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itsmarsss · 6 months ago

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Scandalous (Blitzø x Fem!Succubus!Reader x Stolas) [Helluva Boss] pt. 4 - Immediate Murder Professionals

How the mighty do fall. (Getting into a weird three-way situation with an imp and a succubus isn't exactly considered classy, Stolas)

Blitzø just might be stupid.

pt. 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3 | pt. 4 | pt. 5 | 1st bonus | pt. 6 | pt. 7 | pt. 8 | pt. 9 | 2nd bonus

Word Count: 2,340

Warnings: eh, mentions of sex only i think. also stolas is newly separated so he's trying this new thing called flirting. yes i'm a firm believer that stolas is naturally so weirdly flirty he could make a succubus flustered no questions asked.

“...and then I yelled ‘sorry I fucked your husband’ and just kinda… left.”

Everyone was gathered around the big table in the meeting room at I.M.P., per Blitzø’s request. Well, he didn’t request it, per se- it was something more along the lines of yelling “Anyone who’s not a whiny bitch follow me, I got something to show you” and everyone just sort of complying.

He had been on and on in excruciating detail about how he’d up and stolen whatever it was he wanted to show you. He had yet to show you a thing.

“Oh wow. You are an idiot,” you state.

“And why is that, witch bitch?”

“You stole from a Goetia prince?”

“Yeah I did. And I looked sexy doing it.”

“What did you even wanna steal so bad?” Millie asks.

“Oh-ho-ho. You’re not even fuckin’ ready. None of you are even fucking ready.” He slams a big, heavy book on the desk. You inspect it, trying to figure out why he would go out of his way, in a borderline suicidal quest, to steal a book. Your eyes widen when you realize you know exactly what it is.

“You stole from STOLAS?” He had to be fucking- wait. “Wait, you fucked Stolas?”

“What how’d you know it was him?”

“It’s- it’s his Grimoire. That’s what this is isn’t it?”

“Yup. And with this,” he explains to the others, since apparently you already knew of it, “we’ll be able to go up to the living world and kill any human we’re paid to kill.”

“That- that’s- Blitzø this is insane. And I don’t mean good insane. I mean batshit crazy insane.”

“How do you even know what this is?”

“I- I used to see him a lot. You know. Ozzie stuff. They’re always in meetings. I didn’t- I’m really having trouble believing he acted like that-”

“What, like a needy bitch in heat?” Blitzø cuts you off.

You feel yourself get flustered at the implication, not managing to finish whatever you had been about to say.

“Oh my fucking Satan, Blitz,” Loona lets out a groan, frustrated at what she was hearing, which is fair. It’s enough to prompt her to leave the room entirely, assumingly to her seat at the front desk.

“Sir, you need to give this back.” Moxxie pushes the book across the table back to him.

“What? After everything I had to go through to get it? No way!”

“No, Mox is right. Stolas is nice, but he’s still, like, one of the most powerful demons down here, dude. And this is- this is next level doing him wrong. You didn’t just steal from him, you played with his feelings too. That’s so much worse.”

“Feelings? Come on! So we’re all ganging up on Blitzo now, are we?” You all cringed a bit whenever he used his own given name. It felt weird and just totally… wrong, considering how adamant he always was about correcting everyone else when it came to it, but, to be fair, he didn’t really seem to notice when he did it. He just happened to absentmindedly call himself that sometimes when he was feeling criticized, which… well, you weren’t sure if you wanted to unpack whatever that meant. He keeps on. “I’m sorry I worry about us having jobs and money to pay rent and food to feed ourselves!”

“Blitz that’s not-” Millie starts, but gets cut off by Loona, who walks back into the room. “Guys, there’s an… owl… guy… thing… looking for Blitz out there.”

Oh, shit.

“We’re gonna die,” Moxxie mutters under his breath, starting to chant it over and over again, eyes almost popping out of his head. Millie puts her arms around his shoulders and brings his head to her lap to try and calm him down, sending a death glare- much like yourself- towards Blitzø, who now looked like a deer in headlights, caught red-handed, apparently not expecting to be found that soon.

“Uuuhhh, tell him I’m not here!”

“Already did, he said some weird shit about being able to smell you or whatever the fuck that was about. That guy’s a fucking freak.” Huh. Maybe Blitzø wasn’t lying.

“Uhhh fuck fuck fuck fuck, gotta think, gotta think,” Blitzø begins pacing in circles around the room.

“Well? What the fuck did you expect?”

“I didn’t think that far ahead, alright? Sue me.”

“Oh really? I could have sworn you had everything figured out!”

His head shoots up and he points at you, completely ignoring your sarcasm. “You go talk to him!”

“Me? This is your problem!”

“Our problem! You work here don’t you?”

“Blitz I swear to Satan.”

“Pleeeaaaase?” He tries making puppy eyes at you. It’s kind of bizarre, but not entirely useless. “You said you know him, he’ll probably be nicer to you. Maybe you can soften the blow. Ha. Blow.”

“If it doesn’t work I’m ratting you out and I’m not gonna feel bad about it.”

“Thank you thank you thank you, I’ll owe you one, now go!”

You let out a groan, making sure he hears it. You could not believe you were about to do this. Sure, let’s confront pissed-off demon royalty about something of theirs that you definitely have in your possession just in the next room. Nothing could possibly go wrong with that. “Can you tell him to go to your dad’s office, Loons?”

“Yeah whatever.”

You make your way out of the meeting room and into Blitzø’s office, which is… a sight to behold. There were horse drawings scattered everywhere around the room, figurines of Millie, Moxxie, and yourself on top of his desk (you didn’t even want to know), guns you knew definitely didn’t have their safety locks on just laying on various different surfaces. Yeah, it was all very on-brand.

You sit down on his chair, getting barely a few seconds to prepare yourself for your talk with Stolas before he walks into the room.

Well, no, he doesn’t exactly walk in. He leans against the door frame, pulling a leg up and running a hand up it as he starts speaking, yet to take a look into the room. “For someone so remarkably sexy you are so hard to find, Bli- oh my!” He’s visibly startled when he finally makew eye contact with you, evidently having expected Blitzø to be the one in your place. Almost tripping over himself, he tries to pull himself together, fixing his posture and wiping non-existent dust off of his clothes as if to pretend he hadn’t just made a fool of himself. Stolas had always kept his composure around you whenever he went over to meet with Ozzie, so this behavior… it was definitely new.

He clears his throat. “I’m sorry. I thought you were-”

You decide to save him the embarrassment. Or, well, further embarrassment. “Your Highness! Hi.”

“Y/n.” He remembers your name. What, of course he remembers your name, dumbass! That’s completely normal. “You… Do you not work for Asmodeus anymore?”

“Not really. I’d been working there a long time. Wanted to try something new.”

“So you chose to work… here?” He motions around, and you couldn’t blame him. It didn’t look like the best place in Hell. And you supposed it did seem like an odd change in occupation.

“We’re a work in progress.”

“Well, do you and Asmodeus still keep in touch? I recall you were quite good friends.”

“Yes! We still are. We still are. How have you been, uh, doing, your highness?” You ask, carefully.

“Please, there is still no need to call me that.” Your interactions always went like this- you called him by his title, he insisted you call him by his name, and you always refused to. Strangely enough, you called him by his name when referring to him in conversation with Ozzie.

But you don’t feel the need for all of that now. “Right, I’m sorry. Stolas.”

“Well, I haven’t been doing quite so great, actually. I’m sure you’re aware why.”

You shut your eyes, taking a deep breath before opening them up again and forcing yourself to make eye contact with him, trying to stay collected. Play it cool. “I… might have an idea, yes.”

“You see, you have worked with Asmodeus for a long time. You’ve been around myself plenty, haven’t you, darling?”

Had he ever called you darling before? You’re positive he’s never, ever done that.

Chill, dumbass! It’s just a fancy people thing. No big deal. “Yes.”

“Yes, so you know how crucial my Grimoire is for my purpose in the Ars Goetia, don’t you?” He speaks to you in an almost condescending manner. You almost feel insulted. Did his voice always sound like that?

“Yes.”

“Perfect. So I suppose you understand why I would be very upset when I came to find out your friend, Blitzy, stole such a sacred artifact from me.”

“I understand.”

“My Grimoire contains spells that are meant for mine and, in the future, my daughter’s use only, and it would simply be a scandal if it fell into the hands of itty bitty imps such as yourselves.” Okay, he was definitely being condescending now. Why was it kind of hot? It was definitely hot.

What the fuck.

“Uhhhhh-”

“It makes things so much worse that he simply hurt my feelings! After a night of such passionate fornication, you could only imagine my surprise when I came to find out the book had been missing! Had I not known better I would have sworn it had been deceiving work of someone like yourself.”

“Like myself?”

“You are a succubus, aren’t you, dear?” He tilts his head to the side as if what he meant had been obvious. And it probably had- you’d just read too much into it. Was what Blitzø had told you about what happened getting to your head or something?

“Ooookay. Uh. I’m really- I’m really sorry about… all of that. Uh. Wow. Uh that really is a lot huh? I’m just gonna… I’m just gonna go call Blitz now and you guys can talk it out maybe. That fine for you? Fantastic. Good talk, Stolas!”

You slip past him and out of the office, catching your breath before going back into the meeting room to call Blitzø and let him handle the situation. What the actual fuck was that?

[. . .]

“So?” Millie questions Blitzø as he enters the meeting room again after a good half hour. Everyone follows, looking at him expectantly.

He pauses, for dramatic effect. “Guess who just founded the first human-killing business in Hell?”

“What?” You ask, incredulous.

“I’m sorry sir are you saying the Prince is letting us use his spell book?”

“You heard it, Mox.”

“H-how?”

“Well I’m gonna have to dick him down every full moon but I guess that’s a good trade.”

The room goes silent.

Moxie breaks the silence first. “Uhh, what?”

“What?”

“What’s that about the full moon?”

“Oh well. Well, apparently I’m a fantastic fucking lay, just unforgettable. So all I gotta do to have the book is give it back to him every full moon and then fuck him into oblivion and we’re good to go.”

“And you’re sure you’re fine with that?” You ask him, carefully.

“Well yeah? It’s fucking great! We get the book AND I get to fuck a Prince into submission every once in a while? Couldn’t be better.”

You’re not that sure about it, but what was the point in arguing with him? You shrug. “If you say so.”

“And he’s just… fine with that?” Moxxie questions, not buying it.

“What, you think I’d lie?”

“Yeah,” everyone replies, without hesitation.

“Well I’m not!”

“Well shit. Your dick must be good.” Well, that wasn’t supposed to come out.

He grins. “Ya wanna find out?”

You stare at him, unamused, for a second, locking eyes with Moxxie soon after.

“You deserved that,” Moxxie points out.

“Yeah I regretted it as soon I said it.”

“You really should have seen it coming,” Blitzø himself adds.He grabs the Grimoire, bringing everyone’s attention to it. “So. Aren’t y’all curious? I know I wanna know what the human realm is like.”

“It’s really not that different from here,” you tell him.

“Oh yeah, I forget you’ve been there before. What do you guys even do there?”

“Uuuhhh.”

“They fuck people to death, Mills, ain’t that cool?”

“Oh shut up you know that hardly ever happens anymore.”

“But’cha could.”

You sigh, knowing he just wanted to hear that he was right. You give him a little smile. “But I could.”

“Hell yeah!” It was always weirdly nice that he thought that part of what you were was cool rather than being disgusted by it. “Should we go take a look?”

“How’d ya even work this thing?” Millie asks, examining the book in Blitzø’s hands.

“Fuck if I know.”

“You didn’t ask him?” Loona asks.

“Not really.”

