#think I’m gonna leave all the prints up until like the night before I move

[lesbiansanemi]

Mmmmm plans for today go to therapy, go to library so I can return the things I’ve borrowed and chill for a while there and work on wind blown lilies, pick up a couple things from the grocery store on the way home, then pack up the rest of my things except for kitchen bare essentials, enough clothes for the week, and my prints

[sc0tters]

Out of It | Mat Barzal

summary: as your relationship with Tito finally hits a breaking point, what happens when Mat is there to pick up your pieces?

request: yes/no

warnings: cheating, failed relationship, drinking, allusions to sex, swearing.

word count: 3.2k

authors note: Kei said I could use the chaotic ending so I did, probably means we’re gonna have to have a part 2 (let me know if you want it). Request said something sad for Tito but happy for Mat and this is what my mind came up with. I actually enjoyed writing this one a lot so I hope you all enjoy reading it! But also don’t cheat on your partners, that’s very fucked up!

part two | part three

Things hadn’t been good for months.

When Anthony was first traded to the Canucks your boyfriend of three years always just assumed that you would join him. But you didn’t, your entire working career was spent in New York building up the your name and you weren’t ready to leave it for some city in Vancouver without the guarantee of a job waiting for you.

That seemed to be the first sign that things were changing as the boy took it as you not loving him.

Tito slammed his hands against your kitchen counter “do you ever support me in this move?” The man groaned in frustration making you taken aback by his outburst.

The accusation hurt you “of course I do.” You yelled back making his irritated tone “the fact that you think I’m gonna pack my life up at the drop of a hat makes me question how you feel about me though.” You crossed your arms sending him a glare.

This argument had gone on for the last fifteen minutes and there was still no clear sign of the end of this argument “look I can’t live in Vancouver but I can split my time between the two cities.” You offered growing tired of the way this was continuing to drag on.

But Anthony didn’t like that offer, in fact that almost felt worse than you just staying in New York “don’t bother.” He sighed pushing past you.

The hockey player moved towards the door “where are you going?” You croaked feeling your throat grow tight “I’ll spend the night with Mat.” Anthony sighed grabbing his shoes from the rack.

Your feet pulled you to the door “we don’t go to bed angry,” you reminded him “you promise.” Tears began rolling down your cheeks as you felt like you were loosing the love of your life “I’ll be back in the morning.” The boy mumbled kissing your forehead.

His lips left their print on your skin before he walked out of the apartment leaving you alone.

You two never actually spoke about that argument again, instead just choosing to ignore the fact that for the first time since you two moved in together Anthony didn’t sleep at home when he was in New York.

It felt like it was meant to be the one anomaly in your relationship or at least until February hit. Valentine’s Day you were meant to be in Vancouver with flights booked and everything but when a last minute meeting came up you had to pull out. Much to the annoyance of Anthony though.

Thinking you were doing the right thing you told him to go enjoy the dinner reservations he made. But after your long day of work when you came home the last thing you expected to see was the rumour mill that twitter made talking about how Anthony had a new girlfriend.

She was taller than you and looked like a blonde supermodel. Through frustration you grumbled something to yourself before you dialled in your boyfriends number “hey y/n!” Anthony was always good about picking up on the first or second ring “yeah I’ll be done in a sec,” he added clearly talking to someone on his side of the call.

You never liked admitting that you felt insecure in your relationship, but how could you not when you were with some hotshot hockey player? It also wasn’t helped by the fact that he lived 3 hours behind you and in a different country “don’t tell me she’s there,” you choked on the words as tears formed in your eyes.

Anthony clicked his tongue hearing the soft whimper you let out “who baby?” His nickname always had you melting into his hand but now you felt repulsed by it “that girl-“ your eyebrows knitted together as you thought the boy was playing tricks on you acting all oblivious.

The hockey player cut you off “told you that Twitter isn’t good for you.” His reminder felt condescending as you sat down feeing like you were having his lecture in person “why are they all talking about it?” Your voice was soft as you wiped your cheek with the back of your hand to clean the tears away from you.

He almost forgot he was on the phone to you as he stared at the girl who was on his couch pointing at her watch to signal that they were late “when she realised that we both had no plans tonight I said she should come with me.” Tito explained leaving you silent as he wasn’t denying that he spent the night with this bombshell of a girl “she’s just a friend though baby you got nothing to worry about.” Somehow his attempt to comfort you only made your nerves stick out more.

You tried to formulate a coherent sentence as you felt stupid for getting all upset “look I’ve got a few days off next week, why don’t I come see you?” He proposed causing that stupid love drunk smile to form on your face “I’d like that a lot.” You nodded missing your boyfriend now more than ever.

From the moment he arrived in New York you two could feel that something was different. As you invited some of his favourite old teammates over for dinner you felt relieved that you weren’t having to spend the night alone with him.

But of course that sense of peace had to be disturbed “baby why don’t you leave those for the morning?” You asked seeing Anthony’s back towards you as you entered the kitchen.

If there was one thing that usually fixed your problems it was sex. Sure that sounded stupid and like you were both teenagers, but as a couple your favourite way to end even the smallest of fights as with sex.

Which is why you thought it was the fix this problem needed “I want to wake up to a clean kitchen.” The Canadian always felt this rewarding feeling whenever he got to see an empty set of sinks in the morning.

You decided to try a little harder as you walked over to him “think I’ve got something a little more fun for you to do before that though.” You mumbled letting your hands slide up the front of his shirt.

That only seemed to piss him off “Jesus y/n let me finish the fucking-” the moment he began lashing out you stepped back keeping your lips shut until he spun around to look at you.

It didn’t take his eyes long to make their way down your body as you tied the string around your robe up clearly deciding that it wasn’t right for tonight “oh,” Anthony’s voice was soft as he realised that you were wearing his favourite lingerie.

The set was something you bought when he was on a long road trip once and you sent him pictures of each set you tried on in the store and when he picked the blue set you went to the airport to pick him up in a coat with nothing on underneath besides for that new set “forget it.” You rolled your eyes now feeling embarrassed as you turned around heading back to your bedroom where you sat on your bed for fifteen minutes waiting for him to come after you.

But he never did and you felt like an idiot.

April came around and you were now onto month four of feeling like something was wrong but you never felt confident enough to talk to Anthony about it so instead you let your relationship get to the worst it had ever been. Excuses were made each time one of you was meant to see the other and as the time between phone calls grew, the amount of fight you put up to see the other person decreased.

Tonight you were going out with some of the guys from the Islanders team. Mat invited you along as they were celebrating their place in the playoff “I know they are your friends.” You rolled your eyes at the phone call as Anthony couldn’t understand how his best friend invited you along.

It was somewhat amusing because Mat was the one who introduced you to your boyfriend “I’m going to support the boys okay?” You heard a knock at the door making you open it.

A smile formed on your face seeing older Canadian as you ushered him inside motioning to him to keep quiet as you were on the phone “yes I’ll let you know when I’m home.” It sounded like you were talking to a parent rather than your boyfriend.

Mat made himself comfortable on your couch as his spread his legs leaning into the soft fabric “I’m going to go now.” And with that you hung up. It irritated you how the first time he called you in over a month was because one of his old teammates mentioned that he was seeing you tonight “you okay kid?” Mat asked furrowing his eyebrows.

Despite the fact that there was only a two year age gap between you both when he met you, you were a freshman in college in your Maple Leafs jersey as you willingly spent your morning in a cafe arguing with the Islander player about how the Canadian team was better. Mat would never admit this to you or Anthony but he thought you were hot, that’s why he invited you to the game when the Maple Leafs came to visit. Why he scored a goal and pointed right up to the box where you sat, but even more so why he scored three goals. But no matter how hard Mat tried to impress you, it was no match against Anthony’s soft smile that he sent you making you weak in the knees.

You sighed sitting next to him “Tito is mad at me again.” You mumbled fiddling with the bracelet that the older boy gave you for your twenty first, the piece of jewellery that you now never take off.

Mat slipped his hand onto your knee giving it a squeeze “don’t worry about him.” The Canadian wanted to act like his crush on you had diminished over the years but when you called him in tears because you realised that you were drowning your sorrows in too much Chinese food for one person to ear during Anthony’s first night in Vancouver. The speed Mat drove across the city going through each red light told him otherwise.

Having him around always comforted you “think I just need to let loose tonight.” You mumbled running your hand through your hair pushing it back unintentionally revealing your collar bones that were highlighted by the low cut of your dress “finally give you a reason to keep up with me.” Mat always drank faster than you as you wrote it down to his lack of a college career where he never got the chance to grow out of it.

You rolled your eyes letting out a laugh “think you’ll be keeping up with me tonight.” You mumbled looking down at your phone to see the time “we’re late,” you groaned quickly getting up. Mat followed your actions with a smile “only means we have to make up for the lost time.” He pointed out making you laugh.

Oh how pretty that sound was.

The bar was packed full of players and their partners with you being the only plus one without a romantic connection to the team. You had practically drunk your way through the bar as the wags believed that you were making up for lost time after you turned down each of their offers to join them on girls night since Anthony left. It was stupid sure, but you always felt out of place when you were with them, so you thought that you’d feel worse without your boyfriend there.

But instead you surprisingly felt like you fitted in as Mat’s arm snaked around your waist “you want another one?” He asked motioning to your empty glass.

The girls had smirks on their faces as they watched your cheeks turn pink feeling his breath on your neck “I’ll come!” You blurted out making them bite the inside of their cheeks to hold in the giggles.

Whilst everyone thought you would marry Anthony, it made all of the girls happy to see you smile and until you or Mat did anything that crossed a line. They didn’t see the point in telling Anthony that his friend was taking care of his girlfriend.

Because to them everything that Mat and you did was friendly, the touches, the smiles, the looks. But what none of them knew was how each of your heart rates increased at the mere thought of the other. Mat locked his hand into yours as he pulled you through the crowd “two refills please.” He asked the bartender with his signature smile.

When the hockey player turned to you he realised you had been staring “what are you thinking about kid?” Mat’s voice was soft as he sat you in the barstool in front of him “how bad would it be if we left?” You cocked your head staring at his Hazel orbs that seemed to be locked into your soul.

Your question made Mat laugh “you had enough?” He frowned wanting to have more of your company for longer. You were quick to shake your head “no of course not,” your cheeks turned pink as you panicked “I just want ice cream and some vodka right now.” The pairing was weird but it seemed to be the only thing going through your mind “well it’s a good thing that I have both of those in my apartment then isn’t it?” His comment made your eyes light up with excitement.

Without thinking he held his hand out to you “they’re all so drunk I don’t think they’ll notice us leave.” Mat mumbled causing you to nod as he pulled you out of the bar somehow without anyone noticing.

During the drive back to his you remained fairly quiet as the Uber driver continued to talk to Mat about what it was like being a hockey player “I’m telling you I think he loves you.” You got the words out between your fit of giggles.

Mat groaned shaking his head “was nervous to have such a pretty girl in his car.” The boy shot back shoving his spoon back into the Häagen-Dazs ice cream container as he ignored the workout he was going to have to do tomorrow.

His compliment made your stomach do flips “think he’d be more affected by you,” you shook your head taking a sip of the expensive vodka that he had given you to drink “if he was gay-“ before you could swallow you let out a laugh resulting in a cough from you.

The hockey player grew alarmed watching your face turn red “you okay?” All you could do was nod until your throat calmed down “you care about me.” You teased rubbing your elbow with his as you smiled.

As much as Mat tried to ignore how he felt about you it was no longer working “of course I do.” The Canadian wanted to scoff that you would ever even consider to think that he didn’t.

But what he didn’t expect as your eyes locked with his was that you would lean forward to kiss him. At first Mat melted into the kiss as this was something he always wanted but as you moved to his lap he was reminded of the fact that you weren’t his “what about Tito?” Mat gasped forcing himself to feel guilty about the situation. Your lips formed a frown “he doesn’t love me anymore Mat,” you shook your head as tears formed in your eyes “and I don’t love him.” It was the first time you had ever actually said that out loud.

Yet it was all true, the fire that was once burning underneath your relationship turned to an occasional spark that had gone into hiding for the last few months. Mat stared at your soft facial expression “why don’t you leave him?” He asked furrowing his brows “don’t want to be alone.” Your confession made you seem week.

Truthfully though you had grown used to Anthony’s company and you were scared to see if you could survive without a boyfriend in your life “you aren’t alone.” Mat sighed tracing his finger along your jaw letting his thumb settle on your lip.

Maybe it was the alcohol talking but if he showed you that he was here for you then maybe you’d leave Anthony for good “prove it to me then baby.” You pushed your lips back into his as the boy walked the two of you to his room letting your body hit his mattress.

Mat was finally going to have his way with you.

The next morning.

You let out a groan as you heard a loud knock at the door “baby go get it,” you grumbled wanting to go back to sleep “fine.” Hearing Mats voice from beside you had the events of last night quickly falling back into your head.

Somehow though the boy seemed calmer about it all as he sent you a smile “could get used to this.” You were wearing one of his old Islanders shirts, the first time you were wearing a piece of merch from the team that wasn’t from Anthony.

It reminded you of the fact that you still had a boyfriend but here you were in his best friends bed covered in hickies whilst he was covered in scratches “you should answer the door.” You pushed your hair out of your face as you began to feel sick. You weren’t upset about last night, you loved the reminder of feeling what it was like to be loved.

To put it simply you felt bad that you had done it to a guy like Anthony, your mother raised you better than that “I’ll send them on their way and then we can talk about last night.” Mat wasn’t an idiot, he could see that you weren’t thinking about Anthony by the way you stared at the promise ring on your finger that he gave you when he came back in February.

It only took you two months to go ahead and fuck that one up “okay,” you nodded biting the inside of your cheek as you struggled to comprehend how you would talk to Anthony after this.

Your stomach did flips as you stared at yourself in Mats bedroom mirror. In that moment you felt like a horrible person and there was honestly no denying that you were one. Your precious Anthony would never cross a line like the one that you had and you only hoped that you had enough time to fix it before everything was thrown back in your face “what took you so long dude?”

That voice sent a chill down your spine as your eyes went wide with any desire of wanting extra sleep quickly being thrown out of the window.

What the fuck was Anthony doing at Mat’s door?

[kel-lance]

JJK Mafia Au (JJK x Reader) PART 2

Part 1

Warnings:- TW: Dead dove dont read (DDDR) Minors do not interact (MDNI): SA, Physical Assault, DubCon, NonCon, Mindbreak, Public Humiliation, Breeding, Ownership, Gaslighting, Multiple manipulation, RWORD, PTSD, a lot more toxic sh.

Premise: Reader lives in a city where the two biggest gangs keep things line until the third gang showed up. That had nothing to do with you though, until dumb luck just happened to favor you one day. Basically You’re picked up and used by every dangerous criminal within the clans due to some alliances they had to create due to some members messing up the previous alliances. ((Almost everyone’s gonna have a turn 🤗)) ( i have 11 more chapters planned out right now meaning after i write those ill still be writing more.)

“We’re done for today.” The large man reaches for his robes. You don’t bother to move. Just breathing hurt. It was his off day and he was deciding to break you in, deciding to keep you for however long you were durable. He was amused with your reactions. He liked it. He found it interesting how you were also trying to survive. He’d play along as your god now. 

You lay in the bed and his finger prints stained your skin, each strike created blots of purple and blue and green. You liked bruises before, it showed how you fought for it. 

You apparently woke up two days later, and he lets you rest. Your body finally turns off survival mode for a second, just a second to adjust to the warm room. Four walls, the nice smell, it was just another thing you weren’t used to. Stillness. It was boring. But under these circumstances you were glad to have your own padded room to deal with this.

The time you were left alone, you didn’t know how long that would be. Another hour or so you’d think he’d come back in, hearing as you’re up. Time for more torture, though do torture victims get a bed and tended to? It felt more like you were a sacrifice, meant to appease him, though no one handed you over. 

You were brushed, scrubbed raw, and even felt a bit of shame for the way you were living compared to the two ladies who were taking care of you. But you didn’t know how long they’ve been in this line of work. Hell they honestly looked like they were born into it with the cold looks in their eyes. They could care less about your well-being, though they found and scrubbed every inch of you. Of course you didn’t want strangers to look at you, especially after such a moment that brought you here. To be real, these twins are probably the only people who knew you more than anyone you currently knew. 

Friends? You had a few, some to help you out sometimes, some to let you crash at their place. It was all fair game to the people you knew. Life was never easy for them and they knew of you being a free spirit. You didn’t leech off of them for you’d always show up with something in exchange, usually something you stole but it would never get traced back, it was either too common (but useful) or just something that would never be brought out of shown off. 

You weren’t a bad friend for it, if anything you were the perfect guest, though this time you didn’t mean to give yourself away for a few nights stay.

“I gotta get out of here, but where would I go? These people have already seen my face and I can’t tell how many more there would be. I can’t request anything to learn the layout of this place and no one will talk to me. If I leave I’ll have to run further and faster than I already have been…” You ponder more, sitting at the table placed in front of the window. 

They’re smart enough to know what I’d do if I wanted to pick a fight with their lord, of course there are guards at more doors, even under the window out your room, and it’s safe to say that there’s even a guard at each vent that’s connected to your room. 

“Why does it seem like I’m so special?” You sit and open the window, the guard below moves from his post to observe you on the same side has the other posted to view you. You look down at then and offer a wave, saying you’re not doing anything stupid, but you just wanted some air. One of them leaves, probably to get Sukuna. 

“I bet he’s just a lonely loser and I just happen to fall into his lap, or maybe I was one of many and was the newest. The girls here looked like they could be in the same position as you, though why weren’t they? They didn’t look like they were his blood, and there was no way that he could be their dad. That would make things even worse since you’re close in age as the twins. 

You see the guard go back to his post, nonchalantly. “Weirdo.” You thought. Not even a second later your room door whips open. Jumping from your place at the table, you turn and see who other than the man with the unpredictable entrances. “Finally up?” He leans on the door frame. “Honestly, you’re so dramatic for that.” He teased, being strangely familiar to you.

“Dude…” You caught yourself about to tell off this stranger. All you’ve known from him is that he’s having fun taking you and making you a toy, that his name was Sukuna and how everyone seemed under his control. Not that they enjoy it, but it didn’t look like anyone, even in their numbers, would stand up to someone like him. 

It still wasn’t apparent for you. He only told you his first name, his last could tell you that you were in even more danger than any “normal” man doing this to you. It could be such a metaphor but you’re literally trapped in the best place you’ve ever been. Was that just life? all the bad comes up when you’re supposed to be happy, and realizing how good you’ve had it as it gets ripped apart in front of you? The balance of it all only comes with ignorance, which was also why you wouldn’t get attached. You didn’t run to one person for everything you didn’t need more than what you’d ask for and that wasn’t much. If they were lucky you’d be there for 3 days at most. 

You lost your voice, his presence set in, bringing you out of your (if you can all it that) relaxed state. He notices you tense up, the look in your eyes begging him to give your body a break. He huffs and saunters into the room, taking a seat at the end of the bed, the side that’s facing you. “You had some time to clear your head, now tell me what was your intention. Playing dumb suits that pretty face of yours… But that’s not why I’m here.”

You sure knew nothing about this guy. Other than his name and how his body looked. How he felt was different, it just happened so fast that you could only remember how it lingered in your belly after he left you the second time. It wasn’t something you can forget, those were the best orgasms of your life. “Sukuna… I’m serious.” 

“You expect me to believe that? Did I hit you too hard?” You almost wanted to laugh, you saw stars and colors you couldn’t before his knuckles contacted your skull. Lifting his hand from his side to place under his chin made you flinch, a bit too hard for his liking apparently.  It took a lot for you to muster standing up on your own, much less realize you had to get to the table by needing support from the wall. It was like you were in an ice skating rink and had to hold onto the walls for dear life, except there was no ice, it was just pain in your body not letting you level yourself out.

“When you’re ready to talk, I might hear you out. My patience is thin you already know.” He stands and closes your door, sent a shiver down your spine. Him not being close to you, or hurting you, having this quick visit was so unsettling. 

It haunted you for hours. He didn’t touch you. The edge of the bed where he sat still held an energy, like he left a part of him right there to keep watch over you. 

He definitely hit you too hard, you were thinking more outlandish things to go with this scenario. Like why didn’t the touch you? You thought he was going to keep a pattern, that maybe after this he would come in periodically to taunt you. That maybe his patience has worn out and he was going to get rid of you any minute now, or to use you again. 

The trauma you got from this certainly messed with your self soothing methods. Every time you catch yourself hitting your peak of your self imposed orgasms, you were almost wishing you had more than just your fingers. You didn’t want him, but seriously its already been 2 weeks. You were gonna go crazy in here. The girls kept bringing you your meals, and a bathroom is attached, though you couldn’t do much by yourself. 

You were to let the others feed and bathe you, and you honestly hated it. It was way too weird, you never talked to them, and they never tried with you so it felt like there was an agreement to just not speak about it. That none of you were here willingly. That gave you some insight. Your body healed itself enough that you didn’t need the wall to walk anymore, making your trips to the table in front of the window more frequent. 

You notice some sort of schedule Sukuna follows, as well as a few other noticeable men in this kind of gated community. Whatever he has gong on here, it felt like you were almost a stolen princess locked away in a tower or something. “You have GOT TO get a hold of yourself.” You didn’t need to see a doctor or someone, you were fully aware that these thoughts were just you daydreaming to escape reality, yet again. Though this time it was getting boring, you couldn’t help yourself, literally. 

At this point you wanted to even ask one of the guards if they wanted to come in and help you out, but you didn’t have to do that, because a day later you decided to act. Rolling around night time, you decided to open your window a noticeable amount. By then the guards usually leave one guard to patrol the grounds in each quarter. 

The ones outside your door either end up sleeping or one leaves the other for a bathroom break, some nights they both go, probably to blow each other you thought. It wasn’t any of your concern, they did it before when you could barely move, but now you were agile again, enough to move around without hissing at each moment.

 Placing your ear to the door, you heard light snoring through it. “Okay, just find his room you thought. You knew that it took about 60 steps to reach a stair case, then that would be about 24 steps down. You could hear his footsteps through the pairs of others who followed him, as his echoed with pace, and the others almost scuttled behind them like bugs.. 

You find your way slipping past heavy wooden doors, making sure it wouldn’t creak, you saw the walkway in the garden. You looked up and saw your room, you knew it was yours as it was the only one with the window open. you knew that the guard just left this fourth of his grounds. You were searching the area for his room. Peering through the windows, it would have been hard to tell if it was him, but his tattoos were honestly unique. 

None of them were him, you go back to the walkway, going down the opposite end, just blindly working your way through. You couldn’t just walk through any door, it could be your last mistake, it being Sukuna or not. But it just had to be him, you wanted so badly to find his familiar face and just, you don’t know. 

You decide to be more ballsy, there’s surely no way he’s be in the same quarters that has this many people,” you decide to take your chance with the left corridor. “I wouldn’t take him for a cuddly guy anyway.” 

Listen, you know it sounds crazy, but if you even got to escape, you’d be hunted like a fox, unnecessarily, and as a spectacle for others to watch. But if you could find him, and do it yourself, “I mean, at least I’d die with something, and what a funny way to go.” You loved to joke about these kinds of things. Anytime it seemed dark, you’d find yourself cracking a joke or going off an other tangents from the barrage of thoughts coming your way.

You hold your breath as you set your fingers around the doorknob, you pull it back slowly, and turn it, to silence any squeaks it may have. After turning it fully, you let it go back and unclenched your fingers to let it go a second time, making sure there was no noise from the metal trap, and decided to go in. 

What fucking luck you had as if you broke into another room you’d think your breathing would start to give you away. As you head towards the bed, the raising figure laying there was him. Your eyes had adjusted to the dark, so much so that you could just stand in front of him. 

Looking down at him you wondered what you should do. You’re not going to kill him, that’s one thing, though you had nothing to lose, you still liked your life and you enjoyed whatever adventurous you got yourself into. It was always just one thing after the next and you’d rest when needed, but you loved it. 

This was totally different though. Before it was like you were born into this work and have to abide by its rules. As of right now you could do /anything/. What else would you do? 

