#they’re not even fix-it fics because canon doesn’t need fixing

[ghostdrinkssoup]

it’s crazy how much hannibal suits canon compliant fics that either change one key detail or diverge in some minor way between seasons and how that deviation radically changes everything while also maintaining echoes of canon scenes, only now they exist within a new context. I’ve seen so many fics like that and they’re all so cool because they honour canon while also using our knowledge of the story to rework certain moments and change whole plot arcs. it’s amazing what people come up with

[millyditty]

I stg

If nobody writes an angsty Nobamaki post canon fic where they start to get close and then Maki

OBVIOUSLY TRAUMATIZED STILL

Suffers from comphet for the first time in her entire ass life because the guilt and shock of the finality of her actions finally kick in now that everything has slowed down so of course she dumps Nobara right there in the gym after engaging in flirting for the last three hours and of course Nobara is lucky enough that she has her boys taking care of her after the really really fucked up breakup because Maki should just go to therapy dude

But Maki, because she’s MAKI, is a stubborn ass for a few years because of course she can make herself care about Yuta, who

By the way

Is the only one she has the right emotional distance from to feel at least semi safe with

And Yuji and Megumi proceed to continue to be the very best friends of a baby lesbian that Nobara could ever possibly need, even help her get better at the dating thing and good at finding girlfriends that WONT dump her ass after three hours of flirting just when she had THOUGHT Maki was finally letting her in but anyway, she does deal with her shit until she’s a whole ass adult helping them raise their freaking adopted ass kids that they refuse to admit they’ve adopted

Even though she’s labeled “auntie Kugisaki” and shit, they’ve adopted another damn kid, annnnddddd

Yep, another one, Jesus, how bad would it be if they could actually breed? Would both of them just be walking around pregnant constantly?

Bottom ass slut that he is (she knows, she’s walked in on them, dear god, there had been dicks and spit and other disgusting stuff everywhere, dear god, they were sluts) Megumi totally has the biggest” put a baby in Itadori” kink of all time, she’s absolutely fucking sure of it

But anyway

Nobara actually deals with her shit but still can’t find The Perfect Girlfriend she’s been looking for for YEARS, not that she’s still upset with how Maki has all but ignored her for YEARS, brushes her off every time they cross paths in the school with her usual dismissive attitude and blank stares from across the room

And meanwhile

During these years

Poor Maki realizes that she’s rocked her own shit and she doesn’t even KNOW how to even BEGIN to reach out to Kugisaki again, and she sure as hell doesn’t just go to therapy because Yuta is totally all the emotional support she needs (right up until he also randomly adopts a child and disappears) and maybe Panda skims a whole bunch of complex PTSD books between missions because she’s just clearly not doing well at all

They would have enlisted Toge to be his assistant but there’s only so much emotional processing that he can help Maki with when trauma terms are definitely not on his sushi safe words list

But anyway

FINALLY shit hits the fan when Maki gets her actual PHYSICAL shit rocked for the first time in years because of course their friends and coworkers force them to go out on this mission together but whoops

Turns out they picked the wrong damn mission to play matchmaker but they’re so SICK of this endless lesbian drama they’ve been watching for TEN FUCKING YEARS HOLY SHIT MAKI GO TO THERAPY

And boom

Maki realizes right then that she can and will fucking DIE without saying what she needs to say because suddenly her control issues matter a whole lot less when her Kugisaki is trying to stop her bleeding and is telling her to please not die and is actually crying the way she hadn’t been that night when they’d been just overwhelmed fucking kids and Maki dumped her, when she’d only smiled bigger and bigger and even made jokes so that it would be easier for Maki to finish the dumping process so that they could both just be done with it and move onto pretending neither of them cared about it anyway obviously

And whoops

All of a sudden Maki is promising her like a lead character from one of Kugisaki’s ridiculous dramas that she won’t die, promising Kugisaki that she’ll fix this, promises that she’s sorry and that she’s spent this entire time hating herself and wishing she could take it back and that she hadn’t meant it when she’d told Nobara that “them” was a phase that they needed to just get over because they were “adults” now

Because she’s not over it, she hasn’t been over it

And she’s convinced, fingers refusing to let go of the other woman’s blouse, passing out with Kugisaki’s mouth against hers so that she can at least give Kugisaki this when she says IT for the first time ever, that she’s never going to get the chance to say it again so it has to be now, so she repeats it until she can’t speak anymore because she’ll never get to say it again

Because she’s dying

Because she’s only twenty nine and she’s dying in Kugisaki’s arms like Kugisaki has already forgiven her for every shitty dismissive comment and every stupid childish glare that she’d used to keep Kugisaki away and it still doesn’t matter because she’s dying

Dying right here in Kugisaki’s lap, the reality of it a bleak reflection of how Kugisaki had always inched into her own lap years ago when they were alone, of how she’d been doing it that evening but Maki had panicked

That night she had panicked

She had stared down at the damaged flesh that Kugisaki’s eye patch couldn’t completely cover and thought about Mai and thought about feeling—

So she hadn’t

So she panicked and didn’t, but it hasn’t saved her from any of the misery of the last ten years

And now she’s dying, and Kugisaki at least isn’t pushing her out of her lap like she had Kugisaki, and it doesn’t matter because she’s dying—

Then she wakes up

Then she wakes up and Shoko is staring down at her like she’s a fucking moron which

Considering Shoko’s shitty and borderline fucking abusive relationship with Utahime before she actually got her shit together finally that last time a few years back is really fucking rich, okay

But then Megumi leans over her too, and looks so fucking gay and judgmental that she really really wants to punch him, and wait— why is he holding another new child as said child rambles on and on about…

Ghost dogs? Sushi? What?

Where the hell did THIS ONE come from, they were supposed to be out doing a super dangerous exorcism, what the hell is wrong with them, why are they trying to adopt children like puppies, why don’t they just get fucking dogs like a normal gay couple?

And then she realizes she’s not dead

That she is very much alive

So she looks past the most annoying lesbian she’s ever met (and she has NOTHING in common with Shoko, thanks) and the most annoying gay cousin she’s ever met (thank god she’ll never be anything like him with a new picture on his phone of Yuji sleeping or smiling or training literally every goddamn day, the man is obsessed) and there’s no sign of Kugisaki anywhere

No, there’s her charging cord and her favorite drink tumbler with ancient stickers sitting right there, so Kugisaki must have fled the room at some point—

Oh no

“You’re an idiot,” Megumi tells her, voice dripping with disdain as he fixes the little kid’s homemade knit dog hat with floppy ears that she knows full well Megumi must have made but will still blame Itadori for because he’s such a stubborn motherfucker even after all these years so Itadori must actually get off on it honestly

“You’re an idiot,” the strange child tells her confidently, huge black glasses taking up the parts of her face not swallowed up by the knit dog hat

And that’s how Maki realizes she can’t take any kind of easy way out this time, that she had in fact

Said

Those things

Out loud

To Kugisaki

Oh no

Oh no

And this is when Itadori bursts in looking worried and shaking his head, tells Megumi in a rush, “she wont let me in but Panda’s going to try to break in there and actually get her talking, I think he’ll have better luck, he’s really good at this stuff—”

Itadori stops when he sees her awake

Maki stares at Itadori

Itadori stares back at her wide eyed, looking cornered

The teenager that rushes in after him, the very first of the children that Megumi and Itadori both insist they have not adopted (despite taking them all to doctors appointments and tucking them in at night and all the pictures that Maki has seen displayed in every single corner of their ridiculously minimalist house that may actually have the best shower that Maki has ever used but she sure as hell will never admit it) looks at Maki

His eyes narrow

Shoko says quietly, “holy fuck, oh my god” and starts shoving nicotine gum into her mouth desperately

The kid jerks his head, dark eyes snapping toward Megumi

“Pleaaaaaaassse let me at least try to beat her up, please let me, please just this once, it’s my only chance I’ll ever have to do it, she can kill me with her pinkie, I know, but I’ve never heard auntie cry this hard ever, pleeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaasssseeeeeee let me fight her—“

Maki gets it then, puts the pieces together

Oh no

Oh no

And so this becomes how Maki has to finally grow up and fix her actual mistakes, which were surprisingly not murdering (almost) her entire biological family in cold blood—

But breaking the heart of the only person she’s ever cared about and has missed every day and thinks about every single night in her shitty bed after she takes her shitty shower in her shitty apartment that she refuses to move out of or spend the money or energy on to improve because none of it seems to matter

But she’s alive

She’s not dead

Her head jerks, finds the nest of fuzzy blankets that Kugisaki had left when she must have fled, the hint of lipstick left on the straw of the pink tumbler, and now she can smell her, the exact same mix of sweet orange and sharp floral that she’d been wearing that evening in the gym when Maki had ruined both their lives

Oh no

… come on, guys I fucking NEED this shit

[qprpbj]

it makes me physically ill to think about months after Johnny and Dally’s deaths, the boys are sitting at the dinner table and Ponyboy makes some offhand comment about Darry hitting him and Daryl just breaks down. all the walls crumble and he’s a mess, because he keeps pushing down the fact that he believes he is a bad person. and then Pony is at a loss for what to do because he’s never seen Darry like this, but Sodapop is getting flashbacks to Throwing In The Towel and seems to know exactly what’s happening. I am so invested in Ponyboy and Darry fix-it fics because I think Darry feels soooo much guilt for hitting him and he keeps bottling it up. like oh my god. just- so sad

i am so invested in THIS can you please write a fic abt it fr. i think he def carries a lot of heavy guilt for a longggg long time like years after canon and never really gets over it even once pony starts coming to peace. therapy isn’t really a thing for them tbf but goddd do these boys need it. BUT also at the same time i think it’s sort of a situation of like. darry’s not perfect either and he’s still darry, he still gets needlessly angry sometimes and takes it out on people even if they don’t deserve it, even if he doesn’t really know why he’s doing this to himself and to others. idk grief and healing and abuse cycles and (intergenerational) trauma. allllll the things play a role it’s not as easy as ppl think it is!!!! he doesn’t want to hurt pony or fight but sometimes he yells and he can’t help it!! its who he is and there’s generations of abuse and trauma working against him and since its the 60s he doesn’t have the verbiage or knowledge of how to break trauma/abuse/etc cycles like we do. like it’s absolutely not as easy as one traumatic event occurring and suddenly they’re perfect siblings again. darry i love you 🙁

