#things I'd say to myself

[abyssmita]

Girl stop writing delusional love poems for your imaginary lover and go write your goddamn school notes or something

[stil-lindigo]

lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)

if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.

--

no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.

I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.

I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.

If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.

[lazylittledragon]

isn't it weird how if you get up at 7 or 8, do your work all day, then have free time and go to bed at 11 that's absolutely fine

but if i said i get up at 10, do fun stuff in the morning then work in the evening and go to bed late, i could be called lazy, nevermind that i'm getting just as much or MORE work done as i would in a traditional work day

[hajimemiya]

THEY'RE SO ADORABLE AAAAAHH💞💞💞

JUST LOOK AT THEM AND THEIR SQUISHABLE CHEEKS I WANNA KEEP THEM IN MY POCKET🥹❤️

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

if you struggle with mental health, one piece of advice i would genuinely give you is learn to knit.

or crochet: something repetitive to do with your hands, assuming you're capable of it. if you're like me and learnt to knit as a kid but let it lie fallow for a long time, it may be that starting a large, simple project (for me it was a cloak, but a blanket could work too) gets you back into it. or maybe doing something smaller, idk. i personally found socks really hard for a while because they felt smaller than my cloak but weren't getting Done quick enough for me. as i've sped up i find it more interesting to knit socks.

regardless, a repetitive task is great for emotional regulation (also see: autistic stimming), and something that you can look at and go hey i've done something, unlike simply using a fidget toy, can also help to pick your mood up when the brain is being cruel.

it's also useful as a conversation starter or distracter if you don't know what to talk about. if you're wanting to talk to older people also you're more likely to reel them in with knitting (i work better with older people, and 99% of people who ask what i'm knitting are older than me). it also gives you the opportunity to not make eye contact because you're busy knitting, even if you're still carrying on a conversation. if you're absolutely stuck for conversation you can count your stitches and people might stop bothering you.

if you have trouble focusing without doing something with your hands, you can knit! i knit a lot in church, and it helps me to focus on what's being said.

i probably have more reasons you should pick up knitting, but i can't recall them right now, so yeah.

[5-turtleducks-in-a-trenchcoat]

Everytime I listen to the Ancient Rome Sidequest it destroys me emotionally. But who knows, maybe somewhere there's a world where nothing terrible happens and it's just Sasha and Grizzop having fun adventures in ancient Rome.

[yesmissnyx]

Hang in there, babes 💕 Somebody out there loves you so very much, and wants to see you to thrive.

[necrotic-nephilim]

What's so fun about BruJay as a ship is Jason's sheer obsessive devotion to Bruce. Jason is possessive over Bruce, to the point he doesn't care about the deaths of others so long as he has Bruce's attention. A part of the UTRH arc this isn't talked about enough is that Bludhaven fucking explodes mid-way and Jason won't let Bruce see if Dick is alive.

batman (1940) #650

A lot of discussion about UTRH paints Jason as this anger-driven cold, calculating machine up against Bruce when it's so clear that his love for Bruce is what drives him at his root, even if he won't acknowledge it. He says it himself, he would've done anything if it was Bruce who'd died instead of him and his anger is rooted in that possessive devotion not being reciprocated.

batman (194) #650

BruJay as a ship always to be, to some level, unrequited. Even if Bruce loves Jason back in that way, he'll never be that obsessed with Jason. Jason will always view Bruce's love for Dick or Tim to be a distraction, proof that Bruce isn't dedicated enough to him. Jason has the need to always have Bruce's attention, even when it could come at the cost of Bruce's other loved ones. Something something cannibalism as a metaphor for love in how Jason wants to consume Bruce's whole existence. He can't let Bruce leave him again, can't let Bruce love or grieve anyone else. Forcing Bruce to choose between Jason and the Joker isn't just about confronting Jason's killer, it's about confronting the other person who exists as this duality with Bruce and consumes so much of Bruce's life. That's the role Jason wants to fill, calling himself Red Hood and forcing Bruce to look at what he's become. But still loving Bruce and wanting more than anything for Bruce to reciprocate that love in the way that Jason understands. I just think it's good soup and rife with Dynamics that are underexplored with them.

