#this could be the morning of the event alr so it still counts <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[aresenics]

 𝒻𝑜𝓇  :   @classiqcals   !

𝔣𝔢𝔞𝔱𝔲𝔯𝔦𝔫𝔤  :   vero   &    zehab    .

𝕝𝕠𝕔𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟  :    ship dock .

𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐀 𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐄𝐄 𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃 stuffed under the ships base, the clang of metal & burning zip of rope a noise that follows along as he moves quickly to free any strain, chip & crack that threaten to dismantle the reputation of his most prized creation. for  this  hour,  it  seemed  the  gods  had  other  plans, what  with  the  spitfire  energy  that  motivated  him  to  abandon  any  other projects to tend to his ship — ceased by the creature that flies beak first into the sail, an echoing rip as it attempts to free itself. ❛ hijo de gran puta, ❜ he grits out, a sigh of frustration as hears someone walk near. ❛ mind passing me that, ❜ he juts his chin in the direction of the ladder; the english verbiage for it slipping his mind; quick temper hoping they can clue in on what he's asking for.

[nothingbettertodotoday]

Xavier Thorpe x reader (y/n)

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4

Word count: 1744 Warnings; underage drinking, drugs, smoking Author notes: once again thank you for all the love on part 1&2, both have just passed 200 notes<3 i wrote part 3 at 2am last night so sorry for any mistakes! drop me a message for any ideas! Summary: You are a poltergeist with the powers of invisibility (cloaking), levitation and pyrotechnics. You build a close friendship and spend the evening in his dorm to avoid the rain. The morning after you attend classes.

______________________________________________________________

The conservatory was warm and humid, not unusual. Miss Thornhill had the largest collection of deadly plants that you could find in the state, even if the plants were deadly it always smelt fresh, the air made it feel so easy to breathe. 

You headed towards your regular seat, next to Divina, however you noticed it was occupied by the one and only Bianca. You paused for a second, trying to figure out why your regular partner hadn’t saved you the seat, you then remembered what Xavier had told you just the night before. They had broken up. No wonder she had moved seats. Your eyes scanned the class, looking for an empty chair, the full class meant unfortunately there was just one spot left, at the very back of the class, next to Xavier. You dropped your bag down and pulled a seat up next to Xavier, you tried to ignore his smirk as you got out your uncompleted homework, you glanced at Xavier’s worksheet sitting next to you and started copying down a few answers. Xavier caught wind of what you were doing and pushed the pages over to you. You looked up at him, eyes meeting for just a split second, it was enough to send heat to your cheeks, the colour must be obvious to Xavier who was still looking at you.

The class was fairly simple, especially sitting next to one of the smartest students, Xavier didn’t show it often but his competitive nature made it easy for him to excel in his studies. You were dissecting a plant together, discussing the events of the night before, until you noticed a pair of shady blue eyes were piercing into you, Bianca. She scoffed and quickly looked away from the two of you.

Miss Thornhill ended the class, you started to gather your belongings, stuffing your books and pencil case into your bag. Xavier piped up “So a few of us are having a bit of a get together this evening, Bianca is going to be there, I was just wondering, do you want to tag along?”.

“Wow, Thorpe, is that how you ask me on a date? Even after spending the night with a girl?” you winked and started to walk out the class. 

Xavier rushed towards the door, struggling to keep up with you. You had a free period so headed to the quad, Xavier followed you out.

“Come on y/n, it would be great to have you there, it’ll be a laugh” Xavier pleaded. 

“What's it going to take to stop you nagging?” You sat on the edge of the fountain and looked up at Xavier, he smiled down at you.

“You coming with me tonight,” he replied.

“Fine, what time?”

“I’ll meet you outside your dorm at 8pm”, Xavier said, “Anyway you're making me late for class, see you tonight, wear something cute.” Xavier half shouted as he jogged away to his class.

The day went by quickly, your free period was followed by lunch, Latin (a few smirks from Ajax were definitely noted) and then an hour of fencing, before you knew it you were back in your dorm getting ready for the party. You turned your speakers up as loud as they would go as you sat on the floor in front of your mirror getting your makeup ready, you used much more makeup than you usually would, darkening your eyes, adding black eyeliner across your lids, and a slight shimmer to highlight. You chose to wear a pair of black ripped skinny jeans with a low cut strappy top, they perfectly matched your platform boots. You filled up an empty bottle with vodka to take to the party with you, it was nearing 8pm so you decided to head out.

Xavier was already there as you reached your meeting point, he had a few layers on, his iconic grey coat, a hoodie and a shirt paired with some jeans, you had to admit he looked very handsome. “You look amazing” Xavier greeted you with.

“Not too shabby yourself Thorpe.” you responded. 

