#things we say in the dark

[jessonel]

"Things We Say in the Dark" by rubber_soul02

typeset by @redpandabindery

this is my first time attempting to bind anything

[reading-cat]

Top 5 Worst Books of 2023

The criteria for "worst" include but are not limited to: genuinely badly written, I had too many expectations and was disappointed, just not my thing, boring and "idk I just felt like it".

5. Witchmark by C.L. Polk

Great idea, bad execution. As in, the writing isn’t very good. The pacing was extremely weird, alternating between excruciatingly slow and too quick. And there’s a fae (they’re not called fae, but you know what I mean) jump-scare.

4. The Gilded Wolves by Roshani Chokshi

I saw this being recommended as similar to Six of Crows. It is not. Yes, there’s a heist and some found family vibes and multiple POVs and queer characters, but that’s about it. This book just didn’t live up to my expectations. It wasn’t necessarily bad, it was just extremely average. There were too many main characters to properly develop all of them. The heist itself was a mess of illogical puzzles. I liked the fact that there’s some critique of colonialism, but it also felt very surface level. I’m just disappointed and kinda sad about it.

3. Things We Say in the Dark by Kristy Logan

This book has been sitting on my tbr since 2019, when it first came out. I finally read it for a book club and god, was I disappointed. Kristy Logan really said "Ooooh, look how vague and mysterious I can be" and then just gave us a bunch of half finished badly written stories. There were some good ideas in there and even stories that I somewhat liked. If only they had had the chance to develop a little bit more.

2. The Element of Fire by Martha Wells

As a big fan of Wells’ Murderbot Diaries, I decided to check out some of her other works. The Element of Fire is the fist of her books she’s ever published and you can feel it. This was tedious and boring. The world and the characters are very underdeveloped. And the fairies. I was not expecting the fae. I did not want to read about the fae. There is a flying castle though, so that’s nice.

1. Yoshi and the bird by Duran Sakagawa

I have a friend who really likes birds and Japanese and Korean authors. Every year, we try to do a buddy read or a reading challenge together. Yoshi and the bird was this year’s victim. Honestly, I was expecting a cute story about a boy who picks up a bird who fell out of its nest. Maybe a slightly melancholic life lesson. Maybe some veiled social commentary. Not this. What was this. How is this one of the most out of pocket violent and depressing books I have ever read. And when I say violent, I mean it. Why. There was absolutely no need for that ending.

[SPOILERS]

I’m sorry, bird suicide??? I can deal with bird religion, but suicide? And Yoshi too??? He’s, like, 12 if not less. What are you doing. What is this book doing.

[siggytumbles]

Things We Say in the Dark coded.

DRACO: *mindlessly flirting with Hermione*

HERMIONE: *flirts back*

DRACO:

HERMIONE:

DRACO:

HERMIONE: aren’t you going to say anything?

DRACO: I didn’t think I’d get this far.

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

[secondbeatsongs]

hey, don't cry

tumblr is the new pdf! ok?

[xxplastic-cubexx]

was talking to my brother the other day after i rewatched dark phoenix and he was like 'why is everyone so mean to charles in this movie?? were they always this mean to him ?? is it cause he's bald now- he lost his pretty privilege??' and i fear i havent recovered

[protect-namine]

the way everyone has a dislike in their profile that actually says something integral about their character. lu guang doesn't like plans getting messed up, cheng xiaoshi dislikes loneliness, xia fei with owing favors, vein with lying...

and then you have liu xiao, who dislikes... cilantro. and fish mint.

(shakes fist) (putting him in a glass jar and shaking vigorously) learn to be vulnerable!! tell me something about yourself!! I guess him liking movies lines up with the theater metaphors, and there's him liking chess, but that. doesn't count methinks

[post-it-notes7]

Please tell me this will be a happy ending

dearest anon, only time will tell

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 79

  When Pariah was awoken from his slumber, he wasn’t exactly expecting it. One was never expecting to awaken when they were supposed to be sealed for eternity after all. He also wasn’t expecting for the reason the sarcophagus was even opened to be a pair of literal infants. A pair of very sick infants.

  One was a newborn ancient for Realms’ sake! Two years dead, if that, and the other- Where was their guardian?! Who had let an obsession get that bad?! How long had he been sealed away that no one had caught an obsession turning toxic and harmful towards a ghostling?! 

  Why was he even sealed inside this area of the zone?! Why had his Keep been moved in the center of one of the zones where ghostlings formed?! He’d never harm a ghostling, but if he’d been any madder (And he knows he had lost it near the end there, that he’d gone too far as he cracked under the weight of the Realms, he’d had an eternity to realize) it would have been a catastrophe! 