“I’m not even-” she rolls her eyes. “Gimme that” Snatching the book from him and going through the pages for a bit, she stops in a particular one, attempting a few times to read some words from it. Fair enough, a portal leading… somewhere… appears. You’d have to put a pin on that for later and ask her how she knew what to do, but right now everyone was too excited.

“Let’s go fuck some humans to death!” Blitzø exclaims.

“No.” You say sternly.

“Let’s go fuck some humans?” He tries again.

“Sir! No!” Moxxie yells, disgusted.

“Let’s go kill some humans!”

“Hell yeah!” Millie finally agrees,

“Yeah! Wait why am I even listening to you guys, I’m the boss here!”

“Sure thing Blitz.” You assure him, getting your foot through the portal. “You coming?”

Blitzø turns around. “Looney? You’re not killing anyone there. Got it? It’s too dangerous.”

“But that’s no fun!”

“Looney.”

“Fine.”

“Let’s go kill some humans then!” He shoves you into the portal, jumping through right after you. Jackass.

A/N: i did a lot of things different than i said id do lmao and i toned down the flirting from stolas to leave it for a different chapter hope this is fun it aint gonna be fun for v long luv yall

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feidude · 5 days ago

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the system gives SQQ a new plotline to complete by the name of “shen qingqiu’s shidi seduction storyline” and SQQ is frazzled, as he sees the title and is like ??? excuse me?! how can i do this to my loyal, respectable and ever so straight shidi!!! but system shows the first task and he’s like ah? it’s just tying my hair up?? what kind of seduction is this..? …and it’s worth 25 B-points u say?? hmm not bad, not bad at all!! ….well…ok! sure 👀👀

and so it begins. before the next scheduled meridian cleansing, SQQ ties his hair in a high ponytail and it’s honestly kinda nice bc the weather was becoming awfully warm and all. anyway there’s a resounding knock on the door and SQQ composes himself before opening the door and saying w/ a smile gracing his lips, “Liu-shidi!! this shixiong has been waiting for you!!” and……silence. Liu-shidi looks stunned, eyes quickly glancing at his neck (hm?) before he turns his head, pointedly not looking at SQQ. There’s an uncharacteristic flush on his cheeks but he’s frowning, and with gritted teeth, says: “You--!…I’ll come back later!”

And in the matter of seconds, he’s gone, and SQQ is just like…..🧍eh. SQQ touches his hair and feels a bit sad,,cuz surely this new look of his isn’t too bad, no? but the system screen shines: +25 B-points!! Host successfully completed first task! Keep it up kya~~!

(ヾ;￣▽￣)ヾ!! ~~

SQQ:…...

he’s confused now bc didn’t his shidi just run away from him?? how did he get the points?? system ah, pls explain the reasoning behind these seduction points! but system is a little shit and doesn’t answer so SQQ curses it until he’s tired and decides whatever, he’s got the points so 🤷

anyways the next task is: caress the arm,,,,which !! hello?? SQQ does not want to end up with a broken hand, thank you very much !! but this one is worth 30 B-Points after all… so maybe if he does it fast enough???

he takes his chance after leaving the weekly Sect meeting, catching up to walk alongside LQG, calling out to him softly: “Shidi~.”

LQG grunts and turns to look at him, eyebrows raised in question. SQQ smiles: “Will shidi indulge this shixiong and recount his encounter with the Blue-Tailed Dragonsprout?”

LQG hums and is quiet for a few seconds, before slowly retelling his fight with the dangerous beast. It’s nice, listening to the low cadence of LQG’s voice as they’re walking along the path. SQQ even almost forgets his intended task (almost!)

LQG is telling the bit where he hand chopped the head of the beast open (as expected of his strong shidi!!) when SQQ takes his chance and brushes his hand slightly against LQG’s. and really, it’s almost comical how quickly LQG stops speaking and stiffens up. SQQ sighs in his heart. ofc. really, he’s not terribly surprised. ofc his most loyal, masculine, and straight shidi would be uncomfortable!!

SQQ looks to LQG to..uh laugh it off?? calmly apologize for intruding onto personal space?? and then. he sees it. a flush on LQG’s cheeks similar to last time and,, his ears are a bit red too now that’s he looking closely.

hmm?

HMM??

SQQ pauses, and lifts his hand again, this time caressing LQG’s arm (hopefully very sensually but it’s not like he’s an expert ok!!) before hooking his arm with LQG’s.

“Shidi, won’t you continue the story?” SQQ purrs, and ok yk what. admittedly he’s a bit embarrassed to be purposefully acting like this, but LQG’s eyes widen and his face turns even more red, and oh.

Oh.

*(gru voice: lighht buulb)*

…well, isn’t this surprising?

And so it begins (again). But this time, there’s purpose. It’s not just abt the points after all,, esp when his shidi is giving these adorable and frankly tsundere reactions. it’s amusing to SQQ and like,, can u blame him for wanting to see more??

system: ………. (ヾ;￣▽￣)ヾ!! ~~ Encouraging host!!

SQQ ties his inner robes loosely, so during meridian cleansing, his robes slip off just so, exposing his shoulder and part of his chest. there’s a choking sound behind him which causes SQQ to smile slyly, before calling out: “Ah, is shidi alright?” and ofc he gets no response, so he peeks back and ah, there it is!! LQG is not meeting his eyes and is instead focusing on circulating his qi but!, his face is bright red and SQQ….well he finds it absolutely delightful ;).

and so SQQ continues. on a mission together, he makes an excuse that he is “oh so dreadfully tired, won’t shidi let this one rest?” so he can take off his boots and free his aching feet, lifting his robes above his ankle while doing so. (there’s a loud bang behind him and he looks back to see LQG standing with his hands clenched next to a fallen tree w/ a very suspicious fist-shaped indent).

when they both attend a local festival, SQQ buys himself some tanghulu and he sucks it lightly before biting into it, savoring the sweet taste of the hardened sugar. he licks his lips before putting his mouth on the entirety of the snack again, and makes eye contact with LQG. LQG’s watching him intently, and oh? he’s not looking away? his shidi is getting rather bold hehe. so SQQ cheekily smiles , eyes curving up as he sucks the tanghulu once, then twice, before letting it bulge in his cheek. (gosh system wait tf am I doing?! he should feel embarrassed really!! ) but seeing LQG’s slack jaw and eyes glazed with…something, SQQ finds that he doesn’t rly mind.

and it goes on. SQQ accidentally trips and falls onto his shidi, pushing him down so he’s straddling him….

LQG cuts SQQ some fruit and SQQ uses his mouth to eat it directly from LQG’s fingers…

SQQ leans against LQG’s firm..and strong…and very wide chest after the meridian cleansing….

and now SQQ is watching LQG sleep (NOT creepily ok) , after insisting that they can share the bed in the hotel, cuz “no shidi i will not allow you to sleep on the floor!”

and SQQ isn’t entirely dumb ok, it’s not like he wasnt aware of what he was doing!! at first it rlly was to see LQG’s reactions!!

but SQQ’s come to realize that he…maybe kinda sorta likes it?? He likes LQG’s attention on him, he likes it when LQG looks at him with those eyes. Moreover, he likes LQG.

and he can kinda sorta bet that LQG likes him too?? //SQQ recalls the moment when he burst out laughing after seeing SQH trip and fall on his face (serves that hack author right!!) and then a screen pops up to the side: +35 B-Points!! Good job host kya~~!! ^^ and SQQ is like ?????

he looks next to him only to see LQG watching him w/ a gentle smile, his eyes almost,, fond?? (SQQ quite literally feels his heart beating faster and ah it’s almost winter, why is it so warm ??)//

SQQ blushes just thinking abt it, his Liu-shidi really is too OP!! he’s distracted so SQQ doesn’t see the once sleeping LQG open his eyes to blearily look at him.

“Shen Qingqiu.” the voice is still sleepy and the words are followed up with a small yawn.

“Sleep.” An arm comes to wrap around SQQ’s waist, to pull him closer and SQQ doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry, so he nestles his head on LQG’s chest instead and thinks with resolution, “ah tmrw then” before falling asleep.

(SQQ confesses, and the bed is put to a much better use wink wink)

the end mwah

#the system: congratulations! congratulations! congratulations! good things must be said three times!#now unlocking new storyline: Love Interest Liu Qingge!#Activating Free Play Mode!! Good luck Host! kya kya #anyway #Omg this turned out so long WTH LMAO #but also this was a fanfic idea i had for so long (like #i mean i has this idea stewing for 5 YEARS!! 💀💀#but im literally so lazy to write something formal so here it is #any grammar mistakes or OOC-ness or weird writing in general is airplanes fault ok #i wrote this in one sitting after finishing a major essay i had for class #and #i kinda wanted to add more scenes but ;-; i am a lazy bum and i don’t wanna type more 🧍🏾‍♀️#anyway liushen lives happily ever after and SQQ rides LQG off into the sunset wait who what who said that #liushen #liu qingge #shen qingqiu #svsss #mxtx svsss #scum villian self saving system

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findafight · 1 year ago

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RE the posts about Nancy and Jon just kinda leaving the kids to their own devices; I find it very telling that in season four that despite Steve complaining a number of times about being the babysitter, none of the kids raise any objections to him being the babysitter, despite what it implies about them. It’s Nancy who reminds him “they aren’t babies anymore”.

I used to find that kind of funny, the idea that they might kind of like being babied a bit by Steve (for whom indulging younger kids is still a novelty). And it’s fascinating to me how Mike in particular, despite regarding Steve with utter disdain, feels entitled to Steve’s time and attention. Even *months* after Nancy has broken up with him, and Mike could just follow her lead and not have anything more to do with him, *Mike’s* the one ringing the service bell until Robin shouts for Steve.

The kids are maybe a little bit clingier than we or the characters give them credit for, eh?

(This reading gets really interesting when you consider that out of all the teens/adults, Steve’s probably worked/fought alongside them the most and knows full well what they’re capable of.)

I think Steve being someone the younger teens look up to as both a friend and as a leader is probably key. The age difference between them is enough that it makes a difference in how they look up to him and small enough that they'll be functional equals given a few years, but that they'll still defer to him. They like Steve! I think they like knowing that there's someone older willing to call some of the shots and take the heat y'know? Even if they also want to contribute to the decisions it's nice for them to know he has their backs.

Tbh I think Mike and Steve butt heads for the bit. Like they biker and groan about each other but Steve still thinks of Mike as maybe kind of annoying (as are. All fourteen year olds 🫡) one of his (mildly ungrateful) little friends. Of course it would be Mike ringing the bell repeatedly, he and Mike show friendly affection by being obnoxious motherfuckers to each other.

Sooo correct that what makes it different than Nancy and Jon, was that even though they've all gone through Upside Down stuff, Nancy and Jon went through it together, while Steve went through it, starting in S2, with the young teens. They see him and even though they stop Billy from killing him he saves them (specifically Mike!!) In the tunnels. It sort of establishes Steve as someone they KNOW is going to take charge to help them. They can and have! Mike knows he can rely on Nancy, probably, but he doesn't have the same...proof? I guess? That he does of Steve.

I think it's natural for them, even as they get older, to defer to Steve. He's sort of invincible to them, and they trust him. Does this make sense? They can call their own shots but I think maybe they'll also go "right, Steve?" Even if just in their brains.

#steve harrington #mike wheeler #steve and the party #steve and mike #stranger things #findaanswers #anonasaurus #stranger things meta #as a full grown adult i still fall back on thinking my brother has hos shit together more than me and there's less than three years between #tho my little sister thinks im an idiot

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ashipiko · 5 months ago

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ASHI - BIRTHDAY JACKET VIGNETTE 🌺

(PART 1 - 2.7)

ASHI: Hmhm~ A bday Interview, huh? It looked super funsies when everyone else did it, so I’m hyped!

