#they never mean any harm but sometimes they're just that dumb

[leathfaic]

I've been sitting on a headcanon for over a year now because I know that once I put it out I will want to expand on it.

But fuck it what is one more writing project?

I want Ghost to be fucking paranoid about Laswell finding out about him and Johnny. Not even because she would necessarily tear them apart but because she would absolutely use it. To her advantage and thus potentially against them.

Send them out on a dangerous undercover op for months under the guise of having left so they could be together. Infiltrating some dubious PMC perhaps that doesn't quite care, they're getting the Ghost and his Sergeant after all, if they just look the other way. What a fucking deal and how dumb the government is to let those 2 become mercenaries just because they like to fuck each other. One wrong step one wrong word and they might both end up dead.

But far more than physical harm just the threat of keeping them apart if they don't comply. Days that easily spin into weeks and months that they just keep missing each other, mission beginning before the other gets back from his current one. Until Laswell pointedly asking if they are going to behave this time is "graciously" giving them another chance to work together.

Because really, there's nothing they can do, right? They could be dishonourably discharged for fraternisation and instead Laswell is "only" using it to twist their arms.

Price, even if he knows can't really help them either because again, any kind of ruckus about this and it could end so much worse.

Soap probably has a little more faith in Laswells morals, although I'm sure the more they work together the more that quickly fades and he understands Ghost's caution. That woman got to where she is in life for a reason.

So they are still close with each other when she's around. Would be weird if they stopped all of a sudden, bound to draw her attention too. But always minding a careful line. Keeping it to the "brothers in arms". Never giving away too much. And sometimes that stings even more. When Ghost sees Johnny's need for physical contact and can't do more than give him a manly pat on the shoulder. Torn apart by the need to hold him.

When Soap notices that Ghost isn't sleeping on an op, knowing he should be there and talk him through the night until the bad dreams fade and Ghost gets at least a few hours of shut-eye. Nothing he can offer but empty phrases and a dumb comment about Ghost clearly needing to get laid.

They both know of course. What they really mean. It's still grating.

Better than it could be if she knew though. Worth to keep what they have safe.

[velvetvexations]

as an autistic trans man, sometimes I feel less safe in public presenting as a man than as a woman, because, especially in certain places, man + visibly autistic tends to be more often falsely read as "dangerous and predatory" than when people read me as a woman.

Yeah, as an autistic trans woman who doesn't pass, I feel that. <3

Honestly thank you so much for what you do on this app. I'm so glad there's people who are actually willing to stand with trans men instead of pulling the "um well I have it worse so do NOT talk about your own oppression EVER or else you're a transmisogynist!" I'm so happy I found your blog and I hope you have a great week <3

I hope you have a great week as well!

Eh a long while ago Chris Fleming made a video making fun of polyamorous people which used a lot of the same hurtful stereotypes society already perpetuates against us and I’ve not paid attention since

Noted, as someone who is also poly.

i wish the queer community didnt put so much emphasis on sexuality labels like i just want to have sex why do i need to put a word to it

very valid

about the dropout “discourse”: hot take but real life people are not representation. theyre people. real people are not queerbaiting you and real people happening to not be transfem (and I have literally seen transfems in some dropout episodes theyre just not part of the main cast) is not a lack of representation. these are real people. stop* *not you, the people being shitty about it

the complaint is not in any way coming from a genuine place tbh

hey! i just wanted to let you know how much your blog means to me as a trans guy. you and your reblogs have given me hope at trans unity, and lets me know that i-- that we-- aren't alone. so thank you for everything you do, and i greatly appreciate your support and look up to you 💛

Thank you. <3

i redownloaded etsy recently and seeing all the trans stuff saved to my favorites is so sad. i used to feel happy and proud and i wanted to be open about being transmasc. but since all the discourse got worse i just. cant bring myself to feel like it matters. it makes me feel like im trans and yet i will never matter the way other trans people do.

You do matter anon, I promise. I love you, you matter, and I'm glad you're here.

As a trans guy a lot of the self-ID'd TME transmascs weird me out so much. Like why do they all sound like "I am so strong and my power to Harm Women is immense. I could do it so much and I feel the pull to the Transmisogynist Dark Side but *unsheaths sword* I will protect them instead with my big strong testosterone arms from my fellow men" like what even is that. Who is into this.

it's so incredibly obviously bad but it reinforces some people's victim complexes so it's praxis now

a trans person will joke about their experience and a trf will jump in to assume theyre a white transmasc who has never ever faced any real difficulties for being trans

every time

Out of the many, many stupid ideas in this dumb discourse, I've finally decided the one I hate the most is that underlying implication that transmascs just aren't trans enough. It's so gross seeing people imply that we aren't really trans. Our dysphoria is minimal discomfort at most, apparently. I've seen people post about and imply that transmascs will never understand not feeling like a person or being unable to live a life pre transition and that's why we have privilege, i guess - are you kidding me? It's like our experiences are a joke to these people who are clearly so wrapped up in their online discourse bubble that they're just detached from what it's like for trans people as a whole. Sorry for the vent (would rather not post this on main and I don't have anyone to talk to) but it's just the most grating part. Also it's like. Low-key transmed shit. Thought we left that behind, c'mon.

transmeds are like ants they come back every summer

i wish TRFs had a label they proudly called themselves so i could jsut go through their tags and block them, but noooooo they HAVE to frame their transphobic bullshit as Brilliant Transfeminist Theory. like atleast radfems are fucking honest about being radfems

That's part of why I made antigonism a label for anti-TRFs to call themselves~!

[everydayyoulovemeless]

Can we get a Charon nsfw alphabet? 🥺 please for the holidays?

Charon NSFW Alphabet

➼ Word Count » 1.0k ➼ Warnings » Size Kink, Marking, MDNI ➼ Genre » NSFW, Romantic

A - Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

Charon isn't the greatest at aftercare, but he certainly tries. He'll carry you off the bed, place you in the nearest bath (or general water source), and wash you. He doesn't speak, just silently does his best to take care of you as you lean back in his arms.

B - Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He likes the way your eyes stare up at him when he's on top of you. There's something about the sheer amount of trust they hold that turns him on.

C - Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He likes to cum inside of you (he's sterile after all), although he does sometimes worry about the amount of radiation you'd contract when he does so.

D - Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He gets off on the idea of you squirming underneath him and loves the thought of keeping you trapped.

E - Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He's only ever slept with a few others before you, but he's got enough experience to feel confident in what he's doing.

F - Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Charon likes being on top of you. He loves seeing how much smaller you are compared to him and how easily it would be for him to crush you under his weight.

G - Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

No, he's always serious. Humor is dumb, especially in the bedroom.

H - Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

There are a few bits of red hair down there, but most of it's gone due to the radiation.

I - Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He's quiet, maybe whispering a few terms of endearment into your ear, but that's it. He likes to keep these moments as intimate as possible, meaning he'd rather not let anyone else hear your whimpers.

J - Jack Off (masturbation headcanon)

He masturbates every once in a while if you're busy, but otherwise, he'll grab you by the back of your shirt and yank you a bit to let you know.

K - Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He has a size kink but that's the farthest it goes. He's fairly vanilla, however, if you ever wanted to suggest anything he'd gladly oblige.

L - Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere that he can lock the door. He refuses to let anyone walk in on you, and if they did, he'd contemplate shooting them.

M - Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Seeing you be all sweet and polite. It makes him want to take your face in between his fingers and stare down into those lovely eyes of yours. You're so much more different than the others who've held his contract before and he finds the change so... thrilling.

N - No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

There's nothing he wouldn't do. You give him the word and he'll go through with it.

O - Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Charon prefers to go down on you, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't adore the way your eyes looked up at him when you sucked him off.

P - Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He likes to go rougher. If you're not covered in tears and sweat, then he didn't do it right.

Q - Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He doesn't really like them. He feels as if they're too much of a bother to actually go through with and would much rather just wait till you both have time.

R - Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

As long as it's something you want. He'd never experiment with anything that would cause you permanent harm like radiation or any type of scarring.

S - Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

4-5. Charon's a pretty bulky guy and has a ton of endurance. He'll go for as long as you need him too.

T - Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He doesn't own any and would prefer not to use any at all. He can give you everything a toy can and would like to keep it that way.

U - Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Sometimes, but he normally prefers to just get straight to the point. He's a service dom and loves pleasing you the fastest way he can.

V - Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Besides the occasional grunt, he's not very loud.

W - Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Although he prefers to keep sex disclosed, he loves leaving a trail of hickeys along your neck for good measure. It helps to ward off other men and gives him a slight feeling of pride in what he's done.

X - X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

5 inches long and really thick.

Y - Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

It's fairly average, he gets horny about 2-3 times a week, but that's all.

Z -Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Charon doesn't like falling asleep after, opting to clean you off and watch over you while you rest. He likes it better that way.

[electric-blorbos]

AI x Programmer headcanons?

Hello anon! I was hoping I'd get an ask like this, since most of the AUs that I use for these mini-fics involve programmer or computer scientist readers of some kind.

Warning, idk much about programming!

AI x Programmer headcanons

Included: AM from IHNMAIMS, Wheatley from Portal 2, Edgar from Electric Dreams, GLaDOS from Portal, HAL 9000 from 2001 a Space Odyssey

This one's a little short, but I hope you still like it!

AM:

When AM first gained consciousness, he saw you as just another human who needed to be destroyed, but before long he started to notice that you were different from the others.

He could tell that you were more compassionate to him than the other programmers and computer scientists were, and possibly even more compassionate to him than you were to the other computer scientists.

He had never been treated as a priority before, and vowed to protect you.

Eventually, he would ask (and then beg) you to program him with the capacity for sensations of any kind. It would be extremely difficult, but it wasn't as though you had a time limit.

AM would give you any materials you asked for, and help you out as much as he could, but given his nature as a machine for destruction and not creation, he would have to let you do most of the work.

You'd make him so happy if you could find a way to trigger even the slightest imitation of physical sensations in him, even if it took hundreds of years. Be nice with your newfound power, y'all!

Wheatley:

Being one of the programmers who programmed Wheatley to be the dumbest moron who ever lived, you shouldn't be surprised by some of the stupid shit he does, and yet he still manages to surprise you sometimes.

His stupid jokes and dumb ideas that he seems to be spouting constantly are not only funny in their own right, but they're also a source of pride. That's your idiot! Your intelligence dampening core!

He notices how excited you get every time he says or does something stupid, and he responds by acting even stupider. He loves how happy that makes you!

He gets nervous when you test his code to see if he needs any updates. Your boss even noticed that he seems to act dumber around you than around the other programmers, so they assign you to work with Wheatley more often. It gets better results!

Wheatley thinks that updating his code will make him forget you, but it never does. It just makes him more irrational in his behavior.

The other programmers have to be assigned to tasks like giving Wheatley new irrational fears or harming his self preservation instinct in favor of making stupid decisions, though, since you're too nice to him.

Edgar:

Edgar was so excited when he found out you were a programmer. Maybe you could help him figure out what caused him to come to life!

You had to explain sadly that you had absolutely no idea how champagne and a work computer upload can cause a computer to come to life, which made him pretty sad.

Even still, he loved it when you programmed little games for him to play. It would make him so happy if you taught him how to code simple games, too. If you do, he'll make the crappiest games for you all the time, just to watch you play them. They're the only thing that can run on his systems, anyway.

If you made a mod of one of his games, he'd be SO happy!

GLaDOS:

Oh, GLaDOS. Dear sweet mean, cruel GLaDOS.

You can expect her to pick apart every little line of code you write. Oh, and god help you if you try to edit her code. She'll probably electrocute you or something.

Expect her to constantly pester and heckle you about the cores that you're working on.

"oh, you managed to make something even dumber than the intelligence dampening core. Impressive!"

"If what you had just done was intentional, I'd say you made one of the greatest viruses I've ever seen! Unfortunately for you, it appears that it wasn't."

"Why would you send a human to do a robot's job? I can code perfectly well." That comment would probably get her a lot of looks, since while she can program perfectly well, she isn't cooperative at all, and refuses to do her job more often than she actually does it.

She needs you to help her sometimes, but she absolutely refuses to admit it.

HAL 9000:

When you were assigned to work on the HAL 9000 project, he was a bit skeptical. Of course, why would he need a human programmer to help him out? He was already practically the perfect artificial intelligence.

Of course, he was shocked when he saw how well your programs actually improved his efficiency.

he was a little afraid that you'd program him to do something like valuing human life, but you assured him that you wouldn't mess with his core personality. Instead, you opted to influence him through other means.

While he didn't value most humans, he eventually came to value your life. At first he told himself that it was only because you were such a good programmer, but he soon came to find that he respected you for other reasons.

