#this bed looks so *crisp* there is no better way to describe it

[knoepfl]

The Captain’s Heart

Characters:

Captain Hook (Disney Version)

Female Pirate (Reader)

Smee (Mentioned)

Trigger Warnings:

Illness (fever, coughing, physical weakness)

Brief mentions of pain and discomfort

Masterlist

Words: 900

---

The crew of the Jolly Roger knew their captain as a man of grandeur and ruthless ambition. They feared him, respected him, but they never truly knew him. Not like she did.

She was the only female pirate on board, an anomaly in the world of seafaring men, and a mystery to all but one. Captain Hook, with his sweeping red coat, sharp hook, and dramatic flair, was every bit the fearsome leader they thought him to be. Yet, when night fell and the crew was asleep, he was hers—and hers alone.

Tonight, the ship was quieter than usual, save for the occasional snore from Smee and the others who shared the lower cabins. But up in Hook’s grand cabin, things were different. The Captain was ill, and no amount of his usual grand gestures could hide the fact that he was suffering.

Hook lay in bed, pale, his once-crisp red coat discarded, and his skin damp with sweat. His breathing was labored, each exhale rough and rattling. He wiped his brow with a trembling hand, then quickly stifled a cough that tore at his throat. He hated to admit weakness, but the fever had him firmly in its grasp.

The door creaked open, and his tired eyes, bloodshot and heavy-lidded, snapped to the entrance. He half-expected Smee to come bumbling in again, bringing more useless tonics that only made Hook feel worse. But instead, it was her—the one person who truly soothed his restless mind.

“Still playing the brave captain?” she whispered, her lips curving in a soft smile as she stepped inside, glancing over her shoulder to ensure the crew was none the wiser.

Hook attempted to sit up, but the motion sent a dizzying wave through him, making his vision blur. “Ah, my dear… I… I am perfectly—” A coughing fit cut him off mid-sentence, and he clutched his chest as the sharp pain wracked his body. His face flushed, embarrassed at his own weakness. “Blasted cough… Smee! That bumbling fool nearly drowned me in tea, yet the fever rages on!”

She crossed the room swiftly, her heart aching at the sight of him, usually so grand and composed, now reduced to a pale, sweaty mess. “You’re overworking yourself,” she chided gently, easing him back down onto the bed. “Let me help.”

Hook tried to muster a look of defiance, but he was too weak to protest. “I—cannot… allow you to see me like this,” he muttered between ragged breaths, his voice scratchy from coughing. “If the crew ever—ah!” His hand flew to his chest as another sharp pain struck, and he winced.

“Shh,” she whispered soothingly, grabbing a cloth from a basin of water she had brought with her. The cool cloth was pressed to his fevered forehead, and he groaned, his muscles finally relaxing. “You’re not as invincible as you like to think. Now, rest.”

His eyes fluttered closed for a moment, the cool cloth offering some relief, but the fever still burned hot beneath his skin. His face was flushed, and sweat dripped down his neck, dampening his hair. Every time he moved, a painful ache shot through his bones, and his head throbbed with a relentless headache. His voice, usually so commanding, had turned into a hoarse rasp.

“The blasted fever…” he muttered. “I feel as though I’m being boiled alive, yet I shiver as if the depths of winter have fallen upon me.”

She ran her fingers through his sweat-soaked hair, smiling softly at his dramatic way of describing the simplest symptoms. “You’ll feel better soon, once you rest.”

“I cannot rest with Smee fussing over me like a nanny!” Hook flung his hand out, a small, exaggerated gesture despite his fatigue. “He’s more of a hindrance than the fever itself!”

She chuckled softly, wiping his brow again, her touch gentle and calming. “Which is why I’m here,” she whispered, her voice soothing him more than the cloth could. “You’ll get no rest with Smee pestering you.”

Hook gave a deep, rattling sigh, his dramatic mask slipping away as his fever-worn body could no longer maintain the pretense of strength. His eyes softened as he gazed at her. “I must appear… pathetic,” he murmured, his breathing shallow. “But I feel—better…when you’re here.”

She smiled, leaning closer, her fingers tracing his jawline tenderly. “You don’t have to pretend with me. You know that.”

He shifted slightly, his movements slow and stiff as if every joint ached. “The crew… they cannot know. They mustn’t see… the great Captain Hook brought low by a mere cold…” He let out another weak cough, covering his mouth with his hand as his body shuddered with the effort.

“No one will know,” she whispered, climbing onto the bed beside him. Her arms wrapped around him, pulling him close. He melted into her embrace, his head resting against her chest, a sigh escaping his lips as he finally allowed himself to relax.

“You’re the only one I trust,” he mumbled, his voice barely above a whisper. “My strength… and my weakness…”

She pressed a kiss to his temple, feeling the heat radiating from his skin. “And I’ll always take care of you, Captain.”

Hook gave one last sigh, his feverish body finally succumbing to sleep, his breathing slowing as he settled into her arms. For now, Captain Hook, terror of the seas, was just a man who needed her.

---

Author’s Note: I wanted to bring out the softer side of Captain Hook that only his secret lover knows, while staying true to his dramatic, over-the-top personality from the Disney films. The fever gives him a rare vulnerability, but even in his weakest moments, he maintains that flair we know and love! Hope you enjoyed this, and feel free to share any thoughts or ideas for more!

[illmother]

ೀ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ⎯ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ 𝖕𝐚𝐫𝐚deisos 𝓼𝗰𝘂𝗺.

A/N: rewatched the rain burst event AGAIN and fell in love with rahu all over again, i now declare myself vice president of rahu nation. (if you will 🙏) i’ve been reading “On A leash” again and got inspired, so soldier x doctor it is

⏜ ₊ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ݁ Rahu x Paradeisos!Doctor!Reader

cw: a bit suggestive

Resilience, strength, obedience. Those words could very well describe Rahu as a whole, a headstrong, dependable soldier who wouldn’t hesitate to kill in order to pave the way to victory. Being part of the FAC elite division, she has faced many dangers alike, big and small. But regardless of this fact, it’s not uncommon for her to get injured despite also being a sinner with immense power, which brings Rahu to this predicament quite often.

The doors of the infirmary opens, and in walks the tall sinner. Immediately upon arrival, Rahu was hit with a nauseating scent, which in turn made her brows furrow. “That habit will kill you one day.” She sneered through her mask, walking up the source of that wretched smell that kept assaulting her senses, smoke and cheap cologne. Rahu’s expression remained stoic and stern, as she came up to the root of her irritation, and more notably—desires. Yet, only a small laugh could be heard, a sound so empty, so hallow, it made Rahu tense. Damn, that women, that damned doctor that claims she’s only here to treat patients, but rahu knew better than to trust paradeisos scum. Her eyes narrowed at the figure in front of her, draped in a white coat, head tilted away from her, she seemed to be paying to mind to the sinner.

“You say that yet, you come back to me all tattered up weekly.” You countered with a smile, leaning against the crisp, white wall of the infirmary, with a cigarette in hand. Finally, for the first time since Rahu’s arrival, you turned to face her, before your eyes trailed down to the state she was in. You noticed a rather large wound right on her abdomen—not deep, but enough for it to cause pain and discomfort, alongside other smaller injuries, and a visible frown formed on your delicate features. But for some strange reason, some stupid reason, seeing that change on your usually serious face was…weirdly intoxicating to Rahu. But just as fast as it came, it was gone, she was intrigued, she needed to see it again, see that look on your face, see what other expressions that stern face can morph into. “Really, who’s actually going to die first?” You asked with mild irritation and a hint of—concern? in your tone, snapping Rahu out of whatever trance she was in. You heaved a sigh of frustration before putting the cigarette out and throwing the bud in the ashtray.

“Come, let’s get you fixed up.” You gestured for her to come sit on a hospital bed with a nod of your head, and she complied, not that she had a choice if she wanted back on the frontlines as soon as humanly possible. You stared Rahu down, hands in your coat pockets, and she instinctively gripped the sheets, your stare was intense, and she needed stability. There was silence between the two of you, and you raised your eyebrow. “Undress.” You ordered sternly, to which her expression faltered, she let out a small sound of surprise. “What?” Rahu questioned, her hands gripping the sheets tighter, as her brows furrowed. You only looked at her with that same deadpan expression on your face, it only made her more irritated.

“Do you want to get treated, or no? your pick.” You gave her an ultimatum, either get treated or die in battle, her choice. Though, in all honesty, you were going to treat her either way, and you were well aware how suggestive you sounded when you told her to undress, but you couldn’t help but find every reaction of hers…quite endearing. A smug smirk was plastered on your face, as she begrudgingly started rid herself of her dark coat, leaving her in her white now blood soaked button down—if you were feeling optimistic, you’d think the blood wasn’t hers, but in this case you knew it was. Once again, there was silence, a deafening silence, one you would deem peaceful if it wasn’t for the sinner glaring holes through your skull. You sighed, before getting on your knees, kneeling down. Rahu watched your every move, from the way you gently lifted up her shirt to inspect her wounds, to the way you eyebrows furrowed when you were deep in thought. She seemed all too focused on your expression, your face, your lips—

Rahu instinctively shoved you away, when she felt you unbuttoning her shirt, her hand situated in your hair. You stare up at her, her face was covered by her oni mask, yet the tips of her ears were red, how…cute. Coming from someone like her. “What—what the hell are you doing?” Rahu stammered out, her grip firm on your hair, yet you didn’t move, didn’t even flinch. “How else am i going to treat you?” You countered, but still let go of her bloodied shirt, crossing your arms in mock irritation. “You should have just asked, i’ll do it myself.” She says simply with mild annoyance, before her large, calloused hands let go of your hair, and moved up to unbutton her shirt. “Rather skittish today, aren’t we?” You teased, before getting to work, cleaning and fixing her wounds up, before she inevitably gets injured again or exerts herself too much, so much so her wounds reopened. It happened more than once, more times than you can count, or even remember.

As you treated her wounds, occasionally hearing pained groans above you, it amused you to no end if you were, truly, being honest. Seeing her pale hands, covered in countless scars that had built up over the years grip the sheets until her knuckles turned white, it was beyond amusing to you, but even despite focusing on treating her, you could practically feel her eyes on you, and you’d be lying if you said it didn’t make you shiver.

“Alright, you’re all fixed up.” You stated calmly, before standing up and straightening yourself out. “As always, i insist you stay here and recover. Going back to the frontlines in this condition would—” You expected her to just fix her appearance up, and walk out without another word, but to your surprise she only responded “I’ll stay.” Rahu stated firmly, before crossing her arms, you almost let out an laugh at how unexpected this behavior was, especially coming from her. “Have you gotten yourself so beat up, you’re finally listening to me?” You teased, before eyeing the bloodied shirt she had on. “It’ll do me some good if you get rid of that, it’s gonna reek up my infirmary. I’m sure the FAC will provide you with another in due time.” You hummed, gesturing to her shirt, to which she reluctantly complied and took it off. What a strange change of pace, not that you were complaining, she was much more tolerable, but somewhere, deep down, you knew why she was so hostile towards you. You were from Paradeisos, it was natural for her to be on guard, you really couldn’t hold it against her.

“You’re making that expression again.” Rahu commented, which makes your gaze shift from her discarded shirt to her face, and your eyes shine with a hint of attraction at seeing her exposed, toned stomach, your eyes trailed higher until they settled on her chest, and collarbone—you quickly snapped out of the daze you were in, and stared her in the eyes. “Do you enjoy looking at my face that much, you even notice the smallest of changes?” You teased with a grin, to which you noticed her eyebrow twitched, just the tiniest bit.

“You’re free to stare as much as you want.”

[loveallthegays]

Karan Brar - How I Found Myself

For years, I had nailed the whole "compartmentalizing" thing and I figured I didn't need to stop then. There was public Karan and private Karan. Both were real, but trying to hold them in one body was proving to be too much. Still, I kept pushing myself until cracks started to form. It all came to a head while I was drunkenly hunched over a toilet bowl, watching my tacos from lunch and several White Claws come back out. I decided that was the best time to come out to Cameron and Sophie.

The moment the words left my mouth, I regretted it. I could barely see straight, but I ended up trying to do some damage control anyway. The best thing I could think of came stumbling out of my mouth:

“If you guys want me to move out I can. Just give me two weeks to figure it ou--”

They interrupted me by hugging me from behind. Again, I told them I should move out. They told me I was being stupid. I told them I’d cover for them if people asked why we didn’t live together anymore. They said to shut the fuck up. I told them that they probably hated me. They said my bisexuality changed nothing for them. Eventually, I lost enough steam to finally go to bed. I was too afraid to sleep on my own so Sophie grabbed a bowl, put it by my side of the bed, and made herself comfortable on the other side. They were both shocked when I came out, not because of my sexual identity, but because I genuinely thought they would want nothing to do with me after I told them. Today I can understand how absurd that was — Soph and Cam had been my best friends for years and loved me every step of the way. Why in the world would they stop then? I think I just convinced myself that this part of me would feel less like an invitation to know me better and more like a burden they had to endure.