ASHI: I’m guessing since we’re in the Pomedorms… A Pom? But who, exactly…

ASHI: (Ahaha, as nice as Rook and Vil are, I might end up feeling the pressure a little. It’d be an honor, obvs, but #stressful…!)

ASHI: (O Magical Birthday Dice, please have mercy…!)

???: Oi, Ashi!

EPEL: Happy Birthday! You weren’t expecting me, were you?

ASHI: Waugh?! Eppy! Hahaha, what a pleasant surprise!

ASHI: I’m so stoked you’re my interviewer! Who knew I’d get so lucky?

EPEL: No need to flatter me, you know. Thank you for having me.

ASHI: Pssh, why’re you acting so uptight, Eppy? It’s just me! I like your lingo and stuff.

EPEL: I’d love to, but… We’re still in the Pomefiore dorms, you know. I never know if Vil is lurking around or not…

ASHI: Ahh, fair point. Bummer. Maybe next time!

EPEL: Ehe, maybe. Anyway, here’s my birthday present to you. I hope you enjoy.

ASHI: Only one way to find out!

ASHI: Whoa… This is so cute?! And so fluffy…! I needed something to keep me warm at Ramshackle!

ASHI: There’s even little fox ears on it! And it’s my favorite color! Eppy…!

EPEL: I told my Granny about your birthday coming up, and since she enjoyed your company so much during Harveston…

EPEL: She asked for some things that you like and stirred this up. If anything, you should be giving the thanks to her.

ASHI: I thank the entire Felmier fam! It’s so cute, I’m gonna cry…! I’m about to wear this right now!

EPEL: You’re a summer baby, Ashi! Watch out for the heat…

EPEL: And I still have a new stock of apple cider coming in too, from my family’s farm. Your presents don’t just end there, heh.

ASHI: More?! I still haven’t finished the last one you gave me…

ASHI: No sweat! We’ll just plan another hangout at Ramshackle and chug ‘em all down together~.

EPEL: Unless Ace gets jealous and barges in again. That darn simp can’t get enough of ya.

ASHI: Hehe. Maybe I should make a no-Ace sign for next time, to put on Ramshackle’s dorm. Thoughts?

EPEL: I’ll help ya make it!

EPEL: O-Oh right, the interview. Maybe it was a little bit of a mistake pairing us up together, we keep on chatting…

ASHI: Nono! This is a Eppy W, DW!

EPEL: If you say so. First question…

EPEL: If you could take any person with you to a deserted island, who would it be? I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t take one of the ghosts or Grim, but it can’t be someone from your dorm.

ASHI: Grimmy’s great! But for survival… Ehh…

ASHI: NGL, a deserted island sounds kinda scaries, as much as I love the beach. Like yeah, I’d love to hang, but survival? Hecks naw!

EPEL: Sounds about right. You’re really like a princess.

ASHI: Mhm! If I really wanted to, I could probably get to the basics by myself if I tried. But do I wanna? No.

ASHI: It’d probably be a good idea to get paired with someone who knows what they’re doing, y’know? At the very least, I can depend on them!

EPEL: So someone who can take care of you? Leona, maybe? Since he already babies you… Alternatively, I don’t really think Ace would be the best choice, no offense.

ASHI: None taken. He deserves it. But nope! This is a fun scenario, right? I might as well go out with a bang, or someone I can have fun with.

ASHI: So, I say Floyd!

EPEL: Floyd?!

ASHI: Aye aye, cap’n! You get it, don’tcha? He’s so tall and could get all the coconuts! I think we’d have a lot of fun, too.

EPEL: I know you work at Monstro Lounge, but aren’t you scared of him still? He’s a little unpredictable, so he clashes with you.

ASHI: Well, that’s what makes him fun, right? I guess it’s all depending on his mood…

ASHI: One time we accidentally totally crashed Monstro Lounge ‘cause he freaked me out, hehe. It’s a little scary when you’re doing a closing shift and all you hear is a tiny “shriiiimpy~” in the distance.

ASHI: My fear of the dark TOTALLY kicked in then. I never screamed so loud in my entire life!

EPEL: I can imagine… Sharp teeth, glowy eyes and all.

ASHI: I tried getting back at him once too, when I blended some shiitake mushrooms into his milkshake.

ASHI: …I don’t think I’ve ever even ran that fast before, TBH.

EPEL: Ashi, this isn’t really helping your case, if I’m being honest… You’re making it sound like he’d eat you by the time someone saved you two.

ASHI: W-Well! On the other hand, he’s got that eel form that we can rely on too! If we get bored, we can just zoom on out and crash Azul’s place or something, y’know?

EPEL: I guess I see your point. Being a merman must means he could help a lot on an island…

ASHI: Yup, yup! Anyway, I think we’re good enough buds where I’m 97% sure he wouldn’t eat me!~

EPEL: Heh, classic Ashi. I guess in a way you really did think it through, even if it sounded odd at first.

ASHI: Of coursies! ♪

EPEL: Okay, about time for our next question.

EPEL: If you were to transfer to a different dorm, which would you pick?

ASHI: Oh, a good one! I think I’ve kinda cheated with my Ramshackle prefect rights, hehe. I’m a little bit of a dorm-hopper.

ASHI: But a permanently different dorm…~ I think about it sometimes.

EPEL: Really? Which dorms?

EPEL: I think I could see you fitting in Heartslabyul, since you’re pretty good at sticking to the rules. Riddle likes you a lot too, more than he likes Ace, at least.

ASHI: Oho? Tell me more, Eppy!

EPEL: Um… I think Scarabia could fit you too. You and Kalim are sort of one and the same, don’t you see it?

ASHI: I see whatchu mean!

EPEL: Yeah. I couldn’t ever see you in anything like Savanaclaw, Ignihyde, or Diasomnia, though.

EPEL: You don’t really have an athletic, competitive, or magic drive… Ignihyde is a whole can of worms.

EPEL: I don’t think you could stand a day in that dorm, with the dark, creepy skeletons everywhere.

ASHI: Waugh… Don’t remind me, Eppy!

EPEL: Not to mention, the housewarden. As soon as you see him in person, I think the Headmaster would have to get called over for medical issues—

ASHI: Hey hey! No need to out me like that…!

EPEL: Heh, sorry Ashi. Was I right, at least?

ASHI: Hmm… yeah! Not right on the nose, though.

ASHI: I think that if I were to be in a dorm… I’d pick Pomefiore.

EPEL: I didn’t really consider it, but I could see it now that you say it. The uniform would fit you, I think.

ASHI: Yeah! And we’d get to be twinsies!

ASHI: Ashi-Eppy, the Birthday swapped duo! 5/6 and 6/5! ☆

EPEL: Heheh. You’d definitely be a shine of sunlight in here. It would be fun to hang out with you at Pomefiore.

EPEL: But you don’t use makeup, don’t you? That’d be a sure-fire way to stand out.

ASHI: Yeah, that’s be the only downside…

ASHI: And the food, right?! It looks so… appetizer-core. Defo not up my alley, I couldn’t imagine…

ASHI: But Vil and Rook are cool! At least at Pomefiore, I know there’s people that can help accommodate me and make sure I’m happy and healthy!

ASHI: Maybe instead of a potato, I can became a French fry… Sounds kinda banger, don’t you think?

EPEL: You make a funny argument.

ASHI: Life at Ramshackle can get kinda stressful, you know! I love the ghosts and all, but it’s scary sometimes…

ASHI: Grimmy thinks it’s funny to prank me, and he’ll just graze over my legs as I’m sleeping, and it’s so freaky!

ASHI: Dunno, man… It’d be nice to see him get some karma and have to keep it all up-tight at Pomefiore.

ASHI: But I guess at the end of the day, the thing that I’m missing at my dorm is the constant hustle and bustle.

EPEL: People would kill for that, you know.

ASHI: Also true~.

ASHI: Well, there’s no silence you can’t fix with a simple hangout! I can always count on you to make Ramshackle a little more lively, right Eppy?

EPEL: That’s right! The Ashi— Eh… Eppy duo can reign at Ramshackle!

ASHI: Darn right, hahaha!

ASHI: D’aww, is it already the end of the interview…?

EPEL: Yep. It’s ‘round time for yer good-luck gift!

ASHI: Wow, hometown-Eppy makes a comeback?! That doesn’t sound good for me at all—!

EPEL: Trust me, yer gonna wanna brace yerself. ‘Cause I ain’t goin’ easy on ya, even if you are a girl!

ASHI: Oh boy… Guess I shouldn’t hold back either, huh?

ASHI: …Pfft! KK, bring it on!~

EPEL: Prepare yerself!

EPEL: Happy Birthday, Ashi!

CARD: UNLOCKED!

GROOVY: UNLOCKED!

#twstshi #ashi’s birthday campaign! 🌺#epel felmier #twst epel #twst #twst yuu #twst oc #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland yuu #twisted wonderland oc

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the-whispers-of-death · 7 months ago

Note

Thinking about my Canine Handler! Stone x aggressive Dog Hybrid! Reader and I raise you (or myself, I guess) Canine Handler! Kali with aggressive Dog Hybrid! Reader. 🫧

Same concept, Kali is Reader’s last chance because he tore his last handler apart (the handler kinda deserved it though, he wasn’t very nice). Kali looking at his collection of feral children and thinking “eh, what’s one more?”

Reader immediately lunging at Kali and only being stopped by the fact that the too-tight collar is attached to a heavy metal post or the wall or something - if a person was holding it, they would have been dragged along. Kali being immediately angry but not at Reader, instead at the conditions they’re keeping him in.

Kali somehow calming down Reader enough that he can give him skritches behind the ear, Reader is confused because instead of lashing out at him for trying to kill him he’s just like “shh, it’s okay, Daddy’s here” while glaring down whoever is in charge of Reader right now because it’s pissing it down freezing rain and they have him tied to a post outside.

Canine Handler!Kali is so Daddy. He immediately unties you from the post and gets you inside, very carefully approaching you with slow movements when he needs to towel you off due to you being out in the rain. He's not scared you'll lash out at him, he just doesn't want to scare you.

His words are soft when he speaks to you, a stark contrast to the way his words are so clipped with whoever had tied you to the post. He's giving your scratches behind your ears, cooing at you.

Kali is so pissed when he finds out you haven't been fed your dinner yet, so he goes and gives you food, his heart breaking at the way you eat it so fast because your previous handlers took away your food when you were "bad". Don't you worry, Daddy Kali won't do that to you, he'll prove it to you too.

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pro-mammonologist · 1 year ago

Text

Demons Are a Girl’s Best Friend

A fun vacation to the mountains! The brothers are fascinated by the human world and even more fascinated by the human world’s interpretation of them. After exploring a local church, Asmodeus learns of Mc’s relationship with the church as well as igniting an interesting fantasy of theirs.

What happens when the brothers discover Mc’s more impure fantasies? (Plenty of irony)

Note: inspired by the song Demons Are a Girl’s Best Friend by Powerwolf, if you’re okay with a little bit of metal, you’ll love this and want it in your obey me playlist

GN!Poly!Mc but with a coochie x All Bros

This chapter is SFW with NSFW conversation but no explicit action. The MC also has religious trauma so yeah.

Chapter 1: “theres a phantom lust to wake”

You shielded your eyes from the light blistering down on your skin. Having been in the Devildom so long, you forgot the intensity of the sun. You were thankful it was warm considering the coolness of the Devildom, it was a nice change, it was familiar. You packed cool clothes, making sure that your outfits were nice and airy for your trip. The brothers did the same, considering how their bodies had adjusted to the coolness of the Devildom, you already had Asmo and Mammon droning on about the heat only a few hours into your arrival.

