#this is NOT mental health advice i am NOT a medical professional

[idolsummons]

'Mental illness isn't about getting professional help, it's about knowing how your stupid dumb brain works and tricking it into doing the right thing so you don't have to get professional help.'

[bellamygate]

idk if anyone has had the balls to say it yet and im def not the one to put it eloquently as it deserves but im seeing some uneasy & alarming trends surfacing in the manifestation & self-help community that look like cult indoctrination

[libraford]

Here's what's going on in Ohio right now. Heavy stuff ahead.

First, I want to apologize for the misinformation in my original post. I am still learning about legislative processes. To correct: the changes to ODH and OMHAS in regards to gender therapy are not a bill, they are changes in regulations.

This is important because citizens CAN affect rule changes. There is an open commentary period where your submissions get counted and can affect how they write new regulations.

Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer, legal advocate, or medical professional. I'm just a dude who had to have it all explained to me.

The first one is Ohio Mental Health and Addiction Services. The rules proposed would make the already prohibitive process of gender transition even harder. In order to diagnose and treat gender dysphoria, a hospital needs to have a board certified psychologist per patient, a board certified endocrinologist familiar with the age group being diagnosed per patient, and a medical ethicist overseeing the hospital's plan for transition. 'Board certified' does not guarantee that the specialist is trans-friendly. It must include a detransition plan. Hospitals would have to report compliance annually. The professionals must have a contractual relationship with the patient, but do not need to offer in-person care. (In this instance, I'll get to that in the next rule change.)

This rule also deems it impermissible to prescribe gender transition care (this includes hormones, puberty blockers, or drugs) for anyone under the age of 21 without the approval of the professionals mentioned and 6 months of therapy.

There is an exception for intersex people, who may have their sex assigned to them without their consent.

The open comment period for this ends January 19 at 5pm.

Send an email to MH-SOT-rules@mha.ohio.gov with the subject title: "Comments on Gender Transition Care Rules."

The second one is Ohio Department of Health and it repeats a lot of the same as the first one. However, the focus is more on the regulation of doctors and paperwork. Anyone seeking transition will be put into a registry with their name redacted, but demographics like age, agab, specific diagnosis (difficult to achieve with the new regulations mentioned above), and any medications (not just related to gender transition, but any medications at all). Any cessation of care must be reported within 30 days.

This is a lot of paperwork and can overburden hospitals.

That 30 days cessation is important because if a person transfers doctors or if a clinic closes and the paperwork isn't filed, it may count as a 'detransition' when tallying demographics, even if that is not the case.

But what's curious is that the ODH regulations DO require in-person care. The rules are contradictory and vague.

The comment period for this ends Feb 5th.

Send a comment through the ODH website

Here are some important things that were mentioned at the meeting:

This is a good time to be personal with your statements. If this would disrupt your life in any way, please say so. "I fear that" "I believe this" "I worry that"- these are great ways to start your comment. An example one person gave is "I worry that this change in regulations would force me and my daughter to move out of state.'

With that being said, anything that you send to these sites will be public record, so be cautious about what you reveal about yourself in your comment.

If you are in need of help, please reach out to one of these resources:

Trans Ohio Emergency Fund Resource Page

Kaleidoscope Youth Center

If you are in need of legal advice on how to navigate all this, please call

888-LGBT-LAW

This is not everything. There is unfortunately more because Ohio decided to break a record this month with anti-trans motions. But today I'm focusing on things that we can take action on.

[nonegenderleftpain]

Something else to know, anon, is that you absolutely have the right to -and absolutely*should* - let your therapist know if what they're doing isn't helpful to you. Most therapists are trained in more than one kind of therapy, and if they aren't able to adjust to a different style, most are happy to help you find someone who can (and if they AREN'T happy to do so, you need to leave them anyway, because they are not concerned about your health).

When I started therapy when I was 14, the therapy I was doing then was drastically different than the therapy I'm doing a decade later. At the time, I needed general counseling and an adult to affirm that what was happening to me was real. Then, I needed intensive bipolar treatment, hand in hand with a behavioral psychologist that could help me break down *why* my brain was doing what it was doing, because general counseling was not helping me. Now, I am back to general counseling because I no longer need that intensive care except in crisis situations. It did what I needed it to do, and when they couldn't help me any further, I stepped away into just maintaining my health.

Because of a recent crisis, I need to find a sexual health therapist. My general therapist is helping look among her colleagues to find someone she thinks will connect with me based on the kind of care she knows I need. That is a sign of a good therapist, and one that cares about me holistically, not just as a paying customer. And because my therapist is fantastic at doing what *I* need - general affirmation, grounding, and the occasional reminder of already-present coping mechanisms I learned in more intensive therapy in the past - I intend to stick with her for as long as I can.

