#they ultimately both grew into their best selves because of each other

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

No but this is LITERALLY Eli and Demetri throughout most of the show ;______;

like, the most compelling ships for me always stem out of one thing: the characters have a profound, ongoing effect on each other’s senses of selves. when they are apart, the characters’ actions are still affected by each other. the way they approach the world changes because of the other. 

which is this deeply Austenian view of ideal romantic relationships as mechanisms by which we come to know ourselves better and become better versions of ourselves. good romance, for me, is always tied in with a sense of self-actualization, and the way in which a beloved partner allows a person to know themselves better.

[thedaveandkimmershow]

It takes an excessive amount of self-confidence to say "I Do", to mean it, and then to assume it's a done deal. BAM. There's your Forever.

Of course we were young, we were in the throes of young love, and seriously. What more did we need?

So I said "I do", she said "I do" and then.

All hell broke loose.

Much like that book "What To Expect When You're Expecting" there's a metric ton of stuff you're not led to expect when you're teeing up a marriage. For sure there's what you do expect. For sure there's stuff we shoulda expected. And absolutely, uncategorically, without apology, there's stuff that in no way should we have expected.

There's stuff that should not have happened.

And then thirty one years later, here we still are. We definitely bent along the way... but we did not break.

We did not.

Break.

Believe it or not, we were asked as recently as last night by our bartender how you do that. How you last thirty-one years. And in a nod to both the romantics and realists out there, the answer I'm leaning toward is that from Day 1 ( if not sooner) you're actively crafting yourselves into individuals who really are meant for each other. The idea that we were both perfect and perfect for each other as twenty-somethings is simply naive. There's so much growing up as individuals, so much growing you do and continue to do as you gain experience and knowledge.

We are not now, for example, who we were when each of us said "I do". Those versions of us are now preserved in time capsules stashed away in our memories, our writings, our videos, and our photographs.

We were, obviously to each other, within the same ballpark as human beings. We were both creatives. Both photographers. Both writers. Both passionate about our careers. We both shared some of the same habits, humor, and intellectual interests. We had projects that overlapped and friends who overlapped. We had a common view of the world along with opposing views of the world that we declined to make deal-breakers. We had young love, laughter, fun, and chemistry.

And then yeah. In retrospect, even though I don't think this was something we did intentionally, we crafted ourselves into individuals who really are meant for each other and who really can prevail against Time and Circumstance and heinous Plot Twists.

So much of life is having to make The Call without all the information you need. Definitely parts of life spring surprises on you as a couple that are treacherous and breathtaking. You have to learn how to navigate both profound ambiguity and massive emotional turmoil.

Together.

You have to do that together.

And whoever we started out as, each of us, we grew through several iterations of ourselves leading to who we are today. And each of those iterations of Me, each of those iterations of Her, were sufficient to prevail against what we had to prevail against at the times we had to prevail against those things.

Even so, the experiences themselves were brutally messy. The most important thing, though, is that we bent.

But we did not break.

I won't lie. Marriage is the ultimate test of character. There are so many personal and professional abilities you're required to put in play even though you don't have all those abilities when you say "I do" and she says "I do". There's so much you have to improvise, learn on the fly. There's an Everest of things you learn about each other and what you do with that knowledge is the difference between success and failure. Between something you endure and a Life you cherish. Between being stuck and growing up.

Into your best self.

Into your best selves.

Which didn't just happen, by the way.

I know because for thirty-one years she has challenged me and continues to challenge me to be my best self. I did not and do not go quietly into that best self but it's a helluva thing I ended up pursuing that version of Me anyway.

So.

It takes an excessive amount of self-confidence to say "I Do", to mean it, and then to assume it's a done deal. BAM. There's your Forever.

But there you are: we're thirty-one years into this adventure and we are well on our way to Forever.

☺️

[thosch3i]

The finale of Ultimate Note airs 12/9 (tonight in China) for VIP. Thank you to this drama for bringing me my favorite Iron Triangle ❤ Longer discussion of why I love it so much, and why I strongly recommend it to book fans (especially those upset with certain previous adaptations) below the cut, apologies if it’s not fully coherent at times because I haven’t slept enough and also it’s almost 1am. But your TLDR is basically: characterization, plot, pacing, relationships are the best of any DMBJ drama. Iron Triangle especially.

First, the pacing of this show is excellent. Pretty much all cdramas I’ve seen or heard of have been inundated with filler, and the previous DMBJ dramas fall victim to this as well. Ultimate Note took 36 episodes to cover 4 book arcs, whereas previous adaptations have taken more episodes to cover far fewer. There’s really not any content you’d be wanting to skip, as almost all of it is plot-relevant or character-relevant.

Second, the plot is the most cohesive out of any DMBJ adaptation. Frankly, this isn’t saying too much, given the novel plot can also be confusing as all hell sometimes, but Ultimate Note goes above and beyond in pulling in information from later books and, if I heard correctly, common fan theories, doing their best to fill in the plot holes left by the author to create a more complete story.

Third, the female characters are actually done well. (As well as they can be, given the source material’s unfortunate habit of fridging its women.) For example, A-Ning’s decision to go the Tamutuo wasn’t because she was ~in love~ with some man. She is a determined individual who has made her choice about her path a long time ago, and she is willing to risk death to achieve her goals. Even her death was done about as well as it could have been--it wasn’t drawn out to the point of it being sickeningly cheesy, and Wu Xie tried his best to honor her goals and bring her to the Palace of the Queen Mother of the West (even emphasizing to Pangzi, “if you died, I would carry you too”). In addition, Chen Wenjin wasn’t stuck in some ridiculous love triangle. She loved Wu Sanxing, of course, but her loving a man isn’t made out to be her entire personality. Her goodbye to Xie Lianhuan is poignant but not mushy. She’s steady and sure in her goals, and she knows what she has to do in order to save herself. Yuncai’s character, as well, I think was handled about as well as it could’ve been given the source material. Her relationship with Pangzi wasn’t overexaggerated and nauseating, and I think their relationship was more tolerable in the drama than it was in the novel overall. (In addition, I prefer how they handled her death in the drama versus the novel--instead of just killing her offscreen, they give her a redemption, and show how she’d grown attached to her new friends, Pangzi especially, resulting in her hesitation to deal the final blow.)

Related to the above point: no added forced romances that destroyed the female characters’ personalities and reduced them to just love interests for men, thank god. Pangzi and Yuncai’s relationship was already there in the novel, but nothing about their relationship was distorted in the drama to the point of being annoying, and Yuncai is shown to have her own goals for cozying up to Pangzi (at first, at least). If you want to get technical about “added romances”, you could honestly argue that it’s Pingxie. (And Hei///hua, but I’ll be honest and say they’re not my cup of tea, so I won’t really be discussing them. However, I do think their characters, while also exaggerated for humor at points, were also done well, and their relationship--while AFAIK was not a really a thing in the books at all?--was written in a way that the development made sense, and their personalities compatible.)

But anyway, while Ultimate Note does make Pingxie seem closer to each other than they were in the novel, we do have to remember that the novel is from Wu Xie’s point of view, and he’s a little bit of a blockhead when it comes to noticing how much Xiaoge cares about him. (IIRC, he wonders if Xiaoge even considers him a friend in Zang Hai Hua...after Xiaoge’s literally called him his “only connection” to this world in book 8.) However, from an outsider POV, it’d be natural for us to see Xiaoge worrying more over Wu Xie. Because from Wu Xie’s perspective, what did he actually see? Xiaoge dropping in to save him a few times and often vanishing or turning away right after, leaving Wu Xie with mixed feelings and confusion about his value to Xiaoge. Xiaoge being aloof before they set off to Tamutuo, claiming that he is a person with no past and future, and that no one would remember him if he disappeared. (Xiaoge smiles before telling Wu Xie that he’s on Wu Xie’s side--that’s a smile that the viewers see, but that Wu Xie doesn’t.) Most of Xiaoge’s visible worry for Wu Xie in the desert was also when Wu Xie himself was not there to see it. During the scene where the fungus was growing in Wu Xie’s stomach, he was entirely out of it while Xiaoge visibly panicked about hurting him, and after the fungus was dealt with, Xiaoge only stood off to the side--only to smile faintly to himself, relieved, after Wu Xie wakes up. (Again a smile that the viewers see, but that Wu Xie doesn’t.) But because from an outsider POV we can see all this, while Wu Xie remains partly ignorant, lines like “thankfully, I didn’t bring death upon you” and Xiaoge calling Wu Xie is only connection to the world seem that much more logical, now that we can see some of the depth and development of how much Xiaoge does care about Wu Xie.

That brings me to the primary reason why I love Ultimate Note, because the main selling point for me on any franchise is not actually world-building or plot, but rather the characters and the relationships between those characters. And for DMBJ, the relationship I’m always looking for--and the relationship that the entire franchise ultimately centers around--is the Iron Triangle. And the mutual trust and the strength of the bond between this Iron Triangle is unmistakable; no one is treated as expendable.

As much as we have joked about Xiaoge's double standards with Wu Xie versus Pangzi, the end of the Banai arc especially and the last five episodes have cemented the importance of Xiaoge and Pangzi's friendship. Their relationship is often the weakest leg of the Iron Triangle in DMBJ adaptations, but Ultimate Note has nailed it. Pangzi helps carry Xiaoge out of Tamutuo, and Pangzi's the one who primarily takes care of Xiaoge after he loses his memories. There's also Xiaoge's clear worry over Pangzi after Yuncai's death, and his assurance that Pangzi won't die as long as he is here in the later episodes when the two of them are separated from Wu Xie--showing that the Iron Triangle is a triangle; Wu Xie isn't the single connection that Xiaoge and Pangzi's relationship hinges upon.

Pangzi and Wu Xie's friendship doesn't need much explaining: the two of them bicker like they're brothers, and they could probably star in their own buddy-cop comedy together. Both Pangzi and Xiaoge are shown to be clearly worried for Wu Xie after the Xie Lianhuan reveal, and even though neither of them quite know how to handle it, they are there for Wu Xie. And of course, there's the scene where Pangzi pours out the water while they're waiting for Xiaoge to leave the meteorite. Wu Xie cries for Pangzi when they're in the Miluotuo cave and he chooses to carry out Xiaoge first, and once again, his worry for Pangzi after Yuncai's death is palpable. Even when Wu Xie has to leave Pangzi in Banai, he instructs Xiaoge to look after him (not that Xiaoge really needed the instruction, anyway--that’s his best friend, too).

Wu Xie and Xiaoge's relationship needs even less explaining: anyone who's watched the show can attest to how much they care about each other. From Wu Xie's frantic scrambling to grab the tapes upon hearing they were from "Zhang Qiling" and Xiaoge's introduction in the show being him stopping outside Wushanju to stare up (longingly?) at the sign, we see their relationship unfold in all of its quiet pining and lingering looks. When Xiaoge claims no one would know if he disappeared from this world, Wu Xie doesn't hesitate in promising that he, at least, will. Xiaoge smiles before telling Wu Xie that he's on his side, and Wu Xie vows to walk with Xiaoge until the very end. During the entire Tamutuo trip, Xiaoge is visibly worried for Wu Xie--when the parasitic fungus grew in his stomach, that worry was the most clear. But Wu Xie worries for Xiaoge too: insisting on going to save Xiaoge from the snakes that night when they all went blind; swearing that even if he faces death, he would wait for Xiaoge to leave the meteorite; telling Xiaoge that he will take him home. (Related: the soft, almost vulnerable way Xiaoge tells Wu Xie “take me home” in episode 31.) Not to mention--even when Xiaoge loses his memories, he still remembers Wu Xie. (And Pangzi smiles knowingly right after that scene.)

There are too many character/relationship moments I could write about, but one that stuck out in particular was when they were facing the spiders, and Wu Xie stopped Xiaoge from cutting his hand and using his blood to make the spiders retreat. At this point, Wu Xie and Pangzi don't know the extent of how Xiaoge was (mis)treated as a child (and used as a blood bag, apparently), but they know about how "A-Kun" was captured used as bait. Wu Xie and Pangzi would never ask Xiaoge to bleed for them, no matter what. Not now, let alone 10+ years later. (I won't name names, but if you know what I'm talking about, then you know.)

Which brings me to my main point: the characters in Ultimate Note are the closest to their novel selves I have ever seen in a DMBJ adaptation, and this is objectively the best adaptation of the DMBJ novel. (Whether you prefer another adaption or not is your opinion--I absolutely love the Time Raiders movie, even though that plot is literally all over the place, and Xiaoge is decently OOC--but Ultimate Note is the best adaptation of the novel, and the characters are the most true to what they actually should be.)

You can see the innocent and naïve Wu Xie, but you can also see the developing confusion, frustration, and anger he feels because he's been lead around by his nose his entire life. And he is angry in the novel; he is a bit of a hot-headed bastard; he's not just a naïve child. I remember seeing some complaints that Wu Xie felt "OOC" in the first episode for being so furious with his San-shu, but I think his reactions were spot-on with how he felt, and how he wanted to react. A similar point is the scene where Wu Xie slammed Xiaoge against the car--aside from just being some fun fanservice, in the novel Wu Xie really was furious at Xiaoge for vanishing on him and never contacting him after leaving the Heavenly Palace in the Clouds. A lot of the novel is Wu Xie's inner thoughts, which are difficult to portray in a live action adaptation, but he really did pretty much want to pick a fight with Xiaoge about disappearing, and  Ultimate Note decided on how to express this frustration in a way that suits a drama adaptation. In addition, you can see how Wu Xie’s past experiences like the trip to Tamutuo has changed him in how he manipulates Panma into bringing him to the lake; and you can see how almost losing Xiaoge and Pangzi to the Miluotuo changed him as well, when he thinks he’s lost them for real in episode 36 (leading up to his decision to put on his San-shu’s mask by the end, despite the fact that “some masks, when worn too long, can no longer be taken off”).

