#they meet at a school meeting idk and their personalities click and just bro out | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lowkeyclueless5137 · 3 years ago

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First things first

Bear with my dumbness...

Second: this will be a crossover explanation...

Third: It will be Hella long so... Yep... :/

So... I found out about this game called 'Obey Me!' and a lot of people are making crossovers with Twst... Like... I didn't know why they actually found some comune points, especially since obey me! was an otome game... But like... That was before I did my homework on it.

And by homework I mean seeing some of the wiki articles and browsing through the Fandom's memes... Because memes are educational...

And somehow... I reached a conclusion: Man... This could actually work... This is another clownhouse!

That and the fact that I am a sucker for Mammon angst and Dialuci content... This is ma main ship for this one... And I'm a simp for fluffy ships. :D

If I had to pick a favorite... I would say either Mammon, Beel, Belphie or Satan... IDK but it clicks with me.

Anyway... Still not entirely through the whole game plot... But like... I have a somewhat general idea of it.

You know this isn't my first rodeo when I pick something to crossover and dive headfirst without knowing actually a lot about it. So don't come @ me about it... I am fully aware of what I am doing and I am an idiot who still does it because why not...

:D yeah... And this will have mammon angst because I said it and I'll say it again: I'm a sucker for it... I can relate to his big bro kind of thing to some degrees since I have a little sis that's acting like she's above me.

Funny story: this shit was supposed to be posted on Wattpad before the new update on the main story came... So like... When it came out I was all like:

😐😑😐😬

Anyway... Let's put the set-up... I saw that those crossovers usually have the MC accidentally going from twst to devildom or vice versa and Yada-Yada... Some have the thing where the two MCs are siblings or similar looking and so they change their place... And some have that trope of 'school fest' And bring the 2 MCs together...

No... What I have in mind is different...

What IF Mammon was the MC for this.

Like... The 7 Brothers get in an accident... And trying to protect their hooman exchange student (let's say after OM!MC meet everyone and brought them together), mammon uses a lot of his magic.

The 7 of them get isekaied... And because he used so much of his magic, mammon accidentally gets stripped off his demon powers. Meaning no magic at all. At the others we'll get back in just a sec.

You can imagine that any normal person's reaction to Grim blowing you up from a coffin is to scream and run off. Well... Mammon is squaring up with the fire cat. (Ace is that you?) BUT once he realises that 'oh no! I don't have magic anymore'... He breaks in a run to escape Grim.

Well... As they get caught by headmaster Crowley, the rest of the ceremony goes smoothly. The 6 remaining brothers still have their magic, but they didn't do such a ruckus, trying to play along and then figure out what exactly happened. They get sorted into dorms(And sorry if it isn't how you imaginated, but it's for the story):

Lucifer- Scarabia (I wanted to say diasomnia, but like... I see him as a deep planner and this will serve good in the future)

Leviatan- Ignihyde (Look... You can't tell me he isn't at least a bit above the average with tech handling)

Satan- Heartslabyul (he's happy he's not in the same dorm as Lucifer, but once someone points out that his pen color is almost the same at his, Satan throws another existential tantrum)

Asmo- Poemfiore (A lot of people said that he's perfect for this role and I won't complain)

Beezelbub- Savanaclaw (He's like... A somewhat combination of Ruggie and Jack... IDK why I feel like that about it but anyway...)

Belphiegor- Diasomnia (sleeping buddies with silver... You can't tell me otherwise)

They are all first years :D

And now... Mammon returns! Dragged by Crowley. The mirror sees no magic out of him, because remember: he was stripped off of it. And so, the mirror says that he isn't fit for any dorm.

Well... Now the brothers say that he's their bro... He must have magic too. But the mirror says no. Well... Crowley asks for the mirror to guide mammon back once everyone else leaved.

The mirror says that he doesn't belong anywhere. Welp... Nice way to say you're not welcome anywhere. Points for the mirror for being a straight forward Lil shit... :/ the bros tried to summon a portal back to devildoom, but it didn't work.

So with that... Mammon realises that 'Hey... If I'm not a demon anymore, that means no more sin to take in account!' at least that was sorted out.

Crowley dumps Mammon in Ramshackle. Mammon is positive about it because he has a whole dorm for himself. This is now the Mammon cave! Only for the great Mammon!

And Grim... Who came in here because of the rain.

And also the ghosts, who scared the crap out of the 2.

Yeah... The 2 have to cooperate after another attempt at squaring up one against another. (seriously... Is this Ace 2.0?!) and surprisingly... They do a good job.

And Crowley is in tears when he realises that Mammon and Grim can cooperate. Srsly dude... It was for survival... So Mammon and Grim are now handymans of the NRC! Yay... Let's hope this place doesn't end up on fire.

Meanwhile... The bros get to know a bit of their dorm heads. Satan is a good kid... And respects the rules. He wants to read something for the first night so he did ask Riddle from where he could access the library. The redhead is pleased that at least someone is willing to learn. (Adeuce... He's looking at you 2) Satan is rooming with Ace and Deuce... So... Good luck with that.

Beel wants food... Beel eats the most out of the savanaclaw kids. They are happy to dump their veggies on Beel, cuz he's like a living vaccum for food. No Beel, you can't eat Ruggie. We know he smells like donuts, but it's not food. He rooms with Jack.

Lucifer adapts Jamil's resting bitch face when he sees Kalim... That's it... That's the whole interaction. He rooms with 3 other scarabia students, including scarabia resident B (man... We Stan you... You gorgeous NPC)

Asmo and Vil are like besties now... They are still coming in terms with who's the most pretty. And it doesn't help that Rook compliments both of them to no end (Srsly, dude... Stop... You're fueling their egos even more). Epel asks what's wrong with these people. He's rooming with Asmo, which sucks.

Levi doesn't interact with almost anyone... Except Ortho. This baby boy is trying to get closer to Levi because he reminds him of his nii-san! He's rooming alone thankfully.

Belphie needs to be dragged along silver back to diasomnia because they fell asleep. He's rooming with Sebek so... We don't know how to feel about it.

First day of school rolls around. Mammon is cleaning the main street with Grim when he meets up with his bros. They asked headmaster Crowley if he did get mammon out, but he said no... And so they found him.

Cue some mean remarks that mammon lost his magic and now he's cleaning after everyone. Satan is giving all of his attention to Grim. Cuz he cat. Mammon gets smug about it and says that Grim and him are a duo and that means Satan cannot bring him to Heartslabyul or pet him for the matter.

At least Satan is not attacking Mammon... If he puts good with him, maybe he'll let him pet Grim. All for the cat! Must. Spoil. The. Cat. (Don't spoil him... He'll become even more of a little shit!)

Yeah... That and the fact that the only other cat in here is Lucius and he avoids Satan. So like... Grim is the only option I guess.

Yeah... Ace comes into picture... And explains about the great seven. Satan did read about them in a history book Riddle lend to him yesterday until he got to the library today. So he had an idea about them. The others faked that they know about it. Mammon legit was the one who didn't even fake it.

And so Ace Gets to Diss a bit Mammon and Grim. Yeah... Grim is squaring up this time for good. (mammon... Meet your spiritual twin: Ace)

Yeah... The brothers let Mammon do his thing. They don't interfere because they don't want to be kicked out of the school. On top of that, Mammon cannot be expelled... So he has a pass.

Yeah... The prologue rolls almost the same except is dumb, dumber, more dumb and the dumbest, all in a mass chaos. The cojoin forces over their iminent fear and survival desire. The blot monster gets defeated through sheer dumbass luck.

Yet once they meet the overBlot monster, Mammon involuntary turns in his demon form. You know... Panic^4 (-why are you panicked, mammon?! -I don't know?!?)

And after that, Mammon is detransforming again involuntary. This, of course is a panic motive... Cuz it means that when he was stripped off his magic, the magic goes to those monsters. Hence when meeting one of them he transforms... (I have my own lore shit in here...)

Mammon has to fill the 3 up with his situation, forcing Grim, ace and Deuce to promise that they won't tell anything about it to anyone.

Back at the Heartslabyul dorm, ace gets collared and Satan interrogates Deuce as to why he returned so late... Deuce optes to not respond.

Satan goes full detective mode. (box 15 plays in the distance)

And so, Ace crashes in the Ramshackle. (-it's the mammon cave dammit!) as much as mammon plays tsundere, he still let's ace stay overnight and goes to the point of letting the ginger in the best room our of there.

And Mammon has the wierd af mirror dream. :D

The next day, mammon proposes to get help from Satan. Since the blonde probably got his hands on the rules in that dorm.

Lucky, now Mammon is enrolled with Grim as one student... And in the same class as Adeuce and Satan(1-A). Lucifer was in Jack and Epel's class(1-B), while Levi and Asmo in Sebek's(1-D), the twins being in class 1-C.

Satan is suspecting that something happened with those 4...they are suddenly best friends out of the blue. And Deuce was pretty shaken up last night. So Satan takes the opportunity to try and see what the hell are these 4 up to. (and pet Grim, but that's now a side objective)

Satan revised and knows most of the rules of the Queen of hearts... So he proposes for them to bake a tart as an apology token.

For that, they go to Trey. And so they make a maroon tart. Satan had a somewhat bad feeling about it, but he couldn't pinpoint why.

Only when it was too late and realised that maroon tarts were forbidden at an unbirthday party, Satan realized that... They fucked up. And Riddle kicked out all 5 of them.

At this, Ace riots along Satan. They skimm through the rules of the school and realise that oh fuck, they could actually dethrone Riddle. Satan says why not... He can prove that he's better than Lucifer by becoming a dorm head!

Mammon has a bad feeling about it. He holds Grim in his arms and watches as Satan and the Adeuce combo duel Riddle and lose against the 'off with your head'.

They fail, but their action started a riot in the Heartslabyul dorm. And that pissed Riddle to no End. Someone accidentally threw an egg at Satan's face, trying to aim for the redhead. Yeah... This made the blonde to be only wrath rn and ignore the fact that Riddle too was angry to no end.

And Riddle overblotted. This pissed Satan more that made him turn in his demon form. Mammon was involuntary turned, so he was protecting the innocents along Trey.

You know... When an unstoppable force meets an unmoving object?

Yeah... This is Riddle and Satan right now. Neck in neck. They are keeping up with each other incredibly good. The difference was that Satan was acompanied by the Heartslabyul students and Mammon with Grim. That led to the overBlot's defeat.

After that, mammon falls in a rosebush since he was in the air when he again detransformed involuntary. And he's unconscious, even if in his mind, he got front row seats at Riddle's trauma recall.

Now, unlike the others, Mammon feels a bit simpatic towards the redhead. He too wanted to listen to Lucifer... But his rules sometimes had to be broken. Mostly for his other brother's sake or because his sin was pushing him to.

So he gets his way to convince Satan to not murder someone after things had settled down. Still can't pet Grim... But anyway.

The unbirthday party redo is a somewhat succes... Excusing Riddle's extremely salty tart. (cater was enjoying it though)

Mammon asks Satan to not tell the others about his demon form appearance and the fact that he literally hijacked someone's mind involuntary and saw trauma. Satan said that he will keep his lips tight if he let's him research it. (he also wanted to pet Grim but mammon said to not stretch the cord too much)

After that, Crowley calls the 5 in his office and explained to them about the blot. Mammon gets the ghost camera. (No... He won't lend it to you, Asmo... Pls Asmo... Leave your bro's new camera alone.)

Later, during lunch, Mammon has to choose: sit with his brothers, or with Ace and Deuce. He wanted to go with the latter, but Lucifer dragged him to their table. Save yourself, Grim!

Lucifer nags Satan and Mammon about not calling for the others when the overBlot occurred. Belphie gets his dose of dissing a bit Lucifer by saying that he would have done a bigger mess by bringing another dorm in this. Satan is ready to throw hands. Catch them if you can, Lucifer.

Mammon just... Evaporates from there before Lucifer could hang him up from the ceiling. He forgot they aren't in their house... And so... You know... He goes to Ace and Deuce.

Wierd accidents start to happen, so Crowley assigns Mammon and Grim to solve it, with the promise of letting them play in the opening match for the magishift tournament. So knowing with what he has to deal, he asks for Lucifer's help... But he was busy training cuz he was selected to play for scarabia in the magishift tournament. Same thing with Beel.

He couldn't find Levi, nor Belphie... Asmo was kinda not interested in it, so Mammon had to pull the trump card: Satan

"And why would I help yo-" "I'll let you stay with Grim after classes until the tournament." "Deal."

This... This is legit their convo. Mammon has now Satan on the team! And Ace with Deuce joined because they wanted to prove they could be of use and convince Riddle to let them on the magishift team.

And together they pull an investigation team. Going at Ramshackle after classes to contemplate. Sometimes sleeping over in there. Mammon even read to them bedtime stories at one point.

At one point, Lucifer is targeted. Satan is rubbing it in his face cuz he managed to somehow sprain his foot. (He fell on like... 4 sets of stairs...) Mammon is worried, especially since Trey too fell, and along them more accidents occured. Beel didn't have any mishap yet... But Mammon was worried since they did figure out that only the magishift players were getting injured.

So Riddle and Cater join the investigation team! Hooray! And together they do the Cater check!

Asmo provided to them the Intel from poemfiore. And Beel was really kind to tell them that Savanaclaw didn't have any accidents up until now. And that he made a friend! (Jack wouldn't say exactly a friend, but he can't hide his waving tail.)

Anyway... Now on the matter at hand... Mammon didn't have any bro in Octavinelle... So... They had to spy on the Leech twins. Riddle is so not pleased with this.

Floyd sees them and goes on a blast with the nicknames!

He already named Asmo(Malawi) and Lucifer(Peacock Cichlid). So when Floyd literally names Satan Puffer fish... Yeah... Someone is getting chocked today. :D

Mammon is still shrimpy. So like. He's a nice fried shrimp.

You know Satan had enough of the teasing when he literally almost yeets Floyd over the entire courtyard. The others had to stop him because Floyd isn't a demon and can get injured once you throw him through a stone wall. Satan hopes to not interact more with the Leech twins. (Hope for it, Satan... Cuz it won't happen.)

They find out Ruggie was behind all of this. And chase him around. He escapes... But now they know who the culprit is. And know what they are planning since Beel told to the others that Savanaclaw hates Diasomnia.

Once meeting Jack, who was with Beel, they convince the 2 that indeed, based on the Intel, savanaclaw were the culprits. Beel doesn't really need to be convinced as much as Jack. But they convince them in the end and that's what matters.

Beel alerts Belphigor of the Savanaclaw plan and Riddle's plan... So now Belphie could get Diasomnia on board with it too.

Fortunately, Riddle's plan successfully fooled Savanaclaw. And now they were facing the culprits. When labeled as traitors by their dorm, Jack responded that he was against a dirty way of paying, while Beel responds that no one messes with his twin and his dorm. (Beel is pure and hungry... That's it... That's my whole impression of him)

Yeah... It's safe to say that when Mammon changed in his demon form meant one thing. Already the Heartslabyul boys have dealt with an overBlot. So Satan did require his demon form too.

Beel goes full battle ram mode after he changes in the demon form. Like... Nyop in the blot beast. Belphie attempts homicide on Leona and it's 👌! This time Mammon joins in the fight and not just protects the possible victims, since most of them got evacuated.

Another trauma sequence! Yay! Mammon get ready for a career in therapy! After someone gets you to therapy first.

It's safe to say that Beel and Belphie have question marks about the whole Mammon and overBlot thing. But... Unlike Satan... They couldn't snitch to Lucifer about it even if they wanted to.

Why? Oh... Cuz Lucifer was with Trey, Jamil and the other victims of the accidents in there. Mammon didn't have time to beg the twins to keep it a secret.

Mammon just grabs Grim and wants to get out of there, but Crowley stops them to congratulate on their good job. Crow man... Perfect timing actually! Since it distraught everyone with the magishift opening.

Mammon, Grim, Ace and Deuce along the Ramshackle ghosts play in the opening match against savanaclaw. Mammon gets a murder disk in the head and his brothers(except Beel who's playing against) are cheering for that.

At least he blocked it from marking a point... But now Mammon is in the infirmary since no magic=no demon power=human immunity to both diseases and wounds=flimsy when it comes to a disk coming at an incredible speed towards your head. (I hit it with some logic shit in here and my poor braincell now needs to be poked with a stick)

When he wakes up, Mammon is meet with Ace, Deuce and Grim, who fill him up on what he had missed. After that, they meet Cheeka. Their reactions are still priceless.

I also saw that a lot of people theorise that Mammon raised Satan... So we will go with that too... I'm down with it because it's fluffy, angsty and good to work with.

Anyway... With that... Mammon naturally was good with kids. So handling for a bit Cheeka and take him off Leona was like a breeze. Levi and his video-games are harder to break up.