Xavier draped his arm over your shoulder, just like the night before, as he directed you to the location of the party. Your surroundings were familiar, but rather than heading to any of the dorms like you expected you were walking across the quad, towards the Edgar Allan Poe Statue, you looked up at Xavier confused.

“Right, I probably should explain, there's this secret club, called the Nightshades, it's kind of a legacies only thing but I did some digging and you should be one of us”

“One of us, what do you mean?” you laughed at the idea.

“Well your mother was a part of the group, i'll show you later. Just take the pledge with us and you're in.”.

“God, Xav, sounds like you're making me join a cult.”, you laughed it off, but was secretly excited to see what was next. 

Xavier snapped his fingers twice outside the statue, and suddenly a doorway opened up. You thought it looked familiar, it did. You recognised the room behind from Xaviers drawing, a spiral staircase leading down to a library, the only difference that tonight the library was filled with students drinking and partying, the lights were low, but not dark enough you couldn't see, you glanced around at all the familiar faces there, Ajax, Kent, Bianca, Divina, Yoko and Rowan, as well as a few other students you had just occasionally seen around. Xaviers arm had dropped from your shoulders but now was sitting on your lower back, he guided you into the party. 

Yoko was the first to greet you both, handing over a drink to each of you, you took a sip and almost spat it back out, you could easily guess Yoko had gone a little crazy on the spirit. Yoko grabbed your hand and pulled you away, you looked back at Xavier as he was greeted by Ajax. You had a few friends like Ajax and Divina who you saw in classes, but this was really out of your comfort zone. 

Yoko took you over to a table of shots, where she, yourself and Divina had a few each, they both started to playfully interrogate you about Xavier, asking why you were suddenly sitting together, why did he bring you, and any other question about the non-existent relationship. 

You studied your peers at the party, deciding who to approach next, your eyes unknowingly searched for Xavier but you couldn't seem to find him, you settled on Ajax and Kent in the corner, they were both sitting on beanbags, clouds of smoke surrounding them. 

“y/n!” Ajax cheered as you approached, his eyes were glossy and speech slurred, Gorgon's had a stereotype of being stoners and Ajax was the living embodiment of that. You flopped onto the bean bag with them, taking a drag from the cigarette Ajax had offered you.

“Have either of you seen Xav?” you asked,

“Looking for lover boy are we?” Ajax said, sending himself and Kent into a fit of laughter, you pushed Ajax who fell off the beanbag, creating more laughs from yourself and Kent. 

You looked around again checking for Xavier, you found it weird he insisted you come to this party and was suddenly nowhere to be found, your eyes fell to the stairs where you had entered, you finally clocked Xavier, with Bianca. They were both smiling at each other.

“Let's play some games!” Yoko shouted and slurred, the group gathered into a circle, someone had suggested spin the bottle, as much as you protested you were forced down by the girls next to you, Yoko on one side and Divina on the other.

The bottle had already spun 4 times before it was your turn, at this point almost everyone had kissed, Yoko and Bianca, Bianca and Ajax, Rowan and Xavier, Kent and Yoko, the only odd ones left were you and Divina. It was your turn, you spun the bottle, you had already had too many drinks to even focus on who you wanted, you were just mesmerised by the bottle spinning. The crown erupted in cheers, it had landed on Divina, you turned to face each other both giggling, Divina put both her hands on your cheeks and pulled you in, you shared what you could only imagine was a very passionate kiss, and broke apart laughing. Divina and a few others went on for a few turns while you made yourself another drink, you didn't even know what you were mixing but it tasted delicious. 

Xavier snuck up behind you, grabbing your waist, you almost screamed and spilt some of your drink. “Come outside with me for a minute” Xavier whispered in your ear, he grabbed your hand and pulled you up the stairs, you were out on the quad and even with the amount you had drank you felt absolutely freezing as you stepped out. 

Xavier instantly noticed you pull your arms in closer, trying to keep your body warm, he took off his hoodie and put it over your shoulders, the smell instantly brought you back to the night before, reminding you of Xaviers warm, soft, bedsheets. 

“What are we doing out here Xavi”, you mumbled, “I was having fun” you dragged out your sentence. 

“I just needed to do something before I have one too many drinks and forget to”, Xavier cupped your cheek, the warmth from his hand made you want to melt into him, his other hand grabbed your waist and pulled you closer. Butterflies. Your stomach felt like a whole swarm had been released, Xavier used his hand to gently make you face him, he bent down and matched his lips to yours. Tingles passed through your whole body, you slowly started to levitate matching Xaviers height, both of his hands now sat on your waist pulling you closer. Xaviers tongue brushed against your lower lip, you opened your mouth slightly to allow him access, you moaned slightly, which made Xavier pull back. You lowered yourself to the ground and looked back up at him, he went in for another kiss but this time you gently bit his bottom lip, Xavier released a moan that was unexpected. 