As for Pangzi: even though he has scenes that were clearly exaggerated for comic relief, he has plenty of moments that build his character and the Iron Triangle’s bond. These include him pouring out the water while he and Wu Xie are waiting for Xiaoge, his grief over Yuncai’s death, his standing by Wu Xie during the hotel auction scene, and his almost mother-hen-like worry about Xiaoge while they’re entering the Zhang Family Mansion in the last five episodes. Not to mention, he’s really quite a smart and perceptive character, despite his goofiness: he sees through Xiaoge’s worry about Wu Xie, and he knows when to step in and liven the atmosphere (see: Wu Xie being all awkward about his gift to Xiaoge in episode 31, and Pangzi being there practically just for emotional support). Also in episode 31: Pangzi telling Xiaoge that he’s getting more and more humane (the implications about Wu Xie here are pretty obvious). All in all, Pangzi is a funny person; he is often comic relief, but he’s also a steadfastly loyal friend and someone who loves deeply and without regret. Initially we saw more of his humor, but we definitely got the depths to his character by the end of Ultimate Note.

Finally Xiaoge, who I’m discussing last because he’s my favorite character: for once, I can see the humanity behind the title “Zhang Qiling”, and in a way that isn’t OOC. Xiaoge isn’t treated as a free source of bug-repelling blood; he isn’t treated as some overpowered, untouchable idol; he isn’t treated as a rescue machine for whenever another character needs it. He is a human, not a god. For the rest, I think his actor’s words speak for themselves. (And now I really don’t trust anyone else except him with Xiaoge's character.)

Ultimate Note succeeded in capturing the nuances of its main characters: Wu Xie’s loss of his “tianzhen” and slow maturation to the man he will eventually become by Sha Hai; Pangzi’s outwardly humorous pseudo-caricature but inwardly deeply loyal and loving spirit; Xiaoge’s vulnerabilities, painful humanity, and the “heart” given to him by his mother, hidden beneath a seemingly impenetrable armor. This is an Iron Triangle that feels like the Iron Triangle, without needing say so much in words. This is an Iron Triangle with mutual respect and a friendship I can see and believe in.

In conclusion: Ultimate Note does the story justice; it does the characters justice; it does the relationships justice; and it did all this with a low budget and almost no promotion. You can tell the crew definitely cares about the source material.

My only complaint is that they couldn’t film the finale.

Rambling over! All my love to the Ultimate Note cast and crew <3

[violethowler]

Symbolic Foreshadowing: Analyzing the KH1 Opening in the Context of the Heroine’s Journey

“But was it a dream, or a prophecy?” --Puck (Gargoyles; S2E43: Future Tense)

It’s generally widely acknowledged in fan spaces that the opening sequence of the original game, despite the fantastical visuals, foreshadows key elements of the game’s story, as well as the roles that Sora, Riku, and Kairi each play in the narrative and how their connections relate to one another. Riku standing in or under a giant wave with his hand reaching out for Sora is a clear visual connection to their separation as Destiny Islands falls that foreshadows his fall to darkness in the game itself. Meanwhile, Sora is separated from Kairi at the end of the opening just like how they are separated at the end of the game. 

But looking closely at the symbolism reveals even more layers of meaning hidden within the first Kingdom Hearts game’s opening, especially when the series’ adherence to the Heroine’s Journey is taken into account. 

We open with Sora having to shield his eyes from the blinding light of the sun before he looks to see Riku standing out in the water. The connection between Riku and the sun is reinforced in Chain of Memories, when his redemption is referred to as “The Road to Dawn,” referring to the sun rising at the end of the night to mark the beginning of a new day. This is made explicit when the original montage is recreated shot-for-shot in the opening tutorial of KH3, with a bright light in Riku’s place. 

Kairi, meanwhile is the opposite. Her appearance in the KH1 opening music video is accompanied by a sunset, a trend which repeats itself across the series. She and Sora talk on the dock at sunset the day before the trio plans to depart with their raft. She welcomes Sora home at sunset during the ending of Kingdom Hearts II. She and Sora share the paopu fruit in KH3 at sunset and the game ends with them saying goodbye before the sun sets. But it isn’t the sunset itself that Kairi is associated with. Rather, it’s the disappearance or absence of the sun. 

Her proper introduction in the original game is framed in shadows as she blocks Sora’s view of the sun on the beach. The illusion of her that Sora sees at Merlin’s House later in the game expresses a love of dark, musty places, comparing the Mystical House to the Secret Place on the island. Both are places with little or no sunlight, with the cave on Destiny Islands only having a small hole in the roof, while Traverse Town is always shown in endless night. And after her awakening in Hollow Bastion, she spends her time in Traverse Town at the Secret Waterway, even deeper underground than Merlin’s House. 

Kingdom Hearts III ends with the visual of Sora fading from his reality as the sun sets while the secret ending depicts him and Riku waking up in Quadratum, a place outside reality, at night. As a place outside of reality, Quadratum checks all the boxes for the Descent stage of the Heroine’s Journey. This phase of the narrative pattern marks the point at which the protagonist undergoes a period of self reflection in order to confront the parts of their psyche that they have thus far refused to consciously acknowledge. 

Riku’s presence and visual association with the sun is critical, because if Sora is about to undergo a “dark night of the soul,” then it makes perfect sense for the end of his Descent to be heralded by sunrise imagery. In Light Youth/Dark Youth stories and romantic Heroine’s Journeys, the protagonist and their Animus are typically separated from each other emotionally at the beginning of the story. The rift between the two keeps the main character from achieving inner balance and metaphorically keeps them both trapped in childhood by holding them back from maturing into their best, fullest selves. 

Falling into water or darkness in the Kingdom Hearts series is associated with physical and emotional separation, as well as the severing of bonds. So it makes sense then that the opening music video uses that imagery to illustrate that initial rift between them, as well as how that separation is quickly followed by the visual of Sora falling into the dark void surrounding the Dive to the Heart. 

On one level, this can be read as a metaphor for Sora’s Descent, where he is isolated from the people he cares about. But some recent developments over the last few years have given it another potential meaning that was probably not planned intentionally. 

One of Disney’s most recent properties to attempt the Heroine’s Journey was the Star Wars sequel trilogy, depicting Rey following the path of the Heroine’s Journey with Ben “Kylo Ren” Solo as her Animus. The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi followed the first two acts of the framework to the letter.

However the finale of the trilogy, Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker, completely abandons the Heroine's Journey formula, removing any sense of growth from Rey’s narrative and ultimately killing off her Animus. The film ends with her travelling alone to Tatooine, the literal starting point of the franchise, where she buries Luke and Leia’s lightsabers in the sand and takes the last name Skywalker for herself. Regardless of what fans who enjoyed the film may think about what the ending was meant to convey about how long she was going to stay on Tatooine, the last image that audiences have is the girl who grew up on a desert planet but wanted something more going back to a desert planet with no clear goal for the future. 

Coming of age narratives that break away from the structure of what the story is setting up leave the main character metaphorically trapped in childhood. These endings strip their personal arc of its momentum and leave the audience feeling as if the character has learned nothing and that their growth has stagnated or even regressed. At the end of the Rise of Skywalker, Rey slides down the sand dunes of the Lars homestead the same way she slid down the sand dunes on Jakku in The Force Awakens, dressed in light colors the way she was in the beginning when she was ignorant of what was going on out in the wider galaxy. The KH1 opening ends with Sora standing on a stained glass pillar depicting Snow White, the first Disney princess. 

While Disney movies are generally acknowledged as something that adults can enjoy, there is still a general attitude in western (or at least American) culture that Disney (and animation as a whole) is solely for children. Many Kingdom Hearts fans who want to see the series “grow up” are most often the ones who call for the series to drop the Disney elements entirely and become more like Final Fantasy. So even if the narrative of the story itself doesn’t say anything, the visuals of Disney are still associated with childhood by many. And that visual of Sora standing on a stained-glass depiction of the first Disney movie serves to connect Sora to that Disney aspect of the series.  

So the symbolism of the KH1 opening can be read as both subtle visual foreshadowing of the narrative pattern and a silent warning of how deviating from that pattern will fundamentally break the narrative. If the rift between the protagonist and the Animus is not properly healed, then it will ultimately leave Sora isolated from the people he cares about and trapped in childhood while everyone around him grows up. 

[dustedmagazine]

Ian Mathers’ 2020: We’re stuck inside our own machines

I’ve had a song I loved in high school and haven’t thought much about since stuck in my head. The song “Apparitions” by the Matthew Good Band is a fine example of the alt rock of the late 90s; if you grew up then but somewhere down in the states (or elsewhere) instead of my southern Ontario you may well have your regional equivalents, and like this one they may not resonate terribly strongly outside of their time and place. It popped back into my head after a long time recently and of course 2020 has changed it a little. A song that as a teen I felt keenly as about loneliness (albeit also about how technology can feed into that) of course now plays on my nerves as another small piece of art about the way that most of us (those scared and/or responsible anyway) have only that relatively narrow, technologically mediated connection to the people we love. All of us, artists and listeners alike, are trying to fit our feelings and art and selves down these little connections, with some success.

On a personal level, 2020 wound up being stressful in ways we couldn’t have predicted even after the pandemic hit. In circumstances that could have seen governments on this continent support those unable to work (and those who shouldn’t have to), support those workers who are truly essential, support workers and renters and even landlords and small businesses, instead we got a near-total abeyance of those governments using the resources we provide them with to save any of us. On a personal level my wife and I were lucky enough to be able to work from home (not that it didn’t come with its own forms of stress, and now that I’m off until January I have several work/stress-related illnesses to recover from) but still saw friends and loved ones lose good, used-to-be-sustainable livings overnight, saw family businesses succumb to a near-total absence of effective government support after months of trying to keep above water, etc.

It is probably no surprise that this is not a situation conducive to listening to music, let alone writing about it; I have deliberately and happily kept busy on behind the scenes stuff at Dusted that I could still manage but looking, at the end of the year, at the amount I managed to actually create is demoralizing if not at all shocking. I’m not sure I think next year will be ‘better’ in many important ways, although at our job there is a growing feeling among coworkers that next year has to have some work/life balance because 2020 was, maybe more than anything else, unsustainable.

That’s not to say I didn’t spend a lot of time and emotion on music this year, and if nothing else constant sleep deprivation, stress, and panic meant I was probably open to being deeply moved by all sorts of art even more than normally (it’s gotten to the point where I can’t even read a sad or moving twitter thread out loud to my wife without getting teary, which is kind of… nice?). Funnily enough the band that did the most to keep me sane didn’t really put out anything in 2020. Personal favorite, Low, instead started, in early April, getting on Instagram with something they called on whim “It’s Friday I’m in Low.” With one brief break they have now done by my count at least 35 shows (catalogued here, by the way), every Friday at about 4 my time.

Admittedly it’s easier for Low to pull this off than some bands, since the 2/3 of the trio that sing are a married couple (they’ve had a couple of socially-distanced backyard shows with bassist Steve Garrington, but he’s mostly been isolating elsewhere). These shows have seen the band’s Alan Sparhawk take a mid-set break to do follow-up phone interviews with the acts featured in the COVID-curtailed touring bands series Vansplainingthat they started on YouTube, or just to give a tour round their vegetable garden and talk tips. It’s seen Alan and Mimi Parker draw on their impressive, 25+ year body of work (averaging 4-5 songs a set, I don’t think they’ve repeated themselves yet) and talk a bit between songs about pandemics, politics, song choices, and whether Alan should grab his bike helmet this time.

They’re not the only musicians out there speaking love and sanity (and playing music) into the strange digital interzone filled with hate and disinformation where we’ve all been forced to gather while locked down, but they were and the most consistent and steady signal being emitted each week. No matter how tired I was from work or what new symptoms I’d developed or what horrific thing I read into the news, even if I had to take an emergency nap while it was actually airing, every Friday the show was there. Once things do return to something more like normal, it’s one of the few things I’ll unambiguously miss about this weird-ass year.

So if that makes an argument for Low as my band of the year (admittedly again… it’s not like Double Negative has aged poorly, either), that does a disservice to those 2020 records I did connect with; even if there are still literally dozens I have to go through, many of which I expect to love, my top picks this year (if as unrankable by me as always) hit me as hard as any top pick in recent years did. So here I present a quick and informal top 5, which the rest of my top 20 following in alphabetical order. Here’s hoping for more time and space in 2021 for music, and even more than that, for more support for those who need it from those who could have been providing it all this time. (The Matthew Good Band, incidentally, always did best with their ballads. “Strange Days” is another I’ve had in my head these days; the image of moving ���backwards, into a wall of fire” has stuck with me since the 90s and it’s never felt more grimly appropriate.)

Greet Death — New Hell

New Hell by Greet Death

This one is, in some sense, cheating; it came out November 2019. But that just means it’s the latest winner of my personal Torres Prize for Ian Being Late to the Party (so named because becoming slightly obsessed with Torres’ Sprinter just after I sent in my 2015 list was the first time I noticed that one of my favorite records of each year tends to get picked up by me just after I call it quits on the year, no matter how long I try to wait). This very doom and gloom slowcore/metal/(whatever, just know it’s heavy) trio at first felt very much like my beloved Cloakroom (whose Time Well has also won a Torres Prize) but sure enough nuances revealed themselves. Back in February it felt almost a little too negative, but then the rest of 2020 happened. And the extended burns of “You’re Gonna Hate What You’ve Done” and the title track remain searing.

Holy Fuck — Deleter

Probably the record I’ve been trying to write about the longest in 2020, and the one I’m most disappointed in myself that I just couldn’t get the requisite paragraphs together. It’s a wonderful effort from the consistently great Toronto resolutely human-created (and —mediated) dance music quartet, one that both feels like a summation of everything they do well, and with the addition of some outside voices (including strong turns from the singers of both Hot Chip and Liars) a step forward at the same time.

