#this has probs been done but thats okay

[queewp]

atla mer au where all the nations are diff 'fish'

Fire Nation as reef sharks, Air Nomads as flying fish, Water Tribe(s) as seals, and Earth Kingdom as catfish (?)

rlly iffy on the catfish part </3

probs wont draw it digitally but pushing that lil idea out there cuz its mer may

if u have better 'fish' ideas for the different nations defo tell me, think thatd be silly

[b4kuch1n]

what if I stream tonite. for dragon business

[abyssalreds]

gege needs to retire his character death note and hand it off to asagiri i swear 😭

[phagodyke]

ok moment over its all good

oh who am I fucking kidding. I'm not gonna go am I.

[disenchanteds]

okay now ep 2

the wild card is literally they are always starving but they cannot eat normal food they have to chomp on stones and dirt and grass and wood and everything that isnt usually food and each one gives them a different effect (including poison) and they have to figure out which foods actually feed them AND THEN it gets randomised every like hour or so? (they have 3 hour recording sessions so idk exact timing so) and so they start from square one again and there was A Lot Of Death

now so every life series cows are important for food u see but then thats where all the mayhem and stealing happens and impulse goes over to gem and joel to accuse them of stealing his team's cows when they didnt and it was actually martyn but none of them know that and so the next time scott cleo pearl and impy comes over gem says "i dont like you impulse" AND THEN SHE TURNS AROUND AND SAYS TO PEARL "and i dont LOVE you because you betrayed me last season" and just the pure fact that gem said love instead of like for pearl??!? the fact that she just rounded on pearl like that even though pearl has done nothing??? *cries in despair* and now we have gempearl divorce arc

TO MAKE THINGS WORSE bdubs found out that cobblestone wall causes poison and gives it to pealr and asks her to eat it but pearl already knows what it does so bdubs asks her to give it to someone else and she tries to give it to gem but gem refused and did not want to trust her even when pearl said she would eat it with her and then pearl eventually gives up and walks away while saying "i should try this on someone else but everyone else is my ally" BUT GEM OVERHEARD IT and turns to scott who was just standing there and said "wHy would she say that SHES INSANE" even though from pearl's pov u can basically tell that pearl believed that with gem she wouldnt take the aftermath too hard and would laugh about it with pearl and then forgive her while others might not but GEM TOOK IT THE WRONG WAY AND UGHHHH

and then heres more stuff they've said on livestreams

basically gem has been playing through subnautica and there was this one scene where a person breaks up with someone else and says the line "i would like to reduce our hours together. to zero" and gem basically reacts to it by saying "wow i've never heard a breakup line so cold before...reduce our hours together to zero. i should try that line on pearl" head in hands WHY gem WHYYY

and then pearl on her stream said "why are people saying i betrayed gem when she was actively trying to kill my mounders (her alliance team) the whole time and i actually allied with scar for the last episode and never had any actual alliance with gem so really she betrayed me first" and guess what SHES RIGHT. i really need to lock them in a closet and have them talk it out i swear. and during the secret life finale even, pearl literally said to gem "lets sword it out gem lets sword it out" when pearl couldve killed gem with a bow easily and pearl is also better with an axe and has lost to gem multiple times with a sword but idt gem heard it and scar and gem were already battling it out so now we have gempearl divorce. i am both so enthralled but also in pain. save them please

there is actually so much more that happened in this ep but i'll prob talk about it tomorrow together with ep 3 because im sleepy eepy and i have to watch ep 3 that just came out too

OKAY OKAY TOXIC YURI TIME OKAY. gem NO DON'T DIVORCE HER but also I am SO here for it they should get more toxic but also PLEASE DON'T CAN YOU BE HAPPY PLEASE but also YESSSS TOXIC YURI

[fairytoge]

(some of) the jujutsu kaisen cast as bastille songs (from 'all this bad blood')

notes!!

i love bastille sm so i thought, why not?? also there are spoilers of shibuya arc and most recent manga chapters!!!

m.list

pompeii

this could pretty much be any character icl, but i feel like it's mainly yuuji?? just cos its still such a weirdly positive song for how dark the lyrics actually are. that said, it could also be gojo,, mainly just because i feel like he would be able to see the parallels between megumi, yuuji, and nobara compared to his own high school friend group, and he seems reminiscent like 89% of the time.

things we lost in the fire

nanami. JOKING... kind of. but seriously, i feel like it fits yuuji again because poor boy is going through it especially in the whole of the shibuya arc??

bad blood

idk why but i just feel like megumi would listen to bad blood? and also cos of the semantics of the lyrics!! basically it's the breakdown of a relationship, and i think it could def be applied to him and his childhood. and it could also be applied to the whole thing he has with sukuna and everything that he's done while being possessed(?),, and the deterioration of his relationship with himself.

overjoyed

this song is sosososooo angsty like?? but yeah, it fits all three gojo and geto and shoko!! it probs most applies to gojo and his feelings/emotions towards geto after his departure and the mass murdering thing he did. def a song i would sob to icl

weight of living

this fits nanami and shoko scarily well, like you can't convince me otherwise. those two with their eyebags and stuff definitelyyyy have heavier emotional baggage than they let on about their friends and death and stuff. that's ignoring that they're canonically the heaviest drinkers or wtv!!!

oblivion

oblivion is heavily implied to follow the story of a couple (whether platonic or romantic) where one is thinking about the other and the loss of them. it's vvv emotional and probs something that gojo would never listen to unless he was alone and properly in a sad mood, but it fits them scarily well imo.

get home

it fits nanami weirdly well? along with gojo (but, at this point, pretty much every song fits him lol), megumi, and yuuta i think? megumi mainly because of his lack of current ambition to continue living, and all that he's been through recently. and then yuuta fits this song in the period around rika dying?

poet

I LOVE THIS SONG SM okay, so i think it fits yuuta!!! like the period of time just after jjk0 where he sees rika for the final time and accepts her death and all that came with it. but it's definitely a more positive song, and could also acknowledge his development as he gains friends and accepts his new version of life!

what would you do

the woman being described in this kind of reminds me of toji, but i don't know if thats me being delusional about him actually trying to be a good father. the speaker would probably represent gojo, but him as a teenager as it kind of seems like a more immature pov.

skulls

this song is literally depicting a couple as they stay together, even after death so it doesn't need to be said butttt, gojo and geto for sure!! along with nanami and haibara i think too!