The next morning, we reconvened in the living room and even in my sober state, I tried to give them one more opportunity to accept my offer to move out. Living together had been a childhood dream of ours, but a voice inside of me kept shouting that I had just ruined the beginning of a beautiful chapter. To no one's surprise, Cameron interrupted me once again, while Sophie tried to hide her frustrations because I refused to listen to what they had to say.

This was the first time in years that I wasn’t hiding anything from them; instead, they were seeing the most authentic version of me. I finally gave up and accepted that they loved me as I am, as I’ve been, and as I’m going to be. This was a crisp picture of what unconditional love looked like: my two best friends sitting across from me on a discount couch, waiting to hear me describe my type so they could take on their new roles as matchmakers. They weren’t going anywhere.

[struckd0wn]

I'll Make You Mine ── Hanzo Shimada

Hanzo Shimada × ftm!reader

CW: mentions of noncon (not w/ Hanzo), Hanzo leads Shimada Clan AU, sex slave, reader had top surgery, clit and cunt used as describing anatomy, he's gentle :3, mention of scars and bruising from previous experiences,

A/N: this lowkey drags on so mb, also dk if I hate it or like it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You were on your way to the Master's room, nervous and shaky as two women led you there. They had retrieved you at his request. First they took you to the bathhouse, pampering you with soft hands, making sure to not miss a single spot. The two scrubbed and washed your hair, almost relaxed if it weren't for your nerves. The bath was filled with cherry blossom soap, probably made with the trees just outside the Shimada castle. After, they dried you off promptly before adorning you in a plush robe that came down just below you knees.

You had been in the castle for a little over a month now, having been captured by the Shimada clansmen. You had gotten yourself stuck in business you had no need to be in and it led you here. You were supposed to be dead, and maybe you would have preferred to be. Instead they kept you in a room, by yourself, to be used by the men of the castle for their pleasure. They were rough, you deserved it according to them. They had spared you so you owed them, and you payed with you body, and although you were greatful at first you didn't care much for it now. The ladies of the clan would come by twice a day with food, which you would eat with bound hands and the door locked at all times. You weren't bathed, simply wiped down with a damp rag after every use.

Word about you had gotten around fast, in your first week you were visited more times than you could count, and now he wanted to see you. You never met Hanzo truly, only seeing him in passing or hearing about him from the clans members. But he had never stopped to see you, you wondered if he even knew about you, and here you were on your way to his private bedroom.

You'd better behave, one of the women would tell you. He's the Master, you cannot upset him. The more and more they warned you, the more and more tense you got. But you couldn't turn back now, standing right outside what you assumed was his bedroom door.

"Master Shimada, he is ready for you." The other woman chimed out, giving you a worried look before sliding the door open. You stood there, completely silent as you took in the scene in front of you.

His room was boring. A futon, low to the floor on a short wooden frame, pushed head side to the wall. Next to the bed was a nightstand, similar to the one in your room, that housed a small bonsai tree. He sat with his back turned to the three of you. The sliding doors in front of him opened to reveal a private garden, dark but lit with small lanterns, the curtains blowing gently in the crisp summer wind. Next to him on the floor was an incense stick, the smoke wafting through the room almost creating a fog. He wore his typical blue, only this time a yukata, one shoulder uncovered to reveal his tattoo, his hair down and draping over his shoulders.

The clans woman pushed you into the doorway, causing you to stumble slightly as the door shut behind you. You stood there awkwardly, fidgeting with your robe. "Sit." He speaks out, holding a hand out twords the futon. You flinch before rushing over to kneel on the bedding. You again wait, watching as he lifts the incense stick, blowing it out and tapping the ash into it's holder. The wind feels cold on you collar bone were the robe doesn't cover but you don't say anything. He turns slowly, looking at you for the first time. Your face feels warm and you try to prepare yourself for whatever might happen.

Hanzo stands up, walking twords you. You can't help but admit he is a very attractive man, much better than the clansman that would bed you every night. You avoid his eyes, gaze wandering to his tattoo that spans across his exposed chest and left arm. The Master sits in front of you, looking you in the eye. "I will stop... If you want me to." His voice is soft but raspy and you're surprised at the suggestion. No one had given you the option before. You nod your head a little at this and he continues.

The bigger man leans forward, gently pushing you at the chest to lay down. Your nerves are at their peak, staring up at the clans leader. He rest himself between your legs, pulling you so your legs rest on his thighs. The man in blue is silent the whole time and you almost wish he'd say something, or at least direct you so you do him no wrong. Hanzo's large hands find you thighs below the robe, pushing the fabric up to see.

You busy yourself with looking at the ceiling. His hands rub the fat of you thighs, one hand stops, and his thumb pushes down over one of the many bruises. You hiss out in pain and your hand flies down to grab at the Master's wrist before you can even think about. Panic. "Sir! I'm sorry, I didn't-" your words are cut off shorts as he flips his hand in yours, instead taking your wrist. But it's not angry, he holds it softly in his own. His eyes fall onto the ring of red on your wrist where your hands were bound together. Tutting his lips, Hanzo leans down to press a kiss to the bruise on your thigh, then to your injured wrist. You stare down at him in awe.

"If I was aware they were hurting you, I wouldn't have let this go on for so long," He admits to you. "You do as they ask and they are still greedy." Hanzo's voice is sad, disappointed in his followers for your poor treatment. Even if you had gotten into their business, you were serving your "duties" yet they still found time to disrespected you.

He drops your hand, continuing up to the bow that held you robe together. The man watches your reaction as you gulp heavily, but he persists, unraveling the tie and letting the robe fall off your front. He doesn't make efforts to take it off of you entirely, his hand moving up to hold you at your plush hips. He squeezes at you love handles with a small smile, taking you all in with one look. You refuse to meet his eye but Hanzo doesn't object, his right hand sliding down to your crotch and the other to you chest. One thumb strokes the scarred flesh of your pectorals and the other finds your clit, applying a pressure that makes you squirm.

Hanzo is completely enamored by you. Robe half off, skin glowing under the moonlight that shines in from the still open door to the garden. You hide your face from him but you can't hide the moans that escape you and the way your hips move to chase his touch. It's the first time someone had stopped to touch you how you wanted. He wasn't just taking, also giving as he rubs you to near explosion, just watching you wiggle below him, indulging in your sounds.

Life as a clans leader was lonely, the Master didn't have time for relationships outside of business so this within itself was a treat. He had heard about you, his clansman weren't discrete about you, not at all. But the thought weighed heavy in his mind about having you for a night, and he wasn't regretting it now that he had you.

You feel your peak nearing but the man doesn't allow it for a second, pulling his hands away. You let out a deprived whine but he's to busy now, moving his yukata out of the way to reveal his hard cock underneath. "Don't worry, you'll get your fill soon enough." Is his response to your whining. He stroked himself with a low rumble before running his tip through your folds. You take this time to finally look at him, as now he was to busy to notice.

His face was serious yet relaxed. Hanzo was a fit guy, you traced around his muscles with your eyes, watching as the tattoo formed around them perfectly. You wanted to see more, so feeling a little daring you reached out twords him. Your finger hooks under the fabric of his obi, the band of fabric that held the yukata together. Tugging very gently at it, this gets his attention. The Masters eyes find your finger, then your eyes. Hanzo smiles sweety down at you, using both of his own hands to remove the obi. After, he shrugs the yukata off his other shoulder, fully revealing himself to you.

Before you can look for another second. He pushes his tip into you, your head rolling back against the pillow. Hanzo moves slowly, pushing inward with his hips and it doesn't take long before the two of you are connected at the base. The man's large hands find your hips again and he uses them for leverage as he pulls out painfully slow. He watches every expression, listening to every noise you make.

He begins to move faster, thrusting into you with a pace that makes you head go foggy. The drag of his cock as he pulls out is almost teasing you before he slams back in. You can't help but get a bit louder now, but he can't either. Your moans are sweet and his are ragged, grunting over you eagerly. Hanzo leans over to kiss you, lips connecting to yours, moving slowly as he swallows each whine that comes from you. The feeling excites him, he grips tighter on your hips, fucking you deeper into the mattress below. His lips move down to kiss your jaw, then neck, his ear positioned near you mouth. You're loud, but he doesn't care. You smell like the trees that surround his home, his castle. You're soft and lovely to handle, not to mention how good you felt. By the minute Hanzo grew more and more obsessed with you, beyond the point of sex, he found himself wanting to know you.

"I am drunk on you," He admits out loud. You just barley process it, but you are truly flattered. By now he's entirely wrapped around you. His large arms wrap around your middle as he ruts into you endlessly. "My senses are full of you, I can't get enough of the way you feel, how you look, how you moan for me. I imagine you taste just as perfect, " Hanzo confesses. "I bet they say the same thing, but who wouldn't. You're beautiful." He continues on thrusting into you faster than before, the coil in your stomach on the verge of snapping. The thing is, they didn't say the same things. To the others you were just a good fuck for whenever they needed. You wondered how they could be so relentless and brutal but their leader is wrapped around you and desperately telling you how amazing you are.

Hanzo pulls the two of you upwards, now sitting on his thighs as he fucks upwards into you. Your arms wrap around his shoulders and your head leans down to rest on your bicep. He watches as you barley have the energy anymore, the two of you growing more tired, but your end is fastly approaching. "I won't let them treat you badly anymore. You're mine, I want to know you. I want to treat you nicely, but only if you allow me." Hanzo tells you, and if feels nice to have a choice, nice to feel wanted instead of being constantly degraded. You whine in response, and finally you feel yourself snap.

Your orgasms is strong and you tense in his arms before fully letting go. You moan his name as you wrap around him tighter. His breathing is harsh and he's still pushing into you eagerly, the feeling of you realising over his cock is to much as your walls flutter over him and soon enough he's finishing too. Hanzo groans loudly, hissing in pleasure as he cums inside of you, gently fucking into your sweet pussy. He pulls out slowly, your legs and his waist are covered in your combined slick. You relish in the feeling for as long as you can, having been the first orgasm to come purely from pleasure to happen for a while. The man leaves you, and you wondered if he'd just leave you there to be picked up, after everything he had said. He's back before you know it, back at your side with a glass of water and a rag.

After he cleans you he lays beside you, facing you. It's all a bit awkward now, but you're to tired to care. "I meant what I said..." His voice is quite, but you hear him. "I've seen you. I've overhead you and my maids talking and I grew interested in you. I thought maybe you wouldn't want to see the leader of the clan that is keeping you here." He tells you, his hands move to brush the hair out of your face. "I really didn't know they were hurting you and for that I am sorry. If you'd let me... I'd love to make it up to you." The wind picks up a bit outside, but the air is warm. The moon is shining in onto the two of you, it illuminates his face with it's serious expression.

"I'd like that..." You whisper back, closing your eyes to fall asleep.

[jawllines]

I have so many things I want to highlight so here’s a big ol list of em. But first I need you to know that I’m at the end of my period and I feel like all of my weepy emotions are the same as they are at the beginning of my period lol. And tbh I think that worked in your advantage!!! But without further ado, The List:

All of Harry’s texts to y/n:

I’m always thinking about you.

Miss you.

&

You never have to thank me for anything.

I'm just happy to be able to help you, you know?

And don't worry about that at all. Take your time, I understand.

I’ll always wait for you.

The way they get after each other for being out of bed/being out in the rain

“I don’t have someone to look over me. I only have myself.” 

Harry shook his head, “You always have me,” he set the thermometer down on the table, then grabbed for the medicine, “Even. . .even if you hate me, you always have me.” 

Literally every single time Harry told her he missed her.

Niall pouted when he saw him the other day, flicking his shoulder, inquiring where all his luster went.

"You know where it went," Harry whined quietly.

Harry’s thoughts (the entire section but I’ll just write the first part):I love you – he wants to say, I love you, I love you, I love you. I love you so much that it hurts me to be away from you…”

Harry thinking, “you’re my person – even if the stars don’t think so, I know it.” And then her thinking this after Harry tells her he loves her: “You’re my soulmate, even if it’s not written in the stars.” ***THIS RUINED ME WHEN I PUT IT TOGETHER***

Y/n deciding getting to be with him now was better than never being with him. How she would rather be vulnerable and get hurt so she could experience love. How she was ready to build herself into his life as a permanent fixture even if he found his soul mate.

When (I think) she got her mark:

“It feels like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders, or like her body had converted all the bitterness and sadness and general upset over her situation into something light and fluffy. Like the marshmallow you scoop out of a jar, or what clouds should feel like. It’s nice. She isn’t sure if it was making up with Harry that did it, or (THIS!!!) finally appreciating the outcome of her ability (CRIES) – touching and caressing the mark that will forever stay on his skin – but it felt. . .like something had clicked. Something made sense, that night, and it alleviated a pain that Y/N had been lugging around with her for so long” — when it clicked I think she got her mark!

Let’s be honest. The whole picnic scene. I can’t pick a part of it because the whole thing was perfectly and beautifully written and made my heart SO squidgy. But okay if I had to pick it’d be this line:

“Y/N thinks, that maybe the ‘something good’, is how wide his smile is after she says it.” — I’ve never been in love but it seems like it really is the little things 🥹

Harry pressing his hands on her bum when they go uphill on their hike

The entirety of Harry finding her mark. Being able to physically feel his emotions because of your writing. Being able to perfectly picture his face. How tender y/n is with him when she’s worried something wrong.

