#this is actually one of the major reasons why I'm so hesitant to drop the theory that Miquella and Mohg were working together

[eldritchtouched]

Weird Guard Behavior with Elphael/Haligtree/Malenia

So, in mysteries, there is a cliche about when "the dog doesn't bark."

The scenario in those stories is generally that something looks like a crime done by a stranger, but the guard dog didn't react to the presence of an unknown person. This is evidence in the story that the person was known to the dog and, thus, not a stranger.

Elden Ring has a similar thing going on with Malenia and the Haligtree, though a bit more complicated because the guard dog is a very simple thing. In cases where it's people instead of guard dogs, it's more a matter of, given what is established about the characters and/or factions, what would we expect given various details.

We have a general idea of their characterizations, and what the likely scenario is. So there's a few questions that are important to answer, to understand their behavior and work from that. First- do they know Miquella is gone? Second- what are they doing after they know that?

We have an answer to both.

Malenia knows Miquella is gone, as do the Haligtree soldiers. Malenia outright tells the player this information ("as I awaited his return") and her armor specifies that she was waiting for Miquella at the foot of the Haligtree. The quoted dialogue on her armor is specifically her consoling someone else and that Miquella "will keep his promise." The Haligtree soldier ashes, too, note that Miquella isn't there- that's why they're despairing.

A common idea in the fandom is that Malenia doesn't know Miquella is gone at all. Likewise, I've seen routine complains that the player cannot encounter Mohg before Malenia, then go to Malenia to tell her about Mohg and Miquella and getting her help to return Miquella to the Haligtree. This actively ignores that Malenia and the other people in the Haligtree all know Miquella is gone. (This taking off confuses me because Malenia outright tells the player that she's waiting for Miquella.)

We also know the other answer- what are they doing? They are waiting for him to get back. They are not searching for him, not even a little.

Haligtree soldiers are the only faction soldiers who are explicitly only found in the core of their structure- in Elphael. Godrick soldiers are found throughout Limgrave, Redmane soldiers are found throughout Caelid, Leyndell soldiers and knights are found in multiple places, etc. And Malenia remains at the foot of the tree, awaiting Miquella's return.

Likewise, they are guarding Elphael in such a strange way if they aren't guarding Miquella (and, again, they know he's gone). It's got some of the tightest security in the game in terms of how every possible path is a death trap that's absolute ass (that one stretch of Revenants at the bottom layer comes to mind) and/or a bunch of soldiers, along with them having multiple ballistae set up pointing at the paths someone would have to go down to get deeper into the Haligtree.

It seems that the Haligtree's guarding was intentional. For example, it's only after you defeat Malenia and the player tells Gideon that Miquella wasn't there that Gideon reveals that he heard the story that Miquella was cut out of the Haligtree. Gideon initially dismissed it and this is possibly why it's guarded like that- to hide that Miquella wasn't there.

My point is that the dog didn't bark. The Haligtree and Malenia did not react to Miquella being supposedly abducted, despite knowing he's gone, despite their continued loyalty to him. They instead expect him to return on his own.

[ireadwithmyears]

Hi! Would you be able to write something for the clones (any of them) with a reader who has a guide dog. I've been running into a lot of issues with people trying to distract her and borderline harassing us (the president of my university follows us around with his unleashed dog running up to us, someone grabbed her nose when we were on a bus and then screamed at us, I'm a biology/genetics major so we get some subtle discrimination in academic opportunities like research projects, etc). Also I don't currently live somewhere with public transportation so I have to take Uber to get anywhere which is a whole other nightmare (a driver dropped us off at the wrong location and I was stuck in a sketchy part of town for 45 minutes while drivers kept denying us a ride). Maybe something with how the clones would comfort/handle their SO dealing with these things. Obviously you don't have to write about all of these scenarios, just some ideas

You don't have to of course, but I figured it was worth an ask:)

Looking Out for You:Part 1

Pairing: Commander Fox/fem Reader

Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Visually impaired reader masterlist

Word count: 4.1 K

Tags/warnings: Visually impaired reader, meet cute, grumpy x sunshine vibes, denial of feelings(Fox falls first, he falls hard, and he denies it every single step of the way because he’s Fox), guide dog cuteness, brief mention of ableism(this chapter is pretty tame, but in future installments, I intend to explore these elements more deeply, specifically as they pertain to service dog users. These topics aren’t always the most comfortable to discuss. But I feel they are important to bring awareness to)

Summary: Making the transition from your small, rural homeworld to Coruscant already promises to be tough. But when you’re employed to work at the Senate buildings directly under senator Organa and you’re also a guide dog user, things quickly become more complicated, in a variety of ways. Luckily, you seem to have caught the eye of a certain Marshal commander, who swears up and down that he’s not falling in love with you, but who, regardless, always has your back, and is always looking out for you.

A.k.a. 

The three times Fox makes sure that you get home safely. Plus the one time he ends up following you inside

Authors note: Hii anon. I was so happy to hear from you and received this request. As a fellow guide dog user, I have so many different experiences that I feel are worth sharing, so that more people are aware of the trials we face because as amazing as it is that we have these incredible animals, it isn’t always just a nice walk in the park. Which leads me to my next point. Because of all of these experiences that I want to highlight, this 1shot quickly evolved into a four part series, to give it the proper breathing room that I feel it deserves. I hope that’s okay, and I hope you still like this one. If you’d like to message me privately so that I can make sure you’re tagged in each subsequent update, please do. I’d be happy to do that

The first time it happens, Fox is admittedly running on his default, which is to say in plain terms that he is annoyed.

“Why is this my problem?”

Fox winces upon hearing the barely concealed snarl in his own voice through his helmet speakers. He could have phrased that better. He should have at least taken the courtesy to add “with all due respect” when leading into that sentence, even if both he and the trooper who has the misfortune of being at the other end of the line are both fully aware that he doesn’t intend to sound respectful in the slightest.

There’s a pause, a hesitation on the other end of the coms, which causes Fox to silently berate himself for his initial sharp tone. He reminds himself, as he does about 500 times daily, that he needs to be more careful with it.

This warning, for some reason, always falls on deaf ears. But still, Fox wagers that he at least keeps trying, and who knows, maybe one of these days, it’ll actually stick. It probably won’t.

“It’s just that the issue is occurring at the entrance closest to your office, sir,” the trooper begins before rushing to add, “but if you’re busy, we can send—”

“Don’t bother,” Fox sighs. “I’m already on my way there.”

Maybe he shouldn’t be on such a high horse, but really, being sent to investigate a loitering complaint is far above what he, as a marshall commander, should be doing. Despite this though, he privately admits that he’s been looking for an excuse to stand up from his desk chair and stretch his legs. Maybe if he’s lucky, he'll manage to shake off the aching twinge in his left shoulder, hunched from filling out a last-minute stack of crime reports that he had been on the scene of, all from the previous night between the hours of 1 to 3 in the morning. So really, he rationalizes, can anyone blame him for being more than a little bit pissed off at the interruption? 

Maybe it’s a sign that he needs a refill on his caf. 

He rounds the corner and, with what is in hindsight probably more force than is necessary, smacks a hand against an access panel. The door slides open, and a cool breeze hits him as he steps outside into the open air.

His eyes scan through the visor of his helmet, and to his annoyance he doesn’t see the suspected loiterer that he had been warned of, at least not at first. 

Sighing, he steps further out and past the awning above the entrance. Though the air is cool, the sun still shines, and the slight glow causes his eyes to catch on the gloss of your hair as you walk past, eyes nervous as they flick around. Sensing his presence, you pause, shoulders stiffening slightly as you turn to face him with trepidation. Fox also takes notice, his eyes widening in momentary surprise when he observes the guide dog harnessed at your left side, looking up at you with big brown eyes, as if silently trying to understand your sudden hesitance.

You, of course, have every reason to be suspicious of any unannounced or unidentified presence in your vicinity, especially now that you’re living on Coruscant. But, if you’re honest, you’re already on edge, and even though it’s still morning, the day has promised to be shit if the beginning of it is any indication.

Senator Organa isn’t in the habit of firing his junior staff for small mistakes like this, you remind yourself. Still, the thought, no matter how many times you’ve repeated it like a mantra at this point, doesn’t manage to calm your growing nerves, because regardless you’re still lost, and you’re still running late. You silently curse the pitfalls of being blind and using a ride-sharing service, and then you have to restrain yourself from cursing aloud when your eyes land on the silhouette parked a few meters in front of you.

You don’t have much vision. But with what you do have, it’s enough to deduce bright, contrasting colors. And the red splotches against white armor has you stopping dead in your tracks, because within the span of two seconds, a cold clarity settles within your stomach, because the red and white armor is distinctly and unmistakably that of a Coruscant Guard member, the visor of his helmet tilted, looking no doubt with suspicion directly at you.

Resisting the urge to bemoan the shortage of orientation and mobility droids designed to assist with transitions like this—which would have ensured that you would have been able to smoothly get yourself out of this situation in the first place—you bring your guide dog to heel before gesturing for her to sit, then slowly and hesitantly raise your eyes to the trooper, already feeling a mix of anxiety and guilt stirring in the pit of your stomach.

There’s a small sound from his helmet, a hesitation as he seems to clear his throat before speaking. 

“Personal Senatorial aides aren’t permitted to use this entrance,” he says, gesturing to the badge on the lanyard that hangs around your neck. 

He speaks as if this is a reminder that he’s given more than once, which you’re sure he has. Still, there’s an underlying sharpness to it that makes you jump despite your efforts not to react. 

“I, I know,” you say, swallowing before rushing to continue. “I didn’t mean to be dropped off here, sir. I took a Speedershare to get here this morning, and I didn’t realize the driver dropped me off at this entrance until I got out, and by that point it was too late, and I should have asked to verify which one he was going to but—”

“Hey, easy. Slow down.”

The trooper steps closer to you, and it’s only then that you register that you’ve been rambling, your anxiety ratcheting up with each word. Now that you’re silent, you can feel the way your heart is pounding. You’ve seen the Guard around, of course, but you’ve never really interacted with any of them. He’s tall, you realize as he stands in front of you and you look up into the visor of his helmet. Tall and broad, and you were already nervous before he showed up. 

But his hands are raised, in supplication or as an offering of peace, you’re not sure. But regardless, he doesn’t seem on the verge of scolding you further for your silly mistake, which is good, because your nerves are still so frayed from getting out of your ride only to realize that you had no idea where you were, and that apart from knowing that you were somewhere at the Senate building, you were effectively lost and alone. A scolding, delivered with just the right amount of displeasure, would probably be enough to make you start crying, which would make this day go from being the worst to certifiably irredeemable.

“Speedershare isn’t always the most reliable service. Your employer is Senator Organa,” he says, eyes once again scanning over your badge. “I’m sure he could arrange an alternate transportation service that is much more consistent and professional for you to use.”

“I don’t want his charity,” you say, and you can’t help the hard edge that creeps into your voice when you speak.

But really, you don’t. You know that he could, and knowing Senator Organa, he would be happy to do so. But it’s unnecessary. You grew up needing extra accommodations and things that, despite your teachers’ constant stream of reassurances, always made you feel singled out. 

You’re an adult now, and you don’t want that. You don’t need his charity, his pity, or to be added to his ever-growing list of things to worry about at the beginning and end of each day—an item to be checked off. 

As far as you’re concerned, the best thing you can do for the both of you is to keep this to yourself, and you’ll figure out how to manage sooner or later.

Fox takes a step back, able to recognize your quick deflection of his suggestion as a sign that he’s slightly overstepped, and he nods, glancing towards the door.