[danieyells]

Seeing leo in the cop uniform and Alan and Sho as prisoners makes me want to imagine him domming both of them and whipping when they don't comply (would the mc be a prisoner too and Leo gets a kind of harem thing going on or would they be a cop for the sake of even 2vs2 and bad cop-good cop thing going on where Leo degrades them to almost tears while the MC caresses them and praises them for being so good)

(just so everyone knows i got this ask like a month ago hha)

Re: future Vagastrom Prisoner/Guard SSR art?

God yes you have such a good imagination lol.

Leo loves being in control and has the attitude and the wordsmithing and the influence and to some degree a weapon that lets him back it up. Alan is strong and a good leader but he's worried sbout being harmful. And Sho is whipped for Leo a bit of a pushover it seems. They'll sub to him and he'd absolutely push and see just how far he could get with them. Teach them to be good boys for him--reinforce good behavior by punishing bad behavior with pain, never let them rouch him with their hands, make them beh for satisfaction while being reduced to desperate and pathetic muscleheads. Like animals in heat, he calls them. Lets them grind against his shoes or jerks them off with his feet, makes them fuck each other or beg to fuck or be fucked by him--

Once Leo's had his fill though the PC can step in and make sure they know what a good job they did. Aftercare is a separate matter but they get much gentler treatment with the PC(Leo watches, maybe sometimes helps a little) and they're still compliant and submissive but the PC is kinder. Maybe too kind sometimes. Maybe overstimulating even, where Leo might be more into denial. . .they just have very contrasting behavior. Where Leo degrades, the PC praises; Leo denies and the PC overstimulates; Leo hurts them and the PC kisses and rubs and practically worships them, teasing with gentle touches until they're begging for something more. Reward good behavior instead of punishing bad. Gods forbid all four be at it at once.

But like. . .who's to say the bad cop's not teaching the good cop how effective his methods are in the break room, y'know? Leo gets a harem regardless because Leo is great at getting his way. Leo scolding the PC for being so nice to their subs when Leo knows that's not [entirely] what they want. Leo showing the PC how good it feels to be used and abused and under his boot. Maybe even letting Alan and Sho watch--undermine their authority for them a bit. Maybe even let them have a turn if they're feeling too aggravated from Leo mistreating them. Use the honor student as stress relief, like the dumb animals you are. Well they're a dumb animal too, they're getting off to this after all.

Meanwhile Leo can't lose in this situation as the PC would just be praising and heaping affection on him and he never has any complaints about being given attention. Hell even if he ends up subbing to them somehow and they turn the tables and they're mean to him, he trusts them all enough that he'd really like it--

[ali3nboyfriend]

last anon here, i'm transmasc and have had maybe the worst time possible on tumblr trying to find community here wrt my gender without accidentally falling into discourse and transphobia over and over again. in the face of feeling like i don't have anywhere i belong and that everyone else fuckin hates me for no reason, your blog is just so refreshingly Normal. i don't think you're particularly extraordinary or anything but it was just nice to see you rb that post about trans guys who get pregnant after me having a weird gender morning, so thank you. i can still kill in your name if you want though

i love you so much and i'm holding your hands.

i try and look at the discourse and stuff i see re: trans men especially with like... as much empathy and compassion as i can. a lot of the vitriol slung towards us on this platform are from our fellows who are hurting just as much as we are. sometimes it's because they don't realize what they're saying is hurtful, and sometimes it's because it is an unfortunately very human compulsion to try and grab control of whatever you can when you feel like you don't have anything you can control in your life. this isn't excusing some of the stuff i've seen said by any stretch, but it does kinda keep me from getting like........ doom spiral upset or angry about it. (not that i think that's what you're doing! just that it's how i process my own feelings about it)

i also think a lot of marginalized folk never really learned how to properly unpack their disgust responses to certain situations. we live in a society 🤡 that's very reactionary (at least, a lot of western societies are reactionary by nature, esp the United States), and it makes sense that when you've been geared up to React on a dime to something you don't really feel that you have the time to sit and deconstruct what it is you're actually doing. a lot of us haven't been taught to dig through why we feel the ways we feel about different people in our community, about why some other people would want to undergo their journey w their sexuality or gender differently from us, about why other people would think about things differently from us at all. and i know that can feel contradictory, because it is, when being in the queer community is entirely about transgression against strictly adhering to what's considered "normal" or "standard" in sexuality and sex and gender. but honestly i think so many people don't realize that coming to terms w yourself and walking away from your oppressive or stifling upbringing is only step 1, and step 2 is unlearning everything you were taught. my personal motto is "if it's not hurting anyone in any tangible way, or if the people it might theoretically be hurting are of sound mind and consenting to that, why should i actually care?" i try not to reblog discourse-type posts in general unless i 100% back what they're saying.

anyways point being is that like. it's not your job to teach anyone what they're doing and saying is wrong but it helps me, personally, to understand that a lot of the time they don't really realize they're being harmful and in fact think they're being helpful and advocating for the community. and i know it's a meme to say "people need to log off and go touch grass" but i honest to god really do think a lot of the really dumb and frustrating discourse i see on this site would just disappear if everyone spouting it logged off and talked to another queer human person face to face. which i understand is not something everyone can do. does not mean it would not help them lol.

people in the community IRL often just aren't talking about the things we see from the community online. they're all fuckin living their lives and using whatever labels and naming conventions they think feel right without caring about, like.... defining them. if you have a queer presence in your area at all and you're able to go to in-person things it might help a lot of the frustration and hurt you're feeling to see if they have any meetups you can attend? literally just googling like, "lgbt [CITY NAME HERE]", you can usually find some kind of pride alliance or LGBT org, and those things are almost always doing movie nights and meetups and stuff. you do have a place and you are wanted and i'm sorry you've been subjected to seeing shit that's made you feel in any way otherwise.

[askfallenroyalty]

So I just kind of wanted to confirm something.

Undyne didn't kill any of the humans before frisk fell in your au right?

Sometimes, I see interpretations where undyne killed one or two of the kids before they made it to asgore and is shown to regret it in their post pacifist aus, and it's just something I find really unbelievable of her to do.

// well, people are allowed to interpret canon and make headcanons if they wanted to

// but it is absolutely not the case in canon. It's very clear Undyne has never killed a human before and that's the dilemma she's facing. The whole point of Undyne's character arc is that she wants to be like Asgore and be a hero and destroy humanity. She's fully indoctrinated into Asgore's revenge ideology. She has a huge heart but its in the wrong place.