[doodlegirl1998]

ngl im a mineta defender until the end, now before you jump me let me explain

his behavior is obvi disgusting (lets also not ignore the fact that hori has said hes his self insert) BUT IT IS EXTREMELY EASY TO FIX!

a lot of kids and teens who have similar behaviors often have parents with the same beliefs. not to say that this is always the case but it’s more common than not

which means that they’re raised not knowing that their behavior is wrong. they see it as acceptable, and not only that, but *expected* of them

it is an extremely easy thing to rectify. of course sometimes it’s harder depending on how much the behavior has been ingrained into them, but at the end of the day it is *fixable*

he was failed by his parents for encouraging his behavior and he was failed by other adults/teachers for letting it continue

also it’s not that much of a stretch to say that he was probably heavily bullied. he has a very prominent lisp, he’s a heteromorph, and he’s extremely short. i’ve seen several ppl who hc that he has dwarfism and i definitely agree with that

aizawa doesn’t seem to give a shit because he never takes any action to try and discipline him for how he acts

also im sick of the shinso replacing mineta fics. the only good thing abt shinso replacing aoyama is that ppl don’t have an excuse to replace him.

like for the love of god it’s not that hard to simply change his character. it annoys me to no end. bc i like mineta a lot! his quirk is interesting and he has a lot of potential as a character but he’s reduced to a creepy pervert bc every shonen anime needs to have at least one 🙄

tl;dr stop bashing mineta and start bashing hori

Hi @the-jello-bowl 👋

Stop bashing Mineta and start bashing Hori... hmm. You know what? That's a sentiment I could get behind.

After all, the ultimate problem with Mineta lies in his writing.

At the start of the series, Hori wrote him too perverted with too little of any other redeeming or sympathetic quality. That impression stuck - so a lot of fans want him out of heroism and out of 1A.

This is fair because Mineta's behaviour is triggering for many people, and he could make a dangerous figure as a hero and an adult if left unchecked and if his perversions worsen.

While I understand why, Shinsou replacing Mineta is a lazy way to do take Mineta out of 1A, since Shinsou canonically hasn't shown he deserves to be in the hero class nor shown to have good interactions with 1A as a collective.

While it doesn't make his behaviour excusable, you are right when you say Mineta was failed by the adults around him. Especially his parents and Aizawa, as you pointed out, they were the ones prime positioned to fix this behaviour, yet they did not. We don't know what his parents are like for certain, but I believe his dad was likely a verbally and emotionally abusive misogynist who Mineta idolised. And we know that Aizawa fluctuates between negligence and using his hero grade weapon on Mineta as discipline... so there is no consistent messaging there. Yikes.

Instead, Hori implied Mina had to clockwork orange Mineta to stop him being a pervert which... took away Mineta's whole agency in his decision to stop being perverted. (Did his character even get better at all by his own freewill really if Mina had to do this? Will that 'brainwashing' break one day? Here is another reason to hate Hori's writing.)

Hori also doesn't expand on the things that could make Mineta sympathetic, the lisp, the possibly being bullied in the past, the likely self-confidence issues. He doesn't expand on Mineta's backstory or expand on why he wants to be a hero, really (if it was just girls, he would have quit by now, let's be real).

It is a failure in Hori's writing that he doesnt give Mineta (as a HERO student) a redemption arc where he realises just how awful he's been to the girls and vows to make up for it. This moment could have even begun because Mineta stops his perversions due to wanting to be more well-liked and like Midoriya (who he looks up to). The building blocks are there - Hori neglects them.

TLDR: Mineta is a character that could have had potential, and his quirk is interesting. He had potential for a character redemption arc, potential for an interesting backstory, too.

The reason why Mineta is hated is because Hori wastes all his potential to have a lazily written creepy pervert throughout the majority of the story.

Good traits such as Mineta's bravery only make a large appearance later, and the perversions disappear too late in the story to really salvage his popularity.

Not only that, but being a hero is a privilege, not a right. Mineta has got to show through the story as a member of 1A why he deserves to be there and why he has the character for Heroism - unfortunately Hori fails to do this for him because of the reasons I mentioned above.

A lazily written cowardly perverted character could have worked in a minor villain character, but this is instead in a member of 1A, who we are meant to root for adding to the cognitive dissonance of his character.

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buddie: One Shot and Multi-Chapter Fanfics

Fanonwriter2023 on AO3

Where CANON and FANON collide!

Multi-Chapter

6B Speculation

“I gave you a son and a family!” - 60.6K words; Rated Mature:  Eddie tells Buck he already gave him a son and a family and Buck realizes he misunderstood but they stop talking after their argument and they won’t have time to fix it before they almost lose each other again.

After 6x12 Speculation

Come with me to Italy!  - 25.2K Words; Rated: Teen and Up Audiences:  Buck and Eddie take a 10-day trip to Italy so they can heal together but Eddie doesn’t know Buck’s also thinking about relocating to Italy to become a firefighter.

After 6x15 Speculation

“From here on out, it’s all a gift!”- 22.4K words; Rated Teen and Up Audiences:  Buck feels like the person he just met “sees” him for who he is and what he’s been through while Eddie feels alone and admits he doesn’t want to be anymore. Everything they’ve been searching for has been right in front of them for years and the universe is tired of waiting. To help them realize “it’s all a gift”; it hurls another shared trauma in their direction but will it be too late for them to appreciate it?

Season 7 FANON Speculation

“I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!” Currently 25 chapters are available - 973.1K Words; Rated: Mature: This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!  Months after Buck and Eddie were hit by the same lightning strike; they’re still struggling with the aftermath of it. But before they make their love confessions, they’ll spend time getting to know themselves as individuals first. Eddie learns to enjoy the simple things in life as he participates in activities on his own and with new friends while Buck learns the rest of the 31-year-old deep dark family secret about his conception and birth. Their journey to forever is still a work in progress but once they finally admit they’re in love with each other, everything that follows their love confessions will be spectacular. This fic will take Eddie and Buck places the show refuses to go. This is a multi-chapter fic that will be posted one chapter at a time.

One Shots

The Buckley-Diaz Family

Let’s go visit daddy! - 2.1K words; Rated General Audiences:  After a tough call, Eddie visits Buck at the firehouse.

The Buckley-Diaz Family Budget - 7.6K Words; Rated General Audiences:  After completing their weekly grocery shopping and realizing inflation has increased the costs of all the food they usually purchase, Eddie returns home, calls a family meeting and explains to Buck and Chris their family needs to tighten their budget.  But something important happens that prompts Eddie to break the family’s ‘no spend challenge’.

You’re the youngest firefighter to ever make Captain within the LAFD! - 5.6K words; Rated General Audiences: Buck’s nervous about his first day as Captain of the 118 but Eddie’s there to encourage him because he knows Buck can do it.

Married

“Always remember how much I love you!” - 16.2K Words; Rated Mature:  Eddie receives a terminal medical diagnosis but he hides it from Buck.  Buck can tell something’s wrong and when Eddie finally tells him what happened, they work through it together.

“You Mean the World to Me!” -  7.8K Words Rated: Teen and Up Audiences:  After a chance encounter at the scene of an accident, Eddie decides to surprise Buck and they fall even more in love than they already are.

“In sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part!” - 20.0K Words; Rated: Teen and Up Audiences: While Eddie’s working a 48-hour shift, Buck notices something that requires immediate medical attention but he doesn’t tell Eddie about it until he gets home from work. Throughout this difficult time, they’ll hold onto each other like they always do and they’ll fulfill every aspect of their marriage vows, especially the part about “in sickness and in health”.

Dating, Engaged & Love Confessions

Let me love you - 3.3K words; Rated General Audiences:  Or Eddie doesn't think he deserves to be loved by Buck but he's wrong and Buck proves just how wrong he is.

I love the way you heat things up in the kitchen - 4.2K words; Rated Mature: Buck is supposed to be teaching Eddie how to bake a cake but they end up leaving the uncooked batter on the counter as things heat up between them.

“Believe half of what you see” - 7.7K Words; Rated: Teen and Up Audiences:  With only a few weeks left until their wedding, Eddie sees Buck having dinner with a woman and he assumes he’s not enough for him and he thinks he never will be. But did he actually see what he thought he saw?  

6x11 Speculation

“You’re my angel... oh angel” (Eddie prays) - 1.9K words; Rated General Audiences:  Eddie can’t lose Buck, his angel and the love of his life.  After Buck’s wheeled into the ER, Eddie goes to the hospital’s chapel to ask, no plead for him to live.

Chris talks to “his Buck” - 2.2K words; Rated General Audiences:  Chris talks to “his Buck/second dad” while Buck's in a coma.

Season 7 FANON Speculation

“You wanna go for the title?” - The Rematch - 7.5K Words; Rated Mature: Eddie asks Buck for a rematch to the video game they played three years ago. However, the stakes are much higher this time because Eddie's playing to win Buck’s heart.