After Cheeka leaved, the demon bros came in the picture. Oh... This was bound to be something.

Lucifer was mad... Like... REALLY mad. Cuz Mammon didn't tell them at all about the involuntary demon form changing. And also about the recklessness of Mammon and Satan, who was the one who dropped Grim off in there. Mammon was silent and after all of them leaved he groaned and asked to be left a bit to nap since he felt still tired.

It was a lie, but Mammon felt like he really needed that.

After some time... The exams come. Lucifer wasn't letting any of the brothers to slack off. He basically invited himself in Ramshackle and bossed everyone into learning. Mammon did have to slack a few times since Crowley was a lil shit who dumped work on him. That ended up with him not being believed and then hanged off the ceiling. Yeah... Hard times for Mammon. Grim is angry cuz he is the boss here, not Lucifer.... And that's his henchman you are hanging!

So when one night, Asmo crashes in Ramshackle, Mammon isn't surprised. It was one day before the exam results will be announced and Asmo was really panicky.

So Mammon gets for him a glass of water and invites him to the bed to cuddle. No wierd things, just cuddling. Since in there electricity was inexistent, Mammon was using a candle that Grim lit up.

He did ask Asmo why he was so scared after he calmed down. Asmo said that he wanted to score good in the exams because if he does, Vil will borrow to him his electric brush for a month. So he cut off a deal with Azul. And now he had doubts and a looming fear about it. Now he realised how stupid was that.

Mammon just suggests to think positively about it before reading to Asmo a bed time story. At this point, Mammon did borrow several bed time books in case of a surprise guest appearing in the middle of the night and in need of something to relax/distract themselves/fall asleep.

The day of the results came and Asmo scored good! He was happy.

But... So did most of the others... Asmo was 51 on the list. Mammon had a mediocre score, being bearly in the first 100, but still passed so it's OK!

Yeah... Asmo got an anemone as a new accessory along Ace, Deuce and Grim.

Mammon gets along Jack and meet again the tweels, yet this time... They meet the man behind all of this mass slavery: Azul.

All the 6 Brothers want to save Asmo. But when it was brought up about giving up their powers for it... They went all like 'no'.

Yet, Mammon says why not. Azul is ready to shake Hands when Mammon says that he has no spec of magic. Azul proposes then: to steal a photo from the Atlantic memorial museum. If he fails, Mammon will have to give up Ramshackle. If he actually succeeds, the anemones get free.

Lucifer says that this is surely a scam since Mammon can't pull this. He demands for Azul to give to him a task so he could save the anemones, but Azul says That it's all up to Mammon's decision. He gives him one day of thinking.

All day, Lucifer and the other brothers except the twins, pester Mammon into putting Lucifer to do a task instead of him.

That night, Mammon gets visited by Tsunotarou for the first time. While his new friend was talking about gargoyles, Mammon was thorn in between accepting the deal or leaving Lucifer to handle it. He asked Tsunotarou what he thinks about it and he did reply that Mammon should follow his heart, since this was about the family.

After tsunotarou dissappears, the twins crash at Ramshackle. Mammon welcomes them in the only good bed from there. Beel does ask what he intends to do tomorrow and what would happen to Asmo.

Mammon tells them just that Asmo will be alright.

The big day came. And Mammon was confident in this. He was with Lucifer, Adeuce, Jack and Beel in the office. Azul had the contact on the desk and Mammon was face to face with him.

Mammon chooses to get Azul the desired photo. He had 3 days to do so.

Lucifer is again mad. As well as the other bros. Beel wasn't though. He saw Mammon being confident in himself and decides to help him out. The others said 'No' and let Mammon to go on his own merry way. Lucifer was trying to force Azul onto calling off the deal.

So yeah... Everything was going off just like in cannon. Except this time Lucifer was still pestering Azul.

It was at the peak of Mammon's plan (he did get the photo) when Lucifer does Leona's opsie and burns the contracts before Azul's eyes. Mammon just returns with Jack, Beel, Grim, Adeuce and the Leech twins. Floyd adds more fuel to the fire.

OverBlot go brrrrrrrrrrr.

Yeah... Lucifer gets a taste of having no magic since Azul targeted him first. Mammon is having Beel and Asmo now as the only demons besides him who could actually fight. Floyd uses to deflect the opponent's attacks with bind the heart as Ace, Deuce, Jade, Ruggie and Leona attack.

They defeat him! Yay! And everything comes back to somewhat normal.

Asmo give to Lucifer the credit for freeing him. Azul just pats Mammon on the shoulder and offers to him a favor from the house part. Cuz it was somewhat painful to see that. Mammon will take it in account and thanks him anyway.

Now... After this chaos was settled... The Winter holiday was coming up. Mammon was invited to the Diasomnia party by Tsunotarou himself. Belphie invites only Beel and Asmo to come. Asmo turns down the offer, saying that he goes out on the holiday, on an opportunity to get as an actor. Levi was busy with his games. So that leaves 3 options. Belphie is OK with just Beel.

Mammon doesn't say anything about his invitation from Tsunotarou, since he knows the others will butt in.

His handyman jobs became more easy to manage, so Mammon and Grim planned to have a feast at Ramshackle along the ghosts. They invited Levi and Satan over, but Levi again said no. Satan was ok with just having Grim, so he tagged along. Mammon was planning to have a good time along Satan. Like they used to have before! He already had in mind a bunch of fun activities they could do! Reading books, talking about stories, making cookies, making some snow builds, even playing with the ghosts in the snow was on board too.

Well... This gets scrapped off when they meet Jamil in the kitchens along Lucifer, who drags the 3 along to scarabia for intense training.

Marches through the desert ended mostly with Mammon worming his way towards the smallest speck of water. Thank goodness for Kalim and oasis maker. Mammon was so so tired! Lucifer and Satan weren't, but the other Scarabia students were beat up by this intensive routine.

Mammon was locked up in a room with Grim and Satan. He wasn't having it. Not at all. He wanted a fun holiday... Not this! He did call Ace and Deuce and the 2 were worried about this.

So Mammon plans to escape! This would piss off Lucifer, so Satan is on board with it too. They do try to escape after some time, but when the magical carpet picks only Mammon and Grim, he's unable to get Satan. He tried. He really did try to get him, he even attempted to somehow turn around the carpet. But it only threw Grim and Mammon into Octavinelle.

Yeah... The twins and Azul vouche for them. After that, Mammon asks if it's possible to get Satan out of there too. The octatrio are a bit surprised about the situation at Scarabia, but at Mammon's request, since Azul did say he could ask for a favor out of him, they had to go and get Satan out of there.

And also investigate wtf was going on in there.

Lucifer is popping a vein when he sees Mammon returning, with the octatrio. Satan is curious about it, especially since they were rooming with him. Azul did get his sweet time into changing the ways of training for the Scarabia students. That did show signs that something shady was going on before their arrival.

So once they piece it together, Mammon has a plan! He doesn't really guarantee it'll work 100%, but that's why he shared it with Satan, Grim and the octatrio. They put their minds to comune and finally shaped Mammon's plan to an absolute success.

And it worked! If by working meant exposing Jamil, then pushing him to go apeshit and into overBlot, then throwing our group and lucifer with Kalim, across the entire Scarabia.

Yeah... It worked! Anyway!

Lucifer turns into his demon form and manages to grab Kalim and the twins, while Mammon catches Satan and Azul with Grim. At this point, they were way too far and even with flying they wouldn't get back in a good period. Lucifer blames Mammon for his stupid plan.

And you know what? Mammon snaps. He's tired, he's depressed, he's constantly ignored and bullied by his own brothers.... He's done... He's completely done with it.

He tells Lucifer that if he wasn't so prideful, this wouldn't have happened. He was able to prevent that from the very start, but he didn't. Mammon hated how Lucifer stuck his nose in his business. He hated how his bros are coming at night to him for reassurance, then the next day they are like he's the biggest scum on the earth. He wanted to spend some quality time with Satan for the holiday, since Lucifer didn't give a damn about him when he was little. But no... He has to now deal with another overBlot.

Yeah... It's safe to say that Mammon was furious. And the others speechless.

Mammon tells Kalim to make a river with oasis maker, since he knows the twins could swim fast. With that in mind, Mammon and lucifer had to fly, the second born holding Grim, while the twins carried Azul, Satan and Kalim.

They did reach quickly to the overBlot scene, but Mammon was so mad, that he punched it in the face. Like... Legit he was trying to throw all of his anger onto the overBlot. It was victorious! But Mammon was so mad, that he only stood one night at Scarabia after Kalim and Azul insisted that he's in desperate need of rest.

The next day, Mammon was out of there when he meet up with Adeuce. They were really worried when Mammon was so mad and told them that not one of his brothers is welcome anymore in Ramshackle.

So Ace and Deuce are OK with it, and try to make Mammon feel better. They do all of the activities Mammon planned to do with Satan. At night, Mammon meets up with Tsunotarou and explains to him what happened when he didn't show up. But now he reassures him that he's free now and they could spend time together if Tsunotarou is up for it too.

They share some hot coco and talk about gargoyles... :D

Yeah... Mammon ignores at all his brothers. They aren't welcome anymore in Ramshackle, they couldn't get in touch with him no matter what they tried and also Mammon ignored them whenever they would directly try to approach him. To make some kind of money too, since Crowley wasn't planning on giving to him and Grim more than the bare minimum, Mammon got himself as a Monstro lounge employee, since Azul did pay a adequate sum for the labour. He was good at it. He wasn't going to force Grim to get a job too, but he did appreciate when the monster would cuddle with him and purr before bed. Grim was taking pity onto Mammon's situation and he was trying to ease a bit his Henchman.

Adeuce and Jack weren't oblivious to this at all... Ace and Deuce would find any kind of excuses so that Mammon won't go to Heartslabyul or with Satan. Jack too... They would invite Mammon to hang out after clubs or sometimes even in other places around the campus. Grim was very much welcome to do mishaps along them.

Asmo, who got back from the holiday, had to be filled in with what happened. Of course, Lucifer's version and Satan's version were quite different, so Asmo had to get a 3rd party's story in order to have the general idea of what happened. So he asked Rook to help him with it. The hunter was delighted with that! So he did provide the information to the best of his abilities... Which... Is surprisingly a lot of info...

Asmo is a bit worried about Rook's ways, but also... About the total chaos that happened in Scarabia.

So, the lust Avatar is proposing for his brothers to go and dine at monstrolounge, since Asmo did get a good sum of cash from his internship... Mammon of course didn't know about this and neither did the others.

So it was a surprise for Mammon, who was wiping the bar when he sees his brothers getting a table. And a close one to him on top of it.

So he asks for Jade to vouche for him so he could finish his shift earlier. In exchange, Jade can have that wierd mushroom that is growing in Ramshackle's basement. The eel is content with that, but Floyd gets in between them, oblivious of this, and puts Mammon to serve at another table.

Good thing! It was in the opposite part of the lounge. Mammon takes the said order and Jade takes the brothers's order. Asmo asks if it's possible for Mammon to bring to them their orders because Asmo wanted to talk to him, yet Jade says that employees can't slack on the job just to talk with clients, whether they are people they know or not.

Mammon overhears their convo and it's really grateful Azul had those rules in the first place.. So with that, he has a somewhat ease when Jade tells to another employer to send the order. The eel asked if Mammon was still up for the early shift, but this time he refuses. Jade is sad he couldn't get his hands on those mushrooms... But he'll get the opportunity another time.

After that incident, Asmo is dead set on talking to Mammon. And Good thing the VDC was coming! Asmo heard from Vil about him using the Ramshackle as a training camp for the contestants, so Asmo is polishing his skills at dancing and singing. He's going to get that place in the training camp. He pushed his brothers to come to for the audition.

Mammon comes too to the audition, but more like to support Grim. He meets Ortho! And he's really nice to him, unlike someone. They bond!

Satan is like... Super jealous on them rn. The rest of the younger brothers are jealous too. Their Mammon is spending time with a kid he bearly meet like they are bros. Levi, who was dragged all the way in here by Lucifer, is handling the worse. So he straight up goes to Mammon while Lucifer is in the audition room. Mammon of course wants to avoid him, but also to not cause a scene.

Levi only asks him when he plans on giving to him back that movie he borrowed from him. The Otaku panicked, especially since he knows Ortho the most out of the brothers and he knows the kid CAN blow up this place if so desired.

Mammon tells that he'll get it to Ignihyde after the audition. For now, he has to support his friends!

Meanwhile, Satan tries to bribe in Grim, but it doesn't work... The fire Raccoon monster isn't having it. Ya made his henchman feel like shit... Of course he will treat you like shit too. And Grim refuses to acknowledge them, no matter how much tuna will they bring. (Grim has a huge character development and we appreciate him for that.)

The auditions were shit on the most part. Vil has to dig up the best of the best for it. Rook proposes a few names.

Later that day, Ortho came to Levi with the movie Mammon borrowed, saying that Mammon himself tasked the boy with delivering to Levi the said DVD... Levi internally is a mess.

So... Weather or not Mammon likes it, Levi is crashing at Ramshackle that night. It's the first night actually, but Levi needs some emotional reassurance and his big bro is the only one who can offer something like that.

That and the fact that Ortho kicked him out of there until he makes up with 'the nice Mr Mammon'. He got beat up by a kid... Levi isn't ready to face to his brothers or the public that kind of humiliation.

Seeing how it was rainy outside, Mammon skeptically welcomes inside Levi, giving him some warm tea and spare clothing since the envy Avatar came drenched in rain.

Levi stops Mammon from going upstairs. He... Just apologises for being so ignorant and treating him like a scum. They are the biggest brother besides lucifer, they need to be united... He will try now to not be a jerk to Mammon anymore. And also... Levi missed the Mammon cuddles. Mammon is content with this apology. He too missed a bit Levi, but now it's OK... They are willing to build again what they destroyed.

So they have a movie night, since Levi did bring in some movies and a laptop to watch them on. Grim was in Mammon's lap, purring at his caressing, yet no kind of response to Levi. Grim is still salty... When it comes to the bed time, unlike the other brothers who only saw Mammon already in pijamas, Levi could see a glimpse of him changing when Mammon searched for his pijama blouse, shirtless.

And also the wounds and scars Mammon had on him. They weren't just from the overBlots... Nonono... They were also from the fights he had and from Lucifer's hanging. Mammon was practically a human now... So that meant that he could get easily hurt. Levi now realised that it wasn't like back in the Devildoom, where Mammon was constantly getting punished without an actual lasting consequence and not getting hurt more than just a scratch. In here, Mammon was really really careful, since his body was now more fragile and more prone to getting severe injures.

Levi decided that he has to prove to Mammon that he is caring for him too. Not just a verbal apology and some cuddling. Levi decided that it's better to have his actions speak. Like in that anime he bingie watched a month ago!

So... Levi now spends some quality time with Mammon. He gets to meet Ace, Deuce and Jack. The first years are skeptical of this. And Levi is shy af, because you know... Socialising... But they somewhat get along. Mammon is happy about it, which has become a rare thing to see him actually happy since the Scarabia fiasco. Progress, people! This is some progress!

The audition results come and Mammon almost gets an arrow shoot through his neck. Mammon does get the letter from there.

Ace, Deuce and surprisingly Levi, passed the audition! Mammon and Grim were required to come to poemfiore for some important things.

So they meet with Kalim and Jamil on the way in there! And again get blinded by poemfiore students... Literally this guys are radiating sparkles. Levi believes that they must be from an anime he watched back at Devildom: 'I accidentally entered into a dorm where all the students are radiating light and sparkles because of their unreal beauty'

So yeah, Vil informs Mammon of Crowley's plan of making Ramshackle(-The Mammon cav- ya know what... I give up with it) a training camp. And since Crowley kind of promised some decent renovations. Mammon couldn't say no.

Along the 5 in the group, it's added Vil, Rook, Asmo and Epel, which makes them a total of 9. Vil made the said song they will be going to use. Levi is dying with shyness. Why did he have to accept to go to audition??? Why did Lucifer have to drag him to it??? Mammon awkwardly patts him for a somewhat reassurance.

Asmo knows that with this, he can talk with Mammon about everything that happened while he was away. He has a genius plan!

Yeah... His 'Genius' plan, gets scrapped off when the training camp shows to be hell. It was intensive and with a lot of restrictions. Normally Asmo would be content with that, but now he needs a bit of time to talk with Mammon.

Well... Mammon sure becomes suspicious when he has late night convos with the mouse in the mirror and sometimes he would find pure white feathers where he slept. He didn't exactly feel prone to acting Greedy like he used to and he had a back itch, but that might as well be from his most recent wounds. Bandages sure are annoying. (I am the only one who actually has unexpected itching when wearing a bandage... Like bruh...)

