#they survived out of sheer dumb luck

[gaily-daily]

You watch all these horror movies wondering why the writers always make the characters so stupid. All of their decisions are dumb beyond all reason.

And then you start listening to real horror stories from survivors on podcasts and realize...people really are that stupid.

[rexcaliburechoes]

Scarlet, strawberry, and garnet for an oc of your choice <3

spins another comically large wheel that just reads the name "istorros" (yall i'm not trapped in here with you. you are trapped in here with me. LMAO.)

SCARLET - How do they grieve?

frankly? poorly. but this has a lot to do with how he was raised and how emotions were frequently weaponised against him. the most striking moment when he was one of the darkest moments in his life (in his opinion, a world ending threat has nothing on interpersonal trauma), and a beloved animal companion was killed after he'd barely made mention of it once. he couldn't even grieve; he had to immediately dispose of its corpse and shut down everything lest he be harmed further.

later, he gets better! he'll still refuse to talk about it, but he doesn't shut it down, at least! the bar is six feet under, i know. lol.

STRAWBERRY - What part of them is most like you? Was this intentional?

his trauma and his healing journey reflect mine really closely, hands down. i am NOT nearly as dry and blunt as he is, personality-wise, lol. i'm also not as nearly unsmiling as he is (he's a grouchy ass drow; i don't think most people could be as unsmiling as he is unless they're also a written character).

this is a really funny question to ask, since i've had one other oc a long time ago that reflected me very painfully closely. she was a fire emblem echoes oc, made to be another deep reflection of rigel. no matter how many times i try to have her start to heal from her trauma, she always refuses and gets worse. currently, she's retired and is living peacefully on a horse farm, as content/happy as she allows herself to be.

GARNET - If they had to kill someone, what method would they choose?

istorros is bound to the edicts of tempus, the warhammer, which means he is bound to fight others in honourable combat, and must not turn from a fight. hence, he could rather go about a fight directly, without beating around the bush or any frivolities. he's very efficient at killing, as a result.

however, he's not going to go and fight stupidly, either. most fights are done in a matter of seconds; the longer a fight goes on, the greater likelihood that something will go wrong, and you'll die, instead of your opponent. he'd rather kill quickly rather than draw something out for show.

once upon a time, before he worshiped tempus, and before he escaped the underdark, he would have tried to rely on poisons to ensure kills. but he would always be efficient with it; there's no use in keeping an opponent alive if there's a chance they will recover and kill you when you aren't looking.

he did learn how to poison a person before learning medicine to save them, after all...

[maybe-im-dark]

Instinct

Based on this post

The night was thick and dark, a heavy silence blanketing the forest as Logan and Wade moved through the underbrush. Shadows stretched out from towering pines, and the faint glow of moonlight filtered through the dense canopy, casting everything in an eerie silver. Wade kept close behind Logan, who was leading the way with calm, measured steps.

They’d been out there for hours, following a faint trail left by their target. Wade, usually the one cracking jokes and keeping the mood light, found himself silent as he watched Logan maneuver through the darkness like he’d been born to it. Wade knew Logan had spent years outdoors, but he hadn’t fully realized what that meant until now.

“Alright, peanut,” Wade whispered, finally breaking the silence as he stepped over a fallen branch. “How exactly are you figuring out where we’re going? It’s pitch black out here.”

Logan didn’t even glance back as he answered, “Using the stars and the magnetic fields of the earth, Wade.”

Wade chuckled. “Haha, very funny, but seriously, how’re we finding this place? Are we even close?”

Logan stopped, finally turning to give Wade a deadpan look. “How do you think I managed to survive in the Canadian wilderness all these years?”

Wade stared at him, waiting for the punchline, but Logan’s expression remained steady, unbothered. “Wait… you’re serious?”

Logan raised an eyebrow. “You really think I need a map to get around out here? I’ve been doing this a lot longer than you might think.”

Wade’s eyes narrowed as he looked at Logan, trying to piece together the full extent of what he was capable of. “Okay, so you can track people down in the middle of a forest…without a map. That’s…actually kinda hot, but let’s stay focused.”

Logan rolled his eyes, but there was the faintest hint of a smirk tugging at his lips. “Good to know where your priorities are.”

As they continued, Wade couldn’t help but be impressed. Logan moved almost silently, his every step calculated, barely a rustle in the leaves underfoot. He’d stop every so often, glancing up at the sky or feeling the air as if he could actually sense something out there. Wade was used to operating with gadgets, intel, and often sheer dumb luck. Logan, on the other hand, was using something primal, something honed from years of raw survival.

“Alright, sensei, teach me your ways,” Wade muttered, trying to match Logan’s stealth.

Logan glanced over his shoulder, amusement flickering in his gaze. “First lesson, don’t be loud.”

“Right, right. Got it.” Wade nodded, attempting to mirror Logan’s silent footsteps but failing miserably.

Twigs snapped beneath his feet, and he stumbled over a hidden root, only for Logan to catch his arm, steadying him without a word.

Wade looked down, a bit sheepish. “Alright, peanut, guess I’ve got some work to do.”

“Keep up and maybe you’ll learn a thing or two.” Logan shot him a quick smirk before pressing on, his gaze trained on the stars and the faint light peeking through the trees.

Wade watched him, caught somewhere between admiration and curiosity.

“How do you know all this?” Wade whispered. “I mean, the stars, the earth’s magnetic fields…I thought that was, like, folklore.”

“It’s not folklore,” Logan replied, pausing to adjust their course. “It’s instinct. And years of having to rely on something more than technology. You spend enough time out here, you learn to listen to things that most people ignore.”

Wade watched him, a newfound respect growing. He’d known Logan was capable, but this…this was something beyond skill or training. It was primal, something Wade didn’t quite understand but could only marvel at.

They reached a small clearing, and Logan stopped, signaling for Wade to crouch down beside him. Logan scanned the area, his senses heightened, and Wade held his breath, trying to feel the same tension in the air.

“There,” Logan muttered, nodding toward the faint glow of a campfire barely visible through the trees.

Wade peered out, squinting to see it.

“How did you…?” Wade started, shaking his head. “I’ve gotta hand it to you, Logie, you’re full of surprises.”

Logan’s gaze softened just a bit, a glint of satisfaction in his eyes. “Guess you don’t know everything about me yet.”

Wade chuckled quietly. “Well, keep it up, and you might just make me fall for you all over again.”

Logan shook his head, suppressing a smirk. “Let’s finish the mission first, Wade.”

But as they prepared to move forward, Wade couldn’t help but feel grateful for this quiet, intense side of Logan—the man who could lead him through a pitch-black forest using nothing but instinct and the stars. And for once, he didn’t feel the need to joke or break the silence. Just this once, he let himself follow Logan’s lead, trusting him completely.

[kimmie2me]

# 03. Unexpected Partners

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀✰⋆⁺⋆˙⠀⠀⠀⠀taglist ... chapters ... masterlist

.....

If you’d had a time machine, you wouldn’t use it for anything noble or selfless—no epic rescue of historical figures, no preventing major disasters. Nope. You’d drag yourself back a month just to shake your wide-eyed, naïve self by the shoulders and scream, "Don’t do it. Find another department. Any other department. Join traffic control. Herd cats. Just don’t end up here."

Because here was Bakugou personal circle of hell. The past few weeks felt like a marathon in which you’d been tripped at the starting line, dragged halfway, and then left to sprint uphill. In the rain. With weighted vests. There was no mercy in Bakugou’s world, only adrenaline and barked orders that carried enough force to knock the confidence right out of your chest.

You learned, fast and furiously, that he wasn’t just tough. He was ruthless, exacting, and demanded perfection with all the warmth of a drill sergeant who hadn’t had coffee. And coffee—you’d learned the hard way—was something that could make or break a morning. There was The Incident when you dared bring him a cup with too much sugar, only to receive a sharp glare and a grumbled, “What, you think I’m ten?” The next thirty minutes were dedicated to sprint drills so intense your calves whimpered for days. All you wanted to do is figure out what the hell his favorite coffee is! Yes, you're still trying..

And yes, you're still failing.

Bakugou’s teaching methods were a combination of trial by fire and sheer terror. He wasn’t interested in your excuses or half-assed answers. If you messed up, you’d know—usually by the clipped way he’d shout, “Run it again,” or the eye twitch that signaled he was two seconds from ripping the folder out of your hands and doing it himself.

It wasn’t just the shouting, though that was certainly a staple. It was the moments he’d watch you with that hawk-eyed stare, arms crossed and expression set like granite. There were no second chances when Bakugou was breathing down your neck; you either got it right or got ready to count pavement cracks while doing your punishment laps. You hadn’t done so many wall sits since training, thighs quivering like jelly by the time he allowed you to stand.

And it wasn’t just you. Anyone who dared step into his path found themselves swept up in the tornado of his expectations. It made surviving the day feel like a badge of honor, if surviving meant stumbling into your apartment with barely enough strength to fling your shoes off.

One time, you’d accidentally jumbled up a lead in a report, swapping suspect descriptions that Bakugou caught in record time. He’d smacked the paper onto your desk with an incredulous look. “D’you even read this before handin’ it in?” And just like that, your next hour was filled with circuits and resistance bands that made your arms feel like spaghetti. “C’mon, rookie, or should I start callin’ you noodle arms?” The jab stuck, and you groaned whenever he brought it up.

Bakugou’s wrath was tempered only by moments of begrudging silence, the rare instances where you met his eyes and thought you saw a flicker of something softer, only to blink and find it gone. Those moments would have been comforting if they weren’t fleeting, crushed by his next tirade over a misplaced document or a missed clue.