“Well,” he says, forcing his voice to sound lighter. “I suppose I could let you off the hook this once and let you use this entrance.”

“Thank you,” you say, before hesitantly adding, “I, I’m not familiar with the route to get to Senator Organa’s office from where we are. Would you, I mean, you don’t have to if you’re busy, but—”

“I’ll take you there,” he cuts you off, finality in his voice. “Do you, uh, need a guide or anything?”

Fox internally kicks himself for not knowing how to handle a situation like this, but you give your head a small shake, which allows him a moment of relief. 

“The color on your armor is bright,” you respond, and for the first time in this interaction, you smile. He can’t help but admire the way it seems to transform you, your previous nerves and worry disappearing like the sun breaking through the clouds. It’s quite lovely, he observes, and then internally kicks himself just a bit harder as punishment for that traitorous thought. 

Useless, he scolds. Unnecessary. But it’s already been thought, and he can’t take it back. He’s grateful for the helmet concealing his face, hiding the way his lips repeatedly twitch in an effort to turn upward as he hears you, your voice giving a soft, encouraging command, and the slight pitter patter of paws against pavement as your guide dog leads you to follow after him. 

He firmly resolves not to speak unless necessary until he’s taken you to the senator's office.

This resolve lasts for less than two minutes before he feels the slight brush of a wet nose against his hand and hears a small sniffing sound at his hip. Turning his head, he finds your guide dog, who has stopped walking and is sniffing at a pouch around his waist, and you looking sheepish as you stand behind him.

“Mandalore, leave it,” you scold, your voice lower than he’s heard it and with a suddenly authoritative edge that has his eyes widening slightly. You’re so little, he thinks, and all you’ve ever been whilst interacting with him is timid and quiet like a mouse. Seeing that side of you, as if flipped on by a switch, well...he can’t help but be taken by slight surprise. You pull back the harness, giving it a slight shake and the dog, with obvious reluctance, backs off, abandoning its curiosity.

“I’m sorry,” you say quickly, your cheeks heating with a blush. His hand twitches of its own accord, struck with an unexplained urge to reach out and touch, wondering if he would feel the warmth of your cheek beneath his gloved fingers.

Kriff, his internal monologue groans, disgusted. What the fuck is wrong with you today? He refocuses, looking down at you and shaking his head.

“Your dog’s name is Mandalore?” he asks, genuinely curious and unable to hide the amusement in his voice.

You laugh, nodding your head. “The one and only,” you grin. “Certain training schools do things differently. But the one we went to likes to name each litter by theme, and hers happened to be planets.”

You lower your voice, leaning in conspiratorially with a slight twinkle in your eye. 

“You know, for a Mandalore, she doesn’t look very intimidating, does she?” you ask, and he’s surprised, startled even, to hear the snort of laughter that is pulled from him as he nods his head, looking down at the guide dog who’s unaffected, her professional mask barely concealed behind a tail that wags at him and big, pleading eyes that seem to pierce through his soul.

“No, she really doesn’t,” he agrees, and your grin widens.

“I’ve always joked that if a burglar broke into my house, she wouldn’t bark or growl or try to bite at them,” you say, still smiling as you continue to walk. “She would simply flop down on the ground at their feet and roll over to demand a belly rub.”

“Well…” he says, and faintly, in the back of his head, he registers that he’s 

actually smiling. Huh, he thinks, taken slightly off-guard by the strange feeling. He can’t remember the last time that’s happened. It’s almost slightly disturbing. “If she’s not a fighter, she at least has some good distraction tactics.”

You laugh, your previous nerves surrounding getting lost and being late all but forgotten. It’s a nice sound, bright and lively, and Fox, the Maker help him, finds that he wants to hear it again.

“She probably smells the treats I keep in my pouch for Grizzer,” Fox explains, slightly rueful. He rolls his eyes and pretends to dislike it every time Hound brings the massiff to his office, citing that his panting is distracting, and that his drool gets everywhere, which is disgusting. Those things are both true. But Fox also can’t help but appreciate the warm weight of Grizzer’s head against his leg or the large, imploring eyes the massiff gives him when he knows that Fox has food. 

“I figured it would be unprofessional of me to offer one to her,” he continues, and you nod your head, glancing down.

“It would, but...” you begin slowly, calculating as you clock the staircase you’re approaching and turning your head to look up at him as a slow smile pulls at the corners of your lips. “If you give it to me, I could give it to her by proxy if you want.”

He nods, unzipping the small pouch, guiding you to hold out your hand as he places several small treats on the palm of it, which already has the dog vibrating with eagerness. But you don’t give in right away. 

“Forward,” you say, gesturing your head to the small set of stairs. The added incentive makes the dog quick on her feet, and you have to tell her to slow down as she rushes to comply, guiding you towards the stairs, barely able to contain the excited trot in her step. “Okay, Mandalore, show me where the railing is.”

The guide dog turns slightly, changing course to lead you towards the railing on the far right, placing her front paws up on the stairs and pausing, turning her head to look up at you for approval. 

“Yes,” you beam, stroking a hand along her head. “You learn so fast. Good girl.”

Fox watches, a smile on his face as you hold out your hand with the treats, giving it a few taps against the railing before opening your palm, offering it to her. She eagerly gobbles them up without hesitation, her tail never ceasing its happy little wiggles, which makes Fox want to laugh.

“You know,” he says, stepping up beside you and beginning to mount the stairs. “On second thought, maybe she is a fighter. I mean, she looked like she was ready to take off your fingers along with the treats.”

“When it comes to food, she definitely is,” you say with a grin, following after him. “If only all burglars came covered in peanut butter or dog treats, I’d feel much safer about our odds.”

You both snicker, and the rest of the journey up to the senators’ offices passes in a relatively comfortable silence apart from Fox giving you a few quiet directions as you make your way through the halls. You never fail to turn your head and smile at him each time he warns you of a crowd of people incoming so you can maybe take a step to the side, or if you need to turn left or right at this next intersection.

He isn’t sure how to describe it, but his heart does something strange each time you do. 

“I’m sorry for the inconvenience...” you trail off, uncertain of the trooper’s name as you stand outside the doorway to Senator Organa’s office.

“Fox,” he responds, and he’s quickly struck by the strangeness of how he felt compelled to give you his chosen name first instead of his rank. That, he thinks, is definitely odd and out of the ordinary, but he recovers himself quickly. “Commander Fox,” he adds, and your cheeks rapidly heat with a blush.

“Oh, Force,” you groan, covering your cheeks with your hands and closing your eyes, mortified. “I’m sorry, Commander. I didn’t mean to inconvenience so much of your time.”

“Don’t worry,” he says, and the brush of gloved fingers against your arm is barely there, brief and gone in an instant, but it’s enough to startle you out of your embarrassment, your eyes widening as you look up at him. “It wasn’t an inconvenience,” he says, sounding so sincere that you lose any ability to respond to that, falling into a silence in which the both of you simply stand, contemplating each other.

Fox, for his part, is struck by the realization that, for once, he means every word he’s just said. 

“Well,” you say, blinking as you try to shake yourself out of your stupor. “Regardless of the circumstances, it was lovely to meet you, Commander, and if we ever encounter each other again, you may want to introduce yourself by name if we speak. Every trooper shares the same voice, which makes it much harder for me to differentiate between you all, and I’d hate to mistake you for someone else and embarrass the both of us any further. At least, more than I probably already have.”

“Right,” he says, equally as slowly and strangely hesitant for this conversation to end but not knowing what else to add. “Understood.” 

“I should go,” you say, feeling suddenly shy as you give him a small smile and turn to the door. “See you around, Commander,” you murmur, giving him a playful wink.

You step into the office, not waiting for his response. It takes him a full 30 seconds of just standing there out in the hall listening to the sound of dog paws tapping against the floor, growing distant as you move out of his listening range, to realize that you left him—completely and deliberately if the smirk that was pulling at the corners of your lips was any indication—with a blind joke.

He chokes, uncertain of if he’s allowed to laugh—of if it would be completely inappropriate for him to laugh. His cheeks heat with belated awkward embarrassment. He shakes his head, making a note as he forces his feet to move and forces himself to walk away, heading back in the direction of his office.

The next time he sees you—and he can’t help the strange and foreign hope that twinges in his chest at even the thought of seeing you again—he’ll have to ask you.

Until then, he thinks, giving himself a firm shake as he maneuvers himself through the halls of the Senate building. He resolves to keep you—the girl with the pretty smile, the hair that looks like it was made to run fingers through, and the infectious laugh that he still hears clear as a bell even now that you’re gone—far from his thoughts, ordering himself to stop acting like some sort of lovesick puppy and for kriff sake to just get back to work.

*

Fox, to his consternation, is unsuccessful.

The whole day, as he goes about his tasks—filling out reports, sending requisitions to the Senate, doing patrol—he can’t stop thinking about you. 

Your smile as you tilted your head to look up at him, your warm, encouraging demeanor as you worked with your guide dog, the excitable pup looking up at you like you’re her whole galaxy, the way that he had been able to make you genuinely laugh...

Okay, maybe his bar for sharing friendly interactions with natborns was insanely low up to this point. But knowing that he had brought that out of you had felt strangely good, leaving a warm, unfamiliar feeling in his stomach that lingered every time he thought of it.

He’s so unsuccessful at keeping his mind off of you during the workday that it’s still early in the afternoon when he pulls up your file on the database, scrolls through your work schedule, and at the end of the day is standing outside of Senator Organa’s office waiting for your shift to end.

When he sees you come out, Mandalore, sensing his presence before you do, happily begins to waggle her tail, her footsteps quickening as she leads you out of the office. He calls out to you, and you turn, searching for the voice.

“It’s Fox,” he says, removing his helmet and tucking it beneath his arm. “From this morning.”

Is he imagining it, or do your eyes actually light up when you spot him? 

“I just wanted to make sure that your ride picks you up without complication,” he continues. “Not that I don’t think you can do that on your own,” he rushes to add, his cheeks heating slightly. He’s already gotten the sense that you don’t like being underestimated, and he respects that. “I can make sure that you have detailed instructions in the app so that your driver knows exactly which entrance to collect you.”

“That would actually be super helpful!” you exclaim, and there’s no masking the relief in your voice as you pull out your comm, fiddling with it for a second before passing it to him. “I’ve been meaning to ask someone to update them, because I have a vague idea of what each entrance looks like and how to describe them, but honestly, I don’t think it’s enough to be helpful.”

He takes the device from you, and working quickly, types up detailed directions on how to get to the staff entrance along with a description of its surroundings. He pastes a copy into your notes for good measure so that you’re able to keep reusing it at your convenience. He explains all this to you as he passes it back, letting you know your ride is booked.

“You’re an angel, Fox,” you say in a relieved breath, beaming up at him. “Moving here has been so stressful as it is, and getting used to the transit options is just one more thing on top of that.”

You miss the way his cheeks go pink, but you do catch his quiet, breathy chuckle as he awkwardly avoids your gaze. 

“Right, well,” he scratches at the back of his neck, looking down at the ground. “Your ride should be here soon. Want me to come with you and make sure it shows up?”

“I don’t want to hold you up if you have other things to do,” you say uncertainly, biting your lip.

The truth is, you so badly want to say yes. Waiting for a Speedershare on your own can be anxiety inducing. So many things can go wrong. Your driver might not be able to find you, and when they call and ask you for directions, you aren’t able to provide them with much help. They could drive past and cancel altogether once they realize you have a service dog. Or worse, they can turn it into a full out yelling confrontation. In all cases, you’ve learned, your anxiety is significantly lessened if someone else is with you, ready to back you up at a moment's notice.