[kidokear]

Peak Gabv1el development (for me, at least) is when someone calls V1 an object and it's Gabriel who go off on this someone, like, he will not allow anyone to entertain that notion. This angle will defend V1's autonomy and sentience with his life.

I think it's sweet and it's a great way to show how far their relationship and bond (romantic or platonic) has gone. Gabriel going from calling them a thing to not letting anyone to call them that and even taking offence (probably more than them) to someone thinking of them like that? How can I not love this? He's the king of fast character development. XD

[xenomorphicdna]

On the string propaganda

Heeellll yeah

Bestie is an entire PLACE

I look at those guys and let me tell you the soul of that thing ain't just in the puppet, it's in all the neurons carrying the thoughts and emotions, it's in the power rails that serve as the heart. All the memories in the memory conflux and all the numbers we see flicker across displays, the flux condensers, the puppet; a little avatar.

No way these massive machines see life the same way we do. They have their own experiences and senses and things they hold dear. A world we can't imagine, a way of living we couldn't even comprehend.

I could never tear an iterator apart to be just a puppet. Who am I to decide how's life supposed to be enjoyed or perceived?

You treat your creechurs however you want- I ain't gonna dictate that. But damn, hearing the thrums and buzzes of the linear systems rail? They are alive with so much power, these mechanical beasts are exactly what they should be.

[bedlamsbard]

for love of god I wish I hadn't trained my brain into generating sequel ideas.

[disposal-blueeee]

[thevioletcaptain]

as someone who normally reads a script over on the tv writing site every day while eating breakfast like it's the morning paper, but who didn't have time today because i'm trying to meet a deadline on my own script that i've been slow to work on due to an assortment of fire related stress as a resident of los angeles this week........ i am experiencing some severe fomo over these new spn script drops

[gotchibam]

I've been doing some test streams this past few weeks and I think I want to try it for real this time! Nothing fancy, just a simple art stream & some lo-fi music 🎶

I might be able to host one later (maybe a couple hrs from now?) so just look out for the post if you want to join! Also made a twitch & youtube channel for hosting & archiving future art streams so you can also follow me there if you'd like to get updated 😌

[ingravinoveritas]

Babe not wanting to put more attention on this pathetic person but there’s someone here on tumblr who made a mock account of you

Hi there! I've been debating whether to address this publicly, but I received numerous DMs about this last night and have been made well aware of the blog in question.

For context: Over the last few days, the person behind the mock blog has used their main account to make their presence known on my blog, having reblogged one of my posts just to add a nasty comment to it, replying to another one of my posts and attacking my followers, and sending me a hateful Ask, all in escalating succession. This culminated in the creation of the new account last night, which had a name that was an almost identical dupe of my blog name.

To be clear, I have no intention of linking to this blog publicly, as this person's goal and aim seems to be for me to engage with them--someone I do not know, and to whom I have never spoken or responded in any capacity. It also seems that the URL of the blog has changed from being a copy of my blog name to something else, and given that I had a lot of people DMing me indicating that they reported the blog to Tumblr, my guess is that the name change is the result of that.

The only other thing that I will say regarding this is that I'm obviously not thrilled that someone created a blog for the purpose of harassing me (while ironically accusing me of harassing Georgia and AL, despite me repeatedly stating that I do not follow either of them on social media and am strongly against anyone leaving harassing comments on any of their accounts). At the same time, however, I have been subject to far worse in my previous fandom--most notably, one vile incident where someone falsely accused me of distributing pornographic material to a minor, and another incident where the same person contacted my employer in an attempt to get me fired in the middle of lockdown in 2020. So all things considered, this blog is relatively mild in comparison.

And while I'm enormously grateful for the support that I have received from so many kind folks, I would urge you to not engage with this blog on any level, and please especially do not send this person threats of any kind on my behalf. I've said many times on my blog that people are welcome to disagree with me, and that I'm happy to hear the opinions of others who do not share my views as long as they are civil and respectful. What this person is doing is neither of those things, and they've made it clear that engaging with them would be a fruitless endeavor, but that still does not make it okay to send anyone hate. And if the desired outcome here is attention, then the best course of action would be to not provide it.