But just as you’d started thinking maybe you’d bitten off more than you could chew, a case dropped that pulled everyone into high gear: a string of burglaries, each more calculated than the last. No dumb luck, no rookie mistakes would fly with this one. Bakugou’s tension was palpable, a crackle in the air whenever he entered the room. He’d pace with his hands shoved into his pockets, muttering curses and theories under his breath like the case had insulted him personally.

Your nerves spiked with each passing day. Bakugou was more relentless than ever, orders flung out faster than you could grab your notebook. And if you so much as hesitated? He’d turn, eyes gleaming like a predator scenting blood. “Keep up, or get out.”

By the time you wrapped up that week’s legwork, you weren’t sure whether to feel accomplished or absolutely wrecked. Bakugou had pushed every ounce of strength and patience from your body, leaving you hollowed out and aching. Yet, for some reason you’d yet to understand, you kept coming back, stepping into the precinct with a quiet determination that only grew as his glare followed you like a challenge.

Time machine, you reminded yourself, scribbling down notes that were half-legible from your shaking hand. You’d go back, find yourself, and whisper conspiratorially, Choose desk duty. It’ll save your soul.

But you didn’t have a time machine. You had Bakugou. And you were starting to suspect he might just make a detective out of you, whether you survived him or not.

.....

The burglaries had started small—a string of break-ins that barely made the back page of the city’s morning paper. But each successive hit grew bolder, more precise, like the thief was taunting the force. By the time it hit their radar, Chief Yagi’s usually calm expression had hardened to steel, and even the more seasoned detectives were exchanging wary glances.

For you, it meant one thing: Bakugou was operating at maximum intensity, his usual scowl deepened to something almost carved from stone. It was an energy you could feel in the air, like the static before a lightning strike. And with that, the pace of your life turned from grueling to almost impossible. Long days blurred into longer nights, the fluorescent lights above burning into your skull as you combed through reports with squinting eyes and a splitting headache. The precinct buzzed with anticipation and tension, everyone bracing for the storm.

You sat at your desk, meticulously cross-referencing suspect details when Bakugou stormed in, clipboard in one hand and the other pressed into his hip like it was the only thing keeping him from losing it entirely. He glanced around the room, eyes sharp as the edge of a blade, before they settled on you. The air shifted.

“Rookie,” he barked, and you jumped, nearly dropping your pen. He didn’t wait for you to recover before launching into his rapid-fire speech. “Listen up, ‘cause I’m only sayin’ this once. The pattern’s changed. Our thief’s not just hittin’ high-value targets anymore—they’re goin’ after places with tech infrastructure. Means they’re not just lookin’ for loot—they’re diggin’ for data, and if we don’t get ahead, we’re gonna be two steps behind with our heads up our—”

He paused, jaw tightening like he was biting back an insult, and then leaned down, bringing himself to eye level. His eyes were an inferno, daring you to miss a word. “You listening?”

You nodded so fast it was a wonder your neck didn’t cramp, scribbling down notes as if your life depended on it. Maybe it did—at least, your peace of mind surely did. Bakugou’s tone wasn’t just demanding; it was drilled into your skull, searing in its urgency.

“Good. Now, look—”

“Oh! Hey, Kacchan!!”

The voice sliced through the room like a record scratch, shattering Bakugou’s hyper-focused tension into a thousand jagged pieces. He physically recoiled, straightening up so fast you’d think he’d been stung. Your pen stilled mid-word, eyes flicking between him and the newcomer with an internal "?!?!?!?!" blaring in neon letters.

Kacchan?

There, standing at the threshold of the precinct like he’d wandered in by accident, was Detective Midoriya Izuku, all soft smiles and bright green eyes. He gave a little wave as if Bakugou wasn’t seconds away from launching into orbit.

“Kacchan, hi! It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” Midoriya’s tone was impossibly cheerful, and the nickname fell from his lips like it was a greeting between best friends. But from the way Bakugou’s hands twitched, it may as well have been a bomb dropped into a room full of dynamite.

Bakugou’s response was instantaneous, voice sharp enough to cut glass. “What the hell’re you doin’ here, Deku?”

The silence that followed was suffocating, punctuated only by the distant hum of computers and a detective a few desks over clearing their throat awkwardly. Your heart thumped in your chest as if it was trying to escape the awkwardness, and you glanced at Midoriya, expecting him to shrink back. But he didn’t—his smile wavered, sure, but he held his ground, eyes earnest.

“I’m here to help with the case,” Midoriya explained, and it took everything in you not to whip your head around. Help? With your case?

Bakugou’s reaction was as explosive as you expected. “Help? You—”

But before he could finish, a voice cut through the tension like a blade. “Enough, boys.” Chief Yagi’s voice was firm as he walked in, flanked by another man who exuded calm authority—the infamous Chief Aizawa Shouta. His tired eyes swept over the room, taking in the scene with a raised brow.

“Chief Aizawa and his team are joining us for this operation. And that includes Detective Midoriya.” Chief Yagi’s tone left no room for argument.

Bakugou’s jaw set so tight you could hear the grind of teeth. And in that moment, you knew that whatever the past few weeks had been like? They were about to get a whole lot more complicated.

…

You barely had time to absorb Midoriya’s, let alone Cheif Aizawa's, sudden appearance before Chief Yagi called everyone into the briefing room. This would’ve been a regular meeting for the higher-ups—the kind you’d usually only hear about when Bakugou came out, slamming the door behind him, face redder than the emergency exit signs. But today, for reasons you couldn’t fathom, you were summoned along. Because apparently, if Bakugou was involved, you were involved.

The briefing room was already filling up, the thick scent of coffee and paper lingering in the air as officers shuffled in, muttering greetings and speculations under their breath. Chief Yagi took his place at the head of the room, looking as solid and unyielding as ever, while Chief Aizawa leaned against the wall, hands in his pockets, observing the room with the detached but alert gaze of a cat watching a busy street. Midoriya slid into a chair near the front, shooting you a small, encouraging smile. Bakugou, in contrast, looked like he’d swallowed a wasp.

Then, in strode Officer Ashido Mina, bright as a firecracker, with Officer Sero Hanta close behind her, both exuding a casual confidence that somehow didn’t feel out of place even in a room of high-stakes professionals. Mina shot a finger-gun wave at the room, winking in your direction before taking a seat across from Midoriya. Sero plopped down beside her, his grin almost lazy but eyes sharp, taking in everything at once.

Chief Yagi’s voice brought the room to order. “Alright, everyone, this joint task force is in place because the burglaries have escalated. We’re dealing with a team of thieves targeting secure information in addition to high-value assets. The leads point to a complex operation, and that’s where our collaboration comes in.”

He nodded to Chief Aizawa, who spoke in that low, measured tone that commanded instant respect. “We need all hands on deck. Each of you will have a role—whether it’s field, intel, or processing. Officer Uraraka will be on the evidence team, coordinating with the data we’ve collected so far.”

The mention of Uraraka’s name caught your attention, and sure enough, she was at the back, beaming when she spotted you. Her presence was a rare comfort in this sea of intense, stern faces. It had been years since you’d seen her, but it was like old times when she waved, mouthing an excited “Hey!”

“Detective Bakugou, Officer L/N, you’ll be working alongside Detective Midoriya’s team,” Chief Yagi continued, and the very air in the room seemed to vibrate as Bakugou’s scowl deepened. He was in full protest mode, shooting daggers at Midoriya, who looked back with a determined—if slightly nervous—smile.

Once the briefing concluded, Chief Yagi dismissed everyone, and the room exploded in chatter as officers filed out. You managed to navigate through the crowd until you reached Uraraka, who practically bounced on her toes, pulling you into a quick hug.

“Can you believe it? We’re working together!” she said, her voice bright with excitement. “I’ve been doing the fingerprinting, data scans—all the good stuff. Remember when I used to geek out about this stuff in school?”

“Oh, totally! You always aced those forensics projects,” you replied, grinning as the memories rushed back.

She nodded, laughing. “Exactly! And now, look at us! I get to actually do it. And you—you’re working with Bakugou Katsuki, of all people!” Her eyes widened with awe and maybe a little mischief, the kind that reminded you of her knack for getting you into trouble back in the day.

“Working is a strong word,” you muttered, glancing over at Bakugou, who was still glaring holes into Midoriya, ignoring everyone else. “Surviving might be more accurate.”

Uraraka giggled but quickly straightened when she caught Bakugou’s expression aimed squarely at her—a glare so intense that it was a wonder she didn’t spontaneously combust. She cleared her throat, gave you a small, sympathetic smile, and said, “Well, I’d better get back to it. I’ll send over the scans when they’re ready! And hey, catch up soon?”

You nodded, squeezing her hand in agreement. “Definitely. Thanks, Ochaco.”

With a final grin, Uraraka turned back to her workstation, her demeanor shifting from friendly to focused in an instant. You watched her go, feeling a brief pang of jealousy at how seamlessly she slid into her work. But that was quickly overridden by the realization that Bakugou was striding your way, arms crossed and a storm brewing in his expression.

“Done with your little reunion?” he sneered, barely waiting for you to nod. “Good. 'Cause now it’s time for you to actually do somethin’ useful, rookie.” He nodded towards the open case file in his hand. “Let’s go.”

.....

The silence between you and Bakugou was taut, strung up like an overused wire threatening to snap. He stalked ahead, practically dragging the storm cloud that was his mood behind him. You weren’t entirely sure why he’d decided that now was the time to go full boot camp on you, but here you were, heels clicking on the polished floor, trying not to look like you’d rather melt into it.