Something a lot of people going to therapy for the first time don't realize is that, like every doctor, you should absolutely get a second opinion or find a new provider entirely in order to fit your needs. You are *paying* them. They are beholden to you, and if they are not listening or not actually improved your quality of life, you are wasting your time and money being there. Unless you live in bumfuck nowhere like I did growing up and only have one option, you should try people out and ask for changes in the type of therapy they're providing. Ask them questions about their practice. Tell them what you think would help you best (do you need someone to be kind and gentle? do you need someone to kick your ass in shape and call you out on your bullshit? do you need someone to help you restructure how you think and sort through your feelings?) and if they don't think they can provide it, thank them for their time and ask for a reference to someone who can. You owe it to yourself.

i just started therapy and it's really not what i expected it to be. like i just talk for an hour while the lady nods and occasionally affirms me?

The thing about therapy is that there's a lot of different types, and every therapist uses them in a different way, so whether or not you benefit from therapy really hinges on whether you're a good match with that particular therapist. Might be that her method isn't something that'd work for you, and I think you should bring this up the next time.

That's the frustrating part with therapy, having a good dynamic with a therapist is just as important as them being a qualified professional. Mental health treatment isn't one-size-fits-all and what works for you might even change in time.

I switched therapists when I stopped making progress with my first one - she was focused on practical problem-solving and helped me stop acting unhinged, but after I got to that point, we didn't get any further. My current therapist has a different work method and is more focused on delving into thoughts and feelings, figuring out why I was acting that way in the first place.

[healthylifeenjoy]

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[inkskinned]

im having a particularly terrible night with urges and imagery that i dont know how to handle. i gave in to some things. held back on some others. but im barely holding on, dear internet stranger.

you do not owe me your time or your words.. but if you could write some hope into existence for me.. i would be unendingly grateful to you.

please. tell me how you do it. tell me how you survive. because im not so sure i can get through the fifteen days it'll take to get to my seventeenth birthday.

could you please give me something to place my faith in? i dont think the universe is watching out for me anymore.

i don't usually answer these, because i am not a professional, and you deserve professional help. when i was 17 i was terrified of the idea of professional help, because my household was extremely unsafe, and made it clear that if i ever chose to get help, i would be punished for it.

i hope this is not your case. i hope that you can call someone, and they can take you where you should go.

but i will give you the advice that i wish i got, when i couldn't get help at 17, when i was so bad that years later, i literally don't-know-how-i-survived it: what you want is peace, not death. your brain is sick. it has romanticized an ending where there are no consequences. where effort isn't necessary. where you can just... forget.

you want peace. that is a normal, human thing to want. maybe it feels more like you want quiet. or just... to take a break for a second.

here is what i will say: to end yourself means you never get to experience what it's like to actually be happy. i thought i knew what it was like, and i was bitter about it. i'd say - i've been happy, it's not worth it, because i didn't know what i was missing. i thought that happiness meant having a partner or having a job or money or a college degree. it sounded like effort. it sounded like something that had to happen to me.

for the first time in my life, just this week, i was able to go to a concert and just-enjoy-it. no liquor, no drugs. just stomping my feet and getting caught up in it. i didn't feel nervous or self-conscious or overwhelmed. i just had a good time. these days have a lot of these firsts for me - it is the first time i can eat cake without crying. it is the first time i can be around an exacto blade without supervision. it is the first time i have too many people to call when i am crying.

i can't tell you where you'll run into happiness, only that, for me, it started once i was out of that fucking house. it started once i figured out where the pain was coming from. once i figured out that i was not possessed, something medical was wrong with me. that i am not stupid or lazy, i have depression and adhd. the first few years were difficult. at 19, during my efforts to recover, i actually got worse by a considerable margin. and then, with time and patience - i got better.

happiness doesn't feel like what you think it will. in movies it's so golden and all-encompassing. but it doesn't fly into your hands when you buy your first car nor does it arrive in the arms of a partner nor does it require passing your classes. happiness came to me on a tuesday in the form of a red-winged blackbird, and i looked at her, and she looked at me, and i said - oh. the whole world suddenly filled itself in with color. like i had been forever-asleep. like every corner of every room was suddenly glistening.

it ended quickly, back then. it just stopped in to check in on me. but it was enough - this thing i had never experienced, but that i knew (logically) could happen. before that, i was only staying because it would make my mom sad if i died. that was my only reason. and then the happiness came, so strange and brilliant and lovely that for years i couldn't even look at it directly.

these days, things are so different. life is so much easier. i don't wish for death because so much of what i have is already at peace. my boss understands when i need a mental health day. people in general are less prone to high school drama. entire communities hold my hand and have my number. i have a car and a dog and a little apartment garden and candles on all available surfaces and today i bought myself a little cake just-to-celebrate-nothing. my body is my own and we are both dancing.

