#this guy is a very old fish made out of rocks. because why not? i dunno. is this a fossil pokémon? i wanna say probably?

[front-facing-pokemon]

[braxlrose]

maybe hcs about Bill's childhood and a bit of Tom's (twins in general)? I wonder what they liked to play and what damage and chaos they caused (☠️) it can also be somehow connected with the reader who is their friend and partner in crime! in the devilish era sense (if u can its would be nice if reader was Bills love interest/ i sm love childhood friends to lovers trope☠️😭) i love ur hcs and fics!!! lmao all those fights with bill would be so much fun😭 also the guy would definitely make a fake wedding with the reader..i know that🤷🏻‍♀️ besides the very concept of living with horny boys growing up lol.. Dayum ☠️ (srry 4bad engilsh)

↑wtf why Bill look so tall.. anyways they all look soo CUTE 🫡 baby GUS oh my ????🤭 and tom LMAOO 😭

a/n: they were adorable as children and I love this idea!! I haven't read Career Suicide yet, so some of these may be inaccurate, but again most are just headcanons that I don't have much to back up on besides their personalities

devilish headcanons

1996-2000

• you became friends with Bill and Tom when you were seven years old and bill had the biggest crush on you. he thought you were so cool and was even more happy when he found out you played guitar so he asked you to join Black Question Mark. you obviously said yes and you had so much fun rehearsing and hanging out with them

• one day at school bill asked you what your favorite cookie was and he practically begged his mom to help him bake those cookies for you. when he brought them in the next day he was so happy when you got excited for them.

• as you guys got a little bit older, you and tom would protect bill from bullies even if you got bullied too. but before you guys knew about what they were doing to bill, you would always clean up his cuts and kiss his bruises. after that, you would always walk with him, holding onto his hand tightly and try not to pay any attention to them.

• bill would pick flowers for you on valentines day because him and tom would pick them for his mom, and now that you were around, he'd get you some too

• when tom and bill looked more alike, you'd help them switch places in class and then act all surprised and be like "What do you mean? That's tom, Frau Schiller."

• they were little menaces, so when you were brought into the mix, they teachers all hated you. but they couldn't actually prove you were doing anything, which made it 10x more fun

• you and tom would always laugh about getting better grades in singing classes than bill and bill would just sit there like "🙄".

• you and bill had skipped class together (its like 4th grade, yall are like doing 4x8 idk why yall so lazy 🙄, but anyways), you guys did Stein, Schere, Papier (rock, paper, scissors) and Tom lost so he had to stay in class and pretend to be bill 💀. you and Bill were just walking around the halls when bill got the brilliant idea to pull the fire alarm. you two almost got caught but you were quick enough to run outside and get in line with the rest of your class.

• you and their mom are like best friends so you bake recipes with her all the time. like Puddingbrezel, Apfelstrudel, Apfelkuchen, Käsekuchen, Pfefferneusse, etc.

• you and tom tagged a couple buildings with spray paint

• you, tom and bill have sleepovers all the time and you guys would make a pillow fort and watch tons of movies.

• bills a very cuddly person, so he'd always end up wrapping his arms around you after you guys fell asleep in the fort

• you guys went CD shopping all the time and get tons of cds for your collection

• you would take nail polish from your moms collection and help bill paint his nails

• you moved to Magdeburg just around the time Bill and Tom's dad moved out. Bill wasn't as upset as tom was, but you still comforted the both of them. if your parents were divorced to, you'd also be able to empathize with them

• Bill and Tome step dad would invite you to go fishing with them on a boat on the lake whenever they went. you were basically apart of the family because you hung around so much so he didn't want to leave you out

• you and bill would play with his mom's makeup all the time and give eachother makeovers

• you, tom and bill once got caught trying to sneak a beer can out of the fridge and you guys all had to sit in time out. honestly, that just helped you guys be more sneaky about getting it

• if you have long hair, bill begs his mom to teach him how to braid hair so he can braid yours. he did this in the first place because you laughed at tom for not knowing how to braid hair and you were all like "you know how to braid hair, right bill?" and he was just like "😃😄😃 yeah."

• you three all used to have bonfires in the backyard. you guys would throw in paper and wood and all that shit and then go steal a lighter from the house. then you'd all grab some marshmallows and roast them

• when you guys were eleven years old, you walked in on him jerking off and you had literally no idea what he was doing at first so you just opened the door and stood there like "wtf 😀"

• you stole some cigarettes from your dad and you, tom and bill all smoked them outside of school for the first time. you were all coughing your asses off because you guys have never smoked before

• you three would all go to weddings together and play music for them.

• you and bill would play dress up all the time and you'd scream at anybody who said something to him about wearing a dress

• at nine years old, you and bill had a wedding and after that, he would always call you his wife and he was your husband. like if a teacher didn't partner you two up together he'd be like "but she's my wife!"

• his mom and your mom became friends too, since you guys spent so much time together and they'd be like "if those two don't get married one day, I'm losing faith in all love."

2000-2004

• you were up on stage, playing on the guitar with Tom and Bill on the night when Georg and Gustav came to see you guys. you were a bit hesitant at first, since you were used to only bill and tom, but you guys needed a bassist and drummer, so you agreed.

• after that, you guys all became a friend group pretty quick. even though at first the age difference was weird, you guys got past that and kind of forgot about it

• you five would go to the corner store all the time and would sneak candy in your clothes. even if you had enough money 💀

• movie nights 24/7, and you guys had to watch labyrinth. it was a must and bill would force you guys to watch it

• you and bill were already super close, but the older you got the more close you got and the more your relationship progressed.

• you had to be careful when walking around the house at first because you didn't know if you'd be fine, or you'd turn the corner and one of the four boys would be sitting there jerking off

• the more time passed, the more you got used to it and it got to a point where you'd just walk into a room looking for something and if one of them was jerking off you'd just walk right past them.

• they're literally saying the dirtiest, nastiest jokes all the time and you'll just be sitting there like "🙂 wtf man"

• they're a bunch of horny, pre-teen/teenage boys so hanging out with them can be a handful but they always treated you like one of the guys and never made you feel any different.

• even bill, even though you were his gf you were still his bestfriend so you guys would roughhouse and do dumb shit together and all that kind of stuff

• you sat and listened to bill all day while he practiced singing It's Raining Men for Star Search and always helped him out with stuff

• you went to Star Search with Bill, his mutter and his Oma and was so excited to see him on stage. when he came out you were smiling and cheering and clapping your hands as loud as you can. his singing voice is amazing

• you held him for a long time after he got second place. he was really sad and bawling his eyes out because he promised you and his Oma that he'd win for you guys

• you made sure he knew it was okay, and that second place is still amazing. but he still moped for days once you guys got home.

• you and gustav would make food together too. like cookies and milkshakes. it was tons of fun baking with him

• when you first got your period, the boys were super confused because you were holding your hand in front of your intestines (and yes its actually where your intestines are, your stomach is way higher than you think 😨 but back to this) they didn't have any idea what was going on until Georg was like "she probably got her period."

• the rest of them all looked back at him like "wtf is that?" and georg was like "it's where girls bleed out of their vaginas." after that, tom and bill thought you were dying or something because georg did a terrible job explaining what a period was 💀

• once their mom got home and say they were freaking out and she asked what was wrong and they were like "Georg says Y/n is bleeding out her vagina! She's dying!" and their mom just started laughing her ass off and grabbed you a heating pad.

• tom and bill were mad at their mom for a bit before she explained what was actually happening because they thought she was just gonna let you die. but then she explained it happens to all women and its just shedding the lining of a woman's uterus. and that you were laying on the couch like that because periods cause awful cramps that can hurt as much as heart attacks.

• they were extremely nice to you after that

• bill went to the store and bought you some chocolate and then rubbed your back for you. his mom was just standing in the doorway of the living room as you two sat on the floor watching a TV show with a bunch of pillows and blankets as bill rubbed your shoulders.

• you guys got high on weed all the time and you'd be laughing your asses off while bill would just be sitting around, super fucking paranoid about everything

• you and tom were little assholes in school, especially in science class💀 you two would fuck things up on purpose when doing experiments and your teacher hated you guys so much

• you, bill and tom once started a fire at school and you all got grounded for 2 weeks and suspended from school for 3 days

• you and bill would get matching clothes together

• when tom had sex for the first time at 13, he told all of you right away and you just started laughing 💀 he was super offended and was like "uhmm..wtf bro?!" and you were like "I just feel bad for the girl who had to sleep with a guy with a 3 inch dick who still has voice cracks." and his jaw dropped and went on a rant about how his dick was huge and that he didn't have voice cracks. his voice cracked like 6 times during that rant btw.

I hope you enjoyed this!!

taglist: @hearts4kaulitz @burntb4bydoll @spelaelamela @bored0writer @fishinaband @billsleftnutt @tokiiohot @bluepoptartwithsprinkles @saumspam @5hyslv7 @killed-kiss @memog1rl

[somewhereincairparavel]

🐚 Daughter of Neptune headcanons list 🌊 part one..

Note: I've never done a pjo hcs post like this with the aesthetic pictures and everything- but I've been Itching to make a daughter of Neptune one, since I consider myself as a Neptune child. So this is sort of a self insert haha, and I thought it'd fun cuz I have so many hcs abt this, I've only over seen ppl do a daughter of Poseidon one.

Also this one has reader x Jason Grace as romantic pairings, but it isn't the main focus. Like I said, this is a self insert, and I love my bb jason ;) + imagine having Percy as a big brother, goals fr

• Okay so you'd come to Camp Jupiter at the age of 8-9, so you definitely have a considerable amount of childhood before you came to camp. Which only made it harder for you to adapt to the barbaric ways the Roman camp worked.

• Also, Since Neptune was not a very respected Roman god, your arrival was considered bad luck. Octavian made you go through an intense trial (that motherfucker was like 10 years old and an augur, and was already such a bitch lol) + forced a newly elected praetor Reyna (who was also just 10 at the time) to hold a senate meeting before you were even offered a position at camp.

• Neptune is very feared by the romans though, since he represented the harsh brutality of the ocean, so you got the Roman Nico di Angelo treatment from camp. Everyone was scared of you, flinched when you walked passed them. this was to your advantage tho, since you never got bullied, mostly out of fear.

• so Neptune temples in Camp Jupiter are only taken care of by you, if you left for a quest or something then the shrines would be in such a horrible state, bc no one cares enough to offer Neptune anything or even clean up his shrine. You'd do the cleaning and offering.

• and the worst part? Your dad wouldn't even notice you even after your efforts.

• okay, your powers are quite similar to Percy's butt I feel like since Roman/Greek siblings always have powers that compliment eachother, you'd have better control over the earthly side of the domain. Like you can cause longer earthquakes, control seismic waves, and make volcanos erupt + cause bigger avalanches, Stuff like that.

• Your water control was actually a little limited, up until Percy arrived and helped you enhance your powers. And you helped enhance his control over earthquakes, since his earthquakes usually only lasted for a few seconds, his dad is more water dominant. So when you met him, you knew he was a missing puzzle piece in your life. You'd even be able to communicate telepathically to Percy underwater, a power you both never knew you needed.

• Seriously tho it would be hilarious to look at, bc to the others, you both sound like squeaky dolphins but in reality you are just telepathically speaking with one another. The others wouldn't understand, and poor Frank would be so confused as to why you both are making strangled fish noises

Leo would troll you guys so bad for this lol

• your eyes would actually be black. Not blue, not sea green, just black. Your eyes would literally glitter like black obsidian rocks. because Poseidon is the calm side of ocean, hence sea green eyes for Percy, Neptune is the dark and scary side of the ocean, so that's black eyes for you. that difference would clearly reflect in your guys's eye colours AND personality (I'll expand on this more in part 2)

• but your scariness comes with a downside, you had no friends. No friends, except Jason and Reyna. it's just your dad's naturally strict aura surrounding you that makes your overall personality a Lil grumpy and moody tbh. You did have such a resting bitch face that wasn't helping either.

• Jason, being the noble boy he was, knew you were going to be his friend the moment you made a dramatic entrance to camp for the first time, getting scouted by the waves to New Rome. He knew what it was like to have a powerful, scary dad, but he acknowledged and empathized that you had it harder than he did. He was considered a golden boy, while you were considered a scary bad luck charm. But regardless of that, Jason was your first best friend. And eventually, your boyfriend.

• Reyna on the other hand, badly wanted to befriend you because she admired your mental strength, you were 9 years old and you were openly scoffed at by the legionnaires simply because your father was a scary man. Yet you handled it all so well. But she befriended you a little later than Jason did. Since she was so busy, she barely had any time to chat with anyone. You, Jason and Reyna bonded as a trio when you guys had your first quest.

• Reyna secretly shipped you and Jason from the very beginning lol, bc a Jupiter x Neptune union? Y'all were powerful and cute af together. The mutual pining drives her crazy though, like kiss already smh.

• Also, Nicknames! Your nickname was ALWAYS "kelp head" because your hair was wavy and shaped like seaweed lol. As much as you hated to admit it, the name fit a little too well.

• okay enough with the friendship stuff, let's talk about how much that bastard Octavian makes it his mission to make your life a hellhole. It isn't even funny anymore, he hated you from the very beginning. Not only because you were considered bad luck, it's because he envied that you were a direct descendant of such a powerful God, he couldn't even handle Jason's arrival, yours was just the last straw for him. He opposes your opinions in front of the whole senate + prevents you from getting elected as Centurion + attempts to prevent you from going on quests, bc he can't handle someone else taking the glory.

• He was also the reason you were put into the unpopular twelfth legion. The underdog legion. But Jason? That sweetheart made it worth being in the twelfth legion so you weren't complaining tbh.

• honestly? Octavian and you are famous in camp for your bickering though lol it's just always a back and forth between you and him, such burning rivalry and enmity. You LOVED roasting him and you were fucking great at it too. He deserved that for making you go though hell. You'd laugh like a maniac when he trips and he smirks when has the upper hand against you in senate discussions.