You look down at him, kneeling at the edge of the bed to face him. Looking at his face like this, completely defenseless, his harsh eyes weren’t poking at you or telling you exactly what he was thinking. No he was just, he looked human. Like if you were to have met him at any other place it would possibly be on a magazine cover or an army recruitment booth posted wherever. 

“Damn bastard is beautiful.” You thought. “I didn’t get this far to stop now. Fucking 2 weeks you keep me here and don’t do anything? Do you know how boring that is? You can’t just keep me here and forget.” All that time alone had gone to your head, did you forget how he treated you the time you met? 

Tbh it fades in and out, your memory’s cut up pieces of film that randomly plays an old memory, and since you can’t recognize it, you call it a dream. 

Nothing could take you away from where you were now. Looking over him, still not a care in the world. Nothing could wake him if he’d allow it. You cocked your head to align your eyes with his, and reach out and brush your fingertips across his jawline. 

How much of this could you enjoy before he kills you for breaking out? Just that thought had you slowly leaning in, your hand before tracing his face was leaning onto the bed to support your intrusion. 

First, you kissed his forehead. The poor fuck probably hadn’t felt the touch of a real lover in ages, he just finds and uses whatever and whoever he wants, whenever. Of course you didn’t pity him, but does he even know what being loved properly was like? You’re really one to be asking. 

You peck the smooth, hot skin, and kissed a line across his cheek, getting more sensual with the next. His touch, even sleeping was still so manly. His body was so, honestly the words seem odd, but he looked so edible. Like you almost couldn’t keep your lips off of him. He was so yummy when you get a good look at him. 

Cupping his face, your lips reach his, beginning to lightly stimulate the connection. You lean in further, applying yourself onto him, guiding open his mouth with yours as you lick his lips. This shit was getting you so excited, considering all that he’s done to you, having this moment, where you’re in control and he was at your mercy, and only you know this.

Continuing to make out with your kidnapper, you moved yourself to get on top of him. His lazy reaction of kissing back had you think he was a deep sleeper, god you really wished. 

You opened your eyes just to make sure he was still asleep, but his eyes were staring back at you, with the same look he always has. You didn’t have time to even make a sound before he had you under him. His hand grabbed your waist and turned kept you parallel to him as his leg pushed his body to get on top. 

You could feel his erection, he was basically stabbing your thighs with his head. His hands pushed your wrists into opposite sides of your head, and he has you immobilized as he sat on your legs. Most you could move was your toes and neck, but he had pressed his face up against yours. 

“I don’t even know where to start with you. If you wanted to kill me, you would’ve already. Maybe I can believe you’re just some random, …but you wouldn’t have come to my room.” He lets a wrist go to reel back and strikes your face as a warning. Seriously, no sane person would just come straight back to him in your situation.

“The guard fell asleep?” Nothing gets by him. You can’t tell if he was just prepared for everything or if he planned this out. The excitement you were feeling before was being clashed with the sudden shock to your face. “Depending how the rest of the night will go will determine his punishment.” 

Keeping everything in place, he moves your chin up by his nose, giving him space to start attacking your neck. “We’ll just start with yours.” His grasp tightened around each wrist, so much so that he was pulling on the tendons in your forearms, making your fingers involuntary curl. 

Your luck may have run out, but you weren’t as scared. Trying to enjoy the moment as much as possible, knowing fully well that you’re about to be eaten alive, and god, youve been waiting. His teeth grazed your collar bone, making their way back up, making themselves a known threat to your neck. 

“Speak.” He orders. “Who sent you?” 

“You still think I’m a spy?” The spot where he hit you was pounding, but it didn’t hurt. Other parts of your body were just pulsating along with your heartbeat, you knew he was going to take that as a sign of fear. 

“Hurry up, we have a meeting tomorrow so I’m trying to be considerate for everyone else.” 

He’s still not listening. You weren’t either at this point, finding his roughing up sort of endearing. Maybe he didn’t want to get blood on his bed, or maybe he did care about that stupid meeting. All you could feel was vigorous pulsating from your wrists, your face, your heart, and more than anything else, your pussy. 

This was literally what you came here to do, this was why he even took you with him wasn’t it? Seriously whatever big shot he thinks he is… this shit wasn’t legal; You were serious on going out with a bang, raising your hips to create some friction on his hard on. 

Sukuna seemed to notice the look in your eyes and gave you another firm slap. “Focus, doll.” He adjusts his hips a few inches too far down your liking, his hands being the only thing touching you. 

“Put it back.” You got this far, now he wants to start questioning you immediately after waking up? He picked you up after meeting and ignored you for two weeks, you’re about to do what most others would. Especially if they’re in the same situation with the same circumstances.

“You’re not the one to be giving orders, much less to me.” 

You raise your hips back up to his head, having it dip into you, crossing your clit but unable to enter fully. His tip could find its way in no problem, it was just his call, and that almost drove him over the edge. You’ve stopped fighting back, for something like your freedom and what’s better for you. 

What you were after now was just one more orgasm brought by that monstrous mf. He doesn’t drop his guard, or change his face at all as he accepted “your bait/distraction”. In this position, you’re still straight legged, laying in his bed as he has you held down, arms pinned, palms up, and legs trapped as he sat on your thighs. 

He could easily kill you now, but it would honestly leave a bad taste as no one’s been killed in his room before, much less even entered without permission. You both didn’t know what to think really. 

To you he’s some strange and strong asshole who’s been unclear if you were his sex toy or if you were “invited” and he was just being a terrible host. Honestly, it felt worse to you to have everything you needed; Without your freedom, you were honestly thinking it’d be better to be dead. 

To him, you were dangerous. You got it all right. From the room, to the person to bump into, to the alley. You could have been a spy laying low, from whichever gang he thought you were from, he thought it would be good to hold you off to send a message to see who would come collect you first. They wouldn’t send someone if they didn’t have something to say. 

At first he did just want to keep you until one of them sent them back another message. It didn’t matter what happened to you, honestly he got bored. He’s a busy man, there was really nothing else to say. 

So imagine his surprise how you came crawling all over him tonight. He knew an assassin would’ve done it before he even knew the door opened, they were to make sure it was quick. The attack would have had to been fatal, whether they succeed in one shot or have them die as they’re leaving. And how quick they leave is how desperately they want to live. 

You, just came in to stare at him and decided you wanted something else. And it didn’t seem like revenge. That was a first, especially for him. Right now he was allowing it, letting you go. There was no way you could harm him, he concluded. 

Looking down at you squirm and pout, upset on how close you were to getting what you’ve been aching from and for. He won’t drop his guard, but he sure as hell was silver platter served. Really how badly did you want it?

He connects your wrists at the top of your head with one hand, the other has its index finger and thumb at the base, controlling himself with those two fingers. He raises his erection and knocked it against your clit, the strikes sent waves of pleasure from your core to the top of your head and palm of your feet, having you whimper out. 

Your aching hole needed him, it was taking him so long. Seriously you wish he’d kill you now because this so actually torture. The only thing you could do was start to cry, tears leaving their corners and running into your hair. You were more than frustrated. Angry, horny, needy, powerless, you wanted it so bad you were losing control, it didn’t matter, no one else could judge you, and who would be worse than Sukuna?

“You came in here, climb all over me, just to cry now? You’re so pathetic.” 

“Please,” You whine. “I want you to put it in.”

His face changed, from laughing at you beg, to sharpening his focus. Even after all this, getting caught, threatened, insulted, you’ve started to beg for it. He takes his legs up from pinning yours, putting them to your sides as he aligns himself to your front hole. “Say it again.”

“Please Sukuna, put it in-“ He lowers his hips and dives deep into you. He watches as your head writhes. Instantly youre spread apart, the sudden plunge casted a warm blush across your face and electricity towards the tips of your fingers. “Oooh,” 

“Fuuuuuck.” He finished for you. He continues to grind deeply into you, quickly using his now free hand to gag you from waking everyone up. Good thing too as you were messy, fucked silly couldn’t cover it. You gave up control a long time ago. He wouldn’t kill you, not right now anyway, you especially wouldn’t let him without trying to get one last nut. It was diabolical how down bad he had you. It was more of your unhealed trauma and he just happened to be the best person to help you out, willing or not.

——————————————————————————

You lay there as the base of your back ached. Every part of your body was bruised again, you could only imagine to move again as you tried catching your breath. You had lost count on just how many times he’s forced an orgasm out of you, mind numbingly rich euphoria every time. Nothing else mattered, you were more than thrilled the first 2 times but started to wonder if he ever got tired. 

It wasn’t until after your fifth orgasm that he managed to get his first one in. You were honestly almost regretting climbing into his room but his second had him pinning you on your back as he lay on your lower torso and legs. You couldn’t feel anything but your pulsating cervix, half feeling good from the pain and lingering pleasure, the other half making you know that this was a mistake and the nausea was on you. 

Raising your free arm, you weakly start to pat his head. It was over, you insatiable perverted needs were fulfilled, so what were you going to do now? It’s not like you’re in love with the guy, you don’t even know if you’ll get to wake up tomorrow with this stunt. “It was worth it.” You thought. Running your fingers thorough his hair, and tracing his back, you fall asleep holding him, accepting that this is it.

[deepdisireslonging]

Mark You as Mine

The Reader walks in on Ricky pinned to the wall by another woman. She sets out to remind the wrestling world, and Ricky, that his is spoken for.

Pairing: Ricky Starks x Wrestler!Reader; appearances by House of Glory wrestlers Ultra Violette and Daron Richardson

Warnings/Promises: jealousy, lipstick (kink?), SMUT, dom!Reader, oral (male receiving), p-in-v, implied further smut

Word Count: 3000

Note: I am back on my lipstick print shenanigans. I still miss seeing my man on screen, and I hope things work out for Ricky soon. In the meantime… have some smut. Prewarning: I am not familiar with the HOG roster, so if what I wrote is out of character for Violette and Daron, my apologies. I’m super happy with how this turned out. Let me know what you think with comments and reblogs! Happy reading <3

“Hey, ease up. You shouldn’t be in here.”

“You gonna kick me out, pretty boy?”

Squinting, you followed the sound of giggling. The closer you got to your and Ricky’s dressing-room door, the louder the sounds of struggle became. If it truly was a struggle. Your hand hesitated over the handle. After a rushed breath, you swung open the door.

Ricky twisted away as Ultra Violette planted a loud kiss on his cheek. He was flushed and placed his hands on her shoulders to push her away (again), when he saw you. “Hey.” He looked between you and Violette. “This – this isn’t what it looks like.” Before he could push the woman away, she caught his wrists and wrapped them around her waist.

“Maybe it’s exactly what it looks like.” She stared you down. When Ricky managed to free his wrists, she didn’t reach for them again. But she stared you down, unmoving from her spot between you and your partner.

Swallowing hard, Ricky watched how even your breathing was. “Violette. You need to leave.” He rolled his eyes when she didn’t move. “Bitch, I said get lost.”

The second she took her eyes off to retort, that’s when you moved. You took your turn to pin Ricky to the wall with your forearm pressed against his collarbone. “There’s no need for name-calling.” You kept your voice even. The calmness in your tone was working. Even Violette was beginning to pick up on the rage rolling off you in waves. “But like he said… get lost.”

Violette bumped into the door, and then the frame before she made it out of the room. She broke through the camera crew who had arrived to catch the fireworks.

You turned back to Ricky. “I know you have a good explanation prepared. But I don’t want to hear it. There had to be several steps for her to get that close to you. And I am not interested in hearing excuses.” Your head whipped to the camera crew, making the guy holding the mic flinch. “As for you all… get out of here.” Ricky stayed put as you closed the door between the pair of you and prying eyes. The click of the lock echoed like a death knoll.  

***

The next time anyone saw Ricky Starks, he was staggering his way around backstage. Hiking his cruiserweight title over his shoulder, Daron Richardson caught him before he could lose his balance. “You good there?”

Ricky blinked slowly. And grinned. He wobbled into the light, showing off how his skin was littered in bright red lipstick prints. “I’m… great. How’s your night going?”

Daron chuckled. “Not as well as yours, apparently.” He released Ricky, but kept his hands up a few seconds until he knew the man wasn’t going to topple over. “I’m surprised your woman let you out of her sight.”

“She’s got her reasons.”

The main reason drifted into the same backstage alcove as the guys. Violette took one look at Ricky and smirked. “Your partner’s got a weird way of showing her ire.”

He shook his head. “I think she’s made her point… exquisitely.” His vision glassed over as he thought back to you expressing your “ire.” His grin widened and he shrugged. “I can’t help it if you can’t read between the lines.”

Violette tried to swagger her way into his space, but he spun away from her, nearly toppling Daron in the process. “Fine. Then spell it out for me?” She pouted. “How could she possibly be better for you than me?”

“Spark Notes: Why would I ever what a woman like you when I have a woman like her?” He looked to one side where you had stepped into view. “How’s that summary?”

You smiled as you crossed your arms. “Sounds good to me. Short. To the point.”

Violette clenched her fists and jaw. “You-“

“And if you ever try to steal what’s mine again-” You quickly moved to stand nose-to-nose with her. “I will put you in the ground. Do we understand one another?”

For a second it looked like Violette was going to swing at you. But she decided against it as your stillness unnerved her. “Yeah. I suppose we understand one another.” With a huff and without a backwards glance, she stomped her way down the hall.

Daron whistled. “How’s that for entertainment. Damn. Hey, you gotta sister?”

“No, sorry,” you shrugged. “Only child.”

He glanced at Ricky and his collection of lipstick prints. “Well, put this man on three strikes. If he screws up again, my door is aways open. The way I see it, you could count all this as two strikes already.”

You leaned into the possessive way Ricky wrapped his arm around your waist. “I’ll keep that in mind. Have a good night.”

“Night.” He gave Ricky one more glance and a wide grin before leaving you two alone.

Ricky hummed. “That cruiserweight title looks nice.”

“Mhmm.”

“It like look even better sitting on someone else’s shoulder.”

You glanced up at him. “Spotting your next target already? A little soon, don’t you think?” Removing his arm from your waist, you stepped back towards the dressing room. “It can wait. I think you’ve done enough plotting for one night.” You watched him lean against the wall with a huff. Holding out your hand, you tilted your head. “You coming? I’ve got a few plots of my own. If you’re interested.”

“Are they similar to the ones you’ve planted on me already?” He ran a thumb across one of the lip prints before sliding his hand into yours.

“They’re better.”

***

 Ricky barely had time to drop the bags on the hotel floor before you were on him.

“Oh, so it’s gonna be like that?”

“It’s gonna be like that.” You gave his chest a slight push.

His body bounced slightly where it landed on the bed. He leaned up onto his forearms. “You know I’d never really fall for something like that, right?”

“I know.” You leaned over him, letting him kiss around your neck and down the swell of your breasts. The backstage segments had gone better than you expected. It was a little worrisome that Violette was so eager to follow your instructions to get caught with Ricky. But now you had an in for ever challenging Violette, and Ricky had an in for ever challenging Daron. The soft extended entrance into House of Glory was just as you planned. And now, both of you could celebrate. AEW’s exile wasn’t going to stop you.

Ricky fumbled with the buttons on his shirt while you kissed him down into the sheets. You had refreshed your lipstick before confronting Violette the second time. Your new kisses left new marks next to the first ones. He couldn’t help but notice your placement between his legs. Or his placement so close to the edge of the bed. Shimmying down, he tried to adjust to what he thought you had planned. But he was wrong. He hummed, surprised, into your kisses as you guided him further up the bed instead. With a hiss, he eagerly watched you trail a nail down between his pecs and zig-zagging across his stomach. There was too much fabric on his shoulders. But every time he tried to unbutton the cuffs, you were there to entwine your fingers in his, or leaning into his space, or distracting him with your mouth on his skin.

You waited until he could barely keep his eyes open. His bulge pressed hot and insistent against your thigh. Grinding onto it, you smirked into the desperate, shuddering kisses he pressed to the side of your mouth. Guiding him to lean up, you began to roughly push the shirt over his shoulders, feeling him up as you went. Ricky protested as your nails caught the fabric.

“Hey, easy. It’s a Vuitton.”

You glanced at the tag. “No. It’s from Belk. There wasn’t a chance in hell you were going to risk one of your nice shirts with some random woman rubbing all over you.”

He pursed his lips in agreement. “Maybe. But you don’t have to try to ruin it.”

“I won’t.” You slid the fabric down till only his wrists were covered, trapped in the cuffs. You bunched the rest of the shirt fabric around his hands, further restricting his movements. With a gleam in your eye, you leaned down to whisper in his ear. “I’d never ruin your stuff. But you? I’ll ruin you every chance I get.”

“Playing dirty, are we?”

“Not yet. But I’ll get there.”

With a bit of extra maneuvering, you eventually had Ricky laid out with his arms reached back over his head. You couldn’t help but lick your lips while looking at his form. You would never tire of the view. If you didn’t like seeing it so much while he wrestled, you’d have him fight in a shirt so you could keep it all to yourself. You shook your head. Focus. You needed to focus. If you gave this man too much room, he’d be out of his bindings in a second and you’d lose control for the rest of the night. You took off your shirt to level the playing field. Ricky groaned. And then again as you squeezed your breasts over your bra.

Ricky thrust his hips up into yours. “C’mon, t’amie. Get me out of these. M’ ready for you.”

You dragged your hands down his thighs over his pants first, before dragging them down. The room already felt hot as you removed your own and the rest, baring your all to him before you brought his length into the open. Settling yourself at the base of the bed, you gently wrapped your hand around his cock. “You are ready for me.”

He nodded. “Been ready all night.” His grin was highlighted by the plethora of lipstick prints still littering his skin. If he was honest, he’d been ready since you put them there that afternoon.

Seeing him marked up kindled a fire in your belly. You finally knew what he meant by those looks he gave when you wore jewelry that he bought for you, or wore his favorite color. Chest warm with possessiveness, you gently began to work your hand up and down his length. Your lips parted as Ricky tossed his head back. He really was pretty. All that toned muscle and warm skin arched for you in ecstasy. While he panted under your touch and twisted the fabric around his hands, you quietly shifted further down the bed. The first pass of your mouth over his length made you hum.

 Ricky mumbled a string of phrases in broken Creole.

“What was that, Darling?” You licked his cock from balls to tip, making him gasp a different tumble of words. “Translation, please?”

“Don’t – don’t stop,” he finally rasped.

Maybe it was cruel to toy with him. Getting caught with Violette was just acting, a work. But, if you were honest, you’d been worked up too since covering him in lipstick prints. You worked him over in every way you knew would make him vocal. And, with his hands tied back, you thought there wasn’t a way for him to stop the sound. You grumbled against this thigh as he bit his lip instead. “Want to hear you, Darling.”

“Thin walls.”

“So?” You swallowed him down, loving that it caught him off-guard enough for his whine to escape. “That’s never stopped us before.” You moved quickly, trying to get him loud again. Up and down, hollowing and sucking, you tried everything. When your mouth wasn’t occupied with a bit of his length, your hand attended too.

To his credit, Ricky did well in staying quiet. But he writhed under your touch. His stomach flexed and his hands tugged roughly at his shirt. He couldn’t seem to decide between watching you work and squeezing his eyes shut against the pleasure.

You brought him to the brink several times, always pulling back before he could spill into your mouth or over your hands. But you were getting impatient. The heat between your own thighs was becoming impossible to ignore. You tightened your grip at the base of his cock.

“Which way do you want me? Front or back?”

Ricky’s eyes were screwed shut. His chest heaved. As your hand smoothed up his stomach and over his pecs, he groaned. “Whichever you like. But get me out of this.” He brought the shirt tangled around his wrists down into your face. “Let me touch you.”

“But I’m touching you plenty.” You gave his cock a twist. “What more could you want? Aren’t I enough woman for you?”

“Plenty. But… need to touch you. Make you feel good. C’mon, ma’cha. Let me out.” He struggled, trying to pull his strong hands through the tight cuffs.

You worked quickly to release him before he could rip the fabric.

When he got his hands on you, he pulled you close. You ended up sitting in his lap with your chest pressed to his. His fingertips dug into your waist, holding you in place even as you tried to roll your hips. You tried to raise up so you could sink onto his length, but Ricky was too focused on sucking a mark into the curve of your neck to give you the chance.

“Gonna kill that Daron.”

“What? Daron?” You’d barely given the man a second glance. And it wasn’t like you considered him a theat.

“He shouldn’t have even looked at you. Even if I did get to ‘three strikes’ with you, he’d never be able to treat you right.”

You finally gave yourself some space by shoving him slightly with your hand splayed wide across his chest. “You do realize we have a meeting with him tomorrow. Planning for any future title shots.”

“Good.”

He tilted your head the other way so he could start another mark to mirror the first. As you gripped his biceps, Ricky finally lifted you up so you could have what you wanted. He pressed his forehead to yours as he filled you. While both of you adjusted, and while you shivered in his lap, he darkened his marks on your throat. He waited for you to rock in his lap before he began to move. He muffled your shout with a deep kiss.

Maybe you shouldn’t have toyed with him so much earlier. Ricky was more than willing to return the favor. He watched, enraptured and slightly smug, as you dropped deeper and deeper into bliss. And it gave him no small pleasure to feel your fingers smear the lipstick prints across his skin in your desperation to feel him. He quickened his pace of bouncing you on his cock.

“Look at me, ma’cha. C’mon. Let me see those pretty eyes.” His self-satisfied voice hummed against the curve of your shoulder.  

Couillion, you thought.

It was a herculean effort. And it didn’t help that he pinned you down onto his lap until you managed to open your eyes.

“There you are.” He grinned, looking just a sex-drunk as you felt. “Getting close?”

You tried to bounce on your own as a reply, but he tightened his grip on your hips. “Yes, Darling. So close.” With a whine, you flexed your walls around him and squirmed. With your thumb, you smeared another of the lip-prints. “Ricky, please. Fuck me like only you can-“

Ricky took the invitation like a dare. He leaned forward until you fell back into the sheets. Pinned beneath him, all you could do was hold on as he thrust into you. The change in angle crossed your vision. He chuckled as you cried out. “Gonna take such good care of you, Baby. Let go for me. Want to see you fall apart. For me.”

It didn’t take much. Never did. Your hands clawed into his arms and back as you scrambled to ground yourself. Ricky never stopped moving. His hips changed angles. And he circled his thumb on your clit. But he kept moving until your vision whited out and your body tensed with release. His pace picked up. Leaning closer, he deepened his thrusts, chasing his own end. When he found it, he groaned into one of the hickies on your neck. His arms gave out. Ricky pinned you beneath his tangle of limbs, but kept you speared on his length. For a minute, both of you were content to settle into the glow.

“Since when – since when are you worried about Daron?”

“I’m not. Just like you’re not worried about Violette.” He arched a brow at you as you nodded in agreement. “Like I told her: why would I want her when I’ve got you?”

Humming, you added, “ditto, when I’ve got you.” You ran a hand over your throat, feeling the slight, but pleasant ache of being marked by him. “How am I supposed to hide these tomorrow?”

“You’re not.”

You frowned at him.

He shrugged, then sighed and settled his head onto your shoulder. His hips rolled.

You whimpered. “We can’t stay like this.”

“Why not?”

You rolled your eyes. “Firstly, we’re upside down on the bed. It might be difficult to sleep under the sheets like this. And secondly, we really need to wash off all those kisses. If the hotel staff find all that red on their linens, they’re going to think I killed you.”

“Fine.” He kissed the underside of your jaw. Snagging his shirt, he cleaned you up as he pulled out. Ricky chuckled at your reactions. “It’ll wash. And, even if it was a Vuitton, it would be worth ruining for you.” He tugged you to your feet. Pushing you towards the shower, he promised in your ear, “I want to suck more marks into your skin that no one will ever get to see. Only me.”

***

Masterlist

More Ricky Fics:

Broken Negotiations (A, Whump)

Surrender (A, Whump)

Sundress Season (S, F)

Necklace (S)

Stuck (CNC, S, A, F)

[hours2hours]

THE HAWKINS PARADOX: CHAPTER TWENTY

“Joel?” I croak, crawling on my elbows towards him. It would be pointless to try and stop myself from crying, so I don’t bother. I wasn’t able to see what part of him they were kicking, but his face says it all. His nose drips bright red blood and his face is coated with shoe prints and dirt, with red patches of irritated skin.