“Listen up, rookie,” Bakugou started without turning around, his voice a low rumble laced with that familiar bite. He navigated the labyrinth of hallways like a predator circling its territory. You’re gonna make yourself useful if it kills ya, got it?”

You swallowed thickly, feeling a combination of irritation and nerves twist in your chest. You’d learned over the past few weeks that Bakugou had a penchant for the extreme. Everything was all or nothing with him, whether it was paperwork, interrogations, or the way he yelled about the printer jamming (which was only your fault that one time).

“Got it,” you managed, though it came out weaker than you intended. He spared you a glance, eyes narrowing as if daring you to prove him right about all the times he’d muttered under his breath about “extras” wasting his time.

As if on cue, the door to one of the briefing rooms swung open, and Detective Kirishima stepped out, his broad grin a sharp contrast to Bakugou’s perpetual scowl. “Yo! Heard we’re working together on this one,” he said, his voice friendly and warm, instantly cutting through the tension.

Great. If there was ever a time to look capable, it was now. Not that Kirishima would ever point out your mistakes, but being around Bakugou had a way of amplifying your self-awareness until it was deafening.

“Try not to get in the way,” Bakugou snapped, jerking his thumb towards the entrance. You wondered if his eyes had always held that unrelenting glint or if he’d sharpened it specifically for you. Kirishima, bless him, only chuckled, patting you on the back as he passed by.

“Don’t mind him. He’s just on edge about the syndicate case,” Kirishima whispered, though you knew Bakugou’s sharp hearing likely picked it up. His glare confirmed it, but he didn’t say anything, turning his attention to the map on the table instead. Red pins clustered like a rash, each marking a hit by the crime syndicate that had every department in the city scrambling.

The realization hit you hard. The stakes were higher than ever, and the idea of fumbling now made your stomach churn. The last thing you needed was to mess up in front of Bakugou and Kirishima, especially when the latter’s optimism made you want to do better and the former’s disdain made you feel like you never could.

Bakugou laid out the plan, his voice cutting through the thick tension in the room. "..'nd if we’re lucky, tonight’s stakeout’ll give us what we need.” He turned to you, eyes narrowing to twin blades. “That clear, rookie?”

“Crystal,” you muttered, earning a sharp nod.

As Kirishima checked the comms equipment, you shifted on your feet, the weight of what was coming pressing against your chest like a vice. The quiet hum of urgency filled the room as you prepared for the night ahead, a stakeout that promised no sleep, a test of patience, and a confined space with Bakugou’s intensity smoldering beside you.

Yeah. You're soo fucked.

[physalian]

“Why doesn’t the villain just kill the heroes?”

Ah, plot armor. If you want to be a real go-getter and think up a more creative way for the heroes to always narrowly escape death out of sheer dumb luck, the villain being too slow on the draw, or the villain simply not thinking of it in the moment, you have to come up with a reason for why the villain doesn’t just kill the hero.

Four examples today.

1. Zhao & Aang

In “The Blue Spirit,” Aang is captured by Zhao, a man normally not above anything to further his agenda, including murder. The Avatar is the largest obstacle in his way, second to the Earth Kingdom, and all he has to do to take Aang off the gameboard is to kill a twelve-year-old. He’s got Aang in chains, not quite powerless but harmless enough, and could do it quickly.

So why doesn’t he? Per Zhao himself, if he kills Aang, the Avatar cycle will continue, born into some random water bender that may take them years to track down. Sure, they’ll be harmless for a few years and the Fire Nation might get lucky and find them easily, perhaps even sway the new one to their side, but what if the waterbending Avatar is born into the Foggy Swamp? Or they end up having to kill them, too, and then have to track down an earthbending Avtar across the entire Earth Kingdom? Does Zhao really want to take that chance when he can just keep Aang alive? Just barely?

Of course not.

Killing the hero in this case might stop the immediate threat, but it will just delay the inevitable, thus it’s in the villain’s best interest to exploit a loophole while likely committing war crimes in the process. He gets to secure a Fire Nation victory and make Aang suffer for the rest of his life.

Ozai doesn't kill Aang until the first chance he gets, which just so happens to be the series finale. And we all know why Aang has a no-kill policy.

2. Sam, Dean & The Angels and Demons

Hahaha it’s the show known for its refusal to kill its heroes. We’re gonna ignore everything past season 5. There’s obviously meta reasons—kill the main characters and you have zero supporting cast that could realistically take over the show.

But in season 4, despite multiple deaths already for both of them, so begins the “if you die we’ll just bring you back” threat, because they’re angels and angels can do that. Similar to Aang, Sam and Dean risk a fate far worse than death if they don’t cooperate with Zachariah’s plans. He happily gives them both a slew of diseases and illnesses to get his way whenever he gets the chance and reminds them both that if they just kill themselves to escape the Apocalypse, he’ll happily revive them. The Demons won't kill Sam and Dean because they're necessary to further their own plans by breaking certain seals on Lucifer's cage, though they're not above breaking bones and killing bystanders.

Fate worse than death is a popular threat, but usually the heroes offing themselves is still a viable, if deeply unpopular, option. Supernatural removes it entirely and for such a simple little detail, it does a lot to make their survivability believable.

3. Batman & Joker

Ahh the age old furious rant by people who don’t understand Batman: If Batman killed his villains they’d stop busting out of Arkham and murdering innocent civilians, Batman has so much blood on his hands—

Babe. Babe, he’s a comic book character. By his very nature, he can’t kill his villains otherwise he’d have no rogues gallery. Comic books are like a giant board of Monopoly, going around in circles and occasionally having a timeout in jail.

But the in universe reason there’s no killing has been essayed about extensively and so has why Joker doesn’t try harder to kill him, but I couldn’t not include these two. Batman does not kill because he is not judge, jury, and executioner of his villains, most of whom have mental health issues and while they certainly know better and their crimes aren’t justified, his villains need actual therapy and help and medication, not death. Even those who he might agree must be stopped and there’s no other way except murder, Batman himself will not be the one to pull the trigger. He must remain a hero, so that no matter who he comes across in the dark alleyways of Gotham, they know he’s not here to kill them, be it criminal or victim.

Joker doesn’t kill Batman for a much simpler reason, and Heath Ledger literally says it: “I won’t kill you because you’re too much fun.” He does not need a more convoluted reason, he enjoys the game, the chase, the tug of war (most versions of him, at least) and to kill Batman would be to end his greatest form of entertainment, and the only person probably in the whole world who is neither afraid of Joker nor dismissive of him as simply a freak.

4. Optimus and Megatron

Optimus Prime and Megatron are very similar to Batman and Joker but with literal eons of history between them. In most serialized Transformers media, as opposed to movies where the plot is more urgent, Megatron both wants to win Optimus over and just can't quite let himself finally win. Who is he without his rival, after all this time?

Optimus is in the same boat, refusing to kill him because he's still holding out hope for Megatron's redemption, that there's a peaceful way to end this war (no matter how much collateral both leaders end up causing). Shit gets real whenever Optimus breaks the unspoken rules of their no-kill rivalry and Megatron gets incredibly pissy about it because he's in love.

—

Suggestions to workshop this plot hole in your own narrative:

The hero staying alive is absolutely paramount to the villain’s plan (in which case, you have to have rock solid reasons for why they keep narrowly escaping capture)

The villain is so confident in their plan that they don’t even consider the hero a proper threat

The villain doesn't really have a bodycount, but if they kill the hero, suddenly all the other powers that be will take them seriously and they'll have a huge mess on their hands

The villain is so full of themselves or so in love with their rival that it’d break their heart to have to kill them just to win

The villain is simply not capable of murder either physically or morally (perhaps because the hero is a child)

Killing the hero would make them a martyr and the villain would end up with a far bigger mess on their hands when the lone hero is replaced with an avenging army

The villain is too proud to simply kill the hero and wants to win fairly in a proper fight on the battlefield and not take the cheap and easy shot

The villain does not have a phyiscal form or real presence in the plot, acting through their minions, and their minions are incompetent

It’s simply not fun if the hero dies/the hero is the only one who understands them and they’d lose far more than they’d gain by killing them

The villain still wants to try and win the hero over and is so dedicated to this path that they regularly sabotage their own plans desperate to change the hero’s mind

The villain firmly believes in a fate worse than death and while the hero’s survival isn’t crucial to the main plan, they want the hero to watch their own failure/become the villain’s minion/ prisoner/ partner by the end

There’s a million examples out there to pull from and I could keep listing them all night. So long as whatever it is doesn’t come out of nowhere or open a plot hole of “why didn’t they just do that earlier?” you can get quite creative.

One last example that’s a personal favorite of mine to implement: In Eternal Night of the Northern Sky there aren’t too many opportunities to ask this question, but when it does arise, Villain A has Hero B as a meat shield, and while Hero B’s love interest, Hero C, is more than happy to shoot through them to incapacitate Villain A, the person they take orders from isn’t so reckless, which later leads to Drama and Issues.

[macgyvermedical]

My Experience in Inpatient Psych

So I know a lot of people on here have talked about their experience in inpatient psych facilities, but I'd like to add mine just to give all you writers out there a writer-focused one. It's below the cut just in case you have to sit this one out for your own reasons.

To give you some background, I am 30 years old and have had hallucinations since about 16 and bizarre intrusive thoughts (someone living in my house that wasn't supposed to be there, somebody poisoned my walls, etc...) for about a decade, as well as very severe anxiety since I was about 3 years old. This is something not a lot of people know about me, even people I am friends with IRL.

The only thing I am actually diagnosed with is anxiety, which I'm starting to think is a failing of the psych systems I have been a part of. I have had counseling off and on and prior to this hospitalization I took escitalopram, aripiprazole, and gabapentin prescribed by my primary care doctor- all for the severe anxiety.