• Reyna is the only reason you both didn't beat eachother up at this point tbh

• once, Reyna came running up to you all panicky because Octavian went missing from camp. In response, you beamed and told her that you'd get the balloons ready in the dining hall for a grand celebration. Jason would burst out laughing lol.

• you'd steal his teddy bears and give them to younger campers, asking them to hide it from octavian. So the younger campers absolutely adore you, unlike the older ones.

• you are also quite the rebel in camp, JUST like Octavian predicted you would be, when you first came to camp. It was actually written in his auguries that the new child of Neptune arrival would be always shafting the rules, since the sea can't be controlled. It's in a nature for a Neptune child to walk their own pace (lol have you seen Percy??) That gave another reason for him to hate you.

• Even some of the lares in CJ would call you an abnormal roman bc you never acted like one. You were wild and temperamental.

This rule breaking tendency you had did earn you lots of punishments that included scrubbing the whole camp with a toothbrush. But it was worth it for you. Camp Jupiter sucked. And you were already in trouble, so what's a little more, right?

• you'd sneak out at night to explore New Rome, because again, the Romans had this weird bedtime curfew like. they have rules for every. Fucking. Thing. It pissed you off so bad. They wouldn't even let you explore the city at night? They were seriously wasting the beauty of the city, You'd definitely rope Jason in to break the rules with you. Like don't be such a goody two shoes smh. I feel like that's what attracted him to you in the first place. He's a goody goody boy with such a boring life, youd just make it interesting for him.

• besides, sneaking out is SO much easier when you can fly. So Jason is your personal airplane. The Jason Grace airlines.

• okay so after all your hardwork in the legion, you'd finally get elected to Centurion, after you successfully finished a quest to retrieve a lost Roman artifact, which was formerly Jason's position and he would become a co praetor with Reyna. But you were still very much disrespected in camp tbh, it just became an internalised thing for everyone to hate you at this point, Octavian was also great at putting your reputation under dirt, but you didn't really care anymore.

• now here comes the catch, Jason and you were sort of in a half-pining half-relationship situation, Before that jerk goes missing. because neither of you knew how to confess, and camp was SO strict when it came to relationships for some reason?? Like even dating has to be lowkey.

• you and Jason are totally the grumpy x sunshine trope lol except you're the grumpy, snippy and batshit one and jason is calm, levelheaded and optimistic one.

Perfect balance. Gosh your dynamic would be so cute :(

• you'd just be grumpily stomping around while jason stalks behind you, laughing lightly. You're super short compared to him aswell, so yeah it makes it funnier.

• You were in charge of welcoming Hazel to camp, since Jason and Reyna had some serious meeting stuff about the new prophecy Octavian told them about.

• poor hazel would be scared to death while meeting you, not just bc it's you, it's bc she just came back from the dead, so this is all rlly new for her.

• That's where you met him. Nico di Angelo. You'd bond over your shared mistreatment in camp. So you became homies w him fairly quickly. He saw you as this cool big sister he could have happy meals with talking abt life.

• you would be a little curious when he keeps disappearing off to somewhere tho, you knew he was lying about where he came from.

Okay part 1 of this is done, this was so long lol, part 2 would drop later, that's where you and Percy meet and stuff.

Update: part two is out! https://www.tumblr.com/somewhereinhogsmeade/746489087922520064/daughter-of-neptune-headcanons-list-part-two?source=share

[noonaishere]

Music of the Heart [J.YH] - eighty-eight | being kind is punk

Owing to some cola stains in the carpeting - and the carpet color being a color that was no longer used in the offices - the building manager, upon inspecting the room that would become your studio, decided that it was the rare moment in a building manager’s career where he would be able to change a rooms decor without having to inconvenience the person using it by kicking them out for a while. You didn’t mind, the idea of soda sitting in the rug for a while made you worried there might be bugs in or under the carpet, and since the other members of Crom3r were dealing with the emotional residue of their ex-producer, you didn’t want to deal with physical aspects, in the sense of suddenly finding pests in your private studio years down the line. As it was, you and Yujin were beginning your bass lessons in a lesson room you were given use of, until your studio was ready.

Yujin took out her bass and plugged it in and got comfortable in her seat. She watched you as you, bass in your lap, flipped through what you had prepared.

“Ooooookay. Did you go over what I gave you?”

“Oh!” She leaned over and took the folder you gave her out of her backpack. In the time between when you gave it to her, and her showing up for her first lesson now, she had covered it in stickers.

As she opened it to look for something, you read one outloud, red text over a picture of Karl Marx:

“‘Dude, I fucking warned you, I fucking told you bro.’”

“Oh!” She said, realizing what you were reading. “I’m sorry--”

You laughed. “Don’t be. The man was right.”

She laughed awkwardly. “It’s such bullshit that he was right so long ago, and we’re still doing shit he critiqued… or worse.”

“You’re right about that.” You pointed to another sticker, “I also like the Lisa Frank dolphin next to the classic ‘Unionize’ fish poster.”

She looked at it and laughed. “I was going for a theme.”

You smiled. “I like it.”

She nodded awkwardly. “So… I went over the self-test,” she fished it out of the folder.

“How’d you do?”

“Um… I mean, I haven’t been playing that long, so I didn’t get very far.”

You took it from her and looked at her notes: what had been easy, what had been difficult, and the blank expanse of the second half denoting what she didn’t even bother trying at all.

“I’m sorry.”

You looked at her. Her brows were furrowed together in worriment, maybe she felt she had failed you or failed herself before she even got a chance to start. You smiled a small smile. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Wha-- isn’t it bad that I couldn’t finish it all?”

“Not at all. This was just to let me know what level we were starting at. I never thought you were a prodigy, and even if you were, I’d still have to know so I would know what to teach you.”

She thought for a moment and nodded.

“Okay? This was just for me to know where to start. That’s all it is.”

She nodded again. “Okay.”

“Okay? I’m not mean, I promise.”

She laughed softly.

“I had a really mean violin teacher when I was a kid, and I can promise you: I’ll never treat you the way they treated me, okay?”

Her eyes widened. “How mean were they?”

“Hmm…” How much did you want to explain? “He made me practice scales - at increasing speeds - until my fingers bled. And he made me practice bowing until I had to have an ice pack on my wrist, because the nerves were inflamed.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, he was a mean guy.”

“Why didn’t your mom do something about it?”

“Well…” you weren’t sure how much to say without starting a huge conversation. “She didn’t see a problem with it.”

She gasped.

You raised your eyebrows in shock.

“That’s not punk rock.”

You laughed loudly. “I don’t think they were trying to be punk rock.”

“Being mean isn’t punk. Being kind is. Look--” she searched her folder for a moment for a white on black sticker that said ‘Being kind is punk’. “See?”

You chuckled. “Well I definitely agree with that. But, he and my mom were old farts, so they weren’t too concerned with being punk. Or kind.”

She frowned.

“But we don’t have to worry about them anymore. I haven’t seen them in years.”

“Good. They shouldn’t be known, if they treated you like that.”

You laughed. She was very decided for someone so young. It was like looking into a mirror and seeing your younger self, but if that younger self was allowed to be who she was, instead of having to hide. You shook off the feeling; you were supposed to be teaching bass, not getting emotional.

“So, I have something new for you,” you handed her a paper. It was a list of songs you’d be teaching her, along with the techniques that went with being able to play them:

Songs:

--Simple Money - Pink Floyd Back in Black - AC/DC Feel Good Inc - Gorillaz Funkenstein - Parliament Low Rider - War Good Times - Chic Give It Away - Red Hot Chili Peppers

--Medium Come As You Are - Nirvana My Sharona - The Knack Lust for Life - Iggy Pop Can’t Stop - Red Hot Chili Peppers Love Will Tear Us Apart - Joy Division I Want You Back - Jackson 5

--Complex Giant Steps - John Coltrane Roundabout - Yes Hysteria - Muse Wynona's Big Brown Beaver - Primus Killing in the Name Of - Rage Against the Machine Portrait Of Tracy - Jaco Pastorius Playing God - Polyphia G.O.A.T. - Polyphia Hemispheres - Rush YYZ - Rush Schism - Tool 46+2 - Tool

--Slap Bass Fun Zone! Alright - Jamiroquai Higher Ground - Red Hot Chili Peppers Earthquake - Graham Central Station Get on The Floor - Michael Jackson Guerrilla Radio - Rage Against the Machine Aeroplane - Red Hot Chili Peppers Emergency on Planet Earth - Jamiroquai

--Holy Blisters, Batman! Mr Pink - Level 42 Come on My Selector - Squarepusher

--Boy, Do I Love Practicing! Classical Thump - Victor Wooten

Her eyes went wide. “I… have to learn… all of these?”

You raised a brow at her. “Yes, right now.”

“What?”

You laughed. “Obviously not right now. This is for however long it takes for you to learn each song. We’ll start with one, and when you can play it correctly - and confidently - we’ll go onto the next one.”

“Oh…” she stared at the list.

“If there’s songs you like and really want to learn, we can add them too. These are just songs I think are good to learn to help you become a good bass player.”

She nodded, eyes still on the list. You took her silence as meaning you could keep talking.

“So I tried to organize them into easy, medium and hard, but really it’s more a scale of simple to complex? Like the techniques don’t change, but the bassist is using more techniques together or doing them faster or going from one to the other faster, and that makes it a little harder to play.”

“…Why does it say ‘Slap Bass Fun Zone!’?”

You laughed. “Because a lot of people like slap bass, ‘cause, you know, it makes da funny noises. So I added a bunch of songs that were good for practicing it.”

She nodded.

You let her look at the list some more. Did she know all the songs? Was she confused? Should you ask?

“‘Holy Blisters, Batman!’?” She asked.

“Those are really fast slap bass songs. And ‘Classical Thump’, the only song in its category, is a practice song that Victor Wooten wrote and later recorded for an album. It gets complex but we can take it slow.”

She nodded. “Why is there a Michael Jackson song?”

“His bassist, Lewis Johnson, was nicknamed Thunder Thumbs: absolute madman. You should look up concert footage of him when you get a chance.”

She nodded again. “Higher Ground? Isn’t that a Stevie Wonder song?”

You nodded. “Good eye. You're more than welcome to listen to the original, but the Red Hot Chili Pepper cover is a really good instance of slap bass because their bassist, Flea, puts a lot of juice into it. A lot of zest. A lot of… pizazz-- why are you looking at me like that?”

She looked from you to the list quietly. “Do you really listen to all of these groups?”

“Yeah, why?”

“You listen to so many things. I want to be like that.”

You felt like you were going to cry. Other people rarely complimented your wide musical tastes, and whenever someone did, it always made you a bit emotional. Even if you didn’t show it.

“Well, you know,” you started. “Just look for new things all the time, and you, too, can have a music player with a terabyte microSD in it that’s half full.”

She looked up from the list in shock. “Wha-- literally? Half full?”

“Yep.”

“You have that much music?”

“Mhm. Most of them are FLAC files so, you know, bigger than MP3s.”

“Yeah, but they sound so much better.”

You smiled and nodded. “It’s definitely worth sacrificing the space for.”

“Wow… that’s my new goal. I also want to be a person who listens to that much music.”

You laughed. “Let’s start with these songs and you can listen to their other songs, and bring me whichever ones you want to learn.”

She nodded emphatically. “How long do I have to learn each one?”

“How long? What do you mean?”

“I only have so long to learn them, right?”

You looked at her, confused. “Who told you that?”

“Well… we have to learn everything super fast, don’t we? Or they won’t let us debut.”

“Wha-- who said that?”

“Theo’s friend at another company.”

“Oh… at another company.” You nodded.

She looked at you, confused.

“Yujin, Wonderland won’t force you to debut if you aren’t all ready for it.”

“Oh… really?”

“Of course. At the very least, if we debuted you and you hadn’t practiced enough, *we’d* look bad, but I’m sure the CEO doesn’t want to put you all on a stage if he doesn’t think you’re ready for it yet.”

She nodded. “We met him when we signed our contracts.”

“What’d you think?”

“He was nice.”

“He helped me make your lesson plan.”

“Really?”

“Mhm. And if he can take that much care with making sure you’re learning what you need to learn, I don’t think he’ll force ONiiX to debut when you’re not ready. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Now… What you really want is to be able to play these correctly and in time, and it’s not weird if you want to practice a particular part over and over.”

“Do people do that?”

Your eyebrows ticked up in concern. “What do you mean?”

“Do people practice a part of a song a lot?”

You looked at her for a second, a small smile snaking across your lips as you tried to suppress a laugh. “Um… Yujin, what do you do when you practice?”

She shrugged. “I listen to a song and try to play it.”

“You play it by ear?”

“Yes?”

You nodded.

“Is that bad?”

“No, if you’re playing the song right then it means that your ability to detect pitch is good.”

“I… it doesn’t always sound good though. When I play”

You nodded. “Why don’t you play me a song you feel you know well, and we’ll see.”

She looked at the list. “Um, I know this one,” she pointed to the list.

“Back in Black?”

“Yeah. My dad likes it.”

“Okay,” you took the paper from her and put it on the table. “Go ahead and play it, and I’ll see what you mean.”

The song itself, if it had been played completely correctly and in time, was a little over four minutes. It took more than that for Yujin to play it as it was riddled with mistakes and her rhythm was a little all over the place. Part of the reason for that was, when she’d make a mistake, she’d become frustrated, yell at herself under her breath, and then trip over herself as she tried to fix it.

You watched, keeping your expression neutral, so she wouldn’t react to you and further become frustrated.

When it was over, she looked at you. “...Yeah.”

You nodded.

“We’re…” she whispered, “we’re going to be able to debut, right? Bibi is a really good singer, and Soul is an expert drummer, and Theo is such a good guitarist… I don’t want to disappoint them if I can’t keep up…”

You smiled softly. “You’re going to debut.”

Her brows furrowed, creasing over the bridge of her nose; she didn’t believe you.

“For one thing, you have me on your side. And you heard me play, so…”

“I guess… Am I really bad?”

You sighed. “You’re not terrible… you’re just a beginner.”