Alone Together - 13.3K Words; Rated: Mature:  While Chris is away at Summer Camp, Eddie plans a weekend getaway for him and Buck because he’s going to prove to him that he does not suck at dating.

[solangelo]

I was wondering, do you have any recomendations on some long fics? Like, not just one chapter? Sorry if you had already posted something abou that. Anyway, thanks!!! (Really like your blog <<3333)

Absolutely!! I pretty much only read on Ao3 anymore so all of my recommendations are going to be there, but if others want to tack on their own recommendations in the comments they're always welcome to do so :)

A few things,

I tried to put content warnings on the bodies of work as I see fit, but some of these I read over a year ago and haven't looked at since so I apologize if I've missed something!

Additionally speaking, I've marked anything in which contains characters having sex with a red heart emoji ❤️ as it should be viewable on light and dark mode, across multiple forms of devices (ios vs android, etc) and should be readable to screen readers as well; As per previous notes on this blogs, any explicit depictions of characters having sex will also have them being explicitly over 18. Now without further ado-

I'm a huge fan of rabbit_soup's "Healing Takes Two" series, it's 13 pieces in total some of them are oneshots and others are multichapter but they all fit together making it a large body of text. The plot extends from Nico's three days in the infirmary to the early stages of their relationship and still seems to be ongoing with the author taking on rewriting some of their older pieces.

arum scarce by GalwayGirlo [16/20] AU ❤️:

Nico wakes up paralyzed following a motorcycle accident. Maybe Will Solace can help him get some feeling back?

(cw: suicidal ideation, a suicide attempt, adult having a relationship with a minor, "mafia stuff")

When I Get Home to You by 2nd2ndalto [10/10] Canon Compliant, Time Travel ❤️:

Will’s brow furrows."N - Nico?"

It’s impossible, this boy can’t be Nico, but the name falls from his lips without real conscious thought. Nico is 38 years old and probably sitting at home in their living room, hopefully having figured out how to fix the clogged dishwasher line, which is what he’d been planning on doing when Will left early this morning.

(cw: conversations about suicidal ideation and related topics, and young nico is involved so canon compliant trauma of his comes up as well)

talk your talk and go viral (i just need this love spiral) by wrongcaitlyn [34/34] and a part 2 currently at [2/?] chapters, Celebrity AU ft. Trans Nico:

“Keep telling yourself that,” Will says quietly, because even though the door is closed, speaking any louder would seem wrong. “You’re too harsh on yourself. If you wrote songs or something, you’d easily get on the Billboard Hot 100. Dad would help you. I would, too.”

“Promote it to your seven followers?”

“Yes!”

Nico laughs, and then Will is joining him, and they’re closer than before, but it’s nothing unusual. It’s been this way since before stupid feelings and stupid crushes, and Nico would be damned if he let it change just because of that.

(cw: alcoholism, childhood abuse and neglect, character death, car accidents, transphobia/homophobia/generalized queerphobia, gender dysphoria, suicidal ideation and related topics)

peach tea by ghosttotheparty [5/5] AU ft. Latino Will:

Will brushes his thumb over the side of Nico’s hand gently. His skin is soft. Nico’s fingers tighten on Will’s. It kind of feels like neither of them wants to move. Will doesn’t mind.

He sits up after a moment, but Nico doesn’t let go of his fingers, so he lifts the arm that’s awkward between them and sets it behind Nico, leaning back to rest on it. Nico just looks at the tapestry.

or; Will falls in love with the new kid.

(cw: mental health struggles, ptsd, anxiety/panic attacks, depression, grief, and character death)

What Could've Been Lights by athaleablaire [18/18], AU - I can’t remember if they have sex in this, rating is teen and up and all characters are over 18 but enter at your own risk:

In Will's eyes, he really has it all. A job as a surgeon at an amazing hospital, great friends-- what more could he ask for? Everything is going great until a man walks into his emergency room half-dead. In the mission to save his life, Will gets a little more than he bargained for.

(cw: injury and recovery, accusations of substance use)

a shadow in the rising sun by demigodbeautiies [9/13], AU Royalty, Arranged Marriage:

This is a story about the Ghost King.

Will Solace (crown prince in the Seventh Kingdom, politically useless as it may be) does not particularly want to be married to a thing of nightmares. He doesn't really have a choice, though. When does he ever? He allows his father to push him led into this politically advantageous, beauracratically necessary arrangement without too many complaints, and resigns himself to the fact he will be marrying a tyrant out of the tall tales his mother used to tell him when he was a boy.

Except then he meets his husband - a boy, and one younger than he is at that! - and realises that he has absolutely no idea what to expect. All he can hope for is that no one tries to kill him.

(cw: character death, character injury?)

NICO Centric:

Lethe by Eridans [8/8] Canon Compliant with a part 2 at [16/16]:

He's ten and ninety simultaneously, his mother was murdered and his sister is a stranger. He's got a deck of cards that he holds onto like a lifeline and an Italian-English dictionary that's old as hell and crumbling, but it's not as old as he is, and that makes him laugh.

The River Lethe was supposed to take away their memories, but Nico remembers his past, his days at home, the times he spent with his sister and mother at parades Mussolini hosted, where Maria sang the national anthem. The river tried to take away everything Nico cherished, and it could have been pure desperation or grief that made him remember his past.

Nico didn't know.

(cw: I started reading this fic over 8 years ago and haven't read it since it's last update 3 years ago, expect canon compliant events and themes to occur but otherwise proceed at your own risk, exercising caution and compassion for yourself where necessary <3)

WILL Centric:

Solace by solisaureus [11/11], Canon Compliant:

solace (n.) comfort or consolation in a time of distress or sadness.

solis (n.) the Latin word for "sun."

(cw: author includes their own content warnings at the start of each chapter!)

sprinkler splashes to fireplace ashes by whimsicalMedley [13/26] Canon Compliant ft. Trans Will Solace:

Contrary to his general disposition, William Andrew Solace was born in the middle of an October hurricane.

Or, Growing up is hard. It’s even harder when you’re the son of the sun god.

(cw: author includes their own content warnings at the start of each chapter!)

Hopefully this is a good place to get you started, nonnie!

[rhaegang]

What do you think could've saved Oliver and Felix? Or do you think they were doomed from the start?

OOOUGHHHH this one…

I think that, given their exact circumstances, they were doomed from the start.

By that I mean, it is 2007. They are both men. They are both incredibly young and fragile in terms of ego. One of them is the son of an entitled, landed House in one of the few remaining blood-lineage aristocracies in the world. The other is not.

When people say SB isn’t good class commentary, I don’t know if they’re really thinking about what it IS saying about class. Bottom line, Felix’s social class dictates his entire life. His education, his dress, his mannerisms, his mode of speech, his aspirations, his opinions, his politics, his obligations and more — they are all informed by his class, and all of it serves to make him untouchable to someone outside his class.

Add in the homophobia of the era & the fact that same sex marriage wasn’t going to be legalized in the UK for another 7 years, even if Felix had just been Nouveau Riche, there would’ve been almost no chance for them.

If it was set today, in 2024, there are many more prominent and respected out gay men including in elite social positions. There is also more precedent for very high ranking members of English nobility marrying outside their class—a 2024 Felix could point his finger at Harry & Meghan and say, “If a member of the royal family can marry outside class AND race, there’s no reason why I can’t marry a man from Merseyside.”

All of this is really focusing on the circumstances completely outside either of their control which prevent F & O from being able to acknowledge and openly explore a romantic attraction. Changing these things requires author powers, which is why we gotta have fanfic.

Using our author powers, if we address those barriers in some way, only then can we start to think about what it would take to get these two characters to work. For MAD/BOT, I dealt with the circumstances by just keeping them both alive long enough to get them to a more permissive era (2022) and having them mature past the “young and fragile” state of canon setting. They do still have to deal with the fact that they’re both men and they are in a cross-class relationship (which means they’re always going to deal with some bullshit and certainly their social standing would be impacted and Oliver would never truly be accepted by the elite as “one of them”). I think it’s kind of generous to imagine that Felix would willingly damage his family’s reputation, but I also think he’s maybe selfish enough to do it anyway…

I think that there’s no real explanation for all of Felix’s behavior in canon if he doesn’t harbor some repressed feelings for Oliver. I think he recognizes them much sooner than Oliver recognizes what his own feelings are, and Felix actively represses. Maybe if Oliver had understood earlier what it was he wanted, and had been brave enough to come on to Felix the way he does other characters, something could have happened. I don’t think it would have made either of them happy for very long though, because it would have been something they needed to keep secret.

And at the end of university, Felix would be going on to start his life in society doing whatever faff he would do that isn’t working for a living, and there wouldn’t be a place for Oliver in his life then. Maybe they’d keep it up, stay in touch, and Felix surreptitiously leads a dual life that everyone sort of knows about but never mentions because of politeness/civility. Maybe they could even be happy like that, somehow. But they’re both very possessive, and I find it hard to imagine them being okay with something like cover marriages and long distance.

Ultimately, I think that as people — they can work. They can even get past the lies and the hurt. But it’s not only their own mistakes and flaws that work against them to make Saltburn a tragedy. 😔

And that’s why they are truly a fix-it fic writer’s dream.