“Fuck…” I whisper, words trembling as badly as my hands. “This is all my fucking fault I- I’m so sorry.” 

“Really thought the costume would work,” he chuckles darkly while lifting himself up. I put an arm under his to try and lift him, but I can hardly stand on my own. I need the universe to quit spinning so fast around me first.

By some miracle, the two of us find our footing, stabilizing each other with our weight and holding each other upright before we’re able to let go and stand on our own. Even so, Joel leans over like he’s going to throw up, panting and wiping the blood on his sleeve. He laughs quietly, then takes a few steps towards the front of the house while holding the side of his body, wincing with every step. 

“Stop, you’re gonna hurt yourself,” I cry.

“I’m already hurt if ya haven’t noticed.”

“Can you shut up?” Underneath Joel’s shirt the skin is beet-red, might have broken a bone or two.

“Ain't as bad as it looks,” Joel mumbles.

“What is wrong with you?”

“Thought we went over that yesterday-” 

“Those assholes just beat the shit out of you! Don’t try to lie and tell me you’re fine, cause you’re not.”

“I’ve been beat up more times than I can count. Stressin’ about it is fuckin’ useless.”

“You’re wrong.” I say while Joel limps toward the sidewalk and down the road. I try and keep upright with an arm along his shoulder, but it might be for me as much as him. I almost forgot how wasted I was for a minute, but now that I’m coming down from the adrenaline high I’m aware of my state of intoxication and the pain in my head. I have to let go of Joel to touch the spot, which makes me lose my balance and stumble. If Joel didn’t catch my hand, I would have fallen all the way down the street. “Hold on, lemme see that,” he says, sitting next to me on the curb and rummaging through my hair. His fingers come back red and he curses under his breath. I can tell just from the way he breathes that he’s making an effort not to scream. 

“Those fuckin’-” Joel silences himself.

“That was them, wasn’t it?” I ask.

“Read my mind. They’ve gotten physical now.”

“Well who the hell was it? You have to have some idea.”

“Myers is Aaron, clearly.” He trails off, staring towards the lake. He stands and continues down the hill while I follow.

I must be too drunk to have noticed at the time, but there’s no mistaking that laugh. “Shit. What are we gonna do about it?”

“Nothing,” Joel shakes his head. “I don’t care.”

“What?”

Joel doesn’t respond, and instead picks his bike up from the pavement, handlebars in hand but unmoving. “I’m takin’ you home,” he says hollowly.

“Shit, I didn’t even think of that,” I smack my forehead at my own stupidity. “Dad’s going to be back already, and I can’t come home like this, I’m so screwed!”

“Miles you’re nineteen, who gives a fuck what your dad thinks?”

“My brother and mom are dead. If he finds out I was almost killed tonight he’ll never let me leave the house 'til I move out!” I close my eyes and cover my face with my hands. How could I possibly screw up more in one night? I got Joel beat up, I got drunk and hurt. “Okay, here’s a plan,” I begin pacing back and forth on the empty road. “I tell my dad I’m crashing at Annie’s place for the night, and I can come sleep over at your house until I’m sober. Is that cool?”

Joel’s face turns ice cold, he drops the bike back onto the ground, eyes drifting away from me. He collapses onto the curb as if suddenly he lost the ability to stand.

“It’s a good plan, but I don’t have a house anymore.”

“What?”

“Mum an’ dad didn’t take it well, as expected.”

I sit next to him facing the empty street, only the faint beat of music sounds atop the hill. I don’t know what to say, there’s really nothing to say in response to something like that. I slowly rest my head against his shoulder, where I can feel him fighting the urge to cry.

“But here’s a better plan,” he continues. “You tell your dad you slept at Annie’s, then we’ll sneak you in through your bedroom window.”

“I’m not leaving you alone again,” I whisper.

He pauses, choking back his tears. “You should really just go.”

I shoot up the curb defiantly. “We can pass a few hours until morning, can’t we?”

“You’re kiddin’.”

“I sure ain’t,” I say, mimicking Joel’s drawl.

“Funny guy when you’re drunk eh?”

“The world is basically ending for the both of us. So why don’t we just stop giving a fuck?” My words show in the way my body hangs limply, as if waiting for the wind to blow me away. 

He smiles slightly and stands on wobbly legs. “Fine, since you insist.” He picks his bike back up and hops on the seat.

“I’m not gonna survive a ride on those pegs right now.”

“Oh, right. Guess we can walk.”

“What’s the rush anyway? We’ve got a whole night to kill.”

Joel and I start through the empty town, slowed by our conditions. Though the bleeding stopped after a while, I can’t imagine Joel’s bruises feel any good. If it’s as bad as it should be, he does an excellent job hiding it. eStrangely, there are a lot of things I feel like blurting out at any given second. Things like “Holy shit the moon is cool,” or “jesus christ that girl hitting on me at the party was pretty”. Random things that pop into my mind, many of them I say, many of them I might regret tomorrow morning. Joel comments at the admiring outbursts. From stories I can assume he knows what it’s like, and won’t hold it against me when the sun rises. But there’s an undeniable appreciation I feel for everything around me, from the chirping bugs to the flowers closed for the night. For Joel, who could have made me go home but didn’t, and who corrects my path when I veer off course. There’s not a doubt in my mind he’d carry me home if needed, even though he couldn’t handle my weight.

It turns out I was so distracted with Joel that I forgot to ask where he was taking me. “The corner store?”

“Just a pit stop.”

He asks me to wait outside, so I do. Despite how confident I feel, the empty streets still bring back that unease I’d forgotten since this morning. I keep an eye on him through the front window of the store as he counts the change from his pocket. Eventually he comes back, handing me a bottle of ibuprofen and water.

“Down a couple of these, you’ll feel better.”

We resume the trek North, towards downtown Matlock. Waves crash against the shore not far from us, and they’re loud tonight. Unfortunately the entire sky is black and cloudy now, leaving no room for the moon’s glow to shine through. It’s difficult to see anyway, even when Joel guides the two of us to the sandy shore where we continue our walk. He must have grown tired of carrying that bike around though, so he chains it up again to a tree bordering the beach. We both take off our shoes so we can feel the moist sand under our feet. I still don’t know where we’re going, but when I come around to asking, Joel just says, “You showed me your spot, now it’s my turn.”

I took it to mean that it’s better left a surprise, so I kept my mouth shut on the topic. Otherwise, Joel is quieter than usual overall, so I try to pick things up by talking about video games, something I know Joel likes based on the old systems in his room. Turns out we have a lot of nostalgic overlap, with some differing opinions.

“...and the remaster, oh my god.”  I continue, waving my hands in the air. Joel pushes some trees aside, as we’ve been walking for so long that we’ve passed the beach and find ourselves in the wooded area outside of town. The walk became exhausting as the terrain slowly inclined. Joel and I each hold our phones out as flashlights.

“Miles…”

“What a lazy, cash-grab piece of dogshit, right?” 

“Miles,” he says again, when I notice he’s looking at me. I look him in the eyes back, “Jesus, sorry. Wow I’m rambling tonight.”

“You know I love your rambling, but we’re here.”

My cheeks feel hot before I realize our destination. It’s the lighthouse from the edge of town, though I’ve never seen it this close before. Mateo pointed it out to me once, droned on about how pretty it was, how he’d take me one day.

The stone structure stands taller than I would have expected from a distance, but it's near impossible to see in the dark. It hasn’t been lit since I’ve lived here, so I have to assume it’s out of commission. “Woah,” I shine my light high up. 

He grins and starts to the side of the massive structure. Following him, I stagger back at the sight of a cliffside, leading to the rocky shore below.

“Annie an’ I used to blaze here, not so much lately. Think Otto’s been talking her out of it.” 

“Yeah, he got weird tonight about Annie drinking too much. He’s got a thing for her you know.”

“I thought everyone knew that? She doesn’t like him back though, says he’s just a study partner.”

I walk and lean slightly over the ledge. “He and Annie were arguing though.” 

Joel holds me back with his arm, “Careful there.”

It’s probably not a great idea to walk near an edge in my condition, so I sit a few feet back on the grass. I lay on my back to take in the size of the structure. Clouds shift, the moon’s glow peaks through to illuminate the lake.

“It’s not so surprising,” Joel sighs. “He doesn’t have to be weird about it… but it’s gotta be hard liking someone who doesn’t like you back.”

A moment of silence as the clouds continue to shift, slowly but surely revealing the vast sky. “Check it out,” I say. Joel groans and falls back, face close to mine so that I can clearly hear his jagged hot breath close to my ear.

“They’re so bright tonight,” Joel remarks. “I miss how the stars look out here, away from town.”

“The only thing I love about leaving the city is that I can always see them.”

“You miss it a lot?”

“Yeah, maybe. I miss the way things were when I lived there, when I had my mom, a brother. But I dunno. When we left for the last time noticed I left my window open. And maybe it sounds dumb, but it felt like a sign that we shouldn’t have left.”

“So you’re probably gonna move back now that you’re graduating?”

“I doubt it. My Dad needs me, this is where my mom grew up, and where my brother last lived. Plus you’re here. But… lately I wish I could just vanish without a trace, you know?”

Joel turns to face me. “You think about runnin’ away?”

“Just daydreams,” I reply. “When I was a little kid I tried it, before I was too scared to even leave the house. Maybe if all that fear went away I could, but sometimes I feel like I’m locked in a box.”

“Makes sense considering what you just went through. But you’ll get back on track like you did before. Right?”

“Right,” I smile. I tilt my head up to gaze at the sky, spotting a smudgy white mark. “You see that? It’s just above the horizon.”

“I’ve got no idea what you’re pointin’ at,” Joel replies.

I put my face close to his, so that I can more accurately point with his line of sight. “That little oval right there. That’s the Andromeda galaxy, the closest galaxy to our ours, and the farthest thing you can see with your eyes.”

“Woah, pretty freaky. You’re really into that astronomy shit, right?”

“What gave it away?”

“The paintings, telescope, posters, this conversation. I could go on.”

“It’s a bit of a passion of mine.”

“Oh yeah? What else can ya show me?”

I try to recall the objects visible in the night sky tonight. I shift my head to view another area of the sky, not too far from Andromeda. “That’s Jupiter right there…”  I say, pointing close to him. “...and that right next to it… I’m pretty sure that’s Saturn. Makes me wish I had a more powerful telescope. Even without it, looking at all these distant objects changes my whole perspective on the world. It’s awe-inspiring.”

“I like hearing you talk about it. Makes me feel like dust.”

“It messes with your head in the best way. Makes our human problems feel insignificant.” I’m about to continue but Joel releases a shuttered breath, like he has something difficult to say, so I wait.

“You heard of the Fermi paradox?” He asks.

The Fermi Paradox is the idea that the universe, as vast and ancient as it is, should be teeming with alien life already. Intelligent beings should have already populated the entire universe with all the time that’s passed, but we’ve found nothing. many scientists believe that life is impossible to exist after a certain point in development. Whether its destroying their habitat, killing each other, or extinction events like asteroids or gamma ray bursts. “I’m familiar. Why do you ask?”

“Yesterday in the woods I told you how hopeless I felt. That’s why.” Joel mumbles.

“Because aliens might not be real?”

“Let me finish. The Fermi Paradox inspired my own idea. ” After lying back down on the grass, Joel reaches his arms out towards Jupiter, then allows them to fall back to his sides. “Social media is like a telescope to the rest of the world, an’ I still don’t see anyone like me getting a happy ending. I’ve never heard a song about love between two men, or two women. If g-... if people like me can be happy… where are they?”

“What kind of ending is that?” I ask.

“Just an ending with a good life. With someone I love who loves me back, and never stops,” he whispers. “But it’s impossible. Tonight is exactly why.”

I’d never have expected Joel to be a romantic. But maybe I had him all wrong, maybe he only became the person he is because of the way he was always beaten down by his family and the world to feel hopeless. Maybe Joel only acts the way he does because he doesn’t see a point in rooting for a future it doesn’t look like he can have.

“Let’s climb to the top of this thing,” I say.

“I dunno if we can get in,” he sniffles.

“Did that stop us at the diner? Or my house?”

“Guess not,” Joel stands and coughs again. He seems surprised when I grab his wrist and pull him all the way to the front of the building, where we come to face a wooden barricade. It seems like a dead end until we wander around the back and discover a window we might be able to climb through. There’s no way Joel can reach it on his own though, so I clasp my fingers together to boost him up.

“Don’t cut yourself on that glass,” I say, hoisting him up.

“Yeah yeah.” He crawls halfway through the frame and extends a hand.

 He’s weak from the fight and general body mass, but he’s able to counterbalance enough that I can walk up the side, then fall after him into the cylindrical building. Thankfully, we land a short ways up the wooden staircase so the fall isn't too far. I wipe the dirt off my pants and snort, because I totally forgot I was dressed like Spider-man. Joel rolls his eyes probably thinking I’m crazy, and shines his light through the room.

It looks even bigger on the inside despite a more limited view. We shine our lights upwards in unison where a rickety spiraling staircase winds up and up without coming to a visible end. I make one step up, and it creaks loudly below my feet, a sound that shouldn't be funny, but somehow is. “Let’s go!” I exclaim, grabbing Joel by the wrist again before he’s had a chance to properly gain his bearings. Spiraling and spiraling, the steps creak and crack under our feet, but I’m not anxious about it as I’d normally be. A step or two will bend under our weight, but we persist without a glance back. We’re both winded when we arrive at the top, which is a small room below where the spotlight would normally be. There’s a trap door in the ceiling, and a short ladder at the far end of the room. The scent of rat leavings and mildew has us plugging our noses, so we make it up the ladder as fast as we can, pushing through the trap door to reveal a balcony surrounded by metal railings.

Joel dusts off his pants and checks his calves for ticks, until he looks up at the view, which is nothing short of breathtaking. The moon is in full view now, hanging gracefully above the water which reflects its magnificent glow in ripples across short waves. The clouds frame the scene perfectly, an astonishing final touch on a painting yet to be. I grasp the rail and lean over to view of the ground below. We spend a second watching down while wave after wave crashes into the rocky cliffside, spraying water upwards with its force.

Around the opposing side of the balcony, we’re able to see Matlock Beach in its entirety, but on a grand scale unachievable from Annie’s rooftop. Speaking of, the house is clear atop its hill. The lights still blare inside and I blow a sigh of relief knowing I won’t ever have to go to one of those again. Other than that, Matlock looks so peaceful from up here, houses among trees, the school and churches and the downtown block, only tainted by the glowing eyes peeking through the trees. Caught up in the sight, I hadn’t noticed the strong winds that are blocked off from the side that faces the water, and I’m nearly blown into the railings before Joel steadies me.

“Was waitin’ for somethin’ like that to happen, let's sit.”

We go back to the side that faces the lake, where we both sit with our legs through the railings, only one small bar separating mine from his.

After minutes fly by watching the horizon, Joel hangs his arms loosely from the bars. The moon highlights the puffiness of his face, reminding me of exactly why I brought him up here.

“So, there are a few theories disproving the Fermi paradox, but this one's my favourite,” I begin. “Since the big bang, the universe has been expanding at an accelerating rate. Every single galaxy has been moving farther away from each other for almost fourteen billion years. So, where are the aliens? Well naturally, a smaller universe with just as much shit flying around in it is more chaotic than an older, larger universe. That means more stuff to kill you or, say, a developing civilization.  Asteroids supernovae, or gamma ray bursts can all end a world in a snap. “But, some have posed this question: what if the only reason we still exist is because of the universe's expansion? Now that enough time has passed, these world-ending events no longer occur so frequently. Some think we came along at just the right time to live in a peaceful universe, and maybe we’re the only life we’ve seen yet, but we’re just the first of so many.”

“Well said man, I almost forgot you were drunk.” Joel chuckles. ”It’s a beautiful thought, and your optimism is what I love about you. But what’s it got to do with me?”

“People like us haven’t had it the greatest through history. Some truly evil people made us think it better to hide than be who we really are. But the world is finally changing. Every single year more and more of society is growing to accept us.” Gazing out into the stars once again, Joel watches with me. “The stars and galaxies seem static, maybe they’re just too slow for us to see. Maybe if we hold tight and come back in a while, things will be a little different.”

“People like…us?“ Joel mumbles. “We should listen to some music,” he says.

“Joel-”

“I’m glad you’re hopeful, but I don’t understand. Look at everything that’s happening to us and tell me things get better.”

“Things will get better,” I say. “Maybe not everyone can see it but I know you’re an incredible pearson who’s just trapped in a closed-minded town. I understand.”

Joel sighs, “Thanks Miles, but let’s talk it over more later.”

“Take some time to think on it. But yeah, some music would be great.”

“Give me something nice to listen to.”

“Oh, uh,” I feel the ground for some grass before realizing we’re a hundred feet in the air. “I dunno if you’d really like my music.”

Joel laughs, “I’ve always thought a person’s music taste tells the most about their character. Probably why Aaron mostly listens to country. I’ve known you for what? A year, year and a half?”

“Something like that.” 

“...and I still feel like I should know more about you. So show me. There’s no judgemnent unless all your music is about beer and trucks.”

“Damn there goes my library,” I joke. Joel playfully shoves me aside. Having Joel in my room the other night was terrifying, because seeing my art is like seeing a piece of myself that I’m not so open about to everyone. In a way, the same thing applies to the music I listen to. Every time my dad would ask me to fill the silence in the car, or every time I had to turn the volume down in class, I felt like I was hiding myself. I don’t want to be that way for Joel anymore, nothing about him makes me think he’d judge me for these things.

So my heart doesn’t pound when I take my phone out again and begin from the first track of my favourite album. Then, I lay down again and allow the music to play over the wind. I’m starting to wonder if the alcohol is the only reason for the way I feel right now, the steady beat of my heart and the elation. Am I just drunk, or is this the way Joel makes me feel? The thought of walking through the woods and the empty streets of Matlock Beach, of playing video games and laying on the warm sand with him all fill my head, and I look at him. If Joel was kicked out of his house tonight, what’s he going to do? If he loses everything, he needs to have something left to fall back on, like how I do with my paintings. In the periods of my life where my art came to a halt, when I couldn’t bring myself to pick up a pencil I can recall as some of the darkest times in my life, but he doesn’t have that. Everyone needs to have that one thing they can fight for.

The opening guitar begins, Joel’s left hand limply mimics the chords.

“You play, right?” I ask.

“Huh?”

“I saw that guitar in your room once, do you play it?”

“Not so much anymore, my old man gave it to me years ago, but I learnt what I know on my own. You can imagine how that’s gone. Maybe if my tiny hands had a ukulele or somethin’ I’d stand a chance.”

“Maybe you could play something for me sometime?”

“Got nothin’ to play.”

“Well, why don’t you make something then?”

Joel laughs, “I couldn’t do that, don’t got enough brain cells to write anything.”

“You’re not an idiot, you know. You could write something amazing if you gave it a real shot. Or you could scribble down a bunch of words that don’t make any sense. It’s not like music has rules.”

“Seems like a waste of time.”

“You know, I’ve drawn and painted for almost my entire life. At first I wanted to draw superheroes, monsters, and cartoons, but then I grew up and realized the world sucks complete ass. Maybe this’ll surprise you, but I’m fully aware how everything's absolute dogshit all the time. I used to just sit in my room every single day and let it crush me. Then I turned all the shit I felt into paintings, I took bad feelings and I used them to make good things, and it’ll never make the problems go away, but it can lift the weight off just a little bit every day.”

 Joel dangles his legs over the edge of the lighthouse, ”But what’s the point.” “The point is that when I make something that looks beautiful, it makes me feel like my life has a point. I can release my emotions instead of letting them fester inside me forever.”

He leans into the bars of the railing and sighs, “scribbling some words onto a paper ain’t gonna make my life make any sense. Thanks, I’ll think about it.”

I lay down onto the cold ground, since my head is beginning to ache again. Joel does the same, slowly and shakily. I forgot all about the possibility of broken bones, but judging by his ability to climb all the way up here, I have to assume he’s going to survive. “Just try it, okay? For me?”

“Okay,” he replies.

The two of us lay in silence for a few seconds, staring at the milky way above. But my eyes trail back a little, up to the top of the lighthouse. Right above our heads this whole time has been graffiti in bright red, depicting three words. I point it out to Joel right away, but he just rolls his eyes.

“That’s what was written in that tunnel, and in the caves underground,” I note. 

“So? Those words are everywhere.”

“What do you mean?”

Joel chuckles, “You wanna hear somethin’ crazy?”

“Always,” I reply enthusiastically.

“Those three words follow me everywhere I go, since I was a baby. Not just around town neither. They’re all over my house, written on my phone, written on the ceilings on my parents house an’ the condensation in the bathroom mirror when I wake up. Hell, they were the last thing my grand dad ever said to me, but I hadn’t mentioned it to him before. I told you I thought supernatural junk was nonsense, but that’s the closest I got to ever believin’.”

Joel pauses for a few seconds before he realizes I’m staring at him with wide eyes.

“Hey Joel?”

“Yeah?”

“You wanna hear something even crazier?”

So I explain everything that happened. All the glowing eyes I’d seen since Mateo disappeared, the words, “HOURS TO HOURS” written over ever surface of the cave, in the history book we found down there, the monster that attacked me last night.

“It was whispering those words to me while it dragged me away. It took Mateo, it tried to kill me, and it might be responsible for what’s happening to you too.”

“That’s why you’ve been on edge lately, lookin’ behind everywhere you go.”

“Exactly. There isn’t a killer in Matlock, there’s some… alien, or monster, or something, that’s taking people.”

Now that we’re sitting up for my rambling tale, Joel looks away, quiet.

“Look, I know it’s crazy,” I put my hands down, after waving them around in the air for my story, “but I swear that something is happening here that neither of us can explain, I know I’m crazy, I-”

“I believe you,” Joel states matter-of-factly.

I pause, my mouth agape, “You what?”

“Every word.”

“Why?”

“Whadda ya mean why?”

“Is that not completely insane?”

“It is, but you aren’t. I know you’re not a lunatic, or a liar.”

“What?” I ask again in disbelief. There’s no way he could actually believe all of that with no problem, right? 

“Ya’know Miles,” he intertwines his fingers behind his head, taking in the blanket of stars above us, “I’m glad I got to meet you.”

I gaze with him, “So am I, but-”

“You should think about this more when you’re sober.”

“Yeah, yeah that’s probably right.”

It’s strange, the combination of Joel’s wavy brown hair lit by the moon, the way it blows in the wind and the sad smile on his pale lips. Strange the way its making my chest flutter, which is a feeling no other crazy event tonight has made me feel. It’s good, but also a bit frightening, which is weird in of itself, because after last night I thought nothing would scare me anymore. Why am I so nervous?

It’s like beer pong, kind of. It was something I had never really thought about trying. Not because I didn’t want to try it, but because I never really thought I could. If I learned anything tonight, it’s that literally anything can happen, and why should I hold myself back when there might not even be a tomorrow to try again?

While looking into Joel’s eyes, I place my hand on his shoulder to lean in and kiss him.

He lurches back as if my mouth gave him an electric shock, eyes gaping wide, then he laughs a little, and resumes his relaxed position.

Wait, no, that was a horrible, horrible idea. “I-I’m so sorry, that was so not cool,” I run my fingers though my hair anxiously. Oh my god, what the hell was I thinking?”

“Chill, man. It’s alright, you’re just drunk.”

“No, no no that-”

“It’s okay, really. I promise,” He laughs like it’s no big deal,  “Why don’t ya lay down?”

I turn my body to face away from Joel so he can’t see the blood rushing though my face, and my eyes shut to the cawing of a crow as the distant waves on Matlock Beach sing me to sleep.

Fuck.

[georgiapeach30513]

Born For Leaving

Summary: Jake finally comes back, only to leave

Pairings: Jake Jensen X Reader

Rating: explicit

Warnings:  explicit language, explicit sexual content, smut, unprotected sex, a bit of D/s dynamics, creampie, 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 1.1K

Jake Jensen Masterlist

It was a normal day. Waking up to the annoying alarm making your morning smoothie, and ignoring the world for a moment. Sitting down and flipping through your phone. Boring. Monotonous. Everyday. Day in. Day out.