She frowned.

“And I have to say, for someone who’s just starting out to already have a band and a record label?” You whistled long. “Not bad. I wish I could have done that at your age.”

Her frown subsided a little. “What were you doing at my age?”

You guessed you could tell her. “Hiding my bass at a friend’s house and only practicing on the weekends because my tyrant mother wanted me to play violin instead.”

Her eyes widened in shock. “You’re lying.”

You laughed. “I wish I was.”

She thought for a moment. “Your mom sucks. Ah--!”

You laughed loudly.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”

“You shouldn’t be, you’re right.”

“My mom says I sometimes talk without thinking. It gets me into trouble sometimes.”

“Well, you’re not in trouble now because you’re totally right. She does suck, that’s why I don’t talk to her anymore.”

She nodded.

“But!” You clapped your hands together. “You’re not me. You don’t have to teach yourself secretly: you have a really cool bass teacher who can get your skills to where you need them to be. Okay?”

She nodded, a little more hopeful.

“So, one of the first things you need to learn is how to practice.”

“How?”

“Mhm. So there’s this guy, he’s a guitarist, but if you want to see a good representation of someone practicing by themself, you can look up Tim Henson from Polyphia - I put a couple of their songs on there - he streams his practice sessions sometimes and you can see how he goes about thinking about what he wants to practice, how he treats himself; he doesn’t get mad, he just does the part again until he finally gets it.”

She took a pen out of her backpack and wrote his name down on the song list. “Just-- over and over?”

“Yep. Breaking it down into smaller parts and working on it until he has it, maybe he tries it slower to figure it out, but then he puts the pieces together and plays it at full speed, and what do you know? Now he can play it.”

She nodded.

“‘Start slow, play it well, then get faster.’ Mark King who has a song in the ‘Holy Blisters, Batman!’ section of the paper said that. Paraphrased.”

“Ugh… I don’t want to play slow though. I hate slow songs.”

You laughed. “Did you come into the world knowing how to use chopsticks and a spoon? Or did you eat with your hands first and learn the other stuff later?”

She opened her mouth to protest but thought better of it. “I guess you’re right.”

You smiled. You remember being like that, but at least you didn’t have to respond like how your teacher did.

“Slow doesn’t mean boring, though. But the only way to play something really well when it’s fast, is to play it extremely well when it’s slow. You get the pacing of the notes down right when you play it slow, and then you can gradually speed up until you play it at full speed.”

She nodded.

“I’ll get you a metronome from the company and make you some drills so you can get better at rhythm too. As the bassist, rhythm is the thing that you and the drummer do and you have to do it well.”

“I want to do solos sometimes though.”

“And you will, but your rhythm needs to be on point for the rest of the song because, when you pick up the bass, that’s the job you give yourself.”

You tilted your head as you looked at her. She was doing a lot of nodding and quiet contemplation.

“So:” You said with a smile.

She looked up.

“Let’s go over that song again, and I’ll teach it to you.”

  previous | main cast | masterlist | next

a/n: Do we like Yujin? Do you know what her name is from? 😏

Send an ask or leave a comment if you want to be added to the tag list! 🎵 Any comments, reblogs, or asks are appreciated! I love talking with you guys and seeing what you’re saying about the chapters, it keeps me going 🥰

@luvvvx • @iamthehotdemon • @hrts4hanniehae • @rachs-words • @stayatinykatsy • @anythingrelatingtojinyoung​

[a-sad-mage]

TOXZON MY BELOVED

Toxzon, Dr, Tytus Octavius Xander's was royally screwed over by both N-Tek, THI and basically everyone in his life.

[Click for full rant]

The man literally has a mental illness(im not even going to try and figure out what it is, because there are many possibilities). What he needed was support from both his jobs and the people around him, both past and present.

I mean you would think a military base like N-Tek would invest in a psychologist for its operatives to talk to, and THI, after Molly took over, would have encouraged and payed it's employees to seek therapy after what happened with Naught and Dredd.

Because honestly, if I found out my boss was an evil android, and worked for an even more evil guy that lived in the roof, and all the tech that was made was to be used as a siphon to turn people into a power source for the super villain guy in the roof who is effectively immortal(a rant for another day) I would need so much counseling, because WTF I was technically apart of harming so many people!

Also, I blame Molly for Xander's becoming Toxzon.

Like girl, the man was used to not being supervised because of how Naught and Dredd were running the company. Instead of firing the clearly mentally ill man that you yourself acknowledged was talking to a plastic fish, put him on unpayed suspension, have him supervised by someone you trust like an N-Tek scientist. Tell him he needs to seek professional help so he can keep his job.

Not publicly humiliate him by having security drag him out of your office(and the building) as your son and his friends walk in.

And at the very least, if you did have to fire Xander's, have a conversation that lasts more than five minutes about it, even if that means rescheduling with Max and his friends.

Because yeah, he did kinda make a tentacle monster that almost killed and traumatized an intern.

Also, how the hell did Molly not know about the huge lab under the building with toxic waste?

I'm just-

I'm not saying Molly deserved what happened to her when Toxzon infected and mutated her in 'The Secret Admirer', but like it could have been avoided.

On top of that, Fishy is clearly the evil one here. That bow tie, top hat wearing, uneven eyed, plastic fish is straight up the inner most, and quit frankly most toxic thoughts and traits of Xander's personified.

In 'Gone Fishin' Toxzon pollutes the whole damn ocean just to get Fishy back, and the moment he does, and sucked up all the contamination, it's Fishy that's like 'use that goop to kill some mofos', the thought did not cross his mind till Fishy was back with him.

I am willing to bet Fishy is the reason why he keeps making such destructive choices.

Now I'm not going to sit here and make a diagnosis, I'm not a doctor, but from everything I understand, my beloved mad scientist/eco-terrorist needs counseling, and needed it from a young age, but never got it.

According to the MaxSteel(2013) section of the FandomWiki, he is canonically 33 years old, and if we're assuming the show takes place is 2012 as according to the date of issue on Max’s drivers licens, Toxzon was born in around the 1980's. And back then, mental health wasn't taken seriously. And because Xander's was a bright kid, since you know the guys a freaking genius, it was most likely overlooked as a 'smart kid' thing. See Seldon from BBT & YS.

He was failed, by pretty much everyone in his life.

And much like the Decepticons from Transformers, Dr. Tytus Octavius Xander's became the villain people saw him as and not the misunderstood man that just needed professional help and a friend.

And I will forever defend him.

Jason Naught, Miles Dredd, and Troy Winter's can all kick rocks because they are genuinely bad people who take pleasure is hurting others and taking advantage of people.

Two of these three actually sided with an alien race that was going to consume the earth killing every living being on it and the other committed identity theft, and that's not a joke.

{@treeships, because you so kindly listened}

[agentnico]

Trap (2024) review

M. Night Shyamalan seems like a nice dad.

Plot: In M. Night Shyamalan's latest outing, everyone in a large city is in a frenzy. Why? That's because they're up and ready to watch a concert performed by famous pop star Lady Raven. Two of her fans, a man named Cooper and his daughter Riley, attend the concert with high spirits, but things slowly begin to change their tune. Amongst the screams of adoration and sounds of applause, the concert itself has a hidden identity: a front to fish out an infamous serial killer known as The Butcher. With security cameras rigged, armies of policemen with weapons at the ready, and police vehicles surrounding the venue, will anyone survive their concert experience or is there more to The Butcher than meets the eye?

I bloody love M. Night Shyamalan! As a director that is, not as a person as I’ve never met the guy. He could be a real stuck snob for all I know. But as a creative voice in the movie industry I absolutely adore him, as this is someone who to this day has not let the Hollywood machine change or mould him and has stayed true to himself and his style of art form. Granted he does make a lot of crap, from the fascinating beach-that-turns-you-old concept stuck in a goofy and stupidly executed Old to The Happening where he somehow managed to make a tree be the ominous bad guy. And even then I cannot hate the guy as he’s evidently so batshit crazy that I have no choice but to love it. As even at his worst he still manages to come with such unique and outrageous concepts, and of course is also well known for his ridiculous third act plot twists, so even his worst film can still offer some level of entertainment. Except for After Earth. F*** that movie and also f*** Jaeden Smith ya tosser!! Mind you, I’ve never seen After Earth.

Trap is so silly. Like on every level, from each scene featuring a thousands plot-holes, characters talking like unreal people as if they are in some alien reality, random crap occurring for the sake of it…. It’s all absolutely absurd. Josh Hartnett is the glue that holds it all together, as his unhinged performance of a psychopath trying his best to act like a happy fun loving guy only to seem even more like a serial killer was truly hilarious. Also, I found myself kind of rooting for the serial killer? Like what kind of weird Dexter crap is this, Shyamalamadingdong?? I’ve been Stockholm syndromed into liking the bad guy! But anyway, Hartnett is a hoot and honestly he needs to be in more films! Saleka as the pop singer is alright. Her songs aren’t that great nor is her acting, though I do find it super endearing that Shyamalan made this entire film just to give his daughter her big ‘Eras Tour’ concert moment break and to boost her music career. What a sweet papa.

This movie very much is reliant on how willing you are to suspend your sense of disbelief, and on what level are you able to stick with Shyamalan’s shenanigans. This isn’t a particularly good movie, nor is it a bad one, but it’s extremely entertaining from beginning to end, even if the ending does get a little too off the rails. That being said one aspect that was actually phenomenal was the cinematography by Sayombhu Mukdeeprom, who’s a frequent collaborator of Luca Guadagnino’s. There are so many ludicrously delicious frames here, and I admired how each conversation was shot, as tight and intimate as possible while capturing every foolish and panic-induced character response.

Also shout out to Kid Cudi who rocks up for less than 5 minutes of screen time to drop the mic, eye-fuck Josh Hartnett for no other reason other than it’s Josh Hartnett and then drop the best line of the whole damn movie - “I specifically said I wanted honeysuckle sour kombucha, bitch!!”

Overall score: 6/10

[kay9leo]

At First Glance...Part XII

Chapter 11 <<<||| Chapter 12 ||| >>> Chapter 13

...At Reality

“A sarcophagus. This must be Marmaduke.” MC said as they found the tomb of said Dale member and the creator of William Dale’s beet feet curse. MC frowned as she got close to the open sarcophagus. “I can’t believe that this is the tomb that cursed Dale. Or how much envy Granum –that’s this guy’s older brother and the eldest in their family– had that he would be willing to curse his own family. Even their decedents!” MC tsked as she wingardium leviosa-ed the stone top to close the sarcophagus.

“I’m still not over how William has beets for feet.” Sebastian chuckled before MC elbowed him.

“Owe! What was that for!” He grumbled as he glared at his best friend as he thought, While I may be in love with you, I definitely didn’t deserve that elbow.

“It might be funny, but I rather not make fun while we still have an active curse going.” She narrowed her eyes before shoving something into his hands. “Now here, place this crest on top of the sarcophagus.

“Why me and not you? Are you trying to not get cursed yourself?” He teased with smirk, partly because he felt honored that MC would bestow the honor of breaking a curse to him and partly because he couldn’t help himself.

There was something in how feeling her hands –even if just a moment when she handed the Dale family crest to him– made his insides jitter and hands sweaty. It was as if realizing his feelings for her was a curse in itself – one that made him more self-conscious in everything that he did now in relation to her.

“No. It’s because I know you’ll do the job right.” She paused before frowning as she crossed her arms and looked at her boots. “That and my shorter height will make it a bit more difficult for me to place it properly without out having to climb up onto the sarcophagus.” She mumbled before looking at him with a rather unusual bashfulness in her eyes. “So, will you, do it? For me?”

Sebastian mouth open and closed, as if he was a fish breathing underwater before nodding.

“As you wish Ms. Troll-slayer.” He bowed as if greeting a deity. His personal deity.

“Pfff, don’t put me on a pedestal Sebastian.” MC waved her hand, as if knocking away the very thought. She crossed her arms as she rolled her eyes. “I couldn’t have taken any of those the three down without you.” She stated with a smile as her eyes met his.

“Nonsense. Despite being taken down, I saw how you finished that fight with the first troll we dealt with in Hogsmeade.” He frowned as he stared back. “You also took down the second troll by yourself signal handedly. And this third troll we just faced, you let me have the finishing shot! You don’t need me. Never did.” He stated, feeling his own words spit out his mouth, leaving bitterness on his tongue now that he stopped to think about their earlier victory, his insecurities and her own words she said last night taking hold of his mind.

“Honestly, I know did more harm than good at times. What good was I in that first fight when it knocked me out? Or the second fight? That was all you. I felt like this was the first time I was more of a help than a hindrance like the other times.” He scowled as he stared down at the Dale family crest.

It was even nicer than his own family crest; held more details and color despite its old age. The Sallow crest was simpler with a litera–

“I don’t appreciate you talking about my partner like that.” MC spat, voice sharp and harsh, like nails on a chalkboard.

“What?” He whipped his head up to see MC’s eyes narrowed before she slowly started marching towards him. Once she was in arm distance, she pulled him down with his tie, so they were meeting eye-to-eye.

He never seen her so angry like that before.

“You heard me Sallow. Don’t talk shite about my partner.” She huffed. “You’re talking about the same guy who decided to stand by my side when a troll came after me despite barely knowing me. The same one who leapt in front of me to defend against Rockwood and Harlow despite knowing how dangerous that was or how the odds were against him. The same guy who helped me to sneak into the Restricted Section, took the fall for me, joins me in my insane-at-times quests despite his hesitance, fear or abhorrence for some of the things we have to do.”

She snorted like a bull, pausing to take another breath before speaking once more.

“My partner,” She said as she poked his chest, “has endlessly helped me to try and understand my unusual magic. I know we both had our rough moments, and I know a rather large portion of it is due to his wishes to save his sister, but when I needed him the most, he always has my back.” MC stated, teeth bare like a dog giving its last warning before it would bite.