[thestobingirlie]

re: that compromise ask (diff anon but heyyy right there with u) i was literally JUST thinking abt smth similar, about how esp in future/reunion fics, it’s always steve crawling on his knees for forgiveness for how he used to be, and eddie like. heaving a big sigh and “going back on his principles” or whatever to forgive steve. and steve like having to prove he’s better now or whatever which like. fine sure yeah steve was a high school bully. he threw slurs around and he definitely objectified women (although come on it’s high school social strata everyone was objectifying everyone, ain’t none of those babies had enough brain cells yet to see other people as people, that’s just being fucking 16) and he was a bitch, not arguing there.

but like 1) he was fully a child, he was literally a teenager, mike is an asshole too and no one is arguing he can’t possibly grow up or be redeemed, or that he needs to repent to earn love? like it’s one thing in canon era fics where they’re all still growing up, but i haaaaate in future fics when steve is a whole grown ass adult man still expected to grovel for the sins of being 17,

and 2) canonically eddie is the judgmental one??? i mean steve literally apologized and made amends on screen but if that’s not enough look at just purely going off the way the kids interact with them! they’re completely comfortable with steve. yeah he rolls his eyes and huffs and complains about their “nerd shit” but he still drives them to dnd nights! he still does that lame ass handshake with dustin! he still listens to all the stuff they ramble about, and you know he does it every time even when we don’t see it on screen, because they’re totally comfortable doing it! no doubt, no question steve will listen and support them, even when he doesn’t understand. dustin comes to scoops knowing without a doubt that steve will drop everything to listen to him talk about camp, and be excited about it! steve doesn’t give a shit about science camp, but dustin does, and that’s enough for him! yeah dustin is excited to talk about suzie, because girls are common ground with steve, but steve doesn’t know he met suzie when he takes his break, he just wants to hear about how dustin’s nerd stuff was going! he doesn’t have to understand or relate, he just wants them to do the stuff that makes them happy, and they know that. they trust him to listen even if he doesn’t get it

but the way mike and dustin were so nervous to ask eddie to postpone hellfire, even after months of knowing him, shows that they don’t trust him to let them have interests outside of his understanding. and they shouldn’t! he’s proven that he veered so hard into “nonconformity” he just reinforced the same social boundaries he claims to hate. everything with eddie is “us v them,” and like! i get it! i think it’s a complicated dichotomy and makes for an interesting character! i’m an eddie stan first and a person second ok listen i love the man. but if anyone needs to beg on their knees for forgiveness for being a dick in high school, it’s the guy who ruined BOTH of lucas’ favorite activities in one fell swoop by projecting his own insecurities and fake social rivalry onto a literal child. (i’m still so mad he managed to force lucas to miss the campaign finale he’d worked so hard for AND made sure that none of his friends or family were there to watch him play basketball all at once i’m never over it. i’m frothing at the mouth. apologize to lucas or meet my blade)

but there’s this trend where people are like “oh man eddie’s such a good person for looking past king steve and loving steve anyway! he’s rehabbing the jock! he’s fixing him!” fuck you. fix your damn self. the duffers’ childish ass hatred of “non nerds” is sooooo pervasive in this fandom it’s so gross.

oh my god, this is just beautiful. i literally couldn’t put it any better.

i wish we had gotten to see eddie repent for what he did to lucas, because honestly, i still hold it against him.

what’s especially funny to me about it is that steve’s sins (in s4) were over two years ago, eddie’s were last week lmao. like, one of them needs to go around apologising and it’s not steve.

but yeah! the kids have an ease around steve that they don’t around eddie. classic example: all the kids go to steve in s3, not even pretending to be polite or actually ask, and just pound on the bell until he comes to let them through the back of scoops to watch a movie. they don’t worry about his reaction. steve could literally get fired doing this, but they know he’s going to do it, and feel so comfortable that he won’t have a bad reaction, that there isn’t any hesitation.

when asking eddie to postpone a game, mike and dustin are shaking in their little boots. they’re flinching and looking away, and trying not to actually ask. those aren’t kids in the presence of someone comforting!! this isn’t a guy they would think deserves steve begging on his knees. if eddie was being a prick about steve’s past for no reason other than to hold some moral superiority over him, the kids would get pissed off.

if anyone is getting rehabilitated in their relationship, it’s eddie, not steve!! because being a jock isn’t inherently bad, and being a nerd isn’t inherently good, no matter what the duffers may be trying to tell you.

[skreebs]

Thinking about the ableism toward Jouno in the BSD fandom and it genuinely pisses me off so badly I want to hit people. I’ll be perusing the tag and looking at stuff and then I’ll see some random pop ups for AO3 and get shit like this

Now I don’t 100% know the context of this screenshot, for all I know this fic could be about him before he lost his sight, but either way it got me thinking and thinking got me angry and being angry means i need to complain. Jouno is already pretty shit blind rep, I’ll be honest. He’s the basic stereotype of “blind character has super senses because they’re blind” but can we give blind people literally ANYTHING else??? jesus christ. I’m pissed how BSD writes his blindness so as per usual I had to attempt to fix all of that myself, but attempting to fix it and removing it entirely are NOT the same and one is VERY MUCH SO WORSE. Again, not talking about this fic specifically but other ones I’ve seen that do this, or those “Jouno if he could see” edits. Spoiler alert, blind people can open their eyes.

I dont know why BSD and every other piece of media is so adamant on not giving visually impaired and blind characters white canes and just giving them "super senses" to get around it. It’s incredibly stupid and abelist to portray stuff like this. Disabilities are not super powers and thank GOD they didnt make that his ability but they still gave him that aspect and I guess it can be excused with SOME lore stuff like maybe he got really good senses from his surgeries but it just sucks that it happened that way at all? And then they don't even touch on how horrible having incredibly hightened senses to the point you can HEAR blood would be?? can you imagine hearing everyone internal organs around you 24/7 EVERYDAY? No one talks about that at all. That would be so fucking overwhelming its genuinely insane. Jouno is such a dear character to me, but genuinely when I remember him in canon without any of my headcanon explinations it’s just really sad that all I can say about him as representation is "well.. it could be worse".

I know there’s going to be at least one person saying “theres good blind rep in other shows though!!” Yes! I know! I’m super glad about that! But ignoring the bad ones doesn’t help much. You need to point out the issues to get good results. Recently, and by recently I mean about 17 hours ago, I watched/listened to the first episode of Daredevil, once with audio descriptions, and then after I watched without AD and had captions. I’m super glad that things are more commonly getting AD—it’d be a bit pathetic if the show with a blind main character was not accessible to blind people—but even with Daredevil, Matt still falls a bit into this stereotype.

Don’t get me wrong, seeing a character with a white cane has me absolutely elated, but from the single episode I’ve seen and what I’ve heard, he apparently also has some sort of super senses, and I know in the first episode he can hear heartbeats. I think super senses as a power is fine, but it’s just the fact they always give it to the blind characters. I, myself, am not blind, nor am I really visually impaired, I just wear glasses. However, as someone with a special interest in disabilities and also as someone that is disabled in other ways, seeing disabled rep fall into stereotypes over and over just really bums me out sometimes.

I think Daredevil is great so far from this one episode, I’ll probably be looking at more of it, but that is definitely just one gripe I have with it. I think Charlie Cox putting a bunch of effort into the role with the method acting and talking to people in the blind community and just all of that is amazing, I love to see that in anything, it’s just urrghh that it’s so hard to find a blind character that doesn’t have some kind of insane superpower senses with things. It reminds me of when characters with autism are so frequently portrayed as geniuses or their autism is only acceptable if it helps the neurotypical cast with “gadgets” or something. I dunno. Hard to explain, it’s 11 at night and I’m tired. Just don’t be ableist in any fandom or in real life. I shouldn’t have to even point out why this shit is disgraceful.

[jiminjeonging]

hi it’s me again, back by request with more age re mj :) i’m actually already a fic writer myself so i might turn these into a something™️ eventually, but for now i’ll just brain rot in your asks if that’s okay!!!

jm and mj have known each other for so long but at the same time they’re still learning about each other. jm knows mj so well but sometimes when it comes to regressing, she can misread mj’s actions as misbehavior when there was no intention to act out. during a schedule, mj gets restless cuz her head hurts and picks at her fake nails and her dress is itchy so she can’t stay still and her feet hurt in the heels they wore for the pictorial - so overstimulated and frustrated that she talks over her unnies and starts to rip at her clothes, and it’s actually ningning who tells her to calm down before audiz can say anything. but it’s too late. jm already sees her like this and sees a brat who won’t listen. when they wrap and mj is the first in line walking back into their dressing room, jm is in leader mode, whisper yelling at mj that her behavior was unacceptable while the cameras are rolling, but when she finally reaches out to grab mj and turn her around and sees how dejected mj looks, she realizes that mj has dropped. thankfully they’re done for the day now, but mj can’t even speak bc she’s so occupied with trying to take off all the complex makeup and intricate clothing she has on, can’t even process jm apologizing for going into leader mode when what she needed was her unnie to soothe her. jm makes it up to her by helping her undress out of the pictorial outfit, takes down her hair for her, dresses her up in the hoodie that she originally brought for herself to wear, and mj sits on jm’s lap as jm carefully wipes off the makeup from the day- it’s then when mj cries and cries, thinking that she upset her unnie by being frustrated with everything because she couldn’t handle it and she’s so tired that she wants to nap right there in her lap, but jm doesn’t want mj to fall asleep thinking that she’s still upset so she whispers sweet nothings into mj’s ear until she nods off. jm picks her up to lay her down on the couch, but not before giving her a light kiss on the cheek and fixing her hair. the change of clothes that mj was originally going to wear fits a little tight on jm, but when she sees mj laying there in her hoodie, she doesn’t feel too bad about it as long as her baby is comfortable and safe

RAAAHHH THANK YOU!!!! pleaase do brain rot i love these so much! i love mj age regressing and its canon to me. i was lowkey scared to talk about it at first but im so glad other ppl are seeing the vision!! can you give me your username i would love to follow you or just read your work hehe

[quantumripple]

Figured it might be neat to give post-mortems of fics I’ve written (in no particular order)

Gonna call this Quantum’s Post-Moretem Mondays even though I’m almost certain I’m never going to post this again on a Monday (work was just suuuuper slow)

So to start off we’ve got Pen Pals: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51609454

Premise: in early 2010 Taylor and Sveta become pen pals (hence the name).

