thedaveandkimmershow

[thedaveandkimmershow]

Susan would've laughed.

You see, when she was alive she was a huge Harry Potter fan. One of those who read the entire book series plenty of times and watched the movies a number of times to match.

As for us, Harry Potter was never our thing. We tried reading the first book together but it never took. Then later we watched the first movie then the second movie but didn't see what all the fuss was about.

Then in 2022, Susan died.

As part of our process of dealing with her passing, with our loss, we took a family trip to the Disney places Susan loved and we visited the Harry Potter places Susan would've loved but couldn't go because of her limited mobility.

To prepare for the Harry Potter experience, Kimmer suggested we bite the bullet and watch all eight movies so we at least understood what we were experiencing at the theme park. And then we actually went to Diagon Alley at the theme park.

And then we were hooked.

Since then, we watched all eight movies another four times.

At least.

We returned to Diagon Alley two more times and expanded the experience with a pair of visits to Hogsmeade that's connected to Diagon Alley by the Hogwarts Express that we also rode twice.

And so on.

Yeah.

We are hooked.

Over the years, the movies streamed from Netflix to Peacock to Max. We no longer have access to the movies but, as we were taking stock of our Christmas shows on DVD last month, we noticed three DVDs—three movies from the franchise—numbers two, three, and four. Once upon a time, they belonged to Susan. Now they are among the many reminders of her we keep in our possession. 

So we watched two, three, and four. Then we went thrift shopping and scored numbers one and five. Since five was technically next up, we started watching it, "Harry Potter & the Order of the Phoenix". We watched it until it wouldn't play further. Seriously. It plays to a certain point in the movie, the end of that particular DVD chapter, I'm thinking, and then the screen goes black. I can't even use the chapter menu to jump passed that point on the disc.

Okay fine.

We've got number one, "Harry Potter & the Philosopher's Stone", and so I popped that into the player.

No dice.

The screen comes up black with a message indicating the movie's been restricted in our region.

Whaaaaaat?

So I look at the DVD cover and there it is. Not a notice of regional restriction but a statement of the disc's video format: PAL.

That's the European video standard, by the way. And since the title for American audiences is "Harry Potter & the Sorcerer's Stone", it's not a stretch to understand that this disc was intended for viewers in England.

Booooooo.

Okay so one further card to play: YouTube. Where I find a playlist for movie number five that includes enough clips taken from that movie, fifty-two I believe, that you can watch probably 90-95% of it starting from clip one and watching all the way to the last clip.

Which we did.

Actually, we watched from where our DVD crapped out... to the end.

Like I said from the start: 

Susan would've laughed.

She was such a huge fan for a long time when we completely weren't.

And now we're going to such lengths and being thwarted at each turn just to continue watching all eight movies that we've already seen.

Like, a bunch of times.

Susan would've been tickled by the delicious irony.

'Cause she was that kind of friend.

😉

[thedaveandkimmershow]

Okay so Thursday night one of the bands in which Linzy performs, Midnight High, performed at Neumos near Seattle U.

The next morning, Friday morning, she's on a plane to San Francisco for a Little Lies performance that's threaded through the live podcast shows You're Wrong About and American Hysteria. The band's gear is packed together and transported separately.

Landing in S.F., now it's directly to the rehearsal space for rehearsal.

Friday evening: settle into the band's Airbnb.

The next day, Saturday, the first item on the day's agenda is transporting the gear set up in the rehearsal space to the venue. The venue being San Francisco's iconic Palace of Fine Arts.

2pm the band has a tour scheduled of The Record Plant in Sausalito just the other side of the Golden Gate Bridge. This is the record studio where Rumours was recorded. A bit of a Mecca for these members of a Fleetwood Mac tribute band. ☺️

4pm it's back to the Palace of Fine Arts for set-up & soundcheck.

They take the stage at 8.

Sunday evening, Linzy's on a return flight.

Monday, her workweek begins again.

All of which I point out because I thought it was a seriously cool experience back when I traveled on a production crew both nationally and internationally as we shot travel series shows. I loved the travel. I loved the access. I loved being on the road one week, two weeks max. One time for three weeks. I loved the whole schedule and logistics and profession of it.

And I am impressed.

I am impressed to find my daughter, not doing the same thing, but a similar experience that's tied to a live podcast taking to the road... and a band that's gone with them to perform for paying audiences.

One more time:

To perform.

For paying audiences.

I am impressed.

😁

[thedaveandkimmershow]

I don't know what it is… but December seemed to move more slowly even though there was so much in it. Whereas today, January, the New Year, time’s returned to its normal speed.

For sure we entered December on the heels of a triumphant Thanksgiving that managed to balance peace, relaxation, friendship, curiosity, laughter, and one fantastic potluck meal in good measure.  After that, I did a day after black Friday thing and scored the year's Christmas cards. 50% off at Hobby Lobby. And they were wonderfully festive.

Hobby Lobby would feature big in our December 'cause Kimmer's hard at work remodeling the doll house she and her dad made many, many decades ago and once upon a time.

Anyway, by December 1, I began the yearly Christmas card project that involves not only writing to friends and family but also to conduct a review of our year because…

Well, when else are we gonna consider where we’ve been, where we are, and where we're going? It's as good a time as any to step out of the rushing river of our present and just consider for a little bit.

Once I had our year in review down to one page front and back, I created a Dutch translation for  our family members with whom we spent time at the bittersweet start of 2024 that bore witness not only to a family reunion but the passing of my mom’s older brother. Of the four kids in her family, she's now the only one left.

The arrival of December brought with it Christmas movies, classic Christmas TV shows, and, of course, all that Christmas music to blanket the season. Along with several film versions of “A Christmas Carol”, we also indulged the audiobook version narrated by Tim Curry. If you're wondering, aside from the fact that this story is a bona fide Christmas classic, the story of transformation is also a very compelling way of entering into the meaning of Christmas.

Another way, of course, is the traditional Advent calendar. Now, in the week after Christmas 2023, I scored a winter wonderland scene crafted from wood, painted red with white accents, with twenty-four little drawers counting down the days positioned along the edges. I loaded each drawer with two round peppermints in wrappers and a children's verse for each day as the birth of the Christ child approached. 

We got kind of a late start, six or seven days in, but made it up pretty quickly and then we're bummed when we had to throttle back to one drawer a day that was basically a single peppermint each. 😕

On my professional front, I’d been working on a documentary for many months. Not because it actually took that long but because of the client's schedule. We were hoping to bring this one home before the end of the year and on the morning of December 5 it happened. The client needed the finished piece with changes today. Which we accomplished, Ill have you know. Done. Delivered. Approved.

Guaranteed it's being submitted for local Emmy consideration as a doc and as an example of my editing.

Fingers crossed!

December was a fulfilled opportunity to spend quality time with more friends than usual during the month. We had friends over. I joined friends in Bellevue to compare notes with these fellow dads and content creators. Got in a little show ‘n tell and a bit of pondering about the future.

December was also a moment of time in which we continued to miss dear friends and family who were lost to us through the years, all of them prematurely as far as we’re concerned. 

Scott.

Susan.

Jacquie.

Also: Bill, Dave, and Thom.

My old bible school teacher, Mrs. West, from my grade school days, too. The longest, in fact. I still visit her gravesite during the holidays with a poinsettia and a card. Call it my profound appreciation because she invested her time in me when I absolutely didn’t deserve it.