© fairytogeㅤ ꔫㅤ please do not copy, repost, translate, etc without my permission

[s0lar-ch3ri]

OAUGUOAGHUAHGJK2WEFJNRGJTW?f??????????????????? HELLO??????????????????? DUE YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME IM THE DAKOTA KINNIE EVER.

"THEY WERE ALL ALONE" DIES AM ILLION BILLION DEATHS.

OKAY IM GONNA FUCKING RAMBLE THEN

SPOILERS FOR THE GREYSCALE ARC, WHICH IS LIKE. EP 34-36 S2 I THINK AND ALSO ALL EPS BEFORE IT ARE FREE GAME FOR ME

vyn - being alone must be new for a guy who got used to having people in his head. he was always around a friend or something. yet, even in that elevator, with tide (i think tides unconscious body was in there) physically there and origami in his head, he still talks about himself solely. huh, funny. sol-ely. vyncent sol, yet its never really been sol-ely him. hes not somebody who can be alone physically, yet hed know the feeling of being alone so well. an alien to this planet, unable to tell someone whod understand how he feels. he isnt able to listen to his friends, however, because they dont talk. and sure, he does that, but i dont think they realise it. hes alone because hes the only one here whos put more then random thought into his choices. hes alone because hes stepping down from a choice he regrets.

will - being alone is not something new to will. hes been used to being a loner since the start of his unlife. hes a man who couldnt seem to commit well enough to his plans. he ran from being a hero, hes ran from his powers, yet for once hes made a choice. a choice hes not running from. so why is he standing alone. why is everyone looking at him like hes made the worst decision of his life. maybe because he has, but it hurts the most that even his best friend wouldnt stand by him for this. he couldnt blame him, thats for sure, but that didnt make it hurt less. this time, will doesnt want to be alone. not when hes done this. hes alone standing by the wrong choice he made hoping to turn it right.

dakota - hey i actually touched on how dakota probs felt in my lil cover of vyncent in a vador i did ("kota in the bago", never put it on tumblr but if requested, ill see what i can do)! maybe dakota has learned by now that he can ask his friends for help, but does he *know* he can? hes failing all the checks to look for lightspeed. this is his first time where hes been seperated from his team since they came back together, and hes doing horridly. he would never want to rely on his friends, thats not something someone as great as the dc would need to do. hes really just alone, left out of the other adventure as he does his own job to help. then he finds the chaos that happened when he wasnt there. maybe it warmed his heart the smallest amount to hear they missed him, that in a way he kept them in line, in a way he was needed. it felt horrid, but he couldnt help it. cantrip became another person he failed to save, because he couldnt have possibly been there to help her. so maybe it wasnt just that dakota was alone that hurts him. he left his boys alone when they needed him most. he left them alone.

[itsjustelian]

Why Tanizaki is most definitely being chosen for the ADA and PM switcheroo.

1. It has been mentioned how suited for assassination Tanizaki's ability is.

2. He's also the only ADA member without an arc (idk if Kenji counts, but he's too lovely to be moved over, and he sees the Agency as a side job).

3. Man goes bat shit crazy for his sister. He would most def kill a guy if the Mafia held his sister hostage.

4. He tried to kill Mori during the Cannibalism arc.

On why it can't be anyone else:

1. Ranpo is the backbone of the Agency, him being taken would be detrimental to them. That and I don't think he'd willingly work with the Mafia at all. (Especially if Fukuzawa dies this Arc)

2. Yosano is off limits. The agency would defend her being off limits. Even if Fukuzawa never told her the limits of the deal, Ranpo would prob be able to deduce what he said. Even though she's Mori's first choice in things.

3. Kunikida is in line to be the next Agency boss and cares far too much for his ideals and morals for the Mafia to even want him.

4. Atsushi's the main character, this one's pretty self-explanatory. His place is with the ADA and taking him away from them will ruin all the development that's been put into his character.

5. Kyouka just escaped the Mafia. And Atsushi most definitely will not let her go back. Also, the Mafia still has Kouyou, whose ability is practically the same (and I like to think Kouyou won't want Kyouka to come back).

5. Okay, the big one, Dazai. (This one is absurdly long because I'm taking these points from a debate I had with a friend (@randomanimeartist)and they think Dazai's going back, so yeah). Many of the agency members wouldn't let Dazai be chosen. Yosano knows he's had to work under Mori before and doesn't want him to go through that again, and Kunikida still wants a partner. Alongside that, Atsushi is just now starting to see Dazai instead of the orphanage director when he's stressed. (Dont know if thats a positive or not buTtt) Also, Atsushi still needs a mentor and returning Dazai to the mafia would reverse a ton of work done for his character (and he is the main guy so his development matters the most). Yes, Dazai has the potential to do evil, but he is actively trying to become a better person (if only for Oda). Whereas the only other member who has been seen to be capable of evil (that isn't Kyouka because we know she isn't getting chosen. Atsushi isn't letting go of her, and they already have Kouyou) is Tanizaki. He would literally do ANYTHING for his sister (?) and it's been shown the lengths he is willing to go. Also, Asagiri keeps mentioning that he's a boring guy who kind of just does what he's told, making him perfect Mafia material. I don't think he'll willingly go back. Mori keeps asking him if he wants his position back, and it's probably because he knows that if Dazai is forced to return, he'll just run away again. He's finally making progress, and I feel like going back just isn't an option he'll willingly take.

---

Apologies for how long this is, lol. I just think Tanizaki deserves his time to shine.

[orionsangel86]

God same about Jensen!

He clearly had some insight into Dean that came out intermittently I just thought it was Instincts he had because he'd internalised Dean so much but didn't actually understand what he was saying, stuck in ol' "oh haha Dean is a stupid repressed child who only likes guns" mindset

Turns out WE'RE the fools and Jensen's been playing us ALL

when do you think he took up plans to take over SPN himself? I honestly think it's when they decided to end SPN at S15 and talks about how they should end the story were going on and they had to send him to KRIPKE of all people

Yeah its wild. I would love for him (with Misha's help) to write a tell all book one day.