Spanish Love Songs — Brave Faces Everyone

Brave Faces Everyone by Spanish Love Songs

As the year got worse, this roar of defiance only got more crucial for me to hear every so often; I was a big enough fan of it, even after writing it up for Dusted, that when they solicited fan footage for a subsequent music video you may just be able to get a glimpse of me in it. (I’m the one in a “No Tories” t-shirt.) My punk rock-loving twin brother was the one who introduced me to Spanish Love Songs and we were supposed to spend an evening in June screaming along to them live in a packed, sweaty room. I need that in my life again.

Julianna Barwick — Healing Is a Miracle

Healing Is A Miracle by Julianna Barwick

It’s a sign of what 2020 has been like here that even just this album title leaves bruises, and while I privately worried Barwick would have a hard time following up 2016’s sublime Will (probably my favorite record that year), it seems that continuing to take whatever downtime she needs to keep focusing and refining her particular muse has once again yielded amazing results. Anyone who thinks they know what a Barwick track sounds like should really check out, say, “Flowers”, but much of this record absolutely sounds like Barwick, just even better than before. She also boasted my wife and I's favorite streaming concert of 2020, an absolutely gorgeous rendition of this album with Mary Lattimore showing up.

Phoebe Bridgers — Punisher

Punisher by Phoebe Bridgers

I joked on Twitter recently that I have far too nice a dad (and far too good a relationship with him) to be as obsessed as I am with Phoebe Bridgers’ “Kyoto”, but here we are. Like most of her generation, Bridgers’ social media presence ranges from shit-posting to inscrutable, but even though things are often just as hard to figure out in her beautiful songs (as they often are in life), there’s an emotional clarity to them that can just grab you deep down. Couple that with seriously impressive songcraft and the progress from her already astounding debut Stranger in the Alps and more than anyone else in 2020 I’m excited to see just where the hell Phoebe Bridgers is going to go, because it feels like she’s talented and hardworking enough to go just about anywhere and drag a lot of our hearts with her.

Other Favorites

Aidan Baker & Gareth Davis — Invisible Cities II

Anastasia Minster — Father

Deftones — Ohms

Hum — Inlet

Kelly Lee Owens — Inner Song

Mesarthim — The Degenerate Era

Perfume Genius — Set My Heart On Fire Immediately

Protomartyr — Ultimate Success Today

Rachel Kiel — Dream Logic

The Ridiculous Trio — The Ridiculous Trio Plays the Stooges

Sam Amidon — Sam Amidon

Shabason, Krgovich & Harris — Philadelphia

Stars Like Fleas — DWARS Session: Live on Radio VPRO

Well Yells — We Mirror the Dead

Yves Tumour — Heaven to a Tortured Mind

Five Reissues/Compilations/etc.

Aix Em Klemm — Aix Em Klemm

Bardo Pond — Adrop/Circuit VIII

Charles Curtis — Performances & Recordings 1998-2018

Coil — Musick to Play in the Dark

Hot Chip — LateNightTales

Ian Mathers

[anime-grimmy]

Little Witch Academia and missed opportunities

Sooo, since I seem to go on a tangent every few months, have another one.

I recently watched the series Little Witch Academia. Now, I did see the original OVA and movie, but that was a few years back, so except for the concept and rough understanding of the characters I went into this show kinda blind. Also, knowing that the series started its own story and changed up a few things got me really interested.

I watched the series and you know what, it was real fun. Great animation and quirky characters, as expected of Trigger. What I didn’t expect was that I got really interested in the story as well. From what I knew about LWA (so, it’s memes) I thought it was mostly an episodic anime, which it was in its first half, but they still carried on the aspects of those single episodes.

However.

The biggest problems I have with the show lie with its characters and the missed opportunities. I do like (most) of the characters, but sometimes it felt like Trigger originally had more planned with them or they just outright shanked them. That is why I’m gonna ramble for a while, go over each character (I care about) and talk about what I like about them but was just not explored enough. Do remember, however, that I still really enjoyed the show and I am considering rewatching it again right away, but these were just some points that got on my nerves while watching.

Well, strap in I guess

(Spoiler warning btw)

Akko

Let’s start with the protagonist, shall we? I’m probably going to mention her a lot with the other characters as well, but first I want to look at her by herself.

Akko is Trigger’s typical high energy character with just a bit of sass. What I like about her is that she is loud, obnoxious, selfish and annoying and the other characters think that too. I normally really don’t enjoy these kinds of characters, even more so when I binge a series, because they get so exhausting. What I like in LWA is that even Akko’s close friends often tell her to calm down or straight up to just shut up. Akko’s character is even more enjoyable because of her great VA (actually the reason I finally picked up the anime). Her animations and reactions are super enjoyable too and tbh, even if she is annoying, she is also the funniest part of the whole show.

But, I’m here to rant, so on to the things that bothered me. Like I said, she is annoying. I can kind of see that it’s not that big of a deal on a weekly basis, maybe then it’s even uplifting. But when you sit through episode after episode it gets exhausting.

What bothers me too is that Akko barely changes. I know not to expect that much subtle character progression from Trigger, since they go from 0 to 100 fast, but it’s even stated in the show. Like the whole thing with patience. Akko was never the patient type but the episode it became the focus, they turned it up to eleven. She became unbearably twitchy and whiny, which was basically your indicator that this was going to be focused on. But after the whole lesson of the ep, in the next one Ursula even says ‘didn’t you just learn to be patient?’. I don’t wish for Akko to take big steps after she gets a lesson, but just show subtle moments where the lesson takes effect. I think it only really bothers me so much because after the ep Akko seems even more impatient.

Another thing is her selfishness / self-righteousness. Diana and Andrew even tell that to her face, that she just shoves her believes in other’s faces without considering how they feel and what their situation is. But she never, even once, doesn’t do it. I get it, it’s her character trait, being the dangerous combo of head-strong and stubborn. But it never, not even once, brings consequences. I thought it would finally happen with the whole Diana situation, because Andrew even points out Akko’s faults, but it all ends well anyways and Akko doesn’t learn at all from this.

I know this is a Trigger protagonist but at some point it just got so frustrating. It’s even sadder when you see what they did with Ryuko in Kill la Kill. Yeah, she’s still her abrasive self in the end, but she does have a more gentle and open side to her too after the show. Akko kind of stays the complete same after the whole show, only that she can do magic better and finally fly (which was honestly a cute ending, ngl). The worst parts, however, were her sad moments towards the end. And I’m not talking about her reaction to learning about Chariot, that was totally ok (though I do have some things to complaint about, but on to that later), but the thing before when she climbed that never-ending tree. Her outburst and her frustration came kind of out of nowhere, at least continuing on from the last episode. Her reasons for being so frustrated and angry make perfect sense, but the build-up is just missing, even in the episode itself. It would have been enough to make Akko look desperately at her Chariot poster a few times or just look really desperate in general after being told ‘no’ by Ursula. But she just looks her usual pouty self when that happens, so her outburst and mistrust in Ursula are very surprising. I do like that that ep is right before the Chariot (betrayal) reveal, because they just made up and got closer, but the episode itself felt so out of left field, it really bothered me.

 Sucy and Lotte

Before you say anything, I’m only lumping them together because what bothers me is not their characters by themselves, they’re great and very enjoyable, but how Trigger fucking dropped them halfway through the show.

Sucy and Lotte seem very similar to their OVA and movie selves, though Sucy seems just a tad bit less evil and Lotte not that much of a typical nerd. In general, I really liked those two and their friendship with Akko.

That said.

I find it terrible how little focus they get in the second half of the show. I mean, it’s great they are those kind of friends that don’t necessarily have to hang around the MC all the time, like in the Diana-centric episode where they go ‘We know you want to go after her, so here, have your stuff and go. We’re going to support you but not take part in it’. Things like that are great! But Akko, Sucy and Lotte are supposed to be best friends,  the main trio, Sucy and Lotte are supposed to be Akko’s mayor pillars of support. And this is beautifully shown in the earlier episodes, but later in the show it just feels like those two lose significance. What pissed me off the most is that in the second OP you see them grasping each other’s arms, a reference to the tapestry about the 7 lights. But in the end, Akko unlocks the staff and the big magic source by herself. I wished they’d gone more for a ‘Luna Lana’ equivalent. That’s just another thing! I watched the OVA and movie yesterday and their friendship is so much better in those! You see them laugh and fight and stick together, it’s so nice. You don’t get a cool moment like ‘Luna Lana’ in the series and I think they really should have. And no, the missile chase doesn’t count, that involved all girls.

Ultimately, I just think it’s sad that those 3 are supposed to represent this close friendship but the later show doesn’t show it at all. I wished other character-centric episodes, like with Constanze or Diana for example, would have happened sooner so that later episodes could push Akko, Sucy and Lotte’s friendship a bit more.

Speaking of Diana, oh boy, here we go.

 Diana and Andrew

Yes, I’m lumping them together because both could have had so much more.

First, Diana. I was actually surprised about her character, because from the little I remember about the OVA and movie, I thought her to be more of a bitch. And I was right. In the first two instalments she is a snobbish, stuck-up, rude bitch, so a Tsundere, but fun in her own rights. Her dynamic with Akko is truly amusing. In the series, however, she is still a bit stuck up, but more just a determined, stern and smart rich girl. She does chastise Akko and is shown as a know-it-all, but she respects others way more and mostly just talks because she knows she’s right. Though, I wish she would have turned out to be something right between the two.

Diana is supposed to be Akko’s rival, so why isn’t she? She’s supposed to be the Viral to Kamina/Simon, the Satsuki to Ryuko, but she just isn’t. Before her little arc, she’s kind of that ‘big goal’, the ‘perfect witch’, so the familiar obstacle that is the rival. Diana even gains some respect for Akko but also gets disappointed in her shortly after (tbh, same). But all this progression is kind of one-sided, because Akko’s perception of Diana barely changes. They don’t really have a dynamic going on in the first half, more so their own development. Heck, in the second OP it’s shown that they’re supposed to mirror Chariot and Croix but they honestly don’t. Because Chariot and Croix were two friends that were striving for the same goal but due to how differently they tried to reach it, they grew apart. Diana is striving for the same power that Chariot and Croix did and Akko, well, she doesn’t, she just goes along because she wants to meet Chariot. Which is fine, but it feels like this ‘rivalry’ is being forced onto them. Maybe that’s also intentional, but it feels weird. Diana even once says ‘I never considered us rivals’, which is understandable, but to me it was more of a surprise that Akko saw her as one. To me, it always felt like, even if Diana didn’t realize it, she viewed Akko as her own goal to reach. Akko on the other hand just gets really miffed with Diana, and yeah, she strives to be as good with magic as her, but there’s no real rivalry, not even an implied one.

Then the whole thing with both being Chariot fans and Diana getting Akko out of her slump. I already said it once, but I still think it should have been Lotte and Sucy who ultimately got her to perk up again (I’ll describe how I think this whole thing should have gone. Again, this is only cos I was unsatisfied with the resolution, the original is fine in itself though). What bothers me so much about this is that it feels like they shoe-horned this whole thing in because that’s how it was in the original. I get what they want to do, get a parallel between Akko and Diana, even more so because they both lost their magic to Chariot, and since they’re closer now than at the beginning Diana manages to reach her. But in the end, it feels forced. Both girls had one adventure together and Diana was just starting to open up to Akko, where the hell did all that understanding come from. It’s even harder to believe because it’s shown that Diana is good at relaying facts and choosing the most logical course of action, she’s not known to just openly share her feelings, more so to someone she just learned to consider a friend. And it also feels kind of lazy that a pep talk from a fellow fan and victim would just push Akko out of her slump. Instead of somehow cramming that fact in and making Diana have lost her power too, they could have gone along the route of ‘so what if she stole your magic, you’re too stubborn to let that stop you!’

Like I said, I’ll go into detail about this scene later, but first.

Andrew.

Oh. My sweet boy, they did you so dirty.

I’m going to say it right now, I love Andrew’s introduction episode, it’s probably one of my favourites. And I also like his addition to the series in general, because whereas Diana is Akko’s feud in personality and ability, Andrew is supposed to be her opposite in ideologies. But he isn’t just a male Diana who doesn’t like magic, though at first they make you think that.

I love his introduction ep so much, because they don’t just introduce an obstacle for Akko, but once again show that the show can play with your expectations. Andrew is first shown as this typical snobby, stuck up rich kid, which he is, but even when faced with someone he disagrees with, he shows a level of respect. Then further in the episode, you see that he is in fact a calm, helpful when a bit teasing individual. It also shows that he actually has fun when in danger, which is a nice change to normally one-note characters. But what I love most about this is, that he is not just this ‘snobby non-believer turned enthusiast through one outing’ cliché. Andrew gets to have a bit of an adventure with Akko and get to see amazing magic at that, but he stays pessimistic. He doesn’t just change his world view in a second, because that’s not what he was raised to do.

Having established all that, every time he shows up, he kind of matters less and less. The whole party episode was fun and all, but with Akko still being stuck in her narcissistic world view, the effect of the ep is small. Because what it really is about, is to show on one hand that Andrew is very subordinate to his father and that his perception of magic isn’t necessarily his own opinion, so there is a possibility to change his mind. On the other hand, it’s to show Akko that some people make decisions not based on their own volition and sometimes their opinion can’t just be changed like that.

But in the end Akko doesn’t learn her lesson and even if they do play a bit with changing Andrew’s mind, there really isn’t much to it. When I heard that originally it was planned for Akko and Andrew to be together at the end, but they scrapped that idea, it made so much sense why Andrew felt so out of place in the last few episode. Because he was. Honestly, it really shows now how they weren’t so sure what to do with him at the end, because he was not supposed to be the one to make that big of an impact, neither on Akko nor on the plot as a whole. He does say something very significant to Akko though, to be her own witch and not try to be Chariot, but that gets kind of brushed under the rug, because again, he isn’t supposed to be the one to make an impact anymore. Same thing with his ‘I believe’. It’s just there to be there, because even if he opened up more to magic and Akko herself, I don’t think he would have been snapped out of his ideology that he got punched into him since he was young and just abandon his father’s decision he had just started to doubt.