So, at night, Asmo slithers out along the Adeuce combo and Mammon to the fridge. Levi again was up watching anime, so like... He did spot them. Asmo wanted to initiate a convo with the second born, when they get hit by Vil's UM because they ate from the forbidden food. Mammon didn't eat. He was out for a glass of water to shake a bit himself. Kind of unfair that Grim gets cursed too, since Vil did say he and Grim are allowed to eat whatever they want. Levi gets a shot to laugh at the ones on the floor, until Vil catches him and sends him to bed.

When the big argument Epel and Deuce have with Vil and Ace Commece, it's not really pleasent. Asmo still tries to talk with Mammon. Levi is scared to the bone by this and Mammon holds Grim in his arms, not wanting to let him go and cause more chaos.

Done with the bad attempts at communication, Asmo goes to Kalim. Kalim is really sociable, so Asmo can get an idea about why Mammon was avoiding him.

Yeah... It didn't exactly go well when Kalim became depressed about it. He told Asmo that Mammon was tired of the way he has been treated by his bros and that it would be better if they leave him alone.

Asmo understands that Kalim had trauma now and Mammon was mad at the way he was mistreated. Welp... Asmo just respects Mammon's wish. He seems to have made it up with Levi, so Asmo isn't going to pry on it. He's going to concentrate on the VDC and give Mammon his needed space.

Mammon doesn't fail to observe that. He appreciates that at least one of his brothers got the message and it's willing to respect his decision. And out of all of them, it was the only one who wasn't on campus at all during the incident, meaning at first he had no clue about it.

After Deuce and Epel return, the training is back on track. And the VDC finally comes.

There is a legit festival, so Mammon and Grim visit most of the club booths and talk a bit with their friends. They were back in time to see the rehearsal performances.

And also meet Neige. Neige heard about mammon and wants to meet him too, since he saw Vil talked to him and it looks like Mammon was the group's manager. Grim of course was perched on his shoulders like usual. Mammon actually helped Neige with a lost backstage pass and that's how the 2 got to talk.

While the NRC group were having their rehearsal, Neige went to get to know Mammon. They were vibing a bit mostly since Grim kept Mammon busy, so he didn't really talk a lot with Neige.

You know how Levi is the avatar of envy? (it rhymes... It actually rhymes and I don't know how to feel about it)

Yeah... He feels the envy. He's also envious too a bit. Cuz like Neige's performance was so childish and pure, it was almost like he didn't care about the competition. Which made Levi theorise that Neige, being a superstar, means that his fans will vote for him no matter what he presents. Yeah... He's having some self doubt hours rn.

Oh... And Vil, being so envious, does pick Levi's attention. He tells it to Mammon, who tells it to Rook, who brings in Kalim and Jamil. Asmo wanted to talk to Mammon at that time, but he got again stopped when Mammon sprinted after Vil along the others who knew what was up. Asmo was leaved with Epel, Ace and Deuce. Mammon knows that once they busted Vil's plan and he changed involuntary into his demon form, that shit's about to hit the fan.

Y'all wanna see dramatic? This is OverBlot Vil for ya! A dramatic queen indeed. *-*

Having to deal with poisonous gas, Jamil uses snake whisper on Neige and his friends to go and distract the crowd from the colloseum. Kalim, Asmo and Rook are on defense as Epel goes feral along ADeuce and Levi. Go feral my boys!

Yeah... At one point Asmo almost gets smashed by a poisonous apple if it wasn't for Mammon who grabbed him from there. They bearly defeat the overBlot because of the poisoned gas that affected them. Thank goodness Kalim had high poison tolerance along Jamil and that Deuce found his unique magic in the last moment.

Rook has that romantic and dramatic moment with Vil's unconscious body. Asmo proposes that the two should fuck, but gets stopped by Jamil. (Bonus points for Jamil keeping the innocents still innocent)

Vil does apologise... Also his overBlot was somewhat excused because he became conscious of his own actions... So in a way... He gets forgiven... Epel will keep it in mind for future blackmail. He wants to wear his favorite pants and now Vil won't stop him with the blackmail!

Tsunotarou comes, since Mammon gave to him the VDC ticket... Levi gave it to ortho and Asmo gave it to Satan, so they were yet to arrive.

Mammon is dumb and greets Malleus with the silly nickname. Everyone, including Asmo and Levi are SHOOK. More surprising when actually Malleus seems pleased with the name. Mammon finally finds out that his friend is actually the Malleus Draconia. He still calls him Tsunotarou. Malleus appreciates that his friend isn't afraid of him. And because he needs to return the 'gift' (VDC ticket) Mammon gave to him, Malleus fixes the stage and makes it like new.

Yay! :D

Asmo finally gets to talk a bit with Mammon. He does want to start everything over... And he's willing to give Mammon space... So that is settled.

The VDC is a success... They still lose... Belphie is out for blood... Rook shall sleep with one eye open at night.

In all of that frenzy, Satan gets his way to talk with Mammon. And he even invites him at Heartslabyul to have some tea time and maybe a pijama party... Mammon says that maybe later... Since now he wants to enjoy a bit the Mammon cave without Vil's training exercises.

Neige asks for Mammon to make a selfie with them in memory of this day. Vil butts in and says that Mammon and Grim should first participate in the NRC tribe group photo.

So... Mammon makes both photos... He gets famous Unwillingly... Noice~

Now with that settled... Mammon wants to enjoy the quiet Ramshackle.

Except that he has a wierd Af convo with Mickey, then he searches for Grim and inevitably gets attacked by the apeshit Grim. So now, Mammon was dragging his way, all bloody... Towards Ramshackle.

Who's the one that finds him like this? If it ain't Adeuce themselves.

They immediately call for Trey... Cuz mama hen... And this gets to Riddle's ears too. So of course the news spread quickly.

Beel literally barges in with bandages and everything else once word got out to him too. Belphie was in tow with a pillow and a blanket.

The Grim search team is made out of dorm leaders, but Lucifer insisted to look for it too. Gotta punish the cat.

Ortho finds it and all that jig.

So, Mammon has to recover. Asmo got from Vil permission to stay and take care of Mammon. Levi did that too.

Mammon was in better condition after the festival ended and so, Vil summoned the NRC tribe at Ramshackle to talk about the VDC results. Mammon is overwhelmed when Vil offers his prize money to him along Rook, Jamil, Kalim and Epel. He insisted that Ace and Deuce need to keep theirs since, unlike the others, they actually strive for something that the prize can give to them. Asmo and Levi are going to share with the other brothers their prize.

Their happiness moment is destroyed when some wierd armoured people come in, destroying the Ramshackle. And they had Grim on top of that.

Mammon wanted to fight, but without his demon powers he had a huge disadvantage. Even though, he grabbed a wooden derbit that could be used as a weapon, and fought with it along the others. After all... He wasn't named the fallen warrior for nothing. He could be a fierce fighting machine when needed. But never once in his life, Mammon took away a life and his was going to stand by this oath until his very end.

Of course, the misterious dudes took Jamil and Vil. Asmo was with the other first years as Levi was keeping an eye on Mammon. It was a miracle that Ramshackle didn't crumble completely with all the damage.

Levi brought the first years along Asmo to the infirmary. Mammon insisted that he was alright, even if he was all dirty, bloody and clearly not in the right state to even stand on his own feet.

So Levi called the one who could force Mammon to rest: Belphegor. After all... Mammon needed a bit of sloth now.

Beel brought Belphegor along Jack to the infirmary. At this, Belphie forced the first years to sleep by his magic. The first one who woke up was Mammon, followed by Epel. Ace and Deuce were still asleep. When confronted by this, Belphie told them that his spell was only a small nudge to sleep... It isn't his doing anymore and not even Belphegor himself could tell when they will wake up.

Mammon is furios. The other brothers just arrive to the infirmary when Mammon literally pushes them aside, storming out of there. Epel follows after him as Levi requires for the others to come and help with treating the injuries. The infirmary was full and some students had to be carried to their dorms while others had to be brought in.

Epel convinces Mammon to cool down a bit and so, he proposes to go to poemfiore until Ramshackle is liveable again. Mammon accepts. Good timing, since Levi comes around, telling to the two that it was a chaos in the infirmary and they should check if in poemfiore are any students who need urgent treating.

So the 3 head towards the poemfiore mirror, when they crash into Rook. Levi asks why Rook has a broom with him. Rook replies quickly that he has to go after Vil. That, of course stirred a chain of chaotic events, including the broom chase. Levi was using his tail as to not fall off as Mammon was just screaming his lungs out along Epel, after Rook.

Meanwhile, Luci throws a gasket once he finds out that Mammon and Leviathan are missing. The others are worried too, of course.

And now... Back to our group. Epel, Levi and Mammon are interrogating Rook once they camp for a bit. You can imagine their surprise when Rook shows to them one of his many villas and also explains his UM. Like damn... Also the poemfiore uniform change. Except Levi... He has his Ignihyde one bc yep. He looks nice in it.

So they go after the Charon Rook hit with his UM. Once they reach to the ocean, Levi literally drops himself in the water. He's the Leviathan for a reason after all. Rook makes an ice little Isle to stay on when the Charons come.

And you know what? Levi draggs the Charons in the water, but he gets shot by teasers and thrown out of it. Without the territory advantage, Levi was easily put down. Mammon, surprisingly, was the last to drop.

This time, Mammon has again a vision, along more feathers. He starts to realise he's in those visions only as a phantom, bound to the said main character of the dream, which, by a wierd motive, it was one of the great sevens.

They get woken up and meet Idia! Who introduces them to the place where they are rn: STIX headquarters.

And... Because there is where the cannon stops... I'll stop in here for now... Until next updates...

Phew... This was long... Well... I guess that's it for now...

What do you think about it?

Maybe I shouldn't actually dive in almost clueless... But that's me... This is who I am... And I like to do it this way bc why not...

Wonder how much I got wrong and how much right... Really curious... So if one of you is in the Obey me Fandom... Sorry if I made any sort of mistakes, content wise, and remember... I just dive in headfirst with no idea of what is happening. I'm making up my own lore and yep... :/

Until next time! Bye!

#twisted wonderland #crossover #obey me #om x twst #Obey me! X twisted wonderland #So... It's a new au #Author is dumb bc diving in headfirst #But... This is who I am #I dive in headfirst #How should we actually name this?#Mammon the magicless student au?#Or Mammon as the twst protag #Gib me ideas in the comment section or asks

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ramblingsekai · 3 years ago

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I’ve always wondered something. How did like Kohane’s classmates react to Kohane’s glow up in the main story?

At first Kohane is the quiet, shy girl who most likely hid behind her hair and glasses and only talked to Minori and maybe Shiho sometimes. It doesn’t seem like Kohane had a lot of friends at Miya (the school, I’m not typing that whole name), before the school trip event (on JP server). She also didn’t know anyone at Kamiyama before meeting An. So she was probably a lonely person too. At some point she starts seeming happier (after meeting An), sad for a little bit (the failed stage performance bc of Kotaro), and then one day, she just shows up looking completely different.

She cut her hair, she’s wearing contacts now, and she seems more confident and probably standing up straighter. In an area convo w/ Akito later on, he tries to get her to look up more while walking so that’s something that probably happens over time, as well as making more eye contact over time. So her classmates (not Minori and Shiho since she probably told them what’s been happening in her life), probably assume that she just had a makeover or something. I like to HC that she has her street clothes with her and once the school day ends, she changes in the bathroom and then goes to Weekend Garage or something afterwards. So ppl see her street clothes, and are like whoa didn’t expect that. Her street clothes are very Kohane-style, but if you don’t know her that well it’s probably still jarring.

Here’s the HC I really wanted to get to. One day, An decides to go visit Miya to surprise Kohane and pick her up/hang out after school, but then Toya asks her if he can tag along since Tsukasa asked him to deliver a message to Saki (and we know Tsukasa has left his phone behind before *cough*dollevent*cough*). Toya also just wants to say Hi to Saki since I like to think they are kinda childhood friends too. Akito just comes too bc him and Toya are a package deal lol.

So school is over at Miya, and everyone just sees these 3 Kamiyama students standing outside by the gate. Now according to the rules of anime, like these 3 are probably very shocking to see for the Miya girls. You’ve got the stoic and coolish guy in Toya, the stand-offish, bad boy energy from Akito, and the bright/stylish/cool girl energy from An. So these like 3 incredibly cool and/or intimidating people are standing together by the gate and ppl are just like why are they here, who are they here for? And then shy, but glow-ed up Kohane just runs over to them and starts chatting with them as if it were nothing. An probably just throws her arm over Kohane or hugs her or something touchy-feely lol. Things start clicking together. Maybe some ppl are concerned, is Kohane hanging out w/ a bad crowd/is she being bullied,etc?

And then bc of the commotion Leo/need and MMJ pop up too. Toya calls out to Saki to tell her Tsukasa’s message and she just bounces up to him to chat for a bit. And Toya is smiling a little and suddenly he’s not that cold looking. The rest of Leo/need chat with him too since they’re kinda curious about Tsukasa and Saki’s friend. Airi also comes over to say Hi to Akito since he’s Ena’s little bro and she wants to probably know how he’s doing/how’s Ena doing/what did she think of this shop/etc. and Akito just can’t brush her off so he indulges Airi (and is trying to speedrun the conversation since he is probably more aware of the crowd of girls watching all of them than Toya and An). Shizuku also probably asks some stuff too since she also became somewhat friends with Ena after the picnic event. The other half of MMJ, Haruka and Minori, are also chatting with An and Kohane. And we see An and Haruka bantering with each other which is also shocking to the population of Miya since Haruka is usually so polite.

Maybe Shizuku also wonders over to Saki and Toya’s convo since maybe she had heard about Toya from Tsukasa at some point (idk if Toya would have had the chance to talk to Shizuku but we’re here now) and they also sort of bond over Tsukasa’s weirdness.

At some point, the more socially conscious ppl like maybe Akito, Airi, Shiho, Honami, and/or Haruka realize they’re blocking the gate and either they decide to move somewhere else or disband for the day since they’re all probably busy with something.

(I’m so sorry Mafuyu but I couldn’t figure out how to make you interact with any of these ppl without the other 25 ji members there. Maybe Shizuku could have tried to convince her but it’s unlikely that it would work).

Now you maybe wondering why I made this scenario. Bc if Kohane can visit the Kamiyama school, then the Kamiyama students can visit Miya. And I want more interactions. So I pushed all of the characters I could think of together.

I swear I feel like I’m forgetting some ppl, but this is all my brain could churn out. Anyways, thoughts? Got something wrong? Let me know. Thanks for reading!

#project sekai #project sekai rambles #vivid bad squad #more more jump #leo/need #kohane azusawa #HA NO KEN AGAIN I'M ON A ROLL GUYS

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hexalene · 4 years ago

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how to truly annihilate data from your flash/external drives for both windows and mac from someone who also glazes over and zones out of those jargon-laden tech bro tutorials trying to maximize your desperation for ad revenue by breaking every single step into a separate article with more jargon and more links and more jargon and more li-

So there you are, hand CLENCHED around your brand new 32GB flash drive from the discount bin left over from the back to school blitz at Walmart. 32GB of POSSIBILITY.

Unfortunately, after a few months or years of packing the damn thing with weird shit, like, idk, furry porn and weird candid shots of Gritty, idk I’m not here to judge your life, you clear out the damn thing, empty....but not.

Those 32GB of possibility now struggle to accommodate a PITIFUL 800MB of deep investigative research into the origins of the Florida Skunk Ape. What has happened? How could your memory have been eaten away like this?

So it turns out your flash drive will hold on to as much of the data you put onto it even AFTER you’ve dragged the files to the recycle bin or the trash.

This sort of news can be a blessing or a curse. For the blessed, yes! If you’ve deleted something by accident, YOU HAVE A CHANCE TO GET IT BACK. But that’s not this tutorial.

If You Gargle Cock For The Google PC Master Race:

>Plug in the flashdrive >Go to “Start” >Go to “This PC” >Go to “Devices and Drives” >Right click your flash drive >Click “Format” >Careful now boys, it can get scary here: >Okay, so now you’ve got some spicy options. >In “Capacity” This should show approximately whatever the drive’s original capacity was, maybe a little less. Leave this alone. >We’ll come back to “File System“ ignore for now >Skip to “Allocation Unit Size” and make sure it’s on the default setting, whatever that is. >For “Volume Label” this is just the name of your drive. Call it whatever you want. It’s the thing you can rename whenever, so it literally doesn’t matter. >Now all that’s left is “File System” and “Quick Format”

File System For Basic Bitches:

>All memes aside, you can end up with a few or a lot of options. I’m sure there’s a proper answer for this, but the options you MOST LIKELY need to worry about are “NTFS” and “ExFAT”. If you’re needing more than that, that’s way out of my paygrade. > “NTFS” is your default, 100% safe for windows option. Can’t go wrong, especially if this drive has only ever been used with Windows. >HOWEVER: >If you need to switch between Windows and Mac for whatever reason, you’ll want to pick “ExFAT” >”ExFAT” is the option for compatibility across both systems.