there are so many things i've gotten to taste in the last 10 years. i know, for you, that is an eon, because it's more than half of your life. but if it helps? in the 5 years between 17-21: i filled myself with laughter and love. i got to be a lead in a ballet and got my first tattoo and then my second and pierced my ears the way i'd wanted to (one of them professionally the other over a hot stove with a potato) and i discovered hozier is my favorite singer (i know. he was new back then) and i got my first real job and my first real paycheck and i hadn't ever been seen as smart but then i started to actually treat my adhd as a condition rather than a burden and people started saying you're like the smartest person in the room and my best friend met her husband who i will one day stand next to as maid of honor when he is her groom and i got to help people and make a stupid blog called "inkskinned" and find out that writing is actually my passion and that maybe i'm actually kind of good at it if i just practice and i got to meet my parents' dog (his name is kaiju) and i slept on couches and kissed people and tried new things and learned how to breathe without feeling my chest tighten and that peace is here, on this planet, that peace echoes everywhere, it is in my hair and my homework and my houseplants, it is quiet and divine and mine because i fought for it and i built it and yes i lost hair over it but holy shit the whole world feels like it is shifted through a sunbeam

recently someone asked me if i could go back in time to 6th grade, with all the knowledge i have now, would i? and without thinking, i barked absolutely not. i know i should say it's because i wouldn't want to risk losing any of this stuff - but really it's because i would never survive being a teenager again. it sounds incredibly lame and impossible, fake - but being a teenager was the hardest thing i ever did. i had no voice, no control, only fear and hatred.

but i did survive it. nothing about me is special. nothing about me is stronger than you or better prepared or more efficient. i didn't survive it perfectly. i made a lot of mistakes and lost a lot of friends and harmed myself in ways that i'm still recovering from. but i did survive it. and there is a part of me looking at you in the past and saying - i'm you in the future.

and holy shit. every day. every goddamn day i'm glad we survived to see the rest of it. because you hit 18 and everything changes. like, everything. and holy shit, it is infinitely worth it.

[nocturniashifter]

𝓦hat is your friendships like in your dr? | pick a pile

Hello, my angels! After a long time without posting any PAP, here I am. I really hope you like it and that it resonates with you ;) ♡

┈─★ Disclaimer: This reading is for entertainment purposes only and shouldn't be taken seriously or used as a substitute for medical and professional advice. It's also a general reading, so it may or may not resonate with you.

┈─★ How to choose: Close your eyes, take a deep breath and choose the image that catches your attention the most – trust your intuition.

MASTERLIST | PAID READINGS

── .✦ PILE 1

Shufflemancy: Hippies - flipturn, Picture Frames - rei brown, Knight - Maddox, I Love You But I Need Another Year - Liza Anne, Persephone - The Tragic Thrills.

It's funny because from the first moment you started your friendship, you and your friends are “the weird ones” together – you might have a more alternative style or you just don't fit into the boxes that society tries to put you in/don't follow the expectations that society imposes on you.

In your friendship, you accept and love each other exactly as you are and since there is no judgement, you can let your weirder sides out because there is this safe space in your relationship lol. But although you may be judged as “the weird one” by other people or even by yourself jokingly, your friendship is very beautiful!

You really are there for each other whenever one of you needs. If one of you is going through dark periods in life, the other will not abandon you in those difficult times and will reach out to help as much as they can – you are like each other's knights in armor. I say this not only metaphorically, but for those who are shifting into a DR that involves a lot of action and is more dangerous, your friends will really be there to protect you because they want to keep you safe. They would even risk their lives for you if necessary – and they wouldn't do that for just anyone but you. It's so cute, you are always in their hearts 😔💗

You and your friends really love each other. But, one of you is facing mental health problems – you may not even have a diagnosis yet because this person is avoiding therapy, if it's you go now or I'll pull your foot when you're sleeping 🤨 – and you don't want to become a burden to the other person in friendship.

Because of this, this person who is facing this problem may end up distancing themselves from other people because they don't want to drag them into this situation even if all they want is for someone to be present in their life supporting them during this difficult time. Be there for that person just like they were there for you when the world was falling apart.

Demonstrate through words and actions that you care about that person's well-being and encourage them to seek profissional help because it will be beneficial for them - and if you are the one going through this, be there for yourself, take care of yourself and, above all, seek professional help. Know that, regardless of what happens, your friends love you very much and will always be here for you – when the world is falling apart or when everything is fine.

── .✦ PILE 2

Shufflemancy: Five Foot Tree - Flannel Graph, She Sings in the Morning - Pierce The Veil, The Fall - half•alive, What the Heck - Tried to run away, Ultimately - khai dreams.

Your friendship is so beautiful, pile 2! Your friends love you so much that if they could, they would take away all the suffering you have and leave you with only the best that life has to offer.

Your friends may think that they don't have many material things to offer you, but they give themselves completely to you and hope that that is enough.

In your friendship, your friends are not the type of people who tell you what you want to hear – no, on the contrary, they tell you what you need and often give you reality checks or make you wake up/open your eyes for a certain situation that you weren't seeing things right or lying to yourself, but they do it for your good.

Due to negative experiences in previous relationships – whether platonic or romantic – you or your friends have developed trust issues and therefore do not feel safe opening their hearts and being vulnerable with other people for fear of being stabbed in the back like It's happened other times. But, it seems that little by little you or your friends are learning to open your hearts, to share your thoughts and ideas and to trust each other despite the fears and insecurities you feel and that is very good.

You're the kind of friends who can talk about literally any topic or sometimes just make small talk – one moment you can be talking about the silliest, most idiotic things, making jokes, and the next moment you're having deep conversations about serious and important topics.