“You’re becoming a bit too routine,” his voice almost singsongs as he walks into the kitchen.

You gasp, unbelieving that’s it’s actually Jake, until he holds his arms out wide. “Did you miss me?”

“Always,” you screech running towards him to jump in his arms. Your face buries in his neck, and you tell yourself, you’re not going to cry. Every time he returns, he always spends too much time trying to calm you back down.

“Jellybean,” he coos as soon as he hears that first sniffle. “Hey, I’m right here.”

“For now,” you grouse. Knowing that it wouldn’t be for long. It never is.

“Bean,” he pries you off of his neck and looks at your face. “Can we not do this? I always come back to you,” he carries you over to the couch. Sitting down, he gazes over your face.

His finger painting your features just like every time before. Reminding you that he is memorizing every inch of you. He does always come back, but you fear there will come a day, that he won’t. And you may never know, what happened to him.

“Hey,” taking his nose, he rubs it on your face, adding in little sniffs until you’re giggling. Moving your hands to cup his cheek, and you just want to melt on him. “I knew I could get you laughing. What’s on the agenda, Jellybean?”

“Can I not just look at you?” Jake takes a quick breath in, exhaling in a chuckle, shaking his head no. “Why not?”

“Because,” his voice groans, and he leans forward to nip around your neck playfully, adding in a few snorts until both of you are in a fit of laughter.

“You never answered,” you give him a quick shove to his shoulder, but his face turns serious. His hands rubbing up and down your thighs, and he pulls you closer to him. “Jakey, you’re leaving a girl hanging.”

Jake slots his lips against yours, pushing his tongue into your mouth, and gripping tightly to the spheres of your ass. Causing a slow grind over his crotch. You swallow every bit of his sweet beautiful sounds; savoring his taste.

“Bean, I…” he tries to speak over you kisses, and you pull back to watch his panting self. Whimpering at the loss of you.

“Jake, what is it?”

“I just want you,” you pet softly over his hair. Too often in front of people he tries to be cool, but this is the Jake you love. Needy and almost begging for your body. “Please. Don’t hate me until I leave.”

“First,” you start getting the sweetest whine from him. You pull off his shirt, tickling your fingers over his chest, and he hurriedly removes your own night shirt. Sighing when your only there in a pair of his boxers.

Leaning forward, he tries to attach his mouth to your tit, but you pull him up by his chin, demanding his attention, “Eh eh eh, I was about to say something.”

“Sorry.”

“There’s a sweet boy. Promise me, one day you’re not gonna leave.”

“Do you think I want to? I have a job to do. Forget about that,” completely wrecked at having you so close yet so far away, he backs you far enough away from him to free his aching cock. Pretty and angry, ready for your wet warmth. His thick hands go to ripping off those boxers, before allowing you to sink over him.

“You look like you’ve had a bad day,” Jake moans up at you. Those hands hold on tight to your hips, “Wanna take it out on me.”

“Oh I will, you big brat,” you give a few bounces over him. Keeping your eyes on his face as it turns to pure pleasure printing all over him. His mouth going slack, but those pretty eyes stay on you, and what you’re doing to his body.

Not even stopping your motions when he lets out a yelp, gripping you even tighter.

“Do I turn you on this much, Jakey?” he actually gives a quick glare up at you, and you smile. Watching Jake become mush at your movements. Making your reunion so much more bittersweet. They’re never long enough. And he’s being taken away from you again.

“Say it, Jake.”

He opens his mouth only to stop, and those hands start using you to fuck himself. “Jake, tell me.”

“You know I do,” his voice hoarse and raspy, and it makes him that much sweeter.

“I wanna hear it!”

“Fuck,” he grunts, slamming your body up and down his length. Your tummy feeling up with heat up. Getting right to the precipice of cumming, and you can feel the pretty cock of his twitch deep inside of you. Screaming out your name like a prayer, “I love you!”

“I love you, too,” you respond. Cumming hard over him, and you feel his heat fill you up. Ropes of his hot seed

“The only thing I want hard when we’re together is your dick. Do not be afraid to tell me how you feel.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t leave me,” you give him a pout and he just holds your used body up against his own. Resting your chin on his shoulder.

“I don’t want to.”

“Jensen,” Clay whispers into your bedroom. “Jensen,” he repeats a bit louder. Thankfully getting an answer when Jake stirs awake. “It’s time to go.”

“She’s sleeping.”

“It’s a quick mission,” Clay promises. But Jake never believes him. “Come on. I’ll wait in the car.”

Jake sits up, stretching his whole body, before leaning over you. Giving you a sweet kiss before leaving his shirt with you. Taking the one you had been wearing in its place. He writes you a pitiful little note, hoping that you forgive him. Promising that one day, he won’t have to leave.

He catches a glimpse of the new shine that rests on your finger, and it makes it harder for him to leave. “I love you. Don’t forget me.”

You couldn’t even if you tried. And you don’t want to. So for now, you hope that one day comes sooner rather than later. Hoping that he’ll always come back to you. But remembering that no matter what, he was born for leaving.

Masterlist

Taglist: @tis-thedamn-season @marveloustaylortot @pono-pura-vida @duuhrayliegh @rebekahdawkins @johndeaconshands @harrysthiccthighss @donutloverxo @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @peaches1958

[egcdeath]

finders keepers

summary: did captain america just steal your cat?

pairing: steve rogers x reader

word count: 2.5k

warnings: tooth rotting fluff, strangers to lovers

author’s note: it’s been way too long since i wrote some pure, self indulgent fluff. this has been quite the refreshing experience for me but i think it’s back to our regularly scheduled program after this ;)

you can find my masterlist and taglist here

Miso had an air of arrogance that you admired. She took the world by its kitty balls, doing whatever she pleased whenever she pleased. Your cat left the apartment for sometimes days at a time, and frequently led male cats to your door. To you, your cat was more like a roommate than a pet, hogging up most of your bed, standing on the counter while you attempted to make food for yourself, and leaving most areas dirtier than she originally found it. 

Okay, maybe you were personifying your cat a little too much. But after moving out to D.C., you were unspeakably lonely. Most days, it felt like Miso was all you had, and that you were all Miso had (save for her army of cat boyfriends). 

This made things all the more concerning for you when you’d realized that you hadn’t seen your cat companion in five days. Five whole days without the comforting vibration of her purr, her ungodly hours of wakeup calls demanding to be played with, or pet. The cherry on top was that the cat food outside your door appeared to be completely untouched.

In your frenzied realization of your missing cat, your mind raced with a thousand different terrible situations your dear Miso could’ve found herself in. You frantically clicked through pictures of her on an online album and attempted to find a photo that would capture her white fur with large blobs of auburn, and her vibrant blue eyes to put on your ‘MISSING’ sign. The longer you clicked, the more that you began to worry that she had been caught and kidnapped by some terrible person with bad intentions. 

You finally threw together the poster, sending it to your phone so that you could print it off at the OfficeMax down the street. Luckily for you, you didn’t make it that far, as the moment you began to lock the closed door of your apartment, you saw the unmistakable figure of your cat. 

In the arms of your neighbor.

Now, you’d never met Steve. He was an Avenger, Captain America to be exact, and you were just… you. You’d convinced yourself that attempting to introduce yourself to him would ultimately end in failure, and an embarrassing one at that. Maybe he’d scoff and walk away, or call Tony Stark in front of you and tell him about the crazy woman he just encountered. 

But none of that mattered. Captain America was stealing your fucking cat. 

“Excuse me, sir?” You asked, stepping away from your door and approaching the Greek God of a man to the right of you. 

“Oh, hey! We must be n-“

“You have my cat,” you said bluntly.

“I’m sorry, what?” Steve seemed to do a double take

“My cat, y’know, the feline in your arms.”

“Well, maybe we just have similar looking cats. This is Arabella.”

You nearly scoffed at this, shaking your head. First, Captain America kidnapped your cat, and now he’s trying to convince you that it’s not your cat? Yeah, you’d know Miso from a mile away. And what kind of name is Arabella?

“Arabella is a great name for her,” Steve retorted, pulling the cat closer to his chest. Shit, did you say that out loud?

“Well I think it’s time for Miso to come back home,” the cat’s ears perked at this, and she glanced over at you. The sight of you made her wiggle and hop out of Steve’s tight embrace, landing on her feet and trotting over to you. The damn cat rubbed her face against your calf and purred as if she hadn’t been cheating on you for long enough to have gained a new name.

You squatted down and rubbed the back of your hand against her cheek, and shook your head at your pet, “you’re getting put on probation, young lady.” 

She didn’t seem to mind, pacing back and forth around you. You glanced up and saw Steve with a rather neutral expression on his face, as if he was masking whatever it was that he was feeling.

“I’m sorry about that, ma’am. Uh, maybe I’ll see you both around sometime,” disappointment coated his every word before he opened up his apartment door and promptly closed it behind him. 

You were surprised at how quickly he conceded, but you weren’t particularly mad about it either. You weren’t sure what you’d do if you never got your Miso back.

——

A whole day later, you’d been in your apartment typing up an email when a soft rapping at your door got your attention.

“Just a second!” you called, hopping up and hurrying to the door. When you opened it, Steve was standing in front of you, waiting with an oversized box in his hands.

“These are some of Ar- Miso?” he trailed off, waiting for you to confirm the name, and you gave him a tiny nod. “These are some of Miso’s toys. I just figured if she’s not staying at my place anymore…”

As if on cue, Miso strolled up to the door, and stretched her arms up on Steve’s leg, begging to be picked up. The man glanced at you for approval, and you gave a dismissive shrug before he set down the box, and held up the cat.

Steve frowned as he held her, and frankly, it pulled on your heart strings. You had to remind yourself that this man had been holding your cat captive for at least a week, and at most… who knows. 

She clearly had a connection with him, and that was what intrigued you most. Miso was a very picky cat, and it was only occasionally that she found someone that she genuinely liked, let alone wanted to be picked up by. If you continued to watch the display of affection in front of you, you might just cave.

“Uh, I left something in the oven for a little too long, so I should probably go get that. Thanks for stopping by.”

Steve nodded, understanding that it was time for him to exit.

——

You should’ve seen this coming the minute Miso was back in your home. You stepped out of the shower one morning to find your front door slightly ajar, and your animal nowhere to be found. 

You huffed, frustrated that just three days after you told yourself that your cat was completely indoor from that point on, she had escaped. She could literally be anywhere at this point.

In a whirlwind, you threw on a sweatshirt and pants, ready to go print out the missing posters that you had designed just a few days ago. As you slipped on sneakers, you realized something very crucial. She might just be at Steve’s place.

You groaned aloud, rubbing your temple as you thought of how difficult your cat was being. You were becoming a bit nervous to approach Steve, you hadn’t gotten off to the greatest start, and if your cat wasn’t there, things might just be awkward.

Regardless, you knew you needed to try, so you exited your own home, and knocked on the door of Steve’s.

A few moments later, he appeared with your cat in tow. 

“Hey!” he paused and trailed off, “I never got your name before.”

“That’s what you care about right now?” you glanced down at your animal. “It’s Y/N, by the way.”

“Hi, Y/N. Miso and I were just enjoying breakfast, if you’d like to join us?”

Was Steve shooting his shot? 

“I appreciate your offer, but I think I’m alright. I have to get back to work, and my cat is still in your custody,” your eyes flickered down to the animal who stood proudly by his side. 

“Maybe some other time,” he shrugged. “You work from home?”

You nodded, then squatted down to get eye level with your cat. 

“I’m jealous,” he chuckled. “Alright, I’ll stop bothering you now. Bye Miso, see you around, Y/N.”

You picked up your cat, who briefly dug her nails into the ground in resistance before submitting to her capture. As you brought her back home, you couldn’t help but wonder if you’d made the right choice.

——

Ever since you’d discovered Miso, or Arabella’s secret life, it’s like you couldn’t stop noticing her connection to Steve. 

Some days, she’d be gone until the dead of night, when she’d meow and paw at your front door until you woke up. Other times she’d be laying in bed with you, and she smelled distinctly of your neighbor. Your cat had single handedly turned a stranger into a thoroughly integrated part of your life.

It was as if Miso was now your child, and Steve your ex-husband in a Cold War style custody battle, where Miso seemed to prefer her father. It was slightly disheartening. At the very least, you knew she was in good hands. 

You held a throw pillow to your chest while you watched a rerun of a sitcom on your television, procrastinating in your work for as long as you possibly could. The sound of a knock on your door pulled you from your trance, and as you peeked through the peephole of your door, you saw a slightly distorted Steve.

Opening up the door, you gave him just the faintest hint of a smile, “what’s up, neighbor? Need me to grab you some treats for Arabella, or something?”

“Kinda the opposite,” he gestured with his head down to the cat squirming in his hands. “I’m gonna be gone on a mission for the next week or so. I just wanted to let you know that if Miso gets out, she’s not with me.” 

Steve set her down on your carpet, and she happily collapsed at your feet, “keep her safe for me, alright?” 

——

You took a deep breath as you approached his door, hoping he hadn’t left just yet. You fiddled with the sticky note containing your number, and polaroid photo of your cat in your hand, considering turning around and scrapping the idea all together. 

It was silly to think that an Avenger would ever bother reaching out to you. You were probably overstepping anyway. Steve would think you were a freak and take full custody of your beloved Miso once and for all. 

Going against your better judgment, you set down the polaroid-note combo and quickly slid it under Steve’s door. Whatever happened happened.

The next morning, you were pleased to receive a notification from an unknown number. 

Send Miso pics?

You were more than happy to oblige. 

——

Over the course of Steve’s week-long mission, you’d sent several pictures and videos of your cat doing random things. Trying to get on the table, sleeping on top of your dryer, and even playing with one of the toys Steve provided.

Surprisingly, Steve wasn’t as dry of a texter as you thought he’d be. He was eating up all of the Miso content, and would occasionally even ask for you to send more photos. 

The final night of his mission, you were surprised when you received a FaceTime request, at first writing it off as a technical error (he was from a different time period, after all), but the follow up call demonstrated his intentions.

You cautiously picked up, the knot in your stomach growing as you did so, “hello?”

“Hi!” Steve greeted optimistically, the phone just a bit too close to his face. “Any Miso sightings?”

“Yeah, she’s actually sleeping on my foot right now,” you chuckled, flipping the camera so you could show her off in your dim, lamp-lit bedroom. 

“So cute,” he hummed, “how have you been?”

“Me?” you laughed quietly, “I’m not the one on a top secret mission in god-knows-where. But I’ve been fine. How are you?”

“Honestly? I’m pretty tired. Kinda can’t wait to get home and see you and Miso,” he said in a quieter voice. 

Your brain stalled out for a second. Steve was excited to see you? You hoped that you were reading this the right way, as you were more than willing to go with whatever it was that Steve was putting down.

“We’ll be expecting an immediate visit from you, then. I’ll let Miso know that she needs to start kneading a bread loaf for you as soon as possible. Any idea of what time you’re getting into D.C.?” 

“Probably late morning, but it really depends on when Natasha gets up.”

You had a moment where you realized that you were talking to a real life superhero, and he had just referenced his friend… who was also a superhero. You paused for a second. 

“Y/N? Hey, you still here?”

“Yeah! Yeah. I just zoned out for a sec. Well, you better get here safe or else someone is going to be very annoyed with you.”

Steve laughed softly across the line, and you adjusted yourself in bed, yawning softly.

“I’m sorry, I forgot how late it is over there,” Steve apologized.

“Don’t worry, I was up anyway. One of Miso’s boyfriends is pretty upset that he can’t come in here and spend the night with her.”

“Which one?”

“I think that grey one. I don’t really know what his voice sounds like, but she’s been leading him on lately,” you responded, eliciting a laugh from both you and Steve. 

“Try to get some sleep, okay? I don’t need you snoozing while I come to visit our girl.”

“You are something else, Steve Rogers,” you said fondly, adjusting your phone one last time as you hugged a pillow. “I’ll get to sleep. See you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow. Sweet dreams, Y/N.”

You hung up, and cuddled into your pillow with a sigh. Calling your dreams that night sweet was an understatement. 

——

You seemed to be Steve’s first stop after his mission, stopping at your door with his duffel bag still attached to his arm, and wearing a slightly dirty and much too small white t-shirt.

Expecting his presence, you quickly got the door and gave him a toothy grin. 

“It’s so good to see your face without a screen,” Steve commented. Internally, you swooned. 

“I could say the same for you, Steve.”

Miso had been summoned by the sound of Steve’s voice, practically sprinting to the door and meowing at him on the top of her lungs. 

“Miso really appreciates you coming here to see her first,” you added as he lifted her up and quietly cooed into her wrinkly head. “Feel free to take her for the next few days. I’m sure she’s getting tired of me.”

Steve shook his head at you, and grinned, “that’s so sweet of you,” he briefly looked down at his wristwatch, and his brows raised.

“Shit. I have to go, but I promise to see you soon. I’m glad to see that everything is well. Take care, Y/N,” Steve began making his way back to his own apartment, and you watched him with the semblance of a frown. 

You really needed to stop longing for the unobtainable. 

——

You hadn’t heard from Steve in a few days following his return, and your brief interaction with him. Part of you wondered if he was avoiding you for some  reason. 

Your phone lit up the room as it went off, and you grabbed it to look at the notification you received.

A picture of Steve grinning with Miso sitting on his chest looked back at you with a simple message connected to it.

Wanna come over? :D

[bokuroskitten]

𝔚𝔥𝔞𝔱’𝔰 𝔲𝔫𝔡𝔢𝔯 𝔶𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔰𝔎𝔦𝔯𝔱?

〈you really didn’t mind being the nanny for Daichi’s kids, not when it came with perks.

✮ genre: NSFW 18+ (MINORS DNI)

✮ warnings: Dilf Daichi, daddy kink (daddy title used), age gap, use of handcuffs, spanking, oral (m! receiving), face fucking, creampie, slight breeding kink, cockwarming, spit <3

✮ word count: 2.8

❦ shout out to dilf Daichi, who takes up all the space in my brain

❦ huge thank you to @ohno-otome @oneblonded @rosesandtoshi who took their time to beta this for me, please give them love and appreciation.

“You little slut. What if my kids had seen huh? The fact that you’re not wearing any panties under this little skirt?”

“I’m sure they didn’t notice, but you sure did, huh Daddy?”

You were a cheeky little thing, that was for sure. Daichi had never expected this sort of outcome, not with you, the sweet university babysitter he hired. But there you were, asking for it with that shit-eating grin on your face.

It had been just Daichi and his kids for quite some time, him and the three munchkins. Mom didn’t stick around when she fell for her boss. A businessman, much older and much richer. Daichi had gotten over it, as best as he could. He had all he needed with his kids, who were always full of contagious happiness. But it was tough, being a single dad and working as a full-time cop. When the night shifts started to roll around Daichi took it upon himself to find a suitable nanny.

Which was how the two of you met. You were in university and desperately needed the extra money for the looming student debt. Looking for jobs wasn’t the easiest thing, but what was easy was saying yes to Daichi’s offer. He was willing to pay you more than minimum wage for nights, even offered you the spare room if things got too late or you had class early the next morning. Plus his kids were angels. They got along with you almost instantly, clinging to your legs or begging you to stay longer than your allotted shift time.

Plus, Daichi himself was nice to look at, but you tried your best not to focus on that point.

You had been working for Daichi for a while now, it was almost routine for you to attend volleyball practices, dance recitals, or even just dinner picnics. The kids loved having you around, and all Daichi wanted to do was to see them happy. But that’s when he noticed it, the one day the family had gone to the park. You held the hands of his two youngest, while his oldest showed off the bug he had found hiding in a nearby bush.

It was the way you smiled at them, the way you squeezed the girl's hands a little tighter when they cringed at the bug. The way you bent at the knees to take a better look, and the way your pretty summer dress had risen up just enough for Daichi to sneak a peek at the cotton panties hidden underneath.

Daichi wasn’t blind. In fact, it had been a long time since he indulged himself in a partner. Never enough time, or never willing to bring them home to the kids. But you, you already got along with his babies so well. You took your time to take care of them, even take care of Daichi when you could. Cleaned the house before he got home, ironed his uniform on his night shifts, even brought him coffee when he had early mornings.

So that’s how his glances turned into stares, his roaming eyes turned into winks. The hugs you shared lasted a little longer, the hand he would place on your back would slide a little lower.

He could still remember the very first move he had made. You had fallen asleep on the couch, curled up in one of his sweaters. The kids were put to bed long before, but you always waited for Daichi to return before taking your leave. He had leaned in close, allowing his lips to brush over your forehead. The gentle motion had caused you to stir, tired eyes lazily blinking open to be met with honey brown.

“Why don’t you sleep here tonight?” Daichi had murmured, staying close considering you didn’t push him away. You on the other hand felt your heart beating hard against your ribcage, the smell of his familiar cologne making you feel a bit dizzy. The feeling of sleep slowly faded, replaced with the hazy feeling of need.

Need for him, for anything and everything as long as it was him.

“Can I sleep with you?” It had slipped out of your lips before you could stop yourself. You panicked for a moment seeing his shocked expression, ready to blame it on the tiredness. But there was no need when he pressed his lips against yours when he scooped you off the couch and easily hauled you up into his bedroom.

That was only the beginning. The two of you found yourself kissing in the bathroom while the kids played outside, Daichi having you warm his cock during family movie night. The first time you had whimpered out Daddy while he had you bent over his lap was still engraved in his brain. The longer the affair went on, the more playful and lust-filled it became.

So that's how the two of you ended up here, now.

Daichi had you pinned against the counter now, palm pressed against your head to keep you down while his palm slowly rose up your thigh. He groaned when his fingers slipped under the short hem of your skirt, reaching the swell of your ass only to find no panties there.

“Course I noticed, with how you were bending over all over the place, anyone coulda seen this slutty little ass.” His words were husky, pushed out between gritted teeth as he squeezed the plump skin of your ass. You whined at him, face flushed as your hips wiggled into his palm.

That only made him strike down on your skin, his palm open as the spank clapped throughout the room. “Slutty girls don’t get to be greedy like that. I think I need to put you in your place, is that it? Have you lost all your manners, baby?”

You tried to shake your head, nod, do anything. But your brain was already foggy as Daichi brought down another spank, making the skin of your ass pulse. “Want your cock, Daddy.”

“Oh, yeah? And your way of asking was prancing around with no panties on?” The third slap was the hardest, and this time on your bare flesh. He had bunched your skirt up at your waist, making you jolt from the sudden slap to your skin. His hand print was already forming when he rubbed the cheek, a low hum leaving his chest.

“You’re just like the kids huh? Thinking you can get away with anything if you’re cute enough. Not in this house. You should know that by now baby.” His voice sent shivers all the way down to your cunt, the wetness already threatening to dribble down your thighs. “Hands behind your back.”

You tried to question him, but the fourth spank had you yelping, reminding you that his words were a command and not a request. You felt the cold metal click around both your wrists, a blush rising on your cheeks when you tried to pull your hands away only to find them stuck in place.

“Daddy’s gonna teach his pretty baby what happens to bad little girls looking for attention.”

You were hauled over his shoulder before you even had a chance to complain. Daichi had no problem carrying your squirming body up the stairs, your whines and complaints falling upon deaf ears. When he closed the door to his bedroom he put you on the ground, which only made you whine more as he approached the bed without you.

“Daddy—“

“Get over here.” He explained calmly. His muscles were tense, but his face showed no emotion as he sat on the edge of his bed. When you made no move he rose an expectant brow. “We don’t have all day, would you rather I fuck my fist—“

“No!”

Interrupting him, another act of disobedience that made his brow twitch in distaste. “Get over here.” He repeated, this time his voice a bit deeper, more serious.

You didn’t waste another second, scrambling over on your knees. It was difficult with your hands cuffed, but you made it between his thighs. You were about to press kisses against his thighs before you felt him grab a handful of hair at the nape of your neck. When he cranked your head back you yelped, shoulders slouching at the look he gave you.

Cold.