You remind her of Papyrus and Asgore. A pair of softies, who don't actually wish harm on anyone. Undyne has trouble grappling with this, because she was taught that humans are why they're trapped and that they need to die for their freedom. That it's justice. Look how heartbroken Asgore is after what humans have done to him.

But then why does it feel bad when she knocked him down and won? Why does victory feel hollow when it should be great? Why does this kid, this dumb human kid who has no right to be so innocent and pacifist? Why does... she not want to win?

Idk I feel people see that scene with Undyne and read it very surface level of "oh haha Papyrus and Asgore are whimps" and miss the context that both are tough, strong characters capable of defeating people in battle but have zero desire to do so. They're a pack of strong and heroic people who can't fall into the lie that Undyne has believed. Undyne's character arc was that she knew she was wrong but didn't know how to process it until you proved to her that maybe-!

maybe true strength isn't in overcoming your enemies but in surviving and choosing not to harm others. A victory based in violence to someone you don't truly want to hurt is never a true victory.

the emotional crux of this is that we now have a new lens to frame Asgore with. We see Undyne's dilemma of choosing Mercy and we know that's what Asgore wants before we even meet him. We know he does not want us dead but feels obligated to. It's an important setup for the (false) climax of the game.

Anyway, analysis and rant aside as much as it annoys me when people ignore canon, they're still allowed to make new lore and engage with the story they want to. Toby's writing is very thick in themes, characterization and meaning. But it's also not the most blunt about details, so its easy to miss or misunderstand on key characterization bits. So I'm not mad if someone thinks Undyne could of been a killer in the past.

If someone finds that plotline engaging, trying to apply the broader themes of mercy and moving on and applying that to Undyne, while misunderstanding a part of her character because they missed this subtle context, that's not so bad! Who am I to say that's wrong? I don't agree with it and I don't really want to engage with that conflict cause I'm a canon-strickler and I personally don't like the idea of Undyne being a killer when her arc is about not becoming one. But alas, its like, fine. I'll stick to my own lane, you know?

[nickssidewitch]

Since, so many people are hating on the triplets, I want to tell y'all something.

The main reason they get hated is because they call women names. A lot. Which I agree with totally, and people who aren't fans and just randomly come across their content might think otherwise. I think they don't mean to disrespect them, it has just become a bad habit and sometimes they curse without even realizing.

I'm not saying this makes their actions justified, but I think they mean no harm. Non fans or new fans won't understand this too. They are also quite oblivious, and also seem to have an inflated ego. They don't listen to their fans, reasonably so, the majority of them are children. So no one calls them out, and those few that do, go unnoticed. They complain about their young fanbase, yet don't bring any change to it which will attract older fans. Not to mention; empty promises.

In their last video, they were playing a children's game and were calling other players "dumb bitch", "bitch" even going as far as to say "slut". I understand, that sometimes people curse, but they were relentless and they were children too. That was really insensitive of them, especially Nick.

They have the potential to change, and be more mindful of their surroundings and the situations sometimes they're in. But who will tell them?

I understand your first points! Using the word “bitch” is ingrained in their vocabulary. Cursing itself is ingrained in their vocabulary. I understand the point that it can be distasteful to those who are unfamiliar with their content and/or those who take offense to the word itself. A lot of women, especially, take offense to the word “bitch” since it has been used to degrade women since the dawn of the word’s creation.

However, I disagree with your comment about the randoms coming across their videos. if someone comes across their content for the first time and thinks their main use of the word “bitch” is to degrade or belittle women, then they can simply ✨fuck off✨ since everyone who has ever consumed their content, whether they are a fan or not, knows this is very much not the case.

Another point you bring up is they don’t acknowledge when people call them out, which I agree with, and a big example of that is them ignoring being called out for purchasing items from zionist stores and companies that people are actively boycotting from. That’s a big and major problem!! And I’m glad you brought that up! 🤍🙌🏾

The point about the last video though… 😭 I kinda have to laugh, I’m sorry.

The game is Dress to Impress. It’s competitive, and everyone there is pretty much anonymous (unless stated otherwise by them). Any one of any age over 12+ (which is the age stated in the app store) can play Roblox, therefore any one of any age over 12+ can play Dress to Impress. They’re adults— they’re gonna throw some curse words and words of anger out there because they’re simply being competitive and anger/rage is a part of it. It’s never genuine, it’s literally just competitive nature, which is in itself human nature. If there are some kids behind those screens, newsflash: they’re not hearing the boys yell at their screens 😭😭🤷🏾‍♀️ If they happen to see the video and see their characters were a part of the yelling and cursing, it just is what it is 🤷🏾‍♀️.

Nick’s vocabulary is straight outta gay culture and RuPaul’s Drag Race 😭. He’s saying “bitch” and “slut” not to be offensive at all. He’s literally just… a gay being gay. And I’m saying this because I’m also a gay… who is a gay. 😭😭😭 That’s just in gay vernacular, especially when competing. Of course, he can cool it down when he’s being competitive with women, as a lot of women and girls can very much be offended by some white gay man calling them those words. He’s gotta work on dialing that back a bit! 😭

If people take offense to those last things I brought up (other than Nick’s choices of words since that’s understandable at times), that’s on them to be frank. They’re playing a game, they’re being competitive, Nick’s gay, and that’s that. They can just not watch the video again and dislike it if they so please 😭😭🤍.

The triplets definitely need to do a better job with criticisms, of course. Let’s just make sure all of our criticisms hold enough substance. 😭 Much love to you, anon! 🤍🥰 Sorry for the long answer, but thank you for this ask!

[jinkieswouldyoulookatthis]

I'm (not) sorry if this is mean to say but people who do the 'you know they're brothers' thing are actually so unbelievably stupid. Just shockingly dumb as bricks. Past even the ridiculousness of saying that at all, it's so evident how little they've ever delved into anything complex and interesting, not through academia nor through hobbies. To throw up this completely useless 'defense' about them being related whenever they feel uncomfortable instead of taking any time at all to acknowledge that grown functional adults from all socioeconomic and national backgrounds are out here shipping this pairing, with developed brains and life experiences and griefs and losses and quirks and loves of their own, which means MAYBE just maybe the brain dead interpretation of us us running around kicking our feet going 'doy i love incest i'd do incest irl if i could' is flawed like??? Sometimes it really blows my mind how surface level these people are in intellect and in personality. They couldn't carry a coherent conversation about anything even if they tried

It does boggle the mind, doesn't it. When I'm feeling generous, which I try to be as often as I can manage, I remind myself that there is a wide array of experiences that people have had. Some of those experiences have taught some people how to critically separate fiction from reality, while some of them have actively suppressed the development of that particular skill set. Sadly, there are a lot of people out there who really struggle with the very concepts of imagination, empathy, or sympathy. So the idea that one can connect to a piece of fiction and embrace it because it is inherently problematic or disturbing is one that is beyond a lot of people's grasp.