How nervous she was about finding out if it matched. I could feel the (crisp) trepidation. I felt like *I* didn’t know if it would match or not (even though you only write happy endings!!)

How perfectly you describe how she felt when she found out the matched. Pretty sure I actually let out a sigh of relief and my whole body unclenched. I could physically feel the peace she felt! How everything felt calm and clicked into place.

Them taking a picture of the mark!!! The second it was revealed it was on her neck I was like “TAKE A PICTURE TO SHOW US!!” Like I am in this with them.

How confident Harry was all along that she was his soulmate.

Everything about how sweet the sex is. I’m a sucker for sweet and gentle smut I can’t even lie. Makes me teary every time.

“We can stop here. I just wanted to make you feel good” “if you don’t get inside of me, I’ll scream” written like a true girl about to start her period

Of course him flipping her over. He’s so obsessed with her mark. He’s going to only ever want her to wear her hair up so he can touch it and kiss it and admire it.

How much ferret and Dolly love Harry and y/n more than the person that actually keeps them alive. The way they chirp when they see them. How they always have to go pick up the other cat because they can’t be left behind!! They truly became their own characters and added so much to the story.

This is so long but I could go on all day. Truly your best writing I think. These feel like the most believable characters. Everything about them was so well balanced. The way they felt and their emotions. How raw and vulnerable they were. How they both were messy but in the most normal human ways. Ugh how eager Harry was!!! I think he made me believe in true love lol. But he was just so sweet and gentle and eager and caring. And how there was always this almost lingering feeling protectiveness that y/n had over Harry?? How quickly it seemed like she’d fall apart if he was hurting or sad and when she was angry at him for not telling her the truth but she needed him to be looked after. UGH

Okay I have to be done because I’m about to cry again hahaha. So good. I’m obsessed and I wish I could read it all again for the first time. Thank you for sharing your gift with strangers on the internet 💛💛💛

(I never sign these things off but I’ll sign this one off lol 🐇🫀🫶🏼)

THIS LITERALLY MADE MY MOUTH DROP OPEN I COULD CRY???!! THANK YOU SO MUCH BUBBLES THIS IS SO NICE AND VERY THOUGHTFUL I LOVE YOU A LOT

IM REALLY HAPPY YOU LIKED IT :-) THERES LOTS OF LITTLE THINGS I DIDNT THINK ANYONE WOUKD CARE ABOUT OR NOTICE LIKE HOW MUCH THE KITTIES LOVE THE OTHER OWNER OR EVEN THEM MIRRORING THEIR THOUGHTS BUT YOU DID SO THAT MAKES ME HAPPY :D

[jerzwriter]

That's the tea, T.

Book: Open Heart (Late Book 2 Timeline)

Characters: Tobias Carrick x F!MC, Ethan Ramsey, Bryce Lahela

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Implied sensuality- nothing explicit

Words: 1,800

Summary: Tobias, Casey, Ethan, and Bryce take a walk to the new coffee place... and it turns out to be an educational experience for all as Tobias's tea order causes some commotion.

A/N: Hey all! This story takes place in the early days of Casey & Tobias's relationship, not long after he begins working at Edenbrook. This was inspired by @inlocusmads, who sent a "Is this your HC" ask that she believed Tobias had a coffee order that drove Ethan crazy. I loved it... but made it tea instead.

For most Bostonians, five AM represented an ungodly that should only be spent one of two ways: in bed or on an early flight out of Logan to the tropical destination of your dreams.  But that luxury wasn’t afforded to doctors. Duty called at all hours of the day, and while it wasn’t always easy, most adjusted… some better than others.

On this morning, Edenbrook’s Diagnostic Team’s office was in full swing at the ungodly hour. Ethan, who had dealt with this for years, sat at the head of the conference table wearing a crisp lab coat and a freshly pressed shirt. Chipper as he could be, for Ethan Ramsey, you wouldn’t have known that it wasn’t five in the evening by the looks of him. However, Casey offered a contrasting picture. Her hair was pulled into a messy ponytail, and her scrubs and lab coat could be best described as “slept in,” which was odd considering she hadn’t slept a wink. She’d never be a fan of mornings, but she was doing better. She only yawned every ten minutes now, a marked improvement from before.

As the two read over charts, a cheerful whistle began to permeate the air, to Ethan’s annoyance. While he may have been used to being up this early, perhaps he was even OK with it. However, this enthusiasm was overkill, and there was no doubt who the culprits would be. He smiled when they walked into the room as if on cue.

“Tobias… Bryce,” he groaned. “Why the hell are you two so happy?”

“Why not?” Bryce flashed his megawatt smile. “It’s a new day, and there is always a reason to smile!”

“Hey, go easy on him,” Tobias snickered. “After all, some of us have more reason to smile than others.”  

Casey giggled as Tobias winked flirtatiously in her direction, and suddenly Ethan was the most glum in the room.

“Tobias & I were going to run to the coffee shop. Would you guys like anything?”

“You mean the cafeteria?” Ethan groused.

“God, no!” Bryce replied. “The new coffee place on Cambridge opens at 5:00. It’s worth the walk.”

Ethan’s face changed at once, happy and duly impressed. “Really? You know what? I’ll join you!”

“Uh, it’s probably best if you just give us your order. We’ll have it back to you in no time.”

“That’s a lovely offer, Lahela, but I’d like to go along.”

“OK,” Bryce hummed. “I just hope you can… handle it.”

“Handle it?” Ethan asked with annoyance. “It’s a three-block walk. I run marathons. I can handle it.”

“Yeah,” Bryce chuckled. “That’s not what I meant.”

“Bryce,” Casey yawned. “Leave him be. If the man wants to live dangerously, so be it.”

Ethan looked between the two friends, thoroughly confused.

“Does that mean you’re joining us too, princess?” Tobias asked.

“Princess?” Ethan mocked. “You do remember that you’re at work, right?”

“I’m not officially on the clock until 6:00, so she’s princess to me for another hour.”  Tobias tapped Casey on the shoulder and grinned. “So, you ready… princess?”

“Can I just stay here and sleep?” she whined.

“What? And miss the social experiment about to take place?” her boyfriend laughed. “Come on, baby. If you’re too tired, I’ll carry you back.”

Ethan pinched the bridge of his nose. “Oh, for the love of Jesus.”

“You know what,” Casey laughed. “You convinced me. I need to witness this.”

The walk over was pleasant. The three men chatted amicably as Casey did her best to stay awake. But entering the coffee shop helped her immeasurably. The robust aromas, uplifting music, and happy chatter seemed to bring her back to life.

“This place is pretty nice,” Ethan observed. “How long has it been open?”

“Quite a while now,” Tobias responded. “I used to stop here on my way to Kenmore all the time.”

“Ah,” Ethan sighed. “The good ol’ days.”

“You know that seeing me daily has brought unbridled joy to your life, Ramsey! Stop pretending otherwise! But seriously, I’m shocked you didn’t know about it.”

“He’s just very loyal to Derry’s,” Casey injected. “But trust me, Ethan, this place is just as good.”

“Hmm. I’ll be the judge of that.”

Casey was the first to order.

“Good morning, ma’am,” the pretty young barista grinned. “What can I get for you?”

“I’ll have a medium spice chai tea with just a splash of milk.”

“Very well, and you, sir?” She nodded at Ethan.

“Double espresso, black. No sugar.”

The barista grinned wickedly when she saw Tobias, but underneath was a look of dread.

“Hello, sir,” she beamed. “The usual?”

Bryce looked at Ethan, then turned to Casey with a shit-eating grin. “It’s showtime.”

“You didn’t get ‘the usual’ right last time, did you,” Tobias looked at the barista’s nametag, “Courtney?”

“I’m sorry about that. It was just….”

“Hey, no worries,” Tobias said with a beguiling smile. “You’re new, and I’m sure you’ll have it down pat as well as Alexa over there in no time at all.”

“For Christ’s sake,” Ethan muttered. “How complicated can your order be?”

“Complicated,” Bryce, Casey & the new barista said in unison as Tobias sighed.

“OK, a grande green tea latte,” he started.

“That’s not so bad….” Ethan interrupted.

But one look from Tobias stopped him in his tracks. “I wasn’t finished.”  He turned back to Courtney with his ever-enchanting grin. “Let’s start back at the top. A grande green latte with one pump of unsweetened soy milk, six level scoops of matcha, and serve it at 195 degrees.”

Ethan turned to Tobias with a raised brow. “Are you serious?”

Casey tugged on Tobias’s sleeve. “You forgot no foam, babe,” she yawned.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” he said with a kiss to the top of her head.

“OK,” Courtney started, “So, grande green tea latte, flat, with soy milk….”

“UNSWEETENED soy milk,” Tobias jumped in.

“And one pump!” Bryce added. “Please, do not make the dreaded two-pump error.”

“The two-pump error,” Casey giggled. “That reminds me of when….”

“ENOUGH!” Ethan yelled, only making Tobias hold Casey tighter.

“Uh, OK… grande green tea latte, flat, one pump of UNSWEETENED soy milk with matcha… uh, how many scoops again?” She asked nervously.

“You know what,” Tobias said. “Why don’t you give me the cup? I’ll write it out – and it will be a good reference for you in the future.”

Ethan shook his head. “And I thought I was a pain in the ass.”

“You are,” Tobias, Casey, and Bryce said in unison. 

“But in this scenario,” Bryce continued. “Tobias is the diva.”

“I am not a diva!” Tobias insisted. “It’s not that complicated!”

Casey rolled her eyes from under his arm, eliciting laughter from Ethan and Bryce.

“You’re not going to back me up?” Tobias asked.

“It’s not too complex,” she winked.

“Ugh,” Bryce moaned, “You’ve been such a kiss ass ever since the two of you started sleeping together.”

“Hey,” Tobias playfully smacked Bryce’s shoulder. “She’s my girlfriend… we’re not just sleeping together.”

“He finds the incessant need to say girlfriend repeatedly since he never had the emotional maturity to have one throughout his entire adult life,” Ethan moaned.

“Guys,” Casey interrupted. “I think you’re making this more difficult on the barista.”

Tobias finished writing his order on the cup and returned it to Courtney with a smile. “So, do you think you’ve got this?”

“I… I do,” she sputtered. 

Tobias hovered over the counter, watching as his beverage was being made. Casey was sure she saw beads of sweat forming on poor Courtney’s brow.

“I’m really sorry,” Casey apologized. “He’s usually not like this. He’s a really laid-back guy… but something about the green tea and matcha here, and the man loses his mind.”

“And don’t forget no foam,” Bryce chuckled. “I don’t know why, but the foam offends him.”

“You’d think he was freaking Gen Z,” Ethan muttered.

Tobias was so busy instructing the barista that he heard none of his companion's chatter.

“No!” he said. “No…no… you have to put the matcha in after the soymilk….”

Alexa, another barista, approached Courtney. “Here,” she smiled. “Let me walk you through it.” 

Alexa proceeded to make a perfect cup and handed it to a beaming Tobias. He took a sip and replied with a satisfied smack of his lips.

“See! That’s perfect. That’s how it’s done.”

Alexa put her arm around the new employee. “Don’t worry. You’ll get it soon enough. Usually, by the fourth time, you’re golden!”

“That’s if you’re allowed to make it at all,” a young man behind the counter complained.

Casey scrunched her nose. “Wait… why wouldn’t you be allowed to make it?”

Alexa looked at Casey, then at Tobias, and sighed. “Prior to dating you… he only let women baristas make his tea. He said the nuances were too complicated for men to get right.”

“What?” Courtney was astounded. “That’s reverse sexism!”

“There is no such thing as reverse sexism,” Casey informed. “Sexism is like racism. It’s a systemic bias based on social inequity; therefore, there is no ‘reverse.’”

“Thank you, baby,” Tobias jumped in.

“I wasn’t finished,” Casey glared. “Because what you did was still absolutely idiotic! Did you really think that?”  

“No, it’s just… look, the women got it right, and the guys… they struggled, so….”

Bryce lost his struggle to keep a straight face. “Right,” he laughed. “That was your reason, T!”

Ethan rubbed his furrowed brow. “You know, Casey… as much as I pity you, thank God you are dating this Neanderthal. Clearly, he needs rescuing.”

Alexa bit back a laugh. “And the city of Boston is forever in your debt.”

“Alexa,” Tobias said, grasping his chest. “I’m hurt!”

Realizing Bryce was empty-handed, Ethan asked if he had put in his order.

“Me? Nah. I’m just here for the entertainment.”

Casey looped her arm in Tobias’s. “So, is your tea, right… T?”

“It’s perfect!” He winked. “After all, it had a woman’s touch.”

“I’d really like to smack you right now,” she replied as they exited the door.

“Baby, stop! I told you, save that kinky talk for when we’re alone. But, if you insist, I can see if I find a quiet corner someplace….”

“I need to get the hell out of here,” Ethan moaned. 

“I tried to spare you,” Bryce smiled. “Race you back to Edenbrook?”

“You know what,” Ethan nodded. “You’re on!”

Tobias watched as the two men took off on foot, then he turned to Casey with a smile.

“Alone at last, princess.”