“I needed our first kiss to be on our terms, not because of some stupid game,” Xavier whispered in your ear, “come on, lets get back inside before anyone notices.”.

[that-fandom-sucks-tho]

Ben Cardy: The Cardboard Man; The Cardboard Myth; The Cardboard Legend; The Cardboard Wing Man?

A/N: Okay so like again I haven’t wrote in a while and I really should be writing the Young Justice wip but like I saw that video and I’d already had this idea for weeks and it felt like it  was a sign that it needed to be posted cause it fit so perfectly. 

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader and Joe Mazzello x sister!Reader

Masterlist

You walked into the kitchen still clearing the sleep from your weary eyes trying to wake up for the eight hour shift that you had ahead of you. What you expected to be staring back at you in your kitchen was a bowl of fruit, maybe a left over bowl, not a pair of green eyes attached to a very handsome face.

“Ahhhhhh!!!” You screamed at the top of your lungs.

A thud and then sudden footsteps alerted you to the fact that your goofus brother had heard your terror and was rushing in to save you.

He slid around the corner with what appeared to be an Adidas tennis shoe clutched in his hands ready to be swung at your assailant.

“Huh, whats it. What’s wrong?” Joe groggily mumbled as he too tried to wipe sleep out of his eyes.

You scoffed, “Well, I’m glad to know that if I was in any actual danger I could count on you to... shoe the attackers?”

Joe looked at the ‘weapon’ in his hand and sheepishly lowered it. “Hey, at least I came. You still didn’t answer me; what’s wrong?”

“What the heck is that?” You pointed at the cardboard man currently sitting at your kitchen counter. Joe looked in the direction and started to laugh.

“Y/N, that’s Ben Cardy.” He stated like it was obvious.

“Yeah, gonna need way more context. Who even is that?”

“Fine. That’s a cardboard cut out of Ben Hardy; who you’ve seen before. I’ve face-timed you tons of times with him. Though he did usually have his Roger gear on. We got it for when he couldn’t do the press tour with us.” You blushed at the mention of Ben Hardy. You had seen him before; you hadn’t realized what he looked like when not having the 70′s getup.

“I’m not used to him looking so....” You trailed off finally taking in a good look at the suited up smoldering man seated at your kitchen counter.

A snap brought you out of your trance. You looked up at Joe who had a smug look on his face.

“So? Y/N do find this cardboard attractive? Should I be worried? Carboardphillia?” He joked and barely dodged the punch to the chest you had aimed in his direction.

“You know what I mean. And why did you feel the need to bring him into our house and most importantly seat him at the counter? The tour is over you can throw this out now.”

Joe gasped in mock horror clutching his chest. He walked over and put his hand over ‘Ben Cardy’s’ ears. “Don’t listen to her I’d never do that to you,” He whispered to the cutout before looking back up at you, “And besides I’ve got so many bit ideas for him I can’t just waste this opportunity.”

You rolled your eyes and walked away to get dressed deciding a stale muffin at work was better than whatever nonsense was happening here.

The next morning, having forgotten about the prior events, caused another shock at the sight in your kitchen. Your heart racing but this time no actual screaming. Sighing you grabbed your favorite cereal and sat down across from ‘Ben Cardy’.

You slurping disturbed the silence as you stared at the printed image on cardboard. It was clearly from some sort of red-carpet something. It was also a high quality image. You could see the seams in his suit, the strands of his silky blonde hair, even the flecks inside his very green eyes.

“No matter how much you eye fuck him his clothes are printed on they’re not going to come off.” Joe smirked as he walked into the kitchen to pour himself a cup of coffee.

You jerked your eyes away jostling your spoon causing milk to spill on the counter. You glared at your brother.

“I am not ‘eye fucking’ him. Just examining him.” You explained though the strain in your voice was not convincing Joe.

“Sure, and if your examination causes drooling it’s all in the name of science?” He questioned leaning backing stirring the creamer in his coffee.

Your mistake was actually checking to see if you had been drooling.

“Ha! I knew it! You do like him. You know we are friends I can introduce you to him. I think you two would actually really get along.”

“No please don’t do that. That’s so embarrassing. Like ‘Hey date my pathetic sister who needs her older brother to set her up.’” 

“That is not at all how it would go; besides Ben alr-” Her started.

“Plus he’s like your best friend so that would be weird and I’m what, nine years younger than him? He would for sure see me as your baby sister. No way would he like me, so please just don’t.” You pleaded as you walked out to get ready.

Joe smirked noting that your arguments included everything but you not actually  liking Ben. Oh, this was going to be fun. He was already on his phone making a call. 

“Hey mate....”

The next day you drug yourself out of bed to start your morning routine. This time though you had been expecting a pair of eyes to greet you back. You were trying not to look at him in case Joe walked in but out of the corner of your eye you saw a new pop of color.

