#third off im fine as hell rich as fuck and as you can see im getting dick on the regular

[firelise]

I"M HAVING A TIME

Tongrak THEE Stallion

[glassedplanets]

OKAY TATTOO AU BECAUSE NOW IM INVESTED, DAMN IT:

please tell me if ASL has some kind of matching something somewhere. tell me everything about ace, you know i love him. and law of course. is cora okay. where's doflamingo in all this.

OKAY THIS IS GOING TO BE LONG.

Ace Survives because we said so and this is for giggles and good feelings

he does extreme sports and jets around the world with yamato to Fuck Around And Find Out, stops by to visit luffy every so often

(this is how The Incident happens; he's in town for some kind of extreme sports Event and of course invites luffy, law's dragged along for the ride, it becomes so much more than anyone bargains for) (but this time the other straw hats are able to be there for luffy maybe only two hours late instead of two years)

but ASL do have a matching something!! it starts w/ luffy absently doodling something on his thigh with a pen one day, thinking about his childhood, and then he bolts into the shop (which is closed by this point), rings up his brothers to shoot the shit, and at one point one of them is like, hey, i hear your machine, thought you were closed? someone run late? but luffy's like :D nah i drew something that made me think of you both so i'm tattooing it on myself. (sabo: BRO WHAT. ace: YOOOO SICK AS HELL 🔥) this becomes a Repeat Process by way of asking sabo (and then ace) to tell him a story from their childhood and then luffy creates something out of that. they're all abstract and vague but very obviously echoes of the same shape in ways that reflect each of the three of them. they all cry during this process (but it's fine)

: ) law and cora.

(this is almost entirely giffy's work, hats off to them)

dofy has a bitcoin empire and is also the sleaziest nastiest dealer you have ever met

(in college he sold oregano to rich shitheads)

(kaido runs a food supplement pyramid scheme cult)

law's family is not around due to canon-adjacent events and he ends up at a group home that's actually like a wild tax write off kind of situation for the donquixote family

this is where cora meets him in kind of an advocate capacity? and sees law on the cusp of getting involved in shady shit, and law really doesn't care because he probably won't live

cora's response to this is well, let's work on getting you better and then you can decide whether life is worth living because i promise you it is

and it's a whole process! but law gets better and cora fights for law to get money from the amber lead settlement along with what his family had left him

i don't think we ended up working out how, exactly, cora dies, just that he does; cora leaves a ton of money to law because anything he can take out of dofy's hands is better than nothing, and god knows law deserves it

so law has, like, Schmoney. what he chooses to do with this Schmoney is open a third-wave coffee shop in a flagging part of town, hire all his friends, and square away his finances down to the penny so that everyone can live comfortably and his prices are low enough that anyone who passes by can reasonably get themselves something nice

this is a great plan until a guy walks in one day with his phone ringing and answers it with "fuck off, i am not lost"

(thousand sunny is directly across the street.)

law does not ever know a normal day in his life after this moment.

(luffy doesn't give law a tattoo over the heart because law isn't crew, per se, but one day law eventually tells luffy about cora, and luffy takes him all in, his tattoos, his whole Everything, and he gets that Luffy Air about him where he's an unstoppable force, and law ends up with a very small blink-and-you-miss-it heart behind one ear)

and what, pray tell, is the shop called?

[tumblybumbly7]

The one who showed is exactly who danny put on the contact list - jason todd wayne

Couple problems with this... DANNY WAS IN FUCKING TENNESSEE AND JERSEY IS AN HOUR AWAY BY PLANE THE AMOUNT OF EFFORT REQUIRED JUST TO BOOK A TICKET AND GET HERE IS ALREADY TOO MUCH FOR A RANDO TEEN AND THATS NOT EVEN MWNTIONING THE FACT THAT JASON IS SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD!

Though danny supposes if this guy doesn't murder or traffic him for this stunt (rich people did that don't they?) He can try to pull the dead guy solidarity card...

"Hi im here for... daniel fenton?" Jason asked the worker at the desk, trying to keep any suspision out of his voice and remain casual. He didn't know why some random kid from tennessee had put HIM down as an emergency contact but he had to admit he needed a quick break from running the gang and this was too funny to not answer to.

"Yes mr wayne, he's down the hall to the left, do you want to see him or have him brought out?" The receptionist replied

"If you could collect for me that we be great, oh and please call me mr todd, mr wayne was my father." Jason responded,trying to not put enficence on the word was he and bruce had patched things up but he could admit it was hard not to get vindictive every once in a while.

Danny was so fucking cooked, he had figured it would be so easy to put some rich kid that he heard had died as his contact and when the hospital calls some rich asshat on the otger end would assume it was prank and hang up, but NOOOOOOO apparently not only was jason alive, but he was here! He actually showed up!

Danny walked out to the reception area, being led by some nurse towards his inevitble and untimely demise and this fucker had the nerve to look amused when he saw danny looking nervous.

"Thanks so much, i'll make sure he gets home safe! Have a great day" jason said as he and this kid who he was totally interagating the second they walked out the door

"So kid... why the hell was i your emergency contact" jason started the second they got out the hospital doors, fighting to keep amusement (the kid looked nervous off his gourd this was hilarious) and anger (this kid had bandages on his chest, some had shot this kid) out of his voice

"... Listen i didn't think you would actually show up! I thought you were dead so they would call you dad and he would assume its like a prank and hang up and i would be home free or something! Please don't traffic or kill me or something!" Danny said hoping jason would understand

"Huh... you know never have i got an answer tp a question so equel parts amusing and anger inducing at the same time, first off fucking hilarious that you tried a gambit like that and had no second thoughts about it, i respect it, second that fact that you think i would traffic or kill you for something as slight as that tells me you might not have had the best interaction with a rich person in the past, but we'll get to that later, and third how did you end up with bullet wounds kid? The reason you needed an emergency contact was because you were SHOT, were you trafficed and thats why you were shot?" Jason questioned as they walked up to his car he used to drive to the private jet bruce let him borrow.

"Well... well no but its fine i heal fast" danny started answering, jason taking this to mean danny is a meta (which kind of correct but he doesn't know that yet so shhhhhhh) danny continued "some assholes claiming they were cps found me wandering around and happened to catch using..." danny looked at jason and immediatly decided that this conversation was going better than he thought it would... welp fuck it in for a penny in for a pound " caught me using my powers (jason mentally hi fived himself at the admission) and started chasing me and shooting at me and yelling some bullshit about stop we have to teach you how to use your powers it could be dangerous for you and others if you dont know how to use them! Jokes on them! Im already half dead!" Shit danny started half joking half venting at the end there, he got in the car with jason and looked over at him

Jason stared back at him he swallowed the breath he had suddenly found himellf holding and then he spoke "well... despite that... concerning comment im willing to let you stay with me for a bit, you got nothing to worry about kid, my pops is always taking in strays, we'll let you stay with us long enough to get these motherfuckers of your tail" what he didn't tell the kid is that he would let him stay at the manor and then tell everyone there what the kid said and let everyone there smother him out of concern whilst he did some investigating. So much for taking a fucking break!

That was it! Danny officially hated CPS! They were so annoying. How did they even keep finding him?! Hes in the rural area of Tennessee and they keep catching up to him. They had kept pace with him through the past three states (was this really cps?) and kept spouting nonsense about his powers being dangerous and needing to be taught how to use them before he hurts himself or others. Jokes on them, Dannys already dead!

Luckly they only seem to be able to track Phantom and not Fenton but after his spooky self got shot by one of these creeps he ducked into a free health clinic for teens and kids. The only problem is that he has to put down a valid Emergency contact. His parents and friends won't work since they don't exist in this dimension and he didn't know anyone else.

So he put down the name of a random Wayne family member because they are confirmed to be real and he doubted any of them would come if called.

He was wrong.

The only real question is which one did he put down

[g0dspeeed]

Liar, Liar

For @constantzeigarnik

"V unabashedly flirting with Viktor, just laying it on real thick for the ripperdoc, and Viktor just not being prepared for it in the slightest."

“Liar, liar.”

The words came out in a tired sigh with a voice that hopefully sounded as indifferent as V intended.

The pair was laid out on the hood of Panam’s latest wheels, eyes closed, and cold drinks in hand. After helping the Aldecaldo get the ride from a locked storage yard, V had offered to relax beneath the shade of a highway overpass while they waited for the client to arrive. Panam accepted without a second thought. Between the two of them, a break from daily survival in Night City seemed in order.

Supposed to be chill.

Just two friends sippin’ on a dry afternoon.

No worries.

No stress for an hour.

That was before their present conversation, one that V was trying desperately to avoid.

“Yeah, I’m the liar here,” returned Panam. “And Night City is family friendly. At least I’m not the one in denial that my ripperdoc has the hots for me.”

V turned to shoot her friend a dark look. The nomad smirked as the warning fell flat. Despite V’s best efforts, Panam could see right through her: She was absolutely fuckin’ right.

“Think ya’ got it all wrong,” V maintained in a cool tone.

“Oh, do I?”

V cringed.

“Only met the guy one time,” Panam said. “Felt like a third wheel between the two of you eye-fuckin’ each other. Almost walked outta there see what that psychic girl was sellin’.”

A new warmth began stinging V’s cheeks and Panam frowned at her friend’s lack of response.

This was new territory. Seeing V react this way was beyond strange. One of the most capable people Panam had ever met was turning red over a man. Borderline bizarre. Truly, the entire conversation was out of the norm.

“Shit,” muttered Panam. At her best efforts at being soft, she added, “Don’t feel bad, V. The guy’s stacked like a fucking truck.”

At that, V finally let her guard down. She grinned as Panam gently shoved her shoulder.

“There she is. Just let that denial fade away-”

“Fuck off.”

“What the hell are you afraid of?” asked Panam. “Rejection?”

V looked at her energy drink, swiveling the liquid around before relenting.

“I mean, yeah, kinda.”

An eye roll and a heavy groan came from the woman beside her.

“Yeah okay,” said Panam. “Like he’d reject a woman half his age, much less a badass like you. V, I saw it for myself. The guy thinks you’re hot. Caught ‘im lookin’ at your ass. Not only that, he cares, like genuinely cares about you, which says a lot for people like us. Next time you see him, just lay it on thick and be done.”

V scrunched her eyes shut at her friend’s advice. Just talking about openly pursuing Viktor Vector made V’s stomach twist into knots. As much as she was the badass that Panam knew her to be, for V to explore an actual romantic relationship outside of ‘eye-fucking’ and the occasional one-night stand with some rando from Afterlife was not something V was familiar with. Her days were chaotic. Her lifestyle was that of constant motion. Viktor, in all his edginess, was stable, consistent, and secure. Also, she enjoyed the subtly they shared, the skirting around the topic of their flirty friendship, or whatever it was, from the safety of fleeting looks, suggestive undertones, and the occasional wink.

Then again, if V were honest with herself, it never seemed to be enough. V couldn’t deny that each time she left his clinic she wanted more. Craved more. More time, more privacy, more touch. She was her own worst enemy in all of those categories, always the first to shy away, to change the subject, to wander off.

“Worst case scenario,” breathed Panam. “He’s not interested in dating someone younger. Or just wants to be friends. That’s fine. Whatever. Should that happen, you delta outta there, lay low for a few weeks, find a new doc, and move on.”

“I can’t just delta out of his life,” groaned V. “He’s been my ripperdoc since I came to Night City. He’s also one of my closest friends-”

“Ok, then suffer. Fuck! Just do something. You’re killing me with this in between bullshit.”

Hours later, their conversation from under the overpass played on repeat inside V’s head. Panam cannot sugar coat anything. She might be physically incapable of doing that. Her words came straight from the heart and that’s what made what she had to say so sincere.

That is at least what V was telling herself as she steadily made her way down the steps to Viktor’s clinic, hands clammy, and body keyed up.

Part of her hoped that he was out or tied up with a patient. Maybe he would tell her to come by later.

She scoffed.

What a stupid thought. She was too quick to forget how often he invited her to stick around if he were operating, how she would wait at his workbench or nap on his crusty couch in the back. Sure enough, she could hear the man whistling below, the cheery sound echoing to where she hesitated. She swallowed.

With a final deep breath, V summoned up the bravery to walk through the metal gate.

Hunched over his operating chair, Viktor appeared to be wiping down between appointments, his rich voice humming along to some song in his head. V watched for a moment, taking in the serene sight before approaching the ripperdoc.

“Surprised you’re not watching a match,” she said.

The humming stopped. His head cocked at hearing her voice.

Without turning he responded, “Aren’t any on right now or you know I would be.”

The rag was tossed down and Viktor shifted to look at her.

V’s stomach flipped. His blue button-up was stained with a dark, oily substance all over the front. The top buttons were either missing or dangling from bits of string, leaving the shirt partly undone and exposing his undershirt. V’s eyebrows furrowed as she noticed a small crack that cut in the corner of his glasses just above a small nick on his cheekbone.

“You look-”

“Like shit?” he finished with a grin.

Viktor crossed his arms, drawing V’s attention to his thick biceps in a knee-jerk reaction.

“Bet so,” he continued. “Someone brought in his friend after a run in with the Tyger Claws, all blood clots and broke teeth. The gonk was scared out of his goddamn mind. Took a toll just to sedate ‘im.”

His smile had turned into a smirk, something confident and full of swagger as he told his story. He wore it well, mastering the balance found only in seasoned residents of Night City, of those who earned their street cred by way of blood, grit, and never backing down. V’s lips pursed at how his eyes looked to hers past those dark lenses.

Here would be the part where V ran away, ran from opportunity, from her feelings. He dared to look at her the way he did in that moment, so smooth, so confident. The man had to know. Viktor had to recognize how he affected her, had to notice how her eyes appreciated his physique, how her complexion warmed when he touched her. His frame had turned to face hers, all broad shoulders and aftershave.

She could step back.

Look away.

This was where she could coolly suppress her attraction and change the subject.

But not today.

“Here,” she said warmly.

V stepped close to the ripperdoc, shrinking the gap between their bodies as her fingers gently plucked the man’s glasses from his face. Viktor blinked in surprise and swallowed as she studied the damaged lens with a critical eye, her own smirk pulling at her full lips.

“Gonna need new ones, doc,” she told him.

Next, V carefully folded the glasses and slid them onto the collar of her top. Viktor’s eyes tracked her movements before quickly glancing away. Ever the gentleman.

“But don’t worry,” continued V. “The rest of you I can remedy.”

He chuckled.

“The rest of me?”

V looked up. She nearly gasped. For Viktor to wear those damn shaded glasses was a sin. The bluest blue that V had ever seen, his eyes were deep like ocean water. There was longing in them. Desire. He adored V for standing so close and showing such concern for his wellbeing. Christ, she could get lost in those eyes if he kept looking at her like that.

To answer his question, V tugged at the hem of his soiled shirt. He stiffened.

“Are you tryin’ to say that you like being covered in… whatever this is?” she mused.

“Well, no-”

In a near whisper, V begged, “Then come on, Vik. Let me play doctor for once.”

Fuck.

The way she was looking up at him with that smile, those bedroom eyes, leaning close like that with her fingers tugging on his shirt and talkin’ in that sweet, sexy voice.

Who was Viktor to deny her?

He sighed out a ‘Fine’ and nodded in agreement. Consent confirmed, V went to work. V’s fingers moved to undo the remaining buttons of his shirt, but Viktor stopped her hands. His own hands were warm, a little rough with scars and callouses on the tips and knuckles. In response to V’s questioning look, Viktor grabbed his shirt and ripped the buttons loose with a jerk. They pattered at their feet.

“Trash,” he stated as he slid his arms free from his shirt. Like the buttons, it went airborne and landed in a nearby biohazard bin.

“Hey now,” warned V with mock annoyance. “I said let me play doctor.”

“Oh am I being a bad patient?” returned Viktor.

To his surprise, V placed her palm at the center of his chest. Her fingers flexed gently against his undershirt, making Viktor’s heart race. She then gave a gentle shove.

“The worst,” she teased as Viktor let her push him back into his own operating chair.

Even if he wanted to, there was no way that Viktor could hide his smile. He was at a loss. What in the world had gotten into V? Not that he was complaining of course, but he was so used to waiting. The flirting, the winks, all those playful innuendos had been going on for such a long time. By now, Viktor simply accepted that she wouldn’t push it further, that their friendship or whatever they had, consisted of only those teasing moments. Nothing more. In the end he believed that V didn’t want anything deeper with the ripperdoc. And that was fine. A bummer, but fine. Didn’t feel bad about it. Didn’t resent her. She was younger, a wild one who made a hobby out of recklessly injuring herself doing God knows what in the city. The man wasn’t new to women or intimacy, and with a woman like V he thought it best to let her set the terms, especially considering that she was after all his patient. A patient who ate his food, slept on his couch, completely ignored his work schedule, and called him ‘pretty boy’ on the regular. A patient no less.

So imagine how fast his heart was racing as her fingers softly cupped his cheek, at how her body leaned in close as she inspected the small cut beneath his eye. Viktor tried his hardest to look off into nothingness rather than at her breasts. Tried to ignore how delicious she smelled. Was she wearing perfume-

“Breathe, Vik,” she mumbled. “Can’t have my first patient black out on me.”

She fucking winked and that goddamn smirk of hers graced her lips.

“I, uh,” he began. He laughed, a bit too nervously for his liking. “I’m sorry, just, just distracted. It doesn’t hurt that much, ya know.”

“How’d he get ya?” asked V.

To Viktor’s disappointment, V stepped away from the chair and walked towards his workbench. He didn’t miss how her hips swayed or how she bent over to grab his medical kit in a nearly exaggerated manner. The way she looked into his eyes while she straightened, all slow and sensual with those curves of hers, went immediately to his dick. He swallowed.

“Um,” he said stupidly. “He, uh, headbutted me. With his head.”

“Ouch,” she replied.

Before she returned to the flustered ripperdoc, V shimmied out of her bomber jacket and tossed it on his workbench. A tattered crop top pulled against her skin as she shook out her dark hair.

Viktor had the decency to rest his hands in his lap to shield the effect that the merc had on him.

Her tongue wet her lips as she fished through the kit for what she wanted. The glance she shot in his direction proved that there was no innocence in the act.

What the fuck was happening?

That question repeated itself over and over again in his mind as she again bent closely towards his body to apply a Q-tip to the wound, offering another delicious view of her ample breasts.

“Can I get some feedback, doc?” she asked quietly.

Viktor swallowed, his mouth dry like sand.

“Yeah, kid,” he replied lowly.

V paused her work to truly look at him, to gaze into those gorgeous eyes of his. Then, all calm and collected, V perched herself next to him at the edge of the operating chair. Viktor allowed her some room as she cupped his cheek with her other hand, her breasts resting on his torso as she leaned into him. Her thumb ghosted his skin, tempting. Teasing. Viktor ignored the urge to press against the throbbing hardness in his pants. The cut long forgotten, his attention was caught up in V’s eyes, the warmth of her skin, her smell, the sultriness of her voice.

“Do you want me?”

Her mouth was so close to his. The warmth of her breath tickled his skin like static. Viktor’s eyes shut in anticipation as V slowly drew herself to his lips.

He felt nothing, but heard the soft tear of paper. Viktor’s eyes fluttered open, brow crinkling in confusion. V had sat up and was unwrapping a small bandage, her eyes fixated on the task while he gaped at her. When it was open, she reached out and carefully applied the bandage to the cut on Viktor’s cheek.