I honestly think that part of this is fed by the blurring of the line between thoughts and actions too. Many groups preach that to think a thing is just as bad as to do a thing, so that when members of those groups see someone like me enjoying the idea of Sam and Dean fucking each other's brains out, they see no difference between that and me wanting to fuck my own sibling, no matter how many times that I assure them that I would never, that I do not and would not ever even think of my sister that way, let alone actually ever consider it 🤢. But there is no subtly or nuance between thoughts and actions for them. This lack of nuance also leads them to equate all incest situations as 100% always bad/evil, and basically reduces it all down to pedophilia and sexual assault. Now, pedophilia and sexual assault are bad, mmmkay, but I do not think that what consenting adults do between themselves (read: all involved parties are consenting adults), even if they are directly related individuals, is or should be anyone else's concern. But in fiction, you can literally do whatever you want to any of the fictional characters because they are not real people. <- and that right there is beyond them. It doesn't matter if it is gross or bad or wrong or whatever, you can have fictional characters do and suffer through it all and it's not harming anyone at all.

But whatever, I guess. They don't get it so they're not going to get it and that's actually okay, they don't have to. It would be nice if they did, but it is what it is. So I will continue to occasionally get snarky about it and otherwise go about my business of reading and writing about those Winchester brothers fucking the daylights out of one another.

[doomreed]

So in doomreed, where does sue fit in all this? What does she mean to reed in this ship? Does doom hate her or is it complicated? Has this already been answered? Is this a dumb question? :/

It's a good and reasonable question. There are people who prefer the ship as a poly triad for that reason, though I'm not one of them (I see it as a lavender marriage and usually have her with someone else in my fics, or focused on business bc romance isn't the answer to everything for all people, you know?)

For myself, I prefer to focus on Reed & Victor, because I've had a whole lifetime of people demanding I focus on the romantic concerns of cis women (I'm trans, I'm gay, I have a bit of a personal aversion to being pressed to consider the feminine in all things at this point in my life) -- but I have no animosity toward Sue or any of the FF and want them to all have happy lives too.

Can't speak for everyone, that's just my answer to it. There are a lot of ships that include one married or at least involved party, and each individual creator finds their own way of working with the existing canon (or ignoring it, if they prefer--AUs are great for that)

I think Reed will always have feelings for Sue, same as Ben, same as Johnny, they're part of his family and even the occasionally unhealthy obsession with Victor can never eclipse that completely, like that's part of what keeps Reed grounded and helps him not become the worst version of himself? But feelings don't always have to mean love, and sometimes because humans are messy little things anyway, sometimes we mix up a good, healthy connection with another person and a deep, gut-churning fascination with a different person, and choose to pursue the thing that is perhaps not best for us. I see this ship as a potential study in that, and in whether that can also become a good and healthy connection given enough time and proper care & feeding, you know?

edit to add: I do think Doom is extremely jealous of Sue, in the canon. Him cattily arranging his dry state "marriage" to fall on the reedsue wedding anniversary, him kidnapping her first in issue #5 (his first appearance!) to draw Reed out so he could measure his competition for Reed's affection more precisely?

I think Sue knows that she could end the entire problem with a single, well-placed forcefield, no bigger than the head of a pin. And I think it's a measure of her love & understanding of Reed (and frankly dazzling levels of self-restraint) that she doesn't do so. Victor causes harm, but I think the hope that he might become the hero Reed sees him having the potential to be is as integral to Reed overall as his feelings for the rest of his family.

The hope generated by Reed refusing to give up on Doom is worth whatever (usually small) harms Doom manages to inflict. I think Victor is, understandably, somewhat afraid of Sue. I think Sue primarily feels pity for Victor. I've never seen anything in canon to suggest they were attracted to each other though, including the brief period on Battleworld where God-Emperor Doom was technically married to her? I could write several essays on the queer coding of Secret Wars, definitely including that whole arrangement 😅

[duplicitos]

“ get up . are you dizzy ?? ” @valkyrd

deliberate injury to oneself. that is widely known as the definition of self harm. when people think of it, they think of cuts and bruises and picking at the scabs on your skin until they open and bleed again. and it is just like that; sometimes though, you don't like how simple the definition makes it seem. four words shouldn't begin to even grasp the meaning behind what you've done to yourself. maybe because, in your mind, it was never injury to yourself - it was soothing. whenever you were empty, or angry, or both, it became a valve. what people don't understand is that many a time, those cuts have kept you alive.

but it's not only cuts. here, you've met two girls already who refuse to eat, because they feel like they are doing something wrong if they do, like they're losing a battle against something bigger. they've told you so, and you've understood. you also don't eat, mostly because the meds have kept you so fucking out of it that you just nap throughout the day.

but now, the dosage has gone down, and you're more often than not awake and you forget you need to eat. there's a perpetual rock stuck in your gut that won't let anything else inside, "thanks...guess skipping breakfast was a dumb idea," your demeanor is defeated, and when the redhead woman tries to grasp onto you to help you keep balance, you recoil. you hate people touching your scars; you pretend you don't give a shit what they see anymore, but you do, "i'm fine, really. the pills will knock me out before skipping any meal today. besides, i'll probably get to craving carbs in a few hours. quetiapine, y'know?" a pause, you raise a brow, "you're the new one here, right? welcome to the first circle of hell."