It’s true, you’ve only met Fox today. But his presence is steady, safe, and you get the sense that he would stay without question and without hesitation. But you also don’t want to become his burden.

“You’re not,” he states, hooking his helmet to his belt. “And I’m not. Come on, let’s go find your ride.”

And that’s exactly what he does. 

He leads you out towards the pick-up point, and when the speeder gets there, he verifies the plates, opens the door, and helps you inside, waiting patiently for your guide dog to tuck in her tail before beginning to let it close. Before it does though, before it drives away and you’re left wondering if and when you’ll ever see him again, he speaks, his voice low and carrying the softest, lightest undertone of teasing.

“See you around, mesh’la.”

It takes you a moment, but as you drive off, the echo of the words you had jokingly thrown over your shoulder at him just this morning flashes through your memory, and before you know it, you’re tipping your head back against the headrest of the seat, quietly laughing to yourself, uncaring of the driver giving you a funny look from the corner of his eye as he picks up speed, driving away from the Senate building.

You’re still smiling as the speeder rounds the corner, and the building, as well as Marshall Commander Fox, disappears from view.

If you like and enjoy this story, please consider dropping a reblog, as you might help someone else find something they enjoy just as much. Thank you :-) and thank you to @strangergraphics-archive for such cute puppy dividers

[whooambouttamakeanameformyself]

Dating Crowley includes...

When you started dating Crowley, you had no idea exactly what would happen. Boy were you in for a surprise....

Warnings: fluff, angst, cussing, trust issues, talks of marriage.

(Let me know if you want any of these Headcanons to have their own story!)

~~~~~~~~~~

First date:

Crowley actually had to ask you out several times over the course of four months before you actually said yes.

The first date was honestly a little over the top. He took you to an extremely upscale restaurant, insisting that it was nothing.

If you don't or can't drink he won't shame you, he simply orders you something else to drink before ordering himself some form of alcohol.

If you do drink he'll order the most expensive bottle of wine.

He showered you with compliments, though he was very confused when you looked down at the table after every compliment.

You brushed it off, telling him you were just tired. He obviously didn't believe you, but chose to drop it.

When the date was over, Crowley took you home, giving you a quick goodbye kiss on the cheek with a soft "Thank you for going out with me". Then he was gone.

This whole situation was confusing. Usually Crowley was one to do anything in his power to get what he wanted, worrying only about himself. But tonight... This whole date... He was doing nothing but complimenting you and making sure you were comfortable... You didn't understand.

You shrugged off your confusion, deciding to go to bed, absolutely sure you'd never see him again after tonight.

But you did....

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Second date.

He appeared at your doorstep two weeks later, holding a bouquet of deep red roses.

You froze when you opened the door and saw him standing there.

He gave you a small smile and a "Hello, love."

You began to stutter out a response but he cut you off, handing you the roses as he began to apologize for being gone so long.

"It's okay.." you responded softly.

He asked you on another date and you agreed without hesitation.

This date was much calmer, like he'd paid attention to your reaction to the first date.

This date was a simple walk through the park at night.

You had no reason to be scared of being out so late at night since you were with the king of hell, someone who wouldn't hesitate to kill someone if they made you uncomfortable.

You both talked for two full hours as you walked.

~~~~~~~~~

Crowley gives you roses at least once a week.

He loves bringing you down to hell, having you sit on his lap while he sits on his throne.

Being a tailor when he was a human, he loves to make you clothes that fit your exact body type.

He loves having his hands on you at all times, it could be just holding your hand, it could be a hand on your waist, it doesn't matter what it is, he loves it.

Speaking of hand holding, the reason why he loves it so much is because he wasn't able to do it when he was human, no matter how much he wanted to.

He loves to watch you indulge in your hobbies. You do art? Can he watch you draw? Oh! You like to write? Can he read what you're writing? Even if you just like taking pictures with your phone, he wants to look at each and every photo.

Despite his position in hell and how he treats other people, this demon is one gentle and attentive lover.

Crowley constantly checks up on you, making sure you've eaten.

Crowley is a major cuddler! He enjoys physical touch, but yours just feels so different to him and he loves it! *

Literally almost cried the first time you snuggled up to him.

Yes, he acts all big and tough, but this man just wants to be loved, and I'm talking real, genuine, passionate love.

He does tend to get upset, yelling at demons, yelling at the Winchesters, yelling at everyone. But never once has he yelled at you, he'd hate himself forever if he ever did.

Crowley will kill for you. (Let's be honest, he probably already has, but he won't ever admit it to you.)

After a month of dating he proposes to you. It's not that he didn't like waiting, he has an eternity to wait. He knows you're a mortal and don't have as long as he does, so he wants to do everything with you.

~~~~~~~~~~

Speaking of being mortal.... You were on a hunt with the Winchesters and Crowley popped in just in time to watch a rogue demon attack you, leaving you in the ground bleeding.

Cue pissed off king of hell.

He could let you bleed out.

But he doesn't

Choosing instead, to use his powers as king to turn you into a demon.

He just couldn't lose you... Not the only person who ever truly loved him.

He panics for a bit when you stop breathing, thinking it didn't work.

But it did, and you start to breathe again causing a wave of relief to wash over him.

You were alive.... He wasn't alone again..

~~~~~~~~~~

He asks (begs) you to move down to hell with him.

When you finally say yes, his excitement is very visible on his face.

Getting to have you by his side every day is a dream come true.

Hello everyone! I know it's been a while and I'm quite out of practice, but I hope you enjoyed this! Thanks for reading!

My requests are still open!

[hedwig221b]

Hi! Love everything you do and all your gorgeously crafted fics. If you haven’t already answered, what’s your writing process like? Your last story was so good I actually started jotting down ideas, brainstorming. It’s the closest I’ve gotten to writing in years. The thought of actually doing it though can be daunting. How you process a story idea into and take it from an idea to the great stories we get to read??

Thank you! It may just be the greatest pleasure for a writer to inspire another to write. I am taking your hand - and I hope you feel its warmth just like my gratitude - and pouring all of my inspiration to you 💗 I hope you get sooo inspired to write and share the excitement of getting to create

I feel like I'm going to rant so I'll hide it under the cut. Major spoilers for Yes To Heaven, as I'm gonna give it as an example.

1. I usually just start thinking about one scene or a single concept, maybe a couple, and then think: oh, this could become something tangible. You gotta catch that scene in your head and really taste it, look around the characters (where they are, when, what universe), try to envision it in your head like a movie; look inside the characters, what are they feeling, like, right now, what their thoughts are, what are they saying? At this point, usually the idea starts to grow into my mind so deep that the only way to get rid of it is to write. Otherwise, it would drive me insane.

Example: with Yes To Heaven, it started with one scene where Stiles is surrounded with alphas, and everyone wants him, everyone looks at him and stumbles all over themselves to help him. And Stiles is blushing and beautiful and wondering what's all this for. And Derek in the corner, glaring at everyone and seething.

2. Ok, now it's time for the good old record scratch and the "you're probably wondering how I got here". I sort of step away from the scene: one step into the past and one into the future. I usually get really quickly to the "oh so THIS is the story, okay...". So you got the vague feeling of the plot.

Example: I literally started to think: why would Derek not intervene? Why would the alphas circle around Stiles and want him? What would Derek do, bc he can't simply stand aside and watch the vultures peck at his Stiles. Oh, Stiles is an omega. What if he was a rare omega? The only way Derek wouldn't intervene is if he didn't have the same reasons to circle Stiles. He differs from others. He's a bodyguard. But he intervenes in the end. Why?

3. And then, of course, you get the feel of the story. Ah, this is a story about beautiful Stiles breaking Derek's control and everything he knew about himself (sort of, in the most simple sense).

Then I get boring and go look at the trusted three act plot structure. I know there are a lot of plot structures out there, but this is the most common one and simple to follow. (I'm dying to explore other plot structures tbh, they look intriguing)

Once at the structure, I usually go for the big guns and straight up start thinking about the climax of the story bc I love drama.

Characters need to break. Something about them needs to: their body, their mind, their worldview, their very core and morals and beliefs. The climax is what your story will be remembered for, the very nail-biting tension at the height of it and the inevitable drop into the abyss. Characters need to change, that's why we follow the stories of them.

Not gonna lie, I don't struggle with this part, I'm always there for the ultimate angst, so idk how to tell you to get there.

Example: Stiles' hesitant trust for Derek shatters when Derek sends him back to the Institute. He didn't expect it and it is the worst betrayal for him. Stiles breaks. Derek breaks as well, bc Stiles rejects him. It changes both of them: Derek becomes ruthless (he could've killed Deaton from the beginning, but something always stopped him until now); Stiles, after Derek comes back for him, lets the trust to flourish, and he becomes content. For the first time in his life, Stiles has someone he can trust to come back for him and keep their promises. Derek would never leave Stiles - and that's the resolution for both of them.

At this point, I really see what the story is truly about: trust and its fragility, the false safety of feeling like you have that trust when you have nothing but the shadow of it.

Now I know what everything has to be about. The theme (trust, in my case) should be like the sun that shines upon all of them and soaks into every corner of the story. Everything should lead you step by step to the resolution of the theme. You don't have to focus every single sentence on it, but it should be there, always. Like the sun. You don't notice it, but it's still there.

4. Then, you have to think about the backstory. You really have to think why are they doing what they do, where do they come from, what lead them to where they are now. The backstory starts waaaaay before the tale does, but you have to develop it (because some if not most traumas come from childhood/adolescence).

Example: why is it so important to Stiles that someone comes for him? (everyone left him before, his mother and father). Why does Derek want Stiles so bad? (Stiles needs him to survive, Stiles is not afraid of him, Stiles accepts him as he is)

5. Now that I have the beginning and the climax, I usually follow the three acts points (you can create more acts, just keep raising the stakes and the tension). How do they meet, what creates the spark between them, the attraction and the conflict, what makes them fall in love, where does that love lead to?

6. Not gonna lie, more often than not I don't know how to end things. I get to the climax and just sit there staring at the wall, like, now what? The answer for me is to go to the beginning and make the ending reflect it but in a new light: either sweet, or bitter, or anything in between. It puts a nice bow to your ending, ties all ends, closes all arcs and creates a nice contrast.

Maybe, there's a false climax (like, with Stiles sleepwalking out of his father’s house alone at night and Derek nearly tearing John to shreds bc of it (it's just another push to him keeping Stiles solely to himself in the end)). You get a little breather before shit really hits the fan (the tension keeps climbing; maybe not with the angst but instead with sex or a side plot drama).

About the stakes: your character needs to lose something to change. Because, otherwise, how else do you make the change worth anything at all? You decide what the loss is, something good or bad depending on the story; the loss of a loved one? an old misconception? a harmful habit? a good habit? entire world?? life??? You also get to decide whether the character does it willingly. The change becomes valuable only if it costs something.

Example: Stiles letting go of his Dad (his past and his pain, his burden). He lets Derek take it off his shoulders - and trusts him to carry it right.

Tip: you really should try to tie all ends (unless leaving them open is intentional), at least as much as you can, bc you as an author will probably forget that you haven't told it (bc in your head you know it all), but the reader doesn't know shit and will be like, "And what about A, B, and C? You haven't told us, ergo you're a lazy writer". For me, that's for the editing stage. You have to really think whether you actually told that one important thing or you just thought that everyone would get it out of the context.

Example: I always envisioned Derek with a beard in Yes To Heaven, but after I started editing, I noticed that the first mention of it is at, like, 50k word point or something. Jesus, Hedwig, not everyone can read your mind, explain things! Or how Laura doesn't know that Derek is their pack's Left Hand (had to go back and make Derek and Cora more secretive with his job).