Our season was elevated by nostalgia, tradition, and our own yearly improvisations. I’ve gotta “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” playlist with various covers of the song to which I add another each year. From way back when: “And Suddenly There Was With The Angel” right into “Glory to God” from Handel’s “Messiah”. Never gets old. And then friends over for a Christmas potluck on the 21st, in preparation for which we de-Thanksgiving’d our home, redecorating it both inside and out for Christmas. Then, with our friends at the house, we got a bit of help putting ornaments on the tree from both adult and children’s hands. 🙂

The 21st is when our first round of presents officially turned up under the tree. These were the ones for our friends and their children. At this point in the month, too, there are stashes of presents all around the house for each other, for family, for friends, including a coupla presents I got from friends at work.

As for the rundown on the last of the month:

The 23rd is my birthday that we celebrate with Linzy.

The 24th, Linzy’s also at our place.

The 25th, the three of us are at the theater for a cinematic showing of “Elf” that we’ve never watched in a theater before.

That evening, more friends over at the house as well as another Christmas potluck.

Big hits, these potlucks. :-)

A few days later, the 29th, we’re in Woodinville to hang out with our former youth pastor who’s now sporting a beard and with whom we enjoy an evening at Starbucks.

The next morning we’re on a plane to southern California to celebrate the imminent demise of 2024 and the sudden birth of 2025. The experience is all family, so… chill. A bit like we’re living here a few days. But with actual sunshine!

New Years Eve day we’re in the near desert for a round of tacos and checking in on the home of Kimmer’s aunt and uncle. On our way back, we’re invited to a New Years party which is great ‘cause we actually had no plans. So now it’s a lovely evening with family and friends.

All in all, that was probably the closest we’ve come to nailing December which is always such a potential calamity of restlessness. There’s so much to do you kind of lose yourself in all that activity… just as you lose the season if you’re not careful.

So yeah. This time, we kept our focus and enjoyed the season, our family, our friends. And my hope is that whatever clever magic it was that captured the peace and relationships we shared from the end of November through the end of December, why…

It would be fantastic if our 2025 captured a bit of those as well.

:-)

[thedaveandkimmershow]

On December 30, 2022, we were on a plane to Southern California because we got the middle of the night call from the doctor that Kimmer's uncle just died.

On December 31, 2023, we were on a plane to Amsterdam because that was our last opportunity to see my uncle who was terminal and, you know, any time now.

Both trips were last-minute emergency get on the plane and go trips without knowing exactly what would happen when we landed. We even had to acknowledge the arrival of the New Year, 2024, as we crossed the North Atlantic just south of Greenland.

This year, thank God, we got on a plane with a very basic, intentional agenda: celebrate the New Year with family in Irvine.

Basically, let's live there a few days then come home.

Arriving at Long Beach Airport (our favorite because you deplane onto the tarmac which makes for fantastic pictures), we entered into sunshine and then the enticing smells of the food court they built right across from our boarding gate.

By 'n by, we grabbed our bags then hopped into Kimmer's cousin's truck that zipped us away to the Irvine area where, what the heck, we stopped at the Lazy Dog for a dinner of our already prescribed appetizers: five different plates between the three of us plus drinks all around including the dark, peanut butter flavored stout.

Trust me. The flavor was perfection.

Afterward, we hit our usual Trader Joe's for whatever groceries we needed... then headed to our southern California home base for the next few days.

The next day, New Year's Eve, we determined to head out to Kimmer's aunt and uncle's old home. They passed away last year and the year before, respectively, and their home is admin'd and maintained on location. We collaborate with them and check in ourselves every few.

It's a different experience being there, though. I won't lie. It's less saturate, in a way. More like visiting a historical place where people once lived. You see the remaining evidence of it... but it's not a Technicolor experience. Know what I mean?

Before stopping in, though, after our drive to the near desert, we decided to stop in for tacos at a nearby resort. Street and Birria tacos for us. The Birria tacos, by the way, are a revelation. Crispy. With meat sauce on the side.

This is now my Forever order whenever we're in the neighborhood. ☺️

Later that evening, New Year's Eve, we binge some Wednesday on Netflix episodes until we can't around 11.

No worries, though. At midnight, we hear "Happy New Year!!!" loud 'n clear and then we're asleep again.

I don't know what time we're up on New Year's Day. I will say, though, that it's straight up lazy day. Feels like a normal day only not all the stores are open.

At the point we decide to start the day, we embark on what ends up being a six-mile round trip walk to and from Starbucks with a half-hour planning meeting whilst we sip our drinks.

Later in the day we're off to Sprouts to pick up pizza parts. Whilst there, I check on our next stop, Trader Joe's, that turns out to be closed on New Year's Day.

Like, everywhere.

Back at the homestead, Kimmer makes a flat bread pizza, her cousin makes a crispy crust pizza. Both in the newly rejuvenated gas oven running 400-500 degrees and producing magnificent deliciousness. Pretty fast, I've gotta say.

While we enjoy the pizza, we also watch the movie, "Twisters", sequel to "Twister". It's a fantastic experience due exclusively to the live running commentary by each of us in the room. 🤣🤣🤣 Afterward, I catch a ride with Kimmer's second cousin, his inaugural behind-the-wheel driving an actual passenger after passing his tests and gaining his driver's license the day before we arrived.

We hit the nearby grocery store to pick up ice cream to round out the evening. ☺️

Our final day, the 2nd, it's a lazy day.

A suuuuuuper lazy day.

First off, we wake up with the house to ourselves...

So Kimmer takes a little time out to make her own delicious brand of chocolate chip cookies. A serious batch, by the way.

Around 130 in the afternoon, after most of the packing's done (by Kimmer) it seems time for a break after all the relaxing we did prior to packing... so we gather up Kimmer's second cousin, head out the door, walk down and across the playground, down the street, down through the green belt, and eventually along the major arterial for both hot and cold drinks and just hanging out, relaxing together for a bit.

At Starbucks.

Around a quarter to three, we head back, engrossed in a conversation about what kind of specs should Kimmer's next laptop have given how she uses her current one that's nobody's favorite.

Back at the homestead, she shows her second cousin how she typically runs her laptop while he runs Windows Task Manager and discovers between 63% and 76% of RAM is being used by what she's using and whatever the heck's running in the background.

A little after 4, we throw everything in the truck and head out to Left Coast Beer for dinner, drinks, and honing in on the basic specs of her next laptop: 16 gigs of RAM, an Intel Core i5 processor (at the very least), and an SSD drive. Everything current. Everything new.

515 we continue to John Wayne Airport where we're dropped off on the fly, hugs all around, so that now we're officially on our way home, marking the end of our Christmas season. 😕

Not the end, though. I left out a couple/few details to which I'm circling back now.

For example, binge-watching episodes of Wednesday wasn't the only thing we did on New Year's Eve.

You see, on our way back from Kimmer's aunt's and uncle's old place, her second cousin, in the car with us, receives a text from his best friend's dad wondering if he's good to go for New Year's Eve.

The answer is No. He didn't have plans for New Year's Eve because we didn't have plans for New Year's Eve. We were just gonna have an evening like we have a lot of evenings. And so, a little after six that same night, we're entering a family friend's home, filing in passed a huuuuge dog named Buster who's curious and friendly about us. A little later, a coupla other friends show up and we're having a low-key New Year's Eve party with friends, a roaring fire in the fireplace off the kitchen, grilled bacon cheeseburgers, conversations in the kitchen, dinner and drinks around a large dining room table next to a massive fur tree with a charming Dr. Seuss vibe.

Finally: desserts! ☺️

It was a really lovely evening. One we won't forget because it was so relaxing and fun.

Definitely the best way to complete 2024.