“I was scared. Fucking scared.” She swallowed before she took in a deep breath. “Yet every time I look back, he is there. Sebastian has my back. That’s why I could take those first two trolls down. That’s why my ancient magic skill had continued to improve. It’s why the very thought of him cheering me on in Crossed Wands is enough to push me to survive and beat those stupid keeper trials when he isn’t around. I’m new to this world. You’re right. I am ignorant.”

He flinched, but MC continued as if she didn’t notice it.

“It’s true. I am ignorant to the magical world. I’ve only been here a couple of months compared to your lifetime of fifteen. There is so much that I don’t know.” She shook her head with a sad smile. “But regardless of everything, of all the danger I get myself into, some unintentional, some willing, Sebastian always has my back. It’s true that I don’t need you. We both saw it in that month break in our friendship.” MC frowned. “I don’t need you. I want you. You’re one of the most important people in my life.”

She sighed as she released his tie and took a step back, neither taking their eyes away from each other.

“I mean it when I said it. Don’t talk shite about my partner.” She glared at him. “Sebastian Sallow is more than whatever image you’re trying to give off. More than what his Uncle Solomon thinks of him. More than what even he thinks of himself. That’s why I’m giving him the honor of breaking someone else’s curse.” She said as she held his hands between hers. “Because I want him to know that we can do it. That we are more than the sum of our parts. That we are a team. We got each other’s back. Don’t think that you’re all alone in this world. We got each other.” She stated as she shook their hands before stepping back.

“Now go let my best friend place the crest back into its slot. That should reverse the curse. Hopefully.” She stated with a smile.

Sebastian opened and closed his mouth like a fish before he nodded with a smile.

If there were tears in his eyes, surely MC would understand why with how dusty the tomb was as he placed the Dale Crest back into its home.

“There.” His voice cracked as he looked at her. MC gave him a grateful beaming smile. It was enough to make his stomach do backflips as his heart pounded with joy just seeing that smile towards him.

For him.

…

“Samantha will be glad to hear that the crest has been returned. I certainly hope it reverses the curse.” Sebastian smiled at her as they returned to the Dale tomb entrance.

Highwing was lightly dosing off, laying down at the top of the stairwell. At least she was until MC whistled. The white hippogriff stood up and stretched like a cat with a yawn before walking out into the open air with the two Hogwarts students behind her.

Once outside, Highwing bent down for easier access for MC to jump on. Without words, Sebastian motioned her to stop before he jumped on. Once he was seated, he offered her his hand.

MC took it and jumped up as he pulled her onto Highwing’s back.

With another whistle from MC, the Hippogriff flew off with Sebastian holding tight to MC’s waist as they flew into the afternoon sunny skies with the wind blowing on their faces and the sun kissing their skin as they flew home.

…

Actually, scratch that. They went to Hogsmeade instead.

The two decided to take a quick afternoon detour at the Three Broomsticks for a quick bite to eat.

MC hid Highwing in her nap-sack before they made their way to Hogsmeade village. Very little was said, in part due to hunger but mainly due to the comfortable silence. It was homely really.

Life was blissfully peaceful and content with MC by his side.

Nothing needed to be said with how they knew just from a nudge of the chin, lifted eyebrows and a smile as they both immediately knew where their next stop would be.

They enjoyed listening to others’ banter as they waited for their food in silence and a shared smiled between them. They only really started chatting once there was food in their belly and glasses half-empty as they started talking about anything and everything under the sun.

With each minute he spent with her, the more Sebastian could see himself doing this every night. At every meal. In any moment MC was willing to spend with him.

When the sunbeam landed on her eyes, Sebastian’s breath froze.

I want to marry MC one day. He thought as he watched how the light danced around her. I want to grow old and be with her till the very end of our lives.

At that he froze once more.

Thankfully, the universe had decided to spare him. Not even a minute later after that thought popped into his mind, MC had to leave for a quick bathroom break, leaving him a moment to himself.

It shouldn’t be surprising really…Sebastian thought as he started at his butterbeer. No other girl I’ve met has been that compatible to me like MC is. Or keeps me on my toes. I enjoy her company. And no one else has been there for me like she has…or cared for me that much like she did. We barely knew each other when we first fought that troll the first time around…he thought as he took a sip of the bubbly beverage before gently placing the wooden mug down.

…She was so worried for me and tended to me, just like that! And MC had never thought less of me before…all this time…I’ve thought of her above me with her power and wits…I’ve never thought she would have thought of me as impressive as well… He frowned as he stared into the creamy foam of his drink.

While I may be a great duelist, she far outclasses me…MC defeated me like it was child’s play and knocked me flat on my arse…she doesn’t need me…yet… He thought as he looked up towards the hallway to the restroom where MC went.

“You heard me Sallow. Don’t talk shite about my partner.”

“Sebastian always has my back. It’s true that I don’t need you. We both saw it in that month break in our friendship. I don’t need you. I want you. You’re one of the most important people in my life.”

“Because I want him to know that we can do it. That we are more than the sum of our parts. That we are a team. We got each other’s back. Don’t think that you’re all alone in this world. We got each other.”

Sebastian glanced toward the foggy window, watching how the sun had already started its decent into the underworld while his own pensive reflection stared back at him. Judging him. Questioning his worth. Wondering if he, Sebastian Sallow, could match up to the girl he realized he loved more than just friends.

…we’ve been great partners in Crossed Wands and greater friends outside of it. She’s a fantastic duelist and I certainly met my match when she knocked me down flat on my arse. He snorted with a frown. But what good is being a fantastic duelist if I can’t even take down a troll to protect her? She never needed me. He thought as he glanced down to his butterbeer.

“I don’t need you. I want you. You’re one of the most important people in my life.”

Her voice echoed in his mind as he started back to the window, taking a second look at himself as her voice continued to speak in his mind.

“Sebastian Sallow is more than whatever image you’re trying to give off. More than what his Uncle Solomon thinks of him. More than what even he thinks of himself. That’s why I’m giving him the honor of breaking someone else’s curse.”

“Sebastian always has my back.”

Sebastian sighed before feeling his lips slowly lift as her words continued to echo in his mind.

I’ve had her back when it mattered to her…I know that I’m more than what my uncle thinks of me…more than what most people think of me. And I know she’s not going to leave me when she has her needs fulfilled…she wants me. I’m one of the most important people in her life. Said it herself. He thought as he saw his eyebrows narrowed as he came to a final conclusion with a small smile.

Maybe I do have a chance.

Sebastian nodded to himself, to his mirrored reflection and gave off a charming smile to MC as she returned to the table with a rather nervous smile. A flutter of pixies danced in his stomach.

Alright Sallow, it’s just MC. Take your chance and tell her how you feel.

But before he could, MC’s lips opened and said:

“Hey Sebastian…you can say no if you want, but would you want to go on another quest with–”

“Yes.” He spat with a grin.

“You sure? Don’t you want to know what we are doing?” MC frowned.

“Whatever it is, I’m sure we’ll succeed if we are together.” He grinned as he slammed his hand on the table. “I’m in.”

…

Maybe I should’ve wait for MC to tell me what we were going to do for this quest. He thought as he quietly gulped at the number of giant spiders that suddenly popped out of the ground and started attacking them relentlessly.

Even if the pair of them were great duelist, even this was too much for them. Every time one would be killed, two more would pop out of the ground like some metaphorical hydra.

“They’re even more aggressive than I’d expected.” MC growled as she stepped behind him. He immediately recognized the telltale sign of her ancient magic coming into place as he felt the very air hum with energy and the hair at the back of his neck and arms start to rise as he cast a quick protego! for MC to do her thing.

Thunderbolts stuck down, hitting every single overgrown spider, even the ones just coming out from the ground, paralyzing them enough for Sebastian to get a few confringos, diffindos, and glacius!

He frowned at only hearing his voice as he turned back to MC, who was on all four on the ground.

“MC, what’s wrong?!?” He spat, hoping that she didn’t hear the quiver in his voice as he turned back to continue firing shorts at the stupid arachnids.

“Just…just g-give me a moment…I th-think…I m-might’ve overdone it.” MC panted before she looked up to him, face panting as if she had ran a marathon, blood running down her nose and lips.

“I’ll say! I never seen you drained like that before. I think we should abort the mission this time MC!” He frowned as he glanced back to her before re-focusing his attention to the spiders around them. “Just give me a moment. I should be able to–”

“NO!”

“No!?!” He spat as he glanced back to look at her.

MC was still on the ground, panting before she took in a deep breath in and shakily stood up. When she lifted her head up, Sebastian had to force himself to hold his ground when she looked up to meet his eyes.

Her eyes were completely blue.

Not like before where her iris would change color as she used her magic and at times, even turn her pupils blue.

No.

Her ENTIRE EYES –from the sclera to the pupil– glowed blue like her magic. Like lightening trapped in a glass bottle.

If blue defined her ancient magic, her near-reach to godhood, her red blood that was rolling down her nose, over her lips and down her chin, dropping onto the ground onto her boots was a reminder of her humanity.

“MC, whatever you’re doing, you need to STOP! NOW!” He screamed, heart in his throat. He easily took note of how despite the forceful feel her ancient magic emitted as it greeted his with the gentleness of a rampaging graphorn at first, it soon than cuddled his own magical core it with the softness of a newborn kitten.

It wasn’t enough to calm his nerves despite its magical demands.

This was powerful magic she was releasing.

Too powerful.

Sebastian could still see how she was shaking. Could see her unsteady breaths. Could see how her nose was still bleeding, dripping red blood down her face and onto her boots as if it was rain. It was too much for her physical body to release at once.

God-like magic she might have, but she still abided by mortal rules in the stress she was placing upon her human body by releasing that MUCH magic at once.

Is she going to release all of her magic at once?!?! Sebastian thought with fright seizing him still as the humming sound grew all around him to the point even the giant spiders paused, noticing something was amiss.

It wasn’t uncommon to hear how a person would sacrifice themselves to defend their loved one if push comes to shove when there was no other option left by releasing their magic all at once to the point that their magic would tap into their life source in the center of their magical core for their last stand.

Death would be the only one to greet the user afterwards, seizing them after their honorable death.

It was the main reason why Anne stayed at home, barely practicing magic with how weaken her magical reserves became.

“MC YOU NEED TO STOP! NOW!” Sebastian screamed as terror seized his heart, recognizing the telltale signs of magical drainage.

MC narrowed her eyes and held her arms out. She dropped her wand and held her fingers spread out before she took a deep breath.

Three things immediately happened.

MC threw a powerful protego over him with a flick of her hand.

Another flick later, a score of thunderbolts slammed into the ground, its sounds joined by screaming spiders, all muted by the protego shield bubble.

Then MC fell down a second later after they all went silent.

She landed first on her knees, before falling on her hands and then collapsing completely as her eyes fell shut with a groan.

And yet all the while, her protego shield never let up – the only thing that gave his panicked mind some assurance that YES. MC is still alive.

“MC, drop your shield!” Sebastian yelled as he slammed against the shield bubble around him, hitting it with everything he got within him before deciding to make a body-slam run for it. Before he could even hit the shield with the only two steps the shield bubble gave him for a running start, it vanished.

He ended up tripping, landing on his hands and knees right next to MC.

Who still wasn’t moving save for the rise and fall of her chest.

At least she’s breathing…. Sebastian frowned as he gently rolled her from a prone to supine position.

Her face was covered in blood and dirt.

He took a handkerchief out from his back pocket and placed the tip of his wand against it, muttering aquamenti to moisten the cloth. Once he squeezed out the excess water from it, he placed the moist handkerchief underneath her nose before wiping it down over her lips and down her chin and neck.

“That by far has to be the stupidest thing you have ever done MC.” He softly growled as he removed the last of her blood around her neck and started removing the dirt on her face.

“But it worked.” She mumbled cheerfully

If anyone asked (not that anyone would even know in an empty town filled with dead spiders with only him and MC as the sole human occupants), he didn’t scream and jumped back in fearful surprise.

Sebastian was just excited. That’s all. They were screams of joy at the fact that his friend wasn’t dead!

“Any louder and I’m certain they’ll be able to hear your scream by Hadrian’s Wall.” MC frowned as she slowly sat up, acting as if she didn’t nearly greeted Death like an old friend. Instead, her bright eyes –which was the complete opposite symptom of magical drainage– greeted his with mirth and cheerfulness.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting for my comatose magically drained friend to suddenly speak. Especially not after THAT STUNT YOU PULLED!” Sebastian spat, anger suddenly fueling him as MC leaned back with a frown.

“What the FUCK were you thinking MC! Do you even know what the FUCK you just nearly did?” Sebastain hissed, his own breathing staggering in and out like an aggressive bull.

“Well, from what it seems to me, I just killed a town full of spiders with a magical thunderstorm.” MC stated as she threw her arm out towards the town –now filled with dead spiders. “Not the first time I called down multiple thunderstrikes. I just over did it; that’s all.” She said as she got up and offer him her hand to help him stand up.

He stared at her.

Her eyes were bright. She wasn’t staggering, wasn’t panting or any of the sort that would come with magical drainage. Nor was she unconscious; one of the last stages of extreme magical drainage before death without proper intervention.

“Are you going to take my hand or what?” MC nervously smiled; that same one he saw on her when he realized that she had vaporized a troll way back during their first trip to Hogsmeade.

Sebastian nodded and took it, letting her help him stand up despite the reasonable anger he felt

“Why are you so angry? It’s not like this is the first time I fainted from going all out.” MC said, rolling her eyes as he froze upon realizing what she said. “The fact that it took me two tries is impressive by itself since–”

“Excuse me, by what do you mean you fainted doing this before?” He stated slowly as he felt his own magic shimmering underneath his own skin like the angry buzzing of bees.

MC must’ve noticed it too with the way he felt her own magic responding in kind. But instead of the buzzing anger of bees, her magic greeted his like the gentle caress of sea foam greeting the sandy beaches at low tide.

She frowned when she realized he refused to let his magic be calmed by her own.

“Explain.” He narrowed his eyes.