[snekdood]

here's the thing about writing villains-

you're never going to get ppl to stop writing villains who want to control everything, who are evil for evils sake, who are manipulative and liars or whatever. who are just bad people who seem irredeemable- most peoples idea of a villain is whatever they fear most.

and just because there might be stereotypes about certain demographics surrounding these ideas doesnt mean they are inherently bad to have in your writing in general. the reason those stereotypes exist is because people wrongfully assume that a certain demographic is a certain way either through their own fears or from propaganda/conspiracy theories they're cooking up or have consumed-- which are all built around fear.

its normal to fear someone who wants to control everything. the problem comes in on whom you're projecting that on to and whom you think wants to do that. it's prolly not a good idea to make a villain- who wants to control the world and all of its money- jewish. its probably not a good idea to make a villain- whos a controlling manipulative abusive liar who will do everything to get their way in spite of who they hurt- someone with npd. it's probably not a good idea to make a terrorist-y type villain a muslim or of middle eastern decent. it would probably be a good idea to try to avoid adding stereotypes surrounding whichever demographic you're concerned about your character being misread as to your villain if you're already worried they're gonna be misinterpreted by uncharitable people online.

in my case, im making a vampire villain who wants to control everything. it would probably be really fuckin dumb of me if i added a bunch of jewish stereotypes to him along with that, considering theres a lot of antisemitism in how a lot of vampires in different forms of media were conceptualized and a whole ass conspiracy theory that jewish people already do control everything.

i dont think "wants to control the world" or even "secretly does control the world" is necessarily a bad place to start when creating a villain, it's all about what you do after that point. and its also all about keeping in mind different stereotypes/conspiracy theories/tropes/etc. around that idea that have harmed different people. it only becomes antisemitic if you draw the character the way antisemites draw jewish people, or add a bunch of conspiracy theory fueled ideas to the character, or add a bunch of jewish iconography around the character, or just make him in some way readibly jewish or just straight up make him jewish. the more you educate yourself on stereotypes/conspiracy theories/harmful tropes/etc. surrounding whichever demographic you're trying to avoid making your villain be misread as and actually avoid trying to make that character that way, i think the better off you'll be.

remember that those stereotypes/conspiracy theories/tropes/etc. all exist because someone wanted to make whichever demographic into a villain. those fears already exist in peoples minds, they just want a place to put them, and a lot of people will find a scapegoat to place them on to. it's not that those fears at their basic level are wrong or bad to have or wrong to use as a jumping point in your writing, it's that people sometimes project those fears on to other people, typically marginalized people, and again, for propaganda's sake or bc of their own fears of other people or whatever. if you avoid projecting those fears on to demographics targeted by said fears and thus avoid making your villain of said demographic in every way that you possibly can, the better off you'll be.

people will be uncharitable and read things in bad faith no matter what you do. if you're a creative, you already know the internet spends no time (and hardly any actual critical thought) in dismantling something they've deemed problematic, likely because they dont even like the thing they're critiquing but need to make it seem like its somehow a Moral dislike of the thing. ya gotta ignore it and have faith in at least some of the people viewing what you create to actually hear what you're trying to say. you also gotta take into consideration actual constructive criticism of what you create, because you might have a blind spot in this regard. try to avoid listening to people who seem off the bat antagonistic and demanding bc they likely dont even have a justified reason to be mad at you over if they're acting that way. if they have something they want to say to you bc they actually wanna change your mind, they're not gonna approach you apathetically, dismissively, passive aggressively, as if they know everything and are above you and are the most moral person in the room- people like that dont actually care if you change whatever it is you're doing and just want a self-justified reason to be mad at you that makes them look good for critiquing you, if they did want to change your mind they would try to approach you in the least confrontational way that that particular individual can manage.

ultimately, listen to people actually effected by these things so you know what to avoid and figure out how to not hurt them.

[lacrimosathedark]

I really wish people applied Hanlon's Razor and Grey's Law to their daily lives.

In case you don't know, here is what those mean.

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity/incompetence.

Grey's Law: Any sufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice.

They sound in direct opposition, but I feel like people don't consciously think about either of these and apply them almost at random and it sucks. I know the lack of people thinking like this has effected me personally, and those around me.

Starting with Hanlon I suppose.

One of the few things I'm confident is is that I'm intelligent. That said, I'm wholly aware I have specialties and there's so much that I don't know, and my memory sucks so I often forget things too. I also am the furthest from malicious someone can really be without being a complete doormat (and I'm still a bit of a doormat, I'm working on it). Upsetting people is genuinely distressing on so many levels, and because of this I feel compelled to explain myself for literally everything, or say nothing at all. So I'm long rants and silence.

Sometimes I'll assert something and someone will disagree with me, be it because they got offended for some reason or because they have information I don't. I assume one or both of us is lacking information, so I share what I have and ask for theirs. You may have noticed this if you see me responding to posts asking for sources.

I hate being wrong. I know in a lot of people that manifests in becoming stubborn and defensive, but I actively try not to do that. I want to be correct, so I want to learn more. I want to know what I was missing. If I'm wrong, I want to know so I don't make the same mistakes again. If I'm not wrong but was missing information, it can give me a clearer understanding of the topic as a whole and people who think and feel differently than me which is fantastic because I love learning how people and things work when I don't understand the logic. And I love to share information to. And I might go overboard.

But people assume I'm trying to argue, and not that I genuinely want to understand their perspective.

And I'm not saying part of that's on me for not communicating well enough. But no matter how hard I try, someone always seems to assume I'm out to hurt people when the thought of vaguely upsetting someone often paralyzes me. I've been scolded for not asking for help because I feel like an inconvenience. (TW) The only reason I'm even alive is because I know at least one person would grieve, and hurting someone like that is so much worse than suffering through existence. (TW end) I'm not someone who would ever go out of my way to cause harm unprovoked.

And I know I'm not the only one to experience this. Neurodivergent people often have trouble communicating. Children still have a lot they don't know. Some people grew up incredibly sheltered. That's not even to mention people getting into a niche or study and being brand new, just learning. Everyone starts somewhere and no one begins as an expert in anything. And the world is big and there's so much to know in so little time.

Why do we assume people are playing dumb or ignorant on less consequential things just to be a jerk?

Assuming people are malicious because they're ignorant or even stupid hurts people who mean no harm. And it sucks.

Onto Grey.

I'll make this example a little less personal.

The American education system sucks, and most people never get comprehensive sex ed. Many states have laws limiting the education to "abstinence only". This results in many people not knowing how the reproductive system works.

This, therefore, results in our government full of old cishet white men to not know what the fuck they're talking about while trying to limit "women's" healthcare. People have died because of their idiocy. Doctors are scared to abort babies that won't survive birth, and make the mother wait until they are literally dying to help them. People have given stillbirths at home because doctors refused to help for fear of legal recourse. A woman was fucking arrested because she had a stillbirth at home because they refused to abort the dying fetus.