“Open your mouth.” There was no hesitation this time when your trembling lower lip opened up, tongue poking out. Daichi tsked, grabbing the end of your tongue and pulling it out further. Tears pricked your eyes at the action, drool uncontrollably slipping out of your mouth.

“Being shy now, are we? How can you act so modest when you aren’t even wearing panties.” He spat a wad of saliva on your tongue, his lips twitching in a grin as he watched your eyes flutter, a little mewl leaving your hung lips. He slowly released your tongue but kept his grip on your hair tight. “Don’t swallow. Keep that tongue out.”

You were trembling a bit, trying your best to keep your excitement at bay and hold his spit on your tongue as he unbuckled his slacks. He pulled the belt out in one smooth motion, pulling the material far enough down that his cock could spring free. When it slapped back against his abs, you clenched your thighs together tightly.

He wasted no more time guiding your head onto his cock, pressing it down until your throat bulged, until you gagged, until your nose was nestled in his trimmed pubic hair.

“Now, I’m gonna have to wash this filthy mouth out. Fuck some manners into your throat huh?”

He thrust into your throat without pause, his hand continuing to hold you steady as he fucked into your mouth. The tears were already spilling from your eyes, drool freely bubbling past stretched lips as Daichi used your mouth as he saw fit. He pulled out just until his tip stayed lodged between your lips, groaning at the way you desperately tried to suck in air through your nose. You were already coming undone, and it was so beautiful to watch.

“Crying over a little punishment? You’re such a little bitch.” He waited until you began suckling on his tip, attempting to whine around it before pumping it into your mouth again. He kept one hand against your throat, pupils dilating in feral desire every time he felt it bulge under his fingertips. He didn’t last with a pace like this, his hips stuttering when his release wracked over him hard.

“Swallow every fucking drop, you’re gonna need it to wash out that mouth.” He grunted, holding your face down as ropes of hot cum slipped from his pulsing tip. You shook around his dick, throat clenching so desperately as the hot, sticky substance slid down your throat, feeling warm all the way down into your belly.

Daichi pulled out with a pop, one that had you sucking in a shaky breath. When you blinked the remaining tears from your lashes you lulled your tongue out, showing him a clean surface that had him humming in approval.

“Looks like you are good for something, huh, taking all my cum down your throat.”

Using the grip in your hair he easily hauled you to your feet, watching the way you stumbled face-first into the mattress. Your face was a mess of spit and drool as you looked up at him over your shoulder, hips rutting into his soft sheets. “D-Daddy...”

“D-d-daddy” He mimicked, flipping your skirt up and tucking the hem in at the waist. He wasted no time grabbing your hips, pulling them up for a better angle. “You’re a big girl, use your words.”

You had to compose yourself, mind already going blank as he simply spread your ass apart, getting a better look at your arousal. “C-Can you fuck me please? Need your cock Daddy..”

“Now if you had just asked me like that before, none of this woulda happened Angel...” He sighed it out, two fingers slowly sliding up your puffy slit to collect your slick. He rubbed it along his cock, even though it was already lubed up with your spit. “I don’t like when you misbehave you know that baby girl.”

His voice had already gotten softer, making your cunt flutter around nothing. When he pressed an open-mouthed kiss to your clit you mewled, nails digging into your palms as the cuffs clinked around your trembling wrists. “Gunna say sorry to me hm? Wanna hear you say it nice and pretty.”

“Sorry Daddy, M’sorry” it spilled from your lips, words slightly muffled by the sheets as he rubbed his tip over your slit. “Won’t do it again Daddy, just wanna make you happy, want your cock.”

“I know sweetheart, you’re such a good girl for me, even when you decide to be a little cheeky.”

He began to press into you, slow and steady. He wanted to feel all your little dips, all the bumps and spongy spots he loved so dearly as he bottomed out within you. Your mouth hung open in a little ‘o’, back arching so his tip could tap against your cervix when he finally bottomed out. “Fuck, love this perfect little cunt, still squeezes me like the first time.” He growled out, fingers reaching for the cuffs. He gripped them tightly, used them as leverage for when he began to fuck into you.

It was slow and deep, each thrust meant to press his tip into your sweet spot. The pace had your eyes rolling back, babbles spilling out of your hung lips in a dumb little mantra. It didn’t even make sense, Daichi knew that, but he just loved to hear you. Loved hearing you whimper and ramble about how you loved his cock, about how daddy’s cock felt so good, about how you wanted to be no ones but his.

“My good little girl, takin' my cock so well. Gunna fuck a baby in here one day, would you like that Angel? Wanna be the mommy to my beautiful kids and our own?”

That had you squeezing his cock, a low groan vibrating in his chest as he picked up his pace. The slap of his hips against your ass echoed in the room, your cries of delight being muffled into the sheets. Using his grip on the cuffs he yanked you forward until your back was pressed into his chest. He stuffed two fingers between your lips, having you both moan in unison.

“Keep milkin' my cock just like that baby girl, gunna fill this little cunt and then fuck right back into it so we don’t lose a single drop.” You babbled a ‘yes daddy’ around his fingers, head lulled onto his shoulder as he thrust into your cunt. It was pulsing around him, building up a pool of arousal in your abdomen that was so close to snapping. When his free hand snaked to your clit, rubbing deep circles into it had you sobbing, hips humping frantically to meet his thrusts and chase your release.

“That’s it...” Daichi murmured by your ear, his breath thick and hot as he snapped into your ass. His finger slid from your mouth instead, only to grip your pretty throat. “Cum sweetheart, cum on my cock yea? Wanna feel you cream on me.”

And you did just that, with a silent scream and a jolt of your body finishing around his cock. That final squeeze of your cunt around him had Daichi moaning, his thrusts messy and uncoordinated as his own high ripped through him. His balls twitched as he emptied another load in you, hot cum making goosebumps form all over your skin. He slowed his thrusts, his fingers pressing light taps into your clit now as you rode out the high together. He watched as his cock got coated in a white sheen, the shine of your mixed arousal making him bite his lower lip.

“What a good girl...” He huffed. He reached between you two to release the safety from the handcuffs, allowing them to fall to the bed with a clank. He was gentle as he laid the two of you down, a mess of limbs and sweat as he stayed balls deep in your cunt.

“Gunna stay just like this. Keep you nice and plugged.” He reassured, one palm smoothing over your tummy as he pressed kisses into your shoulder. “At least until the kids wake back up, gotta make sure Daddy’s cum stays inside, isn’t that right baby?”

“Right Daddy,” you murmured out, blissed and fucked out. You could have fallen asleep, just like that with his dick still buried inside. But you knew the kids would be up in thirty minutes from their naps, so you’d enjoy this time while you could, being full.

[highdramas]

the billboard said the end is near | b.b.

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝'𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞 | 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader

warnings: language, possible tfatws spoilers, canon typical violence, bucky is soft and loves his doll and will do anything to keep her safe

word count: 2184

summary: bucky is protective over what has given him solace.

note: here's tawlb part 4! you don’t have to read these in order, they stand independently, but they do all work together! PLEASE leave feedback/reblog! this is extremely helpful for me writing future parts to know what everyone likes or doesn’t like!

enjoy! <3

chaos has always controlled your life.

in all of the best ways, and all of the worst ones, too. in the best ways, it has allowed you to not take life too seriously. it has allowed you to let things roll off your shoulders and keep your easy breezy demeanor. you like to think that you don’t allow the little things to affect you-- you also note that it’s because the big things have been so all consuming.

who knew that turning to dust for five years would turn your life into such a shit show?

the five years hadn’t felt like five years to you at all. it felt like one day, you had been laying on your couch watching tv, and then five years later you were appearing in someone else’s apartment. all of your things, gone.

you will never forget their screams as they watched you materialize from nothing.

of course, you can’t blame them. and it wasn’t just this apartment. the screams and the chaos broke through the entire building. people busting from doors, crying and scrambling to use their cell phones, to see if this was really happening.

the couple that had moved into your apartment after you dusted had been kind, all things considered. the woman had held you and you could feel her crying and she kept saying do you have family? do you know their numbers?

finally, you couldn’t help yourself. you had asked, “what happened to me?”

“you’ve been gone for five years, honey.”

these sorts of revelations had ruled your life for the months since you came back.

like when you called your boyfriend only to find out that he was engaged.

like when you found out that you certainly didn’t have a job anymore.

like when you found out that you had no apartment, no savings, no anything. nothing left.

it has been over a year since the blip and you are still feeling the repercussions from it. you are still feeling the hurt of having your life upended, you are still feeling the hurt of missing a life that went on without you. it’s hard not to daydream about what could’ve been. what could’ve stayed the same.

then bucky looks at you, and you’re reminded that not all change is bad.

change is hard but you know that he kisses you and it makes your brain fuzzy, he lays you back on your mattress and he stays with you until the sun rises. change is hard but you introduce him as my boyfriend, james to every new person you meet and you watch as he smiles and pride lingers in his eyes and he carefully places his arm around your shoulders. change is hard but he doesn’t wear the gloves around you anymore.

change is hard, but bucky is better than any of it.

he’s been gone more than normal lately.

of course, you understand. and, really, you think it might be good for him. not the fighting-- while you understand the benefit it has for him, the purpose that it gives him, that’s not the thing that you believe serves him best. no, it is sam. it is sam’s family. it is knowing that there are other people out there in the world who are looking at him the same way that you look at him.

okay, maybe not exactly the same.

bucky had sent you a text from that stupid dinky flip phone that morning, saying that he would be home that night. the implications go unsaid.

you and the winter soldier have formed quite the routine-- he has a key to your apartment on his keyring (it’s a disney princess key. it’s the only spare that you had, and the laughter that erupted from you had made him relent in trying to barter for the cat printed key you have). he’s going to let himself in, probably around ten. you’ll already have the chinese takeout spread out on the table. you’ll spread your arms out and do little jazz hands towards the food and you’ll say, “ta-da.”

and you will watch as the tension in his shoulders starts to ease and he sets his duffel bag down in your entryway and he will cross the room to you. his arms will snake around your waist and his face will be buried into the crook of your neck. he will sigh and you will stroke his hair and you will say, “welcome home, buck.”

but now, it is nine. it is nine and you are curled up on your couch and kitty rests in your lap and you feel yourself growing antsy waiting for bucky to come home. she looks up at you and lets out that little trill as you scratch her head and you smile.

the smiling doesn’t last long.

the building that you and bucky live in is not swanky by any means. it was built in the 40s, with creaky floors and ugly carpeted hallways. the walls are thin and you can hear everything-- really, everything. and the shouting and commotion is certainly not typical.

you move to stand just as the door bursts--or explodes, you’re not sure which is the better word-- open. a scream leaves your lips and you hold onto your cat for dear life, scrambling back into your bedroom and clicking the door behind you. your limbs are shaking and you nearly trip over your dresser and your cat nearly claws your arm off.

you hear bucky before you see him.

“you really think i wasn’t gonna find out about this little stunt?” you’ve never heard his voice like this-- so low, so full of absolute rage. “you’re out of your fucking mind.”

the other person is stammering and though you don’t see the blow that bucky lands on their face, you do hear the aftermath. bucky is talking to someone and you finally set your cat down and you hear bucky on the other side of the door. “doll, it’s me.”

you open the door and look at him with a pounding heart and shaking hands. he looks just as shaken, but more than that-- he’s angry. his fists are clenched at his sides. “buck--” you lay a hand on your chest and you try to gain control of your breathing and you can see that he is doing the same. “what happened?”

bucky hesitates. you watch the gears turning in his head, and it makes your head tilt to the side. “bucky, i’m not kidding-- tell me.”

“we were on our way back and sam got a tip from torres that the flag smashers were--” he cringes even at the thought and he shakes his head. “they were going to try and--”

you watch as he struggles to say it, to really say it, and you touch his face. the touch seems to open him up. his hand takes your wrist and he rubs his thumb along the bone. “they wanted to take you as a hostage.”

a hostage.

bucky opens his mouth to say something else as you blink, trying to wrap your mind around the fact that someone wanted to take you as a hostage, but sam interrupts him. “sharon’s got the guy in cuffs downstairs,” he says in your doorway. when you look, you can see that a mess has been made of your living room-- and not the sort of mess that you create. no, it is a mess of destruction and chaos. “i’m gonna head out. call me if you need anything, i’m staying in town.”

bucky nods and you muster up your best smile to sam and then you look at bucky and you say quietly, “can we go to your apartment?”

he nods and you scoop up kitty and you pad down the hall beside him, still in your loungewear and fuzzy socks. you notice that he constantly keeps a hand on you. whether it’s his fingers tangling with yours or his arm around your shoulders or his palm pressed into the small of your back-- you know exactly what it is that he’s doing, and you lean into every touch, hoping that the contact whispers i’m here, i’m here, i’m here, and you are not losing me.

kitty drops to the floor and, surprisingly, it’s bucky that speaks before you do. “you’re gonna move in here. with me.” he stares at you firmly. “i’m gonna make sure that you’re safe. and the safest place you can be is with me.”

you open your mouth to reply but he continues. “i can’t--” you watch the gears in his head turning, the scenarios turning over and over and over again in his mind. “i can’t lose you.”

“buck…” you move over to him and you place your hands on his face. his eyes are fixed on the wall behind your head, and you watch as guilt overcomes him and you can practically hear him saying if i hadn’t been there in time… “bucky, you’re not going to.”

you feel his hands fist into the material of your t shirt and he holds you even closer. “i’ll move in with you,” you finally whisper against the stubble of his jaw. “and not just for safety. because i want to live with you.”

bucky pulls away and he looks at you with a wobbling lip and you shush him. “i’m okay,” you whisper and you lean your forehead on his. “i’m okay, and i’m here, and i’m staying.”

“okay.”

his hand caresses the back of your head and you touch the place where his heart is. you watch his shoulders rise and fall, you watch his eyes flutter shut and you see some of the tension finally seep out of his pores. he opens his eyes at you and he looks so tired.

“i sleep on the floor,” he blurts it as he pulls away slightly. for a moment, it looks like he regrets it, the way that he winces slightly. “i don’t like… i don’t like sleeping in the bed. it’s too… soft. i always slept in your bed when i stayed over because i didn’t want you to wake up and i wasn’t there.”

“bucky…” you lean into every single place that he touches. “i’ll sleep on the floor with you.”

an incredulous sort of laugh leaves bucky as he stares down at you. he shakes his head a bit. “i don’t want you to do that.”

“i don’t care,” you say with a steely resolve and confident defiance, jutting your chin up at him. “because i’m sleeping next to you. tonight, and every night after. i don’t care where. i’ll never care where.”

bucky’s exhale is shaky and broad arms encircle your waist entirely, drawing you in closer and closer. his face presses into your neck, the exact way that you had imagined him coming home to you hours earlier. you can feel his lips pressing into your skin, can feel the sheer need in it. “i don’t deserve you,” every movement of his lips against your neck is entirely felt, sending sparks through your limbs. “i don’t know what i did to get this lucky.”

“shh,” you rake your fingernails down his scalp and you can feel his fingers gripping you tighter. “if you say that stupid shit again, i’ll kill you. you deserve me.” you tap his chin and he fixes his gaze on you. “and i deserve you. we deserve each other. we deserve to be happy. together. and i’m tired of people thinking otherwise.”

bucky finally cracks a smile. “you’re very stubborn.”

“i thought you liked that about me.”

“i love that about you.” he takes a beat. “among other things.”

you bite down on your lip and finally lean up on your tiptoes. “i promise i’ll be a good roommate.”

“that’s bullshit,” he says and his hands find the curve of your waist once more, traveling to your hips. “i’m going to be cleaning up after you every damn day.”

“yeah, probably.” your hand goes to the back of his head. “it will feel safe. staying here.”

bucky’s nose trails up the side of your face. “good.” he presses his lips to your jaw. “i’m sorry about your apartment. that fucker would’ve been dead if you weren’t there.” he grows more serious again. “i would never let anyone get away with anything like that. i will never let it get that far again, doll. i swear to god.”

“bucky,” you breathe. “i know. it’s okay.” you take his hand and you pull a few blankets off his couch, toss down a few pillows. “let’s go to sleep.”

there’s a twinkle in his eye as he watches you shuffle around his apartment, putting together a makeshift bed on the floor. you fluff the pillows before setting them down and you give him a smile that tells him everything is going to be alright.

even though he says you moving in is about keeping you safe… he sleeps that night on the hardwood, holding you, and he feels safer too.

[ragingbookdragon]

The Daughter Of Superman, The Adopted Son Of Batman...What Could Go Wrong? PT. 2

Jason Todd x Kryptonian!Reader One-Shot

Word Count: 2.8K Warnings: Angst

Author's Note: I should really post my other Kryptonian reader story. Enjoy the angst! -Thorne

**********************************************************************

She jerked backwards, eyes widening at the sight of the thick, crimson liquid running down her arm. A shudder ran through her, throat seizing up as she tried to suck in air, her other hand coming up to rub at her arm. Suddenly it was on both hands and she stared at them in horror.

A voice called from below her, pained, but firm. “Superwoman…it’s okay. Don’t—ugh—don’t panic. It’s alright.” The voice was soothing at first, but when she looked down to find its owner, the body next to him took up all she saw, a vicious, gaping hole where his heart used to be.

She peddled backwards, stumbling to the floor, apologies falling from her lips. “I’m sor—I’m so sorry. It was just—he was hurting you and I—I didn’t mean to do this, I swear—”

The boy reached out to her but grunted in pain, hand dropping to hold his side. “(Y/N)—”

Her eyes met his once more, and he could see the tears swimming in her gaze as she whispered, “I’m sorry.” She shot from the ground, disappearing in the sky in a blur of red and blue.

He reached for her calling out, “(Y/N)!” He lost sight of her as quickly as she left, and the other two ran up to him.

“Tim!” The taller boy stopped, looking down at the corpse next to him, jaw dropping in shock. “…Oh my god. Wh—what happened?” He looked at the other. “Tim?”

He shook his head, eyes meeting the shorter one. “Bart, I need you to get to Central and find Wally and Dick and tell them to get to the cave.” Bart nodded and spun, taking off in a flash of yellow lightning.

The other boy knelt, picking him up off the ground. “Tim, what happened?”

He groaned, hand moving to hold his side once more. “(Y/N) killed him on accident.” Tim looked at him. “Conner, I can get back to the tower on my own, but I need someone to get to Jason.” He sucked in a breath, reaching up and wiping the blood from his nose though it still bled despite him. “Kori and Roy will probably be with him, but right now, we need everyone who can search.”

Conner nodded, steadying Tim on his feet before rising from the ground; he looked down at him. “Do you know where she went?”

Tim shook his head, grimace crossing his lips as he muttered, “I don’t think we’re gonna find her for a long time.” He glanced up at Conner. “Go. Now.” The boy nodded, flying off, and Tim took a few steps forward before stumbling into a wall. He heaved a sigh, picking up his transmitter from his belt.

He pushed a button, and a few seconds later, a voice came over the line. What’s going on?

Tim frowned and asked, “What’s your E.T.A. to earth?”

Eighteen hours. What happened?

Tim glanced back at the body, the puddle of blood seeming to consume it. “It was (Y/N). She… she killed someone.”

The voice on the line was silent, then it said, Superman is on his way. Call me when he gets there.

The line went dead, and Tim sighed, sliding down the wall. He lent his head back, eyes staring up at the sky, waiting for (Y/N)’s father.

***Later In The Cave***

The group stood in silence, faces molded in a mixture of shock and pain. Tim yelped as Alfred pushed on his side. “Ow shi—Alfred!”

The man hummed, wrapping the cloth around his side. “Apologies, Master Tim.” He tucked an ice-pack between the layers. “With the broken ribs you’ve got, it would be best to keep ice close. I also advise against any harsh movements.”

Tim nodded, gaze turning to the man beside his oldest brother. “Clark.”

The man looked up from the ground, voice stricken as he lamented, “I can’t hear her. She’s…completely silent…” his eyes held a deep and sorrowed pain. “I can’t hear my baby girl.”

The others listened, then Jason stepped forward, expression grim and solemn. “Tim, what exactly happened in San Francisco today?”

The boy looked over at him before dropping his gaze to the ground, sighing, “What didn’t happen out there, Jason?”

Tim shook his head, clearing his throat. “It was a routine mission, patrol the area before getting back to the tower, but Bart called and said that he saw what looked to be a meta-human going on a rampage. We all met up and started fighting, and while it took some time, we managed to get him to an abandoned warehouse complex. Turns out, he not only had super strength, but he could also make copies of himself, and when I figured out that the original was susceptible to damage while he had copies, I sent Conner, Bart, and (Y/N) to fight the copies while I found him.”

He paused, picking at his nails. “What I didn’t expect was for him to throw me into a forklift and break three of my ribs. I tried to get up, but before I could move, his hands were around my throat, and he was lifting me up off the ground.” He absentmindedly reached up, fingers brushing the purple hand-prints around his pale neck. “Everything was happening so fast, and I couldn’t get my bearings in time. My vision started to get dark, and I could hear (Y/N) shouting from behind, and the next thing I knew, I was being dropped again. When I could see and breath clearly again, I looked up, and I saw (Y/N)…I saw her…”

A hand rested on his shoulder, and he glanced up, seeing Conner nodding firmly at him. He let out a breath and said, “And I saw (Y/N) standing there, and the meta-human lying in a pool of his own blood and he had…he had a hole through his chest.”

Quiet gasps were heard around the cave, and Tim looked up at Clark. “It was just an accident Clark, she didn’t mean to do it. She was trying to save me.” The man didn’t look at him, eyes glued to the floor as he swallowed thickly, obviously thinking about what he was just told.

Jason stepped up to Tim. “Do you know where she went?”

Tim shook his head. “No, she took off before I could stop her.”

“So, you’re pretty much saying that she could be anywhere.” Everyone turned their head at the sound of Dick’s voice.

Tim nodded. “That’s why I called everyone here. We need help trying to find her.”

Dick turned to Wally. “You and Bart comb Central.” The two took off, and Dick turned to Kori. “You should take Roy and go check around hideouts the Outlaws frequent.” Kori and Roy made their way to the stairs. “Tim, you sit out and monitor everything. Conner, you can help me and Jason check Gotham. Clark…”

Dick walked over and resting a hand on his arm. “You should go home and tell Lois about what’s happened, then check Metropolis.” Clark nodded, but made no move to go, and Dick squeezed his arm gently. “Clark.” He looked at Dick. “We will find her, I promise.”

Clark nodded again, this time finding his feet; he paused as he reached them and turned to Jason. “Jason?” He turned, waiting for Clark to continue. “I don’t really have any doubt that you’ll be the one to find her tonight…” His voice soft as he asked, “But when you do, will you tell her that I’m not angry at her?” Jason nodded, and they watched Clark leave.

Dick faced them, tone quiet. “Conner, you and I can take North and East Gotham, Jason, you should take South and West.”

They nodded at his words, each moving to the exit. Tim’s voice reached them before they could leave. “Jason! Can you wait for a minute?”

Jason nodded at the others, watching them leave before moving back to Tim. “What’s up?”

Tim hung his head and whispered, “It’s my fault, Jason. I should’ve been more vigilant when I was fighting. If I had gotten up sooner, none of this would’ve happened. I’m sorry—”

A hand rested on his shoulder and he looked up; Jason stared at him seriously. “Tim, it wasn’t your fault. And it wasn’t (Y/N)’s either.” He squeezed Tim’s shoulder gently. “Okay?” Tim nodded and Jason let go, though he saw the tears in Tim’s eyes.

***

Jason crouched atop the ledge staring down at the city, a frown crossing his lips. He didn’t bother to look up at the sound of someone’s boots hitting the rooftop, or when they stopped beside him. “Have you found her?”

He snorted, eyes following a car on the busy road. “Do you honestly think I’d be up here if I had?” He glanced up, seeing Dick slightly grinning at him.

Dick lowered himself on the ledge until he sat next to Jason, legs hanging freely off the edge. The two of them simply stared out at the streets, observing the cars carrying their passengers’ home.

After a few moments, Dick asked, “Where do you think she is?”

