#this felt like twitter calling me a slur

[colorisbyshe]

while scrolling thru twitter for todays festivities the #1 ad i kept getting was yakuza mpreg and i can’t tell if i was getting that ad because the algorithm jsut thought i would like it or if it’s because i’ve just blocked every other advertiser there

[dream-sans-mogai]

Anyway, because I'm considered a bigger creator within the mogai community and I have a responsibility to address things given my bigger audience-

Please remember that Tumblr, especially LGBT Tumblr concerning discourse and intracommunity issues, is a hyper niche, reactive, violent, sensitive community with next to zero basis in reality at large and you should not take any of its opinions as absolute fact. Especially the mogai community's opinions.

A lot of people on mogai Tumblr talk big game with very clearly fake the-whole-bus-clapped stories about the real world concerning acceptance towards mspec monos, Neopronouns and Xenogenders and it's my job as an adult and guiding voice to remind people these experiences may happen but rarely do and you absolutely should not just tell random people you use purr/purrs pronouns or your a bi gaybian or you identify as Chronosian or other things like that because it's really fucking dangerous even in hyper progressive places like new york, cali and Detroit. It can be deadly in many many small towns, including ones in progressive states. Especially dangerous in non accepting states.

I don't say this to burst your bubble or ruin your hopeful world view but many stories of acceptance are fake, even if some are true, most of the community is underage and just cause your teacher may approve of your Soniccharic identity, doesn't mean they won't tell your transphobic parents. It's scary and dangerous out here for trans and gay people rn and I won't be one of the idiots who tell you to run and frolic with your Xenogender pins Infront of increasingly hostile transphobes. I want the younger gen z trans people to survive and I won't lie to you about the reality of the battle we all are staring down concerning project 2025.

Most of the people telling these stories live in progressive states and do not tell you about the failed times or exaggerate the acceptance they supposedly received. I'm telling you from the mouth of someone who grew up in a tiny town in South Ohio with less than 1,000 people, it's still just as dangerous as it was 10 years ago. I still get followed in my home town. I still get stares in my home town. My actual home town, a place I grew up in where people knew me as the gnc dyke for a good while in my last 2 years of school. Do not spread this shit around to everyone. Nex didn't think they would become a victim, Brianna didn't think she would be one of the unlucky ones, plenty of those we've lost did not think they would die in hate crimes. I almost died in two of the hate crimes I've experienced.

You need to be really fucking careful and although I love than Neopronouns and Xenogenders are becoming more accepted by the larger LGBT community, you need to be very very VERY careful about what you do, what you wear and who you tell what because word spreads fast in suburbia and hate spreads faster. You do not want to be wearing a pin the day some white cishet magat decides he's tired of the "pedophiles" and chooses you as the first victim because you were the first he saw. Don't hide who you are but Be. Fucking. Careful.

[matoitech]

i think it was a cop out from promare fans to avoid talking seriously abt galo’s character to see them saying shit like ‘some ppl r weird abt galos relationship w his dad so we cant talk abt his trauma from him lest ppl Interpret It Wrong’ like sure awesome that makes perfect sense god forbid you talk abt the protagonist of the movies trauma or relationship with the antagonist that was basically his father 2 him, bcuz yaoi fangirls will do Whatever It Takes to invent the most disgusting obviously nuts shit youve ever seen. the clear solution here is to never talk seriously abt galo as a character at all and avoid talking abt his relationship w the antagonist the guy who abused him since he was a kid bcuz surely that feels less weird than saying ‘this is just insane and clearly said to be disgusting so dont give it the time of fucking day’! whose idea was THAT

like to be honest! while i was very detached from Promare Fandom at its height bcuz i did not want this movie i rly liked and characters and relationship w galolio i rly related to and enjoyed as a bi man to b soured at all from batshit fandom mommies thinking every media with mechs was voltron 2.0, i still saw shit with even ‘normal’ fans where there were times when it felt like ppl were so incapable of recognizing basic homophobic stereotypes abt gay men that theyd see an adult woman broadcasting abt how much she wanted 2 rape autistic ppl say ‘galos a degenerate faggot so he was surely in love with his dad actually, and its not incest bcuz its adoptive lol so you cant say anything to me abt my INTERPRETATION and LITERARY ANALYSIS!!!!!’ and ppl were like well shoot! she said Literary Analysis we cant get her now girls. and well he is an um, an F Slur, so, who knows lol! u know how they are, the fucking freaks! like. are you fucking kidding me. the homophobia and fandom brainrot is so prevalant even in self proclaimed ‘normal lgbt fandom spaces’. i think u ppl needed. to think anything through. for maybe, Five seconds

[folkloresthings]

BECAUSE I LIKED A BOY / CL16.

in which the world’s favourite pop princess becomes tangled in the life of a certain formula one driver, flipping her entire world upside down.

( charles leclerc x singer!au )

track one: lonesome. track two: fast times. track three: nonsense. track four: opposite. track five: how many things. track six: bad for business.

✩⡱ warnings: i don’t think so

TWITTER.

INSTAGRAM.

liked by carlossainz55, badgirlriri, and 739,017 others

yourusername don’t leave me alone

view all 562,937 comments

danielricciardo 🥺

user they seem so happy awh

⤷ user she’s probably just using him as a rebound on her ex, he deserves better

⤷ user girl stfu he’s not going to marry you

madelineargy you’re glowing 😍😍😍😍

user when did this happen???

landonorris the last picture is uncalled for

charles_leclerc 😘

INSTAGRAM.

liked by pierregasly, danielricciardo, and 871,305 more

charles_leclerc heaven sent

view all 328,592 comments

scuderiaferrari our favs 🫶

yourusername why are you outing me as a fangirl 😭

⤷ charles_leclerc honey, you do that yourself

user he called her honey im—

carlossainz55 bring her to the paddock this weekend!!

⤷ yourusername already coming! can’t wait to see my favourite ferrari boy 😩

⤷ charles_leclerc rude

the last comment makes you smile, one last look to the picture of charles on the screen (one you had taken) before you lock your phone, tucking it into the bag on your shoulder. it had been a magical few weeks — that time in a relationship that felt like you were floating, on top of the world. despite all of the comments online, criticism of die hard formula one fans, nothing could touch the pair of you. charles leclerc had swept you off of your feet, and there was nothing you could have done to stop it.

there was a party being thrown that night, one for all of the drivers, a small opportunity to relax after weeks and weeks of racing. lewis had sent you the location, some big nightclub in barcelona that the fia had rented out. full of celebrities, some you knew, some you didn’t. but you knew the drivers, at least.

“y/n!” lando slurs out, stumbling into your view as soon as you’d stepped inside the loud, dark room. the music was pumping, vibrating through your entire body and shaking your chest. you grinned at the young english driver’s evident drunkenness, many drinks ahead of you. “so glad you made it!”

“hi, lando,” you chuckle, patting his damp shoulder. he takes your hand, murmuring something about how nice your dress looked, before dragging you to the area that the driver’s had made themselves comfortable. each and every one of them greeted you kindly, hugging you and kissing your cheek. lewis slung an arm across your shoulder, pulling you into a photo without warning.

“hey! she was my best friend before she was charles’ girlfriend — back off.”

a smile tugs at your lips, fondly leaning into lewis’ grip. as they continue drinking, you make yourself comfortable with the other girlfriends, each of who had taken you under their wing.

“hey, have you seen charles?” you lean across to talk right in lily’s ear, the only way she’d have heard you. her eyes dart around, trying to place the monegasque boy amongst the crowds. she shakes her head, mirroring your previous position.

“last i saw him, he was going to get drinks.”

you send her a grateful smile, getting up to look over to where the bar was. you wanted to see him, desperately. to kiss him again, to have him hold you too close as you dance. as much as you loved lewis and the others, charles was the reason you were here.

excitement danced in your eyes, lovesick as you searched for the boy you’d committed to memory. you find him, right at the side of the bar, waiting for a drink. you push past someone to get closer, widening your view of him. your view of him and another: a brunette girl. she’s got her hand in his hair, her lips dancing near his ear. he laughs at whatever she says, handing her a glass of something.

your heart drops. right from your chest to the floor below you, and even though you haven’t had a drop to drink you swear you could throw up right there. he knew you were coming, didn’t he? either way, he didn’t seem to care. preoccupied with another, too cosy and too close, you want to laugh. how could you have been so stupid?

after minutes of being frozen to the same spot, shaken awake by the salt water that drips down your cheeks. fight or flight kicks in, six inch heels wobbling as you hurry backwards, pushing through everyone once again. tunnel vision to the exit, shoulder crashing roughly with another. a hard grip turns you to look at them, the silhouette of lewis blurred from your teary eyes.

“y/n, what—”

“i have to go. i’m sorry.”

TWITTER.

writer’s note: whoops sorry

[bambiniibambz]

Drunk Dial?

(not my art, credit goes to @Ayushnz or Ayu on Instagram and twitter)

Kento Nanami x Fem!reader

Warning - Smut, Vulgar language, Alcohol usage, Drunk sex,ETC. (Read at your own discretion)

A/N: This is my first smut, or my first time publishing a smut really. Please be kind and feel free to ask me to write about anything. I love writing however I have been afraid to do so until now.

-- I am open to constructive criticism, I was writing in the first person point of view, however, if you readers do not like that then I can change it per request.

