#think it’s gonna take more than a fairytale kiss on the hand to fix your dad’s suit lol

[ponds-of-ink]

Shattered Dreams but Intact Teacups (Followup/Part 2)

It’s finally here! Took longer than I thought, but I finally got it done! :D

In case you are new/need a refresher, here’s Part 1. In case you’re busy, though, the TL;DR is basically: Scraptrap tries to look good for Scrap Baby’s tea party through illusion disks and the plan backfires miserably. Now Scrap Baby/Elizabeth, while playing her tea party character, has to show him that she’s absolutely okay with him showing up sans-disks.

(@uwu-scraptrappy, get ready. I dunno what feels this part’ll give you, but I have a feeling it’ll give you some.)

Scrap Baby looked back at Lefty. Her mind flipped through the pages of her childhood memories (or, well, what was left of them). What fairy tale logic could she use here could she used to “cure” Princess Trapeze [and make Daddy feel better, of course]? What kind of ‘curse’ were they supposed to lift, anyway? A Beauty and The Beastie kind? A Cinderella-But-The-Fairy’s-Really-Mean type? Frog Prince? Little Mermaid…?

…Baby’s eyelids widened. “Blackbear, can we talk in private?” she asked softly, tilting her head towards a corner of the room.

“Sure thing, M’Lady,” Lefty replied in-character, already making her way to their intended spot. She waited for Baby to arrive, then asked the inevitable question: “Do you have a plan to cure her?”

“I do,” Scrap Baby answered, her tone fluctuating between pride and uncertainty. “But there’s one thing I need advice on. Advice that I think you can give.”

Lefty’s eyebrows raised. “All right, what is it?” she asked in turn.

“Do you think we can get a prince to give her a true love’s kiss?” 

“Not really,” Lefty responded solemnly, shaking her head. “If Trapeze’s story is as sad as she makes it to be, I don’t think anyone’s even given her a hug— Let alone a kiss on the lips… Or the cheek, if that’s more reasonable for her.”

Scrap Baby’s eyelids lowered. Her shoulders slumped. “Well, I don’t think you’d count for a prince, Sir Black-Bear,” she muttered. “You’re just a knight.”

Lefty nodded. “And kinda glad about it, actually,” she admitted weakly. “I really don’t want to waste a true love’s kiss on someone I’ve only known for a few minutes. What if I find someone I actually love and I need to break them from a sleeping spell?”

“That’s fair,” Scrap Baby agreed morosely. Her pupils slowly drifted to and fro, as if skimming through the memory that brought her to this train of thought. Her furrowed “brows” relaxed as something eased her. “But I’M still an option,” she resumed, her voice regaining its typical confidence. “Of course I count, I’m a princess! If ‘true love’ can count for us, then maybe I can break it myself!”

If Lefty were a human, one would have definitely been able to see a cold sweat forming on her forehead. “That depends on how the spell-caster defined ‘true love’ when giving the curse,” she sputtered out uneasily. “If he meant romance, then PLEASE don’t even think about trying. It just won’t work with anyone other than who she’s supposed to marry to later. If he meant the kind of love that families or friends have, then sure I guess. Even the love you show when helping out a stranger in a rough time might work, if the wizard was that merciful.”

“What are you trying to say?”

Lefty sighed. “You can try, but I dunno the specifics of this ‘true love’ thing,” she summed up gently. “Just smooch her on the cheek or something, just to be safe.”

“I already had something in mind,” Scrap Baby assured warmly, turning her head towards Scraptrap’s face and arms lying on the table. “I saw Cinderella’s Prince do it once.”

Confident in her plan, Baby quietly glided back to the table. She stopped besides Scraptrap, towering over him even as she tried to look more sympathetic and gentle with her posture. She stood there for a few seconds, analyzing the poor wretch before her. Then, as carefully as she could, she pulled out his good arm and slipped the ring back on. This was the only “warning” she gave before planting her best prince-like ‘kiss’ on his hand. 

To her surprise, Scraptrap was quick to respond. “What was that for?” he asked, quite frankly more shocked about the ring being back on his finger than the ‘smooch’ itself (though, not knowing the exact context, that did come out of nowhere). 

Scrap Baby smiled sheepishly. “I… thought this would count as a ‘true love’s kiss’,” she explained as she lowered his hand back down. “You know, the usual way a curse like yours is broken.”

Scraptrap’s puzzlement melted away. He rolled his (would’ve been reddened) eyes and sniggered to himself. “I’m sorry, Princess Melodica, but I’m afraid mine doesn’t work like that,” he said, returning to being properly in-character. “In fact, I’m not quite sure if there is a cure other than these two trinkets.”

“Oh,” Scrap Baby answered, mild disappointment seeping in.

“But at least you made her stop crying, Your Highness,” Lefty chimed in, moving to Scrap Baby’s side. “As far as I’m concerned, you’ve probably broken her real curse just by being this caring. Loneliness like hers must be considered a curse too, if you think about it long enough.”

Scrap Baby tilted her head at Lefty. “Really?” she asked the bear, clasping one of those black plastic paws in her mismatched hands. “But what about her—?”

Lefty cut in with a gentle shush. “That’s a spell to break another day,” she answered warmly. Then, she looked over at Scraptrap. “Besides, Princess Trapeze,” she continued in that same tone, “there’s an expression in my family’s kingdom that should do you well: ‘Fairer be the heart of gold and pearls than the fairest with dainty curls’… Or something like that.”

Scraptrap turned his face away as if flattered, but his expression showed otherwise. “B-But I don’t think either of those things apply to me,” he stammered, unsure if that was in-character or an unintentional expression of… potential guilt.

“I’m not talking total perfect—“ Lefty started, but stopped herself with a frustrated grimace. “Oh, never mind this whole part! I’m not good with summing up stuff like this. That was my dad’s job. I’ll just say that you’ll get better in due time if you’re not being extremely dumb, okay? Like, evil wizard-type of dumb.”

Scraptrap snickered at his companion’s outburst. “Okay,” he grinned as Lefty stomped back to her seat. “I think I understand. Thank you very much, Sir Black-Bear.”

“You’re welcome, but whatever,” Lefty grumpily murmured, crossing her arms and lowering the metal bowl over her head like a cowboy ready to sleep in his favorite rocking chair.

“As for you, Your Majesty,” Scraptrap resumed, turning his attention back to his glowing-eyed hostess, “I would like to thank you for your attempt. I don’t think anyone has actually tried to figure out an antidote before. Well, anyone besides me, I suppose.”

“You’re welcome,” Baby replied proudly, giving her guest her best curtsy. “I just thought I should try to help.”

Scraptrap removed the ring from his finger. “Speaking out of character for moment,” he spoke up, trying not to cringe at his own natural hoarseness, “I have to ask: Why did you do it, really? You could have easily made Princess Melodica politely excuse Trapeze from the party and carry on with her knight friend as if nothing happened. Why did you choose such a… considerate option?”

Baby’s faceplates twitched. Her roller skates shifted aimlessly in place. “Well, I didn’t want to make Melodica mean,” she explained, giving him her best ‘pout’. “It just didn’t feel right after what y— Trapeze said about being lonely.”

Trap nodded thoughtfully. “Sounds reasonable,” he muttered, picking up the ring and holding it in his hand. Then, as he started to slip it back on, something stopped him. He set the trinket back down with an uneasy expression. “I suppose now my only concern is…” his voice trailed as his eyes caught his murky reflection in that magenta crown. “Do you think…?”

His voice trailed again. His pupils remained fixed on that tinted ‘mirror’. Echoes of unseen, taunting voices rung in his mind, causing him to wince even more than usual. With each insult faintly recalled, he inspected his more ghastly features. The gash on his forehead (which itself was a source of ridicule enough already). The uneven eyelids that made him look dazed if he wasn’t paying attention to his emoting. The ghostly pin-prick irises that made his sockets look like metallic eyes. And this was only covering the parts one would notice if that disproportionate head didn’t—

A clawed arm gently shoved the crown away from the rabbit’s view. “Do I think what?” Baby asked softly, almost managing to lean down to his eye level. 

“D-Do you think the same applies to me?” Scraptrap sputtered out, the cooling fan in his robotic suit spinning at top speed. “Do you think I look… passable? Or at the very least not nauseatingly vile?”

Baby blinked. “I’m looking at you right now, aren’t I?” she asked in return, tilting her head to one side.

Scraptrap nodded slowly. 

“And you know how I get when I see something I really don’t like.”

That got a chuckle out of the old rabbit. Oh, how could he forget? A moody little arm cross here, a sulky turning her back away from the hated object there, or even just an outright cry of disgust and a pinching of her nose— Well, if she was still the little girl he raised and not an almost eight-foot animatronic.

“So it has to mean something when I look at you and don’t do that,” Baby insisted, holding her dad’s good hand in her own. “Yes, you aren’t pretty and shiny as Circus Baby used to be, but neither was Patchwork Patricia! Or Mr. Frankenstein when I invited him for tea! Or—“

“I think he gets the point, Baby,” Lefty cut in, her tone wavering between annoyance and enjoyment.

Scraptrap acknowledged Lefty’s interruption, then returned to the matter at hand. “And I think that point is…” his voice trailed for a moment as he processed his conclusion, “…you do not think that I’m absolutely repugnant.”

Scrap Baby nodded firmly. “You are not a pug or an ant or a peanut,” she said with (over-confident) authority. “You are my daddy and I’m not going to kick you out for being a Franken-bunny. I don’t care what anybody else says to me later about letting you stay at my tea party without that fancy watch on�� It’s my tea party, and you’ll be staying right here… if you want to.”

Minor skewing of the word ‘repugnant’ aside, the sentiment itself made Scraptrap beam in spite of the suit’s lowered rabbit ear. “I think I will stay,” he said as he slipped the ring back onto his finger. “Thank you so much, ‘Your Highness’.”

Scrap Baby giggled. “You’re very welcome, Princess Trapeze,” she responded, straightening her posture. “Now, let’s see if we can get this tea party back on track.”

“Sounds good to me,” Lefty remarked, lifting her second hat above her eyes. “All this reassuring was great, but I was honestly starting to fall asleep.”

The same couldn’t be said for Michael and the technician in the security office. The technician looked away from his static-ridden “TV” to see Michael pacing in one part of the room. “Guess this is a ‘like if you cry every time moment for you, huh?” the technician grinned sheepishly. “You look like you’ve just finished the latest season finale for The Immortal and the Restless.”

Michael stopped pacing. “Just change to a different camera, would you?” he asked quietly. “I need to know how the rest of the building is doing.”

“Sure thing, Mr. Afton,” the technician answered, switching from one camera feed to the other. 

[purplecraze]

Beauty and the Beast AU 17

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 5:31 PM

He finished to eat his portion and looked at the starts again

"Also soon we will find a cure, so dont worry too much"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 5:35 PM

"......if you say so..." he sighed deep and closed his eyes.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 5:36 PM

"Sleepy?" He asked before yawning

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 5:37 PM

he nodded, not replying.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 5:39 PM

"We could sleep here, its warm and nice..." He yawned again and piled up his jacket and coat, making a pillow with those and laying his head down.

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 5:40 PM

there came no further answer from him.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 5:41 PM

"....Good Night Fugo, love you" he smiled and curled up

As the other was asleep, Nara looked at him, despite everything he was really pretty...

He glanced at him for a bit, getting a bit closer.

Narancia looked at the other's lips, cheeks, nose and forehead, and not even noticing he moved his hand, fixing a hair lock that was covering the other's eye, his finger slighty touching the other's forehead

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 5:49 PM

his hand felt slightly tingly on contact, but.... nothing happened.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 5:52 PM

Nara ritired his hand as soon he realized what happend, and yet his hand was ok.

"...."

Maybe between the full moon and the dome-

He got a bit bloder, gently tracing his finger on the other's cheek, his skin was suprising soft, Nara had to fight the istinct to pinch it

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 5:54 PM

it felt similar to touching an electric fence, but his hand was undeniably fine.

"h..." fugo frowned a bit on the unused contact.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 5:57 PM

Something Narancia could handle for a bit.

"Nh..."

He wondered...Ok probabily it was the dumbest idea he had that week but-

"Good Night Fugo"

He leaned on, giving him a quick peck on his lips, before his cheeks flushed and the ran back to his spot, curling up and facing the wall.

Of course it wasnt some fairytale where the true love kiss fixes everything

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 5:59 PM

"!!!" Fugo's eyes opened and he shot straight up.

Did he know how he was touched? no. Did he know the other tried to touch him? Definitely;;;;

"What do you think you were doing??!?!!"

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 6:01 PM

"Y-Youhadsomethingonyourface" he said, still hiding his face with his hands

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 6:01 PM

"YOU IDIOT!! It could have KILLED you!!"

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 6:03 PM

"Well it did not!" He yelled back, more flustred than angry

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 6:04 PM

"You're alright??! you're not hurt!??? you didn't accidentally touch me???" he was more panicked than angry too.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 6:07 PM

"Im fine!" He squeaked "and sorry- i didnt on purpose, you looked so paceful sleeping but you had some hair in your eyes and it was bothering you and i just wanted to move it and i didnt thinked about it and then it didnt hurted so i poked your cheek and it wad like when you wear a wool sweater and your hair get all frizzy but didnt hurted and sorry for kissing you!!" He said rushing and taking a breath just at the end, face all red

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 6:08 PM

"................." Fugo froze over, wide eyed.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 6:09 PM

"I-Im gonna go back to my room!" He squeaked taking his stuff

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 6:09 PM

"..........you....touched me.."

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 6:39 PM

"Im sorry!" He said again trying to get the jacket from the ground, but he was weirdly slippery. Or maybe his hand was just shaking

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 6:40 PM

"........." the boy was in an absolute daze. seems he's not very concerned about the kissing matter... "....y.....you're sure??"

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 6:41 PM

"Yeah- i-i mean it was an accident, but when i noticed it only barelly stinged i tried to touch your cheek"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 6:59 PM

".....I-...y-you're-.....really?' he looked like he could break any moment.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:01 PM

Narancia nodded

"I-Im sorry really- you looked so paceful in your sleep and didnt even consider the curse"

Nara sounded more like a puppy caught doind something he shouldnt have

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:03 PM

Fugo looked down to his hands, muttering to himself: "ᶦˢ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵃ ᵈʳᵉᵃᵐˀ ᵃᵐ ᴵ ᵈʳᵉᵃᵐᶦⁿᵍˀ ᶦᵗ ᶜᵃⁿ'ᵗ ᵇᵉ..."

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:05 PM

"Fugo-- ugh, lets take both a breath- maybe between the dome and the full moon we kinda found a loop hole"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:05 PM

he nodded a bit, not entirely knowing to what. he looked up to the other. "w...what should I do..?"

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:06 PM

"W-Well, dunno...w-wanna try hold hands?" He asked awkardly

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:07 PM

"....." the boy gasped for air, fighting an internal struggle of rushing over to the other or backing away, because this CAN'T be true.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:09 PM

At the same time, nara didnt really knew if he should get closer or leave him his space but...

"Look, my hand its ok, even the rash from when i picked you up the other day its gone, its ok- w-we dont have to its you arent ready"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:14 PM

"b...but I.....how?...d-did the curse break?"

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:24 PM

"I not sure- i did felt some tingy when i touched you, and i dont know if we will be able to touch eachother outside the dome, or when the moon is not full..." he sighed "so i guess, we have till morning to see"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:26 PM

He nodded a bit, shyly eyeing the other, not daring to ask for it, it's just too dangerous...

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:27 PM

He scooted a bit closer

"W-Well, your choice, but we will have till next full moon to try again" he said gently reaching out his hand

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:29 PM

He swallowed, inching his quivering hand closer. "I don't want to lose you..." he admitted in a shrill voice.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:30 PM

"You will not, i promise" he said giving him a smile

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:34 PM

"......" he didn't look at the other, fixed on their hands. he could almost feel the heat of the other's skin as his nails ghosted against narancia's finger.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:35 PM

He let Fugo take his time, as much his own fingers itched to touch and grab as much the other

"Its ok Fugo"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:37 PM

since his hand was shaking so much, it accidentally brushed against the other. he gasped, retreating his fingers quickly to his own handpalm.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:38 PM

"Look, my hand its fine~" and waved it

"Wanna try again?"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:43 PM

He swallowed and grit his teeth, inching his hand closer once more.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:44 PM

Narancia brushed his fingers to Fugo's

He was trying to be patient for the blonde, but he was as much excited

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:49 PM

Fugo's hand froze in mid-air as he felt Narancia's fingers on his, producing an involuntary pitched whimper.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 7:52 PM

"Ehy, its ok, im still here, not gonna go away" and slowly held his hand, tangling their fingers together

"Here, we did it!"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 7:59 PM

holding his hand felt like a combination of glass shards and hot coals. but his skin was doing just fine.

Fugo hiccuped, succumbing to the pressure and tears started to drip down.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 8:02 PM

"Ehy, ehy Fugo its ok-"

He wispered sofly, moving from his right to in front of him, still holding the hand.

Narancias heart was beating like crazy in his chest, so he colunt even immagine how Fugo was feeling

"...Can i?" He asked raising his free hand to the other's face

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 8:13 PM

Fugo was nothing short of overwhelmed, the tears wouldn't stop. He couldn't think straight anymore, he just wanted to hold this hand forever. if this was a dream, he didn't want to wake up. if it would cost Narancia's life, he'd die with him!

He nodded eagerly between the tears.

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 8:18 PM

As soon the other nodded, Nara cupped his cheek, like he felt before, his skin was really soft, a bit dry, but he kinda get that the other negliget himself before.

He tried to dry the tears with his thumb, rubbing it under the corner of his eye

"Shhhh, everything its ok"

As much he wanted to pull him into a hug, he was feeling like someone trying to cuddle a puppy that was kicked too much  and now was scared of being touched

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 8:36 PM

also, it felt undeniably painful, the more Narancia touched him, despite it not showing on his skin at all. just what would he feel if he'd put his body in full contact?

"a-..are you alright?" he muttered between sobs, clenching his fingers tightly and greedily around the other's. "Tell me the truth. you really don't feel anything??"

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 8:38 PM

"Told you, it sting a bit at first, but nothing i cant handle" He smiled, still caressing his face

"You ok? Want to sit down? If its too much we can stop"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 8:46 PM

"h..hmn...." he wasn't too sure if he could believe that. But Fugo couldn't fight himself feeling selfish. just... just for tonight...

"I must be looking pathetic.... are you-... are you alright with this?"

orange-plane-boy — 09/04/2021 8:48 PM

"I am! Ans you dont pathetic ok?? It must be a lot to take after 3 years! And umh-" he looked away "if you want you can touch me back"

purplecraze — 09/04/2021 8:54 PM

"......" he swallowed, looking straight at the other. "we'll have to let go before sunrise. if it's something you're still feeling, it's certainly an accumulation of magic. It won't be the same outside of the favorable circumstances....

but....but until then..."

He lay his hand on top of the hand on his cheek. "I don't ever want to let you go..."

[calumxkisses]

Us | c.h.

pairing: calum hood x f!reader

genre: fluff

warnings: none

summary: Michael and Crystal take you and Calum along to visit their wedding hall and it's the perfect location for a dance full of love.

a/n: am i obsessed with the idea of dancing with Calum? yes. let me know if you liked it. i'm still not really good at writing fluff imagines but i'm learning and i'll hopefully do better in the future.

you should read this imagine while listening to: us

➳

“So, this is the wedding hall?” Calum asks as he enters looking around the room. The structure is huge, there is still a lot to do but some decorations have already been fixed.

“Yeah, there are a few things we would like to change but it’s pretty much gonna be like this.” Michael responds, walking inside the room and looking around.

“It's lovely, guys. It's like being in a fairy tale.” You whisper while looking around the room. Your fingers are barely intertwined with Calum's as you look at the room, admiring the ceiling and the windows overlooking the sea.

You turn to Crystal and notice a tear running down her face as she admires the room. A smile forms on your face as you see your best friend so happy, her dream is coming true and you couldn't feel more proud of her.

This marriage has overcome the strangest obstacles, the biggest certainly was having to be postponed due to a pandemic, but their love has never stopped in front of these, it has grown more and more and to be able to be among the witnesses of their love is among the things you are most grateful for.

The room is very large, has an oval shape and is surrounded by windows overlooking the sea. Some tables have already been set up and embellished, they are also circular in shape and have floral decorations in the center. The tablecloth is embroidered in lace, it is pearl white but the different colored decorations, which accompany the flowers in the center, make the table look wonderful and original, recalling Crystal's passion for plants.

The chairs that surround them, simple but still elegant, have ribbons that decorate them. They’re gold and white, yet their simple design makes them look gorgeous.

“We are going to talk to the wedding planner to fix some things, in the meantime you can stay here and see if there is something else that we should change.” Crystal's voice grabs your attention, as she approaches Michael and takes his hand in hers. The wedding planner is at the entrance, smilingly waits for the couple and, for a moment, you think that there can’t be a more beautiful job than being able to make the dreams of couples come true.

“Calum, can you check that the stereo is working? They told me they fixed it but I haven't been able to check it yet, you'd be doing me a big favor.” Michael asks as he leaves the room grinning and not leaving time to Calum to reply.

“Gotcha.” Your boyfriend replies, shaking his head in amusement and smiling.

As Calum approaches the speakers, you take another moment to admire the room.

Looking up, your breath locks in your chest as Crystal's gorgeous decorations leave you in awe. The ceiling, which was previously simply white and wooden, is decorated with strips of tulle hanging like waves, giving life to a sense of peace and softness. The stripes extend all over the ceiling, giving the impression of being in the middle of the clouds.

In addition to the tulle, in a delicate way, some threads of small lights descend from the ceiling, romantically illuminating the room and creating an intimate and unobtrusive atmosphere.

A small elegant chandelier hangs in the center of the room, it is gold and its light is not as strong as someone might think, it is ideal to keep the room more illuminated in the most important moments, but its presence is more scenic than functional.

Some leaves and some flowers come down intertwined along the edges of the windows, hiding the window frame and making the atmosphere of the room even more simple and elegant.

The main theme is certainly white and gold, but Crystal and Michael made sure to add a few more hints of color as well, in order to make the room less monotonous and more fairytale.

The light inside the room disappears, leaving only the small lights that descend from the ceiling on. You open your mouth to ask what happened, but the words do not come out as your gaze rests on the sea outside the room, calm as in the best days, while a wonderful sunset is reflecting on the clear water. The sky is painted orange and pink, some clouds are scattered in the sky and you no longer have any doubts on why your friends have chosen this location.

There is a sense of peace in the air and you feel like you are in a different world, in a world of calm and joy, while the land where you have lived in these difficult months seems a distant memory.

“It's beautiful, isn't it?” Calum whispers in your ear as his hands rest on your hips from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder and looking outside.

“If it's a dream, please don't wake me up.” You whisper, closing your eyes and letting the sea air coming in through the window on your left, caress your face.

“I could never do that, you are too beautiful when you sleep.” You can see him smile as he whispers those words and, as every time he smiles, you smile too. There is something contagious about his joyful expressions, they warm your heart and you can't help but share them with him.

“Does the stereo system work?” You ask after a few minutes of silence, turning around to face him and leaving a quick kiss on his lips.

“Do you want to try it with me?” he asks with a smile, pulling his cell phone out of his pocket and pressing a couple of buttons on the screen.

“What do you mean?” A confused expression forms on your face. The long lilac summer dress moves with every blow of the wind but the summer temperature makes sure that you don't feel cold.

Calum puts the phone back in his pocket and, after a few seconds, the first notes of your favorite love song can be heard throughout the room.

While you smile, your boyfriend clears his throat and, reaching out his hand, asks you: “May I have this dance?”

Your cheeks turn red and the muscles of your face stretch into an even bigger smile as you nod and grab his hand. Calum walks you to the center of the room and holds your hips, bringing you closer to him.

And, as the first words of one of the most beautiful love songs echo in the room, you rest your head on his chest and close your eyes as your feet move to the sweet rhythm of the music.

Sometimes I'm beaten

Sometimes I'm broken

'Cause sometimes this is nothing but smoke

Is there a secret?

Is there a code?

Can we make it better?

'Cause I'm losing hope

Calum had never loved dancing, at least not this much. His footsteps were limited to a few twirls and jumps on stage or some weird movement on the dance floor, when the alcohol level in his body was way too high to be ashamed of anything he was doing. He had always seen dancing as something that did not belong to him, an activity that stressed him more than it should, and he had never imagined that he could love it so much.

But after you arrived in his life, one of the moments he loves the most is to dance with you, at two in the morning, in the kitchen, to the notes of any love song you are obsessed with in that moment, in the peace of the silence and of the sleepless night, while Duke looks at you confused and waits for the right moment to come ask for cuddles.

The way you let him hold you, the way you let yourself be vulnerable in front of him, away from judging eyes, and the way he feels like protecting you, in the darkness of the room, makes him feel a sense of calm that he hasn' t felt for a long time before your presence in his life.

And even if he was the universe's worst dancer and the whole world was watching him, he’d still dance with you.

Tell me how to be in this world

Tell me how to breathe in and feel no hurt

Tell me how could I believe in something

I believe in us

Calum squeezes your hand tightly as, observing you with eyes full of love, he spins you in front of him. The sunlight lights up your face and the man in front of you is sure he has never seen anything more beautiful. You look like a Greek goddess, the kind you hear in stories and in history books, the goddesses who saved the bravest soldiers and helped them in the toughest feats.

This is how he feels, ever since he saw in you a friend - and then a girlfriend - more than an enemy, he saw his little world in fractions being put back into place, with delicacy and love, and he is ready to sacrifice his most important assets to always have you on his side.

The sun is slowly setting, making room for the moon and all its stars. Yet, with him holding you tight, it seems to you that the world has stopped.

After the wreckage

After the dust

I still hear the howling, I still feel the rush

Over the riots, above all the noise

Through all the worry, I still hear your voice

Calum would be able to describe every single moment he walked into the dark and you led his way out with your light. Whenever he had writer's block, whenever anxiety kept him from getting through his day, whenever his thoughts got too dark and the demons took over, you were there.

Your delicate hands caressing his face or the sweet melody of your voice whispering comforting words, Calum remembers every one of these moments, every single one.