He watched Jason shrug and murmur, “I have no idea…I’ve searched everywhere that has any kind of meaning to us and I still can’t find her.” He looked at Dick, eyes filled with trepidation. “I’m worried about her, Dick…she’s all alone out there, thinking about what’s happened, and it’s eating me up.” He shook his head, letting out a sigh. “I shouldn’t have left San Francisco earlier. I should’ve stayed.”

Dick’s eyebrows shot up at his words. “Wait, you were in San Fran earlier today?”

Jason nodded. “Spent the night with her but left in the morning.” He thumped the heel of his armored boot against the wall. “I could’ve stopped that meta and she wouldn’t have done anything.”

“You’re really torn up about her killing someone, Jason.”

Jason turned to Dick, shouting. “Of course I am!” He placed a hand against his chest. “I kill bad people because they’re evil and they deserve it. I wouldn’t want (Y/N) or any of the people I care about to follow the path that I do.” He paused, voice lowering. “(Y/N) is…a good person. She’s kind and caring and she loves everyone with everything she has. She protects those that are innocent and protects those she loves even more fiercely.”

He sighed heavily, his voice lowering to a whisper. “I’d never want her to have to think about the people she kills like I do.”

“You’re telling me you actually think about the people you kill?”

Jason let out a mirthless laugh, his gaze returning to the city. “Contrary to popular belief and what you see when you look at me, I am not a heartless killer, Dick. I know the consequences of my actions, and believe me, I think about them every moment I’m alive.” He stood and looked down at his brother. “I’m going to hit my apartment and take a nap before getting back out there.”

Dick nodded, observing him as he started climbing down the ledge; he called out to Jason. “She’s really changed you in the year you’ve been together.”

Jason snorted, “Don’t tell anyone, I’ve got a reputation to keep.” He paused, hand gripping the ledge as he replied, “ But yeah she has… and only in the best ways, Dickhead.”

“Hey!”

***

The apartment was quiet, just as he’d left it the day before, and he shucked his helmet and jacket off, placing them on the table. He bent over, undoing the laces from his boots, kicking them off before reaching up and pulling his domino mask off, raising a hand to rub the fatigue from his eyes. It was a futile attempt to delay the inevitable, and as he made his way to his room, he mentally took note of how long he needed to sleep before getting back in the field to look for her.

As he walked through the hallway, a quick intake of air sounded through the apartment, and Jason reached to his hip, pulling a pistol. He stepped carefully through the hall, checking the rooms before he came up to his bedroom. Sucking in a quiet breath, he stepped into the room, gun following his gaze as it landed on a huddled mass beside the window.

He walked silently over to it, and upon closer inspection, his eyes widened, voice laced with disbelief as he questioned, “(Y/N)?”

She raised her head, eyes red rimmed and bloodshot. “Jason?” she whispered, unsure of herself.

He lowered the gun, placing it on the nightstand before moving to her, hands grasping her upper arms. “(Y/N), we’ve been looking everywhere for you.” He shook his head. “Why didn’t you call one of us and tell us where you were?” She didn’t respond to him, simply looking down. Jason let go of one of her arms, gently cupping her cheek. “Doll?”

He felt something wet drip onto his hand, and finally, she sat up straight and stared at him. The blanket she’d been covered with fell away, and his gaze dropped to her arms. His eyes widened at the sight of the faint red smeared across her arm. “(Y/N),” He breathed.

“I kept scrubbing and scrubbing, but no matter how hard or how much I did, it wouldn’t come off.” The tears were rolling down her cheeks now, and she lowered her head. “I didn’t mean to do it Jason. I just…”

Jason reached for her, pulling her into his arms and hoisting her up. He reclined against the headboard, arms wound tightly around her. “Shh…it’s alright…”

“I killed him, Jason.” (Y/N) pulled back enough to look him in the eyes. “I kept yelling for him to let Tim go, but he wouldn’t. I could hear Tim’s heartbeat fading and I just reacted.” She gazed at her arm. “I put my arm through his chest, Jason!” (Y/N) stared at her arm as if it didn’t belong to her body, an alienated limb, then she felt herself being lifted again. “Jason what—”

He said nothing, maneuvering her into the bathroom where he sat her on the sink. She watched as he pulled a rag from the cabinet and reached below the sink for a bottle. He poured the solution into the rag, then gently took her arm, wiping it. His gaze was unreadable, but it was anything but hard; in fact, it was soft, and before she knew it, the remaining blood had been wiped away.

Jason threw the towel into the hamper and turned back to her, cradling her face in his hands. “It’s all gone, (Y/N)…it’s not there anymore.” Her eyes lowered to her arm before they rose back to his, and he pressed his forehead against hers. “You don’t have to think about this anymore, doll.”

“I killed him though, Jason.”

She felt him shake his head and he asked, “What would’ve happened if you hadn’t?” She went silent, and Jason asked again, “(Y/N), what would’ve happened to Tim if you hadn’t protected him?”

Clearing her throat, she whispered, “He would’ve died.”

“No, he would’ve been murdered.” Jason looked in her eyes. “(Y/N),you saved Tim’s life.”

“At the expense of another’s.”

Jason let out a sigh and nodded. “Sometimes that’s the only way…but (Y/N)?” She looked at him and he insisted clearly, “What you did today…does not make you a killer, and it doesn’t make you a murderer…do you understand that?”

(Y/N) blinked at him before looking away and muttering, “…You should call everyone and tell them where I am.”

Jason reached down and picked her up from the sink, flicking off the light and moving to the bed. He lowered her down before crawling under the covers beside her, pulling her to him and raising the covers to their chins.

“I’ll call later.” He pressed his lips to her forehead. “Right now, the only thing that matters is you.” (Y/N) bit her lip to keep from crying, and a moment later, Jason quipped, “Remember that time that you threw me out of a third story window?”

(Y/N) let out a watery laugh, burying her face in his chest. “You’re never gonna let that go, are you, Jason?”

She glanced up at him, and he leaned down, pecking her nose. “If I keep getting a reaction out of it, probably not.”

(Y/N) searched his eyes for a moment then whispered, “I love you, Jason.”

He nodded, pressing his lips to hers. “I love you too, (Y/N).” He curled his arms around her, caging her to his chest. “Get some sleep…I’ll be here when you wake up.”

She did as he said, tucking her head under his chin. “Promise?”

“Cross my heart, doll.”

[chasingpj]

𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐦𝐞?

"My soulmate is so mean. He’s done nothing good with these stupid drawings. You know, all I want is something cute, like a picture of, maybe, flowers?"

pairing: leo valdez x gn reader

words: 2,994

warnings: cursing, mentions of genitalia

category: one-shot, soulmate!au

You don’t know who your soulmate is, but when you find out, you know the first thing you’ll do is punch him in his face. You don’t understand why he does this. Why can’t he be romantic like everyone else? You have a few friends who have the same connection you share with your soulmate, through your skin. Your friends rise from their slumbers with beautiful sketches on their arms; Or throughout the day, lines will appear as they’re being drawn, creating the most beautiful artwork you’ve ever seen. However, of course, you don’t get that; instead, you get this.

You stare at yourself in the mirror with pure disbelief, and you can’t decide whether to cry or scream. You’re used to these kinds of drawings in places like your arms, stomach, and legs, so they were easy to hide. But this has never happened before; it's never been in a place so… so visible.

You fill with rage as you observe the sloppily drawn dick on your forehead and your fist clenches as it lays on top of your bathroom sink. You fucking ass. How the hell am I going to hide this? You have to be at work in fifteen minutes, and you have this vulgar drawing on your forehead. You’re sure if you tell your boss your situation, he’d probably dismiss you because this is obviously not appropriate for the workplace. Still, you can’t even imagine trying to explain this to him. It was way too embarrassing.

"What am I going to do?” You whine as you rub your hands on your face. The drawing won’t be removed from your skin unless your soulmate removes it on his, so you had to think of a solution right away.

“Where could he possibly be where this is acceptable?” You try to refrain from sobbing hopelessly as your frantic mind searches for a solution. You think maybe a hat will work, but you discard the idea knowing your boss will tell you to take it off once you’re indoors. Suddenly, like a sign from the heavens, your solution hits you right in the face when you catch sight of your makeup bag lying on the toilet seat. You reach over, grabbing the pouch and unzipping it. Your quivering hands move too fast, causing the products to fall out and scatter into the sink. Your eyes skim over them in search of your thickest foundation and concealer. When you find them, along with your primer, you sigh, saying a silent prayer before getting to work.

***

Leo gasps sharply as the sight of his face in the mirror shocks him out of his fatigue. He touches his forehead, trying to recall the memory of last night while ignoring the pounding headache surging through his skull. He remembers getting to the club with a group of friends and how they took one shot after another until their vision was blurry. He has a faint memory of dancing with some girl, and the chaos of his 4 am Macdonald’s run with his friends. However, he doesn't recall the moment when this picture was drawn on his face. When did this happen? More importantly, who did this? He pauses, gawking at his reflection. His jaw clenches as the culprit comes to mind. He felt foolish for questioning who did this because he lives with, and he went home with one person last night, and that's Percy.

“Percy!” He yells angrily, and in the next room, he hears Percy’s manic laughter getting louder as he runs down the hall and into the bathroom with him. Percy can’t help but laugh even harder at the sight of a distressed Leo, and he silently congratulates himself for pulling such a successful prank. Leo’s expression hardens, and his gaze snaps over to him, “It's not funny!”

Percy snorts and nudges his shoulder, "Come on, loosen up!" Leo laughs sarcastically,

"Come on, loosen up!" He mocks with clear annoyance, making Percy’s laughter ceases. Leo usually takes things like this so well; he's never been angry at him because of a childish prank. The two of them have been pulling pranks on each other since they moved in together, and they would always laugh it out while deviously planning their revenge. Percy tilts his head, now growing annoyed that Leo’s annoyed.

"Why are you so uptight today?" He almost snaps, not understanding his fury. Leo's eyes narrow at him,

"My soulmate is linked to my skin." He speaks slowly and carefully, accentuating his words to make sure Percy understands how bad this is. Percy's mouth drops open, and he stares at the vulgar art on his forehead.

"Oh… shit," is the only thing he can think of saying. “Fuck, I forgot. I’m sorry,” Percy apologizes even though he knows it doesn’t help anything. He didn’t share the same connection with his soulmate, so he had forgotten entirely about Leo’s bond with his. He’s now left with regret knowing that there's someone out there going along their day trying to hide this lewd image.

Leo groans as he throws his head back. "I-It'll wash off? Right?"

Leo flips up the sink’s nozzle, dipping his head in the cold tap water to wet his face. He scrubs with his fingers, blindly grasping the soap next to him. He runs it over, spreading the suds and lightly scratching his forehead. He rinses everything off and returns to his original position to check his face now. He yells in panic when he sees the drawing didn't budge at all; it didn't even fade. Percy audibly gasps,

"I used permanent marker."

"BRO!"

"I'm sorry!"

Percy shifts on his feet as the memory of last night comes back to him. Leo fell asleep in the cab ride home, and Percy, somehow without much balance, carried him over his shoulder into their apartment complex. He squints his eyes, and with a vague remembrance, he recalls plopping him down on the couch. Leo was unconscious, and Percy’s drunk mind saw this as a perfect opportunity to prank him. He picked the first marker he saw, and in the middle of a giggling fit, he sloppily drew the phallic item and took a picture.

Leo frantically puts his head back in the sink to scrub again, and Percy stands by the door, watching panic wash over him. Leo continues scrubbing his skin, and though his skin becomes red under the friction of his nails, he persists. Percy shakes his head, walking over to him quickly, and he pats his shoulder.

"Come on, man. It's not working; you’re gonna hurt yourself." If Percy let him, Leo would scrub his skin raw. He disregards his advice and continues to scrub, bringing the soap over the drawing once again before scratching harshly. Percy, not wanting his friend to hurt himself, turns off the tap, and Leo groans, standing straight. He stares at himself in the mirror, his face dripping wet, and his skin is red with irritation. I'm so sorry.

***

Your day hasn't gotten any better since this morning. First, you wake with a dick on your forehead; second, you miss your bus because you took so much time layering makeup on your face. Then, you get to work about 15 minutes late because your commute, which usually took about 5 minutes, was delayed due to traffic. You assumed that your day couldn’t get any worse, but you discovered you spoke too soon when the system your job uses to put in orders crashed, making your job even harder than it had to be. Also, you spilled hot coffee on yourself during the morning rush, and that almost sent you straight into tears, but somehow, you prevailed.

By the afternoon, you wanted to rip your hair out when you realized you forgot your wallet, leaving you unfed and cranky. Your boss was no help to your mood either. He picked at everything you did today and held a grudge about you being late this morning. You've never had such a shitty day at work, and there is a sense of relief when you witnessed the clock turn to 4:30 pm. You immediately stood up from your chair, collecting your things before walking straight to the computer to clock out.

The last challenge you're facing is to get home in the slippery aftermath of the pouring rain earlier today. It was colder than usual; the sun’s hidden behind stormy gray clouds, and the smell of wet soil is in the air. You shiver, your arms wrapped around your frame in a poor attempt to keep you warm. You don't have an umbrella, and you hope it doesn’t start raining again. You were sure that if your makeup washes away in the rain for everyone to see the mystery under it, you will lose your mind.

You stand in the corner of the waiting shed, resting your head on the side. You take a deep breath, noticing your hands are anxiously chipping away the week-old nail polish. From the corner of your eye, you see someone join you under the shed, and out of usual curiosity, you look over. A tall, slender guy stands in the opposite corner; he wears distressed blue jeans, a black hoodie with a print you can’t see from your view, and a black winter hat. In his hands, he fiddles with a piece of scrap metal. His skin was tan, and his brown curly hair peeks from under his hat. Oblivious to your staring, he looks away from his fiddling and happens to glance over at you. There's a moment of awkward eye contact before you snap your vision away and out to the street.

You cringe at yourself for staring too long, shifting on your feet. You casually lean over the side of the curve, and you swear the light of the heavens was shining on your bus as it drove toward you. You couldn’t help but smile, a sense of relief washing over you. It’s here; you were one step closer to getting home and relaxing.

The excitement was taken away as quickly as it arrived, your bus passing your stop making a mini tsunami in the process. A wave of water splashes directly on you, and it takes you a moment to process what just happened. You stand there, cold and wet staring blankly at the curve. You felt overwhelmed, not being able to hold back the cries that you’ve been suppressing all day.

"are you-" a sob releases from your lips, stunning the unknown guy next to you. You miserably walk over to the bench, plopping down and resting your elbows on your thighs to lay your head in your hands. You sob freely, not caring about the boy's presence, and he stands in his spot, not sure what to do. He had an innate urge to make you feel better, and he doesn't know why but it pains him to see you like this. He clears his throat and decides to settle in the seat next to you. "Bad day?"

You sniffle, trying to find your breath, "The worst."

You don't look up, your hands doing their part to cover your face and your forehead. "I don't understand why everything is going so wrong.” You didn’t even care that you were pitying yourself, but you felt like you had the right considering how shit your day has been.

"I woke up with an awful drawing from my soulmate. I was late for my bus, which made me late to work; I haven't had lunch either. I'm hungry, cold, and now, soaking wet in street water." You sniffle once more. "My soulmate is so mean. He’s done nothing good with these stupid drawings. You know, all I want is something cute, like a picture of, maybe, flowers? I'd even take a tacky picture of two stick figures falling in love... shit; I’d be satisfied with a grocery list. But of course, with my luck, that doesn't happen. I get stupid drawings of... genitalia."

Leo’s body tenses next to you, and his teeth bite the inside of his lip. Drawings of genitalia? Sounds like him. Now he needed to see this drawing you were talking about, and he feels himself getting anxious at the possibility that you could be his soulmate. You continue to cry, refusing to move from your position.

"Well... it can't be that bad?"

"Oh, it's bad,” you managed to respond in your ragged breathing. Leo hesitantly reaches over, affectionately rubbing his hand across your upper back. Your breath hitches softly at the back of your throat, and there is a surge of warmth that radiates from his hand. You feel your tense shoulders begin to relax, and you furrow your eyebrows as your breath miraculously finds its regular pace. You even have this strange desire to cuddle into his frame to acquire more of his touch.

"Come on, show me. It's probably not as bad as you think." He speaks from his experience this morning. If you aren't his soulmate, he's sure that whatever you have isn't as traumatic as what he and his soulmate have.

"No! You'll laugh," you whine, your head laying firmly on your hands.

"I won't! I promise." You can tell from his voice that he was genuine, and for some reason, you can trust him. You slowly remove your hands from your face, but your head is still in an embarrassed bow. His heart pounds in his chest at the anticipation and leans forward to get a look at your face. You close your eyes, not wanting to see his initial reaction.

There it was. Right under your concealer, there is the familiar drawing faintly present. Leo's mouth drops, and his eyes widen; how is he going to tell you that he has the same picture on his forehead? You sigh shakily,

"It's bad, isn't it?" Your face burns in pure humiliation, and you now regret showing him. Leo is silent for a bit, trying to find words to explain himself.

"I'm sorry," he blurts out. Your eyebrows furrow and your eyes flutter open to look at his guilty expression.

"Why are you sorry?" He doesn't even attempt to explain himself in words. He simply slides off his winter hat, showing you the original drawing on his skin. You inhale sharply, your mind trying to process what is happening in front of you.

He's your soulmate, the person that you ideally would spend your life with. You didn't think you'd find him anytime soon or even at all. Your stomach flutters at the sight of him, and your cheeks get warm. You both gaze into each other’s eyes, and there was an immediate connection. You take in the tousled curls on his head, a bit frizzy from his hat and his big brown eyes. Your heart pumps hard in your chest, just as fast as the boy’s heart in front of you.

A few people told you that you’d feel like the world will slow down when you meet your soulmate. You’ll feel complete, and all at once, you’ll fall in love. You thought it was a load of over-romanticized bull, but you found that it was true even with your strange circumstance.

You finally found him…

But he's done this.

Your anger somehow counteracts this "in love" feeling, and you momentarily hate him for starting your day off on a sour note.

"You!" Your arms lift to strike him in the chest, but before you could attack, he grasps your tight fists.

"I'm sorry! I can explain!" He says quickly. Your arms loosen up, and you narrow your eyes at him,

"Explain yourself then." Sheepishly Leo cowers and his hands remain around your fist, just in case.

"Well," he sighs, "I partied a little too hard last night, and um, my roommate, Percy, thought it would be funny to draw this on my forehead."

"Your roommate is an ass."

"Well, yeah. Sometimes. But he was just as drunk as I was, and he didn't realize that the marker was permanent. When I saw it, I immediately thought of you, and how you’d have to walk around with this." He chews on the inside of his cheek, "I tried getting it off, but it won’t go away." You sigh, willing to forgive him since it wasn't his fault.

"So, we're gonna have this for a while?"

"Probably a couple of days or so." You groan and don’t say anything in return. You look down at your lap, still hiding your face from anyone around. "Oh, here, take my sweatshirt. The hoodie can keep it hidden.” He puts his hat back on and pulls his sweatshirt over his body, passing it to you. You smile softly as you take it from him. You pull it over your still soaked and cold frame, slipping your arms in and bringing the hood up. You mutter a small thank you, shoving your hands in the front pocket. He replies with a hum, allowing the sounds of the passing cars to fill your comfortable silence.

"Again, I'm sorry,” he apologizes sincerely, and you turn your head. You smile reassuringly,

"It's okay. I'll forgive you this time,” you say teasingly, and he chuckles. "I'm y/n, by the way."

"Leo." You reach over, taking his hand, and you guys share a handshake.

"Nice to meet you, soulmate.”

masterlists

[agapaic]

[19 days] whiplash [ch. 365 after-shot]

The shop will be closing soon. He’s seen an attendant wandering around, who will probably ask him to leave in the next five minutes. There’s no one else here. His clothes are vivid against the neon glow of the tanks. The fish cast strange shadows on his shirt, living out a second life on his skin.

They swim in half-circles before sharply changing direction, never touching the glass. He wonders if they know it’s there, as if they can sense some immovable wall that holds them back.

He’s not getting deep about this. He could contemplate, quite extensively, about how their freedom must be bought by some higher power, and they would really only go from one tank to the next, slightly bigger, slightly richer. It’s all fake shit, and he remembers that in some ways he’s got it better than an animal. He can, at least, run away. Maybe he won’t get far. Just to the edges of the city villages where he’ll get a job earning less than before and lose his place in school.

Guan Shan puts a finger on the glass in front of him. There’s a label in the corner, peeling away from the glass. Veiltail goldfish. They have wispy, membrane-like tails. He could put his hand on the other side and see all the way through. Guan Shan watches the only black fish in the tank move placidly through the water.

Beneath the label, a smaller one: Black moor. For a minute he considers tugging the label off and putting it in his pocket, a little secret. He remembers that would be stealing, in some way, and someone in the shop would have to go to the effort of printing and laminating and reapplying the label just for one fish.

Guan Shan turns away.

He wanders for a few more minutes. He’s aware of his reflection in the glass. He worries about how long the attendant will let him stay there, and the thought that they will make him leave makes him feel slightly sick. He likes it here—the quiet, the muted hum of the tanks, the strange lights. They make him feel somewhere else.

His mother is working the night shift and won’t be home until just before he’s meant to go to school the next morning. They’ll have long enough together that he could tell her he got fired from the shop, but not long enough that he could reasonably pretend to have forgotten as he tugs on his uniform and slips out the front door.

She won’t be mad—she never is.

She can’t take on another shift.

Mentally, he has started taking stock. His Xbox is a few years old, but he’ll get something for it. He has a stack of old music magazines from his dad that could catch the eye of a collector. His computer, maybe.

The earrings.

His stomach twists.

Really, it’s not much. It’ll earn them a month, which could be just long enough for him to get another job, but what’s the likelihood of that in a city where most kids are just trying to bulk their CV’s for their college applications. Besides, his grades speak for themselves. He got lucky with the shop, and lightning doesn’t strike twice.

‘Hey, kid. We’re closing soon, so unless you wanna buy something…’

Guan Shan nods. His shoulders round.

For no logical reason, he says: ‘Can I take a goldfish?’

‘Sure. The black moor? Saw you had your eye on that one.’

‘No, one of the others.’

The attendant comes up next to him. ‘Just the one? They don’t like being on their own, you know.’

He presses his jaw tightly. A small sound comes out of him. He looks at the price tag and is somehow shocked and saddened to see the figure so low.

‘Fine,’ he says. ‘The black one, too, I guess.’

He pays, then leaves. It’s late enough that the streets are quieter than he expected. He’s usually home by now, his shift over, reheating leftovers while he works on his homework. He stands there while the shop attendant locks up behind him, holding the plastic bag with two fish in his hand. He feels stupid. Behind his eyes, he can feel a sort of stinging sensation.

He has the unnameable urge to grab one of the passing strangers and tell them how he’s feeling, what has happened, what could happen. On some level he knows that everyone has their own problems, and he’s not the type of person to overstep his bounds. Instead, he watches them pass, and after a few more minutes he goes to the nearest subway station and gets the train home.

/

He had half expected He Tian to find him on the street. He’d imagined it, He Tian catching his arm as he wandered from store to store, deliberating at large windows with thin mannequins and expensive jewellery without price tags. There is a part of him that’s disappointed that it didn’t play out like this, a part of him that is even angrier to find He Tian sitting in the stairwell of his apartment when he eventually does get home.

It’s close to midnight, and the stairwell is clinically quiet. Outside, the stars are dusty and covered in a thin layer of smog that is less noticeable in the day. He Tian looks exhausted. He’s the type of good looking where even the slightest imperfection somehow makes him even more attractive. Guan Shan hates it.

He stands when Guan Shan walks in, suddenly filling the space, and Guan Shan says, ‘Get outta my way.’

‘Where have you been?’

Guan Shan shoulders past him. There’s a moment where he thinks He Tian will grab him around the shoulders, the air around him simmering enough that Guan Shan is convinced it’s a near thing, choking with danger, but he lets him pass. He follows Guan Shan up the staircase, his footsteps silent, his body casting long shadows on the steps where Guan Shan sets his feet.

At the door, Guan Shan pockets the notice that’s taped there, knowing He Tian has already seen it. Less sharply, he picks up the notes in He Tian’s and Jian Yi’s writing and folds them into careful squares.