Yes, your arrival. Lucifer wanted a trip with all of you and everyone said the usual beach, camping, famous city 1, famous city 2, and Lucifer of course suggested a factory tour but you wanted to relax. So, Satan suggested a more scenic trip, a nature trip. You loved the idea, being a lover of adventure. At least with them! So you all got to planning you settled on a mountain trip. Central Europe has many different attractions but none compare to the beauty of the mountains, especially in Switzerland.

“Man, ever been here before?” Mammon asked to no one in particular.

Satan opened your travel guide. “No, I don’t think any of us have been at least not to this one specifically.”

You looked out the window next to Mammon, lofting yourself from the seat on your train. “Are we not going to the alps?”

Lucifer chuckled from across you. “The alps would be boring… what if you’ve gone before?” He sipped at his tea, swirling the cup around before placing it on the tray in front you.

“I’m human, Lucifer, and this stuff costs money and time! What makes you think I’d have explored the alps in their entirety!” The scenery outside was enough to keep you fascinated, let alone the mountain trip approaching.

You could hear faint snoring behind you in the aisle and Beel munching on whatever food he had. Levi was babbling about how he’s seen this exact area in such and such while Asmo doted on the woman on the other side of the train. They pulled straws to choose who’d be sitting with you, short had to sit the next aisle over. They’re convinced Mammon cheated, but he insisted that if that were the case he wouldn’t have Lucifer in the same row as you two. Lucifer was offended, but it was entertaining to listen to them bicker as Satan told you about his most recent series.

You were on the train for much longer than you figured you’d be, causing eventually the whole party to lament. Once you arrived, you all were thrilled and ready to explore, but what caught everyone’s attention the fastest was the cathedral in the middle of the town.

“Beautiful architecture.” Lucifer noted, smiling to himself. “Catholic imagery has always had its appeal despite its not so kind depiction of us.” You could hear Satan scoff and you giggled at his reaction.

“I agree.” you could smell the incense from the exit of the train station. “I was shocked to find you and Satan are two separate beings.” You moved toward Lucifer as Beel lifted Belphie and his bags back up.

“Man, churches are kinda eh, if you ask me. Pretty but uncomfortable!” Mammon thumbed his nose up and pushed his sunglasses up, though with the current weather, they are unneeded. “Ain’t these places supposed to be sunny?”

“It’s Europe,” you sighed, “it’s always cloudy!”

“Still too hoooooot…” Asmo whined. “And we have to walk to where we are staying??? Ugh!” He looked exhausted despite having just sat for hours. “I’m already so beat!”

Satan started walking eastward. “Well, to rest, we need to actually get there first!”

“Well, that building has people giving out refreshments!” Beel notes, also feeling thirsty and tired. And hungry. “Maybe they have food.”

“Uhhhh,” you start, ready to protest but Mammon, Asmo, Levi and Beel (also Belphie) are already heading that direction.

“I don’t see why we can’t go inside. Perhaps we might learn something interesting.” Lucifer suggests and Satan gives up on trying to get to the cabin and follows suit. You give in as well.

Getting up close, you’re even more impressed. The stained glass and Roman build, the renaissance ambience, its all amazing. You inhale the scent of incense again and exhale. It’s hard to not be familiar with any Christian establishment in this world, especially of a Catholic nature and within Europe. Nuns were walking around the courtyard and they greet your party, speaking German. Satan speaks it eloquently and they offer to give you home baked bread. Beel obliges and eats it up in seconds.

“Danke.” You feel strange, receiving food from a place you abandoned long ago. You find it strange how the brothers seem so unbothered by it’s presence, but considering the various interpretations of demons, it makes sense.

“So holy water won’t burn huh?” You ask Asmo, who is drinking to his hearts content.

“This is bottled water, sweetie… I don’t think it’s holy unless they bless it.” He winks and offers the rest to you.

“Yeah… I think it’s funny how you guys are so… chill.” You trail off and fixate onto the crucifix adorning the doors of the church.

Asmo blinks and looks at you deeply. “It’s just a building. Humans get a lot of stuff wrong about us, don’t worry.” He sees your sudden shift in mood. “I love how cute you get when you’re worried.” He tries to soften the mood and make you smile.

Your eyes remain transfixed on the building. “I’m not worried, I just never thought I’d be back at one of these after meeting you guys. Any house of worship, really, especially a Christian one.”

Asmo looks confused. “I don’t really know this stuff, I just know they think we torture bad humans and there’s like 9 layers of the Devildom… oh and that Lilith was a human that corrupted the first human man or whatever.” He leans in closer. “Do the books and stuff say anything about me????”

“Yeaaahh.” You respond and finally look away from the doors. “I don’t really remember that much. All I really remember is the stuff about Lucifer.”

He pouts and walks to the doors. “Man, why is he so special. He’s beautiful but he isn’t me.” He pushed them open and the sound of the old doors creaking open make you jump.

The nuns look over in your direction and your face goes red. Satan comes up from behind you and grabs your shoulders. “Jumping like that makes you seem more demon than we.” He looked down at you and you shuffled out of his grip.

“Those things are too loud to be that old.” You hear Mammon say looking toward you. He has a cheeky grin on his face and his sunglasses now folded and hanging on his shirt. “Don’t worry,” he nudges, “I’ll protect ya from any scary nuns.”

You roll your eyes but can’t help but smile. Satan looks to where Asmo has stopped inside, admiring the—

“Gold!” Mammon shouts and chases after Asmo.

“There he goes again… do you want to go inside?” Satan asks you and you look aside to the rest of the brothers who are now looking toward you.

“It seems like…” you look at their eager and curious faces. “You all want to go in.”

“Is it wrong to be curious? We never get that much time here especially in a place with fictional depictions of us. You could say it’s like we are evil celebrities here.” Satan mentions and he’s right. Who wouldn’t want to know what someone wrote about them, especially if that many people believe it.

“Okay.” You say, nodding. “I wouldn’t mind seeing what they’re burning. It smells really good.”

You go inside and find yourself shoulder to shoulder with Asmo once again who was scurrying around trying to figure out what everything is. “Hey! Mc, what’s that man doing?”

“He’s going into confession.” You answer bluntly.

“Confession?” Asmo ponders aloud.

Mammon interrupts, “yeah you don’t know what that is? You confess to people stuff.”

“Kinda. But to a priest and it’s your sins.” You add, moving along to find where the smell is coming from.

“Ooooh… so it’s like that ‘daddy, sorry I’ve been naughty’ thing!” Asmo looks jubilant.

“Uh, more like ‘forgive me father, for I have sinned.’” Their ignorance is shocking. Don’t they know anything? “You really not know that or are you joking?”

Asmo taps his finger on his lip. “What’s the difference?”

Both you and Mammon look shocked now. You say, “uh, ones horny ones not!”

Asmo looks offended almost. “Are you not supposed to be horny in church?”

You froze and blinked for a minute. “Huh?” Thank the gods that there aren’t any English speakers around. “You… Asmo, you know lust is a sin.”

“Obviously but I was curious! It’s really funny that sorta stuff is sinful even though I see sexy nun costumes all over the place at Halloween in the human world. Don’t forget sexy priest too!”

It’s unfathomable what you hear from them sometimes, especially when it makes no sense. They’ve mastered your language, understand human pop culture for the most part, they even know some chunks of human history, but the one thing they don’t know is directly about them?

Lucifer joins your group. “You seem rather shocked, Mc. Is something wrong?”

“How do you not know anything about the group responsible for the whole religion condemning you?” You ask and Lucifer sighs.

“Well, as you know, I’ve long detested how I am depicted as well as the fact that Satan and I aren’t even considered separate beings. Truth be told, I just never encouraged them or myself to learn anything about it after the fall. I didn’t want them to be upset. Now, since you’re here, I think we might be more willing to interact with it.” Lucifer looks content and his words sound honest. That also makes sense but it’s still very mind-boggling their ignorance. “Mc, I only know what I’ve been told to be honest. I know much more about other depictions of demons that might be more accurate to us. But most human tales are a bit ridiculous.” Lucifer notes, scrolling to show you an image of Baphomet. “You mean to tell me most humans think this is me when it quite literally isn’t even me in the tale itself?”

“Yeah, I guess if it got that crazy, I would stay out of it too. Plus it’s not like you could really intervene and tell people it isn’t true.” You feel Lucifer’s cold hand on the small of your back. “Huh?”

“I’m curious, what did you think when you were going to meet us?” Lucifer looks at you, smiling.

“Well… a lot to be honest. Demons are depicted as deceitful, they’re to lure humans into sin. They’ll often treat you kindly, seduce you, or do whatever to make you feel safe and then take everything from you so I sorta expected that… but also I knew deep down that there’s no way that’s all true.” You answer him honestly.

He chuckles. “We do treat you kind, seduce you, and try to make you feel safe. Do you worry we are manipulating you?” He’s smiling but he’s hiding concern in his voice.

“Truth be told, the church manipulates so much that I figured I’d be used to it.” You only make him laugh again. “I know you guys love me.”

“Hmm, if I was expected to confess all of my wrongdoings to one person I’d feel terrible as well. That’s a lot of power to give one person, Mc.” His hand remains on your back and is now accompanied by Asmo’s arm.

“Heyyyy! We can all get a touch, can’t we??? I’d happily confess all my naughty thoughts to you, Mc!” Asmo snakes himself in between you and Lucifer. “And all the naughty things I’ve done.

“I’m sure you would.” You grin now, a thought coming into your head. “Say, wonder what that priest would say if I told him I’ve been bedding with demons.”

Lucifer grinned. “I’m sure they’d consider you quite the sinful human. I imagine sleeping with demons make for quite the punishment?” You nudged him playfully and stood by him for a minute.

“Don’t go getting too many ideas now.”

The clouds in the sky were heavy, ready to downpour. Lucifer pulled them group out of the church and you said your goodbyes to the nuns and made your way to your lodgings. It wasn’t too long of a journey, the rain only began when you were a few blocks from it. Lucifer rented an airbnb for your group and it was a homely loft, almost castle-like. It was clearly an older structure but had been receiving regular updates. It had only 4 bedrooms, but a multitude of beds for you all to share.

“So who gets to sleep with Mc?” Oh no. It has begun.

Beel asked the question innocently and Mammon was the first to speak up. “Obviously me!”

Asmo next. “Well, I think they want to sleep with me.”

Then Belphie half asleep. “Me n’ Beel should share.”

And then Satan. “I came up with the idea for the trip so I should pick where I sleep first and I choose where Mc plans to stay.”

Then Lucifer. “You picked it and I did the planning, I deserve first pick.”

Then Levi. “I never get to go first so I should!”

It was always bound to be chaos when you had to share rooms especially with seven demons completely obsessed with you.

You spoke up. “Let me try to make this fair. I guess I should choose first?”

They all agreed and you wandered the space. One room was large with one king sized bed in the middle, accompanied by a large window showing you the outside view of the woods. It was a dark room, much like the rest of the loft. Next there was another large room, this one with one bunk bed and another bed caddy cornered against the wall. It only has one window and small laterns hung to the ceiling, it’s charming and fantasy like. Thirdly, there’s another slightly smaller room complete with two beds next to each other, it wasn’t anything impressive, just like a hotel room complete with dark academia ambience. And lastly, a room about the same size as the next, another set of beds similar to the previous room but this time, it had a large window the exact same as the first room. The view in this one was certainly on par with the first one and you debated over which one.

But the answer was clear to you. “I want the first room. One more person can fit in the bed with me.” They looked as though they were ready to fight. “Okay, let’s do it this way… pick a number 1-50.”