When the world becomes too heavy and distressing, he knows that you will be by his side and that you will help him carry the heavy weight.

And when the insecurities make their way into him, you will always be ready to remind him that he deserves to be loved.

So, tell me how to be in this world

Tell me how to breathe in and feel no hurt

Tell me how 'cause I believe in something

I believe in us

Tell me when the light goes out

That even in the dark we will find a way out

Tell me now 'cause I believe in something

I believe in us

Between dance steps, Calum lulls you slowly, the song continues to echo in your ears, and even your jaw relaxes. It’s so calming to not feel the weight of the world and the speed of time but to be able to enjoy this moment with a light heart and a head empty of all worries. In a society that runs fast and demands perfection from everything, having the opportunity to be able to stop and be left alone in love and peace is a luxury that cannot always be granted. Especially when your boyfriend is in an internationally famous band and you are trying to make your smaller, yet still of great value, dreams come true.

There is no worry about having to say the right words, having to wear the best clothes or just being yourself and praying to be accepted by millions of people who don't know you but who judge you as being part of your life.

‘She's not good enough for him’ or ‘He deserves someone more beautiful, with a perfect body, with a good mental health’ or even ‘She doesn't really love him, she does it for the money’ And there are also those gorgeous people he meets often, who work in some radio or who know mutual friends, and immediately those words written under your photos get inside you and make every certainty collapse.

You look at yourself into the mirror and you think they're right, that you're not perfect and that he really deserves one of those cover girls or someone who won't make him worry if you don't answer the phone. Insecurities that, however, under the sheets of a now familiar home, Calum makes you forget about.

And the words he whispers to you every day, the way he looks at you as if you were the most beautiful person in the world, the consideration he has of you, the notes he leaves on the table when he goes out or all those details that he pays attention to, they convince you that he doesn't care what size you are, the color of your skin or the negative thoughts that cross your mind, he loves you for your intelligence, for the kindness you carry in your heart and the delicacy with which you treat him, for the funny sound of your laugh and the way you make him feel in heaven, while reminding him to always keep his feet on the ground. And those comments, those ideas, disappear in the blink of an eye.

And now, like every time you’re with him, with your head on his chest and with his arms holding you, with the sea in the background and the lights that illuminate that corner of paradise that Crystal created, everything seems to be in the right place.

Used to be kids living just for kicks

In cinema seats, learning how to kiss

Running through streets that were painted gold

We never believed we'd grow up like this

Calum had never had good words to describe his love life. He had had love stories he was not proud of, toxic or in which he hadn't really felt strong feelings, and of the only good stories he had had, he didn’t like to tell about them because he was ashamed of how he had lived them. He believed that he hadn’t committed enough or that he hadn’t loved in the right ways.

So, he had decided not to try anymore, to put aside that desire to want to create something with someone and the more the people around him fell in love with and the more he thought about the effort he should have made, and all that stress made him forget the meaning to love. He didn’t want to meet anyone anymore, his life was good as it was.

And when you showed up awkwardly, in ruined makeup and wet clothes, Calum had thought of a thousand reasons why he didn't want to deal with you. Who shows up at an event dressed like this? What kind of girls does Crystal meet? And the way you talked about how your umbrella broke halfway and how you were about to be hit by a car didn't interest him. Calum just wanted to eat at that restaurant, pulled there by his best friends after a day spent in the studio.

And when the party moved to a friend’s house, it only bothered him how carefully you made sure you didn't spill your drink as you moved between dancing bodies and wagging dogs. He couldn't stand how you talked about life to Ashton, the love you put into describing the people who were part of it.

And when he saw you a few weeks later, he hated the way you greeted him and the way you worried about how he was doing. All too cheesy, too filmy and unrealistic.

But then, without realizing it, between one hateful look and another, Calum listened with interest to the way you talked about your passions and hobbies, how you described the places you had visited and the cities you dreamed of seeing. He laughed at you dancing and smiled when you paid attention to what people were saying around you, mentally marking down all the information to make sure to always ask the right questions.

And he found himself wanting the same attention from you, to see the smile you gave to others, dedicated to him. And so his answers to you became less and less cold and he had become less good at hiding his sweet eyes from you.

And even though every cell of his body was asking otherwise, to not feel another broken heart, Calum had decided to kiss you in the backstage of the iHeartRadio 2018, while you were wearing his leather jacket and moving his hair from the front of his eyes.

And the rest is history.

So, tell me how to be in this world

Tell me how to breathe in and feel no hurt

Tell me how 'cause I believe in something

I believe in us

Tell me when the light goes out

That even in the dark we will find a way out

Tell me now 'cause I believe in something

I believe in us

And like when Emily Bronte said ‘Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same’, as in the case of your love, there isn't much to do. You cannot go against fate if two hearts are meant to spend the rest of eternity together.

There are no arguments, reasons or strong enough excuses to separate those who are connected by much more than just love. And that’s what makes you this close, that in the darkness of the world, in the hell of fear and anger, that strong feeling resists, and fighting together is always better than doing it alone.

It’s a strong love, ready to defeat everything that tries to divide it, ready to sacrifice the absolute good of one, in order to spend the rest of life in misery together.

Like the rebellious angels, who preferred an earthly love to the eternal glory of God, so you are bound to laugh and cry together, and there is nothing that can make you happier than that.

Calum turns you around one last time, whispering a compliment in your ear and making your laughter echo across the room. The sun has now set and the stars are taking its place, the lights that descend from the ceiling look like little fairies that got lost admiring your love and the room has taken the shape of a magical forest.

Your friends are at the door of the entrance, with eyes full of love they look at the two of you laughing together and their hearts melt to see you so in love and they can’t help but imagine themselves in your place, in a few weeks, ready to dance and share the same love that you and Calum are sharing.

Breaking the peace of that dream, with pride and a grin on his face, is Michael, clapping and laughing at the way your boyfriend is completely in love with you but also feeling happy to see him so positively changed. He takes a few steps toward you and you don't need to hear him speak to imagine the comments he's thinking, making you and Calum shake your heads smiling.

“Just so you know, I expect to see you dance like that at our wedding too.” Your best friend's sweet voice says as she points at you by moving her finger between you and your boyfriend.

You run toward Crystal, her pink hair is tied up in a low ponytail, with a few tufts running down her face. Her smile is big on her face, lighting up her joyful expression. You have a billion questions to ask her, most of them are about the choices they made for the final decorations and your heart is so full at thinking about your best friends getting married.

You’re too caught up in your happiness to notice Calum, just a dozen steps behind you, smiling to his bandmate while whispering: “I want to spend the rest of my life with her.”

“Well, you know what to do.” Michael responds by nodding with his head and looking proudly at his best friend.

“Will you help me organize the proposal?”

--

[armyhome]

Handwritten Love | Lee Soohyuk

⇢ pairing: Soohyuk x Reader.

⇢ genre: deluded.

⇢ word count: 1.063.

I hit my head against the table multiple times, like this would help and fix the ideas in my head. I just need to solve this cannon, please, heavenly deities give me inspiration. The deadline is close and I will be ruined if I don't finish this in time. Just a few words, please? When I was going to hit my head another time,  a hand touched my forehead. 

"Who is this?" I asked afraid of the answer. Don't say editor, don't say it.

"Your editor." Fuck, I'm dead! Well, at least it was good to live this life. I looked up and found Soohyuk's cold eyes. How could someone so evil make me lose my breath? "I hope you're suffering 'cause the end of your story is so sad, all your readers will cry." I take a deep breath.

"You know I hate sad endings" I look at the screen of my computer, there's no way to save one of the leads, but…

"Do I need to read the feedback your last work received?" He cleans his throat in a dramatic way.

"If I say no, will stop you?" I take a sip of my cold coffee, cold like my editor's heart.  

"The creation of the universe is amazing..." I know, I'm awesome in creating the right atmosphere "But still incapable of creating a realistic or believable ending" I roll my eyes, you wanna sad ending, watch your own life, or read a newspaper, I don't know "Here's another one: I don't get why the writer is so obsessed in saving all the characters, they are not real people. It makes the story wack, even when the plot is good" I start to write with anger "Just one more: If the writer wanna create a fairytale is okay for me, just don't hide it over a good thriller plot..."

"If that's what they  think about me, why do they keep buying my books? Am I forcing someone to?" I get up, everyone in the convenience store looks at me "Sorry," I say, and sit again "That's my writing style. Why do I have to change?" My breath becomes heavy, Soohyuk arches his left eyebrow.

"You're an amazing writer, but everybody knows that you’re just scared of showing your best!" I bite my tongue to not say for him to go to hell.

"The last time I wrote about an accident..." I take a deep breath "You know what happened! I don't wanna take any risks!"

"Hey, look at me" I look inside his eyes, there's no coldness anymore in there "Your youngest sister’s death is not your fault, it was just a coincidence..."

"Too much of a coincidence for me, I can't handle if something like that happens, I can't! Either you can tell the publishing company that, they can take my book in the way I wanna write, or I'll find another place that would like to do it"  

"I will not let you give up on a good plot writer, you know it's gonna hurt more after the release, having to read over and over all the bad commentaries. How is your therapy going?" I look at the screen of my notebook. 

"I don’t wanna talk about that with my editor.." So Soohyuk smiles, gets off the table, fixes his overcoat and kisses my cheek. 

"Hey bae, how was your day?" He holds my hand and sits right next to me, I rest my head on his shoulder, he was using the perfume I gave him on his birthday, so good.

"Terrible, my editor is eating my soul" He laughs.

"Do you want me to talk to him?" I wave my head negatively.

"I just need to receive a little bit of your love" He kissed the top of my head. 

"What is wrong, bae?" Soohyuk put his hand on my face, I closed my eyes and focused on his touch.

"I got romantically involved with my editor, and now he doesn’t know how to fire me 'cause it seems I won't write what is needed..." I opened my eyes and saw his beautiful smile. 

"You're the best writer, I guess he would resign before letting you go anywhere else, but why do you think that you will be able to write what is needed?" I sigh he was good.

"You know, sad endings, deaths, accidents, killing characters just to build a good plot, I hate those things. I'm so afraid that writing something will make it happen again..." His arms became stronger around me. 

"Are you going to therapy?" I bite my bottom lip. 

"I was too focused on my writing, maybe I missed one or two appointments..." Soohyuk takes a deep breath.

"Bae.. your health comes first then your job. Are they pushing you too hard?" 

"No, I just lost myself in writing this story cannon, but I'll make an appointment, don't worry" I look at our hands, my hand was so much smaller than his, so the wind brings a cherry flower petal to our hands. 

"Should I take a few days off so we make a small journey? I don't know... To see the ocean?" I smile looking at him, how lucky I was to find someone so good for me. 

"Maybe after the release of my work. I'll try my best to make a more realistic thriller this time, but after that, I'll not read any commentaries, so what do you think about running away with me?" He approaches his face so I can feel his breath against my face, my eyes close at the moment I feel his lips against mine, so warm, I wanna run to our apartment and spend the rest of this afternoon kissing him, laying in his arms, but I need to finish the chapter first. Soohyunk let a soft whine of protest escape when I moved away. 

"Any time, any day, let’s runway now bae!" Soohyuk kiss my forehead. 

"I have to finish this chapter, and you need to come back to being an editor" The smile on his face was gone, he got up one more time, looking serious, I laughed. 

"Was a nice reunion writer" He says all formal "Hope to see your work soon" He walks away just a feel steps, so he turns around running and kiss me again, "See you tonight at dinner bae, bye"  

[jamestrmtx]

Fairytale Complex - [Undertale | Sans x Reader]

[Gender Neutral, Frisk's Parent Reader | Slow Burn]

Chapter Twenty Two | Another Medium (Part 2 of 4)

[First] | [Previous] | [Next]

"Hurry, ren. We're gonna be late!"

You smile down at Frisk and watch as they tug at the edge of your shirt to try pulling you along with them.

The door's left open, and even though those meant to pick you up for the event aren't here yet, they still urge you to go outside and wait.

"It's only seven, honey." Your thoughts drift back to your video call and Sans's most recent text message, letting you know half an hour later that he'd be here soon. "We've got a few minutes left." You grab their hand and put a stop to their energy, facing their eyes. "Are you that excited about starting school?"

They nod and grin wide. "Even more, if you're gonna be working there, too!"

Your smile falls as you remember the folder Sans had given you. It had been thrown into the farthest corner of your bookshelf that same day, and you'd been too reluctant to look at it any more ever since. You didn't want to take their kindness and help for granted, just as much as you didn't want to forget about your reasons for learning more about monsters. Your godmother was right in terms of you needing to understand them more, so you've established it upon yourself to bring that up during your first, official date night with the skeleton. Understanding the changes being made to the Underground could aid you with the slim chance of finding a way to either halt or delay it from becoming a big tourist attraction, and you could finally be more clear and upfront about your feelings related to the dream -- even if all of that was easier said than done. Not only had you crossed far too many boundaries with him already, but you were still keeping your dubious relationship with him, all while continuing to be wary of him and everyone else for their past. The subtle but no less irate light to his gaze when having your aunt bring up the the Judgement Hall had been more than sufficient for you to try something -- or at least, assist him and every other monster with that process.

In short, hypocrisy's absorbing you bit by bit, and today's your very first attempt at trying to break free from that. Whether you succeed or not doesn't matter. Giving it a shot, on the contrary, does. Even the slightest amount of closure achieved with your research could help in setting your thoughts straight, and -- perhaps -- to finally stop yourself from comparing monsterkind with Jerry.

To put it this way: you couldn't allow yourself one thing if you were allowing the other to continue happening.

After all, why were you willing to engage in a relationship with someone like Sans, when you were still far from forgiving and much less forgetting Jerry over abandoning Frisk for so many years?

Why were you willing to befriend someone like Alphys, who'd been close to ending up in jail due to the failed experiments made on those of her own kind?

Why were you willing to book a night at Mettaton's hotel, knowing he'd once set Frisk into danger greater than any other monster you knew had -- Undyne being a close second?

Even someone like Papyrus brought harm to them once!

"Ren," Frisk calls out, tugging your hand. "You look angry. Are... Are you okay?"

You nod and let out a breath, composing yourself. "I'm fine, honey."

"Are you still thinking about avenging me?"

Your eyes shoot wide open at that, and you can't avoid suspecting they might have the capability of reading your mind.

Regardless of their word choice, you were -- in a sense -- wanting to avenge them from anyone who'd once caused them harm, be it Jerry, the monsters, or the loud and nosy neighbour from next door wondering why Frisk enjoyed playing with action figures just as much as they did playing with princesses.

"Ren!"

Hearing their whine of concern, you snap out of it and look down to see they've let go of your hand, both their arms now outstretched and in wait for your embrace.

"Do you want a hug?"

Your smile returns at that, albeit a bit more melancholic compared to the first time. You get down to their height and pull them in for a hug, sighing when you have them safe in your hold; it feels right to have them close and in your care, no matter how much your mind insists otherwise. The question you brought up back at the Judgement Hall still feels like the most subconscious part of your mind had possessed you, insisting you turn back to how you used to be after Frisk's fall.

"You don't need to protect me that much!" they say, letting go. "I... I know all the monsters well, so I'd tell you if any one of them's bugging me. You don't need to hate them for my sake, and you don't have to compare them to dad, either." Without a doubt, if humans still had the capability of using magic and spells, you would label them a mind reader. "You should get to know them on your own first, and not just based on who they are to me. Because if that's really all up to me, then the only one I don't really like much is..."

At that, they stop; they bring a finger to their chin and tap it twice, delving deep in their thoughts along the way.

"Huh..." Frisk taps their chin again and their gaze turns furrowed, scrunching up the more they think about it. "I mean, I don't really know if I dislike any of them... I just know I wanna have friends!"

You're compelled -- if not, urged -- to argue against that, though your heart stops you from spilling any of those thoughts out. Still, your mind attempts to push through it. Personal feelings couldn't cloud your judgement, if that meant it could bring harm to your child.

"Even if they-"

Hearing the engine rumbling as Papyrus parks close by the sidewalk is a blessing in and of itself; the aforementioned date night with his brother can't get here any sooner. You need to sort your thoughts out once and for all. Almost half a year of waltzing with the seemingly never-ending issue of Frisk's journey and the bonds they made through it was far too much. If you were slowly making friends with those same people too, then you needed to stop this at once. No matter how much you wanted to avoid said confrontation, that had to be done -- for both CPS and reasons beyond.

"You're right." You huff, bring a hand to your forehead, and go lower to massage the brim of your nose. Not a moment after, you fix your glasses, look back to their side, and form a smile. "Thank you, dear."

• • •

You close your eyes just before the monster presses a damp cotton ball to your wound.

Isopropyl makes it sting immediately, yet you're too busy with your thoughts to care about it that much.

"You okay?" Sans asks, meeting your eyes when you open them. "You've been quiet since we got 'ere."

"I'm okay, but..." You think back to how you greeted him with a wave, right as you did with his brother. While the monster before you didn't seem to mind it, you can't avoid the thought of how you used to be with Jerry. It was easier to be more affectionate back then, and it was easier still greeting him with a kiss -- be it a simple one on the cheek or a quick one on the lips. Now, you can't so much as imagine the prospect of doing that with your new partner without overthinking or feeling stressed about it. "I was wondering if we... if we should maybe keep our relationship private -- f- for now?"

He finishes wrapping the bandages and fixes them tight before replying with, "That's fine with me. Did you watch the video?"

"No, I'm..." You grow short of breath at the thought of how many people have likely seen it by now -- how many times it's been shared, and how many more discussions and heated arguments have revolved around it. "I'm too scared to."

You can't bring yourself to look at him any longer, so his expression falls unknown as he suggests watching it together, a question you answer to with a quiet and mumbled 'sure'.

Sans proceeds with a nod and stores all the items used back into the first aid kit before taking out his phone, settling down in bed, and holding your hand with his free one. "Really sure?" he asks, squeezing it once. You reply with an even quieter 'yes' and watch in silence as he clicks on the link sent by what you assume is several people, based on how Undyne, Brenda, and even the man from the train station -- now his friend and your co-worker -- have messaged him the same information, all three left unread. The one he chooses is farther back and dated with yesterday, this one sent by Jerry.

It plays in an instant and the first thing to appear is Asgore's garden, while murmurs are what compose the audio as the one filming shows himself around a field of trampled flowers, these now a mess of broken pots, thrashed earth, and missing rocks. A few others make him company and engage in small talk, though it ends quickly when one of them shouts for everyone to 'get over here quick'. The group does as told, leading for the cameraman to rush along with them out of the garden and into the Judgement Hall. The audio grows quiet as he ventures further, steps and voices now discreet as he films a fuzzy image of two people sitting at one of the benches laid around, with the exception that one sits on top and has their arms wrapped firm and tight around the other. Multiple people urge the cameraman to approach the scene more, making him show you and Sans kissing, albeit of a blurry quality with how much he has to zoom in so as to not be caught. Even the noise is recorded with how silent everything else is, this one mostly composed of hitched breaths and clothing shuffling against each other as you hug him closer. Thankfully, no kissing noises are recorded, something you assume is due to him having a shapeable skull rather than lips, along with how slow and careful your actions are.

The video ends when the kiss does, and it leaves you in the same silence created right before clicking on it.

Regardless, Sans opens up the page it was posted on to reveal more information about the creator.

'Am I the only one who sees something wrong with this stuff? This is the future that awaits us, if we continue to act as if we can live peacefully with these people. Opposing these changes is necessary, if we wish to keep our normalcy. Casual make outs with a being so far from human shouldn't be the norm of our world', reads the caption.

Below, some of the replies read from ones saying the poster isn't the only one who shares those thoughts, to ones who've taken the time to write an entire paragraph about the situation.

'🤢🤮'

'Absolutely not.'

'No, you're not. This is outright hideous.'

'Click here to see my 👄 HOT 🔥 noods 🍝: www.uhohspaghettios.xd'

'Wow, this is just like 1984.'

'Next thing you know, we'll be the ones living in the Underground.'

'I need eye bleach ASAP!!! 😱'

'Yeah, no. Hard pass on whatever the hell I just watched. Why did you even film this?'

'That skeleman is nothing but a closeted cradle-robber. Anyone who's met (Y/N) knows how naïve and childish they are, and them dating someone like that screams bad news. Forget that he's a monster, people! What's more important here's how he's got a liking for them despite that gap -- both mentally AND physically. He should be ashamed for bringing their reputation even further down with this video. At this point, I have trouble believing they'll ever recover from all this.'

'...Ok, but...... Am I the only one who finds this kinda.................. Hot? 👀💦'

'Of course, even a monster would try to have his way with someone like them. Look at how they're dressed!'

'To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand how wrong this stuff is. The degeneracy infesting the Surface nowadays is extremely subtle, and without a solid knowledge of social sciences, most of the immorality will go over a typical person's head. There's also the skeleton's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation -- his personal philosophy draws heavily from George Orwell literature, for instance. People like us understand this stuff; we have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these social rejects, to realise that they're not just ridiculous -- they say something deep about LIFE and SOCIETY. As a consequence, people who see nothing wrong with this truly ARE idiots -- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in the skeleton's existential catchphrase "Genocide is wrong", which itself is a cryptic reference to Er*n Yeag*r from Att*ck on Tit*n. I'm smirking right now, just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as our fight against this backwards evolution unfolds itself on their phone screens. What fools... How I pity anyone who disagrees with you and tries to defend this behaviour. 😂'

At the bottom of it all, a neglected comment reads:

'Not only are you and your companions trespassing in an unsafe location, but your recording shows clear evidence you were damaging former King Asgore Dreemurr's property. You have also chosen to film these people without their knowledge despite them being in a private area, and uploaded the footage to a massive social media platform, as well. This is punishable by law, and I will not hesitate to stand for these people, if they decide to file a lawsuit against you.'

What stands out the most goes beyond the commenter's name, as his profile picture is what captures your attention first, regardless of how well-dressed he appears in the image and how small it is without clicking on it. Sans seems to share the same thought as you, as he clicks on the man's account without thinking twice. It takes some time to load, but when it does, your mouth gapes and you find yourself at a complete loss for words.

'Gerardo "Jerry" Gonzalez Gutierrez del Valle. Family practice lawyer since 20XX. Co-founder of the first Alcohol and Smoking Helpline for monsters. Former quarterback for Ebott U's Football League,' his bio reads.

You're overcome by what feels like an hour of silence before you can process what you've read. The age-old experience of reviewing material from your textbook at three thirty in the morning arrives when you try to read through his profile a second time, then a third. Even his pictures are difficult to process, these a variety of him posing with his co-workers at the newly-opened helpline building, screenshots of his progress with quitting alcohol and his strike of days and months sober, images of him in different suits, and -- last but not least -- a couple of Throwback Thursdays from his glory days, featuring both high school and college memories. It's hard to decide which feeling out of multiple is stronger than the rest, as jealousy combines with the slightest thing you expect out of this discovery: being reminded of the good ol' days. Guilt arrives next when growing aware of your current relationship with the one sitting next to you, even if it's only the thought of how happy you used to be with the man in those pictures before everything went haywire.

"You're... You're seeing this too, right?"

You hear him chuckle and see him agree with a nod, though you can't exactly fall back down to Earth again; were this a dream, you would accept it as such.

"Yeah." The monster looks you over once before adding, "And am I imagining it, or did I catch you smilin' at 'im just now?" He winks.

"So you're telling me you're really not surprised by this, at all?"

"...Touché."

You stand up and give your back to him, irked by his assumption despite him being nothing close to serious about it. "But, please don't think I still like him." Your hands turn into fists at the thought of going back with someone like him, no matter his current intentions. "I still haven't forgiven him, and I still..." Bile rises to your throat as your stomach churns wildly. "I still hate him." Then, you take a pause to gather strength. "And maybe that's a strong word, b- but... It's hard for me to forget that's the same man who once accused me for every little thing that wasn't 'normal' with Frisk, from them running away the first time, to them refusing to call him dad -- even when I never prevented them from visiting him, and e- even when he stopped visiting them first." Your chest shakes as you huff. "I... I still dislike him, and I really hate that I remembered good things about him just now."

Your mouth refuses to shut up and makes you continue on with, "So if I still can't forgive him, how can I make a decision for CPS with so many of you and in so short of a time? I still can't decide what to do, no... no matter how much I've learnt about everyone else." Your throat turns dry, and you find it difficult to swallow. "Hell, it was only yesterday I finally gave into one of my doubts. I thought it twice before asking if you wanted to kiss, but it'd been in my mind for a long while before that."

"You're sayin' the kiss was you decidin' to trust me?"

"Yes."

He scoots closer to your side and furrows his gaze.

"Even after that dream, and even though I started it?"

"Y... Yes." You do the same as him and smile. "I trust you, and... And I know the dream's likely just me overthinking this. One thing's spilling the truth when you're drunk, and one thing's getting... too caught up in your fears -- to the point where you have these warped dreams about someone else, no matter how much they mean to you."

His irises soften in their light, and a hint of culpability seems to fall on him. "Then I'm sorry for bringin' your ex into this." You sit back down with him and hold his hand again. "It wasn't right."

"It's okay."

"Doesn't look that way."

Before you know it, you're held by your lower back, pulled close, and brought down in bed.

He stays on top, gaze focused on yours rather than on your lips or anywhere else suggesting something more.

"Have you found that help yet? Counseling, I mean." His gaze remains the same despite having changed topics so abruptly. "How're ya doin', puddin'?"

"Bubbles and Brenda suggested two recently, but I... I still haven't gotten around to calling either one of them."

"Want me to make you company while you try that now? We've got time."

"...Kiss me first, please?"

He lowers more and presses his teeth to your neck.

"Gladly."

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[wornoutmouse]

Im making this gender neutral cause I feel like I did pretty damn good here. And it had a bit of a fairytale ending but I couldn't figure how else to tie it up prettily

Also tried of tumbler adding gaps to all the paragraphs when i copy and paste from docs to here so y'all just gonna have to deal. this fic is way too damn long for me to fix it like i normally do

Also i went over the aparent limit so just look for the words "pt2" in green for the extension

Letting go is one of the hardest things one can do. But understanding why you had to let go is harder.