Another detail I hadn't actually got to yet is that it's always interesting to feel out where these trips end. Sometimes there's a sunset at a wine bar as we're waiting on our plane home. Sometimes it's walking through the door of our home to a "Welcome Home" sign made from a Lite Bright set. Sometimes it's a lot of different things. They all have their own feel. They all take place somewhere between somewhere and home.

This time, Kimmer fired up "The Wild Robot" on her Kindle during the first of two flights home. She watched with ear buds. I watched without, electing to go with visuals and captions. I think we got a third of the way through during the first flight. Got through the rest during the second flight and I've gotta say the film is unexpectedly compelling.

For me it was, at least.

We're definitely gonna catch it again in theaters when the movie's re-released on January 17. And then later, months later, on Netflix.

It was genuinely the sweetest, most touching experience.

That second flight, by the way, which was our return home flight, gave us a quite lovely parting gift. At some point I looked up from my book and realized we're flying above/alongside West Seattle at night, gently arcing north then east then south leaving us clearly passing over Climate Pledge Arena at the Seattle Center then suddenly we're above the tallest buildings in downtown Seattle. It's an absolutely stunning view looking almost straight down through our window at the tops of these buildings and the lighted streets in-between. An unexpected treat that we oohed and ahhed over leaning toward the window from our seats.

A few minutes later, we're on the ground.

Home.

Okay last thing.

The photograph that leads this blog post is something I discovered a little before being asked to take a family Christmas photograph for Christmas 2025. This was our friend, the owner of the house, his two kids, and Buster the really REALLY big dog. We had the tiniest bit of fun with poses before the family was properly gathered together next to the Christmas tree in front of the main staircase... and before the shoot officially began.

Before that, though, I was perusing the Christmas decorations in the front lobby when I spotted it.

Smaller in scale than everything else on the cabinet top.

Easily overlooked amidst the more obvious Christmas figures and decorations.

This was a leg atop which was positioned a lamp shade.

That's right.

This was the Major Award made famous by the movie "A Christmas Story".

Call it another tiny surprise amidst a few days of celebrating with friends and family. It's come to represent the spirit of the end of the season. These days in which Christmastime and all the holidays gathered in and around it come to pass... and we find ourselves officially navigating the road that takes us through the New Year.

Onward!

☺️

[thedaveandkimmershow]

It's funny how the 31st is the end of a thing while the 1st is the beginning of a thing. They're just sequential, adjacent days that continue in perpetuity.

And yet.

We not only associate... we package our experiences into given years and consider those years accordingly. How each year is colored from catastrophic to transcendent very much depends on when a year starts and when a year ends.

Ultimately, there's a baked in randomness to the 31st/1st that feels like a big deal but isn't one. The lives we're living are ongoing no matter what. The challenges we face, sure, will contain themselves inside days and weeks and even a single calendar year. But some of those challenges will bleed out beyond the bounds of a single year. Some of those challenges, in fact, can and will bleed out beyond many years. The ends and beginnings of years have no actual bearing on whether or not we overcome those challenges or not.

How we overcome those challenges or not.

Whether a challenge is, in fact, ours...

Or not.

It's very much a feature of our day-to-day that we're faced with challenges from as close up as in your face to global challenges that affect our lives in a wide angle context. And we can't and don't attend to all of those challenges at the same time with the same intention and effort.

We either prioritize the challenges we choose to engage or certain challenges grab our focus and effort without our conscious consent.

Oof.

I think if it as being trapped in the Present.

Or being trapped by the Present.

That's tough to avoid, of course, but in order to use my human super power of executive functioning that can direct my life—both personal and professional—from past through present to future...

I've gotta keep my eye on figuring out the best way for my brain to help me navigate the days, the weeks, the years ahead.

Onward!

[thedaveandkimmershow]

The last week of the year is always an odd one.

Even when we're working and doing our normal life things, it feels like what we're doing, what we're all doing, is running out the clock. Like this part of the year after Christmas Day doesn't count for some weird reason.

My memories even include one year during high school or college when all I did was read the books I got on Christmas morning.

That's my sense of it, anyway. It's probably not true. Most likely not true. But it does color how I think about this final week. Especially since the radio stations abandoned their Christmas music rotations as soon as the 26th arrived like we just returned to our scheduled show in progress.

Only we haven't.

We're waiting for the new show to start.

Even if it's not a new show.

Who are we kidding, though? It's always a new show.

So we're running out the clock. Doing the last things we gotta do 'cause we've been doing 'em and they're in process. Thinking about what's coming 'cause whatever it is... is about to be here.

A lot of what's in front of us we know what it is. We know how it's gonna play. We know what to do.

Beyond that are question marks. Things we can't possibly know or predict that will affect us in some way that we'll have to deal with to some degree.

File this under We'll Deal When We Get There.

Between those two poles—Known and Unknown—there's at least one other: Best Educated Guess.

It's predictions based on available data that allows your decisions to learn more often in the right direction. It's strategic thinking that uncovers lanes/opportunities/choices you can't know for sure are there. It's foresight, experience, wisdom that lets you iterate what's in front of you so you can position yourself to the most likely benefit of yourself, your family, your personal or professional objectives.

It's all in the table, is my point.

What's known.

What's unknown.

And what you can figure out on the fly.

So yeah.

The last week of the year is always an odd one.

Even when we're working and doing our normal life things, it feels like what we're doing, what we're all doing, is running out the clock. Like this part of the year after Christmas Day doesn't count for some weird reason because we're waiting for the new show to start.

Even if it's not a new show.

Who are we kidding, though?

It's always a new show.

[thedaveandkimmershow]

There's a line in a lot of movies that implies that loss is somehow lessened by the knowledge that the person who's been lost remains in here (touches fingers to heart).

I've always looked askance at movie scenes like that, I never bought into the sentiment, and I'm not here to say my attitude has changed. Like, at all.

What I will freely admit, though, is that the experience, after years, after decades, is complicated.

When I was a child, I went to a neighborhood bible club that probably wasn't meant for highly kinetic, ADHD children like me.

I was not an ideal student.

Still, at some point after I aged out, the teacher would walk to my house on my birthday to give me a handwritten card and some slight gift. Later, when she was no longer able to make the walk, I walked over to her place instead. And that's how it was as she grew older and I grew up to the point where we actually got to know one another.

And then she died.

And ever since that loss, on some day during the Christmas season, I show up at her grave site with a Poinsettia and a handwritten card. There's just this connection that's sustained across years then decades. To this day.

That was a student/teacher connection, though. So what happens when it's a friend. Someone with whom you started your career, grew into the professional you've become.

That's our friend, Scott, who died of Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis when we were all starting to head into our thirties. And his death, occurring as we embarked on our careers left a particular scar. You see I work in post production and, as a producer, Scott was always pushing the limits of our technology. And as our technology took off over years, over decades, I would find myself wanting to tell Scott about the latest... or I'd just want to know what he thought about it or what he'd do with it.

And then I'd remember he wasn't there anymore. We couldn't compare notes. We couldn't talk about being dads. We couldn't talk about growing older.

He's wired into me in a way that takes a few beats before I realize he's not here anymore. The experience doesn't involve grief... but it isn't comforting, either.

With our friend, Susan, the experience is even more pronounced. You see, she was our neighbor at the condo at which we lived after we were married. We went through some high drama together with the condo board there that bonded us.

In the last years of her life, she lived in our home and we cared for her, shopped for her, made sure she had everything she needed. She was a serious part of our family. Each day. Every day. And when she was gone, there was an empty space where we'd normally bandy about opinions, where we'd pick up the usual things she needed, where we'd have an experience for sure Susan would love.