It was a pink post-it note in the shape of a speech bubble stuck to ‘Ben Cardy’s’ face. Your eyebrows furrowed as you made your way over trying to read the writing.

Ben told me he thinks you’re really pretty.

You laughed and blushed at the note. Clearly Joe was trying to mess with you but it flattered you anyways. Looking around to see if Joe was watching you grabbed the post-it and shoved into your pocket. The small smile still present.

Joe walked in after you left with a triumphant grin on his face. He grabbed his phone out of his pocket and answered the very urgent text from a very curious Brit.

For the next week every morning ‘Ben Cardy’ had a new message attached to him. Supposedly from the real Ben but you knew better. Joe was just trying to make you laugh and nothing more. But still...

Day 2

Your laugh makes his heart soar

Day 3

He hung out in Joe’s trailer just hoping you’d face-time

Day 4

He thinks you’re so smart and admires how hard you work in college

Day 5

Says you’re way funnier than Joe but don’t tell him that

Day 6

He can’t stop thinking about you or how you’d feel pressed against him

Day 7

He give anything for a chance with you

By the end of the week you had no idea how you felt. On one hand you had kept all of the notes in hopes that they were true but on the other there was no way that he wrote those or even said them. What did Joe write down these notes at the behest of Ben? There is no way Joe would write the sixth one without throwing up. I mean you were his baby sister. (He had gagged a few times but apparently the whole thing needed to be written or it ‘wouldn’t work’. Plus he promised himself he’d get payback.)

You and Joe had not talked about it. He didn’t bring it up and you were too scared to ask; what if Joe was just messing with you. Ignorance was bliss in this moment.

You were sitting pondering the thoughts swirling in your head when Joe stormed in a giant grin on his face.

“Guess who’s coming to visit for a bit involving the ever beautiful and talkative,” Joe winks at you before continuing, ““Ben Cardy.’“

“Who?” You mumbled still trying to decipher the ‘talkative’ part of his intro.

“Ben Hardy.”

You choked on your popcorn.

“He’s what?!” You exclaimed trying to wipe the remnant of half chewed soggy popcorn off your chin.

“Yeah, he was in town and wanted to meet up and I wanted a sequel to the “Night of Regrets’ video with Cardy but ampped up. So he’ll be here in like an hour.”

“An hour,” You squeaked.

“Yeah and since it’s the weekend and you’re not at work I thought you two could finally officially meet. Plus you could help us shoot.” His eyes twinkled with a mischief that did not sit well with you.

You jumped up leaving your snack for a much more important task.

“Where are you going?”

“To definitely not put on make up and a cute outfit,” You yelled.

The hour crawled by and you were sitting in the living room trying to act casual. You were doing well, except for the near vibration of your legs due to nerves.

“Hey Kid Flash, calm down or you might get stuck in the speed force.” Joe laughed as he sat down next to you. His hand clamped down on your leg making you follow his order.

“First of all, too soon for that reference-”

“It’s been six years!”

You glared. “Second of all I’m not nervous I’m just trying out this new fad exercise.”

He nodded his head in an uh-huh-totally-believe-you way.

A knock on the door stopped you from responding and you swear you stopped breathing. You may have froze as well.

Joe looked and shook his head. “Try to be a normal human, maybe.”

He walked over and opened the door and there he was: Ben Hardy, in the flesh. Which you can say was new for you. His eyes were the same color as the cutout and his hair looked just as silky. Though he now had on a bright smile that made your heart flutter into your throat. While he wasn’t in a suit the soft grey t-shit and blue jeans was just as attractive.

“Hey buddy how have you been? Is America treating you well?” The boys did a bro hug that kinda morphed into a full blown hug.

“Yeah, I’ve been having a great time but I expect this will be the best part of my trip.” Ben laughed before looking over Joe’s shoulder and directly into your eyes.

“Ah, yes Ben this is my little sister Y/N. Y/N this is Ben.”

“Oh, I know who she is.” He took a strong three strides in your direction. You quickly scrambled up to meet him half-way and shake his hand.

You gave a nervous laugh before answering.” Yeah, I guess six plus months of quasi-face-timing counts as meeting.”

He grabbed your hand, eyes never parting from yours and you felt goosebumps crawl up your arm and down your spine causing you to shiver. He held you hand long after the appropriate ‘handshake’ time allotted.

Joe cleared his throat.

“Alright lets get this going and then maybe go out for some food or something?” Joe offered before motioning towards the bedrooms. Grabbing ‘Ben Cardy’ as he walked past.

“Oh Y/N we’re going to use your room if that’s cool. You have white bed sheets and that adds a bit of continuity to this.” Joe dismissively said as he took joy in your panicked expression.

“Um...” You started but it was already too late he had barged into your room.

You gasped as you remembered the pile of post-its you had on your dresser. Yeah, that was a problem.