You and your friends are learning and growing together over time and through your experiences. You love and accept each other exactly as you are – including all your flaws. When you make a mistake, you admit it and always do your best to keep your friendship working. You support each other, care for each other, respect each other and generally bring out the best versions of each other. This is very beautiful, pile 2!

── .✦ PILE 3

Shufflemancy: Corpses - Saint Sisters, Cocoa Hooves - Glass Animal, To Love Someone Else - Avery Lynch, Tesselation - Mild High Club, new skin - VÉRITE.

You and your friends have more than just a friendship. Your friendship goes far beyond that: you are each other's family and you are truly there for each other in the worst and best moments you face in your lives.

Your friendship is so strong that you will spend your entire life by each other's side and will remain friends until old age. You've been through a lot together and will continue to be by each other's side whenever one of you needs it, until death.

Just like in pile 2, you or your friends have difficulty opening up due to negative experiences in previous relationships – be it trust issues, fear of judgement, fear of rejection or their own insecurities – and may end up trying hide parts of yourself. But all this effort to try to hide who you really are is in vain, because your friends can clearly see through you.

As I mentioned earlier, your bond is so strong that your friendship will last until old age and your friends know you better than you know yourself, so there is no need to try to be someone you are not because they love you exactly as you are. It is. Your friends really love you and you make them feel great, so stop thinking you're not enough.

For some of you reading this pile, one of these friends is your s/o and they really love you but they need to keep it a secret because they don't know if you reciprocate their romantic feelings and they're afraid of rejection or ruining their friendship with you.

Although you and your friends have many things in common, you are still completely different people who share world views that are not the same as the other person – and in your friendship this is not a problem, on the contrary, you end up learning a lot with the other person, gaining new perspectives and experiences. You take yourself out of your comfort zone and, thanks to you, your friends feel like they are different people than they were before and even better.

That was all, everyone! I hope y'all liked it. Until the next PAP! ♡

© nocturniashifter – don't copy, redistribute or edit my content | dividers

[macgyvermedical]

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[cripplecharacters]

Context:

I know the first question on your QNA says your general answer is “if you are talking about your own disability, you can talk about it however you please”, so for clarity: I am mentally disabled. I am not physically disabled. My story features characters with a range of different disabilities, many of which I do not have.

The story in question is a satire on the mental health industry and my personal experiences with ableism (especially about ableist societal pressures about needing to be “fixed”).

It follows the daily life of many characters who underwent a fictitious sci-fi “cure-all” treatment which was pushed onto mentally ill people who were considered “lost causes”. The “cure” is inherently flawed on a conceptual level, but also just doesn't work.

Here's what I'm worried about:

A lot of the featured characters wind up with disabling side effects from the “cure” (for example, two characters end up with acquired neurological disorders), or exacerbations of symptoms they had previously (some through adverse reactions physiologically to the "cure", some through the emotional trauma of the experience, etc).

I don’t want it to seem like the takeaway should be “eugenics is only bad because it makes people more disabled”, and I'm worried that might be an accidental implication here.

Do you have any advice on preventing that implication?

This isn't the whole plot, but I don't know how relevant the rest is the mention.

Hello,

Okay, so this is a matter of consent and the violation of it. Focus on that. That's an absolutely massive violation of bodily autonomy with no concern for the patient. In fact, this violates the Hippocratic Oath, which is the number one rule of science and medicine, to do no harm, but it's okay to just disregard that when the patient is disabled. That's what's messed up about this. Their bodily autonomy was violated and their bodies and minds were permanently modified without their consent in a way that caused major undue harm, and the government and doctors associations (or whoever can take away a license to practice) are okay with this because the victims of this crime are disabled people.

Focus on it that way. It's not about the resulting disability, it's about the fact that these people had their right to their bodies taken away from them because they're disabled, and they were denied basic human rights and humane medical treatment on the same basis. The resulting disability isn't really the problem, it's the fact that undue harm was done to them by medical professionals that's the problem.

You have a basic human rights issue, something that is violating the international agreement on basic human rights. That's the huge deal.

Mod Aaron

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Disclaimer: This guided meditation is intended for entertainment purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Please consult with a qualified healthcare provider or mental health professional before listening to this meditation, especially if you have any medical or psychological conditions. Your health and well-being are important, and professional guidance is always recommended.

[schizopositivity]

Do you have a severe mental illness that can/has caused a mental health emergency? Are you currently stable? You should make a basic safety plan! [Disclaimer: I am not a mental health professional, this advice is taken from my own experiences and what I learned in inpatient psychiatric facilities. This post caters more to those who experience severe psychotic episodes as that is my experience.]

1. Find a safe person. Someone you often spend time with that you can trust with the details of your mental illness and feel safe around. Ask them if they are comfortable being the person to look out for you if you have a mental health emergency. Preferably someone you live with. If no one you live with fits this role, find someone you contact regularly.

2. Explain to the safe person what a mental health emergency looks like for you. Think of the way you presented in the past during mental health emergencies and try to describe it. You may have to describe it based on what others have told you if you had memory loss during episodes in the past.