So there it was again. Susan was gone and she was still wired into us.

A couple beats later, though, we'd realize she isn't here anymore.

Kimmer's uncle died a couple years ago and the stories we have about him always find a way out from time to time. Kimmer's aunt, who died over a year ago, left a more indelible presence in her wake. Because of that, there are more triggers that invoke memories of her, things she'd do, things she'd say.

Again, none of this invokes grief.

Neither is it comforting, though.

It's both welcome.

And unwelcome.

These are memories that evoke lovely, comforting, humorous moments and experiences and stories. Until we're reminded of our loss. Until we're reminded that these memories belong to someone who's not here anymore and, in some cases, they've been gone for quite some time now.

So yeah. The idea of a lost loved one being in here (places fingers to heart) is a complicated experience in practice. Because my brain is wired by their presence in my life. And that wiring doesn't change because they're gone. In a way, to my mind, there is no difference between the thoughts or memories or expressions of a dear friend or relative who's alive in the world...

And one who isn't.

The thoughts are triggered regardless.

And we remain wired as if they're still here.

:-(

[thedaveandkimmershow]

Once upon a time we bought each other different kinds of gifts from different kinds of places.

Kimmer brought this up the other day because it's very much true. On our original lists of gifts we bought each other were cassette tapes, compact discs, VHS tapes, DVDs, and books you actually hold in your hand. The other major difference is that Amazon didn't exist at the time so everything was stored bought. That actually lasted 'til the pandemic when our habits changed overnight.

We actually used to shop at Alderwood Mall. I even did all my last-minute Christmas shopping for Kimmer there once without any kind of clue as to what I was gonna buy.

That was the last time I ever did that, by the way, because it's an expensive exercise in shopping and it's a bit of a thoughtless process. It's just buy buy buy.

That might've been the last time, in fact, that I shopped at the mall for Christmas.

Definitely, the biggest, earliest pivot we made was from retail to thrift. We eventually abandoned the mall and go-to places like Target for GoodWill, Value Village, and Half-Price Books where we could buy each other not only books but CDs and DVDs.

But then streaming. And YouTube.

And the only reason for CDs is if they're rock classics from our high school years. The only reason for DVDs is if the film or series isn't streaming anywhere (I'm lookin' at YOU BBC Ghosts). And then the only reason for books, well...

Kimmer's fully pivoted to Audible. And for me, instead of books she usually slips me a gift card so I can choose which book from my personal list is gonna be next for purchase. Even then, though, they're specific books I'm chasing and it's faster to order online even if it's HalfPriceBooks.com.

Still, in many ways we are more creative in the gifts we give each other. Some gifts, of course, are classics and always gonna happen. Others are inspired during the course of the year. For example, this year, about a month and change ago, Kimmer pulled her childhood wooden dollhouse out of retirement and began remodeling it room by room assisted by some shopping at Hobby Lobby.

So.

This year's Christmas gifts featured a bit of shopping at Hobby Lobby sore tiny lights, lamp stands, silverware, and china.

Oh, and an RV to be assembled with something like a billion tiny parts.

It'll be interesting to see where all this leads to next year's Christmas giftgiving.

But there you are:

It's an ever-evolving experience that continues to surprise us even this far out.

☺️

[thedaveandkimmershow]

For the first time in our marriage, Kimmer 'n I did not exchange gifts on Christmas Day.

Which is kind of surprising because I'm the past we spent most of Christmas Eve wrapping gifts as well as last minute shopping. In the past, I stayed up 'til 1 or 2 finishing my wrapping duties. In the past, we crafted our Christmas Day around gift giving.

So...

What happened?

A couple things. We entertained more and we gave ourselves permission to prioritize peace and relaxation.

Don't get me wrong, we had plans for how Christmas Eve and Christmas Day would work. In fact I was articulating those plans to my dad on the afternoon of Christmas Eve.

So even we, at that point, didn't have a clue about the pivot we'd make in what we believed was a pretty established plan.

Oof.

When talking about the week of Christmas in the past, I usually talk about it as if we're launching ourselves from the top of a slide that, in our case, begins on my birthday, the 23rd, and ends when we go to bed at the end of Christmas Day, fully exhausted.

This time around, we had a soft start on Saturday the 21st, the Eve of a Christmas dinner part with some dear friends. Of course there's preparation involved so once we're a couple days out from that Saturday all we're thinking about is that Saturday.

We didn't deep dive into our plans right away on Thursday, thank goodness. I think the most Christmas thing we did was watch How The Grinch Stole Christmas at midnight before going to bed.

Friday, though, the 20th, was definitely a production day. I set our flat screen on the piano bench in our living room and let our Christmas With The Kranks dvd play in the background while I de-Thanksgiving'd our dining room, living room, and holiday tree.

Holiday tree?

Yeah. We leave the tree up the whole year and decorate it according to the holiday or the season. In this case, it was decorated for Fall with Fall colored leafs. There were more such leafs around the rooms as well as pilgrim figurines in one spot. I gathered it all up into crates that are stored in the garage.

Now, while I'm de-Thanksgiving the rooms and tree, Kimmer starts wrapping presents in living room...

Baking caramel for apples in the kitchen...

Making white chocolate pretzels in there as well.

The presents she's wrapping, by the way, are for our friends coming over the following night. Linzy and her boyfriend are also supposed to join us but that's looking less and less likely as she valiantly tries to recover from a bout of laryngitis. ☹️

Meanwhile, as all the preparation continues, Christmas With The Kranks finishes and we pop in the movie, Scrooge, starring Albert Finney. It's a favorite of Kimmer's from her childhood. It's also a musical with a relentless earworm of a song called "Thank You Very Much" that's both catchy and clever, playing on the reality that the townspeople are celebrating Scrooge's death while Scrooge, guided by the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come, believes he's literally being thanked for some achievement.

Since we also recently watched "A Muppet Christmas Carol", though, we're pretty much in agreement the Paul Williams is the better composer, the Muppet soundtrack being the superior composition across the boards 

Now it's Saturday the 21st. We're gonna have guests today so I get to vacuuming and sweeping the house from one end to the other. Kimmer finishes with the presents inbetween bouts of cooking while "The Santa Clause" plays in the living room.

After I'm done with the floors, we pull out the exterior Christmas lights for the front of the house.

At some point we head out shopping. I quickly bound over to FedEx to pick up a canvas print I made for Kimmer. Then I hit Trader Joe's, the Dollar Tree, our Neighborhood Walmart, then home again by 530.

Shortly after, our friends turn up with their kids and we have a fun, lovely, wiggly, delicious evening.

Now, we haven't yet placed ornaments in the tree. It's basically stripped down to just lights. So, with a couple boxes of ornaments nearby, our friend, Hilary, begins decorating for us. And with that we're of to the races for a lovely lovely lovely evening. ☺️

The next morning, Sunday the 22nd, there are a lot of dishes to do. Even though we used festive paper plates and cups, everything else was metal and glass and ceramic and, since our dishwasher doesn't work, there was a lot piling up in there.

So the dishes we did.

Now the dishwasher isn't the only appliance not working. Our clothes dryer also doesn't work. So to launder our clothes, we run 'em through the washer then take it all to the laundromat for drying. 

On this occasion, we have two loads so I throw the first in and we hop in the car for Christmas Eve dinner and Christmas Day dinner shopping.

Turns out, there's a lot of grocery shopping to do and, by the time we get back, time's pretty tight. By the time we run the second load of laundry through an express cycle, it's a about five to eight and the laundromat closes at nine.

