#this fandom made me a sadist

[zychimixx]

TW: Suicide

“I’ll hang myself here.”

[triglycercule]

"finally, mine. heh, and it looks better than both of yours."

"uhhh, mine and dust's are both in the same style, same everything. like, there's not even that much different about yours, horror."

"yeah, but it's me."

"i hope an alternate version of you gets severely mischaracterized irreparably."

"... damn."

💜/💙/❤️

[darknesspervades]

i think that a lot of the fandom mischaracterises hijacked!peeta and it low key bugs me

because he isn't a single-minded murderer or filled with bloodlust - he's terrified

like a wounded animal, he lashes out at katniss because of how much he fears her; his mind has been so utterly warped that he can't see an escape other than through violence. he's convinced she's going to torture him, so he wants to stop her

which is why i think the idea that he hurts her post-mockingjay isn't a fair assumption; by this point, he's recovered enough that he is no longer violent. even in the capitol, his final descriptive relapse shows him punishing himself before he's willing to lay a hand on katniss

while he'll obviously never fully recover, his reported periods of relapse (grabbing the back of chairs and the like) are drawn from terror, previously aimed at katniss and later at himself as he gains back functionality

he was never warped into a mutt, or stripped of his personhood, or turned into a sadist. he was just made to fear everyone and everything - primarily katniss, which then manifested as a fear of himself.

[bunnys-kisses]

the group chat (lando's version)

lando norris

cw: smut/pwp, (consensual) filming, blow jobs, lando's infamous keycard, cum play, facials, cum eating,

bunny says: 🚬🐰

want to find a different driver? check out the list here!

the infamous driver's group chat was talked about in the fandom like it was the holy grail of the behind the scenes of formula one. some thought it was where driver's duked it out over text messages. others thought it was steamy gossip. but in reality it was a typical group chat.

that was until one evening after free practice, when the chat received a new message from lando. a lengthy video file shot in high definition, titled "come_and_get_it.mp4"

the chat was quick to peek at what lando had sent.

the first few seconds was you on your knees naked, looking up at the camera. you blinked a few times before you asked, "why are we doing this?"

"because." lando said, "it's for the boys."

you made a face at the camera and half-heartedly said, "i hope you enjoy this then."

"hey, don't make it seem like you won't have fun!" he said, "i know how much you like giving me head." he reached down and cupped your face as he leaned in to kiss you in front of the camera.

he kept the phone focused on you as he showed you the keycard and you said to him, "seriously. this is stupid." you looked up at him. your eyes gleamed in the soft lighting of the hotel room.

you knew the boys were sadistic little fucks who got off to watching other driver's fuck their partners, but to wear lando's infamous keycard while he fucked your throat was something else.

lando dangled his lanyard in front of the camera and your face. the plastic of the keycard almost hit you in the nose, "i need to find a way to keep it from getting stolen again."

"i think you mean lost." you corrected. you made a face when he put it around your neck. not a single stitch of clothing on you except for the lanyard and keycard.

lando grabbed you by the face and pulled you in fro a hot kiss in front of the group chat, "i know the boys would love to watch me punish the hell out of you, but we don't have much time. gotta get to the track."

"you're giving the boys an early morning wake-up." you said as you reached out for the front of lando's sweatpants. you looked up to him and the camera with a darling smile.

the driver's were surprised that lando managed to pull someone like you. you were just so nice. when it was a home race in silverstone, you happily baked for all of mclaren, from the mechanics through to upper management. you painstakingly made shortbread cookies that you iced to look like the union jack.

now lando had you between his legs with a camera on your face and his other hand grazing your soft lips, "you look so good like this. maybe next time we should live stream it so i can see what the others are truly thinking." he chuckled.

you whined, there was a slight rush to it all. you rubbed your thighs together, the camera got a perfect view of your body and you got lando's cock out of his pants. you leaned in and gave the tip and small kiss which made the driver shudder.

lando remarked, "bet the others are creaming their pants right now." he rested against the bed for a little stability as he got ready for you to go down on him.

you placed your mouth on his cock like you had dozens of times. you braced your hands on his thighs and teased it against your lips. the shudder from lando excited you. you prayed that this didn't get leaked from the group chat.

"that's a good girl." he groaned as he gulped in a heavy breath. one hair was on his phone, filming you, and the other was in your hair as he pulled at it a little, "you're so pretty like this."

you whimpered his name but it was mumbled by his cock in your mouth. you shifted on your knees and looked up at him. the limited light in the hotel room made you feel a little ethereal as you pleasured him orally.

"i love how you feel around me." he said with a laugh, "pretty girl. you always look so nice on the track. but i know what you do after. whole separate wardrobe just for my eyes."

your cheeks felt hot but you couldn't look away from lando's oppressive gaze. his words curled in your gut as you felt his cock nudge against the back of his throat. you let out a whimper from the back of your throat as you tried to get a little further.

your eyes closed as you got into the rhythm. the video showed you in a debouched state, the pretty, almost innocent girl that lando was dating was on her knees sucking his decently sized cock. you clutched onto his thighs for support and kept steady.

"holy shit."

you whimpered and quickened your pace. you could see how hot he was getting. you worked your tongue across the bottom of his cock and lando was moaning.

he was moaning louder than the wet sounds of his cock in your mouth. his hands tightened in your hair as he rocked against your throat. his hissed through his teeth as he felt his pulse quicken.

you looked up at him one more time and felt a flutter in your chest. the expression on his face was a sign you were doing a good job.

"fuck, yeah, baby girl." he groaned as he felt so close to climax. this was going to be a sight for the boys!

he pulled out and jerked his cock a few times before cum spurted out all over your face and hair. you whined as you squeezed your eyes shut to ensure you didn't get it in your eyes.

you were both panting heavily, and lando was about to stop the video when he saw you wipe the cum off your face and eat it.

"holy shit." he said as he got closer to your face, the pearly white of his cum gleamed on your face as you wiped it off, leaving streaks behind that you'd have to properly wash, the camera was in your personal space as he asked, "how was that?"

you slowly opened your eyes at him and said, "best i've ever had." then lando ended the video there to do god knows what to do you (fuck you till you were bouncing on the bed), and sent the video file to the chat while you were riding him.

after he was finished with you, with you now curled up in the soft hotel bed. he snapped a picture of your nude back and one of the key card in the bed beside you, with the caption "won't lose it this time!"

[arowyn-m]

I meant to do this ages ago but knowing the leaks exist is driving me insane so I’m devoting my energy to it now—

Obsessed with the idea of Arcane characters becoming their opposites in S2 so I’ve attempted to summarize each character in 3 words—a good quality or strength, a bad quality or weakness, and a neutral trait.

Vi: Protective, Hotheaded, Sentimental

Caitlyn: Empathetic, Naive, Perceptive

Jinx: Creative, Impulsive, Childish

Ekko: Nurturing, Aggressive, Distrustful

Heimer: Patient, Unresponsive, Pessimistic

Jayce: Charismatic, Shortsighted, Proud

Viktor: Self-sacrificing, Stubborn, Reserved

Mel: Wise, Manipulative, Perfectionistic

Singed: Calculated, Sadistic, Cryptic

Sevika: Loyal, Impatient, Honest

Ambessa: Cunning, Ruthless, Selfish

Assuming that these are solid descriptors for each character, and S2 will show these characters becoming their own opposites, we can expect good qualities to become bad ones and vice versa. Neutral qualities may also be turned on their heads:

Vi: Vulnerable, Apathetic, Repressing

Caitlyn: Cold, Experienced, Blinded

Jinx: Destructive (in maybe a different context than S1), Deliberate, Mature

Ekko: Neglectful, Avoidant, Trusting

Heimer: Impatient, Proactive, Lighthearted

Jayce: Unlikable, Farsighted, Humble (or Humbled)

Viktor: Selfish, Compromising, Outspoken

Mel: Foolish, Sincere, Self-accepting

Singed: Careless, Empathetic, Unambiguous

Sevika: Independent, Patient, Aloof

Ambessa: Candid, Merciful, Self-sacrificing

Further analysis below ->

A lot of these qualities are probably going to be tweaked. I don’t think we’re going to get a wildly empathetic Singed, but rather we’ll see some more of his personal motivations, which will show him to be more feeling than he seems.

I honestly don’t see us getting a straight-up self-centered Viktor, so part of me believes that he’ll be “selfish” in the context of his personal ambitions. He’s been working in tandem with Jayce for years; been willing to give up time for other projects that aren’t Undercity-centric. Viktor’s focus is going to be entirely on physically healing the Undercity—a project that only he seems to see the value in. That’s probably going to be the “selfish” aspect we see from him.

Or at least I really hope so.

Viktor’s selflessness is such an integral part of his character that it’s hard to imagine him suddenly becoming self-absorbed, but if the writers handle it well, then 👍

Similar issue with Jayce—I don’t see Jayce becoming humble so much as being humbled or put in his place (maybe by Ambessa, who looks poised to usurp Piltover’s Council judging by previous story beats and her strong presence in the S2 poster.

I like Jayce as a character and really think the fandom doesn’t give him enough credit for caring about those around him—but he’s pretty full of himself, and I only see him leaning further into that trait as those he trusts (Mel, Viktor, Caitlyn) are either pulled away or abandon him.

Sevika’s possible development in particular is quite interesting specifically because she is a follower by definition. In S1, Sevika would not have made a good leader, but maybe she will in S2.

Sevika could start acting independently to contrast her previous loyalty. Even when in an alliance she can have independent motives. We know she’s going to team up with Jinx but it’s unlikely that Sevika is going to be personally devoted to her, and maybe this alliance is a temporary, spur-of-the-moment decision.

If Sevika starts being independent, I’ve no doubt she’ll later become Renata Glasc.

okay that’s it! Feel free to add to this or take away or completely contradict me I’d love to continue to think about and discuss what defines these characters :)

[roachliquid]

Man. It really bites seeing Maximus (from the Fallout series) be so heavily overlooked by the fandom, when he is such a well-written character. Bar none, he's one of the best fictional examples I have ever seen of someone raised in a high-control group.

The Brotherhood of Steel, in their entirety, are given all the classic traits of a cult or HCG. They boast about having these grandiose ideals, all of which revolve around controlling other people's behavior. They use those same ideals to justify abusing lower-ranking members, implying all the while that it serves some greater good. And despite their supposedly rigorous beliefs, they're happy to turn a blind eye to unsanctioned abuse - because it serves the same purpose of keeping people "in their place".

Then we're introduced to Maximus - a young man who has made the mistake of taking those ideals seriously, but due to the environment he's been trapped in, was never taught how to act on them in a real and meaningful way. And in the process of figuring that out, he fucks up. (He fucks up a lot, because the Brotherhood wouldn't dare teach him anything that might help him function without their support.) But he genuinely wants to do the right thing, and we see that come through time and again as he slowly learns how to be his own person.