Quite frankly, I should have been in inpatient psych at least a few times before this, and it's by sheer dumb luck that I've survived to continue this blog.

On Friday, I was at home alone and made a few pretty bad decisions. I wont say what they were because frankly they're embarrassing, but they have to do with self-harm. I was scheduled to work Saturday and at about 9pm I realized that if I drove myself to work I would crash my car. Since my wife drives me sometimes, I figured I would just ask her to.

I told my wife and she asked- even if she drove me to work, since I was a nurse, would I be able to keep myself safe around insulin or other potentially dangerous drugs? I couldn't answer that question. We talked for a couple hours and came to the conclusion that I probably needed to go to the emergency department.

At this point I figured they would evaluate me and release me because I couldn't possibly meet the criteria for inpatient. I was wrong in this assumption. After telling them the decisions I had made that day, the feelings of wanting to die in a car crash, plus about a previous attempt, they recommended inpatient. Turns out, when you're a nurse, you can make some really bad life choices with the knowledge you have, and they didn't want to take any chances.

I was given paper scrubs to wear (so I couldn't hurt myself with my clothing or a hospital gown). I was also given a patient companion (someone who sits in the room and makes sure you don't hurt yourself).

They gave me the option of signing myself in voluntarily, or putting me on a writ of detention. A writ of detention is a piece of paperwork that allows a medical professional or law enforcement officer to hold someone for 3 days in a psychiatric facility against the person's will for the purposes of psychiatric treatment. Whether you sign the voluntary or get placed on a writ, you cannot sign yourself out. You need to wait until the psychiatrist taking care of you thinks you're ready to go.

I didn't believe at this point I needed to go inpatient, but I took the voluntary option because there are some perks, like being able to leave within 3 days if appropriate. At this point I was convinced I was probably going to have to call off work Saturday and Sunday, probably be out of the hospital Monday, have a few days to rest and be back at work on my next scheduled shift after that, which was Thursday.

Well, that's not what happened.

Because of some of the decisions I had made, along with bed availability, they wanted to keep me in the observation unit overnight before they sent me to psych. I stayed overnight in a unit that shares staff with the unit I work on, so I was taken care of by my coworkers. This was surprisingly not that bad. I like my coworkers and they were really professional about it.

Saturday I felt like I was in a fog all day. I couldn't watch TV. I couldn't color or write. I worked out some in my hospital room and paced the halls once or twice. Mostly I hung out with my wife and occasionally talked with my companion, but even talking was difficult. I had refused ativan because I felt like I had no hope of finding a medication that made me feel better, and I figured I didn't want to take the one medication that might actually work and then not be able to get it ever again.

Around 7PM I took a 45 minute ambulance ride to the facility. Getting my blood pressure taken is a big anxiety trigger for me, but my brain felt so scrambled that I couldn't express this well. They took it every 10 minutes on the ride there and by the time I got there it was in the 170s/100s (BP goes up when you're having severe anxiety). This was not their fault of course, but no matter how much I thought about telling them or refusing the BPs, I just couldn't do it.

When I got to the facility I was greeted by a tech who took my BP again (150s/90s this time), showed me around and looked through my personal belongings (basically just the clothing I came in with since my wife took my phone and wallet knowing I wouldn't be able to have them on the unit) to make sure I didn't have anything I wasn't allowed to on the unit. She showed me around my room and was really thorough with telling me how things worked, what the rules were, etc..

The rules included:

No patients allowed in other patients rooms

No personal belongings that had strings, belts, or laces, or that could be used as a weapon

No caffeine after lunch and no free access to caffeine

No personal electronics (including eReaders and watches). There was a TV in the day room and 2 phones mounted to the wall for patient use

A little later my nurse came into my room and asked me a ton of questions. Here's the thing about any hospital- you get asked the same questions over and over. By the time I'd gotten there I could give my story in under a minute. Or at least, that's what it felt like. There were only 2 clocks on the unit, at the nurses stations.

The unit itself was laid out in a "T" shape. There was a main nurse's station at the place where the two hallways intersected. At the end of the long hallway there was another smaller nurses station, a cafeteria/day room, and a "comfort room" which was a small room off the day room that had a collection of the oldest and worst donated books that have every come together on a bookshelf.

I did some pacing that night and then went to bed, but didn't sleep particularly well.

On Sunday morning the tech woke me up to take my blood pressure, which was, not unsurprisingly, still high. It was about 5 AM so I got up and paced the longer of the corridors for about an hour. Breakfast was served at 8 and the food wasn't that bad. The coffee was about the worst I'd ever drank, which I suppose helped with the no caffeine goals.

Just after breakfast I met with a psychiatrist on an iPad for about half a minute, and I'm not exaggerating there. The only questions he asked were whether I was suicidal and whether I would be fine with tripling my dose of aripiprazole in light of the hallucinations. I had had a 50-lb weight gain in the last year so I asked to switch my med. He switched the med to cariprazine. That was all.

I had a much longer meeting with my nurse later. All the nurses did an excellent job of assessing me, asked tons of questions, and it seemed like they really tried to figure out what was going on. That day I also met with a social worker, and a therapist, and a nurse practitioner. Each of them did an assessment to see what my needs were while I was there.

There was also a music therapy session where I cried my eyes out to Because of You by Kelly Clarkson.

I was really tired by the end of the day but I also didn't think I could sleep so I asked for trazodone. I should clarify that when I say "I" in this piece I really mean my wife convinced me to ask because I legitimately didn't believe I needed or deserved any of the things I asked for at this point. To my utter shock and surprise, they gave me the trazodone.

My first night on trazodone was amazing and I realized I hadn't slept well in a long time. With trazodone I fell asleep and stayed asleep until the blood pressure cart came rolling down the hallway at 5am. The second I got up on Monday morning I was wide awake.

I paced a lot Monday. I went to a goals session in the morning where I gave a goal to write 3/4 of a page. I didn't know if I could do it or what I was even going to write about, but I know I like to write and it might be a reasonable introduction to getting back to life.

I also was having kind of a rough day brain-wise. My brain was coming up with all the ways I could hurt myself in my room. There weren't a lot of them, but it was trying. I told the nurse during her assessment and she asked if I felt I could keep myself safe. I asked her what she would do if I said no. She said they could move me to a more secure part of the unit and give me more supervision. I knew what part of the unit she was talking about, and I didn't want to go there (no space to pace, and pacing was keeping me alive right then). So I told her I could keep myself safe (if anything, the idea of moving was good motivation to do stay safe in itself). I hallucinated some black and white blood cells falling from the ceiling and music coming out of my vents.

I also had another meeting with the social worker to figure out discharge plans. I voiced in the meeting that I wasn't sure that I could trust my wife, since it felt like at the time she was the one who exaggerated my symptoms to get me in here. The social worker said we had really good communication skills, since this was something I felt needed to be said in front of both of them and we both stayed really calm through the whole thing.

I finished the day with an art therapy session that really helped me turn a corner. The prompt was to draw the emotion(s) you felt right now on one side of the paper, and to draw the emotions you wished you could feel on the other side. For the first time I realized that my emotional state was actually really bad and that the suicidality hadn't come out of nowhere, and that I needed help.

When my wife came to visit later that night I was able to tell her about my breakthrough, even though I still felt a little bit like she had done something to get me in here and I still wasn't sure I needed to be inpatient.

Tuesday was a lot better. I felt like I had woken up out of some kind of fog and I had no idea how long I'd been in it. I went to goals group, a spiritual group, and group occupational therapy. My goal was to be more social and I made a friend and we paced together and worked out. I read a quarter of The Martian by Andy Weir (my wife brought it for me because the best thing on the bookshelf was Louis L'Amour). I wrote about how good I suddenly felt. Turns out, I thought, a few days of good sleep, lots of therapy, and a new medication or two will really change things.

A quick side note about The Martian. I highly recommend it to anyone who is chilling in a psych hospital but has the ability to read while they're there (I sure didn't the first few days). I don't really know why, but the first few times I read it, I felt like they had created this superhuman character in Mark Watney just so they could throw a ton of wild things at him for the story. This time reading it, as a suddenly not suicidal person, I realized anyone with Mark's skill would have done the same thing and not just died on Sol 7 to get it over with.

Wednesday I woke up not feeling nearly as good as Tuesday, but still like the fog had lifted. I was a little disappointed (I hallucinated my cat (thanks for coming to visit me, Corina), some spiders, and just felt kinda meh. But I remembered how good I felt the day before, and that really kept me hopeful about going home.

I saw the psychiatrist again and asked to go home. He joked a little about me staying till Christmas, but ultimately he said as soon as his note was in I could go. I ended up leaving at about 12:30 with my wife.

In the time since leaving I have required a lot of support from my wife. The medications are all locked up, so are the blades and anything I could use to hurt myself. My wife has me in eyeshot at all times. I can't drive due to intrusive thoughts, so she does all the driving now. I quit my job because I feel like it was a big part of why I ended up as bad as I was. As someone who has been a pretty independent person this is a big change of pace, but something that is really necessary to my healing.

Ultimately at the end of my hospital stay, I was prescribed escitalopram, gabapentin, trazodone, cariprazine, and then a few days later propranolol. I'm currently on a total of 5 psych meds and honestly I don't care one bit because its so much better than being not on them at this point in my life.

[adreamingofguns]

oooh what do you think people get wrong about hoffman and gordon??