It worked out I was all done at the Laundromat coming up on eight thirty which is good because next I've gotta hit Trader Joe's and Dollar Tree, both closing at nine.

With a list in hand, I dash through both stores and hit Fred Meyer coming up on nine to grab vanilla bean cupcakes for either Christmas Eve or Christmas morning.

In 'n out of there in five minutes, I'm on to our Neighborhood Walmart for a ham steak,.then to Safeway up the street for cat food.

Home at nine-thirty.

Walking in the door, I find Kimmer's got her late aunt's Christmas ceramics placed in our family room. She also has most of the garland up, helped by the fact that last year I stuck each one with a note saying exactly where it goes in the house.

We end the night by finishing The Family Man.

Quick tally of what we haven't finished: the Tim Curry Audible version of A Christmas Carol is still dangling in the school room with Scrooge and The Ghost of Christmas Past. Also, the movie that started right on the heels of Last Christmas. It's called Me Before You starring Emilia Clarke which is not a Christmas movie but which we accidently did watch half of 'cause we got hooked.

The next morning is my birthday morning which I start by feeding the cats at 7 and making coffee to start Kimmer's day. At which point I go back to sleep until 10. 

That was a WHOPPER of a gift, by the way. Sleeping in on a school day without any responsibilities in front of me. 😉

My ten o'clock breakfast is home made eggs, bacon, croissants, and hot chocolate at our dining room table on which my birthday presents are also attached: two birthday bags and one gift that's wrapped. Call it the Morning Specialty: breakfast & birthday presents. ☺️

I actually finish my breakfast before starting in on the gift. That would've been unheard of in my kid years. A bit like putting a treat on your dog's nose and expecting it not to eat it unless commanded to.

Yeah.

I would've failed that test once upon a time.

My presents, by the way, were a black Harry Potter Mischief Managed t-shirt, a green fleece pull-over, and part of a wooden film display for my edit suite.

After that?

Yup. It's relaxing time. 😁

Around two-thirty we head out into the world. First stop, Cheeky & Dry on Phinney Ridge for a bit of holiday shopping for non-alcoholic drinks. We end up a half hour there chatting up the owner and fellow shoppers 'cause it's Christmastime and everyone's chatty. Then we're at GoodWill down the hill because we always land at a GoodWill on our birthdays 'cause you never know what you're gonna find and, worst case, I love taking pictures of their holiday displays.

By quarter of five we're parked in front of Pub70 on the Seattle waterfront intending to check out the Christmas Bar at the Edgewater Inn. Unfortunately for us, the Christmas Bar was only a thing from the previous Tuesday to basically the night before. So we're sitting there at a couch table in front of the fire in a darkened room filled with the after work crowd. Which is our cue to head back to the bar at Pub70 where there's a more Christmassy vibe and it's simply more relaxed.

And so we spend the next hour and a half enjoying our meals, drinks, and this lovely nighttime holiday experience on the waterfront.

By six-thirty, we're on the road again, stopped in at the Interbay Whole Foods for their fancy soap 'cause one of us happened to mention it during dinner and we both realized we could grab one in our way into Ballard.

At 7 we're in Ballard. Just barely. The Trader Joe's where we're picking up a Trader Joe's gift card gift.

Quarter tonight we're meeting up with Linzy at her new place at which we get a half-hour or so of personal tour before we all head north. Back to the house.

Linzy manages to beat us there and is waiting in our driveway when we pull up.

Inside, Kimmer show off her childhood wooden dollhouse on which she's been working again for a month or so after pulling it out of our garage and onto a storage ottoman that now serves as a work table. She goes room by room (illuminated by tiny interior lights) in  a kind of interactive show 'n tell.

Linzy was fascinated. ☺️

Unbeknownst to us, earlier in the day, Linzy had been at See's Candies at Alderwood Mall shortly after it opened. It was packed. 

It's also where she scored my birthday present that she now hands over to me. ❤️❤️❤️

The plan for the night was to watch a Christmas movie together. Either The Man Who Invented Christmas or A Christmas Story. With that in mind, I move our flat screen onto the piano bench and our DVD player into the piano. In the meantime, though, there's a problem with an internal door lock at the new place, the one we just toured. It's a problem because the front door provides access to a lobby. The internal door provides access to everything else.

So yeah. A problem that has to be addressed because it's the holidays, nearly Christmas Eve, and is there even anyone who can come out and get that door open?

Turns out, yes.

So 930 I follow Linzy back down to the new place where we meet up with an Eastern European jack of all trades sent over by an agency. Didn't catch his name but he had a most excellent professional manner and before long had the door open without a scratch.

Afterwards, he was off to his next call as Linzy 'n I hung out for a bit.

She was very apologetic about the plot twist in my birthday but, the way I figure it, we got out of the experience a story to tell and some father/daughter hang time.

A pretty great deal, I'm thinking.

We call it a night ten minutes before eleven. When I get home, Kimmer 'n I start watching The Santa Clause 2... and conk out by the blind date.

☺️

Next morning we're up at 730 and it.

Is.

Christmas Eve.

Christmas Eve day.

Got things to do, of course. Relaxing's first then we head out around ten-thirty with a list of Christmas presents for friends. We grab a wicker basket or two at Value Village, couple gift cards along with croissants and other breakfast-y items, and then Grocery Outlet for one final gift card. Then, back to the ranch.

What we're waiting on now is the green flag from my dad. You see, Linzy 'n I are going over to my mom 'n dad's place around one...

Only I'm talking to my dad on the phone at twelve-thirty when he tells me he's gotta hit the grocery stores starting at one. So he's gonna call me when he's done. Probably around three.

Rolling the dice a little, I hit the road again around quarter past two hoping everything's time out.

Everything?

Sure. I've got Linzy's sound gear I've gotta load into the car to return to her. I've gotta get gas. And I've gotta stop by the Dollar Tree.

It's actually while I'm at the Dollar Tree that my dad calls to give me the go ahead so I head down to Linzy's place, drop of the gear, she gets in my car and we roll over to my parent's place where we spend a lovely time sharing this little piece of the holidays.

By the time I drop linzy back at her place, it's around 630. I'm gonna continue north to home. She's gonna follow along after gathering up the food she's bringing tonight.

By 'n by, I'm home when Linzy shows up with her food and her boyfriend's dog, Teddy. And since Teddy's gotta go for a walk anyway, we all go for a walk, taking in the neighborhood lights and displays, enjoying each other's company, and unanimously agreeing that Teddy is a good dog.

Now the plan we have is something like we all leave around nine: Linzy and Teddy back to her place, Kimmer 'n I to St. Mark's for their Christmas concert and midnight service. So we'll have dinner together then watch as much of the film The Man Who Invented Christmas as we can 'til it's time to go.

That was the plan, anyway.

So what happened?

Well, what happened is that we were having the loveliest time together. Plus, it's a most excellent movie Linzy'd never seen before and she.

was.

hooked.

We blew through nine pm all the way through to the end of the movie.

Linzy 'n Teddy weren't out of the house until eleven.

Needless to say a good time was had by all.

The only thing that didn't happen?

None of our presents to each other got wrapped. And we were in no mood to stay up late to wrap them.

So off to sleep we went. Sugarplums and all that.

Christmas morning we're up at 730 not at all roaring to start the day. So instead we laze about bed until it's time to join Linzy for our Christmas Day movie.

Christmas Day movie?

Yeah. The Christmas classic, Elf, string Wil Farrell and playing at then Alderwood 16 at 11:30. With self-buttered popcorn.

