’ll do any – sob – thing!”

March 22nd, 4 p.m.

Do you remember why we agreed I would be the one to find you? Well I do, but you’re a hard man to find, Jeon Jeongguk. First a guitar pick, now a camera. Where are you? We were in Busan a couple of days ago; your parents say hi.

Namjoon finally figured out where Hana might be. He thinks she’s staying with not-so-close relatives in Moscow. Can you believe? We’re flying out as soon as I get the third clue.

Don’t you ever get tired of showing up in a random location every time? I always end up in Seoul, but you visit new countries all the time. I wish we could use cellphones; if you ask me, that law is quite a stupid one.

I miss your dumb smile whenever we go out.

Soon.

Sometimes, Yoongi dreams of a very happy place. It is far above the clouds, surrounded by the stars. From his spot, he sees all the constellations and the sight mesmerizes him. Time doesn’t mean anything but what it’s supposed to be: a word, as empty as it can be.

Words are terrible. Words hurt but heal as well, and it’s hard not to wonder why. In this happy location, they’re easy to live with, they carry meanings we can understand, but not relate to. He believes there’s a single word that will never stop making sense to him; a sweet earthly word, that feels good and tastes heavenly.

Yoongi feels like he’s floating around. He feels so small, yet so great. The most beautiful comet he has ever seen passes by, close enough to touch. And he feels warm. It’s like his heart was replaced by a star, his own personal source of heat and comfort. He names it Guk, like the sweet earthly boy.

“I can’t ask you to pay this price. Go away and live your life,” the voice said.

A man collapsed on the floor, sobbing loudly, pleading.

The third clue doesn’t arrive the day after, or the days after that one, or the two weeks that follow; Namjoon talks Yoongi into finding Hana first, they’ll look for Jeongguk after that.

Hana isn’t waiting for them at the airport when they arrive, but they manage to get to her relatives’ house relatively fast (they only got lost twice!). Namjoon’s face is now everything but a frown, nothing but true happiness and a hint of relief, as he holds his own soulmate in his arms.

“It’s been too long,” he says, breathlessly. And the girl in his arms becomes the only thing that matters, even if the moment is a fraction of eternity, of their eternity, because Namjoon knows for a fact that taking time for granted would be a foolish thing to do.

“Isn’t it selfish? You get to choose who leaves first,” the voice pointed out.

“I just want a chance to say goodbye.”

“It’s a plane ticket,” Namjoon repeats. “Out of all the things it could have been, they’ve sent you a plane ticket.”

Yoongi doesn’t reply right away; he’s lost in thought. It’s odd, but what could he expect? He’s sitting by a window, a book in his hands, his focus somewhere else. His grip on the book tightens before he lets out a quiet sigh. “Looks like he’s back home, after all. We must have missed him for a couple of hours.”

“We have to leave, Yoongi. It’s not like it can wait,” Namjoon says a bit louder. He’s sitting far from the older boy, hands holding the ripped envelope and the paper rectangle with the words “FLIGHT: 2476; TO: SEOUL” in thick, black letters. It all feels so blunt, so raw, so possible. As if it was as simple as a plane ticket and long flight. Namjoon’s words seem to hit Yoongi, because he puts down the book and stands up, walking towards the other.

“You’re not coming, Joon,” he states.

“Do you actually think I would leave my best friend to his cursed fate? We’re leaving tomorrow and I’m coming with you.”

���I have to do this alone.”

“Or so you think. You didn’t leave me; I’m not leaving you either,” Namjoon says, and his words hit Yoongi again.

“Namjoon,” the other starts, “You know how grateful I am for all you’ve done. But I’m leaving alone, and that’s final.”

“That’s just selfish.”

“Excuse me?”

“You come and go alone; doesn’t it bother you that the people you leave behind are alone too?”

“You know the consequences,” the voice said, matter-of-factly.

A man looks down and plays with his fingers.

“I do.”

April 8th, 2 a.m.

