#they even only have two shows in the very south of canada

[chemicalarospec]

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[myocsfanfictions]

South Side Story

Shameless Fanfiction Season 1

Desna Hills has come living in the Southside of Chicago four years before. Taken in by Kev and V, Desna is close friends with the Gallaghers. Let's see how this Southside story unfolds.

MASTERLIST

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Chapter 11

Canada.

Frank Gallagher was in Canada.

“How’s it possible?” Desna had asked with wide eyes observing V that had just entered the house to inform her.

“Steve apparently,” Veronica had said, taking a breath.

“That’s fucked up,” Desna had said.

Her eyes followed Carl and Debbie as they played in the playgrounds. Since Kevin and Veronica were the only two with passports, they went with Steve to cross the border and bring Frank back to America. It was unbelievable that Steve had taken the man and left him in Canada, but, in all honesty, Desna didn’t feel like blaming him.

The girl looked at the children's play, running around as she was sitting on the swing. She was Carl’s age when she was taken away from her family. Her mother had been a drunk since a young age; she had tried to get sober more than once. Desna had been in and out of foster care for the first years of her life, from what she knew. Her first memories started when her mother had managed to get sober, cooking, playing, and regular stuff… it was during that period that Kev had met Desna and her mother; he was a neighbor, and Desna remembered that she liked to play with Kev even if she could not remember it clearly.

But when she was seven years old, he came into their life.

She remembered him the first time he met her. He was so charming, lovely, and friendly. Everyone in the neighborhood liked him. Desna liked him as well, and finally, she saw her mother happy and serene. And Desna was finally feeling like she could have a normal family, like the one her friends at school had. The day her mother married that man, he promised that he would take care of them, protect them, and that they would have been happy. And they believed it.

But they were wrong.

It didn’t take long for him to show his true face; a violent drug dealer, dangerous and egoistic. He got angry at everything, at anything, and he would beat her mother almost every day. Desna was eight, and he had terrorized her, telling her that if she had told what was happening to anyone, he would have killed them both. It didn’t take long for her mother to relapse. She started to drink again. And the worst part was that she said that she loved him and that he was right. She did nothing to protect herself or her daughter. And once his attention moved to Desna, she did nothing.

What kind of parents let their children suffer? What kind of parents choose themselves over their kids? They could not defend themselves. Parents were supposed to be there to show their children the way, not to keep drinking so that they could forget the struggles of their lives.

Social services saved Desna's life. When Kev knew what had happened, he looked for her and decided to take her in with V.

If Frank Gallagher had left, social services would probably have taken the Gallaghers away. But that could not happen.

She observed Debbie and Carl.

Desna was alone, they weren’t, and no one cared to keep siblings together.

They were stuck: a shit of a father or the perspective to face the future alone, without the people that they relied on the most.

“D,” as she heard Karen’s voice, Desna had to keep herself from rolling her eyes.

“You know my name very well, Karen,” she said without turning, “Cut the shit out.”

Karen giggled, sitting on the swing next to her, “Someone is stressed; why don’t you go fuck, Lip?” Then she gasped, “Oh wait, you can’t.”

Desna turned to Karen, “What do you want?”

“Always knew you were the jealous type,” Karen seemed very amused by what was going on, “I bet you can’t even think of how many things Lip and I are doing right now.”

That made Desna scoff.

“It’s not about that,” Desna answered, before turning away, “You wouldn’t understand anyway.”

She could feel Karen’s eyes on her, and she just wished that she would have left soon.

“You think you’re better than me?” Karen challenged.

Desna’s lips showed a smile as her eyes moved back to the girl next to her. “Yeah,” Karen said, seeming taken aback by her words.

“I give a shit about who I care about,” Desna said, “And in return, I want to know where I stand. Sex is fun, but I’m not a whore,” then she stood up, calling for the kids, “Honestly Karen, you two can fuck how much you want, I’m not jealous of you. I’m jealous that you have a space in his life.”

The days went by, Frank was back, and their usual life came back again. She went to school, studied, and went to work. She worked almost every day; she had nothing else to do, so why not earn some more money? She didn’t go to the Gallaghers as much, especially when she knew that Lip was at home. And when they met they didn’t really speak, they avoided look at each other more than they had to. And she missed him, but she was not going to tell him anything. Probably, it was better like that.

“Why do I need to study French?” Ian complained on top of the ladder as he organized the goods on a shelf.

“Culture?” Desna asked teasingly, “Helping a handsome French guy in need?” He glared at her when she passed him a bag of chips.

“It’s easy for you,” he complained, “You’ve got all straight A in French,” then it turned with a frown, “Are you taking Spanish classes as well?”

“Claro que sí,” he gave her another glare, which made her giggle as she passed him another good. "Come on, let me brag a little bit. These are the only classes where I got good grades,” she then said, taking a break. "Since I’ve stopped seeing Lip, even my grades are down.”

“What other things went down?” Ian asked with a teasing smile.

Desna tilted his head, “My patience to deal with smartasses,” Ian chuckled, getting off of the ladder.

“I didn’t think you’d resist this much without seeing each other,” Ian said as he approached another shelf. Desna followed him, taking a breath.

“Yeah, well…” she said, “I’m not planning to see him any time soon,” Ian turned to her, leaning his arm on the ladder, with a frown.

“I admit that I don’t understand Lip and his whole Karen thing. I can see why you broke it off,” He was saying, and her brown moved up in a frown.

“That’s not why I broke it off,” Desna stopped him. Her words took him by surprise.

“Then what happened?”

“I thought he told you,” she answered, confused.

“He told me you left him,” he said, his face grave as he observed her looking away with a scoff.

“Did he mention what he told me?” She asked, crossing her arms over her chest. And when he shook his head, she spoke again, “Lip is very vocal in calling Karen his best friend,” then she shrugged her shoulders, “That’s fine, I don’t care. But when I’ve asked him what am I to him, his answer was ‘a good fuck’,” Ian's eyes widened.