I feel like jackles has been a far better actor than we all gave him credit for. He has always been very switched on to fandom, he knew about the warring sides, the hate and the bullshit, and I reckon he was being told for years by his bosses to always keep all sides of fandom happy and to play his damn role at all times (ironically just like how Chuck ordered Dean to play his role - life imitates art too often in this fucking show its almost scary). Hence why he's insights into Dean often came across contradictory and odd. Sometimes he had beautiful accurate insights which make total sense, and other times (usually in j2 panels) he'd regress back to the "haha dean just likes guns and girls like a macho man should".

We will never truly know what went on behind the scenes following the moment j2m announced s15 was the end (unless jackles writes that book) so its hard to truly speculate when jackles decided to take things into his own hands, but I also believe it was around about the time they planned the finale and everyone was kissing jarpiss's asshole and jackles was left in the cold to stare down a shitty death scene he didnt agree with. Going to kripke was prob the final straw for him.

He was gaslit into thinking that ending was okay, and whenever he tried to question it he was told to sit down shut up and do what he was told, all the while watching his manchild tantrum throwing drama queen of a costar get his dick sucked by the entire production team for coughing a few times and puffing out his chest and singing the praises of a finale that pushed the spotlight firmly on him and his cop propaganda show.

So yeah, jackles was done dirty, and so he became That Bitch and started making plans. He had the production company set up only days after the finale aired, turned off his social media and refused to be involved in any spn finale celebratory CW PR (absolute King Shit)

I think he started making calls before they even finished filming. Dean wasnt even cold on the ground before The Winchesters had been dreamed up as a way to bring him back. Jackles rare few post finale SM posts all alluded to Dean returning again. He knew what he was doing.

At the same time he was ghosting the manchild, and planning to move his family to Colorado to get away from him. After SPN finally wrapped in mid 2020, him and Jarpiss went their separate ways. They barely spoke after that. Jackles was setting in motion all his plans to fix everything that he considered a personal afront to him (because he is absolutely deranged and literally possessed by the ghost of Dean Winchester) and those plans certainly involve fixing the ending somehow - in a way that isnt obvious no doubt, because he still has to be careful and at least pretend like he respects the ending and his egotistical douchebag of a costar (though he hasn't been doing a very good job of either tbh!)

Thats all my speculation anyway. Holding out for that tell all book jackles!

[mediawhorefics]

hií 💗 for the ask game, what's your favourite fanfic of all time?

oh god i read in so many fandoms this feels like an impossible question dhjfjfdg i'm gonna cheat. is that okay? can i cheat? there's no way you're getting just one. sorry not sorry djbkndkjgbd

i guess if i'm answering 100% honestly, it would prob. be not easily conquered which, for those who don't know is a stucky fic and one of the most beautiful pieces of writing i've ever read. some of the quotes from this fic are seared into my brain and i fear will never leave me.

in the 1d fandom tbh it's still tif. i think to me tif is a perfect romcom. i've never read a better one. it's funny, its heartwarming, it's genuine, the miscommunication is handled very well and that quote that describes trying to explain something traumatic that happened to you young as 'like a fish trying to explain what water is' stayed with me for over a decade. it's exactly that. that's exactly what it feels like... i love this fic sm. it's just as good as everyone says and i think its criminal that some newer fandom peeps haven't read it. i can only aspire to be that kind of writer.

i recently went on a spuffy binge read ad discovered summerfrost's works and i have been in absolute awe of their characterization ever since. their writing knocked me the fuck out. nothing safe is worth the drive (follow you home) is prob. my fav but everything i've read from them has been a masterclass in character study.

the poet dean fic is another work that i think is a game changer. if you're remotely interested in deancas/spn this fic is stunning and it features original poetry by the writer that is just.... gorgeous. it makes me want to write poetry and god knows i am not good at that rip.

cinderwings is another spn fic that's ..... incredible. it's such a creative au that perfectly mixes elements from canon and from fairy tales to create something totally new that feels fresh and different. not to mention i've never read a character pov of a quote unquote creature that actually felt like i wasnt reading a human character. it's done so well.

four letter word for intercourse . its the best smut heavy fic i've ever it. its deancas. end of.

i recently started reading good omens fics and Demonology and the Tri-Phasic Model of Trauma: An Integrative Approach ??? w o w. just.... w ow. if you've read the book/watched the show and loved crowley just a little bit... read this. it's an outsider pov and it is so compelling, it's almost impossible to put down. which is a pretty herculean feat imo considering it's all through the eyes of a stranger. its basically crowley in therapy through the eyes of his therapist. incredible.

back in the old days i read a lot of merlin fics and the student prince still has SUCH a special place in my heart as a comfort fav... it's so funny and heartwarming. the perfect magical uni au. it also has an amazing podfic read by the author.

wastelands is probably my favourite star wars fic i've ever read. it's only 9k and ft just before the sequel trilogy leia crash landing on some abandoned world and getting help from a force ghost to repair her ship only to realise it's anakin. it's just.... a beautiful beautiful character study and a look into their relationship and it ties in with some kylo stuff.

you could dress this wound is a tsn fic where mark starts seeing pain as light on people and develops some empathy/starts seeing the world (and his relationship to eduardo) differently as a result.

best practices in workplace relationships is nothing special. except its heartfelt and funny and i've read it countless times over the past ten years. so many times. it's the assistant wardo fic. it's fun. i love her.

also anything that @helloamhere writes but ESP the anakin/padme/obi fic she wrote partly because of me.

i think thats it... like... off the top of my head today right now.

oh and i guess.... if it's not arrogant to say it ? maybe tts ? just... i'm very very proud of it and it's very special to me. i dont think its better than any fic ive listed here but it is one of my all time favs because it was a big labour of love from me.