And yet, even with all that growth under his belt, getting away from the group isn't that simple. Because, like any high control group worth its salt, the Brotherhood doesn't want you to leave. Sure, they'll threaten to kick you out (or in this case, kill you) - because it keeps you in line. But they'd much rather have you under their thumb, so he still has to deal with the threat of getting sucked back in.

As a cult survivor, I rarely see people like me depicted accurately in the media. We're almost always either scheming sadists or helpless barefoot victims - you rarely see a nuanced depiction of how a regular person, with both good intentions and the skills needed to get away, can still end up trapped in that kind of group. Maximus is an incredible example of how that can play out, and I hope more people come to appreciate both him as a character and how well that dynamic was handled.

[gingerhastoomanyobsessions]

the lords in black are so interesting to me because. they’re so us. we’re watching the citizens of hatchetfield suffer for our own entertainment just as much as they are. we’re their accomplices in all of it

pokotho made hatchetfield into a musical because musicals are entertaining. and we ate that shit up! it’s soooo fun watching a little man scramble as the world around him bursts into song. the musical genre is satirized because pokey knows how the genre conventions work just as well as we do. we like watching musicals so much that black friday and npmd are musicals, too, even though they don’t revolve around pokotho’s plans as much as tgwdlm. we want them to sing. pokotho does too.

bliklotep is the audience and the audience is bliklotep. trail to oregon calls the audience “the watcher with one thousand eyes” and that’s not all, in watcher world blinky seems to be able to see through the eyes of anyone and everyone who loves spectacle. he wants to see the characters go through angst because WE love angst. it’s fun to watch alice and bill express their buried frustrations. blinky wants it to end in bloodshed because he loves tragedy, and let’s face it, so do we. it’s like that one post about how hamlet is aware of the audience and is angry that we don’t do anything to intervene because we want to see how it plays out. personally, I think blinky could have stopped the woodwards if he really wanted (he’s an elder god, after all) but alice shooting him shifted the narrative so that the emotional payoff would be more fulfilling if they escaped. and blinky loves a good story.

t’noy karaxis has blorbos. we joke about it, but that’s really what it is, isn’t it? he’s the fan who watches the movie again and again and again and again to see his favorite character’s dramatic death scene. he’s the guy who writes and reads angst fics by the hundreds because he likes to see his faves cry. he’s the hatchetfield enjoyer who’s on the edge of their seat waiting to see how ted kicks the bucket this time. the bastard’s box is pretty much just an ao3 account filled with whump and hurt no comfort. he’s sadistic AND he genuinely adores ted, because we fans are often cruelest to the characters we love the most. he puts ted through character growth— the realization that his life went the way it did because of his own mistakes, his inability to be vulnerable with jenny before it was too late— and he does that by writing a 56-chapter angst fic that’s still updating to this day

nibblenephim is the fan who voraciously devours every scrap of content that a creator produces and demands more, more, more. let’s face it, the fandom will never let starkid rest until we see this story through to its end. and then someone will demand a sequel series. nibbly is hungry because we will never stop yearning for more stories. he’s simple because that desire itself is simple— as humans, we need creativity like we need air to breathe. nibbly wants more because we want more. and we will never be satiated.

wiggog y’rath is the ruler and the king because he’s the self-inserting writer. I think jon matteson plays paul *and* wiggly for a reason— wiggly is the only lord in black to be played by the same actor in every single show, and that actor also plays the protagonist of tgwdlm. wiggly wants to be the protagonist. he tries to force himself into the human world of hatchetfield because he wants to participate, dammit! he wants to be the bestest ruler that the earth has ever seen! everyone has to love him because he’s going to be their bestest fwiend! when he appears in human form he’s gonna be the prom king! he’s the ebony dark’ness dementia raven way of the hatchetfield multiverse. he wants every human character to bend to his whims and to love him and to put him at the tippy-top of planet earth because he’s the writer and the writer’s main character, you fuckheads, and he can make whatever story he wants, whether the other characters like it or not! if you’ve ever written a self-insert story? congratulations! you’ve been wiggog y’rath.

and the funny thing? I don’t think the lords know that they, too, are as fictional as anyone else in hatchetfield. maybe blinky knows— he sees through the audience’s eyes, after all— but I don’t think the others do. if they did, maybe they’d be a little less tyrannical. a little bit nicer.

but then the starkid writers wouldn’t have much of a story to tell, would they?

[dl-drama-cd]

Diabolik Lovers DRAMA CDs' Audios FULL LINK MASTERLIST

This is the fullnearby link-list of all DL Drama CDs web-uploaded ever. Masterlist was made by AnShiva. Most of dramas belong to other fans. Some audios were specially gifted to us by Re-Lo: she gave a permission to upload her files. Her own bought dramas marked green. Those ones that were uploaded somewhen before but dead-linked now I've reuploaded on my source too. Marked violet. Owners are missing. Still missing audios marked red. The full list of missings is there. Feel free to inform me about the broken links and new CDs! I wish we could preserve all the fandom CD-treasures.

ドS吸血CD

Blood&LoveSweat

Versus + プレミアムBox

Diabolik Lovers (game tokutens)

Character Song

ドS吸血CD More,Blood

More,Blood (game tokutens)

Anime DVD s01

DL Limited V Edition (game tokutens)

Versus Ⅱ

Dark Fate

More Character Song

Vandead Carnival (game tokutens)

More,Blood Limited V Edition (game tokutens)

Dark Fate (game tokutens)

Bloody Bouquet

Versus Song Requiem (2) Bloody Night

Lunatic Parade (game tokutens)

Anime More,Blood DVD s02

Versus Ⅲ

Lost Eden

Lost Eden (game tokutens)

Sadistic Song

Chaos Lineage

Para-Selene

無神家5th Eternal Blood

Versus Ⅳ 

Grand Edition (game tokutens)

ZERO

Chaos Lineage (game tokutens)

Born to Die

More, More Blood + tokutens

Daylight + tokutens

House of Vampire

Events, Countdowns, Interviews and Radio Specials

OTHER DL CONTENT

Games | Anime | Manga | Fanbooks | Booklets | SS | Letters | Magazines | other

[creepzkilla]

No because those EJ headcannons 😳 are so good aldhworjeoejekr you wrote him so perfectly 😫

If it's ok, can I request some NSFW Creepypasta Toby headcannons? You can make them as dark as you like, but DAMN I have to admit the way you write characters is so gooooodddd 💖💖💖

↳˳⸙;; ❝ TICCI TOBY KINK HC'S! + BONUS ᵕ̈ ೫˚∗

[A/N]--tyty i always enjoy slasher creepypasta-- the more realistic version of the fandom. its always been more entertaining for me... the mansion kinda HC never really stuck with me unless portrayed really good? its so hard to find fics that are like that... but anyways wtf my first ask this deserves a bonus smut at the end?!?!?! sry for the delay too i’ve had writers block wtf… the second half is shit ngl

NSFW. warning— NOT PROOF READ fem! anatomy, dub-con, somnophilia, toby being a perv, sadist, bondage,breeding, exhibition

TOBY IS A CLOSET PERVERT--

he remembers when he first started stalking you. when he first snuck into your house while you were fast asleep as he kept a watchful eye over your sleeping form. you were ethereal, he couldn't help himself following you home- or going through your panty drawer. you couldn't blame him, really, you couldn't. you look so cute in your satin pink thongs that he just had to steal one. or three.

sadist-- toby just adores watching you contort underneath his touch as you squirm away from him. he won't hesitate to leave harsh slaps across the meat of your ass or dark bruises made from his belt into makeshift handcuffs

bondage-- he loves tying you up in all sorts of different lewd positions. toby takes pride watching you whimper under his calloused hands begging for your hands and/or legs. he knows that those whimpers are only for him.

breeding-- toby has family issues... at first, he wouldn't want kids. he would dismiss the thought of ever having any kids in the first place... not wanting to turn into his dad. he was terrified. that was until he came in your pussy the first time. it was fucking life-changing. he loves the feeling of spilling his seed into your pretty pussy... he just can't go back after that. why buy condoms when he could watch his cum seep out of your pussy? he wouldn't mind having a kid or two.

mutual masturbation-- he goes wild watching your hands disappear into your heat as your mouth lets out a barrage of whimpers and moans. toby can't help but join in. whether you know if he's watching or not.

exhibitism-- this man just dont give af. if he wants you, he wants you. anytime, anyplace.

oral(fem receiving)-- this could be considered a kink because toby could probably cum buy just eating your pussy. he just cant get enough of it. he gets so painfully hard when he goes down on you. so you cant blame him when he paints his pants white.

corruption— this is a big one..you were a virgin, with little to no experience before you bet toby. something about that innocence he just had to protect… something he just had to corrupt. toby remembers when he first taught you how to give a blowjob. he could just cum by the perverted memory.

TOBY DEFINITELY JERKS OFF WITH YOUR PANTIES—

there’s no way he doesn’t. he fucking obsessed with the taste and smell of your pussy. the nights where he can’t come and visit you bet you can find a pair of your satin panties wrapped around his cock. toby just can’t help himself. he loves feeling the feeling of your juices rubbing up against his cock as he imagines runtting against you. it’s his dirty little secret… well it’s not much of a secret when your prairies start showing up stained with a white excrete.

HES SURPRISINGLY KINDA BIG—

now don’t get me wrong… toby isn’t a petite guy, he’s rather tall standing at 5’11 or 6’0. he’s a pretty built guy—he kinda has to be. so when i say surprisingly i mean you wouldn’t really except him to be a whopping 6’0 inches. his girth is on the skinny size but he makes up for it when hes hitting places you never knew existed. his tip is a dark pink, and the prettiest dick you’ve ever seen. you never thought that you’d be saying that about a dick or specifically a serial killers dick; but here you are… your not exactly complaining.

—-ˋˏ [‘Ill give you everything’] ˎˊ

—(Toby couldn’t help himself. He really couldnt. You just looked so gorgeous in your pink satin panties— which are your favorite pair— he couldn’t help but rub against the cotton material. It’s not like you’d mind anyways…you’ve always asked him to fuck you awake before, why not take you up on that offer?

He carefully moves the comforter from your shoulders, peeling it back allowing him to slip into your bed behind you . Toby sinks into the bed, spooning your relaxed body as the curve of your ass pressed into him.Almost instinctively your body pressed into the slasher completely, being enraptured by his warmth. You were oblivious to what you were doing to him.

His aching boner stretched against his pants, and fuck it was painful (from aching not actual pain) as he rubs up against your panties. It was almost like you wanted him to do this. Sleeping in only your underwear? It was like you’re asking him to move your panties to the side and fuck you.