7. Welp, that's kinda it.

There is a lot more that comes to making a story better with different ways of storytelling (I love Chekhov's gun and red herrings, personification and metaphors, to the point where it gets repetitive).

Believe me, I get the dread and the sudden emptiness of mind that overwhelms you when you stare at the empty document. You sit there and stare, and nothing comes out. But, the thing is, instead of focusing on the behemoth of the idea in your head that leans over you like storm clouds, look down and pick at small things.

Maybe create bullet points: the climax scene, the incidents that lead to it, small stuff. Once you write it down, you'll see the whole story better. And it really helps when you're stuck and you don't know what to write next. Look in your notes, at the structure (you can print it or draw it and just write above the points), and you’ll feel more grounded.

Suddenly, it's not this enormous thing, it's this little thing that leads to this other little scene and, oh, they're sucking each other’s dicks.

The grand Idea is your sun that's always there and shines upon you, but you don’t focus on it, you're just making your characters fry pancakes. It will all come together, just... small steps. Small steps that lead you to the top of the Everest. Don’t look at that top, focus on the steps in front of you, else you'll slip into the crater of a burnout.

I hope this was coherent lol. Hope I helped you in some way 💗

[divider link]

[konigsblog]

Idk if you can do this but can you do something like when könig first meets y/n ik it's not much to go off but can you do it? It's fine if you can love your writing

enemies to lovers kinda thing!!! also thank you 💐 i'm super glad you're enjoying my posts :) 🩵;

how did you and könig meet eachother?

könig envied you, the wannabe sniper who couldn't become one because of his size. to make it worse, majority of the soldiers never liked könig themselves because of his strict manner. he'd yell at people for doing things wrong, even if it was a genuine and honest mistake, you were no exception. infact, you were his target.

he expected a hardened soldier who would snarl back at him, silenced as he cut off every attempt to prove yourself right. but instead, there you stood, shaking and trembling and not familiar with the way you were being treated. he swore he could see tears form in your eyes and your bottom lip quivering, he almost felt.. guilty?

you were everything he wanted, a sniper. something he'd dreamed of. you knew nothing about the teams wants and desires and dreams before joining kortac, much to your suprise when he growled at you for the smallest little mistakes, ones he could've made. “nein, wouldn't have made that mistake if i were a sniper.”

- and that's when you realised, everyone who told you that he was jealous, was right. he couldn't help the way his hands shook with anger and jealousy when he saw you training, even if he was a better fit for the role, it would never have been allowed. and he only hated you more when you asked him for help, of course you need help, you're fucking useless, he should've been the sniper.

and he won't bother helping you. one time you asked, tears already welling in your eyes out of pure frustration, him beside you, seeing as he hit every. single. fucking target. he wanted to see you cry and leave the military, this wasn't a place for you. “könig, can you please help me, i'm struggling.” he grabbed you and pulled you from the floor by your neck, like a mother cat would with her babies, yet he wasn't so loving about it..

pushing you back down onto the hard concrete, making you grit your teeth, hiding the pain that came. he knew you would snitch on him, or tell someone who would tell their commander and captain, he'd be gone in a matter of days. that's when he panicked, started getting more anxious before pulling you aside one day, and with desperation in his voice - just like how you were whilst training - begged you not to say or tell anyone.

you contemplated, you didn't enjoy how you were treated, and you didn't enjoy being stuffed into a small storage closet with him begging you. könig fully expected you to shake your head, and tell. you walked away, yet not saying anything. weeks passed and he became curious on why you never wanted to speak, finding you packing your bags and taking off your gear. “what are you doing?” his voice is a mixture of curiosity, and buried worry. he didn't actually want you to leave, the team needed you, a part of him needed you.

“i don't think this job is fit for me, you're right.” your smile is fake and the only reason you wore it was to hide how you were about to sob, not wanting to seem sensitive. “nein, no you're not leaving.” your ears perked at his sudden change of attitude. “i'm jealous, maus..” könig grumbled quietly, embarrassed. “i'm insecure that i can't be a sniper, i just take my anger out on others, i'm so sorry..” he won't meet your eyes, avoiding your gaze knowing he'll feel horrible for telling you the truth. “if you're so sorry, look at me when you say it.” your voice is no longer soft and instead strained, signing when he hesitates, finally looking at you.

“i am sorry, maus. please don't go.” you click your tongue, speaking loudly before dropping your bags. “alright, stop acting like how you do, and deal with your issues and problems like how a sniper would.” you turn back and head into the office, your harsh tone feeling like it cut his heart in half. but you were right after all... your captain was confused but gladly let you stay after telling him a lie, unpacking your stuff and resting on your bed.

knock, knock, knock... your door thumped, just like your heart did, jumping from the bed and twisting the door handle. of course, it was that tall, rude and brooding operator. “i want to make it up to you, will you let me show you how I really am?” one nod was all he needed, smiling and handing you his number.

he took you out on a date, as a friend. but afterwards, you felt like you met a new person, a different man. he spoke to you with genuine kindness, pulling you down onto his bed and sloppily making out with you, sucking on your neck and kissing your jaw. you weren't a friend, perhaps a love intrest... horangi was surprised to see you to making out messily one night, the figure taking up the entire doorway, flashing the light at you before gasping and locking his door.

suddenly become closer to the man you'd once felt anger and sadness to, teaching eachother tactics, finally helping you. a lot of soldiers considered the possibilities and conspiracies of what happened between you two now seeing you both acting like an old married couple.

[missweener]

Review- The Man Who Forgot

The Man Who Forgot- SlightWeasel (250K, E) *spoiler warning*

Sorry for the late review! Accidentally ghosted ya'll for a long while before remembering that I had to write this...

I've always been a fan of amnesia fics, so I was fairly excited to read this one. However, I only like it when it's done right. With these sorts of fics, it's really difficult to perfect an ending. Either the character's memories come back, or they don't. In this case, Harry's memory of his 10 years with Draco never does.

I enjoyed the beginning of the sequence. The agony that Draco goes through when he realises that his husband's memories were flawed. It was raw, it garnered sympathy and pity. Especially since Draco was pregnant with Harry's child, and Harry didn't want to have anything to do with him. When Draco, who was heavily pregnant, was bent over the crib and sobbing his eyes out, I lowkey shed a tear too.

I also liked the way the writer portrayed Harry's hesitance to retrieve his old memories, by dumping the remembering solution out the window, or by avoiding the Pensieve full of Draco's memories. Overall, I found the storytelling well thought out.

My only issue with this entire fic was how long it was. Some parts of the fic were just sooo boring to get through, for example the Christmas tree decorating chapter. Although it did give some background on Harry's "old" character, I found that it was rather wordy and irrelevant. I'm trying to find out whether or not Harry is gonna recover his memories, not watch ya'll dilly dally with some owl ornaments! When it comes to amnesia fics, I personally prefer a more fast paced story, as I look forward to find out what happens next. Sure, it can be slow burn (eg. Alucinato), but every action has to have some sort of impact for it to actually be worth reading. I can't be sitting through 10000 words for us to only end up back to square one. Once or twice is fine, but this fic was full of these dead ends.

I skipped a majority of the fic, because at some point I was so tired of just reading the same thing over and over again. Harry and Draco does something, they bond, Harry relapses and hates Draco again, Draco is in shambles, relationship deteriorates, Harry shows concern towards Draco, they make up, repeat. YAWN! There is no development. Okay, fine, this is a slowburn, but still it was done so boring. Nothing made my heart race, or my heart drop. It was just, meh...

Anyway, I could just be hating for no reason, as I didn't actually fully read this fic. Feel free to correct me on any false information, and if you actually liked this fic please tell me why.

Reading this fic was a chore. It was brutally boring despite it being tagged amnesia AND mpreg. 2/10. Unless you pay me I will not be rereading this.

Till the next! XO

[tarisilmarwen]

Rebels Rewatch: "Crawler Commandeers"

The calm before the storm...

I actually do not have a live reaction version of this one, huh.

Ryder's misgivings with their circumstances showing even more. You know, I bet if they could have avoided showing footage of him helping in the attack on the Dome in the finale trailers, they could have sold the red herring of his "defection" even more.

You know, really make us worry for a moment there. XD

What's with that look, Sabine? Lol.

A very slow and strained Ezra's Theme in minor key as they observe the ore crawler here.

And a similarly strained and altered "Shenanigans". We are just putting all the serious musical modifications on the leitmotifs today.

Meanwhile at the Dragging Their Feet HQ...

Interesting that they specifically cite Thrawn's presence as a reason to be hesitant to attack. The man spooks them so much they're afraid to move. Anything they do can wind up giving something away to him that he can use later to destroy them. This is reminiscent of their paralysis when confronted with the knowledge of the Death Star in Rouge One. The Rebel Alliance know they're hopelessly outgunned, they know it's a hard fight, but it isn't until you're actually staring down the barrel of the full huge might of the Empire that you realize just how big and overwhelming the threat is.

And it's hard to figure out what to do in the face of such overwhelming odds. Which is why every so often the Rebellion needed its firebrands and Jedi to reject fear and spurn action into them.

You know... I think Hera told Ezra about the Alliance's long debate over this attack and that's what made him decide that Thrawn needed to be taken off the board permanently. Which is one reason why he was okay with sacrificing himself to take Thrawn out.

Ezra with another cute "Lookit my girl go!" look, and in my head I'm hearing his bragging, "Those troopers are in trouble now." from "Ghosts of Geonosis".

The way she effortlessly takes out those two droids is pretty impressive.

Lol the Trandoshan is listening to Zeb's favorite band, it sounds like.

Once again showing off the smaller more wirey members of the species. Wonder how many mental comparisons Ezra was making. (He worked briefly with Bossk in the junior novel Ezra's Gamble, Bossk being a much taller and heavier Trandoshan than this Mining Guild shrimp.)

Ha ha Ezra just straight up clotheslining him, awesome.

Big fan of the absolute chagrin in Ezra's face as he attempts his bluff here, he already knew this effort was doomed before he started lol.

Seevor's so offended too.

You guys really should have knocked this guy out from the outset. Just saying.

The steam effects are perfect. But then mist and cloud has always been a strength of this show.

Hi Vizago!

Lolol and I just thought of how this had to sound to Kanan all of a sudden he hears this loud familiar voice, he can't even see how excited Vizago is to see him but his WTF expression is perfect.

Oh and here's one of my favorite Zeb moments this season!

First giving him a badass entrance--"Drop the whip and step away from my friend you knuckle-brained lizard!" is an amazing line, I should rewatch this episode more often I'd completely forgotten it--and then we proceed into a very knock-down bare-knuckle outright brawl between Zeb and someone finally in his weight class.

The way Ezra just grabs Seevor's collar and drags him is sending me.

Seriously though, just stun him. Your blaster does have a stun function yes? Does it not work on Trandoshans?

Gilligan Cut to Kanan and Zeb clearly NOT being fine lol.

The comedy is On Point this episode.

I've already mentioned how I love this brawl so I'll just enjoy it and move on.

Meanwhile on Yavin, Mon Mothma is putting an official name to the Empire's habit of withdrawing its own forces before launching a major attack. "Protocol 13". The complete evacuation of an occupied world by Imperial forces.

So now you're left to Fridge Horror exactly which planet is on the chopping block. Chandrilla? Ghorman? Alderaan? The official timeline (which I don't ascribe to anyway because of NUMEROUS problems and inconsistencies) places this episode very close to Year Zero, within smelling distance of the Battle of Yavin, so the Empire's new plan is almost assuredly the Death Star.