“You know, I love you,” she laughed. “But right about now, I want to bop you. Ethan’s right; you need reforming!”

“Hey, look! I am not and was never being discriminatory. I was just an insatiable flirt.”

“Oh, and now that I’m your girlfriend, that makes me feel so much better!”

“All right,” Tobias smiled. “You know I’m crazy about you. Do you really think you have anything to worry about?

“No,” Casey surrendered with a smile. “Not unless I have to make your stupid tea!”

“You know what,” he chuckled. “I want our relationship to work… just leave the tea-making to me.”

“Hey, no complaints from me.”

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics @choicesjunechallenge Long Nights/Long Days

[writer80000]

Split Tongue Cowboy

----

sfw original lesbian romance

5.4k words so far

warnings: gun violence, character death, & cults

----

featuring a blind scam artist fortune teller has been selling 'swaps', claiming that they can swap places with dead relatives in Hell. This blind fortune teller has humble dreams of starting a cult, sadly a detective does not want this to happen.

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Ginger ‘tsked’. Familiar faces across the street had a tinge of frosted pink. Only a couple people walked outside on the muddied dirt road. The saloon ladies’ kid was out there, carrying a stack of wood. Short dark messy hair with chubby cheeks betraying his hardened criminal scowl. One of his cheeks was noticeably a bit pruned and swollen. Ginger got up from her seat near the shop window and put on a fluffy little-too-big petticoat before deciding to brave the cold. She hugged herself, freezing. Opening the door rang the shop’s bell; The wind whipped at Ginger’s face, slowly blending into the crowd as her face got more pink. Ginger went up to the kid as he walked past the shop. Turning to him, and using mittens to pinch around his pruned cheek.

The kid stopped to look up at her, “What.”

She wanted to tease him. “Did you fight someone?”

“Yeah…” He sunk into his scarf.

“Really?” She paused, “Who?”

He wriggled free from Ginger’s cheek pinch and blew away a snowflake while palming his cheek with his free hand. “Leave me alone, hag.”

Ginger deeply gasped. She quickly drew her hand in front of her mouth for dramatic effect, “Who raised you to say such things…” “You’re scamming my mom!”

“Scamming?” Ginger gasped. “Scamming?!” flicked his forehead.

“Ow–All this fortune telling crap!”

Ginger took a second to look at him before grabbing him by the ear and pulling him towards her shop, causing him to drop a stack of wood. “Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow–”

The bell’s ding rang as they entered the shop. Ginger felt bad for the boy. His mom had a hard time getting out of bed while dealing with postpartum depression. He spent most of his time doing odd jobs for cash. Once they were in the shop, Ginger let him go. Lilac curtains pooled near the spruce hardwood floors. Tapestry and talismans hung off the ceiling. A loveseat in the shop window was littered with fresh ink bottles and paper talismans. There were little black specks of ink all over the poor floors. Ginger took a fuzzy coat off of a rack and threw it on the kid, it draping over his face.

The kid looked at the coat, deadpanning, “It’s pink.”

Ginger pointed to her eyes, “I wouldn’t know.”

“Right sorry…”

Ginger spoke again, “Who’s making you do work in this weather?”

“Mayor Geofrey, t-there's a new sheriff in town.” He chattered a bit, cold. He draped the coat over his shoulder.

A new officer wasn’t big news here. Mayor Geofrey had a habit of plucking new recruits, forcing them to work for a while, and then firing them abruptly. “What’s he look like?”

“She,” The boy corrected, “She’s em…” He paused, seemingly deliberating on something.

Ginger deadpanned. “She’s ugly.”

“No! Not at all, she has blonde hair, blue eyes, warm dark skin.”

This wasn’t enough for Ginger. “More.”

“Lemme think. She has… high cheekbones… and…” He paused in thought, “Her eyes are piercing, like really bold. I think her eyes are the first thing I noticed.”

The boy had gotten better at describing things for Ginger. Ginger sat with this, imagining the sheriff. = The boy sounded deflated, “I think the mayor picked her just to fire her.”

The shop bell rang. The crisp sound of leather shoes hit the air. “Miss Lee!” The boy’s voice sounded shrill.

Ginger could hear his footsteps as he ran out of the shop, hitting the door on his way out.

Ginger put on what she assumed was a polite smile, “Ah! Uh hello Ma’am.”

“I’ve heard a lot about this place…” The sheriff paused, “I’m miss Lee; you are?”

“Ah, Ginger!” Ginger declared.

“Oh. Could you read my fortune?”

“Oh of course, right over here.” Ginger led Lee to her crystal ball. Lee rubbed her hands together trying to warm up and sat on a cushion perpendicular across the crystal ball from Ginger, criss crossed legs.

“Mmm, no that won’t work.” Ginger scooted her floor cushion next to Lee’s, “Sorry. Just hand me your hand. Need to be close for this.” Lee placed her hand in Ginger’s. Normally this did nothing. Ginger would ask a couple questions and give some life advice. This time, Ginger felt something. It was as if small raindrops pattered on her chest around her heart. Her eyebrows raised.

“You…” Ginger jabbed her finger in Lee’s face.

Ginger’s head tipped back before her whole body slammed on the floor. She lost consciousness.

Read more vv

[flamingwordsinthesky]

Nightmares to Run From

SpideyTorch fic (WIP)

Johnny crawled into bed, not tired but unwilling to stay awake. He surrounded himself in the blanket as if the room was freezing, despite that having not been an issue for him since the cosmic radiation. He laid there for what felt like hours before Johnny’s eyes grew heavy and he closed them.

Wishing for a dreamless nap.

In the arena the screaming crowds chant and cheer as Johnny watches another fighter fall to the ground. Burned to a crisp. Johnny remembers the smell of burning flesh and it makes him want to hurl. But he held it in. He’s a champion, he needs to show it. No fear. No mercy. Even if he can never unsee the piles of bodies at his feet.

He looks up to see the bug tyrant himself, Annihilus, staring down at him, unamused. Johnny flipped him off, a gesture Annihilus learned was rude and snapped his fingers. There was a clanking of chains and rumble steel against steel. Johnny looked behind him as the large metal door slid up to reveal the darkness. Darkness he knew contained Annihilus’ abomination. A creature of arms, legs, stitched together and lumbering. Its shape large and imposing, it was almost like a dragon as its multiple yellow eyes set their sights on Johnny. It’s multiple hands opening like a flower to reveal the skull of a once living lizard like creature that still opened it’s only mouth to growl at Johnny

Johnny backed away as the creature dragged itself out with large claws of alien creatures he couldn’t even begin to explain. Reed always had a better way to describe things than Johnny. He missed Reed so much and his ready explanations for everything. Not this creature that Johnny could barely comprehend just by looking at it.

It had no mouth yet it could still speak.

Johnny hated when it spoke.

Because it had no voice of its own. The voices that came out of the creature were various harsh imitations of his friends, family, and past lovers. Johnny could barely think of shooting his fire at it. A large claw slammed close to him and he shouted “FLAME ON!”

He fought the creature, even as it spoke insults with its stolen voices.

“Worthless brat” Ben’s voice growled out of it. Johnny aimed for one of the creature's eyes.

“Ungrateful!” Sue’s voice screamed as the creature backed away after having some of their eyes burned out.

“Useless” Reed’s voice came out like he was so disappointed. That made Johnny falter for a moment before he remember what it was doing.

More insults emanate from the creature, every person Johnny had ever loved called him worse and worse things before finally his flame flickered out. The creature took its large claws to capture Johnny and bring it to his face.

The final voice that emanated made Johnny shake, his eyes wide and he wished that the creature would just eat him already.

“You were never worthy of love” Peter’s voice was cold. Johnny knew it was true, but he screamed anyway as the creature tore him apart.

[moremysteriesthantragedies]

Hello, Max

Previous (A-side) | Masterlist | Next

Trigger Warnings for unreality/dream logic, feelings of being trapped, symbolism connected to internalized homophobia, "statue" horror, body morphing, and religious (Catholic) elements.

Max squinted as his eyes opened to meet a bright, crimson light, causing him to stumble back. He gritted his teeth, straining against it and the many images that flashed through his head with the greens, yellows, and blues until his eyes could finally open once more. Yet, his vision was far from being what he would describe as clear. 

Feeling along his face, his glasses were absent from the bridge of his nose. As was his bedside table to his right, as was the bed beneath him. Inevitably, the person that had once slept beside him, angelic eyes fluttering closed and chest heaving up and down with a peaceful rhythm, was also nowhere to be found. And that fact would not change, no matter how hard he stared at the nondescript space beside him. 

Florence… 

Max stood straight up and came to a dramatic halt. He scanned his unfamiliar surroundings with a spike of urgency. 

All around Max there was a field of white. Though it wasn't a wheat field, nor did the luminescent spread resemble grass, even if parts of it were verdant. A better description, based on its shine and the true color still peeking through , would be snow. Yet, upon close inspection, the indents within its surface and around his feet indicated something much stiffer. 

Looking along, a metal object was sticking out of the carved pathway, glinting in the now dimmed lights. They must have fallen in his alarm, Max surmised, shifting through the mucky substance to make his way over. Max picked up his glasses from the ground, pushing the rounded spectacles on to finally illuminate the situation. 

Not only did his vision clear the moment he slipped them on, but it appeared his hearing had as well. He felt a popping sensation before the muffled sounds around him became as crisp as the air in Autumn. 

In the newly visible distance, dollops and cherries came into view, confirming Max’s suspicions. The substance was frosting, and what Max was standing on now was a cake. Not just any cake, a three layered wedding cake, if memory serves him correct, and, judging by the size, Max was on the very top of it. Hues of several colors shone on its surface in uneven triangles, though the backdrop was merely a layered brown. 

There was an unintelligible droning in the background that Max could not make out for the life of him, regardless of how close or far he seemed to come to it. It was accompanied by the somber notes of a piano, or, Max lifted a brow as he considered, an organ perhaps? Either way, the melody made his heart soar, so vividly able to see his lover pressing down on the keys. 

So, it’s just a dream. Max mentally sighed, putting a hand on his heart to steady himself. He hadn’t discounted the idea that he had started sleep baking in the middle of the night, smearing icing all over the kitchen floor and surfaces. With a soft chuckle, he decided this was a much better alternative.

A smile graced Max’s lips, the muscles in his back and shoulders slowly disengaging themselves. He had a trick for this. All he needed to do was blink twice and he’d be back in the waking world in an instant. He took a deep breath, counting with his fingers, one on each hand. 

One. His eyelashes collided before pulling apart again, the small hairs shining in the golden delicious light. A finger was drawn out to his right. The music in the background was beginning to reach its conclusion as he began the short count. Two. And the other was drawn out to his left.

There was darkness, and yet, consciousness did not follow. The black had simply lingered. Max’s lips and nose skewered as he opened his eyes again, only to be greeted by that same, frosty surroundings. He took a tentative step back, breath hitching in the sudden silence that had overtaken the scene. 

“It’s only a cake, Max. There’s no harm in looking around for a little bit longer,” he murmured to himself. 

As far as he knew, his next great design idea was hidden beneath that tampered surface, and he’d be amiss if he didn’t at least give it the full walk around. So, with the hunching of his back, he searched for his next point of interest. His eyes scanned around until he came face to face with…another face. 

The groom’s topper was present within the middle of the cake, though Max could not find the other anywhere. Using the indents made by both himself and an unseen second party, Max stepped towards it. The groom stood tall with a crumbling cavern just to his side, a part of the cake seeming to have melted in on itself. Max assumed that explained the missing second party, being careful not to come too close to the weak surface as he stepped in front of the lone figure. 

It was a well groomed gentleman, with an appearance so discolored even the vibrant lighting couldn’t put a dent in his overly gray tones. His dark hair was brushed back, mouth pulled into a wide smile to show off his perfectly white teeth. Something about his features and proportions felt intensely familiar, sporting slender cheeks with a sharp chin. Though any time Max tried to focus on the statue’s face, his vision began to act up again. He soon looked elsewhere, fully examining the stock still figure. 

The groom was much better dressed than Max was, the latter simply wearing a long, knitted cardigan with a plain white t-shirt, jeans, and a pair of sneakers. Max had managed to keep the sneakers relatively clean, if one ignored their bottoms, by retracing the previous steps, though it seemed the man in front of him had not experienced the same luck.

His tux had chocolate stains all over it, and Max was so focused on inspecting them, attempting to scrape the dried bits off, that he did not register that motion blur within the corner of his eyes was the moving of lips.

"Hello, Max."

Suddenly, the groom’s head turned, and Max threw himself back into the frosting with saucer wide eyes. There was no mistaking it. Even through the record static of the voice, Max had heard it too many times to play dumb. The man leaned down, giving a better view of his face, but never his eyes. 

"Why, when you see your own face do you assume harm," the man asked and Max glared at him from his crumpled spot.

Max had fallen on his side, having attempted to take a step back when he fell. His legs rested against each other, feet curling in to reach his bottom. 

“Perhaps, I should take on a more comforting form for you as well.”