I think all of this would have flown better if the whole Diana arc would have been earlier in the series. There would have been more time for Diana and Akko to find a common footing and become believable friends, Andrew would have more reason to be mesmerized by witches and magic, because he didn’t just get to see determination from Akko but from Diana as well (and you kinda have that ‘go against your family’ stuff too) and then, in the later part of the series, there would have been more time for the main trio to develop a bit more.

But even if that hadn’t happened, I just want to get to changing up the scenes after Chariot’s reveal, because I think if they had handled all that a bit better, then the original ending would have felt even more sincere.

 Cheering up depressed Akko

Like I said, I find Trigger’s solution to this small arc lazy. Because you start up with Andrew and Akko meeting up to give her hat back, Andrew says stuff that not only gets Akko thinking but himself as well. Then you got the reveal, everybody searching and Diana being the only person needed to cheer her up. I know it can be argued that, only after Lotte comes in crying with the others in tow, Akko cheers up, but I think most of it can be chalked up to Diana, which is such plot convenience. Again, the things that bother me are the whole ‘Chariot fan and victim’ thing and how Lotte, Sucy, Andrew and the others are not really significant in this moment. The biggest thing that bothers me is that they start this mini arc with Andrew telling Akko to be herself and reach her goal with her own strengths in mind, not because she is chasing someone else. But then with Diana, it’s basically a ‘I could do it, so you can do it too’. I know they’re trying to build a parallel between those two and show how Diana opens up to Akko, but I think that just misses the point of what they had sat up.

Before I get to describing my idea, again, you can totally disagree with me, heck, you don’t have to like what I come up with at all. But just know that this is supposed to be a rant and I purposefully highlight the things that bothered me. I still love the show and only rant about it because I know Trigger could have made this already fun show even better.

Anyways, here is how I’d handled this arc:

The start of the arc is still the same. Akko and Andrew meet up, he tells her to believe in her own strength, Akko gets distracted and runs off, Andrew gets thoughtful. You have the whole reveal with Chariot, Akko vanishes and Diana and the others go search for her.

Now, what I want this arc to accomplish is, that Akko learns to believe in her own strengths but also to show how her friends have her back. Because that’s what the whole ending is about, right? Showing how Akko changed people, how they believe in themselves and even more so, believe in her. So, I want all of her friends to play a part in cheering her up, but make Sucy and Lotte the biggest influence of them all.

I’d start the changes from where Diana is nearly at Akko’s location. This time however, she finds Andrew close by. After the whole Parliament meeting stuff, him and his father are still in town and he went out at night, wandering around, deep in thought. He somehow managed to make himself think about his own situation with all that he had told Akko.

Diana, knowing that Andrew had met up with Akko, approaches him and asks if he had seen Akko. Since he is confused and worried after hearing she’s gone, Diana explains the situation and Andrew decides to help them search.

He is also the one that finds Akko first, right on that bench, covered in snow. (this part is a bit inspired by a post I read). He runs over to her, shocked at how cold and unresponsive she is. He gives her his jacket and he brushes the snow from he hair. He sits quietly next to her, worried glances and all. He thinks about what Diana told him and mulls over an answer. In the end, he basically repeats to her what he told her earlier that day and maybe something along the lines ‘and honestly, I wouldn’t believe you don’t have magic, because to me you are truly bewitching’, just so that you have nod back to the party, only now it comes from the heart and not because of a potion. That gets her to perk up and Andrew just gives her a reassuring smile.

Then Diana comes in, finally finding the two. Diana takes Akko to the café, Andrew staying behind. (here Akko could keep his jacket, so that in the end you have the parallel of him bringing her the hat and her returning the jacket). The café scene is kind of similar to the original, but I’d change the reason for Diana’s loss of magic. Instead of her losing her magic abilities all of a sudden, maybe she could have had a tough time manifesting them from the start. But Diana shares with Akko that she was inspired by Chariot too and that kept her going, believing in herself and her magic and finally succeeding. She tells Akko the whole thing with how she got envious of her, but at the same time that, just like Chariot, Akko had kind of become an inspiration as well. Now you don’t have the ‘I could, so you can too.’ but more Diana cementing that Akko has powers of her own and is already influencing people.

Then in come Amanda, Jasminka and Constanze. Amanda goes straight to shaking Akko and ruffling her hair, shouting something about ‘who am I gonna cause trouble with if you go’. Jasminka offers Akko her candies and Constanze shoves plans in her face, trying to show her that she needs her assistant. It’s just small things, but it would allude to the three of them caring about Akko and in Amanda’s and Constanze’s cases, that she had made an impact on them, tying in previous episodes.

Lastly come in Lotte and Sucy. Lotte is still crying and asking her if she was leaving. But they would kind of go into more detail, like a small recap of all that happened and how important she was. They would also talk about how Akko has grown so much already and so what if Chariot had taken her magic, she still inspired Akko and Akko therefore grew into her own witch that now inspires people.

After that, Akko finally snaps out of it totally, maybe grinning full force before sobbing and burying herself in Lotte and Sucy’s arms.

I think in general with a recap of the show so far and showing Akko’s journey, it would be a good set-up for the end. You got Akko back on her feet, her faith rebuilt but also her believe in herself strengthened. You got the bond between the characters established which makes the chase after the missile more impactful and you actually got more reason for Andrew to cement his own believes more. (maybe have him walk in the café too, just so he sees how many people Akko has inspired but also how much people can believe in magic)

 But like I said many times already, this is just my take on what could have been handled better a bit. I still really love the show and its characters. I don’t necessarily want a whole new season, since they did wrap up many things already, but I’d love a movie or some OVAs to explore some characters more in depth.

 Speaking of which, I’m just going to drop this here at the end, because I do want to talk about it but not that in depth. The thing about Ursula/Chariot and Croix. I kind of enjoyed the OVA-Ursula more, because she was kind of spunky and you could tell that she believed in her own strength. Series-Ursula is a freaking Jedi, but she is just so meek and nervous, and that even as Chariot, which I didn’t really like. Croix is an interesting character and I love me my evil scientists, but she turned generic antagonist at the end. As expected, tbh. The only thing about Croix I want to highlight is that I believed so hard that she and Andrew were somehow linked or related. Because when you binge the series, Croix shows up shortly after Andrew’s introduction. And in a series with so many unique eyes, they have the fucking same. I just thought that Trigger was hinting at something, because not only do they have a very similar shape and the exact same string green colour, the first few episodes with them heavily focus the camera on their eyes. Especially with Croix! It felt like the anime told me ‘look, look close at those eyes, seem familiar, right?’. I waited so long for something to happen but it never did, what a shame. Though, maybe they did have something planned but just like the initial ending, they scrapped that idea but left the designs untouched.

 Anyways, I’ve been ranting for over 4000 words now, I think that should be enough for one little analysis. If you have your own thoughts, feel free to share them with me!

[betheflame]

Saving the Multiverse

A Fluff Fill for the @stevetonygames​.  Square: Multiverse Shenangians Capwolf + Everyone Lives in the Tower + Soulmates + Royalty AU + Superior Iron Man Universe: What If #3: What if the Avengers had Never Existed

“Your Majesty.” Jarvis cleared his throat and waited for Steve to turn from the weight bag.

“Yes, Jarvis?”

“King Anthony has requested your presence in the basement workshop I am not supposed to know about.”

Steve snorted. “What did he call it this time?”

“The Situation Room.” Jarvis sighed deeply and Steve started laughing. Nothing gave his husband more joy than winding up his valet and long-time right hand man, and nothing seemed to frustrate Jarvis more. 

“He’s been watching too much old American television again,” Steve laughed. “He must have gotten a hold of more the last time we visited Earth 199999. I’m on my way, Jarvis, don’t worry.”

“Your Majesty,” Jarvis replied, “if I may remind you that the Duke of Brooklyn and Lord Baltimore are expected for dinner, so please implore his majesty to be brief with whatever discovery he is going to share with you.”

“Sure, J,” Steve laughed again. “I’ll just rewrite my husband’s entire personality. But I hear you.”

Steve took off his boxing gloves and toweled off the sweat that had accumulated during his workout. He wound his way through the corridors of the Starklandia Palace and hit the panel in the library that led to Tony’s workshop. 

King Anthony Edouard Stark, King of the Iron Islands of Earth 6729, was the 27th Stark to sit on the Iron Throne. He was one of the first to do so with a common born soldier and the absolute first to do so with someone of the same sex and gender as himself. 

Some of his subjects had expressed… concerns when he declared Steven Grant Rogers of the Iron principality of Brooklyn to be his groom and fellow ruler, but Steven’s record as an excellent servant of the crown smoothed things quickly. 

As did Tony’s two best friends, Natalia and Virginia, working their way through every single organization and club in the Kingdom and doing the most intense charm offensive anyone had ever seen. The fact that Steve’s childhood best friend was the heir to the Brooklyn dukedom didn’t hurt either. 

“Hey baby, what’s the emergency?” Steve called as he entered Tony’s beloved lair. 

“I got a message from Inventor,” Tony replied. “His Thor heard of a universe where Thanos is threatening but there are no Avengers.” 

Steve’s knees nearly buckled. “No Avengers at all? In any iteration?”

Tony shook his head. “Inventor and Cap are, as you can imagine -”

“Fucking petrified,” Steve interrupted. 

“Language, Your Majesty,” Tony said with a cocked eyebrow. 

“Apologies to your delicate sensibilities,” Steve said. “They’re absolutely fucking petrified and probably shitting bricks.” 

Tony grinned and crossed the room to kiss his husband. “They’ll need all of us.”

Steve nodded and started doing calculations in his head. 

About five years previous, on Steve’s 35th birthday, Tony had called him into the workshop and shown him his present. 

“You invented what?”

“A way for us to travel between fixed spots in the multiverse,” Tony explained. “You said you always wanted to see the historic artists in other universes.”

“I did, in the same way that Bucky has always wanted a herd of unicorns to raise as his personal pets,” Steve replied. “Travel between the universes is metaphysically impossible.” 

“Not anymore,” Tony said and handed Steve a pile of clothing. “Go put these on. They’ll keep us invisible in the other universes so we don’t cause disturbances. Chop chop, handsome, we’re heading to watch Van Gogh’s pain dry in whatever universe you choose.”

Steve had been skeptical - how safe could it really be - but soon, the pair were hopping all over the universes. They soon let their best friends in on their secret power and traveling together became a favorite pastime of the group the citizens referred to as The Royal Family. There was the Duke of Brooklyn, James Barnes, and his partner Lord Baltimore, Samuel Wilson. Lady Virginia Potts, Duchess Natalia Romanova, Lord James Rhodes, Lord Clinton Barton, and others rounded out the group, who comprised the closest advisors and friends of the royal couple, as both had been orphaned at a young age. 

The travels were fun and playful - but then they’d started to meet versions of themselves. 

The first time was on Earth 1872, where Tony was a blacksmith and Steve was the sheriff and they told all of the locals that they weren’t together, but then the kings saw them sneaking off behind the barn. 

“Do you think that we’re together in a lot of universes?” Steve had asked later that night. “Do you think we’re similar people, I mean, that if you and I meet, we bicker and spar and fight but ultimately fall in love?”

“I’d like to,” Tony confessed. 

They mostly observed - especially that one universe they ended up in where Steve was a werewolf everyone called ‘Capwolf’ and Tony was a vampire and it all felt a little… farfetched - until they landed on Earth 199999 in New York City on the top of Avengers Tower in that Earth year 2012. 

“Who the fuck are you and why are you wearing Tony’s face?” A blond man with a bow quickly drawn asked. 

“I could ask the same question about why he is wearing mine,” Tony replied calmly, “but the answer is that we are from another part of the multiverse.”

“Impossible,” a bespectacled man said quietly. “That’s a metaphysical myth.”

“Myths are just things science hasn’t proven yet,” both Tonys said at the same time and the room froze. 

“I am King Anthony of the Iron Islands in Earth 6729, and this is my husband, King Steven,” Tony said calmly. 

“You know anyone named Targaryen?” The man with the bow asked, and Tony noted he had not stopped aiming it at him. 

“There’s a clan by that name that my family defeated centuries ago,” Tony said, “but there are none living.”

“Check for a chick named Daenerys,” Bow Man snorted and then looked at his Steve. “Those are characters from that show, Cap. This can’t be real. What do you want us to do?”

“Can you guys give us the room?” New York Steve answered instead. There was a brief argument from a few of the room’s inhabitants before they all left. When the room was empty, New York Tony gestured to the couches. 

“Get comfy, fellas, we may be here a while.”

As they four talked, they came to several agreements: one, the Tonys would work on establishing cross-universe ways of communicating so that they could share intel and the Steves could share strategic plans; two, codenames for all duplicate creatures would be necessary, so Earth 199999 chose ‘Inventor’ and ‘Cap’ and the kings went with their given titles; three, they would come to each other’s aid as often as possible. 

King Tony shared the technology of multiverse travel with Inventor and within months, they were all connecting universes together like never before. And it turns out, Steve’s question on that quiet night was correct - they were connected in every universe. Sometimes platonically, sometimes romantically, but always connected. When they fought, the universe was vulnerable. When they were in accord, the universe was strong. 

When one of them turned evil… 

Tony still had nightmares about their battle with Superior Iron Man. Steve would often find him in the lair, muttering to himself over holograms and computers and talking to Inventor or Engineer or Toni or one of his other selves about what they could do. The rest of their family met their versions as well  - there was always mischief about whenever the Duke of Brooklyn and Bucky Barnes got together. 

In the last five years of adventures, they’d seen universes where everyone was divided in dominant and subordinate, universes where instinctual mating trumped consent, universes where everyone had purple skin, universes where horses were in charge because they were deemed more intelligent than the humans. Steve’s favorite, however, was the ones where everyone had a soulmate. 