OH BOY. Starting with Hoffman, people who characterize him as a daddy dom miss the character entirely. This man is a sub. Put this man in a dog collar immediately. in all seriousness, I also think the characterization of him being a murder maniac also feels... Wrong. We see him getting rid of everything, id and so on, and that feels... Final, to me. Like his Hoffmanator Murder Spree was not intended to be survivable, and only through sheer dumb luck did he manage to live (and because the cops in Jigsaw City are like. Very bad at their jobs). I also think that Hoffman is an extremely lonely man who WANTS to help people (his volunteers of America mug for sure, but also the fact that he comforted Corbett Denlon with a stuffed animal when he didn't have to, and the fact that out of everyone, he is the Only apprentice to target multiple white supremacists) and who only really sticks around because John was leading him with affection like a horse with a carrot on a string. We see this textually when John is encouraging Mark by touching his shoulder in a parental sort of way. I think Hoffman is passively suicidal throughout most of the series because it's the only thing that makes a Lot of his decisions make sense. Also kinda fucked up to make a suicidal guy go after a suicidal target, John.

ALSO THE WHOLE SLOB HOFFMAN THING. This man redecorated his house, this man has an ART NOOK and tasteful black leather that goes with his dark cherry or mahogany furniture. This man wears suits even when he doesn't have to. This man probably smells amazing. And he's fat. Stop drawing him skinny.

ALSO Lawrence is canonically a misogynist with a criminal record who either a) punches walls or b) fights people. This is in text, in the script and in the video games (which ARE canon). Lawrence kinda sucks and he FROM THE BEGINNING doesnt think John is a murderer, so him disagreeing with jigsaw is ooc because he canonically in the movie says "jigsaw doesnt kill people". I think also Lawrence is convinced of how jigsaw does actually help, which is why he goes to the meetings. ALSO LAWRENCE DID THE BOBBY DAGEN GAMES IN MY HEART WHICH KILLED JOYCE BECAUSE HES A MISOGYNIST. Lawrence sucks SO bad as a person, but as a character he's so compelling.

IN FACT STOP DRAWING LAWRENCE SKINNY TOO

[halcome]

Oh gods I didn't even realize it was Saturday, new Wild Life ep let's go!!! Wooo!!!

(reacting as I watch below)

Gonna do my heart a favor and just edit this post as I watch, seems to be a calm session but with the speed mechanics its only a matter of time before I see someone run off a cliff. Still recovering from the snails, small morsels of content are a must.

Grian's Wild Life Ep. 4

Grian and Mumbo doing their best to help Skizz murder is a delight as always, but I feel like their plans always seem to benefit them in the end and not Skizz.

Already terrified of the minecart cannon Grian made and I dont think theyre fast enough yet to launch it far.

Made some breakfast, some scrambled eggs with peppers and a side of, OMG SCAR

I probs should've guessed he'd immediately put a tnt minecart down to test it but everyone was so close by, gave me a lil scare. Also does Mumbo not have self preservation instincts? Cause everyone backed up but he kept staring at it, barely inching away. Guessing his redstone and curiosity instincts were stronger than his need to stay yellow.

Grian: Mumbo, is the moon fast?

Omg he said the line!

If I remember correctly speed + tnt minecart = more power, Grian holding up a shield was a good effort but dear lord that was quite the death.

Genuinely, what on earth just happened?

Mumbo died the most Looney Toon death I've ever seen, running for water and turned to ash. Scar was an absolute menace too, shooting Grian off that ledge was a very Hot Guy move. I wonder if he'll make it to the very end? I know Grian's targeting Scar now but something tells me he's gonna survive by sheer dumb luck.

SmallishBeans' Wild Life Ep. 4

Cool guys don't look at explosions! Something, something, TNT takes 4 seconds to explode. Timings are demolished.

8:00 Joel on his ballerina arc.

Took a break to finish homework, came back to Jimmy trying to take a chunk out of Joel's "somewhere" ??? Usual shenanigans it seems.

Seen Skizz frolicking in the sunflowers twice now from 2 different viewpoints, he's really enjoying his time on a death game server, proud of em.

Absolutely loving how proud everyone is of Mumbo getting a kill, always nice to see the little reminders that even though this is a death game of bloodshed and betrayal they're still friends in the end. Though I have seen clips of Bdubs holding grudges, so while everyone is friend shaped, they are not forgive and forget shaped.

Joel giving so many diamonds to Lizzie is incredible. Man's forever smitten with his missus. Lizzie the absolute queen!

Absolute chaos at the end with how Joel edited it. I know it was technical difficulties but it just fits so well with how chaotic it was.

Mumbo Jumbo's Wild Life Ep. 4

I know Mumbo placed the creeper from Grian's POV but goodness he's a little rascal given the chance.

Omg that Scott kill though was smooth as heck. He waited so long and it paid off big time. Little block break and plop, there goes the Scott! Absolutely loved how simple it went, the silence from Scott as his brain caught up to him was amazing too. I gotta watch his POV next for sure!

Is it just me or is Mumbo really going after Scott? Tasted blood and immediately became addicted to the one source. If Mumbo ends up being the reason Scott's out of the series ima laugh. The amount of paranoia Scott would have by the end of it would be immense.

And he gave up... Welp, can't wait to see him try and kill Gem next session!

[charlie-pippin-faraday]

i've reached the investigation portion of danganronpa v3 chapter 2, which is the last point to which i had watched youtube content and thus everything beyond will be new to me. my chapter 2 commentary thus far:

kaito really just decided that he and shuichi were going to be best friends and shuichi didn't have any choice in the matter lol

nobody needed to tell me that kaito was the one incessantly ringing my doorbell, i knew it was him lol

i have been referring to tenko, himiko, and angie as "the girlies" and i am 100% confident that every single one of them is going to die before this game is over

lmao shuichi asking himiko "how have you survived this long?" same bro i also wonder this about her

kaito threatening to slug kokichi and then kokichi literally bolting out of the room is the realest thing that has happened in this game so far

i've made a habit of clicking on ALL the characters every free time to see if they have any fun dialogue before i choose who i actually spend free time with. on i think the first free time slot in chapter 2 i went to kokichi who said something about being scared that kaito had caught up to him because he was afraid he was gonna slug him (or something along those lines), and then when i talked to kaito he immediately said "you seen kokichi around anywhere?" implying he had indeed been looking for him to deliver said slugging. made me laugh my fucking ASS off

by sheer dumb luck, i had gotten the parasol from the monomono machine in chapter 1, so i was able to talk to tenko before doing the flashback light scene in the gym and unknowingly unlock what i later found out was one of the secret scenes (and let me tell you i was delighted by this development and that it happened naturally). and thus i was able to witness ~the girlies and keebo at the pool~. subsequently, i have SO many questions lol. tenko kind of implied that she kind of wanted just to hang with himiko, and angie was probably there because himiko invited her and tenko can't say no to himiko, but why did tenko invite keebo? lmao tenko you're such a hot mess

during the free time session i was planning on hanging with kaito first, but then i spoke to keebo and he asked so vulnerably "shuichi if you have free time would you like to spend it with me? there's something i want to ask you" and i changed my plans SO fast i would die for you keebo

"maybe someone like miu would appreciate his mechanics" shuichi you're not trying to play matchmaker are you?

lmao there was a stark difference in shuichi's reactions to that day's free time events with keebo and with kaito, both of which involved them talking about their skills/stuff they'd learned. about keebo, shuichi said "okay...he's weird and i don't understand him." about kaito, shuichi said "wow, kaito's incredible!" these were incredibly similar interactions. lol okay tell me how you really feel shuichi. you can't tell me he doesn't have at least a little bit of a crush on kaito

hm a "gyoza in the shape of a face - a dumpling that's modeled after someone you swear you've seen somewhere before." hm gee i wonder who that could be. (definitely doesn't look like makoto naegi or anything. haunting the narrative much?)

the fact that korekiyo was definitely in the top half of most reasonable people i spoke to in this chapter is a sign that the world has been flipped upside down

every one of these games has had one weird, obsessive, one-sided, and likely ill-fated romance, and i knew this time it would be tenko's weird thing for himiko. i can't believe i'm saying this but i feel a little bad for tenko. a little, at least. i get the feeling i won't be feeling bad for her in the future. for whatever reason, i get the sinking feeling that in a future chapter this obsession with himiko and her jealousy over himiko spending time with angie is going to end with tenko snapping and someone ending up dead

actually why is everyone obsessed with himiko? tenko claims to care for her and wants to support her and believe in her magic, and she definitely wants to get in her pants, and angie also wants to be friends with her and has successfully brainwashed her to her atua cult and convinced her to put on a dangerous magic show. and like, why? himiko is not that cool, she's lame and pathetic. she eats termites on accident, can barely go to the bathroom by herself, and is super fucking lazy and uncooperative. i get that she's afraid/sad and is susceptible to brainwashing (she's not the only one here easily manipulated *cough cough* gonta), that part's understandable and i'll give her a pass, but like what is she bringing to the table? i don't get why all the girlies are obsessed with her. i'm with shuichi on the "how did you survive this long?" train of thought. i'm torn between "tenko you deserve better" and "all 3 of you toxic girlies fucking deserve each other"

definitely my favorite event thus far has been miu and da boyz clowning on kaito in the casino. true teenage bonding experience. (and i mean da boyz literally, all the boys who were alive were present except gonta and keebo, who is only debatably a boy.)