His cold finger tips brush against your damp panties, hooking his finger on the seam of fabric, slowly and carefully pulling them down. toby was careful not to wake you—-not yet. He wants to savor this.

It was so unbelievably hot in your bedroom, almost like a sauna. If anything he was helping you cool down. You should appreciate his kind and just actions by taking of your clothes before you got too hot. He chuckled at that thought, ghosting his finger tips over your exposed shoulder, leaving goosebumps in his wake.

His lips hovered above your exposed neck, sending chills down your spine. Dark bruises soon began to litter your neck, ruining its once pristine image as Toby sunk his lips deeper in your skin, all while his other hand disappeared into your cunt.

You were so incredibly wet, so incredibly tight. His calloused hands slid in and out with ease, your walls sucking him in ever time. Toby was enraptured with your beauty, your flushed cheeks, your rosy lips, the soft whimpers that left your mouth; utterly gorgeous.

“Toby?” You awoke to nothing but darkness with an uncomfortable feeling in your stomach, an all too familiar one. A warmth spread throughout your body like wildfire as the prevalent feelings grew. The sensation— that you couldn’t put a finger on—- just felt so good, you couldn’t help but melt into it.

Toby hummed in response, too busy on concentrating on the task at hand; fingering your tight cunt. The lewd sounds that gushed around his hands was deafening; almost forgetting that you were awake.

“Are you e-enjoying yours-self?” He laughed, curling his fingers inside of you, rubbing up against a patch of sensitive nerves.

You yelped, now being fully awake, clearly aware of the sensation— that is being full. You could only moan in response as his fingers continuously plunged in and out of sopping cunt as your core tightened.

Toby’s lips attached to the crook of your neck once again, tracing over the dark bruises that began to form— biting ever so slightly on your sweet spot (that only he knows of). His unoccupied hand, cupped the meat of your thigh, lifting it up to gain better access for his other hand that was moving at an insatiable speed.

“P…Please, I need you…I want all of you.” A barrage of moans left your lips, as your hand curled behind you to grip the man’s hair that assaulted your skin. Your sharp nails dug into his scalp, tugging on tuffs of his unkept brown hair—signaling your desperation.

Suddenly, he was on top of you. Straddling your exposed bottom half with his thighs, a lustful glint ever so present in his eyes. His lips were a cherry red, presumably from his attack on your neck as well as his hands that were slick with your cunt. You take immediate notice of the large tent swelling in his blue jeans, you could only guess at how painful it was.

“A-are you sure?” Toby hummed, his scarred hands tracing over your waist, “I’m not g-gonna go easy on you.” His voice came out as a whisper, as if it was some horrible secret—a taboo. To which it was, not like you knew or anything— but toby has a secret, commmited horrible sins that can never be reversed— you shouldn’t be doing this with him… He feels guilty almost— yet it’s so enticing… His hands devouring your body as if his hands weren’t covered in blood merely hours before.

But you’ll never know, right?

“I want all of you, Toby.” He looks down at your delicate form, such innocence. Your skin was practically glowing in the moonlight that shone threw the raked blinds, making you look almost angelic. He was scared to touch you, like you would crumble under his touch. Like you would see him for the monster— the pyschopath he truly is, a devil.

Yet, that’s what makes it so exciting, so enticing to see your angelic body beneath him. The danger, the corruption. It only added fuel to the fire, and soon it would become a wild fire.

Your body; merely heaven and earth wrapped into one.

He; the virus, a plague that never stops— pollution your body and everything in between.

Is it really worth it? If he really loved you— he would let you go— right?

“I’ll give you ev-verything. Anything you w-want.” Toby whispers, his hands on your waist crawling towards your chest—drawing secret messages that only you would know. His usual ice cold hands, were anything but cold. They were warm. His hands roamed your body, and spread throughout your body like a flame— he devoured everything in his path.

Your body reacted to him like a magnetic. His name fell off of your lips along with whispered promises and wonton moans. You were meant for him— maybe poisoning you isn’t so bad. Maybe—just maybe, it was meant to happen.

[a-chip-in-inosukes-nichirin]

Idiot

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Rating: Explicit - Minors DNI (18+ only)

Genre: Angst/Smut

Pairing: Sukuna x Reader

Tags: Heartbreak, Oral Sex, Hookups, Fucking your crush's brother, Bickering, Creampie, Slight Themes of SA, Sadistic Sukuna, Sukuna is his own warning, Female Reader, Hair Pulling, Painful Sex, Hate/Revenge Sex (sorta), Complicated Dynamics

Wordcount: 4.6k

Yuuji- your crush of two years- was dating someone else. The news was like a slap to the face. Honestly, though, you should have expected it. He was sweet, kind, and a little dense in an endearing way. He’d caught your eye the moment you two had met and hit it off, becoming fast friends. Your affection had grown into something more, but you’d tried to take things slow, not wanting to ruin your friendship.

You'd lost your chance... but Sukuna had gained one.

Cross-posted from my AO3 account.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The parking lot on the side of the bar was full of cars and litter, the latter of which you kicked at with a foot as you plopped onto a bench thrown haphazardly against the outside wall as an afterthought. The air was still and warm, inky blackness above hazed out by the light pollution of the city, obscuring all but the brightest few stars breaking through. The noise of the bar you’d left moments ago leaked out into the streets that were alive with the nightlife of downtown, tangling into a comforting cacophony. It would have been a perfect night if not for the bitter memory that was replaying over and over in your head as you tugged on your earrings- a self-soothing habit that had appeared the moment you’d pierced them.

“I heard you’re dating someone, Yuuji.”

Your friend’s face lit up in excited bashfulness as he grinned, ducking his head shyly. You’d nearly choked on your drink, holding a napkin to your face as your visage filled with disbelief and thinly veiled horror. Yuuji pulled out his phone to show a picture of the lucky girl, which only twisted the knife in your chest, but you smiled when he turned to you.

“She’s very pretty!” you forced out, beaming a little too widely to cover the stricken look on your face.

“Yeah,” Yuuji agreed, “She asked me out a few months ago and we’ve been dating. I finally asked her to be my girlfriend yesterday and she said yes!”

Yuuji- your crush of two years- was dating someone else. The news was like a slap to the face. Honestly, though, you should have expected it. He was sweet, kind, and a little dense in an endearing way. He’d caught your eye the moment you two had met and hit it off, becoming fast friends. Your affection had grown into something more, but you’d tried to take things slow, not wanting to ruin your friendship.

And now you’d lost your chance.

You’d made up a lame excuse about stepping out for some air, leaving the crowd of friends and mutual acquaintances behind to find your thoughts and breath outside where it wasn’t as suffocating. You didn’t smoke, but tonight you wished you did so you would have something for your mouth to do aside from pull into a tight line as you held back the dam threatening to break.

In retrospect, you had no place to be so upset with the way things had turned out.

You’d dropped hints, which became more and more obvious over time, until you felt like you had been parading around with a sign saying, “please date me, I like you”. You’d even been teased by a few of your friends, but you were determined to have him notice and ask you out. If you’d just been direct with Yuuji and asked him out like his girlfriend had-

You grimaced at the nausea welling up at the word “girlfriend” and “Yuuji’s” in the same sentence. It left a sour taste in your mouth.

“Your face is going to get stuck like that.”

You whipped your head towards the figure that had appeared nearby, standing on the far side of the bench. For a brief moment you thought it was Yuuji, heart fluttering, before your eyes caught on the dark tattoos lining the angular jawline. Your hopeful face fell a bit upon realizing it was Sukuna, Yuuji’s elder brother. The two could be identical twins with their pink hair and similar features, except that Sukuna sported tattoos across his larger frame and had the exact opposite personality of his brother. Whereas Yuuji was sweet- basically sunshine personified- Sukuna was barbed with sharp words and held an aura of danger, issuing a threat and a challenge with his narrowed eyes and cocky demeanor.

How the two were related was beyond you.

“And?” you finally found your voice and replied to the man, sighing and leaning back. “I don’t care.”

“You should, since you won’t get a guy with that kind of attitude.”

You scowled at him. Sukuna barely talked to you when you hung around Yuuji at their apartment, so why was he picking on you right now?

“Who says I’m trying to get a guy?”

Sukuna scoffed.

“I’m not blind. I know why you’re out here.”

Your heart fell into your toes and your shoulders pulled up towards your ears in shame. Of course Yuuji’s aloof yet observant older brother would have picked up on your little crush. Yuuji seemed to be the only one who had missed it apparently, if those pitying looks you’d caught out of the corner of your eye earlier had been anything to go by.

“He’s an idiot,” Sukuna continued in the absence of a reply.

He leaned lazily against the brick exterior of the building; his leather jacket slung over one shoulder in the heat of the night. Why he even brought a fucking leather jacket was beyond you. Probably because he thought he was “cool”. You scoffed a little to yourself, bitterness oozing through all your emotions.

You couldn’t deny he looked a little cool…

“Whatever,” you mumbled, resting your chin on your palm.

“You’re seriously moping about your little crush not getting your piss-poor attempts for flirting through his thick head?”

“Are you trying to pick a fight?”

You pushed yourself up to cross your arms and glower at Sukuna. He sure knew how to get under your skin, even if you’d only really seen each other in passing.

“You’re the one getting all bent out of shape over Yuuji getting a girlfriend,” Sukuna laughed, and it grated on your nerves. “Which is pretty pathetic if you ask me.”

“Pathetic?”

Sukuna grinned, leaning over you. The way he held himself, the way his eyes lit up with delight at the way he’d forced you to crane your neck up at him, the way his words needled you: it all felt like he was toying with you. It pissed you off. You narrowed your eyes.

“You can’t even ask some kid three years your junior out, of course it’s pathetic.”

He leaned down until there was only a hairs breadth between your noses. He was so close you could smell his cologne. If you hadn’t been focused on burning two holes into his skull you might have missed the way his eyes flickered down to your lips for a fraction of a second. It caught you off guard.

“Bold words from someone who probably wouldn’t be able to get a girl in bed if he begged on his knees.”

“That’s because I don’t beg,” Sukuna’s lips pulled back to reveal sharp canines.

You resisted the urge to shudder- whether from fear or a thrill you couldn’t be sure.

“Too bad,” you cocked your head to the side. “You’d look good on your knees.”

The words coming out of your mouth surprised you a little. Usually, you kept thoughts like those to yourself, but your tongue was loose tonight and you couldn’t find it in you to give a shit.

Sukuna’s smile widened alongside his eyes. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say he appeared almost gleeful. The strength of his gaze pinned you in place while his words prickled along your spine.

“And here I thought you’d be boring.”