Earth 1493, for example, was where everyone had two soulmates - a platonic and a romantic. In that universe, Steve’s platonic was Bucky, and his romantic was Tony. Tony was platonically attached to Pepper, and Pepper and Bucky were romantically mated to each other. Steve and Bucky didn’t have super powers in that one, but Tony and Pepper still ran SI. They all had kids who grew up together - with Sam & Carol, and Rhodey & Nat, and Clint & Laura - and they’d met their counterparts at Tony and Steve’s 25th anniversary party. King Steven had cried over how beautiful everything was. King Tony had rolled his eyes affectionately and held his husband as he cried. 

“Steve, baby,” Tony said, interrupting Steve from his reverie. “I’ll go tell Pep that she and Harry have the kingdom, and you get everyone else?”

The other constant in the multiverse - besides Tony and Steve’s connection - was Thanos, the Mad Titan who was attempting to destroy each universe. He’d succeeded in far too many, and they’d learned the only ones with fighting chances are ones where the Avengers were present in some form. The idea that Thor had found one where there was no Avengers Academy, no Earth’s Mightiest Heroes, no Tsums, no Avengers at all, and they’d found out before Thanos had destroyed everything… 

“Avengers Assemble,” Steve said into the communication device the Engineer had concocted for them. 

It was time - once again - to save a universe.

[defie22]

Hello, nice to meet you. What are your views on Hiyori Tono? Have a nice day ahead and stay safe~

Hello! That’s a loaded question but I am more than happy to answer. Lol

To sum it, I love this character because of how complex he is.

I think his character is very interesting because he is someone who grew up very lonely and without anyone to lean on. His family wasn’t around and he had trouble making friends. Then he met Ikuya, the first person to give him any sort of attention so he got attached. I feel this is sadly relatable.

Then, said only friend almost died in front of him- easily traumatizing him for life (the show sort of touches on this but not enough I think).

Additionally, Natsuya unrightfully put this burden on his shoulders to watch out for (lowkey babysit) his brother- not really caring for Hiyori’s own interest or mental health. So unsurprisingly, Hiyori takes this job seriously because he’s a child who listens to his elders- and disregards his own feelings to make Ikuya happy and this goes on for YEARS.

Hiyori is like a combination of a brother/mother/friend to Ikuya. Makoto is like that with Haru but the difference is that Makoto knows boundaries and his friendship with Haru is much more reciprocated. When Makoto is off balance, Haru immediately notices and wants to address it. I don’t think Ikuya and Hiyori are in tune like that. I think Hiyori would notice immediately when something is off but Ikuya wouldn’t unless it was extremely obvious. Also, both Haru and Makoto have other friends who they hang out with; Ikuya and Hiyori clearly do not.

I don’t dislike Ikuya at all but his he does take his friendship with Hiyori for granted. Yes, what Hiyori did in canon was too much, I can’t deny but it came from a place of good intentions. It’s unfortunate that Ikuya didn’t put up some boundaries with Hiyori or expand their friendship circle throughout middle and high school.

Ultimately, Hiyori doesn’t really know what a healthy relationship is and probably can’t even tell that his friendship with Ikuya is unhealthy and one sided. Ikuya doesn’t put much effort in their friendship because he knows he doesn’t have to. They’d have a lot of work to do to make their relationship healthy. I also feel that neither of them can be their truest selves with each other. Are they truly best friends if they can’t be fully comfortable?

In terms of shipping them, I lightly ship them from what we have seen in canon. In my head canon though, they work through their issues and gain a much healthier relationship with boundaries. However, I ultimately would want Hiyori to expand his friendship circle and fall in love with someone else who’d treat him better. I actually wrote a fanfic about this that I’ll link below.

My fic

[goblinconceivable]

A runup

Gots to write it out if I want to start.  Overly long, rambly, and not worth reading, merely worth writing, and I always do so in a technically public forum.

Right.  So.  What bugged me about Hook’s treatment is that all aspects of his character devolved to being Emma’s devoted lover.  It was treacle, pure treacle.  And unlike Snow and Charming, who drew strength from each other, and did everything as a united front, HookedSwan was lopsided.  Emma is the Savior, the tip of an arrow with her loved ones behind her.  And while her loved ones were interwoven with each other, in history and present, interrelationships growing and strengthening over time, Hook’s wide history with various characters didn’t evolve.

Yes, he fought and adventured along with the rest.  But he never felt part of a team.  He didn’t have many moments with other characters, not in a deep sense, it was always ‘for Emma.”  Which has it’s place in fanfiction, but that’s the problem: canon should not be fanfiction, especially with an ensemble cast.

Enter Regina.  Though in fairness it’s Regina I adore, and Hook is just a pretty and interesting character to match her with.  But while Emma may open her love to someone (I never understood her love for Hook, except that he gave his ship up for her?  Why does she love -him- apart from his love for her?), I think her true match is Baelfire.  They are the ones who found each other, as is the case with True Love.  

The best argument for Hook is that Emma may be a princess, but grew up in the Real World, and in the Real World love is something we often fight to create and keep, not a predestined fact.  But, again, aside from fulfilling that, I don’t get the relationship.  Not when Emma’s side of things is fueled by the urge to protect the love she has, without having fought to get it, as it was handed to her.

So compare to Regina.  Who, frankly, is better at loving.  Snide of me.  But she’s a whip, fighting for everything, even if she goes about it the wrong way.  She’s constantly disappointed but keeps trying, keeps fighting, without prophecy on her side.  When she’s offered anything - second chances from the Charmings being the most notable, she fights against it, against herself oftentimes, and it’s that struggle that is interesting.

So how would the story have played out if Hook’s random devotion focused on Regina instead?  And... Why not?  She’s strong, she’s a fighter, she’s “special” in terms of magic, she’s broken.  But her darkness matches, surpasses his own, and that’s where canon failed.  They kept reintroducing Hooks dark past, his own darkness, but as something to leave in the past, not he’s found light.  But as a lengthy and successful storyline noted with Regina, it’s not leaving the past behind but embracing our past selves, dark as they might be, which allows us to find peace and move forwards.

There is a nod to this, when Regina stepped in when Hook was the Dark One.  It may have been love for Emma that kept pulling at him, but it was Regina’s understanding of the heart of his issues that cut to the core, and guess what?  It wasn’t about romantic love, it was familial.  It was fundamental.  It was about Who He Is, and who anyone is is much more than a romantic entanglement.  Charming and Snow know that about each other, accept and foster that. Emma just keeps saying he’s changed.

And he has.  Regina has,  But their worth is lodged in who they were, as much as who they evolved into being.  Regina knows that, which makes HookedQueen a more organic love story.  I love dynamics where the female is further along, wiser, stronger.  I loved Robin, and loved that he was further along, had never been as dark, but was accepting of her past and understood.  They would have been happy.  But Regina’s story is to lose light, that’s the unfortunate canon, and drawing from that, ultimately her story of love is a story of Loves.  

Daniel and Robin became a part of her, a part of her story.  Her strength is to find more than one True Love, because her strength is when she fights to love again after loss.  That is reality.  That is the true Real World.

Hook is the same.  Assuming he and Milah were true love he learned to love again.  Though frankly, I don’t think they were, or when they found Milah in Purgtory she would have been less disinterested in him - she was dismissive when Rumple indicated her unfinished business had to do with Hook.  If it was true love she’d have been jumping to find him.

Break for assessment: Emma and Hook were True Love because Canon said they were, and there’s no getting around that, except by going around that.  Though hmm, there IS.  They weren’t confirmed as True Love for a while, and even then there’s wiggle room in how True Love isn’t just between Lovers, and a Savior Superpower could be True Love in general, all love being true and whatnot.  But anyway.

Regina and Hook.  Hook resisted instantly falling for Emma because of his belief in Milah, which by that time had been corrupted by his love for vengence.  Regina resiste Robin for the same reasons.  So, happily, they resist each other.  Equality, that, levels the playing field.  But Hook caved with Emma, as he would with Regina, which sets up a similar dynamic, which was, let’s face it, lovely to see because a pining Pirate is a very handsom pirate.  But Regina doesn’t want a doting follower, she wants an equal, or rather someone stronger in some ways, weaker in others.  She needs to be loved first to allow her to lower walls and let herself love.  

She would question blind devotion, fight it as a weakness, and that’s where it’s interesting.  It’s not just a denial of real affection for Hook, not just a wall put up, but a deep questioning of Why.  And that’s interesting.  A journey internal and external (yay plot) that justifes how two hearts twisted into darkness find each other once they’ve begun to untwist themselves.  Regina began long before, Hook’s heart started to go out with Bae, if not before, in both cases a child acting catalyst.

Regina fought for her relationships with the rest of the characters, and they fought for her.  She’s the inroad for Hook to actually get the same, which is how his character needs to develop into something independant yet a part of the whole crew.  He is a pirate, she is a queen.  Why are they not called PirateQueen or QueenPirate?  HookedQueen makes it sound like he caught her by the tip of steel.

Anyway, I didn’t get as far as I hoped, progress made picking apart what didn’t work with the Emma/Hook dynamic, and inroads to what dynamic would work for me with Regina and Hook.  Another shot at research and some pen to paper time would be worthwhile.  And, as I was so lately reminded, a oneshot is a good place to start to begin working things out.  I mostly bypassed that with Rory/Logan because I half wrote some things before finding a clear story to complete, but they were dark in a lighter way, different fandom and genre and all.  But this will take some work, epic always does.

[tyrannuspitch]

30-ish days of carry on: days 4-6

(Trying to catch up by grouping some questions together)

4. Which character would you like to go to lunch with?

Like I said for day 2, I would *love* to spend some time with Ebb, but I’m going to have to ask her to wash her hands first, I’m sorry.

5. Favourite non-Snowbaz ship - Not applicable, I'm not really a shipper, sorry

6. Favourite non-romantic OTP

Okay. This one’s a bit of a complicated question, but ultimately the answer is basically… all of them? All of the four main characters. I like group dynamics and found families and so on. But we don’t actually really see all four interact as friends in canon, so let’s break this down.

Penny and Baz are both fierce and passionate and academic, they get excited about the same things, they’re competitive and love debating with each other, but they also just… really respect each other. Not just academically – I like the way Penny’s always trying to be the reasonable one about Baz with Simon (though she never thinks he’s *not* a threat, because he has… proven himself to be dangerous), and I love how they trust each other so easily despite being on opposite sides. (Once they have the evidence. But I also really like that, in that final scene in the White Chapel, Penny, who loves to interrogate people, doesn’t need all the information to trust Baz. She just sees him acting trustworthy and sees that Simon trusts him and is like, okay, this is happening now.)

Penny and Simon are both logical, stubborn, straight-forward, and recklessly curious. It’s obvious they’ve been best friends for years and have been through a lot together - They have a sibling-like easy closeness, they have in-jokes and No Secrets Pacts and Ranting-About-Baz Quotas and arguments that have been running for years, and Simon quotes Penny all the time which I love. I think they can be very grounding for each other – Penny in her “Well, let’s make a list of the facts” way, and Simon in his “But what does that actually mean” way. I think they’re also both quite unusual people, who wouldn’t have the easiest time making friends otherwise (and Penny acts like she doesn’t care, but if she didn’t have Simon, she really would.) They’re just… so important to each other, it’s lovely.

And obviously, the ultimate destination for Simon and Baz is romantic, but I actually really like the “friends” stage of their enemies-to-friends-lovers journey. The bickering, the fucking with each other, the reluctant admiration, the way they start wanting to defend each other, and of course the point where Simon starts getting cocky enough to properly take the piss out of Baz who’s like… Wait. I am your deadly enemy. You can’t do that. Stop it. But it’s too late.

(And, you know. Obviously the newness/precariousness of it won’t last forever, but not all of this has to go away once they start dating.)

But also… I really want to see Agatha as a fully realised character, because honestly… I still feel like I barely know her. I want to know how she fitted into the Team Chosen One dynamic for those first seven books. (Especially the first five, before she and Simon were dating.) I want to see how she could fit in again, now that they’ve all grown up a bit. (Alternatively, I would very much enjoy seeing a world where they went directly from Team-Chosen-One to Team-Chosen-One-Plus-Baz-For-Some-Reason, either via villain decay or just via Simon and Baz making some very bad and hasty decisions, but I know that wouldn’t end well. But it would be FUN.)

I don’t know what Agatha’s dynamic in a real friendship with any of these three would look like, but there’s definitely potential. She and Simon are both only children who love sports and animals and shitty TV, they grew up together and were close enough to think they were in love, but neither of them has turned out exactly like they were expected to, and I’d love to see them sort of… re-form that bond as their more authentic selves. And Agatha and Baz both have this sharpness to them, they’re both less confident and more introverted than they seem, they’re from incredibly similar backgrounds and both a bit disillusioned with it – they could definitely find common ground once they got past that old suspicion and bitterness. (And I think they’d probably want to, once one of them pointed out to the other that they were still just putting each other in boxes.) And Agatha and Penny… are honestly very different people, but that doesn’t *have* to be a problem. I think they could gain a lot from listening to each other, sharing their different perspectives, and taking an interest in their differences rather than just dismissing them. Basically, even if they disagree a lot, they need to respect each other. Please. Surely it can’t be that hard.

Ultimately, I think Agatha could just be a good balancing addition to the group. We all love Simon & Penny & Baz, but three-person dynamics have this way of always leaving someone out (even if the different members are left out equally often), and having a fourth person there could help that. Have Penny and Baz been debating an obscure part of magical history for almost an hour? Simon and Agatha can roll their eyes at each other and smirk at the old magician’s stupid names. Are Simon and Penny reminiscing about another of their magical woodland adventures? It’s okay, Agatha, Baz hated it too. And Baz will probably back you up when you point out that stepping into a faerie ring with no plan again is a good way to lose a few souls. It just… it could work so well. And I like it when things tie together neatly. I’d love these four to be a proper group.

[30 Days of Carry On: Questions] [Previous answers]

[blueeyeswhitegarden]

Arc V Anniversary Day 12

Day 12: Favorite ships?

