#they just ache sometimes
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me: [has mirror-touch synesthesia, which causes corresponding (albeit much less intense) pain in my body when i watch someone being physically harmed]
also me: i should watch a gory movie i think
#don't get me wrong i LOVE horror movies#adore thrillers and scary things in general#even ones with lots of blood and gore#they just ache sometimes#mirror touch synesthesia#personal
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remnants of where we have been
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#artists on tumblr#animated illustration#animated gif#digital art#2d animation#environment art#environment illustration#backgrounds#background illustration#art backgrounds#night sky#constellation#cozy#myillust#hellooo! just wanted to drop by and share this piece with you!#there were a combination of ideas here: i wanted to do a glowing cityscape of its city lights and have it softly blur into the night sky#the title is also a big description for this i guess - 'remnants of where we have been' is like how the city lights were where humans were#the clutter around the character shows the remnants or the past of what they did#the map-like contours of the skies are like where the stars have travelled#idk i guess it's something that i think about often and it makes my heart ache sometimes;;#anyways! i really hope you'll like this! thank you so much for reading through this if you have and for your support as always c':
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Take me to the docks, there is a ship without a name there And it is sailing to the middle of the sea The water there is deeper than anything you've ever seen Jump right in and swim until you're free
#stangst#stanley pines#stan pines#stanford pines#ford pines#atlas hands - benjamin francis leftwich#gravity falls#grunkle stan#grunkle ford#angst#fanart#divine draws#digital#this song made me think of them#i just know ford found any book he could on navigating by stars and about constellations for them both to learn from#they probably spent weeks studying space stuff too#they still remember it all#they still know the constellations and sometimes when they're feeling that ache really claw at them they lay out under the stars#and wonder if the other is doing the same#(they are)#there's also SO MUCH tiny detail in this piece and symbolism and i will break it down later!!!#tumblr PLEASE don't kill the quality
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Experimental, learning peace of latest evening's expressions - a gentle drop, and ode, and thought of young and so demure to ways unspeakable<з
#digital art#dark fantasy#gothic#Castlevania Netflix#Castlevania Nocturne#Alucard#Adrian Tepes#fan art#portrait practice#digital drawing#I toned to re-contribute my liney ways#in choice of trying and amuse#time passed drastically in-between of this creation#I toned it has a time that's now#for otherwise I've spent another month or two in being inconsiderable swaying unsatisfied and crudely demure#hand trembles out of drawn nature#but#there is adore and love that swells and aches just as long long time ago#I wonder sometimes#If I am from those times remembered#which tones I used and how my hands had looked#and what it was and how it's done#if I exist#if I am here#it's silly#ah#and also and of course#the referenced piece of classic and redrawn was#Mary Magdalene in the Cave#vasiliquemort
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Although I like the character, I dislike Morgana’s choices so, so much.
They don’t make sense to begin with and they show she is just a noble who craves power all for herself.
She is the first one to stand against Uther in everything; the first to ask for Gwen’s opinion or defend her, both when she is accused of practicing magic and when her father dies.
And suddenly, as soon as Morgana comes back, she hates Gwen’s guts and she is ready to execute her? The woman she was ready to get hurt for when they had been kidnapped? The same Morgana who begged Arthur to rescue her?
Oh, and talking about Arthur.
This man loves Morgana. She is his sister, for god’s sake.
Arthur’s the first one to take her defence in everything. Morgana’s the first one, even before Merlin came, who shows Arthur that he can talk back to Uther, that he can show to those he cares about the most that he loves them, that he can defend innocent people and go against the kingdom’s tyranny, if a child’s life is at stake.
Whenever Uther threatens Morgana, Arthur defends her, speaks for her, vouches for her.
When Arthur finally finds her, he’s so relieved.
He’s happy that she is alive, to the point the relationship with her changes drastically:
Arthur never once picks on her anymore, as much as he used to; he hugs her constantly; he tells her, “I’m glad you’re here”, when Uther is sick because of her (which, good, maybe that’s the only thing she did right. Get her revenge on Uther); in the deleted scene of, “The Eye of the Phoenix”, we’re shown Morgana giving the bracelet to Arthur, and she pleads him to wear it, because she is scared for him and his life, when in reality she just wants to kill him, and yet, what it is that Arthur does? He doesn’t even make fun of her. He smiles fondly, he accepts the gift, wears it from that moment on, and he gets up to hug her.
If anything, the most Arthur could have done, was to act afraid at first, but he wouldn’t have done anything practically, because she is Morgana, and when Arthur finds out she is his sister, that she has magic, he doesn’t bat an eye.
Not in all those years, had Arthur ever blamed her magic, just her choices.
And we see it.
��I thought we were friends.” He really believes it and he never has the chance to make it up to her.
“I could’ve saved her.”