Our lives are made of a series of boards that hold all kinds of switches and buttons. My board has a ton of them, as does yours, as does everyone else’s. The thing is, we like to think that we can press the buttons and mess with the switches, but it’s not our job to do so.

I would say – call me crazy if you want – that our fates are in the hands of higher forces. Not things like The Council, or any gods or goddesses you might have heard about. Things that seem distant and abstract, but they’re actually as real as you and me. Love is one of them.

My biggest regret in all my eleven lives is the fact that I haven’t figured out how to do what those things do. If I could do it, if I could just reach any buttons or switches, maybe things were different. It is both a blessing and a curse, a source of despair and peace of mind, to have your future in the hands of something you don’t really understand.

However, I’m eternally grateful that one of those forces pressed a button called ‘you’ for me. The universe can do whatever it wants, because that button is pressed and nothing can take that away from me. Not even time.

Goodnight, Guk. I’ll be there before you notice it.

“Isn’t this what you wanted?”

A man looks up and nods. “How long?”

No answer.

Yoongi wakes up, startled by the sound of an old door opening. As his eyes adjust to the darkness that surrounds him, he hears footsteps. Turning around, he’s surprised to find Kim Namjoon, his friend of ten lifetimes, standing in the doorway, hair as messy as it could be.

There’s silence. It goes on for who knows how long. Yoongi doesn’t know how late, how early in the morning it is, but it’s not like he cares that much. It doesn’t matter.

It matters, though, that Namjoon sat by his side, pushing aside the open notebook the other had fallen asleep on. It matters that they don’t speak, that they don’t have to. It matters that, through the silence that has settled, Yoongi hears quiet, muffled sobs. It matters that soon, the sobs belong to two instead of one, and the embrace that follows matters too, as well as two hearts that fear for each other, because of love and loss, of life and death, of the silence that means too much.

It is four a.m. when Namjoon lets out an ironic laugh, one that is meant to be cheerful, and wipes his tears. It’s the way his arms circle Yoongi’s frame that gives it all away, and the other knows, and it hurts that it’s impossible to avoid, because it’s inevitable, because it’s no use trying to fight pressed buttons.

“Take care,” Namjoon says. All he has to say, all he thinks he left unsaid, is in those two words, in the tears that created liquid paths on his cheeks, in the way he wants to hold the older boy, as if maybe – and even if it seems like a foolish thing to do – that would stop time, just so he doesn’t have to go just yet.

“You take care too, kid,” Yoongi replies. He means, “I’ll never forget you, even if time makes me forget myself.”

"Hey! How long?"

April 9th, 9 a.m.

As it always happens when I get to meet you again, I don’t know what to write. I don’t want to get cheesy because well, I’m not really a cheesy person. I’m sitting outside the house we’ve shared for some years. I know you’re still asleep, because who could wake you up on a Sunday morning? (Hopefully our doorbell will.)

Namjoon couldn’t come; he couldn’t come because I didn’t let him. “I have to do this alone,” I told him, and it’s true. As you’ll see as you go on – and become less of a little shit – there are a few things one must do alone. A few feelings we have to go through by ourselves.

Lao Tzu said, “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."

I know I feel brave whenever I think of you, so if you ever needed reassurance, here it is: I love you. I love you as I did eleven lifetimes ago, yesterday, today, tomorrow and forever, even if some say it’s useless, even if the world ends and the sky falls, even if you ever doubt it, even if I’m gone, my love for you will stay the same.

In this world of soulmates, there are a few things we get to call eternal. We were cursed, yes we were, so our ‘forever’ is different from everyone else’s. Our forever is made of fear, of hope and trust. I fear that I might lose you every time we come back. I hope you’re always here to greet me again, just like the first time. I trust you, and that your little heart is strong enough to go on.

Just like you give me courage, I hope I give you strength. To be deeply loved by someone is such a wonderful feeling, and I know that, because I feel strong at the thought of you. If I ever needed reassurance, you’re the best at giving it.