“I figure I would get some practice in right now before I would have to face another Keeper trial.” MC stated as she released her hold and crossed her arms. “It isn’t the first time I took down a horde of spiders during one of my own solo practices. Nearly fainted as well. Took me a while to master it when dealing with five spiders. They would usually go down after one thunderbolt. I never had to deal with as many spiders as we did here, and I wanted to see as to how far I could push my limits knowing that you’re here. I rather not do that when I’m on my own as I would have no one watching my back in case I overdid it.”

“Well, you did.” Sebastian hissed as he crossed his own arms in response. “Do you know how fucking dangerous that is MC? Pushing your magic to your limit like that? Do you know why Anne isn’t at school practicing magic like the rest of us? Do you know how fucking close you are to greeting Death when you do that?!?”He growled as he got right up into MC’s face, hands on both of her shoulders.

“No, but I survived it before.” MC frowned. “I need to practice doing that – using my ancient magic to take out multiple enemies at once Sebastian. It might be just the thing to keep me alive when I–”

“IT MIGHT JUST BE THE THING THAT KILLS YOU!” Sebastian yelled, throat tight and eyes stinging as he stared at her.

Now he was the one who was trembling.

“Do you understand? You can’t die! You just CAN’T!” He yelled, unable to say the real reason why. Why this girl in front of him, the one who somehow managed to sneak her way into his heart and steal it couldn’t die.

Her death would somehow kill him too. It would take away the little light he had in this world.

Sebastian knew that he was in too deep, knew he was too in love with this girl that her death would leave him no better than an Azkaban prisoner after a dementor’s kiss. He was already becoming a husk with Anne’s absence and his own guilt over how useless he has been towards finding a cure, a treatment even to keep her alive and pain-free! Anne was withering away before his very eyes while he kept on living. His friendship with Ominis had been on rocky waters ever since Anne had been cursed, with his best friend pulling him out of more trouble than he liked to admit.

Sebastian wasn’t living. He was just going through the motions of school, personal hygiene and play, acting as if everything was alright in the light of day. In the shadows of night that slowly started creeping into the shadows of day, he had a one-track mind to not lose the little that he had by researching, looking for something to save Anne.

Then he met her.

And he was literally knocked off from his feet as MC reminded him of what it was like to live. To laugh with your best friend.

To love.

Sebastian swallowed that tightness that was building up in his throat.

“You can’t die MC.” He repeated. “If you push your magical reserves to it limit –to use all the magic that you have, it will pull from your life force until you have nothing left and you. Will. DIE.” He exhaled with a staggered breath, trying to prevent the stinging that was affecting his eyes reach his throat or voice too. “Regular magic, ancient magic, it all has a limit. I can’t lose you. Please promise me that you’ll never do that again. Promise me that you’ll retreat if it comes to that.”

��I-I can’t.” MC stated as she placed her hands on his cheeks. “I can’t Sebastian. The Keeper trails are much worse than this. That’s why I need to master this. To know what’s my limit. You know that I have more power –that my magical reserves goes so much more deeper than your average witch or wizard. I need to master my magic to survive the Keeper Trials solo–”

“Then take me with you.” He stated as he placed his hands over hers, never losing contact with her eyes. He pulled them down, until both of their hands were at his chest as he then placed them over his heart. “Take me. I promise you I got your back. You don’t need to face them alone. I got your back.”

“Sebastian, you might die there!” MC shook her head with narrowed sad eyes. “I nearly did myself and you don’–”

“Take me with you.” He stated.

“You don’t even have ancient magic like I do to surv–”

“Take me with you. I promise to have your back.” He stated once more, never wavering in his stance.

MC sighed, as if the wind was taken from her sails.

“Let…let me think about it.” She said, breaking eye contact first before taking her hands back.

Before Sebastian could even give another argument as to why she should take him, MC hugged him instead.

He hugged her back.

They stood there, in the shadow of their friendship that loomed over them, hugging in silence of all of the things unsaid with this physical comfort as their only current answer.

…

He failed to convince her to abort the mission to look for Mary Portman.

Instead, Sebastian decided that if MC won’t leave this mission, he would have to show her why she should take him with her on her next Keeper Trial.

…

With the directions that Crispin Dunne at The Three Broomsticks gave her, they went into the house that MC was certain belonged to his friend.

“Oh no. This must be Mary. Poor woman.” MC stopped as the two of them stared at the human-sized spider web cocoon it was warped in. Sebastian noticed a sheet of paper, sitting on a table nearby and flipped it over.

H-

I have delivered the spider venom as requested. Prompt payment is now due.

The new cluster of spiderlings in my cellar workshop have almost hatched. I can provide more venom soon – once, of course, I have been compensated for the last delivery.

Mary Portman.

“Is there something wrong? I can feel your magic harshly reacting to that letter.” MC said as he looked at her. Her eyebrows were pulled in together, eyes staring at him in concern.

“Poor woman? Ha! I think you might want to rethink that MC after you read this.” He frowned before glaring at Mary Portman being trapped in her own web of doing.

Literally.

Breeding giant spiders? What was she even thinking!?!

“Shit. If Mary was breeding these things in her cellar – that means there are more underground!” MC hissed as she looked up at him. “I’ll need to destroy every last spider in that cellar if this is to end.”

“I think you mean to say, WE need to destroy every last spider.” He said as MC blinked back at him.

Sebastian sighed.

“I’m coming too you know. You should know that I’ll never abandon you, though I do wish you stop and take a break.” He frowned.

“Nothing a bit of Wigglewend won’t fix.” MC grinned.

“And that cockiness of yours could cost you if you aren’t careful, even if you had some Wigglewends to energize you again.” Sebastian spat before sighing at the unpleased look at MC’s face. “That potion can’t fix everything MC. Resting is important too, you know.”

“I promise you that I’m fine Sebastian. I swear, that if I feel like I can’t move on, we can abort this mission.” She said as she lifted her fisted hand towards him with only the pinky reaching out to him. “I pinky swear.”

“You pinky swear?” He pouted, confused by her action.

“Think of it like a muggle version of an unbreakable vow, only deeper since we only have our words and not magic to trust it by. It what I used to do with my muggle friends as kids whenever we made serious promises to each other.” MC said as she showed him how to do the muggle version of the unbreakable vow with both of her hands, hooking the pinky fingers together before shaking on it.

She then unhooked her pinky fingers before offering her right one to him.

“I swear to you, Sebastian Sallow, that if I feel like that I’m going to faint, we’ll abort the mission and come again another day to complete it.” MC said with bright eyes and a sincere smile.

Sebastian sighed and couldn’t help but smile back as he hooked his own pinkie with hers.

If it reminds you to keep yourself safe, I’ll do all the pinkie promises you offer me MC. He thought as they shook upon her muggle vow, relief filling his mind. His very core really.

“Now let’s find that cellar.” He grinned. “We have some exterminating to do.”

…

“If this was where Mary bred the spiders, they’re not here now.” MC said as she took a few steps forward, wand out, ancient magic emitting strongly enough that his own magic greeted it back like two wolves howling at each other during a hunt.

“If we’re lucky, you might have killed them all already above ground.” He hummed, his own wand at ready as MC took lead.

“I doubt it.” MC sighed as they took a look around at the expanded cellar that Mary Portman made. A look in one of the open rooms had MC sighing once more. “Well, this isn’t a good sign. These spiders have gone somewhere.”

In one of the corners of the room, dirt was shoved aside, as if they had dug towards a deeper level of the underground. Sebastian could only imagine that it must have been after MC’s thunderstorm she called down.

MC shook her head with a frown, mumbling, “There must be a way down there.” She then took off. Sebastian followed not a moment later as they went down another corridor where to his displeasure, MC found another lead.

“A ladder.” He frowned as he stared at the unnatural hole in the ground where the ladder started. “Not sure I want to know where this leads.” He grumbled.

“Incendio.” MC mumbled. Flames jumped from her wand towards the spiderwebs that semi-covered the hole. In an instant, they lit up and dissolved into ash.

“Let me go down and have a look first.” Sebastian said as he squeezed her shoulder, slowly maneuvering himself in front of the ladder.

“What happened to you not wanting to know where it leads? Or even, ladies first MC?” MC joked. She can be light-hearted all that she wanted, but he saw her concern in how her eyebrows narrowed or how tight her smile was.

“Are you questioning my dueling capabilities?” He smirked at her as he started lowering himself onto the ladder, pleased at his ability to distract her to take the lead into danger for once.

“No, but–”

“Then don’t worry about it. I have your back, you have mine?” He grinned, giving her a wink and the good ole’ Sallow charm to calm her nerves, but mainly to prevent her from facing trouble first for once in her life.

“Fine.” She huffed. “Best be ready for whatever’s down there Sebastian.”

“I’ll be fine.” He smiled. “I had your back, you’ll have mine. We’re partners after all. Thick as thieves.” He grinned.

MC paused, blinking at him before a soft smile covered her lips.

“Uña y carne.”

At that he froze.

“What? Since when did you know how to speak another language?” He felt his jaw drop as he dumbfoundedly blinked at her. “What does that even mean?!?”

“I’ve already told you Sallow, I’m not originally from London.” MC grinned. “It literally means nail and flesh in English and means the same thing as that idiom you said. Now come on Sebastian! Time to go down! We have some spiders to kill!”

“As you wish.” Sebastian said with a shake of his head and a smile on his lips as he went down.

It was only when he landed on rock bottom, after telling MC it was safe to come down, did he frown at the new thought that popped into his head.

How much do I really know about MC? He smiled once more as he offered his hand to help her jump down onto the ground. She knows so much about me than I do of her.

“Thank you, Sebastian.” MC said with a smile as she met his eyes. “Ready to go?”

“Always.”

...

Chapter 11 <<<||| Chapter 12 ||| >>> Chapter 13

[seabreeze2022]

2023 Bahama Cruise, Part 15, April 4. Grey’s Bight, Long Island.

From the Rime of the Ancient Mariner:

“Water, water everywhere, nor any drop to drink.”

Monday the 3rd was spent working on the water maker. Spent 3 hours on Facebook with the experts troubleshooting our problem. One guy was in Italy and one was in California. After much checking this, and checking that. It came down to a trick from the dealer in California. “Kink the brine out flow hose, to build up pressure”. Sure I will try anything at this stage. Nancy has already checked flight schedules to Miami to acquire parts.

That fixed the problem! Then we made water for 4 hours. Beautiful anchorage and no one here. Truly without the internet we could not have fixed our problem. We have made approximately 98 gallons of water in a month. That would have been 16 trips to a water faucet with our 6 gallon jug. And that would have been a lot of work.

Sunrise in our anchorage. With our water tanks full the evening sunset even provided a small green flash on the horizon. Not as evident as we normally see. But still a green flash.

Checking with Nancy’s family in Fargo, N.D.. They are about to be hit with up to 25 inches of heavy wet snow. That only makes us appreciate our cruse in the Bahamas that much more.

We were able to pick some wild Tamarinds. Maybe 5 or 6. So many on the tree were either too high to pick, or had holes drilled in them by insects. The hole should have been a clue. Later in the day I noticed a wiggling larvae on the sole of the boat. Then two more in the cockpit. Been here a month and no larvae on the floor. Two hours alter the Tamarinds are in the boat and we have larvae. Humm….

This is a West Indian Chank shell ( Turbinella angulata ) . Nancy found several on the beach, but most were in bad shape.

The locals still sponge some. Here the strings of sheepswool sponges (Hippospongia lachne) dry out near the dinghy dock. These must have been here awhile, because they don’t smell at all.

These are sheepswool sponges below our boat. They are $20 on Amazon. Why not get a couple now.

Nancy takes a filet knife to a sponge below the boat. There are two ways to take a sponge. Either cut it off at the bottom, or use a hand rake to rip it from the bottom. Either way, by leaving a section of the sponge attached to the bottom. It will grow back. Very sustainable aquaculture. The water here is very clear for two reasons. Hard rock ground with no sediment. The sponges filter the water making it clear.

This is what is left on the bottom after Nancy cut the sponge off. It will regrow. This one was 5-6 years old, as determined by its diameter. You should see the small fish showing up for a free meal. The fish are smart, after a while they just followed her around.

Nancy frolicking around the boat. We pulled anchor and sailed north 5 miles to Thompson Bay. There are 8 boats here. For once the monohulls out number the catamarans. One lonely catamaran here. Full moon night!

S/V Sea Breeze, Thompson Bay, Long Island, Bahama.

[countessofravenclaw]

I re-read my childhood favorite book series that rivals DCLA for the chaoticness #1

Moment Strikes, Ricky Rapper

Things that happened in this book:

Risto calls the balcony his office. He apparently does woodcarving

Risto's aunt Rauha thinks that their down stair neighbor owns the street and the building because he has the same last name as what the street is called

She also thinks that wealthy people hide their wealth

She automatically assumes that the guy who she thinks owns the building, Lennart Limberg will kick them and just them out

She is also a telephone interviewer (this book was written in the 90s) She harasses people on the Phone about if they have a vacuum and stuff like that

They start getting anonymous noise complaint letters written in letters cut from newspapers

Rauha offers to stop talking so they won't get evicted

Rauha cuts a hole in the carpet to drive robbers away

Risto drops their home key into a sewer

He fishes it out of there with a stick and gum

Rauha tries to distract Mr. Lindberg who is not their landlord from her losing things by pretending to play hide and seek by herself

Risto's key fishing attacks quite a crowd and ends up fishing a wedding band, a pacifier, and a spoon

Some old lady buys the spoon with 20 or Finland's old currency markka

Rauha thinks that every time Mr. Limberg shows up means that they are getting evicted

Rauha disguises herself as Risto's dad because dads and children were allowed to circus for free

Risto says that she doesn't look like a dad because her legs are not hairy

Rauha thinks all dads carry suitcases

A powerlifter manhandles Rauha on stage and everyone cheers

Risto and "dad" Rauha run into Mr. Linberg and Risto introduces Rauha as his faraway uncle from Canada

The mid-summer Rauha witnesses from the balcony how and woman picks up a gun from a taxi driver and shoos a boy she was with who was naked, with it. Rauha calls the police over this and the gun ends up being a toy

Risto and the boy end up being friends and they go to a picnic with Rauha and the boy's mom

Rauha mishears the last name Himber and thinks they are related to Mr. Limberg

Ruaha thinks that the mysterious letter sender is the boy

Risto and Antero (The boy) "get lost" behind a rock because they were digging for worms

The adult think they are lost and drive around in a police car yelling for the boys with a megaphone

The boys think that the announcements about "two lost people" are about Rauha and Anteros Mom

This leads the police to think there are 4 people lost

The women find the boys and just leave, leaving the police looking for all of them

The police bring in 4 helicopters and the army to look for 4 civilians

Risto takes care of Mr. Limberg's dog and Rauha starts crying because she thinks he has come to evict them

The dog gets kidnapped by the upstairs old lady who has been sending those noise complaints

she hated drums because she once fell out of a trapeze and broke her leg

She gets over her drumming hate just because

on the end of the book they put up a circus at the front of their house

This book definitely was not the first Risto Räppääjä book I read or was read but I have very vivid memories. So much happens in this when the book is only about 100 pages and under 2 hours as an audiobook. This is also the oddest of the bunch and doesn't fully reflect the series as a whole because it was initially written as a stand-alone and shows. A lot of aspects and characters established in this book never come up again in the series. This book also really does show its age, with little but outdated language, and technology, etc. and personal conduct and there are just a couple of things that come across as just a tad bit sexist, even when this book was written by two women. But this was written in the 90s and is for kids aged 5 to 12 and lot of the things that don't make sense are made that way intentionally that's what the appeal of Risto Räpääjä is really is.