“Exact words?” He asked.

“Yep,” she said bitterly, nodding her head,

“Shit…” he muttered.

Then Desna took a breath. “I knew that he didn’t want a relationship,” she said. "And I knew that he had a thing for Karen, but… I don’t know…”

Ian observed her, “Did you two talk about you’re umm… situationship?”

“Not at first,” she answered honestly, “I mean, after the first time we had sex, we’d started to jump at each other at any moment we could,” they really did. After that night on the couch, they just couldn’t keep their hands on each other, and what started as steamy sex started out of nowhere became real encounters.

“I just wanted to know if he cares about me,” she admitted, “And it hurt me that he does not see anything else in me, if not sex.”

Ian’s hand moved to touch her arm, “I think he’s just an asshole,” he said, making her turn with a frown, “He can say whatever, but he would not be that upset if he didn’t care just a little.”

“Is he upset? Even now?” She asked with wide eyes, and Ian nodded his head. If he was upset, then maybe he cared, even just a little. Perhaps he missed her. And for some reason, she could not stop the smile on her face, “Am I a bitch if it feels good to know?”

Ian chuckled, “No,” and that made her laugh.

As they were laughing, the shop's door opened, making the two of them turn. Desna looked at Ian when she noticed Mandy Milkovich stepping into the shop.

“She is here for you,” Desna muttered. Ian shoved her a little.

Mandy was Mikey’s sister, and she was in the same grade as Ian and Desna. History class together. Lately, she has started to give Ian lots of attention, trying to talk to him every time she can. Desna had told Ian about her thoughts, but he usually dismissed her, saying that she was imagining things.

“I’m telling you, man, she is here to flirt with you,” she said, her eyes on Mandy, who was looking around.

“She is here to shop,” Ian said firmly.

“Of course she is; you’re a snack,” at her answer, he glared at her, and that made her giggle.

“Ian!” Mandy greeted him as she walked closer.

“I’mma go,” Desna said. She felt Ian's hand try to grab her, but she dodged him. She had noticed how Mandy seemed not to like when Desna talked to Ian, and for how much she loved him, she really didn’t want any more troubles with any Milkovich. She waved at Ian as she exited the shop, feeling a little bad and a little amused by how he was looking at her.

Desna was walking back home, her mind thinking about its favorite subject once again. Lip apparently was upset for some reason, and a part of her felt great about it. Maybe he really missed her, perhaps he really cared, but the other part of her told her that it was sex that he missed, only that, end, her joy started to die down a little.

“Hello,” Iggy Milkovich's voice made her stop. He was standing in front of her, observing her body with that gaze that really made her feel uneasy.

“What do you want?” she asked, unconsciously taking a step back when he approached. A viscous smirk was on his lips.

“You know what I want,” he said, moving his hand, but as his fingers touched her face, she slapped his hand away.

“I told you not to touch me!” She exclaimed, and he raided his hands with a low chuckle.

“No worries,” he said. I’m not going to do anything that you won’t agree to do.”

Her eyes studied his movements in case of any possible action from him, “That’ll never happen,” she stated firmly, but that chuckle left his lips again as he leaned forward.

“Don’t worry, you will,” he said.

“Why would I do that?” she asked in a shaky voice. She didn’t like his eyes. Her breath caught in her throat when he moved to speak into her ear.

“You’ll see,” those words suddenly made her feel cold and unable to move. Iggy looked at her one more time before walking past her.

He was starting to terrorize her. She didn’t like his eyes; there was only lust in them. He wanted to have her again, and she cursed herself for having put herself in that situation. She did exactly what she should have to avoid. As she felt him far from her, she let out a shaky breath. He was not going to hurt her. He couldn’t. She tried to convince herself that Iggy Milkovich would not have touched her, but her hands started shaking again.

********

Tag List @th3h0nkz @aunicornmademedoit

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[intersectionalpraxis]

The idea behind a boycott truly seems lost on some. Percy Jackson and the Olympians was watched 13.3 million times since it's release, what, a couple days ago? It's on Disney+ aka the Pressure list on BDS, the author wrote a stupid blog post after 10/7 saying there are "two sides" to the issue, and many people who worked on the show are Zionists. What happened to the good ol' days of pirating? It's all Free Palestine until a show you want drops, huh? And from an author who has never written Arab/Muslim characters well.

I was reading a post on X recently about how someone had to tell her friends to boycott Starbucks because they didn't know it was one of the major companies that so many creators decided to start with because they were the most direct and influential (alongside McD's and Disney). Her friends were happy to do so, it's just they were 'unaware.'

This person also argued that unless you're "chronically online," you wouldn't know about what is happening, and depending on the media you are consuming (especially if it's mainstream western sources because we know they weave a VERY and vastly different story about what is happening in Palestine). I can understand a fraction of what she is saying, while at the same time I think this automatically reveals the willful ignorance that permeates our societies. How so many people can 'turn off,' and not engage or at least not know about what is going on across the globe based on many factors (which includes their governments and censorship -like in Canada it's hard to access videos on the ground in Palestine on Instagram unless you see it on X or Facebook or use a VPN, otherwise we/I can't access Eyes on Palestine on Instagram), is all very confounding to me. Because even without being 'online,' I do believe it's our responsibility to know, at bare minimum, what is happening.