[souwrrr]

also!!!!! im super duper intrigued by tartaglias whole story its actually really interesting i wish he got more screen time in chapter iv 🙁🙁 i saw this REALY good animatic about his experience in the abyss and stuff with the fatui abd all the awful stuff hes been through !!! it was genuinely so cool but its also kinda what brought me back into this game and i am not happy abt it

i kinda wonder abt childes opinions on all of the other harbingers as well as his battle hunger?? he realllyy idolizes getting stronger and fighting everything and everyone he can and its definitely bc of skirk and what had happened in the abyss that mustve been hell for him

i also wonder what he would do if teucer and tonia found out about all the people he has hurt??? ofc he has done SO much to help them and keep them safe and ig if traveler can overlook it so can they but i do wanna see a genuine reaction from them.... i also want to see their reaction to the damage tartaglias delusion has done to him!! considering he went back to ice kingdom or whatever after his fight with that whale, wouldnt they have seen him in his weakened state ?? honestly hes prob really good at hiding it as a means to not scare his siblings since he cares for them so much. i wonder why childe continues using his delusion despite its danger? like he even gave traveler his vision before trying to pick a fight with clorinde but he kept his delusion? i mean i get that the vision was malfuctioning but the delusions is really. Bad. i wonder if he thinks its worth it because it makes him so much more powerful?

okay back to opinions on other fatui... scara doesnt seem to respect him all that much? idk about the knave their voice overs about each other are interesting but theyve interacted pretty positively and even trash talked other fstui members LOL since its pretty obvious thry dont trust each other that much i guess they just have to pretend to like each other but id like to think they get along in unique ways.... but scara said that they all use each other for benefit so he kind of admitted it wasnt so good. i remember the first impression players had of him was that he was super strong and important and stuff (not that he isnt!!!!!!) but he is still the eleventh harbinger .... so i guess thats why hes looked down on so much and seen as reckless (but thats also just bc he is.....) i am glad that we still get more interactions w him but lowkey i think he is going to die soon and i seriously do not like that he 😭😭😭😭 hes a character i genuinely have come to like!! at least 4 now

i wish i paid more attention to him earlier on in the game bc i would always just get pissed off everytime he said anything bc i likd many at the time that he was an annoying ed sheeran water guy and i am so embarrassed i thought that for SO LONG i think i was annoyed bc everyone had a crush on him or at least a few people i didnt like being obsessed with him and not even his story just how he looks brah like come ONNNN i might have more thoughts in the future but these are a few for neow

[circular-bircular]

Mmm. I caught a few free minutes today to sit down and respond, so let's unleash this one, shall we?

Below the cut is an ENORMOUS ask, and a (incredibly long, as much as I may try otherside) response. It's about the recent "censorship" (???) drama.

TL;DR: Everyone is allowed to be angry in life, and policing that is kind of outrageously infuriating, especially in spaces where people struggle with things like emotional regulation! I'm allowed to be upset and express that upset, just as much as anyone else. Me expressing frustrations isn't "demonizing" people or attacking them, and I'm sorry if it comes across that way. If you feel I'm attacking you by posting on my own blog how I'm upset about something, or feel I'm attacking you by reblogging posts on tumblr to dissect ableism in articles you yourself posted... Figure out that feeling, or block me? Good lord.

I am not posting anything more about this topic. Please don't send asks about it, or I will simply be deleting them.

Okay. For context, these two asks (combined below) came in about 3 days ago. I was wondering if I should post them in a different format to slim them down, but genuinely, I think I want to present this as I received it. Here it is (with your system name censored, anon -- I recognize your concerns about harassment):

abt frameaclouds post :: politely + trying to come to the table not to argue but to point this out I dont think you can blame a blogger for seeing people reblogging their post from you legit screaming "how dare you" or "fuck you" at them and them then assuming that it's probs best to just block and keep back from that whole group of folks. I liked some of your additions and thought they were interesting as one of frameaclouds followers.... but the way you and others focused almost entirely on nitpicking LB Lee's stuff and some ways things were phrased (ex. - like point 3; all frameacloud said was that DID does not require trauma. you then... agreed and shouted at them?), and the way a lot of you jumped to calling it censorship and silencing when frameacloud refused to engage afterwards, really kind of makes it look like you're interpreting their post and actions in the worst light possible. it makes it seem like you're coming from a place of bad faith. you mentioned some cool perspective in your reblog, where you talked about how it came off to someone who had your specific background and knowledge and what u found the issues to be, but you haven't done the reverse: you haven't considered how your reblog was going to come across to an otherkin whose been around for a really long time and who is probably used to dealing with tons and tons of trolls who are going to take what they say in the least generous way possible, twist their words, + use it to belittle and harass them. like this is an otherkin who's been around since the grilling times and usenet days. and a bunch of people who seem to be in ur circles citing back to the post and kind of beating their chests about it even tho frameacloud is making a point not to fight or argue about it and to just block and move on...and u urself described ur response as a 'rant' which has a pretty diff connotation than 'discussion' or 'criticism'...well its likely to just project that kind of image further, that ur just here to flame war, even if thats not what ur doing or how u want to come across. ik that's how it came across to me and even after seeing some of ur past posts on ur blog that i really liked im still a little skeptical that this ask isnt gonna be either trashed mocked or taken out of context by u or someone who follows u. and also i want to remind people that like......... u r not owed access to anyone on socmed. frameacloud and any other blogger is allowed to block anyone for any reason. and its unhealthy to say that ur owed other ppls blogs and posts to platform on. respect other ppls boundaries without villainizing them cuz otherwise ur just opening up a can of worms to lie in. and ik u said in a later post that theyre well within their rights to block u but u also reblogged a post before that calling it censorship. so like... this is what i mean about coming off as disengenuous and troll-y, stuff like this is why even if i liked some of ur reblog i wont rb it. if i rb it and end up deleting it later am i gonna be told by others that im 'censoring' u? if i make a mistake and say something wrong in a tag am i gonna get jumped with a 5k word essay from four different ppl telling me how much i suck? its a hypothetical but only sorta with whats been happening on ur blog and elsewhere in this discussion. its bad form and its not super fair to frameacloud who still hasnt done legit anything yet but block ppl and i really cant say enough how much i dont blame them with some of whats been said n what sort of conclusions ppl r jumping to abt them. (also now that im thinking of the context if u did come across as bad faith engagement to frameacloud then they probably didnt respond to ur ask because it screamed BAIT to them cuz ik in their shoes id think the same. i mean their blog 99% runs on queue...the last post they reblogged that wasnt on their queue was ONE post on the 11th from their boyfriend and be4 that ONE on the 9th...all while u have someone gossiping in a prev ask that they 'often do this'. i can see frameaclouds POV)