You and Izuku knew each other for the longest time. Hell you were the one that lifted him back up when Bakugou knocked him down. So why…. Why after all that were you not good enough?

He never said you weren't, he'd never do that. But the worthlessness you felt as you watched her hand him a love letter. You thought, he won't accept, afterall she's one of the many girls and guys that had confessed since the beginning of U.A. Hell you were surprised Ochaco even had the guts to confess.

But the small blush and smile that overcame his face as he finished reading the letter, was one you've never seen before. In that moment you wished you'd decline coming with him for support.

The sick feeling in your stomach grew larger as they hugged each other tightly. That sickness translated into a smile when he looked back at you.

From then on, your sunny disposition was a fabrication of what once was. You didn't hate her, you even saw the appeal, having the slightest crush on her as well. You just hated that he chose her. Was the years of companionship worthless?

As the two grew closer, you grew farther and buried yourself in training and school work. Days went by, months, and by the time graduation came, you were all 3rd years.  You and Deku had become nothing more than aquaintences.

The others tried to stop your descent into isolation, Including you in everything they did, ut it wasn't the same.

"Hey Y/n." You wiped your sweat with the towel around your neck. You'd been at it for most of the day and had shed most of your clothes. Izuku was dressed casual for once and looked gorgeous in the setting sun.

"Yes Midoriya?" Ouch. When did you start calling him that? You couldn't quite remember. Deku looked over the trees, green hair blowing with fall wind. "You know we haven't hung out in a while." You took a drink of water as you sat on a fallen log. "Oh really?" 

That came out harsher than needed and you both knew it. "Since we are graduating tomorrow, I was wondering if you would join us for once as a last farewell. 

You didn't miss the undertone in the last comment. Deku watched in silence as you put your tank top back on. "I don't think I can make it."

Izuku's fists clenched as he glared at the floor. "Why?" You eyed his fists,"I have other things to do." Deku scoffed, "Give me a break, school is over what more do you have to do?!" "More important stuff than partying."

There was a change in the air and at the last minute, you jumped back as Deku's foot slammed down in the floor causing a sizable crater. "Stop lying Y/N! What could you possibly have to do that's more important than hanging out with your friends?! Don't you understand that this is the last time we'll have this much free time to see each other!?"

A small smirk crawled onto your face. 'Still a crybaby huh?'  tears trailed down Deku's face as he looked at you, "We haven't talked in years y/n." You would not break, this was for the best, you would not fall back into this cycle. "We talked this morning." "Hello is not a conversation y/n"

"What do you want me to do then Izuku?" 

Nothing, just like you expected. "Listen Deku, Sometimes, people grow apart and..." You have to take a deep breath, cause if you don't you'd break all over again. "Sometimes we just have to accept it." 

Izuku says nothing more and leaves, heartheavy. During the party,  Izuku spent his time with Uraraka, both day-dreaming about their future, though Izuku wasn't as engaged as he usually was. You sat alone in the common room, looking down at the feastivities below. Mr. Aizawa was the only one who noticed.

As a pro hero you stayed in a moderate range in regards to popularity. About the same level that Mt. Lady and Kamui Woods used to be. 

Watching Bakugou and Midoriya's ranking teeter back and forth like hot potato was amusing as the fiery blond would call you to complain since he knew you would simply listen.

Your love life was non-existent besides the occasional fling with a cute chick at a bar or a himbo™ at the local gym. You weren't looking for anything sold anyways and that was not only due to your hero work, but because no one peaks your interests.

The gang of course flocked together in regards to their love lives. Kaminari and Jiro were finally a thing. Momo and Todoroki were dropping hints to each other but they are both a bunch of oblivious bimbos and that is not going to change anytime soon. 

Tsu and surprisingly Mineta prefered the bachelor life and worked hard on building their teams. You were greatly surprised when Mineta asked you to come to his house and genuinely asked your opinion on trainees. 

Unlike the rest, Mina, Kirishima and Bakugou, were trying to figure out the ins and outs of a poly relationship. Bakgou of course being the word if reason as the other two goofed around.

 All was in its place as you all conformed to your new adult lives. You had no faint clue where the other boys were besides Kouji's and Satou's engagement.

It was a Thursday evening when you walked into your condo, shuffling through your mail until a white envelope with gold trimming for your attention. 

You are invited….

Of course how could you forget Deku and Uraraka. When was the last time you saw those two? Most likely the last day of school. How the hell did they get your address?

You tossed the envelope on the couch and walked to your kitchen to get a bottle of wine. You spent that evening drinking the petty thoughts away, altering between cursing Ochako, to reminiscing on how they were truly a match made in heaven.

By 4 in the evening, you were beyond tipsy and could barely stand to answer the door when the bell rung. 

"Whatdoya want Midoriya?" You said, leaning a little too far to the left. Deku looked at you with concerned eyes. "Are you drunk y/n?" Your roll your eyes and turn around, walking back into your home. "What does it look like?" 

You slump on the couch as Deku walks throughout your home. He was alot bigger  than you remembered. His curly green hair was almost touching your ceiling as he looked at your disheveled body.

"I'm just here to make sure you got my invitation." You tug the envelope from where it fell between the cushion and wavs it in front of your face. Izuku acknowledged it as he sat down, "Well are you coming?"

You shrugged your shoulders as you reach for your glass. Izuku tried to take it away and you smack his hand. Even though you could taste the unresolved tension, you wanted to make things a bit lighter. "I don't know deku, what's the theme? If it's green then I can't come, you know that clashes with my complexion."

He doesn't laugh, not even a smile. Oh well not your problem. The bottle is empty much to your disappointment as you held the opening over your mouth. Deku sits there, fists on his knees as he makes a conflicted face. "How many bottles have you drunk?"

You slap his back, slightly impressed that his solid form didn't move. "Oh calm down worry wort!" A lazy grin comes over your face and a teasing tone slips into your voice. "I'm not an alcoholic...mmm, yet."

You both sat in silence, Deku swirling in his own emotions for  seeing you this way. You looked completely fine on the surface but he knew you better. They all knew you better. Bakugou's weekly gossip visits were nothing more than a check on your personal health.  Even Mineta had to pitch in.

"Hey Deku?" You looked off into thin air as you spoke but Izuku hung off your every word. 

"Can you kiss me?"

Deku didn't mean to stand up the way he did. You didn't react, you expected it if anything. "Y/n, you know I can't do that. Why would you even ask!?" You rubbed your eyes to rid yourself of the smallest threat of tears. You weren't an emotional drunk and you weren't going to start being one now.

"Mm just thought that if you did, maybe I could get over this fuzzy feeling in ma'chest." Deku blushed, from what you. didn't know, but you did notice how he sat back next to you, closer than before. "If I do…..will you come?"

I was going to come either way idiot

"I'll think about it."

Your lidded eyes picked up on the smallest movements and you shivered as Izuku held your chin between his fingers. The kiss was gentle and nothing more than a simple press. You would have been fine with that, that's all you wanted. What you weren't expecting was for Deku to continue.

You could feel your chest flair with the familiar discomfort of things being out of your control. His rough hands came home to your face as he deepened the kiss. You couldn't help but let out a small whimper as his tongue swiped against your bottom lip and he took that chance to delve deeper.

No

You pushed him away and stood. You both looked at each other, darkened eyes and veins fluttering with adrenaline. "Why?" you whispered, voice betraying you as it cracked. Izuku held his fist over his heart where you pushed him. "I..I did what you asked." You shook your head.

No, no this is wrong

Izuku stands up and tries to console you. The words that left his lips unrecognizable.

It's over isn't it?

"Y/n calm down please and let's talk." You put your hands over your ears. "You're so selfish." You wheezed. Why was the room getting darker?

It's over isn't it?

Strong hands grip your arms and you scrape them off. "Get out."

You won and he chose you

As a last resort, Deku tries to kiss you again, holding you close back your lower back, even daring to nibble your lips as he pulls away. "Y/n can you please focus!?" Why was he making it worse? You are not a home wrecker!!

And he loves you so he's gone

Izuku helplessly watched you fall into your own thoughts as you gripped the wall so hard your knuckles turned white. 

It's over isn't it?

You blindly stumble into your room and close the door, falling against it.

Why can't I move on?

Izuku tested his forehead against the door, trying to listen for any sign of life, even a heart beat. On the other side you fall into a dreamless sleep.

War and Glory

It rained on their wedding day. And in the worst way possible or made the ceremony even more beautiful as light drops of water tangled itself in Uraraka's veil. 

The pictures were to die for and so was the food. "Y/n come on, take a picture with me!" You sip some champagne and prepare yourself for your sin  free facade as you walk over to the new bride.

Her dress was gorgeous yet modest, one would confuse this gathering for a party since you were forced to wear white  with her and Deku despite you explaining  how weddings worked.

You kneeled to adjust to her height as she held the camera the highest she could. "You want me to do it?"  You took the phone and held it above you. Ochaco pouted as you dwarfed her and gripped her small hands on the front of your clothes.

She smelt of strawberry's and soap. 

Reinvention

Before you could pull away, she tugged your down as she came to whisper in your ear. "I know." She pulled away with the same small smile she wore since the day began. Your face mirrored one of fright and she quickly noticed.

She raised her hands in surrender as she tried to calm you down. "Hey what's that face for, it's fin-" you flinched as she reached out to touch you. Backing up, you ran into Deku who quickly held onto you to prevent you from falling.

You do your best to calmly untangle yourself from him, but subsequently jumping away as if you were on fire. The newly weds shared a look and you shivered as they both narrowed their eyes at you. Focused the same way they were when on a mission.

Fusion

Walking through the crowd of fans and distant family was no hard feat as you headed to the hotel the wedding was taking place behind. The two followed you and you tried your damnedest not to simply run.

You had almost made it out conservation free but Deku's hand quickly slapped on the side of the door before you could close it and he forced his way in as a limping Ochaco followed behind. "Come on Y/N, these heels are uncomfortable!" 

You could feel tears falling down your face as you backed away from the two. It wasn't out of fear, but shame. Shame that you had feelings for your friend. Shame that you kissed a taken and engaged man. Shame that his  wife knew.

"Y/n calm down it's fine, I don't mind!" You looked at her with confusion and bristled as Deku came closer. "I told her the day after it happened." You focus on Ochaco, preparing yourself for any physical attacks the small woman might deem necessary. "I'm sorry Ochaco, I-I didn't mean for it t-to happen."

Anger at the memory filled your brain and you almost didn't notice small hands taking hold of yours.

Her attention

"It's okay Y/N." Ochaco smiled warmly at you, bringing your hands to her lips as she kissed them gently. "I don't mind, infact this was the goal for a long time." You look at Deku for some coherent conversation, "What is she talking about."

Izuku blushed, "We've been trying to get your attention since highschool. We knew how you felt and didn't mind you joining us like Kachan, Kiri, and Mina." A steely gaze with the power of Aizawa's death glare, casted over Izuku's face, "But you kept running."

Ochaco waved her hands to divert the sudden hostile energy. "Anyways, we were planning on announcing it at the flower toss." Ochaco reached into her bussom and pulled out a small jewelry case. Inside it held a silver ring, strikingly similar to the one she now wore on her left hand.

"I know we really haven't got to get to know each other that well. And I know your feelings don't lie for me but, if you would like…" Deku gingerly plucked the ring from Uraraka's hands and the both lowered to their knees. (Ochaco with more effort as the fluff of her dress almost tipped her over)

Oop looks like i went over the limit?

[hoe-doroki]

stay

A response to this ask:

Reader having a silent mental breakdown and trying to hide it with Bakugo and iida!( bakugo’s fine if not iida)

warning: detailed descriptions of panic attack, self-loathing

pairing: Bakugou x gn!reader

genre: hurt/comfort

word count: 2.2k

edit: I no longer write x reader but here’s my old masterlist - mobile | desktop

It seemed stupid to have any kind of mental illness around someone like Bakugou.

Bakugou had experienced near death multiple times by his mid-twenties had had witnessed the worst of the world first hand. His teens had been littered with trauma and, as an adult, his work was constantly throwing him into circumstances where his body, his life was at risk. He did this day in and day out and it wasn’t even a question. He survived it all and, more than that, he let the world think it was easy.

Sometimes just getting out of bed wasn’t easy for you.

You felt like your body was rotting. You’d been on the couch all day and it smelled stale from the layers of lazy sweat you’d gotten on it. From the shower you hadn’t taken and the hair you hadn’t touched. But was it rot from the outside in—something a bit of soap and buffing could slough off—or was it the inside out? Harder to reach, harder to fix. As your brain sent your every thought clenching on your veins, your vital organs, you couldn’t help but wonder if it was both. Rotted from the inside out and the outside in.

You tensed when you heard the door to your shared apartment click, a key being shoved into the lock. Over the cold numbness that you’d felt all day, a shot of panic sprinted through your bloodstream as a million ways to lie popped into your head. You popped off the couch and tried to think of a way to look busy, so you ran to the kitchen and started boiling some water.

This was something Bakugou couldn’t see. The last thing you wanted, the last thing he needed was for you to be another person that he had to save. Another person to risk himself for.

You eyed Bakugou when he came in, shoulders drooped, gait wide. He looked tired, but otherwise normal. You usually tried not to worry yourself with the cuts and scrapes he often showed up with after work, and, so long as he was walking, he usually told you to calm down and that he was fine. You weren’t going to test it today.

“Hi, babe,” you said, putting strained effort into your pitch, your tone, your face. Maybe your voice was too high, maybe the smile spread a bit too wide, so you turned back to the water, watching it heat.

“Hi,” Bakugou greeted as he kicked off his sneakers, voice gravely as it usually was after a shift. He was in civilian clothes now, having showered and changed at the agency. A black tee and jeans that never fit quite right on his narrow hips and tall frame. “What’re you up to?”

“Oh, I, um…” You looked down at the water, still cool enough to stick a finger into. You’d done nothing all day, having skipped out on all your classes with half-assed emails sent to the teachers. The idea of going had been too much to take—for reasons you had no language for—so you’d wallowed on the couch as the hours of the day had bled away. So the question felt like an interrogation about to put a scalpel to your flaws. “I’m just heating some water for tea. Was gonna get started on dinner.”

“What were you gonna make?”

Bakugou was in the kitchen now, coming up behind you to press a kiss against your temple. Your heart rate increased but not in the good way. Not in the way that it should. Instead of flutters it was pounding, smacking against your ribs in a reminder that he was too close, you were too visible—you might explode and you would hurt him.

“I, um, I wasn’t sure,” you said, the answer sending shameful heat to your cheeks. And then you were slapped the other way by how stupid that was. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

“Okay,” Bakugou said, going to the fridge. “I’m sure we can figure something out.”

Bakugou was always insistent on having a stocked fridge. With his job and you in your master’s program it was hard to find the time to grocery shop, much less eat consistent meals together, but those were the kinds of things that Bakugou prioritized. The things behind his sharp persona and shrinking legacy of reckless anger that made him a good boyfriend. An amazing partner and enviable roommate.

And what did you offer him? Emotional instability without just cause? A nascent—at best—career while he was climbing the pro hero charts every cycle?

Who were you kidding? You hadn’t even gone to class. You hadn’t done any of the work that you needed to do—the evening was a wash now, so you wouldn’t catch up. You were just wasting everyone’s time, like you always did.

“Hey, babe?”

By the tone of his voice, you realized that Bakugou had called you multiple times. Your eyes flicked toward him, but your head felt heavy to lift. “Hmm?” you asked, squeezing every last bit of breath into that hum.

“The water’s boiling.” Bakugou walked over to you, two mugs with teabags slumped at the bottom. He set them on the counter and put a hand on your shoulder, turning you a degree closer to him.

“Oh,” you intoned, pulling away and turning off the fire. Stupid. You were about to grab the pot when Bakugou dropped his hand down to your elbow, giving a firm squeeze.

“Are you okay?”

You ignored his gesture to stop and reached for the kettle, putting all of your effort into keeping your hands steady as you poured hissing water in one mug and then the other. Doing something was the only thing keeping you upright as your thoughts continued to swirl in your head poisoning each brain cell you had. You hadn’t done anything worth living for today. But goddamn it, if you couldn’t make these mugs of tea, then you should just walk out of the apartment and let Bakugou be better off without you.

“Woah, woah, what’s happening?”

Bakugou’s hand was on your chin as he pulled your face a little too roughly towards him. Or, rather, it wouldn’t have been rough, if you weren’t resisting it. But you didn’t want him to look you in the eye. See what a failure you were. Someone who couldn’t even overcome a bad emotional day to go to class while he’d been out saving lives—as usual. He took the pot from your white-knuckled grip and set it on the stove.

“Why are you crying?”

Were you? You hurriedly brushed a hand under your eyes and they came away slick, the water hot as the tea you were steeping.

“The…The steam…” you started, prepared to lie and lie and lie until there was nothing real left. The real stuff was too hard to hold. “I think…It just must have irri…tated my eyes.”

Your breathing was running away with you, chest heaving as you pulled away and faced the other direction. Your attempts were thin, too threadbare to hide behind. And your boyfriend wasn’t nearly stupid enough to be fooled, even by your best efforts.

“Babe, tell me what’s wrong,” Bakugou said forcibly, stepping around to face you again.

His eyes were searching for yours, but you held fisted hands to your cheek as you turned away from him. Now you could feel the tears streaming, and you couldn’t turn them off. But what was there to tell him? That you were just a big, stupid idiot who cried for no reason? That watching him become a better man only emphasized how totally shit you were? That when the two of you were on the street together, you knew that people wondered what a guy like him was doing with a person like you?

“I just want you to stop crying,” Bakugou said, and you could hear him getting desperate, only making you feel worse. You were biting your lips closed to keep the sobs from tearing out, but that only made embarrassing little huffs come out your nose, whimpers sneak past the back of your throat.

You couldn’t stop crying. How could you stop it when you didn’t understand what had started it?

“I’ll just,” you hiccupped, backing away from him. “Just give me…I’ll be fine, just give me a minute.”

“Fuck that,” Bakugou said, grabbing your wrist. “Do you want me to go because you want me to go, or because you think you deserve to be alone?”

The words felt like a trick, a riddle from some fairytale turned nightmare intended to make you fail either way. Telling him the truth would trap him in whatever trip wires had you tied in knots right now. But, at the same time, he was expecting the lie. He wasn’t letting you save him from this.

But why? He was always saving people. Why, for once, couldn’t you save him from you?

“Idiot,” Bakugou said, pulling you in to him. You cried harder, the weight of your failure dropping in your well and spilling more tears out of you. “Why would I leave you alone?”

A sob crashed out, breaking through haphazard letters of attempted defense. He needed to go; him seeing you like this only made it worse.

“It, um,” Bakugou’s voice was low, a register that was unfamiliar even to you, unsteady and unrehearsed. “It seems easier to be alone. I know it does. But…you’ve shown me that’s not true, so just. Let me show you the same, okay?”

You could feel how hard he was trying as he pressed you into his chest and you finally, finally let him. The sobbing made you weak in the knees, light in the head, but he held you. He held you up, held you close, and he wasn’t letting go.

Everyone always talked about how crying felt good. About it being a release that helped you process your pain. And maybe that was right when talking about grief or loss, but not this. These tears felt like nothing more than splashing in the masturbatory wallowing hole of your self pity. Embarrassing and stupid.

“Why?” you finally whispered when the sobs subsided a bit, letting you keep enough of the air in to at least say that.

For a moment, Bakugou didn’t say anything, and you wondered if you’d imagined the words. If you were imagining the whole thing and he really had left like you’d wanted. But then you heard breath catch in the back of his throat as he seemed to try and fail to find the words a couple of times.

“In another world,” he finally started. “I’d come home from a day of work fucking exhausted, slump on the couch, eat, and pack it in to go to bed before starting all over the next day. And I’d probably be fine with that. But I’d be a fucking idiot, because coming home to you makes it worth coming home.”

Your breathing was steadying as he talked and you could feel the tears cooling against your cheek, against his wet t-shirt.

“Even with you looking like a damn mess like this,” Bakugou said and you could hear the smile in his voice. His smile, which had grown less rare over time, was always so wide that it made his words sound different. Warmer. They managed to draw a haggard chuckle out of you. “I’m happier just to be around you than convincing myself that being lonely at the top is the best way.”

“I don’t want to drag you down from the top,” you said. “Your company shouldn’t be dead weight.”

“Dead weight?” Bakugou repeated, pulling back to look at you. “Dumbass.”

He pulled you in again, both of his arms around the back of your head so that you were nearly smothered in his chest.

“That’s the stupidest fucking shit I’ve ever heard. You’re fucking incredible, and if that’s why you’re crying today, then you and me have to do some talking.”

Another laugh managed to crawl its way out of you and Bakugou let you pull back to breathe again.

“Are you okay now?”

‘Okay’ felt like such a far ways away. But you were above water again. Somewhere next to okay, distance undetermined.

“I’m surviving,” you decided.

Bakugou looked at you, a couple different things flashing over his eyes, too quickly for you to identify. “Well, that’ll do for now, but we’re not settling for that. Just talk to me. I’m not the best at this, but…I want to be better at it.”

In that moment, you remembered that Bakugou wasn’t perfect either. That he constantly had voices in his head telling him that he wasn’t doing enough and, not only that, he had the public constantly critiquing his attitude, his skills, his work. That, to some degree, this was already something you were going through together.

“I think you’re better at it than you think.”

Bakugou smiled again, this one not so wide, but more private. “You too, he said. Whatever bullshit you’re telling yourself—you’re better than you think.”

He pulled you in close again, and this time you sunk into it, enjoying his warm muscles, the way that his hair was still a little damp from the shower. You weren’t sure if anything had changed—all your problems were still present as they’d ever been. But yet, there was one thing. Now, with Bakugou’s arms like a buttress to your shaky but standing foundation, you, paradoxically, hoped that he would stay and stay and stay.

[xpeachesncream]

acquainted | you choose to stay

> series masterlist | series playlist <

summary: the biggest goal of a grad student is to get through school in one piece - no petty drama involved, no sweating over the little things. however, that plan almost always never follows through. sometimes, you can’t help but fall into the most unthinkable, unexpected traps and learn the hard way. like, exhibit a: being unable to resist your engaged, substitute teacher, kim seokjin.

pairing: reader x engaged!teacher!seokjin

genre: grad school au, student life au | fluff, angst, smut

words: 2.5k

warnings: cussing/mature language, soft smut, some breast and clit play, slight begging, multiple orgasms, honestly more so into the soft love-making over anything rough

notes: we’ve made it to the end 🥺 yes - there is an option for you to choose to leave as well, please check the masterlist if you don’t catch the post alone! ily all, thank you for sticking through the series! stay tuned for bands, it’ll be just as much of a crazy ride! 💘

tags: @laurynne5 @yiyi4657 @miinoongi @teamtardis-notdead@bluesharksandfish@photographic-girl @yonkoghan @moonchild1​ @thebeebi​ @brightcolorsoffendme​

"Jin?" You ask as he slowly turns around, his expression warm and inviting. He carried a huge bouquet of flowers in front of him, so huge it almost covered that small smile he gave off.

"Y/N."

"W-what're you doing here? How'd you know when I'd be home?" Ryujin.

He scratched his head nervously and chuckled. "Ryujin."

"Figures." You chuckle.

"These are for you, I got them at the farmer's market earlier. I saw them and thought of you." You smile as you take the bouquet and bring it close to your nose. They smelled sweet, and fresh. Just like Jin. "I, uh, was hoping we could talk."

"Sure." You nod as he takes your duffle bag from you while waiting for you to open your door. You set the flowers aside in the vase, Jin dropping your things in the living room before making his way over to the couch.

"How was spending time back home?"

"Good, much needed." You looked up from the vase. "What did you do this weekend?"

"Not much. Spend some time with Jungkook." You nod, feeling relieved that they had been able to spend time together and slowly fix their relationship.

"That sounds nice. I'm glad you two are fixing things."

"Slowly but surely." You make your way over to the couch and sit next to him, your thigh touching his. "How's school been?"

"Fine, not the same since you left though." He chuckled.

"Sorry I, uh--" He looks at you. "I had my reasons." You nod, knowing full well what those reasons were.

"It's okay, you don't have to explain." You give him a toothless smile. "So, what's up?" You ask, as if you didn't have things to say to him yourself. He slowly tilts his head to look at you, lips slightly parted before speaking. His eyes tell you everything you need to know. He missed you. And you missed him too.

"I'm just going to come out and say it." He says softly. "I miss you, Y/N. I-I can't keep going on like this, you know? Without you. You're not gonna be the one that gets away. I refuse to tell that story in the long run because you matter too much to me." He sighs. "I love you, and I'm here for you. I want to do this with you, and I know we didn't exactly have that fairytale meeting or whatever that even fucking means Jin, get it together." He shakes his head at his own words, causing you to softly chuckle to yourself. "But I'm always going to be by your side, and I'll never give up on you, or us. My past actions haven't exactly said that but I'm sure about you, about this. More than I've ever been before." He grabs your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. "Please let me love you." You don't even know what to say, or, I guess it's just that Jin has said all the right things. Everything that needed to be said. You didn't need to say anything else.

So, you silently cup his cheek and bring his face to yours, planting a soft kiss on his plump lips before pulling back to look at him. He smiles, his hand is now holding onto yours, his thumb rubbing the top of your hand. He leans in for another kiss, his lips slowly parting from yours when he pulls away.

"Sooooo is that a yes?" He breaks the silence, causing you to giggle and fall back onto the couch.

"Yeah, it is."

"Okay." He smiles, the dimples from underneath his eyes poking out. "In that case, will you also allow me to cater to you today?"

"Hm, what does that involve, Seokjin?"

"Come with me, you'll see."

"Okay." You respond softly with a smile. Jin sits silently, watching the TV while you clean up a bit and grab a few things before heading out. The car ride is silent, and you realize Jin is taking you back to his place.

It definitely feels a little weird and different being here, now that you don't see Grace's car in the driveway, nor do you see any pictures of the two or anything that signals Grace in general. You follow Jin into his room, setting your things off to the side as he takes off his jacket. He comes to you, cupping your face in his hands before placing a kiss on your lips.