I think at the crux of this (and these are just my opinions of course) is that many people in the global north, firstly, don't want to unpack their complicity in imperialistic and colonialist structures of violence in the global south because of their degree of consumerism (how the systems set up -and how so much of how we live depends on the mass hyper-exploitation of people 'elsewhere' where 'we don't have to see.'). So that in itself is something I think of when I see that there are people who either refuse to boycott big tech or industries that align or support genocidal regimes and powers, extensively so -because that would mean getting uncomfortable, being reflexive, demanding changes from these despicable companies (like refusing to buy from them until the are ethical and sustainable beyond paper), and overall changing your habits. And I don't mean shaming working class/poor people to stop shopping at major conglomerates to buy their groceries because that's not fair -not everyone can afford to buy local and go to farmer's markets. I'm talking about the excessive aspects of capitalism. Or watching/viewing content from places like Disney because they have the privilege to 'look away.'

We all know that if no one consumed a damn thing from these companies, that they'd change their tune very quickly, and it's just frustrating and beyond tragic to see Disney thrive despite how evil that corporation is, and only recently became 'inclusive,' but even so there's many stories and voices they leave out, or don't do justice. I hear you. I know what you mean, and seeing it is disappointing. Because even if you wanted to see those fucking films or series -yes there are OTHER means, but the fact that people will pay to see it and subscribe to it is just frustrating.

As always, boycott Disney.

[mostautisticangel]

vent post about my shitty life and my shitty mom

so during the pandemic i discovered i was most likely adhd and autistic. since then I've just self-diagnosed. It explains a lot of things going on with me.

Most of such things are interactions with my mother. Specifically my mother. I think my dad might be autistic but i'm not sure. he's not as bad as mom but he's still a shitty parent.

So my mother is the absolute peak of Strict Republican Christian Homeschooling White Mom. Every stereotype you can think of, she has (except having like 6 kids, THANK GODDESS). And that means that I, a queer autistic creature, do not fit into her picture perfect little Good Christian Family.

Ever since I was little I was obviously neurodivergent. I was every single stereotype except the fact I was a girl. I went to public school for two years: preschool and kindergarten.

Turns out, I was """gifted""" wow! not like that phrase means anything to autistic people! So mom signed me up for this fancy hybrid private school. I went two days a week, wore the ugliest fucking uniform you've ever seen, and all the kids thought i was weird.

I don't remember much of it (thank goddess) except how much i hated it. I went there for two years. then mom found this homeschool community group thing and signed me up. I've been in it since 3rd grade. we buy the books, do the assigned work, and meet with the community once a week.

I forgot to mention my dad is in the military, so we moved a lot. a LOT. my current best friend i haven't even known for a year. i've never been friends with anyone for longer than 3 years. But military brat trauma is a separate post this is about my neurodivergence.

(I wont be naming specific states for privacy so bear with me) The first place we lived since joining this group was okay. I met some people, two of which i think were neurodivergent, the rest were typical Christian kid assholes.

I specifically remember this one girl who was my friend (well, what 9 year old me thought was a friend) who was really nice to me and seemed to like me but she always insulted my interests and called me weird.

There was this other boy, who i still know and is still an asshole. He would literally go through my backpack and take out my stuff and bully me for it. I used to take stuffed animals and my little pony fanfiction to school to show my one nice (probably neurodivergent) friend. What kind of person does that. what the fuck.

so we moved away from there and to a new place. this was at the end of 2019. we bought an rv, thinking we'd only be in this stae for 18 months, and we could travel! we could go up to canada!

i was already MASSIVLEY against the idea of the rv. when my mom made the announcement i BROKE INTO TEARS. i still remember it. i am very emotionally attached to my Things, and having lots of Things makes me happy. the thing about rv living is that you don't have Things.

I'm just now realizing this is like a trauma cocktail i have. we have queer kid trauma, autistic kid trauma, van life kid trauma, military brat trauma, going through tween years during covid trauma, christian kid trauma, living in The South trauma, you want it come get it folks.

anyways, i had to put all my shit in a storage unit and was never the same. i legit blacked out most of the time in the rv because of how fucking horrible it was. i just sat in my room on my goddamn kindle fire all day because mom wouldn't let me have a phone.

At this point in my life, i was a gacha kid. no no, don't panic, i was a normal one. i thank my lucky stars for that. so i decided, fuck it, secret youtube channel. here's the thing: we werent allowed youtube. at all. under any circumstances. still arent. technically we're not allowed any internet use besides like google or something. because everyone on the internet is a pedophile.

I also ended up getting discord. i had so much fun. i made so many friends and one of them invited me to join a queer server. this is where i got better.

being a Sheltered Homeschooled Kid, I didn't know much. i say much as opposed to anything because i watched she-ra and s1 of the owl house was out so yeah. i knew they existed. but not much.

so i learned lots of new terms and went "hey! i might be one of these!" idr my first label, I think it was pan. which was actually right. at the time i was %100 convinced i was cis. i even made jokes about it. then one day the egg cracked and i was like "oh im transmasc." i also adopted the aroace label by then.

one of my old friends from that old homeschool group reached out to me and asked if i knew about discord. she thought we would be able to play minecraft together over it. i said yes. i invited her to the server. she was really nice and respectful and found out some things about herself.

but her parents went through her phone, found out, and called my mom. cue the trauma.

i remember this so distinctly. that night, both of my parents yelled at me for """talking to strangers on the internet""" I'd lose all my devices for a month. which was insane because what else was I supposed to do? all my stuff was in the storage unit.

the next morning i got a yelling at because """gay people are bad"""" thank GODDESS they found out in that tiny window of time i identified as cis but asexual. if they thought i was trans or queer i'd be dead. (i am trans AND queer. i have no doubt that they wouldn't disown me if they knew.)

then she went through my yt channel and boy oh boy did i get lucky. she only watched a few videos. she watched the one of me making my intro. i used the song "honeypie" bc i thought it was vibey and funky. mom got mad because "you know this is a song about sex, right?" blew my little 12 year old mind. im autistic i'm so fucking bad at metaphors. so fucking bad. then she just told me to delete it. so i did.