like i swear im not trying to start a fight but can u see how this comes off. claiming u want a discussion and then thanking someone who is calling blocking censorship, saying that theyre in their rights to block but then posting an ask that says this blog that makes maybe like two or three original posts a month "does this often", the original aggro all over the reblogs that stem from ur first reblog in the reblog chart... like frameacloud is the one who blocked first but u have to srsly consider why they did + why they refuse to engage at all + what it looks like to ppl outside of the type of syscourse ur used to, like them and like me. if u want ppl to listen, then this isnt a good way to promote the kind of discussions u say u want. it just drives ppl away and maybe it feels temporarly vindicating but its not helpful. i want to see the things ur talking abt talked abt more but if its always going to be like that and theres no way for it to be less like trekking thru a field of mines where someone might blow up at u for something u dnt even realize is wrong at the time then i dunno

...

So, first off, I apologize profusely to everyone for how long-winded I am. I write a LOT, a habit I have always, always tried to break, and I now realize just how much it is to see thousands of words in response to things. This is nearly 1k of words I woke up to right before leaving for my vacation. Talk about wild to read right after waking up. (I also apologize because what follows is similarly so long winded and I cannot figure out how to not do this).

I attempted to write up my response. Took a full day and a half, writing and writing and writing. And here's the thing, I wrote around 3k words trying to explain my perspective, trying to acknowledge what I agreed and disagreed with from your asks, from your perspective, and just...

Dude, I am so fucking done with this shit. Not your asks in particular, but with syscourse in general.

This ask presents me with a damned if I do, damned if I don't scenario. I could leave it to rot in my inbox, but then I'm a hypocrite for not engaging with discussions about things, which is what I say I want people to do. I could finish writing up my 3k+ word response, but then my words are going to be twisted as they always are because I'm long winded and I am just trying my best to (probably over)explain myself.

Or... I can just. Explain as briefly as possible here what I'm feeling, thinking, and doing.

So... Here goes my best shot.

One:

First and foremost, I could care less at this point about frameacloud. Good fucking lord, I have tried to keep their username in my head through all of this, but it's genuinely so hard and I just end up scrolling up. I have never interacted with this user before this, and I clearly won't be again. My beef is not with them. I could care less about this user or their business; they are a tumblr user who exists. Wow!

My upset was about how the conversation was cut off. That's all. That's it. Wow, it sucks how all conversations are cut off when people block others for any reason. I hate how long MY blocklist is, strictly for my mental health. I hate how many people I have to block to keep myself healthy, because it cuts off communication. Is it... condemning myself to saying, "It's a shame that they cut off communication like that" when I've blocked plenty of very vocal syscoursers?

No. As I've said numerous times through all this, people should be able to block whoever they want. Even if I talk about how upsetting that may be, I mean absolutely no ill will to the person who literally should not know I'm talking about how upset I am, because said person has me blocked.

Two:

I don't care why they blocked me. Maybe they personally hate me, maybe they heard about me from who-is-page or whoever (I know I've bumped heads with them in the past once or twice before), maybe they thought I was a troll, maybe they thought I was overly angry, whatever-

That literally means nothing to me other than " :( Fucking goddamn it, that means my response will be hidden."

What I am upset about isn't that they blocked me; I'm upset that the conversation was cut short and hidden in all aspects. By that I mean, I don't care I was blocked and hidden; I care that every single user who reblogged either me or SAS's reply was also hidden. Like. Every single tag was. I don't know if that's tumblr's doing, or OPs doing, or what have you, but again -- it doesn't matter.

All I'm saying is "damn, buddy, that sucks."

Three:

They didn't respond to my ask, and I mentioned that in my follow up post to show I tried to reach out genuinely. I didn't want people to think I was posting this without trying to reach out originally. That was all. It was once again me complaining that the conversation was completely cut off, regardless of the reason why it was cut off.

And here's where I'll address the elephant that I see, or at least the first one.

I'm allowed to be however angry I want on my blog, on my posts, and in my life. I'm allowed to shout, curse, and be pissed off. And no, they don't need to engage with it, and no, I don't need to be happy about that fact.

This is a tumblr blog, sir.

I'm not a medical professional or a debater on a stage in front of a podium. I'm a 26 year old trauma survivor who got upset about a fucking severely ableist post. I think I should be allowed to be a bit pissy about it.

Being told so frequently recently that I need to "be nice to convince people" is such whiplash, because less than a year ago, I was that person. I was the person telling everyone to let go of their anger, to be nice to convince the other side, that everyone needs to be polite. I did this so much that I literally was known as the Respectability Politics Syscourser. That was a legitimate label I used. I was told so often that I was a filthy centrist and that I was worse than homophobic bigots because I was trying to get everyone to just be nice to each other. I got fucking harassed for simply posting "Everyone should respect each other" to the syscourse tags.

Is that healthy?

A topic I discuss most frequently with my therapist at the moment is reclaiming anger. I struggle severely with loyalty and fawning, convinced that if I show any negative emotion whatsoever, I'll be hurt and shoved aside and abandoned by those I love. (Ouch). Here's just a few things I've learned in the past year or so:

Anger is the part of you that knows you deserve better.

Anger is a form of self-love.

Anger is a secondary emotion; what emotion lies under it? (This is the one I struggle with the most)

In... Fall of last year (the exact month escapes me), I ended up blowing up due to how long I had kept myself censored and kept myself "polite" for others. Due to how much anger I'd shoved aside and kept under wraps for the benefit of others. Because being angry would "reflect badly" on me and my friends; because it would make what I had to share less accessible to others.

... I'm done with doing that. Therapist's literal orders. In fact, if my therapist had his way, I would not have a system blog, be part of any system servers, or talk to anyone online who has DID, because the fact fucking is, none of you are safe to talk to. It will always be a triggering space. (Thankfully, my therapist also acknowledges that he is a singlet, doesn't know my brain, and that I am my own person who can make my own choices).

If OP of the post decided to make a big huge post blowing up in anger and frustration at how horrible I am, good for them. If you block me out of anger, good for you! I do not care, because I will be happy you are doing what is best for you. I am happy OP did what's best for them.