"Come, I wanna cook something for you." He nods you to follow him to the kitchen. You sit at the island, watching him prep his ingredients together and begin to prepare whatever dish he had in mind. He had began to update you on the past couple of weeks, which wasn't much, but he still figured he'd tell you how work was going, or how his friends were doing. Namjoon being completely caught up with Ryujin.

You continued to watch how delicate he was, cooking a meal for the both of you. He pulled out two tupperwares and a few smaller ones, slipping the freshly cooked meal into the bigger containers before getting a few snacks into the small containers. You furrowed your brows, wondering what in the hell he was doing, and why you couldn't just eat here.

"What are you doing?" You chuckled.

"We're not eating here." He looked at you before fixing the food into the containers.

"Where are we eating then?"

"Don't worry about it."

"Jin."

"Y/N?" He says, his brow slightly raised. "Just relax. I think you'll enjoy it." You nod silently as he packs them into a canvas reusable bag that he pulls off of the hook on his wall. He removes his apron and hangs it onto a free hook before putting his jacket on again. "You want another jacket?"

"Will I freeze to death in this outfit?" You stand and he looks at you up and down. Granted, the sun was out and it was a nice day out. You just threw on some grey-ish Gymshark leggings and its matching sports bra under a cream-colored puffer jacket.

"Ummmm." He says continuing to eye you up and down. God, he wanted you.

"Earth to Jin?" You cross your arms and tilt your head, making him snap out of it with a chuckle.

"No, you should be fine. I'll make sure it's warm enough for you."

"You're too much."

"Sorry, you just look really good in those leggings."

"Uh huh." You playfully roll your eyes and grab the canvas bag from his hand. He leads the way to his Audi SUV, opening your door before situating himself into the driver's seat. The sun was slowly setting, and Jin took you over the bridge and into San Francisco. Except not, because his car continued to drive off towards the Peninsula. He took the exit towards Pacifica and it suddenly clicked in your head - he was taking you to the beach to eat. In this weather though? You hoped not. He said you'd be fine in your outfit, but you were starting to think he planned it all along just because he liked how good you looked. But, you sat silently, letting him take you to the final destination. The sky was now filled with dark orange hues, one side of the sky quickly darkening before the other.  He turns onto a road, about three houses lining the road way before there's a patch of dirt and a car or two parked facing towards the water in front of you. The cars were pretty spaced out, Jin finding his own spot to park into - the only thing blocking the car from the heavy waves in front of you was a flimsy, rusty railing and a small stone wall. He gets out and immediately pops the trunk open, laying his back seats down and spreading out a few blankets he had hidden in the trunk before calling you over.

"Come join me." You hop out and sit next to him, tucking yourselves away in the opened trunk, watching the waters roll in and crash against the wall.

"Oh shit, this is beautiful." You say. You never knew of this spot, and it was isolated from the main beach itself. It was nice to have some privacy, but also get this front row view of the water.

"Isn't it?" He wraps another blanket around your shoulders for you to snuggle into before laying out the food in front of you both. The sun is about to sink into the horizon as you quietly start to dig into the food, thanking Jin in between chewing for the amazing dinner he had prepared for you two. He uncapped a bottle of wine, mainly for your enjoyment, pouring it into a fancy plastic  cup. He pressed his back against the side of the trunk, allowing you to crawl in between his legs and get comfortable while you sipped on the wine and picked at the grapes he brought. He leaned his head back, his arms wrapped around your neck, holding you tightly as you both watched and listened to the waves.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For all of this."

"It's no biggie." He says softly, your temple resting against his jaw. "I don't think you'll ever understand how much you mean to me. You make me feel complete." He turns to place a kiss against it, causing you to sink deeper into his body. For a moment, you both are just still. In peace. Listening to the waters ahead. Your hands rest on his arms, caressing it gently with your thumb before turning to look at him. "Hm?"

"Nothing." You smirk.

"That's not nothing."

"I just wanna show you how much I appreciate you and all of this."

"Oh, yeah?" He chuckles as he watches you stir in your position to fully face him. You're on your knees, keeping yourself steady as you lean in to kiss him. He deepens the kiss, his hand tugging your jacket to keep you close. You straddle him in his position, gripping his chin with your hand. "Fuck, I missed you." He says breathily before your tongue licks his entire bottom lip, causing him to tilt his head back and hiss.

"Wanna close this up?" You nod towards the trunk, causing you to giggle when he quickly shuts the door with his car remote and wraps his arms around you to lay you down gently. He takes off your jacket, tossing it aside in the front seat before softly kissing your neck and nipping on the surface of your skin. You feel his tongue swipe up your neck before he plants a kiss on your jaw, then back up to your lips. He aggressively lifts up your bra, exposing your breasts for him to play and suck on. He grips them as he sinks his mouth lower onto your nipple, sucking and letting his tongue explore on your bud. "Ohhhhhh." You mewl as he lets go with a pop, moving onto your other nipple, his hands now starting to pull your leggings down.

He begins to make his way down, leaving kisses on your stomach, abdomen, inner thighs, then your clothed clit. You slightly hiss at the feeling, causing you to wiggle a bit underneath him, signaling that you want more. He doesn't argue, or tease, and instead immediately pulls your soaked panties off, allowing his tongue to freely explore down your folds and push in and out of your entrance. "Jin." You moan as he's now sucking gently on your clit, two digits pumping in and out of you. "Fuuuuck, Jin. Stopppp." You whine. "I'm gonna cum."

"Why would I stop?" He says in between sucking your clit. The more he's pumping his fingers in and out of you, the more you feel yourself unraveling. It's not long before you're trembling under his arm, almost squeezing Jin's head in between your thighs as he continues to suck on your clit slowly while you ride out your high. Once you've been able to regulate your breathing, you watch as he undoes his belt and slightly pulls his pants down just enough to let his hardened member spring free. He spits onto his hand and pumps himself a few times while you've taken the initiative to suck on the two fingers he used to help make you cum the first time. He groans at the sight, wasting no time to line his tip with your entrance.

His body is lowered onto yours, your heels planted steadily as your hands explore up his back and inside of his shirt. He leans down to kiss you as he's inserting himself slowly, your moans being captured by the kiss. When he bottoms out, he begins to roll his hips into you, your kisses becoming messy and wet. Your hands are getting tangled in his hair, gently gripping the strands as he works his way with you, careful not to shake the car too much.

Either way, he feels fucking good. You feel fucking food. He fills you up so well and you're sure he'd make you cum any second with the way he's rolling into you. The moment is sensual, and full of passion. He's holding you closely as you with him, the crashes of the waves still echoing in the car even though the trunk is fully closed.

"Jin, please." You whimper, causing him to let out a small moan.

"God, I'm not gonna last if you keep doing that." He says, your hips now working against his.

"Fuuuuuuck!" You cry, your nails digging into his back, causing him to slightly groan and pick up his pace just a bit - he still manages to fuck you slowly and deeply, his tip hitting your core every second. "I'm gonna cum. Cum with me."

"Cum, baby." He nods, his hips slightly moving at a faster pace. Just as the waves crash against the wall, you feel yourself hurdling over the edge for the second time. It hits you so hard that you aren't able to make any noise, except let your body tremble and your face make the expression for you as your eyes roll back and your hands grip onto his hair and shoulder. The look sends him over, especially with your walls constricting tightly around him. He groans into your neck, thrusting hard but slowly just to let you both ride out the last of the high. He stays there for a minute before he's slowly raising his head and brushing the hair out of your face. The windows are all fogged up and it suddenly feels like that one scene from Titanic. "I love you, Y/N."

"I love you, too."

And in this moment, this is when you felt completely still. At peace. Like you could finally breathe. You rested your head against Jin's chest, listening to his heartbeat in one ear and the waves through the other, closing your eyes to take in this entire moment.

Let yourself live, and be happy.

[wlw-lovestruck-fiction]

So I have a request 👉👈 How would Darla and Mc's first kiss would be (Take your time doing this, I can wait patiently😊)

Written by @an-awkward-ghost

The last thing you had ever imagined was to do magical training with Darla, of all people

She had been growing on you lately. Both of you had tried to be less snappy, and Darla was actually fun to be around when she wasn’t firing off insults as if she were a machine gun. She was fiercely protective and surprisingly patient once you got on her good side. She had taken the whole fairytale world in stride, slightly shocked and skeptical at first but rolling with it afterwards.

You hadn’t planned for her to discover it, honestly. She had been at the wrong place at the wrong time, and it had only been thanks to Lucas’ quick thinking that everyone had made it out alive. Who knew the Pied Piper of Hamelin would be such a bad guy? You had been hoping he would be different from the story, like Ezra, but he turned out to be even worse.

And now, here you are, practicing for the plan Nora and Arin had hashed out an hour ago, trying and failing to learn to play something to counter the Pied Piper’s own brainwashing melody.

For that matter — who knew Darla was so good with the flute? As the only one who knew how to play it, but also the only one without magic, she had taken it upon herself to teach the rest. Everyone had already left for the day, so it was only you and her now.

You, too stubborn to leave without at least accomplishing one note right, and her, too passionate about her task to deny you an extra lesson.

It could be going better, though…

“Do you even have air in your lungs, Beth? I swear I can’t hear a thing—”

“I am blowing!”

“Remember that it’s like you’re smiling. A little smile. You’re good with that, right? We don’t want an ‘o’ shape unless we need a low pitch.”

Darla’s eyes are fixed on your lips, analyzing the shape. It’s distracting. You know she only does it in the professional sense, but at some point over the lessons, you’d found that your breath stuttered every time she did it, smile widening more than intended for blowing out the flute, cheeks darkening.

“Let’s take a short break,” the brown-haired girl finally announces, turning away, and the tension in your chest you hadn’t acknowledged until now instantly disappears.

I’m a mess, you think, frustration creeping into the lukewarm feeling you get every time Darla looks at you.

“Sorry.”

“No problem, Beth, I know how learning an instrument can be.”

“But isn’t flute supposed to be easy?”

She shrugs. It’s a calm little thing, just a slight, elegant movement of her shoulders. Once again, you’re in awe of how patient she is. You would have stormed off a while ago.

“Any skill has its ups and downs, even the ones that are supposed to be easy. And hey, even that varies from person to person. Don’t feel down about it. I’m sure you’ll have it down by the end of the week.”

“Great advice as always, Darla.”

She smirks that smirk you used to hate, coated with confidence and typical Popular Girl Satisfaction™. “You know it.” And then her expression softens as she turns to look at her flute, twirling it slightly with a reverence that has you mesmerized. “I can’t wait to see you all work magic with these, or the look the Pied Piper’s gonna get.”

“It’s difficult. I don’t know how to explain it... Um. Well, it’s like the music keeps bouncing off any spell I try to combine it with. Like they aren’t compatible or something.”

“Nora explained that to me. That’s why she’s going to enchant the flutes instead, right? Once she gets the necessary materials?”

“Yeah… it’ll make things easier, too. We usually use incantations — they are way easier than just trying to image the spell. Hey, maybe that’s why it keeps bouncing off? But then again, I can’t exactly say the spell when I’m blowing…”

Darla frowns, looking up from the flute. “Who knows? All of this is too complicated for me. I’d rather stick to what I know… speaking of which, let’s try one more time. You’re going to hit the note, I’m sure of it.”

“Uh…”

The instrument feels heavy on your hands. You rise it towards your lips, clumsily placing your fingers the way Darla had instructed you before, but pause just before blowing, noticing the way Darla’s eyes focus on your lips as if magnetized.

“I…”

“C’mon, Beth.”

Shouldn’t her focus be on your hands…? She must know how much she’s distracting you, doesn’t she?

“It’s just… well…”

Her eyes flick upwards to your eyes, curious. “Yes?”

She has to know. There’s no way she can be this oblivious, right?

Your mouth opens and then closes, at a loss for words. The seconds tick by in the background like a restless pulse, and you lose whatever bravado you had managed to gather.

“Maybe I should just call it a day.”

Darla looks a bit surprised at that. There’s a pause as she looks at you, her expression impassive for all of two seconds before a soft, amused smile breaks through, eyes as alluring as a dark bottle of wine. The change is so instant it leaves you stunned; she’d been slightly distant throughout the lessons, more concentrated on the technique than friendly banter, but now she had seemingly abandoned that.

“Is something distracting you, Elizabeth?” She asks, voice soft and composed, and a shiver runs down your spine at the sound. The fact that she doesn’t use your nickname and how it makes her every word so much more intense means she’s probably aware of the effect she has on you…

And the realization sets the butterflies in your stomach alight.

“Well?”

There’s no sense in beating around the bush. Darla may be patient once one manages to get into her good side, but you know her well enough to know she appreciates direct answers more than anything else.

“You.”

She hums, leaning slightly forward, hand coming up to grasp your chin. Her hold is delicate, but firm.

“We can’t have that. You need to concentrate if we want to have any chance against the Pied Piper.” She slides the flute out of your grasp, leaving it on a table nearby without sparing it so much as a glance. Her eyes are locked on yours.

“T-this may be counterproductive…”

She stops.

“Don’t you want this?”

“I do!” You blurt out, fast. Too fast. Darla chuckles lowly, not pulling away but not advancing either. “What about you?”

The blush that spreads over her cheeks is answer enough.

“You really were using the lessons as an excuse to stare at my lips, huh?”

“N-no!” She grows still, all the suave energy she was exuding before fading like a dream. “Well, just a little bit, but mouth shape is important to play the flute—”

“A-ha! So you were!”

“Wha—hey! Didn’t you just hear what I just—?”

“That’s not important right now.”

She actually frowns, not truly offended but still irked you dismiss her just like that, but you don’t give her a chance to actually voice her thoughts. You tilt your head upwards, feeling the way her breath stutters, and lean forward.

Slow, so she’ll back away if she wants, but she doesn’t even hesitate.

Kissing Darla is like kissing an inferno—she’s intense, pushing you back until you hit the wall, her hand on your hair cushioning the impact. She kisses you as if you were to disappear from her hands in a puff of smoke, as if you were a receding tide and the setting sun, and she only had this second to capture the shape of your lips, to capture your existence in her mind. It’s almost dizzying, but you surrender to it completely anyway, your arms snaking around her waist and pulling her closer.

The only reason you even pull away is because your lungs demand air. Darla blinks, probably expecting a longer kiss.

“Too much?”

“I just… give me a second…”

She smiles against your lips when you pull her down a second time after you catch your breath, and this time it’s sweeter, gentler, more like a soft petal.

When you finally part, she sighs and melts against you.

“Will you try to focus more, now?” She whispers.

You give her an incredulous look. “After that? No way.”

“C’mon, Beth. You need to save the world.” She laughs, and you roll your eyes.

“Maybe I will stop getting so distracted if I had more time to get used to this. More demonstrations would help, certainly.”

“Certainly.”

You are, officially, on cloud nine.

[idreamofplaid]

A Merry Little Christmas

Summary: Christmas can be, above all, a season of hope. Dean reminds the reader of that.

Characters: Dean x Reader; Marla & Ted (OCs)

Word Count: 2821

Warnings: Oral (female receiving)

A/N: This is for @firefly-in-darkness written as part of @negans-lucille-tblr ‘s fic exchange. I hope you like it. It’s inspired by the song “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”.

The bar was empty with the exception of some of the hardcore regulars. It was the week before Christmas, and that changed the clientele somewhat, but not entirely. Some of the fortunate had places to be, loved ones to draw near, and celebrations to bring to life the joyful intent of the season. For others, it was the same routine, December 25th was just another day on the calendar. 

Marla Henderson had her usual seat at the end of the bar wearing something tight fitting and low cut to see whose eye she might catch. She’d been doing it ever since her husband left in a desperate grab at feeling wanted, desired, and validated again. Watching her always made Y/N feel a hollow, nagging sadness in the pit of her stomach. She could be Marla in a few years, only without the husband. 

That thought filled her with melancholy, and the music from the jukebox wasn’t helping. The Carpenters could always make her feel wistful even when the song was about roasting chestnuts and meant to be festive. The garland that was hanging in swags around the room was also having the opposite of the desired effect on her. It looked out of place, like a poor attempt at a pretense of merriment.

Ted Markham was also here tonight, slinging back the whiskeys. The holidays hadn’t changed anything for him, or about him. He was always on the prowl, looking to get lucky, and far too often he was looking to get lucky with her; tonight was no different. “Hey, darlin’, how about another one?”

She poured another shot in his glass and asked a little more cynically than she should  with a customer, “Don’t you ever have a limit, Ted?”

He put his hand over hers suggestively. “Not too often, gorgeous.”

She pulled her hand away and put the bottle back on the shelf. He just wasn’t getting the hint tonight. “Y/N, why don’t you come over here and sit on this stool next to me? It’s a slow night. Nobody’s gonna mind.”

He was right about one thing. It was a slow night. Couples seemed to have already paired up for the holidays to bask in the warmth of true love or enjoy a fleeting whatever to help get them through the season. After a string of disappointing boyfriends and too many dashed dreams of holiday romance, Y/N had basically given up. “Sounds tempting, Ted, but I’m gonna pass.”

He wasn’t usually a belligerent drunk, but maybe something in the tone of her voice had set him off. “Now is that any way to talk to your best customer?”

Y/N had been in her share of tight spots thanks to her chosen line of work over the years, but this time she found herself getting really uncomfortable and just wishing she could sink beneath the bar and hide.

She was struggling for a comeback and starting to get flustered when a tall, powerfully built stranger with broad shoulders and the face of a Calvin Klein model confidently strode up to the bar. He made a point of standing in Ted’s space and flashed Y/N an easy smile. She got lost in his deep green eyes for a minute and almost missed what he said. “Sorry I’m late, sweetheart.”

He gave a cursory glance over his shoulder at Ted. That was all he needed to do. This man had an air about him that anyone with an ounce of sense or self preservation would know not to challenge. Ted made a lame excuse about it being late and hastily left.

The unknown, handsome guy took a seat on the barstool Ted had vacated. Marla was already giving him her best sultry look. Y/N recovered from her earlier discomfort. There was something about being in this guy’s presence that made her feel safe. She couldn’t think of anything clever to say so she went with, “Thanks for rescuing me. Can I offer you a drink on the house?”

He smiled again, and she felt her Grinch like shrunken heart start to glow a little bit. “Sure. I’m Dean.” He extended his hand.  When she accepted his hand to shake it, it was warm, solid, and strong. Y/N could get used to the feeling of that hand.

Dean stayed until closing time, and after a couple shots of whiskey he had switched to beer. It was a small gesture but one that didn’t go unnoticed by Y/N. He wasn’t interested in getting drunk.

Y/N wasn’t sure why he was alone in a bar tonight. Maybe he didn’t have anywhere to go? Maybe he was alone too? That was hard to believe; look at him. And for the first time since she’d noticed Dean, she did. She really looked at him.

There was a depth in his eyes that it was easy to miss at first, probably because he kept it hidden; he didn’t want anyone to see it. It was a type of softness wrapped up and hidden by the hard glint he’d most likely put in his eyes because sometimes he needed that to survive.

Y/N was fascinated by Dean and spent the rest of her shift getting to know him. Marla gave up after about forty-five minutes and left when Dean hadn’t so much as tossed a look in her direction. Y/N’s questions weren’t too probing, just the getting to know you kind of stuff. “I’ve never seen you around before. What brings you to town?”

Dean took a slow drag from his beer, and the way his full lips circled around the opening of that bottle was more than a little distracting. He gave a mirthless chuckle and sighed. “Business is kind of slow for once. Don’t have much family, just my brother. He’s got a new girlfriend. They’ve been dancing around each other for a couple of years now. Finally took the plunge, and I’d just be the third wheel. So, I hit the open road to see where it’d take me.” He took another drink of his beer and appraised her with his eyes. They stopped their downward movement at her neck, which she also appreciated. “What about you? How’d you end up in this bar?”

This was a story Y/N didn’t tell often. She preferred to keep it pushed back as far as she could get it, covered in dust, on a high shelf where no one ever looked. She wanted to tell him, and poured herself a drink to reinforce her courage. “I needed a new start. Life didn’t turn out at all like I had expected or hoped, and I thought a change in geography might magically fix it.” She put her whiskey glass down on the bar after only taking one sip. “I was wrong.” 

Dean didn’t say anything, instead waiting for her to go on when she was ready. “I didn’t have the happiest childhood. For awhile I thought I’d escaped all that. Met a guy. We even had a little house together, but then he cheated on me. End of fairytale.”

Dean leaned forward, resting his forearms on the bar. His voice was quiet, reflective. He looked into her eyes, and she knew he actually saw her. “Bastard. You deserved better.”

Y/N laughed, the way she sometimes did when she didn’t know how to process her feelings. “How do you know? You just met me.”

Dean paused, and there was a heaviness in his words when he answered, “I know how to read people.”

Y/N laughed again. “Do you think you could teach me how to do that? I always pick the wrong guy. Did it three more times after him.” She downed the remaining whiskey in her glass.

Wanting to change the subject, Y/N looked around the bar to see if someone needed a refill. She’d been so engrossed in her conversation with Dean that she hadn’t noticed the place had completely emptied out, and it was only 1 am. Christmas. People and their places to go, or worse their utter despair at having nowhere to go. Dean looked around and assessed the situation too. He turned back to her, “Hey, why don’t you close up? I’ll wait and take you home.”

She welcomed his offer; she didn’t want to be alone in this place tonight. The sadness, desperation, and discontent just seemed to hang in the air. Y/N made quick work of wiping down all the tables and securing the stockroom, including the safe. Dean was waiting for her when she reemerged.

He pulled his keys from his pocket; the jingle was loud, but not unpleasant in the empty bar. “My car’s outside.” Y/N nodded. She’d call someone to get a ride to work tomorrow; her car would be okay here. Right now, she just wanted someone to take care of her, even if all that meant was a ride home.

His car matched the man. Rare. Powerful. Something you didn’t see everyday, and completely beautiful. Dean opened the very large and shiny black passenger door for her. He had an unexpected side too. Guys this tough usually didn’t act so gentlemanly.

Her tiny bungalow wasn’t far, and the ride ended too soon for Y/N. Sticking to his chivalrous ways, Dean walked her to the front door. It almost felt like the end of a date, and she found herself wanting to kiss him. Snow started to fall, and she pulled her coat around her more tightly 

Y/N tilted her head up and one of the big fluffy flakes landed on her cheek. For a minute, she remembered how giddy the sight of snow had made her when she was a girl. It was still a symbol of beauty and hope for her. She saw the flakes start to collect in Dean’s hair. Without thinking, she reached up and brushed her fingers over his hair, but resisted the urge to run her fingers through it.  His eyes caught hers for a minute as the snow fell between them before he leaned down and kissed her with a touch as light as the snow that fell on her face.

She opened her eyes slowly. It was quiet with the kind of peace that only a snowfall can bring. The heat was radiating off his body. It warmed her, and she didn’t want to let that warmth,or him, go. “Do you want to come inside?” 

They both knew what that meant. Something had passed between them during that kiss. Dean licked his lips and seemed to be thinking. His eyes lingered on hers for a minute before he answered, “Yeah, I’d like that.”

As soon as they were inside, Y/N took off her coat and hung it up. Then she turned to Dean and started to push his jacket from his shoulders. “Let’s get you out of this.” She hung it on a peg next to her coat. When she turned back to him, he pulled her into a close embrace and kissed her with purpose. It was slow, deep, and doing everything he meant it to do. HIs tongue circled hers, and her arousal grew. If his kiss alone could do this to her, she was in for a memorable night. 

Dean’s hands made their way down her back until one stopped on her waist while the other snaked lower down to cup her ass and give it a light squeeze. She was starting to breathe heavier into his mouth. She pulled away from the kiss and took his hand. “Bedroom’s this way.”

The rooms in her house were tiny, too tiny to accommodate big beds. Right now the coziness of her full size bed seemed perfect. Dean immediately began to strip off his layers of shirts. She watched his naked shoulders and back while he bent over to take off his boots. His body was toned and had just the right amount of muscle. Y/N imagined her fingernails digging into his back. 

She was dragged from her fantasy back to the glory of reality when Dean started to unbutton the black shirt she wore for bartending duties. Underneath that functional shirt she was wearing the kind of bra that makes a girl feel pretty, and the way Dean was looking at it made her feel more than that. His look told her just how much he desired her. 

He took off his jeans before he laid her down on the bed and turned his attention to her lace covered breasts. He laved at her nipples, sucking and kissing them through the fabric. He took one of her taut nubs between his teeth and pulled at it. She moaned beneath him. “Dean, please.” 

He slid further down her body, dragging his hands down her sides, kissing all the way down to her pants that were in the way of what she wanted. Dean removed that barrier, taking her panties off at the same time. He parted her thighs and settled between her legs. He made a long swipe with his tongue through her folds, stopping at her clit to lap at before settling his lips around it to suck.

The way he’d kissed her didn’t lie; he knew what to do with his mouth. She was whimpering and pleading with him for more. He pushed at her entrance with one finger, gently exploring. Then he added another and started scissoring them to open her up. She came on his mouth while he stroked her g spot with his fingers.

Her fingers were buried in his hair, and her fists were closed around handfuls of it. Dean whispered against her core, “You’re beautiful, sweetheart.” He kissed her inner thighs while she came down from her orgasm. 

When her breath evened out, she sat up; Dean rose up on his knees to face her. She reached behind her to unhook her bra and let it fall. Then she reached for the waistband of Dean’s boxer briefs to push them down and release his erect cock to stand thick against his stomach. He finished taking them off while she fumbled to open her bedside drawer and get a condom. She handed it to him, he sheathed himself, then laid her back down on the bed, kissing her as they went. 

He buried his face into her neck and kissed that sensitive spot beneath her ear. She put her arms around him and whispered, “Now, Dean. I’m ready for you.”

He entered her with a smooth, swift motion. She inhaled sharply, and he pushed deeply inside her. She moved her body with his, feeling every drag of his cock over her sweet spot and push of it against her cervix. Just like she’d imagined, she dug her fingers into his back when she came and felt him throb inside her, coming just seconds after she did.

Dean said her name as he let go, and she clenched around him; her orgasm revived by his, by the pleasure she could hear she was giving him. They lay motionless for a sweet moment before Dean moved to take care of the condom. When he returned, easing the covers back and slipping into bed she asked him, “What are you doing?”

He motioned for her to get under the warm blankets with him. She settled in beside him, and he wrapped his arms around her. “I’m holding you.”