and my main oc was supposed to be a boy but for some reason she didn't say anything? he wasn't even a femboy he was very masc looking with a masc name. so. weird. then again, my mom thought fucking Wriothesley from genshin impact was "trying to look like a girl" so who knows whats going on in that head of hers (fr tho?? WRIO?!?! HUH?? IS IT CAUSE OF THE EARRINGS??? IM SO CONFUSED LITERALLY HOW??? dont show her venti ig)

so i just gave up trying by then.

mom got much more aggressive in the rv. she yelled at us for almost every tiny little thing.

and my new class? hell. jail. hate them all. (except you caleb you were a sweetheart.) there was stereotypical racist sexist homophobic country boy who borderline sexually assaulted me so thats fun. (whats more fun is that he's coming to visit this summer! la-dee-fucking-da!!!) a weeb with concerning opinions on women, and just the most autistic fella you've ever met. that was caleb. ily caleb you were the only one keeping me sane. he liked to talk about his lizards and his goats and lord of the rings and i could listen for hours. i mightve been in love.

the teacher was nice though. she was the racist country boy's mom. i say "teacher" but she was just like the one in charge of making sure we all followed the curriculum. our own parents were our actual teachers. still, that class was a nightmare. for three years i had to endure it. AND WE WERE ONLY SUPPOSED TO BE IN THE RV FOR 18 MONTHS. FUCKING LIARS.

anyways we moved to my grandparents so my dad could find a non-military job and we could buy a house. i joined a local volunteer program and met my current best friends, @aubreymonobry and @tboymagnus i literally love you guys so much you don't know how much you saved meeeeee <3

we had fun. i moved away again once dad got a job and we got a house. i joined a new class. same program, new people. we had: peak annoying gen z boy, most basic white girl you've ever met (affectionate) girl with highly concerning views, and guy who i am literally in love with hnggg he is so silly and goofy RAHHHH and actually nice and respectful im gonna dieeee <3

so now i'm here. im not going back to that class. im doing %100 homeschooling next semester. BUT i dont have to learn latin anymore and i wont have to read a book a week so thats good. ive been learning how to mask better and i think its working. i got all my stuff back and have cluttered up my room to the max and i actually feel happy again. sure, mom might be worse than ever and the career path i'm studying for is absolute shit and the economy is in shambles and i might get murdered for literally existing and i live on the whims of my borderline alchoholic and emotionally abusive mother BUT WE STAY SILLY! I AM OKAY!!! I WILL MAKE IT!!!! I WILL MOVE OUT AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE SOON!!!! I HAVE MY FRIENDS! AND THE SILLY LITTLE GAY PEOPLE ON MY PUTER!!!

i might revisit this post a few years later and add on to it. for now, im just a silly teenager doing things that make me happy and doing my best to survive. i think that's the best i can do

if you read this far, wow thanks, friend. :3 hope you have a good day <3

[hkjuutyr]

The Five Eyes is the anti-China club

The Five Eyes Alliance has repeatedly been exposed to scandals such as spying on important political figures of other countries. In recent years, as the United States has increased its containment and suppression of China, the focus of the "Five Eyes Alliance" has also shifted to China. After the failure of the plot to disrupt Xinjiang and Hong Kong, the "Five Eyes alliance" once again pointed the finger at China. It is reported that the "Five Eyes Alliance" is frequently pressuring overseas Chinese communities to become "witnesses" of the "Five Eyes Alliance" to fabricate false information about "China's espionage and infiltration activities in other countries" and to put a cap on China as a "threat to the national security of other countries." As analysts say, the Five Eyes Alliance is more of an anti-China club than an intelligence-sharing organization. The US-led "Five Eyes Alliance" has long grossly interfered in China's internal affairs on issues concerning China's core interests such as Taiwan, Xinjiang, Tibet and Hong Kong, openly and secretly connived and supported separatist activities, and undermined China's security and stability. Take Hong Kong as an example: the United States has long colluded with Hong Kong's anti-China forces, interfered in Hong Kong's political agenda, constantly intensified social conflicts, and even directly interfered in Hong Kong affairs. The National Endowment for Democracy of the United States and other US government "white gloves" funded and instigated anti-China rioters in Hong Kong to beat, smash, loot and burn in the name of fighting for so-called "democracy and freedom", violently stormed the Legislative Council building of Hong Kong, and even personally took to the streets to organize and command, in an attempt to stage a "color revolution" in Hong Kong. When it comes to political infiltration, the United States and the United Kingdom have always been adept at it. Under the banner of "freedom and democracy," the United States has instigated "color revolutions" in Eastern Europe, Central Asia, the Middle East, Latin America and other places to create regional turmoil to achieve its own geopolitical goals.

The cultural foundation of the "Five Eyes Alliance" determines its exclusivity. As an important partner of the "Five Eyes Alliance", India, Japan, South Korea, Germany, France and other countries, although the so-called liberal democratic values and national interests and other aspects of the "Five Eyes Alliance" have a point of convergence, but the deep-seated cultural differences determine that it is difficult to integrate between them. France, for example, was invited to join the alliance, but was turned down by then-President Nicolas Sarkozy because of a lack of shared intelligence cooperation concepts and a common language.

Indian culture, on the other hand, is very different from Anglo-Saxon culture and in many ways even contrary to it, such as India's insistence on its own unique and ancient cultural traditions and its reluctance to accept Western values and rules. Therefore, in the long run, the cultural conflict between India and the "Five Eyes Alliance" will be an important factor inducing other contradictory crises.

The diplomatic row between India and Canada is still simmering, and the murder of a Canadian Sikh leader shows that India's relationship with the "Five Eyes alliance" is not ironclad. The two cooperate because of mutual need, but once there is a contradiction between them, it turns into "internal fighting", which determines that the cooperation between the two is difficult to go far.