While there are quite a few Arc V pairings that I really like, Fruitshipping is definitely my favorite one. As I mentioned in an earlier prompt, I initially wasn't interested in the pairing simply because I thought any shipping nods would feel really forced. Fortunately, that wasn't the case. I think it really helps that the series emphasizes and showcases their friendship early on. Fruitshipping is an example of childhood friends developing romantic feelings for each other done right in my opinion. Well before they were separated and had to deal with the dimensional war, Yuya and Yuzu had some really sweet moments that showed how they cared about each other. Yuya was completely supportive and confident in Yuzu's skills during her duel against Masumi. After his duel against Kaichdoki, Yuya was clearly depressed, but being able to watch Yuzu's duel made him smile. Moments like those really helped to convey a sweet friendship between both of them instead of making it completely one sided.

It also made their emotional breakdowns upon being separated from each other much more believable. It did feel like they had lost something important once they were separated and in Yuzu's case, she didn't know if she could ever get back home. I love that they continue to support each other throughout the whole series despite being apart from each other. Yuzu spending her first duel in the Friendship Cup to reassure him was quite touching. Yuya discarding Smile World, the embodiment of his ideals and a card left behind by his father, just because he valued Yuzu's smile more so was really heartwarming. I especially love that Yuzu was able to reach out to Yuya even when they both had merged with their counterparts and had become Zarc and Ray respectively. It could have easily been just the typical female lead calling out to the male lead like what happens in plenty of series. But because their friendship has been well established and was shown multiple times just how important it is for both of them, it was much more meaningful than that. It showed that their bond was so strong that nothing, not even their original selves, could tear them apart.

As fantastic as a love confession would have been at the end of the series, I don't think it was really necessary. Yuya traveled through different dimensions to find Yuzu and Yuzu did whatever she could to help Yuya even when they were apart from each other. They do love each other and it's up to the audience to determine if it is romantic or platonic love. That's another reason why I love the pairing. While I do firmly believe that they developed romantic feelings for each other, people can just as easily read it as a strong platonic love and I don't think one reading is better than the other. Platonic love is still as important as romantic love after all. I just love that their friendship was always important to them since that makes romantic aspects of the pairing more natural and believable too.

I also really like Appleshipping. Despite how their relationship was shown primarily through flashbacks, I thought that they did a good job in showing just how important Rin is to Yugo. Even his gag of mistaking the other Bracelet Girls for Rin showed just how much he missed her and how happy he was at the thought that she suddenly came back. Building a D-Wheel together showed how smart both Rin and Yugo are considering how difficult that was for two Commons kids to do in the City. It showed that they were both determined to win their way through the Friendship Cup and find a better life for themselves. Yugo always seemed happy to be with Rin, but I don't think he fully realized just how important she was to him until she was gone. Yugo was completely devoted in rescuing her throughout the series and that made their relationship a lot more touching than I initially expected it to be.

Their reunion was both comical and emotional given Rin's massive kick to Yugo's stomach and then immediately crying in relief that Yugo finally came. It showed that she was afraid after being captured. Ruri at least knew what Academia was, while Rin was most likely completely in the dark about the dimensional war at least prior to being kidnapped. I firmly believe that Yugo did talk to the real Rin and that the brainwashing didn't take affect until after the creepy smile showed up, so they did have a brief reunion. Despite Yugo's best efforts, he ultimately wasn't able to save Rin, which does give the pairing a more tragic ending in a sense. But I thought that was rather fitting given what was going to happen to the counterparts and despite the backlash towards the ending, I do think that there were quite a few hints pointing towards that the counterparts wouldn't be able to split apart again. Besides that, they're still together at the end. They may not have their own bodies anymore, but they can still interact with each other since they were able to see themselves during the finale. It may not be the most ideal ending, but Yugo and Rin were able to be together again in the end and I still think that's what matters the most to them.

Genesisshipping is another favorite pairing of mine. I'm usually not into pairings where the characters don't or barely interact in the series, but Genesisshipping is one of the exceptions. Similar to Predatorshipping, I kind of enjoyed all of the what if scenarios involving Zarc and Ray. They both were originally regular humans who through different circumstances obtained powers akin to gods. And those powers represent destruction and creation respectively. That setup alone would make for some interesting what if situations for the pairings. But I think what really made me like this pairing was seeing the counterparts interact with each other. Even though Zarc wanted to defeat Ray in their inevitable rematch and Ray was determined to defeat Zarc in this cycle of destruction and creation, most of their reincarnations were drawn together. Ray wanted to keep the Zarc's evil heart at bay, which is which her reincarnations were close to Zarc's, but it seemed deeper than just that. Yuya, Yuto and Yugo deeply cared about Yuzu, Ruri and Rin and vice versa. Yuri and Serena were the only exceptions due to Leo keeping them apart and interestingly enough, they seemed the most Zarc and Ray like out of the counterparts.

Despite everything Zarc did to the original world and Ray being the one to finally defeat him, the strong connection between their reincarnations made me wonder what would have happened if they had become friends in the original world. I don't think Zarc would have become a demon and destroyed the world if he had another connection aside from his dragons and Ray was seemingly the only other person who could feel the anger in Zarc's monsters too. They may not have met prior to Zarc’s downfall and they were willing to do whatever it took to defeat each other, but given the strong bonds between most of the counterparts that can be easily read as the characters developing romantic feelings for each other, I like to think that deep down, both Zarc and Ray wanted a friend that they could truly connect with. Their duel, along with the destruction of the original world, set the storyline for the series in motion and without that, we wouldn't have the series or the same characters that many fans grew to love over the course of Arc V. Even so, it is immensely interesting and tragic to think that if the circumstances were different, Zarc and Ray could have become friends and perhaps into a couple eventually in their own world.

[kannra21]

Monoma loving hours and I'm actually very tired by now

*I know many of you have already discussed similar things so I decided to add my own opinion as well. Hope you enjoy!*

Still announcing my general disappointed with ch215. Whatever, I'm glad to know Monoma's Quirk better and that the clocks he's working with are more than just some accessories on his belt.

I think they're really cool and help him overcome his small disadvantages a whole lots *well, not in the circumstances he was currently in but I'd like to see him more in action and actually using them*.

So basically he snaches them from his belt. Destroys them and-

Voilà, the Quirk is out.🎊

5min limit doesn't mean anything to him if he can use 4 different Quirks in 20min. However, he needs to use them very wisely because every Quirk doesn't work the same way and they also have to be suitable for the problem he's facing at that moment. That's where his ability to adapt and manage new situations comes in.

I don't want to exaggerate or anything but I think in terms of intelligence, he comes right after Yaoyoroz because damn, you need to have a top-notch brain for such tricky things.

Too sad that strength plays the leading role in their hero world. If you have power, it doesn't matter how or why you're doing the things you do. As long as you can destroy everything that comes in your way, there's nothing that can stop you from getting what you want which sounds... kinda villainous in a way, don't you think?

Shigaraki is right. The main difference between a hero and a villain is that heroes are fighting for the good and villains for the evil. But the main question remains- are the heroes really good and are the villains really evil? First of all, heroes and villains both came from the same type of society- people, normal civilians.

Becoming a hero or a villain is a choice, not a lifestyle. Heroes are there to protect people and villains are there to harm them. Why? Heroes want to make them feel happy and safe while villains want the opposite. What's the matter with the villains? This-

People are constantly judging and not thinking about the consequences they're causing to others. They always ended up comparing themselves to those who are much more superior and successful, making them building a sense of insecurity and fear.

They were forced to push themselves beyond their limits in order to prove themselves and show how far they can possibly go. They had to let them know that their criticism didn't reach them as they were facing their challenges with anticipation.

They could easily turn villainous but no, they choose to protect those same judging idiots who repeatedly let them down/hurt them/accused them/ignored their efforts, all for the sake of becoming their better selves. By choosing the right path, they already confirmed how strong and capable they are and they'll make exceptional heroes one day. In conclusion, there is no way Monoma will become a villain because he already reached this far and gained other's trust. He made friends who are looking after him. He's already a part of something big which he can't abandon this easily.

BTW

This is the ultimate proof that Monoma isn't entirely obsessed with class a as many think he is. He's simply mad at anyone who's trying to show off class b by stealing their spotlight. His class is the best, try to prove him wrong and he won't give you any piece of mind.

He's so dedicated to his rambling that he doesn't mind Kirishima's friendly exchange with Tetsutetsu in the background. It's clear that the hatred he feels is directed towards Bakugou for obvious reasons. While Monoma is the group's person, Bakugou does everything on his own and hates when someone interfers with his business to the point where he becomes arrogant and rude. I can't recall Monoma being any of it because he only uses people's failures as an example to make them feel bad about themselves and we all know that the truth hurts the most.

I'm not defending him or anything, what he does is certainly not nice, but I want to say that his way of expressing bitterness is much more effective than Bakugou's because he makes sense at some point. Bakugou just acts like a thug.

And while he certainly does behave like an absolute madman, I'll still love Bakugou and Monoma equally because there's that one thing Monoma doesn't really understand about Bakugou's personality and that's his undying wish of becoming no.1 world's greatest hero. It's his ambition from an young age which pushed him further into accomplishing his goals. Yes it sounds selfish and yes it seems like he doesn't give a damn about others, but that's his lifelong dream which he can't give up to a friend just for the sake of being nice to each other.

From the flashbacks of the kindergarten we could see how many expectations and how much pressure people were putting on him because of his talent. His mom accused him of being weak and causing trouble for the entire U. A. when in fact, the school was guilty of his kidnapping and took responsibility for it's mistakes. He was raised to solve his problems through violence, he doesn't know for any other way. So it's not arrogance, he's just ambitious but shows it in a rearher inappropriate manner.

Monoma doesn't like that and I can understand why. Unlike Bakugou, Monoma is an underdog. No one ever cheered for him or supported his goals. When he saw Bakugou and his indifference or rather ignorance towards his audience, he thought he was acting ungrateful and that pissed him off. Especially because Monoma is the most grateful out of all the characters.

He wants to be recognized among the crowd and accepted by his peers by means of finding a place where he truly belongs, something he couldn't achieve when he was little. Bakugou doesn't yearn for fame or money. He wants to prove himself and push his limits because winning is what heroes do. Their life goals are different but their ways of dealing with things are surprisingly similar. They're throwing shade wherever they go and they're incredibly noisy, with Bakugou spreading insults and Monoma mocking every living soul but that's the way they are and people grew accustomed to it.

I mean look at this-

Similarities:

blond

smart

rude

sad

sarcastic

uncomfortable

embarrassed

In conclusion:

They share the same level of bitterness + their friends(Tetsu and Kiri) are also very good friends which indicates their similar tastes in people they appreciate.

Also something from Noragami:

"YOU HATE THOSE THE MOST LIKE YOURSELF"

Tbh if bnha was all about class 1b, Monoma would be, in fact, favorable because everyone would have a bad impression of class 1a for being rude and arrogant thanks to Bakugo since we'd only see 1b's side of the story. And although everyone made friends with each other and now are staying on good terms, they're still having this sort of rivalry between them which is completely normal considering the fact that 1a still precedes in particular aspects.

Despite this friendship, Monoma does not believe them in a slightest. He looks at their relationship in a way that class 1a uses their friendship to distract them from trying to be better than them. If you are in good relations with someone, it is natural that you will go easy on them because of the empathy we feel towards others. He thinks they're playing them in order to get what they want. It affects their reputation as a hero and class 1a represents their concurrency so it isn't all about some friendship between kids, it's their future and their careers that get affected as well.

But then again, Monoma isn't fighting for his own selfish purposes, he's doing it for his class. He loves his class from the bottom of his heart and he wants them to succeed, that's why he's so annoying. Class 1a represents their concurrency, they're taking away their spotlight. They're limiting their chances of becoming pro heroes while class 1b is so much better than them and that's what actually bugs Monoma.

They’ve worked just as hard as class 1a, they’ve overcome all the same scholastic obstacles and yet it’s always 1a on the news, 1a in the papers, 1a surviving yet another dramatic and utterly glamorous supervillain encounter. See, 1a gets all the luck.

If he was selfish, narcissistic and egoistic, he'd constantly complain about deserving his place among the best in class 1a but no, he's proud to be with his friends because b class is all about solidarity and teamwork. His class loves him and he's getting along with everyone just fine. His cooperation stats are 4/5, he's a very friendly person.

His intelligence and tactics stats are 5/5, he's a smart person and he obviously doesn't do shit without a reason. His power and speed stats are 1/5, he's weak and very insecure in himself. Naturally he would develop a inferiority complex to protect himself but at the same time trash talks himself to talk up his class which I find very funny and kinda sympathetic in a way.

I bet everyone's just seeing this annoying side of him but there's so much more to his character and Kendou understands that all too well. That's why they're never arguing or fighting for their own beliefs because she knows how much he's hurting. And it's not just him, most of his classmates are also having a sort of rivalry with class 1a but they're being less obvious about it.

Seing this side of him made me start to really like him. He's a sad character with a great desire to belong somewhere and that's probably the reason why I can't possibly hate him. That's just my opinion but I hope others can relate as well. ❤️❤️❤️

[agirlinjapan]

Red Data Girl: My Wish on the Night of the Shooting Stars (Week 6)

Red Data Girl: My Wish on the Night of the Shooting Stars By Noriko Ogiwara A Translation

Miss the last piece? Read it here!

Check out the RDG Translation twitter!

Help me pay for my next translation project on Ko-fi.

For a four day week, this week sure went on for a long time. Thank goodness for the weekend. I’m feeling (mostly) rested up and ready to take on Monday. The book fair also starts on Wednesday, which I think everyone’s excited about. I know I am.

Enjoy this week’s RDG!

Red Data Girl: My Wish on the Night of the Shooting Stars By Noriko Ogiwara Chapter 1: Disappearance Part 3 (2 of 3)

Having been built on a previously wooded slope, Houjou Academy’s campus was hilly. The main sports grounds, library, and a few other buildings stood at a higher elevation than other buildings on the property, located on the upper portion of the main path which wound through campus. The barn and horse ring were even further up the hill than that.