But the humor is really why these books have made such an impact on me, and even if Moment Strikes isn't exactly the most-known book in the series, and definitely not up there with the more iconic ones, it still definitely has lot of iconic moments and line that I used to quite daily.

[empirrepostr]

Captain Smooth is talking. make notes.

write that down! write that down!

that's a great idea! wish i thought of that.

nono don't make wishes. Jon is an evil genie.

he can give me a haircut.

we have squidly diddly for that. emphasis on the diddly.

ned flanders.

i diddle your.

he was neighbor. now i'll never be made into a fancy pie.

oi oi i wrned you fiend.

strawberry lore!

guy got lion king'd.

and it was all the emotional support donut's fault.

nah fam. that's an egg.

can many various people stop using the wod egg for different things.

wood egg.

rock warbler egg.

she was a bad egg.

don't touch that squirrel's nuts.

that's how you get arrested for environmentalism.

wel there goes salmon. tht was a fish i liked.

curse you alabama land development.

they only need the land because of overpopulation. i wonder why.

the forbidden bow chika wow wow.

speaking of which where is chika?

at the pizza place.

gone extinct.

at the pizza place.

Nicholas Cage was there and then free bird started playing...

what did they put in the spinach?

antimone mostly.

mercury poisoning.

if it's not the war itself tryna kill you, it's the corpos.

i'm in ukraine rn and the irony is pallateable.

the ukraine?

what are you british all of a sudden?

i literally can't search uk in twitch because ukraine comes up.

imagine britain being more obscure than the middle east.

this part of this dimesion i agree with.

it's only fair. britain had the ball for way too long.

britain needs to learn to share their toys. i'm a brit so i can say that.

what is this a MFN broadcast?

needs more max headroom.

yeah we are big brain.

isn't that a sign of downs syndrome?

that explains the incredibles. oh cmon why was he named that hmm?

he actually has downs syndrome facial features by the way.

they like to roleplay don't they. that explains a lot.

you killed him you monsters.

think about it. he really didn't deserve to die.

you know there was crime goin on with no-one to fix it.

what is syndrome but the e1 kickass of the disney universe?

disney has some questionable morals. the guy and the company.

have you seen the remakes? mulan straight up supports racism.

that's not a joke or misinterpretation. i've seen the movie.

and now my mind is racing over the little mermaid.

that's normal. oh yu didn't mean like that lol.

she's 16! doofenschmirtz'es your stupid ass.

she's underage in canon. she was 12 in the book.

12?!

hey serena are you 12?

i mean she is kinda short.

she's an adult and oh boy will she tell you so.

with the old lady power from hussle.

we're gonna need a bellend. plenty here.

that was a joke about tiat. not being rude.

hey rex they want serena to kiss and whisper sweet nothings.

my speedley spooch!

now now. verison won't let us talk about cones.

we nee to stop tumming right here then.

i read that wrong and so do you.

do they also give out candies at te front desk?

mods! not you admin.

knucklevan.

knuckleswap.

knucklestop.

petscop.

circumference.

why hello simone, how are you?

duck says you're an idiot.

annie?

are you okay?

are you okay?

skeve!

meatballs!

i think we lost chat's braincells.

knuckletop.

oh that's... that's very nsfw. but at least they aged them up first.

it's zero.

boss music starts.

we need Jon. he beat them with no perks.

Tummy!

i heard "boss" music.

jirati?

freaking rayman reggie sump.

call him "Dick" because that is his name.

Rick?

that movie is underrated for all the wrong reasons.

Mary collects his shoes.

and we're back to CBTO.

stop using that abbreviation!

knuckle sandwich.

there it is. the best joke in chat.

i'll do you better. who ordered beef?

what a typo.

teef?

starfish on the fanny.

will everyone stop saying that.

we can say it how we like. it's sfw.

so on stack...

help me! doctor!

doctor who? he don't touch guns.

who ordered beef. appie appears.

i didn't order Jon on my pizza.

one of these days i'll get him to stay over after his shift.

you have seen too much internet.

cah.

it's the wurst.

popcornboy's back again.

fetch me the butter.

a daycare to make Aval0nX cry.

we raise them right in this here town.

begone Albert Fish.

Nemo, this is the one acception.

the other day i was called a finecone.

quick, hide from verison!

where's my frycook.

but it was a fake.

st- you know the rst.

Reeeeex!

i believe that he loves balls

[project1939]

200 Films of 1952

Film number 167: Radar Men from the Moon

Release date: January 9th, 1952 

Studio: Republic 

Genre: sci-fi serial 

Director: Fred C. Brannon 

Producer: Franklin Adreon 

Actors: George Wallace, Aline Towne, Roy Barcroft 

Plot Summary: Commando Cody invents amazing things like atomic powered jetpacks and a rocket ship that can go to the Moon. When mysterious atomic explosions start happening all over the Earth, Cody believes it is the start of an invasion by the inhabitants of the Moon. He and his crew travel from the Earth to the Moon, and back again, trying to stop the evil plan of Retik, the great Moon ruler. 

My Rating (out of five stars): ** 

I was pretty excited to watch this, I’m not gonna lie. I’m someone who has viewed hundreds of Classical Hollywood movies, but I had never seen an entire old “serial.” Serials were 15-minute shorts that ran before a feature film- most were westerns, jungle adventures, or sci-fi. They consisted of about 12 chapters, and a new one would be released each week. Their main attributes were recurring characters, an overarching story, and an impossible cliffhanger at the end of each chapter. With a title like Radar Men from the Moon, I was ready to strap myself in for some cheap campy fun. It partly delivered, but by the 7th episode, I was pretty sick of the predictable repetitiveness of it all. (some minor spoilers)

The Good: 

I generally liked Commando Cody. He didn’t look like your typical action hero- he reminded me of a mixture of a young Spencer Tracy and a young Gene Hackman. Sometimes his nondescript manner made him a little underwhelming in the charisma department, but I still liked him overall. 

I liked Joan the female sidekick. She was smart, brave, and did some of her own fighting. She was not a damsel in distress. She also wasn’t romantically involved with Cody, which surprised me.  

Krog is a stupidly great name for an alien! His character wasn’t as interesting as his name, but whatever. 

Retik, the Moon’s ruler, had a pretty bizarre costume. He looked like he was wearing some kind of psychotropic papal robe, but then he had a head covering designed with either lizard or fish scales! 

I loved the name of the Moon’s equivalent to uranium- it was called lunarium! Guffaw. 

The special effect of Cody flying with his jet pack was actually pretty good for something this low budget. I thought it looked better than the Superman effect from the 1952 TV show. 

My favorite special effect was the melting mountain one. Rocks were supposed to be melting into molten lava, and it looked pretty damn impressive. 

The “futuristic” technology, the absurd plot, the janky costumes and effects... it was entertainingly goofy in most of the ways you’d hope. 

The Bad: 

Why did they name our hero Commando Cody? I’m sure it had nothing to do with the fact that Space Patrol, starring Commander Correy, was a huge radio and tv hit at the time! (What’s with “Commando” btw? All I can think of is what might or might not be under Cody’s uniform!) 

This should really have been called Fist Fighting Men from the Moon, because almost every time the bad guys dueled, they were just duking it out with their hands. It got very VERY tiresome. They had ray-guns and moon technology, but fistfights were supposed to be more exciting? No, they were just more cheap, I’m sure. 

Next to fist fights, car chases were the most common way to combat the enemy. In sci-fi. How is that cool? 

Too much time was spent on Earth. I wanted more of the Moon! 

Although... the Moon was a place filled with ancient Roman architecture, Frankenstein-esque laboratories, and a sunny atmosphere just like the Earth’s. It didn’t make for fascinating viewing. 

There were also blue skies all the way to the moon via the rocket ship. Who said space had to be dark? 

Re: the title- where were the Radar Men? It was a phrase or concept never once uttered. Letdown! 

The action and adventure didn’t really pan out like I hoped it would. My imagination was much more vivid than what was on the screen. 

The whole thing was pretty predictable. 

The cliffhangers at the end of each chapter lost their power very quickly. Each time it looked like there was no possible way Cody could have survived the final sequence, but each time he came back because of some miraculous escape or a bit of crazy luck. I never once thought- “Oh, no! Is he ok? Will he be alive next week?”  

The final scene ended on some dopey humor, which was already a trope apparently. 1) The heroes win! 2) The heroes celebrate with humility! 3) Someone does something a little silly or makes a little mistake and everyone laughs! Ha ha ha! 

[that-one-weeb-buts-its-the-main]

Being Frank Castle's Daughter in Hawkins Pt 5

Gif Caption: Top gif- Billy Russo v Frank Castle in Marvel's The Punisher, Bottom Gif- Steve Harrington in Netflix's Stranger Things

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Reader: 17-18 age range | fem reader

Characters Mentioned: Frank Castle (MCU), Loki Laufeyson (MCU), Thor Odinson (MCU), Korg (MCU), Dr.Strange (briefly, MCU), Wong (briefly, MCU), Steve Harrington (ST), Billy Hargrove (ST), Max Mayfeild (ST), Jim Hopper (briefly, ST) Joyce Byers (brefily, ST)

A/n: shorter than usual sorry

Warnings: nothing really surpised? Yeah me too

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Yeah just as you had assumed, everyone had been too in shock to even call a news company

Mostly to see Korg and his 7'7 ness

But Thor.

All the girls loved thor, all the kids loved Thor, everyone loved Thor

So it made it easier to litterally just walk away from him with your group to do whatever you wanted

"So." Y/n spoke up, "why are you all here?"

"Why are we here? Or how did we get here?" Loki questioned.

Y/n raised a brow, "Well to answer your question, Jane broke up with Thor. And now his Hammer the only thing that can get us out of this damn town. Is broken up with him too."

"Did he just say a hammer broke up-" Max started.

"Don't ask." Billy intruppted walking past the three as they walked there way down the street and into the small Arcade.

"And let me guess."

"We ticked off the wizard." Loki spoke as Y/n sighed.

"Okay. Okay this is fine."

Loki seemed to ignore Y/n entirely as she planned out what to do outloud. The arcade had become pratically empty due to Thor being out in the street. And he watched Max fish for quaters in her pockets.

"Damn it. No coins."

"No coins?" Loki questioned.

"Quaters. To play the games." Max spoke.

"And these quaters? They stay in these...boxes."

"Yeah usually till someone comes to collect them."

"They don't call me the god of mischef for anything midgardian."

And Max and Loki became friends because Loki helped her with some magic that coughed up all the quaters from one game.

Max is rich at that point

He had to conjure up bucket.

And Billy? Billy's sitting you on a stool and handing you a water he bought from a vending machine

"I mean I don't get it!" Y/n protested, "Why dump them on me! Korg I understand! He's sweet!'-"

"Aw thank you. Thats very nice of you." Korg thanked.

" But Thor!? And Loki!?" Y/n argued, "i already helped Dr.Jack off with his own fuckin problems! Why do I have to deal with it again!? And Frank!? Frank thinks I just helped him at the grocery store! Its not like its uncommon to see heros at the stores!"

"City bird." Billy tried to catch her attention

"What if something big comes!? What happens if they brought some interdimensinoal fuck up like me thats whats to kill everyone!"

"Castiglione!" Billy called again.

"Don't get me started! I'd have to deal with the Sokovia accord of course! And Tony! UGH! Don't get me started on him! And steve! Roggers not Harrington! He'd be all like "Im dispointed in you yadda yadda yadda" Like I didnt wipe the total floor with his ass! And I-"

"Y/n! Hello!" Billy finally shouted at her.

She stopped finally, "ask the rock monster you dumbass."

Y/n sighed and looked up at Korg, "You...guys didnt bring a problem with you?"

"Besides Thor's sad love life and Loki. No. I don't believe so." Korg explained a sigh a relief from Y/n, "there is one problem though: and that we have no way home."

"Y/n!" Max called running over, "Look at all the quaters!"

She had an old icecream bucket, shallow filled with quaters.

"Wanna play a game!? I'll totally floor you in street fighter! Already floored Loki."

"Trust me. Thats no real feat." Y/n told her.

"I heard that!" Loki argued.

"But Maybe Korg like to play?"

"Me?" Korg asked, "I'd love too."

Korgs too pure for this world and any other at that

You come up with and idea and hop over the counter to reach the phone all the employees are gone to meet the hero anyways.