“Ugh… 7.” Belphie answered.

“33.” Satan.

“I was gonna choose that one! 44.” Mammon.

“12.” Lucifer.

“Hmm… 24.” Levi.

“18!” Asmo.

And then Beel. “40.”

You waited a moment before saying who won. “Asmo gets to sleep with me.”

The brothers sighed of annoyance as Asmo celebrated and came up to you. “Yaaay! We’re gonna have lots of fun together.” He wrapped his arms around your hips and you pushed him back.

“Don’t get too touchy now. And don’t go feeling me up as I try to go to sleep, ‘kay???”

He pouted. “That’s no fun but I guess I will listen.”

You all started to move into your rooms and settle in. You could see the sunsetting as the downpour was intense. The sound was nice and calming, it made you want to cuddle up and relax with the brothers, but other things were on their minds. You walked up to the window to watch as the rain fell, gazing out into the woods.

“Mc, what are you thinking about?” Asmo asked, plopping onto the bed.

“Nothing really, just shocked Lucifer didn’t check the weather better.” You answered, briefly gazing back at Asmo.

“It must’ve not been in the forecast. You seemed upset earlier.” His voice went serious. “Was the church uncomfy for you?” He pulled at your arm to get you to sit on the bed.

“You could say that. I was kinda worried about you guys too. But really… there’s just not a lot of good in places like that. Even though they pretend to be good.” You chose your words wisely, not wanting to venture deeper.

He waited a moment before responding. “Okay. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Yeah I’m good, to be honest…” you trailed off and your cheeks went pink. “I joked with Lucifer about how the priest would react if he found out I’ve been fucking you guys.”

Asmo giggled. “I imagine they’d be jealous, hun.” He rolled onto his back and cocked his head. “Ever seen any pretty ones?”

“Pretty priests??? Most of them are old.” You laughed, confused by his question.

“Well, it’d be funny if I were to seduce one huh? As a demon? It might be fun!” He suggested, his brain filling with naughty ideas.

You laid back beside him. “Well, they’re people too. I bet they wanna fuck.”

He turned his head to you slowly. “Have you ever been attracted to anyone of a pure status?”

You squinted at him, smirking. “Well, it is interesting to consider defiling them. But no one has ever caught my eye.”

“Demons love to corrupt.”

“Yeah I know.”

“Mc, I have… an idea.”

Uh oh. You looked at him and shrugged. “Okay.”

“You’ve already been corrupted by demons, so why not get punished by priests.” He suggested, nonchalantly.

“You want me to go get fucked by priests?” You were shocked, looking at him like he’s crazy.

“No silly, even better! Us pretending to be priests!!!! See, it sounds fun!”

Asmo was a man of many talents and many thoughts, but this one hit multiple parts of your psyche. Religious trauma, arousal, demons, kinks, and your insatiable lust for all of the above to be combined. Something you didn’t know until now. Well. Really, that’s a lie. It has always been arousing to consider how, as Asmo said, they’ve corrupted you, but to fantasize about retribution? Now, that’s new.

Asmo ran his hand up your arm. “Mc, you’ve been thinking a while…”

You snapped back in. “I like that idea.” You couldn’t be shy around him anymore, there’s no point with how well he can read you now. “So you wanna include the rest of them?”

“Satan and Lucifer will likely love this idea. Lucifer loves to punish as you know.” Asmo leaped up from the bed. “Let me go ask them now!”

“Hey!” You raced after him and he shouted for everyone to gather in the middle of the room. You were already feeling hot, embarrassment searing through you.

The brothers walked out of their rooms, complaining of being summoned, too tired, or annoyed. Asmo grinned eagerly and awaited for you to get beside him.

“So! Our lovely Mc confided in me of something naughty!” Asmo wrapped an arm around you and you saw the mood of the room instantly change.

“Naughty?” Lucifer’s mouth widened into a grin. “Do tell.”

The rest of them all nodded in agreement. Belphie yawned. “We just got here and they’re horny huh?”

You shot Belphie daggers with your eyes. “Asmo suggested I merely agreed.” He laughed at your response and looked at Asmo, eagerly awaiting to hear your fantasy.

“Mc has been dirtied by all of us, corrupted and fucked nice and good, so it’s up to the holy to punish them for their sins, is it not?”

Satan was the first to respond. “And we are to take up these holy roles?” He leaned on the railing to the stairs, propping his elbows up and resting his chin on his hands, his eyes lowering. “I quite like that.”

Lucifer chuckled. “Sounds interesting.”

“So we’re gonna punish ‘em?” Mammon looked to you, his face unreadable.

Levi came up beside Mammon, making him jump. “Ohhhh this is like that one episode of That One Time I Got Turned Into A Human! I know exactly what to do!” Levi looked even more excited that Satan or Lucifer.

Beel was still quiet but he looked deep in thought. When his eyes met yours you instantly knew what he was thinking about. You could see hunger in his eyes, this one not for food.

“So we’re all in agreement? Why don’t we do it tonight since we are all rained in?” Mammon broke the silence and to your own surprise as well.

“Hm, it’s short notice but I’m sure we can negotiate a scene.” Lucifer nodded and looked around to see everyone’s reactions and then his gaze landed back on you. “Shall we get on with it then?”

You breathed in deeply. “Yeah.”

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me x mc #obey me nightbringer #lucifer x mc #mammon x mc #leviathan x mc #Satan x mc #asmo x mc #beel x mc #Belphie x mc #obey me smut

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weird-dere-writes · 5 months ago

Text

Implied Latina reader <3

Imagining if Boothill began to have a rival of sorts 😏

Our Space Ranger is simply minding his business as he travels the galaxy trying to take down the IPC. He’s always on the hunt of course. He begins to notice though how more and more, a specific someone ends up going after the same bounties he does. It is purely by coincidence in actuality, but he begins to wonder if this is purposeful. If he’s being tracked or something.

It is of no threat to him, as he knows his way around gunshots and gallant conflict. But it does make him grind his teeth at times. Especially if the bounty is nabbed just before he gets the chance.

And who is it that torments our celestial cowboy so? He hasn’t yet learned her name or even an alias. But in what some would call a funny and he a bothersome turn of events, she would come to be called the Stellar Ranchera.

Sneaky little thing, she is. Always keeping things on the downlow until she’s on the heels of her bounty. Then… then is when everything becomes a show. She’s just as flashy and confident as he is, if not more in these moments. And those who catch wind of it, seem to snicker at the thought that Boothill finally begins to have a taste of what it is like to deal with him.

The first time the two come into contact, face to face, while going after the same bounty is quite interesting. When they realize who one another is, she smiles, and he pouts. They’re both running fast, jumping over obstacles, running against walls, doing flips and all as they try to out hunt the other, one phrase ringing in both of their minds.

‘The bounty is mine.’

As the chase goes on though, they start to focus more and more and each other rather than their target. The goal becomes to confront, outwit, and outperform one another.

The bounty is long forgotten as the two use a space to duke it out. Boothill is slinging his guns. The Ranchera, though she has a gun, prefers other tools. Her main weapon of choice is a whip. The other weapons she used were crossed in holsters on the back of her hips. Two machetes.

For a human, Boothill had to admit she was pretty adept at dodging bullets. Had his thoughts not been clouded with the want to defeat her, he would have said she did it beautifully.

The more the two went for each other, the more this battle seemed to be like a dance. Attacking and dodging strikes and blows in perfect sync. Twisting and turning and jumping and narrowly yet masterfully just missing one another. It’s quite the sight to behold. Though they seem to think identically, it almost seems she’s flawlessly antithetical him with every move. It didn’t help she seemed to be enjoying it more than anything; yelling these things he couldn’t understand. Something like… Bail? And… ‘hey so’. Or somethin’.

Amidst the fight, she manages to steal both his pistols using that handy whip.

“Not bad, for a southern boy.”

Boothill stops his pursuit momentarily and stares as she flips his gun around her hand like a true sharpshooter.

“And what am I t’ take that ta mean, Miss?”

She shrugs, “Oh it’s nothing against you, vaquero. ‘Sides, I’m kinda southern too. In another way.”

“Back-a-what?? Anyway, why’re you so intent on nabbin my bounties, nice lady?”

“I think I should be asking you that, actually. Not that you’d answer, pretty boy. Clearly these marks have my name on them.”

“Well,” he chuckles humorlessly, the pet name sliding right past his attention, “I’ll be forked. Didn’t know you could just claim whatever prize you wanted. It was my understandin’, that it ain’t yers ‘til ya catch it.”

“Maybe brush up on your knowledge then, eh?”

There’s only an annoyed chuckle as a response before he lunges at her. She again dodges as he grabs at her; gaining enough distacne for him to start using that built in gun in his arm. She only laughs as the onslaught continues. She fires a few rounds herself, from his guns she stole.

As fun as this was, she did have someone to catch that was still getting away. In an act that surprised him, she tossed his guns back to him. Landing somewhere with a smirk on her face. When he shakes off his stupor, that smirk of his appears on his face.

“Awwww, did you feel bad fer lil’ ol’ me?”

“Oh pobrecito, no, of course not,” she coos, clearly mocking him before a smirk returns to her face. His own smirk turned into an annoyed frown again.

“I just have things to do, is all. Until next time, I suppose.”

And with that, she runs off before he can stop her. He stands there for a few moments looking after her; thoughts that are confused, annoyed curious, and more filling his head.

He sighs as he holds one of his guns up to inspect it, “Darn target muncher…”

Where’d she have to be anyways?

It took a few moments for his own words to click in his head.

“Shoot! The bounty!!”

#ranger beaux 🦾#boothill x reader #hsr boothill #twy writes ☀️

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immasock · 6 months ago

Note

Could you please do platonic child mc with the obey me characters where mc is like Amane Momose from Milgram? Sorry if it’s an uncomfortable request!!

I apologize in advance, I hadn’t heard of her before this so it may not be accurate

Obey me boys + Amane Momose Child!MC

Pronouns: They/Them

MC was a fairly quiet child. Always with a small smile on their face and choosing to stay out of most of the regular drama that comes with being in the HoL

Actually, they were pretty calm. It was a nice change of pace from the normal chaos

Lucifer:

Lucifer was actually quite fond of the young child

They weren’t like his brothers

They were very calm and collected

Often one of the more mature people in the room

They were someone he didn’t need to worry about

It was refreshing

Sure he wasn’t a fan that he has a child to take care of

And given their young age and maturity level, he is a little concerned

But they’re a good kid and he isn’t too worried

Mammon:

Now don’t get me wrong

He loves the kid

Just like he loves Luke

But

To him

They seem a little strange

He never knows what they’re thinking

They’ve always got that smile on their face

It’s creepy

Plus they don’t really engage with his little schemes and plans

They’re not really all that fun

Won’t stop him from trying tho

Leviathan:

He actually doesn’t mind the little one

He’s not particularly worried about them causing chaos and breaking any of his collectibles because they kinda just sit in the corner

Really they don’t seem all that interested in his collection anyways

It’s not that they aren’t

They are

They just aren’t going crazy over it

They’ll gladly listen to him talk about it tho

I think him and this MC would get along

Satan:

Another one that is kind of fond of the child

They’re a good reading buddy for him if they’re into books

If they do like books, he is more than happy to lend his out to them

He knows that he’ll get them back in a timely manner and that they’ll be in good condition

Other than that, he appreciates their calm demeanor and matureness

He’s also a little confused by the smile they often wear

Not that they can’t smile

It’s just that he can’t remember the last time he saw them where they weren’t smiling

I feel like he might try and make it into some mystery to solve if he got bored enough

Asmodeus:

Honestly?