“All done,” she stated in a chipper tone, a wide smile stretched from ear to ear.

Viktor smirked.

“Oh yeah?” he questioned. “Think you’re hot shit giving this old man a heart attack?”

“Think I gave you more than that, pretty boy.”

Her eyes flickered to his lap and back to those ocean eyes. Viktor sat up in the chair, his hands not budging as if his life depended on it.

“You never answered me,” said V, the playfulness gone from her voice and replaced with a feeling that Viktor found it hard to describe.

There was no mystery, however, to how he felt in hearing it. His heart melted at her words, at how the game was finally over and that she, beautiful V, wanted to know if he wanted her. A stupid question, really, but an important one all the same.

“Ah V,” he said with a sigh.

Panic alit her eyes like fire, but it was quickly doused as Viktor took her by the hand.

“Of course I do,” Viktor replied earnestly. He gave her hand a small squeeze. “I’d be a fuckin’ liar if I didn’t.”

For whatever reason, Viktor saw V blink as if there was something odd in what he said. The moment was short and quickly forgotten as V embraced him so hard that the pair fell back in his operating chair, his arm wrapped around waist and his lips pressed into her hair.

[madlilsongbird]

Watching The Amazing Spidernan movies so that I’m all caught up before No Way Home. Will add my thoughts as I have them. Note I am not some big Spider-Man fan nor have I read the comics so if my thoughts sound kinda stupid they probably are.

First movie:

That’s a good trick with the broom. Making a mental note as we speak.

Actually seeing Peter say goodbye to his parents is horrible and I would like to never experience it again

SALLY FIELD IS AUNT MAY?! Why does this one have the good cast? (not good as in better but good as in more well known)

The sexual tension in “good morning flash…good morning Peter” (this is a joke I’m not shipping him with his bully)

Jesus roid rage much?

Shut your blinds! I don’t know who would be looking in your window at this exact moment but close them anyway!

First careful, you never know who is watching what you search (when did I become this person)

Second…curt connors is ableist.

Poor Rodrigo Guevara

Oh internalised ableism. And that is the only comment I will make going forward because my disabilities do not include limb difference and I dont want to overstep.

Stop following the man, you are not subtle…wait wtf how’d he do that?!

This is where he gets his powers right?

Okay but when would 5 men make that much of a fuss over a woman that only 1 of them seems to know?

Same. (This is in reference to smashing the alarm clock)

Oh my god is it really necessary to show all the different kinds of spider bites.

Actually just going back to the internalised ableism thing…he is allowed to feel whatever type of way about his own disability that is his right. But insinuating that all disabled people are weak and wanting to breed out the weakness is eugenics and just kinda gross. THIS is the final comment I will make on the matter.

No but seriously he is way more aggressive than regular teen boy aggressive so either he’s on something or he’s overcompensating for something

The way he looks at him doe (again all jokes am not shipping flash and Peter)

Why is this so awkward? And not like teens navigating a crush awkward just genuinely awkward. I feel no chemistry between them.

I like the song, it’s an interesting choice for this scene but I like it.

Stop does uncle Ben die now? Like I know uncle Ben dies at some point but I was really kinda hoping he just wouldn’t in this iteration. I was going for a ninth doctor moment “just this once everybody lives”

MOTHERFUCKER

God Sally is incredible

Don’t show me moments of Flash being human I might accidentally start shipping them for real and that simply can’t happen.

Oooh he’s a fashion designer

I just really enjoy how he takes the piss out of his victims? Arrests?

Is Gwen aware that the school nurse can’t cure everything? Both legally and just like generally doesn’t have the knowledge to cure everything. She suggests going to the nurse a lot.

This family gives me bad vibes

This is a long movie…it’s not even half way through

Well that’s one way to tell her

NOT GEORGE FOYET!

I think with what I remember of SpiderTobey and what I know of SpiderTom, Andrews Spider-Man is definitely better with the people he’s rescuing. Smoother, good bedside manner.

His sons name is Jack. Why does that make me angry?

So he’s just not gonna rescue the other people hanging off the bridge?

It’s almost poetic that the son of the man tried to stop him the first time will be the one to stop him now

Now how is he getting enough power in the sewer

No means no Peter

Does she die in this one or the next one? I don’t imagine her dying will help captain stacey see him as a good guy

Stan 🥺

This movie is exhausting and I don’t know if I mean that in a good way or a bad way.

MoThEr HuBbArD aRe YoU sErIoUs

He managed to get three whole words out and you didn’t think to ease up on the trigger a little to hear what those words might be?

She’s very clever and I will be sad to see her go

That wasn’t her scream. Or it was but from a different take.

Foyet about to be coming in clutch

I’m going to cry.

He’s so ugly. Some lizards are really cute but lizard + human, kinda gross looking.

Well shit. I didn’t know that happened. I guess what I said about him being upset with Peter about Gwen is irrelevant. Unless it isn’t, like if you believe in the afterlife, imagine how pissed he’s gonna be when Gwen arrives.

He finally got the eggs 🥺

As someone who’s boyfriend at the time didn’t go to her fathers funeral I feel ya Gwen. I mean I don’t care now but at the time it sucked.

Dr Connors was just in a silly goofy mood. He seems to show genuine care for the boy (this is mostly sarcasm).

Second movie

Oh we’re going back to peters dad.

How do they have access to a private jet?

Miss Honey is badass

Ngl I’m actually quite relieved they both died before the plane crashed. Stil devastating though.

Okay so this is first up on the list of potential mystery villains in No Way Home…he looks like a tool.

HeLLo PeDeStRiAnS

He really just let Spider-Man put his hand on his tongue. Sir do you know where his hand has been? Not to mention just in general the feeling of spandex on your tongue. I feel ill.

No respect for the proper care of plutonium.

Please don’t ever say “come to daddy” again 😂

I’m kinda sad Jamie Fox becomes a villain, his character seems kinda sweet so far from the 2 seconds I’ve seen of him

You mean to tell me he missed his girlfriend’s fathers funeral AND her valedictorian speech?!

Stan x2 🥺

Because you can’t lose me you’re going to lose me? 😂

I love her jacket

Why are they still pretending like she doesn’t know?

I may have spoken to soon about Max

See I would be speeding up daddy’s death if he told me he’d passed down a genetic disease and just decided not to tell me.

Friendship.

Okay max is still a little bit nutty but you gotta feel bad for the guy. He must’ve been so scared.

Don’t smile that’s not cute, if he was a regular boy you’d file a restraining order.

Oh I see Spider-Man is gonna fight him which will make him turn and become the “bad guy” whether he will actually be a bad guy is still unknown.

This scene is actually kinda just making me angry (the time square scene)

Cops suck man. Peter was talking him down just fine.

Did nobody teach these people not to touch metal when there’s electricity about.

Interesting that I didn’t pick up any chemistry from them in the first movie weren’t they an actual couple for a while?

Another good song with an interesting placement

I’m sorry did the caller ID not say Mary Parker? How was it Harry on the phone?

Run Gwen!

This version of Harry is kinda creepy I’m sure the actor is swell but the character is terrifying. Original version Harry was swell whereas the actor is…

“Maybe everyone has a part of themselves they hide” gives him the eye

This movies shorter or at least it feels shorter

An excellent show of what happens when you tell a rich daddy’s boy no for the first time.

This makes me very sad. She’s so excited for the possibility of Oxford.

As much as Harry disturbs me, I want him to burn his entire team.

His daddy really did love him!

I think it’s mostly his eyes, his behaviour can be explained by trauma (why I find Harry creepy)

Okay most of his behaviour. The taking joy in killing people that’s just him being nutty and not a trauma response.

This is fucked up. And where is Peter? he is off chasing a girl who has broken up with him twice now.

PLANES NEED THE POWER!

I really like SpiderAndrew, the movies are fine but as a character I thoroughly enjoy him

Sorcerers apprentice who?

Captain Stacy can’t blame him! She’s clearly stubborn as hell and her own free woman

I quite literally stopped breathing (in reference to the almost plane crash)

Is this why they made it Gwen and not MJ so that he could kill her and be an actual bad guy? From my little knowledge of the comics and what I’ve seen from the movies Harry would never hurt MJ so it had to be someone else important to Peter but not super important to him for him to a real bad guy

I like that Harry actually looks like a goblin.

What was the disease he’s supposed to have?

This poor family. I know I said they gave me bad vibes in the first movie but nobody deserves this.

He looks less like a tool with his suit on…but only slightly less

Baby you better get back behind that baracade!

Nobody talk to me I’m very emotional. This child looks very much like a magical mix of all 3 of my brothers put together and seeing him stand there so brave but so scared is doing something to me.

Final thoughts:

So I think SpiderAndrew might be a close second favourite for me. I like the relationships of the original the most, the comedy of the mcu version the most but this one was like a nice in between. Im a little disappointed there won’t be a third not cos I think I would have enjoyed it just cos the original had 3 movies, the mcu version will have at least 3 movies and this one is left out with 2. Don’t think I would have loved Shailene Woodley as MJ though so I dunno. I think the only thing I would have wanted from a third movie is to know who fedora guy is…and for Peter and May to acknowledge that they both know that he is Spider-Man. Apart from that it was fine and I now feel fully prepared for No Way Home.

[lollybliz]

bout to make a Monster of a fic rec post here we go

heyo @jinx108! We’ll start with the complete ones because sometimes you’re just not in the mood to wait for the last chapter, you know? I don't remember details of all of these so i’m just going to copy the author’s summary rather than write my own. I am literally just going through my bookmarks, I got 400 of these to sort through. if ive talked to or am familiar with the author im gonna mention them, but if I mention you and you don't want me to have Please tell me and i’ll remove it.

If you’re not into spoilers Please Tread Carefully, I don't watch out for that stuff so I wont know to label it

1>Crushing Truth by Bunzuku: Tododeku. “Romance is hard enough for a teenager to understand when they have a good relationship role model. For Shoto, it takes two excited meddlers for him to even realize what his feelings really are.“

2>Disowned by b00mgh: tododeku + others. Unrated, some traumatic elements. “Shouto freaks out under a bridge and I use the word "grass" a lot more than I really should. Izuku does his stupid martyr thing and everyone makes continuous references to his propensity to break his bones. Aizawa goes "oh FUCK my kids are dying again" and his students use him as emotional (and physical) support. A friend requests angst, I say what kind, she say idk make someone get disowned and i say oh this I can absolutely provide my good buddy.”

3>cotton candy hands by @chonideno: Kiribaku. I will take Any excuse to rec this fic, its the most fluffy pile of feels Good Lord. also the first fic I ever bound into a physical book. “Studying to become a hero requires knowing how to take care of yourself. Sometimes you might need help on the way so if your crush offers to do your hair for you or to give you a well-deserved back rub, it'd be stupid to say no. A series of soft vignettes in which a love-struck Kirishima and a touch-starved Bakugou care for each other and it's definitely not making their hearts jump through hoops, they’re never this close to kissing, no, they're totally best friends bro“

4>Catching Sight of the Storm by neo7v: Kiribaku, tododeku. A considerable amount of Whump and related angst, and kinda sad tbh. “Blind. Quirkless. Useless.The first two things were stated clearly by the doctor that sat about five feet in front of Izuku. The third was a word that Kacchan called him everytime he failed to make the jump on whatever forest excursion they were on or when he ran into a tree because he hadn’t seen it. “I’m so, so sorry, Izuku.” Was his mom giving up on him already? But he could still be a hero if he tried hard enough, right? Quirkless or not. Blind or not. Just because Izuku was useless now didn’t mean he would stay that way forever, right? *** A Blind!Izuku AU”

5>Yell Heah by fakecharliebrown: Chatfic. M a n y pairings. technically complete, but part of an ongoing series. “Iida creates a group-chat for Class 1-A. It doesn't go as planned.“

6>Sunshine by Rosey_Note: BIG SAD. tw- failed suicide attempt. KiriKamiBaku. “They didn't deserve to put up with his crappy mood. Because Denki Kaminari did not feel like Sunshine right now. And they deserved sunshine. In fact, Denki didn't feel much of anything right now.“

7>Electric Connection by  Onlymostydead: ShinKami. “Kaminari's quirk has always had... Weird side affects. Like his ADHD. And his constant energy. And his insomnia, which wouldn't leave him be right now, when he really needed to just get some sleep. But, thankfully, he has good friends.“

8>The Best (The Worst) by Onlymostydead: no romantic pairing. tw- rampant transphobia, both outside and internalized. “Bakugou Katsuki has known who he was since he was four years old. He was a boy, it was as simple as that. Around his friends, at school... But things couldn't just be that simple, could they?“

9>Lichtenberg Figures by Q_loves_you: no definite romantic pairing. “Kaminari Denki has a very powerful force of nature running through his body. Kaminari Denki doesn't want to hurt anybody. He doesn't always get what he wants, and "anybody" does generally include himself.“

10>Eventuality by KikaTouka: ill be honest I don't remember this one at all, I maaaay not have read it yet :/. anyway. ShinKami. “Shinsou learns more than just hero lessons after being transferred to 1-A.“

11>Pickup Lines for the Soul by MustardSoup: ShinKami. “Denki is twelve when he is flicking through the TV channels and lands on an old RomCom movie about soulmate marks – specifically the same type that he has. “I can’t believe I’ve had to walk around with a cheap pickup line written on my ankle my entire life because of you!” The leading lady yells at the leading man as he stares at her in awe. Denki laughs. “Oh no.” His mother says, watching him. “Oh no, indeed.” His sister repeats quietly.“

12>caught in my own web by @anxioussailorsoldier: ShinKami. “Shinsou needs some help after getting caught up in his capture weapon. Kaminari enters from stage left.“

13>not so summer love by nataliya: ShinKami. “Class 2-B’s common room, although typically quiet, was currently filled with five students—three slowly giving up on homework, one bitching about noise and another that rushes through the front door. “We’ve been waiting for you—” Mina starts, but Kaminari’s vaulting over the back of the couch, eyes wide as he practically buzzes out of his skin, emitting light like crazy as currents dazzle across strands of hair. “I have a big ugly crush,” He steps off the couch and onto the coffee table, much to Bakugou’s chagrin, “On big ugly Shinsou.””

14>Blamed by coldandhotsoba: ShinKami. Tw- they fuckin kill a guy and its a lil nasty. “This was not how the day was supposed to end. They were supposed to end the day like they do most nights.  Kaminari clutching onto him like a koala as he slept, wrapped in the millions of tacky blankets Kaminari had bought. Warm and safe in their bed. It was not supposed to end with both of them tied up in some cold metal room.“

15>Lightning Scars by Present-Mics-Scream (write_your_way_out): Shinkami. “It's hard to be confident in your abilities when you're surrounded by people with incredible quirks. Shinsou Hitoshi would know better than anyone. Sure, he was admitted to the hero course in his second year, but being admitted to the hero course, and keeping up with the rest of the class are two different things. Lucky for him, Kaminari is there to prove that the flashiest quirks come with the largest drawbacks.“

16>See No Evil, Hear No Evil by randomfan188: no romantic pairing. “Kaminari Denki is legally blind. When he forgets to wear his contacts and breaks down during math class, comfort appears in the strangest of ways.“

17>how not to enjoy the weather, an article by kaminari denki by dreamtowns: no defined romantic pairing. “If there was one thing Kaminari hated the most in a world wth villains, it would have to be thunderstorms.“

18>”Studying” by emmyrox22: ShinKami, EraserMic. “Shinsou and Kaminari have been “studying” together for a while (but not for school). Shinsou gets stopped by his dads on the way to another “study” session and mistakes are made“

19>Weaknesses by sunflowerstorm: ShinKami. “Kaminari's quirk and storms compliment each other in the worst way, but he's convinced he can deal with it on his own... until he really can't any longer. When Shinsou accidentally overhears Aizawa confronting Kaminari about recent changes in behaviour and hears about the hell his quirks been putting him through, he can't just pretend he never heard. He wants to help.“

20>it’s hurt denki hours by memeingfultrash: ShinKami + others. ““Certain members of our class are...under the impression that...you’re the traitor.” Denki’s body went cold and felt like he was going to short circuit. ~some of class 1a believes that denki is the traitor and avoid him”

21>Petition to replace Mineta with Shinsou- (signed by Kaminari Denki) by CharaTheQuartz: ShinKami + others. This is one of my favorites, I go back to reread it from time to time. It SAYS 41/42, but that's just a glitch cus chapter 36 doesn't exist for some reason, I talked to the author about it and its fine. “Mineta brings shame to the color purple. You know who does not bring shame to the rich color, but pride and sexual tension to one infatuated Kaminari Denki instead? Shinsou Hitoshi, aka sexy zombie man, aka the most perfect hunk of a man to walk planet earth, aka future husband. Shinsou has finally gotten his chance to prove himself to the hero course, and he did more than prove himself. The only question left unanswered is whether he will start in A or B, and how Kaminari can manipulate the end result.“

22>How to Get a Boyfriend (in Four Easy Steps!) by e1ana: ShinKami, EraserMic, + others. “Step 1: Get kicked out of the house by your homophobic parents. Step 2: Run headfirst into your brooding, mysterious crush. Step 3: Sleep in his dad’s (see: your homeroom teacher) house Step 4: Watch everything you thought you knew go to shit. This isn’t exactly the sweet, romantic plan that Kaminari Denki longed for. Will everything be ok, or will step 5 be to crash and burn?“

23>Bakugou and Todoroki’s Foolproof 5-Step Plan to Fuck with Mineta Minoru by Anubis_2701: Kiribaku, TodoDeku, + others. This is another one of my favorites, and the one I am currently folding and sewing into a physical book. you learn how to do funny things when bored and quarantined ig. “It was a simple enough idea; screw around with the resident bastard of Class 1-A to let him know that his medieval ways and perverted behaviour weren't going to be tolerated by even the most career-focused of UA's students. To say that things had snowballed was an understatement. Todoroki had no idea how he had ended up sitting on Bakugou's floor at 1 am, holding a dossier of incriminating material that would make the FBI slobber, but he wasn't sure he wanted to know. The long and short of it was, fuck Mineta.”

24>Colour Theory by chancellorxofxtrash: TodoBakuDeku. this one’s a series. “Midoriya/Bakugo/Todoroki slow burn soulmate AU. All three of them are nerds with their own emotional issues, trying to navigate their way through becoming heroes, and their own relationship with each other.“

25>Summer Sunshine by Mara97: TodoDeku. Ever want a Barbie in a mermaid tale/Bnha crossover? No? well here you go anyway! “Instead of worrying about college, Izuku spends his summer vacation finding out his father is, supposedly, a dead merman king and going on a quest to dethrone the current king, Endeavor. Along the way, Izuku becomes close to the three journeying with him, makes friends with strangers, starts crushing on an unattainable prince, and, in the end, learns to love himself. Oh, and he saves a kingdom, too.“

26>The snowflakes on our skin and the flames in our soul are one (and the same), my love by missunderstuffyou: TodoDeku, Kiribaku. this is one of the ones I keep a running reread comment going on. its at,,, 6, atm.  “Before your quirk begins to present itself, the soulmate link comes through, and suddenly whatever you write upon your own skin appears on the body of your soulmate. As your soulmate writes to you, the emotions they feel follow through the ink.Izuku Midoriya is four years and a few months old when he first feels the slight ebbing in his arms. It doesn’t hurt… he can just feel something, and it’s enough to make him sprint into his mother’s arms screaming that his quirk is coming. She had been washing in the kitchen, and the sudden screech as her son rockets into her side is enough to make her jump with panic, immediately grabbing at him and looking for cuts and bumps before she understands his words and the stupidly bright, alight smile on his face with large, watery, hopeful eyes. Shoto Todoroki doesn’t feel his soulmate connection open up. It is drowned in the aches of a small body worked far too hard.“

27>It was dark inside the closet by Chad_Champion69420: Pre-ShinDeku? maybe? its tagged shindeku but like. it’ll make sense if you read it. “Midoriya is invited to a party. He and Shinsou decide to play a little trick on the rest of the party during Seven Minutes in Heaven.”