The snow was still falling outside, and she watched it fall through the window, not sure what to say. It was Dean who spoke again. “Is that okay? Do you want me to go?”

She let herself relax and lay her hand on his chest. “No, I don’t want you to go. I guess I just thought you would. That’s the way this usually goes.”

Dean kissed the top of her head. “Well, that’s not how it should go. You should be held, kissed some more, and told just how beautiful you are. A man would be crazy not to know how lucky he is to have a woman like you in his arms.”

Y/N got very quiet. She felt tears in her eyes, and for once they weren’t tears of sadness. She closed her eyes and just let herself feel what it was like to be so close to him and to hear a man say these kinds of things to her. She trusted him. She trusted what he was saying, and she trusted that this could be something that lasted beyond tonight. Was this even possible? Could it be possible that there was such a thing as a Christmas miracle? She had believed in them back when snow meant hope to her. Dean tightened his hold around her, making her feel secure, and she felt him kiss her forehead. Yes, they could be real.

Everything: @gambitwinchester​ @princessmisery666​ @onethirstyunicorn​ @peridottea91​ @logical-princey​ @emilyshurley​ @beenlovingromansincedayoneish​ @fangirlxwritesx67​ @waywardbaby​ @atc74​ @ledzeppelinsbonzo​ @shaniquacynthia​ @mariekoukie6661​ @tumbler-tidbits​ @67-chevy-baby​ @fandom-princess-forevermore​ @terrarium-jpeg​ @emoryhemsworth​ @crashdevlin​ @heycasbutt​ @jules-1999​ @mrsdeannafuckingwinchester​ @cosicas-cuquis​ @sammyimpala-67​ @queenoftheunderdark​ @dean-winchesters-bacon​ @mrs-meghan-winchester​ @timelordy-fangirl2​ @sweetness47​ @hobby27​ @awesomesusiebstuff​ @kickingitwithkirk​ @becs-bunker​ @sandlee44​ @supernaturalgrandma​ @lonewolf471​ @sea040561​ @dawnie1988​ @maddiepants​ @volleyballer519​ @outcastedangel​ @kdfrqqg​ @lizette50​ @daisymoder72​ @sorenmarie87​ @oldfreakything​ @winchesterxfamilybusiness​ @deansotherotherblog​

Dean/Jensen: @deansyahtzee​ @flamencodiva​ @deanwinchesterswitch​ @feelmyroarrrr​ @sammit-janet​ @focusonspn​ @akshi8278​ @ladywinchester1967​ @sgarrett49​ @wingedcatninja​ @coffee-obsessed-writer​ @adoptdontshoppets​ @ellewritesfix05​ 

[angelicmark]

pairing: rich boy!jeno x reader

genre: angst, smut, fluff

warnings: unprotected sex, sad, blood mentioned

wc: 4.8k

summary: rich boy jeno. and he loves you, even if you’re not considered top class the way he is. but life’s not always a fairytale.

➣ apart of the narcissistic lovers series

↳ masterlist

cold.

it was cold.

the metal rings around his delicate fingers gracing your features as he kissed you with fervour that almost made your lips start to bleed. your lips were definitely swollen. but did you care? no. not really. you tug on his expensive suit, feeling the high end material beneath your fingertips. you wanted to curse him for always wearing such expensive clothes that cost more than half your rent. the watch and rings that adorned his hands and wrist practically glowing under the soft light of the empty classroom. were you really about to fuck jeno in your college?

why not?

when he pulled back from the kiss, his eyes were dark and glaring down at you. you bit your bottom lip and he raised an eyebrow at the action. you were so tempting. always so damn tempting. he couldn’t help himself. he was normally a good boy; always had good grades, never fought anyone, never did any drugs or hung around the wrong crowd. you were good too. you did all of the same things, but you weren’t rich like he was. to say people were surprised when the two of you crossed paths, well that’s an understatement. it was such a cliché. loving the rich boy when you were considered middle class. but you couldn’t find it in yourself as you felt his drastically cold hands trail along the insides of your warm thighs.

he tilts his head a bit, “do you want me, pretty angel?”

“jeno,” you roll your eyes, your own fingers tugging at the nape of his neck, “we don’t have a lot of time before i have to get to my next course.”

he huffs, “shame, i love taking my time with you.” he tugs your panties to the side, raising his eyebrow again when he notices just how wet you were for him. “how long have you been like this, baby?”

“please?” you try to hurry him up, pulling him close as one of your hands make quick work of his pants. he chuckles at how eager you are, looking down at your struggling hands before finally helping you. when his dick springs free, making a soft slap echo in the room, you were quick to grab it and pump him. he let’s out a gasp at the feeling, and he feels so hot and heavy in your hand. you watch as he bites his lower lip in pleasure, your thumb swiping away the precum that starts to bead at the tip. he growls, swatting your hand away as quick as he could.

“fuck off,” he groans in your ear, pushing your panties to the side as far as they’ll go and easily starts to slide in, “hold on, baby. i’m gonna fuck you as quick as i can. we have ten minutes, angel.”

and he does. his cock fills you so well, your back arching into him as your chest presses against his. he has you on the desk, taking you as far as you’ll allow him. and he knows all of your weak spots, knows that his grunts send you right over the edge. knows you like when he starts to bite at the spot joining your neck and shoulder. knows he likes the soft teasing of his thumb on your clit as his palm rests on your pelvis. and it feels so good. he’s so deep inside of you, pushing at your cervix with each thrust and making your mind start to go blank and your vision go fuzzy. he was so good, always knew what to do to please you.

“fuck, jeno,” the way you chant his name has him growling in your ear out of possessiveness. and it causes your walls to flutter around him in excitement, “you’re so fucking big.” your whines were getting louder and louder, throwing out the fact that you were still in public.

“yeah? feel good, sweetheart?” he chuckles as he starts to thrust deeper, faster, harder. you can hear the small groan of the desk, but neither of you really care when you’re running on the edge of both of your releases. you were so hot and tight around him, your fluttering walls making him lose his brain. you always felt so good. it was always good with you. “you’re so wet, i can fucking hear you, baby. i can hear just how desperate your pussy is to get fucked by me.”

you mewl in his grip, one of his hands steadying himself on the desk while the other is eagerly rubbing at your clit. you were so close. “jeno, shit. i’m close, i’m... i’m gonna cum, please.”

he chuckles darkly, looking at you with sweat forming on his forehead and his fringe sticking to it. he looked so delicious in your eyes. “so soon? you really are my good girl, aren’t you?” he huffs, pulling his hand that was steadying himself around your waist and tugging you as close to him as he could, “fuck, cum for me. let me feel you cum all over me.”

your mouth falls open in a silent scream as you feel the coil in your stomach snap, a cry of his name rolling off your lips like it was the most natural thing on earth. and, in a way, it was. you come undone around him, your walls pulsing and his dick throbbing inside of you as he growls and groans in your ear, following right after you. he couldn’t help himself from cumming inside of you, the feeling of your warm, tight walls gripping him. you were milking him for all he was worth, and it was sending him right over the edge. it felt like heaven being stuffed full by him, so you weren’t really complaining. your fingers were tugging desperately on his hair through it all, and you swore his scalp had to be sore at this point.

“shit,” he cursed, shuddering as the two of you come down soon enough. he removes his hand from your clit and you whine at the abuse your small nub took. he shushes you, petting your head and holding you close to him. he was cradling you, kissing your temple with ease and cooing at you. “you’re so good, y/n. always so good to me. thank you.”

you sigh, “thank you,” you return the gesture. and he smiles at you before giving you a soft kiss on your slightly swollen lips. he chuckles at your natural pout.

“you’re so cute,” he pulls out of you, doing his best in not letting any of his release seap out of you. he quickly pulls your panties back in place, smirking proudly. “walk around with my cum inside of you. you’re mine.”

you lick your lips, brushing your fingers through your hair and easing your wobbly legs off the desk. you were his. yes, you were. you are. and the thought alone made your stomach start to turn as you look at him, his pants pulled back to normal position but his hair still ruffled from your previous torture. you laugh at him a bit, and he looks confused. the pout on his face when you start to fix his hair made your heart flutter. you couldn’t help yourself. just as much as he couldn’t help himself either.

“thanks,” he kisses your cheek, “you should get going, your course starts in two minutes.”

you nod your head with a smile, returning the cheek kiss with gratitude, “i’ll see you after.”

he nods his head back, “of course, angel.”

and his voice was so gravely. so warm in your ears. you could feel your body start to tingle, your mind grow hazy. jeno was turning into the love of your life in just over a few months of being together. jeno was good. he was so, so good. too good for you. didn’t he want someone who wasn’t so... normal? someone who didn’t exactly have all of the high class privileges the way he did. he deserves someone smarter, richer, kinder. but he stuck with you through it all. stayed by your side, despite how insecure and bratty you tend to get. jeno never left you. and you really wished you knew why. you didn’t want him to leave you. but you wanted him happy. was he happy with you? was this all a dream? did he mean it when he said he cared for you? you hoped he meant it. because you knew you meant it.

you really, really meant it.

the pads of his delicate fingers were rushingly, yet softly, hitting the keys of the shiny, dark piano in front of you. the bench was slightly longer than a normal piano bench, and you rested your head on his shoulder. the piece he played was beautiful. it was a classic, being sonata no. 14 moonlight in c-sharp minor. it was beautiful, slow and not too fast. it almost made your heart ache as he pressed the keys so heavily. he was a dream. the look on his face was concentrated, breathing in a tuff of air when the music got slightly faster but ended up slowing back down again. and when you closed your eyes, all you can imagine is him. it’s always him.

your heart was beating so fast, you were afraid it would end up drowning out the pretty sound in your ears. so you open your eyes again, looking at his fingers work with ease and realize just how... easy it was for him. he was talented, there was no skipping around the fact. and you were dripping in admiration for him and he could feel your love in the air, making his fingers work like he was made to play. and he is made to play, you always knew that. the sounds he preduced out of such a wonderful instrument always left you breathless by the time he was done. he made your heart and chest yearn for him, making you start to fall in love.

when he slowed down the pace again, suddenly stopping, you looked at him with pretty doe eyes of confusion. and he feels his heart beat quicken, begging to be release of the confines of his chest. you were his solace, the one thing that no longer brought him a dear amount of pain. you were straight out of a dream, he thought. and you weren’t even aware of it. aware of the effect you held over his head.

“sorry,” he hums, hands dropping to his sides as he looks at the black and white keys in front of him, “..i think i’m nervous.” he feels his stomach twist. he was definitely nervous.

“why?” you lean against his shoulder again, your nose catching the scent of his cologne. “you play for me all the time, jeno.”

and he nods his head, “i know, but it never gets any less scary. i always want to impress you, make you see you’re worth my time or make you see i’m worth your time, too.”

you smile softly at his words, looking where his knee slightly bounces at your small chuckle, “you’re always worth it, jeno.” the kiss you place on his cheek makes his brain re-circuit and he has to wipe the edge of his palms on his jeans out of nervousness. you’ve been his girlfriend for months now, and you were still making him feel helpless at times like these, sending his mind into a different dimension. maybe that’s why he started to fall so hard. you were never boring, and he never got enough of you it seemed.

you breathe in his scent, and it was so soft. he smelled like fresh laundry, his cologne only making a blend into it. his hair was still lightly damp from his shower he took an hour prior. your head was starting to feel dizzy as he leaned in to press a soft kiss against your lips. and it’s nothing but that. soft, emotional. jeno tended to get emotional after playing for you, and he never finished the full song every time. you weren’t complaining, though. even if he played only one note, you would be happy. as long as he was chasing after the one thing he was passionate about, you weren’t arguing. he grew up playing, it was such a passion of his. he competed even sometimes when he had time for it. his awards stood proudly along his glass shelves, and you can’t help yourself from smiling each time you see them. you were incredibly proud of him.

his hand reaches up to cup your jaw as you pull away, and his eyes glimmer under the soft lights. the chandelier hung on the high ceiling above you, at the lowest setting as the rest of the lighting came from the moonlight outside. he had a separate room just for his piano and music sheets, the windows big and overlooking the city below. it felt like a dream every time you had the pleasure of being there. you could never get used to jeno’s household. he was wealthy, always wearing clothes that could probably buy your life out. but he was still jeno, despite it all. he was still the same boy you met years ago before starting to fall in love just weeks ago. he was unlike anything you’ve ever seen before.

you pull back, getting up from the seat beside him. you could practically feel the pout on his lips as you look at the bright city lights below you. he lived in a penthouse, the place being larger than you thought. your eyes scan all across, examining it like it was your last chance. when you feel arms wrap around your torso, bringing your back to his chest, you hum and lean your head on his shoulder. he looks down at you with curious eyes, as if asking why you got up.

“i feel like i’m living in some kind of fairytale,” you explain. you press into him more and he relaxes against you, but tightens his hold. “it’s not every day i get to be here, but every time it always seems to take my breath away. you make me lose my mind, jeno.” you lift your head again, looking at the cars pass below you, “i never feel like i belong here.”

jeno drops his head onto your shoulder, breathing in your own familiar scent, “you belong here with me.” and he wasn’t lying. you did belong with him. what were you so uncertain about?

your gaze lands onto his hands that were playing with the hem of your plain t-shirt, and you sigh. his fingers were decorated in his favorite rings as usual and his wrist was being hugged by a very expensive watch, as usual. hell, the air even felt richer. you would never get used to it. you were unsure you even belonged in his arms sometimes. you were insecure, sure. you knew that much. did he ever wish he was with someone more than you? someone that had more than you?

you turn around to face him, thumb stroking along his cheek, and he leans into your touch like some kind of lovesick cat. and you keen into him, your heart clenching in its confines of your chest. and you let it. you let your mouth find his in a passionate entangle that night, hoping for better days. you let him press himself closer to you, his hands trailing all along your figure because he knew you were his. and you are his. for as long as the world keeps spinning, you’re his.

but when were your insecurities going to catch up on you?

the morning was hazy, the sunlight shining brightly onto his glowing skin. he had a small pout placed on his face as he snuggled into you, his broad body engulfing yours. your hands lightly trace shapes onto his bare back, feeling him ease further into your touch. he was sleeping heavily, his breath tickling your neck and causing a shiver to run down your spine. you wore his shirt, the familiar smell of him entrancing your senses. it was mornings like these that made your heart expand even more for him. there was no interruption, silence falling into the quiet air. his head buried in your neck, lips unconciously brushing against the sensitive spot behind your ear. and the sun was casting along the both of you, like you were in some kind of fantasy. it was moments like these that made it all worth it.

one of your hands can’t help traveling up to his hair, the nape of his neck becoming inviting. and the flutter of his lashes are felt against your neck, making you look at him with soft eyes. his eyes were squinted, and the moment wasn’t like the novels would say they would be. it was more than that. jeno doesn’t kiss your lips, instead opting to kiss your cheek and hum against you. and it was quiet. the morning was quiet, the soft humming of the occasional birds that flew by the only sound heard from time to time. and it was so perfect for you. there wasn’t a single word exchanged, it was just the two of you. there was no second guessing and there was no overthinking during times like these. you could relax, put your thoughts away for another time and focus on the man laying on top of you.

the snuggle you feel against your neck when he breathes you in makes you shiver. and he smiles as he feels goosebumps travel along the soft expanse of your body. you were so soft under his touch, his fingertips starting to burn into your skin as he etches his way into your heart like he was made to. and you let him. just this once, you let him. you don’t dare disturb the universe right now. not when jeno starts peppering kisses along your jaw and smiles at you with lazy eyes when you look down at him. and especially not when he brushes his nose against yours like a lovesick cat.

“good morning,” his voice husks out, the sound almost foreign in your ears. but you like it.

“morning,” you smile and he grins right back, his eyes scrunching up like usual. he places a soft kiss to your nose before getting up and making way to the bathroom. you idly follow him, stretching your tired limbs as you make way for the day to start. the sun felt nice on you in comparison to the cold room. when you reach the bathroom, you catch him brushing his teeth like every other morning. and you notice how he looks at you through the mirror with a raised eyebrow. you just smile, wrapping your arms around his torso and leaning your head on his back. and he welcomes the feeling, not exactly used to you being this clingy but definitely not resisting it. he loved when you were overly touchy.

he spits, briefly washing his mouth out with mint mouthwash and sticking his tongue out because it’s too ‘spicy’, as he says. when he raises back up, he looks over his shoulder to catch sight of you and turns around. your grip on him doesn’t falter, and he hums, wrapping his own arms around you like they belonged there and nowhere else. his scent was so intoxicating, your head was spinning. even in the mornings, he still smelt like himself. he still had that fresh laundry smell and even though his cologne was basically brushed off at that point, you could still feel a whiff of it travel through your nose and consume your brain. your hands lightly scrape along his back, lifting up his shirt and closing your eyes as you lean into his chest. he rests his head on yours, sighing to himself. you fit perfectly in his arms.

“are you alright?” he asks, and his voice was starting to go back to his regular tone, but you could still hear the sleep he carried over his shoulders.

“yeah,” you mumble, breathing him in again, “just miss you.”

he laughs very softly, “we see each other almost every day, y/n.”

“i know,” you smile before finally looking into his eyes again. they were sparkling. “but i always miss you.”

he scrunches his nose, a look of distaste, “you’re so cheesy.” but his cheeks were tinted pink.

you smile wider, “just for you.” you lower a hand and start to pull away from him, intertwining that hand with his. this pulls a smile out of him.

he nods, humming again, “just for me.”

of course days like those pretty, lazy mornings don’t always last. they don’t last for long either. you breathe out a soft wheeze, your chest tightening as you trying to control your sobs. you weren’t used to crying so much, but you couldn’t help it. no, not this time.

“i’m just..” he says, anger starting to peak through, “i don’t know what you want anymore!”

you huff, “not this!” your hands were covered in blood; his blood. were you being over dramatic? you really didn’t think so. he was being irresponsible. “you have scholars, jeno! you have so many opportunities, and it’s fine that i don’t. you don’t need to punch every damn person who says something about me!” you were frustrated. these weren’t tears of sadness, these were tears of anger. but a part of you felt guilty. if it weren’t for you, then he wouldn’t have blood ridden all over his hands and his face wouldn’t have bruises and cuts. you sigh, dropping your head as you step away from him. the hand that was on his cheek dropped and you look defeated standing in front of him.

“i’m sorry.” it was quiet, but you heard it.

you look at your feet, your head running wild. he didn’t know you as well as he thought he did. you were driving yourself crazy, and he had no idea. you really couldn’t live this way. you were tearing both him and you apart the longer you grasped onto whatever the two of you had. you wipe your hands on the cloth you held, his blood staining it with remorse. you wince. when you finally look back up at him, his eyes are desperate.

you sigh again, “jeno.”

“don’t say my name like that,” he mumbles, “i hate when you talk to me like that.”

you would normally roll your eyes at his behavior, but you were too tired this time. so you just slumped your shoulders, “we can’t keep acting like this is fine.”

he adverts his gaze, finding the wall more interesting. “like what’s fine?” he knew. both of you knew. but he hated admitting you were right, because that meant losing you. and he couldn’t stand the thought of not waking up to you every morning. he couldn’t stand the thought of not being able to touch you anymore. he couldn’t stand the thought of you not being his. because you are his, you belong with him. he knew that’s exactly where you belonged.

you place the washcloth down, your breathing becoming even again. you were drowning. you felt like you were under thousands of feet of water. like the walls were closing in on you, and you couldn’t get out no matter how hard you pushed. that’s what loving jeno felt like. you would push and push and push, and some days it worked. some days you could breathe and feel the air. but then there were days like these, where you could feel your world collapsing and surrounding you like a vice. it was threatening. loving jeno was not healthy, not for either of you. and you knew him loving you was just as bad. the two of you tore each other apart, without even needing to try. you’re both from totally different world’s. and you knew it could never work in the long run. it was now, or ending up worse than ever later.

“can i play for you?” he says, suddenly breaking the silence and interrupting your thoughts.

you furrow your eyebrows, tilting your head in confusion, “what?”

“please,” he says softly, and he removes the ice pack he was holding on his knuckles to get up and drag you along to the piano room. you adjust to your surroundings, sitting on the piano chair like it was second nature. he walks over to his shelves of music sheets, carefully picking one out with no facial expression. when he places the piece down, you look at the title curiously. etude tableaux in e-flat minor op. 39. and you feel your heart start to break as he presses the first key, his eyes watering and his posture slightly sluggish. but his fingers do not waver, and his emotions don’t get the best of him. but you can feel the aching as he puts his all into playing for you. and you can feel the frustration building, the anger, the sadness, the self-pity. and it’s so heavy, the piece creating a heavy burden on your shoulders while your chest grows tight and your eyes turn into the ocean. you were drowning all over again. and so was he.

“i love you.” he says, his fingers still playing with intense emotion. and you search his face for something, anything. but his eyebrows are furrowed and the tears in his eyes are starting to fall onto the keys below him. but he plays through it. he plays through the pain, even if his hands are begging to stop. even when his back starts to pinch. even when his breathing grows deeper. because he needs this. he needs to play, one last time. just for you.

you look back at his eager hands, greedily pressing the keys and perfecting the piece in front of him. he played so beautifully, the piano being nothing than his own. he belonged like this. he was talented, nothing could stop him. you wipe your tear stained cheek, wiping your runny noise, too. he was playing what he couldn’t say. and you were listening, seeing as his bruised and bloody hands ached through it all. he was aching. in more than one way. and so were you. it was painfully beautiful, the piano ringing in your ears and you knew that you would never be able to listen to the piano the same after him. whoever he played for next, they were honored. and they should know it.

“i love you, too.” you say back. and the room tenses, but his fingers don’t stop. and he never once falters, never once interrupts and doesn’t let his nerves get the best of him. he finishes. for the first time ever being with you, he plays the whole entire piece. and by the end of it, the two of you had red eyes, noses stuffed and tears rolling shamelessly down your faces.

because this was it.

this was the end.

it wasn’t an ending you expected. it wasn’t something you planned, or ever really imagined how it would go. this was an ending made for the both of you. this was your last moment together. and you both knew it when the two of you made eye contact after the broken feeling piece was played. you huff out a breath of air, wiping away the tears that never seemed to stop flowing. no matter how much you begged them to stop, you knew they wouldn’t.

“i’m sorry, y/n.” he says again, looking you in the eyes this time.

“me too, jeno.”

“we tried.”

you nod your head, agreeing, “we did. we really did.”

your world didn’t fit in his. no matter how badly the two of you wanted it to work, it couldn’t. he was on a different level than you were. and you could no longer drag him down. and he could no longer break you apart. but, for that one split second of being content, he was all you needed. lee jeno was all you needed, and that was enough for you. you didn’t have to have special memories, because the ones with him were more than enough for you. the feeling he gave you, it was more than anything you’d ever felt before. and you knew you loved him. you didn’t know when it started, but you knew it wouldn’t end. you will always love him. even when the two of you most definitely split. you know he belongs in your heart, the way no one else could.

you tried. he tried. the two of you really did try.

and that’s all that matters.

i couldn’t convince you that the blue you see is the same blue that i see. but maybe that’s how lovers know they’re meant to love; they see the same blue. and they both know it.

a/n: i hope you enjoyed!

[cheershalo]

By request, here are some of my favorite angsty fics in order longest to shortest. Some of these are angstier than others but I wanted to give a good range!

*note: make sure to read the tags because some of these deal with heavier topics! take care of yourself!

*also: most of these are b!L because that’s what i like to read! smut or no-smut is marked as well as the basic tags!

Remember to leave kudos and comment on all these lovely fics if you decide to read!!

💔 pray for some sweet simplicity by @eeveelou​ | E | 237k | abo | b!L - (motorcycles, racer louis, journalist harry, slow burn, a classic)

An AU where motorcycle racing is the biggest sport in a heavily divided world, Louis is trying to take control of his own destiny, and Harry is in for more than he bargained for.

💔 Collision by @tequiladimples​ | E | 225k | b!L - (mythology/fantasy, fairy louis, dark harry, enemies to lovers, slow burn, love love love)

Mythology/Fairytale!AU in which Louis is a dainty fairy with a temper who wants to be intimidating and Harry hurts people. Naturally, they hate each other.

💔 And I Wait for Paradise by You_Just_Mightx3 | NR | 209k | abo | b!L - (addiction, ptsd, pining, best friends to lovers, eventual mpreg, so heartbreaking and heart-wrenchingly beautiful)

The one where it’s not the Harry who touched Louis’ heart that comes home, but an addict thought to be hopeless. A paradise above addiction when Louis wins so does Harry.

💔 Don’t Let It (Me) Break by @falsegoodnight​ | E | 169k | b!L - (exes to lovers, slow burn, grief, panic attacks, healing/therapy, sad louis, def read tags, a fav of all time)

The one where Harry is oblivious, Louis is broken, Zayn and Liam are in love, Gemma and Lottie are lovely, and Niall is just waiting for everyone to get their shit together.

Oh, and it's all Malcolm's fault.

💔 Saving Symphony Hall by @helloamhere​ | E | 125k | abo | b!L - (touch depri, businessman louis, hurt/comfort, a fav)

“I think I have an idea,” Louis said. Slowly, and reluctantly, but with a growing sense of the inevitable. “God damnit, I think I have a really good idea.”

“Oh christ, that's the problem-solving face,” Babs said. “Last time we saw that face, he sold a company.”

“Wait, what?” Zayn asked.

“Right place, right time,” Louis said. “Also, fuck my life,”

“What?” Zayn repeated. Niall patted his hand.

“I usually just roll with whatever Louis is about to do,” he said. “It’s better for us all.”

“That’s the attitude,” said Louis, “I’ll tell you tomorrow. Tonight, I need to do some research. Zayn, give me your number. I’m gonna save our symphony.”

💔 The Dead of July by whimsicule | M | 117k | b!L - (avengers au, captain america harry, louis as bucky, ptsd, so fucking good)

Harry is Captain America, and Louis’ been dead for 70 years.

💔 Untangle Me by suicxne | E | 103k | np smut - (canon compliant, friends to lovers, first kiss, cute <3)

The one where Harry and Louis finally get it right.