The sound of the music was deafening, I didn’t even realize what was happening to me. The lights were flashing constantly all around me, I could feel the vibrations of the bass through my body. My legs felt like jello as I leaned from person to person trying to reach the bathroom. The smell of sweat filled my lungs, my own sweat dampening my hair making it stick to my forehead. My entire body was hot, feverish almost. My black dress kept riding up, I was in no shape or hurry to fix it. It felt like every step was a struggle. Everything was a daze, like I was in a dream. 

As I entered the bathroom I saw the lights flicker for a moment, or was that just me blinking? I shut the door, the music becoming a little muted and giving my ears and heart a break from the heavy rhythm. I turned to face the mirror, taking in my disheveled appearance. My eyes were bloodshot and glossy, my makeup a glittery mess. My long hair was frizzy, some of my hair strands sticking to my forehead and body. I felt hot and sticky and looked almost sunburnt. My entire body felt feverish and the smell of sweat was beginning to rise towards my nostrils. 

I leaned against the bathroom sink and reached up to feel my face, but I felt nothing. My nerves were not alerting me to the contact on my face. My tongue was also starting to feel foreign in my mouth, as if there was a big wet muscle wiggling around in my mouth. I let out a sigh and felt my breath hitch. I tried to shake off my drunken haze, tried to pull myself together a little as I pulled my dress down to try and cover my already exposed ass. The short black dress with long sleeves that hung off my shoulder was too short for my liking. I didn’t even know why I had decided to wear it out tonight. 

I struggled to fish my phone out of my mini black purse, the golden Saint Laurent latch on it was putting up a good fight with my shaky fingers. My eyes strained themselves with the screen of my phone, not being able to differentiate anything on it. I basically clicked random buttons until I finally got to my contacts, clicking on the first contact I saw. “A-HOLE”, it read. I huffed slightly, trying to convince myself to push my pride aside. I chewed my lip anxiously as I heard the phone ring once, then twice, then a click. He had answered. 

“Hello?”

I heard his tired voice come from the other end. He was most likely still at the office or working from home, when was he not working? I shuddered, a sudden chill coming over me as I tried to croak out a sentence. My voice came out slurred, which was not my intention.  “C-come get me.”

“Y/N?” His voice came out deep, it left a ringing in my chest. 

“mhm” I heard silence, then a sigh. 

“Nanami~?” I could hear myself whining the ‘N’ in his name. I wanted to go home.

“I have your location, wait in the bathroom and don’t say anything to anyone, do you understand?”

I mumbled a small ‘yes’ then walked to the nearest stall and sat down on the toilet. I heard him shuffling over the phone then I heard the jingle of his keys. I heard a door slam before the call ended, did I hang up or did he? 

I sat for quite a while, fiddling with the latch on my purse or the charms on my heels and jewelry. I saw the lights flicker on and off in the bathroom and heard girls walking in and out talking and giggling while going about their business. My head was reeling and the stall felt like it was spinning. I tried to ground myself, plant my feet on the floor and keep my head under my knees. I felt like I was flying and falling at the same time and I was beginning to get nauseous. 

I had no idea how much time had passed before I heard the bathroom door slam open. A few of the women that were in the bathroom began to scream in panic from the unexpected and sudden intrusion. I raised my head, breathing heavily as I heard the heavy footsteps pass each stall. The click clack of his dress shoes echoing through the bathroom as he stalked slowly. I watched as his shoes and dark shadow passed by my stall, feeling my breathing slow. Suddenly the man stopped walking, halting abruptly before turning around and stopping directly in front of the stall I was in. 

“I can smell your perfume Y/N, let me in.”

His tone never faltered, he was commanding me. I followed his orders, moving my arms forward, extending my delicate fingers to unlock the latch to the stall. The stall door creaked open, my eyes staring at the strong man who stood in front of me. His dark cyan collar shirt was unbuttoned slightly, exposing the delve in his chest. His cheetah print tie also hung loosely around his neck, his rolled up sleeves hugging his muscular forearms tightly. I drank in the sight, my drunken mind already swaying towards him. 

I heard him sigh, one hand massaging his temple as the other rested on his hip. I continued to stare, my mouth parted, my eyes clouded and my mind foggy. 

“God, Y/N… Okay, come on angel, let me help you, yeah?”

He walked closer to me, his buff build barely fitting in the narrow stall. He extended his arms, both hands on either of my shoulder, trying to support me as he helped me up. My hands found my way to his shoulders, my manicured nails slightly pinching his skin through the fabric of his collared shirt.

"Please Nami~, I wan-na go home~"

My speech slurred even more as I struggled to talk. I could hear the coarseness in my voice, the strain as I forced my numb mouth to form words. I slumped into his shoulders as he reached around and grabbed my purse, holding it with his pinky. Nanami didn't say anything as he picked me up with his strong arms, carrying me out of the bathroom and back into the club. The music blaring out of the speakers louder than before, or was I just imagining that?

I felt him shuffle through the crowd, covering me with his body, keeping me from being seen or touched. As he reached the exit he nodded to the bouncer and walked out. The doors of the club opened and the crisp city air hit me hard, it was cold, as opposed to the inside of the club that was sweltering. I shivered, my feverish body still sweating, most likely a symptom of the borderlines alcohol poisoning I had given myself.

Nanami only looked down at me, his brows furrowed, as if he was concerned for me. He shook off the look as he crossed the busy city street to get to his car, setting me down for a quick moment as he unlocked his car and opened the passenger door. Seating me swiftly and buckling me in, taking off my shoes to provide me with some kind of comfort.

I heard the driver door open and then slam once Nanami got in. He buckled his seatbelt and then started the car, I felt the rumble of the engine rise through my core and into my ears. My head getting dizzy off of the new car smell, he always kept his car pristine. Nanami pulled out of the busy parking spot and onto the street, keeping one hand on the wheel and the other on the shift stick. Staying quiet until they were on the highway, he finally parted his lips to speak.

"What were you thinking?"

His tone was calm, it was almost scary. He remained cold and stoic as he spoke, trying not to let his emotions get the better of him, but I knew he was struggling. The whites of his knuckles as he gripped the wheel told me better, his tense muscles and gritted teeth told me better. I knew better. So I sat quietly, trying to slow my heart rate and even my ragged breaths.

"Did you even have anyone with you? Why didn't anyone think to cut you off? You look like a mess Y/N, sound like one too. It's almost 3:00 in the morning."

He cut himself off, sighing and raising his hand to one against massage his temple. I looked at him, his face tense and his jaw tight. He gripped the wheel tightly, excising his frustration on it as if the wheel was the root of all of his emotion. I parted my mouth, trying to speak. I wanted to say something to reassure him that I was fine.

"I was with some friends, women from my work. I drank more than I could handle. I only wanted to celebrate with them Nami, I am sorry."

I was sure he could hear the slight pout in my expression as I spoke. The tension in the air hung heavy between us, it was awkward since we hadn't spoken in so long. Ever since his promotion he had been working a lot more which meant we parted a little. We were only colleagues at most but it was still hurting me that he didn't even care to check in on me here and there.

When I had gotten my promotion he did not even congratulate me, he most likely didn't even know. However, it didn't even matter anymore, the celebratory night had ended in disaster, and I was wasted.

I looked over to see that his face had softened, his brows were still furrowed but his eyes looked filled with care.

"You should have called me sooner Y/N, you know I would have dropped everything for you."

My mouth parted slightly, taking in a small gasp, expressing my shock at his words. It was unlike him to be this blunt. My heart softened yet my face contorted into one of bitterness, still hurting from his actions. How could he say that yet do the complete opposite.

"You're a liar! You barely talked to me after you left. I know you were busy but were you really too busy to even send me a small text?"

I sat up in the seat, pulling my knees under me so that I could be facing him as I sat. I continued in my verbal assault to his character.

"You don't even know what I was celebrating."

He glanced at me, only for a moment, but when he saw the pout on my face and my visibly upset expression his chest expanded. He was feeling guilty. He adjusted himself in his seat and cleared his throat, turning his attention back to the road once again. He took a deep breath before responding to me.

"Y/N, you know better than anyone that I care about you and I will always be honest with you. I had always tried to put you first but my work was beginning to become cumbersome, and the more I saw you grow the more I felt like I was becoming an anchor. How do you think I felt when as soon as I left on promotion you got promoted as well? I was proud, beyond proud, but I felt the reason you hadn't been promoted sooner was because of me."

He spoke softly, his voice dying down into a smooth and gentle wave that washed over me. His muscles flexed as he turned the wheel, turning into his neighborhood. I stared at him, not knowing what to say. I looked down, a little ashamed at my words. I hadn't even known the entire story and had just accused him of being cold-hearted.

"I-, I had no idea. Why? Why would you even think that? I was always so smitten with you. I always tried to tell you or show you that I liked you but I thought that you just weren't interested."

I saw him smile a little as he pulled into his driveway, looking at me with an expression of slight disbelief. I smiled back at him dumbly, bringing up my hand to try and cover my smile.

"You liked me?"

My face flushed even more and somehow my body got hotter. I smacked him playfully, giggling as I did so.

"How did you not know? I literally made it so obvious."

He chuckled, a deep rumble erupting from his chest as he moved to turn off the parked car. He took off his seatbelt and opened the car door, walking to my side and opening that door as well before unbuckling my seatbelt. He lifted me in his strong arms with ease, shutting the door and then locking his car.