28>how to woo your local trash gremlin: a comprehensive guide by Todoroki shouto by wonhaebunny: TodoBaku. this is the fic that dragged me into todobaku, fun fact. “five times shouto tries to confess to bakugou, and one time he doesn't bother tryingaka: wikihow is a scam and bakugou is a terrible, terrible boy“

29>top ten photos taken right before disaster by Shookspeare: ShinDeku. “Izuku participates in a harmless prank, only to end up ruining it and running for dear life.“

30>Secrets to Share by pechebaie: no definite romantic pairing. “Kirishima comes out first, and nothing changes. Kirishima and Kaminari still hang out to complain about class and talk about boys - and sometimes girls, too, in Kaminari’s case; he still plans stupid pranks with Sero that get them sent to the principal’s or nurse’s office every time; Ashido still kicks his ass at Mario Kart without hesitation; and Bakugou doesn’t get angry at him any more than he usually does.“

31>What One Hides by Pinalinet: TodoDeku. “All Might gives class 1-A an unusual assignment that results in Midoriya Izuku and Todoroki Shouto attending a weekly acting class. But with a mysterious villain targeting individuals without Quirks, and a developing issue of Todoroki's own, an after-school assignment is the least of their worries.“

32>whether or not we’re fated, we’re meant to be by juurensha: KINDA SPOILERY. TodoDeku + others. “Todoroki didn’t have a soulmark for most of his life.His siblings all did, but up until the day of the U.A. entrance exam, he had shoved the idea aside. It’s not like they could help him anyway. And then a 9 appears on his chest, and a green-haired boy barrels into his life with a fire and ice soulmark on his arms, and suddenly Todoroki cares very much about all this could mean.”

33>The Midnight Shift by meiishu @meiishu @totallytodoroki (idk which you’d rather I attach so I went with both): ShinKami. ““Hey Toshi,” Denki says, and he laughs, clearly embarrassed. He’s got on a jean jacket that did him absolutely no help and a white tee shirt that is currently stuck to his torso. It’s got a pikachu design in the center. “By any chance, do you sell umbrellas?” “You really went out in this weather.” Hitoshi deadpans, instead of dignifying that with an answer. or hitoshi works the midnight shift at the gas station, which also doubles as a pokestop for pokemon go. of course, denki is a regular.”

34>Rock the House by AkabaneKayo: ShinKami. “It wasn’t just his bed. It was his entire fucking room shaking. Only one thought crossed his mind at that moment: “Holy shit. My room is haunted.”“

35>Technically, they’re morning kisses by CharaTheQuartz: ShinKami. “Most nights, Shinsou cannot fall sleep. Neither can Kaminari. It seems counterproductive to have a sleepover then, but they try to make it work. And they fail, but that is okay.“

36>someone to call mine by nearly_theyre: ShinKami, EraserMic “From: Me wish you were here, denks From: kitten 💛💘💛 what if i was tho? OR Four times Denki snuck into Hitoshi's room and one time he walked through the front door.“

37>Pretty by Onlymostydead (noticing some repeat authors? me too): no definite romantic pairing. “(Or, Kaminari still can't figure out bra clasps.) Kaminari has never really felt good about himself. Herself? Whichever way, not knowing doesn't make anything easier. Especially when he (she?) and Mina have their bodies swapped during training, and everything seems too right.“

38>If I offer you my hand, will you take it? by bleukitsune: Kiribaku. SPOILERY. ““Why?” Kirishima leaned back on his hands, trying to create some space between them. Too close. The ash-blond looked really nervous, his usually arrogant and cunning demeanor gone. “What do you see when you look at me? Kirishima is worried. Bakugou is hurting. After his confrontation with Midoriya, he finally reaches out to him. “

Theres way more but I haven't tagged them properly yet so that m a y come later if I can ever finish going through and adding my sorting tags.

and then a last few that Are Not Complete but im really very fond of them. not as many as id like to add, but my hands are getting tired tbh.

39>State of Mind by GuardianOfTheLoaf: no relationship YET but its looking like it’ll be either tododeku or shindeku, probably the former. EraserMic. tw- childhood neglect and severe depression. Izuku’s not a happy kid. “Izuku was a late bloomer, his quirk lying dormant until his tenth birthday when in a fit of emotion he grabs his mother and she disappears. With All Might slowly restoring his confidence Izuku begins the difficult journey into becoming a hero.“ 18/? chapters.

40>Izuku Eats His Problems by CosmicAce: ShinDeku. Izuku’s a flerkin, what more could you want? “His whole life, Izuku Midoriya was taught to keep his powers, his Quirk, hidden from the world. His kind were feared, hunted to near extinction because of it. He just wants to show people he’s different. That he can be a HERO. And nothing is going to stop him. Even if his Quirk IS like an eldritch abomination.“ 43/? chapters

and then probably my current favorite bnha fic- although it fights with Apertum Mortem for that spot but that ones d a r k and not here-

41>family of the year by periiwren: EraserMic. “Hitoshi is done. Done with moving around every few months to a couple that will scrutinize him and eventually dump him right back where he started. Good thing he’s well past his strike limit now- at least he can stay in one place, be content to age out of the system and finish out his training with Aizawa. Maybe transfer into the hero course, maybe be a hero- but none of that was guaranteed. The only thing for sure was that he was going to stay in that center for the rest of his childhood. Or so he thought- because Aizawa Shouta and Yamada Hizashi have other plans.“ 24/? chapters. we’ve been informed that this one’s gonne be l o n g and im Very Grateful.

42>Here There Be Dragons by here_and_there: pre-ShinDeku. “Izuku looked at the small circle Aizawa had motioned to in front of them. "I won't fit," he whispered, thinking. He raised his hand, tentatively. Sighing, Aizawa grumbled, "What?" "I-I have a question. Actually, two." His teacher just stared at him, unimpressed. Izuku continued. "Can we activate our quirks before we step into the ring?" Aizawa looked up into the sky, muttering something Izuku didn't hear. "If you must." "O-Okay. Uh, second question. You said we have to stay inside the circle, right?" "Yes." The man looked disappointed, not only in Izuku but in himself for letting the kid speak. "Great. Uh... does that include tails?"“ 6/? chapters.

43>Another Option by sandersonsister: TodoBakuDeku, Touya/Hawks, Dabi/Hawks. Potentially Spoilery, depends on whether horikoshi has the guts to confirm Touya. this one is waiting around the corner with a baseball bat, its really cute, and then r e a l l y painful. it might be getting better though. maybe. it might be getting worse. “When Touya stops his mother from hurting Shouto, he decides enough is enough. He needs to get out of this house and he's taking his baby brother with him.“ 33/? chapters.

That's it i’m done for now, oof. maybe ill edit more onto this post later, maybe i’ll just make another one. hope some of these work!

[brelione]

Ooh congrats on 200 girl!! Can I request something with Rafe please where he slowly falls in love with the reader every time she comes round to tutor Wheezie but she's not interested because of what she's seen and heard about him (non cannon Rafe pls, him just being a rich stuck up dick) so he puts in the effort to win her over and is determined to show her a different side to him!?

Sorry,this sucks lol.

Rafe Cameron,the bitchy,rich,straight white male.He was privileged as all hell and could get away with anything because of his daddy’s money.He did get away with anything,including beating the living hell out of multiple pogues.He was probably the person you hated most in the world and yet you were in his house,being payed with his daddy’s money to tutor his younger sister.You tried not to judge people based on their families but part of you wanted to decline the offer to tutor Wheezie and spit in Ward Cameron’s face.

But of course thats not what happened,you needed money to live and Ward had offered a ridiculous amount.It was your third study session,common core math books and Type Two Writing for Students opened on the table,piles of flashcards and worksheets flooding the marble.

Wheezie needed to go to the bathroom,meaning you were all alone when Rafe came along.Your fingers tightened around your pencil as you went through Wheezie’s first draft,wanting nothing more than to pierce the boys eyeball with the charcoal tip.He stared at you from across the kitchen,looking around with a confused expression. “What the fuck?’He asked.You rolled your eyes,ignoring him. “Who are you and why are you in my house?”He asked,his voice dripping with venom.Wheezie came out of the bathroom,glancing between the two of you. “Shes my tutor,chill.”She sighed,sitting across from you again.The boy glared at you,trying to hide his wonder.

He didnt really know who you were but he was sure he had seen you somewhere.His eyes were focused on your face,trying to figure out if he had seen you at a party or something. “What?”You asked,he shrugged,leaning against the counter and still staring at you.Then it clicked.

He had shown up to a boneyard party,just to be a fucking asshole.He had seen a girl hanging upside down from a tree,talking to JJ Maybank.He could see why he was interested in her,she looked pretty cute,arms crossed over her chest as she swung back and forth.He had always wondered who she was and why he had never seen her before.He thought about her every once in a while,trying to think of why he never saw her again.And here she was,sitting in his kitchen. “You’re a pogue?”He asked,squeezing his cup.You ignored him,tapping your pencil on a word and asking Wheezie what it said. 

“Hey,i asked you a question.”He was closer this time,leaning against the table. “And I ignored you.”You answered,sending a glare his way.He chuckled,shaking his head. “Are you a pogue or not?”He asked.You sighed,looking his way. “Does it matter?Im trying to do my job and you’re being a pest,do you want Wheezie to fail all of her classes?”You asked.He rolled his eyes. “Oh,so you are a Pogue.What does a pogue know that I dont?”He asked Wheezie.You laughed,shaking your head. “We all know you only graduated because of your daddy’s money.You had like...what?A 2.0 gpa?”You teased,gripping your pencil tight.He bit on his lip staring down at you. “Oh,so what’s yours then?”He asked,watching as a smirk came across your face. “4.2,now fuck off.”You growled at him.

Something about the way you told him off completely freaked him out.Most people knew better,especially when they were in his house.He had a habit of sitting on the couch and watching you as you corrected Wheezie’s essays,telling her which words would be better for getting her message across.You would shoot him glares that made his heart beat quicken,making him nervous.Other times he’d see you smile at Wheezie’s progress,his heart beat quickening but for a different reason.As Wheezie put it,he was completely in love with you.He couldnt agree more but didnt want to admit it.He hadnt even talked to you since the first time he saw you.It wasnt until you were packing up your bag and dropped papers that he talked to you again.He had rushed to help you pick them up,handing them to you.

You thanked him quietly,rushing past him.He followed you to the door,working up his courage to talk. “So um...do you have a criminal record?”He asked.You turned,rasing your eyebrows. “Oh,so because im a pogue I have a criminal record?”You asked.He shook his head,mumbling. “No,no not what im saying at all im just trying to make conversation and like….i dont know i just thought it would be a cool question.”He played with his hands,following you outside. “I mean,yeah,I do.I wouldve fuckin gotten away with it too if I was a kook.”You sighed.He laughed nervously,hands shaking a little. “So...what did you do?”He asked.You grinned at the memory. “Vandalism,I used to go around and steal confederate flags and then paint rainbows on their houses.”You answered.He chuckled,nodding.

 “So what did you do with them?The flags,I mean.”he tried to continue the conversation,following you down the driveway. “Burned them.”You answered,turning to look at him again. “Are you gonna follow me home,stalker?”You asked.He blushed,shaking his head. “Um...no,unless you want me too.”He offered.You shook your head,continuing your walk as he just stared at you,jumping up and down,joy washing over him now that he had talked to you without you looking disgusted.He had asked Wheezie to talk to you for him,making her confused. “Talk to her yourself.”She scrolled through her phone.He shook his head. “No,no she hates me I just need you to ask her about like...if shes single,what zodiac sign she likes,what she looks for in a guy.You know what i'm saying?”He asked.She smirked. “You like her!”She exclaimed.He shook his head. “No,im asking for a friend.Please just do this for me,okay?”He asked.She grinned. “So what do I get out of it?I could really go for McDonalds.”She grinned.

“So...what do you think about Zodiac signs?”She asked,writing down some dialogue ideas.You raised your eyebrows. “what?”You asked.She laughed,repeating herself. “Why are you asking?”You asked.She glanced over to Rafe in the living room,the boy twirling his fingers and encouraging her to keep asking questions. “I just think its important that I know.”She mentally face palmed herself. “Ok,Scorpios are superior and Virgos suck ass.”You answered.Rafe’s eyes widened.You had to have known that she was asking for him.You wouldnt have said that if you didnt know he was a virgo. “Ok….what about your ideal first date?”She asked.You laughed,shaking your head. “Keep working on your dialogue.”You told her.

Rafe tried.He really tried so hard.He knew that it was the fact that he was a kook that made you hate him so much.He tried to act more humble,less cocky and tried working on his manners.He went through Wheezie’s instagram followers to find you,cursing when he saw that your account was private. “Wheezie,let me see your phone.”He sighed nervously. “Why?”She asked. “I need to see (Y/N)’s instagram.”He explained,scrolling through your page.You posted pictures of sunsets,your dog and a couple of photos of you holding up peace signs and middle fingers.Your bio made him chuckle. “Fuck the patriarchy and fuck you too.”He went through who you followed,seeing a lot of fanpages and the official Harry Potter account.

That lead him to binge watch the Harry Potter movies,take the sorting hat quiz and order a Slytherin shirt.He purposely wore it when he knew you were coming over,walking into the kitchen.Your eyes fell onto his shirt,laughing. “Oh,of course you’re a slytherin.”You sighed.He grinned. “Wow,thanks.What house are you in?”He asked.He held a long conversation with you as you talked about how much you hate J.K Rowling and how Dobby didnt deserve what happened.He agreed with everything you said,loving the way your eyes lit up.The study session somehow turned into you and Rafe speaking about Draco while Wheezie grinned to herself.

He looked through every single post of yours,every single caption until he learned that you loved horror films.He learned your favorite one,putting it on when you came over.Wheezie didnt even need tutoring anymore,she just liked having you over and you still got payed.You had then become her babysitter because Rafe was deemed to irresponsible and Sarah had a social life. “Dude,are you watching (Y/F/H/M)?”You asked,hearing the dialogue.He nodded,letting you sit next to him to watch it. “I didnt know you liked horror movies.”You sighed,leaning back on the couch.He blushed. “Only this one.”He answered.

It took him three months of talking to you about Harry Potter and horror films for you to stop telling him off,cussing him out and giving him glares.He could feel himself falling for you more,seeing who you were when you werent angry or annoyed.He avoided The Cut,learning that maybe if he let go of his Pogue Beater reputation you’d eventually like him.He tried to be more open,to tell you about himself and have deep conversations with you.He answered your questions honestly,laying his trauma and issues bare and letting you ask questions about the worst sides of his life.He had cried in your arms a couple of times,becoming your friend.He had gotten buried deep in the Friend Zone but he was fine with that,knowing you didnt hate him anymore.You two would hang out all the time outside of babysitting Wheezie,he’d come down to the beach with you to have splash fights.

One night while you were at the beach,the area completely empty besides the two of you as you splashed cold water at eachother.He had pushed you into the water,your clothes,hair and skin becoming soaked.You jumped up,hugging him tight and getting him soaked too.He pulled away,grinning down at you.He didnt know why he thought it was a good idea,leaning down and kissing you.All the three months of feelings spilled out just then,his hands holding your waist tight.You didnt knew what to do,what to think,pulling away. “Um….so you just-what?”You huffed,trying to understand.His bottom lip trembled,his hands shaking. “I just….I dont know.”He mumbled,still holding you.You nodded,finger tracing his jaw. “So you dont know why you did that?”You asked.He looked out at the ocean,biting his lip. “Cause I like you...love you and I just thought….”He mumbled,trying to form words.You rolled your eyes,pulling him into another kiss. “Asshole.”You grinned,running a hand through his hair.

@sexytholland @28cnn  @popcrone818 @fttayla @cherryobx @n1ghtsh4d3-67 @drewstarkeyobx @poguestyleskye @judayyyw @jjtheangel

[woulddieforperrytheplatypus]

do you have any hcs of characters that have very little screentime? like background villains or characters that only appear in like one episode? sorry if my phrasing is weird, i just wanna make sure im not the only one who's latched onto characters like Professor Mystery or Orville and have dragged them into headcanon hell.

I literally love minor characters purely because you can make up as many headcanons as you want and no one can tell you you’re wrong omfg it’s time ti rantttt

I’m gonna go out on a limb and say you probably sent this after reading this post just because you mentioned Orville and I have literally never seen anyone else mention Orville in my entire life so this first one’s basically a repeat but shhhh we’re gonna pretend it’s not

- Dr. Diminutive does more evil than any other evil scientist at LOVEMUFFIN. Heinz and Rodney are all about the show, but Diminutive keeps his ideas to himself so he can get away with a lot more without OWCA asking questions. He would have been a much better leader for LOVEMUFFIN had he not been dismissed for his height. 

- Dennis the Rabbit used to be OWCA’s best agent. He was even better than Perry, and they’d worked a few cases together back in the day because they were the best OWCA had. 

- I don’t know if Monty counts as a minor character, but I headcanon that he and Vanessa only broke up because he was too busy with work, and that not long after the summer ended, he started traveling a lot for OWCA. 

- Again, Lawrence isn’t too much of a minor character but tbh he doesn’t get as much screen time as he deserves so we’re gonna go with it. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Lawrence absolutely knows Perry is a secret agent. He never mentions it for the same reason he never mentions the boys’ inventions: he doesn’t think anything of it. 

- Roger is such a hit with the American people that they get rid of the rule that you have to be born in America to be president just so he can be president. They almost revoke the two-term limit too, but the rest of the government has to step in for that one.

- I will admit that I didn’t think of this one myself but Lyla was totally raised by animals, but, unlike Heinz, she actually sees herself as an animal more than she sees herself as a human.

- Mama Ocelot didn’t really like Heinz, but the baby ocelots loved him. They saw him as one of them, but they also knew he was different, too, and that made him really cool. 

- Charlene is a really nice, really successful woman. She was decently wealthy growing up, but earned most of her fortune herself through hard work. Part of the reason she liked Heinz was that he was never after her money, and he didn’t treat her any differently when he found out that she was on the road to riches. Even now that she’s stuck paying alimony, she doesn’t mind because even though Heinz should get a job and god knows there are some he’d be really good at if he’d just try, he’s clearly a good person and he clearly cares about Vanessa. Also, she finds Norm very weird but she still thinks he’s cool.

- Unpopular opinion but I think Heinz’s dad was worse than his mom, but we don’t see him enough to know that.

- That one Scottish cousin Ferb has that we literally see for like two seconds is actually Ferb’s favorite cousin and the feeling is mutual. The Scottish cousin is always trying to convince his parents to let him visit Ferb, partially because he wants to see Ferb again in person for the first time in ages but mostly because he’s never met the Flynn-Fletchers and he really wants to meet Phineas and Perry in person.