💔 nothing worsens, nothing grows by @soldouthaz​ | E | 103k | b!L - (roadtrip au, college au, enemies to lovers, friends with benefits, ot5, a fav of all time)

Another roadtrip AU featuring Harry as the misunderstood hipster, Louis as the bitter psych major, Liam as the one with the secret boyfriend, and Niall as the one who just wants everyone to be happy.

💔 Here in the Afterglow by @harrybridgers​ | NR | 89k | b!L - (high school au, historical, 70s au, small town, slow burn, strangers to friends to lovers, soft soft soft)

1970’s AU. In a tiny town in Idaho, Louis’ life is changed forever by the arrival of a curious stranger.

💔 And down the long and silent street by whimsicule | M | 86k | b!L - (historical au, regency au, poverty, wealth difference, hurt/comfort, a masterpiece <3)

Wherein Louis and Harry are on the opposite ends of the social ladder, but their paths still cross on the filthy streets Louis calls his home. The odds are staked against them from the beginning, and even more when Louis' past finally catches up with him.

💔 Consequences by @allwaswell16​ | E | 79k | b!L - (amnesia au, exes to lovers, hurt/comfort, secrets, amazing amazing)

Two years ago Harry let his powerful family come between him and the love of his life, something he deeply regrets. Louis has tried to move on from their devastating break up. Sometimes, he even thinks he has. It only takes one moment to freeze them back in time.

💔 We’ll Cast Some Light (You’ll Be Alright) by @harrybridgers​ | NR | 74k | b!L - (enemies to lovers, sort of exes to lovers, demons, demon hunters, INCREDIBLE)

There’s a standard procedure for this. Scan, track, kill. But with a solar eclipse and a Greater Demon with unfinished business looming, the path to keeping England safe from harm becomes complicated and shadowed by mystery and secrets. For Harry and his team, times have never been harder, especially when a few old friends turned foes show up. Harry is left with just over forty days to overcome the hurdle of tension between them and reconcile their past, and figure out just what Louis is hiding from him before it’s too late.

💔 Latibule by @quelquesetoiles​ | E | 54k | b!L - (spirited away au - ish, mythology, fantasy, god harry, human louis, sad louis, jealousy, amazing)

A Spirited Away AU of sorts where Louis just wants to heal and be left alone, only for all his plans to be destroyed by the hands of an infuriating British God.

💔 7 Up by @cherrystreet​ | E | 52k | b!L - (friends to lovers, growing up together, will make you cry like a baby, a classic)

Very loosely based on the British TV show "The Up Series" and somewhat inspired by the song “Something I Need” by Onerepublic, we follow the lives of Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson in an interview setting every seven years. They fall apart and come together, their lives and emotions recorded. Harry calls it a time capsule. Louis calls it a pain in the arse.

💔 Strangers in Love by @darlou | E | 42k | b!L - (amnesia au, car accidents, light d/s, growing up together, enemies to lovers, a fav)

Louis wakes up to find himself in a marriage with the last man he thought he'd ever end up with.

💔 Ever Fixed by @eeveelou​ | E | 42k | b!L - (strangers to lovers, divorce, depression, child death, the plot twist GOT ME SO GOOD - i read this yesterday with ris and h o l y s h i t)

Three years ago, Harry was happily married, successfully heading the largest technology company in the world, and raising his young daughter. After he loses nearly everything in the aftermath of his daughter’s lost battle with a rare brain tumor, it may take three strange and yet very familiar visitors – and a man from the therapy group Harry keeps refusing to go to – to get him back on track.

💔 before we knew by @falsegoodnight​ | E | 40k | b!L - (soulmate au, lawyer harry, editor louis, stubborn harry, pining louis, literally one of the best fics ever written) 

Louis has been skeptical of soulmates for years so it seems like fate when he finally bumps into the owner of the obnoxiously large signature printed into his skin since age sixteen: Harry Styles, a human rights attorney who is firmly against soulmates.

💔 where the lights are beautiful by twoshipsdrifting | M | 31k | abo | b!L - (THE accidental bonding fic, mentions of mpreg, have reread many times and it still hurts so good)

Harry wasn’t wrong about that, not in a general sense. Lots of omegas did seek out rich alphas and betas, hoping or planning to go into heat at the right time. Plenty of omegas saw this as their duty, especially if their families weren’t well off. Worse, Louis couldn’t honestly say he’d never thought about it.

If that had been his life, his goal, Louis would feel pretty good about himself now.

As it is…Louis feels like shit.

💔 autumn leaves by @suspendrs​ | NR | 28k | b!L - (war au, soldier harry, waiter louis, french louis, friends to lovers, so so good)

Harry is an American soldier in France during World War II, and Louis is a French waiter that doesn't mean to fall in love with him.

💔 Cherry by littlebluetui | M | 25k | b!L - (exes to lovers, famous harry, non-famous louis, comfort sex, light d/s, really good & really underrated!)

Harry and Louis were soulmates, no one doubted that.

Sometimes one soulmates leaves the other to go on a world tour though.

Sometimes not having them at all is better than only a little.

💔 like a bastard on the burning sea by vashtaneradas | NR | 22k | implied b!L - (cheating/infidelity - i don’t read cheating fics as a principle but this one just... hurts so good, haven’t reread and i don’t think i ever will but i think about it often)

Harry breaks Louis, Louis breaks everything.

💔 all this delusion in our heads by buttfucklarry | E | 15k | b!L - (exes to lovers, sad louis, sad harry, mentions of mpreg, another underrated beaut <3) 

After Harry and Louis break up, they cope with it in very different ways. What will happen when Harry keeps calling his ex over when things go wrong in his life, but Louis just can't take it anymore?

💔 a grocery list pinned in blue by dangerbears | NR | 20k | b!L - (exes to lovers, divorce, a masterpiece truly)

After eight years, Louis finally has everything he's wanted. Except for Harry.

💔 Cupid’s Chokehold by bluelemur | E | 35k | b!L - (soulmate au, cupid louis, human harry, virgin louis, feel good but also a bit angsty) 

Louis is a Cupid who tries to match up Niall and Harry. It doesn't work out as planned.

💔 Love is like this; not a heartbeat, but a moan by @loveletterharry​​ | E | 13k | abo | b!L - (enemies to lovers, ex-childhood best friends, pining harry, beach house, lovely)

In which Harry loves Louis, but Louis has been cold to him ever since he presented as an omega at age fifteen.

Eight years later, Louis approaches Harry with a request, and who is Harry to deny him?

Remember again to leave kudos and comment on all these lovely masterpieces! And feel free to let me know if I made any errors!

Request another category here. 

[baeklination]

Ocean: the deep (2)

Pic: comma.

Date: 210114

Warnings/Contains: angst, abuse (ment./emot.), gen.explicit language

Pairing: au! Baekhyun x F. Reader

WC: 7,9k

NOTE: It’s not all angst, but describing it as fluff feels off. On sensitive/explicit topics.

Prologue  Masterlist

                                    ¤¤

Alot of us tell ourselves “I’d know”, but chances are you wouldn’t. Not if they didn’t want you to. And if they did, showed you a sliver of the truth, would you be brave enough to see it instead of thinking up an excuse? 

                                     ¤¤

“Are you okay?”, Beanie asks, putting the break on her stroller so you can sit down on the park bench.

“Me? Yeah, I’m fine. A little tired. Still getting used to drinking wine instead of mixed drinks I guess.”

“No, not you. I mean you guys, you and Baekhyun.”

“What do you mean? You saw him last night.” Doubt finding its way to your mind - she has after all known him for longer than you. “Did...Did he say something to you?”

“No, but I noticed…”, she turns to you, stalling. “Don’t get mad, alright?”

“Why would I get mad?”

“Just… I’m gonna say something and I don’t want you to get mad at me.”

“Okay, I won’t get mad, Bean. What?”

“I’ve been married to Minnie for a while now, so I see Baekhyun alot, and I’ve heard some things - rumours I guess - that maybe, you know…”

“Don’t say it, Bean. Please don’t say it.” Heart sinking, you brace yourself and ask her.

“That he sleeps around..?”

“No, not that. More that he’s maybe...not so...kind.” 

“What..?”, you burst out.

“Like I said, it’s rumours, I never really hung out with his girlfriends before, so I wouldn’t know. But I…”

Beanie’s fidgeting makes your throat tighten.

“I feel like Baekhyun used to dote on you, but lately he’s been acting more like...your dad.”

“That’s ridiculous..!”, you say, swatting your hand in the air. “Besides, don’t dads dote on their kids, hm?” 

“But you’re not his daughter”, she says bluntly, fixing her eyes on you.

“Are you talking about something specific that happened last night?”

                                          ¤¤

  Hearing the lock turn you breathe a sigh of relief; having a dinner party at home without the owner of said home wasn’t your plan. Baekhyun stops in the living room to greet his guests and engage in the usual banter - as if he didn’t see half of them earlier in the day - before you hear his footsteps nearing the kitchen. 

“Sorry I’m late, sweetie. I just couldn’t seem to get out..!”, he huffs.

Putting on your best Suzy Homemaker air (jokingly, of course), you turn around with your arms open.

“You’re just in time, Baekhyun. Honestly, I just took the lasagna out of the oven.”

“Wow, this looks great…”, Baekhyun says, taking the sight of your carefully planned dishes in before kissing you. “But…Are you wearing that?”, he says leaning back, his eyes slightly narrowing.

“Hm? You picked this dress. Don’t you remember?”, you say puzzled.

“Of course I remember. But it’s...more for me, isn’t it? Just me. Maybe put on something more modest?”

“Modest..?”, you laugh. “This isn’t worse than any of the other girls...” 

“Well, you don’t have to be like them, do you? You’re my girl, aren’t you?”, he coos.

You know he’s being overly sensitive, but it won’t cost your ego much to change - not as much as this dinner ruined would, so you lift your hands up in defeat.

“Okay, you win”, you sigh.

His smile lights up not only his face, but your entire being. His hands on your cheeks is a promise of sweet touches to be given later on; his lips one of your name being whispered in love.

“I’ll set the table, sweetie.”

¤

“You changed your dress?”, Beanie asks.

“Serves me right for not wearing an apron”, you chuckle as you sit down.

Baekhyun takes your hand and smiles. 

“Please, everyone”, you gesture to the fully laden table “enjoy.”

                                        ¤¤

“No, I mean in general.”

“Well, in general, you’ve nothing to worry about. Sure, I don’t get flowers delivered every other day like before, but that’s because I practically live with him now. You know how it is”, you say, gesturing to her stroller. “The beginning is always a fairytale, and then it becomes something else. You don’t need all the trimmings when you realise you…”

“Love each other?”, Beanie says, leaning forward with big eyes.

“Yeah…”, you say, shrugging your shoulders.

“Baekhyun said the L word to you..!”

“A month ago. And every day since. God, why am I embarrassed to say it!? Stop laughing, Bean!”

“I’m sorry. This is great!”, Beanie replies, clapping her hands. “Now I feel bad for dragging him like that...”

“I won’t tell on you.” You sit quiet for a moment, then continue. “And when you say “dad”, if you mean how he sometimes suggests things for me to do, or wear, I dunno, it’s because I’ve asked him to. You know I’m not from around here, so sometimes when we go places, say for dinner, I want to know what cutlery to use, or what those goddamn french words mean, you know. It’s embarrassing - for me - to be so obviously misplaced…”

“Shit, don’t I know it…”, Beanie shakes her head. “What? You know I grew up on the other side. First time Minnie took me to a corporate event...he called it “a party”, so you know I rolled up in my shortest sequin number and my highest glitter heels… Shit, the looks I got!”, she wheezes.

“Those stiffs must’ve thought you were the entertainment!”

“Hey! But you’re right. I tell you, Minnie didn’t get any for a week.”

After wiping her tears Beanie gets serious again:

“I’m sorry, alright? Only looking out for you. But who knows...soon I might be looking for a maid of honour attire”, she smirks.

You cross your fingers and smile back.

                                         ¤¤

“I’ll be a happy man the day I don’t have to read the name Seung Inc. again”, Baekhyun sighs and slumps down on the couch, lifting your head to rest on his thigh.

“Settlement getting the better of you?”

“Their stupidity might”, he chuckles, giving you a kiss. “I’ll take Ga’ round the block before bed.”

“No, I can do it.”

“I could use some fresh air. And your overdramatic drama starts soon, doesn’t it?”

“It’s a perfectly lifelike show, Baekhyun. What, you mean your boss doesn’t slap you cross the face?”, you giggle, remembering his disbelief at the scene.

“No, but I might slap him one of these days. Come on Ga’”, he says, getting up and patting his thigh. “Gawa, come here.”

Gawa doesn’t move, so you nudge him off of the couch:

“Go!”

“Why do I always have to call that dog three times?”, Baekhyun shakes his head.

“What that dog thinks is anyone’s guess. He probably likes the way you say his name. Don’t forget-”

“Bags. I know.”

  Feeling a little antsy you busy yourself with a bit of tidying up in the kitchen, emptying the dishwasher, wiping the counters and the like. There’s really no need, as you’ve already done it, but it’s something to do while waiting for Baekhyun to come back, for him to go to bed. “Take it easy. It’s just a search, what’s gonna happen? Nothing. It’s not true, so nothing.” 

When he’s finally tucked in you bring in his water bottle - which he always forgets - and put it on the nightstand. 

“Thanks.”

“All set?”

“Beyond all set…”

“Mm, I can see you won’t need a bedtime story to fall asleep”, you say, running your fingers through his hair.

“Depends…”, he says, seemingly half asleep. “Depends on the story”, he smiles, guiding your hand downwards.

You pull it away. When he doesn’t even bother opening his eyes you know he wasn’t serious anyway, so you turn off the light and say goodnight, closing the door behind you.

                                     ¤¤ 

  Finishing your show you mute the TV and sit still for a while, making sure you can’t hear any sound except Gawa’s snoozing. “Let’s just do this.” You grab your computer and start reading. You’re relieved to find you can’t relate to most of the things you read, but once in a while the text makes you stop;

Patronizing; one month: 

Going through your phone Baekhyun had laughed when you suggested he wouldn’t like finding you going through his. “Go ahead. But I doubt you’d be able to discern anything.”

“What, ‘cus I’m not a corporate lawyer suddenly I’m dumb..?”

“No...But put it this way. Since I am a lawyer I know certain things. But you know things I don’t, sweetie. Like scanning barcodes, or working a cash register. That’s more your thing”, he had smiled. 

You had definitely felt some kind of way about the conversation. But seeing as he’d already said he wasn’t calling you dumb you didn’t find the words to approach it without it seeming like you were picking a fight.

“Joking”: Two months:

 “Baekhyun, I don’t think this is my size. Why’d you cut the label off?”

“It was huge. I knew you’d do it anyway. Maybe you’ve gained weight…”,  he said, chuckling at how the fabric cut into your waist.

You knew you hadn’t, and comparing it to your other trousers, the one he bought was definitely smaller.

Monitoring your whereabouts: three months:

Stacking condiments on the shelf at work you’d seen him coming down the aisle; a lovely surprise in the middle of a long shift. “Hi..! What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t answering your phone, just wanted to see you’re okay.”

“I don’t have it on me, you know that.”

“Okay, you got me. I was gonna pretend I wanted snacks, but really I missed you.”

You had found it adorable that he’d gotten into the car just to see you. But had he maybe done it to see if your text was true - if you were really covering a shift for a sick coworker? 

“Sweetie…”

Drunk with sleep you rub your eyes. Baekhyun is kneeling next to the couch, the white light from your laptop making him an angelic figure in the otherwise dark room.

“Oh”, you scrunch your face. “I must’ve fallen asleep…”

“You must have”, he says, brushing your hair behind your ear. “Who’s being abused?”

You jerk, suddenly fully awake, and look at your screen: “Signs to look out for”. You scramble to sit up and close the web browser.

“No, Beanie just-”

“Minnie’s abusing Beanie?”

“No. Someone in her mom circle...she thought maybe. I don’t know…” You know it’s impossible Baekhyun doesn’t hear the lie, but he doesn’t let on. “I just thought I’d see if there’s anything she could look...out for, you know. She’s busy with the baby and all...”, you shrug your shoulders, trying to brush it off as nothing special.

“If she’s that busy maybe she shouldn’t put her nose in other people’s business”, he says, cocking his head.

There’s an almost undetectable smile on his lips which sends a shiver through your body.

“It’s not like that, she-”

“Come to bed”, he says getting up on his feet.

“I... Come on, Gawa.”

“No, he stays. I don’t want him in the room.”

  There’s something distinctly different in how his shoulders look as he walks away. Something that makes you drag out your visit to the bathroom, hoping he’ll be asleep by the time you’re done. Tiptoeing into your room you breathe a sigh of relief, until you get into bed and he immediately rolls over to hug you. Any other day this would’ve been nothing less than what you expected - and wanted - but now all you can think of is how fast your heart is beating, and whether he can feel it or not. And Beanie…“What if he asks her? I can’t tell her to lie for me, then I’d have to explain why I did it in the first place…” But your thoughts are interrupted when Baekhyun exhales loudly into your neck and pulls your body closer, easing you out of your underwear.

                                         ¤¤

  Cutting the alarm at 08.15 you sit up to find the bed empty. Well, empty of Baekhyun. He’d let the door stay open for Gawa to jump into bed, as he is now halfheartedly wagging his tail, looking at you. The fact that he’s not already in your face, vying for your attention means Baekhyun has both walked and fed him. And that means he’s not angry with you about last night.

“Ay, ay”, you sigh getting out of bed, tying your robe tightly. “Maybe I should cut back even more on my hours like he wants. Whaddya say, Ga’? Staying home watching dramas all day, wouldn’t that be something?” 

 Shuffling out to the kitchen you see a note on the counter: “I’m meeting Seung Inc.redible ass for dinner. Home early, call me if you want take out.” Baekhyun always ends his notes with a star. Never a heart, or a smiley, but a star. Today it makes you pause, mulling last night over in your head. Not so much thinking as feeling. “Sweetie…” Nothing had happened, yet deep down you know something had. But since it is deep down you swat it away with ease, going about your day as planned. 

  Coming back to your apartment to find half of your plants either dead or hanging on to life by a thread was the twig that broke the back of your dubble home lifestyle. The surfaces being covered in dust and your clothes smelling stuffy was just icing on said broken back. 

“...and cleaning up feels like a waste since I’ll be gone and the same thing’s gonna happen..”, you complain over the phone to Baekhyun. 

“Sweetie..? Are you asking me if you can move in with me..?”, Baekhyun says at the other end. You can tell he has a smile on his face.

“Wha-no… I’m not”, you laugh, suddenly realising that’s exactly what it sounds like. “I was just venting.”

“So you don’t wanna move in with me?”

If you say yes it will really seem as if you were fishing, so you just stare at the phone. 

“You there…?”

“Yeah, I just… Are you really asking?”

“Yes…”

What you want to do is swing from your lamp like it’s a merry-go-round and scream, but you keep it cool, clearing your throat.

“Well, it’s a pretty big decision. Of course I’d say yes, but I have to confer with my associate.”

“This associate of yours, does it happen to be a big furry thing who is probably lying next to you, listening in..?”

“Maybe…”

“Mr. Gawa, I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse.”

“Baekhyun! I’ve seen that movie - it’s not a good offer..!”, you holler.

“Okay, okay”, he laughs. “My offer is love. Good enough?”

You scrunch your face and smother a yelp of delight.

“Good enough, Baekhyun…”

“Great”, he huffs. “Typical Seung, calling to rain on my happy moment… You’ll come home tonight then?”

“My first night as the lady of the manor, wouldn’t miss it. Go easy on him..! Love you.”

“Love you. Bye.”

  You sit in disbelief for a moment. Did an everyday phone call with Baekhyun just end in you moving in with him? A dozen unfinished thoughts goes through your mind; giving up the apartment seems daunting somehow; what do I do with all my stuff; does he have room for what I wanna bring..? But it is mostly happy thoughts painted in pink.

“Hope this puts an end to the tiffs we’ve had lately. Brings it back to how it was before”, you sigh. “Look alive, Gawa - you’re moving up in the world..!”, you say, wrestling with him for a bit.

                                           ¤¤ 

“Agh!”, you huff, kicking your shoes off in the hallway and dropping your bag on the floor.

Baekhyun, for once home earlier than you, gives you a curious look from the sofa.

“Rough day?”

“My car won’t start..!”

“How’d you get home?”

“It was fine, but when I turned the ignition off my headlights wouldn’t go out, so I was gonna do it again, but it wouldn’t start. I’ve been sitting in the parking lot for fifteen minutes revving the engine like Wacky Races..! I had to cut the battery ‘cus of the lights”, you complain, slumping down next to him with your head in his lap. “I was so angry I almost forgot Ga’ in the car. Ahh, that fucking car, Baekhyun..!”, you laugh desperately.

“You gonna leave it at the shop?”

“I can’t afford it right now. Not again.”

“Don’t be silly, I’ll pay for it.” 

“I don’t want you to. I’ll take the bus.”

“What’s a bus?”, Baekhyun frowns, choking a smile.

You roll your eyes at him and shake your head, as if you don’t think him playing with high class manners is funny. 

“Wait, I wanna lie down”, he says, stretching out on the couch with you as his blanket.

“I’ll give you money for the cab tomorrow”, he says, kissing your hand.

“There’s no cab. I’m taking the bus. But thank you.”

“Some start to being the lady of the manor… Speaking of which, did you give your… How many months is the notice...?”

“Three. No, I…”, you pause.

Baekhyun shakes his head a little, a question.

“I thought you might wanna talk it over.”

“We already did..? You having second thoughts?”

“Of course not..! It was just in case, since I was whining about it, maybe you asked...on the spur of the moment, kinda?”

His honeyed laughter rings in your ears.

“You think I’d ask you to move in on the spur of the moment?”

“Well, no...when you say it like that it sounds different..!”

“ Ah, what to do with you, sweetie”, he sighs. “You wanna have a party maybe?”

“A party?”

“Not a rave, but invite a few people, you know.”

“Hm...eh, I hadn’t...hm, okay.”

“We don’t have to.”

“No, I just hadn’t thought about it. It’ll be fun, let’s do it. Wait, I don’t even know - do you have a storage room in the building? If my stuff can fit there or whether I should rent something?”

“You’re bringing your things here, aren’t you?”

“I mean the big things, my furniture and…”

“You don’t need them anymore, just throw them out? Or are you planning on leaving me..?”, Baekhyun teases.

“Nooo. But I spent money on them, I don’t wanna just chuck ‘em out.”

“It’s stupid, but do as you wish”, he sighs.

“It’s not. Humour me. For a while at least.”

In these mundane things is where your heart is, feeling Baekhyun’s breathing and warmth through his thin t-shirt while he watches the news, lightly scratching the nape of your neck, but otherwise paying no particular attention to you. 

                                         ¤¤ 

  Even though you at first hadn’t a thought of having a moving-in party, the thought really grew on you, and you decided to throw something together. It was all rather ad-hoc: drinks, ramyun, games, a few shiny balloons you’d gotten from work and a dozen guests. Most of them were from Baekhyun’s office, but that didn’t matter, you knew and liked them well enough. Oddly enough, Beanie hadn’t gotten back to you today. You knew she was coming, she’d been too excited about the news not to, but you couldn’t get a hold of her now. You’d been checking your phone so often it was borderline rude, so you’d left it in the kitchen for some peace of mind, but now hearing your ringtone you excuse yourself and dash to get it. It’s not her.

“Hey, I forgot the code to the gate..?”

“Didn’t I send you a text with it?”

“Oh… I forgot that to..! Sorry, be right up.”

  Without being unappreciative of the friends that are here you can’t help missing the one who isn’t. You could probably drink and laugh away the night with anyone of these people, but with Beanie it’s different. You don’t know if it’s because both of you are from “the other side of the tracks” and somehow ended up in fancy places, but you do know your connection with her was instant, like meeting your twin from another lifetime. You know her word is her bond and that’s why her silence unnerves you.

“Problem?”

A little startled, you spin around to see Baekhyun.

“Nah, just Katy asking for the code.”

“Really..?”, he frowns. “You seem a bit…” 

“I thought it might be Bean…”, you shrug your shoulders. “Can you try Minnie, please?”

“He’s out of town on business”, Baekhyun replies casually.

“What?”

“He had to go, sweetie.”

“Had to go? Don’t you decide that?”

“What’s your point?”

“Well… Why didn’t you tell me?” 

Baekhyun cocks his head to the side. It makes your chest tighten.

“You want me to ask you how to do my job?”

“Of course not”, you say, deflated. “I’m just disappointed.”

“Well, you have guests in the other room. Maybe you should think more about them instead of sitting in here having a tantrum over someone who doesn’t even answer your calls. Shouldn’t you?”

You don’t want to let Baekhyun off the hook for not telling you about Min, but you know it wouldn’t make a difference if you continued. 

“I just don’t get why Beanie’s not picking up… What if something’s wrong?”

“She has a kid, she’s probably busy. And at this hour”, he says, looking at his watch “...she probably has her phone on mute. Come on now. I spent a lot of money on this, you don’t wanna ruin it for everyone, do you?”

Letting his words sink in, logic and guilt alike, you come to terms with the situation and realise that you really don’t want to ruin it for everyone, or yourself. You shake your head with a crooked smile.

“That’s my girl. No more pouting”, Baekhyun says, with a light poke on your nose. 

  Getting into bed you look through your phone one last time; check the call log and text messages, in case you’ve somehow clicked Beanie away, but there’s nothing there. Now, with not so little alcohol in your system you don’t worry about her being okay, but about your friendship. Had you done something wrong? Or rather, did she think you had; had she misunderstood something maybe? You try to put it out of your mind, but it sits like a little pebble in your gut, only given a break by Baekhyun.

“Thank god they’re gone..!”, he exclaims, dragging you on top of him. 

“You talked the most, drank the most-”

“I was trying to scare them away”, he laughs between kisses. “Every fucking time you moved on the couch I imagined it was me under there… Now be a good girl and ride me, sweetie.”

                                        ¤¤ 

As you hadn’t been able to get a hold of Beanie the following couple of days you had made up your mind to go to her and Minnie’s home - one of these days. Deciding to do something and having the courage to do it can be two very different things, and it fell on divine intervention to push you forward.