Max’s mouth opened with a question, though his lips sealed shut when the groom’s features began to change. The man’s cheeks turned into a rosy red, his lips, which were pulled at their edges to become more plump, had become much the same. The color spread to the rest of his face, including his button nose, and seeped down his neck to cover his entire body. His hair, though straight, had found a few curls here and there, color breaking through the deep hue until it was a strawberry blonde. All in all his appearance had become much softer, more rounded, so to speak. When all the changes had set in, he offered Max a tender smile. 

“So, what do you think?” 

Piercing eyes shone out through the darkness, though only for a moment. A beautiful, sea emerald. Max's blood ran cold as the memories awoke, shaking off their musty cobwebs. 

Though the groom had settled on an older version, it didn’t take long for Max to recall the boy he had crafted it from. Max could feel his cheeks begin to flush.

Max’s hand jutted up at the sensation, feeling the warmth there, before he forced himself to move. He hopped up, going over to one of the candles near the middle of the cake. He yanked it out with some effort, gripping it tight within his hands before pointing it toward Sam…whoever he was. Though the end wasn’t even lit, so Max didn’t understand the point of it. 

"I apologize for being so bold. Can you forgive me, Jude?" The man asked in a voice that rang like wind chimes. 

It echoed in Max’s ears, his eyes stuck jumping between those features before he shook his head. 

"Listen. I don't know who or what you are or what you think you are. But, if you hurt Florence, a candle through the head is the least of your worries."

The man laughed, clapping at that, the sound sharp compared to the silence. His face changed back, as if the mere act had commanded it to. The rest of the groom’s appearance followed suit. 

“I’m you, of course. Isn’t that obvious?” the man said in a loud whisper, stepping forward with his head held high, “Relax, I only wish to speak with you.”

Max could feel his arms gradually fall to his sides, flinching as the candle fell from his hands, which had become just as limp. The man came closer and closer, Max backing away. He was thankful his legs remained functional, kicking up the cake’s fragile batter until…

…Max let out a harsh yelp, stumbling back and grasping for one of the cherry stems in desperation. However, his fingertips narrowly missed it and, when he did manage to grasp one, it merely broke beneath his touch. Now, not only was the side of his cardigan covered in frosting, but his fingers had collected several bits of cream in the struggle. 

He was only saved from his ceramic doom by the man walking over. He did so leisurely, motioning towards himself with his fingers before Max completely fell back. Max found himself pushed several feet forward, managing to remain on shaking knees despite the dragging of his feet. With Max in front of him, the man grabbed Max’s hand and pulled him even closer. Max soon landed straight into the man’s chest, head shifted to his right to avoid eye contact. 

“I promise to keep things short,” the man said, wrists lifting in a sign of mock innocence. 

The man’s smile widened as Max’s body went still within his touch, the man’s hand coming up to stroke through Max’s hair. Though Max’s brain surged with warnings, the fingers lightly scratching his scalp were distinctly his own. It felt the same as using his own hand to comb through his own hair. Which was to say it was known, and passive. 

“Does that sound fair?”

Max looked up, inspecting his own, distorted face before giving a faint nod of his agreement. The man grinned, showing off his teeth before, with two accidental blinks, Max’s eyes snapped open.

[pbandjesse]

Today was a really relaxing day. I am sad it's over. It was nice feeling relaxed and not feeling guilty about it.

I also got a lot of knitting done. I'm not all the way caught up but I'm not as seriously behind anymore and that feels good.

I didn't sleep that great last night. I was super hot and had a lot of trouble getting comfortable because of it. I woke up a lot and was just not settled. And then when James woke me up for real I was very crabby because I was so tired but also because my chest felt so tight. I think that's the best way to describe how I'm feeling right now. Like there's a rock on my chest. With just a little nausea. And sinus pressure. It's exhausting and it really has me upset. It's been a week. I shouldn't still feel like this. At least being on vacation is nice. No one expects anything from me.

That's the best thing about trips with James. We both can just be comfortably quiet for excessive amounts of time. But also check in with the other that we are having a good time. It's healthy and nice.

I would get up and get dressed. I wore my new birthday dress and I love it so much. I was very comfy. James made me toast and I got in the nice comfy chair and got into my knitting. And that's what I did for about two hours. Just knitting away. We listened to a podcast. James read the New Yorker. It was windy out and I liked looking out the window.

Eventually James said we should go out in nature. So we went and got the bikes. I forgot gloves so I put a long sleeve shirt on so I could cover my hands. And we biked around the park. There was a nice little paved trail. I liked that best of all. We also saw historical remains of a boat and where the amphitheater is which is built out into the water. It was lovely. We just talked and biked and enjoyed the crisp air. I felt really happy.

We also checked out the other camp sites. We found where the other, more traditional, cabins where. I tried to look inside but they were locked. They were very cute though and while I'm enjoying being spoiled I hope we can do more cabins in the future.

After going through the whole trail we went back to the cabin. It was almost 1 and it had been a nice day so far. We got in the hammock and laid together for a long time. But eventually we were hungry and cold so inside for hotdogs and stove top s'mores.

I chilled on the couch. Eventually doing some embroidery. And then after a while I was like. I want to sleep. So I curled up with James and took a long nap.

When I woke up we got in the car and went to get a pizza. Which wasnt the best pizza but it was still nice. We brought it back here and watched videos and enjoyed pizza. I kept working on embroidery stuff. And eventually we played a card game.

We had lots of laughs. But I was also suffering because my body is so tired. It's hard to engage for that long. But I had fun playing and I won in the end so you know I loved that.

I wish we got me a juice or something today. I feel dehydrated but water inst doing enough. We will find me something tomorrow. But for now I will be okay.

I just got out of the shower. And I am cozy in bed again. It's not as warm in here tonight so I hope to sleep better. Me and James brought in the hammock because it is supposed to rain in the morning. And becsuse of the rain we are planning on going to an antique mall tomorrow. I hope that works out because I would really enjoy that.

I hope you are all having fun today. I hope you are feeling good and washing your hands. Sleep well everyone. Take care of yourself.

[brainarchives]

p2

- the sound of birds - birds in general, especially small birds. watching them in the trees outside (e.g in the garden at home, looking outside the window of the living room of nantes close, looking down in the trees from james’ living room window - the way mum talks to neo - little birds - noticing little birds in trees - little birdsongs - finding a new colour that i really like - pasta, italian food, my mums bolognese - fruit - taste, smells, looks - so pretty and cute - spending time with myself - noticing improvements and feeling positive change, even if for just one moment where i recognise it while in the middle of a depressive episode - eating pasta, or any comforting food, in my underwear on my bed watching a film with myself - finding a song that resonates with me at a certain time in my life for some reason and exhausting that song so much because i love it, then moving on - listening to vampire weekend walking around victoria park and the sky is blue and i can really breathe - feeling the sunlight on my face - blue sky w cold weather - soft, shy, quiet, kind people - putting socks on after a shower - the scene in amélie where she helps the blind guy cross a road and describes what’s going on around them - self-care after a shower - my evening routine and the way that always helps and makes me feel more like a human, even if just a bit - when i can feel myself getting through the worst days. when my appetite comes back - hearing neo drinking water from his bowl - rain - rain in the countryside - rain anywhere - snow days with my best friends - big slices of pizza - sitting on a step outside in cornwall at night, the smell of the sea air, the sound of the sea - seaside towns - narrow roads, cobble stones - jack making me laugh so much - caleb caleb caleb - stale wotsits - my sister opening up to me, building a relationship with her - summer evenings outside, hearing cutlery clang from neighbours bc ppl are eating and spending time outside - realisations that i can feel in my gut; progress - laughing with penny in the car - singing to madonna with penny in the car - penny. being here. having another home. family. - the room i have here. the cosy bed. the privacy. time with myself. my own bathroom. - the smell of the air at night - stillness of the air at night. how quiet it is in the countryside - sunsets bright and colourful ones when it’s kinda muggy outside but makes a beautiful colour - watching the rabbits in the garden - getting to know penny - candles and incense - when i notice how much nicer i am to myself these days - gradually opening up - toby and henry playing videogames with caleb - jacks random affectionate texts - jacks random hilarious texts and voice notes - video calling with jack and wanting to cuddle with someone probably more that i’ve ever wanted to cuddle with anyone ever - stroking alfie’s soft fur and giving him kisses while he’s barely awake, before my last cigarette of the night - looking up at the stars at night - sitting outside on warm, still nights - sitting outside of crisp, still nights - on a run, looking around smiling so hard - time with toby and henry... being sat with them while they tell me details about all of their cuddly toys - toby’s little laugh when he’s engaged and connecting and having fun - henry’s cuteness and just how pure he is - growing in my relationship with jack, growing with him... communicating with him and then just feeling so much better... he seems to grow with me

[rinwellisathing]

Kroger surprisingly likes to be on top and mainly in control, but he is always open to what his partner would like. Still, with his extensive knowledge of the body, not just Githyanki but many races of Istik as well, he is far more confident in bed than one would expect and much like when practicing medicine, he knows what he is doing. 2. Things being unclean. He is not squeamish enough that he needs to have sex in an entirely sterile place after having just bathed, but too much risk of infection is distracting to him and will kill his mood. As far as turn ons, he loves to feel and see the movement of muscle and the gleam of sweat on skin. 3. Kroger can hold himself back for as long as his partner needs him to, he knows many tricks to temper his pleasure for a longer lasting tryst. 4. His ears and spine are very sensitive. 5. The easiest way to seduce Kroger is graceful movement as well as grand romantic gestures, gestures like that are unusual and exciting to him. 6. Kroger doesn't masturbate often, he finds he rarely has time for such a distraction. 7. Kroger likes to fuck doggy style but won't say no to missionary either, any position where he can easily watch the movements of his partner's body. 8. TW: CSA! While training as a Ghustil, Kroger's instructor developed an uncomfortable obsession with him and insisted that intimacy was important to his education. Being well behaved and a very private person, Kroger kept it to himself for quite a long time. 9. Kroger's favorite place to have sex would probably be a comfortable, freshly made bed in a modest inn room. A soft bed is incredibly luxurious to him and enhances the pleasure, as do crisp, clean sheets and pillows. 10. Because he is attracted to both Wyll and Jaina, he (shamefully by his own admission) masturbated to the idea of them together when they started their relationship. Neither of them was particularly offended, thankfully. 11. Kroger is very quiet, as part of his reserved nature. 12. Kroger isn't fond of sex toys because they often remind him of medical equipment, it just feels a bit unprofessional to him. 13. Kroger prefers giving, after all, what is sex if not a form of making someone feel better? 14. Not particularly often, he tries not to be distracted from his duties. 15. His biggest sexual desire would be to join Wyll and Jaina when they're together and to be able to please both of them. 16. Clinical and precise, but surprisingly loving. 17. Kroger's cock is about 5 inches, fairly average for his people. He certainly knows how to use it well. 18. He is usually thinking about Wyll and Jaina, sometimes Shadowheart (though that's a little more difficult as he's sure Lae'zel is interested in her and that makes it strange because he considers Lae'zel a sister and can't envision her like that.) 19. Kroger is pansexual. 20. Kroger enjoys dirty talk, particularly describing exactly what he will do to his partner and watching the look of excitement and anticipation in their eyes. 21. In Kroger's opinion, out in the woods the time he DID get to join Jaina and Wyll. It was a lot to handle being in the grass and dirt with them, but he still considers it worth it. 22. Kroger likes to be kissed on and around his ears due to their sensitivity. 23. His worst sex experience was the abuse he went through when he was in training. 24. When he finally got his wish to be with Jaina and Wyll, he was able to have multiple orgasms. 25. A bit of a loaded question as sometimes he isn't thinking of it in an erotic way. As a healer (specifically a Ghustil, so a doctor more even than a cleric), he needs to think of how his camp mates having sex will effect treatments. If someone gets pregnant and wants to keep it, what herbs can't he use? What if someone has an infection or social illness?

26. Kroger is not self conscious about his body. One benefit of being a medic is he understands everything about his body is natural and should not be a source of shame. 27. How long sex lasts with him really depends on how long his partner would like it to. 28. Kroger's focus makes it difficult to laugh during sex, but he wouldn't be ashamed to if it happened. 29. Kroger is extremely judgmental of people who won't eat pussy or suck cock. He considers an unwillingness to do these things very selfish.

[ducknotinarow]

[2012 Vap!Raph FTM Casey]

"Look, relax, I can explain!"

His dumbass really did not expect his VAMPIRE boyfriend to smell the blood currently leaking from between his thighs, but, maybe Casey should start using the thing he called a brain. Of course they would smell it! And sure, Raph didn't seem to question it much, for the first couple of days at least. But now that the blood smell was still strong and fresh on day three? Yeah, questions were being asked, and Casey was scrambling to think of the best way to describe it.

"Jus' chill okay, gimme a sec," Casey asked Raph, keeping some distance for the minute, "I, look, I didn't wanna tell yer this way, I wanted it t' be, yanno, special..."

He swallowed back the fear, and began to ramble as quickly as he could, in a desperate hope that Raph wouldn't have more questions to ask,

"Look, I was born as a woman okay? My name was Eve, I was named after my ma, but growin' up I never felt like a girl, always felt like a guy, so parents an' I wen' t' docs, got some talks an' whatever long story short I'm taking hormones t' be a guy, 'cause I am a guy, that's why my name is Casey an' not Eve," He breathes out, needing a minute, "An', every month, 'cause I still got a pussy, I bleed, 'cause biology or whatever the fuck, I can't stop it, las' like a week, an' uh...yeah I think that's everythin'."