- This is another one I’ve mentioned before but 2D Candace and Perryborg were basically mortal enemies, and even once 2D Doof is locked up again, they have a very strained relationship because they both remember that they’ve hurt each other a lot and neither of them are quick to trust the other (and one day I will write a fanfic about this but I gotta finish one of my WIPs first)

- Jerry the Platypus was so fucked up that he didn’t disappear with the rest of the Perry clones. He showed up again in something, and I totally didn’t just stop what I was doing to google it but yeah, he showed up in the preview for Meap Me In Saint Louis (ya know, the third Meap episode) and even though none of the preview scenes are used at all like they look like they will be, this one is because Jerry is alive and he is adorable and no one can take that from me!

- Steve the no-longer-giant chameleon is also absolutely fine and probably living his best life with Jerry. 

And off the top of my head, that’s about all I got! I hope you cringed a little while reading, and if not, I didn’t do a good enough job 🙃

[koalaaquabear]

The 5 hour finale live stream just concluded and y’all, it was crazy. It has been a wonderful several months with all you guys and I am so excited for April 8th and Junior Year. 

MASSIVE SPOILERS UNDER THE FOLD IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED THE STREAM YET. Here is my clusterfuck of a commentary. Enjoy!

Fantasy High: Sophomore Year Live Reaction -HOOT GROWL BABY it's time. I didn't react to part one but wOW that one was crazy. Get ready for EMOTIONS :'(( -SIG FIG RESCUE MISSION lol #ontour -well ok brennan that canopy shit is scary as fuck -murph is still looking like riz -Zaphriel and Ayda!!!!!!! -"HOLD ME BACK GORGUG" i love u emily -Brennan I stg -Ayda is Gorgug's dad lol -oh shIT they're totally in the cottage -heLL YEAH AYDA!! -oh GOD figayda kiss? exceptional. -if ayda dies i WILL throw dice at Brennan -ok brennan make me cry then -GET THE VAN GORGUG -gorgug truly is the greatest wizard of this age -#hugeblueguy -aww zac oyama i love you -"semi-fallen" oH dEar -gorgug texts zelda IMMEDIATELY i love him -amaZING thank you zelda -"ew, creepy, hate that" -zaphriel is the best character you guys, what a homie -i keep forgetting ayda can fly. like she has wings. i know that. -AELWYN! -nOPE someone is coming through the forest and if it's arianwen i will kill cry -HANGMAN???? -HANGMAN!!!! HIS DOG!!!!! -HANGMAN NO I LOVE YOU YOU'RE THE CUTEST DOGGY -adaine i love you baby -"the weak yogurt man" -what high ranking devil??? -fabian you're adorable -aww fabian has a puppy!! (i get that the hangman is eight feet long don't @ me) -that's the first "the ball" -lou can never have the highest roll -BARDY BOYS -oop kristen and riz time -tracker? i barely even know her -chills, brennan. chills -someone in the chat just said "so did skrank fuck zelda?" -intense muSIC -nononononononono -ragh, tracker, and sandralynn better be all right -ooo a sTICK -HELL YEAH RETURN OF THE RIBBON DANCE -"riz weeps" holy shit i love him -"something bad always happens when we go off together" -#RIZTEN -awwoOOOOOOO -ayda can fly too! -absolutely FUCK this bridge ABOUT 30 MINUTES -poor ayda -please say they're ok brennan -"put your tongue baCK in your mouth" -sANDRA LYNN NO -"what kind of arrows" "you know what kind" fuCK OFF BRENNAN -if baxter dies i will cry -wait faerie fire is a cleric spell..? absolutely fuck me -ok aelwyn let's fuck shit up -calling the bank in the middle of this nightmare forest lol -heLL YEAH ZAPHRIEL -luck check luck check luck check -"y'all are going to turn into dragons" -fabian straight up cries? what a fucking rich kid -NO WAY HE HAD T H E COIN??? -REMOVE CURSE BABY -"nnOOO!" lmao -ally and brennan are in the chat -kristen's religion is REALLY coming in handy -the name was turned into the night yorb lol -"how's that axe feeling?" "..pretty light ;)" i love him -ayda can lift the axe??? exceptional -FIG IS KALINA? ABSOLUTELY RAD -brennan has created a place where illusions are real and emily is holding him TO IT -"do you have a dongle?" incredible -EMILY I LOVE YOU! KALINA IS A YOUTUBER BABY -wretchrot is baCK baby -aelwyn i love that -"i am a low quality child" "yeah ayda you're a bad kid" -"hey bitch" emily axford is a goddess -im sorry cOURT OF ELDERS? -NO I WILL CRY -ROLL INITIATIVE TIME -go OFF hangman -ooo some high initiatives babyyy -zac oyama is my favorite ever -"trackerrr" -brian as soon as emily was threatened said "how dare you" -brennan you FUCK "i'm awake for all of this" FUCK YOU -fig and her mommy issues: an album -absolutely FUCK THE TREE GUY -kick that wood elf BITCH ABOUT ONE HOUR -fuck him UP fabian, shit in his gODDAMN mOUTh -"SPRING BREAK YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKER" -pleASE BRENNAN LET HIM SHOOT HER WITH THE TINCTURE -spRING break this is for the corn god -okay nevermind riz is holding his action -i love the intrepid heroes they're adorable -"ice feast" fucking love them so much -yES the ball thank GOD -brennan..? -"her rage ends" tracker = barbarian -FIRST NAT 20 BABY -"IT 100% WORKS BUT IT 50% WORKED" -that's the second "the ball" -bOOOOOOO BRENNAN -mad plans for the tree guy -sorry, is his name crAFTME ROOTDRINKER? -oh ok it's aelwyn we're fine -cone of cOLD baby i love aelwyn what a babe -you absolutely hate to see it -ragh my baby i love you -SPRING BREAK -tracker nO PLEASE -TRACKER JUST CRIT OH NO -brennan is really good at acting this btw -wait 14 on a crit??? i mean oH NO kRISTEN, bOO -disPEL MAGIC BABY -ALLY BEARDSLEY YOU ABSOLUTE GOD -aww kristennn is babyyy -tracker nooo don't cryyyy -you've sAVED your GIRLFRIEND -"some of us have already done that today" fig the sHADE -ally simply musT get new dex -absolutely fuck that brennan i don't need that vampire pixie -FUCK IT UP AYDA -FIGHT ME IN THE SKY! -"does a 29 hit?" daMN zac that absolute SHADE -53 DAMAGE?? CHEJ IS SO FUCKING STRONG -"goddamn paper lantern" -absolutely fuck you brennan -nevermind gorgug and adaine both passed the con saving throw -"i don't like you" lou really gets personally upset about this and i love that -nO NO NONONONO aelwyn and tracker are down -FUCK IT UP ADAINE -gdi brennan don't do this to us -ABSOLUTELY FUCK THE TREE -fig is straight up gonna kill her mom -this is scary as fuck -HANGMAN HAS A BREATH WEAPON AND YOU DIDN'T SAY SHIT??? CHOKE ON GRAPES BRENNAN -FUCK EM UP HANGMAN ABOUT 1 HOUR AND A HALF -wood elf is DOWN baby hoot growl -kristen thinks the elf is gak lol -23 DAMAGE??? AC OF 25??? ABSOLUTELY FUCK IT UP FABIAN -SHENANIGANS TIME FOR MURPH -HELL SECRET AGENT TIME -27??? RIZ YOU'RE THE HOTTEST -third the ball -imagine the ball is secretly SO HOT without the hat -YES BRENNAN GOT A NAT 1 EAT YOUR GODDAMN DICE -sweEET -fourth the ball (they've all been Lou cuz of course) -incredible turn murph -kalina is SO GOOD at skateboarding -#bloodphoto -KALINA HAS 23 WISDOM? absolutely fuck me -oh hELL YEAH FIG COUNTER THE COUNTER -emily is doing some SHIT right now you guys (fear spell) -DAMMIT that high as fuck wisdom -sorry WHAT she rips open sPACE??? -BABY BETTER SAVE THE GODDAMN DAY -let's go BABY -"mMMHHHHnnN leET ME tOUCh ItT" baby is fucking weird -"baby vs mommy" i love you siobhan -aelwyn better not DIE brennan -riz baby let's get it -trACKEr -nAT 1??? kristen is unCONSCIOUS?? -HUMAN DETERMINATION!!! THE GRIT BABY] -wait aura of life is badass!! they can't lose damage?? -okay scrap that we're gonna TURN UNDEAD and then MASS HEALING WORD? absolutely incredible -gorgug has so much goddamn health -FUCK THIS TREE DUDE -KILL IT AYDA LET'S GO -"her girl's side" *in lou voice* okAY bRENNNAn -second nat 1 but both of them re-rolled -GEM!!!! -LET'S GET GORTHALAX BABYYYY -"BIG DADDY" -ayda is so turned on lol -KILL IT CHEJ OKAYYYY -fuck this centaur -i'm so nervous -puT THOSE DICE DOWN BRENNAN -"you're gonna drop." shuT UP -riz is fULLY DEAD???? -i hate this. i hate this. i hate this. i hate this. i hate this. i hate this. -sHUT UP BRENNAN -baby is DEAD oh my GOD you absolutely hate to see it ABOUT 2 HOURS -nO NO NO NO NO NO NO PUT THAT CROWN AWAY BITCH -absolutely fuck me, the nightmare king is totally fucking back i hate myself -aww fabian is baby -hELL YEAH FABIAN SPRING BREAK -"i've lost one friend, that's too many" fabian is adorable -"that's a full ass miss, my guy" -sandra lynn just crit on chej :(((((( -14 damage is not very spring break of her (she did 28 but it was halved because gorgug is such a strong boyyy) -LET'S GO LOU -almost all of them are spellcasters wtf (only one who isn't is riz but he has a daily misty step) -fuck em up hangman -fUCK EM UP HANGMAN! d8 + 2d6 +8 i think -figaroth the unfaethable baby -THOSE ARE SOME SHENANIGANS FIG I LOVE IT (she's shattering the rubies to get a revivify diamond) -casts teleport??? aelwyn came here to FUCK -"i would love to teach you this spell" aww the abernant sisters liking each other is my new aesthetic -fuck em up adaine -you can hit the tree on a 12 babyyyyy -heLL YEAH 44 DAMAGE ADAINE IS STRONG NOW -kalina is not even that cool she just said "that's enough of that" in the most uncool way -2 down 3 to go! -omg wait it would be so badass if they could just remove curse on kalina -"Mr. The Insatiable" -ayda is such a sweetheart "i don't care if you want me to date your daughter but i do hope you love me" -"I LOVE THIS SONG" yes siobhan me too -on a DC 20 she got a 31!!!! consider my jeans creamed -SHRED BABY GIRL!!! -KILLIAN IS DEAD! RIZ IS ALIVE! -ayda is so turned on AHHH -I LOVE RIZ SO MUCH "am i interrupting something???" -fuck him UP chej! 3 hits, no crits -hell yeah mr. march!! oh sorry wrong series -a gROUP PROJECT i'm DEAD -someone in the chat called him "snac oyama" and you're rigHT -siobhan's straight fucking this tree UP -the spellcasters are like all out of spells at this point -fuck OFF arianwen. KILL YOUR MOM -"where's your father, aelwyn?" "last i saw, adaine killed him so *shrug*" i lOVE HER -FUCK THEM UP GORTHALAX -abolutely fuck the nightmare king -waIT GORTHALAX IS GONNA KILL THE NIGHTMARE KING -sidenote: fig calls gorthalax pops -dO IT BRENNAN kILL YOUR OWN BIG BAD -this treeant has GOT to be dead -NAT 1 on that attack?? SPRING BREAK BABY -no we haven't seen kalina in action brennan, and we do not want to -OH SHIT THE TIE! YOu just got FUCKed bRENnan eaT youR DICE -yeS AYDA ROAST HER -"GOTTEM!" -i'm sorry i just hallucinated, did you say 6 ATTACKS? -time to go VIRAL BABY -19 intelligence, 23 wisdom, 20 charisma for kalina? absolutely fuck me -riz just got kICKed! you absolutely hate to see it -GODDAMMIT -KALINA IS HOMOPHOBIC CONFIRMED ABOUT 2 AND A HALF HOURS -brennan be like "im about to kill this bird" -absolutely fuck me i hate this -let's go FIG -time to caTCH the bALL -murph has the same thinking face as riz and it's adorable -this is not very spring break brennan -DC 25 acrobatics check? c'mon faBIAN -29????? -fifth the ball (from the hangman) -"there's just something endearing about him" fabian loving his friends is adorable -absolutely fuck me that fire elemental is adorable -absolutely swaddle the ball -well hot take but fuck the nightmare king you guys -absolutely NOT brennan do NOT kill adaine you PSYCHO BITCH -PLEASE ADAINE LIVE -STRAIGHT DEAD? FULLY DEAD? FUCK OFF WITH THIS INSTAKILL SHIT BRENNAN -hell yeah ayda is back and kristen has the revivify diamond -aelwyn FULLY banished that unicorn -it's good to know ragh really doesn't want them to die -YES RAGH IS BACK BABY -fuck em up kristen -s/o to DND Beyond btw absolutely banger website -hell yeah mass healing word is awesome -clerics are GOOD you guys i should play more clerics -FUCK IT UP AYDA -SANDRA LYNN IS BACK BABY -skater chej is my favorite thing -aBSOLUTEly fuck the tree -i have no idea wHAT is happening ABOUT 3 HOURS -fuCK YOU nightmare king -i absolutely hate this battle but at least gorthalax is still standing -gorgug better split this gd tree -"what if we just kill kalina?" yeah zac it's that goddamn easy -brennan almost just fucked everyone -"does she want to borrow my teddy bear?" the SHADE -"MAKEOVERRR" i love you siobhan -this tree SUCKS -battlemaster is cool as fUCK SPRING BREAK -BARDY BOYS also i think that was a nat 20 -i can't imagine the thistlesprings watching the battle livestream and like worrying if gorgug is going to die -FUCK HER UP THE BALL -ABSOLUTE SHENANIGANS FROM MURPH! -with ADVANTAGE BABY -"has anyone seen my hat!?" keep it off baby you're HOT now -"mirrors negate mirrors" "i think oscar wilde said that" i love them -#hotrizweek? -holy shit fig is FUCKING THIS BATTLE UP -HELL YEAH KALINA ROLLS A NATURAL 2!!!! -hell yeah adaine is back and SO MUCH is happening that i'm like forgetting to write down my reactions -kill this woody motherfucker baby -the music is too lOUD -ok it's normal now -fuck em up gorgug -i'm sorry the chat is saying he did 90 DAMAGE?!?!?!? -KILL IT CHEJ ILY -fuck off brennan, absolutely fuck off -ABSOLUTELY FUCK OFF BRENNAN -gorthalax is FULLY DEAD? absolUTELY FUCK YOU -SAINT KRISTEN APPLEBEES -adaine has SOLVED THIS SHIT -god all the abernant names are confusing -fuck you kalina ABOUT 3 AND A HALF HOURS -BRENNAN I STG IF RAGH ENDS UP DEAD -hellish rebuke that bitch -c'MON faBIAN HIT that BITCH -wait is kalina a rogue and a druid? absolutely incredible -FUCK IT UP FABIAN -OMG THE HANGMAN BETTER FUCK THIS UP -YES THE BALL 31 DAMAGE -so the stream just ended. i'll say it again: absolutely fuck me -ok so we're back and kalina got fucked up -WHAT THE FUCK A NAT 20???????? YOU ABSOLUTELY LOVE TO SEE IT -ALLY WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THIS -I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS AND NEITHER CAN BRENNAN -MAGIC IS REAL AND SO IS MY ALLY -i can't believe this. eat your GOD damn DICE brennan! -OMG ARE THE NIGHTMARE KING AND THE GODDESS ONE AND THE SAME? -THEY ARE! THE NIGHTMARE KING IS THE NIGHTMARE QUEEN -brennan is CRAZY AHHHHH -brennan absolutely stop this tension -28 insight. brennan is fucked -GO TOWARDS HIM KRISTEN -YES!!!! PLEASE SAY THIS IS A GOOD THING -ALLY GOT A NAT 20 THEY BETTER BE RIGHT -fear. is. not. real. -this is just like the ending of moana -NO WAY BRENNAN I LOVE YOU (you wouldn't believe it from what i have said but it's true) -this is intense i'm about to cry -you're meeting god and you say "is it too early for this?" -LMAO 5'9" -Moral of the story: IDK and that's OK -ok ally make me cRy -HELL YEAH NEW SHIRT BABY -i'm so emotional -"well oBVIouslY cASsAndRa" i wish every deity had names as normal and human as cassandra -fuck them UP cassie -i love that tracker's just like "uh... babe?" -love having god in your corner -no more hangman puppy :((( -RIZTEN are the CUTEST i love them "i love all of them, riz the most, we know this" -"we still need the crown for our grade" FABIAN I LOVE YOU -"counselo- former counsel- i'm an assistant :(" why do y'all think this man is hot -KILL ARIANWEN -"she tried to hurt me in my shattered state?" "that's her MO" aww adaine my baby -HOLY SHIT PLEASE GIVE GILEAR ALL OF ARIANWEN'S MAGIC -GORGUG YOU SWEETHEART I LOVE YOU -cassandra throwing SHADE -ThE vANdS -aelwyn throwing SHADE -AWW RAGH I LOVE YOU BABY brennan lives another day -"a big bug gave me a riddle" that is NOT what happened -aww the hirelings are all crying and i DO NOT stan -hell YEAH cassandra OH I STOPPED KEEPING TRACK OF TIME IT'S BEEN OVER 4 HOURS -hELL YES HANGVAN -i love you fabian -nO IS CHUNGLE DOWN BIM REAL? -maybe the real chungle down bim is the friends we made along the way -GARTHY i love them -arthuR aGUEFORT - absolutely wild -ayda and arthur is crazy -"snOGGING THE HEADMASTER'S DAUGHTER ARE WE?" -awww that is so smooth fig "you don't need to make me the most magnificent creature because it seems you already have" -ARTHUR PULLS THROUGH -garthy is a cutie i love how they care so much for ayda -oH FUCK ME garthy is ayda's child from her previous life -"your girlfriend's daughter fucked your mom!" goddammit siobhan i can't handle this -if they fail i will cry -CHRONOMANCY!? absolutely fuck me -"professor principal headmaster aguefort" -hell yeah arthur you're killing it -faelwyn? absolutely can't handle it -aww kristen is baby -jawbone and sandra lynn are ok? amazing -jawbone is the best character -"our parents are great" kill me why don't you siobhan -AWWW FUCKING STOP BRENNAN WITH THESE GIFTS -i just cried he wants to adopt her -"you're easy to love" jawbone is fUCKING me up -LYDIA BARKROCK what a badass i love her already -"a pheonix whom everyone she touches is reborn better" fuck off emily -gorgug is a cutie <3 <3 -ABSOLUTELY KICK SKRANKS BIRD ASS -GORGUG CONFIRMED FUCKS -riz is a dork i love him -who knew "you're so much like your father" could make me feel like that -GILEAR IS MOVING THE FUCK IN BABY -GILEAR WITH SELF CONFIDENCE IS MY AESTHETIC -aww jawbone gave ayda autism books? jawbone is the sweetest to ayda cuz OF COURSE HE IS -AYDA GETS HER SPELL!!! -Ayda's Comprehend Subtext is the cutest spell ever -adaine and fig's friendship is too cute -craig has always been down for everything. i don't know craig but i love him -YES HOOT GROWL HOOT GROWL I'M SO PROUD OF RAGH -"BAD KIDS FOR LIFE" RAGH IS A CUTIE -NO FAELWYN IS REALLY HAPPENING I CAN'T -fabian's laugh is so cute -i love how nervous fabian is -WAIT FABIAN AND AELWYN ABSOLUTELY WILL FUCK? -fabian's gonna get his KISSES IN -aww i get how hyped figayda is but they are truly so adorable -weLL EMILY AXFORD I WILL LET YOU HURT ME LIKE THAT -they said i love you :((( -tracker only deserves the best -TRACKER'S GOING TO FALLINEL? I LOVE HER -ragh is going too? gay road trip! -that's adorable -ABSOLUTELY NOT BRENNAN FUCK OFF DO NOT SAY THE NIGHT YORB IS GONNA BE THE NEXT VILLAIN -BRENNAN NO YOU BITCH I HATE YOU THE NIGHT YORB IS THE VILLAIN OF JUNIOR YEAR? -that was crazy. i cried, i laughed. i am fuCKING HYPED FOR CROWN OF CANDY AND JUNIOR YEAR GANG!