  Who has been in charge, the observants!? … What the fuck, that was supposed to be rhetorical! No! They’re good for paperwork but they seem to have failed even at that and- what do you mean they’ve sealed Clockwork away?! 

  The already traumatized Time Primordial who was in this type of area specifically to care for ghostlings, and was now being prevented?! How long has this been going on- No! He’s fixing his realms-damned kingdom before he even thinks about conquering other ones, because who the fuck let it get this bad!

   Pspsps, here little sick ghostlings, he’s trying very hard not to hurt you but you are very tiny and he has been locked away for a long time so please stop squirming…

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

This Fatal Kiss

spooky whimsical YA fantasy romance

a water nymph bound to the river where she drowned desperately wants to become human again, by gaining a freely-given kiss from a mortal

a brooding boy from the local town who exorcises meddlesome spirits is constantly trying to get rid of her - but after he messes up an exorcism she blackmails him into playing matchmaker for her

….but he also has a crush on the boy she chooses (who has secrets of his own)

bisexual MCs, developing polyamorous relationship

[luck-of-the-drawings]

[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]

saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.

[scificrows]

i like to make fun of murderbot for being all "i hate everyone, i don't care about anything or anyone, fuck off" while simultaneously caring very much about the people around it and the situations it finds itself in. i love how it "accidentally" ends up caring quite a lot about the friends it makes along the way. but i think something that i tend to forget is that murderbot actively decides to care - at least at some point in its story.

idk, as a person that struggles with depression, this paragraph from artificial condition really resonates with me. prior to all systems red, murderbot had contracts. it had routine and it had protocols. it knew what it had to do to just get by, how to perform so no one would notice it had disabled its governor module. it was deeply depressed, yes, but it was functioning (for lack of a better word). in artificial condition, murderbot's routine is gone. it cannot go on in that state of numbly going-from-contract-to-contract, putting in as little effort as possible, consuming media to cope. that option is gone because it escaped (and note that escaping the company was not an active choice, it kinda happened to it). murderbot has two options now: it can either gather all its energy; actively do something new and difficult and distressing; change something in its life and try. or it can let the numbness and the emptiness take over and stop trying. if murderbot wants to survive as a rogue secunit, it has to try. no matter how difficult that is. the wording in that paragraph really hits home for me. the way the non-caring sees an opportunity to slip in and to take over. does murderbot even care? does anything really matter? is anything really worth the hassle? wouldn't it be so much easier to just let your mind slip away a little, to go numb, to be passive, to watch media and wait for things to happen to you? wouldn't it be nice to stop thinking and struggling and feeling complicated things? to stop making an effort? you've been dealing with a lot lately and maybe it's time to just shut down. maybe you'll just take a little break. just slip deeper into this chair and start the show. time flies when you're not paying attention. trying is exhausting. who cares if you don't do the things you wanted to do, you were supposed to do. it'll be fine. let's just ignore those things for now. just let the non-caring take over. just stop thinking. you can deal with the aftermath later. just watch your shows. who cares. but murderbot cares. it decides to care. it decides to fight with all it has and i think that is so brave. and i think in the later books caring is less of an active decision for murderbot. once you start caring, it's easier to keep going than to stop; and murderbot, for all its "i'm a grumpy rogue secunit, leave me alone" behavior, knows just how important caring is. so it's not that it doesn't know what's happening; rather, it lets itself care. tl;dr: caring is not the default for murderbot, it's just the more difficult of two options. and it decides not to take the soft option. it decides to struggle. it decides to care. and so it does.

[mantisgodsdomain]

"Hornet is Void" theory, not in any sort of intentional, engineering-your-other-babies or whatever way, but in a "PK had awful policy with Void cross-contamination and it meant that Hornet came out with a handful of VERY conspicuously void-y characteristics that everyone tries to ignore because no one actually knows for sure where they came from and acknowledging them in any formal way could lead t a political shitshow" way.

[fighting-naturalist]

idk i just thought he looked real pretty lit like this 🤷‍♀️

[garvalhaminho]

i unfortunately have to disagree w the "will herondale makes history as first present father figure [relating to the protagonist(s)] in tsc". have we not seen julian blackthorn in action. he was acting like a full-on dad at 12yo

[xxplastic-cubexx]

WAIT WAIT WAIT CHERIK MPREG IS CANON

i cannot stress enough how canon cherik mpreg is, yes my friend