“Sorry to disappoint.”

This time your eyes flickered down to his lips briefly.

Sukuna intrigued you. You hadn’t bothered to pay him much mind aside from cordiality when he was around, which he seldom returned. Your focus had been on being head-over-heels for Yuuji. Now, you took the time to take in his wide shoulders, flinty red eyes, and- holy shit was he wearing acrylics? The black, claw-like nails tipping each of his fingers drew your attention as he shifted his jacket to the other shoulder, still crowding himself into your personal space.

“So you just put on an act to appeal to my baby brother?” Sukuna asked.

You crossed your arms, looking away. You took a minute, trying to decide how to phrase what you wanted to say in a way that wouldn’t have Sukuna laughing at you. No matter how you diced it, it still sounded stupid to say out loud.

“I just toned-down things that I thought might… make him uncomfortable or scare him off.”

The man snorted, this time slipping his arms into the jacket he was holding instead of shifting it again.

“If you have to hide yourself to make yourself palatable, then how is the other person supposed to know if they actually like you?”

You hated being lectured by Sukuna, but he was right- not that you’d ever give him the satisfaction of knowing you agreed.

“So we should all be prickly and annoying like you?” you shot back.

“Is that what you think of me?”

You looked him up and down, feigning disinterest as he curled one side of his mouth up. You resisted the urge to slip your hand along his jawline, to run your thumb along his bottom lip.

“You have a habit of picking fights and teasing people. I’d hardly say that’s endearing.”

Sukuna’s hand darted out to grab your chin, tilting it up towards him while he looked down his nose at you, head cocked. You didn’t rip your face away, waiting to see what he would say next and relishing in the way his hand felt against your skin.

“I never set out to be endearing, sweetheart,” his words were condescending, but the gravelly undertones made you curl your toes inside your shoes as you wet your lips. His thumb rested lazily on your chin, and your mouth had moved before you could properly think, swallowing his digit.

Sukuna’s eyes widened as they locked on your lips, your tongue laving delicately around his sharp nail and caressing the pad of his thumb. The taste of sweat and skin was sweeter than the alcohol you’d ingested earlier, and you wondered if perhaps you were a little drunk to be enjoying the look on Sukuna’s face as much as you were. You released his finger with an audible pop, eyes still locked onto Sukuna’s.

“Is that how you wanna play it?”

Your insides shivered at his low register. Sukuna threaded his hand in your hair, grabbing a fistful close to the scalp and using it to guide you forcefully through the parking lot. It should have scared you, but for some reason the wires in your brain got crossed and filled you with excitement. Sukuna released your head from his grip, throwing his leg over a motorcycle (okay that was definitely cool) and gesturing for you to hop on.

“No helmet?” you asked, sliding on behind him.

“Do I look like someone who’d wear a helmet?” Sukuna scoffed.

You didn’t have time to answer as something heavy was shoved over your head. After reorienting yourself, you realized it was indeed a helmet. You found purchase around Sukuna’s waist and chest with anxious fingers as the engine roared to life. Sukuna noted your frantic grasp, and the engine revved several times, the vehicle jumping forward in speed until you were clinging to him for dear life as the two of you sped down roads, weaving through traffic.

The asshole was enjoying it.

You realized now why he wore a leather jacket in the middle of summer as a chill dragged itself across your bare arms in the wind whipping by. City lights smeared into each other, leaving a kaleidoscope of colors and shadows to play in your vision as you hunched against Sukuna’s body. Terror gripped your chest as you engaged muscles you didn’t know you possessed to grip onto whatever you could with all your strength. Even through the fear, you noted how lithe Sukuna’s body felt under your fingers. You wondered how it would feel without fabric blocking your skin from touching.

You must be insane.

When the ride came to an end, Sukuna had parked in front of his and Yuuji’s apartment. You fumbled the helmet off while he dismounted, setting it on the empty seat in front of you. Sukuna yanked you from the vehicle with one hand, barely letting you catch your balance before dragging you up the stairs. When you didn’t move fast enough, feet tripping over each other, he hauled you up with one arm, throwing you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. An undignified squeal left your mouth before you could help it. You scrabbled to reorient yourself as Sukuna came to a halt in front of his apartment door. Your struggling was rewarded with a sharp slap to your ass, leaving your face burning with humiliation.

What if a neighbor saw?

The squeal of a door opening drew your attention. Inside the apartment, Sukuna slammed the door behind you two, swiftly moving to his room. You were thrown unceremoniously on the bed, bouncing twice from the force. When the brief dizziness subsided, you looked up at the man still standing at the edge of the bed. He had stripped off his jacket, tossing it aside onto a chair somewhere nearby.

“You seemed pretty intent on putting on a little show earlier,” Sukuna leaned forward, resting his hands on the bed. “You all bluff or what?”

Bluff? You wanted to scoff. You didn’t start something you wouldn’t finish. Besides, you had some skills up your sleeve you figured Sukuna didn’t think you possessed- he obviously thought you were some goody-two shoes lovesick idiot. You kicked off your heels, pulling your hair up and retying it out of the way as you got up on your knees.

“Oh?”

Sukuna’s voice was amused. He still thought you were bluffing if his tone was anything to go by. He probably assumed you had seen a porno where a girl had done the same thing. Probably assumed you were a virgin.

Bastard.

You weren’t as inexperienced as he believed you to be. You may have been three years younger than him, but you had slept around a bit. Honestly, you wondered how many girls he pulled anyway with his brusque demeanor.

Your hands worked at his pants as you slid off the bed to get on your knees. Sukuna was already hard, his dick resting heavily in your hand as you pulled him out. He had nothing to be ashamed of, and you started mentally tallying how long it would take you to adjust to him and be able to get most, if not all, down your throat. He didn’t seem like the kind of guy to be gentle even with someone who wasn’t experienced, so you prepared yourself accordingly.

“It ain’t gonna bite ya-” Sukuna’s eye roll was cut off as you licked a stripe from the base of his dick to the tip. He hissed, digging a hand into your hair.

You didn’t dignify him with a reply, too occupied with pressing kisses and kitten licks to the hot skin. You even branched out and kissed the crease where his thigh met his hip, biting at it gently. You could hear a huff of laughter above you.

“I ain’t your lover, no need for all that.”

You were getting sick of his little commentary and swallowed the tip, enjoying the way it forced Sukuna to grit his teeth against a moan. Pulling off you glared up at him.

“How about you shut up and let me do my job,” you dug your thumbnail into his hip, leaving a crescent shaped mark in its wake.

“Didn’t take you for a feisty bitch,” he pulled your head back by your hair.

You couldn’t help the quiet whimper escaping your throat. As much as you wanted to snap a reply, you returned to kissing the skin of his dick, purposefully avoiding the head. He deserved to suffer a little. You could tell he was getting impatient; the hand in your hair was twitching. You dragged your tongue along his length with an excruciating slowness, listening to the way his breath hitched above you.

“If you don’t fucking-”

You enveloped his dick in your hot mouth, effectively cutting off all complaints as you switched from slow and tantalizing to a measured pace. You swirled your tongue around the head, pausing to pay extra attention to the underside of the head. You head bobbed, taking in more of his length each time you went down, gauging your gag reflex with each stroke. You were good until the last inch or so, feeling your throat and chest seize up as your airway was cut off as you went down. You pulled off completely to catch your breath, risking a glance up at Sukuna.

The sight went straight to your core.

Sukuna’s eyes were lidded, face flushed with pleasure, and mouth parted as he panted. There was a conflicted look on his face that quickly morphed into a scowl when he realized you were looking up at him.

“Did I say to stop?”

You couldn’t help the smirk that crept onto your face. He was acting like a petulant child- a brat. You wrapped a hand around his dick- still slick with your spit- and began stoking languidly, smiling sweetly up at him.

“That’s not how you ask for things you want, is it?”

“You’re a fucking tease,” Sukuna growled, shoving your face towards his dick with the hand still buried in your locks.

“I know,” you pressed a kiss to the tip, still stroking him. “Now why don’t you ask nicely?”

Sukuna hauled you up by your hair, pressing a vicious kiss against your mouth, teeth catching on your lips and drawing a bead of blood. Your body was forced onto the bed, his arms caging you in. His breathing was labored enough to prove you had an effect on him, which pleased you.

“Like hell I’ll beg,” he clamped down on the juncture between your shoulder and neck.

You bit back your groan of pleasure as a thrill ran over your skin. Your body was stripped of clothes in an instant, his hands holding your hips in place as he situated himself between your legs. He didn’t bother checking if you were wet, or to even attempt any kind of foreplay. You narrowed your eyes.

“Well I can see why you can’t keep a girlfriend,” you scoffed, rolling your eyes.

Sukuna paused. He looked irritated.

“What the hell makes you say that?”

“You think one kiss and a hickey makes a girl wet enough for you to slide in?” you propped yourself up on your elbows. “Especially since you aren’t wearing a fucking condom and I doubt you have lube laying around.”

Sukuna didn’t have the decency to look ashamed, his frown growing wider.

“Well what the fuck do you want me to do?”

“You could try finding the clit, but I doubt you’d be able to,” you flopped down onto your back, disappointment heavy in your chest.

You didn’t know why you’d expected a selfish asshole to be able to please a woman, but you thought he had to know at least a little. You were feeling shitty enough as it was with how the night had gone down, and you probably wouldn’t even be able to get off.

You jumped a little when a hand brushed over your neatly trimmed curls, Sukuna’s thumb bumping against your hood. A whine escaped your throat when he gently pulled it back, sliding across your sensitive nub.

“What was that about not finding your clit?”

You did your best to scowl at him, but his thumb was moving in paced circles, leaving you squirming.

“Shut up,” you bit out. “If a girl has to tell y-ah!”

Sukuna was a touch clumsy, but it wasn’t bad by any means. You lost yourself in the sensation, the coil in your stomach starting to wind as you felt the need to be filled growing stronger with each pass of his finger.

“You wet enough now?”

The words drew you back to the present and you looked at Sukuna, eyes lidded. You were placated enough to nod, watching as he lined himself up. He held no qualms when it came to shoving himself in, not giving you time to adjust. Your back arched and your fingers dug into the dark bedsheets, teeth gritting against the sudden intrusion. There was no time to catch your breath. Sukuna set the pace hard and fast, short cries leaving your lips with each thrust.

The man had strength and stamina, you had to admit. His grip on your hips left red marks from how hard he held them. The drag of his length against your insides had your eyes rolling back into your skull.

God, it had been a while since you’d been fucked hard and fast like this. Even when you did hook up with someone, it was usually over quickly. Sukuna showed no signs of slowing and hadn’t blown his load in the first few pumps, which was a win in and of itself, but you were growing more and more impressed as he manhandled you over onto your hands and knees.