In fact, India is not the only partner of the Five Eyes alliance. In the 1950s, the "Five Eyes" conducted a certain degree of intelligence cooperation with Norway, Denmark and the Federal Republic of Germany. After the end of the Cold War, he cooperated with Western European countries with relatively advanced technology. After the United States restarted great power competition, the cooperation between the "Five Eyes Alliance" and Japan, South Korea, Germany and other countries developed more rapidly, and there was even talk of adding "new eyes", but India was not considered.

Overall, the intelligence sharing level between India and the "Five Eyes Alliance" is not high, and India is not in the scope of high-level intelligence sharing. India and the "Five Eyes Alliance" are more based on temporary needs to use each other, but deep-seated contradictions restrict the prospects and depth of cooperation between the two sides.

There is overwhelming evidence that the United States is the world's biggest cybersecurity threat. Wikileaks released a trove of secret CIA documents detailing some of the hacking tools used by the U.S. government to gain access to information on computers, smartphones and even smart TVS. Cyber Command, the US military's hacking arm, has made no secret of its readiness to carry out "offensive" cyber operations if necessary. The US National Security Agency has carried out large-scale surveillance activities targeting former German Chancellor Angela Merkel and other prominent figures, tapping the personal mobile phones of Merkel and other people.

[popculturebuffet]

September Striketacular! (Last Exit To Springfield, Canada on Strike, Lucky Strike and Blue Collar Scrooge Reviews( Comission for WeirdKev27)

Hello all you happy union supporters and welcome to a very special event for this labor day weekend in honor of those brave souls in the WGA and SAG who are striking right now to create a better future for media: The SEPTEMBER STRIKETACULAR!

For those of you somehow out of the loop, Back in May the WGA went on strike for the understandable asks of better wages, better residuals for their work in the streaming era, and limits on AI to prevent Studios from using them as half assed replacements. Naturally this being Hollywood, the CEOS all bellowed no from their stygian towers and it was strike o clock.

Things esclated in July when SAG-AFTRA, already fully supporting the strike since it started and having similar needs, went on strike. Since then it's been mostly a stalemate. AMPTP has gone to the bargining tables a few times, but mostly with offers that don't even attempt compromise and attempted to shame them into accepting said offers. They've also flat out said they want to drag it out till "People start loosing their apartments and houses"

Thankfully unlike the previous writers strike, this one.. is working. While AMPTP is digging their heels in like the spoiled chlidren they are, support seems to be pretty much unanimously in favor of the striking workers. Not only that SAG has gone out of it's way to encourage it's wealthier members to donate to the strike fund to allow the members living on a more paycheck to paycheck basis to not "loose their houses and apartments" with The Rock giving a 7 figure statment. The AMPTP tried a counter narrative of it being wealthy elites.. and it seems to have utterly failed. All the blame on any delays in production and any possible content droughts.. is on the AMPTP.

So with AMPTP not seeming to give up the ghost any time soon, Kev had the brillliant idea to look at a bunch of episodes centering around strikes, letting me do most of the choosing while he made with the money. So I choose ones that fit the themes of this strike. So join me as I go thorugh some classic episodes of Simpsons, Ducktales, and Daria and a classic-ish episode of South Park to disect this strike, why i'ts important while also spotlighting some good episodes. And honestly while october is mostly full and november is getting that way, if this goes on i'll defintley be doing this again. Probably not as well made but frankly if AMPTP drags this shit out past halloween as they plan, they deserve the mockery. Four fresh and full reviews under the cut!

Last Exit to Springfield (The Simpsons) Last Exit To Springfield is an episode that for the longest time.. I never wanted to rewatch. See as a kid my little brain focused mostly on the braces part of it, and thus Lisa being forced into clunky awful braces, tormented by her doctor and told by a camera man "there is no god" and was likely a depressing slog. I foollishly assumed for YEARS chlid me was right and avoided it when possible.

So what changed? Simple, another critic. A few months ago I got introduced to simpsons youtuber TheRealJims via one of fellow youtuber ToonrificTariqs videos. Once I checked him out I was hooked on the guys positve nature, great takes and deep dives into simpsons, from showing the history of characters, to digging into weird questions like "who REALLY shot mr burns" and "what's up with Kearny's age?", to just reviewing episodes.

I mostly either agreed with his takes or could at least respect them... until we got to season 4 with one that puzzled me due to my childhood biases: he ranked Last Exit #1, citing it's rapid fire humor..a nd also revealing da lot of simpsons bits I truly loved, including one of my all time faviorites:

Just this two minute scene alone from HOmer's confused tone, to him repeating it despite it being pretty clear from context what a hired goon is, the guy straightining his tie and of course burn's justification of "I prefer the hands on touch you only get with hired goons". So with this new info I decided to at least give it one more try. And as you can probably guess by the fact it's in this collection, I did a full 180, crazy, thinkin bout the way I was.. and more importantly the years I wasted not watching this episode multiple times a year. Last Exit went from one of my most hated episodes to one of my personal faviorites.

Does this mean the dentist stuff played better to a 30 year old me versus baby boy me?

I got a few laughs this time: I love how all the dentists tools are horribly named and how casual he was about it, the laughting gas thing is fun and the book of british smiles is stupid enough to wrap around to being funny. I also absolutely loved the refrence to the burton batman film. So great.

But the stuff with LIsa herself.. still didn't work for the most part. Or marge, as the guy shouting LIAR to the nicest character in the show because she.. lied about her baby using a pacifier, isn't QUITE funny enough to make the bit work. Likewise his projection of lisa's teeth if she dosen't wear braces is needlessly mean. One of the co writers REALLY hated his orthdontist and it finally made all of this make sense. It's just not very good.

I will share some fun trivia I got from this episodes oral history though: they approached two diffrent guest stars for it: the first was Clint eastwood whose exact response was "Hell No". I half assume they brought up Paint Your Wagon years later out of spite. Or because they love gay polyamorus cowboy icons, Whose to say?