[star-veil]

reddie hurt/comfort with richie getting injured & trying not to be a baby about it?

ohf cdsnkfjsdh Im gonna revisit this prompt when I get better at writing ficlets bc this was such a good prompt but I feel like I bombed it bc I havent written in foreverthat being said!! pls don’t reblog this ! likes and comments are greatly appreciated but this is kind of a warm-up for me and I’m way too hard on myself!!

also this is non-established reddie but they r in love they just havent said it out loud yet

send me a prompt but dont look at my awful theme

“Holy FUCK!”

At the bottom of the hill, the hill which was behind the bushes Richie had oh-so-gallantly offered to clear for Eddie, were Richie’s third pair of broken glasses that month. They had split right down the middle upon impact and the right lens was shattered into oblivion. Oh, and also Richie, sitting dazed and dirt-scuffed among plants flattened from his descent.

Eddie gawked at him.

“Yeah, I’m fine, thanks, dickwad!” Richie yelled, grabbing for his glasses in the dust.

“Rich, oh my god, oh my fucking god- you- oh fuck-” he began to ramble, pausing only to grab for his inhaler. “Your-” Inhale. Coughing exhale. “Your fucking leg!”

Richie placed his broken glasses on his face, and looked down.

Whatever eldritch scream he had just unleashed was a sound Eddie had never expected to come out of Richie. His ankle, purpled and swelling rapidly, was bent at an unholy angle, looking way to nauseatingly similar to the sprain Eddie had suffered in… in the place he couldn’t think nor speak of without letting out a wheeze of panic. And now there was Richie, broken, staring at him stupidly, the adrenaline not yet worn off to reveal a fresh hell of pain. Where Eddie was usually the one in distress, the one in need of saving, seeing Richie in the same situation churned his stomach. There was no way in hell he’d be able to carry him all the way back to their bikes.

“Eds…” Richie looked back down at his ankle. He winced, and although Richie caught it (and suppressed it, for fear of worrying his overly anxious friend), Eddie saw it- the way his eyes shut and his lip twisted into a grimace. Oh boy. Now the pain was gonna start to kick in.

Eddie was scrambling down the hill as soon as he could snap himself out of his worried loop of “Richie’s fucked, Richie’s fucked, Richie’s fucked!”. Compassion for the other clouding his mind and sight almost lead him to topple over and befall the same fate as Richie. He caught himself, and came to a stumbling halt beside his best friend.

By now, Richie was breathing raggedly through his teeth, turning his head away from Eddie in an attempt not to let him see the beginnings of tears budding at his eyelids.

“Oh god, okay, um,” Eddie’s mind raced. Ah! Back in that horrible, dark place, he dug out a memory. Richie had been there for him when he fell. All the losers had- they saved his life- but Richie, that asshole, was the one to grip his arm and slam it back into it’s socket. He remember he screamed like hell. With a new breath of confidence, Eddie decided- I can do this.

“Okay Rich, I-I’m gonna fix you up, I promise,” Eddie reached out, then winced- gross, purpled flesh, heat swelling and flushing with blood- and then reached out again and grabbed his upper ankle.

Richie started to scream, but it got cut off in his throat as a choke. God, this was so wrong. Where were his jokes, his quips, his stupid inappropriate mannerisms? Eddie had felt the pain of a broken bone, but it still drained all the color from his face seeing his friend so out of character.

“I’m gonna snap it into place, okay? Hold still. One, two-”

“EDDIE DON’T YOU FUCKING TOUCH ME I SWEAR TO GOD-”

He didn’t have Richie’s iron will. He didn’t have his iron stomach, either, and his bravery and confidence all wilted away as he dry-heaved into the weeds beside Richie.

“Okay, fuck, god,” he pulled himself back together. “No touching, got it. We have to get to our bikes.”

Instantly, Richie tried to stand up. He swiped a tear away with the back of his hand and pushed to his feet. Eddie didn’t have enough time to react- wanting to reprimand him, help him, and call him a dumbass all at once. Richie stood, and then his knees buckled, and Eddie grabbed his arm and felt his weight collapse into him.

“Richie, you idiot, you can’t fucking walk on a broken fucking ankle!” Eddie hissed. Richie tried to bat his arm away but despite being physically stronger than Eddie the walking beanstalk, his fight was drained out of him. No fucking wonder.

“Okay, I have an idea,” Eddie stated, half-carrying, half-supporting Richie.

Richie tried, he really did try, to make a retort without crying in pain. “Better be fucking quick,” he winced.

“Remember when Stan stepped on that nail in the quarry and we all panicked ‘cause he was bleeding like a sieve?”

Eddie met Richie’s eyes, and was greeted with the most stubborn death-stare he’d ever seen.

“No way, Eds. I’m not riding on your back.”

Eddie shrugged, and swung Richie’s arm that he was holding around his neck, grabbing his other one and hoisting him onto his back. Despite Richie’s groans of protest and profanities, Eddie began to trek back through the forest and up to where there bikes were parked on the flats by the Kissing Bridge.

About halfway there, Richie relaxed, and rested his head on Eddie’s back. Though he was heavy, (were Eddie’s muscles just frail and unused?) Eddie carried his best friend with gritted teeth and a promise to make him see a doctor when they got home.

And home they did get, and when Richie collapsed on the dirt by the Kissing Bridge after riding on Eddie’s back up the path, he seemed to have forgotten about the urgency of the situation.

“This’s been a great date, Eds, but I really oughta get home,” he joked, but his tone was darker, obviously laced with pain.

Eddie was hoping to flag down a car and get a ride to the hospital or one of their homes. He was pacing anxiously by the road and reaching for his inhaler every few moments.

“C'mooonnn Eddie, a guy’s getting a little lonely-”

Richie was cut off as Eddie spun around and walked toward him with intent. Furious intent.

“You idiot!” He cried. “You’re seriously fucking hurt! And you’re- you’re joking? Really Rich? You could have died. Do you know how many infections you can get down there? Hell if I know why you made me go down there in the first place-”

Richie closed his eyes, creasing his brown gently with a frown, and for a moment Eddie froze and thought, oh shit, my best friend is dead.

And then he opened them again.

“Sorry, Eds.” He said quietly.

Oh.

Eddie felt his heart break in two. He closed the distance between them and put both hands on his shoulders.

“No, fuck Rich, I’m sorry. You’re gonna be okay. We’re gonna fix you up.”

He wrapped his arms around Richie’s neck, and pulled him into a warm, unrelentingly loving hug.

[bobowhooo]

Sugarboys 3

Genre: Comedy/Fluff/Smutty/The hoes baekon and yoda back at it again

Summary: The boys become reps for the “loey corp” and baek falls in love at first sight??

Third shots the charm *wink*

    “A foursome?”

        “A foursome.”

Chanyeol laughed at my joke while keeping his eyes on the road. I gripped the seatbelt stretched across my sexy ass chest and pushed my head back into the headrest. The weather is nice and I just so happen to get a bonus for my efforts last night. Nothing can ruin my mood today.      

“But baekhyun, are we really going to have a foursome? Because as much as I love you, I don’t think I want to see your dick, dude.”       

“Obviously not, you fucktard. They just want us to go have lunch with them in the office. Can you handle that? And what do you mean you don’t think!?” I yelled at him after processing his words.     

“I'm not completely sure if I want to or not.” Chanyeol said in a nonchalant tone.  

“Chanyeol. I think you need to go ahead and figure that out, my guy.”   

“Don’t say it like that, it’s not like that.”   

“Are you sure? You know you can tell me anything, man. I mean, I am a dangerously handsome person so I can understand the attraction.”   

“I promise, if you don’t shut up, I will kill us both.” Chanyeol spoke with a giggle invading his words, gripping the steering wheel harder with a smile on his face.  

“That’s a bold statement. How do you know I won’t just rock your body with big nasty hooks before you can even try to kill me? huhh?” I said with my index finger poking his right arm.  

The man started to swat my hand away as I laughed and continued annoying the shit out of him. The car swerved a bit when I poked into his neck and cars behind us honked with frustration. Chanyeol grabbed control of the steering wheel with his left hand and pushed my face away from him with his other. “Ugh! Gross! This is your jerking off hand!” I yelled into his huge palm after remembering the scarring time I walked in on him while he was “in the zone” that night. I pushed his hand away from me roughly and let my disgust take over my features.  

“Give it a lick!” Chanyeol laughed out as he pushed his hand in my face again. I grabbed and bent it backward, making him wince and jerk it back to the steering wheel.  

“I don’t care how many times you wash your hands, that hand will always be dirty.” I said while rolling the window down so I can fix my hair in the rearview mirror.   

“Oh! We’re here! Finally.” Chanyeol yelled, surprised by the big and modern building. 

“You sure this is the place?” I said. I eyed it up and down with suspicion. I guess it would make sense for a rich lonely woman to work in a place like this, right? I pushed my way out of chanyeol’s car and put my hands on my hips, taking in the fresh air of the losers wasting their lives working in a place like this. I bet I make their whole paycheck in a day and all I have to do is be hot. Which is never hard for me. I smirked and sucked in air. My eyes wandered the streets hoping to catch some kind of attention. 

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm coming with your lunch. I just almost got in an accident. Some people were driving recklessl- ahh no, I'm not complaining. N-no im not making excuses, i jus- nevermind. Yes. I'm on my way.”

I watched a random girl rush out of her car trying to balance bags of food and cups of coffee while holding her phone to her ear using her shoulder. Her brown hair complimented her healthy dewy looking skin, and her hips filled out her grey bodycon mini skirt perfectly, cascading down into her smooth legs and her feet adorned in black heels. Her torso covered in a blazer matching her skirt and the dress shirt underneath is silk in a pretty cream white color. It took me a second to realize I was holding my breath and I grabbed my chest. She’s stunning for fuck sake. I gulped before I felt like the world was pulling me towards her. Today just got so much better.

“Nope.” Chanyeol grabbed my shoulder. Here we go again. 

“Not now, chanyeol.” I said swatting his hand away, feeling completely hypnotized. 

“Baekhyun, you always do this, please just-” I interrupted him with my hand on his face directing his eyes to the masterpiece standing just a few feet away. “Holy shit. She’s hot.” Chanyeol spoke under his breath. 

We both made our way over to her with our footsteps in sync. She huffed in frustration as she struggled to get everything she needed into her hands and when she threw her head back her phone fell to the ground. If this isn’t fate giving me a smooth entrance into her life I don’t what the fuck it is. I ran over to her and picked the phone up, checking to see if it was okay while also checking out her wallpaper for any boy or kids secretly. I flipped it around inspecting her case and then looked up at her. Finally, our eyes meet. “Your phone looks fine. Good thing you have this case. It’s pretty protective.” I said with a charming smile. I made sure to graze her hand when I gave her phone back. I hope it wasn’t just me that felt that spark when we touched. I gulped as a new and weird feeling shot me in the heart when she smiled back. “Thank you so much. I'm not usually this much of a mess, I promise.” Her eyes squinted while her small laugh filled my ears. Who the hell is this sent from heaven angel!?

“I’ll take your word for it. Let me help you.” 

“Thank you.” She said sweetly, picking up some of the bags herself.  

“I’ll help too!” Chanyeol barged through. He grabbed the bags from my hand in a hurry and smiled brightly. He looks like a complete idiot. 

She looked at him with wide eyes of confusion and then let out a forced laugh. “This is my big dumb friend, chanyeol. Despite his size, he wouldn't hurt a fly. so don’t worry about him.” I spoke with slight annoyance. 

“Hi.” He said softly, trying to charm her with his cute soft boy facade. My face scrunched slightly at him before turning back to the girl. “I'm baekhyun. Byun baekhyun.” Shit. I didn’t mean to say my name like that. I don’t want to come off as an asshole to her but that probably made me look like one. It’s just a really hard habit to kick. She laughed and held out her hand, “Well, you can call me serri. You guys are pretty funny.”

“Thanks. So where are we going with these?” I asked, holding out the bags im referring to. 

“Oh shit! I'm really late! Please follow me!” She yelled in a panic with a worried expression. She ran (which was really a speed walk thanks to her heels) toward the building me and chanyeol had intentions on entering after helping this girl. Maybe she’s going into the wrong building. “H-hey are you sure you’re in the right building?” I asked.

“Yes, I am.” She laughed. She took it as a complete joke. I looked at chanyeol nervously and he looked at me with wide eyes. I bit my lip as we walked past the desk on the first floor and took an elevator to the 27th floor of this 30-floor building. I have a feeling everything is going to go downhill from here. 

“Serri!” Some random guy ran towards her with a loving smile and I raised an eyebrow. Who is this cotton candy looking, kid? “Let me get those for you.” Me and him met eyes and he checked me out with suspicion. “Who are they?” He asked quietly, taking the bags from her.

“Oh! I met them outside of the building.” She said, still smiling. I handed her the bags in my hand carefully while making eye contact and smiling. I grazed her hand again and bit my lip. She looked up at me looking a bit nervous when my expression turned from friendly to touch me one more time and I might bust a nut. Nah, she actually doesn’t have to touch me, If she keeps looking up at me with those innocent eyes I might jus-

“Ehem!” The cotton candy boy fakely cleared his throat and serri snapped out of the trance I put her in but I kept my eyes on her. “And you are?” He asked in a slightly rude tone. “Byun baekhyun. Nice to meet you.” I said and held out my hand while still looking at serri. She smiled before a tiny giggle made it’s way out as she looked back at me. “I'm luhan!” The guy almost yelled as he slid in between me and her. “Nice to meet you too.”

“And, I'm chanyeol.” The big guy said as he handed the bags in his hand to luhan with an intimidating expression. He must be getting the same rude vibe I'm getting from this guy. Chanyeol threw his arm over my shoulder and I crossed mines. 

“Well, what the hell were you guys doing outside of this building? Loitering? Or just looking for women to help.” He said and put air quotes around the word help. 

“I’ll help your mom, asshole.” Chanyeol whispered under his breath.

“What?” Luhan asked.

“We work here!” I said interrupting them two.

“Really!? I’ve never seen you guys around.” Serri said, looking adorable and confused. 

Chanyeol looked at me with disappointment.

“That’s because they don’t.” Luhan said.

“We do. Well, we’re more like future partners of this company. We actually came here today for a meeting with the ceo Hopefully all goes well and we’ll start doing some real business with you all soon.”

“Oh wow. That’s awesome! So you’re, like, going to be here a lot then?” Serri asked looking into my eyes. Luhan gave me dirty looks after seeing the way she looks at me and I smirked a bit. 

“Well, yes. We’re going to be here for meetings as reps for our company. It’s called loey corp, you might have heard of it.” I said in a nonchalant tone. Chanyeol smacked the back of my head and I looked at him with a death stare.

“No, i never heard of it actually. But I never would have guessed that, seeing as you two are dressed like two casual pop idols or something.” Luhan said.

“Ahhh! That! Well, you know, it’s casual day at the office. so it couldn’t be helped!” I yelled before forcing a fake laugh and hitting chanyeol to make him join in. He dramatically screamed before stomping around and fake laughing to death. I looked at him in disgust before turning back to luhan and serri. “Well, we should get going.” I said with a smile. 

“Oh! Let me take you there!” Serri yelled excitedly.

“Y-you really don’t have to do thaaat.” I said with worry in my heart.

“I insist. Plus im already going there to give the ceo her lunch. That’s kind of my job. I only came here to give luhan his lunch” Serri pushed. A small smile was on my face as I watched her. How can I say no to that damn face? There’s just no way. 

“Well, what are you waiting for? Lead the way!” I said with enthusiasm. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“And this is the main office. Aka the big house, aka the ceo office.” Serri said, ending her cute little tour. “Good luck with your meeting.” She went to grab the door handle before I took a hold of her wrist. 

“Chanyeol you go ahead inside.” I spoke while staring at serri. Chanyeol looked between us before making a sound of frustration and grabbing the bags. 

“Is there something you need to tell me?” She looked up at me in confusion. The truth is I just wanted a few moments alone with her. Just to stare at her face. But now I have to think of something to say. “Well, I just wanted to say thank you for showing us around. It was sweet of you. I think I owe you a coffee now at least.” I said, giving her a charming smile.

“Hmm, sounds to me like you just want to take me out for coffee. Am I wrong?”

“I don’t know, Are you?” I teased.

“I hope not.” Serri bit her plump bottom lip, probably feeling like she was actually wrong about what she said. Despite that though, she still looked at me confidently. Those two feelings danced around her pretty face driving me to the sweetest kind of crazy. “You’re not.” I whispered.

“Excuse me!” I jumped and turned around to find a pissed off ms.yes. “Just why the hell are you so late, and why did you have someone else deliver the lunch I ordered you to get!?” 

“I'm so sorry, i-”

“There is no excuse. I have had it with your constant fuck ups. I had no idea taking on an intern would be so annoying!” 

I looked at serri as she kept her head held low. For some reason that sparked something in my stomach making me step in front of her. “It’s my fault. I was distracting her and told chanyeol to go in ahead with your lunch.”

“No, it’s alright baekhyun you don’t have to cover for her. She’s just a stupid 20 year old. Don’t try to save her. Go sort papers with the other secretaries. I can’t stand looking at you anymore.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Serri spoke meekly before walking away with her head still low. I looked back at ms.yes and she smiled. I can see through everything she just did and it makes me want to hit a woman for the first time in my life. I guess every now and then I have to remember she’s not just some old rich lady. There’s a venomous snake behind her fake personality. I guess this is the only time I cared enough to see it for how it is. Now that she’s involved. “Shall we eat now?” Ms.yes clapped her hands together with the same smile from before.  

“You did that on purpose didn’t you.” I said. Her face dropped to one of fake confusion before a sigh slipped through her lips. “Was it obvious?” She asked with her eyebrows furrowed. “Yes, it was. For a moment you felt less than so you established dominance and superiority by yelling at her. Tell me, do you feel better now? Do you feel like you’re back on top?” 

“So what? You never cared before if I was a little feisty. Why does it matter right now?” Ms.yes looked at me trying to find the reason behind my words and my expression. “What is it? It’s not like she can do anything for you so why care about her. I don’t recall you ever being this way. Not for anyone other than chanyeol at least.” I looked away from her. It’s not like she’s wrong. Our eyes locked again and I took a deep breath, my chest feeling heavier than before. “Ms.yes, I can understand why that’s all you think I care about. If someone can pay me, if someone can help me get somewhere. But I still don’t want to see someone innocent get chastised for my own urges. None of it was her fault. You owe her an apology.”