And equally, upset that a convo about ableism was hidden.

That brings me to:

Four:

Out of all the shit said and reblogged through that little single blip on the syscourse radar (I think around 10 posts out of 20 in that single 24 hours), I do regret posting that ask about OP "doing this often". That one is on me, and tbh, I'm gonna delete it. It was drama, and I do try to avoid that. I hardly added anything to it, and while I know my perspective on why I posted it, I also acknowledge that it'll do literally jack shit to explain why. So I'm just gonna delete it and move on.

But in everything else, I was only lamenting the fact that every response was hidden beyond those agreeing with OP.

I thanked Candlelight (the first user to call it censorship from what I can see) for stating that the responses were all hidden, but moreover, for mentioning that they didn't agree with everything I said. I spoke on that post primarily driven by anger at Lee's ableism. I KNOW it was not a perfect post. That's because I'm not a Perfect Debater(TM).

All I wanted was A DISCUSSION ABOUT ABLEISM!

(Note: This is commonly seen as yelling; for me, via text, I see this as EXTREME EMPHASIS. Sorry it apparently comes across as yelling! I see it as yelling a bit in my mind, but I can see how the TONE is lost in those cases. Right now, my tone is exhausted frustration, but I see no need to ACTUALLY raise my voice at you.)

I think that's the thing that's pissed me off the most. Everyone and their brother wants to either agree or disagree with me about censorship. I have my own thoughts on censorship (it's basically always bad, but there's nuance on all things, is exclusion censorship, etc etc) but those are not relevant because nobody has even fucking addressed the ableism.

The articles -- linked by OP, but who gives a shit at this point -- came off as ableist. I reblogged OP's post because they are the ones who posted the ableist articles to the DID tags. That is how tumblr is used, is it not? And yes, I expressed my anger... at the articles... on the post that had the articles...

And OP hid those critiques for their own reasons... and I lamented that they were hidden... so I made a post about it while explaining the context ('Hey if you're wondering why I'm making this big huge long post AGAIN, OP blocked my response and everyone elses, and yes I have tried to resolve it, but this one's plan B for getting the word out that these articles and ideas are really harmful online')

Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh. You see why this is so hard to keep short, right? I surely hope so. There's a LOT to tackle here, and a lot of emotions, and a lot of different topics/nuances.

FIVE: RAPID FIRE ROUND (With Review!)

I don't care about otherkin spaces or know shit about them. They're triggering for me. Bluh.

I don't blame OP for blocking me.

I don't hate you or want to attack you for this ask, sorry you feel that way.

If someone deletes a reblog, I just assume they made a mistake reblogging it? Do people attack others for this shit?

I nitpicked Lee's response because Lee's response was the most ableist shit I've seen in a bit, and I did that on OP's post because they're the one who posted it.

I didn't agree that DID does not always need trauma? I explicitly said it is always trauma based? I'm so confused about that point.

Is "Ranting" seen as trolling now? I use "rant" to mean "Shit, I went on for a LONG time." It's synonymous with ramble for me.

I don't know how to break it to everyone, but posting online means it is inherently unsafe, and someone may attack you or blow up at you. It's the world wide web. It sucks. (That doesn't mean it's deserved or that I endorse that behavior; it's just... life).

Ugh.

At the end of the day, I just want to be able to have my fucking disorder and scroll tags about my disorder without seeing:

It doesn't need trauma to form

Traumagenic systems are 'obsessed with suffering'

Endogenic systems are 'healthy' forms of plurality (As opposed to DID)

Yknow. Syscourse in general.

And similar shit.

Is that too much to ask??

Anon; I know this doesn't address all of your points. I KNOW I haven't gone point by point like I wanted to. My original draft did that, but I only got halfway before hitting 3k words, and you seemed... really adverse to a long ra- ramble, not rant. Sorry? Ugh.

Just take this, and I hope this topic doesn't come back to me, because I'm kinda done with it entirely at this rate.

[aphnatasha]

LISTEN I've been wanting to make them as bjds for a year at least the urge is so strong it's grabbing my neck

Although in my case I want to do the designs I have of them and also I am determined to figure out how to design fat bjds cause I refuse to make my girl Mary thin 😤

I actually have no experience whatsoever with bjd making but I've been watching some videos and I might save to get a bunch of supplies 👀✨

Like part of the reason I'm so excited about it it's because it requires different skills – character design, hairstyling, painting, even sewing!!!! And idk it just brings me joy to be able to create something "out of thin air", so to speak

Okay rant's over wjfhejfhe I wish you happy holidays!!! ✨✨✨

BRO IVE BEEN WANTING TO DO BJD'S FOR AGES its only recently that i kinda want to make the sandersons sbndndndnd. i still wanna do the plushies first cuz im not super great with making things by hand and i dont have the materials to make bjd's of 'em yet. i do have some old dolls, but i get the feeling that if i try to work on them, theyre gonna get really badly messed up

initially i wanted to make the redesigns i have for some of my fave monster high characters so they look more monstery, mostly headmistress bloodgood cuz i am determined to make her look more like a dullahan cuz i have so many thoughts about that in particular and im a lil saddened they never really took that route, but its understandable cuz a) that'd probs take a lot of time to animate and b) dullhahan are actually really terrifying and i dont think they wanted to make her so scary that she'd frighten kids (i feel like if they did go that route, lil kid me wouldve fallen even harder for her than i already did and that is saying something sbdbdn)

i feel like you could probably use some kind of sculpting or modeling clay to add on to the dolls to make them fat, but idk what types of clay would work for that dbbdbd. like, ive seen so many people use clay to sculpt out horns or thicken and/or lengthen a doll's arms or legs, so i dont see why you couldnt do somwthing similar for mary

i swear its something about creating a 3 dimensional thing that feels so exciting and so intrinsicly human, if that makes sense? like, being able to make dolls and figurines and charms and stuff out of clay and puting it together onto something sturdy to make sure it doesnt fall to pieces, something people have done since forever and changed it over time with new materials to work with and new processes to use it just. idk if im maoing a lick of sense, i just woke up shdjdnnf

i dont really have much experience in the sculpting area, but i think thats what makes working with new mediums so much fun. just being able to mess around and learn firsthand what works and doesnt work and learning from that, using your old creations and inspiration for something new. thats part of the reason why i keep a lot of my sketches, even if theyre really old. i always wind up inspired by it, and i wind up recreating the thing with how i do art now, or i try to put it into a new medium i learned as a sort of testament to how much that thing meant to me

aahh, i rambled on too shdjjd. i really wanna make dolls of them now. maybe i should see if my community college has any sculpting classes, that way even if we dont quite learn to make human/human adjacent things, it might give me just the help i need to be able to do it

(⁠ﾉ⁠◕⁠ヮ⁠◕⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠*⁠.⁠✧ happy holidays!! ☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡*⁠.⁠✧

[rei-does-stuff]

MLP MYM LIVE BLOG

Ep one!!!