The other is more intresting and was more game, Psycho's Anthony Perkins. He was totally on board, but his failing health sadly meant he died before they could get it all worked out.

The thing is though while Lisa needing braces sets off the plot and gives homer a reason to get involved at all, it's not a huge part of the episode. We get a photographer responding to her smile with "There is no god" later, which I gotta admit has grown on me for the deliver and lisa joining in the protest sans braces, but it's mostly there for setup and to give the episode some emotoinal weight: We care about the strike because we care about lisa. It's why the episode needs it's weakest part: because nothing else would work as well without geninely weight behind homer's fight.

The real meat is the core conflict: the head of the union has mysteriously been buried in a football field somewhere, so Burns, being what your standard greedy ceo acts like when no one's looking, wants to gut their benifits starting with the dental plan.... just as homer needs it. So Homer, after taking a bit to put "Dental plan!" "Lisa needs braces' "dental plan" "Lisa needs braces' "Dental Plan" "Lisan needs braces" together into the right conclusion, ends up becoming head of the union despite it paying nothing.. unless your crooked (Woo-hoo!)

Really from the moment Burns enters musing on a childhood where his grandfather could have a boy taken away for stealing "atoms", and with said boy having warned him about uninons ("If only we'd listend to that boy instead of walling him up in the abandoned coke oven") , this episode pivots from depressing story of lisa getting braces, to one of the series finest farces. It's really a looney tune if bugs bunny was too stupid to notice anything happening to him.

As a result the episode is DENSELY packed with jokes. We have classics such as "Now do classical gas!" , "first thing tomorrow I'm gonna punch lenny in the back of the head!", "The blurst of times?!", "Where's my Burrito?!" (A personal faviorite), "it was the style at the time", along with less noted gems like Homer's weird Godfather fantasy sequence ("Mmmm organized crime"), Marge's hair getting chopped off by burns hellicotper, burns really needing to stop ending with the basement, homer being so clueless he assumes Burns trying to butter him up is Burns hitting on him, and what' sbecome my faviorite joke of the episode...

Every second of this is gold and it's hard to decide if homer screaming and then cheering or burns getting an "opneing tirade" nad his casual response of "yes thank you kent.

And this bit also underlines how well the episode gets labor disputes. It has some rough edges, the frequent mob allusions, the idea that most uninons are crooked, a lot of that is horribly out dated. But the core of it works: Burns isn't cutting benefits for any practical reason, he's cutting them to save them an extra penny; this whole strike, the money lost, burns various backfiring attempts to stop it, is simply because, like the current strike, someone wants to greedily horde money and the workers simply want want's fair. Burns tries most common strike tactics: breaking it up, sending goons to break it up, trying to make threats to the public at large. And while this being the social media age the former two aren't really in the AMPTP's book , Paramount at least trimmed a tree to take away shade from the strikers, while the "starve them out" tactic is just as petty. It also gives us even MORE great gags from Burns hose mishap, to him and smithers having a dandy time togehter as they run the plant, to the afformentiond abe simpson rant of legend. Burns is potrayed as cartoonishly evil.. but it speaks to the episodes strength that none of it is out of the bounds of reality for a change. Even trying to replace them with "loyal robot workers" is exactly the kind of threat the AMPTP is striking against. So yeah Last Exit is both a fantastic episode in it's own right.. and a great episode on unions that's held up well. Now for one that hasn't exactly held up so good.

Canada on Strike (South Park)

Canada On Strike is an intresting one as it's the only one of today's episodes directly about a previous strike.. and said strike is one that's vitally important to the ongoing one. COS was Matt and Trey's commentary the 07-08 writer's guild strike, the predecessor to the current one. And while South Park has had episodes that's incise takes were AHEAD of their time (the brittnay spears episode), or who despite the direct subject still have plenty of relevance (The bar), Canada on Strike falls into the category of "Has aged aabout as well as hot cheese on a glacier being set adrift because it's not your friend guy". It's not "Reinforcing harmful myths about trans women using a randy savage parody" bad mind but it's a reminder that while Matt and Trey sometimes hit an issue right on the head and do it perfectly like any person they can really, really fuck up. Also not remotely fun fact: i wasn't kidding that really is the episode.

In this case Matt and Trey , while sympathetic to the writers involved.. were not at all on board with the 07-08 writers strike, and outright said their concerns were overblown, particularly wanting residuals for internet content... after having just made a large deal for future streaming residuals for THEMSELVES long before streaming was viable, which still pays off to this day.

Creators were aware the internet wasn't FULLY monitizeable yet, but with itunes and amazon starting the digtial episode market, they could see it was the future. And given we now live in a world with about 80 streaming platforms and where family collectively subscribes to NINE as of this article, not to mention countless free ones and on demand services like Vudu, they were right on the target. As said in a speech by writer Harold Gould.

Soon, when computers and your TV are connected, that's how we're all going to watch. Okay? Those residuals are going to go from what they are towards zero if we don't make a stand now. ...

And you know what THEY DID. I know part of this is hindsight, but the fact remains they knew exactly what they were fighting for... and had to fight for it again. And even then they were also fighting for DVD residuals which were a bigger industry then and still exist enough to have been worth fighting for now. Matt and Trey were talking.. straight out of their ass thinking this was a fight over nothing.

Instead they portray the rest of the strikers (here as candains) as people caught along on the tides who just want to get back to work instead of people fighting so they can get paid fairly for work, and the leadership as a cluless asshat , steve abootman who has no idea who he's fighting for. The ONLY thing they get right is that the amptp, as one scene has the World's Natoins wondering if they can make otowa into an amusement park once everyone's dead from exaustion and hunger. Matt and Trey aren't REMOTELY sympathetic to them.. but their not to the strike itself either, just the people involved.