"You should have just told me, I liked you too but I tried not to show it. I thought you were just being nice."

My head was flying, the intoxication fading slightly and giving me a pleasurable high. I giggled into his shoulder as he walked with me in his arms. He removed one of his arms and dug around for his keys, grabbing them and then unlocking the door.

"Well, you know now~."

I said as he helped me inside his home, removing my shoes and putting them to the side.

"I do,"

He said calmly, I felt the tremor in his voice as he spoke. It rose from my tummy and to my heart. He set me down on the floor, my toes touching the floor before my heel, my feet resting flat against the ground. His large hands rested at my hips as my hands rested at his shoulders.

I felt the tension of the moment, his soft lips looking so kissable. I leaned in closer, moving my hand to the back of his neck while standing on my tippy toes. Trying to inch in close enough to finally feel him against my lips.

"Y/N, I brought you here to make sure that you don't get alcohol poisoning. I know you like me doll, but I would rather not take advantage of you while you're intoxicated."

He removed my hand from the back of his neck before he pulled me towards his couch, setting me down on the plush material. He took a step back, loosening his tie even more and running his fingers through his hair. I drooled over him, staring at him with hungry eyes.

"Please, Nami? I'm sober enough, I won't regret it I know that I won't."

He froze as he heard my voice, I was basically begging for him to fuck me. I had wanted him for so long and I finally had a chance to have him; and he was containing himself simply because I was a little inebriated?

He shook his head as he glared at me, lust beginning to cloud over his eyes. I was sure that almost everything was still exposed. The short black dress barely covered anything. I leaned over the side of the couch, my cleavage basically spilling out as I did so.

"Y/N, you don't even know what you are asking me to do. Please just get some rest. We can talk about this in the morning."

He said to me as he pulled a blanket from a little linen closet in the hall. He walked towards me and began trying to tuck me in, I moved my arm, tugging at his shirt. My eyes staring at his, silently pleading with him. I once again pursed me lips, clutching at his shirt with my manicured nails.

"Y/N, please, you know how hard it is for me to stop myself from indulging in you."

His voice came out a breathless whisper, his breath fanning on my face as he slowly inched closer.

"Please indulge in me Nami~."

I whimpered out before his resolve finally crumbled. His lips melted into mine, his hand holding my waist while the other held my neck steady. He tilted his head, his tongue asking for entrance, I gladly let him in; his tongue began to prod at my cheeks and tongue, gently entangling himself with me. He was such a gentlemen.

He began leaving sloppy wet kisses down my jaw to my neck and chest. The wet sound of the contact gracing my ears with each passionate peck. I tangled both of my hands in his blonde hair, moaning as he continued to litter me in love marks.

"You're so pretty, all laid out for me, my sweet girl."

He cooed as he moved lower, slipping my dress over my thighs and tummy to reveal my pastel pink lace panties. He kissed my tummy and moved at a torturingly slow pace, stopping at the band of my panties. I whined at the loss of contact, his warm lips being replaced by the cold air.

He settled his face between my legs, moving back on the couch. He used his fingers to rub small circles at my entrance through my panties. The already damp spot spreading and soaking my panties even more.

"Awww, my pretty girl's already so wet for me."

He said as he pushed my panties to the side, pushing a finger in with ease. I was so wet that it just glided in, I heard the lewd squelching sounds coming from my pussy as he moved his finger in and out of me. His brows furrowed as he eyed my pussy, watching the way I swallowed his fingers hungrily.

"God, Y/N."

He removed his fingers and began to tease me, dragging his fingers lightly over the band of my panties, watching as I bucked my hips into him. He chuckled before finally taking off my panties.

I watched as lowered himself towards my sex, his eyes making contact with mine as he licked a long fat strip over my entrance and clit. I shuddered, my eyes rolling back as I moaned loudly. The lustful glint in his eyes was hard to miss.

"Nami, please~, more please more."

I need him so badly, my head was spinning from the high he was giving me. I lifted my hand and bit on one of my nails, my brows furrowing as I watched him go down on me. I felt his tongue darting out, lapping at my clit while curling his two fingers inside of me.

I cried out for him, my release already building in the pit of my stomach. He felt me tightening around his fingers, the way my moans became more desperate. The way I ground back against his tongue becoming more frantic.

"Nami, I'm gonna-aa~."

He pulled away immediately, denying me my release. I looked at him, tears brimming around my eyes, my chest heaving. My fluid glistened on his chin as he licked his fingers, tasting me. I sat up on the couch, moving myself towards him, forcing him to sit on the couch as I straddled him in between my legs.

"Y/N, what are y-?"

My wet pussy stained his beige pants, I felt his bulge poking at my clit. I kissed him while grinding down on it, the delicious feeling erupting in my tummy once again. One of his hands grabbed my waist, pushing me down further on his member while the other grabbed my hair, deepening the kiss. I pulled away, gasping for air, my lips bruised and swollen.

"Please fuck me."

I whispered breathlessly; I felt his chest heave underneath me as I pressed my hands against his pecs. He lifted me with him as he stood, setting me down on my feet as he looked into my eyes. Half-lidded as he seductively unbuckled his pants; unzipping them then tossing them somewhere in the living room. He removed his shirt as well, he walked towards me, pulling the top of my dress down to expose my cleavage.

My nipples perky and hard as he took one in his mouth, suckling on the supple flesh. I let out a whimper, palming his hard on through his boxers. I felt how big he was, the girth of his cock straining against him because of the tight boxers. I felt his tip, precut already leaking and staining his boxers.

I knelt down to take his boxers off, his length slapping my face as it was finally freed from its confine. He stared down at me, mouth parted, muscles flexing and tense as his dick twitched.

"ah-fuck"

I grabbed it in my hand, giving soft strokes before taking a long lick, from the base of his cock all the way to the slit of his tip.

He shuddered underneath my touch, his hand finding purchase in my hair as he tugged lightly. I put his tip in my mouth, sucking slowly, hollowing out my cheeks as I began bobbing my head.

"Take my cock, just like that."

I spit and sucked, taking in as much of his cock as I could. Trying to stuff my mouth full of his cock. He eventually began fucking my face. Planting his hands on either side of my head and shoving my mouth onto his dick, forcing me to take all of him. I gagged and choked, sputtering on his member as he continued his ministrations.

"You're such a fucking slut, slobbering on my cock like a good little bitch."

My heart throbbed as he finally pulled himself out of me, his words made my heart flutter. It seemed so wrong but felt so good.

He lifted me up, placing me on the couch, leaning over me in a missionary position. He teased my entrance with the head of his cock, I felt my inside tighten around nothing as he slid his head over my clit over and over.

"Nami! Please, please just fuck me, give me what I want."

He leaned his forehead against mine, our sweat mingling together as he gave me a kiss on my lips.

"You're that desperate? Shh sweetheart, it's okay. I'm here don't worry, I'll fuck you good my baby."

His tip pushed through my entrance, I cried out, my hands flying to clutch at his shoulders.

"haaa~ Nami!~"

He was so big, he was barely inside of me and I was already crying from how good it felt. I felt his gaze on me, a smirk playing on his lips as he slid all the way in. He breathed heavily, moaning gruffly from the feeling of me squeezing around him.

"fuck- you're so tight-'

He moaned as he began to move, his hips slamming into me at a slow pace. He stared at my tits, watching them bounce back and forth as he continued to fuck me. He took one of his hands and began to massage my clit gently. Rubbing slow circles over it. I was seeing stars.

"F-faster please nami~ I wanna cumm~"

I moaned out, he obliged to my request, sliding forward and forcing himself deeper. He began pounding into me mercilessly, I heard the lewd slapping of skin against skin echo throughout his living room. His moans and huffs spurred me on as I neared my climax.

"You wanna cum for me? hm, pretty girl?"

A mumble of 'yes' tumbled out of mouth repetitively, he only went faster, edging me closer towards my release. His thumb rolled over my clit again and I released all over him, my juices squirting out onto his abdomen and dribbling down his thighs.

"fuck fuck fuck-"

I quivered as he held my hips steady, fucking me through my high. His breath became heavy, I could tell he was nearing his end as well.

"Such a messy girl, this cock making you go stupid?"

My mind turned into mush. It was like he was mocking me while making me go dumb on his cock. He knew what he was doing. My tongue lolled out of mouth as my eyes rolled to the back of my head. I couldn't even form a sentence at this point, let alone try and protest against him, I knew he was right.

My hands reach out, my eyes struggling to maintain eye contact with him.

"fuck- I'm about to cum"

His strokes became more frantic, his steady rhythm losing pace. I locked my legs around him, trying to make sure that he came inside. I mustered up the last bit of coherency my brain could form.

"d-don't pull out"

I heard his chest rumble with a laugh, as he took a good look at my fucked out expression. "You serious?"

I only nodded my head, egging him on, I wanted him to finish inside of me. He continued to fuck me, finally reaching his climax. I felt thick ropes of cum shoot into me as he bottomed out in me. He was balls deep, his head twitching inside of me as he emptied everything he had.

I couldn't even tell what happened next, I was already out cold on his couch. Blissful and happy from the night.