You'll calling the one the only

Sorcerer Supreme

"Wong Speaking-"

"Wong!" Y/n spoke, "You have no idea how glad it is to hear your voice! Look Strange portaled Thor along with Loki and Korg. With no hammer. Im kinda busy trying to keep oh I dont know. A low profile. Low Profile ring a bell?

"Oh no." Wong corrected, "That was me. Call it punishment for skipping town on me."

Even now you're being punished

The line cuts and you're completely in mental agony

And your roping Max and Billy into it

Not that Max isn't happy to be roped into it though

And Billy, well Billy puts up with your shit because he loves you

But you need a cover your face so the media isn't tracking you, and so do the other two you know: regular people, god imagine being normal, how you wished to be normal sometimes

Billy and Max find a Halloween mask in the back like badasses, but can only find you a teddy bear costume head

So you bring the truck and have everyone load in the back, then go towards the mass of people happy to see such a hero and basically blow the horn out you lay it down so hard

"Get in the truck!"

"Y/-"

"Say my name and you'll be dead hammer boy! Hurry!"

the woman chase him to the truck as he jumps through the window as you floor it and drive away.

"Y/n! By the gods I love you! Thank you!"

"Yeah, Yeah, So who pissed Wong off?"

yeah it went real silent after that

Turns out Thor had been takin' this breakup thing. a lot harder than you originally thought

Also, you finally took off that stupid bear head,

"What do we do with them?" Billy asked.

"Take 'em to my house." Y/n spoke, "We can sneak them through the window."

It was a decent plan, you'd just have to tell Frank you didn't feel good and he'd leave you alone, letting you wait out the day

When you got home, everyone got out, and you asked Billy to help in bringing them to the back

You went inside, and Frank was doing some weapons cleaning

"Hey, kid."

"Hey..."

He stopped and looked up, "Everythin' alright? Home earlier than I expected."

"Yeah, just, was doin' some stuff, and started feeling like crap.."

He stood up, wiping his hands on a rag, and put his hand on her forehead

"think it might of been the sugar from last night too much."

"yeah. alright." He spoke pulling a strand of hair behind her ear, kissing her forehead, "Go get some rest."

She nodded, "yeah thanks."

Oh god, it worked, she went into her room, quickly locked the door, and rushed over to the window,

"Be quiet and be quick."

Korg happily helped everyone into the room, simply by picking them up and placing them through the window.

The only question was, how was he going to get in? He couldn't fit through the window and if he could it'd be a hell of a tight squeeze

Somehow some way he got in,

Now your rooms are filled with aliens in laments terms

You're so glad Max ad Loki had become friends and that Korg was friendly, she was able to babysit the two as they played Thor games

While Thor rambled on to you and Billy like it was some sleepover

"And then she broke up with me! well, I let her think that-" Thor spoke defensively.

"Okay one, keep your voice down. Two wow." Y/n spoke painting her nails black, "I'm so surprised."

"Exactly." Thor spoke, "If anything I broke up with her."

Billy was smoking a cigarette beside the bed, with the window opened, "Wow."

"And what is your Verdict? Billy Hargrove of Midgard, You have managed to capture the heart of the most ferocious fighter of all Midgard, and my dearest friend yet my most formidable human opponent."

"her?" Billy spoke, gesturing to Y/n with the hand his cigarette was holding, "yeah, no."

He took another puff of his cigarette.

"Am I mistaken?"

"Highly," Y/n spoke blowing on her freshly black nails.

"Nonsense," Thor spoke, "The letter you sent describes him as a-"

"And that's enough from you," Y/n spoke interrupting him, "How are the others?"

you managed to keep them hidden for the day, and when it hit's about 9:30 at night, a portal opens up randomly in your room, and in steps Dr.Strange and takes them all away.

"You're a piece of shit," Y/n spoke with crossed arms, "I know you most likely helped Wong get them through that portal."

"I know," Stephen spoke letting everyone file into the portal and out into the new york sanctum, "Guilty as charged."

"Where does this lead to?" Max asked sticking her arm in the portal.

"New York," Y/n responded looking at Billy, "Don't try it."

"Fuck you."

"When and where?"

"Nice to see you haven't changed." Stephen spoke, "We could use you back in New York you know. A room at the Sanctum always has your name on it. Plus I can't handle any of these new kids running around New York- especially Parker."

Y/n nodded with a chuckle, "You know I want to come back."

"Doors open." He spoke.

"Yeah." Y/n spoke, "I think needs are different than wants. And I think I'm needed here."

He nodded holding his hand out as they shook: "I know the feeling all to well."

And then he left leaving the three in the now quiet room

"What the hell." Billy argued slapping Y/n on the back of the head, "Im needed here? That was your ticket out of here dumbass."

"I told you I'd take you though, didn't I?"

God he fucking hates how much he loves you

You luckily are able to sneak out and drive them home.

You're pretty sure at this point though, with all the sneaking Frank knows

He's just usually too high alert to not know

But you had a good day, even though it was long and tirind just to go to bed immediately and missing the daily call from Steve

He knows your busy but you usually always pick up even if you end up telling him your busy and hanging up.

He gets in trouble for it. Why? Because they're at another dinner, and his moms trying to have him make friends with some of her friends daughter

But no. He's standing by the phone calling you for the second time.

But still no answer. He's already mentally planned that he's gonna go see if your okay tommrow

Ah yes. Tommrow

The next day for you would be uh. Eventful in the morning.

Especially when you're up and Frank's not up

Thats always been werid

And fucking in walks Joyce Byers in Pajama's

Excuse me? And why the fuck did she just walk out of Franks room

They were too stunned to speak

"Uh...Hi...Ibuprofen please, if you have any to spare." She asked sweetly

"Uh...I mean....yeah." y/n spoke, still in shock, "Yeah! Yeah! Uh! Let me look..."

You give her some and a glass of water you were originally pouring for herself

She then says she'll go, and thank you again, but you tell her akwardly she can stay, bur she says shes gonna go anyways and contuines to thank you

What the f u c k just happened

And then in comes Frank like nothing happened

Do you engage? Do you not?

You do pour both of you ceral,

Atleast cornflakes made things a bit better

Still do you ask

"So." Frank spoke, "What did the Avenger's want with you?"

Fuck he knows

"There dealing with Hard times." Y/n spoke, "Im expecting the woman that just walked out wanted the same from you? Is that like a one time thing? Or? Should I insolate my walls just in case?"

Oh

He almost spit out his ceral when you said that

Two can play this game

Luckily Steve saves the day, when he knocks on the door

"Oh Hey." Y/n spoke bowl in hand, "Whats up?"

"Uh. I called last night and you didn't answer." He spoke, "Got...worried."

Y/n smiled, "Yeah sorry. I ended up having a long day."

He laughed, "Yeah, I heard about that superhero came to town. Bet you were busy with him."

Y/n was silent, "wait. Was he really here to see you?"

"More of less." Y/n spoke.

"Are you two...ya know?" Steve asked quietly.

"What?" Y/n asked walking out the door as Y/n closed it behind her.

"Dating-"

"Ew!" Y/n protested.

"I don't know!" He defended, "Thats not why I came here!"

"What's it then?" Y/n asked

"I came to see if you were okay." He spoke, "now i see that was stupid especially if you were hanging out with a fricken Avenger."

"You'd be surpised what shit they put me through." She smiled, causing him to smile and hold a laugh in "was that Harrington?"

"...yeah.. yeah." He spoke rocking back and forth Y/n standing up with now an empty bowl ready to go back inside, "actually."

"Yeah?"

"How about we go." Steve spoke.

"Go? Go Where?" Y/n asked.

"You've been in Hawkins yet still havent seen any of the good spots." Steve started, "I could. Take you around...if you know. If you want. Just me and you. If you're cool with that! Ya know..."

"Hm? Yeah that sounds great." Y/n smiled, "let me get dressed and say bye to my dad. You can come in if you want."

Steve's litterally throwing the biggest party in his head

Even you said not to worry he's still worried after all that shit his mom pulled

He's real glad when you say yes to him

He may be too excited

Frank says hi to Steve and they talk while he waits on you

When you ready to go, Frank tells you remember Matt's coming tomorrow and even pitches the idea of dinner to Steve, a retry without his parents: really just without his mom

Steve nervously agrees to it

And then the two of you leave

He's talkin nonstop, mostly trying to keep you entertained and impressed

"The best parts of Hawkins arent even town there out in the middle of no where. Ya knoe Nature and shit. But theres cool things in town." He explained, "what do you wanna do first?"

Y/n shrugged, "Whatever makes it the easiest to see everything."

So he takes you around town first, showing you all his favorite shops and such, and even points out a fair fyler, that's be opened the 30th and then ongoing for the season of Fall

You've never really been to a fair, Frank steers clear of them

But he continues to take you around: enjoying the alone time with you.

You've guys got lemonades in hand as you both walk, he's staring at your free hand hanging between the two of you

"So uh." Steve spoke up, "Got anyone..special. back in the big apple?"

"Define special." Y/n joked.

Steve chuckled knew if about her run ins with hero's, "you know...you like anybody?"

"Well of course. All my friends are back there." Y/b spoke.

"Yeah. Yea...but like. Like. Anyone?" He asked they getting in the car, "dating, perhaps..."

"Oh." Y/n spoke following him, "I mean. I got close one time...It didn't work out."

They closed the doors behind them, "Oh. I. Im sorry I asked."

"No no its okay."

"Hey. Take it from me. Guys can be dicks." Steve tried to cheer up.

Y/n smiled, "not this one."

Steve frowned, Y/n seemed to really like this guy, "right person, Wrong time. It happens alot."

"Not enough time." Y/n spoke, "There wasnt enough."

Steve went silent, as he drove,"I. Im sorry bringin up bad memories and all."

"No. No its alright." Y/n spoke, "It's in the past."

He nodded, "Just. Know that Im here. For anything. I want to help, ya know? I really, really-"

He stopped himself, "I wanna. Y/n I."

"You don't have to tell me."

"I. I want to! I know I do." Steve argued with himself, "I just. Dont wanna loose you ya know."

He took a right, "Loose me to what Steve?"

"I don't know: Anything. Everything." He took a deep breathe parking the car in a make shift lot in the woods, "All I know is that. I...really do...like you. Like. Alot. You're funny, and cool, and...your an ass kicker."

He laughed, Y/n joining him, "and. I just know. That your a good person. So. Thank you. Hah. Yeha thank you for sticking around Hawkins hair prince."

Previous Part - Next Part

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Tags! (Its grow again! Yes!!!) @raelwrites @miiikkeey @beebslebobs @ah-witch @supernaturallover2002 @pearlstiare @simonsbluee @stilllivindue2spite @lvbred

[loiswasadevil]

Why did u live off the grid

Welp. I knew this question would get asked. My life off the grid started in 2000 or so when my dad decided we needed to have a "more pure" way of life. We rented out a camping plot in the mountains for an indefinite amount of time (my father was friends with the park director), he brought the whole family (me, jonas my brother, and my mom). we brought tools like axes, fishing rods, lighters, etc my dad was a boy scout and a hunter so he knew a lot about the wilderness. We didn't bring any food except for the preserves my dad would make each year and we brought no technology my dad thought it was corrupting the whole family. Jonas and I would alwayyyyys pretend to be peter and lois and we would pretend that the animal skulls were our Children, Stewie, Chris, And Meg. My dad fucking hated that i loved Family Guy because it reminded him of the old way of life so Jonas and I would only play at night we would start a fire about a mile away in a ditch so we wouldn't get caught. We would sing the theme song together each time and we would act out the episodes we remembered like the y2k episode and the episode where mr. weed chokes. After a couple years living off the grid my mom got pissed and my dad caved in and got a radio from the storage facility that had some of the stuff from our old life in it. My dad would never tell us where he hid that key to this day I don't know where it is or that storage locker. My mom would play that radio day and night. It drove me fucking insane. It wasn't fair. Why does she get to listen to music and the news, When i couldn't fucking watch family guy. So after weeks of listening to that radio i ripped the solar panel off of it and broke it into one million pieces and buried it where we would play family guy. I don't know why i did that since they were gonna notice and blame me or Jonas anyways so i took the radio and i threw it into the river. It made my mom so depressed but I didn't care. My dad freaked out and started tearing apart my tent looking for the radio and i screamed and cried i didn't have it and he found all my drawings of the Griffin and Simpson families and burned them one by one until i would tell him what i did with the radio. I swore i didn't know and blamed it on junkies. He burned every single picture i drew, Including a Simpsons Family Guy Crossover (which i remember very well). My mom grew distant from the whole Family after that day. Me and Jonas would still sneak off to our Fam guy spot to play and talk so our dad wouldn't hear. My dad fucking hated when we would go out of his sight so we would do it at night. One day we wanted to go further out, so we marked our way as we left the ditch and carried on. Jonas fell into some rocks and got his knees really bloody but he said he didn't really feel it. We considered it a bad omen of some sort and went back. We cleaned up Jonases wounds in the river and using some of the stuff we had and pretended that nothing happened. The next morning my dad was fucking pissed when he saw all the blood around our stuff and in jonases shoes and he screamed at us so much, He grounded us in separate tents for a week. While we were grounded jonas died of typhus, I freaked out so fucking bad and it drove my mom to the edge. She threw all our fishing rods into the river and broke the tent stakes and dragged me out of the mountains without saying a word and I followed her. I dont really think about how i never got to talk to jonas before he died. Maybe it was my fault and he only got sick because we wondered off without my dads watchful eye... Honestly im just glad i escaped from my mom and Now i have technology and can watch Family Guy and other shows Like American Dad. He said internet was a curse but i think it was a blessing, If it weren't for anime and facebook i wouldn't have met my boyriend @peateargriffin, and i wouldn't shift to Family Guy Every night with him, to raise our children Stewie, Chris, And Meg.