Format Options Making Your Files Unrecoverable Even With The Patriot Act:

>I’m being funny, but this IS actually, kinda, for real, what you’re dealing with, so READ CAREFULLY. >The default is for “Quick Format” to be UNchecked >UNchecked will unleash holy nuclear hellfire upon your drive, burning away your sins and leaving only a pure, newborn flash drive behind. >THIS CAN TAKE LONGER THAN YOU THINK IT SHOULD. If you need this drive quickly, DO NOT CHOOSE THIS OPTION. >This will annihilate all the data on the drive. The data will be UNRECOVERABLE. >Now, memes about the CIA and weird furry shit aside, you may want to be cautious about using this. If this flash drive has ever stored anything important, like family photos or important paperwork, or anything you’d be turbo fucked to lose, MAKE SURE YOU HAVE BACKUPS.

>If you’re uncertain about going full nuclear hellfire, CHECK the “Quick Format” option. >This is faster, and leaves the data somewhat recoverable on your drive. How much or how little? No idea. That Basic Bitch comment up in file systems also applies to me.

>WITH THAT NONSENSE DECIDED: >Click “Start” and then “Yes” >Now you’re cookin’ with peanut oil. Fresh, beautiful, full of data and ready to ride.

If You’re a Slut For Steve Jobs’ Forbidden Fruit:

>Plug that drive in >Go to “Applications“ >Go to “Utilities” >Go to “Disk Utility” >In the column on the left, you should see your main drive, and under “External” should be whatever you call your flashdrive. >Click it to enter the SpiceZone >Now here we have a few interesting things to note >The main section breaks down all of the info about your drive, and actually lets you see the Invisible Memory Eater haunting your device. You’ll see what data is under “Used“ versus the drive’s actual capacity. That used shit is what we’ll be clearing out. >On the top of the window, you’ll see five options: >First Aid (worth talking about, so we will) >Partition (abandon all hope ye who click thee) >Erase (THE GOOD SHIT WE CARE ABOUT) >Restore (out of my paygrade) >Unmount (fancy eject key this is fine we just don’t need it now)

File Systems For Basic Bitches: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

>Click “Erase” >”Name” is whatever your drive is called. Call it whatever you want, it can change any time, no harm no foul. >”Format” is where it gets spicy > “Mac OS Extended (Journaled)” is your default, 100% safe option. Can’t go wrong, especially if this drive has only ever been used with Apple computers. >HOWEVER: >If you need to switch between Windows and Mac for whatever reason, you’ll want to pick “ExFAT” >”ExFAT” is the option for compatibility across both systems

Format Options So Tight It Meets The US Department Of Defense (DOD) 5220-22 M Standard For Fucking Over The CIA

>It sounds funny, but the title is literally an option you can pick, I’m not kidding >First off is “First Aid” >TECHNICALLY, this is not an erasure function. This is a basic system diagnostic tool that can be used on your main hard drive to find any errors or corrupted files. It can do the same for a flash drive, which in my experience often results in freeing up some of that precious precious data without the commitment of a full wipe. If you’re nervous about nuking the drive, this is a safe place to start. >If all you want is a quick and easy wipe of the drive, ignore “Security Options” and hit “Erase” >Now for the good shit: “Security Options” >Click this bad boy. The window that drops down will be a slider with four options. “Fastest -> Most Secure” The middle two don’t have names. >”Fastest” is the default option. This is the equivalent to Window’s “Quick Format” which clears your drive, but like, leaves a potential breadcrumb trail back to your embarrassing One-Direction-During-The-Purge fanfic, so be warned. The second and third options are escalations of erasure, each taking a little longer, since it’s re-writing the data more and more each time. >”Most Secure” is your CLEANSING NUCLEAR HELLFIRE option with the hilarious note about the DOD. >THIS CAN TAKE LONGER THAN YOU THINK IT SHOULD. If you need this drive quickly, DO NOT CHOOSE THIS OPTION. >This will annihilate all the data on the drive. The data will be UNRECOVERABLE. >Now, memes aside, you may want to be cautious about using this. If this flash drive has ever stored anything important, like family photos or important paperwork, or anything you’d be turbo fucked to lose, MAKE SURE YOU HAVE BACKUPS. >HAVE YOU CHOSEN? >Hit “OK” >Hit “Erase”

AND WE’RE DONE.

This last bit down here isn’t necessary for the tutorial, but I wanted to include it as a fun side trivia thing:

All this shit is the secret behind those cop shows recovering “““““deleted””””””” computer data. Remember how my joke example went from 32GB to 1GB despite the flash drive being “empty”? The Invisible Memory Eater is actually the drive’s previously held data, despite what efforts you may have put into deleting it. It’s still there, like a ghost.

This is my best understanding of what exactly is happening, and why some data is recoverable, and why some is not: Using a painting as a metaphor, let’s say this:

You have a blank white panel and you paint a picture of a cat.

Next, you take white paint and cover the cat up. The cat is still there, but now there’s no way to see it.

You paint a sunflower. And then you cover it in white paint. The cat and the sunflower are still there, and now your panel is pretty thick with paint.

You paint a house. And then you cover the panel in white paint. All three paintings are still there, and the panel is really bloated and heavy. You had two options.

1. It’s not as capable of being worked as it was previously, so you give the panel away. The next person gets the canvas and notices how thick the paint is. With an x-ray, they can see multiple paintings under the plain white layer. Now, with a special tool, they can carefully scrape off each layer of paint to see each image. The house shows up well enough, maybe a bit of a mess. The sunflower is more degraded, and the cat is unrecognizable. But now they have an idea of what the old paintings were. And that wasn’t your intention at all, that was private. But you can’t do anything about it now.

2. You decide to freshen up the panel. Maybe it won’t be as good as new, but you can work with that. You take the panel around back, and blast the damn thing with the power washer until all traces of the paint are gone. Maybe the board is a little worse for wear, not quite brand new, but the evidence of the old work is absolutely gone, forever. There’s no image left to access.

Now when you give the panel away, well, maybe someone could notice the wear and tear, maybe a hint of old paint in the nooks and crannies, but there will never be enough to bring the old paintings back to life. Or even know that there were more than one painting at all.

That’s simplifying, obviously, and doesn’t perfectly line up with the technical things that are happening, but I think it’s a decent metaphor. To line it back up to the cop show bits, they’ve basically got the x-ray and the special tools to get at the old data, and the tutorial above would be the power washer annihilating everything.

#tutorial #long post #i'll be real guys I'm posting this for me #and i'll probably be making more of them #because I have things I need to immortalize in my brain flesh and this is a good way to keep up with it #*shrug emoji?*#after i wrote the painting thing i came up with a better metaphor using tetris fml #hexaleneleadingtheblind

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quirklessidiot · 4 years ago

Text

aoba johsai’s sport’s journalist (h/c’s)

just crack+ fluff + platonic-ish relationship (gn!y/n) (w: language!) a/n: this has been bugging me for awhile now since i havent seen headcanons of this yet (if their are do send them on my ask box) and since im on a slump, i decided to write this down. this is completely fun, easy-going, and self-indulgent, really perfect for someone stuck on a slump ksks. idk if i should make some for the other schools but oh welp enjoy! happy 900 btw werkwerk uwu so weird to reach this when im not even very active.

Now let’s be honest here, it’s no surprise that the volleyball team of aoba johsai has their own sports journalist. Like, c’mon, they’re one of the best in the prefecture.

But let’s start with the basics here, shall we? Let’s start with you, how this all goes through, and how you got into this heaping pile of mess.

Yep, you.

There you were in high hopes to get into journalism for college so what better way was it than to apply for the school paper? It would definitely look good and pretty in those college applications *chef’s kiss* you’re a second year btw idk if that matters but yeah..

Much to your surprise no one was applying for the news section which was kind of sad since you wanted a buddy there.

but-but it turns out though everyone was applying for the sports section completely understandable, next to feature, it was the most exciting thing to write because there was going to be a special section and writer for the volleyball team.

You knew that volleyball was kind of a big thing around your school?? you just didn’t expect it to amass like that much people.

The editor in chief is obviously surprised, you were the first person on that day to come in there and actually apply for something else.

and guess where that led you to?

Yep, the sport’s section, specifically the volleyball team’s personal sports journalist. Your brain goes brrt brrt because you were not a sports writer at all and you were, ironically, scared of ball games.

VOLLEYBALL WAS COMPLETELY NEW TERRITORY FOR YOU.

Your editor in chief laughs it off and says, “you’ll do fine… its like news bUT SPORTS! IT’LL DEFINITELY LOOK GOOD IN YOUR APPLICATIONS!”

You’re not sure if you should be terrified or terrified?

It doesn’t help that on the first day when you enter the gym you look terribly constipated and panicking a lot because of all the stray balls being spiked and tossed around.

It also didn’t help that you crash course the terminologies and the member’s name a night before and you were just running on iced coffee that day.

Yeah, way to make a first impression, huh?

When you approach the coach, you’re not exactly sure what to say and you were this close to chickening out until you saw one of the players come up to you and ask if you were alright and if you wanted to talk to oikawa.

you’re loading for a second there.

and the poor guy who asks you if you were alright, starts looking actually worried because you weren’t responding at all.

“OH, oH IS THAT THE CAPTAIN?”

the guy literally looks very confused?? because what kind of rock were you living under that you didn’t know Oikawa???

so you go ahead and introduce yourself and say that your name was Y/N and you were the new sports journalist for the team.

“....soooo you write?”

“...”

at this point on, you’re also confused too

and idk man, first impressions do indeed last because you ended up (unknowingly) sharing the same brain cell with Matsukawa Issei.

you both were just confused there, straight up looking like two kids who got left behind by their mom in the grocery check-out line.

anyways...

He tells you the team’s pretty chill and you should stop looking like they spiked a ball on your puppy or something.

Basically introduces you to the whole team after,

no questions asked, just go with the flow.

You basically just click and vibe???

Not only because you crash coursed and related to whatever they said,

you literally all shared the same brain cell together.

Kentaro was another story though, kid basically hated your guts at first, it felt like if you were to say one sentence to him that day, he’d literally spike a ball at your direction.

“we’re basically the same year tho :(” -Y/N

“lmao well do i’ve got news for you, y/n-chan.” - Oikawa and basically everyone on the team.

you gradually start to understand the coolness of the sport since you had to incorporate visiting them once or twice a week during practice.

but suddenly it becomes almost a daily routine after a month because they’re just really friendly people??

like wow, they’re all friendly giants.

You’re literally just there to write about them but they’re really patient and kind, they even invite you to practice games so that you could practice out your skills in writing since you mentioned that you’ve never written for sports yet.

they even give you some added key terms that aren’t found in books and online.

you’re def closest to iwaizumi and matsukawa.

iwaizumi because he makes really funny fish jokes about oikawa (yes you arent supposed to be laughing but man theyre funny af, oikawa would usually call you and iwa corny because the jokes aren’t even that funny) and yes its canon that whenever iwaizumi sees an oikawa fish in textbooks, he starts laughing and joking about it.

no explanation needed why you ended up being close to matsukawa.

its obvious after that first meeting ya both would be besties.

same brain cell bros go brrt brrt.

incredibly!! supportive!! I CANNOT STRESS THAT ENOUGH

like when you release a new write up about them, Oikawa would usually go, “It’s such an honor to be apart of your first steps, can you sign this?”

dramatic but hella supportive, we stan the gr8 king

“oh, wow, i thought you said you didn’t write before? how come you sound like a professional already?” - Hanamaki

another dramatic best boi.

akira + kindaichi getting shy because they’ve never experienced this yet. So whenever you try to interview them about stats or something for a special issue, they usually end up a stuttering mess

“w-well, L/N-san...”

kentaro slowly warming up to you but still looks like he wants to spike a volleyball at your face 90% of the time but unlike before you’re used to his whole thing already.

“Move, extra.”

“You were great, by the way. That was a powerful spike!”

you may or may not be included in random ramen nights with the team

yes, oikawa buys you your own bowl of ramen

itadakimasu.

he doesn’t mind tho, he really loves how you write them.

so its sort of a thank you for giving the team justice when you write about them.

team says you’re technically part of the team so they make you your own jersey. Now when you watch your games people ask if you’re like the manager or smthng.

“ no :’) “

When they lost against shiratorizawa and karasuno, you were bawling too like you were apart of the team.

this pretty much cheered everyone up despite the loss because your crying face was apparently very funny and memable.

oh right, your article was passed on to the town’s newspaper

it was literally like 7 am on a saturday and your notifs went zoop.

they added you to their group chat and spammed you with pictures of the articles that you wrote.

“...wOW I CAN’T BELIEVE IT?? YOU GOT FRONT PAGE FOR SPORTS???” -Oikawa

“we didn’t even win the tournament but we still get a feature?? thats so cool?? holy shit?? CONGRATS KSKSKS” -matsukawa

lmao idk matsukawa looks like a keyboard smasher tbh idk why

pretty much its normal for you to even start hanging out already outside of the court and after practice to get steam buns.

more chaotic mess and clumsy you running around.

your volleyball sports writing experience wouldn’t be complete until someone accidentally spikes a ball at the back of your head amaright?

ironically, it’s yahaba who does that to you. poor smoll bean.

“wow, you’re dumb.” -kentaro says to you

“ :’)” -you.

“y/N-SAN I SWEAR IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.” -yahaba

overall, you found yourself in a safe haven with the volleyball team and yes, you also cried when the third years graduated.

the third years have a picture with everyone on the team + you with a very red face from all the crying?? once again, you’ve proven yourself to be a meme.

continued to write for them up until graduation.

and its def obvious you kept in touch with all of them after, duh.

#haikyuu!!#haikyū!!#haikyuu imagines #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu aoba johsai #haikyuu scenarios #aoba johsai x reader #haikyu headcanons #haikyu scenarios

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lothioriien · 5 years ago

Text

richie tozier and his zoomer teen: headcanons

A/N: I tried keeping this as gender neutral as possible, but idk it’s a lil implied that the kid’s a girl. i’m trying to learn how to write gender neutral stuff :”)

By teenager, I mean around 16-17! High school age!!

Enjoy!

Sometime in the early 2000s, famous comedian Richard Tozier went to a party and came home with a woman.

oh yeah they deffo got it on that night

But that was a one night stand kind of thing, and Richie didn’t have any contact with her until about a year later.

He got up the couch one early evening to the ringing of his doorbell, and found a basket and a bag filled with baby food, diapers, and clothes perched on his doorstep

And in the basket? A small child, an apology note from the mother, and a birth certificate with his name listed as the father.

Oh boy did his life completely change after that.

It was him and the child, against the world.

but let’s skip the details on him struggling to take care of an infant first and move on a bit to when the kid’s older.

You, of course, are the baby that was left on his doorstep, and Richie tried to be the best father he could be despite his touring career as a comedian.

He’d bring you to the shows, even if you didn’t understand a thing that went on, though eventually when you’d help him write some material when you were older.

Constantly touring with him as a kid meant you were homeschooled. But that didn’t stop you from having a social life. You’d be friends with a lot of his fellow comedians, and John Mulaney was your ultimate favorite friend of his.

you just loved the very tall and gangly twelve year old looking man named uncle john.

Your academic life though was not too bad. You’re pretty intelligent, but when it came to maths, oh boy.

As a kid, you’d ask Richie constantly about math. He’d hate the school curriculum you had because math was different back when he was younger. He’d always help you, but it was mostly the internet just teaching you both.

You’d introduce him to vines (through iconic vine compilation videos), but mostly because he was so confused with this new language you were speaking.

Eventually he’d say some vines back to you and it’d come off so weird cause he’s a 40 year old white dad. You love him, nonetheless, and appreciate the effort

A lot of your instagram stories or snapchat stories are you filming him as you sing “You are my dad! You’re my dad! Boogie woogie woogie!”

He found it cute at first, where he would smile at you hiding behind your phone and hug you after cause dang he loves his kid so much and would die for you

then later, he’s evidently so annoyed because you do it constantly. As in he takes off his glasses, puts his head in his hands and just sighs so loudly.

When tiktok became the new vine, you were on the app every single day, making it a goal of yours to become tiktok famous.

You’d force your dad to do tiktoks with you

“I love my daddy. he is my superhero”

“Famous relative check!”

BUT THE PERFECT AUDIO

“Don’t look at me like that.” “YOU’RE MY DAD. BOOGIEWOOGIEWOOGIE!”

Gaining some clout because he is a pretty famous comedian 👀

Saying “ok boomer” to him when he’d annoy you

But then he’d clap back by being like “What the fuck Y/N. I was born in 1976, i’m not that old.”

“Yeah but sometimes you think like a boomer.”

“Ok, zoomer.”

“Dad. No. Get out.”