She scoffed and ran a hand through her perfect bob. “My apologies only go to you. I’m sorry for not being clear that you are just a young boy I fuck for fun. You have no say in what I should do or not. Now, now, baekhyun. Don’t get uppity just because you’re getting a little more money than you’re used to these days. Remember this, your job is to sit and be pretty. You’re my arm candy. Not my guilty conscious. Please act accordingly.” 

This goddamn bitch. “Well, this arm candy has lost his appetite. I’ll take a rain check on lunch. I think im going to grab my chanyeol and go for the day. It was nice meeting up like this. We should totally do it again sometime.” I said with a small forced smile. Going off on her isn’t on my agenda today. Plus, doing that would make me seem ten times less attractive. I could lose her as a client. Which is not what I want. Yah boi lives a pretty expensive lifestyle, I'm not willing to change that. I reached behind her closing most of the space between us to make her heart race for me one more time before I go. “Chanyeol, let’s-” I cut myself off after I pushed open the door to the office and found chanyeol basically dry humping the client ms.yes has over. 

“On second thought, you can keep him.” I said before slamming the door.

“Why would you agree to another lunch date!? If I was you I would have told her to fuck all the way off a cliff!” Chanyeol yelled as he slammed the door of his car. I did the same but less rough while laughing. “Dude, I'm serious! How could she talk to you like that? You’re the supplier, she’s the one in demand. It’s not fair for her to treat you like you need her more!” the big man moved about dramatically to emphasize his words. 

“Yeah, yeah. But I chose not to care. Why lose my biggest client over something small that she already apologized for. Even if I can replace her quickly.” I said, stretching my arms and taking in the fresh air. “Besides, I have other reasons for wanting to come back and having some lunch.” Thoughts of seeing serri again filled my mind. I admit I have a bit of a crush already, but I won’t get ahead of myself, because I could say the same for a few other girls that didn’t let me fuck them upon introduction. Which is not a large number of women. But the weird thing about serri is as much as I want to get in her pants I want to get in her head, see what she’s thinking, get to know her. You know, the cheesy stuff. 

Me and chanyeol entered the building and passed the front desk security without a hassle. We heard people whisper about how handsome we were every time someone passed us and I smirked. Going with a suit today was such a good idea. Not only because I have to keep my lie going with serri, but because I just look so damn good. Someone arrest me. I heard a sweet voice call out for me to hold the elevator when chanyeol and I stepped on. Chanyeol put his hand out in front of the doors and I looked out to see who it is. My eyes found a rushing serri running towards us. “Hurry!” I said loudly, beaming at her cutely. I can’t help but smile if she's going to look that adorable when she runs.  Serri ran into the elevator before relief spread across her face. “Oh! Heyyy, guysss! I didn't even realize it was you. Nice suits. Looks like it’s all business today, huh?” 

“It always is. Late for lunch again?” Chanyeol asked after letting the elevator doors close.

“Not this time, but I do have to get these papers up to the other secretaries asap, or else they’ll rip me a new one. It’s not my fault they’re all late on their paperwork, but, hey, it’s what interns do.” She said while nodding.

“Well, we’ll be happy to help you, if you need it.” I said, still smiling.

“Oh no, I learned my lesson. But thank you for the offer.”

My smile dropped and I looked away. What does that mean? Is she going to watch herself around me now? All because of yesterday? “Well, what if it wasn’t just an offer. What if I insisted?” I asked in all seriousness. I won’t let what happened yesterday come between us. Serri looked up at me and pursed her lips, trying to find words to say. Before she could though, the elevator bell sounded off and she snapped her head to the door. “I-i have to get off here. Luhan has some papers for me.” She said before trying to walk off. I stepped in front of her and she bumped into me, papers first. The work in her arms folded at the ends while they pushed up against me and I smirked. 

“You seriously don’t think im going to leave you alone right?”

“I-”

“Chanyeol, grab the papers, I’ll have my hands full.” I slid my arm over serri’s shoulders and gave her a playful smile. “I think I need another tour of the place.”

We walked into the 27th floor like that and I caught that guy luhan giving us the evil eye from afar. There’s no way this guy is her boyfriend but he really could fool me if I didn’t know any better. “It’s you two again.” He said in a sassy tone while eyeing my arm that’s around serri’s shoulders. “Thanks for the very warm greeting.” I voiced quietly. Chanyeol dumped the papers in luhan’s smaller arms and he got dragged down a bit by the sudden weight. “Yah! I could have a paper cut now!” Luhan almost yelled at chanyeol. I stifled a laugh and so did serri before chanyeol gave luhan a pat on the head. “I can kiss it better if you want.” Chanyeol teased. Luhan rudely eyed him up and down then walked off as if he’s just been disrespected in the worst way. Which is understandable. 

“Baekhyu, we should go” Chanyeol said with a fading amused smile. I nodded and turned to serri. “When are you going to give me your number so I won’t have to continue interfering with your work. Don’t get me wrong though, I could definitely do this all day.” She giggled at my words and put her index finger on her bottom lip in fake contemplation. “Well, I guess I do want that coffee you owe me. But I don’t know if I want you to stop interfering. You annoying me at work is making it more bearable.” She said with a teasing smile. 

“Im annoying, huh? Girl, you haven’t seen shit yet.” 

“Oh yeah, he can be much worse.” Chanyeol interrupted quickly. 

Serri laughed and nodded her head. “Fine, I’ll give you my number if that means I get to be annoyed more.”

“Of course it does. I’ll even annoy you with the details of a cute little coffee shop we can meet up at.” 

She laughed again and smacked my chest, letting it sit there. “I'm looking forward to it already.” I grabbed her hand and looked into her eyes. This would be the moment we kiss. When I give a girl this look she never resists. Serri’s cheeks flushed a bit and she moved her stare to the hand im holding to my chest. I stepped closer and licked my lips. I’ve been wanting to do this since I first laid eyes on her mouth. 

“What are you doing?” She asked in actual confusion. The same emotion filled me when I snapped out of it. Shit, this is so embarrassing. I looked around with my face still close to hers and started flicking imaginary dirt off her blazer. “Ahh ahah! so dirty. I was just cleaning off your blazer. I saw some stuff there....” I spoke nervously while backing away. “Ohhh. Thanks, I guess!” She said, obviously forcing that cute laugh out. “I thought for a second you were trying to kiss me.” She scratched her head with smiling eyes. 

“Nooo, we just met. I would never.” I said. I'm such a liar. A good looking one though. “Well, I have a meeting. I’ll catch you at the coffee place later?” I asked casually to see if I didn’t just scare her into not liking me.

“It’s a date!” She spoke excitedly while she walked the other way, beaming at me with flushed cheeks. I watched her walk away and grabbed my chest in relief that it’s over. “Real smooth, my guy.” Chanyeol said, patting my shoulder. “You really outdid yourself on that one.” I punched him in the arm and turned around to the elevator. If I don’t get off this floor right now, I’ll scream. 

“Baekhyun!” I heard a stern voice call for me before I could take another step and my shoulders slumped. Who the fuck. I heard heels click closer to me before I turned around once more to lay my eyes on an aggravated ms.yes and some workers following her, struggling to keep up with her pace. “Ahh, you’re here?” I formed a question out of nervousness and giggled. 

“What are you doing down here?” Her lips were tight when she asked. 

“Someone’s big mad.” Chanyeol whispered under his breath. 

“I was just, you know, looking around. You got a nice building around here!” I spoke loudly before some fake laughing bubbled up in my chest. She just stared at me with upset eyes, making me halt my actions. She sighed and nodded after eyeing me up and down. Her mature hand waved up and backward as a sign to the people behind her to scatter. “I had to finish some work on this floor but I'm done now. Come, let’s get some food in that body.” She said softly. 

“Did you get enough to eat?” Ms.yes asked with her hand rubbing my thigh. 

“Yes. thank you for it all. It was delicious.” I slid her hand off my thigh and smiled. I’ve decided to punish her for her behavior yesterday by cutting off any skinship. Then once she in that craving dick state she gets in, I’ll make her beg. It’s an easy set up since she’s so predictable. Predictable, boring, and horny. It’s sad how she chases after thrills but is still boring as shit. But maybe it’s because I have this newfound dislike for her. Probably both.

She looked at me with a frown and then grabbed her cup of green tea. I bet it's bitter like her dark soul. “Well, I have to get back to my office now. It was nice to eat lunch with you guys. Especially my yeolie.” The lady that’s one of chanyeol’s regulars tickled under his chin lovingly and he giggled like a school girl. I swallowed down my throw up before scoffing. “It was nice eating with you too, noona!” Chanyeol spoke in a cute way, making me stifle my laughter. I think I could actually die from watching this any longer. Ms.yes, on the other hand, looked at them as if it was the best couple she ever laid her eyes on. Which is to be expected from her. 

The lady got up and chanyeol followed her like a puppy as he grabbed her hand. He picked up her bag while she waved at ms.yes, both of them walking out wearing smiles as if they’re in love. He really is something else around that old hag. I guess that’s apart of the game though. I sighed when I leaned into the modern couch placed in the middle of the office, sitting right next to the coffee table, that’s now all dirty with the remains of the food we ate. I wonder who cleans that up....probably the janitor. “Baekhyun, you’re dismissing my advances.” Ms.yes broke the silence with a confused tone. I looked at her and pursed my lips. “Yeah, i am.” I spoke nonchalantly because that’s how I was feeling. 

“Baekhyun. I said sorry for the way I acted already yesterday. What more do I have to do? huh? Do you want another car? Do you want to go on a trip?” She asked desperately. Her eyes are hungry as her body creeps closer to me. I almost smirked but caught myself before it happened. This will always be my favorite emotion any of my clients show me. This desperation, this desire to do anything for me. The woman of the upper echelon melting like ice in my hands. It feels better than sex, sometimes. “Baekhyun, answer me. What do I have to do?” I finally let a smirk slip before turning to face her and loosening my tie. 

“I guess another car will do.” I said with a pout.

“Consider it done. Now, come here.” She said, grabbing my tie to pull me closer. If this was anyone else I would have gotten a boner by now. Let’s hope I can get it up today because for some reason she’s looking extra unattractive. I let her kiss me and unbutton my shirt. Her hands spread around my chest when she finally exposed it from the dress shirt it was hiding under. If I don’t start putting in some passion right now she’ll get upset. So, here we go.

“Knock, knock! It’s time for me to clean up your lunc-”

I paused my movements when a sweet voice barged in. “Serri!” I turned around in surprise. 

“I'm sorry!” The door shut after she yelled her apology. Shit. Shit. Shit. I pulled away from ms.yes in a rush. I tried hard to button my shirt back up before I went after serri but ms.yes gripped my arm, her polished in black nails dug into my wrist before I turned to look her way. “Where the hell do you think you’re going.” Her voice low and scary. “You think I didn’t see you two on the 27th floor? Making googly eyes at each other? Don’t play this game, baekhyun. You want your car, don’t you?” Her grip tightening with every word. 

For a second I wanted to stay. For a second my selfish side kicked in. Who is she? Why should I care? But my heart can’t take it. I don’t know why I feel like I will regret it for the rest of my life if I don’t go after her. I can’t leave her alone. I ripped my wrist from ms.yes in a hurry, rushing to the door. 

“Wait! D-don’t leave.” She yelled. “I’ll make her life as my intern a living hell.”

I bit my lip. “Darling, since when did you become so weak?” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Serri! Serri!” I ran towards her as she opened her car door. “Serri, please! Wait!” The girl ignored me and slammed her driver side door, starting her car without any hesitation. I wasn’t thinking when I jumped in front of the vehicle. I stretched my arms out to completely block her. “Serri, It’s not what it looks like! It's complicated, and I can’t just explain it right away like this. But please, don’t run away from me.”

“Move, byun baekhyun!” 

“Serri, listen! I'm a piece of shit, I know! I don’t give a fuck about anyone other than myself, and chanyeol. All I do is chase money and pleasure, and I have such a big ego that pointing these things out to you makes me want to punch a wall! But this is me trying my best to show you how far I will go. I will do anything, anything, just to get to know you better! Serri, just give me a chance.” 

She turned off her car before getting out. Her steps, quick, as she walked over to me. She got close to me and on instinct, I began to back away. Her face getting closer to mine with a blank expression. “One chance. Just one.” Serri said with reluctance. “Only because I'm interested in what might happen next with you.” A sigh of relief rushed through my lips. I don’t know what this feeling is, I don’t know why I can’t let her walk out of my life.....but I know that if she did, I would regret it for a long time. 

“Thank you, serri. I won’t take this chance for granted. Be prepared to be swept off your feet, girl!” I said, finally smiling.

“We’ll see about that.” Her tone was serious but her face was teasing as she looked at me.

“I'm serious! I’ll be the prince charming of your dreams.” I bent my legs to be the same size as her, looking into her eyes with a grin.

 “I don’t know what's happening, but keep going.” Chanyeol whispered out of nowhere. I darted my eyes to him and dropped my smile before I heard serri’s small nervous laughter in my left ear. “Fuck off.” I whispered through tight lips at chanyeol. He smirked and threw his arm around my shoulders. “I have to admit, you two would make a great couple. I mean, he looks like he’s already in love.” 

Serri raised her eyebrows and nodded her head as she took note of chanyeol’s words. “Love at first sight maybe?” She asked me teasingly.

“I think I’ll plead the fifth on that one.” 

[trashxqueen]

Friends to Lovers (Richie Tozier x reader)

Request - Hello lovely! I just read your headcannon about dating Richie Tozier and it was sooooo cute! I loved it! Could you do an imagine about a friends to lovers with Richie? Like maybe they’re in high school and they’re both pining after each other but they don’t know the feeling is mutual so the losers set them up on a blind date and they both (Richie mostly) get all blushy and cute? Thank you sooo much and I hope you have a wonderful day! 💕

(A/n) Thank you!! I tried my best but I still haven’t written a lot of fanfiction so it’s kinda crappy sorry. I tried to write Bill’s stutter as best I could but I didn’t really know how so I hope it’s okay. Also I turned into a thing where like the reader doesn't know who shes going on a date with but Richie does, I’m sorry im terrible at this lmao.

(n/n - nickname)

y/n’s pov

Since day one, Richie Tozier and I have been the best of friends. We’ve done everything together and it’s always so much fun, between our weekly Saturday movie nights to waiting till the last possible moment to do science projects. He taught me how to play videos and ride a bike. We are inseparable.

The only problem is, I’ve been in love with him the entire time. Even though we aren’t together, he’s always made me feel special and happy. The only person that knew of my crush was my close friend Beverly Marsh.

“n/n you need to tell him how you feel! You obviously both love each other, he’s just too shy to say anything,” Beverly said sitting on her bed while you sat on her floor.

“Really Bev, Richie? Too shy? Literally two weeks ago in lunch he stood up on a chair and screamed the chorus of “Total Eclipse of the Heart” cause Eddie dared him to, he’s not too shy to do anything he just doesn’t like me like that.”

“You’re full of shit y/n but fine. If you truly believe he doesn’t like you then whatever. But I can’t stand to see you upset so I’m gonna set you up on a blind date tonight.”

“Please don’t, I’m perfectly happy ignoring my problems and also tonight is my movie night with Richie.”

Beverly rolled her eyes, “You can miss it just once, he’ll understand, please y/n, I won’t stop bothering you about this.”

“Fine! But I’m not going to like it and if he tries anything I will punch him.”

“That’s my girl! Now let’s go pick out some nice clothes for later.”

…

Third person pov

Richie sat at home thinking about what he was going to do without y/n tonight. He’d just gotten a call from her saying she was going to have to miss movie night because she was going on a date; he was upset. He had been in love with her for so long but never thought she loved him back so he always kept quiet about it.

The doorbell began to ring so he went up to answer it given he was the only one home. As he opened the door, Bill, Ben and Eddie walked in and immediately began talking.

“Okay so you’re gonna take her to that Diner on Ford street and what the hell are you wearing you’re not wearing sweatpants on a date what is wrong with you-” Eddie began ranting before Richie cut him off.

“Eddie what the fuck are you talking about, I’m not going on a date with anyone I don’t even like anyone.”

“B-bullshit Richie, e-everyone knows you’ve liked y-y/n for f-forever,” Bill retorted, “A-also we’ve arranged for y-you to go on a date w-with y/n tonight.”

“Yeah but she doesn’t know it’s you, it’s gonna be a surprise, Bev planned it,” Ben stated.

“No, there’s no way I’m doing this! She doesn’t even like me, there’s no point and I’m just gonna embarrass myself and she’ll end up hating me,” Richie protested.

“Yeah well tough shit Richie. Beverly told Bill she liked you and she’s already agreed to the date. It doesn’t matter that she doesn’t know it’s you, she’ll be so happy when she sees you! You have to agree, how’s she gonna feel when she gets there and no one else is there huh? She’ll feel like shit, you have to go, you both have been pining after each other for years now so you’re going, end of story.” Eddie stated before walking into Richie’s room to look at the clothes in his closet.

“Fine, but if she hates me after this, this is on you guys,” Richie finally agreed walking into his room.

Ben and Bill smiled at each other before following Richie, getting him ready for later tonight.

…

y/n’s pov

“Oh my god n/n you look so cute!” Beverly exclaimed smiling.

I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled. ( http://pic-collage.com/_tJGdT93e ) I did look pretty but I’d rather be wearing sweatpants and sitting next to Richie binge watching movies together. There was one time he put his arm around me and I melted.

“Thanks Bev, but do I have to do this?”

“Damn right you do. Just trust me I promise you’ll love it.”

I rolled my eyes and signed, “Fine, let’s go.”

…

No one’s pov

Beverly and y/n pulled into the parking lot of the dinner and y/n got out nervously.

“Remember he’s wearing black dress pants, a white button up shirt, black tie and he has glasses,” Beverly said, “Have fun girly!”

y/n walked into the diner looking at all the tables looking for her “mystery date” until she settled on a familiar face.

“Richie is that you, why are you here?” She said looking at her best friend.

Richie looked up nervously blushing with some red roses in his hand.

“H-hey y/n, you look beautiful and I am here as your date,” he stared at y/n blushing furiously.

She looked at him in shock before smiling and sitting across from him.

“These are for you,” Richie said handing her the roses.

“Thanks Rich but, what’s going on?”

“Well,” Richie looked down at the table before continuing, “I really like you y/n, actually I think, wait no, I know I love you and I have been in love with you for forever. I-I guess Bill and Beverly knew and wanted to set us up. And oh my fuck you really do look so pretty tonight holy shit. You’re so kind and smart and funny and I’ve never loved anyone before but I know I love you. You- you’re my world and-”

y/n cut him off by placing her hand on his and looked at him softly.

“Rich, calm down you sound like Bill, I love you too and I’m so fucking happy to hear you feel the same, I’ve loved you since the day I met you,” y/n stared into his eyes before glancing down to his lips.

He looked back at her and began to smile before leaning in placing his lips on her own. It was a gentle soft kiss, that made the two of them melt.

“n/n will you be my girl?” Richie asked after pulling away.

“Of course I would,” she replied.

“Oh hell yeah!”

Richie and y/n looked across the diner to see Beverly, Ben, Eddie and Bill sitting together staring at the new couple. Eddie face was extremely red realizing he just blew the four’s cover and they all got up and ran out of the diner.

The couple returned their gazes to each other before laughing.