"i guess you can't underestimate luck" you did it, you boiled down the entire character of makoto naegi to one sentence

but fr tho every time someone utters the word "luck," "hope," or "despair" in danganronpa games i feel myself suddenly at FULL attention, like those words aren't there by accident, there's always hidden meaning there. and i am once again wondering at the lore/secret behind this particular game, i still don't know what it is

immediately after this casino event is when i finally spent free time with miu. it was the first time i'd approached her as shuichi and she didn't threaten me. and she was even in the casino when i approached her! where we'd already spent time together clowning on kaito! so it was perfect timing

speaking of miu, she needs to get laid SO bad. maybe she'd chill out. like she acts like she's had a bunch of sex but given how much she talks about it there's no fucking way she's gotten laid, she's absolutely projecting her insecurities. someone nail this girl please it's what she needs and tbh it's what we all need. side note: kiyo telling her to stfu in the casino was fucking hilarious lol

question do the friendship fragments not carry over from kaede to shuichi? i had updated report cards from hanging with gonta, keebo, and maki as kaede, but they're not there anymore. do i not get to keep the friendship fragments that i earned from them?

another question, was i just not allowed to hang out with maki in chapter 2? every time i approached her during free time she fucking threatened me. did i the player do something to lock her out or is that simply not allowed?

bro tenko is gonna fucking lose her mind. i approached her in i think the last free time and she was just muttering himiko's name over and over again, big yikes. and then "my saliva makes injuries heal faster can i spit on you" girl what???

i think tenko needs to move on, perhaps to one of the other girls. miu, perhaps? if they could fuck i think this would solve some problems for both of them

in the bug room, kokichi said something about a "mean" difficulty and not being a coward in the killing game and i felt so called out lol, because i have all the trial action set to be as easy as possible lmaooo

keebo my beloved saved the day in the bug room and got the first major non-verbal victory in the keebo vs. kokichi war. i'm proud of him, but this will definitely not be the last of it

i do wonder what "snafu" kokichi was referring to when he was running around that caused him to be late returning to the bug room. they never addressed that, and i hope they get to it during the trial

bro did kokichi get rabies or something???? right before the magic show, gonta said kokichi wasn't there because in the bug room his mouth bubbled and then he passed out lmaooooooooooo

what were kaito and maki up to this entire time? making out? aside from ryoma, they were the only ones who were absent from both the bug room and the magic show. miu and kirumi weren't in the bug room, and kokichi wasn't at the magic show and left the bug room for a portion of time, but those two were nowhere to be seen for any portion of both events. i need some answers

noooo don't use keebo as a battering ram!!! that's so rude!!! kokichi definitely won that particular battle in the keebo vs. kokichi war, and we are nowhere near over. i want to see where this rivalry goes, 'cause tbh i think it's secretly the most tense one here

bro i hate himiko uuuuuugggghhhhh. "we need you to tell us how your trick worked so we can figure out how the culprit killed ryoma." "i can't tell you, i did it with my magic and that's the only answer you're getting" god shut the fuck up you're annoying and unhelpful and you never listen and you're actively getting in the way i want one of these dudes to punch you

i have some HEAVY suspicions about who i think is the culprit. and tbh i've held these suspicions since before i even played the game, back when i just watched some youtube content up to this murder. i don't know what will happen from this point forward, but if i'm right about who i think did it, i am gonna be SO stoked about it

[a-dinosaur-a-day]

Fossil Novembirb 2: The Survivors

The End-Cretaceous Extinction was one of the most devastating - and tragic - events on our planet.

In the blink of an eye, the world changed from a thriving biosphere to a decimated one. The asteroid caused worldwide wildfires, tsunamis, and the dramatic release of particles into the air that blocked out the sun.

Nothing over 25 kg could survive, because they had nowhere to hide from the devastation. Anything under that limit had to have somewhere to hide - water or burrowing worked best - and something to eat, which was easier said than done. When the plants can't eat, nothing can.

And yet, life survived - not just life, but dinosaurs themselves!

Conflicto, by @otussketching

In fact, one of the first fossils we have from the Cenozoic is Conflicto, a Presbyornithid - like "Styginetta" and Teviornis yesterday! - from Antarctica

Why these dinosaurs, and no others?

They had beaks, which would have helped them to access available food sources such as seeds and spores (plant material in a protective casing)

They did not live in trees, but usually near or with water - perfect places to hide

They were powerful fliers, allowing them to escape the flames and whatever else they needed to

Other than that? Random chance.

Much of the evolution of life on this planet is down to Sheer Dumb Luck

Tsidiiyazhi by Sean Murtha

What happened next was truly remarkable: an adaptive radiation of dinosaurs the likes of which is rarely seen

With all of those newly opened niches, Neornithines adapted quickly, so quickly we can't actually figure out how different major groups of Neoavians - aka, most birds - actually relate to one another.

After all, there was just *so much* free real estate!

Qianshanornis by @alphynix

In fact, many of these dinosaurs evolved right back into niches that their ancestors had famously lived in - penguins show up so quickly that we're giving marine birds their own day, replacing the now-lost Hesperornithines; Tsidiiyazhi and others quickly replaced the empty tree-bird niches left behind by the lost Enantiornithines; and raptors show up quickly too, already reminiscent of the lost Dromaeosaurs.

Qianshanornis, a mysterious raptor from China, had sickle claws just like its lost bretheren! In fact, it looks like it might be a Cariamiform, a group of dinosaurs including living Seriemas and the extinct Terror Birds, which often have sickle claws like Dromaeosaurs did!

Don't fix what isn't broken, I guess!

Australornis by @thewoodparable

Non-Neoavians diversified too, with fowl doing just fine across the boundary - Presbyornithids like Conflicto, as well as mysterious forms like Australornis.

Palaeognaths remain weirdly absent, but don't worry - the earilest ones will show up before the Paleocene epoch is done!

The Cenozoic begins with the Paleogene Period, which has the first epoch of the Paleocene - this was a climatic quagmire, with frequent fluctuations at the beginning before a dramatic rise in temperatures at the end. This climate confusion would affect bird evolution greatly - and lead to the diversification of many kinds, some of which we still have today!

Sources:

Ksepka, D. T., T. A. Stidham, T. E. Williamson. 2017. Early Paleocene landbird supports rapid phylogenetic and morphological diversification of crown birds after the K-PG mass extinction. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America 114 (30): 8047 - 8052.

Mayr, 2022. Paleogene Fossil Birds, 2nd Edition. Springer Cham.

Mayr, 2017. Avian Evolution: The Fossil Record of Birds and its Paleobiological Significance (TOPA Topics in Paleobiology). Wiley Blackwell.

[rayshippouuchiha]

Ray - Kakanaru prompt.

Uzumaki Naruto had a lot of fears growing up. Fears like ghosts, thiefs, villagers, him fading away and no one noticing, him losing people he considers his family, needles, for a while Orochimaru and snakes etc.

The one fear he was never able to outgrow, a fear that unlike everything else didn't fade away or turn into a life lesson, despite facing missing nin, reanimated PPL, tailed beasts, controlled allies, sentient plant matter, and a freaking alien is the fear of ghosts.

It would all have been fine. Maybe even something the others could have an incredulous laugh on except it's not fine when this critical information is revealed in the midst of a C turned deadly SS rank mission with Kakashi and Naruto separated from the rest of the team and transported to a new place,facing what is essentially seeming to be an encounter with the paranormal.

It is certainly not hilarious when someone who is essentially the saviour of the shinobi world starts collapsing at the seams, his body, mind and chakra reacting catastrophically to a threat only he perceives. The worst part is that Kurama isn't putting a stop to his host's idioticy. (Not my personal pov. This is strictly from Kakashi's view)

Or- Kakashi is a bastard. Naruto keeps way too many things hidden. Their relationship suffered and since then never repaired when Naruto met Tsunade and Shizune and understood the true meaning of the term sensei and mentor. And Kakashi- like every other time in his life - when he saw one of the few good things in his life spilling from his hand like grains of sand didn't bother closing his fist until it was too late.

Or- Naruto has Phasmophobia and much like everything else this ties back into his shitty childhood in Konoha. Kurama knows everything. And there have always been spirits and supernatural at play when it concerned Naruto. It was not sheer dumb luck or resilience that helped him survive Konoha after all.

There is a reason children shouldn't be left unsupervised. And now the others can only watch as these forces take away what is rightfully theirs.

fuck I'd read the shit out of this

[hmshermitcraft]

'Who would survive in a zombie apocalypse?' is a question the hermits ask far too much for having a resident zombie.

Every hermit has their crazy made-up theories saying it'd be them (except Cleo. She has an actually good argument as to why they'd 'survive') but no one actually thinks they would.

It'd either be someone who can fly, Xisuma, Etho, Bdubs or Scar.

X and Etho have masks, they're not going to breathe zombie air. But that'd only kill them faster. Mask = Less oxygen and less oxygen = quicker death

Bdubs is small. He can get into spaces most people can't. But that has its downsides too. He could get surrounded, run out of supplies and he'd die a horrible, slow death.

Flight would be helpful, but only while you have the energy to.

Scar would either breathe in the vicinity of a zombie and die instantly or survive out of sheer dumb luck.

The hermits know it'll probably never happen, but it's fun for them to imagine. And it ends up different every time! Once they even managed to get Cleo to be the last survivor! And the start of the infection!

It's become a ridiculous team building exercise for them. Every time somebody brings up the discussion, it turns out people have come up with numerous new arguments as to why they or another hermit would survive.

Some of the more noteworthy examples:

"Joe just would, I don't know." - contributed by Cleo

"Hypno shows so little skin, a zombie couldn't bite him." - argued that the infection could be airborne, so that wouldn't count

"Zed wouldn't even notice." - contributed by Tango, in a very tired voice

"Zed would be experimenting on the zombies." - contributed by Impulse, sounding equally as tired

"Bdubs is so short, no zombie is going to lean down far enough to bite him." - from Etho, this led to an hour of arguing (from Bdubs.)

"Mumbo would just build a vault." - from Iskall.