3. Let them know how they can check with you to see if you are in a mental crisis. You might need them to ask you some questions to gage your mental state (examplse: Do you know where you are right now? Are you able to talk?). Tell them what questions to ask to find out if you are in a crisis.

4. Explain to them what you would want to happen in a mental health emergency. If they are able to see that you are indeed in a mental health emergency, what steps would you want them to take? If you will need to go to the hospital, but don't want to interact with police, let them know to tell that to emergency services. If there's a nearby inpatient facility you would want to go to, tell them which one and give them their contact info. If episodes typically pass on their own for you, let the safe person know how to keep you comfortable and safe until it passes.

5. Have an easily accessible contact paper or note on your phone with some basic info in case you can't speak to professional help while you are in a crisis. Add your name, birth date, your diagnoses, and exactly what medications you take and the dosages. You can add specific warnings or triggers about yourself (examples: Doesn't like being touched by medical professionals. Can react violently to loud noises). You can add contact info of people you'd want to let know about your situation. You can add your insurance information if you have it.

6. If you would have to go to a hospital/inpatient facility, let the safe person know if there's anything else you'd want them to handle once you get there. (Examples: Pack a bag of clothes for the inpatient stay. Feed my pets while I'm gone or ask someone else to. Contact my work place for me and let them know I won't be able to come in.)

Yes this is a long list, but I feel it's important to prepare and get your bases covered while you have the capacity to do so. Often when someone is in crisis they don't know how to ask for help, or what to do once they get help. Thinking of everything ahead of time saves you the extra worry later, or the extra worry of guessing by the people around you.

And if you are thinking "this is too much work to make someone else do!" Consider how much harder it would be if they found you in crisis and had no idea what to do and you wouldn't be able to tell them. If you have a severe mental illness that can/has caused you to be in a state of mental health emergency, you deserve to be cared for by others during the crisis.

[unstablenoodle]

Just graduated, and I’ve been dragging myself by my hair through the last 4 years. here’s advice if you’re new to college:

Basic advice:

Make friends in your lectures. You will know some of those people all four years, and some of them are better at this than you. You’re still capable, but there’s always a bigger fish and you should make that fish into a study buddy

Get a job at a food court/ campus restaurant. You get a free meal, which might be your only one for the day if you don’t have a meal plan. Work can also be a mental break from academics.

Abuse office hours. Annoy your TA. make them scared to see you. TA’s are tired grad students and you won’t have a formal relationship with them: they are students too.

Study advice:

Flash cards are for review and rote learning only. 15-30 minute power review sessions for things you already know. If you’re going over familiar shit, do it in short, repetitive bursts.

Be the bitch with annoying decorative notes. Make it a game, it’ll force you to look at the material more. I will say though, make sure you decorate with purpose.

Those friends you made in lecture? That’s where you get the big studying done. If you’re going for a higher 4 hour long study sesh, bring other people. They know things you don’t and vice versa, so you can fill in the gaps for each other. This type of studying is for unfamiliar or confusing material.

Big study sessions usually only happen a couple weeks out from exams at most. Before exams, your homework is your main means of studying.

Just go to the lecture. I don’t care if it’s at 7:30 am, go. Participation points could be the difference between a B and a C.

TI-84 graphing calculator

Pub chem

If a professor, for some ungodly reason, says you aren’t allowed to work on the homework with other people, fuck that guy.

Your $168.99 textbook is likely a free PDF online.

Date someone who fills in your gaps. I dated an engineer I met in a physics class and it worked beautifully.

Mental health (my advice on this is very specific):

Basic advice: drink water regularly, eat vegetables, exercise. You know all this.

Stay far, far away from any substance called a “study buddy” or something like that

Get a hobby. Actually. Something to do in your free time to keep you from going insane. I personally like knitting and drawing, but it can be anything. I’d say avoid something involving technology because it’s easy to fall into that for hours at a time. Do something that engages your hands and your brain. You might not be creative, but creativity is good for you. Your painting looks like shit? The benefits you have reaped from its creation are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Good job.

If you are having any kind of hallucination (visual, auditory, presence, etc.), seek professional help immediately. I have lived half my life with the feeling of eyes on me and the presence of people who aren’t actually there and never tried to fix it because I could “work around it.” Just go get help. Hallucinations can also be a symptom of neurological issues and physical illness.

OCD and disorders involving psychosis are aggravated by stress. Your classes will stress you out. Disorders like this are scary and debilitating, so you absolutely need to be in therapy, possibly on medication. They also tend to be episodic, so you may have periods of recovery where your life quality improves. Do NOT be fooled: you still need to be in therapy even if you feel good. Preventative measures are the best measures!!

Social:

Get a job. Work friends are funnier and way more entertaining than any other kind of friend

I recommend a group of 2-4 people you chill with regularly. Movie night with them once a week (barring exam weeks and extenuating circumstances)

Talk with your roommates at least occasionally. It’s no fun living with total strangers.

Do not start smoking cigarettes. A lot of people are repulsed by the smell and it clings to you.