You rushed in pushing past both men and quickly stuffed the post-its into a drawer. Slamming it shut you turned around noticing the quizzical looks from the blonde and your brother.

“Um, it was- was my bra--” You stammered out before a heated patchy blush crawled up your neck and slapped itself onto your face. Joe’s eyebrows had breached his hairline and Ben let out a tinkle of a laugh and you suddenly felt like the floor needed to open up and swallow you.

“Okay, well anything else or can we start this?” Joe said but didn’t wait for the answer as he ventured further into your room and climbed on your bed.

He flipped back the covers and slid in the cardboard man positioning it so his head was on the pillow. He then shimmied himself under the covers and then waved Ben over. His attention was brought back to the cardboard as the shifting covers moved it out of place.

Ben walked past but not before whispering “Not how I’d expected getting into your bed.”

You choked on a gasp watching as the man who gave it to you smirked and climbed under your covers. His arms were crossed behind his head his biceps flexing (for no obvious reason besides being tantalizing). His shirt sleeve slipped down his arm showing his tattoo. He licked his lips and ran a hand through his hair trying to make it look messier. You made an almost cartoonish gulp at the sight.

The boys ran through the first run with Joe ‘waking up’ before noticing ‘Ben Cardy’. He ad libbed for a bit before turning over to Ben. They ran through a few lines and then the part you helped came in. You were supposed to hold the camera when they flourished the covers over their heads. It was successful but Ben insisted on another take saying he wanted to try again on his part. You were trying to hold in your cackles, so you had no idea what Ben was talking about.

“Oh you’ve got to be kidding me.” Joe mutters in annoyance.

“Hey buddy.” Ben softly answered.

“Hi. Uhh,you good?” 

“Yeah, great.” 

“Good. Have you met, um--”

“Yeah, we uh, we met, I was trying really hard to tell this girl I liked her and he delivered some messages for me. So we’re pretty tight.” He was looking at you now and your eyes had widened in shock.

“You wrote those notes for me? Joe wasn’t fucking with me?” You asked in shock.

“Gosh no. Half of them made me want to carve my eyes out.” Joe responded in a mock annoyed tone.

Ben had climbed out of your bed and slowly made his way over to you. 

“No, I meant every one of those.”

“All of them?”

“Especially the sixth one.” 

Joe groaned and threw a pillow at Ben. “Still my baby sister.”

“Oi! Professing my feelings here. If you wouldn’t mind,” Ben yelled before turning back, “If you’d give me a chance I’d love to take you out while I’m still here.”

His nervous expectant eyes stared into yours and a smile broke out onto your face.

“Of course.”

He grinned a breath taking grin and leaned down pulling your face in for a sweet passionate kiss. You looped your hand around your neck twisting your fingers in his hair as he dipped you lower to deepen the kiss.

Suddenly water splashed over you and Ben making you shoot apart sputtering.

Joe stood there with a now empty pail and a triumphant grin.

“That’s payback for making me write six, saying I’m not funny and ‘snogging’,” Joe put up quotes and said the last word in his imitation Ben voice,” my sweet innocent baby sister in front of me. Oh and I heard that earlier comment about the bed.”

“JOE!” You yelled.

“What? I’m protecting your honor; now, you two crazy kids dry off and go have dinner. Be back by ten or the only Ben the world will hear from is the cardboard kind.” His thinly veiled threat sat in the air as he walked out.

“Well we better hurry its already eight.” Ben said looking down at his watch. 

Strands of his hair were plastered to his forehead and hanging over his eyes. You nodded and stepped closer to leaned against him as you pushed the off his face. 

“Yeah, we better hurry.” You whispered as you looked up at him and looped your hands behind his head once again. 

He lowered his head and his lips ghosted against your own. One hand cupped your cheek and the other your waste as he pulled you impossibly closer. Finally you closed the distance and moved your lips together. It was slow and sensual and you melted into it. Your finger pulled at his hair causing a groan to be elicited from the back of his throat. 

“We have more water in this house!”

[ridleymocki]

Screaming for What Was to Come, Now I'm Longing for the Way I Was

Written for Pynch Week 17 Day 4, prompt:  Social media // College // Fake dating.

Summary: Adam had always known what he wanted: to get out of this damn town, dust trails in his rear view. But he never counted on the events of the last year that had made him tied to this place, and he'd never expected Ronan. So when Ronan discovers that Adam's been hiding his college acceptance letters from him, Adam has some explaining to do.Featuring Opal as the most bizarre and unapologetic ice-breaker.

Notes: This one was super fun, I'm so intrigued by the way Maggie's characters would react when tested emotionally, especially in anger or hurt, so I hope I depicted it fairly accurately. UMMM there is a spider metaphor: it's a cute metaphor, but there's description of a very big spider so beware, if you don't like them. Regarding italics: restraint? What restraint? Title is from 'Don't Save Me' by HAIM. Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoy it! <3

also on ao3

“Parrish! Fuck sake!”