[possumkingluca]

hey look more: "No wonder he cries a lot, you're his best friend" "Is there like a speaker button on this thing" (rock) "you're acting like my mom didn't describe aero as the purple people eater" "i take that as a compliment" "i just want to trick Quentillius into thinking we found the head of vecna then convince him to... try it on" "Why would!!!! He do that!!!!!!!!!" "alok made a fish zombie" "OUR BIOWEAPON :((((" "WOMEN IN S.T.E.M!!!" (referring to a fucking founder dragon) "Quentillius and Azazel have been infected with I'm Gonna Fucking Kill Somebody disease" "if not themselves" "Fish want women, fear fear me" "Bruno Neptune" (my favorite music artist) "To kill a parrotfish" (psychological thriller) "You made us a three course meal of lore and we wanted chicken strips" "You're gon end up as a serial killer and I'm going to be your first victim"

"THERE ARE NO SMILEY FRIES" "I got to flush you guys down the toilet" "Idea: put formaldehyde in quentillius’s drink." *27 on a DC 30 check* (UUUAAAAAGHHHHHHHH) "gonna crucify alok :3" "smad :( " (flumph <3) "how did you pass? Quentillius failing i can believe but you passing? impossible" "the longer this campaign goes on the dumber we get. you're eating our brain cells." "I tried preventing everyone from trying to kill quentillius and then the circus music started and I lost all sympathy" "so... help me find a well?" "he lived in the slop" "booing at quentillius is not enough he needs to d i e" "sorry i got in trouble with my parents last time i lent out embalming fluid so that's a no anyway" "scorpions /negative" "it's not murder if he kills himself" "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT" "hedgehog" "NO" "Please don't cyanize the cake" "too late" "azazel should go through a 'be eaten by aero for dinner' arc. just sayin." "no." "I never thought I'd have to live in fear of the possibility of my players abruptly performing waterboarding on steroids on an npc." "Aero looks like they'd take a bite out of drywall, so you're doing something right" "stank druid" "not me adding aero eye lore" "i did not write all those notes just to let the campaign fizzle out before russell gets to exploit them" (please fighter come home from war (work) so the DM can torment me :((( plese) "aero exhibits orange cat behavior" "why does that guy look like Quentillius if he was more of a loser" (azazel) "why are all the fashion designers named after U.S presidents" "quentillius with depression" "that's just azazel" "Child labor laws are just suggestions" "aero's husband??? is cadoras not good enough to have a name anymore???" "Sorry not sorry for lying about the notes" (i am going to commit a criminal offense) "if you're going to call him azzy at least use the proper spelling smh" "Aero wanted to marry Azazel off so that Azazel wouldnt go senile" "do you think alok has evil autism. do you think he hyperfixates on being evil" "Little miss Lemme-eat-ur-appendix" "is that alok" "no" "he looks just as depressed as alok" "death by chandelier is very natural" "NO???" "do you think middle aged is old aged" "practically ancient" "i mean probably because racism" "Don't forget it is fun bullying him. Even if he joins cult because of it." "larine jumpscare" "sopping wet cat of a bard" "the lion has a bad case of middle schooler syndrome" "I don't want him to die a horrible painful death... …I'm still torturing him"

dumb quotes from the strixhaven and now homebrewed after graduation campaign i'm in that i think about a lot with context only when it's necessary (and some from the campaign groupchat and conversations i have had with other members or the DM): "If you don't make a move I'll date him" (the person saying this had a boyfriend.) "Taste the rainbow bitch"

"I BECAME A ROTISSERIE CHICKEN" "FUCK YOU MELENTOR" "I hope the latex gets caught in your throat" "I wish my biological parents ate me" "A necromancer never dies" (right before dying) "I HAVE A PIPE BOMB" "We're going to drag Grayson out of his office by his ankles" (right before finding him tied up in a closet and finding out he has been being tortured for SIX FUCKING MONTHS) "I want to crack Grayson's spine like a glowstick" (Unrelated to previous quote and also completely unprompted) "That is NOT a kobold, that is john from lit 101" "Just pocket change to you guys" (1,000 PLATINUM???) "Go play with your boytoy of a lizard" (awful, GOD AWFUL.) "Stop running away and give me a fair fight" (person saying this literally was incapable of taking damage. I am not exaggerating. Straight up invincible) "YOU LEFT ME IN THE SAND"

"Should've put it in a wig" (zombie) "He's gonna call me a whole swear word :(" "Mr. Alex I don't feel too good" (while becoming a rock) "You'll never amount to anything" (uncalled for)

"Not if i'm fast enough" (frequent) "Stop bullying the blind guy" (FREQUENT) "The seahorse fortnite dances" "WHY DOES HE LOOK LIKE A DISEASED MR BEAN" "We need to take away this guy's balls" "You forgot Alex's half shaven beard" "Get out of my house" (frequent) "Slaad jerky" "Teeth chandelier" "Aero works on something with Nora, Alex has a heartwarming moment, Alok.. cuts his hand open, AND RAMPART'S GOING TO WAR." "Friendship ended with KACKLES Now MINA'S CREATURE FROM THE ABYSS is my best friend" "Fuck you" "I'd rather not see that" "azazel kinda hot, hopefully quentillius's type" "🤨" "YOU ARE NOT TAXIDERMYING AN ENTIRE ADULT DRAGON AND PUTTING IT ON MY HOUSE" "Funeral Outfit" "You look drop dead gorgeous" (actual compliment) "Don't patronize me." "We're just discussing how Azazel doesn't have any friends" "OH GODS HE WAS RIGHT ABOUT THE FROGS" "FOR GRANDMAAAAAAAAAA" "STOP MAKING DRAZHOMIR CRY" (FREQUENT) "...do you think quentillius would care if I trashed his dorm and left a puddle of blood on the carpet?" "YEAH?" "Quenzazel" "you are not supposed to encourage this" "You want to kiss him ON THE LIPS" "Aurora's the only one who won't psychoanalyze me" "I WANT MY FRIENDS BACK" "Is this Rampart's friend?" "NO" "He's fine-" "Oh thank god" "But-" "NO." "Don't eat it" (frequent) "I have interacted with Larine like 4 times and we are best friends" "I almost died saving a man I knew for 5 minutes" "Me and Urzmaktok are out of a job! :D Strixhaven shut down! :D" i will add more. that is a threat.

[wuxiaphoenix]

Worldbuilding: Some Writing References On The Little Ice Age

A reader asked for a list of what I was reading recently for an Idea. Specifically, someone dumped into a fantasy version of the 1600s near Korea. (The poor guy.) So I started pulling it together....

Er. It was a lot longer than I thought.

So. What I’ve read in the past or currently related to this includes....

Ancient Inventions, by Peter James. Ranges across the world and history up to the Middle Ages, never a lot of details but plenty of pics, and there’s bits on acupuncture, how old sewing is, and why before steam engines you wanted a waterwheel near a mine, if you could.

Several books by Conrad Totman: Early Modern Japan. Japan: An Environmental History. The Green Archipelago: Forestry in Preindustrial Japan. These books aim for an environmental slant, but they also end up covering a lot of daily life and political maneuvers because, guess what, what people do that way affects the environment! Also he is an excellent writer, with good flow.

The Culture of Civil War in Kyoto, by Mary Elizabeth Berry. Warning, this one can be a bit dark, a lot of people died in the Warring States Era, and the attitude of survivors of a whole century-plus of constant war was sometimes not healthy.

Samurai William: The Englishman Who Opened Japan, by Giles Milton. Focuses on our sailor, but gets into Japanese politics versus the rest of the world, and how that worked out for the English, Portuguese, and Dutch who wanted to trade. (The Dutch won for a lot of reasons, but mainly because they were smart enough to bring wanted products instead of broadcloth, and kept religion out of it.)

1493: Uncovering the New World Columbus Created, by Charles C. Mann. Have read from local libraries, sometime want to get a reference copy. Covers the ecological consequences of Columbus and everyone sailing after him, with consequences that rocked around the world as new plants, animals, and diseases spread.

A book on a Japanese diving village which I cannot find the name for, darn it. For all I know it was a very small press thing; it was in an EPA library, of all places. It was black-and-white photography of the people, what they did, and how they lived. Maybe 60-odd pages? If you ever read my fanfic “Shadows in Starlight” and wondered where I got the fishing village that saved Obi-Wan and Kenshin out of a scrape, it’s from this book, as well as the next one.

Fishing Villages in Tokugawa Japan, by Arne Kalland. Unfortunately, this one appears to be out of print. I hope my copy made it through the move. A lot of dry anthropological detail, but it covers how plain old ordinary fisherfolk lived in those times, including their farming and salt-making.

Everyday Life in Joseon Korea. Got this a couple months ago; it’s a translated collection of essays by Korean historians, and is Exactly What It Says On The Tin. It’s got a whole farming calendar, things people ate, how they traded, how they made salt, why you wanted to be a translator if you could, and a bunch of political shenanigans to boot.  

Ginseng and Borderland, by Seonmin Kim. Also a recent acquisition. Mostly about the Joseon Dynasty’s interactions with the Qing Empire, and how they leveraged being a dependent kingdom in a kind of political judo to keep Chinese armies off their border. So a little later than I’m aiming, but it does bring up “what the situation was in Ming before things got messy”. And it’s about ginseng, and the lengths people go to get it, and that is just plain interesting.

Side note here: If you study biogeography at all, there is an interesting biological hiccup in what species are where that no one’s quite pinned down the reason for yet. In short: there are a lot of species in Eastern Asia (including Japan) that have related species in the Southeastern U.S. For example, while crocodiles are across the globe, there are only two species of alligators: American and Chinese. There are three species of wisteria; Chinese, Japanese, and American. And depending who you ask, there are only two or three species of ginseng. Native to - have you guessed yet? - East Asia, historically Manchuria/Northern Korea... and the one in the Appalachians (also in Wisconsin). So if you’ve spent time in the Southeast, there’s... how to put it... a baseline familiarity about the environment over there.

Global Crisis: War, Climate Change, & Catastrophe in the Seventeenth Century by Geoffrey Parker. This one I’ve got now, and am making my way through.

Kindle samples I’ve read, and I want the whole book of, include:

Flowering Plums and Curio Cabinets, by Sunglim Kim. From the way the book’s presented on Amazon you’d think it was a dry academic analysis of art styles. For all I know what’s past the sample might have some of that, but the start, at least, has tons of bits of info on who was making art, why, where they lived, and what businesses and people could be found where in Hanseong (modern-day Seoul). So it’s potentially a treasure trove of details. Interesting.

A Global History of Ginseng: Imperialism, Modernity and Orientalism, by Heasim Sul. Again, ginseng and history.

Catholics and Anti-Catholicism in Chosŏn Korea by Don Baker and Franklin Rausch. So far an interesting look on the Confucian mindset, and what problems there were with it; some of which led to conversions to Catholicism in Joseon Korea. Only Confucianism was considered the basis of the state, and things got very messy.

The Gunpowder Age: China, Military Innovation, and the Rise of the West in World History, by Tonio Andrade. Covers gunpowder, how it developed, and why there was eventually a split between Europe and China in tech. The author thinks the main problem may have been the Qing Empire had too few enemies, until it suddenly had too many enemies. And thus lost the institutional military skills and know-how needed to keep militaries innovating.

Bringing Whales Ashore: Oceans and the Environment of Early Modern Japan, by Jakobina K. Arch. Where Conrad Totman covered “The Green Archipelago” of Early Modern Japan, and how it kept pressing against its ecological limits, this book wants to cover the “Aquamarine Archipelago” and explore how Japan exploited marine resources through the Tokugawa age on.

The Great East Asian War and the Birth of the Korean Nation by JaHyun Kim Haboush, William Haboush, and Jisoo Kim. Covers the Imjin War, the surprising amount of ordinary people rising in militias, and how that got people of the Joseon Dynasty to start thinking of themselves as a nation instead of just a kingdom.

And there’s at least a half-dozen more samples on Ming, Qing, and Joseon Korea I haven’t gotten to quite yet....

*Stares at list.*

...You know that face you make when you realize you could drop a thousand on Amazon, easy, and barely make a Wishlist dent? Yeah, I’m making that face.

(Especially if I got some of the DVDs I want for story research. Dr. Jin and Live Up To Your Name, to list two. Timetravel isekai! With doctors!)

So! Hope this might come in handy; either for direct research, or for people trying to get a handle on “what do I look for to research history beyond politics?”

[puyopuyo]

Why do you guys hate Shane 😭 Dude is just an extremely depressed alcoholic. He’s nice once you get close to him, and he goes sees a therapist. It’s either his depression speaking, but it seemed like he felt people look down on him. Or who knows his past interactions with people that has made him not trust/feel comfortable. No one owes you friendship, he just tells you to leave him alone. But if you push it, he’s nice. You guys hate him, but have Haley who actually straight up offends you. And then Abigail expresses being upset because the farm isn’t abandoned anymore and she can’t hang out there, as if your beloved grandfather’s farm somehow is some place she has some right to and not your property. Both very rude. I personally wanted to befriend him because I understand feeling like an outcast, and being alone in the corner. And I also understood being depressed and using things such as drinking as a coping mechanism. And his character is a farmer technically, and he has no potential love interest like the other characters have. In the flower dance he dances with whoever was left over. He just has his aunt Marnie and his goddaughter, Jas, who is very cute. She lost her parents. He wasn’t raised by his parents either I think, that I forget if he lost them also or what. He also loves his chickens very much. He’s personally my favorite character. Sebastian is also nice. He’s usually busy in his room working as a programmer often, but he’s very nice. He actually spends some time looking outside. Sits near the ocean when it rains, and hangs outside in the evening in either Spring or Summer, or was it both, so he has an appreciation for beauty. He’s a musician as well, so has an appreciation for music. Also a favorite. Everyone else seems fine or are nice. Some maybe feel weird at first, but they’re not rude like Haley or Abigail, though Haley was the most rude. Just the trailer lady yells at you if you go in her trailer when she’s not there. I did it when trying to find everyone to greet. And the old man is grumpy, but he’s an old man.

i'm so sorry i can't read this whole thing, but basically all the characters in stardew valley are cunts except for the ones who appreciate my fish gifts. shane is especially cunty though, i sling rocks at him on his way to work at the bobo mart.