“Fuck, and here I thought you were a virgin,” Sukuna grunted as you keened, back arched and ass pressed back against him. “But you’ve-nngh!- obviously done this before.”

Your face was buried in the mattress, but you turned your head to the side to look behind you at the tattooed man rearranging your guts with a gaze split between irritation and debauchery.

“You think a virgin could’ve sucked your dick like that?”

Every other word was punctuated with a gasp as he hammered into you with ferocity. He didn’t seem to like your back talk, shoving your head back down into the sheets and angling himself deeper until your muffled cries turned from pleasure to borderline pain. You tapped frantically on the arm holding your head down, but were ignored. The repeated assault on your cervix did nothing to make you feel good, instead causing painful cramps with each thrust.

Sukuna finally relented, flipping you back over. You were pissed off, face contorted into anger.

“That hurt,” you hissed, kicking at him.

“Don’t be so sensitive, Christ,” Sukuna grabbed your leg and hauled it over his shoulder. “Just take it like a good little whore.”

The tone he took only made your irritation grow, and you tried to kick him off with your other leg, which was quickly commandeered as well. Sukuna folded you back over on yourself, legs over his shoulders.

“Stop whining and just enjoy it,” he snapped at you. “God, I wouldn’t have brought you back if I’d know you’d be this picky about how you get fucked.”

His nose was brushing yours now as you faced him. Your frown and lowered brows were mirrored above you in Sukuna’s features. The snap of his hips against yours grew pleasant again now that you weren’t in pain, and the frown disappeared as your lip snagged between your teeth in a muffled whimper.

“Better?” Sukuna asked sarcastically, although you could tell he was holding back a moan.

“That feels good,” you conceded, trying to sink back into the pleasant feeling that had eluded you earlier.

“You’re prettier to look at when you aren’t bitching,” Sukuna panted, lowering his lips to yours to cut off any indignant reply.

His lips were hot against yours, tongue invading your mouth with insistence. You replied in kind, nipping at his lower lip.

“And you’re not half bad when you aren’t being an asshole,” you breathed when the two of you pulled back.

“That so?” Sukuna snapped his hips against yours.

The choked off cry that left your chest seemed to please the man, and he repeated the action. Each moan was like honey in his ears.

Yuuji really lost out on this girl, Sukuna grinned, biting the soft skin of your inner thigh.

Since the moment you’d started showing up at the apartment to hang with his brother, Sukuna had his eye on you. Your obvious crush on Yuuji had irritated him. Yuuji was just so fucking dense. The kid wouldn’t have noticed you wanted him if you’d splayed yourself out on his bed in lingerie. Sukuna had half a mind to tell his brother, but found he enjoyed watching you struggle to get the attention you so desired. Besides, if Yuuji rejected you, that meant that he wouldn’t see you around anymore, and Sukuna hadn’t liked that idea. But Yuuji started dating someone else, and that left you hung out to dry. Sukuna had wondered how long it would take for the news to spread and your heart to be shattered.

Maybe he was a shit person for waiting around eagerly to see you slink dejectedly out of the bar so he could sink his teeth into you. You’d taken his bait, and even seemed interested in him.

Women with broken hearts were easy to snag.

But you’d thrown him for a loop. The demure, shy girl he'd witnessed yearning for his brother was nowhere to be found. You were demanding, argumentative, and gave him shit. Normally he wouldn’t have entertained the kind of behavior you’d thrown at him. His own pride and stubbornness lent him to toss out anyone who didn’t just comply, but he couldn’t bring himself to make you leave even after your scathing comments about his supposed incompetence in turning you on. He reluctantly gave into your desires, although he couldn’t help his sadistic streak when it came to punishing you for the words you’d cut him with. He reveled in the way he could silence your complaints by drowning them in pleasure.

“S’kuna!”

Hearing his name paired with the way you clenched around him had Sukuna gritting his teeth in an attempt to stave off his impending orgasm. Your legs had gone rigid, shaking with exertion as you writhed against him.

Sukuna, in an uncharacteristic act of kindness, moved his hand down to your clit, carefully flicking it with his finger while you held back a wail. Your coherence was quickly disappearing the closer you sped towards your release, and Sukuna was determined to have you finish first. Amid the panting and groaning, through the haze of his mounting ecstasy, he heard the front door rattle as it shut.

Yuuji must be home.

Sukuna couldn’t help the wolfish grin that spread over his features as he redoubled his efforts. Your cries grew louder as your back arched and his name fell from your pretty lips, crashing into his ears with a sweet whine. The second he felt you spasm around him, Sukuna was unable to hold back any longer. Your insides were painted with white, Sukuna still thrusting into you through it all as curses flew from his mouth.

Your chest heaved, covered by a sheen of sweat in the receding afterglow, Sukuna’s body still enveloping yours in a crushing embrace. He rolled off of you when you whimpered, tapping his shoulder. The air in the room was crushingly hot and humid. Sukuna pulled his boxers on, immediately heading to the door. He didn’t even give you time to cover yourself before he flung it open, crossing his arms and raising his brows.

Yuuji was standing in the hallway, rooted to the spot with a flush across his entire face, whether from being caught eavesdropping on the situation, or for some other reason. His eyes were the size of saucers, mouth agape as he stared past his brother at where you lay, suddenly snapped back down to earth and reaching for something to provide you with a modicum of modesty.

“It’s late, you should get to bed,” Sukuna didn’t bother to even close the door a bit to block Yuuji from looking in, as if he was gloating.

“W-why is Y/N-”

“Because,” Sukuna’s face filled with malicious pleasure. His chin lifted so he could look down his nose at the horrified face of his younger brother. “You're an idiot, and I’m not.”

[theaawalker]

A Run For Your Money [Eric x Reader]

Pairing: Eric x gender-neutral!reader Song Inspo: One Dance by Drake ft. Justin Bieber Word Count: 2,004 Summary: A new Dauntless initiate, y/n, captures Eric's attention. As trouble follows you, Eric is always nearby with a keen smirk. But you won't go down without a fight, promising to give the brutal faction AND instructor a run for their money. Warnings: violence, fighting, mentions of death Masterlist: see fandoms (pc-friendly)

Bam! Bam-bam, bam!

You are by yourself in the initiate training room beating on a punching bag. Today is one the rare days off that initiates get, and you chose to spend your time training. You made up your mind to transfer to this faction, so you did't intend to ease up on your pursuit until you make the cut. It seems that a group of female initiates were attracted by the punching sounds and have come to investigate. After seeing you, one of them attempts to show you how it's done.

Jace is bigger than her friends; one would assume that she was Dauntless born had the classes not been separated. She picks you up and throws you to the side, ready to set an example. You come back, jump and hock a leg around her neck, flipping her on her back to the ground. You land in a crouch, "Come on dude, don't be an asshole."

It's obvious that she nor her friends expected you to take her down. They thought that you would be intimidated like most of the other initiates, but Jace didn't hold her surprise for long.

"Well, that was unexpected, but not entirely unwelcome." She pushes off the floor and hops to her feet. You rise up with her as they meet for a handshake.

"Jace, Candor."

"Y/N." You turn away from her to go drink from your water bottle. Jace watches you for a moment.

"Which faction are you from, Y/N?" She asks. You blink and drink from your bottle before setting it back down.

"That's not important." You say. Jace isn't satisfied with your answer and is about to ask you another question.

"I couldn't agree more." The girls stiffen and jerk around to face Eric, posted up like a soldier with a sadistic glare in his eyes. "Do any of you want to explain to me why you're not downstairs?" His voice is menacing and full of authority. Jace and her friends look at each other confused. One of them tries to respond, but she's a stuttering mess.

"Bu-but w-w-we uh, I thought um.. I mean, we uh-."

Eric, having heard enough, cuts her off, "Got it. I'll give you a chance to make it down there, and you'd better make it before I get back down there." The girls scramble past him and rush down the stairs. You hadn't moved, choosing to remain silent until they had gone.

"Isn't today our day off?" You look at Eric expectantly. You aren't surprised when he starts grinning at you.

"Correct." He's walking towards you while shrugging off his jacket.

"Then why did you scare them away?" He smirks at the question and sets his jacket down near your water bottle.

"I'll be your sparring partner for today." You blink slowly.

"Alright."

2 hours later, you and Eric are both sweaty on the mats, breathing heavily as you stretch together.

"Thanks for the workout." Eric was impressed with you, and he's looking forward to welcoming you into Dauntless.

"No problem, I really enjoyed it. Thank you." You didn't expect the offer, but you appreciated it. Eric isn't known to associate with initiates outside of making sure Four is training them properly. So, while surprised that he wanted to spar, you weren't going to say no.

He nodded his head at you, grabbed his jacket and walked away. You watched him leave, strutting out of the training room with such confidence. He didn't even look like someone who'd been in a fight. You honestly feel inspired. One day, you're going to really give him a run for his money.

[ time skip - visitng day ]

When visiting day rolls around, Eric doesn't see his source of amusement. He wanders into the training room to see you finishing a set of pull ups. He stands in the entry way watching you come down to stretch. You bend down to the front, holds it, and then bend back into a back-bend.

You see him but don't say anything. You don't know how long he's been standing there watching, but since he didn't say anything neither will you. You take a few minutes to quickly stretch your body before picking up your water bottle and walking away. You almost makes it past him, but he stretches out an arm to stop you.

"Not so fast." You aren't looking at him, but he's looking at you. "Why aren't you down there with everyone else?"

"There's no one down there for me." You walk around him, and he lets you go. He sees that you're upset, but it isn't his place to comment on it.

[ time skip - next day ]

Early the next morning, Eric comes across you doing laps around the training room. You pause at seeing him there.

"You want to run?" You nod, your chest heaving with your breathing. "Come with me." You look around, unsure if you should follow him.

"I have training in an hour." He smirks at you.

"I'll make sure you're back in time." You nod again and follow him.

They run to a cliff spot with a full view of the sunrise. You hadn't watched the sunrise since being in Dauntless; you missed it. You wonder if this could be a regular thing for you again.

"Ready to head back?" You nod. "Can I come here every morning?" He regards you for a moment before replying.

"If you remember the way."

They jog back together and make it just in time for Four's class. You head over to join the other initiates lined up. Eric walks past them, ignoring Four completely as he heads to take a shower.

The next morning, you're running back to the Dauntless compound, coming back from your sunrise viewing. You're definitely going to make it part of your routine to run there in the mornings. Halfway back to the compound, you see Eric running toward you. You pass each other, making eye contact but not exchanging words or stopping.