 Adam grinned at the floor, grabbing his phone from the dresser and heading downstairs. Ronan was waiting for him outside. It was date night – Jesus Adam, we’re not fucking forty – which meant he and Ronan were going for pizzas and driving around the town, and very probably pulling over to the side of the road to make out, before coming back to the Barns in the early hours of the morning tired and happy. It’d become an accidental habit, but a good one.

 He stepped out of the house and saw Chainsaw circling overhead, the sky nearly pink in the dwindling light. They’d agreed to take Adam’s car instead of the BMW, and by agreed he meant that he’d bitched Ronan out about wanting to race every time they went out and it got solved by them taking the ‘shitbox’ so that Ronan wouldn’t even be tempted. Adam walked around to the side of the house and saw Ronan’s head in the passenger seat through his back window.

 Twirling his keys around a finger Adam got into the car and said, “So impatient for date night, Lynch, you have to holler at me?” He’d been too busy watching the sky that he only really looked at Ronan when he got no response. Not a snort nor a slap to the arm, nothing.

 Ronan was staring at his lap, where his hands tightly held several pieces of paper. The glove box in front of him was hanging wide open and envelopes were spilling on the floor. Adam felt his heart drop into his stomach. “Shit,” he said, and clenched his fingers around the wheel.

“Princeton. Harvard. Yale.” Ronan listed the first three he held and flipped through the others. “Adam what the fuck is this.”

 “I got in,” he said, voice flat. He couldn’t look at him. Feeling the fear of a disowning look and cutting words like a cold hand down his spine.

 “I can see that.” Ronan flipped through the pages again. Adam swallowed, hard.

 Panic slipped down his throat and in a second he’d ripped his key from the ignition and got out of the car, barely keeping himself from breaking into a run, and made a hasty and humiliating retreat back into the house. Chainsaw screeched overhead.

 Ronan followed him with a slam of the car door. Because of course he did.

 “Shit.” Adam stared out the living room window and pulled at his hair fretfully, trying to gather his thoughts, trying to gather some sort of explanation. It didn’t have to be accurate, it just had to be good enough to not break things further. But he huffed at himself, because Ronan was an asshole but he always told the truth and it made Adam feel like he owed him the same. Dammit.

 He heard Ronan step carefully into the room, and it was worse than if he’d come barging in.

 “Why didn’t you say anything?”

 Adam turned around to face him. “I was going to. I just– I couldn’t, not yet.”

 “Why not?” Ronan bit. “I know you’re going to college. I’m not a fucking flower. You don’t have to tiptoe around me.”

 “Shit! No! That wasn’t it.” Adam stepped closer. “Have I ever treated you like that, ever?”

 “Then what is it? I was waiting for these to come,” Ronan slapped the letters in his hand down onto the side table. “I was waiting to congratulate you! And do dumb shit like call the others and throw a fucking party. I was looking forward to supporting my boyfriend on some of the biggest news of his life, and now I find out you didn’t even tell me? What the fuck.”

 “I was angry!” Adam said, frustrated. Jesus he felt like shit. That was… that was a lot. Ronan didn’t talk like that, ever. He saw Ronan’s face close off and quickly amended: “Not at you, idiot. At me. At myself. I was angry at myself and frustrated as hell and I couldn’t tell you or the others and have them be excited when I couldn’t join you.”

 Ronan stilled, confusion passing over his face. He didn’t exactly look like he relaxed so much as his anxiety shifted to focus on Adam. “You got into the top ivy league schools, Parrish, what the hell?”

 Adam ran a hand through his hair. “Exactly! I worked my ass off – for years – to get this. I wanted to get out of this bullshit town and never look at it again. And instead, I opened those letters and – and I was happy, for sure, I was satisfied or something – but I was also just… sad.”

 Ronan’s eyebrows flew upwards. It was about as openly expressive as his face got and it looked absolutely ridiculous on him. “Sad,” he said flatly. And Adam got it, really, the fact that he was being stupid, but. But.

 “I don’t want to leave.” It came out choked. He cast his eyes over the room, the living room of Ronan’s home. There was the couch where he first traced Ronan’s tattoo. The rug they’d all sprawled across and laughed together the night of Ronan’s birthday. Through the doorway Adam could see the table where he ate cereal with Opal nearly every day in comfortable silence. And in the corner was the piano he’d pushed Ronan against last night, taking him apart with his mouth and the hands Ronan loved so much.

 When his eyes finally returned to Ronan, he found his shoulders were still tense but his expression was soft, the uncommon way when he was too surprised to paste over it with a scowl. Ronan visibly swallowed. “When did that happen?”