He loves the kid

Of course

He thinks they’re adorable and can’t wait to dress them up and take pictures and all that

If they let him of course

But

Like mammon

He thinks they’re a little boring

They kinda just stand in the corner and watch everything going on instead of being involved

I feel like him and mammon would try and bring them out of their shell

Now if that works is up to you but that’s just what I think

Beelzebub:

I feel like he couldn’t care less

At least in the beginning

Again

He loves the kid

And he’ll protect them with his life if necessary

But both him and this kid are so quiet and they both kinda stay in the corner

More so MC but still

However

I feel like as the year goes on

He would grow quite fond of MC

It’s nice to have someone that gets him, yknow?

Besides Belphie of course

I think their friendship would be adorable

Belphegor:

Straight up does not care at first

Appreciates that they’re not loud like his brothers and that they don’t bother him

Like Beel, he grows to like MC but at the beginning

Doesn’t give two fucks

I feel like he would like them more than he likes normal MC at the beginning at least

They stay out of his business and he stays out of theirs

Kind of

He does grow curious about them

Cause they’re weird, right?

Like what 12 year old is this quiet?

They don’t do anything

There’s gotta be something about them

He’s sure of it

But he’ll figure it out some other time

For now

It’s nap time

Diavolo:

Absolutely adores the kid

Of course

He’s just excited they’re here

Plus they don’t really cause any issues he needs to worry about

So bonus

Also thinks they’re a little boring and will 100% try and pull them out of their comfort zone to get them out of their shell

He absolutely would not know what to do with this kid at first

He thought kids were supposed to like games and stuff

But this child is showing no interest in those things

He’ll figure it out eventually he’s sure

But until then

He’ll keep trying

Barbatos:

Big fan I feel like

Similarly to Lucifer, he likes how mature and calm they are

He’s more than happy to let them be

He understands that they like to keep to themselves and he can respect that

He may try and check on them every once in a while

But besides that

He’ll leave them be

I’m not really sure what else to say about Barb

He likes the kid

Solomon:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again

I do not trust this man around kids

I love him so much

He is my wife

But he will try his best to turn them into lab rats or some shit

Honestly he may succeed if someone doesn’t stop him

Someone will stop him

But still

I feel like he would view MC as something to figure out

Solomon, my beloved, leave the poor kid alone

Simeon:

Well

Right off the bat they have something in common

I think I read that they believe in god

So there’s that

I feel like the demon boys would either try and ignore it or would try and, not convert them, but maybe try and show them that Michael isn’t the good guy they think he is

Simeon also knows Michael isn’t a good guy but he’s less likely to try and tell MC that

I feel like MC may cling to the angels

Not really cling I suppose

But hang around them more often when they’re together

Just because they’re angels

Simeon respects MC and their choice to stay off to the side, observing everything instead

He may even join them honestly

He would absolutely base a character in his book off of them

Luke:

My son

I keep saying it but he’s just excited to have another kid around

He thinks they’re so cool

His human equivalent age is like 10 and this kid is supposed to be 12 I think so instantly it’s younger kid looking up to cool older kid

They’re so cool and quiet and calm and mysterious

Plus they love Michael?

He wants to be like them

For a bit at least

He would try but that doesn’t work out too well

He would keep trying tho

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me mc #obey me child mc #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphie #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me solomon #obey me simeon #obey me luke

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lemonnsss · 6 months ago

Text

Moral of the Story: Chapter 8

Warnings: Mild tangent based off of an actual conversation I had (I'm actually from D.C. so this was fun), one singular bad pun- it deserves its own warning, and probably strained warning.

Feedback is always appreciated

MotS Masterlist

Taglist: @vicmc624 , @mostlymarvelgirl , @yvonneeeee, @beetlejuicesupremacy , @moonlightreader649 , @whattheduckisupkyle , @chrisevans-realwife, @nekoannie-chan , @mrsbarnes32557038 , @imyourbratzdoll , @weallhaveadestiny

Word Count: 1.8k

“Apologies but until you had agreed and were here it was still considered confidential.”

“O-okay, um, where- or how should I start?”

The director stood across the bed from me, eyebrows furrowed, the room filled with silence apart from the constant, steady beeps of the machinery.

“How the hell should I know? You’re the one with the super-abilities.”

“Right, sorry, that was dumb. Do you know if any of his internal organs were damaged when he went under? Or have you had the chance to run any tests yet?”

“I’m sorry, what crash are we talking about?” Tony said, still standing in the doorway.

Fury pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance before responding, “When the Captain here decided to take a trip twenty thousand leagues under the sea he was in a, shall we say, pseudo-nazi aircraft with a fixed route on its way to the states. His options were to let the ship take its course and let millions die or take a nosedive, he took the latter, rather obviously. Speaking of,” the attention turned to me, “how did you know that?”

“Sir, I’m a licensed teacher from pre-k to high school- I’m not by any means immune to misinformation; although, I do have a bit more knowledge on the topic than most people- not to mention my…” my mind trailed off for a moment before coming back, “former colleague taught history, rather fitting as he lived through it, too.”

His one eye began to look me up and down, “Remind me, where did you work last? Aside from with the X-Men that is.”

There was an uncertainty in his voice that made the agents who went down the elevator with us glance at each other nervously. What I had seen twice in my less-than-a-day stint of knowing this man seemed uncommon or unsettling for those who had known him longer.

“I don’t believe I said. Besides, doesn’t your file on me say?” We were both fishing for information, a push and pull I’d grown adjusted to on the flight over.

He remained silent, motioning one of the residents to come over.

“S-so we ran s-some tests-,” he took a moment to breathe and calm himself down, he spoke with a light stutter, likely to have been more prevalent in his earlier years. It sounded like he had gotten speech therapy, and was likely better, nervous, but better, “a lot of the scans were, well are, useless. His blood, everything about him really, was frozen, barely mobile. So the extent of the internal injuries he potentially sustained upon impact is uncertain. I sent for some new prints of the scans we took last week, but they haven’t come in yet; they’ll probably arrive today but it’s pretty touch and go sometimes.” He finished talking with a meek smile, likely proud of how he handled the situation.

“You did the scans last week and they’re only coming in today?” I could feel the look of confusion that overtook my face, he chuckled lightly and rubbed his neck.

“Yeah, we don’t have the equipment to produce the scans here so we send them over to the hospital over in Takoma Park to print- they have the most up-to-date machinery, and they were the only ones willing to work with us privately- so it takes a bit of time.”

“Perks of D.C., eh? Either have the most outrageous tax or go out of district.”

“Exactly! Say, did you grow up ‘round here?”

“No, up in Salem. I used to teach. I planned enough ‘government trips’ to last a few lifetimes.”

I could’ve sworn I heard him mutter a few “cool” s under his breath before he spoke up again, “It was nice getting to talk with you, but I kinda have some other patients I gotta check up on.” he moved by Fury, a “sir” slipping out as he passed and a little wave to me as he left.

The four who accompanied me in the elevator looked at each other, all but Tony practically questioning if this was normal for me.

The director cleared his throat, calling my attention back over to him, "When can you start?"

"Oh! Any time. I was only wondering how badly he was hurt so I can give you my best estimation for how long it'll take me to finish this."

“Will this not be a one-time excursion?”

“...No? Not likely.”

I was done with conversing, done with this nonsense. Placing my hand on the captain’s chest the area where we touched began to glow with a golden hue- I’d always been told my eyes did the same. It was unlike healing Tony a year ago- I didn’t have to rush, it wasn’t life or death- I could take my time and triage.

His biggest issue was hypothermia, unsurprisingly. I felt the cold move through his body to mine. A deep chill settled in my bones.

I pulled away, “Do you know if there’s a heating pad somewhere? Or something like it?” I hadn’t looked at them, afraid of how they would react. A few seconds of silence passed before I turned to them- Tony looked confused, maybe he didn’t see what my powers looked like, and he probably had some blood loss going on at the time; Fury stood unwavering with the smallest tent in his brow, but then again who could read him; the male agent who’d gone with us was standing, mouth slightly agape; and the female agent was gone slipped out without a sound- weird.

She looked like she’d be the ‘hard-ass’ type despite her being, what, 5’3”-5’4”. She was maybe Tony’s age, though it was difficult to tell, her seemingly ageless golden skin a potential factor, Tony’s substance abuse didn’t exactly help his cause though.

She walked back in, a wired heating pad in hand, she lifted it in the air inquisitively before tossing it to me.

“Thank you, Agent-”

“It’s no problem.” She cut me off gruffly.

I set the heating pad up in a chair and sat down, placing my hand back on the captain, and, over a few hours, I healed him as much as I could before returning to the hotel for the night. A comfortable cycle that lasted for a few months.

I walked into S.H.I.E.L.D.’s office for what would likely be the last time, at least soon.

I walked up to the agents who had escorted me on my first day- Agents May and Coulson I’d learned.

“Ready for your last day?” Coulson asked a melancholic tone laced his voice.

“Are you excited to be done with babysitting me?” I teased.

I’d gotten more comfortable around Coulson, though it wasn’t exactly difficult with his rather ‘easy-going’ nature, and comfortable enough around Agent May to talk to her. We walked along the rather familiar path to Captain Rogers’ room. I made quick work of healing what remained of his injuries.

He still wasn’t awake. For whatever reason I thought Cap would wake up when I had finished healing him.

Coulson and I talked for a while before heading to the entrance once I’d gotten word back from Tony that his chauffeur was there to pick me up.

“I’m gonna miss you, kid.” he whispered, pulling me into a side hug.

“I’ll miss you too, Phil.” I replied, “ It was nice getting to know you, Agent-”

“May, call me May.” She cut me off, “And, unless you quit within the next year we’ll probably see you soon. Stark has an odd habit of getting in trouble with almost anyone and everyone.”

“I’ll miss you too.”

A car horn was blaring outside for a minute and I knew it was Tony, “Guess that’s my cue, goodbye.” I sent them a soft smile and a wave before I got in the car.

A few months passed by with ease with the Stark Expo taking up more time and paperwork than I could’ve imagined. I walked in one day to see Coulson in Tony’s office.

“Phil? Oh my gosh, it’s so good to see you! What’s got you across the country?”

“It’s good to see you too, kid. I’m here because S.H.I.E.L.D. is requesting Mr. Stark’s presence.” He spoke rather cooly about Tony, a stark contrast to his normal.

“TONY! Did you break the Geneva Convention?!” Tony looked at me speechless, feigning hurt I would even think of it, Coulson stood beside me struggling and barely holding back a chuckle.

“No, unfortunately not. ‘We’ need to borrow him, more specifically the ‘Iron Man’ suit. As I was saying before, we have a helicarrier waiting for your arrival.”

“Okay, Tony. Please, stop being a bitch and get your shit. You’re lucky they step in enough to keep you out of prison for some likely war criminal activity. Suck it up and grab your bags.” I walked to Tony’s desk and put down his coffee before walking into my office and grabbing the duffel I had stuffed in the corner of the room.

I walked back out, “Where’d you say the plane was?”

Coulson showed me to the plane where we waited for about twenty minutes before Tony walked over with his bags. We piled in and got up to the helicarrier, a giant airbase I was told was legal.

May was waiting for us on deck and showed me to my room before leaving me to unpack.

I had to have been walking through those damn near identical hallways for half an hour before giving up.

After yelling into my hands I spoke, to no one but myself, “How do people even get around these things? It’s a whole death trap, I swear.”

“Exactly!” A voice called out from behind me. I turned around to find a familiar face, Captain America, “I guess you don’t work here either?”

“Oh, um, no. You couldn’t pay me to stay on this thing.”