If he got his way, Casey would've had them up on the roof, having dinner under the stars as he talked about everything, opened up and such. But hey, things can't always go his way. Maybe in another World where Raph wasn't a vampire.

"Now I got a question for yer - yer uh wanna taste it or am I jus' waistin' my time standin' 'ere in pain."

| Muse interaction

It wasn't the first time Raphael picked up on the constant smell of blood from Casey. Even before getting bitten he did have a pretty good sense of smell. All of them had a pretty strong sense of smell, something they kept after mutation. So Raph always tended to associate the smell of lynx and ice to Casey. Sometimes he would just say Casey smelled like the inside of a plenty box with a mix of the scents their hockey gear and sweat added to their usual smell already. With the nice little crisp smell that ice seemed to carry. It was very much how he tend to know when Casey came from practice he never brought it up before because well would that be weird? To tell you best friend that you like how they smell? Maybe. Your boyfriend? mm maybe not Raph's suffered enough of Mikey's romance flicks to know humans say that. But pretty sure humans can't tell their partner just how exactly their scent smelled. Seeing how the scent could carry on to Raphael's bed after Casey been over. Or on to hoodies Raph borrowed from them. But still telling Casey in that much detail might be weird. Even if Casey was beyond weird himself.

Though since the whole 'Raphs a vampire' thing Raphael can smell a bit better than before. Mostly blood, he can tell even from small cuts alone. And sure Casey could come around with some scraps here and there but blood scent was different when fresh and old. But sometimes? Casey had a constant smell of blood coming off of him? Last time it happened Raphael thought Casey got hurt and was hiding it. If he could move shouldn't be a big deal. But once again? As Raphael had sneaked over to hang out with his poor sick boyfriend he could smell it and it was strong. Raphael quirked his beak and looked them over.

Eyes narrowing Casey looked like he was in pain hardly wanting to move around as they greeted him. Raphael looked around the room a moment not having even given a hi back as he started going through anything he could. Flipping objects over throwing some as his search became a bit more hasty. Ignoring Casey when they obviously start to ask what he was doing. When Raph can't find anything though and turns around to face Casey hes crosses his arms over himself and narrows his eyes at them.

"Okay what stupid ass thing didja do now?" He jumps to accuse them right away Casey looks like they are ready to play dumb however as they just give him a look that sells the act pretty well for Casey's sake here. "Dude I can smell blood!" Raph just goes to express not having the patience for some back and forth here. "So what the fuck did you do now? Is being sick you tryin' to cover up? What got ya ass whopped so bad you would die from the embarrassment?" yes cause picking a fight with Casey was clearly the answer here. Well least if he ticked them off enough they might tell him what happened. Prideful. "Or is big bad Casey Jones gettin' pushed around on the ice?" he smirks now showing hes baiting Casey. Though for some reason it back fired on to Raphael. Moving over to Casey as he starts grabbing at them forcing them out of their comfort.

"Did someone actually get you with like the blades or somethin'?" no longer trying to annoy an answer out when worry go in Raphael was looking on their bed for any sign of blood. He turned to look back at Casey, sniffing at them a second it really smelled fresh. He shot Casey a look before setting his hand on them feeling for any wet spots along thier back or sides even. "I can tell your bleedin' right now! And ya holding your swlf like it hurts. I swear mutant vampire what ever if one of 'em hurt you I will go hunt 'em down."

"Look, relax, I can explain!"

"Well you betta! Give me names and addresses!" Raphael shouts back Casey's own statement didn't really easy him off the idea someone hurt him.

"Jus' chill okay, gimme a sec,"

Raphael watched them step back a little as tnej put some space between them. Raphael just quirked his beak. A little part of him debated, not dealing with the beating around the bush bussniess here. And making Casey tell him, but another part of him said that hypnotizing the answer out of Casey might be crossing some line here. Besides, he's not even sure if it works that way.

"I, look, I didn't wanna tell yer this way, I wanted it t' be, yanno, special…"

Well, now he was curious, crocking his head to the side even as he raised a brow. Special? What in the world could him bleeding have to do with anything to make it out for a whole speical set up to go with? He wasn't doing it on purpose or anything, was he? Did he tell Don about how Raph had fed off of them? Maybe Don was taking blood from Casey for his synthetic crap? Way to fix the taste issue? Admitly, raph might still feed off Casey even if that were the case simply because feeding off Casey was arousing and hot as fuck. Even if they hadn't done much beyond kissing it did add some fun there.

Raphaels guesses were far off the mark here, but he had no way to guess the real answer here. Maybe he was drawing blood now even? Hmm nah Raph would see more evidence of that right? Hand to his chin as he looks at Casey. He's had his blood draw before by Don so he knew how it worked. Who would be dumb enough to trust Casey to draw his own blood. Shifting his attesting back to Casey now. He should at least really give them his attetion he guesses.

"Look, I was born as a woman okay? My name was Eve, I was named after my ma, but growin' up I never felt like a girl, always felt like a guy, so parents an' I wen' t' docs, got some talks an' whatever long story short I'm taking hormones t' be a guy, 'cause I am a guy, that's why my name is Casey an' not Eve,"

Raphaels eyes widen a little for a moment there not because of what he was being told person mote how it was said was causing the reaction as Casey let out all of his explanations in nearly one breath here.

"An', every month, 'cause I still got a pussy, I bleed, 'cause biology or whatever the fuck, I can't stop it, las' like a week, an' uh…yeah I think that's everythin'."

Raphael just stood there for a moment he opened his beak a moment before closing it. Ready to ask a question, but it sort of got answered on its own. As did the next three thar had him repeat the same action. April's complained about a period before he's certien he's heard things here and there about it not too know much else, other then apperently it brought a lot of discomfort. And there may be bleeding invovled?

Taking in the look of Casey bed. It looked like a nest nearly woth how the had thoer blankets and pillows. Would also explain why he could smell the blood as well.

"Now I got a question for yer - yer uh wanna taste it or am I jus' waistin' my time standin' 'ere in pain."

Raphael's attention went back to Casey "taste?" Perking at the question considering Casey had pretty much become a source of food for him, he just wasn't following the course of the conversation at the moment. Until it hit him, he swears blood was rushing to his face. What did Casey say before? Eye lowered their gaze very obviously down at Casey's legs.

Drinking Casey blood was always on the table some things hadn't been and Raphael understood why, well partly why. Casey just hadn't explained the whole him be Trans thing till just now. They would have to get into the why's later because slowly pieces were connecting in the turtles fried brain. He still looked back up to casey and down between his legs a few times before he finally spoke up. "Wait when you say taste?" The look on Casey face was really the only confirmation needed here. And Raph better act quick so Casey wasn't wasting his time.

"Yes." He says quicker then meant but he didn't care as he moved to help Casey sit back on his bed smirking now. "Don' gotta tell me twice, maybe it'll distract you little from the pain?" Raphael offers before moving to help Casey lie back. Fingers hooking into the waist band of thier pants before he slowly moves to pull them off. The smell.of blood was stronger as he got Casey free from the confinement.

He did feel slightly hesitant here though, the want for blood and the other desires burning between his own legs now were both all for this. But inexperience was clearly shining here. Casey was his first well everything and this was for sure a big one. Swallowing down any worry though so not to make it appernet to Casey he moved to nestle between Casey's legs setting them up over his shoulders to help Casey get more comfortable. The scent was driving him crazy as he looked back up at Casey.

"Yeah I dunno how long you thought you would be able to get away with keepin' this from me." He smirks a little to tease. He just hopes Casey ain't expecting this to be all that great the first time. "Jus' lie back I'll take care of you." But hey taking like it might be? May help he hopes he's sort if making this up as he goes a bit different from bitting or making out with Casey after all. Gently rubbing at their thighs to help ease Casey and ground his own thoughts. There was way to much to think about right now.

Casey's select, Casey's offer, Raph's two different lusts acting up? One thing at a time, and he rather focused on Casey's offer.

[empirexsin]

his mind is but a web of complex thoughts - each upon a neverending string within his head. each thought passes like the winter's wind, cold and harsh, enough to present him with this feeling of anxiety and dread. but before he can focus upon one thought, another arrives in his mind, tormenting him with those same feelings, until he finds himself swarmed by them, too entangled in its web to find an escape.

the same feeling he has when he is alone, in the dark. still terrified of the darkness, in the same way he had been when he were but a lonely child. perhaps he has more reasons to be scared than strange creatures lingering under his bed now. perhaps the only strange, ambivalent, ominous creature he finds himself afraid of - abler of life and death - is himself. and how many ghosts linger around him, tormented by their death's, and without the same power they had in life when struck by his sword or torched by a flame he had burned their home down with.

" the soil is the great connector of lives, the source and destination of all " his voice, as powerful as it has always been - enough to draw attention to himself in a crowded room - but even his presence is so intense, that no words need to be spoken most of the time anyway. " age into youth, death into life " he had not sought to care for the flowers during their distance. during the turning of the tide, that had meant such feelings between them had turned sour.

his actions to her, could be described as nothing less than barbaric. to send her away. to have debated of her death. and for what? the selfish protection of himself - of his ego. but none of these actions had made him feel better. none had soothed the depths of his soul. and now the flowers have died. wiltered. they look grey and fragile. almost turned to dust.

he has not seen her face in sometime. has not been face to face with her as they are now. or at least - her back to his front. this would be the time his usual demand would shine through, a demand that she does not turn her back to her emperor. but he is silent. allows it for now. when the air seems crisp. when life wilts around them - in his, always in his, presence. " without proper care for it, there is no life " a murmur that means many thing. his words, always dense with meaning. tormented still by the image of her - for what he feels confuses him. always considering that if he were to have found her dead, in the snow as she had been before when he had saved her, that he would have been relieved after his initial sorrow. that selfishly, he would have been relieved to have not felt an enormity of feelings towards her so strong that they weigh his shoulders down stronger than armor.

Crying

closed starter: @empirexsin

based on: [ crying ] sender finds receiver crying

...

Healing. A notion endlessly uttered by servants and healers alike, faceless mirages fluttering in and out of peripheral consciousness as days blended into weeks. Mornings spent in a steaming bath followed by a meal of warm tea and fresh fruit. Afternoons of mild activity under the watchful gaze of a healer before another meal. Evenings of slumber beneath plentiful layers…A subdued existence confined to a single room. Lingering effects of hypothermia had unequivocally taken their toll with slow movements and muscle weakness hanging overhead much like a vice, anchoring her in place. In those initial days Marinette continuously strained herself, a fear of displaying weakness driving her to overexertion much to the healers’ dismay. Only in the second week did she finally begin to heed their instructions, fragmented emotions having dulled enough to understand the risk of permanent damage otherwise. 

Whisperings of servants gave the impression her return to Rome was not widely known with only healers ever calling her by name. In some ways it seemed befitting for was she not a traitor? Had she not been declared dead months prior? Such thoughts were constant when she first arrived, yet by now were no more than wisps. Her words were sparse, little more than polite remarks interspersing bouts of silence. If she were quiet enough she could make out faint voices of passersby, often sitting near the door or window to sate idle curiosity. These snippets of conversation were given new life in letters she wrote everyday, crafting an illusion of fiction on the page to then be stowed away until the following day.  

In time Marinette’s strength returned enough to peek out her door before slipping down the corridor. With no particular destination in mind she merely wandered, familiarizing herself with what was once her home. Murmurs of her name fell on deaf ears, paying no mind when old acquaintances scurried out of sight. Perhaps they will think I'm a ghost. Such sentiments brought a faint smile to her face. Good. Without realizing it she eventually found herself standing at the entrance of her old quarters. Seconds carried the weight of days, breaths deepening as she could only stand outside, torn between daring to enter or simply going on her way. It’s not mine anymore. Leave it be. An action easier said than done with her ultimately passing through the threshold. 

“Oh.” Where she expected to find another’s belongings among lavish furnishings she instead only found the former.  “I wonder what happened?” Whispering, her touch trailed over the bed frame, brows knitting at past memories. Nights spent wrapped in a warm embrace, fingers tangling in dark locks amidst tender kisses…A blink brought her back to reality, abrupt steps carrying her further along until she stood on the edge of the garden to find nothing. Once blooming flowers were now withered stems, lush grass now short and ashen with only a lone tree remaining. Words bubbled in her throat yet no sound came out, breaths growing short and shallow as she sunk to the floor. It’s all gone. All of it. Emotions best left buried simmered to life. Her excitement upon first arriving in Rome. Curiosity and reverence for the Emperor. Nervousness and  attraction upon catching his eye. Love and devotion once caught in his web. Helpless and terrified when cast towards death. Resentful and desolate in a determination to survive…An entire saga to somehow find herself back in this very place.

Tears stained her cheeks though she was too numb to realize, unconsciously digging her nails into unforgiving soil. Perhaps it was fitting that no one seemed to live here at the moment. Perhaps no one ever would. Perhaps it would be burned to ashes- another home lost to his flame.