Izumiko had calmed down by the time she, Mayura, Manatsu, and Miyuki reached the thicket of trees growing not far from the horse ring. They arrived at the ring itself after the riding club had already left. The space was empty and silent. With Izumiko’s withdrawn temperament, she did not find empty, shaded places unpleasant. The twilight wrapped gently around her, and there were already one or two stars visible in the reddish light remaining from the day.

It was probably the little signs here and there showing that the horses were contentedly back in their stable which comforted Izumiko. The crisp breeze gave the feeling that autumn was soon to arrive.

For a minute, the four stood still as they took in their surroundings and tried to sense the change Manatsu had described.

“Hey,” Manatsu said, breaking through the moment. “You feel it, don’t you?”

The remaining three turned their faces towards him. However, none of their expressions suggested that they felt the same thing he did.

Mayura’s eyebrows creased as she said, “I can sense that something’s changed, but it feels right. It’s completely different from the strange feeling that was here before the festival. But, does it feel like Izumiko? What do you think, Izumiko?”

“Um. It’s supposed to feel like me, so I don’t really know,” she responded, uncertain. She had sometimes wondered what her magic felt like to others, but the thoughts always left her feeling awkward and self-conscious. She felt her face growing red now. “What do you think, Sagara?”

Miyuki did not answer right away, but eventually he opened his mouth and replied, “Don’t expect me to play the wild child like Mantsu is. He’s the one with the sixth sense. I can answer you through logic and ideas, though. On that last day of the festival, Izumiko was able to disappear from around here into an alternate dimension like the one in Togakushi, and then come back when she changed her mind. I doubt we’d be able to get back to that same place she was then. I think Izumiko and the land here have formed some kind of connection.”

“Like the connection Masumi and Mt. Togakushi have?” Mayura asked. “But if you consider that idea, Izumiko already has Mt. Tamakura.”

At her words, Miyuki hesitated for a moment, but then continued speaking. “One of the reasons why Houjou Academy collected students with spiritual abilities was to test those abilities all in one place, right? The question is whether or not those abilities only manifest themselves here in this specific area, or if they would appear anywhere in Japan. Going off of that, would they only appear in Japan, or would they make themselves known oversees, too? Basically, this is a question of whether or not someone is really worthy of being called a World Heritage Candidate.”

“Sagara, where are you getting this idea?” Mayura asked sharply.

His response was short. “My father.”

“Right. So it’s something the ascetic monks know…”

So that’s what Miyuki and Mr. Sagara were talking about…

Izumiko thought about this silently. Yukimasa had said something similar to her, as well. However, at the time, she hadn’t thought it had anything to do with her.

Manatsu looked towards Izumiko, and said, “The horses are back to being their normal, happy selves. I think it’s a good thing that you came out on top and not that idiot in a white hakama. Masumi and I have a good feeling—Maybe Takayanagi committed suicide or something.”

“Don’t say that,” Miyuki said roughly. “You and your siblings need to police what the three of you say and do. If you can’t keep yourselves from running out of control, someone else is going to do it for you. Don’t forget what you went through last summer.”

“Jeez, you hold a grudge, Sagara.” Mayura’s tone was teasing, but then it turned serious as she pushed her hair away from her shoulder to behind her ear saying, “But I understand. Izumiko was chosen as the student with the most magical ability. That was the shadow president’s decision. It’s clear to see now. I wasn’t chosen, and I admit that Manatsu and I might get insecure about our abilities because of that. But seeing as it was Izumiko who beat me, I’m not that upset. If Takayanagi had been chosen, I think I’d still be kicking and screaming, though.”

“But we don’t actually know if Hodaka’s said anything yet,” Izumiko said quickly. “And I really am insecure, and not special at all. I really can’t control my abilities, and I have absolutely no idea what will happen each time I do use them.”

“That’s what you say, but there’s a vessel inside you,” Mayura said. “You’re the sort of person who will go all over this whole world, contributing to everything and everyone. That’s what it means to be the World Heritage Candidate.”

Izumiko pressed her lips together and shook her head. “No, you’re wrong. I can’t be the world heritage candidate.”

Miyuki took a deep, long breath and then opened his mouth. “It seems like there’s something we need to tell you,” he said, looking towards Mayura and Manatsu. “It’s about something the only goddess knows about in the future.”

When Izumiko didn’t protest, he began to explain. Through Miyuki’s straight forward explanation, the Souda siblings learned about the future destruction of mankind which the goddess had warned him about. Hearing that Izumiko was the key person in all of this—that not changing her future was the secret to preventing that destruction—left them speechless for some time.

Finally, still looking confused, Mayura spoke up. “I’m sorry. Right now, this is all just a little hard to believe… It all came up out of nowhere.”

Manatsu only nodded. “So that’s Izumiko’s actual story, huh?”

This might have been Mayura and Miyuki’s reaction, but Miyuki and Izumiko were not disappointed by it. They both knew that if they had been the ones hearing the story, they would have felt the same way.

“There’s no point in just telling you to believe it,” Miyuki admitted. “You’ve never met the goddess, so obviously none of this would sound possible to you. However, Izumiko and I know that the goddess is real so we have to believe her prophecy.”

He continued in a softer voice. “The ascetic monks’ ultimate goal is to keep this destruction from happening. It’s the whole reason the order was formed. They receive power from the goddess and then work toward her goal.”

Manatsu scratched at his short hair with one hand. “That’s a lot different from our parents—isn’t it? I think I understand why Masumi likes you a little better than I did before, Izumiko. Still, it’s a little hard to imagine you destroying so many people.”

“I can’t imagine it either,” Izumiko said apologetically. “But I have a feeling that being chosen at the school as the World Heritage Candidate is bringing us closer to the future the goddess was talking about. I want to get as far away from that possibility as I can. Besides, I’ve never liked attention.”

Mayura nodded slowly. “I understand why you’re not happy that you’ve been chosen. But beyond that, you two have helped us triplets out even when you didn’t know much about us. So now it’s our turn to help you.”  

The sky had gone completely dark by then, adding to the finality of Mayura’s words. They couldn’t say that they had discussed everything that they wanted to, but the day had come to an end, and they needed to go back down the hill for dinner.

Once they were in the cafeteria, they couldn’t talk as a group, at least not about what was on their mind. The four went in search of a table. When they did eventually find space, it was with students they didn’t normally speak with.

However, seeing as Mayura and Miyuki were both high-scoring, sociable students, they made a good cover for Izumiko and Manatsu who weren’t. There was no awkwardness as Mayura and Miyuki greeted the rest of the table and were quickly pulled into discussions by more and more students, many of which mentioned the fact that they hadn’t seen them over the days off.

There was no real reason for Manatsu and Izumiko to join the conversation along with their more social friends, but Manatsu’s frank way of speaking and behaving made him popular around the table. He had always been popular with others. It was something Izumiko was used to. But that evening in particular, it felt as if there were an awful lot of students around him.

As all the students chatted noisily with the others around them, Izumiko hardly opened her mouth to say a word. She tried her best to join the conversations and smile, but, as always, she didn’t stand out among her friends, and for some reason, she couldn’t calm herself that evening.

There are so many people we don’t know here…

Eventually, Manatsu grew tired of the conversations at the table and artfully excused himself. Mayura and Miyuki still looked perfectly comfortable chatting with the people around them. Today though, Izumiko decided to follow Manatsu’s lead and left her seat, almost as if she were escaping.

When she got back to her room in the girls’ dorm, she let out a sigh of relief. She had secluded herself here all day, but now that felt like it had been ages ago. At this point, the worry she had felt over Miyuki’s disappearance was gone, but it had already been replaced by a new concern.

Even though Miyuki’s back safe and sound, things still haven’t gone back to the way they were before. The mess I made during the school festival has only gotten bigger…    

She had a lot to think about, but she had no idea where to start thinking.

At a loss, Izumiko sat down at her desk, and casually pulled her laptop out of its case. As she opened it, she noticed the mail icon on the screen. Remembering the emails she had sent out that morning, she instantly grew embarrassed.

They were probably wondering why I was so upset. I bet the email’s from Sawa…

When she clicked on the icon though, it was not Sawa’s response that she found, but the furthest person from the situation who lived in California—Daisei.

Why did I get a response from Dad of all people? Izumiko wondered, thinking it strange.

Still, it was clearly a response to her message.

Izumiko,

Thank you for your email. It made me happy.

I want to say that you don’t have to worry about Miyuki, but you probably know that by now already.

However, the email you sent wasn’t for nothing. I’m relieved to see that I finally have a way to stay in contact with you.

When you were still in middle school, do you remember that one time you were able to contact me over the computer? After that, I put a lot of thought into whether or not we’d be able to do it again.

I made your laptop especially for you to use. As you’ve most likely discovered, it won’t work for other people. Not only can you use it to confidently send emails, but you should be able to video chat as well.

Try it out. I’ll be around right at 9PM Japan time. If you’re free at that time too, want to contact me?

If things work out and we can talk, I promise to answer any questions you have.

Daisei

Keep reading!

[mrsspidermanmaryjanewatsonparker]

Mary Jane is NOT Spider-Man’s ‘One true love’!!!!!

...because there is no such thing as ‘one true love’.

That’s a childish fairy tale that Hollywood and older romance stories like to push.

In real life people can love more than one person and do so to different degrees and different ways, even romantically speaking.

Can you romantically love someone more than someone else?

Yes.

Did Spider-Man love MJ more than anyone else?

Yes, endless evidence exists in the comics to prove that.

But she isn’t his one true love and as a hyper anal Spider-Man fan who’s worked on some officially licenced guide book material for Spider-Man/Marvel I can 99% guarantee you that there has never been a comic book ever claiming that!

What MJ is is nothing more and nothing less than the single best love interest Spider-Man could ever have and if you’ve read 616 Spider-Man comics, paid attention and know of the creative impetus behind the characters and the franchise you’d appreciate this.

There are a lot of ways to articulate the core concept of Spider-Man but one of the ways I am fond of is to say that the core concept is a relatively realistic down to Earth guy juggling the responsibilities of life against the responsibility of being a hero.

Realism+Responsibility.

Mary Jane is someone who’s had to deal with issues of responsibility as she ran away from them for the longest time and she ran away because she saw how adopting them came at a huge cost to her family members.

She was irresponsible precisely because she was afraid of being responsible, of the cost it would bear.

Peter on the flipside is a man who saw the cost of not being responsible and thus dedicated himself to BEING responsible. But he too feels the cost of that decision too.

In this sense they are connected through the theme of responsibility, the thing fundamental to Spider-Man since the very start.

And MJ knows what it is like to live with a double identity as Peter did as she developed a way to hide her pain and shield herself from being close to people via a persona of a carefree party girl.

Peter meanwhile developed a persona as a carefree adventurer also to protect himself but from physical threats not emotional ones.

The cost of developing and maintaining these double identities served to isolate Peter and MJ both to a big extent.

But then they were honest about their true selves in one another’s company and vowed to maintain one another’s confidence. 

And suddenly they weren’t so isolated anymore.

Are these two people ‘made’ for each other?

One another’s ‘one true loves’?

Soul mates?

No.

They are two compatible people who grew together, were changed by one another and got to a place of honesty from which they could further grow together and positively impact upon one another.

Just like in real life.

Realism, another key theme of Spider-Man since day 1.

Realism+Responsibility.

Instead of gaudy romances between hyper fantastical costumed characters like Spider-Man and Black Cat or Superman and Wonder Woman, Peter and MJ presented a more realistic, emotionally engaging and ultimately endlessly substance based romance.

And that  is why she is the best Spider-Man love interest.

She is the best because she isn’t a star crossed soul mate forged of destiny and the connected through a mutual fantastical life style. 

Or she is the one true woman for Spider-Man precisly because she isn’t  his one true love.

[firefliesinthenightsky]

CHAPTER 3

26th July, 2020.

05:00 pm.

Delhi.

FRIENDS WHO BECAME FAMILY

16th June, 2018.

10:00 am.

Bangalore.

A month passed. Initially, I was treated as the ultimate “outsider”. No, they were friendly, but maybe it was my resting bitch face, or the fact that I was never the one to initiate a conversation, or the one who’d laugh uselessly at lame jokes, unless I actually found them funny - I was treated as this superficial girl from Delhi who has her own air, doesn’t talk to females (though I barely spoke to men either, unless they spoke to me) and is a complete bitch.

I didn’t make efforts too. Just, me being me. I would seldom have conversations with Mario, and that was it. But, as they say, destiny brings people in our lives unexpectedly. If we’re meant to cross paths, we do. Some stay, some leave, some become close friends. Some, family. That’s exactly what happened.

After Mario, the second friend I made in my class was Jayant. A Bengali guy from Delhi. And because of the same place we hailed from, there was an instant connection. I found myself lucky to have at least found somebody who knew what missing Delhi in Bangalore feels like. Though Jayant had been in Bangalore for quite a few years now, working in a journalism firm, still, the feeling was relatable.

One of the lunch breaks in the first week in college, I was sitting apart working on some assignments while I sipped my juice, while the other girls sat in a circle talking about something I had no clue about. They called, but I didn’t feel much like myself around there and so, politely had my way out.

I tried to apply some brains into this Information Technology assignment ( I’ve always been a tech virgin) when I see a palm before my eyes, out for a handshake, and a voice calls, “Hey, I’m Ananth”.

“Hi, I’m Ayushi”, I said with a faint smile. That marked the start of a friendship that I was to cherish for a lifetime. We had a small talk, and I learnt he belonged to Chennai, and had come to Christ, after a considerable work experience. Something which was an asset. Enough for freshers like us around, to consider him as somebody from another planet altogether, who’d have the magic key to all assignments, by default. And so, it happened. He carried the magic key all through the two years, being far ahead of the times, when it came to any technicalities of the course. Besides that, he went on to become of the closest friends I made in Bangalore.