[ time skip ]

Despite their rocky start, you and Jace form a competitive friendship. You're often seen sparring with one another, or with Jace's friends. With individual training, you two are always trying to out-do the other. Friendly competition became a great way for the both of you to become and maintain high ranks among the initiates.

Lately, Four has the group randomly paired every day for mock fights in the ring. Somehow, you always get paired with one of Jace's friends. You haven't lost a fight yet thanks to all the practice you had with Jace. The friend, Byron, was the biggest initiate of the class, so taking down anyone else was easier for you. Bruised, blustered, and bloodied, you managed to beat him. Even Four was impressed, with Eric nodding and smirking like he predicted your victory. Byron seemed pissed as he limped back to his spot. The fact of Jace teasing him didn't make it any better. Perhaps that was the catalyst that led to this unfortunate event.

[ time skip - that night ]

You were already in bed while everyone else was at dinner. You're an early riser which also means you're an early sleeper. That particular day had tired you out more than usual, so you slept heavy enough for someone to pick you up, cradle-style, and carry you away.

The culprits? Three men disguised in all black and ski masks who tried to dump you over the chasm.

One of the Dauntless members on the cameras sees them. He's in the camera room watching them almost drop you over until you wake up suddenly. Kicking and punching, you swing around on the railing to kick one of your attackers in the head. He hits the back wall and falls unconscious. One of them somehow is shoved over chasm railing, while you punch the other one in the throat and head until they fall. You snatch off the masks of the remaining two, and your face crumbles. Hurt and betrayed to see two of Jace's friends. You recognize Byron, and knee on the other one's dick. He tries to cover himself, but you kick his head, hammering down on it with both feet. As a floored Byron and his accomplices groan, you spit on him as a final assault before you stagger up and stalk off.

Four and Eric coincidentally show up in the camera room while this fight was taking place. Four notices that particular camera feed as he glances around the room when he first walks in. He immediately zeroed in on it, coming closer as he sees the victim, who he recognized as you, wake up and fight off their assailants. Four flips out, snapping at the guy sitting in front of him for not reporting this.

Eric, at seeing Four agitated, walks over behind him to see you in action. He finds it humorous, not caring at all about the sorry excuse for an initiate that fell over. Lucky him that he died before Eric could get to him. Those other two would pay dearly for what they just attempted, then maybe after he's done with them will he allow them to die.

Four tries to go to the chasm, but Eric tells him to take care of the guy in front of him first. "It's over now; I'll take care of them."

Eric tells the swarming Dauntless members to get those two initiates in a holding room until he gets there. Eric left the room in search of you, but he couldn't find you. Unbeknownst to him, he passed your hiding spot -- a hallway vent -- several times, but you didn't want to reach out to him. You saw a mix of other Dauntless members and initiates milling around, and you didn't trust them. So, instead, you tucked yourself deeper into your hiding hole and slept.

[ time skip - the next morning ]

You return to your bunk after you've calmed down. Jace tries to approach you, but you flinch away from her. Who's to say she didn't orchestrate the attack? Shortly after, Four, with Eric right on his heels, sped into the room. He's relieved to find you there, and he asks if you could come with them.

You're called to a meeting with the Dauntless leaders, the parents of the dead boy, and for some reason, Jeanine Matthews. The child's mother accused you of killing her son.

"Your son tried to kill me." His mother vehemently denied it, until she's shown the video feed. Then, she flips her argument.

"But you're not dead, now are you?" You, done with the conversation already, looks over at her.

"Let me guess, you'd rather I be dead."

"Yes!"

"Tough." You turn your head, dismissing her.

Eric is full-on grinning as the mother is short circuiting. Jeanine, ever observant of Eric and his mannerisms, notices Eric's interest in you. Thus, Jeanine also takes an interest in you. Reviewing in her mind the initiate's combat skills, she shifts her eyes over to you, who is busy staring out of the window. You could be another Eric, a great soldier to carry out her plans.

After much debate, mainly from the parents' end, you are dismissed. Due to the video evidence of the boy being involved with trying to kill you, and that he was actually bumped over by one of the boys, you are exempt from any punishment.

After the meeting, Jeanine pulls Eric to the side. He instead takes her to his office to hear what she has to say. She asks Eric what he thinks of you, to which Eric responds with a mediocre answer. He doesn't want you involved in this, but it seems his tactic isn't working. Jeanine doesn't buy it after seeing the video, and she gives Eric instructions to introduce you to the plans and get you working under him. After, she excuses herself and leaves him alone to his thoughts.

After lunch, Four escorts you to Eric's office. Four warns him not to be mean to you, and Eric tells him to get the fuck out of his office. During your meeting with Eric, he tells you the rundown of what's going to happen after you've passed your initiation. He doesn't go into too much detail, in case you have too much of an adverse reaction.

After he's done explaining, you're blunt with him, "That's stupid." Eric looks at you, but you keep your eyes on his computer and continues, "It doesn't make sense. She wants to kill people to keep the peace. And these serums, it sounds like some mind control scheme."

You look at Eric. He sees that you're smart enough to pick up on what he didn't say.

"You don't believe her, right?" You ask him. "You know that she wants to make everyone, except a select few, into mindless slaves that do whatever she wants while she rules over everything. You know that she wants a dictatorship and not peace, right?"

You pause for a moment to hone in on his unfazed expression. "Or maybe you do know, but you don't care." You look at him for a few more moments before leaning up and looking away, taking a stroll around his office.

He contemplates life while you busy yourself with looking around his office. How didn't he think about what life would be like with everyone under her new serum? He thought that he'd be done with Jeanine, and he could do whatever he wanted with Dauntless. He didn't care about the other factions. He really doesn't care about the people, but there's not much enjoyment in bossing around mindless slaves who are programmed to do what they're told anyway. How weird it would be to walk down the halls and pass people that aren't really there. Yes, there'd be no more people to piss him off, but there'd be no idiot to amuse him either. No one to hold a conversation with; no one to ignore for being stupid; and no one to threaten and watch them cower.

At that moment, he realizes that he would be bored and alone with not a soul for company other than Jeanine and her lackeys. He grimaces at the thought and sees how unpleasant it would be. He feels ignorant for not seeing the whole picture and not thinking ahead. He's going to rectify that.

[ time skip ]

It took Eric a few weeks to get together his evidence of Jeanine's crimes and organize a trial in Candor. It was unavoidable for some of his skeletons to be exposed, but fortunately, they were overlooked in light of him turning Jeanine in. She was found guilt and set to be executed, which was done by Eric himself immediately after the sentencing.

You passed your initiation ranked #1, with Jace pulling up #2. It took you a while to feel comfortable around her again, but ultimately, it wasn't her who hurt you. Thus, it wasn't fair for you to shut her out. Plus, she physically defended you whenever one of the guys got too aggressive with you, which was a nice plus.

You were also set to start your job working under Eric. The paperwork had already been approved by the time Jeanine's plans were foiled. Also, Eric had taken to courting you. Speaking to you more and spending time with you. He wouldn't date you until after you passed initiation, but now that you had, you and Eric have been together for about 3 weeks now. He was currently taking you to meet his parents for dinner.

Five minutes in, and you were not having a good time. Still, at least there was free food. Eric's mother, Blythe, addressing you, asks yet another insulting question. "So, how long have you been sleeping with my son?"

"Blythe!" Eric and his father shout her name, but you ignore her.

"Not going to answer?"

"No, I don't see how that's any of your business."

Taken aback, Blythe seethes before responding. "My son is my business."

"Yea, you're such a great parent, so supportive of your son's choices." You hear her gasp as you sip your water, not giving her the attention.

"How dare you-"

"That's enough," Eric hisses at her. He's pleased that you're not intimidated by his mother, but he doesn't like her being insulted.

"Are you going to eat that?" Eric asks you, eyeing your plate. You cut the steak and broccoli on his plate and fork it before turning to offer it to him. You have your other hand underneath in case anything falls from the fork. He eyes you again and you blink at him expectantly. He leans in, his eyes boring into yours as he eats off your fork. You turn back to spear more food onto the fork before turning to repeat your actions.

"I can eat my own food." He says while leaning in.

"Then why didn't you?"

As the night goes on, you two pay no mind to his parents. Even though Eric's father seems to genuinely support him, you don't see any sort of relationship blossoming with him or his wife. Yet, judging by Eric's reaction to Blythe, you won't have to worry about pleasing her. Sweet.

• ♧ • ♧ • ♧ • ♧ • ♧ • ♧ • ♧ • ♧ • ♧ • ♧ •

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[ladyloveroll]

(These are my ACTUAL notes from my friends birthday party full of people who absolutely did not know who the fuck Itachi and Kisame were or how pairing names work or what a ship is.)

Writing kisaita (on and off) for 15 years

Never get tired of the ship

Excellent, friendly people in the fandom to keep making content (Cynni)

Presentation is less about the specific ship and more about the general qualities that make their ship S-tier. You may find this echoed in your own OTP, IDK.

Powerful, badass characters who can kick anyones asses no problem, as depicted where they are casually taking a stroll after Kisame (who still has his little fo-hawk) casually takes down the four-tails

Kisame is noted as the ‘tail-less jinchuuriki’

Itachi is clearly a fucking powerhouse, we don’t need to debate that

Working with strong characters means you are more easily able to portray their weakness and explore that side of them since that rarely gets screentime

Auxiliary, not main characters

Main characters are harder to write because they spend a lot of screen time accomplishing their goal and doing Plot

Auxiliary characters are more malleable, and morally gray ones especially so

Depicted here are Itachi and Kisame, separately, being ordered by their villages to kill their own people. They carry this order out, but do not particularly like it. Nor are they particularly loyal to their own villages, despite carrying this order out. It’s hard to say where their loyalities lie.

The answer is WITH EACH OTHER OBVIOUSLY

Any ship that has a timeskip has LOADS of canon-verse material you can work with, especially if it feels like the characters have changed or their dynamic has changed.

For Naruto especially, WTF are Kisame and Itachi doing for three years? Clearly neither of them are out capturing jinchuriki. They aren’t seen lounging around Amegakure or Akatsuki headquarters. They are just traveling the world. Probably doing hits. Probably hitting on EACH OTHER WOOOOOO

Long time skips mean a few thing: 1) Canon divergence, 2) Canon compliant, 3) pre-time skip, 4) during time skip, 5) post time-skip; and that’s not even the AU’s

They clearly haven’t made any other friends during this time either so lots of relationship to explore

The Naruto franchise is notorious for retconning. Probably because Kishimoto (the writer) was pushed to create at a pace that was impossible for any sane or healthy man to keep up with.

Fanficition writers can take advantage of this poor writing by interpreting the character in a lot more ways than if the character was solidly written.