He’s really chill with you swearing. You definitely got that habit from him.

“What the actual fuck, Richard.”

“At least have the fucking decency to call me dad, Y/N.”

He got you into video games at a young age. Every time there was a new console or a new interesting game out, you’d both be up early to go out and get the said console/game.

And in each game you’d play, there would be hilarious commentary.

it’s basically that video with bill hader playing god of war with conan but imagine that and a zoomer’s feral energy combined.

He also got you into becoming a cinephile. Though unlike him, you read the books before watching the movie.

Marathoning a bunch of tv series together and you can never watch any new episode without him. Friday nights were reserved especially for it.

Richie can’t fucking cook for the life of him. Growing up, it was always take out, pizza, instant noodles, or mac and cheese.

He tried learning how to cook, he really did. But it was just so bad that eventually you’d learn how to do it. Then you’d try to teach him how too.

But did he get better as a cook?? Not really.

He once accidentaly set almost the whole kitchen on fire when he tried making pasta when you were 15.

“DAD, YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUT WATER IN THE POT FOR PASTA.”

“HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT? I JUST WANTED TO DO SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR YOU!”

“I APPRECIATE THE GESTURE BUT PLEASE DON’T EVER TRY TO COOK AGAIN.”

The following morning, he got up and learned how to make pancakes with sausages, bacon, and eggs.

It was damn good, and by far the best thing he ever made.

So his pancakes became a regular thing.

On casual dinner nights at home, he’d let you have a drink with him and be drinking buddies. He taught you how to drink and be safe with drinks (cause we stan a protective father amirite)

Speaking of protective father, he’d be so picky and open about the people you’d date

“Really Y/N? That person? They’re fucking trash and you know it. You deserve better, sweetie.”

“But dad. They’re hot.”

“That’s still a no from me, kiddo.”

Having the most random, yet somehow meaningful conversations with Richie, yet roasting him at the same time.

“Y/N, do you think I would be classified as a papi by people.”

“No. You still wear hawaiian shirts over a t-shirt. You’re too tacky for that. You’re a papa, not a papi.”

But somehow, you also adopt his fashion style?

Cause hawaiian shirts are pretty cool? Very John Deacon ala 80s aesthetic?

And then he roasts you back from the time you called him tacky.

“Respect the drip, Richard.”

Even though you always poke fun at each other, you guys are actually so open with each other and just talk about anything and everything.

Oh no when you first got your period, he was panicking and nearly bought the entire aisle of pads and tampons because he was so clueless

Meeting the Losers Club was exciting and nerve-wracking at the same time. You didn’t know what to expect of them or what they’d expect from you.

You clung to your dad the whole time, watching him reunite with his childhood friends. Each one of them had a look of surprise and confusion the moment they laid their eyes on you.

They found you to be like a mini-me of Richie, as both of you were clad in printed/hawaiian shirts and glasses.

“Jeez, Richie. Why’d you decide to bring a fucking clone of yourself?” asked Eddie.

“That’s my kid, you dumbass! Eddie, this is Y/N.”

“No shit, you have a kid! You got married, dipshit?”

“No, uh, it’s just them and me.”

You decided to butt in jokingly, “Joe was in the picture for a while too,”

“Joe? Who the fuck is Joe?” The minute Eddie asked this, Richie knew what was coming next.

“Joe mama.” Thus receving a high five from your father and a groan from Eddie.

at first, everyone else would not believe Richie ‘Trashmouth’ Tozier had his very own kid, but the minute you started to get comfortable and joke around, it really clicked for them.

“There’s no doubt they’re Richie’s kid. Look at them! They’re basically a carbon copy of him!” Eddie would have exclaimed.

You‘re very liberal and open-minded, supporting the LGBT+ community and such, but you didn’t really know Richie’s stance on it.

Perhaps it was because he’d been surpressing his feelings for a specific boy from his childhood for almost his entire life, and he didn’t really talk about that topic so much.

But when you saw the chemistry between your dad and Uncle Eds, you sensed a little something there on both ends.

always saying a specific vine under your breath when you see them “two bros, chilling in a hot tub, five feet apart cause they’re not gay” (thank you to for this hc)

OKAY UNCLE EDS LIVES IN THIS AND HE’S DEFFO A BIG PART OF YOUR LIFE AFTER ONE SPECIAL TRIP TO DERRY, MAINE.

You’d say the vine so much, Richie eventually heard it and pulled you aside.

“Y/N, I- how did you know?”

“Know what dad?”

It took a little while for him to come up with the proper words to say. How was he gonna break this to you?

“Y/N..honey, I’ve had feelings for your Uncle Eds ever since we were kids. I-i don’t know, it really scared me as a kid to feel that way so I never talked about it. I guess what I’m trying to say is, kiddo, I’m gay.”

“Huh? I thought you were American?”

the man was basically on the verge of tears. He was so tense, he almost forgot to breathe. But the moment you hugged him and told him that it’s okay, that you love him so much, and that you’re so proud of him, he wrapped you in the biggest bear hug and cried. You cried too.

A/N: Imma end it here for now :)

So sorry it took forever!! I hope you enjoyed!!

Let me know if you want a part 2! 🤪

#richie tozier #bill hader #richie tozier x zoomer reader #richie tozier headcanons #richie tozier x reader #bill hader imagine #finn wolfhard #it #it movie #it 2017 #it chapter two #richie tozier imagine #eddie kaspbrak #eddie kaspbrak imagine #reddie #reddie imagine #reddie headcanons #james ransone

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literaphobe · 4 years ago

Note

Why do u hate dating apps? Maybe u cdl find someone there that also wants to **** and gather more information for ur smut

i’ve only ever had tinder and okcupid, i deleted tinder after a day and okcupid after a few hours, here’s why:

honestly in hindsight i should’ve just tried to set the app to look for girls only. on tinder i only downloaded the app because my friend wanted to see what the app was like for girls (i guess u could say. he was my first ‘cr*sh’ 🤢 we are no longer friends and he has me blocked on IG i can tell u the story there if u want gjsjdjdjd it’s a Story) and i swiped right on some guys i thought looked not ugly??? fjdjdjdjdj or whatever but then i was getting so many matches and so many of them were messaging me and i just realized i had no intention of answering. the guilt was killing me so i deleted the app. one of the guys that messaged me was from my SCHOOL and he called me “tinderella” like bro no 😭😭

okcupid i managed to get girls as options. BUT the app showed me STRAIGHT GIRLS and i was so shocked thinking wow that’s so many wlw :) but i was wrong. they were het mostly and i had to unlike all the straight girls in embarrassment. anyway i went to look for some wlw and liked some of them but men WAY too fucking fast as usual. i should not have clicked like on any men. a bunch of them messaged me again and i decided to text some of them back for fun. this was like late at night and i think i was texting two dudes. one of them was normal enough but the other dude was batshit crazy. he told me he really liked me because i was the ‘nerd type’ (for wearing GLASSES????? IN MY PICTURES???) and that all the other girls on the app looked like whores :-) and i was like hey maybe don’t say that about them there’s nothing wrong with the way any of them are but then he wouldn’t budge and he moved on to talk about cats. so i was like oh well might as well see some cat pics while i’m here. but then he suddenly was like. i like you a lot and i want to date you can we meet tomorrow? and i was like UH I AM NOT FREE TOMORROW which. is a normal thing to say! that’s very last minute and i said it in a very chill aw dang :/ way. and then he had a meltdown he was like i KNEW IT girls are ALWAYS LIKE THIS TO ME and blah blah blah i didn’t wanna hear it so i blocked him and the other guy (yeah apparently the okcupid chat function sucks so we were talking on telegram) and then he had a meltdown in the okcupid chat too about me blocking him on telegram so i just deleted the whole app fkdkdjdj

also i guess i just feel like dating apps aren’t my preferred way to meet a person? like the WHOLE situation is essentially an interview to decide whether u find each other datable. perhaps some people are fine with that and you can probably find a really fulfilling relationship through these apps which some of my friends have found!! but idk i guess i’m not like that. or maybe i’m too scared to get my heart broke so i’d rather not seek it out in the first place

#ask #are there apps that are specifically about hooking up and not dating #KFKDKDKDKDKDJKFF #me texting girls like: hey do you watch she ra? yes? ok what time u free to fuck #gkdkfjdjfnndfnnfnfjfjdjddjjddjjdjd #IDKKKKK #i’m so scared :(#the idea of no strings attached sex beginning to sound appealing i guess #but knowing my coward ass i won’t do it

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toshisae · 5 years ago

Text

call me baby

summary: in which chenle gives you the entire world in exchange for some love

genre: crack, fluff and another pinch of angst

theme: ceo!chenle (sugardaddy au but without the sexy shit its just he buys you things in exchange for you loving him ok? ok)

word count: 2.8k

author’s note: HIIIII ITS BEEN A LONG ASS TIME SINCE I WROTE SOMETHING SO HERES THIS also theres no sexy time unless the sexy time u want is going on an endless shopping spree then this fic is for u!! its just another crack idea i had lol and this is just to get rid of writers block or smth despite having this in my drafts for the longest time

–

you know how people say not to chat with random strangers from the internet?

because it’s terrifying and shit??

well you never listened

here you are on a friday night on your phone

looking for some 40 year olds to troll

on this sugar daddy app you randomly found one day

not like you needed money or whatever

you lived with your brother jaemin who’s a doctor

so i guess you could say u’re: $$$$

and it’s just that you have nothing to do

what’t the worst that could happen right?

ding!

your phone vibrates in your hand

it looks like you’ve matched with your designated sugar daddy

“congratulations! you’ve matched with 6chittaphon9”

you looked at his profile and saw that he’s a 23 year old dancer

not up for it, you swiped left

“give me the good shit bro” - you tell the phone

you clicked the globe icon on the bottom of the screen

it switched you to a radar where it scans for possible sugardaddies who use the app

a little later your phone dings again

“congratulations! you’ve matched with zhong$”

and when you clicked on his profile,,

you let out a big big gasp

he’s a 18 year old ..

looking for.. sugar babies??

if you were drinking something then you would’ve spat out that liquid real quick

you swiped to the right and sent this dude a message

“hi”

ok so chenle right

chenle is the youngest billionaire in the world

bye kylie jenner oof

after his father’s passing, his company, zhongs inc. was in his hands

his father’s last wish was to have chenle get married at a young age

but chenle obviously didn’t like that idea

he wanted to experience a normal teenage life where he parties, drinks, date some random girls or whatever a pesky teenager does

so he found himself downloading a sugarbaby app

also just for the lolz like c’mon this is chenle the king of clownery

the c in chenle means clownery wbk

he had the money, the looks, almost anything you need for a man

so he quickly made his account

and not a minute later he already matched with someone named ‘<y/n3’

he sees that this y/n person already sent him a message

so obviously he replies

“hello”

you: asl?

chenle: 17 / m / seoul; u?

you: same except im a female

chenle: well ain’t that obvious

on the outside you bursted out laughing

you: ok capt. crunch so would you like telling me your name or is it confidential

chenle: i mean, i guess its kinda confidential but the company wont know anyway but im zhong chenle

you: ????? are u important or sumn

chenle couldn’t believe his eyes

chenle: um.. im ZHONG chenle

you: whats so special with your name

chenle was actually quite glad you dont know about his name or his background

chenle: nothing so wyd

it didn’t take awhile for you two to get along

since you two had the same type of humor and age

you: why are you on this app tho if you are “young and rich”

chenle: i could ask you the same question

you: its friday my dude and im bored

chenle: well,,,,,,,,,,, idk my friend recommended it to me

you: you’re friends with a bunch of old people?

chenle: nO I MEAN YES?? I MEAN NO

you: ... are u fucking with me

chenle: no i’m not fucking with you, im talking to u :D

in the end chenle asks you if it was okay that he’ll send you some money for fun

chenle: yk this app is about sugardaddies looking for sugarbabies right so lets make the most of it and give me your paypal or venmo and ill send you some cash for talking to me <3

you: wtf chenle no its fine!!! i had lots of fun talking to you and this app is just a whole ass joke but im glad i met a new friend here but its okay dont send me some money !!!!!

chenle: nooo think of it like i’m treating you out for some dinner so please allow me

you: still ! i wont let you,, till i get to see you so i know youre not some 40 year old i still think you are

chenle: how many times do i have to tell you im really 18 years old ffs but sure, when are you free?

on the inside youre just like: ASJDHJHDUIADHASJKDAHAHD WHAT THE FUCK

you: uhh i have school so i’m always busy hehehe

chenle: then i’ll see you in your school, what school do you go to?

this kid doesnt know when to give up

you: hhhhhhh i guess then i’m free tomorrow

chenle: GREAT! I’LL SEE YOU ON HONGDAE here’s my number boo

and there you have it

your first unofficial meet up with zhong chenle himself

you were too much in thought about meeting him you didnt even notice jaemin standing there with pizza in his hands

“what are you staring at sis?” - jaems

“uh nothing” you snatched the pizza from his hands

fast forward to tomorrow

you were getting nervous to meet chenle

“hey where are you going?” jaemin takes a peek of you in your room

can he stop scaring you like that

“going out” - u

“going where?” - jaems

“hongdae”

“cuteee do you have a date today?” he wiggles his eyebrows at you

“no-”

“are you going out with that pizza delivery boy?!” jaemin suddenly gushes

“jeno?” you ask him

“yeah that one” - jaemin

“no, i’m just gonna go shopping” you brush him off

jaemin shrugs and gives you some pocket money to spend

“be safe and have fun” he closes the door of your room

after safely arriving in hongdae, you sat somewhere thats not that crowded

who knows if this chenle person is famous right

so there you were waiting for him to text you or something

and just like that, your phone rings

it was an unknown number

but you answer anyway

“hello this is chenle, may i ask if you are in gongcha right now?”

you looked around the people who’s passing by hoping to see someone fancy looking holding their phones

suddenly someone stops right in front of you

“found you”

with that, chenle hangs up and sits across the table from you

“hi, i’m chenle” he gives his hand out for you to shake

and man, you were shookt

he looks like an ordinary teenager

or a hypebeast for this occasion

“o-oh .. h-hello” you bow

chenle suddenly laughs at your reaction

his laugh is beautiful

“don’t be nervous baby, i mean no harm” he smiles

his smile that totally made your heart melt

“how could i not? you’re the youngest billionaire out here” you gushed

chenle shushes you after the billionaire part

“sorry about that, it’s just i don’t like it when people tell me that” he tells you casually

ok humble king

“have you ordered yet? if not let’s order right now, on me” he grabs his wallet from his pocket and heads inside gongcha

after taking your orders, you two sat outside again with your drinks

“so y/n.. tell me about yourself” chenle takes a sip of his drink

“well, like i told you last night, i’m a student in college and i live with my brother who’s a doctor and that’s about it.. what about you, mr. zhong” you giggled

“first of all, don’t call me mr. zhong. you can call me lele instead and i love music and i like to play the piano and sometimes i sing” he shares, showing off his pearly whites

and after some many more conversations with him, he finally asks you an important question

“ok last question” he laughs, “i know it’s kinda weird but i really like your company and i know we met through a sugar daddy/sugar baby app but would you like.. stay with me..?” he asks cautiously

you stared at him with wide eyes

“i’ll pay for everything you want.. just,, stay or keep me company..?”

you kept quiet, just in shock on what just happened

“it’s okay if you don’t want to, just forget that i asked” he laughs awkwardly

“no it’s okay, i’ll keep you company but please please don’t pay for everything. i can pay for myself” you tell him

“why not? i got money, i can spoil you with gifts” he looks at you confused

“if you can’t remember, i’ve got a brother who’s a doctor and i guess we’re loaded too you know” you roll your eyes at him

“pfft okay then so.. where were we”

and with that you guys carry on your conversation

months has passed and you’ve been with chenle through everything

every time something happened in his company, you were there comforting him or just keeping him sane through out everything

and within those months, you’ve seen different sides of him as well

like the serious side of him– when he’s in business meeting and you’re his plus one

aside from his secretary of course

the funny side of him– when he’s cracking jokes to literally everyone

sometimes he takes days off in the midst of his own company just to pull pranks on his secretary, renjun

and of course, his vulnerable side– when he feels he can’t do what his father left him, the family legacy

there were night where you had to stay over at his place just to make him calm down or just to make sure he’s sleeping or eating well

and tonight was those vulnerable nights of chenle

here you were in his room, on the floor holding his hand as he rants about how his day turned to shit

“it’s just so.. hard you know?” he opens up, “when everyone expects you to follow a certain life but i’m not all about that business shit life! i want to sing or fucking play the piano or do some teenager shit not this paper work life!” his voice cracks at the end of his sentence

“ah shit i’m crying in front of you again” he laughs, wiping the tears

you don’t say anything but held his hand tighter

“thanks y/n.. you’re the best” he smiles down at you

“anything for you, chenle. that’s why i’m here for you right? to keep you company” you smile back

“can you.. come up here with me” chenle motions for you to sit beside him on the bed

you agree and climbed up

chenle sits up awkwardly, staring at you.