The addition of Joel and Skizz kept them going for weeks with new ideas. Every date night eventually devolved into 'the zombie discussion'. There was no escaping it. Just like, some might say, a zombie infection.

[ohnoitstbskyen]

one piece live action thoughts?

It looks very much like a live action adaptation of One Piece. For better, and very much also for worse.

I mean this in the sense that it's adapted to fit a form that helps it make sense 1) in live action and 2) to a general audience which isn't intimately familiar with manga or anime, and which a broadcaster or streaming service would want to reach.

Luffy especially, at least going by the relatively tiny snippet we have seen so far, seems to have had some of his more peculiar edges sanded off to fit more comfortably into the mold of a typical young adult protagonist, which includes the... I guess what people call "marvel speak" now? The little funny quips and asides and ironic saying-the-obvious-thing-out-loud beats, which are more Americanisms than Marvel specific but I digress.

In One Piece, Luffy is most often not the point of view character, especially early on. Luffy is usually observed from outside by other characters - Koby serves this role in the early chapters, and from then on usually we see Luffy through his crew, or through whatever secondary characters they're interacting with in that particular arc.

People have observed this before, but in the manga, we essentially NEVER get any internal monologue from Luffy, he always either SAYS what he's thinking, or he runs on head empty no thoughts just vibes instinct and gut reaction.

And that... probably doesn't really work with a typical young adult protagonist. If adapted faithfully to screen, I think a lot of audiences would read him as just a reckless, inconsiderate and kinda heartless asshole, because a framing and presentation of Luffy that makes sense in a manga or anime just doesn't read the same in live action filmmaking.

Like, One Piece opens with Luffy recklessly sailing off to sea despite having no idea how to sail, getting sucked into a whirlpool and surviving on sheer dumb luck, getting picked up by some pirates in a barrel. Then he meets an abused child named Koby who has been getting the shit kicked out of him daily for months and immediately calls him a clumsy, stupid, cowardly worthless loser to his face and laughs at him.

Like, if you adapted that faithfully, how would that come across to a general audience? Imagine this scene staged in live-action, with human actors having to portray this conversation rather than stylized cartoon people. It simply wouldn't come across the same way, Luffy would come across as an It's Always Sunny character at best. Why would a general audience sympathize with him? Why would they find him compelling or worth investing emotionally in?

And I'm not saying there aren't ways to adapt One Piece faithfully into live action, there absolutely are (much like the manga, I would make everyone ELSE the point-of-view characters looking AT Luffy rather than try and present him as a Likeable Protagonist, for example).

My point is just that in any translation into live action, there are going to be concessions to the medium, there are going to be concessions to film language, concessions to audience expectations, concessions to the market conditions, concessions to the studio funding the filming, and so on. That's just the nature of the endeavour.

When it's done well, you get an adaptation that preserves the spirit of the thing while fitting its medium. Lord of the Rings comes to mind, an adaptation which changed huge amounts from its source material, but preserved the spirit.

When it's done poorly you get... well, Cowboy Bebop on Netflix.

I don't know from the tiny trailer snippet we've seen whether this show will preserve the spirit of One Piece, it very well may not, and end up another victim on the pile of bad anime adaptations. But I don't think the fact that it changed the vibe of the characters or Main Character'd Luffy alone are reasons to dismiss it, at least not yet. Those might have been necessary concessions for the show to work in live action at all. We shall see.

I'm not super optimistic or excited (because, again, I remember Cowboy Bebop), but I'm not despairing of it yet either.

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

So did season 3 Zuko genuinely believe Ozai loved Azula? Is that why he was okay with ratting her out to him with no fear of what he might do to her?

Zuko is a 16-year-old boy that was a victim of abuse pretty much his entire life. It took him THREE WHOLE YEARS to realize that their father disfiguring and banishing him for speaking out of turn/against a cruel plan, and refusing to fight him, was, in fact, a deeply horrible thing for Ozai to do and it was all Ozai's fault.

Is it fair or realistic to expect him to understand that, even though Azula managed to live up to Ozai's insane expectations for his children, it was still unfair of him to put so much pressure on her and that it was only a matter of time before she cracked under it? Can we really blame him for not realizing Azula is being psychologically abused when she's in denial about it herself and actively trying to convince everyone around her that everything she does is effortless? And when the adults he actually trusts, aka his mother and uncle, are ALSO not aware of what's going on right in front of their faces?

Can we blame a child who is desperate to get even the slightest bit of approval and affection from his parent, and never achieving it, for thinking their sibling has an easier, enviable life because they ocasionally get some conditional love?

Can we expect someone who just heard their parent say the words "Your sister was born lucky, you were lucky to be born" to just casually ignore that very clear "I wish you were dead, you don't deserve to exist" and focus only on the implications of "Wait, is he dismissing my sibling's life-long attempts, and success, of living up to his expectations as sheer dumb luck, not hard work and genuine talent?"

I've said once, I'll say it again: Zuko's attempts to survive all the trauma he endured are basically the same as someone who is panicking while drowning and trying to pull under the person that is trying to rescue them because they cannot think clearly in such a dire situation.

It's no coincidence that the two main moments in which we see him having compassion for Azula (in The Southern Raiders and then in the finale post Agni Kai) take place AFTER he has turned his back on Ozai and found a group of people who love and support him. He is now watching the situation from the outside, from a safe distance, not while in the middle of all the chaos, unsure if he's gonna make it.

And for the first time, Zuko can actually see his sister. A prodigy, but still someone that is trying to meet impossible standards. A brave, fierce, DANGEROUS warrior, but also a deeply traumatized child.

There's a reason Aaron Ehasz, the head-writter and executive producer of the show, has repeatedly said that, if Avatar had gotten a fourth season, he would have liked Zuko to essentially be Azula's Iroh and help her heal and redeem herself. He is literally the only other person in the world that knows what being Ozai's child is like, even if he was the scapegoat while she was the golden child.

[an-idyllic-novelist]

Hi, could I request for a Lady Tamayo!Reader paired with Buddha?

This reader was revived by Brunhilde to be the doctor for the 13 champions and she's loyal (not too loyal) to her bc she saved her from her punishment from being a demon.

The scenario would be that they met when she treated him after his fight and they got to know each other after that?

Please and thank you

Here it is! Special thanks to @nixes-noxes for proofreading/editing to make sure that the characters weren’t OOC. Enjoy and have a lovely day/evening!

Warnings: manga spoilers

Buddha was…a difficult patient. Despite all of the odds that were stacked against him in his fight with Zero, he won. Yet his victory for humanity isn’t an excuse to sneak out of his room to bask underneath the canopy of his bodhi tree and enjoy a passing breeze with sun shining down from the sky.

That is one of the reasons why Brunhilde had summoned Lady [First Name] [Last Name] from Helheim despite being a demon; before she had been killed by Muzan after drugging him with an elixir during their confrontation in the Infinity Castle, Lady [First Name} had been a doctor. Together with her companion Yushiro, she helped as many humans as she could with their alignments,including those who had been afflicted with Muzan’s poisonous blood and became flesh-eating demons.

In retrospect, dying to give the Demon Slayers a chance to destroy the man who had ruined her human life wasn’t a terrible thing…but Lady [First Name] had not expected to wake up in a dark wasteland teeming with demons that were just as dangerous, if not more, than the demon king himself. It was through sheer dumb luck that she had survived for so long until the Valkyrie had brought from her ‘punishment’ and offered her the position of being humanity’s chief physician in the medical wing.

It did not take the young woman very much time to give Brunhilde an answer. At this point anything was better than being stuck in Helheim. Disinfecting wounds, monitoring a patient’s health, and making sure that they are being properly fed? Yes. She can do that.

But the demon did not recall that being the ‘chief physician’ also meant chasing after a stubborn god.

Shaking her head in disbelief, Lady [First Name] walked up the steep grassy hill as best as she could in her [Favorite Color] kimono and zori sandals till she was standing right behind Buddha, munching on snacks that she specifically recalled telling him to cut back on until he was ready for the next stage of his treatment.

“Why am I not surprised to find you here, my lord?”

“Should ya even be surprised anymore, doc?” Buddha snarked back, unwrapping a candy bar and throwing it in his mouth. “Besides, do you really believe I’d miss an opportunity to get some fresh air?”

She frowned. “I never said that there was a problem with being outside, Lord Buddha. In fact, it is supposed to improve your sleep, cognition, and overall well-being rather than being confined indoors all of the time. I did, however, say that you can but it would be in everyone’s benefit to inform myself or the staff that you wish to go outside instead of sneaking out. Lady Brunhilde was quite upset when she came to the medical wing earlier this afternoon to find out that you were…missing.”

“Bruni will be fine, she’s a lot tougher than she looks, believe me. Let her focus on the eighth round. I might have won but we still need more wins if the gods’ll leave the humans alone. More importantly,” He glanced over his shoulder, a single aquamarine orb staring right at her. “Do I even know you?”

Lady [First Name] tilted her head, staring at him for a moment before smiling softly. It appears that Lady Brunhilde was not joking when she had casually mentioned just how laid-back Buddha is…or simply doesn’t give a shit about anyone. The Valkyrie’s words, not hers, thank you very much. But being a doctor secretly researching demonic transformations or performing blood transfusions did not have its own issues. She also had to handle human patients too. Inhaling a deep breath through her nostrils, she calmed her anger before answering Buddha.

“All you need to know is that my job is to ensure the mental and physical health of all humanity’s champions, Lord Buddha. It goes against my oath as a doctor to force a patient to do something against their will. In this scenario, however, I offer…an ultimatum.” She paused, staring at the blonde-haired deity. Since Buddha didn’t interrupt nor look away, the demon took this as a cue to elaborate.