How many choices did Arthur have to kill her? All those times she ran away, how easy could it have been to run after her and kill her? Arthur simply didn’t want to.
When he finds out about the fact that she has been tortured, he hurts. He almost deflects and doesn’t want the peace treaty anymore. He sees Gwen crying and leave the table and even if she is enchanted, Arthur thinks she means the tears, because he himself wanted to cry, because he cares about Morgana and hates himself and blames himself for what she has become.
That’s why I can’t bring myself to truly like Morgana, after her only goal is to overthrow Arthur.
But Arthur loves her.
Arthur is a man who’s ready to abandon his duty and his reign and his throne for those he loves, something that Morgana would have never done.
Arthur was ready to fix his mistakes, and Morgana only cared about the throne.
#sometimes i believe it would have taken arthur just a small proof that magic could have been good#and he would have started to amend his mistakes#because that’s what i think the character is like#arthur is just vulnerable and therefore more prone to manipulation#by everyone#and why wouldn’t he believe those he loves#right?#so he aches more when they betray him#he just wanted a family#i’m glad gwen and merlin gave him one#merthur#bbc merlin#merlin#arthur pendragon#merlin bbc
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on being aro and wanting to be held
#and the grass where you lay left a bed in your shape#and i looked over it and i ached#except there's no one there and there never was#i love being aromantic i really do#it's just sometimes the loneliness creeps in#aromantic#aro#green's art
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Dragon!Maggie/Princess Evie and Prince Max my beloved
the concept has my heart, has no backing in canon, and i don't care
He's her treasure hiss go away insert cat growling noises
#maggie going from avoidant standoffish with max to extremely attached is an idea i deeply love just#once they are best buds there is no. going. back.#my art#MDN art tag#trinket duo#renegades fanart#supernova epilogue spoilers#maggie white#evie artino#max everhart#fairytale au#renegades fairytale au#the renegades trilogy#renegades trilogy#renegades#renegades fandom#renegades marissa meyer#like she's wanted to be wanted for so long then gave up on it but then if Max was able to be what she needed#alongside her working harder for her first friendship she'd take it#Do the work and become more attached than ever she hasn't seen herself as wanted for so long#Plus. heres max who she just finds fascinating and wants to learn more and more about and who in an aching way reminds her of callum someti#es (sometimes TOO much) but also in exchange for her showing him around the city being protection he needs He doesn't ask her questions#he doesn't nag her into being one way or another like authority figures she's known and sometimes she can get him to break the rules!#she's never really had a peer like that before#at the children's home I theorize it was a hierarchy environment that probably wasn't the greatest definitely not the greatest#and I don't think she ever HAD friends before bc of both her antisocialness and the fact she has a big reputation for stealing your valuabl#s#AND max isn't familiar with gatlon city and while he's a Renegade and it's been a few years since he's been able to explore#while she accompanies him on taking notes about the city she can't help but want to keep him safe#at least I like that hc
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My gender is a lone ceratopsian on a cool, misty morning in a time long gone, chewing on plants still moist with dew as the first rays of sun tinge the clouds orange.
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god. sometimes i think about rebirth kon and how incredibly fucked up his entire situation is. and sometimes i want to play in that space and explore it but the thing is like... its pretty much impossible to actually resolve any of his tragedy there unless its just entirely a story about grief and i ... listen stories about grief absolutely have their place but i'm a softie and i like hurt/comfort and angst with happy endings. i can't do it.
like, genuinely. how fucked up would it be to spend most of your life suicidal until you actually die, and then a scant few years later - after you've been ripped away from everyone you know and love, and you haven't been able to go home but you've been aching for them, enough to persuade a woman to name her unborn child for your grandmother - you find out that they all forgot you. not voluntarily, but they did. and now they do remember you, but they also remember a timeline where you simply never existed. your most formative baseline thought patterns have always been ones where you're okay with killing yourself, and now you know everyone you've been yearning to return to remembers you, but also remembers a time when you simply did not exist, when they never knew you, when you weren't even an afterthought because you were never there.
would that not be completely and utterly horrific?
you know how kon has always been one giant existential crisis after another? haha yeah wow that sure has NOT changed. the only difference as far as i can tell is that so far, nothing in rebirth is acknowledging it. (possible exception to superboy man of tomorrow - at least the setup includes him outright stating he's not doing great and feels unnecessary, but we'll see where it goes!)
#shoutout to the one issue of yj19 where konbart talk about how fucked up this all is at least a bit#but its sooo fucked up and evil that pretty much all the fandom talks about wrt kon in rebirth era is just OOH HES JEALOUS ABT TIM/BER.#like. i know why (Those Batfam Fans™ who dont recognize kon as a character rather than an accessory to tim) but STILL#girl he has bigger fish to fry lmao#its just tragic bc *i* dont want to write anything about this it makes me SAD and idk how to resolve any of it#but sometimes i Do want to see a really good aching bittersweet character study#but no one has written that for me. sad. fucked up :/#rimi talks#kon#ive just been thinkin abt this sooo much since smot1 dropped the toher day. augh
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being mixed and disconnected from part of your culture is fucking wild man i had my belated graduation party yesterday adn my native grandma gave me a necklace with a pretty little stone tht had a handwritten note folded up inside the box that described its significance to our people as a token of good luck and spiritual protection and i fucking cried why did i do that!!