He laughed revealing a warm smile that fit his beautiful, angel-like face perfectly.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Steve Rogers.”

“Kyrie Eirsson- I’m Mr. Stark’s personal assistant.”

I saw his eyes widen in recognition at the second half, “Oh! You’re the person I’m supposed to find.”

“What? Oh, fuck, that’s embarrassing.” I held my face in my hands, my face flushing furiously, I moved my fingers to see the Captain’s face. He stood across from me, face turned away, fist in front of his mouth in a failing attempt to hide his wide grin.

“In any case, Stark’s having a fit without you on the bridge. Shall we?” He held out his arm for me to take.

“I disappear for what, forty-fifty minutes and he goes nuts without me, shocker.” I took his arm gleefully, laughing at how ridiculous the situation was.

#steve rodgers x reader #steve rogers x reader #captain steve rogers #captain america #captain america x reader #mcu #mcu fanfiction #xmen x reader #xmen #fanfic #phil coulson #melinda may #director fury #nick fury #tony stark #iron man

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silvyslayer42 · 9 months ago

Text

how i think some character’s thoughts react to seeing kuriko:

toritsuka : immediately attracted to her and only a little bit because she looks like saiki

‘wow. that chicks kinda cute, huh? she looks around my age, too. maybe i should- actually, no that would probably go badly. … oh fuck? she’s looking over here. we’re making eye contact. her eyes are so pretty- and her expression is so scary oh my god??? what kind of spiritual aura even is that? it’s like she’s staring into my soul… did i piss her off somehow? you know what, i’ll leave, i’m just gonna get out of here. that girl is pretty cute but totally terrifying…’

aiura : immediately clocked her as saiki lol.

‘heh? isn’t this kusuo’s aura? so he’s here in the same place as me then (fate? yeah, definitely fate), but where..? oh, there he is! . eh? is that-? why does he look like a girl now? … so even kusuo has that kind of hobby… you look great by the way, babe!’

kokomi : gay

‘ah, this is a surprise! that is kuriko-chan, isn’t it? that means she’s back in japan now, then? i should probably go say hi to her, she was lovely to meet back at the cafe after all, and a perfect girl always greets her friends and acquaintances with a smile~! speaking of lovely… kuriko chan does look just as charming as ever. that constantly aloof face is really as cute on her as it is on her older brother, i could almost offu for her myself, haha. im getting sidetracked, anyways. … what exactly should i say to her? would just “hello” suffice? maybe a more substantial greeting would be better?—‘

akechi : gay

‘hmmm. well, objectively speaking that girl is quite pretty isn’t she? for starters her hair is a very nice shade of pink and it looks so nicely styled too while still managing the “effortless” look well enough that if i didn’t know better about hair styling i’d say she didn’t do anything special to it at all and her eyes are such a deep shade of violet too and they really remind me of saiki-kun’s in that way. speaking of saiki-kun he and this girl do look sort of similar now that i put my attention on it. maybe it’s because i have seen saiki-kun’s eyes before too even if it was only for a moment and know that they’re a similar color or maybe it’s just that perpetual pout that they both wear.. regardless this girl is really very attractive, i guess if i did have a type it would be girls like her with defined jaws and soft looking skin however this is all immaterial considering i can only really have eyes for—‘

#and thus toritsuka learned to fear women #/j he never learns anything #everyone is in love with saiki #saiki k #toritsuka reita #aiura mikoto #akechi touma #teruhashi kokomi #saiki kusuo #saiki kuriko #terusai #saikechi #torisai #<- kinda? not much more than canon #mikosai #lol

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ctimenefic · 14 days ago

Note

Just another anon popping in to say that gr63 gets rule 63’d AU is a borderline religious revelation to me 😵‍💫😳 ur a genius

This snippet does not have George in it, blessed anon, but it does, crucially, have tiny baby Lance Stroll

“You should hear what the British guys have to say about her,” Kieran Rivers is saying, as Alex makes his way back to the group from the hotel bar. There’s about a dozen of them, sprawled around four tables they dragged together, blithely ignoring the glares from the barstaff. It’s not like it’s a nice hotel, and they’re all guests, and some of them just won the Eurocup Formula 2.0 championship, actually, so who gives a shit if they’re loud and young. At least they’re drinking.

And talking about George, of course. She’s yet to join them - thanks to his sisters, Alex has better insights than most into the dark rituals of girls getting ready, and he reckons it’ll be another half hour - but it’s pretty obvious why she’d be the subject of conversation.

Winning as a wildcard. It’s mad. It’s brilliant. He’s so fucking proud.

“The F4?” he asks, sliding back into his seat. “She’s smashing it.”

Three of the boys at the far end of the table snort. Boys- men, technically. Most of them. There’s a couple of prodigies, like George, racing as well as any of them at sixteen. Alex doesn’t feel grown up. Ordering a beer without worrying someone will spot the dodgy photoshop on his licence still feels novel.

Jez Valdo grins too widely for a guy who binned it into the wall at what is technically his home race. “Smashing is one way of putting it.”

“More like they’re the ones smashing it,” Rivers chimes in, and Alex frowns. It’ll be close, sure, but if George drives as well as she did today, the championship’s in the bag. Rivers starts counting off names on his fingers: Braithwaite, Carter, Jones, and that doesn’t make any sense, because they’re nowhere near the top of the standings-

“It’s like they’ve worked out a system to stop her getting clingy, it’s genius. Wish I’d known after Moscow, I’d’ve lined one of you guys up to take her off my hands when she got all mopey.”

The group around Rivers laughs again. Something cold steals up Alex’s spine. Moscow hadn’t been great for George. He’d got third on the Sunday but still had to coax her out, and she’d vanished off back to the hotel after only an hour or so.

He places the image of George on the plane home, swamped in her giant Lewis Hamilton hoodie, next to Rivers’ face now, his lips pulled back in a smirk that shows his incisors. “No, really, she’s kinda tame but, you know, easy for it.”

“Eh,” Jez Valdo is saying, and it’s like slow motion, the way Alex can see it coming, a shit comment as obvious as debris on the track, “she’s not hot enough to take your sloppy seconds.”

Alex’s end of the table is silent. When he looks up, Lance Stroll is staring him dead in the eye. Alex isn’t even sure why Lance is here - he’s not raced in Eurocup, he’s doing F4 in Italy this year. But his dad owns half the boys at the table, so Stroll Jr must go where he wants.

It doesn’t matter - the point is, Alex meets his eyes, huddled under stormcloud brows, and has a single moment of pure, instinctive connection. He and Lance Stroll are as one for this bright, shining moment of their shared existence. It’ll never happen again; it’s a miracle it happens once. But as Alex’s grip on his pint turns white-knuckled, and he slides his glass to soak Valdo’s fucking stupid face, Lance knocks his wrist casually against River’s stein and sends it over the pair of them.

“Oh,” Lance says, flatly. “My bad.”

#gr63 gets rule 63'd #answered asks #lance stroll's first non-villain appearance in my wips #(I love him really I have a whole wip where he SEDUCES a RAKE with his FINE EYES)#anyway here he's a bro and respects women!!#(alex you could learn some things)#(wait no that's what the fic is for)#my fic #wip

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guzmabuglord · 4 months ago

Text

Think it’s bout time I introduce myself proper, eh?

okay. yo. I’m Guzma, hence the username. He/him pronouns 💯. I’m the strongest fuckin trainer in Alola and my favorite thing to do is beating down PUNKS with my dope-ass crew, Team Skull. Bug is the best type of pokemon, so i’ll prolly comment on your bug types if you got any of your own. (and you SHOULD.) You got any complaints about any of that, you talk to ME. also, i’ll try to update this if there’s ever anythin to add.

That’s all there is to say about me. Here’s a little bout my pokemon. None of em have names, but since ‘parently it’s common round here I might give em some eventually.

Golisopod’s my main man. my ace. been with me since I was a snot nosed punk myself. don’t play favorites with my guys but he’d be my favorite if I did. He’s real scary to other people but he’s chill when he ain’t battling.

Scizor’s always full of energy, which is real nice considerin how I found him. Don’t really know what happened with him, but he’s gotta lot of sun bleaching and scratches on his exoskeleton. He’s a lot smaller than most Scizor, but he thinks he’s smaller and lighter than he is so he likes to lay on me.

Masquerain’s an odd one. started followin me one day and didn’t stop till I offered them a pokeball. Flies faster upside down, which is hella weird. I wake up to them starin me down sometimes?? Pals with my Ariados.

Pincir’s prolly my smartest. mold breaker’s damn useful on him and he likes it when it trips up people we’re fightin. Real menace. Helps me with sudoku sometimes which is kinda fuckin scary.

Vikavolt’s protective and real good at trackin folks down and gettin me places. He never forgets a face or a place, so he’s my livin map. He likes bein scratched on the outside of his mandibles.

Ariados is real stocky and level headed, so he balances Masquerain out. His old trainer was real fuckin nasty to him so I beat him down and he gave me Ariados. he’s still kinda independent and makes his own webs to sleep in sometimes.

Joltik’s not one I bring out to battle, but I found her with Vikavolt. think they’re family so I had to get em both. she’s real sweet and I spend time with her sometimes when it’s real late and I can’t sleep. Gives me static electricity shocks by accident sometimes.

Venipede’s pretty new. got it on here a few weeks back from my pal Dashy. ‘pparently some bad guys dumped it at zeir gym door, so i’m tryna help it feel better for the time being. It’s real fast, and it goes for walks with me and Golisopod. Thinkin it might evolve sometime, so tryna prepare for that.

Just got a Nymble egg in the mail, so i’ll prolly be gettin one of those soon enough. Real hyped for it!

speakin of. If it’s needed, send any bug types needin care my way. Got plenty of space.

…One more thing. I’m the BEST fuckin bug type trainer out there, dammit. Remember that.

((OOC INFO UNDER THE CUT!))

hi!! 👋 welcome to my guzma rp blog. this is mostly me just having a little fun with this guy i care about a lot <3 here are some notes though!

- ANON HATE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED! i am fine with people sending “mean” stuff to guzma for whatever reasons they have as he is a gang boss… but there’s obviously a clear line between that and genuine ooc hate. if you’re worried abt me misinterpreting you feel free to add a note or anything!! :3

- this blog is meant to be guzma experiencing tumblr/rotomblr as an application! so i won’t be doing “traditional” roleplay from this guy, sorry :[

- mod is a minor! don’t send 18+ stuff please. (mod is he/him)

- INTERACT!!! interact with anything and everything that isn’t listed as a no-no above!! i LOVE talking to you guys and responding to your asks!!

thanks for reading :3! have a bugterful day

#rotomblr #unreality #pokeblogging #pkmn irl #guzma rp #intro post #pinned post #pinned info #pokemon rp #pokemon irl

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aardvaark · 2 months ago

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the librarians "and the drowned book" (s2e1) watch through:

excited to start season 2!!

sherlock holmes, huh? are we making him/the stories real then? murder mystery ep?

library’s malfunctioning.

love that baird is just hanging out in the boat while flynn pulls her along.

baird & flynn always seem to move around each other like in a dance.

aw cassie kissed jenkins on the cheek, someone cares

lmao flynn told baird to wear her best jumpsuit presumably because she was wearing one when he said that, but she really is wearing a jumpsuit. im resenting every school dance that said jumpsuits were not formal enough, even if they were particularly nice ones. girls’ school rules - dresses only, even when it was a grade 7 mixer or whatever lol.

also baird is seriously stunning here!

earrings with a name, that’s gonna be important, right? all i know is occhi = eyes

sherlock guy’s here?

hm the storms like. talking. that’s never good

is there kinda a jacob/cassandra ship starting? feels like they’re slowly building towards that.

hmmm sherlock just admitting he’s sherlock? he seems wayyyy too dodgy. yeah nah

MMMM moriarty! guy who killed sherlock holmes… kind of

"does one of you dance through the lasers now" parker would! actually there’s been so many leverage references/related stuff in this show but particularly in this episode.