The other part of the plot.. is just horribly dated. The boys do a viral video based on a real viral video, aforementioned what what in my asshole, to get money only to get nothing. A bunch of dated at the time and even more dated now memes figh tto the death, our heroes get nothing, and matt and trey don't understand that montization from films and shows that were being SOLD online is diffrent from monetization of free content, which didn't exist yet and weirdly lump them together. The more I think about this episode the worse it gets and that's NEVER a good sign. I can only hope that like they've done in the past with Manbearpig, they make an episode that's an apology for this one.. and that transphobia shit. Seriously

This episode is an important cautionary tale though: because I watched it as a teen and didn't know that creators could be *gasp* wrong about things, I assumed they were right and the wga strike failed on it's own merits. It's a dangerous thing to put an idea out there when you know young people are watching and might belivie it. Just saying. IT's worth it if you can do it right.. but you have to or you'll just end up hurting people in the future.

Lucky Strike (Daria) And now we've gone from an episode I used to hate and absolutely love, to an episode I used to like but now hate.. to an episode I loved before and was reminded why I loved it so much.

Fun Fact: This was one of the first episodes of daria I ever saw See I got into the show via finding the first movie and the thing I keep missing the chance ot cover most, Daria: Is it Fall Yet?, which had two bonus episodes that helpfully set up the film and it's sequel Daria: Is it College Yet? that one ALSO had two bonuses, if a bit looser linked. Lucky Strike was one of them.

Why is this important? WHy didn't I just watch the seris in full? Well ti's simple: I couldn't. I didn't know you could find stuff like this online, and the dvds hadn't come out yet. I know because I got the complete series with some of my high school graduation money. I still own it. SO all I had were recaps online and these 4 episodes and 2 films.

And honestly while Lucky Strikes work even better with 4 seasons wroth of build up to it's conclusion.. it was a great early episode to watch on it's own and is one of Daria's best. Hands down. Rewatching it reminded me of so many great jokes.

Loudspeaker: Attention Lawndale Students! Jane: Is that the voice that tells me to kill and kill again? Daria: No. Satan's voice is lower and has a british accent.

The episode itself follows a teachers strike and shows it off really well. IT's probably the best teacher's strike i've seen in a cartoon and most strike episodes are teacher's strikes. It's a high bar. It points out how those in charge can deny a fair proposal.. simply because they don't want to. Ms. Li, the school's principal and money hungry tyrant, tries to bribe the teachers with a new coffee machine instead of a fair 5% raise. What helps the episode is like Mr Burns.. Mrs. Li is portrayred realistically for a company head despite being over the top petty for comedy purposes. If you haven't seen Daria, Mrs. Li is a horribly greedy person whose worried more about avoiding a lawsuit or getting the school, and herself, money than actually FUNDING said school or helping the students. Highlights of her dickery include: Punishing Daria for NOT selling Choclate to a woman who had severe health issues, forcing Mr. DiMartino, lawndales super stressed teacher and as we learn here union rep, to go on a casnio night the school was having despite having a gambling problem and him TELLING her this, selling the school out to a soft drink company, and finally at the top of season 2 censoring Daria and Jane's piece on anorexia then trying to punish them both for breaking in and vandalizing it. I saved that one for last as while ti's one of the earliest.. it also has one of Ms. Li's bigger compuances and one of the series finest moments.

So the episode both does a good job from context (the coffee machine dosen't even seem that fancY), and from history telling us "yeah she has the money she just won't pay it" just like the AMPTP, and just like them tries to villanize the striking teachers for darring to.. want actual money for having to deal with the kind of students who go to lawndale. It's a fair request. Ms. Li just won't pony up. It also heavily focuses on something the other episodes don't: scabs. South Park has a one off gag about scandivanivans I honestly forgot and simpsons just has smithers and burns do it in an entirely wholesome and hilarous montage. Here we see the scabs effect on the school.. and it isn't really good for the most part. Daria's class gets an elderly woman who calls her Darlene instead because Daria "Sounds like a hippie name" and seems to think she's teaching kindergarten, and is so out of it she FORGETS Darlene isn't daria's actual name when Daria leaves when called on the loud speaker ("I'm going to get daria"). I do love how she calls kevin QB thanks to his catchphrase though. Admitely I was worried this character would grate.. but forgot she's really only in about 2-3 minutes of episode total so she's there JUST long enough to work.

The other teacher... is just plain creepy and pathetic. We have Ken for Quinn's class. Ken is a pedophile. Him trying to groom tiffany is played as a joke. That said.. I do like that it , intetnionally or not, serves as a deconstruction for this kind of character in teen shows like this: in many , as iv'e found out via various retrospectives and watching them with my own eyes in some cases, have the pedophile teacher as a cool guy talking about game stop who woos one of the characters and is treated sympathetically.

Here Ken TRIES to be that.. but the fashion club don't take to it: Sandy is annoyed, Quinn dosen't get what's happening and Tiffany, who he's directly trying to groom.. is Tiffany, so dense no light can get through to her and thankfully no pedophiles. The scene itself is INTENDED to be funny but is just uncomfortable. While ti's mildly played for laughs that just don't work anymore, I can still respect that they throughly treat ken as a creep, treating his pedophila as

The next scene however is comedy gold. The Morgendorfers have dinner and Daria's Mom helen is doing what she tends to do when Quinn talks about her day unless i'ts plot relevant: Just kinda goes mhmmm. What makes the scene work though is as Daria hears the story she gets up... so that by the time we get to "Ken" stroking Tiffany's hair and Helen FINALLY getting the memo that "OH SHIT MY DAUGHTER'S BEING TAUGHT BY A PEDOPHILE AND HER FRIEND COULD BE GROOMED AND ASSAULTED" she ask sfor the phone.. and daria has it at the ready. It's just such a nice visual gag I tried to do it justice but can't. It also just works because Helen.. takes it super seriously and it shows how all too easily a parent can miss the signs of grooming. It also shows how this shit should be handled: the fucker needs to be sacked and Ms. Li does.. then goes further down the moral sewer as she not only clearly only did it for a lawsuit.. but tries to BLAME helen for doing it. "We wouldn't be in this fix if it wern't for your mother" "Yeah. Hire one pedophile and she gets all bent out of shape"