“Well this is a great start to a first date,” said the boy.

“It certainly is,” y/n replied lacing her fingers with Richie’s smiling softly at her new lover. The blushing couple leaned back in for another kiss before spending the night together.

[keelywolfe]

FIC: Pick Up and Put Down

Summary: It’s another day at the Embassy. Edge is accustomed to getting texts from a number of people but not quite like this.

Tags: Spicyhoney, Established Relationship, Flirting, Undertale Monsters on the Surface, Prejudice Against Monsters, Threats of Violence, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Hurt/Comfort

Warning: This chapter has a reference to suicide. It is NOT, I repeat, NOT any character from any Undertale universe. It is also NOT any of my OC’s that you may have grown to know and love. No one that has made an appearance anywhere before, okay? That said, if you find a reference to suicide triggering or upsetting, skip this one.

part of the ‘by any other name’ 

Read it on AO3

or

Read it here!

~~*~~

The first text came only a few minutes after Edge arrived at work. He parked in the secure lot, walking through the side gate that led to the main entrance without taking him past the protestors. Distantly, he heard the rising shouts as they caught sight of him and if he bothered to glance in their direction, he would see them waving their signs. For Humans who claimed they were concerned for the safety of their children, they didn’t seem particularly worried about them seeing their hate-filled rhetoric and vulgar demands. Edge ignored them. He was too far away to even make out what they were shouting, much less for them to harm him even if they could, and he doubted they would make an attempt. Janice had been an easy target for their hatred and as much as he knew it would only make things worse in the long run, something ruthless at his core wished they would try him. It wouldn’t teach them anything about love, but the part of him that would never leave Underfell behind thought they could use a lesson about LV. The chime of his phone distracted him from those thoughts and Edge paused in the lobby to check it. if you were a juice, you’d be fineapple Unwillingly, a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. A little charming ridiculousness from Stretch was more than welcome this morning and instead of answering, Edge only noted that the message had been read. Partly because he had no affection for emoticons and partly because Stretch would be aggravated by it. An aggravated Stretch was by far the most entertaining and it was going to be a long day. He could use the promise of playful harassment. With a short nod to the security guard, Edge scanned his ID badge and made his way to the third floor. Janice was already at her desk, typing furiously when he walked in. “Good morning,” she said briskly, barely glancing up from the screen. “You have a meeting in an hour, I left the informational packet on your desk.” “Thank you,” Edge told her crisply. He left her to her work and went on to his office to prepare. Before the door was even closed, his phone chimed again. are you a banana? because i find you ap-peeling With a head shake, Edge put his phone back in his pocket and hung up his coat. Next to the folder there was already a cup of coffee waiting, steam wafting gently. That was the benefit of always being prompt, it gave his assistant the foresight of knowing when to get coffee. Two pages into the report, he was a hell of a lot more grateful for the coffee. This meeting was going to be thrilling, he could already tell. An hour and a half later, Edge was damning himself for being proven right, listening to the presenter droning away. Even Papyrus, who was sitting on the other side of the table with the other diplomats, had to jerk his head up when it started to bob drowsily. Edge was thinking idly of sending for a pot of coffee for the room when his phone buzzed. He never turned it off anymore, not after the attack on New New Home, and no one gave him so much as a glance as he discreetly checked the message. i know you’re busy today, but can you add me to your to-do list? This time, his smile almost broke free. It was an effort to school his expression to attentiveness, staring at the PowerPoint with polite interest. Another half hour dragged by, but his phone stayed unfortunately silent, and in the end, a round of coffee was brought for everyone. It almost helped. It wasn’t until he was back at his desk, his lunch set out so that he could eat while he worked, that his phone chimed again. He took a bite of his Greek couscous salad before he looked at the text, savoring the rich flavors. Absently, he wondered what Stretch was having for lunch; there were plenty of options in the refrigerator to choose from, even if he usually preferred simpler, often greasier, fare. baby if you were words on a page, you’d be what they call fine print His smile was reluctant, but it was there even after he finished eating. Throughout the day, the texts came. While he was talking to Antwan about an upcoming court case regarding Monsters rights in private businesses— are you an astronomer? because i want you to study this heavenly body When he got a cup of coffee from the lounge to help him get through the afternoon, already thinking longing thoughts towards the Beanery’s reopening and being able to get his preferred coffee beans again— if you were a chicken, you’d be im-peck-able And during his brief meeting with Asgore to discuss the construction of a new Embassy that was being planned in California and housing requirements for the Monsters who were in need of warmer climes. if nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing? It was close to the time he normally left that his phone finally rang, and Edge answered it, already anticipating a flood of puns and ridiculous lines to carry him home. “babe?” Stretch said and Edge stiffened instantly at the shakiness in that single word. “What’s wrong?” he asked sharply. There was a quavering breath on the other end of the line, and Stretch asked, “have you seen the news at all?” “No, I’ve been in my office. Hold on.” He started pulling up the local news on his laptop, but Stretch hadn’t stopped, his voice low and trembling, “they caught him. i mean, they didn’t really catch him, they found him.” “Found who?” Edge was scrolling, scanning the webpage, trying to find what had him so upset. He saw it at the same moment Stretch blurted out, “the guy! the guy who burned down the beanery. it…it’s the same guy from the bus. the one who…who attacked me.” It was. Edge recognized him from police report, the court documents, and the one time he’d seen him in person. There was nothing remarkable about him, only a middle-aged Human, and Edge couldn’t see into the souls of others, couldn’t see their sins. This Human kept his hatred hidden beneath a veneer of civility, invisible at a glance to most. It didn’t matter, Edge could sense his LV even without a Check. This man had hurt plenty of others before Monsters had even stepped from beneath the mountain. He remembered seeing this Human in court when Antwan was defending Jeff after the attack on the bus. He’d been there as the injured party, claiming he’d been the one attacked. Edge had no doubt that was exactly what he believed. To him, Monsters had attacked simply by existing and Stretch being in his space was nothing short of an assault. He usually enjoyed watching Antwan in a courtroom as he calmly and ruthlessly disassembled the arguments of the other side. Edge hadn’t stayed that day, wanting to be as far from that Human as possible. For the Human’s protection, not his own. The mental picture of him trying to strike Stretch for the simple act of being made his own LV stir in uncomfortable ways. And now according to the news article, he was dead. “the police aren’t saying much yet,” Stretch rushed out, something close to panic lacing his words. “but...but…there’s plenty of rumors online. so far they’re saying it looks like a suicide. edge, they’re saying he had a plan to plant a bomb in the embassy, they—" “Shh, calm down,” Edge soothed, reading with narrowed eyes, even as he typed a quick message to the Intel team. He wanted information about this, and he wanted it now. Stretch’s breathing was too quick, his voice thick and hoarse, and more than a little unsteadily . “i know you guys have great security and everything, i mean, your brother is usually on this shit. Fuck, i’m surprised he wasn’t already.” A trickle of coldness ran down Edge’s spine at the mention of his brother, like tiny icicles prickling up his vertebra. “Suicide…” Edge murmured, reading through the news article avidly. It wasn’t possible that the police had released this much information so quickly, Intel would need to see if they could root out their source. “yeah,” Stretch swallowed hard enough that Edge heard the dry click through the line. “i guess his landlady found him, said he hung himself. left a note and everything.” Edge was sure that he had, and a detailed one at that. “he had a bunch of anti-monster stuff, they found his plans for the arson at the beanery. and his note mentioned the embassy, but…but…why would he kill himself before he did it, that doesn’t make sense, does it? i mean, i haven’t seen the note but, babe, what if he tried something, what if there is something there, what if—" “He couldn’t have gotten onto the grounds without being detected,” Edge reminded him, still reading. “We’ve got plenty of magic and technology preventing it.” Stretch exhaled rattlingly loud. “yeah. yeah, i know, i get it, i was just worried, you know? this is all so much happening, and it had to be this guy, didn’t it, why the fuck couldn’t he just leave us alone, we never did anything to him and—” his voice broke, faltering. That attack on the bus had shaken Stretch badly at the time and now he was trapped reliving it, only to discover the perpetrator had stolen more from him than he could have possibly guessed. “I’m coming home,” Edge told him abruptly. Listening to this, knowing Stretch was dealing with it alone, was growing too painful; he could work from home if needs be. “what? no, i’m okay.” To his relief, Stretch calmed a little at that, breathing deeply. “andy is on his way over, he’s kind of shaken, too. he knew the guy from court and he ain’t crying over him, but it’s still fucked up, yeah? stay there, you’ve probably got a ton of things to do now that this shitshow is starting up.” He did, he would, but leaving Stretch to deal with this on his own, even with Jeff at his side, did not sit well. “Are you sure?” “yeah, yeah, we’ll watch some movies or something, spend the night chilling out. babe? be careful, okay? just…be careful.” “I promise,” Edge said softly. A message was beeping through on his phone, but Edge ignored it for a moment. “holding you to that. i love you.” “I love you, too.” He hung up and sat back in his chair, pressing the hard case of the phone against his forehead for a long moment. Then he looked at the message. It was from Red and Edge felt his soul pulse once, one white-hot flareup of LV, as he read it. why did the man trapped in the burning house start swinging a baseball bat? because three strikes and you’re out. For one brief second everything was too hot, his vision wavering. Then Edge let out a long, slow breath, flexing his hands as he took back control. First, he deleted his brother’s text. Their cell phones ran through Monster servers and until Humans had access to magic, they were unhackable by any of their means. It was nothing more than a ridiculous joke, no reason to keep it and that was exactly what he would say if he were asked. He wouldn’t be, the chances were infinitesimal, but Edge preferred to be prepared for anything, including near impossibilities. That done, Edge silently opened one of his file cabinets and took out a thick folder, filled with reports. They were all written by his brother in a language that very few Monsters could read. He honestly wasn’t sure if Stretch was one of them. There was nothing truly incriminating in them. Edge had read them all and while they stated some of Red’s suspicions, he hadn’t been able to prove anything concrete, certainly not enough to take to the fickle Ebott police. He pushed them through the shredder, anyway, meticulously. Five sheets at a time and watched as the cross blades turn them into confetti. Chances were that no one would ask him any awkward questions. But if they did, Edge could in all honesty say he didn’t know anything. This was nothing more than plausible deniability coupled with healthy caution and it was nothing but the truth that Edge didn’t know anything. He could look his husband in the face and repeat that truth. He could. There were lines he wouldn’t, couldn’t cross, not even for his brother. When he was finished, Edge went back to his desk and got to work. He was going to be here very late, messages were already pouring in and he could hear Janice’s phone continually ringing. There would need to be press releases and statements despite the fact that Monsters had not been involved. It would be officially ruled suicide eventually, Edge had no doubt. The Security team would need to assess the threat as well; as confident as he was in their security measures, arrogance was a quick path to catastrophe. Before he could begin opening the multiple messages and emails that were pouring in, Edge caught sight of the darkened screen on his phone and hesitated. He picked it up, his fingers resting briefly on the screen, and then quickly he typed a message. How can other people love when I'm using the world's supply on you? He pressed send quickly before he could second guess and set his phone aside. Out of the corner of his vision, he saw a flurry of emoticons explode across the screen , an eye-searing expression of delight and affection. Stretch was all right, Jeff would be there soon. He wasn’t alone and he was safe in their home, and when Edge finally returned, he would be able to kiss him, hold him, with nothing between them. He could. The ring on his third finger was a comforting weight as Edge got to work.

-finis-

[skamfairy]

Harry Potter and The Philosopher’s Stone Movie - Thoughts after watching for the first time

AHHHH I FINALLY WATCHED IT, this is hella long so i’m gonna jump right in but also if you are curious but can’t be bothered to read this much just scroll down to the end to read a short paragraph on my overall thoughts ashjhjsa HERE WE GO

OKAY SO opening credits are rolling and i’m FINE but then THIS SHOT opens the movie and i’m losing my shit

I legit started giggling uncontrollably and my heart started racing because it finally hit me THAT I WAS FINALLY SEEING IT ALL ON SCREEN like it’s happening and the vibe really hit me right then THE PRIVET DRIVE SIGN THE OWL ALL OF IT this opening felt SO GOOD it felt so right because the first sentence in the book is about the dursley’s living on privet drive and the owl and the music just give it that instant ominous magic vibe i love it i love it 

and then we get this bloody shot of cat McGonagall

and we watch Miss McGonagall LITERALLY TRANSFORM FROM CAT TO WOMAN THROUGH THE SHADOW ON THE WALL

AND it’s honestly the coolest thing i’ve ever seen i seriously loved this and i’m SO SO SO GLAD THEY KEPT THIS IN IT REALLY KICKS OF THE MAGIC like for me this really made me go “YES YES YES YES YES WE’RE HERE WE’RE DOING THIS” and from an artsy POV, it was just honestly a beautiful and cool shot. 

THEN THE TITLE

i’m sorry but I’VE GOT to talk about this right now so i don’t have to address it again but like THIS TITLE REALLY FUCKING HYPES YOU UP seriously, the music the lightning ALL OF IT it’s so loud and compelling and it makes you so excited. if you aren’t one to get hyped up by street signs and cats turning into women like me, then THIS will hype you up GURANTEED i’m in love with it i felt the chill go through my body RAIN STARTED POURING OUT MY WINDOW!! (i’m not lying you can ask my friend as my witness she knows cos i bragged about it several times during the stream sahsahj) anyway just saying IT MAKES YOU READY FOR MAGIC

I’m gonna put a keep reading here because we’re just getting started and this is gonna be long as hell so enjoy if you keep reading and bye angel! if you’re not shjjhas

anyway the light of our lives wakes up in his closet and i am THIS close to calling child protective services and get him outta there but,,,,,,,you know, we got a movie to watch. 

Dudley is bloody horrible, but then his dad literally threatens harry with car keys so we’ve got bigger fish to complain about i guess

WE GO TO THE ZOOO! (YAAAAY)

and can i just say my fave part of this isn’t just the fact that the snake NODS when harry starts talking to it (although it’s high up there) but when instead of freaking out and going hOLY SHIT I CAN TALK TO SNAKES??? WHATS THAT ABOUT??? he just says very thoughtfully “i’ve never talked to a snake before” sjhashjasjh i love this kid i swear i’m sahjhjsa best kid to find out he’s a wizard honestly. he doesn’t blink an eyelid shashjahjs 

Dudley gets thrown overboard into the enclosure and when the snake says thanks to harry as he slithers on by, harry replies with a sly “anytime” like sure just call me whenever you need me to throw my cousin into an inhabited enclosure at the zoo, mate, i’m your man. sjhahjsah i love this i just,,,,,i really love this kid.

HARRY GETS HIS LETTER! (i love this shot)

and uncle vernon loses the plot and can i just say, how bloody boring you’ve got to be to hate magic? like can you imagine? i think harry seems to agree with me, judging by his cold hard side eye at uncle vernon nailing the mail box shut

seriously i love him so much (drink everytime i gush about harry, ya gonna get hammered ;) ) 

finally Harry makes a wish on his birthday and in return he gets a hagrid breaking down his door and telling him he’s a wizard.

IM A WHAT

Hagrid and harry hit up diagon alley and please let me spend a second to GUSH over the beauty of this set?? i’m just WOW like it amazes me how much work must have gone into this movie and it truly paid off. like it’s so so so gorgeous and not just the set, but the music in this scene and the whole vibe of it is so positive and magical and it truly gave me such a warm feeling in my belly im just im so in awe. okay okay i’ll shut up sahjsajh 

Harry finds out he’s rich, gets traumatised by the man giving him his wand which i must say WAS SUCH A COOL SCENE LIKE IT WAS SO FUN SEEING HIM TRY OUT THE DIFFERENT WANDS AND THEN HOW HE LITERALLY LIGHTS UP AND THE WIND BLOWS WHEN HE FINDS HIS BROTHER WAND IM it was sooooo cool AND he gets given hedwig by hagrid ❤️ YAY

im sorry i’m literally crying sajhhjsa at hagrid deadass abandoning harry at the train station it’s so funny sahjjhsa poor harry THANKFULLY he finds my fave family in the world because Mrs Weasley is basically shouting MUGGLES ashjahsj (best way to spot a wizard asjhasjh) and then I LOSE MY SHIT BECAUSE

FRED AND GEORGE FRED AND GEORGE FRED AND GEORGE IM LIVING I LOVE THEM SO MUCH “he’s not fred! I AM” “honestly woman you call yourself our mother” “I’m only joking, i am fred” sahjsahjhjsahjas ICONIC THEY MAKE ME SO HAPPY IM SO HAPPY TO SEE THEM HELP IM SO ASHJSAJHHJASHJAS you guys know how i feel about them im just AHHHH

also i need to add that I LOVE MRS WEASLEY!!!! she’s casted SO SO SO WELL so much better than i would have ever imagined this actress is so warm and motherly and she’s just perfect she’s truly perfect for mrs weasley im so so so happy with her ❤️

WE GET TO THE TRAIN

love this shot, so beautiful and magical and poignant i’m feeling so many things right now 

RON AND HARRY MEET AND I LOVE THEM they are so pure my angels 💖 hermione shows up and I ABSOLUTELY LOVE HER like all three of them play it so so so well its so funny and watching it gives me nothing but warm feels THEY ARE SO CUTE and the facial expressions all around are amazing im in love with the trio 💖

Draco tries to befriend harry and harry SASSES HIM and it’s glorious, dumbledore welcomes us to hogwarts and tells the kids that they’ll die a painful death if they go the the third corridor and this is their response

sajhshjsajhasjh 

sorting happens, its AWESOME but not in alphabetical order ashjsajh seriously its such a fun scene i love (every scene is fun) the hat barely touches dracos head and says he’s slytherin and snape makes harry’s scar hurt. when he winces ron asks “what’s wrong” and harry replies “Nothing, im fine” 

prepare for this to be a theme for the series. 

OKAY but imagine if harry was put into slytherin after rejecting draco like that sahjsajh how awkward. anyway

THE GHOSTS AND THE PAINTINGS ARE SO COOL AND THE COMMON ROOM !! 

This shot here is the most purest thing you will ever lay eyes on 💖 im genuinely tearing up. i want to stare at this forever

CLASSES START, transfiguration is awesome, potions is not. 