Hygiene. Mainly you should smell good. You don’t have to go crazy with an expensive perfume/ cologne, but shower and always have a decent scent. Also try not to wear stained clothes.

Not sure how useful this is, but it’s the first thing I could think of. I’ll come back and edit if I think of more.

[good-advice-ganondorf]

Blog Info

Good Advice Ganondorf is a blog dedicated to giving good advice as Ganondorf in a "he would not fucking say that" way. Posts will typically be short and surface level.

I respond to Ganon/Ganondorf but this is not a kin/irl/roleplay blog. Please do not try to roleplay with me

I have autism and schizophrenia so there may be points where I misunderstand a submission or my wording doesn't make sense. Occasionally I will have to take a break because of an episode. Apologies in advance

Regarding Submissions

If my inbox is closed that means submissions are closed. Typically I close it when there are a lot of unanswered asks.

I try to answer as many asks as I can but there are some cases where I won't answer them. Cases where I won't respond include

I don't know how to

I've already answered something similar

It's too serious or personal.

I don't answer compliments, but I do read them and I'm very grateful I'm able to make people happy.

Please remember that I am not a mental health professional. I am not the person to reach out to regarding topics such as abuse, addiction, suicidal thoughts, or anything similar. I cannot give medical advice.

Time sensitive asks are not recommended since it could take me a while to get to them.

[prince-of-petrichor]

i've experienced this same type of thing with other conditions of mine, but for some reason this one hurt a lot. and i wanted to share for anyone else that is going through the same thing.

lately i've been trying to work on coping with OCD symptoms that have been becoming more debilitating due to some current life stressors, and i've actually been managing really well. but, when you have multiple illnesses (mental or physical), and you put a lot of focus on one of them, symptoms of something else can start to crop up.

and so i noticed that my AvPD was starting to get worse. im isolating, and feeling like everything i do will be seen as stupid, selfish, or attention seeking. but i've found that opposite action helps the most in these situations, and that in truth i probably do actually need some attention right now, as i haven't been socializing very much. which yes, even us with SzPD/AvPD, are social creatures who need some level of human interaction.

and so i took to the trusty internet for advice on healthy ways to ask for attention. but sadly, whether i focused the search to AvPD or to just avoidant/shy behavior in general, i couldn't manage to find any tips or resources for those of us that *are* avoidant, only for how to deal with us.

so here are a few tips for anyone else that's struggling with avoidant behavior/AvPD*:

Take deep breaths before asking for help/attention (this helps activate our parasympathetic nervous system so we can feel safer while we do this)

Tell the people that you trust exactly what's going on and how they can help (for example, today I went to my mom and said "I am really struggling today with wanting to isolate because I don't feel like anything I do is right. I am feeling really irritable because of this, please spend some time with me today, but understand that I may be short/grumpy to start." this type of dialogue can be really difficult when you have alexithmyia, but i promise with practice it gets easier)

Take a break from social media (when you're already struggling with poor self image, it's really hard to not make twisted comparisons to those we see online, give yourself some time away from screens to recenter and remind yourself of your value)

Opposite action (I mentioned this earlier but it can look like many different things. For example: doing things you know will be beneficial to your mental health despite feelings of anhedonia like playing video games/making art, asking for help despite the anxiety that tells you not too, or spending time with friends despite wanting to isolate more)

*note that these tips come from my personal lived experience, and I am not a medical professional.

[cookiesupplier]

Every Rose Has Its Thorns - Part Twenty-Six

pairing: Ricky Olson x ofc x Chris 'Motionless' Cerulli

warnings/tropes: slow burn, soulmates, strangers to enemies to lovers, betrayal, angst, fluff, smut, language, panic attack, stalking, online bullying, mental health issues.

summary: In a world where soulmates inexplicably receive a tattoo that will match that of their soulmate the moment they turn eighteen years old, being famous and covered in very visible tattoos can make finding your true soulmate a questionable fate. For everyone involved.

❗❗ author’s note: This chapter includes serious mental health situations in the past of a character, involving being unwillingly committed into a mental facility. Please beware of this potential trigger. Also, I am in no way a medical professional.❗❗

tags: @tearfallpixie @cncohshit @jordynyingling0219 @faceless-mirror @nyxthedestroyerofworlds @wild-child-7747 @witchyweeb34 @black-damask1999 @jilliemiw86 @ilovesamkiszka @lyschko666 @lacktoesandtoddlerants @bngurngheart @collapsedglasshouses @laurpartyprogram @sunsshinesunny @malerieee

Tag List is Open, please let me know if you would like to be added to it or in general.

Thank You.

She was thanking him, what, Rick as happy as he was that she wasn’t mad at him, she was thanking him, again, for something he didn’t think he deserved. It pained him that she thought she had to thank him for this, thank him for trying to look out for her. Especially when, a moment ago, he thought she was going to destroy him for invading her privacy.

“Sweetheart, you don’t-”

But before he could tell her, again, like this morning, that she didn't have to thank her for treating her with human decency, something he should have done from the start. Chris was reaching for his shoulder to stop him, fingers gripping him with a light squeeze to get his attention and cutting him off.