#skye's ramblings#i hardly ever get to see them man its such a huge part of my identity that i. just desperately wish i could take part in more. i dunno#the stuff my grandma makes is so pretty i have some beadwork and dreamcatchers and necklaces and theyre seriously my most prized possesions#sometimes i randomly remember the fry bread i had at her house like several years ago n then i wish i had fry bread. frybreadis so good man#i dunno!! i just get an aching feeling whenever i think about the part of my identity that stays with the family i rarely get to see#like. they have a piece of me or something n technicaly i dont need it to live but. it makes me feel more complete?? or someghjng#i dontknow i dont think any of tjis makes sense its late and iam simply thinking. many such cases
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well yes
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#im still thinking of my space au communications tech eddie and astronaut buck and how bucks mission logs start out as just reports.#date time vital signs ship stats etc#but they get more and more personal. and sometimes they’re rambling thoughts connecting quick and joyfully into fun fact after fun fact#eddie loves those. bucks eyes so so so bright in those#but sometimes bucks quiet. only says a few words. just intro name date. signs off with a laugh that doesn’t reach his eyes and says#‘this is astronaut buckley.. buck. this is buck signing off.’ and he sounds so tired so defeated eddie aches. wishing he could reach thru#the screen and comfort this man who’s quickly becoming someone he can’t stop thinking about. can’t stop falling in love with#((celestial theme buddie four weeks late yayyy))#astronaut au
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“Why does anyone commit acts other consider unspeakable?” “Love. It is always love.”
#.bullshit ( ooc )#Love is one of those words that the road can be paved with good intentions and the road will be littered with ache#Love will always be hard and sometimes bloodstained but will it be worth it?#Part of me always wants to say unclear - but the other half of me says watch and wait love can always evolve past this as well#You just have nurture it and take it off the path of darkness stepping into the light is hard and overwhelming but it can be done#Alright done being introspective
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i rly am a lineless celshade artist deep down huh :')
#sovo art#sovo highlights#baldur's gate#something i wanna try more sometime is adding flat elements like flat patterns/flat shapes that aren't molded to form at all#anyway i just ordered these as buttons! fingers crossed they turn out well#i was going to draw imoen too but since it's Joint Ache Week i was like actually.... stopping here is fine#also my plan to draw more was before i realized they were gonna end up this detailed skefjnsefk#the color setup is partly from the fake screenshots & partly from the chibis and what rly cost the most hours was keeping#the dedicated shading layers on their clothing instead of just doing simple lines.... that one will rly get ya#xan x radri
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Ok, Odysseus, the raining* king of Ithaca, is my Roman Empire.
And I don't particularly mean all the "adventures" he went through or the wrong he might have done.
It's the pain of a parent who has not been able to watch his child grow up.
He remembers him as a baby. He was once very close to home, to be able to see (and raise) him still as a child, but that too was taken from him. If it weren't for the right circumstances, he might not have recongnise him in adulthood.
* I apologize for this silly joke that still makes me smile.
#yes it's thanks to Epic#but I have read the Odyssey in the month between finally getting into Epic and the Thunder Saga release. it's one of my favourite books now#and both versions of Odysseus live in my head now and my heart aches for both of them for reasons that are sometimes similar#Epic's Odysseus is more centred on his wife which is very lovely and then his son#the original Odysseus seems to be more concerned for Ithaca and then his son#however they both care for all three#and the part where the original Odysseus finally reunites with Penelope is one of my favourite parts#I'm not a mother yet#don't know if I'll ever be#although I'd love to#just imagining being kept from my child for 20 years. not being to see them grow and be there for them when they would need me makes me cry#I don't know if I could survive that#I get extremly sad when thinking about Anticlea as well#Odysseus#Odysseus of Ithaca#Telemachus#Anticlea#parental love#the Odysseey#Epic: the Musical#“Time for me to be the father I never was”#oversharing#I'm having an emotional day today sorry about that
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Amazing moments becoming only memories gives a sad sinking feeling
#I was exhausted and sometimes miserable on our London trip due to all the walking#but now I’m about to leave for work today and I’m just holding onto the memories#and I wish I could be back there#yeah I hated the crowds and now I’m sick likely because of people and the cold#but the sound of the city and the sights of the buses and buildings#I already ache to be back#and I don’t know if or when my next trip is going to be let alone the next time we get to go to Europe#text
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