--A/N - if you have managed to make it this far, thank you for reading and if you do not like it then please offer me suggestions on what to write about and what I could do differently. I tried my best but as I said it is my first smut. I am sorry if it seems a little rushed.

[heavenlyvixen]

Percy

I want to address the allegations and scandal that has engulfed Percy Hynes White. As a survivor of SA, I take all allegations seriously and give all accusers the benefit of the doubt. When I was first made aware of these allegations my heart dropped into my stomach, and I felt the first stirrings of panic rise. My own experiences make me specially sensitive when these things occur. You could say I’m triggered. I logged off for my own mental and emotional well being. Once I calmed down, I logged back on and went to read the allegations. I didn’t want to believe that Percy was capable of such a thing, but as someone who believes victims first, I was open to the possibility that this kid I thought was charming, funny and sweet was an illusion and the reality was that a monster lurked beneath the surface. However, as I began to read through the tweets and “evidence” against this man, something didn’t add up.

That’s when the anger kicked in. Do you know how insulting it is, as a survivor of rape, when girls make false allegations? Do you know the damage that it does to legitimate victims? The likely hood that they will receive justice falls even lower than it already was. It is a further violation committed against us. And there is no justification.

So over the last few days we have learned that Percy himself committed no crimes - he did not SA anyone. We’ve learned that at worst, while a teen, he was cavalier with a girl’s feelings. Not kind, but if we are to believe this is true, he also apologised when older and wiser. We have learned that when he learnt that a friend of his was capable of such horror, he ended the friendship and he was kind and compassionate to the victim.

When all that came to light, his accusers tried another avenue to smear him - they called him a racist. Their evidence? A video of a very young Percy quoting a tv show. The line happened to contain a slur. Stupid, but I think forgivable considering his age at the time. But that’s not all, according to the girls, they also offered instagram likes as proof. Problem is, the post they referenced, was not what they claimed. And don’t even get me started on his supposed twitter likes. He doesn’t even have a twitter account.

Then they tried another route - kink shaming. Again, they posted unverifiable “proof” that he liked some kinky stuff. Ok, that’s not a crime first of all. And second, fantasies and exploration of your sexuality is normal. There is nothing wrong with that except the fact that these girls violated Percy’s privacy by telling everyone.

Were they done? No. Not even. They released naked and risqué pictures of Percy that they claim he sent to them as proof of bad acts. We have a few problems with that. 1) they offer no proof that he sent them to them, just the pictures themselves, which begs the question “how did they really get them?”. 2) revenge porn is a crime, but sending the pics to them in and of itself is not. Especially if they had a sexual relationship with him at the time. 3) this is the really disgusting part. Percy appears to have been 13 years old when some of those pictures were taken. That classifies as child p*rnography and most certainly is a crime. A vile, horrific crime.

Throughout all of this, all anyone has proven is that one girl was possibly assaulted by someone that Percy knew. He reacted with shock but kindness when he found out. As to be expected. But most of all, we learned that Percy is the victim here. And we learned that there are many among us that are more vile than I ever feared.

He’s a victim of vindictive little girls who held on to images they never should have had to justify false allegations in an attempt to ruin his life because he didn’t reciprocate their affections.

This is fucking sick. It makes me sick, it pisses me off and makes my heart break for every true victim of SA, for Percy, and for his real friends and loved ones.

I hope that the people responsible face the consequences of their actions. And I finish with one final point. There is no justification in this world for spreading child p*rnography. None. There is no justification for falsely accusing an innocent person of vile crimes. None. Those involved should be ashamed of themselves.

I hope and pray that Percy is being taken care of, that he’s ok and that he is able to return to some semblance of normalcy when it all dies down and the air clears. The reality is he’ll be irrevocably changed by this. I just hope it doesn’t change him too much. I hope he emerges from this still kind, goofy and adorably weird. Take care, Percy and know that we are on your side.

[evansboyfriend]

ok im ignoring my adult responsibilities because i am a tired sleepy girl today and writing isnt happening and i've been on twitter and

the most baffling thing is the b*ddies/antis insistence that tommy is WRONG and BAD for buck, when in fact, canon has shown us time and time again that buck is crazy about tommy. he's so heart eyes. he's so smitten.

let's revisit some CANON facts, shall we?

he explicitly says he called tommy and asked for the habror tour because he wanted to get to know tommy ✓

he said "that guy is cool i like that guy" referring to tommy, to his face ✓

he said he was trying to get tommy's attention because he likes tommy and he wants tommy to notice him, to like him ✓

he said "i can't stop thinking about him [tommy]" to eddie after he had the opportunity to come out to eddie when he felt comfortable and prepared to do so ✓

when he was so upset about ruining the date by acting like a fool and asking maddie for advice because he doesn't want it to end there! he likes the hot pilot! he feels back for panic-shoving him back into the closet by overcompensating with those cringe-ass ridiculous comments (when tommy had already told eddie that they're just hanging out, grabbing a bite, going to a movie. bros being bros) ✓

he called tommy and asked him to meet him at the cafe and apologised for his foolish behaviour because he 100% acted like a fool ✓

even after tommy says "you dont need to apologise" "you didn't behave badly" "i ended the date early because i didnt want to pressure you" buck insists he acted badly and wants to apologise to tommy. BECAUSE HE CARES ABOUT TOMMY. HE DOESNT WANT TOMMY TO THINK HE'S AN ASSHOLE. ✓

he invited tommy to be his date to the madney wedding and insisted he come, throwing excuses at him like "there's free food! (please come) you know half the people there (please come) my sister wants to meet you (please come) i need someone to dance with (please please please)" ✓

his face literally lights up when tommy shows up at the bachelor party he's walking towards tommy with his arms wide open like HUG ME HUG ME ✓

he looks tommy up and down and calls him a beast and proceeds to eat his face in the hospital lobby surrounded by other patients and nurses etc. his man showed up to be his date to a disaster wedding happening in a hospital room and buck went NUTS about him ✓

the way he looks like a proud boyfriend when tommy is getting the medal ✓

the way he's ready to bite gerrards head off for implicitly calling tommy a gay slur ✓

the way he's shamelessly flirting with tommy while they're having a lowkey dinner together at his place and the look on his face like he was about to pounce on him ✓

THERE'S ALL THIS! IT'S LIKE! THERE'S ALL THESE THINGS BUCK HAS SAID AND DONE THAT SHOW HOW MUCH HE LIKES TOMMY! THE WAY HE LOOKS AT TOMMY, THE WAY HE'S SMILING LIKE 90% OF THE TIME HE'S WITH TOMMY! IT'S UNDISPUTABLE!

but they have to insist that tommy is problematic, that he's wrong for buck, he's a bad person, because, what? buck doesn't have the capacity to judge for himself whether the guy he's fucking is right for him or not? he's wrong to be head over heels & horny for his hot pilot boyfriend? like he's not a grown ass man making decisions for himself for who to date and who to fuck and who to bring as his plus one to important events and who to go home to after a long stressful day?

if you love evan buckley so much, why are you taking away his agency like that?

[lemotmo]

I am…

So annoyed right now.

*those* people just successfully bullied Whitney off Twitter. She did say she will be back in time for all the shows to start up this month. But it’s disgusting she even feels the need to leave in the first place. But I can’t even blame her because They have been attacking her, mocking her, insulting her. Literally called her unprofessional for saying bestie boo and then in the same breath claimed they would be “reclaiming it” from her and have been using it in every post they all make to mock not only her but every other fan as well.

She responded once with a I’m sorry you didn’t like my article and felt the need to respond this way instead of blocking me, and they immediately switched it up to how dare she respond back like that and sick her buddie army on us all! We did nothing wrong!

Do they want a reaction? Yes. Should we give it to them? No. But when is enough enough. Like we block them all day long. But we *still* have to deal with what they’re doing and saying regardless. And when they go and bully a WOC journalist to the point she feels she needs to leave, just because she doesn’t ship the same fictional character they do?? Like that’s not ok.

I am glad Tim is back in charge of the show. I really am. But i honestly and truly hope that he has bringing *him* back to the show as one of his biggest regrets for the rest of his life. Especially after doing so has made the rest of the fans that love this show have to be constantly attacked, harassed, have slurs thrown at them, and you name it daily because of it.

Just leaving this here.

F*ck this. This is appalling. All this over a TV-show?

I think we can all relate to the Nonny. 🙄😒

This is all I'm posting about this. I refuse to give them anymore attention.

Please do not reblog this. Just 'like'! I have no desire to become the focal point of some of these people. Once was more than enough. Thank you.

[quakinqueer]

This whole situation is so overblown its insane. People are interperting his words as being passive agressive when he is very obviously confused and scared. Also you thinking he is going to victimise himself says a lot about how you already felt about him before this whole thing. But he is gonna prove you wrong by owning up to it.

Genuinely found this a little amusing so I wanted to respond to it. Got a little yappy with it, woops.

"This whole... overblown it's insane"

while I do agree that some folks on twt are taking it too far with hating on him, I also think the majority are rightfully holding him accountable for some very stupid things he did, and that the people defending him are actually acting significantly more abhorrent and disrespectful, calling the op of the original tweet slurs and sending them death threats. THAT is insane, overblown, and frankly disgusting, not the people expressing anger and disappointment with him, a public figure, for severely mishandling a serious situation.

"... when he is very obviously confused and scared."