Very much the definition of a rarepair since there’s only one other Taylor/Sveta fic that I’m aware of and it’s not even tagged.

And honestly hot take: the reason it’s a rarepair is that it lowkey just does not work as a ship. Taylor and Sveta are just not compatible, Taylor is far too… her. Sveta deserves better honestly.

What I like about the fic:

The bits of humour always blindside me when I do a reread. This one definitely leans on the sort of online humour you sometimes get with lesbians. Particularly the meme of two girls commiserating you each other that they “wish they could get a gf frfr”

I also just stole some funny bits from worm and adapted them but idk if I should count those bc they were just yoinked from worm.

I’m pretty proud of the background plot that’s happening in the fic. It’s pretty fun to explore those through only the lens of texts between two people. Things diverge a little bit and we end up with Echidna happening early, but the fight goes a lot differently. Ends up being a much longer fight/conflict but upside is case 53 stuff didn’t get leaked. Taylor eventually ended it by tag-teaming with a few heroes, getting the right power combo. S9 shows up after and a while after they’re there Amy takes Victoria. Taylor, thinking the s9 did it went on the warpath, she broke into the prt hq and stole the Bakuda bombs which she used to take out a few members before she found Amy and Victoria, made Amy fix her, then just fully executed her.

What I don’t like:

Taylor is extremely out of character. She’s too like… it’s hard to explain but she’s too cutesy, or dorky in a way that doesn’t really fit with how she is in canon. Triple especially anytime they’re discussing feelings. Honestly the only parts of her that feels in character is latter on in the fic when it starts getting into the broader hero plot stuff.

Sveta is also pretty ooc but not quite as bad as Taylor. She’s a hard character to write because while yea she’s got a lot going on at the end of the day she’s just a really nice person and that’s hard to write out unless you want something super fluffy.

And speaking of: the fic is just way too fluffy for my tastes these days. Like I had to skim the final scene where they’re being all sappy and confessional bc it made me feel ill lmao.

What I would do if I were to redo/re-explore:

Honestly this might be one of my few fics where I’d just cop it and say that it kinda doesn’t work conceptually. Taylor and Sveta just aren’t really compatible without changing one or the other.

Honestly if I were returning to it I’d probably drop Sveta (sorry) and actually just focus on the Brockton Bay plot stuff. So it’d be Taylor joining the wards, getting frustrated and then leaving and teaming up w Victoria and the focus is more in them becoming friends. And the other changes with Echidna and the s9 could be fun to explore.

Or alternatively I keep Sveta and lean into the doomed nature of the relationship, have it be a much more deep exploration of their characters and how they could interact. Follow Sveta as she makes an online friend but slowly realise that this friend of hers is weirdly violent as a cape. Have that introduce a lot more friction with Sveta judging Taylors methods more and more and Taylor just getting really defensive etc. and like…. It wouldn’t even need to have a bad ending per se. It would just be them realising that they’re really not compatible and that getting this invested in each other was a bad idea. Or the super good ending where Sveta comes around to Taylor’s way of thinking and they wage bloody war against evil, that could also be p fun. And not entirely impossible especially if Taylor is literally Svetas only friend.

Final thoughts:

This is one of those fics that still gets the odd random comment on ao3 which makes me remember it more often than other fics despite the fact that I don’t really have much to say/think about the fic beyond what I’ve already thrown up. It sits in my mind as a firm “basically ok, has its moments”

Curious to know what others think of it because honestly I barely do. I think I just picked it bc it was one of my shorter fics and sfw so I could read it between waiting for stuff to happen at work.

[comfymoth]

We need to permakill and retcon q!Wilbur.

and he was just a collective figment of everyone’s imagination……….. a hologram, like hatsune miku, but like. idk. made by the government or some shit.

sorry i went on a rant so i’m stowing it under the cut, but i’m really just incapable of shutting up about my opinions. the tl;dr is i don’t even hate him but he’s not present in canon! he’s not! so why is he such a massive deal!

and y’know what sucks is i actually do like him existing as this weird empty shape in tallulah and quackity’s lives for a while, i liked the way it let them idolize him and i liked when they had to realize their fantasy wasn’t real, i think that was fun and interesting. but that’s definitely not what i see in fan works!!! and those arcs are pretty much over, too, they’re only one part of those stories. q’s especially. so let them rest!!!

and honestly, i wouldn’t even mind the fanon fix-it fics if they weren’t completely inescapable. it’s just the over-saturation that’s killing me, like— wilbur has about as much character as spreen, or luzu, and i like fan content of those guys! i make fan content of those guys!! but nobody makes roier’s entire character and all his arcs about spreen the way they make quackity’s about wilbur. and i’ve talked about the infantilization of quackity by qtnt fans before. i’ve already gone on that rant. i probably wouldn’t even care this much if it weren’t for the ‘what if wilbur taught him how to read 🥺’ thing, that’s what turned me off in the first place!!!

but like. man. going back to the list there’s just no way quackity & wilbur should be outranking roier & jaiden in the platonic relationships category. that’s not even a little bit proportional, that makes no sense. and on a slightly biased note it’s weird that q has no big platonic tags with anyone else! i just wanna read a good quackity-centric fic about his other relationships, so if anyone has anything like that. please let me know. i’m struggling out here. (and i’m sorry but no quackity & phil doesn’t count because that always just circles back to being about wilbur)

[youhideastar]

Fit for Purpose Deleted Scenes II: Alternate Version, Second Half

Yesterday I posted the first batch of deleted scenes from Fit for Purpose: the first half of a backstory chapter that I ultimately deep-sixed as a distraction. For more explanation, please read that first-half post! Today I'm sharing the second half of that backstory chapter. Again, I'm going to try to keep my commentary on the scenes to a minimum so as not to make this post longer. Other deleted scenes posts are linked in the masterpost. I hope you enjoy!

We pick up during the Sunshot Campaign, with a scene that I've always found perplexing in canon - WWX promising to let LWJ help him with the demonic cultivation. It's not clear in canon whether he ever actually does that. Here, I decided he would.

On another rooftop in the moonlight, eyes dark and urgent, Lan Zhan says, “Wei Ying. You are trying to snatch grain from a roaring fire.”

Because without that grain, I’ll starve, thinks Wei Wuxian. For a moment, he imagines telling Lan Zhan about his core. It’s a wild thought, quickly smothered.

“Wei Ying. Let me help.”

Wei Wuxian knows what he should do: call him “Lan Wangji” again. Smile like a knife. Shove him away.

But the end of the war is coming, and Wei Wuxian knows he’s unlikely to survive it. A few months doesn’t seem like too long a time to pretend that he can be fixed—that what he’s missing is something Lan Zhan can give him.

He says yes. Lets Lan Zhan play pretty songs for him. Spiritually, they do nothing for him.

But the lie makes Lan Zhan feel better.

They’re at war. Lan Zhan could be hurt or killed at any time. Wei Wuxian doesn’t want the last thing he said to him to be cruel. That’s all.

*

In the end, they win. He wins.

The other sects make the omega Meng Yao—Jin Guangyao, now—the hero. What he did, they understand. One short, sharp thrust.

It makes A-Cheng and Lan Zhan angry on Wei Wuxian’s behalf; for his part, Wei Wuxian couldn’t care less. He did what he needed to do. He fulfilled his purpose. He didn’t do it for the glory.

They go back to Lotus Pier.

A-Cheng and Jiejie want everything to go back to the way it used to be. They treat him like Yunmeng Jiang’s head disciple.

So he tries to act like it.

But there’s a hole inside of him. And so, there are things he can’t do. Things he can’t give, because he gave them already, and there’s no getting them back.

He can’t teach sword cultivation—can’t even draw his sword. And no one wants to hear about his talismans; the ones he writes in blood. The ones that draw evil in, rather than repelling it. Any of a half-dozen others would be a better head disciple than he would.

There’s only one part of his job he can really do anymore. And even that is… harder than it used to be. They want to touch and be touched, but his skin still crawls with the touch of the dead. And he doesn’t want to put his mouth on them. He never wants human flesh in his mouth again.

He’d thought he’d be dead for this part.

He was supposed to be dead for this part.

Maybe he is.

A-Cheng lays into him for failing in his duty. For not giving enough. Wei Wuxian places his hand over his incision scar and keeps his silence. He knows it’s true. No matter how much he gives, it could never be enough.

That previous scene is probably the one that hurt the most to cut. I really liked it. But DAMN did it bring down the vibe of the fic. It's so bleak in tone that it really could not coexist with the cute banter in the Jingshi.

Next is my first crack at the Baifeng Mountain scene.

Come to Gusu with me, he says. Let me play for you, let me help you, he says. I am the one who knows you, he says. Better than you know yourself.

For a moment, he imagines it. Going to Gusu with Lan Zhan. Letting Lan Zhan take care of him, letting Lan Zhan imprison him—he can’t tell anymore what it is that Lan Zhan wants to do with him, but he’s not sure he cares. At least he’d be with Lan Zhan. At least Lan Zhan understands that he’s changed. At least Lan Zhan isn’t expecting him to pretend he’s still the laughing boy on the rooftop.

Ah, but it’s a selfish, selfish thought.

Yu-furen saw it in him all along.

For him to cling to Lan Zhan—brilliant, perfect, unparalleled Lan Zhan, who has never needed or wanted anything from Wei Wuxian, not even his body—is just another symptom of his weakness.

No. Wei Wuxian knows what he is. What he is meant for. He is meant to be of use. That is what he was made for. That is why he was saved from starvation on the streets – so he could be of use. To Jiang Cheng, and to Jiejie.