This is not meant to be a love letter, but a letter from a lover to his lover. And if you ever need it, let this be a reminder of who we are, the story of two star-crossed lovers.

Time to ring the doorbell.

“Are you listening to me? How long?”

“Do you really want to know?”

“Please.”

Jeon Jeongguk hates it when someone wakes him up on a Sunday morning. And that’s why his mood is not the best when he’s startled by the high-pitched sound of the doorbell. He groans, stretches and rolls around, mentally (and maybe thinking out loud too) cursing the most likely unwanted visitor.

He takes his time to get up, the fluffy carpet tickling his feet. He puts on the first shirt he can find, slowly leaves the room, walks down the stairs, and looks out the window. To say he was surprised to see his favorite person in the world standing outside would be an understatement.

Min Yoongi has his black hair styled casually, hands in his pockets, the red shirt Jeongguk gave him for his fourth twenty-third birthday peeking from under a black hoodie, the kind that makes him look smaller than he is, and the younger boy can’t help but smile at the sight of the other’s small frame in oversized clothes.

Jeongguk literally runs to the front door, takes a deep breath and unlocks it, before opening it and allowing himself to stare once again. Only then does Yoongi look up from the ground, where a brown backpack is, and lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in. His hands are shaking, he notices, and so are his legs, but he still runs to the other’s embrace, shaky breaths filling the hair. Then a kiss, as passionate as the first, and they hold each other’s faces, each other’s frames, each other’s hearts.

In a rush to love, to make up for the lost time, to reassure each other with a whispered “I’m here”, they enter the house, Yoongi’s hand dragging the brown backpack along. It’s a moment that goes on for minutes, and it feels like hours.

“So you were in Seoul the whole time?” is the only question the older boy can manage.

“I was. I arrived last week,” the other replies.

“We were in Moscow, to look for Hana, but that’s a story for another time. And Namjoon says hi,” the thought of his best friend is enough to make Yoongi’s heart ache in a way he can’t handle, not now.

Jeongguk notices the dark bags under his eyes. “You’re exhausted, Yoongi.”

He feels exhausted. “Can we take a nap? I’ll tell you all the stories when we wake up.” Jeongguk smiles and nods, leading the other up the stairs.

Their room is exactly as he remembers, the weird lamp he got at a garage sale, the large painting Jeongguk made for their anniversary, the blinds that they should fix, the dark brown doors of the walk-in closet that they use as a storage room, that light grey walls that would be sad and naked without their pictures together.

Yoongi drops the brown backpack and tells Jeongguk, “Some things for you to read when we wake up. All the stories you might not remember.”

He takes off his hoodie and places it on the armchair by his side, and then he crawls on bed and gets under the covers, the pain in his heart unbearably strong now, and he feels so, so tired. He just wants to sleep.

Jeongguk feels odd. There’s something wrong. His heart hurts too. Realization hits him all at once, and he doesn’t understand half of it. All he knows is that there’s something he has to say before time takes over, before it’s too late, before he’s too suffocated by the pain in his little heart.

“You knew it all along?” he lets out, and the other nods.

“I’m so sorry.”

“What for?” Jeongguk asks.

“That we’re cursed,” Yoongi replies. It’s getting harder to speak, to breathe, to live.

“It’s not your fault,” Jeongguk says. It’s getting harder to reply, to stay, to live.

“Will you stay with me?” Yoongi asks. He means, “I don’t want to be alone when I leave.”

There’s a hand that holds a hand, and two other hands that wipe tears on different faces. There’s an empty room, filled with more than can be put in words. There are two bodies, two star-crossed lovers, two lives tied forever. There’s a dying man, a man dying inside, and their hardest goodbye, all over again, like a dejà vu. And perhaps regret, love and loss, life and death. And pain. And love. Aren’t they the same, for the few unlucky ones?

“I’m a speck of dust floating in space, and you’re the most beautiful comet I’ve ever seen,” Yoongi lets out. It’s his last goodbye.