 Adam bit his lip. “Bit by bit, I think. I’m not actually sure if I stopped wanting to run away, or if I just ran here.” There was something about the Barns that undid the knots in Adam’s shoulders, he felt it as he drove over the ridge and caught the first glimpse of the wild grasses. Gansey had once called it fairyland, offhandedly. It felt that way; somehow removed, liminal.

 The others loved this place, too. But there was a reason that Adam kept coming back, that this place had sunk into his bones and cradled him, and that reason was standing in front of him, frowning like he didn’t know what to do.

 “You have to go, Adam. You can’t not go.” It was gratifying, in a way that made him feel a little guilty, that the words were obviously difficult for Ronan to say. He didn’t want him to leave, either.

 “Of course I do, I know that. And I want to. Go to college, the whole nine yards. Doesn’t mean I want to leave here, though.”

 Ronan crossed his arms. “You’re making it sound so final.” His voice was hard. “Is it?”

 “No,” Adam said immediately. Ronan gave him a look like he didn’t believe him. “Idiot,” Adam grumbled, and walked the five steps between them in a heartbeat. He leant over the wall Ronan’s arms put between them and kissed him.

 Adam had seen a nature documentary once where the researcher – who was a crazy person as far as Adam could tell – tried to coax a bird eating spider out of its hole in the Amazon rainforest so they could look at it. But every time they came close, it spooked and scuttled back into its dark hovel. No matter how softly they approached it, it didn’t feel safe in the light.

 Sometimes, when Ronan got like this, careful and shut down, he reminded Adam of that damned spider; forced to be observed when he didn’t want to be, itching to flee no matter how fearsome he looked. But he was only scared, and Adam was the crazy idiot who just had to be patient. So he kissed him firmly, and raised a hand to splay across the base of Ronan’s skull.

 When Ronan leaned the slightest bit into him, Adam knew he’d won. He untied Ronan’s arms, grabbing his hand and drawing it to his own waist, and in a second Ronan was pulling him close. Adam felt Ronan’s fear leak into the kiss like Ronan wanted him to feel it, to realise it, and at the same time that Adam felt terribly guilty for scaring him like that, he was also amused. Because this is what they were, the hopeless boys who paid each other back for their meanness with elbows to ribs and punches to arms and kisses that stung.

 He smiled into the kiss, and Ronan pulled back from him. “Smug bastard.”

 Adam grinned at him, rubbing his hands over Ronan’s shoulders and down his chest. “It’s not my fault you’re so easy, Lynch.”

 Ronan growled and kissed him again.

 They parted long enough for Adam to say against his lips, “I’m going to go to college. And I’m going to come back here. As often as I’m able. Just you wait, I’ll be graduating before you know it.”

 “You say that like I’m not gonna dream up a way to see you more often.”

 “If you used your damn phone we’d technically be able to see each other all the time.”

 “Gross. I’m not Skyping my boyfriend, Parrish. I have a reputation.”

 Adam snorted. “Yeah, sure. I give it a week.”

 “Asshole,” Ronan said into his cheek, and started nibbling at his ear.

 Adam was gasping and ready to suggest they move this upstairs when the back door slammed open, letting in a gust of sweet summer air. Opal appeared in the doorway and trudged through the living room with what could have been a growl or a purr, depends, rising in her throat. Behind her she dragged a pluming tree branch twice the length of her own body, pulling it through the adjoining door into the kitchen without sparing the two of them a glance.

 “What the fuck is she doing now?” Ronan sighed, thumbing Adam’s hip.

 “Should we check?” Adam already knew the answer, but damn, her goddamn timing.

 “Probably,” and Ronan pulled him by the hand into the kitchen, where immediately around the corner they had to hop over the leafy mass of the branch.

 Opal was sitting at the table with a circlet of leaves on her head and dirt smeared on her cheeks and arms, hoofed feet swinging.

 “What, destroying the tree wasn’t enough? You had to drag it in here and mess up the house, too?” Ronan kicked at the leaves. Opal stuck her tongue out at him, petulant and ridiculous, and Adam smiled at her from over Ronan’s shoulder. She caught his smile and Ronan slapped him in the stomach. “Don’t encourage her.” Adam laughed at him.

 Without further prompting Opal leaned precariously out of her chair to reach the leaves closest to her, and drew back with her small palms full of even smaller bright orange fruit. Apricots. Adam looked at the branch again, and sure enough, under the green he could catch the blush colour of lots of tiny apricots. Opal threw one at Ronan and, surprisingly, he caught it in mid-air before it could hit his face. Adam raised his eyebrows at him. “Oh, shut up.”

 Adam reached down and grabbed an apricot from the branch. “Are these real fruit or dream fruit?”

 “Fuck knows,” Ronan said, “Can never be sure what dad put on these grounds, but I’m pretty sure they’re not mine. They’re Schrodinger’s apricots.”