You'd think a movie we'd seen a billion times wouldn't be that big a deal one more time. It's just that none of us had seen it on the big screen. Because of that, we spent the next hour-and-a-half pointing at different places on the big screen, details we missed all these years.

It was a surprising time at the movie theater. It was a lot of fun. And it was also a straight up Christmas gem which not all movies that screen on Christmas Day are.

Twenty after one, Linzy heads back to her place to get ready for Christmas dinner at our place. We head back to our place to do the same. About three-ish, Linzy shows up with a selection of cheeses, a selection of crackers, and a selection of meats (,including prosciutto)... so we socialize over these delightful appetizers. After that, we do a round of present opening with her. A touch of family time, if you will.

Around four, Kimmer starts wondering if Safeway's still open. Turns out they are... so I find myself there, a half-hour to go 'til closing, the employee at the door tells me. And if I didn't get the message, the store's reminded through public address every.

five.

minutes.

At 630 back at home, Rachel and Chris show up beating food for our Christmas potluck... and gifts for us. So we dona second round of gifts before moving on to dinner before moving on to party games with Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown! and Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town playing on our flat screen in the background, the sound muted.

In the end, it was wonderful family time. Fellowship. Laughter. Meaning. It really was emotionally a full day by the time Linzy left around 830 and Rachel 'n Chris left at 930.

By the way, we still hadn't wrapped our presents for each other yet and we weren't going to. 

You see, we decided to let the peace and relaxation vibes continue to flow as we had Christmas Eve.

Which is how, for the first time in our marriage, we didn't open Christmas presents, the ones we meant for each other, on Christmas Day.

Wait. I take that back. We didn't open the presents we usually open on Christmas Day. That much is true. I did, however, manage to fill Kinmer's stocking as well as ready her Christmas Eve gift. It's a tradition we picked up from other families that open presents on Christmas Eve. Only we determined to exchange just one over the years.

So yeah.

Kimmer got her first gift Christmas Eve. 

And then nothing from me at all on Christmas Day.

Our revised plan was now to have our Christmas morning on the evening of Boxing Day, December 26. Which is what we did.

I think we started wrapping presents around five while Kimmer also got dinner up 'n running. Then around six-fifteen we had dinner by the light of our Christmas tree. Then around seven I pulled up a Manheim Steamroller Christmas playlist and we spent the next two hours opening our gifts to each other. I won't lie, there was a touch of the old days of Christmas to our evening. I suppose the musical trip back down memory lane had something to do with it. Also, I imagine, there's just something different when it's just the two of us like it was back in the early days at our condo in Lake City.

It really was a peaceful Christmas.

It was relaxing. It was a meaningful Christmas.

Interestingly, though...

That's not the last we've seen of Christmas this year.

In the end, this year we'll have celebrated Christmas four times. Once with our friends on Saturday the 21st. A second time with Linzy and Rachel and Chris on Christmas Day. A third time with each other on the day after Christmas. And, before this year runs out, with family in Irvine.

In the past, across different holidays and events, we've seen benefits of stretching those experiences beyond a single day. And for us, this year, we discovered how much more of the Christmas spirit can be had when you intentionally choose friendship, peace, and relaxation.

After all, what's actually possible if we're not prepared, if we're not re- energized by such things as belong to Christmas?

[thedaveandkimmershow]

Turns out a friend of ours has a knack for decorating Christmas trees. 

They weren't super motivated this year because it's been a busy year, but when they learned family was gonna show up on their doorstep, their art director skills kicked into full gear.

We talked about it last night after Christmas dinner and I found myself passing along wisdom gained from my own childhood memories regarding the day after Christmas.

You see at least the one year, my parents determined to buy Christmas decorations on the day after Christmas when stores were looking to positively unload their stock of Christmas inventory. Sixty-five percent off. Seventy. Eighty, maybe.

One year I clearly remember my parents partaking of the sales at Frederick & Nelson: wrapping paper, ribbons, bows, ornaments, et cetera. So, God help us, we got up early, drove downtown, parked probably in that parking garage across third avenue from the old Bon Marche, and walked over to F&N to stand in line by the doors on Pine Street between 5th & 6th.

At some point, the doors open and we become part of a mad stream of shoppers flowing into the department store. And the thing I’ll never forget is that not only were people running for the escalators, I saw an old woman with a cane running.

An old woman.

With a cane.

Running.

It was awkward as hell, but there you go. The magic of the season.

Afterwards, we stood in a hella long line to pay for our Christmas booty…

And then we went home.

It’s a memory that always comes to visit me on the 26th every December making me feel super awesome for staying home.

And this time, last night, when the need for wisdom arose, I had the story handy for passing on to someone who's similarly contemplating their need for Christmas decorations...

At the end of the coming year.

:-)

[thedaveandkimmershow]

“A Christmas Carol” by Charles Dickens is a primary feature of our Christmastimes whether it be the original text, an audiobook, or the various films we favor.

With Christmas Day nearly over, then, a couple passages come to mind, the first one courtesy the nephew of Ebenezer Scrooge:

“...I am sure I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round—apart from the veneration due to its sacred name and origin, if anything belonging to it can be apart from that—as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow-passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys. And therefore, uncle, though it has never put a scrap of gold or silver in my pocket, I believe that it has done me good, and will do me good; and I say, God bless it!” 

Scrooge’s nephew refers to “the only time I know of, in the long calendar year…”

A yearly tradition of goodwill for a few weeks.

At the end of the book, we get this. About Scrooge himself:

"Scrooge was better than his word. He did it all, and infinitely more; and to Tiny Tim, who did not die, he was a second father. He became as good a friend, as good a master, and as good a man, as the good old city knew, or any other good old city, town, or borough, in the good old world. Some people laughed to see the alteration in him, but he let them laugh, and little heeded them; for he was wise enough to know that nothing ever happened on this globe, for good, at which some people did not have their fill of laughter in the outset; and knowing that such as these would be blind anyway, he thought it quite as well that they should wrinkle up their eyes in grins, as have the malady in less attractive forms. His own heart laughed: and that was quite enough for him."

And that was quite enough for him.

At the end of the book, we get full-blown transformation. Not an acknowledgement of goodwill this one time of year every year. Rather, an embracing of purpose manifested through goodwill.

Transformation, though. My eye’s on that theme of Dickens’ story. 

One I will continue to ponder as we transition into our collective next chapter.

Merry Christmas to all!

[thedaveandkimmershow]

I lied to Santa.

I did. Seriously. Year after year in grade school right up until my dad blew the lid off the whole Santa thing. The question was: “Have you been a good boy this year?” And the answer I always gave was “Yes, Santa.”

Lie.

“Have you been a good boy this year?”

“Oh yes, Santa.”

Lie.

“And I’ll just bet you’ve been a very good boy this year.”

“Yes, Santa. I have.”

Lie... again.

I was shameless.

Shameless... because in reality, there was plenty of objective evidence to demonstrate that I was not, in fact, a good boy.

Even I couldn’t miss it.

For one thing, I lied about stuff sometimes. Pretty sure that behavior doesn’t show up on the Nice List.

For another, I sucked at paying attention. Had the diagnosis existed at the time, I woulda been tagged A.D.H.D.. In fact, at one point, my scout leader told my mom I was hyperactive and boy was she pissed. Not at him for saying it... but at me for being it.

Again... not on the Nice List.

There were people I made fun of... not good.

There were people I ignored.

I hauled off and hit one of my classmates with my lunch box one time.

I tripped people sometimes... or gave them flats.