Anyway Hera's convinced to go in and make her speech of hope. It's only too bad that they're facing Thrawn for this sortie. He keeps things at the Alliance at an impasse with his presence. Can't let his TIE Defenders go into production, can't attack his forces outright.

The Immovable Object to Ezra's Unstoppable Force.

Vizago and Hondo would get along immaculately. Actually kind of weird that Vizago's developed into a Hondo-like personality when he was so cold and chilling at the beginning of Season One but again I point to "The Empire makes all other threats into miniscule nuisances" and also he's clearly been in contact with Ezra too long, everyone softens around him lol.

My son with his impressive glares again. <3

And the plan is once again to bluff the Empire, and it's mostly a good plan, aside from the fact that they still haven't stunned the damn crawler captain.

Oh good! Zeb went and knocked him out again.

Don't mind me I just like this shot of Ezra readying his lightsaber.

And Seevor has turned internal saboteur. Man's dedicated to his job.

Sabine looking entirely too amused to make Ezra go in the vents, just like the old days.

But also:

*CRIES IN FINALE*

These shafts don't look as ah... sanitary as the ones Ezra's used to crawling through.

It was a nice touch that Ezra totally knew Seevor was there before he could attack. Force Sense warned him, it's implied.

HELLO AND WELCOME TO THE HORROR MOVIE PORTION OF THIS EPISODE.

When these clips were shown in the trailer I genuinely thought Seevor was Ruhk it was so hard to see him.

Again, Ezra senses the attack a hair before it happens.

People weirdly thought Ezra went briefly Dark Side again right here? Because they thought he manipulated his dropped saber into Seevor's foot path, sending him into the furnace, plus the dark humor comment later.

...I both do and don't see it. I see how it would certainly look like Ezra deliberately moved his saber somehow to make him slip but... I dunno I can't square it away with how he's been characterized for the most part. I'm going to settle on a maybe.

Sabine looks so happy for him, awww.

OHHHHH NO NO NO, SHOW. SHOW. YOU HAD TO KNOW WHAT YOU WERE DOING WHEN YOU HAD EZRA SAY, "YOU CAN COUNT ON US." WHILE LOOKING SIGNIFICANTLY AT SABINE.

Hhhhhhngnghhfhfffff my heart I ache now. Everything is so hopeful and optimistic it huuuuuuuurts.

This is a fun one. A bit silly in places, but entertaining. Lots of good moments for characters and unlike "The Wynkahthu Job" I don't want to slap anyone upside the head.

[ceruleanvermillion]

AU Where Zhongli and Dan Heng are brothers

This is just a very messy brainstorm session. Also some star rail and genshin spoilers. there might be leaks? I dont really know but just in case, be warned.

Anyway

It has to be an AU, since these two already have super complicated lore on their own lmao. Anyway the gist is that a long time ago these two are like super powerful immortals, but then they are separated because of *mysterious reasons*. Now, they can sense each other being alive, but like that's it. They don't know how the other is doing, or the state of one another. They're much older than they seem. There's also a backstory I'm building for their pre-canon brotherhood story and lore but that's a whole other can of worms. For another post, maybe.

Regardless. That is obviously not how the story should end. So, they'll have to meet. Some technicalities: It's hard to compare honkai and genshin power levels, because they're essentially different kinds of games. Fischl and Keqing got major power boosts in honkai in that one crossover event a while ago.

BUT. Meeting is possible. Thank you, Welt. Thank you, Sumeru lore drop about descenders. Lumine and Aether are Travelers, come on, it should be possible.

So. How should they meet? Should it be in Zhongli's Universe? Dan Heng's universe? Or a third part Universe? Well. One Interesting thing I have noticed, is their relationship with "Memory". Zhongli has really good, near-perfect memory. Dan Heng is running away from his past- he is implied to not remember most of his past memories.

So I established this: At the present moment, Zhongli remembers almost everything. Dan Heng does not. With this we can conclude that for the story to move, Zhongli must be the first to take action, despite the fact that Dan Heng is currently in a magic space train. So, most likely it will be in the world of Star Rail. New question: How does Zhongli arrive?

We're getting into speculative fanfic lore here. I'm better with Genshin Lore than I am with Honkai Lore, so don't hesitate to correct me if I make mistakes. I'll italicize it.

Zhongli is a deity. He is still divinity and a gnosis does not affect that, unlike how a herrscher no longer is a herrscher when the don't have the core. So if Welt can, theoretically Zhongli can too. We can interpret the gnosis as his last remaining tie to Teyvat- without it, now he can multiverse hop easier.

Side Note: At this point we don't know anything abt Zhongli's actual origins or what he's capable of.

So maybe he can open a vortex portal thing. Zhongli is really good with space magic- and him rescuing xiao also proves that he can do that for someone else. Venti can make vortexes and stuff. So maybe he enlists Venti's help. Venti is equally sus, so its only fair he gets a part lmao. So they do a lot of research- and when he's ready, he can finally jump.

Again, this is still tentative, but i do want to explore some possibilities.

Oh- but. There has to be a sort of event catalyst, right? Why? Why is this story unfolding this way? Why is it that one remembers and the other forgets?

The intention had always been for Zhongli to remember and for Dan Heng to forget but...there needs to be a midpoint. one can't do all the heavy lifting, it won't be a fun story if that's the case. So. Dan Heng's arc centers around him trying to remember- because he realizes these dreams that he has recently that are actually his memories are very different than the regular ones about Jing Yuan and Blade and the Luofu. Zhongli's arc centers around him trying to get to Dan Heng.

So. What is the goal of this story? What does it want to achieve?

Reuniting, that's the main main goal. This is the consistent point in the story- the plot is currently still tentatively being brainstormed, but changes aside-

They Have To Meet. These two must meet. preferably in an emotional way.

A bit of fanfic made-up lore details that I may want to include (as of now):

The world of Teyvat is an outlier universe. It is strange, it stands out, it remains in it's own little corner. Basically, Teyvat is just Really Really Weird. Partly inspired but how Genshin impact is kind of an outlier amongst the current Hoyoverse games. Like even Tears of Themis is set on earth.

The separation can be said to be because of Zhongli. Of course, the true events is far more complex, and me personally, I don't think it really is his fault- but Zhongli is the catalyst for this to happen. His brother doesn't blame him, and again, real events far more complex- but he blames himself, kind of. He does not regret it, but it also provides motivation for his character- and of course, the lore goes deep. Zhongli is objectively my favourite genshin character- and I have theorized many things about him.

The story is partly kind of loosely inspired by chinese drama love between fairy and devil. There is no intended romance to be included in the story, but certain themes I intend to include.

Honkai Star Rail spoilers/leaks(?) idk if this is actually a leak but Dan Heng has gone through several incarnations since the separation. Zhongli is Zhongli. Dan Heng and Zhongli are at their core magical and powerful, although at present, both are weaker than how they had been. However, maybe they can still access some of what they used to be able to do? idk

They're close brothers and they're wholesome and I love them (Not Tentative/Definitely Confirmed)

But yeah tldr so much of this brainstorm is still tentative and might be changed accordingly to what works best, but I did enjoy exploring several possibilities in the plot.

[arino4u]

appreciating the unique quirks of the many PSP models

Someone posted a picture of a PSP ad from back in the day, and it inspired me to crack my brain open and dump a buncha knowledge of mine into this here post!

So, let's talk PSP's!

This here is my PSP, or at least the one that survived long enough to be considered that. It's the vibrant blue PSP 3000, which was the last revision of the PSP that stuck to the original design. Speaking of designs, lets jump right into breaking down the several major PSP redesigns!

(I took some pics from this video btw y2u.be/EkNXNmgPCoc)

First, you've got the PSP 1000, the eldest

This particular one in a very sleek white :0

Now the PSP 1000 is real good. Unlike a lot of launch edition consoles, they pretty much had it down from the get go. All the basic bits and bobs you expect in a PSP are in here, with the only special characteristics of the 1000 being its heft.

That's right, the PSP 1000 is chunky! I do not say this to make fun, however, because the extra weight makes the 1000 really comfortable to hold. Look, without being too crass, the PSP has a massive ass- I mean look at this size comparison!!

I AM ACTUALLY JEALOUS OF A VIDEO GAME DEVICES ASS- WHAT??

ahem- Point is, the PSP's extra heft gave it... I hesitate to use the term love handles but- WHY CAN'T I BE NORMAL ABOUT THIS WE'RE MOVING ON

to the PSP 2000!

In a delightful blue! Similar to mine, but not as pretty :P

The PSP 2000 is notable for a couple reasons. Mainly because it introduced the new skinnier form factor that they pretty much stuck with for the rest of the consoles run (until they radically changed the entire design, but I'm not going there today).

The slim design is alright. While I'm no proponent of unrealistic body goals, I can see why they shed some of the PSP's pounds. The dumpy made it a little less than ideal in the pocket, and the console was also much lighter to boot. I mean it too! The PSP dropped from 280 grams to 189. That's 91 grams lighter!

The real great thing about the PSP 2000 though is that it's around this time that Sony decided to whip out the crayons and start going wild with the colors.

There were simple, yet elegant colors, like Lavender and Mint Green

But more interestingly, we started to see more multicolored themed PSP's, like...

This sleek Gundam one

This beautiful Monster Hunter one

And, last but not least, The Simpsons one!!!

"that is so effin' badass"

Awww yeah! The wide array of color options was certainly not unique to the PSP as far as handheld consoles go, but I'm such a freakazoid for this design- I can't get over how cute all these different PSP's are.

Whenever I see all the different colored PSP's, I imagine an eclectic group of people riding the Yamanote line, with the one connective link between them being the fact that they're passing the time during their train ride by dinking around with a PSP. You might even be able to tell at a passing glance something about the persons character as you notice the color they chose, or maybe you're just looking too far into it. After all, what would somebody tell about you, rocking your Simpsons PSP. That you like the Simpsons? That you like the Simpsons enough to have committed to staring at a Simpsons themed device every day on the train? Is that something you feel you should base your entire identity around? in Tokyo, Japan circa 2006? ...The answer is sure, why not! The Simpsons rules!

And so does the PSP 3000!

In a silver that reminds me James Bonds car... Oddly specific, that one

Now, I'm putting a lot of faith in you right now to spot any kind of difference between this device, and the last device. To be fair, I was putting a lot of faith in you to spot any kind of difference between the last device and the first device- but I digress.

I think the majority of people would agree that the 3000 is the best PSP. It's basically the 2000, only with a WAY better screen. The contrast between light and dark is much better, the colors are more vibrant and vivid, the awful ghosting effect from previous models is all but gone- it's wonderful!

And no, I didn't mention the ghosting effect in talking about the previous models, and that's mostly because well- have you seen what the competitions screens were like at the time?

It's like I'm playing a video game in a Zach Snyder movie...

Yeah- the standards were low as heck, which makes the PSP 3000 that much more impressive! It really is a nice looking screen even still, and I speak on good authority because, well, this was the model PSP I owned and used for years!

As previously established, I owned the Vibrant Blue 3000, but there were tons of other fun colors too!

You had, as before, simple but elegant colors like Blossum Pink and White Blue

but also the SUPER fun themed ones, which started to get cool as heck with the 3000!

You've got the Hatsune Miku one, of course

ok this one is sorta underwhelming, tbh

This 'so classy it's criminal' Monster Hunter one

don't know who I was quoting- but the gold highlights- AAAAA

And there was even a One Piece themed PSP!