"It's okay, JellyBean, it's okay.. We're here for you."

When Ricky looked up over her shoulder at him confused, Chris just shook his head, and that gesture just made the feeling even worse. He didn’t get it, what wasn’t he understanding here, was he so out of the loop that he was just missing something entirely? Chris seemed to take pity on him after a moment, especially when it didn’t seem like Talia wanted to let him go yet, wanting to give her a moment to just breath..

Grabbing his phone, quickly working his fingers over the keys, typing out a message, and Rick picked up his phone to silence his messages before it came through and alerted her, assuming that was why Chris sent the message instead of just talking. His phone vibrating when the notifications started coming through, he glanced down to the screen.

Chris: she’s been fucked over by almost everyone in her life Chris: realised she can trust you to have her back with this at least Chris: just let it happen

Looking up from his phone at Chris, letting his face go completely slack for a second, he had got to be kidding him, just let it happen? Really, that was his advice right now, how was that supposed to be helping him, at all? Chris, however, was just smirking, his face all kinds of amused at the pure look of nothing but incredulity on Ricky’s face.. And Ricky just glared at him for it before he felt his phone vibrate in his hand, Chris had sent more..

Chris: don’t be stubborn Chris: trust me

This time he just rolled his eyes, he’d fucked her over in so many other ways though.. And yet, this one thing, just this, the thought of hurting her like this, made him feel fucking sick. Another glance at Chris.. Trust him.. Shit.. he had been right before.. Dammit, okay. Setting his phone back down, his hand moving back to rub down her back.

“We’re here for you, Sweetheart, no matter what.”

So they found himself holding her much like they had been this morning, sitting on the couch. Talia between them, not wanting to let go of Rick, but seeming to enjoy the comfort of Chris because when he’d gone to sit back from her, she’d made a strangled noise into Ricky’s shoulder prompting the other man to glance back at his friend and Chris to move closer to the pair again.

Still, she was far calmer than she had been this morning and so it took a far smoother time than it had then.. And Chris was grateful. Not because of how long it took, but because he never wanted to see her in so much pain like that again. It was soul-destroying to see anyone in that much pain, let alone someone he cared about, and Chris cared about Talia, so much. She had a delightful spirit, and even if she wasn’t Ricky’s soulmate, she was still Ava’s best friend, her sister, and the beauty in her heart, it was just… he swallowed, glancing at Rick over her shoulder. Smiling to him slightly as Talia sat up straighter now. 

She shifted so she was no longer facing Ricky with her back to Chris, glancing to each of them on at a time,

“Maybe we should sit up at the table now, make this conversation easier to have, while we can look at each other more clearly?”

Chris raised his eyebrow, funny that she said it like that, considering while she was talking Talia was dead set on not looking at either of them, just staring down at her hands in front of her, twisting her fingers, avoiding both of them entirely. 

“If that’s what you want, JellyBean.”

He glanced to Ricky, and sure enough, the other nodded, seeming to agree with him. Whether her reasoning was valid, considering she was the one that appeared to be the most uncomfortable right now, if she wanted to move from the couch, then they moved from the couch. Sure enough, soon they were relocated sitting up at the dining table, so they could all see each other easily, just like Talia had suggested, even if her eyes were still a little downcast towards her hands, but it was a start.

Talia took a deep breath, twisting her fingers in front of her, going over in her head what she needed to tell them, but needing to figure out how..

“I’m sorry I freaked out on you Ricky, don’t stop me, I know your opinion on my apologies. Just listen okay.”

Looking across the table at him, he was the one that had the most trouble with her apologising, she knew Chris told her she didn’t have to, but scolding her, and making her tell him off, he’d never gone that far!

“This is going to be hard enough for me to get out, so I need you to just listen, please?”

She took in a shuddering breath when he seemed to nod in agreement, and she smiled, nodding back, grateful that he was willing to accept that she wanted to do this her way this time.

“When I told Ava, Kyle and Jordan that my father tried to commit me, for a short time.. For a short time, he succeeded. Well, six months.”

“Six Months?!”

It wasn’t Ricky who burst out in surprise, and Talia glanced over at Chris who had been the one to speak up right then, only to see Ricky reach out to press a hand to his arm, seemingly as a means of comfort.

“How did Ava and the others not notice anything? I’m sorry, if my best friend disappeared for six months, I’d damn well notice.”

Talia smiled softly, he was so passionate about protecting those he loved and seeing Ricky press his hand tighter against his arm, holding onto him, showing how much he cared for Chris there, she nodded a bit to herself. He might seem so very difficult to deal with, but it was obvious that he had a softer side in there, somewhere.

“Um, well, we were in college, and my family took ski trips to Europe every year. I always hated it, its lavish, and pointless because I couldn’t bring any of my friends, family only and all of that. Usually its only about two months, but that year, instead of leaving for Europe, my parents intervened on my part of the trip.. And as far as my friends were aware, I was off having a wonderful love affair with the gorgeous sights and beauty that is Europe..”