‘You’re not comin’ in,’ he says.

‘I called you, like, fifty times. Did you block me?’

Guan Shan thinks He Tian sounds angrier than he really has a right to be. He turns and presses his back to the door. He has his keys clenched tightly in a closed fist.

‘Yeah. I didn’t want to talk to you. I thought you would’ve gotten that.’

‘I can get you another job. Something better paid.’

‘You’re so fuckin’ clueless.’

He Tian’s eyes tighten.

‘You’re ruining my life,’ says Guan Shan.

‘That’s—that isn’t true. I’ve helped you. You would’ve been expelled if—’

‘Maybe I would’ve gotten expelled. But I wouldn’t have had She Li on my dick all the time, would I? Wouldn’t need you to get me a job ‘cause you made me lose my last one, would I? You’re just—stickin’ a bandage on shit when you hurt me first.’

‘It’s not always like that. Don’t make it sound like it’s always like that.’

Guan Shan shakes his head. ‘I want you to go. I told you I didn’t want to see you again. Fuck off.’

He Tian says, ‘Let me pay what was on the door.’

‘Fuck off.’

He Tian doesn’t move and Guan Shan squeezes his eyes shut. He’s going to cry again, the frustration bubbling sourly in the back of his throat. He doesn’t trust himself to open the door while He Tian is still here because he knows he’ll probably let him in.

‘Do I really make you feel like a failure?’

Guan Shan rubs at his eyes with his fist. His voice comes hoarse and thick: ‘I am a failure. Bein’ around you just makes it so much more fuckin’ obvious.’

He doesn’t want He Tian’s pity when he says this, or his reassurance. He’s just being honest. Saying it out loud is kind of breathlessly relieving. He couldn’t say something like that to his mother, or any of the teachers at school. He couldn’t say it to Grey, who he’s known for years. He Tian knows more about him than anyone. It’s a terrifying thought.

If they never see each other again, will He Tian tell everyone the things Guan Shan has told him? About the restaurant and his dad, or about She Li and the things Guan Shan has let him do to him? He feels vulnerable and sick thinking about it, completely powerless, as he does a lot of the time when he’s around He Tian.

He oscillates between that feeling of uselessness and the feeling of being so empowered that he thinks it must be what being high or drunk feels like. That latter has him trusting his own convictions, having an unadulterated faith in himself like jumping from a bridge and thinking he might just fly—so long as He Tian is with him. He doesn’t like how it’s one or the other, empowered or powerless, and rarely anything in between. He’s heard adults on TV talking about being codependent, pulled punishingly into each other's orbit, and he wonders if this is the same thing.

In the end he supposes it doesn’t really matter. So what if He Tian tells everyone? Probably, he won’t see the rest of the year out at school. He’ll get a job on a different side of the city and no one will hear from him ever again. The embarrassment will all be internal and will only last a week or two. Then life will move on. He wishes he were older and wiser and better at believing this. He wishes it didn’t feel like the universe might fall out from beneath him.

‘Doesn’t matter what I do, it turns to shit,’ he tells He Tian. ‘No matter how hard I work, I’m never gonna earn enough. I can spend three hours studyin’ for a test and still come last. If it isn’t She Li, then it’ll be someone else. I just—I can’t catch a fuckin’ break, He Tian. But you do somethin’ and you come first every time. Life’s so easy for you.’

He Tian shifts from side to side. ‘Do you think things wouldn’t feel so hard if you stopped focussing on what you think my life is like?’

‘You’re pissin’ me off.’

‘I don’t know how I’m meant to help you. You won’t let me give you money. It’s like pulling teeth from you just trying to know what’s going on with you. What are you so fucking afraid of?’

‘I never asked for your help.’

‘You shouldn’t have to—that’s why we’re friends.’

‘I never said I wanted to be your friend.’

He Tian frowns, his look very serious. He isn’t teasing tonight. Neither is Guan Shan. There is the sense that their interactions are always anything but teasing, really, some dark undercurrent that runs between the two of them like dark veins.

He Tian says, ‘Are those fish?’

For a moment Guan Shan thinks he’s joking, deflecting wildly to distract from the seriousness of what Guan Shan has just said. Then he feels the crinkle of a plastic bag in his hand and, remembering how he’d just spent the last few hours, nearly drops the two goldfish onto the floor.

‘Yeah,’ he says.

‘You don’t have a tank.’

‘Yeah, no. I don’t know why I bought them.’

He Tian hesitates. There is a curious, predictable gleam in his eyes. ‘Red and black?’

‘It’s all they had left at the store.’

He Tian is looking intently at the bag. ‘Do you remember when we went to the aquarium? And you said I wasn’t someone you could forget?’

‘I just meant that—’

‘I know what you meant. But I always pretend like you meant it the other way.’

Guan Shan thinks, Don’t you think things would be easier if you stopped focusing on what you want me to mean and what I actually mean?

Instead of saying anything, he looks down at his sneakers. They’re scuffed and starting to rip at the seams. The thought of having to buy new ones makes him panic and the thought of buying a pair of second-hand ones online makes him panic even more. There’s no shame in it, but the thought of wearing someone else’s clothes makes him feel strange, especially when he knows He Tian could buy fifty pairs without blinking.

Guan Shan considers that thought and replays what He Tian has just said about focusing on his life too much more than his own. Maybe part of that is true.

Before He Tian, did he always feel things so intensely? Did the bad always feel so fucking awful? He knows that things were mechanical, and he was mean and didn’t think much about other people in particularly nice ways. He knows he didn’t laugh much then, or have dinners and sleepovers with friends. He knows everything hurt on a distant, muted level that was easy to ignore. Not much time has passed since then, and he reasons that nothing about him has probably changed, just everything else around him.

‘I can’t understand why you won’t let me help you,’ says He Tian, when the silence has stretched too long.

‘Because I’ll get used to it.’

He Tian frowns, not understanding.

‘One day, you’re not gonna be around. And I’ll be fucked.’

‘I’ll always be there for you.’

‘You don’t know that. People say that a lot and then they disappear or get taken away, even if they didn’t want to.’

It’s obvious they’re talking about his dad, but it feels safer to talk about things in vague, subjective conversation. Maybe things would be easier if they talked openly about things and didn’t use metaphors and hypotheticals. As it is, Guan Shan doesn’t feel ready to try the alternative. He is conscious of the fact that this feels like a conversation. They are passing words back and forth that hold meaning and neither of them has touched the other yet. It feels new and fragile as an oil painting, still wet, and so he doesn’t let himself think about this for long.

‘I think you’re getting this wrong,’ says He Tian. ‘I’m not asking you to rely on me. Obviously, I’d kind of like that. I like the thought of you needing me, and I know that says something about me. But—I’m just asking you to let me help you. Just here and there, no strings.’

Guan Shan rubs his forehead with the back of his knuckles. His keys are starting to pinch his skin and he can feel a headache starting to surface.

‘I’m tired,’ he says. ‘I actually do want you to go.’

He Tian’s jaw clenches and he breathes out heavily through his nose. He’s probably thinking he’s wasted his time.

‘Okay,’ he says then. ‘But we’re not done.’

A new wave of exhaustion comes over Guan Shan, crippling and final. He wants to get into bed with his skin against cold sheets and sleep for twelve hours without waking once.

‘You’re not the only one that ever gets to decide that,’ he tells He Tian, a little sharply. ‘You’ve gotta learn to let people go.’

‘But what if I know I can help them?’ says He Tian. ‘If I don’t, I’ve just—failed.’

They look at each other.

A minute stretches into an eternity that could be seconds or hours, and everything has gone backwards. Everything is the same.

Guan Shan can’t put his finger on what has just happened, but he feels like laughing. Their fears are twinned, self-perpetuating, some kind of ouroboros chasing its tail. Who will get caught first?

They both seem to take in a breath at the same time, and He Tian takes a step back.

‘Goodnight,’ he says.

Guan Shan nods. He waits for He Tian’s retreating back to disappear a few flights down before opening the door to his apartment, and shuts it swiftly behind him.

/

There’s a knock at the door while he’s brushing his teeth. The fish are swimming placidly in their bag on the edge of the bathroom sink. It’s past one, and he keeps all the lights off because his eyes are feeling sore. He’s adjusted to the dim glow that comes from street lamps seeping through the curtains, the blink of the timer on the electric stove, his Xbox gleaming in his bedroom. His mother shouldn’t be home yet and she has her own set of keys.

With a sinking heart, Guan Shan pictures his landlord demanding payment.

Worse, he pictures He Tian. Before He Tian left, they’d resolved nothing. It feels like being back to square one, chasing each other around a chess board. It fills him with a vast emptiness that makes him feel like he’s existing outside of himself, waiting for someone else to take over.

He pads silently towards the front door, his toothbrush jammed into his cheek, and peers through the viewer. There’s toothpaste dripping down his chin. In the hall, there’s no one there. He’s half-convinced he imagined it. He counts to ten before he opens the door, steps out—and his foot connects with something hard. There is a cardboard box sitting on the welcome mat.

Guan Shan peers around. The light in the stairwell is artificially bright. He kneels down and opens the tabs on the box, which hasn’t been taped. He swallows.

For the fish, says the note on the second box, nestled inside the first. Careful, it’s fragile.

Guan Shan rubs the heel of a palm into his right eye. He sighs. Then he reaches out, braces himself, and picks up the tank. He carries it into his apartment, and the door locks behind him.

/

thank you for reading! if you’d like to support me on my ko-fi/request a short drabble, you can do so here: https://ko-fi.com/agapaic 💞

[hispipsqueak]

Sweet Dreams

(Obey Me) Belphegor x F!Reader NSFW

Summary: Late night texts lead to a spicy adventure in the attic. Who said night time was for sleeping?

WC: 1.8K

TW: Hard Dom Belphie, humiliation, degradation, name-calling, pillow humping, facial, dacryphilia, spit, demon dick anatomy

A/N: Hello! Here’s some mean Belphie to flutter your hearts. I love dom Belphie and while I do think he can be a soft sweetie, I CLEARLY love me some mean boys. Hope you like it! As always, likes and reblogs are heckin’ appreciated!

3:42 A.M.

Your D.D.D buzzed, waking you up. Cracking an eye open, you opened the message, ready to curse Mammon out if he and Asmo were drunk texting you again.

“Hey.”

Typical Belphie. How do you even respond to that? You closed your eyes again. Maybe if he texted more than one word you would –

*BZZ*

“I know you’re awake, MC”

You rolled your eyes. 

“What’s up Belphie? It’s 3 AM by the way. You of all people should be asleep right now.”

His response was immediate.

“Can’t sleep. Come to the attic.”

Your bed was so warm and comfortable. And he wanted you to walk all the way to the attic? He really was insane.

Another text came in.

“Please?”

You groaned, pulling yourself away from the soft comforter and pillows. Normally, you would have just ignored him until he fell asleep but you were a sucker for soft Belphie, the side he rarely showed anyone but Beel and you. With Beel being out for a tournament, you knew he was probably struggling with being alone.

You silently crept to the attic, knowing the brothers would throw a fit if they knew you were sneaking into Belphie’s room at night.

You knocked quietly on the heavy attic door and Belphie opened it with a sleepy smirk. His navy hair was tousled and he looked so smug for getting you to come to his room in the middle of the night. Stupid handsome bastard.

“I’m here Belph. What do you want?”, you yawned. He tugged you in the room, locking the door behind you.

 You laid in his bed, pulling his cow print pillow to your chest as you tried to get comfortable, expecting him to curl up next to you to sleep. A few moments passed and you peeked over at him, still standing by the door staring at you.

You weren’t planning on seeing anyone in the middle of the night so you were just wearing a pair of tiny pink shorts and a tank top. You felt his eyes roaming over your skin, and you pulled the sheets around you.

“Don’t tell me you just brought me here because you’re horny.” You muttered, glaring at him. You weren’t opposed to hooking up but playing the soft, lonely demon card? 

He grinned, and you felt a shiver run down your spine.

“What if I did? You gonna complain about it, little human?” He murmured, moving so he was standing in front of you. You had to crane your neck to look in his eyes and you had a feeling he relished looking down on you like this. 

You couldn’t deny you were turned on. Belphie had a way of commanding the situation when you were alone and though he appeared to be the sarcastic sleepy brother, you knew behind closed doors he would have you on your knees, begging for him.

But, you were still kind of pissed at being woken up. So, you decided to tease him.

“Belphie, I’m sleeeeeepy. I came here to sleep.” You whined, making a show of turning around and cuddling his pillow. You knew your shorts were riding up on your thighs, hugging the curves of your ass and you wrapped your leg around the pillow.

“Better bite the pillow.” He said quickly before smacking your ass, HARD. You yelped, shoving the pillow over your mouth so as to not wake anyone.

“Belphie, what the fuck?!” You angrily whisper-shouted at him, as your body wiggled in an attempt to soothe the stinging pain. He laughed, and tugged you around so you were facing him.

“Keep acting like a brat. I can do this all night.” His amethyst eyes glinted sadistically. You pouted, but stayed quiet.

“You gonna behave?” He asked, tilting your chin so you looked up at him. Fuck, you looked so good like this. You were feisty and fiery, a general pain in the ass all the time, so knowing he could make you submit to him stroked his ego immensely. 

You nodded, still pouting and he chuckled.

“Open.”

Immediately, your mouth opened and he let a glob of spit fall from his mouth on your tongue. You opened your mouth to show him your tongue for approval. He gave a short nod and you swallowed.

“Good little human.”

You rolled your eyes, though you couldn't keep from pressing your thighs together. As much as you wanted to pretend you were in control, you were playing a game with a literal demon. 

"I can smell your arousal. Fuck, I'm amazed my brothers haven't come up here since you're dripping like a whore. Just because I spit in your mouth?" Belphie taunted. Your eyes narrowed and you bit your lip, before looking away.

He gripped your hair, tugging it tightly. His eyes bore into your soul.

"You wanna act like a brat? I had plans to fuck you till you cried from pleasure. And yet, you seem to just want to be punished." 

He looked at the pillow that you had left tangled in his bedsheets, the pillow you had stretched your body over, taunting him. A wicked idea formed in his mind.

"You know what happens to brats like you?" He asked, yanking you to the floor. You looked up at him questioningly, a little scared but very turned on.

"Answer me, slutty human."

"N-no...I don't know." You said tentatively. He chuckled darkly.

"Naughty little brats don't get to cum on my cock. Fuck, naughty little brats may not get to cum at all."

You let out a whine, frustrated at this turn of events.

"You wanna cum? Get on your knees. Maybe if you do a good job, I'll take pity on your pathetic slutty pussy."

He pulled his cock out, slapping it against your cheek as he laughed. His cock was long and ridged, with a flared tip. Demon cocks, unlike human's, were made to fuck and breed, and you were spoiled having spent so long in the Devildom.

You parted your lips, as he slapped his member on your drooling tongue, before taking it deep into your mouth. His hands tangled in your hair as he fucked your face.

"Fuck, that's it slut. Take me down your throat. Just like that." 

Tears pricked at the corner of your eyes as you forced more of him down. Your jaw already ached but you kept your mouth wide, struggling not to gag on his length as his heavy balls smacked your chin. You squeezed your legs together, hoping he would take pity on you.

"Poor little human, desperate to get off. You want to ride my cock?" He asked, pulling you off his cock harshly. Strings of saliva connected the two of you. You gasped, gulping air down as you nodded.

He grabbed the pillow from the bed and threw it at you.

"Too bad. Use this. Put on a good show, and maybe I’ll fuck you.”

Your face burned with embarrassment.

“You can’t be serious.” You looked up at him. He moved his face right in front of yours, so close you could feel his warm breath on your cheek as he squeezed your face, so tightly it hurt.

“Wanna find out?”

He let go of your cheeks and shoved you back to the floor. Your eyes watered with embarrassment, shame, and yet you were so fucking turned on, you knew you would be leaving a wet patch on his pillow.

You straddled the body pillow and the slight friction of the pillow against your cunt made you whimper. You squeezed the pillow tightly between your thighs, slowly riding it, pathetic mewls falling from your mouth. You closed your eyes, trying to pretend you were in your room and not being scrutinized by the sadistic seventh-born.

“Eyes on me whore. And don’t you dare think about cumming without permission.” He smirked. You looked up at him as tears spilled down your cheeks. You wanted so badly to grind yourself on the pillow until you creamed all over it but you knew he would find more humiliating ways to torment you if you dared.

“Take off your shirt. Don’t know why the fuck you’re wearing it anyway. You’re just a fucktoy for me to use. Isn’t that right, little human?” He laughed as he sat back in a chair, watching you perform for him. He slowly palmed his cock as you pulled off your tank top, the cold air causing your nipples to harden.

“Pinch them, show me how much of a slut you are. Show me why I should even bother with you.” His hand tightened on his cock.

You wrapped your legs around the pillow tighter to hold it in just the right spot as you tugged and pinched at your breasts. Your soft moans filled the room and you knew you couldn’t last much longer like this.

“Please Belphie, c-can’t hold it in...please fuck me.” You sobbed out, your muscles tensing as you rubbed your clit against the black and white fabric. You could feel the wetness of the pillow against your thighs and knowing that your slick would be embedded in it turned you on even more.

“You can beg better than that, can’t you slut?” Belphie chuckled again, but you could see his grip tightened around the base of his cock and he was jerking himself off faster. 

“Fuck...please, please let me cum. Want to cum for you, want to be your slutty fucktoy. Wanna be good for you.” You cried, biting your lip so hard you could taste blood.

“Cum.” he panted out.

Your eyes rolled back as you gushed around the soaking pillow. Your legs were squeezing it so tightly you knew you would be sore tomorrow, and you drooled out a mixture of curses and Belphie’s name as you came down from your high.

Suddenly Belphie let out a low groan and your face was hit with an explosion of warm, sticky cum. You slammed your eyes shut as he pumped load after load onto your skin. His seed spilled down your chin and dripped over your breasts.

‘Fuck, fuck MC. Fuck, I’m sorry!” Belphie breathed out, half laughing while attempting to catch his breath. You leaned back on the bed, trying to avoid getting it in your eye.

“You’re such an ass Belphie.” You whined, pouting as he cleaned you up with a towel.

After cleaning up, the two of you lay back in the bed, his head nuzzled into your chest. You ran your fingers through his dark hair humming softly.

“Hey MC.” He whispered.

“Hey yourself.” You whispered back.

The room was silent and you thought he fell asleep finally. You closed your eyes. Finally, his voice broke the calm silence.

“My pillow is gonna smell like you FOREVER.”

[insaneoldme]

Can you rec buddie fics? Pretty please?

OMG it's my time to shine, bitches!!!

Sorry if I went a little nuts, but this fandom has some of the best writers I've ever seen. I have 186 Buddie fics bookmarked in my AO3,

I'll link here if you are interested in taking a look cause if I put them all here it would be too long. Also, I tried to show here some fics I very rarely see recced, and a little bit o the classics. This fandom has some very underrated authors, everyone in my bookmarks is worth taking a look really.

Please take a look at the warnings before reading, enjoy!!!

I Hate Accidents (Except When We Went From Friends to This) by morganofthefairies (Rated E )

Buck and Eddie had always been unconventional. Neither of them gave it much thought – they were just them. Buck and Eddie - partners, best friends, co-parents – just as entangled in each other’s lives as any actual couple in the 118.

Or, the story of how Buck and Eddie went about their relationship in entirely the wrong order.

My Heart's Been Borrowed by ElvenSorceress (Rated E)

aka the one where Taylor gives Buck his ultimate fantasy and uncovers far more than either of them expected, forcing him to confront his long held feelings for Eddie

Half Awake in Our Fake Empire by HMSLusitania (Rated E)

Buck 1.0 fathered a child and Buck 4.0 comes into custody.

Love and Bullets Both Shatter Hearts (But Only One Can Put You Back Together) (Rated E)

Agent [Redacted] Diaz is the best at what he does. Usually. But lately there's this real pain in the ass* who's been ruining his missions: Code Name "Buck."

Keep It On by R_E_R6 (Rated E)

When Eddie walks in on Buck, bent over in nothing but a hoodie, their plans for the night immediately change. Buck's outfit though? Well, Eddie requests that it stays the same...for reasons.

Heart of Flowers / Heart of Gold by ElvenSorceress (Rated T)

Buck nearly loses everything and Eddie has to follow his heart

hungry for your love by evcndiaz (Rated G)

prompt: "who’s gonna write a fanfic where chris is not cooperating with buck and eddie accidentally says “listen to your dad”?"

or; breadsticks are a metaphor for love and boning

keep your eyes on the road by iriswests (Rated M)

A glimpse into buck and eddie’s developing relationship, told through ten moments stopped at a traffic light

when things fall into place by woodchoc_magnum (Rated M)

In which Eddie asks Buck to move in with them during lockdown to help look after Christopher, which leads to certain unresolved feelings being resolved.

Carbon Date Me, Excavate Me by extasiswings, letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Rated E)

Evan "Buck" Buckley has made a name for himself as the independent bad boy of archaeology. At least, until Professor Eddie Diaz shows up with his fedora and good looks and starts beating Buck to the punch more often than not.

Buck hates his stupid six-pack covered guts.

Except for how... he might not.

Objects in the Mirror by SevenSoulmates (Rated E)

The voice had always been around, Eddie remembers it, like a stream of consciousness that babbled incoherently to the point where Eddie just tuned it out.

But then the voice started speaking directly to him. Conversing like he was a whole person standing right in front of him. Like he could see what was happening around Eddie.

Eddie shook his head. No one was talking to him, and Eddie most certainly was not talking back.

He wouldn’t talk to the boy in his head ever again. There was no boy in his head.

ripples all the way down by iriswests (Rated M)

christopher partakes in some parent trapping

dream of some epiphany by extasiswings (Rated M)

Evan Buckley is lost.

It’s happenstance that he wanders into the navy recruiting center—he’s been in San Diego for a few weeks, bartending late nights and weekends, living in a house with three other guys not because he needs the roommates but because he doesn’t want to be alone, and the military is…respectable. Stable. So Buck thinks maybe and opens the door.

Buck leaves ten minutes later with a set of printed instructions for sending his first letter, assured that he can drop it off whenever he’s ready, and a name.

Staff Sergeant Edmundo “Eddie” Diaz.

Relationship Advice from Complete Strangers Online by HMSLusitania (Rated T)

Hi, I’ve never made a Reddit post before and I’m not 100% sure what I’m doing but I need advice and can’t ask anyone in my real life. So, I [30M] have this best friend [34M]…

Leading with the Left by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Rated E)

When Buck said he was a "bartender" in "South America" what he actually meant was "stripper" in "Mexico."

And when Eddie said, "What's your problem?" what he actually meant was, "Is this about the time you gave me a lap dance?"

In other words, there's a few things the 118 doesn't know about Buck. Or Eddie. Or Buck and Eddie's relationship.

fireflies where my caution should be by littlesnowpea (Rated M)

“You never talk about your parents,” Eddie says, which is not even remotely what Buck expects Eddie to say. He frowns, tilts his head, but it isn’t a question, as evidenced by Eddie charging on. “I never asked because I figured it was your business, but the look on your face any time they’re brought up tells me you don’t get along.”

Buck swallows hard, against a lump in his throat. His parents? Eddie’s right, he never talks about them, for good reason. He opens his mouth, then closes it again, not sure what he’s even going to say.

Eddie takes it as the answer Buck is trying to make it out to be. He squeezes Buck’s wrist again, takes a deep breath, like he’s on a call with someone who’s panicking. Buck finds his breathing slowing to match Eddie’s, and Eddie nods as Buck gets it under control.

“There are people on the porch,” Eddie says, voice even. “Saying they want to meet their grandchild.”

Asked, Offered, Given, (He's) Taken by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Rated E)

People like to flirt with Buck on calls. It kind of makes Buck uncomfortable.

And that makes Eddie frustrated.

I Hit the Accelerator (But the Car was in Reverse) by extasiswings, letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Rated E)

When Buck is forced to confront the truth about his breakup with Abby, having casual sex with his hot new coworker seems like the best rebound idea.

Unfortunately, that hot new coworker turns into his best friend. But best friends can keep having sex with each other, right?