“woah this is the first time i had a girl on my bed” he giggles

“then i’m honoured” you laugh

suddenly your phone vibrates multiple times

you take a look and its your brother looking for you

“who is it?” chenle asks

“it’s my brother, he said i should go home” you slowly push yourself from his comfy bed

“no, it’s late. i’ll take you home first thing in the morning”

“i don’t want to be a burden to you lele” you say shyly

“you’re never a burden to me y/n” chenle smiles again

that night, you slept in his very arms for the first time

you wake up earlier that him and decided to prepare breakfast for him

you set the eggs and bacon on the table with orange juice

you smiled at your efforts, hoping he’d like it

chenle woke up in distraught since you were no where in sight

he was in his pajama pants and he rushed downstairs to check if you were still there

and thankfully, you were

you were on the dining table, waiting for him with breakfast ready

“good morning” he grins, face looking brighter than ever

you smile back at him, “good morning to you too, sleepyhead. help yourself with some breakfast”

chenle takes a seat and sips on the orange juice next to him, “did you make this?” he asks

you nod, “for you”

you could’ve swore you saw him blush for a moment there

and with that, you two ate in peace, just enjoying each other’s company

a few days later

you couldn’t make it to chenle’s office since you had classes and it was exam week

chenle was obviously very lonely that week

even his own secretary checked up on him cause he was awfully quiet ever since you came into his life

“so how are you and y/n huh” renjun casually asks chenle who was busy reading papers on the table

“we’re doing great” chenle replies nonchalantly

“are you two going steady now?”

that question made chenle halt to a stop on what he was doing

renjun notices that chenle turned quiet

“i never asked her to be official” chenle gasps, scaring renjun in the process

“wha-”

“renjun hyung can you get me the biggest bouquet bundle you can find” chenle rushes

renjun nods and grabs his ipad, looking for what chenle requested

“fuck.. what did y/n wanted again” chenle asks himself, trying to remember the bag or things you told him about

“call jisung and tell him we’re going to the mall” chenle tells renjun yet again, rushing to the elevator so he could go to the mall with his best buddy

“so what are we buying your special someone again?” jisung asks chenle who was busy pacing around the mall

“y/n said she wanted a bag but i cant remember what was it” chenle tells jisung who just looks as lost as he was

chenle ended up going to every luxury store they had in the mall

like louis vitton, gucci, prada, balenciaga, fendi

you name it he went there and bought one bag each

he even went to some make up stores thanks to jisung’s suggestion

surprisingly he had a girlfriend who was a makeup artist and puts make up on jisung’s face when they have nothing to do

and of course, chenle followed what his best friend suggested

now they were on their way back to your place cause you just texted chenle that you were almost done with your exam

chenle and jisung unload his car and went straight up to your apartment that you shared with your brother

and your brother answers the door

“uh chenle? what are you doing here?” jaemin answers the door

chenle stood there in shock once again, “jaemin hyung? you’re y/n’s brother?” he stares at jaemin confused.

jaemin nods slowly before realization hits him, “you’re the person y/n is seeing?!”

chenle nods uncertainly, slightly offended you never told jaemin about him but quickly shrugs it off.

“well surprise! now can you help us with this? i’m asking y/n to be my girlfriend when she arrives home”

jaemin immediately steps in and helps the two boys

after an hour or so, everything is now set into place

now they were just waiting for you to arrive

chenle stood there with his usual work attire which was a formal suit, holding a big ass bouquet and the paper bags right behind him

“jisung how do i look?!” chenle looks at jisung who was showing him two thumbs up

“dashing bro, she’ll say yes in no time”

and as if on cue, you walked in

and to say you were shocked to see chenle standing there

“lele! what are you doing here?” you covered your mouth in shock as you saw the never ending line of paper bags right behind him and the bouquet he was holding

“i’m here to ask you to be mine” he replies, staring at you once again

“does my brother know you’re here?” you look around your living room and you spot jaemin in the kitchen, watching the entire thing go down

“yeah. why didn’t you tell me he was your brother” chenle pouts, but shakes his head as he hands you the bouquet

chenle clears his throat once again, “na y/n.. would you be my first and last girlfriend?” he closes his eyes tight, waiting for your response

“i would be honoured” you take the bouquet off his hands and jumped into his arms

“about time you asked her” jisung comments in the background

“baby look, i got you some gifts!” chenle puts you down and shows you the abundant amount of things he got you

you smacked him in the chest, “what did i say about you giving me expensive gifts!”

“let me spoil you, please? you showed me how loving someone wholeheartedly is priceless, and i want to return the favor in my own way” chenle shows you his infamous puppy eyes.

“lele you’re making me cry!” you tear up, hidng your face in his neck

“also because i can’t remember the thing you told me you wanted a few days ago so i had to compromise” chenle giggles

you were happy

and he was happy

who knew an app could bring you two together and end up like this

the end!

269 notes · View notes

plasmavamp · 5 years ago

Note

bro idk if you're posting bb anymore but morgyn

i’m always posting the bb uwu ~

Full name: Morgyn Alistair Ember

Height: 5′11″ / 180 CM

Sexual orientation: Pansexual

Where are they from: Glimmerbrook, born in Windenburg

Occupation: Sage of the Untamed (in-game, level 10 Scientist lmfao)

Bad habits: Chewing on their nails/hands/wands/writing utensils/etc

Insecurities: Themself, mostly, but they’ve learned to overcome the insecurities of themself over the years; however, they still get really bad anxiety over things that it takes Morgyn a good while to get over

What makes them proud of themselves: What all they’ve done in the ~226 years (and counting) of being alive! Despite going through hardships, hell and back, pain and various waves of depression, Morgyn fought and became the person they always wanted to be and had achieved so much in so little time. In the end, they have everything they could ask for and the list isn’t very big to begin with ^^

How would they describe themselves: Even Morgyn agrees that they are a Hot MessTM and it’s become—what this generation calls it—a meme at this point hehe. Morgyn openly calls themself a disaster and just rolls with it.

Hobbies: Reading, working on spells and alchemy, practicing magic (literally or for fun), drinking tea outside while enjoying the weather, storm chasing, doodling when they feel like it, sleeping, eating, etc

Dream vacation: Moregyn never really considered a true vacation since they are always busying themself, but they wouldn’t mind taking a trip to somewhere exotic and a bit chaotic to really feel the energy of the area around them! But a cozy quiet vacation isn’t a bad idea, either.

Favorite animal: Cats. But they love all animals ♥

Favorite music: Morgyn doesn’t really have a favorite genre of music! They pretty much enjoy anything that sounds good to them; they’ve lived through two centuries and have experienced many genres and styles to not really have a favorite.

Guilty pleasure: They love setting random stuff on fire (in a safe environment), but there’s just something fascinating to use their pyrokinesis and watch something burn. They’ve learned that their favorite flame is blue.

Pet peeve: Being interrupted. They have a good few minimal pet peeves but they cannot stand being talked over and interrupted. They don’t care what the topic is (pray for the other people if it’s a heated argument) but Morgyn will stop the tracks and go off to them. Once Morgyn goes off, though, usually it’s the Cue for someone (usually Simeon or in some cases Eralen) drags them away before they start spitting flames (literally)

Favorite subject at school: They didn’t attend regular schooling while growing up in the Realm, but they love anything science and herbalism. Besides learning untamed and dark magic, Morgyn would always study books about plants and gems and various alchemy tomes if they aren’t hard at work at the cauldron.

Anything strange about them: Morgyn gives off an almost suave, cool, and collected aura, but in reality they are the equivalent to a child on a sugar-high. They hold a bit of intimidation in their general expression, so many mages and spellcasters (and anyone in general) usually steer clear of them and L. Faba, but once they meet Morgyn and realize they’re just an immortal 21-year-old with ADHD and a knack for chaotic magic, the person is either humored or terrified of the red-headed Sage.

Best friend: Even though Caleb Vatore is, and was, their best friend from the early years of being young teenagers...Eralen Nalvai [ @morgynnember ] is Morgyn’s best friend. She was their first personal apprentice as a Sage, and the two clicked and became close friends. She was always there for them, and they were always there for her. Another good friend of Morgyn’s is a friendly ghost, Blair Thorpe [ @mavesathesimblr ] , whom they met while figuring out Necromancy !!

Partner(s): Caleb Vatore and Nasier Haunting; their vampire and werewolf boyfriends uwu ♥

One trait they like in others: If anyone is truly honest, Morgyn loves and appreciates all honesty and truthfulness in a person ^^

How would you describe their aesthetic: [casually links to their Pinterest board lmfao]

Random fact: They are related to a vampire c;

#morgyn ember #answered #friend tag #bloodborn spoilers?#kinda sorta

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springday-aus · 6 years ago

Text

Chef!AU with Jaehyun [Yoon Oh]

moodboard link

Group: NCT

Member: Jung Jaehyun

Genre: fluff, romance

Type: Bulletpoint AU

Word Count: 1.5k

Jaehyun is a chef, right?

but like this man out here is serving both food AND looks

……….…. but not really

seriously though, ask any customer of his and you can bet that they’ll all admit to staring at Jaehyun at least once while they were in his restaurant

but like who wouldn’t

don’t lie to yourself

tbh, his food is actually really good though so his visuals are just a bonus

anyways…….. moving on

he’s the main chef and co-owner (along with sous chef!Doyoung) of a traditional Korean restaurant

it really suits him because he loves Korean food--whether he’s eating it or making it

(refer to nct life kfood challenge)

cute backstory: he’s been cooking with his grandma since high school and when he enrolled into culinary school, he wanted to share her food by opening a restaurant based on her recipes

just imagine: freshman!Jaehyun in a cute little apron with a frying pan in his hands

he has a bad habit of not eating his own cooking—even though Jaehyun insists that it’s because he likes seeing other people enjoy his food so much

obviously he would taste-test but then the rest of it would just end up going to one of the nct members somehow lol

speaking of nct, they spend a lot of money at Jaehyun’s restaurant—90% of all of their meals are made by Jaehyun (the rest are made by Doyoung lmao)

the thing is though, nct get more than half off on their meals because groups of handsome boys drum up a lot of business

Johnny probably: “we’re basically unpaid models, where’s my compensation?”

Jaehyun: “do you wanna pay the full price?”

other than Doyoung, Jaehyun doesn’t let anyone near his kitchen

he let Mark try to fry eggs once and he died a little on the inside

Mark: “the egg is stuck”

Jaehyun: “and that’s what happens when you don’t oil the pan”

Donghyuk somewhere: “how are you still alive??”

Jaehyun tries to avoid shopping as much as possible because he always somehow ends up buying cooking utensils

he needed to buy some new pants and then came back with like three new pots

so how did you and this gorgeous specimen meet?

your friend actually recommended his restaurant to you

“I heard that the cook is hot and the food is good, why not go see?”

when y’all first stepped in, there was a homey atmosphere present, despite how crowded it was

the restaurant was decorated quite nicely—from the walls to the furniture

but the first thing you noticed was most definitely the smell

you were easily drawn to it—and, seeing the actual plates being served on the table, you couldn’t wait to actually try it

all the food was so beautifully plated with all of the colors popping out

each meal looked interesting in their own way

from the platting alone, you could tell the dude really knew what he was doing

but then when you took your first bite—wOW

each ingredient really complemented the other and it was proved through the taste

next thing you knew

it was gone and your plate was CLEAN

one meal there and you just kept coming back every other week

your wallet is crying but on the bright side your stomach is happy

and of course Jaehyun’s noticed how often you come in

you look so happy whenever you eat his food….. it’s….. cute...

at first, you came with other friends

but each eventually began to tease you about how frequently you went there

“you’re such a good partner, supporting your boyfriend’s business”

“sHUT IT”

you slowly started to go on your own and even getting take out when you couldn’t come in

out of (what Jaehyun calls) appreciation, he started to give you some additional side dishes

he’d put them in your bag and if you would come in, he’d personally serve them to you

you, at some point: “oh no, you don’t have to!!!”

Jaehyun: “it’s the least I can do for you coming in so often” **smiles in angel**

cue every customer glaring at you

server!Jisung: “bro, this isn’t how you get someone’s attention”

Jaehyun, trying to hide his red ears: “I…. I’m just thanking them….”

Doyoung: “keep telling yourself that”

this continued for a couple of months--you’ve even made some friends with the nct group

(you can bet that Doyoung and Kun nag more than your actual parents)

it wasn’t until three full months until either of you made a move

basically, you owed a friend a favor and now you were on a blind date……… at Jaehyun’s restaurant……………..

I mean, you come in with other people all the time

but……. this time you were neatly dressed rather than your casual wear

your hair and makeup was done too…….

and it wasn’t just Jaehyun that noticed, everyone who was working that night definitely knew you were dressed to impress

you were kind of nervous because it had been awhile when you were on a proper date

but after waiting for 30 minutes, you were just tired

eventually, your date did send a text to you, officially canceling—something about feeling sick and making it up to you later

so in the end, you ate by yourself—it’s not that you were super upset

it’s just that getting stood up isn’t the greatest feeling

Jaehyun, Doyoung and the rest of the staff didn’t know what exactly happened, but they all kind of figured it out

they served you, as normal, chatting in between to check if you were okay and, as the entree came out, Jaehyun came out to serve the additional side dishes

however, instead of just putting them down, he sat in the chair in front of you

“do you mind ... if I join you…?”

“uM…. no, I don’t mind…..”

there was a small silence before Jaehyun spoke up

“I’m sorry… about your date”

you sat up a bit straighter, avoiding eye contact and feeling slightly embarrassed about the situation, “it’s fine, it’s not like it was your fault”

“still,” he pauses, “they… missed out on a great date”

he makes eye contact with you with apparent blush coloring his cheeks you cleared your throat, “..... are you saying that because we’re in your restaurant?”

he laughs and you swear it is the most beautiful thing you’ve ever heard

“kind of, but there are more creative dates than just dinner”

“... like what?”

he simply grins at you, “if you gave me some time, I could show you”

ugh, and his smile is even prettier up close

luckily for you, he was thinking just the same

after that, you two just…. clicked

and he did fulfill his promise to you—for your first date, y’all went for a little drive out and had a picnic under the stars, talking about everything and anything

y’all also go on dinner dates, but like, it’s an adventure because they’re all restaurants neither of y’all have been to

(awhile back, you two went out for Ukranian food and you found out how much Jaehyun can really eat)

obviously, you have more than just food dates, but…. what did you expect from a chef?

Doyoung: “how much money do you two spend on dates?”

you: “... let’s not talk about that rn…”

speaking of money, you don’t have to pay for Jaehyun’s meals anymore

in fact, he makes food for you nearly everyday lmao

Jaehyun: “just think of it as your boyfriend making you lunch” ^^

he’s just making sure you’re well-fed, healthy and happy

anYwAYS

other than a lot of food, you also get a lot of forehead kisses—idk why but he pins me as a forehead kiss kind of a dude

even when you get pass that shy honeymoon phase, he’d probably still do it often as a goodbye or something

omg, when he gets more comfortable, he definitely will find any and all opportunities to backhug or cuddle you

he’s just a soft man in love and, when he looks at you, he just melts and when you compliment him, he suddenly doesn’t know what words are

“you’re literally so handsome what the hell”

“.. stOP...” (he doesn’t want you to stop)

don’t be fooled by that face though, because he knows what he’s doing but he also doesn’t know what he’s doing

when y’all were at his place, it was just you two on the couch with a rom-com playing

next thing you knew, things escalated and those soft ass lips on your neck with his hands underneath your shirt

but, like not even two seconds later, his head is buried in your neck and he can’t make eye contact with you because he’s emBARASSED

basically dating chef!Jaehyun means lots of food and skinship—but also lots of support from both ends because y’all just really want the best for each other

Jaehyun: watching you eat with a smile on his face

you: “what?”