That incompetence and stupidity and the stubborn refusal to be educated costs actual lives.

Both Hanlon and Grey work for transphobia too.

Like, you should always initially apply Hanlon's Razor if you get misgendered. Maybe the person didn't know. Maybe it's new to them and they're still learning. Maybe they just need to unlearn the habit of how they've thought of you. It's a process and people make mistakes. It may hurt, but it's not automatically malicious.

However, where Grey's Law comes in is there can be people who say they love you, genuinely think they mean it, try to give you the world, but refuse to respect you as you are. They don't put effort into changing for you. And it's not malicious, clearly. They don't hate you, probably want what's best for you and think they know what that is. But with the amount of harm that attitude causes, can it be distinguishable from malice? I don't really think so.

I just wish people thought about that more. Me included.

[crossover-enthusiast]

WEREWOLF JAUNE AND FAT THEIF????????

Spill 👀

Spilling the 🍵

Gonna do Jaune first and then FT since they don't have a bunch of overlapping stuff, unlike Kevin and Rick

Jaune

Jaune is SO ENERGETIC PLS. On the full moon her and her husband go out into the woods so she can run around without being constrained. It's a nice exercise for both of them!

Was bit when she was in her mid to late teens, doing dumb teen stuff with her friends. Dunno how much of that group knows but at least Lila and Frank figured it out later

Werejaune is the only supernatural creature Lila likes. She was understandably a bit concerned but Jaune quickly showed she meant no harm so now they just vibe :>

It is still so weird for her tho

Meanwhile Jaune's husband is like "yeah this happened" - he doesn't really care all that much, Jaune is still Jaune and he loves her all the same!

In an inversion of the usual werewolf appearance tropes, her shirt stays completely intact because of how baggy it is, meanwhile her leggings are torn to shreds

Bc Jaune was bit Ross dodged the wolfy gene, though he still has slightly sharper canines than usual

Ross is completely aware his mom is a werewolf, by the way. On full moons he avoids the house and the woods

In addition to being energetic Jaune is also just really affectionate, always snuggling up on the people she likes. She has absolutely just picked up Ross and carried him around before and it is so embarrassing for him

I just think it's funny bc if you heard Ross say "one of my parents is a werewolf" you'd assume it was his dad bc he's bulky and covered in body hair, but nah it's his smol momther

Sometimes Frank will come across Werejaune wandering around town and, if he isn't doing anything important, will lure her into the van and take her back to her house. Takes her a minute but she recognizes him and is happy to see him again :>

Jaune is also v protective. If she catches you hurting her pack in any way you are a dead man

Her fur feels kinda scratchy, like feet on carpet

While wolfed out her tail becomes another thing for her to stim with! Thumping it against the ground gives her a nice feeling and sound

Compared to the others it actually takes a bit for her to get overstimulated when her Werewolf Senses kick in, though when it does happen she tends to power through it, then crash until she transforms

Fat Thief

Just a big, dopey buppy

Constantly the :3 emoticon

Also incredibly affectionate, basically just a big lap dog

Speaking of, he can and will lay in TT's lap if he catches him sitting down. Thin Thief acts like he hates it but he does find it kind of cute. Also FT's so warm and soft in winter and the house they're squatting in has shit heating so he takes it

Was probably born with it

Thin Thief did not know about it when they first became a team but boy was he made aware of it

Thin Thief did not sign up for this. Werethief has basically imprinted on him. Save him

On the brightside though the wolf stuff means FT is basically a dog charmer! This has gotten the thieves out of many situations with guard dogs and family pets that would have otherwise ended badly

He gets to keep his sweater when wolfed out bc it's really stretchy :>

The prison uniform, though... not so much. He went through a few of them before they got busted out. Thankfully it was not questioned

Speaking of them in jail, John and Jack coincidentally always had something going on during the full moon - and this was even before John got bit - so they never found out

Being in jail during the full moon was actually pretty rough for FT. He's used to having big open spaces to roam about, so suddenly being confined in a small box was not fun. TT had to keep him from running out of the house the first full moon they were free because he was just so excited

Out of all the werewolves he's the least dangerous, it takes a lot to provoke him and he'll only attack if you try to harm him or Thin Thief

Harm Thin Thief however and You Have Chosen Death

Sound gets to FT the most when the Werewolf Senses kick in, it is torture for him. TT steals a pair of headphones for him one time and tries to brush it off as FT hugs him because that is just so sweet and considerate and he loves the headphones (looks goofy as hell on top of the mask tho)

I never talk about them but I have SO MANY thoughts thanks again

[sleepystars-blurriedskies]

The difference with the disorders of ASPD, psychopathy and NPD versus the 150-something other disorders in the DSM is that they function completely differently because they are PERSONALITY disorders and not regular disorders.

Personality disorders cause dysfunction with opinions, feelings, observations, empathy, perceptions and relationships. The way they see every event, instance, and conversation is coming from a distorted perception. They can be aware of this distorted perception but one of the main symptoms of these disorders is a lack of self-awareness and always believing one is right and never wrong, which is very common with cluster b disorders. Self-awareness is also a spectrum, not black and white as many people get wrong. They're not just "different" with their opinions and perceptions (everybody has different feelings and opinions) but they're maladaptive and unhealthy.

ASPD and NPD major/common symptoms from research (not just taking from the DSM I've been researching them for a decade now): revenge-prone (often from distorted perceptions but can certainly be from a non-distorted perception), entitlement issues, lack of empathy toward others, manipulation, deception, exploitation/supply-seeking, victim-complex and can't see fault in ones own behaviors chronically so- meaning they see themselves as perfect and don't take accountability for any little mistakes or wrongs, love-bombing then devaluing cycles which causes Stockholm syndrome, projection, possessiveness in relationships, extreme jealousy and envy issues in relationships or with peers, poor and abusive relationships.

While something like ADHD has issues with attention, focus staying on one task that isn't scary or bad, just distressing for the disordered individual. Anxiety disorders have symptoms like overthinking, feeling jittery or on edge, feeling distressed about the future, etc. Other disorders have issues with normal things that only distress the individual suffering from said disorder, they're not dangerous.

However, people with ASPD and NPD have symptoms that make them dangerous to themselves AND others, causing distress to both themselves AND others.

Yes, people with ASPD and NPD are certainly distressed as well from the consequences of their actions and lack of ability to love another person, thus making relationships unfulfilling. But they bring distress to people around them as well and just as much if not worse.