-THE MARE-STREAM!!!

-Sunny making sure Misty is okay EEE!!

-The way Hitch looks at pipp oooooo!!!!

-AWW HITCH DOING THE DEEP AND MANLY VOICE, I love how much of a dork he isss

-oh noo shes anxious :((

-“smooth sailing!” *immediate storm* Its the little things in this show i love <3

-HEY THEY ACKNOWLEDGED IT

-THE INTRO!!! Oh how I’ve missed you!!!

-OOO SONG!!! CATCHY!!

-AW HITCH IS THE ONLY ONE NOT GROOVING CMON MAN

-Little SunIzzy moment (they’re standing together)

-OH YEA SPARKY ISNT HERE

-AWWW MAMA FIGGY

-Convinced Sunny only suggested that bc she’s been BURSTING to share that story

-ALSO TINY SUNNY I MISSED YOU WE HAVENT SEEN YOU SINCE THE MOVIE!!

-She loved sellin shit even as a kid <3

-ARGYLE!!!! MY MAN!!!!!!!!!!

-Aw they couldn’t get his actual voice actor it seems (not even the one from tyt :()

-WAIT WHY DOES SHE HAVE THE YELLOW EYESHADOW AS A KID THATS RECENT I SMELL A CONTINUITY ERROR!!!!!!!!!!!

-jkjk maybe her dad put it on her, or she snuck into the makeup cabinet <33

-AWW SHES SO CUTE

-Aww siblings bickering <3

-AWW TINY ZIPP AND PIPP ARE CUTEE

-Epic <3

-That wasn’t flying! That was falling with style!!! /ref

-WONDERBOLT

-DONT USE YOUR DOG AS A TISSUE QUEEN HAVEN!!

-HITCH IS SOO CUTE

-SPROUT!

-OH so sprout’s talent IS kindness! Glad to know that! Like a knight in shining armor!!

-IZZY MY BELOVED

-That water animation,,, I did say it was SLOWLY getting better in the animation department…Slowly—

-Misty has social anxiety, we are the sameee

-She talks to herself! Just like me!!!

-IM JUST SAYING…T4T Zipitch it could work

-MAKEOVER!!!!!

-HA people pleaser sunny <3

-The red doesn’t work for me either

-I like the green!!

-AND THERE WE HAVE HER NEW MANE!!! I love itt

-Sunny being concerned :(((

-DONT LIE MISTY!! THEYLL UNDERSTAND!!

-OPALINE!!! I love herr

-YUP that will be a tad awkward but shell get through it!!

-Pipp my dramatic queen

-AWW THEYRE NICE!!!

-Aww Haven being encouraging

-It does look weird, them using utensils

-OH HAVEN IM SURE SHE DOESNT WANNA UNLOAD HER TRAUMA ON A BUNCH OF KIDS

-YOU ARE CUT OUT FOR THIS WORLD MISTY!!!

-Oh so we know opaline was never gonna give misty her cutie mark, nice nice

-YIPPEE

-trottie-talkies THAT IS SO CUTE

-POSEY!

-AWW ITS OKAY TO BE SHY MISTY

-NOO DONT CRY

-See I love how they tell her its okay!! In g4 I’m sure they wouldn’t done an ep telling her to just go out there and be confident but here they can be like “yeah! Its okay to be nervous! We can do something else!”

-SONG

-THEYRE CONCERNED ABT HER AAAA

AAAA THAT WAS SO GOOD

EP 2

-TINY MISTY????

-Those pancakes look sooo good

-Sunny trying to comfort the situation!!

-Sunny and Zipp act like a bickering married couple sometimes

-Aww yk Haven and Alphabittle are a cute couple ngl

-OUGH HES LOOKING FOR HIS DAUGHTER!!! FOR MISTY!!!

-TELL HER!!! DONT HIDE YOUR FEELINGS!!

-THEY ALL RUSH IN TO COMFORT HER :(((

-BREEZIES!!

-They all have the same hairstyle, reminds me of g3

-I wonder if the shit theyre saying actually means something if you slow it down, probs not but yk

-I have a feeling that Misty’s trauma with Opaline cause her to forget all this, maybe push it back deep in her head as a way to cope?

-Breezies using phones THE HORROR!!

-Ipad kids breezie edition

-Ur so funny sunny :)

-THE KEY FROM THE TRAILER

-ARG CLIFFHANGER

EP 3!!!

-SPARKY MAGIC!!!

-DRAGON LORE???

-AWW misty and sparky siblings arcc

-SONG

-Aww misty being selfless!!

-After sparky!!

-DRAGON LAND!!!

-it looks a lot more…Grassy compared to g4!

-No dragons…Ooooo

-BATS

-Ooo so we might get an episode abt hitch having to let sparky go!

-Look at pipp being smart!!

-LOOK AT THEM PUTTING TWO AND TWO TOGETHER!!

-OUGH HAPPY REUNION IM CRYING

-I THOUGHT THE THEORIST WERE CRAZY BUT THEY WERE RIGHT MANNN

-Im wondering how misty met opaline tho!! We knew she “rescued” misty but how??? I NEED ANSWERS!!

-I guess this also makes misty pipp and zipp’s step sisters! Sorry shippers!

-HITCH WITH A RAINBOW MANE LOOKS SO COOL

OKAY OKAY ILL WATCH THE REST TOMORROW BUT AAAA I LOVED THAT!!!