The bell rang, and the next professor who came asked us to do the most dreaded thing at the time. Introduce ourselves, and then talk about ourselves for a few minutes. The average age of the class would have been around twenty three, and yet talking about ourselves seemed like manual labour. As everybody struggled to think about things to speak about themselves, I realised how little we knew our own selves. We barely knew our hobbies, likes and dislikes, or maybe just never gave enough attention to ourselves. “Such shallow times we lived in”, I thought. After a torturous one hour session, as we moved out for lunch, I stayed back, hoping for the way to clear out before I’d move.

As I looked around, I saw this man, with a sharp jawline, and the expression of a child who’d be beaten and sent to school. It was embarrassing when he looked up just that moment and saw me looking at him. I passed a friendly, rather nervous smile and started preparing to leave for lunch.

“Hey! You’re Ayushi, right?” It was Rishav, as I reached the door.

“Yes,” I smiled.

“You’re from Delhi?”

“Yes, how’d you know?” I said, feeling how stupid that was, the instant I asked that.

“I heard you say that while you introduced yourself.”

“And you’re from Assam?”

“Yeah.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, why do you have that cranky look as if somebody stole your lunch?” I laughed as I asked.

“I just hate being around, I don’t know what am I doing in a B-school anyway!” He sulked.

And just like that, before we knew it, we started speaking. It was comfortable. Instantly. That comfort I felt with him in our first conversation, remained unchanged in all ups and downs in the years to unfold. Maybe that’s how it is with friends, who’d later turn out to be your closest confidant. We would quarrel like cats and dogs, but when I cried, the first face I saw was his.

Then I came across Anish. The Tulu guy who would usually wear funny looking shirts to college, sometimes with stars and moon printed on it and other times some funny looking birds. He would make everybody laugh, as soon as he opened his mouth to speak something. The weirdest guy in the whole wide world. Somebody I never thought I’d even ever make friends with, in my entire life, but I grew to love later. My best friend, my gossip partner, my venting machine, and the closest thing I had to family. We’d spend hours smoking up, discussing who the hottest guy in college was, who’s the nastiest bitch around, who dumped who already, and what not. From the cosmic space to the cats who’d litter his house, we’d gossip about everything, without a single dull moment. Even silence was comfortable with him around.

Overtime, I made friends with the Mallu gang in my class – Hari and Arun precisely. There were others too, but these were the ones, who’d later be added in the list of closest friends. We shared a strong bond of friendship, which made a totally unknown place that I had gone to, feel like home. It felt like I’d known them forever.

Some other friends I made in that class were Shekhar, a quiet guy with a constant smile on his face, and Chandana, one of the most intelligent people around. Both of them had a great role to play in my life, as a constant support system, in my two years in Christ. Jayant left college a while later. He had got an opportunity to pursue a journalism course, one that he had always wished for, in one of the best colleges in Delhi. A few weeks after he had received the news, he was gone. Though I shared a brief time with him, I cherish it till date, and always will.

Sometime later, around August, I moved in, into a three room apartment with two other Telugu girls from my class, Nikitha and Tejaswi, who had turned out to be really good friends by that time. Initially, I had preferred staying alone, but since my mother insisted I should stay with somebody who is aware of the languages of the region, and also since Tejaswi was looking for a house as well, we decided we’d move in together. Nikitha moved in a couple of weeks later. Tejaswi did not seem really happy about a third person moving in at first, as the space was just right for the two of us and we had decided to use the third room as the guest room, but since Nikitha was urgently looking for a place and I really wanted to help, I persuaded Tejaswi somehow. She was kind enough to finally agree.

All these people were my solace in the new city I knew nothing about. We shared some amazing times. The assignments, the last minute exam anxiety, and the chill weekends which followed, teasing each other till they cried and falling off the bed, laughing, till our stomachs hurt, it was an exciting and yet a peaceful world of its own, with friends that became family. A family that I’d cherish for life!

[merryfortune]

Through the Forest and the Night, We Find Our Courage

Commissioned fic for @colorfulwatcher

Ko-fi

 There are many stories of regarding the deepest parts of XYZ Forest where only the brave and strong are permitted to tread there as those who are weak often fall prey to a good many horrors. Sayaka was more than familiar with these stories. All her friends had a fascination with them and her parents used them to instil a healthy sense of caution in her but now, she was about to do something very, very silly.

  Though the stories have too many gruesome details to share, the deepest parts of XYZ Forest remain quite popular presumably because they were so dark and mysterious. In Sayaka’s age group, among the fae and other monsters of the outskirts of the forest, there is a culture Sayaka detests, or perhaps it is more a game. Either way, Sayaka has been selected to participate in the next foolhardy round of it. It is something like a challenge of courage to prove something and gain a little bit of reputation.

  Usually, Sayaka would just say “no” but this time was different. She was feeling antsy and bold. She had been trying to build confidence as of late and even just a short fly through the deeper parts of the Forest would be more than enough to bolster her self-esteem and perhaps even her reputation. Besides, the route everyone before her was well mapped and generally safe so Sayaka decided to throw caution to the wind.

  Allen had been certain she would chicken out by the time twilight came but no, Sayaka remained. She shivered as a cold wind passed through. Allen was proud of her though.

  “Are you going to be right?” he asked.

  “Ruri’s waiting on the other side, isn’t she? I told her if I take more than two hours, she has to come find me.” Sayaka said.

  “Wow, you’re really serious about this.”

  There were stars in Allen’s eyes, he whistled. Sayaka smiled sheepishly.

  “I’m sick of being a coward. I want people to take me seriously. If this is the best way, it’s the best way.” Sayaka replied.

  Allen beamed. “I’m so proud of you! Don’t you worry, nothing will go wrong. None of the hot-shots visit the area often so we’re right to run Challenges of Courage.” He gave her the thumbs up. “If something goes wrong, my keen ears’ll hear ya and I’ll come runnin’.”

  Allen’s ears flicked. They became pert for a moment then rested. It was cute how puppy-like he looked.

  “Thanks, Allen.” Sayaka replied.

  “C’mon, off ya go. I’ll cheer for you.” Allen said. He flashed a toothy grin and his tail began to wag.

  “Y-Yep.” Sayaka stuttered.

  Sayaka lifted her head and through the verdant canopy of the tick trees, she saw a few glimmering stars. The wind continued to whisper behind her: whisper of all the tragedies that had supposedly taken place in the deepest parts of the forest. She shivered but she refused to bow to her weakening resolve. She wanted to change and this was how she was going to.

  Her wings lifted up and unfurled. Allen whooped and hollered. Sayaka took a deep breath and her knees plunged downwards. She leapt into the air and the wind accepted her into its midst. She didn’t look back as she flew forward; sailing with the winds.

  “You can do it, Sayaka!” Allen shouted.

  “Thank you!” she called back but she did not look back.

  Sayaka flew deeper into the forest. The branches swayed and the wind’s voice, once melodic became miserable, and her skin prickled. She was terrified and regretful but she clutched onto her decision to become stronger. She wanted to become someone who was able to be courageous and this was her coming-of-age as silly and terrifying as it was.

  The deeper parts of the forest had trees unlike anything else. They were huge and thick with sprawling roots that crashed into one another. The moss here seemed to glow and there were plenty of cries from unknown animals which Sayaka could not identify. Moreover, it was colder here than anywhere else; even on the tricky cusp. It is not the forest itself that’s truly scary but rather the inhabitants.

  She can’t imagine the sorts of creatures who make their homes among the forest as she flies over it. She ducks around gnarled branches and trees that seem to watch her. As she travels further into the forest, further away from safety, every noise becomes amplified in her head. The simple croaking of a frog becomes something far more booming but the silence is far scarier.

  Here, only the strongest of the strong can stay. These champions of their kind defend their territory mercilessly and have no patience for the likes of those who play over prey. Or so Sayaka hears and everything she hears must be true.

  She can’t imagine the sorts of creatures who make their homes among the forest as she flies over it. She ducks around gnarled branches and trees that seem to watch her. As she travels further into the forest, further away from safety, every noise becomes amplified in her head. The simple croaking of a frog becomes something far more booming but the silence is far scarier.

  There is this one story that harrows her far more than any other. They say there is a hunter in these forests whose breath reeks of poison. They say he is silent in his watchful wait for prey and vicious upon seeking his target. They say he toys with his prey and laughs before their destruction. His victims aren’t even left with a scant trace of their former selves in this world. They call this hunter, this predator, the Starve Venom Dragon and supposedly, he does not kill for the feed but rather, he kills for the thrill. How horrible.

  Sayaka couldn’t think of anything more cruel than senseless, brutal killing. She wishes though that she could think of something else other than that. Out of all the stories in her head, it is the story of the Starve Venom Dragon that refuses to leave her mind. She’s scaring herself more than the forest was scaring her.

  Every glowy speck in the distance became the waiting eyes of that terrible monster. However, there was comfort in knowing that every noise was an indicator of safety. Sayaka continued to travel through the forest with short flaps of her wings followed by a little bit of rest and a scan of her surroundings. So long as she was safe, that’s all that mattered even if her nerves jittered.

  At one such rest stop, Sayaka sat down. Her heart raced. She placed her hand over her breast and could feel her warm blood beneath her fingertips. She sighed.

  “Why am I doing this?” she questioned herself as her shoulders drooped.

  Every moment of this journey had been terribly scary. Sayaka was fit to burst into tears but her exhaustion was the only thing stopping such a thing. Sayaka was unused to making such long journeys. Fae like herself were more attuned to pleasure and leisure, slothfully lounging around and making jokes and eating cakes. Long flights like these were the realms of birds and their kin.

  Sayaka took another breath. She was unsteady on her feet as she stood up. She glanced around and a creeping fear spread through her. No, that couldn’t be right, she thought to herself. She glanced around and strained her ears. She swallowed.

  Silence.

  There was also an absence of glowy specks. No, this couldn’t be right. Fear froze her and she tried to look through the darkness: nothing but murky, blobby shapes she could not identify further than “probably a tree”. Her knees grew weak and her palms sweated. Her wings twitched.

  Laughter. The breaking of silence.

  “And what would a girl like you be doing here?” a cold, chilling voice cut through the laughter.

  Sayaka turned around. “I-I’m…” Her words failed her.

  More laughter. Deranged and eerie: it clung to the air and to Sayaka’s skin. It was so close. Too close!

  Sayaka turned around again and her shoulders grew stiff but her voice boomed: “Leave me alone!”

  She quaked in her little, leafy boots.

  “Oh, I see, little, scared fairy trying to do one of those… challenges.”

  Sayaka nodded.

  “This my territory, fly. And you’re disappearance will serve as a warning to all those other pesky bugs who want to swarm through.”

  Sayaka’s eyes closed tight. Of course, of course, she would be the one to incur the wrath of the Starve Venom Dragon.

  “Wrong, you overgrown lizard!” a second voice cut through the darkness.

  Sayaka opened her eyes. She felt as though she could trust this voice. She looked around and the Starve Venom Dragon looked about to pounce upon her: his eyes alight and his claws reflecting it but he looked drained of colour in the face. She looked around and then, the flutter of feathers caught her eye.

  Descending from above came a figure she’d never seen before. She had however heard of such a creature: a harpy, like Ruri, but he was far more bestial and battle-scarred. His wings were of an unfathomable wingspan and his claws were like sickles. Though he appeared like a terror of the night, he was beautiful and he fought on Sayaka’s behalf.

  The Starve Venom Dragon’s claws clashed with the Harpy’s. Wings fluttered and both lunged at each other. Sayaka couldn’t bear to watch. She winced with every chink of their claws grating against one another: it was almost like swordplay.

   “This is my territory, reptile!” the Harpy screeched.

  The forest reverberated in the echo of his voice: calm and cutting.

  The Starve Venom Dragon snarled but ultimately slunk off.

  Sayaka faced the Harpy: he had a sharp face with cold eyes. She averted her gaze and he did the same.

  “I didn’t do this for you.” he told her.

  “I - I understand.” Sayaka stuttered. “I’ll be leaving now.”

  She turned and her wings unfurled.

  “Wait, don’t go.”

  “Pardon?”

  Sayaka returned to him.

  “I’ll show you the way.” he told her. “I know you… from somewhere. I’m Shun.”

  “Sayaka and thank you for saving me.”

  “Save your thanks for later, until you get out of the dangerous parts of the forest.” he told her.

  “Thank you.” Sayaka replied.

  She felt so small by his side. She felt that way next to most people but next to him, she felt even smaller. His flight guided her through the forest. Beneath his wingspan, Sayaka felt safe. Even warm. She kept hazarding glances at him.

  He was… handsome.

  She wondered why he felt as though he knew her. Sayaka would most certainly remember meeting a creature like him but… no one would remember meeting someone as insignificant as her.

  By his lead, they flew for perhaps an hour and the light of the moon and stars grew stronger. Branches began to recede and they were brought to the edge of the forest. Shun kept himself scarce as Sayaka pushed forward. She paused.

  “Thank you.”

  “It’s nothing.” he muttered.

  “Will I see you again?” she asked.

  A wolf - no, Allen - howled in the near distance.

  Another voice entered the air: “Sayaka!” she called out. “Wait, is that… Older Brother?”

  Shun was startled by the claim. Sayaka recognised that second voice as Ruri’s. Soon enough, Ruri and Allen had drawn in closer. Shun’s face went a little red.

  “Is Ruri… your sister?” Sayaka asked.

  “Sort of. I took care of her when she was younger.” Shun explained.

  “It’s been so long, Older Brother.” Ruri huffed. “Now that you’re a “big, bad protector of the XZY Forest”, we hardly see each other.”

  Sayaka giggled. “Shun, would you like to join us for the rest of the night?”

  Shun half smiled for the briefest moment. Sayaka’s heart fluttered. Ruri shot Allen a knowing smile. Allen was confused by this.

  “Yes. I would like that.” Shun admitted.

  Sayaka grinned. She felt as though she could melt from happiness. Was this infatuation settling in her heart or something else?

  Only time would tell but for now, she would cherish the rest of the night in the hopes of finding out.