Jaehyun: “nothing, I just love you” (◠‿◠✿)

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kidchameleon92 · 6 years ago

Text

“life story” 1

i’m not going to edit this at all going along. typos, bad grammar, mistakes. doesn’t matter. this is spontaneous thought.

disclaimer: i changed the word to “spontaneous” from “spurious” which means something completely different, so the first paragraph is already a lie.

anyway, it’s been a really weird and sort of bad couple months for me. mostly in my state of mind. i feel very stuck and very immobile when it comes to my art and career. and that is having a very negative effect on my brain. even though i’m putting out my favorite songs i’ve ever written. i’ve been meaning to write for awhile. i used to post when i lived in los angeles several years ago, just journaling my day to day life. but i haven’t for awhile. i guess i also used to write in a notebook while on different tours. but i think i’ve since thrown that away or hidden it somewhere.

point is: i just want to write to get things off my mind. and hopefully, maybe, it’ll help you (if you care to) get to know me a little more and on a more personal level. even if we haven’t met. and maybe it’ll make what i make (if you care about it) mean more to you. either way, mostly, i just want to rant a bit. so, this is my life’s story. i guess.

chapter 1: kid

i was born in a suburb of the twin cities in minnesota. my parents both grew up in minnesota and lived there their whole lives (until my mom recently moved to tennessee). my mom was a mortician, and my dad was an accountant. also an alcoholic. he cheated on her and left her and i when i was one year old. i remember growing up going to stay with him on weekends, except it was with him and his girlfriend at the time. except he was drunk a lot. and would drive drunk with me (a baby) in the car. so, that’s cool. anyway, my mom was really depressed, and that was not a good time (or so i’ve heard, because i was a baby, so idk).

i stayed with my grandparents a lot, because my mom worked full time. my maternal grandparents lived on a ton of land. my grandpa and i would ride motorcycles and four wheelers and sleep in a treehouse and all that. my other grandparents lived in the same town but in a small house. i used to go up to their cabin during the summer and go fishing and swimming and boating and all that. different g-parent vibes, but loved both a lot.

anyway, when i was three, my mom married my step-dad. he is from india and has had a lot of unique and challenging experiences, so that certainly brought a lot of particular lessons and outlooks into my life. i went there once when i was about 14. it was wild. but so, yeah. that kinda solidified my family unit. my dad got remarried later on as well. but the older i got, i saw him less and less.

so ... i loved video games. i played them all the time. a big part of my childhood. mostly nintendo. explains a lot. as a kid in school (4 years public, 3 years private, 1 year home, 3 years private, 1 year PSEO [look it up]), i was never popular whatsoever. i always wanted to gain some sort of acclaim or attention from my classmates, but was pretty much always looked down on for one reason or another. i remember in elementary school, i was the kid who was literally terrified of storms. probably because i had been in a tornado when i was six. but the moment it would thunder, all the kids would look at me to see if i was gonna cry. usually, i did. and the school nurse would take me outside and we’d walk around as a sort of therapy. i guess it helped sorta. i still get nervous in storms. but i don’t cry.

i also remember a time specifically that i got made fun of for wearing a denver broncos t-shirt. this kid just railed on me because it wasn’t a minnesota vikings shirt. so, one: i don’t even give a fuck about sports. but two: it stuck with me for some reason that someone would be a massive jerk over a t-shirt of a sports team. i guess that’s just because we as humans are messed up things.

anyway, in middle school, i started becoming semi-interested in music. i listened to the radio every night, listening to the top 10 countdown of big songs from that week. kanye, weezer, the click five, black eyes peas, green day. those were some anyway. besides that, i was just listening to like kelly clarkson and relient k or something. my mom had a steven curtis chapman cd in her van i thought went hard. but i started getting into popular music around then. i also started to write my own music. i used to take piano lessons from when i was like six or seven until i was 14 or so. but after i started writing my own songs, i hated practicing assigned pieces. i didn’t care. i wanted to play my own. so, the teacher said if i quit, i couldn’t be her student again. so i did. that’s fine. she said i was her most talented student. but i didn’t work that hard. so, that goes to show that natural talent and hard work have different roles, i suppose.

chapter 2: girls and high school and such

in high school, i started LiKiNg gIrLs and stuff. i also was still not very popular. i also had started a band (with jack). i wasn’t very good, but i was just as obsessed with it as i am now. anyway, i liked this one girl from my church, and we talked all the time. but because we grew up in a pretty fundamental church culture, we weren’t allowed to date. which honestly, i fine, because looking back, no one knows what they are doing at 16 really. i definitely didn’t. i still don’t know what i’m doing. anyway ...

so, this girl and i half-dated for a couple years, and i was really clingy and annoying. but that’s just how i be. and i thought i was gonna marry her and stuff, because in a fundamental church context, you over spiritualize everything.

[[disclaimer: i am a christian, and i still go to church, but my theology and ideology on a lot of things has just evolved and changed a lot since i was young and since leaving the ultra-americanized/ultra-fundamental “christian” realm. main point being: we all are effed up bro and need saving. i’m an idiot always!]]

but now we’re back. girl “dumped” me and started dating another guy named “patrick” right after, even though she technically wasn’t allowed to date until she was 18. but apparently, she just wasn’t allowed to date me. so, that was cool. anyway, i was angsty, but then i got over it. because i was 17, so life big time goes on.

then i met another girl from canada while i was finishing school and going hard at my band stuff. we hit it off, and i started visiting her up there. and she visited me and all that. it was cool. and then all of a sudden, she really started hating me. and to be fair, i was weird and clingy and sort of a lot to deal with. but we kept dating. all the while, i was sort of leaving behind music to try to get into nursing school. yep, nursing school. but i got rejected, which is great. and so, i decided to go to audio engineering school in canada. and she was gonna go to college in the same city. this is great! so i thought. she dumped me (well, i sort of broke up with myself for her) about a month after we were living in the same city. wack. but it made me buckle down and work my ass off in school. i was top of my class one semester. yeah, i’m not that dumb. sometimes.

towards the spring of the next year, i happened to meet a girl who was at my church with one of my friends. she seemed chill. just talked a little. nothing crazy. happened to hit her up on twitter just to say hi. no intention. we talked a bit. nothing after that. then all of a sudden, a couple months later, i was tweeting about reading harry potter for the first time (note: fundamental upbringing). she happened to tweet me back about it. and long story short, we went out on a date. a sort-of-date. and what was supposed to be a lunch turned into an all day and half the night date. anyway, we got married a year later. after a lot of immigration paperwork and expenses. that’s a whole other post. that sucked. it’s a lot. and it’s why i feel bad for people who have nothing who are trying to come here to flee danger in their own countries. again, another post.

chapter 3: married, and other hard things

so, i forgot to say that before we got married, i lived in los angeles for a year after school. i was doing more sound for film work. on set stuff, post-production. got to do work with like ... james franco, matt damon, emma roberts, william shatner. some cool stuff. but jack’s old band came through on tour, and i saw two shows. and i was like ... bruh. i gotta do music, what am i doing? so, i literally moved back to minnesota within like two weeks, worked as a nursing assistant for a little bit and got married. then moved to nashville like two weeks later. i guess i could’ve stayed in los angeles. but nashville felt like the move at the time. everything happens with a purpose.

so, we moved here, and she couldn’t work for three months because of immigration stuff. so, i was like, well, guess i need a job. so, i got a job managing a home for a couple people with intellectual disabilities. it was super hard. mostly because the company was really, really bad. so, i got another job working as a staffing coordinator in an office for a home health care agency. that was a little better. still tough. but less overwhelming. a couple months after i got that job, i got an offer to go on a country tour playing bass for someone. and i was like ... well, this is why i moved here. so, i quit and went on tour. and shawna actually took my old job. interesting.

i was gone for three weeks, and it sucked and the pay was bad, but at least i was doing what i wanted. but then i got an offer from my friend to do some tech work on a much bigger country gig. i hadn’t done it before, but it was better pay and a better position. and on a bus and nice things and all that. so, i went for it. i pissed the other girl i was playing for off. but that’s show biz, baby. but like, i found a replacement for myself and paid to fly him out to her shows and stuff. so, really she won.

anyway, i toured with this other artist for four years. and i learned a lot. it was very, very challenging, both mentally and physically. and some people are just hard to work with. but i still gained so much valuable experience and insight into touring from that. i also started playing guitar for another artist who was small at the time, but has now had a couple number one hits. but his label fired me because i didn’t look country enough. we’re still homies though, so it’s literally fine. because i do indeed not look country enough.

at the same time, i was doing my own solo music and also producing and writing with and for other people. i’ve had the opportunity to write and produce for everything from independent artists to major label to billboard charting albums to whatever. songs on major television networks. i’m still very un-rich though, if that tells you anything.

but really, i just wanted to do my own music. and i literally couldn’t get it to go anywhere. i had no idea what the “secret” was. what was i missing? money? connection? power? actually probably all of that, to be honest. this industry is wacko. i was pretty close to giving up.

chapter 4: milkk

i read a satirical article on vice.com about “how to start a trendy band” or something. i thought it was funny. so, i called jack. he had just been kicked out of his old band for no reason. i was like, “bruh, let’s do this article.” and he was like, ok. so, we sort of did. and i’m not gonna go into all the early details, because i’ve done a million press interviews about how our band started. and i don’t wanna say it again. google it.

this was the first time that i actually saw people care about my music. it was a high. it was like a dream. and we hadn’t even had any big song or anything. just the fact that people were listening and engaging was mind blowing to me. but just like with anything, the more things went, the less i found satisfying. the more “likes” or “follows” on socials didn’t feel like enough anymore. the streams didn’t seem good enough. the chart positions on the debut album didn’t seem that great. the hype wore off a little after the debut album hype. and that made me insane. probably because we as humans are not built to be satisfied by the things in our life. “Vanity of vanities!” it’s in ecclesiastes. like the bible one.

chapter 5: now

anyway, that’s bad. i had (and have) let my mind convince me that i have to achieve something in order to be happy or fulfilled, when i know that that stuff will never fulfill me. i could play the biggest stadium and have the biggest song in history, but after a burst of dopamine and excitement, it would be empty. and i know that nothing here will do that. at least, that’s what i believe. my hope is outside of myself.

but that’s hard to internalize when you are so passionate about something, and have been for so long, and all you want to do is create things for other people that they can appreciate and be influenced by. but it’s probably also selfish. like i openly admit i like the idea of fame and presence. and it probably ties all the way back to wanting acknowledgement and attention as a kid, from being unpopular and ridiculed and, honestly, left by my dad. maybe i just therapied myself.

but regardless, i know i can’t put my identity in all this stuff. it’s hard, and it’s harder when you create stuff. because it’s so deeply tied to you. but it’s still not “who i am.” i know who i am and what i believe, but i’m still a mess, so i can’t enact that in my brain perfectly. in fact, far from it.

anyway. it’s late, and i’m going to post this and attempt to not worry about how it does on social media. stupid!!! i just want this out in the world for you to read. hopefully it’s helpful for you in some way. but mostly, it was just cool to write this out, for my own sake.

i’ve been blessed in some amazing ways. my family. oh, yeah i forgot that i have two kids. i love them a lot. i don’t talk about them on social media much. but they are very special to me. and we’ve always been taken care of, even when times were tight or i didn’t know when the next paycheck was coming in or i thought my wife was about to die or whatever. the Lord provided for us every time. and i am grateful to have what career i have. it may be “small” and nothing to look at by the big industry standards, but i believe in what i make so much, and i’m just grateful that anyone cares about it at all. and i will continue to do so until the day i die. because i have to.

it’s what i was born to do, for better or worse. and no one can tell me otherwise.

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tempestuous-cosplay · 5 years ago

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Flower Asks

Alisons: Sexuality?

Demi-romantic poly-pansexual.

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

They Them non-binary

Amaryllis: Birthday?

July 20!!!!! Gunna be 25

Anemone: Favorite flower?

Can’t choose. But its something blue, purple, or red. I really like Hydrangeas and Narcissus flowers.

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

Brooklyn 99, Avatar the Last Airbender, MeatEater

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

Depends on whats needed.

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

ah, man, i don’t fuckin know. Probably the line “Change IS nature, dad, the part we can influence. And it all starts when we decide.” from ratatouille

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

Water, milk, then sprite. Unless we talkin booze, tequilla.

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

ABSOLUTELY

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

Yup. Would love to have that again one day, but not now.

Baneberries: Favorite song?

Under My Skin by Jukebox the Ghost at the moment, but consistantly its Pierre by Rynn Weaver.

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

Better than some but has its issues.

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

I have 5 closest friends whom i LOVE and talk to with any regularity.

Begonia: Favorite color?

PURPLE

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

DRAGON

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

I like being awake in the morning bc then it feels like i have so much time to do stuff, but my sleep schedule always shifts to being a night owl.

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

a Kite or a hawk for all that fancy flying.

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

A veterinarian, a puppeteer, or the next david attenborough.

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

I eventually want ONE, just one, of my own when I’m living with a community who will help me raise them. But really, i think too many people are having children who just should not be parents.

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

Being in love again bc the last times its happened I got traumatized.

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

I always used to say i would never get tattoos and now i have one and plans for more. Ain’t gunna stop till im covered.

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?

I would travel up to my friend @b-oredzoi and spent the day with her. She ain’t got a choice.

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

Single but with some FWB situations goin on.

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

anywhere outside continental US. Im not picky. Top choices Kyoto Japan, the french countryside, p much anywhere in africa.

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

when im tripping on acid or when my friends are hugging me real tight.

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?

YEAH, got one on my thigh.

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?

YUP, lobes and one cartilage

California Poppy: Height?

5′4 and hating every second of it. Wish i was taller.

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

100%

Carnation: What are you currently wearing?

skill boxers stolen from an ex-friend and a shirt that im not 100% sure is mine??? but I’ve had it for a year and wear it all the time soooooooooooo. Mine now

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

I used to sleep with the closet light on until i was, like..... 14? 15?

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?

myyyyy mom prolly.

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

my pal Eli

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

something swoopy and pretty. Or the one thats just emojis.

Columbine: Are you tired?

always

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

getting top surgery and corona being over.

Coneflower: Dream job?

philanthropist actor/ director.

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

ambivert.

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

We did this with balsom fir. anyway, yes i have been!!

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

depending on who they are, as far as they needed me to. I don’t THINK i would kill anyone, but there are a few people i would willingly die for.

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

A green and purple dragon named Puff, who i still have. He’s always either in my bed or on a shelf in my room.

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

Cancer

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

Didn’t die. Helped stop my grans house from burning down.

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

so far its getting my associates degree. Either that or dragging myself out of a horrible depressive, self destructive spiral in 2018-2019, getting the help i needed, and doing better for myself and those around me.

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?

figure out why and wither resolve it or dump the partner.

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

my dad prolly.

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

Crafty stuff. and animal trivia.

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

organizing anything, remembering dates, statistics.

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

Got okayed for top surgery

got surprise money!

Got a sentimental piece of art from my grandparents (at long last.)

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

p solid. Helped my dad with some yard stuff, made a yummy dinner, saw most of the supplies i need for a new project shipped.

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

mmmmmmm not really, but im getting there.

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

Graduate, move out, get a good, fulfilling job. Travel some more.

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

The friends who stuck around

my plushie collection

my tarot collection

my print collections from cons

finally having a queen sized bed

books

my pets (wow, almost forgot about them)

my fursuit making skills

my hair

my gently rising self esteem

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?

petting soft things, reading, watching Ghibli movies.

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

all them love languages bro. Every single one. I tailor my affection to the individual and what love language they receive most. Mostly, I cook for people.

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

We’ve done this one too!

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

Its a nice balmy 72 degrees with a nice breeze. The sun is shinning with some clouds here and there. I go to the zoo with some friends/ a friend and we just share random facts about our favorite animals. we get some cute plushies at the gift shop and then go to a wonderful meal, either greek or korean bbq or Pho and we go back to someones house to watch movies and vibe, sleepy, warm, and content.

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?

read, craft, organize my room, draw, garden, swim.

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

I dont have a singular “Best friend”. I do have my Inner circle tho!

Laura- we met my freshman year of collage, first day and we click INSTANTLY. She’s my soulmate and I would go to hell and back for her (RIP to Orphius, but im different)

Bly- we met, like, back in 2014/2015 at house parties but didn’t really start getting SUPER close like we are now until, like, 2017/18/19 ish. Really the only person I actively talk to every single day, my mood twin. We share a braincell.

Syd- we met at, like, Momocon 2014? 2015?? something like that???? bc we roomed together. We started getting close in 2016 by bonding over fursuit stuff. My go to roadtrip partner. I kinda owe my current joy for life to her bc she helped me through my hell time in 2018 but kicking my ass and teaching me how to make fursuits.

Eli- we met at Dragon-Con through a mutual friend in 2014, but didn’t really get close until may of 2019. Now we’re p much partners in everything but title bc we just don’t have romantic feelings for eachother. We share a therapist and hang out at least 3 times a month.

Shane: We’ve been friends since, like, 2010 but started getting close in 2017 when they helped me get a job. Then we just,,, stuck around. They kick my ass to get out of the house and do stuff, or did before corona

Sammi : Friends since 2010 when we were in highschool together. Our friendship was super rocky until we were in different schools and smoothed out as we aged and matured. They are the reason i got into conventions and cosplay as a whole, so they have only themselves to blame for how I am now.

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

Eli and laura.

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

my inner circle is, like, 6 people, but friends as a whole like.... idk.... 20?

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

“Your gender vibe, is, like, primordial. Its a perfect blend of masculine, feminin and things that are just indescribable.”