[jinkicake]

Today is the day🙂( well in like an hour and 45 mins) i see they posted his birthday art and he’s so precious🥹 like he’s funny af too “ i don’t really care about birthdays but if you’re gunna bother me all day🙄 you can stay” bitch do you want the present or not😒 making up at sunrise to tell him he looks very nice in blue, like im making his outfit rn and i forgot he had his shoulders out!! Like its a body suit w the ARMS CUT OFF. He really said if imma have a rebrand im gunna be the sluttiest character here😭 clearly took insp. from kaeya to have his chest out like that🙄like i want to kiss the lil electro mark on the back of his neck. About to shower this little bastard is so much love and affection😈 going to suck his dick bc side by side his blue outfit does look nicer; i saw a thing saying he probably doesn’t need to breathe so he just makes moaning noise for fun😭😭 the thought of him being a slut bc “this is fun” is HILARIOUS since he’s just along for the ride so we can go to the most secluded spot in mondstat-bc i would celebrate my birthday there first for sure- and and ride him until he’s crying😊 just whispering how proud i am of him and how pretty he is. Now then for ANNOYING SCARAMOUCHE i would sleep in too much effort bc he’s gunna wake me up ANYWAY like as soon as his eyes crack open he is planning how to be annoying for a full 24 hours bc tomorrow is a wrap. DEFINITELY they type to me like “it’s my birthday you’re not gunna let me do what i want🥺(😈)” when he keeps getting handsy all day. You’re out on a romantic date? His hand is stuffed in your pants and he literally could care less, its you who’s trying to make sure nobody notices. Strolls into inazuma like he owns the place🙄 just to fuck you in the shrine; me and him will be petty to that fox until we both die😤 def takes you to some hidden cave in sumuru w pretty plants and is like look at what i found; fails to mention they’re like sex pollen plants tho😒 so hes checking his watch as everything gets fuzzy and only then do you realize this place is very isolated🤨 nobody would hear you let alone be in this area. Fucks you like his life depends on it, he is using the day to be as sadistic as possible; probably tell you to ding happy birthday like you can talk😭 he has blankets and everything set up like i thought this was a picnic🤨the only thing he eating is you😔the type to get overstimulated easily but holds longer bc hes holding on by sheer willpower and to also make a huge mess. Like to him if he not light headed he’s not done. Fucking like 3 loads back i to you bc hes obsessed w watching you gush around him like he never does anything halfassed hes gunna make you scream every-time, biting you bc why thats how cats show affection and degrading you like hes doing any better “look at you making a mess and cant even help it”! And he only pulled out to not cum

scaramouche is so annoying T T like just say you want to spend time w us you loser! but he's so cute,,, so cute... I had a little party for him in my teapot keke

((two second side note... speaking of kaeya... did you see his new skin? when i heard about it i literally exploded like nothing from this game has made me happier than my meow meow getting the pampering he deserves! and the braid- the braid in his new skin im going to cry))

something in my brain shifted at the thought of kissing scaramouches electro mark... youre making me a scaramouche appreciator,, stop! smh his mark that probs hasnt been washed since it got put there LOL

O.M.G.... i never thought about him not making noises bc he doesnt breathe- yeah he's a slut through and through and i love it.. i love it T T my favorite puppet (raiden look the other way this is NOT about you.... not yet </333)

sharing a birthday with scaramouche is so cute bc i know he would do everything that you want to do and would prioritize your feelings over his because he's such a softie... what an angel. okay that's enough sweet scara im going back to crazy!scaramouche bc if you dont share a birthday w him then he would so take advantage of it like (aside from insecure scara who would hate his bday) he would so make you do everything that he desires since it is his day (and i wont fight him on it!!!!)

YOUUUU ARE FUCKING CRAZYYY IF YOURE GOING TO THE NARUKAMI SHRINE AND NOT FUCKING MISS YAE MIKOOOO- like howww could you pick scaras short ass over her?! hell no! (but fine since it is his birthday smh)

awww scaramouche fucking you everywhere (unlocked lol) in teyvat for your birthdays is so sweet ,, who knew he had a kind side? (i did)

[destinyc1020]

It wuld b great if this movie with Elvis culd focus on why 14 YEAR OLD Priscilla was with a 24 YEAR OLD MAN Elvis. It might hav been the "norm" back in the day bt its disgusting and a child is still a child, and i feel lik a lot of their relationship is glamorized or they dnt address that age gap at all. Ik hes famous bt frankly thats all i think of wen i see Elvis

I'm sure a lot of facts have become muddled over the years, so I only go by what Priscilla says herself.

It was definitely a very WEIRD rlshp by today's standards. 🥴

Supposedly, she was even sending him suggestive pics the whole entire time 👀, and her family was okay with it cuz they prob saw dollar signs 🥴

Not sure if that will be brought out in this film, but I def don't think Priscilla was forced into anything.

I don't think they got married until she was 18.... Still SUPER weird (esp since she was so young when they first met), but hey, she was a consenting and legal adult by then. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Like you said, plenty of ppl married young and had huge age gaps back then. Even in Bible times y'all lol 😆 😂 Wasn't Mary (Jesus' mother) like 13 already about to be a wife lol?

So yea, it's weird to us NOW, but back then it was a little bit of a different time. 🤷🏾‍♀️👀

I'm also sure if Elvis had been a lowly dishwasher from the South, her parents wouldn't have cosigned on their daughter having a rlshp with this grown man at her young age, but he was a famous celebrity. Just saying. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Again, I'm not sure what THIS movie will show, but if it does tackle that topic, I'll be interested to see things from her pov.🤔

I'll just say this.....Priscilla has never spoken badly about that aspect of their rlshp ever (from what I know). So if even she and her parents didn't really see anything wrong with it, I'm not gonna be mad at it on her behalf when she's not even mad herself lol 😂

What's done is already done.... The man is dead, and they divorced years beforehand anyway, sooo 👀

Here's a timeline and quotes in Priscilla's own words if you're interested in reading it.

Like I said, SUUUUPER weird 🥴, but she seems to never have seen anything wrong with their situationship/relationship. 👀 So, she was a willing participant, and obviously fell for him from the first time they met.🤷🏾‍♀️