Swallowing, she took in a deep breath,

“And you never thought to correct them.”

When she looked towards Ricky at his question.. She paused, words caught in her thought..

“It took me six months to get out of the facility, six months of being convinced I wasn’t your soulmate.. Six months of therapy and conditioning in how to live a more open and free life.. It was so painful, because the worst part was that, you see, there comes a point.. Where you start to believe it. You start to wonder, would you really be in there with all these people, these people with delusions, if you don’t have delusions either? Would a sane person really be stuck in there?”

Shuddering, she just shook her head for a moment, needing a second to just soothe herself,

“Once I was out, and I moved into Ava’s apartment before my parents could stop me, Ava was too excited to see me to ask why.. Sometimes I wonder if maybe she at least suspects the truth, or something like it, but I don’t dare say it out loud for fear of triggering something, like... like yesterday.”

Her eyes shifted back down to her hands, considering how Ava had pushed for dinner, but then backed off, she wasn’t sure either way anymore whether she thought Ava knew or not.. Maybe she didn’t, maybe thinking she knew was more wishful thinking in the hopes someone, anyone had noticed something had changed her. Of course, there were some people that knew, but the problem was the three friends who knew her well enough, had been excised from her life during the process, and fed so many lies, the web her family had woven, and Talia so easily continued rather than think about the pain after the fact.

“So when you, Ricky started talking about finding out about what was going on about the tattoo, I flashed back, I had been considering talking to my father about the people in the facility thinking the sensations were connected to my claimed delusions and for a moment, I thought I should tell you about talking to them. The moment I thought that I started spiralling, and after that, I just kept slipping further and further the more I tried to come back from the initial kick in the metaphorical gut.”

She took a deep breath now, not looking up from her hands as she talked about her episode that morning, still feeling so drained despite her nap during the afternoon.

“While that admittedly isn’t the start of my trauma, the nuke that dropped, as it were.”

Rick, all he wanted was to move around the table and wrap her up in his arms, but knowing that touching her was a dangerous game right now. Yes, the hugs on the couch had been fine, but that had been while she had been in tears, or near tears, and now she was neither. He did however reach across the table and rest his hand over hers that was clasped in front of her on the table.

When she looked up from her hands, he could almost feel the way her breath caught, and the shock of the sting of his tattoo was of little surprise this time when her wide eyes met his.

“It’s alright Talia, I promise, whether we’re together or not, I won’t let you have to go through any of this alone again.”

Chris looked between the pair,

“Would it help, if I could confirm, that you two are, without an absolute doubt, soulmates.. Because doctor's false diagnosing, parents' stupidity, and fake tattoos, it can all happen, but this effect from your tattoos can’t be faked right here, and you two are struggling with it something awful..”

Chris half cringed at the look Ricky gave him then,

“You knew?!”

“I suspected. I still can only suspect really, there is no proof for this kind of thing. It’s only theoretical, the theory, is that it's a trauma response for soulmates. Your soul bond has responded to both of your suffering, once you met, it must have triggered something, and now it's gone into massive overdrive.. Theoretically, it’ll calm down once the bond has formed naturally.”

And before Talia telling them what she’d gone through, he had no idea her side of it.

“Theoretically?”

He cringed again when Talia asked softly,

“I don’t know anything for certain, JellyBean.. I only know the theory, I have read everything I can get my hands on about the bond between soulmates, ever since.. Well..”

“Ever since when?”

He sighed as he looked at her, now it was his turn for a bit of a confession, wasn’t it? Glancing at Ricky, he knew the story, but Talia didn’t, and it wasn’t an easy one to tell. He supposed she might know of some of it as a fan, but a lot of it was missing, a lot of it never got out, thankfully.

“From my own time being committed.”

Dividers by @saradika-graphics (roses) & @cafekitsune (trigger)

[self-care-club]

Welcome to the Self-Care Club! I’m happy you’re here. This blog aims to provide support, positivity, tips, and resources for people struggling with their mental health, dealing with disorders, who are neurodivergent, or who just need some optimism in their life.

This blog is a safe space for people of all ages, races, sizes, genders, sexualities, abilities, and religions.

I welcome discussion, but I do not tolerate hate speech or discrimination.

I also welcome questions, however I am not a mental health care professional. If you are having suicidal thoughts, you’re in danger, or you need professional support, please call or text one of the following hotlines.

Suicide and Crisis Line- Call or text 988 (US)

National Sexual Abuse Hotline 1-800-656-4673 (US)

National Domestic Abuse Hotline (US)

International Emergency and Suicide Hotlines

A bit about me

My name is Valerie. I am 31 years old. I am a teacher, a photographer, a queer woman, and mom to two cats and two dogs. I have struggled with mental health concerns for more than half my life. I have experienced severe depression, anxiety, multiple eating disorders, suicidal thoughts and attempts, emotional abuse, ADHD, and sensory issues.

I have a lot of personal experience with psychiatric medications, psychiatry, and therapy.

Again, you are welcome to send me messages asking advice or seeking support, but I cannot provide professional mental health help.