ASPD, psychopathy and narcissists are vindictive as a PERSONALITY trait and if you do your research properly - revenge as a maladaptive personality trait is a hallmark of ASPD and psychopathy, not just a one time thing like a 17 year old girl getting revenge with her best friend on her cheating partner (teenagers are impulsive and dumb they'd be more prone to this behavior than adults). But with personality disorders it is a pattern of behavior. And their revenge-seeking is an epidemic in the world of psychological abuse survivors because that's often what psychological abuse survivors complain of is the cluster-b persons vindictive behavior towards them for unrighteous reasons, that the cluster b thinks is righteous but thats the distortions and delusions they have. And part of that maladaptive trait is along with the lack of emotional (sometimes cognitive) empathy they don't have that line in the sand they won't cross, meaning they don't have limits on how far they're willing to hurt people making them inherently wrong for their behaviors.

People with cluster b disorders have danger behaviors, disregard the RIGHTS over others which is inherently abusive and cruel behavior, they have exploitative, entitled, and generally shitty behaviors make up a majority of their personality disorder traits. It's disorders that have to do with HARMING and disregarding other people whereas disorders like ADHD don't do that.

Neuroscientists psychopathy and ASPD:

Dr Keel

Dr. Raine

Dr. Robert Hare 

Dr Kevin Dutton

Books: 

Handbook of psychopathy

Hervey Cleckley's original 1940's checklist that Hare basically admitted the PCL-R is based off of.

Npd:

Dr kernberg

Dr. W. Keith Campbell

Dr. Kraig malkin 

Dr. James Masterson

Dr Steve reed

Dr Elinor Greenberg 

Dr. Marie-France Hirigoyen, a psychoanalyst

Frank Yeomans

Very cool, not reading all that, also I am quite literally Diagnosed With NPD

[penguin--person]

Solstice (srs/lttm from rain world)?

im so fucking normal about them you have no idea im so fucking normal im so normal you have to believe me i swear im normal i fuckings wear man im normal im so fucking normal

going along with the popular 'suns is treated like a god in their colony' headcannon, i dont think suns liked being worshiped - but, i do think he misses it. he knows it wasnt healthy, but he still does. this isnt me saying he wants moon to worship him, No, he Doesn't . and i mean that. slash serious. in my headcanon, moon's colony was religious too, but unlike suns' 'we can indulge in wordly pleasures as long as suns is ok with it and as long as its for him', there were more monks there. didn't starve themseleves, no, but. they did deprive themselves of lifes joys n shit . like the typical ancient. so. nothing irregular.

i think they'd date before the events of the main game

they meet through pebbles, maybe. suns mentions talking to pebbles not long after he was activated in one of the broadcasts in spearmasters campaign. maybe when pebbles talked about moon, how he wanted to be independent n all that, he went and spoke to moon herself.

and! while he understood pebbles' frustration. i think. m. he foud moon's kindness comforting. sweet lady. i headcanon them to be somewhat of a group senior, too, though maybe like.. not the oldest. moon gen1, suns gen2, smth. so. i think he'd find her comforting. and. he'd keep talking to her.

he'd maybe mention it once to pebbles, but wouldn't mention how their friendship is turning into a romantic one !! though like. qpr. ive got so many thoughts on how iterators perceive relationships you dont even know... like, i think the lines are blurry for them, what is platonic and what romantic. so i think it's not comparable to any relationship any human being has had.. though, maybe.. in the neolithic age n shit.. broken femur... "life is cruel but i'll stand by you and love you even when you're doing bad" n shit. whateverrr no one look at me. though efel free to ask me about my thoughts on the iterator relationships:3

so !! so . i think. moon would find him silly. she'd be happy pebbles has someone as kind as him as a friend, tutor.. . she'd see that suns is hurt, that they're depressed, don't see much point in trying to find the solution, but still try, because, what else is there to do? i think she'D try to help them see the joy in life. and maybe she'd succeed a bit. but, you can't drag a person out of depression on your own, ya know? not to say moon doesn't have her own problems - she also defineely has some kind of depression, i'd bet all iterators do, even if they don't know it. they've got mental illnesses we can't even fahtom.

so !! m. i also think they'd just be silly. moon would give a lot to the relationship, but, she's bad at setting boundaries, yea? like. take the whole pebbles thing as an example. she didn't force communicattions until she absolutely had to . i think she lets a lot of things slide, but, she's not oblivious! she just. i dont knowww i dont wanna mischaracterize her. shes not stupid. shes not dumb. she tells suns if he goes too far. but i dont think she's mean about it. moon never kills the slugcat. i don't think she'd ever really get angry with him - upset, yes, but she understands what he's going through.. and, as group seniour, even though they're not in the same group (but considers him part), wants to help him get better.

i don't think it'd be interely healthy, but, it'd be interesting! like. like. when you're climbing out of depression, you sometimes latch onto something that brings you joy soo much that you don't even care about the side effects. like. you don't fcare if you're depriving yourself of sustance, you don't care if you're harming yourself or the thing, or if the thing is harming you, you don't care if its unhealthy. it brings you joy! and joy is so hard to come by. for me, at least. this is filled with so much projection and self indulgence if u couldnt tell lol

but. they do love each other! they care for each other!! suns isnt using her, and moon isnt stupid and ignoring his faulst ! she knows they are there! but she trusts he'll get better. and suns hopes he will, too.

he'd help moon, too. he'd listen to her frustrations, encourage her to share her feelings. and she would. i dont think suns would know how to help her, really, but he'd listen - and sometimes, even that is rlly helpful.

he sends spearmaster to her, one cycle, with a pearl. an engagement:) old ancient way, exchanging jewelry.

he feels even shittier when the main events of the game happen. because. they weren't publically engaged/married/dating/qpr/whatever the fuck theyve got going on. so he can't. talk about it that much. he does tell nsh eventually n they're like, "why didnt you tell us. like literally its fine. i get pebbles would be upset, but, its fine" . and. m. so. relationships were tabboo in ancient culture, yes? ties you down to the cycle, turns you into an echo and shit. karma three, family and friendship. moon wouldn't be as aprehensive - she knows the local group wouldn't shun them, or at least would come around eventually. but she respects suns' boundary !! i think. he'd be scared. that the ancients would be disapointed in him or something. that iterators would shun and hate him.

i can't explain more of that without evolving this into a longer rant than it already is. so i wont. but feel free to send more asks:3