There's no way this could possibly go wrong.

Memorable by JessicaMDawn (Rated T)

Six times Buck got recognized by people he saved during the tsunami, and how his team realized he was a hero.

All Bets are Off by NobodyKnows_U (Not Rated)

Or, the five times the firefam realized Buck and Eddie were in love, and the one-time Eddie finally did something about it.

fire on fire by extasiswings (Rated T)

Or: Buck and Eddie get in the habit of sharing a bed while living together during quarantine. It's platonic until it isn't.

Better Together by Randomfandombloggs09 (Not Rated)

5 times Eddie sees Buck wearing his last name and 1 time its not just his

Daddy and Pops by EdithBlake (Rated M)

When Christopher calls Buck 'Pops' things get a bit confusing. Buck and Eddie have a talk with Christopher that ends up with both of them being even more confused by how right it sounds.

the meaning of the words you see by florenceandthemachine (Rated E)

unknown sender: Hi!

unknown sender: Just wanted to say thanks for letting me buy you a drink, and for your number. Sorry I had to run.

unknown sender: I’m Eddie by the way.

sent: hey um

sent: i don’t want 2 be this guy but

sent: i think u mayb put the wrong # in ur phone

the dream you wish will come true by woodchoc_magnum (Rated M)

In which Christopher Diaz cannot understand why his father would want to date his former teacher when Evan Buckley is right there.

vienna waits for you by mottainai (Not Rated)

Eddie doesn't deserve a soulmate.

Work Husband by hideeho (Rated T)

“What...what have you done with Buck?” Eddie is going to kill him for messing with his phone. No, that’s too extreme. He’s going to maim him. Just a little.

“Check under H,” Chim offers helpfully, shooting a look over to Hen with a smirk.

Why the hell would he be under—

Then he sees it.

Husband.

Bad Neighbors by firstdegreefangirl (Rated E)

Eddie's new neighbors are keeping him up all night. He calls on his best friend for a little taste of their own medicine.

Cross the Line by Sirencalls (Rated E)

Eddie laughs, short and quiet and almost to himself. “No. If you want to learn, then I’m gonna be the one to teach you.”

Buck is pretty sure his brain stops working. “What? Why?”

Eddie turns to look at him and steps closer, their chests only a few inches apart. “Because there are people out there who will take advantage of how naïve you are. They’ll hurt you, and I won’t.” Eddie’s eyes are so intense that Buck doesn’t have any choice but to believe him. “If you want someone to do this for you, to—to dominate you, it has to be me. I don’t trust anyone else to do it right.”

pretty in pink by dykeevans (Rated E)

Buck forgets that he and Eddie made plans to hang out until Eddie shows up and Buck's in the middle of laundry day.

His laundry day outfit consists of a small pink crop top and grey sweatpants.

Eddie loses his damn mind. Me too, though, me too.

the distance to the stars by cloudydaisies (Rated G)

“Didn’t know you were seeing someone.”

Buck just laughs. Like, honest to god giggles. Eddie is stuck fighting off doubly massive waves of butterflies and confusion, all while Buck just gazes down at him.

“That’s cute,” he hears Buck mumble, just before climbing into the truck, calling Eddie after him.

-or, everyone knows eddie is dating buck except for eddie, literally.

Something Old, Something New by dumbhuman (Rated E)

“Damn, I love weddings!” Buck’s face lit up as he closed the door.

If asked later, Eddie wouldn’t have been able to explain what came over him in that moment to make him ask the question. Or, at least, he wouldn’t have wanted to explain. The exhaustion was an easy excuse, but he knew deep down that it wasn’t a real one.

“Why don’t you come with me?”

one of the few things by thatnerdemryn (Rated G)

five times that Eddie tells someone else that Buck is Christopher's legal guardian plus one time he finally tells Buck.

I Didn't Know I Was Lonely 'Til I Saw Your Face by HMSLusitania (Rated T)

Total strangers Buck and Eddie go to couple's therapy together to get out of the therapy requirements their captains have placed on them.

things we shouldn't do by Ingu (Rated T)

“Why is everybody taking my relationship status so personally? Can’t I be fine with being single?” Buck said.

“Hey, you don’t have to say yes, be sad and alone if that’s what you want,” Josh replied. “But, I’m just saying. I’ve seen photos and this guy is volcanic levels of hot. Also, single dad, super cute kid. Saves lives for a living like you. I think you should give it a go.”

(the one where Buck and Eddie accidentally get set up on a blind date with each other, and everything snowballs from there)

Keeping It In The Family by Wolves_of_Innistrad (Rated T)

A young man shows up at the firehouse looking for Buck. Turns out Javier was a Bartender with Buck in Mexico. He’s back in LA, looking to reconnect and very flirty. Cue Eddie realizing Buck is not as straight as he thought.

kiss me (like your ex is in the room) by rebeccaofsbfarm (Rated E)

Eddie Diaz gets drunk and protective and signs up for a fake double date to get back at his friend's ex.

Leave the Light On (I'll Be Coming Home) by HMSLusitania (Rated M)

An accident on a call leaves Buck with custody of Chris after Eddie is… missing presumed.

While they navigate their new family circumstances -- and fight to stay together, despite Eddie's parents' best efforts -- a John Doe wakes up in a coma ward with no memory of his own life beyond the knowledge he has a son named Christopher and, somehow, he needs to get home

All my Buddie AO3 bookmarks

As I said this fandom has some very talented people, some of my favorite Authors's Tumblrs below, I recommend all the things they wrote and their blogs are very good.

@elvensorceress, @hmslusitania, @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels, @extasiswings

For gifs:

@arrenemris, @skylessnights (very lovely AU gifsets)

@from-nova(good gifs & content)

For Podfics: @mistmarauder everything she ever read is amazing, her podfics are high quality and she has a very lovely voice and her presence calms me down lol I recommend it

I'm sorry there are a lot more people but I'm kinda in a rush haha most of the people I follow are amazing, but the ones I mentioned here are enough to get you started or entertained for a while.

Buddie fics are amazing, this pairing has spoiled me so much, everyone I met because of it is nice and so active and talented.

Sorry mutuals if I forgot someone! 

I hope I helped Anon, have fun!

(Tell me if any link is wrong please, thanks)

[tom-holland-parker]

Drafted

Summary: Bucky has to tell you that he leaves tomorrow but not without leaving you with plans for when he gets back

Pairing: 40s!bucky x reader

Word count: 1344

Notes: Broke my heart while writing this because we all knows what happens after he leaves and Jesus Christ it just hurts to think about how y/n is gonna feel when she realizes he not coming back...ughhhh

Masterlist

Bucky had made a lot of choices in his life, but deciding to keep this a secret was the hardest one. The letter remained in his sock drawer for weeks as he contemplated ways to tell you, his guilt eating him alive as the days drew closer

“I got drafted”

He’d practiced those words over and over again trying to find any way to make them sound different. Trying to make them sound better. Maybe a larger part of him was hoping it would all go away if he avoided it but he knew it wouldn’t, not with the way the war was going.

So now here he was with 1 day left to tell you the truth

Bucky took a deep breath as he knocked on your door, smiling when your mother opened it, “Good Evening Ma’am”

“Hello James, Y/N is just getting her shoes on, please come in” She said as she opened the door wider. Bucky stepped in, enjoying the familiar smell of your mother's apple pie coming from the kitchen, “So where will you two be going tonight?”

“We’re going to the Stark expo tonight” You replied as you came down the stairs. Bucky couldn’t help but smile at the sight of you, wearing the pink dress he loved on you and the necklace he gave you for your birthday last year. “Well look at you all dolled up for me” He said as he kissed your cheek. 

“Not too bad yourself handsome” You chuckled, “We should get going, Mom I’ll be home by curfew love ya”

///

The night was amazing, filled with fun as you and Bucky looked at all the new inventions. As the night went on Bucky glanced at his watch nervously, “Doll we gotta go” You chuckled grabbing his hand, “My curfew isn’t for another two hours”

Bucky shrugged his shoulders as you both quickly jumped into the car he borrowed from a friend, “We’re actually making a quick stop before I drop you off” He said as he began to drive. Your brows furrowed, “Where exactly are you taking me Mr. Barnes?”

He chuckled, “if I tell you it’d ruin the surprise”

You jokingly huffed in disappointment as you looked out the window, watching as the apartment building quickly turned into houses, you were definitely far from home, “Bucky where are you taking me?”

“Don’t worry you’ll like it.” He stopped driving after a few more minutes, parking outside of a small white house with a match white picket fence boarding the lawn. You glanced at him, your face filled with confusion, “A house?”

He chuckled pointing towards the house, “One day I’m gonna buy you that house” You smiled, moving closer to rest your head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arm around you. “And we’ll have two kids,” he continued, “and a dog”

“And fireworks every fourth of July” You chimed in, picturing your picture perfect life with Bucky. He’d come home after a long day of work, greeting you with a kiss. You guys would throw a huge barbeque every fourth of July, ending the night with fireworks and s’mores. You watch from the back door as Bucky plays catch with your son while you cradle the sleeping baby girl in your arms.

So many scenarios played out in your head as you rested in his arms, it wasn’t until he placed a small kiss on your temple that you were pulled out of your imagination. You looked up at him, his lips meeting your for a quick kissed before he pulled away from you, “I have to tell you something”

“What's wrong?” You questioned, noticing the look of nervousness and worry on his face. He took a deep breath, here goes nothing, he thought to himself, “I got drafted. I leave tomorrow”

The words hit you like a ton of bricks, you see the countless of boys being drafted and every night you prayed that Bucky would never be added to that list of boys, but as luck would have it here you were. You stood silent, utterly speechless as your eyes filled with tears. Trying but failing to blink them away as you shook your head in disbelief, “No you’re lying. That’s not something to joke about”

Bucky’s heart broke as he watched you process the words he said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know how to tell you”

“How could you keep this from me?” You wiped your tears, it was useless though, the tears just kept falling. Bucky sighed pulling you into a hug before gently holding your face with his large hands, “I’m sorry, If I could change it I would but don’t worry I’m going to come back to you no matter what it takes”

You swallowed the lump growing in your throat, “Promise?” 

He smiled, kissing your forehead, “I promise”

///

The next day you got up extra early, catching Bucky at the bus stop surrounded by the other drafted men who were saying goodbye to the people they loved, “what are you doing here?” he said as he pulled you into a tight hug, spinning you around before letting you go.

You chuckled, “Did you really think I’d let you leave without saying goodbye?”

“No, I figured you’d find some way to see me before I left.” He said with a smile, “So what do you think” he took a step back so you could see him fully. It hurt to see him in his uniform but you couldn’t ignore how good he looked. 

“Well aren’t you a dreamboat” You joked, “I need a picture before you leave”

Bucky rolled his eyes, but smiled for the camera as you took the picture, you smiled as the polaroid printed, “Gotta show our future kids just how handsome you are” 

“Well it’s only fair that they get to see what a catch their mother is” he grabbed the camera, pulling you closer to him as he took a picture of the both of you. “Keep it” you chuckled, putting it in his pocket, “that way all the pretty nurses will know your mine”

Bucky rolled his eyes, “You know I only have eyes for you doll”

“Alright boys, on the bus” the tall man shouted. You watched as everyone said their final goodbyes. You looked at him, not having the guts to say goodbye, “two kids and a dog” You said quietly as tears slowly trailed down your face. It was an unusual way to say goodbye but it was good enough for you.

Bucky nodded, kissing your forehead before pulling you in for a final hug, “and fireworks every fourth of July”

Present day

It took a long time for Bucky to gain the courage to actually go to the museum, every time he thought about going he would chicken out. Too nervous to think about that time in his life. It took Sam weeks to finally convince him to go and now here he was, staring at the exhibit dedicated to people that died in the war.

He rolled his eyes as he saw his face on the screen, “James “Bucky” Buchanan Barnes, died during an ambush. His remains were not found, his only belonging found was a picture many say he kept in his pocket at all times. This picture can be found at the end of the exhibit on the photography wall” He heard the guide tell the group of people nearby. 

He sighed making his way to the end of the exhibit, searching the wall for the picture. It took a few minutes but there it was. There was obvious damage, wear and tear from years of being tossed around but he could still see you. He could still make out all the lines on your face, the shape of your lips, the shape of your eyes. He smiled, taking out his phone to take a picture of it. He took one last look at it before deciding he’d had enough for today. He’d come back another day to see you again

[slashersgostabbystabstab]

Halloween Oreos (Michael Myers x Reader)

Original Ask: How about some snack time with Micheal uwu sharing Halloween oreos with his s/o or someone me whose getting close to him. Perhaps they buy him some huehue

_____________

Haddonfield had become a rather quiet place following the Halloween murders, the following years becoming somewhat grim.

Halloween was no longer the same, or at least it was something that made the residents of Haddonfield tense up. Even after thirteen years, people were sometimes too afraid to speak the Boogeyman’s name. At least, people finally came out of their homes, as if the plague was already over with. After thirteen years, one could have said that the Boogeyman was no more.

October had finally come around, and this year Haddonfield was gifted with a veil of fresh white snow on just the third day of the month.

You grunted as you fixed the plastic bags in your hands, the mittens you wore making it somewhat difficult to properly hold them.Today was the day to go out for groceries, a task you only did every now and then due to your current living condition.

“Need help there?” you heard a voice behind you, prompting you to turn and see the cashier that had rung you up in the grocery store.

“Oh! Ah,” you gave a nervous chuckle as you once again fixed the plastic bags. “I-I can bear, thank you though.”

“I really don’t mind lending a hand, especially in this weather.”

“It’s alright.” you insisted, especially after a chill ran down your back, your eyes glancing around as an uneasy feeling came over you. “Thank you, I really appreciate it. I just need to get going right now. Somebody’s waiting for me.”

“Ah, I see.” he nodded, taking a step back as you sighed in relief. “I’ll leave you to it then.”

“Thank you, have a nice day.” you nodded as well, not bothering to watch him leave as you knew the consequences of such things.

As you headed to your car, you took notice of a news crew that had stationed itself across the road, right at a sidewalk that led to another array of stores. The crew was specifically focused on a hardware store that had its glass windows broken, even the farthest eye could see the bloody handprints that were splattered on the walls inside as well as other blood prints.

You shivered at the thought of what had gone down inside, instead focusing on the trunk of your car before loading everything inside. Not paying much attention to the camera crew, or at least not wanting to do so, you hopped into your car to drive out of town. But not before taking a good look at your surroundings, on edge about the eyes that were possibly watching your every move.

_____________

Home was a rather lengthy ride, no more than an hour’s time thankfully, but the searching for it was what made up for that isolation you required. Considering the situation you lived in, your partially preferred living arrangements lie in the woods outside of town, where things were calm and quiet.

Hopping out of your car, you felt as the snow began to fall once again. This meant that in the morning, the veil would be much thicker and there was no going out, especially as your small home was situated in a deep part of the woods.

Hearing your boots with every step, you unloaded the groceries which would definitely be taking more than one go. You made your way towards the cabin in front of you, coming to stop after walking onto the porch as your eyes caught crimson.

Right on the wood were boot prints, every single one as red as the blood from the hardware store.

Your eyes followed the trail that led to the door itself, and you took notice of it being ajar.

Dropping the bags onto the porch, you placed a hand on the door to cautiously take a step inside. The creak of the door was enough to have you jump back the slightest bit, especially as your eyes continued to examine the trail of blood that led into the kitchen.

Now, you knew not to act like a girl in a horror movie but…

“Hello?” you called out into the emptiness of your home, holding your keys close to either fight with them or immediately flee to the car. “Is that you-”

Soon enough your scream pierced the air as you jumped off the ground, this due to feeling a rough hand clasp onto your shoulder from behind.

Once you had turned around, you groaned at the sight of an older man that stared down at you with dead eyes.

“Michael!” you yelled at him, then fixing your jacket which had slightly crumpled up at the shoulder where you had been grabbed. “I thought you were someone else.”

The man before you in no way flinched, not even bothering to blink as he continued to watch your every move.

“You leave in the middle of the night without a word and leave me alone all day.” you mentioned before passing by him, knowing that he turned his entire body to always be facing you. “Well now that you’re done with scaring the hell out of me, I’m done with the groceries. Won’t need to go out until January I think. I hope so, since it’s starting to get pretty cold out.”

Michael Myers, the Shape or Boogeyman of Haddonfield, stood right at your door with not a care in the world. If anything, your door to your house, was his door to his house. It had been this way for quite awhile now.

A few years actually.

It was surprising that he was not wearing his mask, his blue and clouded eye completely fixated on your figure as you grabbed the bags right at the entrance.

Once you had grabbed the bags at the door and then the remaining ones in the car, you shut and locked the door before being followed by Michael into the kitchen.

After he had spared you years back, Michael had come to act like a cat. Always with his nose on the lookout for what it is you would be feeding him. Hilariously, that was just how Michael reluctantly came into your life.

“I haven’t prepared anything since I’ve been out most of the day.” you admitted, ever so quietly laughing at the soft groan that rumble in Michael’s throat. “I did find some sweet goodies at the market though. Especially at WalMart.”

Michael didn’t always understand the things you talked about, but he was always listening. Always watching. Learning.

“They have these new cookies for the season. The orange looks kind of funny, but I’m pretty sure they taste the same as the originals.” you mentioned as you set the groceries on the counter, looking through the bags as you began to put everything in its place. “I also got you some stuff to shave off that scruff.”

Michael’s eyes darted down in an attempt to look at his chin, instead seeing you hand placed under it as you softly rubbed your thumb on it.

“Though I have to admit that it’s starting to grow on me.” you smiled before making your way back to the groceries. “Just like the greys in your hair.”

It really had been a few years since you had met Michael, a relationship forming after a pretty good while. He was in his mid-twenties, practically a middle-aged man now who hadn’t been found by the authorities this entire time thanks to you.

As you began to prepare a hot beverage for yourself, and Michael who you knew would ignore it but drink it behind your back, you knew that Michael was watching you intently. His eyes were glued on your hands that grabbed a pumpkin you had purchased. Somehow, he had not even realized the large vegetable as you brought it in.

“Found a recipe you might like, especially for the cold.” you spoke before grabbing a kitchen knife, one that piqued Michale’s interest but was not enough to have him snatching it away due to its size. “Especially with all the pumpkins that are out now.”

To his dissatisfaction, you set the knife down besides the pumpkin on the counter before facing him.

“But before I make that, I’m gonna go change. These clothes are starting to make me feel stuffy.” you removed your jacket as you walked around the counter and out the kitchen, for once not being followed by Michael who was now focused on the knife you had left behind.

Knowing that you would be too focused on finding one of his shirts to wear, he approached the counter to take hold of the knife, bringing it to his face to admire how it shone under the kitchen light. He first held it pointing upwards, but changed it so that he was instead gripping it with the blade pointing down. His head craned to the vegetable beside him, and instinct got the best of him.

“I see you got started with the pumpkin.” he heard your voice, turning around after having jabbed the knife down into the pumpkin which had more than a simple wound.

Michael grabbed the knife once again to pull it out, his entire body facing you once again as he tilted his head at your figure.

Your eyes fell to the knife that contained a bit of pumpkin residue, even a seed or two managed to slip out due to Michael’s brute strength. Now your eyes were on his blank features, and you couldn’t help but give him a smirk.

_____________

It wasn’t often that you lit the fireplace as to avoid any attention from outsiders, especially authorities who had honestly given up on the search for Michael despite his former psychiatrist’s demands, but you believed that tonight was just the night for a warm fire.

Despite the cold weather, you only wore one of Michael’s shirts with socks, perhaps a little something on your bottom. You figured that there wasn’t an entire need for covering yourself when Michael was your human blanket, and one that refused to come off you.

With all of the day’s work done, you sat on the couch, or more like Michael’s lap as he sat on the couch. Your legs were crossed as your torso was constricted by Michael’s strong arms, his chin casually laying on top of your head as you ate the last of your pumpkin soup.

Both pairs of eyes stared up ahead, almost next to the fireplace where your TV screen was placed. You were both watching the moving pictures, or at least Michael resumed that when you made comments about the movie.

“That’s so cheesy, no girl would scream and faint on the spot if she saw a monster.” you ever so slightly shook your head, Michael’s chin too heavy to actually complete the motion. “At least, nowadays. However, that looked like that one scene from the latest Child’s Play movie where the guy has a heart attack.”

It was an old monster movie kind of night, your mood demanding it and Michael no doubt being curious. Frankenstein actually seemed to catch his attention.

The man’s eyes glanced down at you as he saw your arms stretch out with your empty bowl, attempting to put it on the coffee table in front of the couch. This of course was quite impossible with Michael holding you back, his grip on you only becoming tighter as you were managing to barely escape his grasp.

“Michael!” you groaned, pulling your head forwards until his arms made a ring around your hips after you were able to snake the top part of your body out.

As you reached out to set the bowl down, you felt Michael bury his face right into your back before rubbing himself all over and taking in your scent simultaneously.

“I just want to put the damn bowl down.” you wheezed, eventually releasing a sigh of relief when your glass bowl safely landed on the table. But it made you also pleased to have grabbed the plate you had prepared along with the bowls of soup, making sure it or its contents didn’t slip out of your hands as you adjusted your body to the former position.

Michael gave a grunt as he placed his chin on your head again, this time making sure that you had no way of escaping him.

“You wanna try one, Michael?” you lifted the plate just a bit, having Michael peer down at the plate that contained black little circles that smelled weirdly to him. “They’re the newest Oreos. The cookies I mentioned earlier.”

You placed the plate on your lap, wishing that that was enough to hold them up while you took one of the cookies and offered it up to Michael.

“I don’t have any milk right now because you’re not gonna let me get any, so take it like this.

Michael squinted at the cookie, the orange filling enough to have him blinking at least once. In this state of his, you were able to break free and spin your body in place so that your legs were no longer crossed but instead on either side of Michaels’ waist. The plate of cookies was safely put on the empty space of the couch so that nothing could fall.

Having a mind of their own, Michael’s hands wrapped themselves around you as he once again stared at the cookie.

“It’s just a cookie Michael.” you giggled, lowering it before taking a bite out of it yourself.

Michael’s eyes landed on your lips, watching the way they moved as you chewed the cookie piece. Tiny black crumbs adorned your lips, every now and then shifting the more you chewed.

You watched him as well, finding it how funny his curiosity was. So, you popped in the remainder of your cookie before eating it as well, now feeling one of Michael’s arms leave your waist.

Instead, his fingers brushed against the warmth of your skin as his nails carefully scraped your cheeks. The tips of his fingers now coming close to your lips, his index finger actually on your bottom lip before it pulled it down and open.

“Michael,” you breathed out, knowing that Michael was merely observing the crumbs left on your lips.

Blinking up at Michael, you saw as he brought his face down to yours. His lips now dangerously close to yours as he continued to play with your bottom lip, making your breath hitch as he neared more and more.

Soon enough you closed your eyes when Michael closed the gasp, but not with his lips but his tongue.

Your eyes shot open as you felt his tongue lick the corner of your lip, continuing onto your lips themselves. You placed your hands on his shoulders, gripping onto them as you felt his own twist around the shirt you wore.

Your lips had already been parted from the shock of Michael’s actions, that good enough for Michael to slip in his tongue to get a taste of your mouth.

He didn’t care about your nails digging into his shoulders but in fact enjoyed it, pressing your chest against his as his tongue continued to explore your cavern, tasting every bit he could. But before you could follow along with his treatment, Michael retreated himself and looked down at you with half-lidded eyes that matched yours. Well, his didn’t have as much emotion as yours for he was difficult to faze of course.

“Michael?” you sighed at him, thoughts clouded with what just happened. You were then snapped out of it when Michael let go of you with one hand, reaching to the side where the plate of cookies was.

He had grabbed another one, bringing up in between your faces and leaving it there for just a moment. Soon after, he brought it to your lips, scraping it against them before slowly slipping it in so that you could take a bite.

As you chewed the cookie, Michael took the other piece into his mouth, leaving the two of you with crumbs on each of your lips.

His tongue slid out once again, licking the crumbs off of his lips before you got the memo.

The flush on your cheeks was more than enough to warm you up on this chilly October night.