He ignores the voice murmuring in his head, But what use are you to them, really? Except as a mascot, and a whore.

But that didn't really address what I consider the main point of the Baifeng Mountain sequence in this AU, and an incredibly overlooked moment in canon, imo: Jin-furen's assertion that people are starting to believe that WWX and JYL are sexually involved. To me, this is THE turning point of this arc for WWX. The only way he'd ever leave Lotus Pier is if he thought it was better for JC and JYL if he did. I think by this point in canon, he's long ago decided JC would be better off with a different head disciple, but JYL is keeping him hanging on. He doesn't feel like he's failing her. Until this moment, when Jin-furen supplies him with a reason to believe that his presence is hurting JYL, too. At that point, he feels he has to leave. I think if he hadn't found Wen Qing in the street, he might have just wandered out of Lanling and noped out of the whole cultivation world at that point.

None of Yu-furen’s lectures or Jiang-shushu’s stories or A-Cheng’s threats taught him what to do when the very people he’s supposed to live for are better off without him.

He’s a useless head disciple to Yunmeng Jiang Sect. Everything he does makes A-Cheng angry. Whenever Jiejie sees him, she looks worried. Even Lan Zhan—according to Lan Xichen—is working himself to the bone in a futile quest to purify Wei Wuxian’s nonexistent core and bring him back to the sword path.

Then, on Baifeng Mountain, he learns that it’s so much worse than he thought.

“You shouldn’t be alone with him, A-Li,” Jin-furen says firmly.

Jiejie flinches. “A-Xian is my didi. There’s nothing improper—”

“With your mother gone, there is no one who will tell you what you need to hear,” Jin-furen interrupts. When she looks at Jiejie, her face is kind; the look she flicks at Wei Wuxian is like a knife. “But I will. A-Li, didi or no, people are talking. An unmarried omega who turned down an advantageous match to a powerful alpha to stay with her brother…”

“Yes,” Jiejie says, cheeks pale. “My brother, Jin-furen. Will you tell me to stay away from A-Cheng, too?”

Jin-furen waves her fan. “Of course not. That’s different. A-Li.” She barely bothers to drop her voice when she says, “You know what betas do. You know what they’re for.”

Wei Wuxian doesn’t know what Jiejie says to that. He doesn’t stay to find out. And he doesn’t plan to come back.

If he drinks himself to death, it’ll reflect poorly on Yunmeng Jiang. But if he flashes enough gold in the right parts of Lanling City, he thinks he can probably get himself knifed pretty easily, and bleed out fast enough that no one will wonder why his core didn’t save him.

Then A-Cheng can find a better head disciple, and Jiejie’s reputation will be safe.

And Lan Zhan—

Well. Lan Zhan will be fine. He won’t have to try to save Wei Wuxian anymore. Once the first shock is past, it’ll probably be a relief.

*

But in Lanling City, Wei Wuxian doesn’t find a knife in the dark.

He finds a woman in a red cloak, starving and bruised, searching for her beloved brother.

And some part of him that he thought was dead roars back to life, like a new-fed flame.

He remembers standing side-by-side with Lan Zhan, remembers the vows they made. He can’t be a good brother or a good beta. He can’t be head disciple, or cultivate the sword path.

But he can stand with justice. He can defend the weak. He can live with a clear conscience.

For the first time since his body was shattered against the death-soaked earth of the Burial Mounds, Wei Wuxian feels alive.

*

Lan Zhan doesn’t see it that way. Lan Zhan, sheltered under his pretty umbrella, tries to call Wei Wuxian back to the path of orthodoxy.

But Wei Wuxian has just walked away from a valley of corpses. He has seen what the path of orthodoxy is paved with. His hands are shaking. Behind him are those few he managed to save – cold, dirty, half-drowned, frightened, sick. He cannot walk away from them. He cannot believe Lan Zhan would ask him to.

PISSED-OFF AND INCREDULOUS. “We promised we would devote our lives to fighting the wicked and defending the weak!” he shouts, while the thunder rolls. His eyes sting as rain drips down his face. “You tell me, Lan Zhan: who is strong, and who is weak? Who is right, and who is wrong?”

Lan Zhan has no answer.

It rises in Wei Wuxian, then: the same smooth-polished calm that came upon him in the Xuanwu Cave, when he thought the moment had come for him to die for A-Cheng. A quiet but powerful peace.

Yes. He could die here. Now. Not knifed in an alley by some thief, trying to slip unnoticed from a world where he was no longer needed, but in battle against the mighty Hanguang-jun, defending the innocent. That would be worthy. That would be right.

As he raises Chenqing between them, Wei Wuxian can feel himself smiling. His belly churns with joy and sorrow, fear and anticipation.

“If there has to be a fight,” he says, very steady, “then let me fight to the death with you. If I have to die, then let it be at the hands of Hanguang-jun. It would be no injustice.”

But in the end, Lan Zhan steps away.

So Wei Wuxian rides forward. To Yiling, where Jiang-shushu rescued him all those years ago. To Yiling, where he dragged his body back from broken death.

He’s been reborn in Yiling twice. Maybe he can do it one more time. He can only try.

Here is an alternate version of WWX's decision to go with Wen Qing. I'm ultimately not sure which one I like better.

It would be monstrous of him to follow her. To turn his back on his family. His purpose.

You live for them. Die for them, if you have to. Don’t you dare keep anything for yourself that could go to them.

A perversion; a rebellion against nature, from which there could be no return and no redemption.

He thinks about the prisoners shuffled out in chains before the targets. Thinks about the screaming of the women, at Nightless City, as the blood ran from under the doors. Of the old men shot down from behind by golden arrows as they fled on the road, sobbing.

*

Three.

Two.

*

He swore, once, to live with a clean conscience.

He should never have made that vow—his conscience, like the rest of him, belonged to Yunmeng Jiang. It was not his to dispose of.

But he did. He did make that promise.

And even though it makes him ungrateful, and unfilial—even though he knows there will be no coming back from this—he finds he can’t break it.

This one thing, in the end, is his.

Either way, we pick up with this bit covering WWX's second stay in the Burial Mounds. Honestly, this is mostly me getting high on my own worldbuilding.

In the Burial Mounds, every moment reminds him of his time in hell. Resentful energy courses through his veins. His stomach growls with hunger. He wakes every morning with the knowledge that he has turned his back on the whole reason for his existence; that he is an ungrateful, unfilial disgrace.

And still, it is easier to breathe here than it was in Lotus Pier.

The things the Wen refugees need from him are things he can actually give: protection, and they don’t care that he uses methods other than the sword; labor, and for the first time since Wen Qing cut him open, he is not the weakest of the group; and money.

Most prostitutes are claimed omegas; safe enough, since a person can only be claimed once, but clients complain about the smell of a foreign claim, vinegary-sharp and off-putting.

A beta, then, can command a high price – even a skinny, dirty one, who can only ply his trade in alleys and teahouses, rather than silk-sheeted brothel beds.

Wei Wuxian doesn’t mind it. After all, it’s not like it’s so different.

This is what he was made for. People have always told him that. It’s just that, now, they give him money when they say it.

Then there's the "LWJ visits Yiling" section, which made it into the finished fic. We pick up with:

After Lan Zhan leaves, Wei Wuxian doesn’t expect to see anyone from his old life ever again, unless it’s at swordpoint.

But he’s always been loved too well – loved more than he deserves.

“Jiejie,” he whispers, eyes full of tears, as she stands before him resplendent in red.

“I wanted you to see me in my wedding clothes,” she says gently. “Do you like them?”

“You look magnificent,” he tells her, throat tight.

It’s almost more than he can bear, to sit around a table with Jiejie and A-Cheng eating pork rib and lotus root soup, being asked—at A-Cheng’s urging, how?—to give a courtesy name to Jiejie’s firstborn. He thought this was gone for good, and now, it’s—

It isn’t like he never left. It doesn’t feel that way. Wen Ning is waiting outside; the rest of the Wens up on the mountain; his stomach is growling despite the soup, because it’s all he’s eaten all day; black curls of resentful energy fill the ugly hole where his core used to be.

But it feels like, maybe, he could find a new way of belonging. Like, maybe, he could have both: be true to his family and his sect and be true to the vow he made with Lan Zhan.

*

He’s so stupid. He never learns.

And every time he falls into the delusion, people die.

*

But when he gets Lan Zhan’s invitation to Jin Rulan’s 100-days celebration, it seems like a sign from the heavens. Confirmation. He can have both, and the proof is right here, in his nephew’s name written in Lan Zhan’s perfect calligraphy.

He works in a frenzy on his gift for the baby. Night and day, applying new protections, refining those that are already there. Every mo, yao, gui and guai he can think of will be repelled. Curses, too – every curse he ever learned about, and some he invented himself.

This is how he’ll make up for it – how he’ll pay the Jiangs back for what he owes them. Every disappointment, every time he wasn’t there for Jiang Cheng or Jiejie when they needed him, will be made right. He pours his time, his ingenuity, his expertise, and his literal blood into these beads.

They’re not fine jade or lustrous gold. Probably a kid raised as the heir to Lanling Jin won’t want to wear it. But Jiejie can make him, when he’s little. And when he’s older, he can carry it with him in a bag or in his sleeve – that will be enough. Wei Wuxian takes care to make the protections strong enough for that. He doesn’t want to overlook anything. It has to be perfect. This is his chance.

You do anything your jie needs, Yu-furen’s voice echoes, every time Wei Wuxian’s eyes start to close under the weight of his exhaustion. And her children, someday.

I will, Yu-furen, he promises silently, rubbing his eyes and returning to his work. I swear it. I will.