Waiting for Baekhyun to pick you up from the mall you spot Minnie walking across the parking lot.

“Min..!”, you shout, zig-zagging your way through the parked cars.

He smiles when he spots you, but you detect a degree of discomfort in it.

“Oh, hi. What are you doing here?”

“I’ve been to lunch with my mom, just waiting for Baekhyun to pick me up.”

“Lunch date with mom, that’s nice. I haven’t seen you in a while, how are you?”, he asks, as he starts for his car again.

“I’m good. You?”

“I’m good, just came back from out of town-”

“Yeah”, you interrupt. “That’s actually what I wanted to ask you about… Is Beanie alright? She didn’t come to my party and I can’t get a hold of her.”

“Yeah, she’s fine. You know how it is, busy with the baby and all… She probably just forgot.”

 Even with his face turned away as he’s putting his bags in the trunk you can tell he’s not being honest. You’re not sure if you want to know why though. You study his face as he rounds the car to the driver’s door - he’s clearly uncomfortable, trying to force a normal demeanour, so you press him on it.

“But I don’t think she’d forget about it. Or not get in touch on her own - we talk almost every day, Min.”

“Shit...”, he says, fidgeting with the keys. “I asked her not to go, okay. To keep a little distance for a while.”

“From me? Why? I thought we were-”

“No, it’s…”

They way he’s frowning and struggling with his words you know why.

“Baekhyun asked me to”, he finishes, holding his hands up in defeat.

“What, no. You must’ve misunderstood, Min”, you say, not wanting to let on what you’re really thinking. “Why would he?”

“He didn’t say, he just… Aeh, you know what? Maybe I did misunderstand him. Talk to him when you see him, it’s probably nothing”, he says, getting into the car.

“Yeah, I’ll tell him you ruined my party over nothing”, you chuckle. “Tell Bean to answer next time, alright?”

“Will do. See you around?”

“See ya”, you say, waving him off.

  You spend the few minutes you have left to wait wondering - fearing - why Baekhyun would ask such a thing of Minnie. Actually, you’re not wondering at all - you know why. But if that’s the case what does it mean? Why wouldn’t he sit down with you and have a conversation about it like an adult? Why would he essentially order Min to keep her away? He must know what it looks like… And what would Beanie think it looks like? What the hell are you gonna tell her when you see her again? “If you see her, you mean? I will see her.” You promise yourself you won’t let Baekhyun get away with this, that you’re gonna have a proper talk about it. But your resolve gets a nick as soon as you get in the car, for a moment pretending that it might just be a misunderstanding…

“How’s your mom?”

“You know, same old, same old.”

“Nothing new on the westfront..?”, he smiles at you and takes your hand.

“Not much. But I saw Min. Bumped into him, I mean. Just now.”

You can’t tell if you sound casual. When Baekhyun tightens his grip on your hand you definitely feel less than casual.

“Hm. Beanie?”

“No, it was just him. He-”

“So what’d he say?”, he asks, keeping his eyes on the road.

This is your in, but you’re not as brave as you were five minutes ago. If you bring it up you can’t unsay it and everything that follows will be your doing; do you want to spend a wonderful evening with your man or do you want to walk around on glass shards?

“Beanie thinks you don’t like her…”

He spares you a quick glance with a furrowed brow.

“He said that?”

“Not exactly. He said, eh, I don’t wanna be a tattle tale...”

“What are you, ten years old?”, he scoffs. “We can talk about it when we get home”, he continues and lets go of your hand. 

 It’s sickening, the darkness that emanates from him. Even shifting in your seat to look out the window you feel like a bother to him. You don’t want to “talk about it”, you want to shout at him for trying to decide who your friends are, and for cutting you off. But you also wanna sweep it under the rug, beg his forgiveness with your saddest eyes and let him know he’s more important than anyone else.

                                            ¤¤

  From the garage to the elevator to the hallway, every step feels like you're walking closer to springing a bear trap you set for yourself.

“You’re hovering...”, Baekhyun notes when you stand by the kitchen island, watching him scroll through his phone.

“Well, you said...we were gonna talk…”

“What’s there to talk about?”

You look at him, dumbfounded, until he puts away his phone and raises a questioning eyebrow.

“Minnie. Did you say anything to him about Beanie? I’m hoping it’s a misun-”

“That he should keep her away? Yeah.”

“Why would you do that? She’s my friend!”

“Don’t raise your voice at me.”

“Baekhyun…”

You try to find the right words as your eyes start burning, but end up throwing your hands up in defeat.

“She’s my friend…”

“Sweetie”, he says, coming up to you, looking down at you. “I’ve known her longer than you, I think I know what’s best.”

“I can take care of myself. Make my own decisions.”

“Sure you can. But I’m the one who moved you from a tiny apartment to a skyrise flat, no?”, he chuckles.

You know he sometimes has a tendency to poke fun at you, but this was different. Going from letting you know it doesn’t matter what your paycheck says to making sure you know it does - the audacity doesn’t make you angry, it hurts you.

“Why do you have to put me down? Like in the car, when you called me ten..”

“What am I supposed to do with you when you act like this then?” Pausing, seemingly drawing pleasure from your expression he continues in a softer tone, putting his arms around you “I was only kidding, you’re too sensitive, sweetie.”

“I guess I am...”, you whisper, knowing you can’t make him listen anyway. “I’m gonna take Ga’ out.”

   Giving Baekhyun the silent treatment doesn’t work. He sees through it, thinks it’s childish and wants no part of it. Besides, he’s better at it than you are; making some calls, working in his home office, reading the paper while seemingly not noticing your silent rebellion. After a while the TV and Gawa can’t keep your fearful thoughts away, the ones where he decides you’re no fun anymore. The clock is creeping closer to dinner time and that’ll be make or break as you see it - making up and eating together or eating alone and making a bad situation worse. You don’t want to give up even more of your pride, but his silence won’t stop any other way. “And besides, a relationship is about diplomacy. Sometimes you have to let the other person win.. It’s normal.”

 You walk past his study and the kitchen to find him lying in bed with his phone. Quiet as a mouse you sit down on your end, suddenly scared it won’t work, that he’ll brush away your attempt at reconciliation like so many bread crumbs from the mattress. “Do I beg?” A part of you is disgusted with yourself because you know he’s waiting for you to crawl back. He doesn’t look at you when you turn around to face him, but oh, he’s waiting alright. Shuffling up next to him you cautiously lower yourself down, hoping he’ll let you in. When he moves his arm for you to lay down, putting it around you when you have, the release you feel is immeasurable. Winning or losing isn’t so important. Baekhyun is. He runs his hand over your hair, eyes still fixed on the phone, you stretch your arm out, tucking your fingers beneath his shirt to feel his warm torso. That other stuff may be important, but not right now. 

                                            ¤¤

“Dear Diary in my head… Why didn’t I say anything? I’m not afraid of him, so why was I afraid to? I was lazy ‘cus I didn’t wanna go on with the fight. But I’m not a fucking school girl wanting a boy’s approval, so I should’ve insisted. Now it sounds pathetic, “I should’ve insisted I be allowed to see Beanie”, like he’s my dad - shit, that’s what Beanie said… I AM allowed to see her, goddamn it, and I will, I don’t care. He’s the one being unreasonable - as if I love every single one of his friends..! If that article is what he's mad about it doesn't even make sense, ‘cus he’s not like that. But what if he is...like that rumour she was talking about… Jesus CHRIST, I’d know if he was! Now I’m just winding myself up ‘cus I’m irritated, stop it. I know how he is; hot headed in the moment, but forgets about it quickly. I mean what, he’s gonna hate on his colleagues wife forever? Ah-ah, he’ll get over it. And I need to stop being such a pushover when we argue, that’s for damn sure…”

                                           ¤¤ 

“How many times have you seen her?”, Baekhyun asks coldly, holding up your phone.

You hadn’t, as you first thought, forgot to take it with you to the bedroom last night - he’d taken it before you woke up. There’s no room for you to come up with a lie, white or other. Actually, this time there’s not even room for your dread as you immediately get pissed off at him for taking it.

“I didn’t opt out of having a password for you to go through my phone”, you say sternly, going to retrieve it from him. When he moves you fix your eyes on him “Baekhyun..!”

“How many times?”

“A few times. She’s my friend, and I missed her. I know y-”

“A few times?”

There’s a glint in his eye that makes you unsettled so you make like you’re starting breakfast, with him following you.

“What do you talk about?”

“Nothing. This and that…”

“For example..?”

“I don’t keep a log, do I?”, you mumble sarcastically, more to yourself than him. 

Before you have time to react he's grabbed your arm, making your head bounce against the wall.

"What did you just say?", he spits in your face, but seeing how you cower, eyes locked on his hand hanging in the air, he remembers himself. "So fucking dumb", he hisses, releasing his grip on you with a shove to the side.

Toppling over, trying to compose yourself you see him snatching his blazer from his seat before leaving. 

  In an instant Baekhyun has made you so small you feel that the chairs, table and island are all towering up around you where you sit on the floor. Your eyes are fixed on the door, terrified you’re going to see the lock turn open. You won’t hear it through the piercing sound in your ears. “He was gonna hit me…” Understanding he’s not coming back you stand up, bracing yourself against the wall. What now? You look around aimlessly, not even realising you’re clutching your arm, until you see your phone on the counter. Like a bolt the obvious answer hits you: “You can’t stay.”  Hurrying to the closet you grab one of Baekhyun’s overnight bags - he won’t miss it - and open the drawers, grabbing a handful of everything and stuffing them in it; tearing clothes off their racks, making the hangers fall to the floor with a clank and sweep toiletries in  with one movement. Lacing up your shoes your heart threatens to break your chest in half. You repeatedly call Gawa, then remember your mom’s had him a few nights.

“Where’s my...” You look around for your jacket in a fever, unable to focus. 

“Did he take my jacket? My keys...no...”, you think even though you’re certain you never saw him with it.

“Ah!”

 Running to your room you breathe a sigh of relief when you see it hanging on a chair; putting it on you check your pockets to see everything’s there and *qo...*. You freeze. Was that the bolt sliding? Not hearing any other sounds you slide your phone open, ready to call whomever, leaving sweat marks over the screen, and inch your way out to the dining room. 

“Baekhyun..?”

 Your bag is right there. If he’s somehow managed to come in without you hearing it, he’s seen it, and with the open floor plan the only doors in the apartment are on the bathroom, office and walk-in closet - all situated round the entrance. You can’t lock yourself in. Your gut churns as you expect him to round the corner with his head to the side - the way it always is when he disapproves of something. Feeling like he’s toying with you, you give way to despondency, wiping your tears before you keep walking and turn the corner. But he’s not there. The door is locked. You sink down on wobbly legs, catching your breath. Grabbing your bag you hear that sound again, and realise it was just a glass bottle in the bag settling, knocking against another one. 

“Fuck! Jesus Christ…”

 Sitting down you start thinking about where to go. In the back of your head you’d assumed your mom’s place, but now you see there are only two ways that could go: you don’t tell her why, so she’ll invite Baekhyun in when he comes looking or you do tell her and she’ll insist you report him to the police. But what’s there to report? “He DIDN’T hit me. He grabbed your arm! Yeah, he grabbed my arm in a fight when he found out I’d been lying to him… They won’t do anything…”

“Why did I lie to him..! None of this would've happened if I’d been honest, just told him the first time I saw her. And if I hadn’t acted like that when he asked… Of course he'd be angry, anyone would. Being angry is one thing, punching someone is different. But he didn't… I mean, haven't I been so annoyed I've wanted to hit him? It's not the same thing! Why not? Because he happens to be stronger than me? It's still violence...You KNOW why it isn't… If he HAD, sure, I'd never let him near me again, but he didn’t. He wouldn’t… He wouldn’t.”

 Going back and forth with yourself in your head was just a formality and a way to convince yourself you're the type of person that 1: won't tolerate being treated like shit, and 2: would give someone a second chance. “Everyone deserves a second chance. At least a chance to explain themselves.” 

Putting your things back you make sure they are exactly as they had been, while ignoring the voice that asks why you’re worried he might be able to tell a difference. Now there’s nothing left to do but somehow pass the excruciatingly long hours until he gets off work...

                                        ¤¤

 Not hearing from Baekhyun all day had you go from thinking he’d been wrong to fearing he’d still think you were.

If you can forgive him then surely he can forgive you, right? If he’s still angry, you’ll make an effort; if he doesn't say anything about it, neither will you. You’ll go on as usual, have a visit with your mom, be fine. 

Standing in front of the mirror in your closet, trying to figure out what top to wear has a different feeling to it today; you're trying to cover up your arm. There isn't any bruising on it as far as you can tell, but you never know… When the lock turns your pulse goes up. You’ve been anxiety ridden all day, as well as longing for him to come home, so you can really put this thing past you and go back to normal. 

He peeks in through the door with a gentle smile and presents a bouquet - yellow peonies.

"I think roses are the official flower of apology, but I know how you love these."

“He’s not mad, thank God, he’s not mad…” 

"I don't know what came over me”, he starts, coming up to you. “It must be all the stress at work, with the buy-out and I… I would never hurt you! When I saw that look in your eyes I couldn’t believe what I was doing-”

“Why didn’t you call me all day?”, you ask, teary-eyed with relief.

“I wanted to, sweetie, but I...every time I picked up the phone I saw that look and I didn’t know what to say… I’ll never hurt you again, I swear.”

“You real...really scared me”, you manage to say through choppy breaths.

“I know. I’ll do whatever you want, give you anything you want”, he says, hugging you tightly “...just forgive me.”

You don’t take pleasure in seeing him distraught, but note that suddenly the roles are reversed - he’s the one pleading, and you have the power to lift him up.

“You have to promise me, Baekhyun.”

“I promise, sweetie. I promise..!”

He tips your head up by the chin:

“You believe me, right?"

With such sincerity in his eyes and tremble in his voice, how could you not?

“Good”, he says when you nod, giving you your long awaited kiss. “I’m so sorry…”

“Let’s...”, you exhale deeply, turning to the mirror again.“Let’s not talk about it anymore, okay?”

“Sure. What are you up to?”

“I'm just deciding what to wear. We have to be at my mum's in forty-five minutes, so if you're gonna shower before we go…”

Coming up to stand behind you in the mirror, the way he puts his hands on your shoulders makes you wince, if ever so slightly. But he doesn't notice. 

"Do you really think it's a good idea for us to go over there today? I think we could really need this time for ourselves. Don't you agree?"

"But I've already told her we're coming over…"

"I know, but with everything that's been going on… Tell you what...You go put these in water and I'll give her a call, tell her I've got a migraine."

"I have to get Gawa, she's had him four days already", you say, happy to have found a good reason for going over.

"She won't mind will she?", he asks, spinning you around to look you in the eyes. "Aren't I as important as him? I've really missed you today, sweetie."

You don't want to upset him again, and you've really missed him too. So you give in. 

Curled up on the sofa with your head on Baekhyun's chest, his fingers are playing with your hair.

"Sweetie? Have you thought about maybe letting your mum have Gawa?"

"Have him? Past tomorrow?"

"Keep him. For good, I mean."

"What? No, why?"

"Don't get upset", he says soothing you. "I don't mean he can't come over from time to time."

A sickening feeling creeps into your heart, but not wanting to risk another fight so soon you hold your tongue. Nonchalantly flipping through the channels on the TV he adds:

"We don't have to decide anything now. It's just...something to think about."

                                            ¤¤ 

  Drying your hands after finishing up the dishes at your mom's you hear Baekhyun from the living room:

"... to have him full time."

Your stomach's in knots as you join them. Baekhyun smiles and grabs your hand. 

"I was just telling your mom how we think she should keep Gawa - if you want to, of course", he adds thoughtfully, looking at your mom. 

"But he's your everything, honey", your mom, correctly, points out. "Why would you ev-"

She cuts herself off with eyes growing wide.

"Are you pregnant..!? Oh, oh..!", she blurts out before you can stop her.

"No!"

Baekhyun bursts out laughing, pulling you to sit on his lap.

"Not yet, mother. But who knows, might not be too long before you hear the tapping of little feet around here…", he jokes.

At least you hope he is. Not feeling entirely comfortable with the turn the conversation has taken, you get up, calling Gawa to you. 

"Well, I guess we should be going, mom. Come on, Baekhyun, Ga'."

There's a flicker in Baekhyun's eyes, but you know he won't make a scene in front of your mom.

"We'll give you some time to think about it", he says, hugging her goodbye. 

You can feel the cold emanating from him like dry ice in the elevator. 

"I'll drop you off at home before I head into the office", he says, clearing his throat. 

"It's Saturday, you're off."

"I might as well get some work done if you don't want to be with me. If you choose that animal over me."

                                         ¤¤

  Forty-eight hours ago you had been looking forward to the weekend; visiting your mom with your handsome, successful boyfriend and winding down with the love of your life - Gawa. But nothing had gone the way you had imagined. Even after the incident it was as if Baekhyun hadn't let go of your arm, keeping you under his eye and forcing you to prove your loyalty to him. But then again, you had just been through something big, however short it was. It was only natural he'd want a little more attention from you than normal, right? He probably didn't mean for you to give Gawa up for good, it was just bad wording. He loved seeing you happy, why else would he buy you flowers and jewellery, insist that you cut back your hours at work to be home more, call you every other hour to say hi? 

  Thinking about it in those terms made it simple - if not easy - for you to do what he wanted. Because he was what you wanted, wasn't he? So, not having told him you were returning Gawa to your mom the same day you were waiting for him to come back home. What had started as excitement about pleasing him had, as the hours passed, turned into a tremendously guilty conscience and now, lying in bed as he approaches, you can't even pretend to be happy.

"Why is it so dark in here?", he asks, throwing his blazer on the bed. "Where's Ga'? Gawa..!", he calls.

"He's not here", you answer him, your back still turned against him. "He's with mom…"

"Oh, sweetie", he sighs, laying down behind you, giving you a kiss on the neck. "I didn't mean for you to take him back today. Turn around, let me see that pretty face. That's better", he says, brushing the hair out of your eyes.

"My red eyes and runny nose is better?", you pout, partly fishing for a compliment. 

"Mm-hm. Of course I don't like to see you sad, but I really appreciate what you've done. It shows that you respect me. That you really care about me."

Little by little his words push away your melancholy. The way he's looking at you now, with his gentle brown eyes and sweet smile, prickles your skin. This is the reaction you had wanted from him.

"And besides…", he continues, slipping his hand under your t-shirt "I've been thinking about what your mother said… About a baby."

"No. Baekhyun, that's insane. That’s…"

"Why? Too soon? Who decides that? Look...", he says, nudging your t-shirt up to show your stomach "...can't you imagine a little Baekhyun growing in here? Or my daughter? Walking in the park with the stroller, showing the baby to everyone at work… I’d show you off to everyone the minute I found out."

“Aeh..”, you swat your hand as he gets up, but when he’s out of the room you scrunch your face with delight at the thought of it. Somehow you can see it. But in your stomach isn't just the butterflies of an imagined little life - it’s the whispered knowledge that you've left the right love behind.

[angelkurenai]

His Princess - Chris Evans x Reader

Title: His Princess

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: None

Prompt: Hello!! I’m so happy your requests are open again! Can you write Chris Evans going on set to his gf’s music video of "Beauty and the Beast" (w/ John Legend) and he’s so happy to date a «princess» please?

“Alright, one more for the net. Just stay like that, you look wonderful!”

You couldn't help but giggle at the enthusiasm of the young assistant. What with your manager being unable to show up any of the days of the filming the way she normally would and her always wanting you to have someone with you all the time besides bodyguards, make up artists and stylists that would be there more as a friend than anything else. And so her assistant was yours for the week as well, and you would be lying if you said you weren't already having great fun just by being around her. Not to mention the excitement of being on the set itself and living the dream quiet literally already had you grinning the whole day long as you skipped around the place.

“Alright, is this good?” you asked, resting your chin on your palm, nearly kneeling down on the floor so that the dress looked more like a flower that had enveloped you whole. The maroon color only a great contrast against the white walls of the small room and the lights shining over your diamonds jewellery.

“That's perfect, yes!” she nearly squealed, snapping another photo that made you laugh “Alright, I'm pretty sure we've got more than plenty of photos and videos now. I'm gonna get out of your hair now and see what little I can post to tease the fans. Oh and Eric left the gloves on the chair in the corner. He said it would be best if you wore them because they wanted to run a few tests with cameras and see if they will keep them or not in the end.”

“Alright, Coco, don't worry. I've got this.” you nodded your head, already picking up the fabric and slipping it through your fingers “See you in a couple minutes!”

It wasn't long before you were left in your own devices by the assistant and a calm silence fell in the room. You looked at your reflection, fixing your gloves and dress you hummed the tune of the song.

Taking your phone you scrolled through your feed, one last time before you went to work, only to soon take notice of the photos that had already been uploaded by Coco and grinned widely when you saw that some of your friends had already commented, earning a soft laugh from you as you went through them. Most of them already knew about the filming you were doing for the song of the new Beauty and The Beast movie. You had been overly excited both about the opportunity to sing the song itself – alongside none other than John Legend at that – and even more film the music video. You were so thrilled even before you got started, there was no stopping you from telling your friends everything about it even before you got started.

After so many years in the music industry, so many worldwide tours and music videos and albums later, and more than just a few in the movie industry as well you had seen and experienced so many things and yet you still got so excited over the most simple projects. Much like this one, there was not a single thing you didn't look forward to. At first you were sure it was going to be in a unique location but it was a totally different thing getting to actually see it, especially when you realized that most of it was real and not just a green screen. So with a beautiful set, dressed quiet literally like a princess it was impossible for it all to not feel like a fairytale and have you enticed even before you got started.

“Disney princess or the new Queen of Asgard? Easily both!” Chris Hemsworth had commented.

“Could have not said it better, Chris! What would a King be without her Queen after all?” Tessa comments made you grin.

“Safe to say, running Marvel and Disney has never looked more classy!” it was one from RDJ.

“And then they said not to believe in fairytales. Looking stunning as ever! If you wanna switch up a Captain, I'm always available!” your friend's comment made you laugh and you made a mental note to reply to Brie the second you got the chance to.

“Alright, so what petition do I need to sign to have them make this a live-action Disney movie now?” Liz Olsen with a great variety of emojis.

You couldn't help your smile all the while you scrolled down the comments, seeing many more not just from costars, friends or other celebrities and plenty from fans; but it was all the while a bit too tight. It didn't reach your eyes, certainly not the more you looked and found no comment from your boyfriend. You knew you shouldn't hold it against him but part of you couldn't help but feel the first waves of sadness wash over your soul. Mainly because he was the one that knew most about this song and video clip, how nervous and excited you had been from the first moment; it felt like he had been with you the whole way through all of it and therefore you wanted him to see this too, even if it was only part of what was to come.

On one hand the fact that he was such a big Disney fan was no secret either and it had always made your eagerness to see his reaction to this grow even more. And on the other, loving the man so much meant that his compliments always held a different, much more big, significance to you. Maybe, you realised slowly as you dwelled on it more, it also had a lot to do with the way he said everything. There was always so much emotion in them, such great love and admiration and adoration and every other beautiful feeling he felt for you, showing through not only his words but also his eyes, expression and touches that after all these years you had learned to picture even when he was not close to you.

You decided not to think any more of it, realising that he surely had work to do and it would be better if you focused on it. The fact that you missed said man because you had not seen him in over week due to said work completely put aside.

Setting your phone aside you started making some final checks on your dress and looks, getting the feel of it as you signed softly to yourself “Tale as old as time. True as it can be. Barely even friends, than somebody bends-”

“Unexpectedly.” the singing was soft in your ear, the breath fanning over your cheek and bare neck before a pair of arms sneaked around your waist and a pair of lips were pressed on your neck, making shivers run down your entire spine with such intensity you couldn't hold back a gasp. When a squeeze came next you didn't even have the time react because his one hand slid up to your arm and rested on your shoulders, drawing the familiar goosebumps you had so missed the past couple days.

You would have leaned back into the firm broad chest, the action as natural as blinking. Every curve and edge of your body always seemed to fit perfectly with his no matter the position and you would be a big liar if you said your body was already reacting to his touch. Your heart with its unruly heartbeat – one that easily matched his – and your lungs refusing to take in a deep breath as the pleasant warmth spread through hands around you were easily a sign of who it was, every cell in your recognizing the contact.

Your eyes widened and your vision nearly blurred as you turned around to face the man you had not even realized was there but could recognize even with your eyes completely closed. “Chris?”

“Your highness.” his smile got even bigger when you turned to lock eyes with his and oh wasn't that a sight to make your entire day worth it, if anything making all of your worries and fears disappear. His eyes were so soft, filled with so much adoration and almost sparkling in a way you had not seen before.

You stared at him for what felt like an eternity, unable to believe he was there, looking at you so lovingly. His hands were cupping your face and only when you heard him whisper “Hello, my love.” did reality dawn on you. Realizing it wasn't a dream you almost squealed before you jumped in his arms, wrapping yours around his shoulders. Earning a deep chuckle that made his chest ramble, you couldn't hold your own laughter when you felt it against your own chest.

“Oh my gosh.” you choked out, eyes squeezed shut as you tried to force yourself not to cry “Chris.” you pulled just slightly away to look into his eyes, cupping his face in both your hands. Your eyes roamed over his face, taking everything in as it felt nearly impossible to believe this was happening. You leaned in to press your lips to his in an urgent kiss that still earned a soft laugh from him. You let out a soft breath when you pulled away and as you rested your forehead against his you repeated “Chris.” and he smiled even more widely “You're here. How?”

“Do you really question that? I would travel from the other side of the world for you.” and his smile turned into a small smirk “Isn't that what a prince always does?”

“Why-” your smile turned more into a smirk as you slowly started pulling away, despite the small sound of protest that came from his lips “I didn't know you were officially my prince charming. That is a title that must be earned, is it not?”

“And it would be my greatest honor to...” he started with a small smirk of his own which eventually faded much like his words as he fully took in the sight of you in the beautiful gown, with the jewelry and gloves adorning the whole look, you realised he was completely at a loss for words.

“Well, seeing as you didn't see the photos posted on instagram yet, I'll ask now: How do I look?” you probably already looked confident enough but that didn't mean you didn't want to hear his opinion more than anybody else's.