Again, my deepest thanks to you @phantomstars24 and to everyone else who has let me know about the situation and offered their support, as it means more than I can describe. I'm hopeful that we can continue sharing the joy so many of us have felt over Michael and David these past few years, and leave the rest where it belongs...

[jtl07]

OMG that last Part of your prompt with the candle wax got me thinking of another prompt: Bea either doing Ava doggy style or on top of Ava whispering "good boy". Just some good old needy/sub Ava wanting to be Beas best boy and service Bea.

y'all really using this as an opportunity to make me stretch and practice things i don't usually write huh? here's a quickie i tried to quickly write, hope it doesn't suck lol

"very good, ava."

ava nearly drops the drink she'd just made, a moan catching in her throat just as beatrice slips past her from behind. she can feel beatrice's low chuckle against the back of her neck, the barest brush of beatrice's fingertips at the bottom edge of her crop top and that's all it takes for ava to be transported to last night: face down in their bed, biting the sheets to keep quiet because she can be good, she can be quiet; because she can take more, she can take it again, again, again -

" - you good, ava?" hans asks, eyeing her in concern.

ava whimpers; coughs to cover the sound. "i'm good," she finally manages to eek out, knows the frantic nodding and manic cleaning isn't helping her case. she has to move, has to do something to take her mind off of how her underwear is drenched, how her thighs are sticky, how her clit is throbbing and her cunt is empty -

"ava, a word please?"

"yes, bea." it's breathless and desperate but ava can't bring herself to care as she all but runs to chase after beatrice's voice. she nearly trips up the stairs, clips her shoulder against the doorway, but it doesn't matter. she'd crawl through glass, set herself on fire - anything to get to beatrice at this point.

when ava arrives at beatrice's makeshift office in the attic, however, she finds it empty. "bea?" she calls out, turns around -

only for her mouth to be taken, parted, filled; a vessel for beatrice's tongue and their shared moans. "you've been so good today, ava," beatrice murmurs as she runs her teeth down ava's neck and her palms up her breasts; pinches. "i think you deserve a reward, yes?" the sharp points of pressure coupled with that specific question jolt through ava and escape as a whined "yes" followed by gasped "please."

before she can register what's happening, ava's being bent over a stool, her shorts and underwear shoved down barely past her hips, the tip of beatrice's strap sliding just inside. ava chokes off what would have been her begging, what would have been her pleading; holds herself still. she knows the rules, knows how to be -

"good, ava. very good."

and then beatrice sinks inside, fucks her fast and precise, and it's all ava can do to hold on to the stool and her rapidly deteriorating control. ava's focus narrows to the essentials: the wet slap of skin against skin, the sharp grip of beatrice's fingers at her waist, the swiftly building tightness in her belly, the brightness growing behind her eyes.

be good, ava thinks as she tries to match beatrice's thrusts with the rocking of her own hips when beatrice speeds up her pace. be good, ava thinks as she scrabbles for balance when she feels herself start to tremble. be good, ava thinks, mindless and near delirious until beatrice finally, finally gives her the command she's been waiting for: "come."

her orgasm is a lightning strike of pleasure, a scream barely contained to a high-pitched whine as she arches in beatrice's arms. it goes on for seconds; it goes on forever.

then slowly, surely, ava's consciousness returns to her, piece by aching piece. she returns to herself with a shudder, with a sigh echoed and pressed gently against her cheek.

"everything good up there?"

ava slumps over the stool, laughing quietly. swears she can hear beatrice's eyeroll from behind her. "fine, hans," beatrice calls out, lifting herself up slightly to project her voice down to the first floor, "nothing of concern."

the change in position, however, causes the strap to shift - and ava is too slow to bite back her moan.

she feels beatrice's eyes on her; feels beatrice's hand threading its way through her hair. ava takes a breath, readies herself to be pulled along; readies herself to be good once more.