*

And then, there is the ambush.

The box falls from his sleeve.

Jin Zixun closes his hand and—

Wei Wuxian doesn’t completely remember what happens after that.

The dust that used to be lotus-seed beads, pouring from Jin Zixun’s fist like sand through an hourglass – he remembers that very well. It replays in his mind, again and again.

But afterward. That’s when he loses the thread. Loses control.

Loses—

*

Jin Zixuan.

Wen Qing and Wen Ning.

A-Yuan.

Wen-popo. Fourth Uncle. All of the Wens he fought so hard and gave so much to save.

Lan Zhan – his enemy now.

Jiejie, widowed and grieving. Jiejie, wounded. Then—

*

“Jiejie!”

*

There’s no point, after that.

Lan Zhan takes his hand, holds on, won’t let go when Wei Wuxian tells him to. He looks at Wei Wuxian like he sees something worth saving.

But then A-Cheng is there; Wei Wuxian smiles. Good. This is how it should be. His life is A-Cheng’s to take. It always has been.

Everything happens very quickly, then.

And then there’s nothing at all.

Okay, that's all very depressing... future deleted scenes posts won't be so bleak, I promise! Stay tuned for tomorrow's installment.

[reinvent-and-believe]

not true if you’re still taking trick or treat requests, but i love your fics too much not to try!!

royjamie, 71!

hello! have some violent pre-canon sexual tension 😅

71. adrenaline

--

Here it is.

Roy’s got him cornered, back against the wall after a particularly vile insult about Richmond, because Jamie Tartt is above being a fucking team player. They’re close, they always end up so fucking close when it’s like this, and maybe this is it, maybe now they finally duke it out proper-like. Jamie looks like he can’t wait, practically shaking with adrenaline, anticipation.

For all his barely suppressed rage and borderline violent tendencies, Roy’s never been much of a brawler. An aggressive headbutt here or there, sure, that’s practically part of the game. But he doesn’t go around getting into fistfights; he’s got plenty of vices, but that’s not one. He’s Richmond’s captain, for fuck’s sake, he’s not going to be the one to throw the first punch at one of his players, matter how much that shit deserves it. If Jamie starts it, though…

Even with the constant threat of violence bubbling between them, it’s surreal to imagine the physical reality of it, how it will feel when Jamie finally takes that swing. How Roy’s fist might feel colliding with the meat of Jamie’s impressive jaw, how Jamie’s fist might feel in his stomach. Jamie’s not particularly sportsmanlike, that’s for fucking sure, Roy’s seen it over and over since the brat’s loan started three months ago. He imagines Jamie looking for every weakness, slapping, scratching, pulling his hair as they grapple together, breathing the same air.

Jamie grabs him by the collar and here it is, this is where they’ve been headed since that arrogant, childish cunt showed up at Nelson Road with his inflated ego and easy sneer. Roy braces himself for the blow, relieved that it’s Jamie who’ll finally start this, Jamie who’ll give into the violence so Roy need only respond.

Jamie crashes into him, kissing him hard, his fist balled in Roy’s shirt.

Roy freezes against him for a split second before he’s pressing Jamie back harder against the wall, crowding him, close, unbearably close, like he wants to fucking devour him. Rage and arousal and relief flood through him. Jamie struck first, Roy tells himself as he brings a rough hand to the back of Jamie’s neck, pulling him closer, kissing him harder. Roy’s just responding.

Jamie shoves him back, pushing away from the wall and fixing Roy with a heated, filthy smirk. “You got off easy this time, granddad,” he says, winking at Roy and blowing him a kiss as he saunters past him to his car.

Roy leans back against the wall and watches him leave.

Fuck.

[canonicallyobserving911]

“I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Fanonwriter2023 on AO3

Where CANON and FANON collide!

Season 7 FANON Speculation: Buddie Multi-Chapter Fanfic - Hiatus Reading: “I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Chapter 27 is now available on AO3.

This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

“I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Currently 27 chapters completed: 1.097M Words; Rated: Mature

One chapter will be posted at a time.

___________

Here's a snippet from Chapter 27 of emotionally distraught Buck and Eddie after Buck prepares to admit he's ready to face his death after having avoided it for 10 months.

___________

“EDDIE!” He screams then he hiccups on a sob but he does his best to keep talking so he can explain. “I—I don’t know how to pro—cess it. I got struck by light—ning and—and uh… I—I DIED!”

While looking at his husband, his eyes begin to rapidly move around like he’s searching for an answer and once realization sets in, he continues. “Then you… you had to…” He trails off again as his eyes widen even more and the look in them changes to something that resembles sheer horror and fear. His mouth falls open and all the words he wants to say come to a screeching halt inside of his mind.

Immediately, silence fills their bedroom, it’s deafening and the mood gets heavier but Eddie remains directly in his husband’s line of sight, so he’ll know he’s right in front of him.

Their eyes are locked on each other’s and after a few seconds pass, Buck breaks the sound barrier and yells, “OH MY GOD!”

Eddie can tell all the pieces to the puzzle from the night Buck died are falling into place but since Buck was dead, everything he knows about those three minutes and seventeen seconds was told to him by someone else including Eddie. Imagining how terrifying it must be for him sends a shockwave through his body and he fully understands how upsetting this is especially since he remembers all the feelings he experienced every time he remembered being shot. But there’s a difference since he was in and out of consciousness and he remembers bits and pieces of the things that happened and the blanks were filled in by Buck. Instead of remembering some of it, Buck’s only been told by other people what happened to him and having all those thoughts bombard his frontal lobe at the same time has to be overwhelming.

All he wants to do is take the pain away and with all his attention focused on his husband, he calmly says, “I love you and it’s ok because I’m right here with you. Always and forever, remember?”

Buck lowers his eyes like he does whenever he feels like he should have been able to fix it but Eddie’s not going to let him blame himself for something that’s not his fault. He softly suggests, “Amore mio, guardami”. [“My love, look at me”.]

He slowly raises his eyes and when they meet his husband’s, he shatters and falls forward but Eddie catches him just like he did yesterday. He’s crying so hard he’s hyperventilating and Eddie’s trying to calm him because he doesn’t want him to become unresponsive and fall into a state of unconsciousness again.

___________

This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

Fic Summary: Months after Buck and Eddie were hit by the same lightning strike; they’re still struggling with the aftermath of it.  But before they make their love confessions, they’ll spend time getting to know themselves as individuals first. Eddie learns to enjoy the simple things in life as he participates in activities on his own and with new friends while Buck learns the rest of the 31-year-old deep dark family secret about his conception and birth. Their journey to forever is still a work in progress but once they finally admit they’re in love with each other, everything that follows their love confessions will be cataclysmic.

__________

Chapter Summaries

Chapter 1 - Eddie makes a new friend while Buck receives devastating news regarding the sperm donation he made for Connor and Kameron.

Chapter 2 - Buck does a lot of research to learn more about the abnormalities found in his red blood cells and Eddie starts a new therapy journey that’s all about him and not the traumas he’s experienced.

Chapter 3 - After more than a month, Buck and Eddie finally spend time together outside of work but it doesn’t end well and they part with a lot of uncertainty regarding their places in each other’s lives.

Chapter 4 - Eddie has a few realizations about his life which causes him to consider moving back to El Paso, TX while Buck continues to be reminded of his past which causes him to take an impromptu road trip across America.

Chapter 5 - Both Buck and Eddie have difficult conversations with their parents and Buck finally learns the truth behind the reason why his mother despised him while Eddie finally tells his mother about the way she tries to control him.

Chapter 6 - More than two weeks after Buck pushed Eddie away after suggesting they needed a break; Eddie decides to try again. Eddie’s there for Buck when he’s at his worst just like Buck was there for him when he was at his worst and he won’t let Buck give up.

Chapter 7 - After Buck’s mental breakdown, Eddie has his back the same way Buck had his when he had his own breakdown more than a year ago.  They share several vulnerable and emotionally intimate moments with one another and they begin to realize their small, sweet and caring gestures matter just as much if not more than any grand gesture ever could because these are the foundations of a long-lasting love relationship.

Chapter 8 - Buck, Eddie and Chris all have their own therapists and during their sessions, they reflect on their pasts while they’re in the present so they can prepare for their future together as a family.

Chapter 9 - Buck and Eddie are there for each other when Buck has to testify as a witness during the trial.  But by the end of it, they’ll both realize their individual and shared traumas are going to keep resurfacing until they talk about them, deal with the fact that they’re in love with one another and face the fact that they can’t live without each other.

Chapter 10 - As Buck and Eddie finally begin to confront their past traumas, they realize how much they need each other to fill in the gaps of their memories.  Additionally, the universe screams at them for what appears to be the one hundredth time so Buck can realize he doesn’t have to ‘find it’ because he already ‘made it’ and Eddie’s reminded tomorrow isn’t promised and he doesn’t have to die alone if he doesn’t want to.

Chapter 11 - A “virga” or dry thunderstorm is in the forecast but once the rain starts, the thunderstorm happening outside won’t be able to match the storm brewing inside between Buck and Eddie.  It’s the universe’s final scream and when the tumultuous winds begin to blow, they’ll have one last chance to hold onto everything they’ve built over the last six years or they’ll lose it all forever.

Chapter 12 - Buck and Eddie have always shared a deep physical attraction and an emotional intimacy that’s unmatched but now that they’re in a relationship, they’re learning how to navigate the romantic intimacy they’ve been waiting for six years to explore. The love they have for each other is a once in a lifetime, soulmate, love of their lives type of love that transcends space and time.