I- confused and scared??? geez what is he a cornered puppy? He's a grown ass adult man who should know better than to immediately act on emotion like that. I will however take into account that he is ND, and that affects your impulse control and how you process your emotions. I'll also acquiesce that many of his initial responses do read to me as panicked, knee-jerk responses, and that he wasn't entirely thinking straight when he reacted that way. But to call this grown, adult, privileged white man who frankly had and has all the power in this situation "confused and scared" all because of some online discourse and Twitter dogpiling is downright silly.

I'll be the first to admit he's probably extremely stressed, honestly I personally suspect he probably had something close to a panic attack around when this was happening (just my speculation). That doesn't mean that he didn't mess up. That doesn't erase the effect his impertinence had on op and the community. I'm just hoping once he's had time to calm down, he'll handle this better.

"Also you thinking he is going to victimise himself says a lot about how you already felt about him before this whole thing."

This was the funniest part to me. I'm just gonna leave some screenshots of tweets I made as the situation was happening.

Hope this gives you all you need to know.

And lastly: "But he is gonna prove you wrong by owning up to it."

My brother (or sibling) in Allah, that's all I could possibly want. That is quite literally all I'm hoping for. The reason I was so cynical in that draft is because I don't want to get my hopes up or raise my expectations too high, if only to avoid any extra hurt. Putting someone on a pedestal and idealizing reality is what got me in this whole overly-emotional, devastated state that I'm in currently. I want to believe in him so badly, I just don't want to be let down again.

We'll see how it goes.

[fairlith]

TW: Eating disorders, unaliving ideation, abuse

My experience with fandom:

I just saw this on Instagram, and again the whole Chappell Roan discourse is really making me think of when the Portal musical went viral and derailed my career by making my self-esteem so bad I considered some options too triggering to spell out here.

I was attacked for my singing voice and my acting and my ideas and my writing... unless it involved cute boys. I wrote and directed and designed the cores, but people acted like they just emerged from heaven one day. GLaDOS was my fault and people hated me. Everything else that they liked was somehow separate.

Most of all I was AND STILL AM REGULARLY attacked for my weight. I haven't done more than skim the comments on the Portal musical in years. It's really bad for my mental health. Publicly, I've been like, 'she's a computer, who cares what she weighs, haha' and waved it off, but in reality it gave me a fairly bad problem with binge-eating and stopping auditioning for literally anything. I have not auditioned for one single thing since all that happened. I gave up. My self-confidence is shot. I go to therapy, I've just never gotten enthusiastic about putting myself out there again.

If I used the word 'queer', people invasively demanded I publicly declare if I knew I was using a slur, because they knew I was a straight lady, because I hadn't featured their favourite pairing in the musical. I don't like that pairing. It's not canon. There are no canon pairings in the game. People called me homophobic A LOT.

I have an ex-wife. I am queer as Hell.

I had been in an abusive relationship with my mother, and then with a series of men, so I wrote the show as an allegory about how being abused can make you a broken person who hurts others.

In my story, I worked hard on my mental health. In GLaDOS' story, she isolates herself so she doesn't hurt anybody anymore. Sad.

I was accused of being ableist for not including Doug Rattman in the original production. HE'S DEAD in the game... But rather than keep getting hate mail, I tried to accommodate and put him in the second production.

People started trying to reach me through personal social media if I ignored their nasty/weird messages. So ignoring didn't work. If I responded when tagged in hate, then I was also in the wrong.

Don't get me wrong, plenty of people were nice, but the YouTube comments especially outweighed those voices.

The wild thing was... the Portal musical has MILLIONS of views, and very few of its fans ever supported the company with a donation or buying a cast recording I saved up to make. People stole the ONE DOLLAR cast recording and put it on YouTube. So I was famous enough for people to CONSTANTLY tag me in hate and tell me I was homophobic, that the musical wasn't good, that I'm fat, ugly, can't act, and can't sing... But I wasn't famous enough to make almost any money off it, so it felt like the only way to encourage my career to change in a way that would help me survive off it was to make myself available to people.

The viral success never translated into any sort of monetary value, and eventually I couldn't afford to do weird fandom art for 80 hours a week for waaaay below minimum wage.

I saved up to pay for that musical and paid everyone who participated out of the profits. And again, people were attacking me over a for-fun art project. I don't mean that resentfully, exactly, but Chappell Roan has riches. I had nothing. I gradually retreated from the public eye and tried to post less to YouTube and disabled comments often when I did.

When I complained about how people treated me online, I was accused of playing 'victim'. People bullied me until I deactivated the theatre company's tumblr, then bullied me for doing that, so I deleted it, so someone took it so they could make fun of me on the old url. People tagged me in hate and when I responded, they would make fun of me for that. Someone started a Twitter impersonating me and putting nasty words in my mouth.

People were harassing a person who regularly has 80 bucks or less in chequing as an independent artist as if I was a 'real' famous person with anything else going for me. My resources were VERY limited. The Portal musical had seven performances (including one concert) in two years.

That every single piece of discourse on Chappell Roan hating fame has had TONS of comments about how selfish she is has been actually weirdly/very triggering for me. I know now that giving up on my dream and not trying to push Geekenders or my personal theatre art further was the right call, because, as I am very autistic, I'm very certain I would have hated even a lick of real fame. I sure hated what happened with my silly little fanfic musical.

I don't expect anyone to really see this, but it was nice to write it. The Chappell Roan discourse is triggering. It makes me really sad.

That's all.

...I really need a journaling outlet. Maybe this tumblr'll be that.

[batpoisonz]

My experience as a 2S gaybian:

Before all this, I was exclusive to "contradictory" labels all the way up until early 2023. I then labeled myself as an mspec lesbian, because as a 2S person, my gender and sexuality are impacted by my cultural experiences way beyond that of someone's binary thinking. Most white transphobes couldn't even comprehend my experiences with me being 2S.

When I was exclu; it was simply just my own ignorance. I was influenced by those around me who did not understand the labels themselves. I listened to their arguments and at the time it made sense. Until inclu people came by and explained the labels to me.

I was the only one in my friend group who sat down to have a discussion with these people. and their arguments made even more sense and disputed all the arguments my friends came up with!! It was an insane and confusing experience. When you want to be loyal to your friends but something they do is just so morally wrong, you wouldn't know what to do either!

This is where I start to understand, and when I started to become critical of both sides. I thought exclu people were "radical" as well, but being "radinclu" simply just wasn't "radical" to me just for including queer people in the QUEER community, ya know?

At the time even tho my stance was changing and developing, I still fought against mspec lesbians and gays; simply because I was scared of being an outcast, that I'd get harassed by exclu people, that people would be racist to me, etc etc. but I soon learned it was the complete opposite.

AS SOMEBODY WHO IS GAYBIAN, when I was exclu I experienced MASS AMOUNTS of racism; to the point I felt like I had to leave twitter (even after I made my account private). I had people questioning my validity as a native american simply because I was an ignorant homophobe.

Say it with me: IGNORANCE DOES NOT EXCUSE RACISM!!

I even had people calling me a chimp, a creature, I've been called a chimera, I got mass reported, I got called multiple racial slurs, of which not all I could even reclaim, I got called a hermaphrodite, way way more happened. my cc got filled with racism and homophobia too!! all because I was ignorant on the subject.

Not once did I call an inclu person (while I was exclu) any of these horrible things or harass them; I just blocked them and moved on with my day.

I will admit I was a bigot for sure but I would NEVER wish any of these things on anyone.

It doesn't stop there though. when I came out as gaybian, I lost almost ALL of my online friends. I also was closeted irl because I had people at my college getting VERY hostile whenever somebody mentioned you can be a bi lesbian.

Those same people were okay with the idea of being a biplatonic lesbian.

basically, my point here is that even as you evolve and grow as a person, become more accepting of not only others but also yourself; the queer community is extremely divided. Even IF everyone agreed that "contradictory" labels weren't an issue, it still wouldn't stop the heartless attacks we all get as queers on the daily. exclus said the SAME THING about neopronouns and xenogenders 7 years ago that they're saying about mspec lesbians and gays today. AND THAT'S A PROBLEM.

The US is climbing towards eradicating all of us as queers; starting with trans people, and they're slowly inching on towards homosexuality. People WITHIN the queer community are more concerned about how we label ourselves, when we all have our own unique oppression as queers, AND SHARED OPPRESSION AS WELL!!

I've legit heard people saying the hate crimes I've experienced as a gaybian don't actually exist and that I'm overreacting because my identity isn't real.

You know who gets the same thing told to THEM?

Most queers will hear that same quote; ESPECIALLY nonbinary people and trans people in general.

everyone who is queer, is queer. whether you "agree" with the labels or not. we are QUEER for a reason.

[brother-one]

[Twitter repost]

Just because something was the last straw for me today...

On Kainé's intersexuality:

A (long) post, from an intersex person to you 💛💜💛

First of all! Why am I making this post?

I hope it doesn't seem out of nowhere, but let's start bit by bit.

I am making it not because I'm mad at anyone, but because I genuinely want you all to learn about who Kaine as a person, how she can be interpreted, and most details that can be taken and associated to her intersexuality, from an intersex perspective. There's A LOT of things I want to address in this thread, not necessarily all of them negative, but I do think the NieR fandom as a whole needs to get educated on intersexuality.

I can't speak over every single intersex person, but I can give my insight on this.