There are a lot of different ways Kisame is written, and accepted as so

Itachi less so but we don’t have time for that

Retconning allows you to take a writers mistake and turn it into utter brainrot that ten other people (me) will reblog every 3 years

This one is kind of specific, but if you like angst then OH BOY this ship has a lot of potential for it

Any OTP that involves an angsty edgelord and a sadistic tagalong can indulge in either EXTRA ANGST and be able to balance out the angst with humor

The KisaIta ship has 4 great themes about it:

Redemption

Acceptance

Forgiveness

And Existentialism of course

Dynamic:

Sharkboy / lava girl

Edgelord / goof

Leader / follower

Maybe old? / a touch too young

Respect for each other

S-tier OTP because of strong themes and repeatable dynamics

Kinkfest here we come

S-tier OTPs must be able to withstand an intense variety of smut writing

Powerful level = able to handle pain and dish out pain

Body things? = more positions

The Shape of Water was one of the single best thing to happen to the KisaIta 18+ fics because (even though it existed before the movie came out) a lot more readers were into it now

Also, Kisame makes this ship work more than Itachi. He is fucking DEVOTED

at this point I was running out of my 10-minutes (THEY HAD THE AUDACITY TO PUT ME ON A TIMER) so i just backfilled the rest of the presentation with fanart and memes i like

Why do I like KisaIta?

I mostly write smut

They’re great at smut

I also like angst

They’re always great for angst, either character

Also look at them they are hot AF

Beefcake service-top vs. ‘shaped like a katana’ masochist

Healthy dose of hurt-comfort

They’re extremely flexible to write and so there’s a lot of stories you can create

thank you for not reporting me to the powerpoint police

[sleepingdeath-light]

the perfect gentleman ; 18+

requested by ; anonymous (kinktober entry)

word count ; 1544

content ; sexually explicit content, loss of virginity, vaginal fingering, vaginal sex, prominent sadism (alastor) and masochism (reader), power imbalance

fandom ; hazbin hotel

pairing ; alastor x cis female reader

read also on ; ao3

note ; potentially shaky characterisation as i had to juggle alastor’s likely sadism with trying to be accommodating for someone’s first time, which was quite the challenge.

minors and ageless blogs will be blocked!!!

Alastor was a great many things to a great many people, but above all else he was a gentleman — and a very traditional one at that. The type who would do the expected chivalrous things like hold open doors for you even when he was just passing by, or lending you his tailcoat if you complained of the cold, but his gentlemanliness also extended to the more intimate side of your relationship (which shouldn’t be as surprising as it was, but seeing as you were both in hell you couldn’t help but be even more appreciative of how he approached things like that).

And even now that you’d finally made yourself open to being sexually intimate he was still treating you with a degree of gentleness that made your undead heart flutter. Though you supposed that was mostly because you’d disclosed your inexperience to him quite early on in your relationship — after all he was a self described sadist so you’d been expecting a bit more roughness once he got you in bed with him.

Not that you minded much, of course…

—————

Despite being in such a vulnerable position you felt completely at ease beneath him, fully giving yourself to him however you could and however he wanted you to: not flinching away when he used the sharpened tips of his black tinged claws to impatiently, yet delicately, tear your undergarments off of your body; letting him reposition your body so that you were sat on his lap with your bare back right against his slender clothed chest without complaint; spreading your legs wider, almost on impulse, when he started to trail those cold hands up your thighs and towards your wet pussy; complying immediately and removing your hands from your mouth when he scolded you for trying to hide yourself from him, letting your arms fall limply to your sides as you started to anxiously pick at the bedsheets on either side of his crossed legs, whole body trembling in anticipation as he inches closer and closer to the apex of your thighs. And despite all of your mental preparation you still couldn’t help but jump when he first made contact with your slit, earning you a crackling radio-host chuckle against your ear as he repeated the same motion again to help you adjust to it; slowly and gently running a single fingertip along your slit from the hood of your clit to your dripping hole and back again.

He asked you if you wanted him to stop, calling you ‘dear’ in that polite drawl of his, but you pushed through your anxiety and confirmed that you were okay. So Alastor pushed forwards by just a bit; letting one of his fingertips dip mere millimetres into your entrance before immediately removing it and continuing to trace the length of your soaked puffy lips, mindful to not cut you with his nails as he went (he had clipped them beforehand but there’s only so much a demon can do to change his form, you know). Then he did it again, going a fraction deeper and staying a second longer, before pulling out again — going further and further with every go around and clearly delighting in your flustered frustration and anxiety as he continued to tease you and help you adjust to what was to come.

But, so very impatient despite your initial anxiety, you only lasted long enough for him to get the second knuckle of his middle finger into your gushing entrance before you tapped out and begged him to stop ‘treating me like I’m made of glass, Al,’ because you’re ‘a demon too, goddamn it’. And Alastor, ever the perfect gentleman, laughed heartily at your outburst before withdrawing his hands from your body and putting his finger in front of your lips and asking you to ‘be a doll’ and clean him up first.

So, tentatively, and with a half-heartedly defiant roll of your eyes, you parted your lips and allowed him to push his slick covered digit into your mouth. Tasting yourself on his skin as you obediently cleaned him, humming almost thoughtfully at the flavour, until he suddenly popped it back out of your mouth and unceremoniously (and quite roughly) flipped you onto your back so that you were laying flat on the bed with him looming over you, body positioned snugly between your legs.

Once again he asked if you wanted him to continue, voice crackling like static and eyes glowing that intrusive streetlight yellow as he stared down at you with his usual sharp grin on his face. And, once again, you glared up at him and huffed and reaffirmed that you knew what you wanted — and that you didn’t want him holding back like he was before.

And it seemed that that was all the encouragement that the radio demon needed to make your first time as memorable as possible.

—————

You felt like his prey, trapped and completely at his mercy, but you couldn't help but love it: those needle-like teeth digging in to the sensitive skin of your throat, piercing just deep enough to draw blood and make you gasp before he withdrew and licked the wound clean, moaning in satisfaction at your flavour; those talon like fingers clawing at your bare waist and hips and thighs, keeping you in place and stopping you from squirming away from him as he fucked into your soaking wet pussy, slick mixing with blood as it pooled beneath you on the bed; that long slender cock slipping effortlessly inside of you, tip brushing dangerously against your g-spot every few thrusts and coaxing more moans and groans and whines from your lips as he went, all of which Alastor clearly revelled in. He was so much stronger than you, so much larger than you, that there was no chance of you escaping — leaving you well and truly at the mercy of your demonic deer-like lover — and the thought only made you wetter.

In fact, everything he did or said to you made you wet, which might have embarrassed you if you weren't already in hell.

Every staticky laugh and chuckle that reverberated against the pulse point of your neck or the swell of your chest. Deep, rough sounds that sent waves of gooseflesh erupting across your body and that were usually followed by another playful bite or nip.

Every time he called you 'my dear' or 'pet' or 'dearest' in that transatlantic accent of his, terms of affection that would usually make you swoon now left to punctuate the little things he did to make you see stars on the ceiling of your crumbling hotel room. His sweet words a stark contrast to the utter sin that he was performing between your thighs.

Every sharp sting of his nails being dug into your hips and dragged down a few tantalising centimetres, leaving deep red trails in your skin  in their wake that the small, distant, coherent part of you knew would ache terribly the next day. But now, with his lips on your throat and his cock in your cunt, you couldn't bring yourself to care about the consequences you'd face, you just needed him to do it again... and again... and again. He could leave every inch of you bruised and bleeding and you still wouldn't care so long as he kept making you feel this good — hell, the pain only made the pleasure feel more real, more intense, so you almost hoped that he didn't stop.

Every collision of his hips with yours, angled just right so the tip of his length would hit that delicate spongey-spot within you, that had you throwing your head back and repeating his name like a mantra or prayer (rather ironic given your current place of residence).

All of these new overwhelming sensations pushed you closer and closer to the edge of release until finally something snapped and you were sent spiralling into a climax so intense your vision completely whited out. Every nerve in your body felt like it was on fire and yet you still felt like you were floating, adrift in an ocean of burning hot pleasure that drowned out your thoughts and left you only with the sharp stinging pain of his teeth and nails to anchor you through the storm. Even your own voice sounded distant and incomprehensible to you, like your ears were stuffed with cotton or your head was underwater, leaving only the pounding of your heart audible to you as you were fucked through your climax.

It was intense and felt almost endless, like you were kept in that state of heightened sensation and white hot pleasure for an eternity. Floating in that white, teary void with only your own overwhelming pleasure and distant, dull sparks of pain to keep you company as you rode out the most powerful orgasm of your life. Only able to mindlessly hope that it would be the first of many that you’d have with Alastor, and that some day you’d be able to make him feel just as good as you did now.

Just maybe not today; you were much too worn out for that… but there’s always tomorrow, right?

[kaeyachi]

Kaeyappreciation post!

Kaeya is wonderful in a sense that he:

Has a penmanship described as "Beautiful Handwriting". He for sure worked on that.

Willingly spends his time making sure his outfit looks perfect

Is well-loved by Mondstadt and the Dawn Winery staff

Is described to like a prince, both in looks and in actions

Is shown to be gentle and caring to children and elderly, most seen with Klee and the staff from Dawn Winery

Is a great listener and, therefore, also knows what gifts to buy based off of something someone said in passing

Is predominantly kind- unafraid to help out and defend someone in need. His first reaction is always kindness, and worry about covering up that kindness later on

But Kaeya also has his moments where he:

Says things out of pocket with enough alcohol in his system. Things that usually lead to shame and regret.

Would rather give others the credit for his hard work if he could help it

Intentionally makes himself look suspicious by withholding information and only throwing tidbits that are not of substance

Has sadist tendencies, which affects how he treats both his (cavalry) company and his enemies

Can and will use underhanded tactics to gain the upper hand

Rarely ever says what he truly wants to say

Has a fake smile. Usually lies or only deals with half truths.

He is such a complex character. I really do want people to appreciate him and his intricacies more. The fact that his entire personality and story is done so well and continues to actually grow and expand as the story progresses is something that genuinely makes me want to keep watch of him. I have never, in all my fandoms, stuck to a character as long as I did with Kaeya, and honestly? I know I'm not alone with this.

Look at how well they made our boy!

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

GOOD OMENS MASCOT HERE, IT'S MY ONE MONTH ANNIVERSARY ON TUMBLR!

HELLO MAGGOTS I'VE BEEN ON TUMBLR A MONTH (CAN'T REMEMBER WHETHER I JOINED ON 21 OR 22 DECEMBER, SO I'M MAKING THIS POST NEAR MIDNIGHT 21 JAN MY TIME)!

I felt like I should make some sort of post but I am really not sure what to say. And for those of you who may not know, yes I only joined tumblr a month ago. I only was kidnapped into the Good Omens fandom three weeks ago.