SNAPE GETS MAD AT HARRY FOR TAKING NOTES??? he was so excited to learn about potions and snape just ruins that excitement im sad. 

at dinner seamus, a 11 year old.....is trying to turn water into rum.....asjhahjahjs

THE MAIL SHOT IS STUNNING

GORGEOUS 

when ron gets hit in the face by his broom harry laughs and ron says in the most cute fond voice ohhhh shut up haaaaryyyy AND ITS SO PURE I LOVE

HARRY MAKES THE QUIDDITCH TEAM, i continue to fall in love with mcgonagall AND WOOD I LOVE HIM AND HIS ACCENT 

harry learns his dad also played quidditch 

and this is the part where my friend allie starting yelling CHASER HE WAS A CHASER hjshjsahjsahj 

we meet fluffy and he’s adorable!!!

im crying at theo just blowing up his feather shjjsahjhsa

ron hurts hemione’s feelings, the trolls gets out they save her life and BOOM BESTIES that scene was awesome!!! and so funny to watch i love them but the real star of this whole thing is dracos face

i LOVE DRACO SO MUCH jhshjsaajhs (i’ll focus more on my love for this kid in chamber of secrets) 

MY FAVE THING about the quidditch scene is when harry is nervous and oliver tries to comfort him but then he’s like I TOOK A BLUDGER TO THE HEAD AND WAS IN HOSPITAL FOR TWO WEEKS FIRST TIME I PLAYED hashsja i can’t

hermione sets a teacher on FIRE hjsahsaj and harry wins the match whoop 

I LOVEEEEE the trio interrogating hagrid its so funny ahjshjs

CHRISTMAS AT HOGWARTS IS PURE

THE INVISIBILITY CLOAK IS HERE !!! i don’t think i’ve said it before but i love how important the cloak is and we use it in every book and then we find out in the last book that it’s actually so much bigger than we ever realised <3 i love 

harry finds the mirror 

and this is by far my fave scene in the whole film. i cried during this. it was so so so beautiful and so heartbreaking. the music was gorgeous and the way harry touched his should where his mum’s hand was and everything just :(( SAD

and then when he’s sitting down just staring at it for hours

and dumbledore explains it to him and tells him the dwell on dreams quote that i love so much just ❤️ i adore this whole thing so much it made me so sad but it was also so beautiful and important. i love. one of my faves in the book and movie

NORBET THE DRAGON IS SO CUTE, all three of them plus draco get detention and dumbledore sends norbet off to romania himself :(( 

Draco is amazing during this whole scene shhsaj i love him

they see this horror

and draco��s slytherin self preservation kicks in and he MAKES A RUN FOR IT he’s so smart sahjhsajjahs harry just sits back and waits to die asshjajah until he is saved ofc shjjsah

HARRY RON AND HERMIONE MAKE A BREAKTHROUGH and they try to tell dumbles but he’s not there so they decide to take care of saving the stone themselves cos you know,,,,it’s totally an eleven year old’s job. 

after getting past fluffy the trio get stuck in devil’s snare and MY FAVE part is when ron is like “lucky we didn’t panic” ashjsajhashj

i love this kid

HARRY uses his flying skills and gets the flying key AFTER being hyped up by ron!!! so pure, this was also SO SO cool 

BUT NOT AS COOL AS THE CHESS PART literally so brilliant im in love with this scene

RON WAS AMAZING i seriously love it when ron gets to shine and he really truly shines ❤️

OKAY SLIGHT CRITICISM but i am sad the potion part was cut and i don’t think they mentioned that each part was made by one of the teachers because i loved seeing what each part says about each teacher when we find out what they created and the potion thing was so cool but that’s just a small thing and i get that you can’t add everything so it’s fine!! sahjjash 

WE GET TO THE MIRROR AND QUIRREL!!! and oh my god when he takes off his turban, voldy on his head is SO CREEPY

i’ve been anticipating to see this since i read about it and im shjsahjhas ITS SO DISTURBING WELL DONE MOVIE SAJHSAJHAH

anyway harry saves the day !!! and straight up kills quirrell 

dumbledore visits harry in hospital and i have to say i love this dumbles a lot he’s so kind and gentle and he seems to genuinely care about harry i love it. i love their convo so much it makes me tear up ajahshsa im a baby

Slytherin’s success gets totally blindsided at the feast when dumbles awards the golden trio and neville with NEW POINTS that makes gryffindor win sasajjasjh

savage shjsahjhjas

the film ends with harry leaving and hagrid saying goodbye and it’s the purest thing and the music is so beautiful im gonna cry im just ashjsajhhjas

OKAY OVERALL THOUGHTS 

i LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS MOVIE the music, the scenery, the design, the magical vibe, THE CHARACTERS. every single bit of this gave me so many feelings and i want to rewatch this a million times like i can’t stop thinking about it i just wanna keep rewatching it sahjjsha i feel so sajhshja I FEEL SO MUCH im so in love with this film and this story im i feel like im becoming more and more of a fan and it’s scary ashjas how much im falling for this fandom. i can’t think of anything else and this movie put all of it on screen for me and im in love. it’s perfect. 

THIS WAS SO LONG so if you read it all wow ashjsahjhajs im genuinely impressed and thank you 💖 i don’t think the other recaps are gonna be like this but i was just so excited COS ITS THE BEGINNING i got carried away and it turned into a beast. shajjhsahjas i can’t wait to talk about chamber of secrets tho IT SHOOK ME 

thank you so much for reading angels asjashj

[auroraphilealis]

Can you please recommend me some good slow burn fics and/or chaptered fics. Thanks in advance xx

Are you READY?

Cause I have so many recommendations

Under the cut cause I went crazy

Give Me A Try @danfanciesphil - Dan, a bartender at ‘Habenero’, Brighton’s hottest gay club, has been obsessed with AmazingPhil, the openly gay Instagram model for a long time. In all the fantasy meet-cute scenarios Dan has imagined for he and his semi-celeb crush, none of them involved him being at work, being soaked in various liquids, or being halfway through a Saturday night hell-shift. Sometimes, life doesn’t wait around for your plans.

Ships that Pass in the Night @agingphangirl - Dan and Phil are YouTubers. The catch? They’ve never met, and Phil doesn’t want them to.

The Meaning of Love @phandomsub - Phil Lester is an intern at the British Society of the Prevention of Cruelty to Neko – an organisation that focuses on rescuing abandoned or mistreated neko and rehabilitating them for re-adoption. He can’t say he fully agrees with the way many neko are treated, but in a world where they have no rights Phil has to agree that being someone’s pet is the best option for them. Then neko #504 is brought into the shelter and Phil finally realises just how alike humans and neko are. 

Here By My Side (A New Color to Paint the World)  - So one day, Phil walks in on Dan wearing a dress. And after a very confusing discussion, it comes out that Dan enjoys wearing girl’s clothing in private. Phil lets it be known that he’d be fine if Dan wore it around him and slowly, Dan starts opening up and letting Phil into his private world. But what Phil doesn’t expect is to start seeing Dan in a whole new way.

breathe and ill breathe (and im in love with you)  - A series of one-shots in which we explore various kinks. Said chapters will include biting, dirty talk, blindfolds, rimming, orgasm control/orgasm denial, spanking and scratching, orders and obeying, handcuffs and leg cuffs, breath play, and wax play.

Stirring in Love - @andthenshesaid-write When Phil applied to be a contestant on the Great British Bake Off he didn’t even expect to make the long-list, let alone make it into the actual tent. But make it he does and there he meets Dan, a baker unlike Phil in every possible way. After a rocky start, Phil realises that maybe he can learn some things from Dan after all, and the biggest things have nothing to do with baking.This fic was nominated for the Phanfic Awards 2016 Best of the Best!

A Map of My Heart and Mind - Dan and Phil get drunk and wake up married in Vegas, the day after Dan’s 25th birthday. Dan thinks they could just get it annulled but Dan knows what marriage means to Phil, how important it is, and he wonders if they can just fake it for a year so it’s not a total waste and then divorce. Of course, a year is a long time to pretend to be married and things can always change…

Emergency Substitute @parentaladvisorybullshitcontent - “You could always charm Phil for us,” Jack suggests. “Throw him off his game.”“Right, yeah,” Dan says sarcastically. “Midway through the match I’ll just Summon his broom to me and he’ll fall off and then Gryffindor’ll automatically win.”“I didn’t mean that kind of charm,” Jack says, under his breath.In which Dan is roped into playing Quidditch when all he really wants is a quiet life. And for Phil to never leave Hogwarts.

Road to Acceptance Series @anerdwithakoreanhaircut - Dan never thought alcohol could bring anything but misery into his life, and…well, he was kind of right; the headache was painful and the memories of how he spent his 18th birthday were gone. He manages to break into someone else’s home. But it’s because of the alcohol he meets Phil, who impacts his life in more ways than one.

If You Think you Know Me @ineverhadmyinternetphase - Fiction. Phil’s a police Sergeant. He’s been itching to get promoted to Inspector for ages, but to do so, he needs to crack his biggest case - famed internet hacker the Howler. Phil’s been after him for years, but he’d never managed to get even a hint towards his identity. When he meets a hot stranger in a bar one night, Phil thinks his luck might just be turning up. But maybe getting close to this particular stranger isn’t the best idea.

Everything You Never Wanted - Phil is an omega, he’s spent nearly his entire life going to Eastbrook, an omega only school. When his parents make the decision to transfer him into an alpha,beta,omega school his whole life is turned upside down. Especially when he meets Dan Howell, an alpha who can’t seem to stand him. No matter how hard the two try to avoid each other the universe seems to keep pulling them together.

Our Threadbare Lies @ramonaspeaks - Dan is eighteen years old and newly single. He’s ready to come out to his family but he thinks it would be a hell of a lot easier if he had a boyfriend to help him through it.

Taking Every Chance I’ve Got - All Dan wanted was to get drunk, really. Have a good time, meet a few new people. He didn’t really think about getting involved with someone as dangerous as Phil Lester (someone as cold, as pale and, well, as not alive), and he definitely didn’t think that one trip out to a bar would change his life forever.

Behind Closed Doors - Based very loosely on ‘A Little Princess’ and ‘David Copperfield’14 year old Dan Howell is sent away to boarding school leaving behind his abusive stepfather and incredibly ill mother. 17 year old Phil Lester is the school’s jack-of-all-trades who works his hardest under harsh circumstances to avoid the workhouse. The two boys meet and become close friends knowing they have to stick together if they are to survive the trials that lay ahead of them.

read between the lines (i will if you will) @phanbliss - Phil ^_^ (5:31 PM)Dan?danisNOTonfire xD i swear im really not. come check. (5:31 PM)yeah?Phil ^_^ (5:32 PM)I think I'm in love with youI justI can't wait to meet you--Skype conversations between Dan and Phil, leading up to their first meeting. 2009!Phan. Prepare for fluff.

First Impressions (Perhaps I Was Wrong) @phanbliss - Phil Lester goes back to university for his third year, expecting to live in the dorms with his childhood best friend PJ. That's how it's been for the past years, after all. However, due to a mistake of some sort, he finds himself with a new roommate to spend the semester with.Daniel Howell, three years his junior, has rich brown eyes, a laptop to hide them behind, and not more than two words to spare in Phil's direction. Phil is no fortune teller, but he foresees the upcoming months will be filled with a whole lot of awkward silence.Unless, of course, Dan proves him wrong...Could one little mistake lead to something entirely life-changing? Perhaps it could. After all, nearly everything changes when Phil meets Dan.-Excerpt: Dan's hair is soft against Phil's cheek, and his presence - gentle against his heart.Winner of Best Slow Burn in the Phanfic Awards 2016!

Reflections of the Heart - “Being told to dress up in a dinosaur onesie and have cereal catapulted at your face is a little odd. Waking up to find that you and your best friend have switched bodies? That’s fucking bizarre.”(Or, the multi-chaptered, slightly smutty bodyswap fic that no one asked for. Featuring whiny/annoying!Dan, sassy/beguiling!Phil, unintentional innuendos, intentional innuendos, unnecessary kitchen supplies, and just a pinch of magic).

Love Yourself @imnotinclinedtomaturity - A lot of things about Dan's life are pretty great. He gets to make the music he wants, he's got a great fanbase, and his manager is his best friend. A few things about his life suck a bit more. He's currently lacking inspiration, he's rather lonely, and he's stuck in a rut.Dan's been going to the same coffee shop for years. It's quiet, it's quaint, it's near his home. Most importantly: none of the employees give a shit that's he a world-famous singer. Things change when he meets the new barista.

In My Way @ineverhadmyinternetphase - Daniel Howell is 21 and Britain’s newest star. He’s just been cast in the much-anticipated film adaption of Last Man Standing, the popular teen fantasy novel with a huge fanbase hanging off his every tweet. In other words, Dan has made it big.Phil Lester couldn’t care less. He’s a stressed out PHD student working part time at a bookshop while he struggles to get into post-production. He’s 26 and still lives in a tiny flat on the fifth floor of a building with a lift more broken than it is in use. He loves books, but he thinks big film adaptions screw with the plot too much.Needless to say, Phil is less than impressed when Last Man Standing is getting filmed in his hometown. And he certainly doesn’t want anything to do with obnoxious, arrogant, so irritatingly perfect leading actor Daniel Howell.

Let Me Down Gently @ineverhadmyinternetphase - AU in which Dan is (briefly) a lawyer, until he gets fired and kicked out by his girlfriend. Wandering alone at night looking for a place to stay, he happens across a slightly strange man who introduces himself as Phil and who owns a B&B. Without much choice, Dan takes up the offer to stay there, and quickly grows to have a certain fondness for Phil. There’s only one problem: Phil runs the B&B with his long-term partner Alex.

jump a lil higher @snsknene - Dan co-hosts The Breakfast Show. Phil's his new producer. They fall in love, assisted by a bunch of romcom tropes I refuse to apologise for.

danandphilKINKS @snsknene - "I've got mine!" Dan said, waving it triumphantly. Phil knew this was serious, then, because a) he hadn't procrastinated on it at all, and b) it was barely legible: he'd handwritten it.Or: Dan and Phil have a bucket list. Except with less seeing the Great Wall of China and more Googling how to wash enema.

Strangers @waveydnp - dan is new to london and living in a mostly empty flat, desperate to forget the mistakes of his past. he's all alone -- until one day he gets a piece of mail addressed to someone in the neighbouring flat, one mr. philip lester. he can't exactly not return it, can he?

a match and a fuse @waveydnp - Phil is twenty six years old and stuck in a dead end life. He works at Starbucks and may or may not be carrying a torch for his best friend of eight years. He doesn't know who he is or what he wants--or how to go about figuring it out.That all starts to change when he happens upon the resume of a certain law school grad named Daniel.

[softtm]

Boyfriend! Cai Xukun

listen I’m so soft for this boy, someone send help and maybe the Yuehua boys

first of all oof, can we just appreciate his visuals like god damn

I want to snuggle you and drench you in holy water at the same

onto the meeting

you’re our dear Lay PD’s little sister like wow, must be nice to have an angel for a brother

when you heard he was gonna be the host/judge/pd for a show with 100 cute ass boys you were like ‘sign me the fuck up’

big bro Lay chips just laughed and was like ‘ha ya wish, I wouldn’t introduce you to Nct what makes you think I’ll let you scar my other pure children’

rip you

but like nah homie, you still plan on going to the idol producer show live so you can support your brother and our Yuehua boys plus Cai Xukun

cue final episode where you actually show up and get everyone food cus you a nice sis who uses her brother’s money to buy him + his children food

might sound a bit shady but you over here living as a poor student so using your rich ass bro might be a good thing this one time

Don’t steal kids

so you’re backstage handing out food and trying to find out where tf Yixing was when this one dude slightly bumps into you making you ALMOST drop the snacks

you’re here like ‘it’s fine my dude’

then you hear Cai Xukun’s voice and HOLY SHIT HE WAS MORE BEAUTIFUL IN REAL LIFE

WHAT HAS YOUR BROTHER BEEN DOING NOT INTRODUCING YOU TO THIS GORGEOUS ASS GUY

but you’re like chill y/n

Xukun is still apologizing cus he’s an angel with very good manners and oof I love him sm

so you’re like

why not seize the opportunity

‘can you help me find where my brother is then?’

he’s like sure who is it

‘Zhang Yixing’

cue shook Xukun

y’all ignore the task at hand cus you somehow get side tracked and eventually Lay comes and finds you and he’s really not surprised

‘damn there goes another one of my favorites, y/n stealing my sons from me’

you smacked him lightly while Xukun is embarrassed/happy about being one of Yixing’s favorite sons

after Yixing leaves cus my mans is a busy man you and Xukun get to talking and damn y’all hit it off pretty well

you exchanged numbers and that eventually leads to feelings and that led to him asking you out on ft at 2am

now actual boyfriend! Xukun

HOE MIGHT LOOK LIKE AN FBOI BUT IS LITERALLY THE SWEETEST LIL BEAN EVER AND WANTS TO PROTECT YOU FROM EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD

I mean

yeah he’s very protective but not the over baring way, just he doesn’t want to see you getting your feels hurt or go through anything too stressful

and you’re like “then you can take college for me” and this boi turned from that sweetheart to a tiger mom real quick

helps you study for all your tests and quiz’s even if he doesn’t know what’s happening

still wants to help so he reads flash cards

you appreciate it a lot especially when he gives you tiny little kisses everytime you’re right

cuddling is a must

has his arms around you anytime he can and makes you surprised most of the time

like you could be doing yoga and a wild Xukun shows up back hugging you and scaring you outta your mind

“HOLY FUCKING SHIT MAN”

cue giggles from Xukun

you sharing your mans with Ziyi

not that you mind but sometimes you get third wheeled

like if you’re at a fair and Ziyi suddenly shows up (spoiler, he checked sc map) you bet your ass that Xukun is spending at least 10 minutes chatting with him while you wonder off to go get some food

he was so surprised when he turned and saw you gone that he went on worried mode

probably almost cried in relief when he saw you stuffing your face with churros

listen he is a big softie even when he acts hard

so sometimes you’re gonna have to squeeze it outta him

if it’s like 2am and he’s not home, you can almost bet your ass he’s a the studio either practicing or writing

on those days you know that if you go try to drag him out that it would take a long ass time so you kinda just go there and drag him to a near by couch to sleep

don’t drive when you’re sleepy kids

and really y’all are just right for each other

I don’t think he would get really jealous but you could definitely see his change in moods when you get a little too close to someone he doesn’t personally know

since he’s also good at sending your emotions, he knows when you get jealous too and does this thing where he holds you hand even tighter and starts drawing circles on your palm as a little sign to signify that he’s only yours

oof im getting too into this

STORY TIME !!!

so remember how I mentioned Lay being your big bro?

yeah you and Xukun (ONE OF HIS FAVS) were dating so the news would have to get to him somehow right?

YA YEET

boy didn’t even know

at least he didn’t show any signs of knowing

you and Xukun on the other hand didn’t know that he didn’t know about your relationship making you guys think you got the okay

lmao it was not okay

so like he didn’t actually find out until y’all were in the move in phase together like wow that’s a long ass time

not his fault because in this universe he reunited with the rest of Exo and wows the world with their comeback and OT9 for life man

I mean yeah, he’s busy

so of course being the nice and caring brother he is he comes back to China, aka where you are, for vacation and decides to pay a visit with gifts cus he’s an angel and no one can convince he otherwise

he even made plans for a family dinner and bonding time like oof wish my brother was like that

so he comes and surprises you cus he wants to see how his precious little sister was doing

lmao he gets surprised instead

imagine the look on his face when Xukun opens the door instead of you cus you were showering or smth

“...”

“...”

“... hi gege”

“what the actual fuck man”

so now you have a confused/angry/hurt Yixing in your living room along with your scared boyfriend

wow whatta mess

so you come outta the bathroom and look at the situation and slowly backed up into the bathroom

“ZHANG Y/N”

lmao someone is in trouble

cue you and Xukun getting the talk from Lay

during the whole thing Xukun and you have a silent convo with your eyes cus y’all are THAT close

‘bitch wtf I thought he knew’

‘oops I guess not’

‘am I going to die’

‘I hope not’

Yixing catches one and is like oh hell nah

“ANYWAYS DO NOT FUCK WITHOUT CONDOMS AND MAKE ME AN UNCLE, I HAVE TOO MANY KIDS TO TAKE CARE OF ALREADY, BYE”

wow there Lay

what is he on

so Lay leaves and it’s just you and Xukun in the living room still confused about the situation

then he’s like

“Netflix and Chill?”

“hell yeah”

wow that was a long ass ride, more Lay-centric then anything

I’m so sorry this was more crack then fluff

oops