Now, the first thing I want to address:

1- Kainé, intersexuality AND transness.

Why is this first? Well, because there's a really big issue hiding in plain sight here: Intersexism, and therefore intersex erasure.

First on this, a detail that a lot of you know about, and yet it's not even close to EVERYONE knowing it: The use of the word "hermaphrodite" for an intersex person. Even if it's widely accepted by people as a whole, it is a slur against intersex people and even if some DO reclaim it, its casual use is not correct whenever you employ it to refer to an intersex individual, be it fictional or not. Not only is it considered insensitive, but it's also heavily inaccurate whenever used to describe an intersex individual, even if it may be in fact accurate for, in this case, Kainé.

It is a word a lot of us are uncomfortable with, and seeing a character who is one of the very rare cases of representation being associated with it doesn't really make it better. Especially since being intersex isn't just about the genital differences, but hormonal differences and such. Anything that doesn't conform to the SEX binary is considered intersex, usually also known as hyperandrogenism. I've seen people frequently agreeing that even PCOS can be considered an intersex condition, so there's also that.

Next, is the reduction of Kainé to either a transgender woman, or a transfem individual.

While these headcanons are completely okay and I personally have never minded them, there is an issue hiding here too.

It seems that people either don't care enough about intersex issues to do proper research, or they're blissfully ignorant about general facts on intersexuality.

Some of these facts are:

- Intersexuality isn't a "third sex" or an in between.

- Intersexuality does not NECESSARILY have to do anything with one's gender identity.

- It is completely, and I repeat, COMPLETELY okay to just call someone "intersex".

- Not every intersex person is transgender. Cisgender intersex people exist.

- Even if trans people and intersex people may relate to the other in certain aspects, they're nowhere close to being the same, or to share the exact same experiences.

- Every intersex person experiences gender and life differently.

- There are many, and I say, MANY different intersex conditions.

- Intersexuality is way more frequent than you may think.

And many other facts, really, but they would pretty much need another entire, separate thread to be listed.

Now, where's the issue I want to approach here?

Explained simply to non-intersex people:

Turning a headcanon like trans Kainé into something so widespread not only gives a totally different idea of what her character is from the start, but also gives a place for intersexism to rise. It is a way to force us intersex people into conforming within a system, a binary that EXCLUDES US and always has from the start. Because yes, the current ideas of identity are wrongly still binary.

I thought Kainé was trans from the start. I thought it was extremely cool to have such representation, being also a fellow trans person myself. Then I discovered she's intersex.

Then, everything felt unfair.

To have such an idea of something, then discovering the reality is very different to that idea didn’t feel right. Not because transness is bad because, again, I am trans myself, but because that just feels like everyone is forcing her into transness, when it doesn't have to be like that.

Intersexuality and transness can coexist without problem, the problem only manifests itself when you do not give those two the opportunity to even try and coexist. It is already hard by itself to embrace your body as an intersex person, and personally topping that with transness only makes it more of a struggle. And yet, in the end, everyone's experiences, feelings and identity will always be different to one another. Intersex people can decide to stay as the gender they were assigned (keyword here being assigned) at birth, they can decide to transition (or maybe they could've transitioned way before discovering the fact they're intersex), and they can also decide to just be intergender.

Our experiences and relationship with our body, and the way we perceive ourselves may be similar to the one of, say, a perisex transgender individual, but there will always be a gap between both.

To finish up with the first point, the general objective with this:

I want you all to understand that, while trans people need representation, it's not okay to erase intersexuality or to try and make us fit into your concept of identity. Intersex people are already stigmatized enough, and the last thing we need is erasure. Our voices as a whole are already heavily ignored, so the least we can ask from you is to not erase us. You can keep your headcanons (I encourage so!), but PLEASE don't forget about Kainé's intersexuality. Intersex representation is extremely important and needed, even if the character’s intersexuality may not be handled in the best way sometimes.

In summary:

That is pretty much it for the first point. Now, on to the second:

2- Kainé and body dysphoria.

Here comes a very important part, too.

Some parts of her character and dialogue can be interpreted as dysphoria, and also as a way of showing rejection towards another aspect of her body, since it’s possessed by a shade.

A very important dialogue in the first fight against Hook that I originally interpreted as body dysphoria is:

“She gave me the strength to deal with this goddamn mutant body! Do you know how long I’ve been like this? How much I loathe myself?”

This dialogue has been in my mind ever since I first played. And I still strongly believe it can be interpreted as dysphoria, I just acquired a different perspective on it after finishing NIER and doing a dive into what she is, as a character. While I don’t believe I have the deepest understanding of her, I think I have the main aspects of her character clear.

No one in the world could understand her.

Yet another thing on her I believe is important, is this:

“A heart and body in constant conflict.

Now, and even if she may or may not have dysphoria, here’s something that I think should be spoken of way more often - the fact that dysphoria doesn’t make you transgender. Even if it may be considered necessary in order to get certain medical treatments in the case of trans people, having dysphoria doesn’t make you trans, and not having dysphoria doesn’t make you not trans, either.

And loneliness was eating her alive.”

Because while it may not be part of, say, a main storyline game, if we talk about NieR (it comes from SINoALICE!), it does give us a really interesting sight into her. Even if it may probably refer to her struggle as being possessed, it sounds very familiar to the experience I know as dysphoria.

Kainé’s hatred for her body exists in a way where many reasons for it overlap. I think it could be narrowed down and represented like this:

I think it’s very important to note that Kainé, as a gestalt, wasn’t intersex. Somewhere in the process there was an error that made Kainé, as a replicant, intersex. Which doesn’t sound very good, if you think about it, but it gives you room to think about Kainé a bit differently.

Which takes us to my third (and probably last) point:

3- Kainé and identity.

Carrying on from a detail in the last point, we can see a clear, yet maybe not intentional mistake in her writing. The error of her becoming intersex.

While it can be read as intersexism, it is also rather understandable - mistakes and errors happen, especially if we talk about literally separating soul from body, and considering the fact that there were more defects in the transformation process too. Another very important fact that comes into picture is the different ‘generations’ of replicants, and the way that there have been multiple Kainés over time. So probably, since the system was already long-running by that point, that could be the reason for it.

Still, if we’re taking it the intersexism way - we have to understand that it is not and it will NEVER be caused by some kind of “error” or mistake, even if people have chosen to see it that way for a long time now. It is not an inconvenience nor is it something not meant to happen. It IS meant to happen, and there is much evidence that sex is variant - could go from slight differences, to more “noticeable” ones. Not just in humans, but in animals too.

People want to change something that just happens, that always has. In here, I beg you to take into account the fact that intersex CHILDREN are forced to go through surgeries to make them fit into the sex binary. Children are bullied, hated and seen as freaks just because they were born different. 

Sounds terrible, yes ? Well, thanks to this, many intersex people often feel more comfortable identifying as their own gender - intergender. Others stay cis, and others feel more identified with the term transgender.

Kainé is a hard to figure out case, since she had been and identified as a woman from the start, as much as she had been dehumanized or degraded by others. Because they didn’t even call her a man, for they didn’t think she was deserving of that. She wasn’t deserving of a gender - she was a freak, and that was all of it. Though it is a struggle that a lot of trans people go through too, for intersex people it often comes from society as a whole.

The rejection intersex people go through is there from birth, and the eagerness from others (who don’t even have the right) to change it is too. And as much as it follows us through life, as similar as it may be to trans struggles, it is not and it will never be the same.

For that, trans and intersex people have to stand together, but sometimes that feels like too much to ask of the community.

Because intersex people, much like ace or aro people, are often ignored in queer spaces (or not considered at all, for that matter). It is harsh.

But then there are the intersex trans people, who use both terms. The cis intersex people, the intergender people, the intersex people who chose not to bother with gender…

So that is, too, one reason why lots of intersex individuals choose to not call themselves trans, as much as they may identify with the term. Or the complete opposite, choosing to present themselves as transgender, as to not have to bear with the load that is being intersex sometimes.

After some time of knowing her, I think canon Kainé fits into the cis intersex category by a lot - considering she has always identified and KNOWN she is a woman. But of course, that is canon.

You are free not to, I can’t stop you. But I think that, if you’re perisex and trans, it shows the way you are with the people who have stood with you since always. To not recognize our existence is to not recognize a part of what brought all of us trans people to where we are.

My headcanon? Trans, intersex woman. Not hard or complicated, is it ?

And that is the way it should be, if you want to listen to intersex people. To listen to our voices.

So, please, if you care about us - don’t take away from intersex people what we have struggled so much to even get.

To close this thread, I just have to say: Thank you for reading, I hope you could at least learn something or get a bit of perspective on to what being an intersex person is like, and a bit of interpretation about Kainé from one.

If you want to go ahead and follow what I’ve said on it, you have a forever thanks from me. Happy pride month guys <3

[certified-msher]

Here are Michael and Gavin's responses to Kdin's post. Gavin's response is listed in black and Michael's in white. IDs under break.