“Dear” his eyes were wide as he took everything in “Marry me already.”

And as you expected it wasn't he words, or at least not only the words, which made your heart leap to your throat. It was the pure love and awe that filled his eyes, his smile brighter than you had ever seen it. It was the way his voice became low, almost hoarse as if his throat closed from the overwhelming emotion in his chest. It was the way he reached out for you again and slowly traced his fingers over yoru cheek, touch light as a feather, as if he feared to break you. In his eyes you saw you were more than just a fragile porcelain doll, way more important and precious to him than anything actually.

“I'm fairly sure I wouldn't mind the idea, however, should you not do something heroic to say the least to earn that right? To have the hand of a princess and even more her heart, that requires more effort, don't you think?” you said with a smirk and he chuckled before straightening his back.

“Why, your highness, had I known you'd be so open to the idea I'd have brought the ring with me. It has been tucked in the back of my drawer for too long, I fear.” he said it so casually and truthfully, without a hint of pretend for the sake of the small momentary fairytale you were living through, that it made you pause for a second to hold your breath and blink at him.

Too caught up with your own thoughts you didn't even have the chance to question anything when he spoke again. A soft laugh escaped his lips as he slowly took both your hands in his, the act slipping for the moment, as he whispered again “My gosh, you look stunning. How did I ever get so lucky in my life?”

“It's no big deal.” you felt bashful all of a sudden and you were well aware it was because of the way your heart had sped up at the thought of said ring which he had joked about a long time ago but not in this way, not with such underlacedhonesty and seriousness.

“No big deal?” his eyebrows raised “I'm standing in front of the most beautiful disney princess to ever exist, both on the inside and on the outside. And on top of it all she is my girl and only mine. I'd say I don't deserve this kind of love but who am I to judge? My ideal fairytale I coming to life, this is too good to be true and yet it is. I'll take whatever you have to give me and offer everything I can in return. Who knows-” he pulled away, you not having realized when his forehead had come to rest against yours “Maybe I'll do a job good enough or the ring will be impressive enough to make at least a bit something like a prince charming.”

The wink he sent your way earned a laugh from your own lips, easing some of the tense feeling in your chest. You realised there was no reason to dwell on it or overstress it, not at the moment, so you let your smile become more easy if not more teasing “I'm sure you'd have plenty to offer, my kind sir. But first, if only in order for a proper courtship, you must have to catch me, don't you?”

“I must wha-” he started but all words died on his lips. You were sure he had already caught up somehow, the glint in his eyes telling you as much, but didn't give him the chance to fully question it before you were already pulling away from him and with a wink, opening the door and sprinting down the long hallway.

You heard the deep laugh, filling the entire hallway and with only the smallest glance over your shoulder you saw the man start to follow you fast enough. Grinning you picked up your dress and with that, picked up your pace so that you were running. As if the feeling of the dress bouncing around like a soft cloud, the air warm inside the building but present nonetheless - not only because of the running but also because of the studio you were fast approaching and that you remembered had more than a few doors and windows – wasn't enough to make you laugh, hearing your boyfriend's laughter as he tried to catch you get louder made you feel as if you were flying more than running.

“(Y/n)? What are you-”

You recognised the voice immediately but didn't have the time to reply let alone stop for even a second when you heard Chris get closer “Can't talk now Chrissy, I gotta go! Ah!” you actually yelped – or perhaps it was her, though the laughter that came next were surely hers when your boyfriend nearly bumped into John's wife and his apologies were the proof because you didn't turn to see – before you quickly run around a corner and down some stairs.

It wasn't even a couple seconds later that you found yourself running inside the studio itself, the cameras all around as the crew was setting everything up for the filming. You almost got so carried away by the entire place, many things having been added since the morning when you first showed up, and in the middle of admiring the realistic set of a castle they had managed to build. You were sure if you had not been in any hurry, you could have easily spent hours wanderingaround the place and admiring the detailed work, getting lost in a daydream much like a fairytale. But, again, you were in a hurry and as you felt the first fingers slip over your waist, aside from earning a small yelp from you they managed to get you moving again, or more specifically running.

“You have to be faster than that, darling.” you grinned, rounding the piano so that you were on the one side and he on the other.

“Who says I am being nearly half as fast as I can really be? Who says that if I really wanted to I wouldn't already have my hands on you?” he smirked, raising an eyebrow at you that made you giggle “I am merely being your perfect prince charming.”

“Alright, first; I like the sound of that but it's not going to make me give in just yet. And second; we both know that you're just being a sore loser here. You haven't caught me yet not because you can't. You're also a sore looser, not a prince charming, dear.”

He groaned, placing a hand over his chest “Another wound, all within the span of only a couple minutes. How do I survive this? Oh yes, in fairytales, a kiss always always does wonders, doesn't I? If only my princess would be kind enough to not run away from me anymore and instead save my life?”

You had to admit that although he was being both dramatic and cheeky, and you had to keep serious, you couldn't hold back your wide smile as you spoke “For starters, you will have to earn it. And-” you paused, jumping away as he made a move to run around the piano but you were fast to get away so that you had now swapped places “If I may ask, what's the first one?”

“Wouldn't you know? As if you can't see my bleeding heart which has been struck worse today at seeing you like this. But-” another jump that got him dangerously close “I suppose if I can't get a kiss, I will make it my last wish that you wear a similar dress soon.” his words made you frown until he added “Only in total white. And really, the soonest possible so we should probably start making a guests list.”

“Chris” you caught yourself pausing, longer than expected and than should be right in this case but you felt like you had no control of your body at the moment “This is not a funny joke anymore.”

“Who said it was one in the first place?” he asked, and you could swear you heard Chrissy and John gasp softly in the background. At some point you had even seen them but now your entire mind was blank. You focused on Chris, his voice much softer than before, his posture having relaxed as if to let you know he wasn't playing any game of sorts “And maybe-” he took a slow tentative step towards you, eyes on you to judge your reaction all the time. When he saw you didn't move away from him, he took more steps closer to you “If you'd let me, I could show you real soon that I was serious from the first moment.”

“Wha-” but you stopped yourself because you knew that wasn't the answer you wanted so bad to ask, it wasn't the one your heart longed for to be answered so instead you whispered “How?”

Chris leaned in to press a kiss on your forehead, extending a hand which you took before he said another hing “First, I believe it's best if you get to job as fast as possible. And for that to happen, it would be right of me to stop playing around. So, what do you say we start things the way only in fairytales they do: a dance?”

“It doesn't necessarily happen in this order but-” you smiled, glancing over his shoulder to see John and his wife do the same, the music having only second now starting to play “I think we've already found the perfect song, so why not?”

“Think of it... as practice.”

[riotwritesthings]

The Curious Witch and the Cursed Wolf

Chapter 4: A Choice and A Chance | AO3

And this is the end! Art as always by the fantabulous @gayspacesprinkles​. ILYBRO.

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3

Next week, my other specialty. Filth.

Title: The Curious Witch and the Cursed Wolf (Chapter 4) Collaborator(s): Riot @buckybarnesbingo​ Square Filled: C1, “kiss me” @starkbucksbingo​ Square Filled: B2, Chosen family Ship/Main Pairing: WinterIron Rating: T Major Tags/Warnings: fantasy AU, witch!Tony, wolf!Bucky, fairytale vibes, Non-graphic injury Summary: Once upon a time there was a man, and a wolf. They both went into the forest looking for different things, and instead they found each other. Word Count: 2,181

~~~

Once upon a time there was a wolf.

He never would have thought he’d find himself traveling with a witch, but it was the happiest he could ever remember being.

He still didn’t know who he used to be, where he came from, but with every day he cared less.

The wolf no longer longed for a home he couldn’t remember, content to follow the witch through the forest, wherever he led.

He watched the witch study plants and strange stones, watched him interact with the people and other strange things they met among the trees.

Always so eager to learn, to help.

The wolf had never met anyone like him.

~~~

“Have we passed that tree before?” Tony asks, adorable wrinkle between his eyebrows. “I thought you said you have a good sense of direction.”

I do, Bucky thinks and huffs as he nudges Tony in the thigh with his shoulder, grinning when Tony squawks and pretends to trip over him. The forest is circular.

“That’s awful,” Tony says gleefully. “I love it. How does that even work?”

He spends the next half a day trying to guess and Bucky doesn’t even understand half the words he uses. He could happily listen to Tony talk all day, could listen to it forever.

“What do you think, magic vortex or temporal wormhole?” Tony asks eventually, grinning at him, wide and bright.

Changed my mind, I think you jus’ got us lost, Bucky thinks and then barks out a laugh when Tony tries to shove at him, dodging easily out the way.

“I’m going to turn you into a rug,” Tony grumbles.

Bucky snaps his teeth and Tony just laughs, and Bucky can’t stop his tail from wagging even as he growls louder.

“You haven’t died yet?” Comes a voice from up above them, hidden among the thick leaves, and Bucky rolls his eyes as Tony’s face lights up.

“It’s you again!” Tony says happily, head craned way back to stare up into the trees. “Why don’t you come down here?”

“Not until he stops making that sound,” the voice says, and Bucky catches a glimpse of soft blue light between the shifting branches.

He growls louder.

“That’s his happy noise!” Tony calls helpfully and Bucky loses his growl in another huff of laughter.

Pepper is grumbling to herself as she slowly floats down towards them, pointedly much closer to Tony. Bucky gives her a toothy grin.

“So, what, he just likes being cursed?” Pepper as she bobs around Tony’s head, making a thoughtful sound when Tony swats at her. “I can actually see that, probably useful to be a wolf in a forest.”

Pretty useful, Bucky admits, because it is, more than once he’s had to get between Tony and the things they meet. Things with fangs and claws.

Tony is too curious for his own good, but Bucky has sharper claws, bigger fangs. He will do anything for Tony, and by now everything in the forest should know it.

"Wait, is it— do you know how to break the curse?" Tony asks, face lighting up the way it always does at the prospect of learning something new

"I'm not the one who's a witch," Pepper, as if the answer should be obvious.

“Can I break it?” Tony asks, and Bucky’s heart jumps in his chest.

He hadn’t even thought—

Pepper sighs, impressively loud for such a tiny thing.

“Probably,” she says and her wings flutter, as if shrugging. “You won’t know unless you try, that’s been your method so far, right?”

“Aw, you’ve been watching,” Tony says, fluttering his long eyelashes, and Bucky laughs again.

“Maybe,” Pepepr says with another tiny shrug but floats a little closer, glows a little brighter. “You’re more interesting can carrying gossip for lazy old witches.”

“A ringing endorsement,” Tony says, nodding, then grins when the glowing light lets out a delicate laugh and swoops down to bounce off the top of his head.

“So you’ve almost made it out of the forest now,” Pepper says and she’s addressing them both now. “Did you find what you were looking for?”

“No,” Tony says, but he’s smiling widely and Bucky can hear the warm, happy thump of his heart. “And also very much yes.”

Better, Bucky thinks smugly.

He hadn’t come into the forest looking for anything except to survive, never could have expected Tony.

“I’m glad,” Pepper says, like she really means it. “Maybe I’ll see you around.”

“You should take a vacation sometime,” Tony says with a teasing grin. “I really do have a million more questions.”

An’ I could use a good snack, Bucky adds, flashing his teeth.

Pepper huffs again, bounces off Bucky’s head too before disappearing into the thick trees.

“I like her,” Tony says decisively.

You like anyone who gives you shit, Bucky thinks fondly.

Tony gasps, clutches his hands over the glow in his chest, and Bucky barks out another laugh.

“I’ll show you,” Tony grumbles, chases him through the trees when Bucky turns and bounds away, breathless and laughing.

They stop for the night when the trees start to thin, starlight peaking between the shifting leaves.

Bucky has barely stretched himself out and lain down before Tony is curling in against his side, so small when Bucky is at his largest and still so unafraid.

He flicks his tail up over Tony’s lap and chest even though the nights are warmer now. It’s habit, and he likes to feel the steady rise and fall of Tony’s chest.

Tony runs his fingers through Bucky’s fur, smoothing tangles and pulling loose twigs and leaves.

“Would you want to be human, if- if I even can break the curse?” Tony asks, his voice so soft and his eyes fixed on his hands. “You could... find a new home. Make a new life. If you want.”

Bucky whines, presses his nose to the curve of Tony’s neck. He can hear the rapid thump of Tony’s heart, the catch of his breathing.

Want to stay with you, Bucky thinks, with all the feeling he can possibly put into it. Any size, any shape.

Tony’s heartbeat jumps and his chest glows warm and bright.

“Okay, okay that’s- good,” Tony says and Bucky can hear his smile.

He falls asleep quickly, head tipped back against Bucky’s ribs and snoring softly. Bucky curls around him a little tighter, thinks about being human.

Bucky falls asleep more slowly, dreams of being able to hold Tony’s hands in his own.

~~~

Once upon a time there was a man.

He left home looking for somewhere to belong. Instead, he found someone to belong with.

It was so much better than he could have imagined.

He went looking for a way to help, a way to make life better, and he found magic.

The people of his village had told him he wouldn’t find anything, insisted it as he’d packed up to leave, and he proved them wrong.

He couldn’t wait to show them what he could do, how much he could help. So many of his wonderful ideas he could finally bring to life without worrying about materials.

So many more places he could see.

And someone to see them with.

~~~

Where will you go, after the forest? Bucky asks as morning sunlight pours through the leaves, emerald bright. Back to your village?

Tony continues scratching behind Bucky’s ears as he thinks about the question, still sprawled across Bucky’s back, warm and half asleep.

“To start,” he says. “Are you- you’re coming with me, right?”

Bucky hesitates, and Tony’s heart sinks a little in his chest.

The hunters, the other witches, they’ll still be lookin’ for me, Bucky says slowly, ears drooping. They won’t follow me into th’ forest, but if I leave...

Tony wiggles his way down off Bucky’s back, slides around to sit in front of him. Takes Bucky’s giant head between his palms.

“I won’t let them get to you,” Tony says and he’s never meant anything more, looks Bucky right in his sad, stormy eyes so he’ll know it. “You protected me in the forest, and I’ll protect you out of the forest.”

Still gonna protect you, Bucky says with a huff but his eyes are lighter, like sunlight beginning to break through storm clouds.

“Yeah yeah,” Tony says with a wide smile and leans in to press his forehead to Bucky’s. “So we’ll just have to protect each other, how does that sound?”

He can feel it when Bucky drags in a deep breath, lets it out slowly. The forest is alive around them, loud with the rustle of wind and creatures through the trees and bushes.

Tony’s world stands still.

I want to break the curse, Bucky finally says, low and sure. An’ I want to stay with you.

Tony sits upright again, chewing on his lip.

“I, I can try, I just...“ Tony trails off for a moment, ducking his chin. “I don’t want to mess it up, if I hurt you—“

You won’t, Bucky says, like he knows it, like he doesn’t have a doubt. I trust you.

Tony can’t breathe for a second, can only nod. No one has ever said that to him before, no one else has ever wanted his help.

Just try, Bucky says, bumping his head against Tony’s chest and giving him a toothy smile.

“Okay,” Tony says, smiling back helplessly. “Okay.”

So he scoots back in the dirt, closes his eyes and holds up his hands, and tries.

The forest falls still and silent, even the wind dying away.

Bright light fills the small clearing, bright enough that Tony can see it through his eyelids, and then vanishes. Tony opens his eyes to a giant puff of smoke where Bucky should be, and his heart is in his throat.

The wind picks up again, motion returning to the trees, and the cloud of smoke slowly clears away.

“You did it!” Bucky cries, then smirks with lots of teeth. “Was kinda hopin’ you’d have to kiss me, though.”

His voice is still low and warm and now real, eyes still stormy blue and so familiar.

He’s also very naked, all pale skin and thick muscle, not a hint of shame.

“Clothes!!” Tony squeaks, slapping his hands over his face. Even if he can’t help peeking between his fingers, just a little. “I didn’t know I needed to include clothes!”

“Clothes,” Bucky repeats with a scoff and he doesn’t seem concerned, too busy dropping to his knees and laughing, tugging gently at Tony’s elbow.

“Humans wear clothes, that’s the deal,” Tony says and keeps his hands planted firmly over his eyes, face burning with the force of his blush.

“‘M gonna kiss you now,” Bucky says, very politely. “Please move your hands.”

“You need pants!!” Tony insists as he peeks between his fingers again.

“Can’t believe you think that’s more important right now,” Bucky says with a pout, crossing his arm over his chest. The fluffy ears still on top of his head droop a little.

Tony isn’t sure if he’s just bad at breaking curses, or if Bucky had been under the curse too long. He supposes it doesn’t matter, Bucky certainly doesn’t seem bothered.

“I’m putting pants on you!” Tony declares, because that is what’s important right now. He’s a little lightheaded with all the heat gathering in his cheeks.

Bucky yelps a little in surprise when the pants appear on him, then quickly returns to tugging Tony’s hands away from his face.

Tony lets his arms fall but Bucky catches one of them by the wrist, gently and carefully winds their fingers together, clutches him tightly.

When he looks up Bucky’s eyes are lighter than Tony has ever seen them, practically glowing. His smile is wide, a little awed, and full of sharp teeth.

Tony smiles back, gives his hand a little tug.

“Now kiss me, what are you waiting for?” Tony demands petulantly.

Bucky laughs, and then he does.

~~~

They walk out of the forest, hand in hand, and the world opens up huge around them.

Tony barely recognizes the inn, with its fresh coat of paint and flowering shrubs. The windows stream light and music onto the grass, a dozen raucous voices floating in the dusk.

It feels like forever since Tony was last here, since he walked into the trees alone.

The old man waves from the back door, doesn’t look surprised to see him at all.

Tony waves back with a wide grin, and the old man laughs loud and booming, turns to return to the kitchen.

“So, back to my village?” Tony asks as he turns to Bucky, that tiny pit of fear still in his stomach. Still a tiny bit unsure.

“Wherever you want,” Bucky says, like a promise, giving Tony’s hand a squeeze.

“And then wherever you want,” Tony insists. “Anywhere you want, that’s only fair.”

Bucky blinks at him, and then smiles.

“That’s fair,” Bucky repeats and pulls him in.

Once upon a time there was a wolf, and a man.

And they lived happily ever after.

[moonlit-han]

sometimes, wishes don’t come true ↠ huang renjun

genre: angst word count: 1.7k warnings: angst, breakup, swearing request: yes (anon. prompt: “Don’t lie to me.”) a/n: to the anon who said they needed some angst: i hope this suffices~

✧ masterlist & tag list info in bio ✧

↠↞

You sighed, resting your cheek against the cool tile of your bathroom wall. A shiver passed over you, and you hugged your knees closer to your chest. Your eyes felt dry and itchy from crying—even your throat was sore from holding back screams.

You should have known this was going to happen.

All the signs were there, after all. For years, you’d wished that you and Renjun could be more than just best friends, that you could date. You’d wanted it so fucking much that your desire consumed you, making it nearly impossible for you to feel anything else. At times, you felt like you were watching a different version of yourself walking around and talking with Renjun—a version that was entirely a lie. You had to be so careful not to let something slip about how you felt or else you were sure everything would fall apart. Worst of all, you’d thought he only loved you like a best friend or a sister for years; you just never saw the signs that it might be anything more.

When Renjun confessed to you, you were laying side-by-side on the grass of your high school’s baseball field. He’d insisted on taking your stargazing. He reached out and took your hand, placing it on his heart, and while holding hands was nothing new, you felt his heartbeat racing under the thin cotton of his t-shirt. Renjun had sounded so scared when he said he was in love with you, that you immediately rolled over and kissed him full on the mouth. Suffice to say, he was surprised but absolutely thrilled.

That had been the happiest day of your life. It was as if everything had fallen into place, all the stars had aligned, and the calamities of the world had been solved.

Renjun was the perfect boyfriend.

Since you’d been best friends your whole life, you didn’t have to worry about getting to know each other from the start. It was almost too easy to be a couple. Your dates were a lot like just hanging out, but with more casual touches and so, so many more kisses. Kissing Renjun was like the feeling you get on the first true day of spring when the sun is hot on your skin, like that first delicious bite of decadent chocolate cake, like falling asleep to the soft sound of rain. You could spend hours just kissing and never get bored.

The strangest part of actually dating was when you were intimate. You’d swum with Renjun more times than you could count, had definitely changed in front of each other, and you were pretty sure you’d seen everything he had. Well, almost everything. And then, you had seen, felt, and tasted everything that was Huang Renjun. But him bare before you felt almost wrong, like you were too close to knowing his soul. But, maybe that was just because this was the last thing between you and you nearly knew his soul anyway. Even with the strangeness, everything was perfect.

You should have listened to the stories in the books you grew up reading. Be careful what you wish for. Look for the worm at the heart of the perfect apple. Everything comes with a price.

Eleven months passed in bliss with Renjun before things began to change. You’d both started your third year of college and were busier than you’d ever imagined you could be. The time you spent together dwindled until you only saw each other two or three times a week instead of multiple times every day. Communication became almost strained, with you calling and messaging Renjun more than he ever did you.

But, you were still in love.

One day, Renjun seemed to disappear. You couldn’t get in touch with him no matter how hard you tried, and his friends wouldn’t give you a straight answer. As the sun set, you found yourself growing angrier and angrier at your boyfriend. Leaving you with no notion of where he was or what he was doing? Did he not know how much you’d worry? You didn’t have to spend every waking moment with him—in fact, you preferred if you didn’t—but at least knowing he was okay would be nice.

More than nice. Necessary.

Renjun was back the next day as if nothing had happened. He showered you with the usual affection, promising to take you out for a fantastic date that weekend.

When you asked where he’d been the day before, all he could say was “Around. I just needed a day to myself. Stop bothering me, Y/N.”

No matter how many times you asked, no matter how nicely you said you loved him, he wouldn’t say more. Two hours later, you were just as frustrated.

“Renjun, I’m gonna go home,” you grumbled, gathering your things. Renjun just continued reading silently. “If you ever decide that you’re going to tell me where the hell you were yesterday and why you’re now ignoring me, let me know. Until then, I’ll be at home, probably binge-watching a show.”

“No, don’t watch our show!” Renjun said, finally looking up.

“Really?” you demanded. “That’s all you have to say right now?”

“What . . .”

“I’m going home. Call me tomorrow so we can talk.” You firmly closed the door to his apartment behind you, relishing the satisfying thunk the wood made.

When you got home, you practically ran to the bathroom to strip off your clothes and hurl yourself into the shower. The heat of the water always helped calm you. After what was probably too long in the shower, you put on your cat onesie and crawled into bed with your laptop. Just to spite Renjun, you watched a full two seasons of the show the two of you had been watching together. You didn’t care what he thought.

As you’d hoped, you and Renjun made up the next day and he did take you on that fantastic date. He’d said that he truly had just spent the day by himself—he’d gone on a hike in the nature preserve nearby, and even had pictures as proof. Although, to your slightly suspicious mind, they could’ve been taken anywhere. But, you had to think the best of your boyfriend, had to trust him.

Three weeks later, you couldn’t have guessed when you woke up that morning that it would be the last time you would ever say “I love you” to Huang Renjun.

It was the day after your one-year anniversary, and Renjun showed up at your door looking utterly bedraggled. He hadn’t even hugged or kissed you when you let him in, just shoved by you into the living room. Frowning, you walked into the room to see Renjun pacing back and forth along the length of your sofa.

“Ren, what’s wrong?” you asked, reaching out to touch his arm. Renjun flinched away, and you withdrew your hand to cross your arms as you stood in front of him. He didn’t answer.

“Renjun,” you tried again, trying to keep weeks of frustration and confusion out of your voice, “babe, just tell me what’s wrong and I’ll help or do anything I can! I love you. I hate seeing you like this. What happened? Please, just tell me.”

Renjun was silent for what seemed like a hundred years, finally coming to a stop so that the two of you were directly facing each other over the coffee table.

“You really want to know, Y/N? Do you really?” he spat. You’d never heard Renjun sound like this before: angry, despairing, and like he was at the end of his tether.

“Yes! Just tell me and then maybe we can fix it or I can help or something!”

Renjun let out a laugh that was mostly a sneer, and leaned across the intervening space between you. You had to stop yourself from stepping backward.

“I don’t love you anymore,” he said with deliberate care, the words coming out of his mouth like bullets fired at close range. “There. You asked what was wrong and I told you. I don’t love you anymore and haven’t for weeks.”

You felt hot tears begin to slide down your face as you stared numbly back at him. Didn’t love— No. No, no, no. NO!

“I don’t believe you,” you said, your voice barely audible but you knew your fury could be heard nonetheless. “You fucking bastard. I can’t believe it. What happened?” Your voice rose as you lost your grip on your anger. “Did you find someone else? Don’t lie to me. What the hell happened? Did I get boring? Could you just not take it anymore? What the fuck, Renjun?!”

He just stood there as you yelled. He didn’t try to defend himself, didn’t try to make excuses. Once you’d called him every name you could think of, Renjun raised his eyebrows.

“Are you done?” he said sardonically.

You spluttered.

Renjun rolled his eyes. “No, I didn’t find someone else. I just realized that I don’t love you anymore. We should’ve never tried to date, Y/N. It was a doomed relationship from the start.” Renjun tiredly ran a hand through his hair.

“I— Things were so good,” you said, sniffling. “How could you think it was doomed?”

“Grow up, Y/N. Not everything’s a fucking fairytale. Sometimes you don’t get everything you want and thinking otherwise just going to see you get hurt even more.” He huffed. “I can’t do this. Goodbye, Y/N.”

With that, he turned around and walked out your door.

So now here you were, curled up on your bathroom floor. You’d been sobbing for hours, feeling like your still-beating heart had been cut out of your chest with red-hot razors. Your head pounded from lack of air and water, and too much pressure from crying. All you wanted was to sleep but you couldn’t stop thinking about Renjun. He was your best friend and the love of your life. You’d talked to him nearly every day of your life since the time you were eight.

And now, he was just gone.

Completely gone.

You didn’t know if you’d ever see him again.

You felt utterly empty and alone, like an unmoored ship drifting out to sea. The world had lost its center.

You should have listened to the stories: Be careful what you wish for.