And they are a comet, a cursed ‘we’ going in circles through time. They are star-crossed, a pair of soulmates that was meant to be, just not forever. There’s a nineteen-year-old boy, shaky breath and blurry vision, because the stardust becomes too much to handle, and whispered secrets of the universe they share being spilled onto a pillow.

“We’re the comet, Yoongi, going in circles around the sun. And our hearts are a single star. And the dust we left behind is what I’ll be holding on to.”

“3.”

A man nods again. He bows respectfully and waits until he’s back home.

A few hours later, he’s finishing a letter. A diary.

“Jeon Jeongguk, I do not regret a thing."

[charactersadvocatechimata]

Second Chances (PT.2)

First Part

Apparently, it is okay to give the crazy man the heavy tools. Ah. Desperation drives men to do illogical situation. The flat is a mess. The wiring system doesn’t know which way is up. Water damage, too. The pipes should all be replaced, some are even rotted. The heater out of everything is simply the worst off. She is Tony’s favorite. He has dubbed her Betty. And don’t think for a moment that Tony won’t fight both small Steve bubbly Bucky about it. This is mountain he will die on.

Wouldn’t be the first time.

“Home a bit early.”

“What about it Stevie?” Something bangs against the floor.

“Been fired enough times and it’s old hat, eh. What was it this time?”

“Fuck off.”

The walls are pretty thin too. Probably don’t protect much from the elements. Or sound. The sound is very clear. Insulation is always a must. But would require tearing down the walls.  

“Buck!”

“What Steve? What? I’m not the only one home early. Let’s hear it. What’s your grand reason?”

“He was a bully.”

“That’s what you always say.”

Should Tony tear down the wall? Something which is usually frowned on by most. Or he could smack the pre-serum fools heads together with a wrench. The wrench they gave Tony for emphasis. The wrench is a more satisfying solution.

“Why are you both like this? Communication is important. Communication, not squawking at each other.” Jabs a finger at the smaller brat. “Bucky got drafted. And the box is not your friend. There is always another option.” Metaphoric wrenches still count. Just not as satisfying.

Tony returns to the heater, the most sensible existence in the room.

“Drafted?”

“Fuck you.”

The door slams or it would if it wasn’t wet cardboard. But that fact should be ignored to respect the sentiment of the door slam. He was raised properly after all.

Bucky curls himself toward the couch or a mass of fabric and wood that strives to be a couch. Tony isn’t sure. Never built a couch before, but it can’t be that hard. Something plushy.

“Shouldn’t you have been the one to storm out?” Bad mouth. Don’t get involved. Not with emotions. Emotions bad.

“Things have always been a little backward between us.”

Kay~

Not how someone would usually describe their relationship but who knows what Tony would say if asked to describe his relationship with Rhodey. Or Pepper. Or the Spider-kid.

“Long as your happy.”

“He’s family.”

“No. I get that. Better than you know.”

“Speaking of which-”

Danger. Danger Will Robinson! Distract. Something. Set something on fire! No. Bad plan. Who knows if this building has sprinklers. Or a fire escape. Panic. Maybe try panic. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

Panic solves nothing. But there’s nothing to fix!

“How ja know my name? Or that I was drafted?”

“I am not a stalker!”

“Nobody said you were.”

“Good. Because I have never stalked someone against their will in my life. Information is just one of those things that happen. Okay. Taste the rainbow of the future. And accept the horrifying unknown.”

The biggest problem with all Bucky’s question is that Tony has no way of knowing what sort of time traveling situation he is in. Is this the time travel where you fuck up a little thing and everything is fucked up. Or is it where all fucks up are inevitable so you might as well fuck up. On the other hand, considering the future Tony comes from everything is already fucked up. So Tony should fuck something up. Or Tony already fucked it up and that is why the future is fucked up. Master of the fuck up any variation is possible.