“I will speak to the staff and allow you to lounge outside here or in the greenhouse until a fixed time. When that time is up, you must return to your room and rest. Yes, this is a curfew, but this is the best that I can offer you right now. You may no longer be in critical condition, though there is a chance that your health or recovery might have some setbacks.”

She could tell immediately that Buddha wasn’t too thrilled with this restriction. No one likes having someone hovering over their shoulder or counting down the minutes until they have to go back to their room when all they want is a little time to themselves before running through medical tests for the nth time of the day.

“Is there any chance you can include snacks-”

“That will be taken into consideration once your bloodwork comes back, Lord Buddha.” Lady [First Name] chuckled, witnessing one of the most powerful gods pouting petulantly like a child. Shaking her head, she decided to do something that she hadn’t done in all of her years of practicing medicine: she sat next to him under the bodhi tree, paying no heed to getting grass stains on her kimono as she stared up at the floating islands of Valhalla in comfortable silence.

He did not say anything….that was progress. Maybe?

[wisteriainslumber]

"Get me out of here!"

aka the twst girlies surviving an escape room in honour of me being the most unhelpful person in escape rooms

warnings: swearing and book 6 spoilers in regards to ortho

first years

has the highest possibility of succeeding

it sure wouldn't look like it though

in the middle of their allotted hour, they suggested to sacrifice grim

which yuu stopped by distracting them with a loooooong story of how they are a long lost octuplet

legit no one knows if yuu is being FR or not bc it sounds so unbelievable but their facial expressions suggest they're being so deadass abt it

unanimous decision to push ace into the coffin and started holding hands and chanting

low and behold, the weight in the coffin triggered a mechanism and they accidentally solved the puzzle into the next room

here's another example, where there was a bunch of clocks on the wall w/ different times and epel joked that it looks like the heartslabyul dorm (bc of the million staircases)

and while deuce and ace were telling stories about the amount of freshmen that fell off those staircases (rip), jack stared a lil harder and figured out a password for a lock that way

the first thought that occurs is to pick the locks

they got the shit scared out of them from the game master's voice in the walkie talkie telling them to solve it properly bc dude... don't do that??/

ortho detects hidden walls and rooms before the game even starts but he doesnt speak of them

he'll always be hovering around them though and stares directly into the security cameras

sebek is so stressed bc this space is so small and so hot. AND HES GONNA BE STUCK HERE FOR AN HOUR

jack is infected by the stress radiating off sebek for the same reasons but also bc he can hear jamil and riddle going awfff on their group in the other room and it is really freaking distracting

ortho picks up the most useless, disconnected keyboard and started carrying it around for funsies (its like so outdated and he wants to show it to idia to laugh at it) before the walkie-talkie kindly asked them to put it back because it's not a clue

epels mind is in the right place, trying to find patterns in the titles of the bookshelf, but they're really just there for decoration

grim's floor sniffing habit comes in so handy rn bc he's finding things under beds and in drawers

there is a piano in their room and aside from grim stomping on the keys, epel played hot cross buns, thinking he was the only one who knew how to play, then yuu, our champion, comes in playing some classical backing music

it shocked sebek so much that yuu was practically a music god, then asked them to play some mozart, and again, got the piss scared out of them

a loud thunk and bam, accidentally unlocked another hidden room

ace and deuce were in a competition of who could find the hints the fastest and tragically they were the two that didn't find any hints at all

in short, it was sheer dumb luck that got them out

8/10, if only it wasn't for sebek breaking down near the end of the hour because he got his hand stuck in a box and started panicking

because they were the first to finish, they were allowed to look at how the second and third years were doing and damn, they had such a big laugh about it

aka it turned into a dorm thing

second years

there are many brilliant minds in this group which would make them a very good contender for getting out

unfortunately they are smart individually but extremely dumb when together

they started handcuffed to each other and surprisingly no one really minds it

like, it's not maaaajorly distracting like they can get things done without too much struggle

and silver insists that its good to have a buddy system in case they get lost, you know, inside a very unspacious room

only downside is that sometime there will be some squabbles about someone yanking too hard but overall they're very peaceful

ruggie will be carrying all the random objects they manage to uncover in case they're needed (aka azul keeps passing over random objects for ruggie to hold— he thinks that they are clues)

mostly because kalim was supposed to, but he left them all over the place and forgot about them while trying to solve puzzles

jade, his handcuff buddy, is seeing all this happen but does he grab the misplaced items? no lmao

instead kalim's the button pusher bc he wants to be useful but sometimes he presses the wrong buttons because its so dARK, WHY IS IT SO DARK???

jamil gets so pissy that u practically couldn't see shit, so he climbed on floyd's shoulders to go fix the fucking lights

floyd complained a lot because jamil's constant reaching felt like he was personally trying to tear his arm off by the socket

silver gets so into the scenario that the escape room assigned so he's on Full Survival Mode

constantly gets on the floor to look for clues underneath things too

everyone should pray that there aren't live actors jumping out or anything because he hears Person In Distress and it's actually on sight because he has a duty to protecc

riddle is hella mad about being constantly dragged onto the floor because OW???

azul and ruggie are constantly ransacking the room for items that may be useful

what was that? useful to the puzzle? absolutely not. they're looking for things that are useful to themselves; being useful to escaping is only a bonus

the severed prop arm ruggie found was probably of no use but he's carrying it anyway just because he can

riddle and azul are the (self-proclaimed) 'designated' logic problem solvers but they overthink it way too much

its actually jade and ruggie that do most of the problem solving bc they actually know how to work in group settings

but don't be fooled, jamil finds out first, but he never explicitly states it. he just nudges people in the right direction

being trapped in a room with the most insufferable people he's met? no thank you. he wants to gtfo as fast as he can w the least attention to himself

kalim and floyd just press and touch everything and somehow end up solving a puzzle together

silver ends up solving the puzzles pertaining to colour or order

riddle makes the most comments about how none of these things are historically accurate, but also ends up being the least helpful sjdhghjk

he keeps getting hooked on the wrong detail and that derails things

azul takes a dig at how riddle is focusing too much on a useless thing but ends up being equally derailed by the wrong detail

if given flashlights, kalim keeps fidgeting with it and is happy to be everyone's lamp

they could be in the middle of solving a puzzle and at the same time, someone will be revealing a childhood story and they all end up bonding

until someone decides its time for a Jokey-Joke and end up revealing some craaaazy trauma story and the whole group goes quiet for a little bit

(aka kalim did this unknowingly)

after getting out, the staff informed the group that they couldve freed themselves from the handcuffs by following the first clue

(they started from the second one because azul unknowingly swiped the first clue for ruggie go hoard ajdkkvkf)

also the staff thanked jamil for fixing the lights and a few mechanisms and gave the entire group a discount ojhfkkdlf

so sorry jamil, even more attention has been drawn to u

6/10 teamwork makes the dream work but they're only good at being friends not teams

third years

everyone and their mother knows this group does not make it out (alive)

when they're ushered into the room and told the premise, lilia, cater, and leona are already laughing and making fun of the scenario

as soon as the group is told to open their eyes, rook, malleus, and vil start commenting on the decor and atmosphere

idia just wants to win but he and trey both agree that their current group is doomed

(also no one knows what the scenario is bc they kept talking over it)

trying to get the keycard out of some locked box was their first puzzle

malleus is three seconds away to tearing the door off his hinges when rook gleefully proclaims he's found the key in one of the prop toilets

when everyone starts looking for clues, there's constant insults being flown around of how 'the drawer is out of bounds, stop trying to open it' or 'stop looking there, we're supposed to solve this puzzle first'

and yes they use their only clues on the first freaking puzzle bc no one knows what the hell is going on and then in later puzzles they keep blaming and arguing that SOMEONE used up all their clues on the first freaking puzzle

any sort of corpse or decaying statue will have at least two people pointing at it and claiming 'its you'

in fact, cater starts carrying the supposed possessed doll because it kinda looked like lilia

idia was laughing his ass off at this before mal got pissy at him & twisted off a mannequins hand and freaked out both idia and cater with a severed hand

rook ends up cuddling with the horror prop before lilia wanted a turn

at another point, he yanked off a bolted lock since it was getting in the way, and about half the group freaked out bc why??!? why did you do that?!?!

cater lap dances the statue, which then vil criticized by saying "put more back into it"

the weight shift caused the statue to light up

when finally being presented a clue that they had to crawl a tunnel to get to, everyone told lilia to get down, and ofc he just squatted and this LOUD crack came from his joints so trey felt bad enough to the point where he crawled in instead

then rook starting carrying the prop skeleton everywhere. it's his ventriloquist arc

the counter for the most 'IDIOT's being thrown around goes to this group

seven forbid there is an old computer that pertains to a puzzle because malleus would suggest to use magic to shock it into working every ten seconds

lilia and leona end up trying to guess the password while everyone else was looking for clues

idia would insult the computer like how is this fossil still up and running?

they were supposed to find the keyboard but idia Knows His Stuff and used the on-screen keyboard to push in the password

around half an hour in, malleus got bored and started speaking in his mother tongue

lilia started communicating in hisses and clicks, which the rest of them believed was a response to malleus (its not, but mal responded in the same fashion although no one, not even the speakers, knew what the other was saying)

in the other room, you will hear rook and cater singing a duet just to have something to do and every time a new song starts, a shoe will be thrown at the pair

i'd give them like a 2/10 because, honestly, they only solved like 2 puzzles, and that's only because of cater fooling around for one of them, and the other was because leona & idia were so freaking mad at being stuck in the first room that they solved it just to get a second room to themselves