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

I hate myself, to be perfectly honest. But Im trying my best to be a good person and a good friend, so I don’t have to like me, as long as the people who matter do.

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

I love my hair. Also how much better at communication i’ve gotten.

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?

my adhd and the social symptoms of that.

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

i liked swinging and listening to the sounds of shoes on carpet. Good stim time.

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

I never really had a best friend for more than 2 years. They would always move away, So i don’t really have a solid “best friend as a kid.” Why yes, I do have abandonment issues.

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

How my last relationship ended. I pulled some STUUUUUUUPID shit and never got to own up to it or hold the other person accountable for the harm they did to me. It was just overall horrible and never got any type of closure. Likely never will. But it be that way sometimes.

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?

My grandfather died last week and i feel........ almost nothing bc I honestly really did not like the man. He was horrible to me growing up and horrible to my mother while my grandmother was sick and dying. But he did a number of good things too. But I feel guilty for not mourning him more.

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

I chose Sawyer bc when I was younger, I was very good at wriggling my way out of work and my mom and aunts would call me “Tom Sawyer”. I also just like Mark Twain and the name Sawyer in general. Feels good

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

In the suberbs of atlanta in a nice house on the Chattahoochee river. I’m actually still living there while I finish school.

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

Rosey wall paper and gross maroon carpet until 7th grade, when we painted it all blue and put in blue carpet. It was, and is, very VERY blue. Im gunna be painting 2 walls different colors soon.

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?

Miserable, tbh. A lot of shit happened when i was 16 that left me with a lot of trauma and issues that I didn’t really have the maturity or energy to deal with while in highschool on top of being queer and dealing with that. So it was a lot of fighting with parents, self loathing, and struggling in school. It had its beautiful wonderful moments that I love with all my heart, but for the most part it was just kinda rough.

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

Georgia born and raised. She tries her best and is a wonderful mother, but we clashed a lot growing up bc she’s fairly neurotic and likes everything to be precise and orderly and perfect and im... ADHD so sometimes close enough is all you’re going to get. Growing up, i couldn’t communicate what was going on with me or happening in my head very well at all, and it caused a lot of tension.

Onions: Tell about your dad.

Hes from Bogota colombia and im almost a carbon copy of him. That means our issues with ADHD have a happen of blowing up at eachother. He’s horrible and constructive communication, but overall is sweet and funny and very very clever. My relationships with both of them are p okay nowadays with a few spats here and there that I will deal with when I don’t live with them anymore.

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

I never met my paternal grandparents. My maternal grandfather died when I was 6 and i hardly remember him.

My maternal step grandfather was.... not a good man but he was interesting and incredibly smart and fairly liberal. So there was that at least. But, to be honest, I hated the guy.

My maternal grandmother was one of my favorite humans in the world. She spent her whole life a highschool science teacher. She was funny, witty, elegant, a fairly talented cook who always encouraged me in everything I tried. Im still dealing with some emotional stuff regarding her passing, but Im just always so glad i got to spend as much time with her as I did.

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

haha shit. Maybe my 21? A bunch of friends and i went and hung out at a park then got hammered at my house after.

Peony: What was your first job?

Working at the summer camp i went to as a kid. Debating going back if I ever can.

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?

I want my future partner to be a friend where things just, grew and blossomed.

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

Emotional? I try to be constructive and communicative about who or what caused it and doing something productive to help deal with it.

Physical, i just ignore it until it goes away.

Pink: Where is home?

Wherever Im going to sleep that night.

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?

When my ex broke up with me, I would have cut all ties all together instead of try the whole “we can stay friends” bullshit. I would have just “I don’t hate you, but If we aren’t going to be together, I can’t be friends with you until I’ve had some time to heal.”

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

nope

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

I’ve made my fortune and when I say things people listen, but I can also run away to my beautiful little homestead with my queer friends and wife and all our animals and children living together in a wonder queer commune. I get to travel twice a year and i never have to worry about money.

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

hmmmm. No idea.

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

can’t pick one person.

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

wind chimes probably.

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

oh man, too many to choose. I’ve lived a wonderful life so far.

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

Too many to choose. THe night I got dumped, my grandmothers funeral, my friends funeral, some others that I don’t wanna talk about due to triggers. bleah

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?

I want..... soup dumplings.

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

Depends. really intense or personal feelings involving my depression or emotions is almost impossible to talk about. But my feeligns about films and stuff i have 0 issues talking about.

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

Laura

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

idk, like 7 hours?

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

School

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

im.... technically self employed/ unemployed. I want a job tho.

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

My killstar hoodie.

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.

Disaster gay.

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

A tarot deck

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

Corona virus. and money.

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

The entire Heros Of Olymus series The lightning thief and Sea of monsters The trials of Apollo The last unicorn.

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

ideally living with friends and one year away from graduation.

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

*sweats* yea

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

im a witch

#Just felt like it #long post #all about me

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that-was-anticlimactic · 6 years ago

Text

Ninjago The Good Place AU Headcanons:

Okay so after yesterday, I decided to write headcanons because I wanted to and it sounded like fun so since you guys helped me out / seemed interested… @cakeking-cole @aeonthedimensionalgirl @darcpython @gayvoidprince (I hope these are worth ysince I’m tagging people oof)

“The Good Place”

It has been designed by Wu, who is the architect

Everyone in the town aside from the four humans (five if you include Lloyd… still trying to figure him out…) are demons, or idk Cloud Kingdomists or something? Like the Master Writer is the Judge, you know? oo or what about The First Spinjitzu Master as the Judge??

On the topic of soulmates, yes everyone has a soulmate there, but, it’s more of a friendship soulmate thing and a you have your legit soulmate here too, you just have to… find them over time… you’ll know

I still haven’t decided legit soulmates… I can’t figure out what ships to use whoops... like... do I want to go Bruise or Glacier or Techno or Opposite or Lava or Plasma or jinxdybwgeycfkubgewlu

lol this section is short haha

Kai

Kai is Eleanor in the AU

He was not the best person. He was conceited, rude, he treated everyone poorly and he blamed a lot of it on the fact that his parents left him and his sister. He was not a good person. And that’s why he ended up in The Bad Place. He was even trashy to his sister and friends.

He died at a restaurant with his friends and sister. He had just been super rude to the waiter and then choked on their appetizer and died.

So, Kai, like Eleanor, was told he was in The Good Place and that he was remarkable. But, it was the wrong Kai Smith.

The Kai Smith he was supposed to be this incredible Rehabilitation therapist who worked with people who needed a lot of help. He volunteered and went on mission trips and donated all of his money to charities... you know all that good stuff to make the real Kai Smith feel so much less than.

Kai was platonically paired with Zane, who he didn’t always like since he was so serious.

He told Zane about him not belonging in The Good Place and ended up asking him for help and to teach him how to be a good person

He hates the lessons at first, like despises them. Kai is more of a go out and do person rather than sit and listen so it takes some time to get used to it and to absorb and enjoy it.

Kai honestly hated Cole for awhile, not going to lie. He thought that Cole was so stuck-up and was a real, well, in Good Place language, a bench.

He ended up meeting the real him though and they got along fine afterwards.

He disliked Jay for awhile too, but they ended up becoming real great bros.

The others help improve Kai by teaching him how to be kind and selfless and understanding and empathetic and how to stop living in the past.

Kai ended up figuring out that they were in The Bad Place.

He also ended up confessing to Wu about him not actually belonging there.

He also helped Jay get the courage to confess.

The first night there, Kai ended up doing some stupid things like stealing all of the shrimp and calling Cole and some others name and that provided for the chaos sequence the next morning.

Kai was always loyal, it was one of his few redeeming qualities, and through it all, once he befriends the ninja, he stays loyal to them and would protect them with his life.

He actually still runs the Balcksmith shop, but since he hates his parents for leaving him and Nya and is a bad blacksmith, he makes terrible weapons and sells them at a super high price.

Some torture methods for Kai include: making him feel less, making him feel like he doesn’t belong, putting him in situations where he does things he hates like swimming or a fancy dinner where he has to be the happy welcomer or something

Zane

Zane is Chidi.

Zane isn’t an indecisive ethics professor. He is a teacher, though. Zane teaches science like physics and chemistry and such.

He has a super good moral compass and cares about others a lot and does study some ethics in his spare time.

The problem with Zane, though, and the reason he ended up in The Bad Place is that he is way too serious! He takes life much too seriously and doesn’t ever have fun. He could go weeks without smiling or laughing or taking a break because he believes that life is too important and serious to be take lightly. He tries too hard to be this perfect human being.

His intensity and seriousness often drive people away from him because they don’t like being around him.

He actually died from a heart attack from worrying too much about trivial things and being too serious and such in the staff room at his school.

Like I mentioned, Zane is Kai’s platonic soulmate.

Zane was so excited to meet Kai and like... have a friend, and then he learned that Kai didn’t belong there and was like are you kidding me?

Because he didn’t want to be in this situation, but he didn’t want to not help

He ended up deciding to help, and did the best he could to teach Kai and eventually Cole and Jay about ethics.

he didn’t teach ethics in school, like I mentioned, but he knows enough about them and can do research and study and make a good course, and he knows how to teach since he was a teacher.

The others help Zane become a better person by teaching him how to loosen up and see life less as this perfect systematic thing and more as a, yeah being a good person is important, but so is having fun and being weird and accepting that you can’t always be perfect

Zane also clicks with Cole rather well

Some torture methods include: having to keep Kai and eventually Jay’s secret, having students who don’t always listen to him, being pushed out of his comfort zone and being too all out, etc...

Cole

Cole is Tahani- hear me out!

I’m not saying Cole is this rich model that raises money for charity and is super conceited and arrogant

It’s more of... you know Tahani’s bad relationship with her family? That’s Cole’s relationship with his dad.

Lou expects a lot out of Cole. Lou is also relatively rich, and ever since this big injury that prevents him from dancing, he expects Cole to exactly like him.

He sends Cole to Marty Oppenheimers, makes him dance a trash ton, never lets him have a break, and always compares him to literally everyone.

Like. Dancing and performing is his job.

Because of this, Cole feels like he has to be a dancer and that he has to be this amazing guy who can do the triple tiger sashay and literally anything, He feels like he has to host fancy parties and be sophisticated and such.

Cole actually dies by practicing the Triple Tiger Sashay. He was doing his weekly update on how it’s going for his dad, when he messes up and hits his head on a rock, and in his dazed stance, he ends up stumbling in the middle of the street and gets hit by a car.

He is in the Bad Place because he is never truly himself. He hides his true self and is a completely different person on the outside than he is on the inside. He never ever thought for himself. He is super fake all of the time to literally everyone because he isn’t himself. He is literally the most fake person on the planet and people can tell. Like, most of the people he hangs out with are super snobby dancers and trash, so they expect that from him, but like Zane, Kai, and Jay can tell how fake he’s being, even though he doesn’t want to be fake. He’s not trying to. So, like Tahani, everything good he did kind of had the wrong motivation behind it. He wasn’t good because he wanted to be, he was good because he felt like he had to.

Heck, the first night, Wu had him throw a big welcome party. Wu was like “we just know how much you love hosting parties” and Cole on the inside was like ‘ohh great’

Plus, he hates his house. Wu gave him this huge mansion because that’s what “he” wanted, when really it’s what his dad would have wanted

His platonic soulmate is Jay, which sucks because Jay doesn’t talk for awhile and Cole talks to himself a lot when he’s alone, and living with Jay is essentially being alone.

He and Jay actually torture each other a lot, but then they end up becoming the best friends

Cole isn’t the biggest fan of Kai for awhile because he’s trying so hard to stick to his reputation and being this sophisticated, fancy person his dad wanted and Kai tries changing that once he realizes what Cole is doing and is like no stop and Cole’s like but I need toooooo

But they end up liking each other

The others help Cole by showing him how to be himself. They teach him how to have his own thoughts and that he doesn’t have to be anything for anyone but himself. That he doesn’t have to be fake and they essentially show him who he is.

Heck, Kai, Zane, and Jay are the ones who teach him how to climb trees and help him discover his love for the outdoors!

They also helped him come to terms with his sexuality and being gay!!!

Cole was the last one to get ethics lessons with Zane. He was also the last one to find out Jay wasn’t a monk and that’s what made him learn about the classes and asked to be a part of them because he felt like he needed to learn

Torture methods include: forcing him to be what he was forced to be on Earth, having certain citizens recognize him as Lou’s son, being forced to host and throw big parties and events because that’s what he had to do on Earth so he must love it here, etc...

Jay

Jay is Jason

No, I’m not saying Jay is on the dumber side and does illegal things. I personally believe Jay is incredibly intelligent but I won’t get into that now.

When Jay gets there, Wu comes out and is like ‘Jianyu, come on in’ and Jay is like ‘??’ so he says nothing and then Wu says stuff about how he was a Buddhist Monk who took a vow of silence at the age of eight and would he like to keep it and Jay panics because uhh his name isn’t Jianyu, it’s Jay Walker and nods.

Jay likes talking. A lot. It calms him down, it keeps him sane, it helps him destress and connect since he is a more extroverted person, so not being able to talk is- get this- torture.

Jay on Earth wasn’t a terrible person. He worked with his parents at the junk yard while he had an engineering internship in the city nearby. He invented a lot and he was good at it.

What put him in the Bad Place, though, was that he was super conceited and condescending. He knows he’s smart and he knows he’s a good inventor, but he likes to rub that in. He is a rather arrogant person. He doesn’t always mean to be, but he is.

He also belittles people based on their intelligence and speaks to them like they’re dumb, treating them kind of like they’re stupid. Sometimes it;s intentional, sometimes it’s not.

It actually becomes a big problem with his relationship with Cole once he starts speaking. Cole went to a dance school and never really got a proper education so he wasn’t always the smartest person, and Jay does that to Cole more than he realizes until Kai calls bullshirt.

Then Jay realized and flipped he felt so bad

Anyways, Jay died from an electrical accident on an invention he was showing off at his internship that he had been bragging about to some of the others interns.

Jay hits it off with kai really well, he and Cole fight a lot and struggle to get a long at first because, well, we all know how they used to treat each other on the show, and he and Zane like talking to each other.

Jay is actually really freaked out about not belonging in The Good Place. He didn’t think he was a rotten person who deserved to be in The Bad Place, and so the constant wondering what happened to make the, think he was Jianyu and whether he belonged in The Good or Bad Place was- get this- torture.

When he found out about Zane’s classes, he was kind of unsure about it, especially since he was like Kai and had trouble sitting and listening instead of doing, but he ended up agreeing and he loved it! He learned a lot!

Plus, he enjoyed learning from Zane.

He actually did leave Kai notes saying that he didn’t belong here and ended up asking him for help because Kai definitely drunkenly told Jay about not belonging.

And Kai helped give him the courage to confess along with him.

The others help him by teaching him how to be more understanding, more caring, more open, less overreacting. He is also taught how to loosen up, since he tended to panic at the drop of a hat, and they helped him see the brighter side of things, making him even more of a positive thinking person, because he did think positively, he just... also panicked a lot.

Jay definitely thinks he deserves a Medium Place.

Torture methods include: not being able to speak for awhile, Cole always talking to him, wondering where he truly belongs, etc...

Others

okay so Wu is Michael, the architect, like I said. he hates humans for awhile, but then ends up legit learning from them and liking them in the end

Garmadon is Shawn, the Bad Place leader guy. He hates humans, especially the four and wants them in The Bad Place.

Pixal is Janet. She knows everything and with every reboot Wu puts her through, she becomes more human, much like the Good Janet in the show. Also, to call for her, just say Pixal.

I saw someone say Harumi is Bad Janet and I love that ?? So much?? I’d say she’s either Bad Janet or like, Trevor. I like that.

Skylor honestly seems like a Mindy St. Claire who lives in The Medium Place type, you know? She helps them out and stuff.

I think I might stick with The First Spinjitzu Master as the Judge...

Lloyd was a tricky one. Like, he doesn’t fit in with the four humans, so I was thinking, maybe Lloyd as Vicky? Like he pretends to be the Real Kai Smith? And then instead of staying an evil demon the whole time, he ends up joining the group as a good guy. Maybe? Anyone else have ideas?

Nya is also tricky. I think she doesn’t die. She was the person who tried making Kai a better person. Like, she tried really hard. And (SEASON THREE SPOILERS) she would be the person Garmadon selects to be in the testing neighborhood to make Kai angry because that’s not fair and they have to wipe her memory because Kai really wants her to get to The Good Place and needs to prove that she can improve with the others (END SPOILERS)

What if Dareth was Derek? hA

anyways, that’s all for now! I’m super tired! I hope you guys like these, and that they don’t suck! Does anyone agree? Disagree? Etc... (sorry I am so tired but FSM I forking love this show so much guys)

#ninjago #Ninjago headcanons #ninjago au

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