 “That’s not–“ Adam caught the smirk curling Ronan’s lip as he bit into an apricot. “Yes,” Adam said flatly, “they’re Schrodinger’s apricots. That’s exactly how that experiment went.”

 Ronan snorted unattractively at him and Adam split his apricot open with his thumbs more than a little viciously, because it wasn’t unattractive at all. But it should have been, dammit.

 Opal watched as they both ate – the sweetness of the fruit making their eyes close, the occasional tartness bursting over their tongues – and looked pleased in the quiet, sharp way she had.

 “Take a basket out to the tree, next time,” Ronan groused.

 The last storm, the lightning did it, Opal said.

 You could still take a basket to the branch. Ronan replied, his Latin easy as always.

 It didn’t annoy Adam like it used to, to think that Ronan was better at it than him. Adam couldn’t pull things out of his dreams, either. It was good that they were different, and accepting it meant Adam got to appreciate Ronan’s talents. Thoroughly appreciate them. There were some things in Latin Ronan had only ever said in the newborn hours of the morning, against too warm skin and with his voice strained. Adam wouldn’t have been able to have that if he were still worried about comparing the two of them to each other.

 Opal threw another apricot at Ronan’s scowling face and Adam laughed. They were like siblings. Blue joked that Ronan was a stay-at-home dad these days, and in a way Opal was his – he had brought her to the world from his dreams, after all. But Opal wasn’t a child. Whatever time they’d spent protecting her she had returned in aiding them, being a guide, and there was an eeriness to her that could be off-putting, but which Adam was always drawn to. It was like she could see all the time that had ever been, and all the time that would ever be, all at once.

 The three of them were all the outsider things, the weird ones, creatures. Opal had hoofed satyr legs and was a native Latin speaker. Adam was metaphysically connected to a magical forest which once manifested a thorn in mid-air just to freak out his father. Ronan would alternately wake up with scratches on his arms that weren’t of the fun variety, or with a happy swarm of lightning bugs above his head. Everyone had baggage.

 They were in a house full of dream things on land populated by impossible animals. Some nights, when Ronan’s breath was very quiet and the air was sticky with heat, Adam would go onto the back porch and watch the grass move in the moonlight, and feel like nothing outside of this place was real.

 He knew, as he put on a pot of coffee and watched the other two growl at each other, that his earlier conversation with Ronan wasn’t over yet. He hadn’t explained well. It wasn’t just about the Barns, or about Ronan. He’d miss both, more than he wanted to think about, but it wasn’t going to be a permanent separation.

 He was sad because here he felt decidedly Other, the seer of the forest, the Magician. He pushed his otherness to the point of deep, trembling pride, built himself around the idea that he could never go back.

 The letters Ronan had found in his glove box weren’t just inviting him to college, they were summoning him back to normalcy. Back to the mundane. There was no 300 Fox Way at Princeton. No magical lightning bugs, or mythical girls who dragged half an apricot tree into people’s homes. There would be no white elk, or margarita night with women who insisted they weren’t witches, or laughing afternoon sex in a room above a church.

 And maybe, there could be no Magician.

 Adam hadn’t expected to know who he was in a way that so depended on Henrietta, hadn’t expected to build anything about himself other than the constant survive, survive, survive, and the exhaustion that he resented. But being Cabeswater’s eyes had made him someone, being loved by Ronan had made him someone, having sat in a room of people that would hug him and look at him with affection had made him someone. And he wasn’t sure he was ready to leave and go be somewhere where he was no one, again.

 He always thought he’d go to college to make something of himself, but now he feared he’d be remade, and knew he didn’t want to be.

 Coffee cups in hand, Adam stepped carefully over the branches and set a cup in front of Ronan where he sat at the table. Ronan swiftly leant in and nipped Adam’s wrist as he withdrew, and Adam’s heart swooped and swayed. He didn’t want to miss this.

 On the table, Opal had created a grim little pile of the stones from the apricots she’s eaten, and it sat there looking like a pyramid without its uppermost point. As he sat down, Adam drew the stone from the fruit he’d had earlier from his pocket and placed it on top.

 Opal smiled up at him, sharp teeth and all.

 “You still wanna go out?” Ronan asked him. Adam looked at him for a long second, checking in with his own body. He was tired, tired and unsure.

 “Nah,” he said, “I feel like I need a damn nap.” Ronan smirked at him, but his eyes were warm, and he just nodded.

 They sat drinking coffee in the orange light through the window, silent until the sun dipped behind the hills and they would need to turn on some lights. Under the table, Ronan put his hand on Adam’s knee, and quieted the fear in him that the future would change things.

 People change the places, Opal muttered. Adam looked at her in surprise. She nodded once, like she was satisfied with her statement, and reached into the leaves to pick another apricot.

 People change the places. Not the other way around.

 He brought his hand down on top of Ronan’s, passed his thumb over his bones. Adam certainly hoped so.