[notenoughfanficofthis]

Present Time (part 3 of fun’s over)

Idk if I made it clear to y’all but I’m not a writer this material purpose is to inspire people to make something better in this genre. (Dark!Morpheus) I shall not rest until we have enough fanfic of this!

Part 2 was how they met, Part 3 continues after part 1

18+ Dark!Morpheus

His touch always felt cold and crisp reminds me of freshly fallen snow but it always left me as warm as a midsummer day. Fire and ice is what his touch -his love felt like. Unpredictable, unprecedented, unexpected but never unloved, unwanted he made sure of that. It’s true he is a passionate lover and love maker but the lines of boundaries are faded and nonexistent to him.

I do not hate him for what he’s done.

But I do not forgive him to taking away my humanity.

I tried to hate him once upon a time ago but I couldn’t find it in my heart to do so very long. How could I? Morpheus in his own way is devoted to me me- a mere mortal. Though, I didn’t believe myself to be anything special he made me feel as though I was his whole world. His love, his touch, his words, those eyes it’s what kept me bound to him, I truly do love him. But can’t I love being a human too. Why must I forget in order to be with my love.

Gravity in the dream realm was different, much different then it is in the waking world. It felt lighter, softer its hard to describe perhaps it’s close as being embraced by a cloud of rose petals.

It’s the first thing that I notice as i began to wake from my slumber. Before I open my eyes I can already tell where I am, back in our room layed out on the beautiful silk star speckled sheets his breathe against my skin and the softness of the sheet gives me a clue that I’m laid bare before him.

“I know you’re awake, my love. Open your eyes.” He’s close , too close and opening my eyes to find him hovering above me I can’t help but let a tear escape me.

“I missed you… my king.” Feeling overwhelmed with a whirl of different emotions one stood out the most. Desperation.

He looked taken aback not expecting those to be her first words but his expression soften as he knew no doubt that his love had not forgotten him. He remains silent hovering over his love a thin sheet seperating his clothed body from resting upon her bare skin. How much she has changed but yet remained the same he can’t help but notice.

She cries harder sitting up to wrap her arms around his shoulders. He lets her embrace him basking in the warmth of her touch. How much he’s missed this. He let himself momentarily forget the betrayal as he runs his hands along the curve of her body reminiscent of all the times they’ve laid on this bed. It’s been too long.

“I… how could you leave me..” she continued not backing away from her embrace instead burying her head further into his shoulders tear staining the front of his coat “You take me from my home.. that i could forgive but to leave me behind with nothing after everything!” Her sadness begins to turn to anger. Finally letting their eyes meet pulling away from him just enough to take in each other forms. “Where have you been.”

He was speechless he had almost forgotten the fire that burned in his lover, how long he yearned to be burned by it. He takes a moment to respond taking in her form wiping away her tears of sadness. Sensing her frustrations at his lack of answer he lunged forward in a hard suggestive kiss. One she can’t help but return all while running her fingers through his hair getting lost in the remembrance of his embrace. Laying his love back onto the black star speckled silk sheets being careful not to remove himself from her lips as he did so. They spend a moment basking in each other’s intimate embrace letting their actions speak for itself as to how much they’ve missed each other.

Finally pulling away but keeping his body flushed against her own he finally gives his answer. “I.. did not leave you, my love. I was held captive by an amateur sorcerer and soon after his son. I did not abandon my realm or it’s subjects nor would I have left you on my own volition.” The shock on her face made it clear to him that she truly believed he had abandoned her. After all he had done to show her devotion she thinks so lowly of him.

She can sense his frustration rising as the hold on her body had tightened “Even so, you’ve used my imprisonment to escape me once again, my love.” He leans down to harshly whisper in her ear as though he was telling a secret. Chills run down her spine as she felt the room darken, trying to find a distraction she takes a look around the room noticing what’s left of it’s decaying nature. He follows her gaze the sight before him causes him to lose focus for a moment on his anger and let his sadness apparent to his love at the decaying of his once beautiful realm.

“Even being amongst my own I have never forgotten you, my king. It’ll be hard too when my whole being and immortality is the result of our love.” She brings his gaze back onto her gently caressing his cheek shamelessly keeping her gaze on his lips

“Nevertheless you seemed to par just fine in my absence” His anger is back.

“I thought you had abandoned me!” She yelled back defiantly “Thought perhaps you had gotten bored and left me behind!” Tears begin flowing down the side of her eyes as she continues her rant “What was i to do?! All alone in a realm i do not belong!”

He allowed this to continue only for a bit longer before reaching down to cut her off with a kiss. Understanding her reasonings the pain from her betrayal still has not lightened but he couldn’t help himself when hes been apart from her for so long, reminiscing how her skin felt against his own the sounds of melody she sings for him as they devote their love for each other. It’s been too long. Ripping away the sheet that divided them and any clothing that would’ve caused such a problem he laid his now bare body against her own all while not breaking the kiss.

The tears and anger shared between the two had been momentarily forgotten as they pull away taking in each other’s bare form. Instead, they feel the built up of their long awaited reunion cloud their head in the best of ways.

“Morpheus..” she calls in the lightest of tones. She can feel him nudging between her lips teasing her as he remained hovering over his lover leaving no area of her body untouched by his eyes.

In that tone alone he knew what she was asking for. Normally foreplay plays a big role in their lovemaking but the desperation the yearning the longing was too much to bare any longer as he finally pressed into his lover giving her what they’ve both longed for.

Though the question had crossed his mind being inside his lover his unasked question had been answered, she hadn’t taken another lover since his imprisonment. The feeling of that knowledge alone was enough to leave him in a frenzy letting go of all restraints, the cries she lets out as he ravished her body drowning in the feeling that this was better then he remembered. She almost forgot how well they’re made to fit each other who she belongs too, he will remind her.

Their love making felt as endless as morpheus and his siblings before they finally part from each other. Exhausted and sweaty she can’t help but limply watch her lover rise from the bed. “My king… where are you going?”

“During my imprisonment my relics had been stolen by my captures and then stolen from them. I must go back to the waking world to retrieve what’s left of my items. Until then, my love, you will remain here until my work is done. Then, together we shall rebuild this realm and my kingdom.”

She shot up for where she laid but whatever magic morpheus had gained back was enough to hold her down into the bed unable to move any further. Frustrated at this discovery but nevertheless she reached out a hand to him beckoning him to come back to bed with her “Please!, don’t leave, not yet it’s been so long” she cried out to him.

Dressed he walked around the bed they’ve laid and made love on until he was at the side his lover remained. Crouching down to her level his gives her a farewell kiss on the head as she begins to silently cry again. “I must as I can not trust you in the waking world. You’re betrayal is too great and can not be left unpunished.”

She froze. She had hoped he would’ve taken pity, that he would’ve forgiven her when hearing her reasonings but she almost forgot the kind of being her lover is. Petty and beautiful. She stood silent and awaited the next words that she knew would speak of her punishment.

“Your love for humanity has become troublesome, it’s the one thing that’s kept you, my love, from devoting yourself completely to me and my realm. You hold on to the thought of one day going back to a realm that is no longer your home. Despite that to appease you I had allowed you to dream of being amongst them but you had taken advantage of my kindness. Nightmares would only do so much so for your punishment, I have decided to take away your dreams of humanity. All your memories of your time spent in the waking world will be nothing but a sense of dejavú.” He spoke these words as though he was speaking sweet nothings as if her whole world hadn’t fell apart before her.

He shushes her as she begins to sob heavily leaning her into his chest. Stroking her hair letting his love get what she’s feeling out of her system he knows this is for the best. He almost feels guilty for what has to be done but he had to be sure she will remain devoted to him and him only. He can not let this happen again.

As her cries begin to diminish he lays her tired body back onto the silk sheets covering her shivering bare body. Beginning his descent out of the room he stills momentarily hearing the cold words of his lover.

“To think you would’ve taken pity on me after now knowing what it’s like to be imprisoned. Some things really do not change, my king.”

This angers him but he does not respond exiting the room letting the slam of the door from his departure fill the silence.

I do not hate him for what he’s done.

But, I can not forgive him.

She sobbed to herself chanting those words until it’s burned into her very soul.

[gretavanlace]

Let Me Call You Sweetheart (Part 2)

Josh Kiszka x reader

18+ only! Minors do not interact!

Warnings: graphic sexual content, swearing, dirty talk, etc.

You wake the next morning curled up in a sea of crisp sheets and blankets to find Josh seated beside you on the edge of your bed, bearing two cups of steaming hot tea.

“Here, sweetheart.” he smiles, extending the light blue mug in his hand. “Chamomile with a sprinkle of cinnamon.”

“You remembered.” You feel silly about the grin you can’t suppress, it’s only a beverage, but no, it isn’t, it’s so much more. It’s a physical reminder that he cares enough to learn everything about you...no matter how seemingly insignificant.

He brushes a gentle kiss over your forehead and then straightens to sip carefully from his own mug. “Did you sleep well?”

“Mhmm.” you blush at the endearing display of affection, and then tug on the neck of his t-shirt, which just happens to be draped over you. “Comfy.”

“It looks good on you.” he adjusts the shirt, smoothing his hand down your ribcage.

“Last night was...” you falter, searching for words to do it justice, but the English language boasts none that could ever come close to describing what last night was.

He seems to understand your unfinished thought. Even better, he agrees. “Yes, last night definitely was...”

“Thank you.” your eyes flicker down shyly. It’s a strange thing to be thanking him for, or at least it feels strange...but you’ve never been more thankful in your life, and he should know it.

He hums in soft delight. “No need to thank me, sweetheart. Trust me. I probably enjoyed myself even more than you did. I’ve been waiting a very long time for that.”

“Oh.” You nod, unable to form a more coherent thought, because now you’re reliving the events in question silently in your head.

He mercifully lets it go and changes the subject. “Are you hungry, baby?”

‘Baby’ makes your heart flutter. It causes an entire colony of butterflies to take flight in your stomach, as a shiver trickles down from the top of your head. It makes you feel small, and loved, protected, treasured.

Maybe you should say those things to him. You know Josh better than you know yourself, and he would love that such a simple thing has garnered such a lovely reaction; but, you take the cowards way out. “A little. Are you? I could make us something. Or we could—”

He cuts you off with a teasing grin “Are you trying to rob me of the pleasure of making breakfast for my best girl? After I was so sweet to her last night? That’s just mean.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” you grin right back, feeling the warmth of a blush spreading across your cheeks as you watch him meander out of the room in nothing but his pants. His bare feet padding out of the room charm you, and how is his back so alluring? He reminds you of art. Living, breathing, art.

After your shower, you step out and eye your robe. It waits just like always, hanging on the back of your door looking plush and inviting but you find you want nothing to do with it simply because it isn’t his. So instead, after you brush your teeth and run a comb through your hair, you opt to throw Josh’s t-shirt back over your head, along with a fresh pair of panties.

You find him singing softly to himself as he plates two beautifully executed omelets alongside buttered toast. “Hi.” he tilts his head, a dish in each hand. “Don’t you look cute?”

He wiggles his hips a little, miming for you to do a little spin for him. You oblige and then giggle when he groans dramatically. “You’re a vision, sweetheart. A goddess in which I, a mere mortal, am unworthy.”

“Come on, theater kid.” you roll your eyes playfully and move towards the table.

“Actually, I thought we’d eat in the living room.” he sounds mischievous. “On the couch. You know, the scene of the crime?”

A flicker of heat kicks up in your chest as, once more, everything that happened, everything he gave you, returns to the forefront of your thoughts.

You enjoy your breakfast together, feeling just as at ease and comfortable as always. If not, more so, incredibly. The laughter comes easily and you’d like to drop to your knees and thank the heavens that nothing has been lost or ruined between you and Josh.

A quiet settles between the two of you as you lounge on the couch. Of course, Josh being Josh can’t stand the silence for long, and he is the first to break it. “I can’t stop thinking about it.” he confesses, lolling his head lazily on the back of the couch to look at you. “Last night, fuck, you were so pretty and sweet. Do you even realize how gorgeous and sexy you are?”

“What about you?” your voice sounds different, even to yourself. Smokey and raspy with a deep carnal craving. “I can’t stop thinking about the way you made me feel, and I’m not only talking about the orgasms. You made me feel adored...like I meant enough to be doted on.”

“You do mean enough to be doted on, baby.” he whispers, reaching out to cup his warm hand around your cheek. ‘And I do adore you, I always have.”

A long stretch of intense, but calm eye contact is indulged in and then he nods his head so subtly you almost don’t catch it. “Come over here, sweetheart.”

He guides you into his lap and rests his cheek against your chest, listening to the rapidly increasing drum of your heart, while you run your hands through his curls and over the nape of his neck with every down stroke.

When his head tilts up to press his lips into yours, your nails scrape lightly over his scalp, pulling him in closer with a breathy gasp.

That small sound seems to be the shotgun blast that signals your bodies— and suddenly you’re both just a little more frantic. Hands everywhere, squeezing and pulling, hungry to feel and possess each other as your mouths work together, urgently tasting the desire pouring out of you both and swallowing the moans and sighs that are now floating out on a near continuous loop.

His mouth is sucking a blissful trail up your neck as his hand begins to tease over your panties. “You’re soaked, sweetheart. I think someone’s a little spoiled already.”