Then again you’d think Steve would have mentioned the whole ‘we’ve met’ thing. Unless Tony looks really different now than when they first met. Or met again. Maybe he hasn’t aged well. He doesn’t sleep much. There is also all the stress. Maybe being a silver fox was an unreachable dream. A dream dashed against Captain America's hard pecs.

“Do you think I’m ugly?”

“Now, mister, don’t try-”

“Cause I swear I used to be handsome.”

With an expression that Tony has come to expect from Pepper or Rhodey, Bucky exhales a liter of happiness. “You’re a beautiful man, Tony.”

“You mean that?”

“Yes.” And Bucky probably does. There is absolutely no reason for anyone to flatter Tony. He has nothing. He is nothing. Nothing! A normal person.

“I deserve a vacation.”

“Sure. You seem stressed.”

“Exactly. I am officially starting my first vacation.”

“First?!”

Bucky, surprisingly quickly, seemed to have reached the acceptance stage of knowing Tony Stark. The quickest after Rhodey. Rogers always seemed to be stuck between the anger and bargaining stages. Bucky’s leaning against onto the couch, hoping it would share some of his weight, and watching Tony. Yet a part of him is drawn to the door to chase after Steve. To apologize? Did Steve have that effect on people even while Skinny?

The serum makes everything more.

God. Tony could use a vacation. But everything that can be fixed, is fixed. At least by Tony’s current means. Everything else is more bulldoze the building and start from scratch. Fresh smart building with AI.

“I’m bored.”

“Already? Maybe you should try relaxing.” Bucky pats the cloth-wood pile, a gesture to incite sitting on said pile. Probably not an invite to fix or build a new couch. Or to set it on fire. He probably even attached to the pile. Tony had his couch since the MIT days.

Clearly, the only option is to lay on the floor in a starfish pattern. Staring at the ceiling Tony notices, even more, water damage. That and the feel of Bucky laying on the floor next to him. Rhodey used to that too.

“Try breathing.”

“Breathing and me, we’re no good. Maybe I started it with all the smoking but they're a dick now.”

Strange wheezing noise emits from Bucky. “Sure. What do you usually do then?”

Drugs, sex, and throwing away money have always been a bit of a lie. Fun sometimes but mostly a great excuses for self-pity. Programming and robots were his first pick when stressed for as long as he can remember. But it also work. You are not supposed to work on vacation.

“Work.”

“What about a hobby?”

“Work that benefits my friends.”

“How about something that benefits you?”

Flying. Once. “I don’t know.”

“Stevie has art.”

Aunt Peggy’s stories often came with illustrations. Pages and pages and pages of singed, dirty, stained, ink smeared and torn paper. Doodles of monkeys dancing on stages. Cartoon shorts of the Howling Commandos. Cute colored images of Aunt Peggy with a gun or punching a Nazi. Jokes about this Hydra base or the other. Tony used to relate to those colors.

“I am aware.”

“Sure. Sure. I like to dance.”

Ripped tutus scattered on the floor and a broken nose from being shoved too hard into a wall. “Stark men don’t dance.”

“Okay, Stark.”

“Don’t call me that.” Tony sits up. He can’t stand the floor. Too cold. Too hard. Losing his breath and his heart pounds too loud against his chest. Louder than thunder. Louder than a bomb. Louder than someone pounding the ivory keys of a grand piano.

“Sorry. Tony.” Bucky sitting up too. Wearing the same face his going to wearing that freezing bunker. “So I need a new job.”

“Something to occupy the hands and the mind are always good.”

“Sure. Sure. You could help. Sightsee New York while we’re at it.”

Well, can’t say Tony has ever seen 1940’s, New York. Considering he wasn’t born yet. Didn’t see much of New York at all when got shipped off to boarding school either.

“Sightseeing is a vacation thing.”

“A classic vacation thing.”

“Alright, James. Let’s find you a job.”

“James.”

“Well, I can’t right call you Bucky or Buck now can I?”

“Whatever you say, Tony.”