Which also happens to look quite similar to the MonHun one! Just with less class (sorry luffy)

At the end of the whole PSP lifecycle we wound up with so many unique colors and variants that just collecting the different colors of all the different PSP's could be entire decade long endeavors in it of themselves! I'd like to say that one day I could own them all but likeeeee-

I think student loans will probably prohibit me from ever being so frivolous, though it's fun to dream!

or is it depressing...

In any case, that wraps up my PSP worship appreciation post for now!

Keen PSP appreciators may have noticed my failure to mention the PSP GO or the PSP Street. I am aware of those 2 revisions, but I chose not to include them because:

1. I've never seen either of them in the flesh before, so I have no personal experience with them and thus couldn't confidently speak on their ergonomics or screen quality

2. They only had 2 colors each, which is lame and not fun!

and 3. It's 3 AM and I have to get up early tomorrow- I kinda wrote this all on a whim because I saw someone post a picture of a PSP and it put my brain in hyperdrive

ANYWAYS

I hope you enjoyed this slightly structured ramble! I will leave you with a fanmade commercial for the PSP I found on youtube dot com

hehe, 2005 was nuts-

goodnight :)

[dracocheesecake]

Hii how are doingg

What do you think of a trope(?) like Kai and scholar travel alongside? Sure Kai is not that stupid or whatever if we try to make fun of this contrast. Nevertheless I find it hilarious if Kai would say something jokingly (or mock the scholar someone lol) but the scholar, in turn, develops a theme and goes into philosophy so Kai ends up getting an existential crisis💀💀 Since then Kai tries not to bring smthg that would bring scholar into such ramble. Buuut imagine if Kai lets it to tortue someone lskssksksklld like here’s my secret weapon, you won’t be the same person after they start their ‘thing’😈

And yeah the scholar is extremely smart but tiny bunny and weak :>

Oh oh imagine them arguing about past times where scholar tells Kai how things stood because dude u know I studied that sht. And Kai tries to prove him that things were different because btch I LIVED THERE I KNOW BETTER😂

I’m interested of your opinion of that :D

I like it! I think Kai is actually educated (it was very common for generals in ancient China, and he does speak pretty eloquently, if dramatic). Though I think he finds scholars themselves to be pretentious, so he wouldn't hesitate to try to belittle and annoy the bunny scholar as much as possible.

But oh! How the tables turn! The bunny is much more clever (and annoying) than Kai thought! It starts when the bunny brings up one of his past victories.

Kai, preparing to brag: "Oh, that battle. I remember it well. See, we were almost outnumbered-"

Scholar: "Nuh-uh."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'NUH-UH'?! HOW ARE YOU GOING TO TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED BACK THEN?! I WAS THERE I FOUGHT IN THAT BATTLE HOW DARE YOU-"

Kai would then calm himself, pick the rabbit up by their ears, and then take them to the scene of the battle. He plops them down, pointing out all of the places of the major happenings, sketching out every single detail, practically re-enacting the battle from memory; all the while the bunny follows him around, excitedly taking notes and murmuring to themselves how these details weren't in the texts they studied!-However, even after all of that:

"But you're still wrong, of course; the 34th battalion came from the east, not the north. Your side couldn't have won this battle, not with that number of soldiers flanking you."

General Kai's eyes widen. His jaw nearly drops in disbelief; how could one little rabbit be so stubborn as to argue with a literal immortal about what happened back in his own time?- No, this isn't going to slide.

They argue for ages over it, and then Kai finally snaps. He grinds his teeth. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't step on you and end this argument right now. Permanently. "

The bunny smiles up at him, unperturbed. "Because then I'd know I'm right."

The bull snorts, then shakes his head, holding up his hooves as if the little scholar convinced him.

"Alright, alright, that's it: I'll spare you for one more day- just to prove that you're wrong, so I can rub it into that smug little twitching nose of yours," he says, flicking it for emphasis.

And from there on they're pretty much stuck together.

Ok, but also imagine Kai provokes them on purpose by pretending to be dumber than he actually is or acting like something that is clearly wrong is a fact (Ex: "Taoism is the study of down. That's why it's called 'down-ism'. Of course it is! You claim to be a scholar?!") I can just see a scene- maybe laying out by a campfire, Kai laying there with his cheek propped up on his elbow, watching the bunny scholar trying to write their findings fervently by the flickering firelight- and then Kai glances over their work, smirks, and says something completely incorrect and just totally wrong. The scholar's instinct kicks in, they immediately try to correct him, but Kai's smirk only grows, and he doubles down, telling the bunny that they're just an idiot, and that actshually, Taoism is the study of down; they just clearly didn't study it.

The bunny starts raising their voice, even stepping closer just to wag a finger at Kai; but the bull snorts and nudges them over with his forehead. "No, you're wrong," Kai says, "and nothing you say will ever convince me otherwise." He's grinning, now, those green eyes glowing with satisfaction and amusement; but even then, the bunny knowing that Kai's just trying to get on their nerves doesn't stop them, and they again try to make it into a contest over who can annoy the other more.

Just saying I think this is an adorable idea hshdhdhdhsdhd

[alciefromwonderland]

Hey, so uh!

I wrote a little one act play sort of thing. I'll have it under the cut if anyone wants to read!

Amelia - a woman in her mid 20's

Danny - a man in his mid-late 20's

[The scene opens on Amelia standing before a gravestone, a small bundle of flowers on top. The stage is almost completely bare otherwise. It is a cold winter's day in a cemetery. Amelia stares down at the grave, a look of sadness and contemplation on her face. She is wearing a sleeveless dress and rubs her arms absentmindedly.]

[Danny enters. He is dressed in a black suit and white button up shirt. Neither of them is dressed for the weather, but Danny seems far less bothered by it. He approaches Amelia who glances at him before turning back to the grave.]

Danny: Did you know him?

[Pause.]

Amelia, shaking her head: ...I don't think so.

Danny: (laughs) Don't think so? You're not sure?

[Pause. Amelia shifts uncomfortably.]

Amelia: ...I don't think I knew him.

[Beat. They both look quietly at the grave.]

Amelia: Did you?

Danny: Mm... [Pause. He contemplates his answer for a moment.] Not really. Heard about him, though.

Amelia: Yeah?

Danny: Yeah. Nothing too special or impressive or big, exciting news or anything. I mean, you can find it in the papers, but it's just because you know...they gotta report on all the deaths and everything.

Amelia: Nothing special? He was...what? Didn't even make it to 30. How does someone die that young and it's just discounted as "nothing special"?

Danny: Well, no, I just mean like...he wasn't involved in anything crazy. Just...one of those stupid kids who tried to go swimming before they should've.

[Pause. Amelia nods slowly. It's getting cold. She bunches her shoulders for a moment. Danny looks her over, realizing that she doesn't have a jacket.]

Danny: Here... [Reaches for the buttons on his suit jacket, hesitates, and drops his hands back to his sides.] Uh...listen. You should probably get back home soon. It's way too cold out here for something like that. [He gestures to her dress.] I mean...look, if you're here to see someone in particular, I can maybe help you find them.

Amelia: No, I'm... [Pause. She shakes her head.] I don't know why I'm here.

[Danny looks at her for a moment, a mix of concern and pity on his face.]

Danny: Okay...well...people don't usually come here without reason. I mean...you know, they come to see someone. They come to just enjoy the quiet. They come to learn or pay respects or to mourn. I mean...did something happen or...?

[Amelia shifts uncomfortably. She doesn't look up at him. He's a stranger and she's not sure what she should tell him, if anything. But he seems willing to listen and that's enough for her to start.]

Amelia: ...everyone I know is gone.

Danny, shocked: G...gone? Like...?

Amelia: No! No, they're not dead. They're just... [Pause.] I don't know who they are anymore.

[During this speech, Amelia slowly turns to Danny without realizing, only coming to her attention when she's looking into his eyes.]

Amelia: I don't...talk to them as often anymore. You know, we...we get busy. We all do. And that's fine. But it's...I mean, whenever I do try to catch up with them, it's like...like they're slowly fading away. Emmy...Emily...wants to be called her actual name now because nicknames are silly and childish. Chris has changed majors five times now and I just...I can't keep up. I thought Sarah and Cindy were engaged - but now she's seeing Gary? I - I haven't even spoken to Gary since we were kids, so I can't even imagine what he is doing, what he likes, who he is - but the...the people they used to be...the people I am friends with, they just...they don't exist anymore. I'm just friends with a bunch of ghosts.

[She realizes she's been staring at him, rambling. She looks down at the ground, pulling her arms in closer.]

Amelia: I'm sorry. [She shakes her head, muttering] So dramatic...

Danny: Hey... don't say that. It's not dramatic.

Amelia: But it is. I mean...I don't know why I'm so upset. They're still around. They're not *dead*, they're just... different.

Danny: Really different, sounds like.

Amelia, nodding slightly and gesturing to the grave: ...feel like I know Daniel here as much as I know...whoever Emily is.

Danny: Well...I dunno about that.

Amelia, shaking her head: (Speaking quickly and shakily) Well, I do. I thought it was just little things at first, but I... there's nothing left. We don't work in the same place. We're not part of the same clubs. Most of us don't live anywhere near each other anymore. I try to invite them over for things that it turns out they don't even enjoy anymore. I...I don't...know them anymore. I don't know if I ever did. I... they're gone. The people I loved are all gone.

[Danny nods. He has things he wants to say, but he doesn't want to burden her more. She's shivering.]

Danny: Tell you what...I'll be here tomorrow. We can talk more...when you come back with a coat and maybe some mittens, okay? I don't want you to freeze out here.

Amelia: ...maybe I do.

[Pause.]

Danny: Sorry, maybe...?

Amelia: Maybe I do. Want to freeze. I live with ghosts anyway. Maybe...maybe I should just join them. [laughs bitterly] I still...still try to bond with them sometimes. Even when they aren't there? I just...pretend they are. I watch our old favorite shows and play the games and keep up with our old bookclub series and I tell myself that I'm not alone, but...

[Danny pauses. He starts to reach out for her. She turns to look at him. She looks desperate and terrified. He drops his hand.]

Danny: My brother died when we were kids. Stayed out in the cold too long. Mom didn't know he was out there. Everyone kinda figured...you know...neglectful mom, couldn't be bothered to take care of her kid... (shrugs) She wouldn't be bothered. But she was.

[He gestures into the distance.]

Danny: The one with the flowers and the little toy car is his. She comes down and replaces the flowers every couple weeks and brings a new car when the one there already gets broken or rusted or lost. She keeps up with birthdays and Christmas and...hell, she went to all the soccer games he would've been in. Cheered for his team and...hung the victory pictures on the fridge as if he were in 'em.

[Pause.]

Danny: I think more people live with ghosts than we realize sometimes.

Amelia: It's different when they're still alive. I can't come here to mourn or...bring gifts.

Danny: No, but...

[He hesitates. He's not sure if he's about to say the right thing.]

Danny: What if you come here to make new friends?

Amelia, laughing: In a graveyard?

Danny, shrugging: You met me here, didn't you?

[Amelia smiles.]

Amelia: ...you said you'll be here tomorrow?

Danny: I will.

[Amelia looks up from the grave to Danny. After a moment, she looks over to the side where Danny had pointed out his brother's grave.]

Amelia, turning back to Danny: Same time?

Danny, smiling: With a jacket next time.

Amelia, smiling: And mittens. I'm Amelia.

Danny: Danny.

[Amelia smiles and briefly looks down at the grave with a curious look. She turns back to Danny.]

Amelia: Well...I'll see you tomorrow, Danny.

Danny: See you tomorrow.

[Exit Amelia.]

[Danny looks at the grave and approaches it. He rests his hand on the slide, sliding it up towards the flowers. His hand stops just before he touches them. He sighs.]