I was sent to the principal’s office a bunch. I talked while the teacher was talking. I didn’t do, exactly, all of my homework. I disrespected certain teachers and authorities. I had an attitude that persevered from grade school into Junior High where my Algebra teacher’d give me an A for my academics, but a C for my so-called “citizenship”.

And yes. I did drive at least two of my teachers at Lawton Elementary to distraction. They actually lost it and yelled at me.

At home, I was subject to groundings and no-TV as a result of various behaviors. I don’t know how often those punishments came up, but again...

Definitive proof that I did not belong on the Nice List.

On top of all that, there were any number of good kids I could look at and decide for myself. Was I like them?

Nope.

Did I care?

Nope.

So yeah... I wasn’t a good boy.

At least... not by Santa's standards.

And so I lied to the big guy every. single. year.

Interestingly, it didn’t occur to me until recently that if there really was a Naughty or Nice List, if Santa really did know if I’d been bad or good... then why the heck did he even bother asking me??? He coulda just waved me off before I even got close to the Big Chair and said “Forget it, Ris, try again next year.”

Instead, he asked, I lied, and come Christmas morning Lo and Behold...

There were presents under the tree...

For me.

Ha! Sucker.

Of course, there wasn’t really a Santa Claus. It was my parents the whole time. My parents, who actually did know whether I’d been bad, when I’d been bad... and how often.

Had I known they were in charge of Christmas presents from the start... I probably would’ve written off getting any presents at all.

Like, ever.

Instead, the gifts showed up faithfully. Every year. Good ones, too. Great ones.

Yeah.

The word for it (I would later come to learn) is Grace. I received gifts, it turns out, I never deserved.

Damn.

It was probably the most powerful lesson I learned about Christmas growing up. I didn't learn it in real time, of course. It's one of those lessons that pays of with maturity, age, experience, insight, something.

I don't know what the trigger was.

I just know that eventually...

The lesson, that continued act of grace, informs me to this day.

☺️

[thedaveandkimmershow]

Turning 16 seemed like a big deal. For what reason I'm not sure. It just did.

Turning 18 I could be drafted into military service... which coincided with graduating high school. Definitely a big deal.

21 for sure cuz then clubs and drinking.

After that?

There wasn't an age out front of me that would allow me to do something I couldn't already do. So yeah, 25 seemed big whoop since all it was was four years older. And then 30 seemed too young to be unnecessarily grim about it. Which I wasn't.

After that?

Well, we were pretty caught up in family life to think one way or another as the numbers ticked ever upward.

40...

50...

Although I will say that not terribly long after fifty we embarked on the empty nesting life that seemed little more than getting our rooms in our house back for remodeling and repurposing along with full, unilateral control of our schedules. Which was actually pretty great. If empty nesting was pegged to an age I definitely would've celebrated it. We kinda sorta only recognized its import after the fact.

And then so today 60.

Once again, unlike 21 I'm not afforded new stuff I can do now that I was forbidden to do before.

Still no flying cars is my point.

Definitely 60 feels more ache-y than 21. So that's not great.

On the other hand, we're reaping the benefits of experience as married, professional, adult human beings. We've been doing this a while.

And trust me. Those years/decades make a HUUUUGE difference even when they're a pain in the ass, disappointing, drama-filled, seriously challenging times where loss is actively on the table and a lot of things we were led to expect did not work that way at all.

As Harry from "Resident Alien" would say...

"That's some bullshit!"

That's not all it was, of course. It was everything.

Everywhere.

All at once.

It was and continues to be Life that's breathtaking in scope. A full spectrum experience.

And yes. Wild swings in the spectrum piling on top of each other at the same time.

It was and continues to challenge us at the expert level. Not everyone can do this. Just... they can't. There were a number of roadside bombs scattered across our path over the years that weren't lethal and I don't know why.

They sure seemed lethal.

It was and continues to engage everything we are and everything we have.

For sure. From the very beginning. Across the full spectrum of our life together starting with early on when we didn't have as much game as we do now.

However.

We learned the whole way. We've been professionally and personally building on an established base of learned and practical experience. There's a lot we've seen and done before. There's a lot we can extrapolate or reverse engineer.

We freak out less. We're faster to answers. We can strategize on the fly. We can coordinate our personal and professional lives from the road. We know people who know things we don't know and are willing to help us.

And so on.

It's not exactly that I'm smarter now than I was at 21. It's mostly a raw speed at figuring things out in real time that's gotten better since I was 21.

Anyway...

I think the punchline is that we're accomplishing more at this deep end of the pool. Which makes sense. We know more. We have more in our wheelhouses than we did at 21. And we have the insight that's necessary to put that knowledge and experience in play both strategically and on the fly. Sometimes at a moment's notice. Sometimes under high-stakes pressure. Sometimes in the face of stunning ambiguity.

Last thing:

Both of us don't, do not feel like we're at the end of our careers.

She's actively pursuing her doctorate, for crying out loud.

And me?

The tech of my profession is doing what it did when I was 21. It's experiencing a paradigm shift. Which is the end of the road for some professionals... but since I jumped in during a time of profound change...

Profound change is what I know to surf.

To me, it's a sign that things are getting good. And I have plenty of friends in the profession who think the same way.

This.

Is getting.

Good.

Maybe it's the tolerance for stunning ambiguity that's necessary for the will and excitement to surf it. I don't know.

But for sure I'm lucky that at this end of the race track...

It still feels like the beginning.

🙂

[thedaveandkimmershow]

In the bad 'ol days of my youth I never understood this.

"Scrooge was better than his word. He did it all, and infinitely more; and to Tiny Tim, who did not die, he was a second father. He became as good a friend, as good a master, and as good a man, as the good old city knew, or any other good old city, town, or borough, in the good old world."

Okay why?

I couldn't understand, okay, he sees his headstone and freaks out? Like he didn't know he was gonna die some day? No matter what?

That seemed like a stretch.

Great story. Great ending. Just never bought the motivation.

'Course that's just once upon a time Me drawing a straight line from the headstone to the transformation when in fact, the ghosts remind Scrooge he was once a person who embraced life, embraced love, who through circumstance became the antithesis of that life and love. He's shown the potential value of his life in the grand scheme, what a difference he could make. And it's revealed to him the inevitable end to the path he's so far embraced.

Which 'causes him to "spontaneously" reclaim his former self, the incentive is so high.

So yeah. A much bigger story than I once understood and am continuing to understand as we return to the films and the text each year. It's an unplanned, decades long academic-ish study for which I receive no credit, no benefit other than further understanding. And further understanding. To the point where the full transformation that happens over night, a transformation that sustains to the end of Scrooge's life... makes clear, abundant sense. I buy it.

Took me long enough.

☺️

[thedaveandkimmershow]

Right now, this very minute, there are presents under our tree.

There are fully wrapped presents under our tree.

There are even a couple presents tucked between the side of our piano and the arm chair next to it 'cause these ones wouldn't fit under the tree.

These aren't ours, actually. They're for friends who are coming over later today. Our friends and their kids. But still.

It's fun to see presents under the Christmas tree even when the Christmas tree itself isn't fully decorated.

Right now, this very minute, the tree's strung with white lights. The tree is draped with a 4-inch wide gold ribbon wrapped around the tree from top to bottom.

Ornaments is what's missing. And that's a today thing. It's on the list along with setting the front of our house (mostly along the gutters) with Christmas lights.

Back to presents, though, 'cause it's a fun topic.

There are also our presents hidden in different rooms of the house. I have the ones Santa's gonna bring Kimmer stashed in different places waiting to be wrapped. I don't have a plan for the wrapping yet. It's on the to-do list with a deadline of before I go to bed Christmas Eve.