For those of you who haven't seen it here's the link to the TwitLonger or you can find it on her tumblr:

ID for Gavin's response:

Today, Kdin continued an important conversation that I've referred to vaguely in the past and rather than tweet something vague or just attempt to push forward, today I want to stop and take full responsibility for my past behaviour at Rooster Teeth. Firstly, I don't want anything I say here to be construed as an excuse - there simply aren't any excuses for my past behaviour. In the past I certainly played a role in other people's unhappiness with my shit attempts at humor and I look back on these moments with disgust in myself. I'm absolutely shocked by what i used to think could pass as comedy or "just joking around". I used to think that I could say or do offensive things because those around me knew it was beyond absurd that I would actually speak that way - basically the intent was to shock and the content of my character would excuse it - I couldn't have been more wrong and I fully acknowledge how stupid and hurtful that way of think was. Before Kdin bravely came out and transitioned, I did use that horrifically offensive nickname - it didn't matter that I was under the impression that we were all in on a joke - it was hurtful and wrong. Full stop. I would never use that kind of language in any context today, but again, that doesn't excuse my behaviour and I completely acknowledge that. In the years since, I've tried my absolute best to grow as a human being and would never, ever behave in this manner now - again, I'm beyond ashamed when I think back and I am forever grateful to the amazing individuals like Kdin who have shown me more grace than I was ever deserving of as I've worked to put my hurtful behaviour behind me.

ID for Michael's response:

I'll keep this as short as possible. The simple answer is I grew up in a place and time when calling your friends explicit words or slurs was funny. It was just part of modern culture. Primetime tv shows and movies I watched did it and it was always used as comedy. It was a punchline in The Hangover movie and everyone loved it. The f* word was something I would say to anyone without blinking. It was "normal" and in fact there's just simply never a reason at all to say it. I've long since regretted knowing my words hurt Kdin in such an unintended way. I also need to point out that this was years before Kdin transitioned, not that it's any excuse of makes anything less hurtful but it was certainly not said in the context of any form of hate or violence. A few years ago I reached out to Kdin to tell her how sorry I was and how bad I felt and that I never intended it to inflict the harm that I clearly did. Kdin was kind enough to respond when they didn't have to and have a conversation with me. So that's my comment. I definitely used to have a lot of shittier habits and behaviors and I deeply regret that really hurt someone. It was only ever a place of edgelord comedy and pushing buttons but it's not an excuse. I am sorry. I did grow up. I was stupid and lacked empathy and it's something I try to improve on every day because I'm human.

[coochiequeens]

Personally, I don't want to live in a world where little boys playing with dolls and little girls who don't like wearing pink are subjected to lifelong medical intervention because lunatics think these kids are in the wrong body. If that's the right side of history, then history can go f**k itself." - Graham Linehan

Stretched out on a hospital trolley after a surgeon had removed my cancer-riddled testicle, waiting for a doctor to give me the all-clear to go home, I lazily opened Twitter.

This was five years ago and, at this point, I had not quite nailed my colours to the gender-critical mast. I had defended women being smeared with the slur 'Terf' (for 'trans-exclusionary radical feminist') and was being monitored by trans activists as a result. This made me nervous, though I wasn't quite sure why.

I'd had an inkling of what I was up against when my wife Helen and I played a small part in repealing Ireland's draconian abortion laws. Working with Amnesty International, we appeared in a video in which Helen spoke of terminating a pregnancy because the foetus she was carrying had an abnormality which would have resulted in death moments after birth.

We tried to attend every protest and, at one event, I remember some strange person with a bullhorn bellowing out this nonsense: 'We want the state to pay for abortions!' [general cheering] '...and surgeries for trans people' [puzzled mumbling].

I felt uneasy. Sure, let's talk about trans rights, but first things first. We hadn't yet won the fight on abortion.

In retrospect, this was the first sign I had of the sleight of hand that would allow a sinister movement to attach itself to progressive causes and wrap itself in their stolen banners.

Then, when Ireland voted to overturn the abortion ban, Amnesty Ireland tweeted that this was a victory for 'pregnant people'. I was enraged.

My wife wasn't a 'pregnant person'. She was a woman, and a mother.

But these were only the first ripples of a gathering tsunami of madness. Online, people had started to go dangerously insane. It was such a slow process that I didn't notice it at first, but now, as I lay in hospital, I was collecting my thoughts on the subject.

I knew my positions were thought-through and sound, and I was sure that once people saw I was arguing in good faith, they'd see the problems with gender ideology and we could have a sensible, grown-up conversation about it.

I also told myself that, as co-writer of well-loved television sitcoms Father Ted and The IT Crowd, I had an audience out there who would listen to me. So I sent a few tweets carefully outlining my argument.

Meanwhile, I was in intense pain from the wound under my bandage and, when I was finally told I could go home, I couldn't stand up. A bed was found for me and I lay there, enjoying a bit of peace until the morphine wore off.

The visitors had gone and all was quiet. I decided to have a look at Twitter (now X).

My careful explanation of my position had certainly had an impact.

A trans activist and journalist called Parker Molloy, who identifies as a woman and is enraged if anyone disagrees, had sent me a number of increasingly frenzied direct messages.

After the third or fourth time telling Molloy I was in hospital, I ended the conversation. Meanwhile, another tweeter hopped into my replies to say, 'I wish the cancer had won'.

My ordeal had begun. Cast adrift, I was about to lose everything — my career, my marriage, my reputation.

A little bit after my brush with cancer, I brushed with something almost worse. A biological male, now going by the name Stephanie Hayden, was determined to wreck the life of anyone who flouted trans dogma.

A woman was arrested at home in front of her two young children and put in a prison cell for seven hours after she referred to Hayden on Twitter as a man.

When I made a public accusation about Hayden on X, Hayden didn't challenge it.

Instead, I was accused of breaking confidentiality by publicising Hayden's former male identities.

Hayden reported me to the police. The Guardian, whose editors seemed to have given up any pretence of being even-handed on this issue, published an article headlined 'Graham Linehan given police warning after complaint by transgender activist'.

It claimed I had been given a 'verbal harassment warning' by police acting on Hayden's complaint. This was untrue. I'd been phoned by a policeman who seemed confused when I told him that I'd blocked Hayden on Twitter months ago, so could hardly be accused of harassment.

The policeman then said something like 'stay away from her, awright?' and rang off.

For a national newspaper to headline this as a 'harassment warning' — a formal document that needs to be delivered in writing — was disgraceful, but typical of how many journalists liked to frame things that involved feminists and their allies.

After seven months of wrangling, the paper eventually removed the word 'harassment', which was too little, too late.

By then, the 'police warning' had morphed on social media into 'police caution' — which is issued where a crime has been committed and requires an admission of guilt, neither of which had happened. The false claim that I received a police caution for transphobia is constantly repeated to friends and colleagues to justify my cancellation. It was even presented to my publisher as a reason not to publish this book from which you are reading an extract. I found it grimly funny that the police and media were acting as reputation managers for a character like Hayden, but my wife Helen was terrified at being targeted in this way.

Hayden and Adrian Harrop, a Liverpool-based GP who was temporarily suspended from practising medicine as punishment for his aggression towards women on Twitter, trolled a Catholic journalist called Caroline Farrow, live-tweeting a visit to her home in a way that seemed designed to frighten and intimidate her.

She was about to travel to the U.S., but her visa was withdrawn. Harrop tweeted that he'd just visited the U.S. embassy in London: 'Consular staff very efficient at dealing with my important diplomatic business,' he wrote, with a wink emoji.

In a tweet, I called Harrop 'Doctor Do-Much-Harm'. The next morning, the police turned up at my door. I told them I wouldn't be changing my online behaviour one iota, and that Harrop bullied women online.

The policeman nodded, said something about free speech, and left. However, that visit wore heavily on my wife.

But the likes of Hayden and Harrop could not have had such success without accomplices in the police and the Press. It was surreal how swiftly they gained such power over society.

As for my career as a successful television scriptwriter, that proved to be over before the stitches from my cancer operation had healed.

Around this time, I received a letter from Sonia Friedman, one of the biggest theatre producers in London's West End, about me writing a new companion piece for the late Peter Shaffer's classic one-act farce Black Comedy.

I was apparently 'top of our dream list' to pen it.

Black Comedy is possibly the most ingenious farce ever written. I'd seen it years before with David Tennant in the lead and it left me giddy and envious. Now, going from lowly sitcom writer to being considered worthy of pairing with Shaffer had me floating.

Not for long, though. Only a few days later, Shaffer's estate decided on the late playwright's behalf that they 'didn't want to get involved' by 'taking one side or the other'.

More jobs began to fall away. A tour to Australia to teach comedy was cancelled because the company claimed it 'wouldn't be able to afford the security'. I discovered later this was a standard excuse given to those of us declared unclean by the new sacred class.

I'm also the person who worked with comedians Steve Martin and Martin Short for the shortest period of time. Five minutes, I think it was. A producer invited me to develop a comedy-drama TV series in which both would star. I had a flat-out offer and then, within minutes, an email from the same producer rescinding it, I suspect after a Twitter user in his office told him I was a bigot.

Even what I thought would be my pension was taken away from me. There were plans to make a musical of Father Ted, written and directed by me, which I was certain would be a huge hit, perhaps even make my fortune if I could get it right.

I hadn't reckoned how resolute the forces against me actually were, and how quiet my colleagues would be in the face of their onslaught. Sonia Friedman, the producer, told me I was 'on the wrong side of history' and advised me to 'stop talking'.

I suddenly found myself in a raging argument with this powerful woman who held my musical in her hands. But hearing one of these copy-and-pasted, thought-terminating clichés from the mouth of a colleague was more than I could bear.