[Lights down. End scene.]

[essskel]

okay i said i'll leave your inbox but i'm a very curious person and like to talk a lot BUT THIS THE LAST TIME I SWEAR i just want to specify and ask one thing.

i meant that i don't like when people label roche as a RACIST monster not if people hate him because he's pro-genocide (that's valid i hate him for that too). it's like 'i'll be mad if you ignore my blorbos flaws but i also get mad if you make him something he isn't' kind of thing.

besides if roche was racist he would actually be irredeemable. and if it's not obvious by now but i only like ves and roche for that reason. they're not motivated by racism despite their horrible job and they can you know work on their mistakes but other blue stripes are just...mehh. good that died i guess.

and this is why i'm curious do you think roche is racist? i got the impression that you're not sure.

Dw I enjoy your commentary!! Below the cut again :))

-> I do think that in the second game Roche makes it pretty clear that his hatred is for the Scoiatael, not non-humans, and by the third, his role as an oppressor is essentially dropped completely and written over. But then, of course….the Scoiatael are a group of Elves trying not to be killed and colonized because of their race. They’re standing up against racial oppression, Roche was fighting to keep them there - even though he or the writers don't see it that way. So … I’d personally agree that while he’s not a racist or a bigot in the classical sense, he IS a major aggressor in a racist institution. So, yeah to me that is racism. Idk, is a racist a person who does racist things, or someone who hates another race? …yes?

The writing is so convoluted though, that’s why you may sense hesitation from me when it comes to blanket statements. Roche isn’t a real guy, he’s written as a narrative, and I don’t think that it's meant to be one of a violent bigot, it’s that of a soldier who’s consumed and internalized every inch of military propaganda he’s ever been served. Racism is part of that, the concept is inseparable and we lose almost everything when people try to erase it, but the ‘is he racist or not’ debate doesn’t move anything forward a ton, to me. The answer to the question (which is yes to me), doesn't really solve the politics of the factional warfare, or how willing an elf would be to accept help from him - I think this is where motive really does matter (Geralt does trust him for a reason). I also think it somewhat flattens the intersection of poverty that his character has a lot to say about.

EDIT: I took out a paragraph about the scoiateal cause I was using in-universe explanations and that doesn't actually matter very much here. CDPR throwing in crazy war crimes for their oppressed people to be guilty of is not legitimate justification for further oppression, its just bad writing. The well-intentioned extremist trope does not equate grey morality. The internal politics and witcher-world rules matter very little compared to the real life implications of the narrative. Roche isn’t real but violent, racist, unsympathetic soldiers who got where they are through their experience with poverty, propaganda, and privilege are. Therefore the way that I talk about these characters should always be with that context in mind. Narrative themes and the statements being made by writers, that’s what I really care about, not so much whether or not a fictional solider would be classified in a fantasy world as being racist towards elves or not.

tldr maybe: I don’t think Roche’s actions are ever truly written to be motivated by racial bigotry, he wants to defend his country, that’s the core of it. But his character - or maybe just the Blue Stripes as a whole - function as a racist, a racist institution, and they represent real militarized racial conflicts. He's oppressing people, and he never lifts a finger to undo that. I think talking about what that means and where that could go (hopefully somewhere better??) is the best we can do with what we have.

[wolfreader]

july 2024 wrap-up - young adult fiction

this month i read six (6) young adult novels.

an ember in the ashes by sabaa tahir 📖 🌟🌟🌟🌟

i was a bit hesitant because extremely hyped young adult fiction rarely works out for me, especially young adult fantasy. however, the new paperback covers intrigued me, i heard good things from people that don't normally like ya fantasy, and it was included in a buy one get one 50% deal, so i went ahead.

it exceeded my expectations!! for ya fantasy, i found the world to be very well realized and the characters very compelling. i felt like i understood them, even when i didn't agree with them, which seems like a low bar but that's because my standards for ya fantasy are astronomically low.

i felt that i really connected with laia and elias in this first installment. laia is motivated by extreme survivor's guilt and elias is motivated by self-preservation, and i'm interested to see how that changes throughout the series. i'm unsure of how much i'm buying their romance quite yet, but i think there's room for something to grow. equally enough room for sabaa tahir to drop the ball. laia and elias have a lot in common but at the same time their views and their desires aren't exactly the same and i can see them coming into major conflict with each other. whether or not i'm on board with them together depends on how tahir handles that conflict.

while i did make many jokes about elias having to learn that his best friend is a liberal, i feel that i've learned enough about helene to be excited for her larger role in the sequels.

the ballad of never after by stephanie garber 📖 🌟🌟🌟

the "evil all along" trope is perhaps the laziest way to resolve a love triangle. like, oh, you can't think of an actual reason why the main character would choose this love interest over the other? you have to make one of them do a complete 180 degree in character to make the other seem like the better option?

seriously, this went from a low four star to a solid three in the literal last chapter. i'm still going to continue with the series eventually, though my disappointment with the ending of this installment did lower its place on my priority list.

other than that, however, i think this series is pretty great. it's certainly overhyped on booktok, as most things are, but i really like the style and the setting. if you enjoy the fairytale aesthetic and you aren't looking for anything too serious, you'll likely enjoy this series.

song of silver, flame like night by amelie wen zhao 📚 🌟🌟🌟

this was on my "24 books to read in 2024" list, and though i had lost interest since the beginning of the year i still want to complete that list, so i picked this up from the library rather than buying it for myself. and boy am i glad i did! quite possibly the most book of all time.

this is an aggressively okay book. it doesn't really stand out among young adult fantasy; this could be any of the many "ya fantasy about a young girl with forbidden magic living under an oppressive regime content to keep her head down, keep herself safe, and achieve her own goals until a personal tragedy (and a mysterious man) flings her into rebellion" that i've read and immediatley forgotten about.

however, that equally means it doesn't stand out in any negative way. the exposition, especially in the first third, is very clunkily conveyed. the worldbuilding is lackluster. the two main characters are very interesting in theory but in execution they're very bland. but those are pretty common issues for young adult fantasy; there wasn't anything glaringly bad about it. there wasn't anything that compelled me to dnf, other than boredom and desire to get onto reading something else, and the writing style was quick and easy enough to read that that wasn't a major problem anyway.

it's a shame, because at the beginning of the year i was very eager to read this, but i can't really recommend it. even i, normally very critical of young adult fantasy, can say with confidence that there are many, many better ya fantasy to spend your time reading.

a torch against the night by sabaa tahir 📖 🌟🌟🌟🌟

i was planning to jump right into city of brass, but because i really didn't enjoy song of silver, flame like night, i wanted to give myself more of a break before i get into a new, adult fantasy series.

very excited to be continuing this series! while i don't think a torch against the night is quite as good as an ember in the ashes, that's a very high bar to reach. there were a few moments that i found a bit odd, but nothing egregious, and those moments themselves were things that might make more sense to me as the series continues and more secrets are revealed.

there was one theory i had about a certain character's backstory that i was genuinely shocked wasn't true, because it felt so obvious to me, but i guess i was wrong lmao!

the ivory key by akshaya raman 📚 🌟🌟🌟

almost a four star! this one has been on my radar for a while but the secondhand listing i was eyeing got snatched up, so i picked it up from the library.

i liked the sibling dynamic a lot more than i was expecting to. i don't know if akshaya raman has siblings, but as someone with a lot of siblings the way the main four characters were written felt very authetic. they felt like a very messy family rather than just normal close friends, which is how a lot of siblings in fiction (especially ya fiction) end up reading to me.

definitely intrigued. it's not a high priority but i think i am going continue with the series eventually, especially since it's a duology and there's only one other book.

a reaper at the gates by sabaa tahir 📖 🌟🌟🌟🌟

once again i'm excited to be continuing the series!

i will say that this book, especially the second half, felt a lot more like set-up for the final book than it's own story. but it wasn't severe enough set-up that i felt bored or cheated or anything like that, it was just a bit frustrating because i knew i wasn't going to get full resolution for any of these plotlines until the fourth and final book, which i don't own yet.

i am very excited to see how the story concluces. i don't want to give too much away because i do think this series is very good and if you like young adult fantasy but you haven't read it you should, but there are certain circumstances that a certain character has found themself in and i'm VERY curious as to how they're going to get out of it in the third book because it seems kind of inescapable to me...

[rain-fluff]

Journal Five

I'm starting to wonder if the courses I'm taking this semester really is as heavy most have told me. At first I was only worried about my the more calculation/factual courses but I'm starting to wonder if the other two could start to be mentally draining as well. I'm not sure if I'm being overly ambitious with this particular assignment but at the same time I can't help but feel like I'm trying to compensate my lack of will from when I was still in art school (maybe both for all we know). Am I biting off more than I can chew or am I just overthinking it and should just accept free-reign of my creative freedom where I can?

Everytime I sit in this class I can't help but have these mixture of feelings of being too confident and lacking confidence. I'm overconfident because some stuff taught are things I know already but I can't exactly show off either because my execution hasn't always been the greatest and was a major factor why I dropped out of art school. I want to say I feel good with my work but the truth is I never actually do, even if it's something I have already set aside as a hobby today. Hopefully this particular assignment works out well enough but man I hate Adobe softwares. It took me like two hours just the get the programmes I needed but at least I've upgraded them from the outdated ones I used to use.

I definitely want to make my assignment themed after Final Fantasy VII though. I might as well make the assignment entertaining for myself right? I get to make goofy and silly sprites of Cloud Strife and Sephiroth for an event poster that is never going ever to happen. Who wouldn't like that?

Speaking of interests though, I was able to get a ticket to watch the new Spy x Family! Alone!! I had a classmate that said that it must feel nice to have a "me day" but honestly I'm a fairly lonely person and remembered being pretty desperate when I asked my friends to join me but alas conflicting schedules within adult friend groups will usually arise in these situations one way or another and it couldn't be helped. I did almost and could've gone with this one friend on a later date but for some reason I thought it would be the final screening (it wasn't, I was just an idiot who didn't know that screening lists refresh every Wednesdays) so I went ahead and bought a single premium ticket anyway.

I loved the movie a lot in spite the hiccups ! I can't decide whether I want to give it an 8 or 9.5/10 because I'm aware that I am rating it out of large bias due to my favouritism towards the pink gremlin but can you blame me when the author created such a loveable dumbass child? Anya is so silly and she feels very reminiscent of how I was as a kid being closer to the bottom of the class when it comes to grades but she still has this genuine earnestness to make her new-found family proud that it makes you want to root for her as much as you can. I think my only complaint was that there could've been more interactions between Anya and Damian but otherwise it was a very heartwarming watch and would not hesitate watching it again if I weren't so broke.

I also had a really good coffee and bagel for lunch! The jalapeno bagel with spring onion cream cheese paired with my caramel latte was so good that I appearantly had the urge to spend more money on popcorn and soda anyway for the movie. See, this is another reason why I can't go out alone because I spend my money too much when I'm by myself. (Yes I am fully aware that I am a responsible adult in my mid-twenties who overindulged please know that I'm joking because God forbid people know the difference between between seriousness and sarcasm in text form)

Hey speaking of money; I definitely may or may not have overspent my monthly financial support with a particular doll that I saw online. In my defense however, it is a very cute doll that I've been eyeing since mid January. In other news, don't be surprised if I don't write about outings after this because capitalism has me gripped by the balls and I can't escape it every month. Attached below is the doll I eagerly wait for arrival and an illustrative embodiment of what I will endure for the rest of the month. Cheers everyone!