Which is sometimes one or two in the morning.

The saving grace here is that I'm pretty sure help is one the way.

Here's the relevant text from Daughter #1:

"also i just ordered these and am totally down to share if you need help wrapping on christmas eve"

"oh and i also have twine for ribbons :)"

Whew.

I just checked that after thinking I misremembered it. But there you go: good as a contract! 😁

So anyway, I have Kimmer's presents stashed, she has mine stashed, and even if we were to be in the same room wrapping presents for each other, no one would be looking. Period. No one would be looking.

You see, we lived in some small spaces along the way and we like to preserve the Christmas Eve/Christmas Morning surprise. That's it. We're not children on the hunt. We're adults who appreciate surprise. Of not know until it's time to know which, I suspect, is a grown-up thing 'cause my childhood self would think me an idiot for saying what I just said about waiting.

The last of the present, by the way, are gifts from work. From the producer with whom I spent most of this year working. From the woman who's responsible for cleaning and maintenance in our building and others on campus. One of her daughters actually hosted the show we did last year that won us a local Emmy award.

The present from my producer is actually two presents full wrapped and ribboned together. The 411 on at least one of the gifts is that while we were at a wedding for a mutual friend in November with our spouses at the reception, the producer and my wife collaborated on what she would be getting me.

So yeah.

Even Kimmer knows what's in there.

As for the other gift, it's a straight up treat out in the open: four moon cakes in a deep red decorative tin box.

And no. Not gonna touch those until Christmas Eve at the earliest.

☺️

Anyway, that's the state of Christmas presents in our house.

This very minute.

😁

[thedaveandkimmershow]

During the weekend before the weekend before Christmas...

We finished the 1984 Horror/Comedy/Christmas classic film  Gremlins. We started the more proper, on-the-nose  Christmas film, Family Man, starting Téa Leoni, Nicolas Cage, Don Cheadle,  and Jeremy. It's a glimpse at an alternate version of the Nicolas Cage character's life. And every year I find the story compelling as hell.

Somewhere in there during the weekend, we continued the Tim Curry-read version of A Christmas Carol. I think we made it through to the Ghost of Christmas Past and Scrooge revisiting one of his old school rooms.

I also finished our family Christmas letter over the weekend. Read it to Kimmer who had 2 notes for my consideration that were easy to incorporate.

With the final version in place, I pass the final tweaks along to the Dutch version of the letter and BAM. Both English and Dutch versions are now done so the process can finally, officially start. I  gather up all the cards 'n envelopes, stamps, address labels, return address labels, and Christmas seals (stickers). Then I start hand-writing the cards to my family in The Netherlands 'cause those cards should definitely be the first ones on their way out the door. For my cousins, it's English all the way but I keep the language declarative, the sentence structures simple. For my aunts and uncle, I do the same thing but then run the text through a translator, check the resulting translation with another translator, then leave this double-checked translation up on my desktop screen while I carefully transfer the official text onto our Christmas cards by hand. Legible enough so my third grade teacher, Mrs. Lohse, would've been proud. ☺️

Monday morning, first thing, I'm at Kinkos printing all the letters then assembling the cards/envelopes/carefully folded Christmas letters/stamps/address labels/return address labels/Christmas seals bound for Holland.

Right off the bat?

Ten cards done and on their way.

To keep the workload reasonable, I have another ten out the door each day of the workweek 'til Thursday. Then BAM. Done.

2024 Christmas cards 'n letters all on their way! 😁

On Monday the 16th, we jump from The Family Man to Last Christmas 'cause Family Man had got to the intense parts and we were really just down for happy cute sweet Christmas vibes with which to end the day.

We finished the movie the next night and, after the first two movie credits following the final scene, Prime Video decided it was time for us to watch Me Before You that also stars Emilia Clarke.

Not a Christmas movie, though. Not on the list of movies we have in mind for the Christmas season.

Yeah.

We watched half of Me Before You on the spot.

Okay so now a word about things we started that, so far, we left dangling. 

For example, Tim Curry's still waiting for us to rejoin he, Scrooge, and the Ghost of Christmas Past in an old school room. The Family Man is still paused in an uncomfortable moment. And I don't know when we're coming back to Me Before You.

Why?

Because Wednesday night we watched A Muppet Christmas Carol featuring one of the best screen adaptations and perhaps the best Ebenezer Scrooge performance...

Ever.

The next night, Thursday night, we start into The Man Who Saved Christmas. It's a fictionalized story of Charles Dickens' experience writing A Christmas Carol. Another one of those films with compelling story and performances. 

We got as far as the part where Dickens is just getting to know this character in person that he only recently conjured from thin air.

This month, we managed low-key shopping experiences. Not a mad dash. Nothing to cause us wanting or needing to pull our hair out. We started early with what I like to call benign shopping. Sort of looking around with the option to buy because there's no emergency here and we've got enough Christmas shopping under our belts that we're always able to avoid emergency Christmas shopping.

Thank God.

Ours, by the way, is a mix of online and brick 'n mortar shopping. The brick 'n mortar shopping, by the way, was only intense on Black Friday and the Black Friday weekend during the day. After that the browsing and/or purchasing was a pretty chill experience.

Right now, then, I've only two gifts left to  left that I want Santa to deliver Kimmer's way. I've got all the presents for under the tree (not wrapped yet), all the stocking stuffers, the one present for her to open Christmas Eve, and even a Christmas card for my lovely wife because, heck, I basically wrote to everyone else in our lives.

So yeah.

It really, really helps to be able to focus like that.

Kimmer, on the other hand, is doing the same for me as well as the same for everyone else in our lives on Santa's Nice list as well as co-planning and cooking for a Christmas potluck tomorrow night as well as making plans for my birthday.

While she's actively pursuing her doctoral studies.

So that's probably more impressive.

🤔🤔🤔

[thedaveandkimmershow]

A quick word about a tiny bit of Handel's Messiah:

It's two moments, actually. The transition from "There Were Shepherds..." to "And Suddenly..." and the transition from "And Suddenly" to "Glory To God".

Two moments.

Those two moments occur, well, the first one occurs between the first and second soprano recitatives about three quarters of the way through Part 1 of Handel's Messiah.

Recitative

“There were shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.

And lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord."

Recitative

"And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host, praising God, and saying:"

The first recitative is straight forward storytelling aided by a touch of orchestral support. The second recitative is a musical declaration.

In this first transition, between recitatives, it's the shift in music that's most compelling. In my own emotional response to the moment, the shift to the second orchestral accompaniment captures something wondrous that's about to happen.

Which is exactly what's gonna happen.

I especially appreciate the declaration in the second recitative that immediately and profoundly pays off in the chorus. It's what's so compelling about that second transition. It creates such expectation that I have no problem imagining angels arrayed across the sky making such pronouncements:

"Glory to God! Glory to God!

Glory to God in the highest,

And peace on earth.

Goodwill toward men."

The last thing I'll mention is that "Glory to God in the highest" is like a trumpet fanfare to my ears. And the way Handel staggers "Goodwill toward men" rhythmically and melodically, building continuously on itself, well... it feels like encouragement. It feels like he's trying to breathe goodwill into the air.

But "And peace on earth"?

Yeah.

When the basses drop an octave from "And peace" to "on earth", that always feels dangerous to me. It feels profound. It feels like a fearless declaration, this thing that will happen.

And peace.

On earth.

Anyway...

The transition from "...and saying..." to "Glory to God" is always this huge moment in my imagination. Which is Handel capturing the text perfectly. Causing me to imagine those angels in the sky...

Every time.

☺️