Chapter 13 - While navigating the newness of their romantic relationship, Buck and Eddie take advantage of every moment they spend together. As their individual lives, people from their pasts, time constraints and the possibility of losing each other again make attempts to interrupt and interfere with their journey to forever, they love, care for, support and hold onto each other even tighter to withstand it all.

Chapter 14 - Buck and Eddie can see the lights at the end of the tunnels regarding the results of Buck’s Cancer Screening along with everything else they’re dealing with. But are the lights they see exits to the tunnels or are they headlights on different runaway trains that are speeding towards them in an effort to interrupt their forever?

Chapter 15 - Buck and Eddie have known they were exactly who the other one wanted in a partner since they met six years ago when they agreed to have each other’s backs. They’re in a romantic relationship, they’re both preparing to ask the other one to spend forever with them and by the end of the seventh week into their relationship, together they will plan their most important and greatest adventure for their future.

Chapter 16 - As Buck and Eddie begin to prepare for their marriage ceremony that will take place in Rome, Italy in December 2023, they start planning their first international adventure as a romantic couple. Even though Chris is still the only person they’ve told about their relationship, several people who know them have already witnessed the love they share and as the days continue, others will witness it too.

Chapter 17 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to departing Los Angeles for their international adventure, a moment in time will remind them; life is fragile, tomorrow isn’t promised and every second of everyday should be cherished because everything can change in an instant. The result of that realization will cause them to hold onto each other even more.

Chapter 18 - As Buck, Eddie and Chris prepare for family gatherings before and during the Thanksgiving holiday, the “Santa Ana Winds” start to blow and all sorts of expected and unexpected familial drama ensues.

Chapter 19 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to their wedding day, the universe begins to align everything so that some of their parent and children's relationships are strengthened while others come to an abrupt end.

Chapter 20 - With only 14 days remaining until Buck, Eddie and Chris depart Los Angeles, CA traveling to Rome, Italy, for their first family adventure, an early morning conversation about “tying up loose ends” helps Buck and Eddie realize there are still several things left unfinished on their ‘To Do’ lists. The question is will there be enough time to complete all of them?

Chapter 21 - Buck, Eddie and Chris are finalizing their ‘To Do’ Lists, double checking their itineraries and packing their suitcases in preparation for their trip to Europe so they can board their flight that departs Los Angeles, CA on Friday, December 15, 2023 at 3:25PM.

Chapter 22 - While Buck, Eddie and Chris spend the first 8 days of their European family adventure in Italy, their primary reason for going will be fulfilled as well as several others they hadn’t considered or anticipated.

Chapter 23 - As the Diaz Family continues their Italian family adventure, they’ll say, “Ciao” or hello and goodbye to a lot of things almost immediately after they become an official and legal family.

Chapter 24 - After Buck, Eddie and Chris arrive in London, England on December 24th; the Diazes immediately start preparing to spend their first family Christmas together. During their stay, each of them will hear a few choice words that will be the life raft to get them home to complete their searches to be seen and to be found.

Chapter 25 - After spending more than two weeks in Europe, Eddie, Buck and Chris are back in Los Angeles and they’re getting ready to attend Maddie and Chimney’s New Year’s Eve party. During the event, they have plans to make two surprise announcements but the question is, who’s really going to be surprised, the Diaz family or their found family at the 118?

Chapter 26 - Buck and Eddie are once again faced with their greatest fear of losing each other but this time it could be permanent and if it is, then they won’t be able to spend the rest of their lives together.

Chapter 27 - After Buck resumes therapy, he’ll continue to face the fact that he “DIED” in March 2023 and during those sessions, he’ll learn about the 7 stages of grief. As he continues his healing journey, Eddie will be right by his side just like he promised and the Diaz family will start to deal with their three minutes and seventeen seconds loss as a family.

Chapter 28 - Will be posted soon.

__________

Read chapters 1-27 are available on AO3.

Continue reading on AO3

[satashiiwrites]

wip wednesday, part 2

and a second time, just for fun and because I haven’t in a while. Catching up on a day off 🙃

Graphics by me.

Title: Welcome to the Jungle

Fandom: 911

Pairings: Buddie, Robert Nash Jr/Daniel Buckley, assume other canon pairings will make an eventual appearance.

Fic Summary:  From the concrete jungle to the actual jungle, five players will be summoned to Jumanji to save it from the wicked Van Pelt.

Rating: Explicit (sex, stereotyped villain) 

Tags/warnings: explicit sex, canon-typical violence, Jumanji AU, time travel fix it, slow burn, long fic, pod fic welcome, deviating from canon where it suits the story, canon timeline is a mess and we’re just not going to stress about it, author doesn’t do straight up adaptations, eventual happy ending, mention of divorce and canon character deaths, aged up Robbie and Brook, mentions of child neglect/abuse from the Buckley parents

Tagging @dannyreader8 @shipperqueen6 @tiny-reader @killerpeguin @victory-in-my-veins @idealuk @aida-sparks @piratepyxis @lesbianswiftie137 @buddiesmutslut @haderaide @zimes89 @rosieposiepuddingpie @lilylovesthings @spoodle-monkey @rasquirrell @blue-winged-boy . If you’d like to be tagged/or removed from posts related to this fic, interact with this post.

December 2009, St. Paul, Minnesota

It’s a week after Thanksgiving and St. Paul is starting to enter the deep freeze of winter.  It’s not fully taken hold yet, afternoons still are warm enough that the snow flurries aren’t sticking around and the four inches of snow they had the day after Thanksgiving has melted away like a premonition of the deeper snows to come. 

School’s out for the day and Robbie is walking home with Brooke, neither of them in a hurry to get to their destination.  Home has been tense as of late. Mom and Dad are fighting more and more but trying to keep it away from Robbie’s ears but he’s old enough now that he picks up more.  Brooke, despite being three years younger, also knows. 

They all know that Dad’s off the wagon again. 

Rehab didn’t stick. 

Robbie’s not sure what will make his Dad stay sober. He’d thought that Dad had been doing well until Uncle Charlie had visited for Thanksgiving and then it’d all gone to hell. There’d been yelling and Mom telling Uncle Charlie to leave which had almost led to a fist fight over the turkey.  Robbie had been ready to back up his Dad but instead, Dad had put on his coat and shoes and taken Uncle Charlie down to the corner pub which was open even on holidays. 

Dad had smelled like a liquor store when he’d stumbled home after midnight. 

He’s smelled of it on his days off ever since. 

Mom’s tongue has been sharper than a knife and demanded that they come straight home from school so they don’t get into trouble, which means that Robbie’s had to drop out of basketball and Brooke out of cheerleading.  

Robbie misses his friends.  All of his friends are on the basketball team and don’t understand why he can’t stay after school anymore.  It’s not like he’s a little kid and needs a babysitter anymore and Brooke was taking classes to be a babysitter, so she doesn’t need one either. 

Instead, they’re both reluctantly headed home two hours earlier than they used to, backpacks heavy with homework. 

Walking home—because Mom wouldn’t let him use his learner’s permit to take him and Brooke to and from school like he had been. There was no reason for Mom to drive to the school to let him then drive home if they could just walk. 

Robbie’s pretty sure he’s not going to get his full license when he turns sixteen—that he’ll have to wait until Mom’s okay with it.  Not with how Mom’s been restricting like she did the last time Dad got this bad.  When Dad gets like this, Mom needs control.  When Robbie was younger it’d been annoying and scary, now it’s frustrating and he’s getting mad.  Last night, Mom had taken away the GameBoy he’d gotten for his birthday telling him he needed to focus on school, not games. 

He doesn’t like being mad at his parents and he kicks a piece of paper that is crumped up on the sidewalk. 

“Robbie!” Brooke scolds, picking up the dirty paper and holding it up between pinched fingers.  The face she’s making at him is full of disappointment. “There’s a trash can right over there,” she points, holding the paper out for him to take. 

The trash can is next to an alley and is over full.  Trash pickup got delayed last week because of the holiday and people have been stashing bags wherever they can, a broken bag likely the source of the litter Brooke is holding. Rolling his eyes and with a heavy sigh, Robbie takes the gross paper and stuffs it between two bags.  “There? Happy?”

Brooke frowns, cocking her head which makes her blonde pony tail sway.  “Do you hear that?”

“Hear what?” Robbie asks even as he feels the low thrum of a drumbeat in his bones, making him want to shiver. 

“The drums?  Do you hear them?”

“I do.  Where is it coming from?”

“It’s coming from the alley,” Brooke whispers, eyes wide as she stares down the narrow alley between apartment buildings.  They’re only two blocks from home . 

Robbie, suddenly feeling contrary, decides to investigate. So what if they’re five minutes late getting home?  Mom can deal with it. 

“Robbie!” Brooke hisses, trying to catch his coat as he slides past the mountain of trash.  “What are you doing?!?”

“Seeing what’s making the noise,” he tosses over his shoulder as he moves deeper into the alley.  It’s dark in here, the late afternoon sun rapidly fading this far north and the angle of sunlight is blocked by the tall buildings on either side.  Soon, they’ll be walking home from school in the twilight, Robbie thinks as he twists around a broken fire escape ladder that is stuck in the down position.

He should tell his dad about the broken ladder.  This building is connected to theirs and Dad likes to make sure exits are always clear for evacuations. 

The drumbeats grow stronger, seeming to echo from everywhere as it bounces off the brick walls until he stumbles across a trash bag that spills open at his feet, dropping something heavy on his left foot. 

The drumbeats cease and the only noise is the distant sound of traffic that is ubiquitous anywhere in St. Paul. 

“Ouch,” Robbie grumbles as he crouches to see what fell on his foot. 

“Robbie?” Brooke calls, having followed him into the alley.  

“I’ll be right there, Brooke,” he says as he uncovers an old GameBoy.