-rain

[shadycollectivetragedy]

yeah I'm sorry fellas,

I know you put in a lot of effort and work and I want to imagine that there is value that I just can't see

but that is the case

why do you keep on dropping false references in regards to the friend I had a falling out with?

or refuse to acknowledge or take accountability for the sexting you engaged in pretending to be her aggressively encouraging my participation in and now imagine I would waste a moment entertaining criticism for the things offered in the belief I was speaking to someone else

number one it's really really sad pathetic confusing and ridiculous that a man might spend his time online pretending to be a woman and encouraging another man to masturbate to the shit he's saying I mean

let's set aside the whole bisexual or homosexual angle to that

it is still no less offensive, rather than as a costume party or some other occasion in which not disclosing your identity is to be expected

what you have done is so much further down the scale of

bizarre freak show nonsense ridiculous bullshit I don't even know what to say about it

why would you imagine I would even for a moment question the validity support or integrity of my friends and when I say my friends I mean my actual friends not people that happen to overlap my orbit.

maybe my hesitation confused you to the point where you thought you had gained some traction but it was not uncertainty but

concern for your mental health

let me explain something to you once and for all there is no one in my family there is no one in my son's family and there is no friend I have ever had

who would ever consider stealing from me for any reason

attacking me for any reason

or accusing me of anything.

in fact in the entirety of my life only Fred Martin Trretter,

the lifelong alcoholic and drug addicts and pedophile,

would

ever do anything remotely similar to what has been going on

I really don't care whatever point anybody else wanted to offer the moral support it's very thoughtful loving and kind of anybody who took the time to want to sign the card

but the fact of the matter is either through a direct mutual acquaintance or adding my name to some kind of vendetta list online

I was defrauded of almost $100,000 over the last 5 years

and more disturbing and bizarre than that, someone has been hacking into my phone with the singular intent of preventing me from viewing any adult content, and frankly I don't have the faculties to indulge the commentary regarding the justification it's all so stupid it physically hurts my head to allow the words entry .

because ultimately it's subterfuge

an indirect recrimination on

a different behavior often associated with "self love" that people just can't ever interpret any other way other than complete self destruction and surrender to hopelessness .

Which is ironic since it was your lies and the construction of a social media quarantine for lack of a better term with the included thoughtfulness of endless lies about the well-being of the people who had been part of my life

and the suggestion that people I know very well who would give me the shirt off their backs where I to ask

just woke up one day and decided they would go online and see if there was anybody who had any plans to Rob and defraud me of over $100,000 over the course of 5 years in an effort to defend me forcing me into a circumstance where I was within the reach of what is holy and entirely a criminal conspiracy no matter what you think or why you think it

I guess my issue is this

if you want to distance yourself from what had been going on

you're going to have to explain why you would actively try and defend people who did not have my best interest in mind at all.

this whole getting a job and living" right"

nonsense suddenly replacing

everyone hates you

you suck

she hates you,

you said you wanted to do dirty things with her you pig, everyone hates you

it's beyond played out and annoying

I was a store manager for a major Auto parts chain for several years before, deciding if I didn't get out of retail I never would as I had been in that field since high school.

and after some time I was able to gain a wg-10 Federal technician position working on Black hawks and then later on c-17s

which due to the nature of the positions required enlistment in the national guard or reserves which at that particular time created instability

as we were fighting two wars at the time

ultimately without many options left I turn to one of my closest friends , who was able to get me an interview within the company he worked for which wound up being an incredibly great position and opportunity

one which I was placed in a position to either protect or to maintain the standard of involvement that I felt is not negotiable for a parent.

the point is after 15 years of taking whatever I can find simply because whatever I could find afforded me more of an opportunity to be home every night instead of working overtime or salaried or deployed or training out of state,

having my responsibilities interfere with a really terrific position, in a Fortune 50 company,

I decided I wouldn't put too much time into looking for work again until my son was old enough that he didn't need me at his side.

and wouldn't you know it,

3 months before he moved full time to his mother's house for the remainder of his high school years

my loving family decides that nothing I believe to be doing

is anything more than an excuse to be lazy

and asked me to leave the home without any money saved or place to go,

so that's the first place you probably should begin the fact that I had begun preparing for moving to a new location and finding work in light of my son's own change of location

only to have those plans laid to waste by people who I should have been able to count on ,

and not only that in an effort to ensure their own liabilities were addressed,

some of them felt a need to lie to other people each other my family and the police as well as the courts

to justify what ultimately was just an act of spite and resentment

as a consequence of and that dishonesty I spent half a year in jail

and pretty much watched another 5 years of my life go up in smoke being bounced around from one transitional housing veterans subsidized program to the next

like I had 5 years to surrender to other people's opinions judgments criticisms and accusations

something that you were involved in intimately the whole time

with your hacking and curated social media footprint that never fails to produce a consensus of disagreement or criticism. as if I would be so upset it would escape my notice that it's odd that the whole world agrees to disagree with me, lol.

that just doesn't happen

so

for your benefit let's clarify a few things here

stop wasting my time pointing the finger that anybody else I know it was Fred tretter , Robert Russell. Corey Foster,

and their friend Ryan who began attacking and, violating my privacy my trust, my home,

my electronics,

all with a pre-contrive justification to end up somewhere regarding sexual impropriety at such a Time when they could not avoid taking responsibility for at least some of what had happened.

and you had no other intention motive or plan

the whole asshat cracker Jack's box ADHD therapy angle along with we want you to get right with God and we want you to stop looking at those dirty dirty pictures, and we want you to be sober, and get a job

how thoughtful

but it does suggest the question

where was all that for the first 5 years when you were just stealing from me and having people harass me?

see the idea that it was anybody that I consider a friend or a part of my life is completely laid to waste under the weight of that fact because there's nobody at all in my entire life who would ever do anything in anger or animosity towards me because I never gave them any reason to

leaving only Fred Cory Robert and Ryan

in the entire world really who would even think it

which creates a bit of a cognitive dissonance for me in that,

on one hand you have repeatedly encouraged me to take matters into my own hands regarding Mr tretter and on the other hand you have prevented me from engaging in anymore research using his online handle.

you're all over the place

and you need to get your shit straight because based on the evidence collected so far from your actions you have no interest in doing anything of a positive nature

just a hustle a con a thief and desperately trying to delineate the actions and statements of one 30 yo dancer and entrepreneur who indicated she was hired to victimize me

and everything that has happened since I first came on property three or four years ago

you can't do that you will never do that

from the group and Artesia to the young ladies who robbed me in my home to the collection of individuals engaged in process here

I really don't know what you imagine is going to happen from posting images of people here or there or anywhere really I don't have any interest in tracking anybody down for any reason I don't do that

not ever

so showing me this one or that one can be found here or there is really immaterial to a degree that makes you seem completely incompetent because you just have no clue

in the exact same way that you think there's some way you're going to compartmentalize or refrain you're not

not ever

I don't care for what or why I don't care if you thought it was appropriate or you thought you were helping or you thought it was needed

you're welcome to

but the investigation as it were has been concluded and I am not inclined to afford you the opportunity to spin more stupid stories

Fred owes me $100,000 and since I know his big move is prove it prove it prove it you can't prove it prove it you can't prove it

I'll have to collect in some other way that isn't going to be anything that makes anybody happy in any way but I'm afraid I'm going to have to insist

and the decision is final

[fwoosheye]

Ooooo I'm so glad you like it! p/ ily too <3<3<3

I have actually posted the first chapter of Four Wild Ones, though the split haven't occured yet. If my planning isn't disrupted too much (I am in the process of tweaking the mind map and outline I have based on what I've learned so far from TotK) the split should happen the next chapter :3

But if you want to make your version of this concept go for it! I'm just happy my ideas inspire others, that's why I tend to drop most of them @fwoosh-prompts in an attempt to make my brain not focus on all at once lmao ;p But I would be very happy if you could tag me though or drop a link to it in my asks so I can love it if you make your version <3 ;)

Your takes on them are really interesting! This might be spoilering so I'll put it under a readmore just in case but this is what I have planned for them as characters:

So all of them love cooking though what each of them prefer to cook might vary. Oh and in this au the part of the power from four elemental stones that was used to power the Four Sword stays with the "clone". I also might make them FtM trans for reasons listed under Purple but that would not be a major plot point if so

Chill (Blue) is pretty chill ;) He would indeed be a nightmare in TotK, though tbf that's true for all of them. His weapon of choice is the spear for it's long reach and speed, and his main rune is Cryonis. He will use the glitch where a well times Cryonis to cause enemies to launch into the air – or to launch himself from waterfalls for faster paragliding. His element is Water and because of that he's the best swimmer. He remembers his feelings for Mipha when he remembers her, and he will probably fall for Sidon too. Other than that he is the most "knightly" of them and would catch and register all the horses if he could. Loves all mushrooms and chilltrouts

Sizzle (Red) would be a different nightmare in that he has perfected using two handed blades and clubs and will brute force his way through. He will also not hesitate to use Magnesis so slam stuff into enemies when the option exist. He also have used the glitch with Magnesis to stack carts and stuff in a certain way and make himself "float" away. His element is Fire so he can go much further than the others before needing a fireproof elixir or item – and he is determined to become totally immune. Somehow. No romance planned for Sizzle but he might get a bromance with Yunobo? He is mute and the one whose first instinct is to climb stuff. He likes all fish except salmon, and spicy stuff

Duri (Green) favour bows and is by far the best of them with those. He will use Stasis launch himself to places, to slam stuff into enemies, or to freeze enemies with a too good defense. Because his element is Air, he got better control of the paraglider and will glide everywhere when possible. He got the fuzzy feels for Zelda and is really confused in the beginning as to why when the first memories of her he recalls are the ones where she's nasty to him. He likes all things with fruits or fowl meat

Swift (Purple) prefer to use one handed weapons and shields. He's the master of the parry in the group. His main Rune is the Bombs and he will bomb launch himself exactly once before the others forbid him from ever doing it again. His element is Earth and he feels really self conscious about it because he can't use it like the others can use theirs and both Nabooris and Urbosa have Lightning powers – at least until Shadow points out that the Earth element makes him more immune to electricity. He adores Sand Seals and would ride them everywhere if he could. He have bff bonding moments with Riju over them. I'm probably gonna make him gender fluid partly because I want to practice writing various gender identities other than cis, and also because the idea of Shadow having an internal panic when realizing that they don't remember anything about the birds and the bees and it's something they should know, is somewhat amusing to me. And it would be a good practice to write that following conversation. Anyway Swift probably won't get any romance either (maybe at most remembering a past small secret crush on Urbosa that he's embarrassed about because of the age difference and it's the kind of crush small kids might have on their teacher). Anyway Swift loves cooking with veggies and herbs

Shadow (alt name secret for now as it's not food-based) will usually hang back during fights for to be revealed reasons, but when he do he is most likely to use magic. Have a Rune only he can use – the Amiibo Rune and the au excuse is that the word means roughly "summon a divine gift". Ridiculously long recharge time though. Kinda snarky sometimes and won't openly admit that he's good (a bit like Crowley in Good Omens) but will give advice and help in his own way when possible. No romance because he don't want one. He had never learned to cook before so his default is to roast some meat with maybe some salt or herbs. But he is learning, and his favorite to eat is a slow cooked meat stew with carrots and beets

Fic idea where BotW-Link finds the Four Sword in the Forgotten Temple and draws it and consequensely split into four people.

So I got the idea for this after stumbling across a youtube clip last night of some guys playing a modded botw so it's a multiplayer, and I chatted a bit in a discord about it and wasn't really planning on doing anything with it since I already have several unreleased wip:s but....

Should I do it? 👀