For those of you running across this post having no idea who I am, hello, I'm Asmi (uhz-mee), I'm the Official Good Omens Mascot because the fandom decided to uh adopt me as their son, and also am hailed as prophet here. Aside from that clearly scintillating resume, in real life I'm an author, artist and designer.

A brief description of What Happened: I joined tumblr to make a friend or something and spread chaos. A week later, I realised Good Omens was all over my dash but I had no idea what it was, so I made a summary based on what I'd gathered from the screaming. I hoped someone would enlighten me. I had no idea who David Tennant was. Or Michael Sheen.

Instead, 24 hours later and the fandom made an executive decision to kidnap me, install me as mascot, because my sheer dumbassery amused them, and started Good Omens livestreams for me. The coming Saturday will be the final three episodes of season 2. You don't need to warn me, everyone is doing it. Offering emotional support fruit etc.

I also ventured into the Doctor Who fandom. I now know that the TARDIS is blue, not yellow.

It's been three weeks since that happened and, well, here I am. Hello, Tumblr *waves awkwardly* *recollects myself and performs an elaborate bow instead*.

@neil-gaiman also seems to have found the same sadistic amusement in my descent into utter madness as the rest of you. Sir, you have created something marvellous, but some pity would not go amiss. I've gone from not knowing who Crowley is to sobbing uncontrollably over him in three weeks while the fandom rubs their hands in pleasure.

Anyway here is a reminder to all of you maggots, that I love you very, very much, and it is only 57% Stockholm Syndrome. I really, truly love you all. CAN I GET A WAHOO FOR SURVIVING A MONTH HERE?

Cursed take by @1800ineedshelp, you are all free to consider it, if Neil follows my account, does that make him a maggot?

Do with that what you will.

[heavens-aesthetic-kitchen]

Why the TF2 Defense Trio deserve more recognition

The people have spoken, I have decided to create an essay disguised as a post on this godforsaken website because it's a free country goddammit! (I would have done it either way lmaooo, I have a lot of shit to say about these maniacs) To start this formal essay glorified very serious shitpost, why should you as a tf2 fan care about these 3 men? They're so "boring" and there's not much going on with them. If ya took a second, let's pause with what was being said. YOU MUST BE OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN MIND to think such thoughts, we must shake you out of cuckoo land by giving you an in-depth look into these three so that you understand where I'm coming from. Let's start in order:

Demoman:

After being in the fandom since 2019, there's always one character I always thought wasn't given much anything in the fandom at all. Even taking ships out of the equation, there's barely any fics I've that focus on Tavish Finneagan Degroot specifically that I've seen that isn't a compilation fic (I read a lot of x readers, don't judge me). Believe me, I checked ao3. I went through Demoman's tags and I tried very hard to filter a lot of the crossover and relationship tags, yet there's less of Demoman himself, than there's him just existing as a side character of a story. Which is honestly sad, I honestly think Demo is one of the more kinder mercs compared to a lot of the team. This man made friends with the BLU soldier, despite knowing that they were supposed to be killing each other. Sure, it's unclear whether or not Demo did actually go through with it and it's just a ruse, because the voicelines in WAR! don't have a set timeline. But I do think that Demo would have tried to keep his friendship with BLU soldier. He's very chill. I've never actually seen him get violent against his friends and family, despite being a drunkard. I honestly think he's one of the sweetest people in TF2, he takes good care of his mom and haunted sword lmaoooo. Jokes aside, he seems like a genuinely good man and I barely see anything that suggests he's sadistic. He's a chaotic and loud, but not bad. Not bad at all. The fact he can still do his job well, even after drinking so much that his body created a whole distillery, is even more impressive. He is damn good at what he does and works very hard. He's had multiple jobs, even as wee little lad. Despite what people think of him, the fact he's getting paid 5 million dollars a year, is proof he knows what he's doing. He loves his job and couldn't bear the thought of not working. I feel like his backstory isn't talked about enough in the fandom either. When you think about it, it's kinda fucked up that he was put in an orphanage by his biological parents until he was in the right age to be blowing people up. Not only that, his eye socket was haunted by the Bombinomicon so that every halloween a giant eye would manifest, attacking him and his friends. Even Medic couldn't help him and instead resorting to scooping the part of Demo's brain where he remembered so he would stop asking. He most likely has a lot of stories for you, I see him as the type that has a lot to say. His past is the most fleshed out and complete out of all the mercs, which I really appreciate, you can do a lot more with him. Also another thing, during Unhappy Returns, he took the time to reassure Soldier that he wouldn't think he's a civilian. He didn't brush Soldier's worries aside and instead comforted him. I wish I had a lot more to say about Demo because I am baffled that he isn't being gushed about as a potential partner. He has the excitement and like zero baggage. A thing I also wanna point out is that he seems to be insecure of the fact he's a black scottish man with only one eye during Meet The Demoman. I may be reading into things a bit too much, but it makes me wanna be like "NOOOO don't talk about yourself like that, bro. You're so cute UGHHH" Also also he's handsome. Sure looks can be subjective, but I still think Demo has a face I would kiss hehe. He looks great with his beard and his cheeky ass smile. GOD I could gush about him all day, but I have to move on rip.

Heavy:

Honestly, I'm having a hard time just finding the words to describe this amazing man without giving him the respect he deserves. But I'll sure try. Heavy has had a difficult life and I've always admired how strong he was. Not just of his muscles, but he endured one of the toughest situations and still kept moving forward with his life even though it was traumatizing. You see why I'm even having a hard time talking about him? I can't really get down into the weeds, without getting serious for a min. I feel like the fandom doesn't give him much credit for being able to deal with so much. He's the rock for his family after his father disappeared (atp I think he's dead, which is the cherry on top this depressing sundae) and I wouldn't doubt that he would be the same for his team. He's a man of few words, but that makes him all the more intriguing. Just because this man has a lot of brawn does not mean he's dumb at all. Despite how he acts in the battlefield, Heavy is observant and clever. Although, it's implied that Spy being Scout's dad is an open secret between the mercs and Miss Pauling, the fact he figured it out without saying it directly must mean he has a lot more going on. He's also educated, getting a phD in Russian Literature. It's not a STEM program, but he actually got a doctorate and went to college, that's a lot more than half of what the mercs did lmaooo. Also he has a bit of a softie side, not just for his mom and sisters, but also other creatures as well. I respect him so much for avoiding violence against those dogs during the Showdown comic. Not only shows what an absolute sweetheart he is, but also how much he's able to think quickly on his feet. Heavy is very direct and blunt, I don't see him as the type to lie about his feelings. I appreciate that he doesn't feel the need to sugarcoat anything, he'll get the job done and he ain't playing. There's no fluff, he knows what he wants and that's to rev up Sasha and ram through sons of bitches without any worries.

I feel like I wanna point out, his story seems the most unexplored in the fandom, even though it has a lot of potential for ANGST factor. I already broke down how sad it is, but I just feel like it isn't said enough. Can I just say how cuddly he looks?! GAH, I feel like he would give the warmest hugs! The way he smiled in Unhappy Returns when he finds out his family doesn't need to live in fear anymore, just melts my heart! He's so protective over his family and friends! I wish I had a lot more to say about this guy because I just can't stop finding more things about him that go unappreciated. I had to literally edit this part so many times before moving on, he just has those little details you don't notice until you take a second and have that OH MY GOD moment

Engineer:

I was getting so hyped, when it was finally our resident southern nerd's time to shine. GOD I have so much to say about this man. It's been over 5 fucking years and I have never stopped simping for this man since 2019, I think I'm gonna go insane from how much I've been repressing, I go feral when he's around. Anyways enough stalling. I don't ever think a fictional character has ever made me swoon quite like Engineer, I really mean that. I have ask and pleaded to whatever god was listening to give me a man like Engie. To me, he is everything I ever wanted and more.

First, I wanna talk about what makes him attractive to me. His accent. His southern charm, UGH he's killing me with that smooth voice and chivalry! I swear this man could make me faint just from existing. The way he smiles is so warm, his insults are so corny I love them. That five o clock shadow GAHH! I'm getting butterflies all over again. I swear I love all three of the defense bois, but Dell Conagher has my heart wrapped around his gunslinger metal finger. All those personal reasons aside, I've always thought Dell Conagher was a very interesting character in the world of TF2. He might not have much screen time or goofy shenanigans like the other mercs, but that doesn't mean you can ignore him oh no no no. This man is important within the whole story of Mann Co and TF industries, his grandfather being the catalyst of the game's events and the comics going forward. The Conaghers are the SOLE REASON why Team Fortress 2's story exists. I find it strange that the fandom hasn't done much with this fact because you can do a lot with this idea. Engineer knows a lot of shit and would be the biggest threat to Helen, if not for the fact that his family has been helping her for years.

Like his backstory, he's not seen much in the battlefield, but he has a lot more going on behind the scenes. Imagine the possibilities. He is damn intelligent and he knows it. While Dell is very sweet and has a southern charm, this is a facade to hide his God complex and sadistic tendencies. If you think this man is just your boring gentle engineer, you've got a big storm coming. It's heavily implied that he sawed off his own arm so that he could use the gunslinger. This man works on projects with Medic and doesn't question the moral implications of putting a human brain in a pumpkin. Hell, he threatened his own employer, even if he was an old man (Granted, Blutarch dug up his grandpa's grave, so he probably should have gotten something a lot worse than just Dell telling him to fuck off). Engineer is more than the texan egghead sweetie pie, he is a mercenary for a reason and I would argue that he might be as insane, if not more than, the rest of the team. No sane man would willingly work with a bunch of war criminals if he wasn't also crazy. That's the thing I really like about him. I love playing as him in the game because it represents his character very well. He technically serves a supportive role to the team with his buildings, but he is a killer with a lot of tools in his disposal, With the right amount of training, he can absolutely dominate in the battlefield.

I feel like he's one of the people that underestimate and assume that he's an easy target, but he's a lot more than that. He has a lot of layers that makes me want to learn more about him and what he has to offer.

In Conclusion:

These guys are cool. Lmaooo okay I won't just end it there. I genuinely believe that they're not getting the recognition that they deserve, they've got a lot more going for them if you pay attention. Sure they might not always be the loudest or most prominant character in the story, but what they lack in quantity, they make up for in quality TEN FOLD. They don't have to be your favourite, but you should at least give them a chance. You never know, they may surprise you.

Okay so thats enough of that, I couldn't find a divider above this message, so you're getting this grainy ass gif. Honestly, I put way too much effort on this shitpost lmaooo, but I just wanted to get my thoughts out in a more concise manner. If you want to add more stuff about these three that I didn't mention, feel free to do so. Anyways thanks for reading