HAHAHAH the guys have once again been outdone by cassandra. she gets all the ladies.

ohhh yeah that guy (who turns out to be prospero) seemed oddly involved!! always introduce ur villain in the first act etc etc.

"my rebirth" funny, that boat at the start was called renée, ie "reborn". wondered if that was chosen for a reason.

we’re in NY, of course we gotta visit the statue of liberty

"eh, im always a little ticked off" love you eve

#the librarians #and the drowned book #librarians watch through #wren speaks

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ramrage · 10 months ago

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ghost’s ghost

chapter 1: origin story (feat. date night!)

work rating: T

chapter rating: T

relationship: John “Soap” MacTavish x Simon “Ghost” Riley”

characters: John “Soap” MacTavish, Simon “Ghost” Riley”, Kyle “Gaz” Garrick cameo, John Price cameo

tags: Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Body Horror, Main Character Death, Not Really Character Death, Ghost John “Soap” MacTavish, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Crack, Dark Crack, Fluff, Eventual Smut, Character Turned Into a Ghost, Changing Tenses, Not (always) chronological,

summary:

Johnny broke the silence first, laughing, “Okay, this is unspeakably terrible but you gotta admit, it’s kinda funny.”

What?” Simon asked, aghast. His comms crackled with someone saying something important—not quite as important as this, though.

“You’re Ghost,” Johnny began, “and I’m a ghost. Get it?”

Simon groaned though he actually wanted to cry. It was weird. Obviously.

Johnny is KIA which sucks, but it sucks a bit less because he never really… leaves? Here are some vignettes of Ghost and ghostly Soap.

part 2

part 3

part 4

part 5

ao3 link

Johnny is KIA which sucks, obviously, but it sucks a bit less because he never really… leaves?

They discovered it moments after he bled out, Simon still hunched over his body, frantically, futilely performing chest compressions.

“Watch your six!”

Simon jolted, twisted, and landed two shots in the face of the approaching x-ray before stilling. “What the hell?” That was Johnny’s voice. Was he still…? Simon, hopeful, hazarded another look at Soap’s body. It was unchanged—pale and bloodied and most certainly still dead.

“Bleeding’ fucken Jesus…” Johnny’s voice cut through the din of chaos again, but it came from several meters away from where his body was cooling on the ground.

His boyfriend—whatever the fuck he was—was dead, and now he’s hallucinating. Class.

“Simon, fucken look at me, dammit.”

Simon obeyed, and sure enough, there he was: John Fucking Mactavish. In the flesh.

“Bloody hell, Johnny,” Simon gasped, running to meet him, to fall into his outstretched arms. The pieces didn’t fit together, but relief overshadowed logic. It clarified somewhat the steps taken between point A to B, becoming clearer yet when Simon all but phased through his lover’s body

Sprawled on the ground where he fell, Simon’s wide eyes met Johnny’s wide eyes, both men completely, utterly flabbergasted.

Johnny broke the silence first, laughing, “Okay, this is unspeakably terrible but you gotta admit, it’s kinda funny.”

“What?” Simon asked, aghast. His comms crackled with someone saying something important—not quite as important as this, though.

“You’re Ghost,” Johnny began, “and I’m a ghost . Get it?”

Simon groaned though he actually wanted to cry. It was weird. Obviously.

“Don’t worry yer pretty head, I’ll explain it later. First, get your arse out of here alive, ” Johnny said in a rushed sort of way, as if his life was still on the line. He checked over his shoulder. “Now would be nice.”

So Simon did.

The rest, they say, is history.

———————————————

Now, several months later, they are indulging in a much-needed date night. Date nights are often called much-needed, be it as an excuse for getting a little quality time, stress relief, or simply an effort to keep the romance alive. Such concerns are all the more salient for soldiers, especially when only one of the two is alive.

For obvious reasons, the activities requiring more action tend to be a bust. Take for example last month’s arcade excursion. Who would’ve known it’s hard to play pinball when you can’t fucking touch things? As such, dinner dates prove to be a favorite. They’re a pleasant play at normalcy, and as a bonus, they’re an excuse to try out new restaurants.

This week is Johnny’s choice—a swanky little establishment with romantic lighting and an extensive cocktail menu. Johnny haunts Simon’s shoulder as they enter, looking rather pleased with the overall ambiance.

His question of “Not too shabby, eh,?” doesn’t receive a verbal response, but Simon flashes a subtle smile and its answer enough, all things considered.

That is, Simon can’t exactly say “not at all” without the hostess thinking he’s lost his fucking mind. Obviously, such an outcome isn’t exactly “ideal” in the strictest sense of the word. A smile, however, can pass as a greeting, and apparently it does. Public communication is a game of double-meanings these days.

“Just yourself?” the hostess asks the big scary man in front of her.

“Yeah,” Simon nods, “and my stupid ghost boyfriend.”

He keeps that second part to himself. If she thinks the solo-diner is odd, she doesn’t show it. In fact, she remarks that it’s all “grand” before leading him to an open table.

Along the way, Johnny sends a conspiratorial look. “She got something against Scots? Didn’t even look at me”. He makes this joke every damn time they go out, unchanging in its delivery dripping in mock-offense.

Simon shoots him a sharp “shut the fuck up” glare, same as always, and lets Johnny take the far seat, also same as always. Simon isn’t overly fond of having his back to the door, but he levies that risk against the risk of seeming insane for chatting with an empty seat. All relationships involve a bit of give and take.

The hostess isn’t yet out of earshot when Johnny leans in with a mischievous grin. “You’re looking good, Si. Real good. In fact, so good I’d take you over this table, right here, right now.”

Simon rolls his eyes. “You can’t. Twat.”

“A man can dream, no?” Johnny settles with a shrug. He watches fondly as Simon scans the menu, his lovely little eyes trailing from left to right, left to right. What a human thing to do. What a not-human thing to admire.

It’s not even like he can’t read anymore—he can. It’s just hard to find purpose in it when the only way he can apply it to the world is through a tall, blond proxy.

“I mean it, though. You’re the most gorgeous thing I ever did see.”

Simon blushes for the dead man. It’s funny. Johnny was never quite as forthcoming with the compliments when he was alive. His reasoning was that he was afraid of the openness, afraid of any negative reaction his flirtations would get him. He doesn’t give much of a shit anymore. Dying really puts things in perspective.

Simon looks up from the menu with a shy, fond smile. “Anything stand out to you?”

“You” Johnny responds with a wink, “but if you’re talking about what’s on the menu, hm. Can’t say no to some lamb but…” he trails off and pulls a face, “the hell are fondant potatoes”

“Fondant potatoes?” Simon parrots before scanning the menu with a light frown. “No fucking clue. Sounds pretentious as shit.”

“I’m saying!”

“Fondant potatoes...” he mutters. A few more moments pass and Simon finally shakes his head with an exasperated sigh. “This whole bloody menu is pretentious, Johnny. You won't do much better than fondant potatoes .”

“Lamb with the pretentious potatoes then,” Johnny says after a bit of hemming and hawing. “Sacrifice them real nice for me, eh, baby?”

“I always do.”

It’s true enough, if only because of the all-or-nothing nature of sacrificing, a process Simon has well worked out since they discovered it.

According to legend, Simon was drinking his sorrows one sad night when Johnny nodded to his beer and requested Simon—verbatim— “pour one out for the homie.”

Simon, not particularly amused, grumbled “for the homie” and wailed the bottle across the room. Just as it exploded into a shower of glass and stout, another similarly half-drunk bottle appeared on the table.

They didn’t notice it at first. Johnny was too busy chewing Simon out and Simon was too busy getting chewed out. It was in the silence afterwards when Simon, looking for a sip of relief, reached for the bottle with swaying hands and startled as his hand passed straight through the bottle, as if it wasn’t even there.

“The hell?”

Johnny glanced over just as Simon’s fingertips emerged from the glass. Half-awed with a half-baked conclusion already in mind, he muttered, “no bleeding way,” and repeated this phrase over and over as he tentatively reached for the bottle to test his hypothesis. To his surprise and delight, it toppled at the touch of a finger.

He was beaming when he looked Simon’s way. “Bleeding fucking Jesus. You did it.”

They found through experimentation that successful sacrifices require two things: destruction and intention. Pouring one out—complete destruction—for the homies—intention.

Both are necessary, and as an interesting and limiting caveat, the sacrifice has to be rendered completely useless in one world to transfer to the other.

In other words, when Simon asks the server for two orders of lamb with fondant potatoes—one for here, one takeaway—he does so with the intention of flushing the latter down the toilet. The wine is a different story.

“Cabernet or pinot noir,” Simon hums in feigned contemplation. In reality, he’s waiting for Johnny to stop cooing about “how sexy he sounds speaking French” and spit out a fucking answer. Luckily, the mask does a great job of hiding his annoyance and blush.

“Pinot noir,” Johnny decides with a nod.

“Pinot noir,” Simon repeats.

Johnny groans indulgently as the server pens the order into her notepad, but is merciful enough to wait for her to leave before saying, “y’know, I only got the pinot because you say it so sexy, and I just needed to hear it again.”

“You’re fucking insufferable,” Simon responds, utterly devoted to suffering Johnny for as long as fortune would let him. He keeps that to himself, though. No need to tell the world that water is wet.

Case in point, Johnny’s chin rests easy in his palm, turning his fond smile smushed and insufferably sweeter for it. Death filed away at his rough edges somehow, left him soft. Simon, too.

They shoot the shit over the empty table, basking in normalcy they don’t deserve, and let the conversation take a raunchy turn. As if they’d be able to act on half the things they discuss.

The server returns at a decidedly inopportune moment but bless Simon’s poker face, she has no idea her customer is hearing the tail end of a particularly foul fantasy, courtesy of his unseen companion.

“Call me crazy, Johnny,” Simon whispers once the server leaves, “but it seems like you save the nastiest shit for when we have an audience.”

Johnny doesn’t even hesitate. “Aye, I do. Very intentionally.”

“Well, interested in continuing your little story?” Simon asks with raised brows. He idly spins the wine around the glass.

“I’m more interested in trying that cabernet.”

“Pinot noir,” Simon corrects.

“Ooh, baby ,” Johnny croons, and Simon swears when he realizes his mistake, swearing even more as Johnny gloats his victory. Unable to react in any meaningful way without looking insane, Simon instead opts to glare Johnny down, and he continues until Johnny gets his fill of gloating and turns his attention back to the wine. “Come on now. Give us a taste?”

Simon raises a brow. “With that attitude?”

“I’ll let you call it a cabernet,” Johnny barters. Simon lets him squirm. “Or even pin-not no-were .”

“Beg for it,” Simon dares, donning a shit-eating grin while he waits expectantly.

Johnny rolls his eyes. “Please can I have some pin-not no-were .”

“Try again. Say it sexy this time.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Johnny groans, “can I pretty please have the pee-no nwahr ?”

That seems to do the trick and with a satisfied, obnoxious smirk, Simon bats the glass to the floor. “Cheers, love.”

part 2

#ghost’s ghost #my writing #mine #ghost x soap #ghostsoap #soapghost #soap x ghost #ghoap #simon riley #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #soap mactavish #john soap mactavish x simon ghost riley #simon riley x john mactavish #simon ghost riley x john soap mactavish #simon riley x soap mactavish #the woes of covering all the tag permutations for your ship #when both characters in question have aliases

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