Personally, I don't want to live in a world where little boys playing with dolls and little girls who don't like wearing pink are subjected to lifelong medical intervention because lunatics think these kids are in the wrong body. If that's the right side of history, then history can go f**k itself.

The meeting ended with each of us trying not to catch the other's eye in case it kicked off again.

I thought at least that Jimmy Mulville, the head of Hat Trick Productions, was on my side.

As the original producer of Father Ted, the company had a big stake in this new venture. But now the Hat Trick people began to go the other way.

I had another meeting around the supposed problem of my defending women and girls, in which, as always, no one could locate the flaw in my analysis as I explained over and over again: 'Children are being hurt. Women are losing their sports, their language, their privacy.'

Finally, I referred to the violent, terroristic nature of trans rights activism. Casually, off-handedly, Jimmy said: 'Well, there's bad behaviour on both sides.'

'Both sides' is a poisonous smear. No one on my side of the argument insists that people should be shunned by polite society. No one on our side wears T-shirts with slogans such as 'Kill all Terfs' and 'Die Terf Scum'.

I was told by one acquaintance: 'Some of the things you've done have been questionable.' 'Give me an example,' I replied. Long pause. 'All right, well maybe not.'

The final act was a meeting in the Hat Trick offices in which Jimmy told me I was to remove my name from Father Ted The Musical or he would not make the show — my show, which I had been tending, rewriting and refining for the best part of half a decade.

Once again, I asked what I was being accused of.

Jimmy rolled his eyes, as if it was self- evident. Desperately, I tried to explain what was happening to women's rights, and to the young girls mutilating themselves because of — 'I DON'T CARE!' Jimmy shouted. I left.

Later, I heard from my agent that in return for declaring me an unperson, Hat Trick was suggesting an up-front payment of £200,000 as an advance on my royalties. Initially, I agreed to go along with it, because I needed the money. But then I changed my mind.

I saw an interview with the mother of one of the women competitors who found themselves up against the trans swimmer Lia Thomas.

Lia was still physically intact and all the girls worked out how many towels to take into the locker room to cover themselves up completely as they changed.

'I asked my daughter what she would do if Lia was changing in there,' said the mother. 'And she said resignedly, 'I'm not sure I'd have a choice.' I still can't believe I had to tell my adult-age daughter that you always have a choice about whether you undress in front of a man.'

What messages have these girls been receiving?

My heart was ripped apart. I closed the door for ever on making any kind of deal with Hat Trick. I was prepared to betray myself for £200,000, but I couldn't abandon my daughter.

BEFORE the gender hoopla, I only knew people in the media. Now I had been so effectively cancelled that virtually no one in the media would return my calls. But I began to count as friends social workers, police officers, solicitors, barristers, doctors, nurses and academics who sided with me or shared my experience.

One of the few people I still know in the creative arts is the choreographer Rosie Kay.

At a party at her home in Birmingham for her company of young dancers — some of whom went by 'preferred' pronouns — the conversation turned to her plan for an adaptation of Virginia Woolf's gender-bending Orlando.

The discussion turned heated as she explained that she strongly believed in the reality of sex because she and her son had both almost died while she was in labour.

During that ordeal, her womanhood was literally a matter of life and death for her.

Her husband would never know that experience, and that difference between them meant something.

To the little sparrows of the Church of Gender, this was all high heresy, and could not be tolerated. The dancers harangued Rosie to such an extent that she hid in her own bathroom, then they formally complained about her to the company chiefs.

'They cancelled Orlando and then were making efforts to re-educate me, to stop me from centring women's rights in my future work,' Rosie told me. 'I had to resign from the company I founded.'

Then there's the children's author Rachel Rooney, who wrote a picture book called My Body Is Me. Its message was that children should be happy with their body.

But trans rights activists dislike any mention of being happy with your body as it undermines their message that being trans is a thrilling and transformative lifestyle choice.

Tweets called the book terrorist propaganda and likened Rachel to a white supremacist.

The author's 'trade union', the Society of Authors, declined to offer support. So devastating was the experience that Rachel stopped writing books for children and has now taken on a part-time care job.

But what did Rachel do to deserve cancellation? She wrote a beautiful, kind, responsible book for children, and she got the same treatment I received: they tried to destroy her life. Trans activists mostly target women for disagreeing with them, but I'm not the only man to have suffered. Some 30 years after we'd first worked together, I crossed paths once more with the comic actor James Dreyfus (Constable Kevin in The Thin Blue Line).

I persuaded him to sign a letter asking Stonewall, the former lesbian and gay rights charity which has altered its remit and done more than any other institution in the UK to promote extreme gender ideology, to reconsider its stance.

James agreed without hesitation. The letter argued that Stonewall was 'seeking to prevent public debate of these issues by branding as transphobic anyone who questions [its] current trans policies'. It asked the charity to 'commit to fostering an atmosphere of respectful debate'.

Stonewall refused. Even asking the question was painted as a moral failing. Five years later, James is still being hounded by trans rights activists and he has had difficulty finding work.

In 2021, the company Big Finish released Masterful, a celebration of 50 years of Doctor Who's arch-enemy, The Master, who James had played on its audio productions.

The credits featured every living actor who had taken the iconic role… except James. When the history of these years is written, it's not only the extremist activists who will be recalled with revulsion, but also the spineless corporate figures who never made an attempt to resist them. Their inaction contributed to the ruin of James's livelihood.

A brilliant comic actor, a gay man, was abandoned by the very people who should have had his back, because the celebrity class is more interested in looking like they're doing the right thing than actually doing it.

Meanwhile, a chasm was opening up between me and my wife as she watched me lose jobs and opportunities.

Helen was looking for normality, and I was perpetually dismayed and angry. She asked me to cease operations, which she was perfectly within her rights to do to protect our family.

But I couldn't do it. I knew what everyone who's in this fight knows — the Gender Stasi never forgive.

I could never be confident of a having a job again until the entire gender ideology movement, which has caused so much misery, was burnt to ashes.

Even if I had been prepared to recant or keep my mouth shut, it wouldn't do any good because my heresy was out there and would never be forgiven.

I could never be confident of a having a job again until the entire gender ideology movement, which has caused so much misery, was burnt to ashes.

Even if I had been prepared to recant or keep my mouth shut, it wouldn't do any good because my heresy was out there and would never be forgiven.

I was fighting for women and children, sure, but also for my reputation and my ability to make a living.

With my marriage now over, I left the family home and moved into a modest flat. It had a nursing home for old people to one side and an overgrown, neglected graveyard behind it — which is a little too symbolic of my situation for comfort.

Adapted from Tough Crowd by Graham Linehan (Eye Books, £19.99) to be published October 12. © Graham Linehan 2023. To order a copy for £17.99 (offer valid to 15/10/2023; UK P&P free on orders over £25) go to mailshop.co.uk/books or call 020 3176 2937.

[johanna-swann]

no but ryan gusman defending nonBlacks using the n word was soooo revealing in the 9-1-1 fandom. people still defend it bc "he claimed afterwards he misspoke" and "he apologized" and "people were mad at his wife, what was he supposed to say?" but tbh, saying in 2020 that you and your friends regularly call each other racial slurs doesn't sit right with me period. especially when he tried to blame latino ppl using the n word on...Black latinos for "normaliizing" the word in the community. (including cardi B T_T)

it just. regardless of whether he "misspoke" during part of it, it was all really nasty. and claiming he misspoke and offering one of the most textbook apologies does still make me side-eye him and his fans. same with the anti-vax shit he promoted briefly, which was VERY weird.

Yes, I read an article on that earlier today and the way he immediately tried to shift responsibility and blame onto other people - some of them black people - in his apology felt really uncomfortable.

Everytime something like this happens I also think these actors must me incredibly stupid. They are public figures. Their career depends on them being likeable. And then in the 2020s they'll be over on insta and twitter defending racism or making transphobic jokes. That's not just insensitive, it's first and foremost incredibly idiotic.

[wildandmoody]

Just copying what i said on twitter

I h8 to be a debbie downer mj fan again but Victory Day is always bittersweet to me, and i think the older i get the more jaded I'll become about it, bc while Michael was rightfully found innocent the media and wh*te am*rica at large still all but got what they wanted out of the trial - to turn MJ's name into a laughing stock and tarnish his image.

I was very young when it all happened (7-8 yrs old in '05) but I do remember what it was like back then. The "jokes" and 1-sided reporting was horrible and unavoidable, every major media outlet so badly wanted him to go to prison, i even remember chants calling him slurs. This didn't completely go away even during the time of his passing bc it didn't happen that long after - just four years. No wonder Michael reportedly said that despite it all he still felt that he lost everything except for his family and fans. It hurts to know that he was gone just four years after this, not ever fully recovering from the ordeal physically, financially, emotionally.

I just hope that at some point he knew towards the end that he was loved unconditionally, supported unconditionally, and that his TRUE fans and very, very few TRUE friends always knew that he would never harm anyone. Given what's easily available online now (including actual, organized legal documents), including proof of no incriminating evidence from over -12 years- of thorough FBI investigation and 74 days of court examination (making him one of the most scrutinized men in US history), there's no excuse for anyone who truly wants to understand to not know this. #MichaelJacksonIsInnocent always & forever.