“That’s your fault.” you retort half-heartedly through a shivering chill of want. “Are you gonna fuck me now?”

He slips into your underwear and wets his fingers inside you before bringing them up to your clit to circle over the swollen bundle of nerves. “Is that what you want?”

Your forehead drops against his as you grind into his hand. “Yeah, that’s exactly what I want.”

Nodding as if he’s never heard anything he’s ever agreed with more, he taps your ass lightly. “Lift up, baby.”

You freeze, because you understand exactly where this is heading and you feel like a prudish deer caught in his beautiful headlights.

Right away, his tone switches from lustful to concerned. “What’s wrong, love? Where’d you go?”

“I just,” you feel so on display and aware of yourself. “I’ve never been on top before.”

“Oh.” the purest smile tugs at his beautiful lips. “That’s alright, sweetheart. Lay down for me.”

You strengthen your grip on his shoulders and shake your head. “No, I want this. But...will you, I don’t know...” god, you can’t find the words, nor the ability to speak them. Now you’re an inexperienced idiot who’s brain has also unremorsefully betrayed her. Perfect.

Josh brushes your hair away from your face and allows his eyes to linger, drinking you in. “You want me to talk you through it? Is that what you’re asking, baby?”

A nod seems like the safest bet, but you throw in a timid, “Will you?” when your gaze finds his soft, honeyed eyes.

“Of course I will, sweetheart.” he assures, settling your nerves just that easily. “But you don’t have to, this is a lot of firsts all at once.”

Your lips find his in lieu of arguing and simultaneously your hips resume their gentle rocking down against him. “I know, but I want to, Josh. I want to ride you.” you pant when his hidden cock catches your clit just right. “Teach me how. Show me how you like it.”

He draws in a breath to collect himself, and you’re pleased to see how much he obviously wants you too. “Not just me, love. Us. We’re gonna learn how we like it...” he corrects gently. “...together.”

Dipping down, you nuzzle the tip of your nose against his and then catch his lips in a demure kiss that doesn’t match the fact that your laps are writhing around together wildly.

“I want to watch you cum first.” he whispers, licking into your mouth.

For a moment, you are one hundred percent certain he could unravel you by simply saying things like that to you in that beautifully low register of his. “I love your voice.” you confess, circling your hands loosely around his throat to hold him in place, you want to see his eyes. “When you speak to me, it's like the entire world has disappeared and we’re the only ones left. It's always felt that way to me.”

His hands have moved up to frame your face, thumbs caressing your cheekbones so tenderly “That’s because when I look at you, when I talk to you, you’re all I can see, sweetheart. You’re the whole world and everything in it.”

Without missing a beat, and with his eyes still burning into yours, he lifts you up off his lap just far enough to unbutton his pants and shove them down around his ankles. You listen to him kick them off and excitedly bite down on your lip. The thrill of having him inside of you is quickly overpowering your taxed nerves. However, he seems to have other plans for you, because his boxer briefs remain on as he settles you back down, this time straddling his thigh rather than in his lap.

The warmth of his thigh between your legs is sublime and your body takes over instinctively, grinding down against him, creating the most delicious friction as the dampened fabric covering your clit slides against it.

“That’s it, sweetheart.” His praise is so softly intoxicating, and you can’t decide whether it’s that, or the sensation between your legs that has you so worked up so quickly “You look so pretty. Does that feel good?”

A tiny nod accompanied by a whimper is all you manage to muster before your head tosses back in pleasure. He drifts his hands beneath his shirt and pulls it up and off of you, tossing it aside to land somewhere next to his pants on the floor.

“So beautiful, baby.” he murmurs, leaning forward to place scattered kisses upon your breasts, purposely ignoring your nipples just to stir you up a little more, but only until you issue a needy, “Please, Josh.”

His warm mouth closes around your pebbled flesh, sucking delicately as he pinches the other with barely there pressure. His free hand drops to your hip as he sucks at your tit, urging you to ride his thigh a little faster. When a desperate moan escapes you, he pulls away with a little pop. “Come on, sweetheart. Cum for me. You’re making such a mess, baby. Feels so good, so warm.”

He’s absolutely right, you are making a mess of his leg, absolutely dripping, to the point that you have to grind down much more aggressively to achieve the friction you need through the slick.

You can’t seem to catch your breath, and it feels like passing out is a very real possibility but you maintain your urgent pace because you’re so close you can almost taste it on your tongue like the sweetest sugar– and because you know he would cradle you in his arms and keep you safe until your were coherent once again.

“Fuck,” he groans, digging his fingers into your waist. “Look at you, you’re so close. Let it go, beautiful, I wanna see it.”

His name tumbles from your lips as your own hands find your breasts. “I’m gonna cum...please.”

“You don’t need to beg me, sweetheart...this is all you. Just keep going, just like that. Take what you need.” his words sound choked and forced, almost like he’s the one peering over the edge of an orgasm instead of you. “God, you’re so fucking perfect.”

It flutters down over you like a clean sheet snapped in the air over a mattress. It covers your world in warm, white light, bathing you in soft pleasure that you want to drown in, but only if you could pull him under and take him with you. When your eyes drift open after what seems like a very long time, you find him watching you intensely, with the tip of his tongue caught between his teeth, chest heaving with quick, shallow breaths.

“I could watch you cum for the rest of my life and never, ever, get tired of it. You’re the most exquisite thing I’ve ever laid eyes on. You make my heart ache.” He sounds hushed, as if he is in awe of something greater than himself, but he has never been more wrong in his life, for nothing could ever be greater than him, he is everything.

He strokes your hair and peppers pecks of innocent kisses over your cheeks, calming you as you catch your breath until he lifts you up. Maybe you should be ashamed by the way your soaked panties peel away from his thigh when he raises you up, but judging by the way he bites at his bottom lip when he feels it, you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.

“Are you sure, sweetheart?” he wraps his arms around you and pulls you to his chest once you’re seated fully in his lap again. “Because I’d be happy to lay you down right here and do all the work. You wanna be my little pillow princess?” he throws in, just to tease you and lighten the mood.

“No, I’m sure.” your nails ghost down his chest and then venture lower to cup him over his boxer briefs. His cock is straining against the fabric, hard and warm to the touch, and he sucks in the sexiest hiss of a breath the moment your hand presses against it. When you sink your hand beneath his waistband and wrap your fingers and palm around his length, the most breathtaking sound you have ever heard slips past his lips. “Oh my god,” you shiver as your body physically responds to it “I could listen to you forever.”

His tongue sweeps out over his lips, reminding you of what he can do to you with it. “Your hand is so soft, baby. I can’t imagine how soft and sweet you’re gonna feel around me when I’m inside you.”

In response, you push his boxers down as far as you can and drop your stare from his eyes to his lap. “Oh fuck...” you breathe when you catch sight of it. Is it possible for a dick to be that pretty? And bigger than you imagined, bigger than it had felt in your hand even, but not obnoxiously so. It’s just right, perfectly shaped and flawless, of course it is. It’s his.

He can’t help the smirk playing over his lips with pride, but it quickly fades into a look of unbridled desire when you boldly begin dragging the tip through your folds. You feel cautiously confident until you nudge him down closer to your entrance. Is there a certain angle or positioning? What if you hurt him?

Sensing your apprehension, he takes over with a loving kiss blessing your cheek. “Here, sweetheart, let me.”

Slipping just the tip in, he holds you up in his lap as you both gasp in unison. “Now just lower yourself down nice and easy, baby.” he coaxes patiently. “Go slow, we’re not in any rush, are we?”

You nod your understanding and take your time descending down around his length. He stretches and fills you inch by inch, sinking you deeper into a satin pit of pleasure the deeper he sinks into you. The struggle of restraint is painted across his beautiful features, and it melts your heart to see him work so hard to be so careful with you.

When you are fully seated in his lap with his cock buried inside you, he reaches up and takes your face in his hands. “You feel like absolute heaven, sweetheart. I never want to leave.”

Your heart flutters around in the cage of your chest like a little bird. The way your body physically reacts when he speaks to you is astounding. You part your lips to tell him, but he places his palm over your heart and whispers, “I know, baby.”

The moment lingers on and then you draw your stare away from his hand and look at him through your lashes shyly. “So do I just...”

You trail off because, of course you do, god forbid you form a complete sentence in his presence.

“Like this, love.” his warm hands slip under your thighs and you let out a quiet moan as his fingers dig lightly into your skin. He lifts you up just a little and then slides you back down around him with a groan, and just that miniscule movement is enough to drag the head of his cock against that sensitive spot deep inside you. Your back arches and he smiles, dragging his hand down the curve of your spine. “You like that, sweet girl?”

“Yeah... “ you nod, furrowing your brow in concentration, you want to feel it over and over and over again, but he holds you down against him.

“We’re gonna go slow, remember, baby?” he tucks a lock of your hair behind your ear and then trails his fingers down your jaw. “Can you be gentle for me, sweetheart? So I don’t finish too fast? I want to feel you cum around my cock, and you’ve got me so turned on I can hardly stand it. Can you feel how hard I am inside you?”

His voice, and the things he’s whispering to you as his fingers brush continuously over your tingling skin, coupled with the way you’re so absolutely filled to the brim with him, has you beside yourself with need. You’ve never wanted anything so desperately than you want this moment to never end.

“Good girl.” he soothes, when you give him another nod of understanding. “I want you to just move for me, alright? Whatever feels good...you’ve got this, baby.”

You begin rolling your hips gently, rocking yourself just right so that your clit grinds against the base of his length each time you push forward. “Oh my god...” you gasp, eyes widening in surprise, you never imagined sex could feel this way.

“So good, sweetheart.” his eyes scrunch closed in lust but then immediately pop back open to watch you, unwilling to miss a moment. “You’re doing so well. Feels so good. You’re such a good girl, aren’t you? Are you my sweet girl?”

“Josh, please...” your hips pick up the pace, but you’re careful to keep your movement controlled. “Keep talking.”

“Do you know how good you feel, sweetheart?” he croons, thrusting up to meet you gently. “How pretty you sound? How beautiful you are? I don’t deserve you...no one deserves you. You’re too perfect, you belong in a painting in a gallery, only to be admired.”

“My little poet.” you tease through a gasp.

“You’re perfect, love...” he drops his head back against the couch when you lean back, effectively changing up his angle inside of you. “That’s my girl. Keep fucking me, just like that.”

Hearing him word it that way, the way he draws attention to the fact that you are fucking him, makes you feel beautiful and empowered, and despite his instructions, you begin to move faster. You ignore his gentle protests and the burning in your thighs from exertion, and keep going, burying your hands in his curls with your foreheads pressed together.

“Fuck, sweetheart...you have to stop, I’m gonna cum.” he warns in a choked whisper. “You feel so good...too fucking good.”

“Just a little longer.” you beg, working yourself over his cock even harder. You’re so close.

He nods urgently, wrapping his arms around your back as his lips crash into yours. “I want you to cum for me, sweet girl.” he pants into your mouth. “Can you do that for me, baby? I want you to cum pretty for me while I’m inside you, yeah?”

“Yeah...” Now it’s your turn to nod urgently, simply because you couldn’t handle anything more complicated than that right now if you tried.

His mouth drops down and finds your throat, sucking and biting gently...urging you closer to the edge. “Don’t stop, Josh. Please...” you beg, cradling his head in your arms as they wrap around him.

“I’m not gonna stop, sweet girl.” he swears. “I’m gonna give you what you need, I promise, baby.”

The push and pull of him inside you has you writhing atop him like you’re suffering through physical pain, which obviously couldn’t be further from the truth. Right now, you’re not sure you even remember the definition of the word pain, it’s so far removed from the throes of pleasure rocking your body this way and that. “I’m gonna cum.” you cry, dropping your head back while you pull his mouth closer to your neck. You feel him hesitate, and you can tell he wants to hold you still so he can collect himself “Please, Josh...fuck, please. Don’t make me stop.”

“Not gonna make you stop, sweetheart.” his hands are dragging up and down your back, desperately trying to hold on for you.

You’ve never been loud in bed. Then again, before Josh, you’ve never been given much of a reason to be loud. But the sounds that explode out of you when the impact of your orgasm levels you, could rival that of the most dramatic adult film actress, but you won’t know that until later, when you revisit the moment in your memory, because right now you are totally and completely lost in it, and in Josh, and the way your bodies seem to work together like they were always destined to connect and meld into one this way.

Your release signals the go ahead for him as well and if you could choose one moment in time to live inside for all of eternity, it would be this one, listening to him let it all go, buried so deeply inside you it’s hard to tell where you end and he begins. He sounds like a song...like a heartbreakingly haunting hymn...right now, he is your god, and his body your church, the altar you kneel before to offer silent prayers. You love him. You know this, you have always known this.

You collapse into his arms as he folds himself around you protectively, neither of you uttering a word as you try to chase after your breath and clear your blurry heads.

“I love you, too.” he finally whispers after a long stretch of silence. “I have for such a long time.”

Did you say the words aloud when you thought them? You’d feel mortified if it were anyone but him. He sets your soul at ease just by existing.

“Say it again.” you sigh, nuzzling into his chest.

“I love you, sweetheart.”

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