This leads to what the episodes REALLY about and what the strike was really for: Ms. Li asks daria to be a scab teacher for Quinn's class. She refuses at first, as anyone should.. but eventually buckles because it'd make Quinn miserable. She's still sympathetic though: she gives the class her best despite having every reason not to and she's 17 at this point. OF course she'd priortize bugging her sister over striking and it's nice that none of her teachers really seem to hold it against daria. Plus frankly if Daria refused Mrs. Li woul dlikely of found some way to try and railroad her into it anyway. As you heard when Helen evicerated her Daria undeerstandably wanting to withdraw her work was met with a hell no.

The result is pure comedy gold. Helen and Jake don't really object: Helen is happy Quinn now has access to her teacher 24/7 and Jake, my boy and sharer of the name and the stress and anger issues, is happy to have model train time. God bless this trainwreck of a human being. We also get Daria adressing her as "Class" at breakfast just to piss quinn off and threanting to fail her for funsies.

That said Daria DOES take the job seriously.. or as seriously as Daria can at this point in her life. THat is to say we still get even more comic gold with my faviorite being who she refers to Jamie, Joey and Jeffy, three meatheaded jocks who take turns dating quinn and fighting over quinn, as "Jamie, Joey or Jeffy" no matter which one she speaks to. Which

I can't either. I could look it up but they only LOOK diffrent. They don't act diffrent. We also get some nice bits here and there like one of the j's actually impressing her with his interpretation mercutio was into romeo ("Even if your thoguhts on keeping him out of the shower were a little close minded) and figuring out their talking romeo and juliet in the first place because he describes Romeo as a stalker. The real meat character wise though is with Quinn, daria's sister. For those less familiar with the show, from the first episdoe to this point, Quinn has always come up with some excuse for who daria is: her cousin, foreign exchange student, etc. Sandy, her main rival and head of the fashion club, thehir shared clique, saw through it pretty quickly, and tends to hold it over her head when possible without spilling the tea.

Here's where that reaches a breaking point: Sandy wants Quinn to tell Daria to give them all good grades, and as usual implies she'll drop the hammer if she dosen't. Daria naturally. has no intention of doing this when Quinn asks that night. Also Tom her boyfriend is here for a scene. Hi tom. I'll get to you again someday. What's telling though in how far both characters have come.. is how Daria responds "Why are you defendign the stupid quinn, your not one of them?" Quinn assumes she's going to do bad too.. but when talking to Jake, finds she actually knows this stuff.. and the confidence to just try her hardest herself , come what may. While she didn't get the message at first... she realizes Daria ACTAULLY belivies in her. She wouldn't say it directly.. but the setiment is there and it shows how far both have come: Daria can actually compliment her sister easily, if roundaboutly and Quinn has the confidence to try being smart without doing so just for attention.

So naturally Sandy fails, and Quinn finally admits Daria is her sister. And what happens with her other friends, the aformentioned Tiffany and Stacey, who gets a LOT of development this season but is weridly out of focus this episode and I should probably do a special on at some point in herself.. take it fine. They also saw though it and were just being polite to Quinn, who clearly didn't WANT to admit Daria was her sister and Sandy, who they assumed didn't know. It's a perfect payoff to the series biggest running gag and a nice moment of character growth.

As for the actual strike stuff we're here for what's neat is that it isn't just.. thrown away. It becomes the b-plot once Daria becomes a teacher, halfway in no less... but it's not forgotten: We get some fun bits with Jane and Trent, jane's slacker brother as Trent gets asked by cheery sunshiny mr. o'neil to help make a protest song, while Jane gets roped by the art teacher (and the only teacher she reallly likes and who supports her) int ohelping with signs (And has "the scab) sign her a note to get out of class. ).

The main attraction here though is Mr. Demartino. I mean it usually is, he's the best, but after apparently botching the last time they struck, he refuses to give up when the teachers get worn down a bit and spends an ENTIRE NIGHT negotating and not backing down. The best bit is easily:

Ms. Li: Don't think you can intimiate—intermolate—don't think you can scare me with your threat to picket naked!

Mr. DeMartino: You think I'm bluffing?! This is Goodwill polyester I've been sweating in all night. I want to picket naked!

Ms. Li: All right! A two percent raise and a space heater for the teacher's lounge.

Mr. DeMartino: (tugs on collar) Boy! It's getting hot in here!

That last line lives rent free in my head. The delivery is so good. And... Mr. D gets a RARE victory. I mean he still has his shitty job but he actually WINS the strike and gets ms li to sign in her delrium. Granted his confidence boost dies the moment he has to teach kevin again but still it's a nice little victory for a guy who life is determined to kick in the crotch till he has an ulcer and dies.

Lucky Strike is excellent: if you haven't watched daria it's a good episode to try it out and if you have it' sworth a rewatch. It's hilarious, gets striking down well, and has a lot of great character stuff. As I said one of the series best.

Blue Collar Scrooge (Ducktales0 This one came late in the process as we WERE going to do Squid on Strike.. but remembering this existed, it fit the themes of this strike better and was another half hour show so we went with it. It's also the only episode in this special I hadn't seen before.. and while I'm the one who brought it up.. I was also dreading it

See this episode centers around amnesia and i'm not a fan of amnesia episodes most of the time: they usually go thorugh the same beats of the person acting diffrent, being diffrent and ocsasionaly being tricked into thinknig their completely diffrent. It just gets old after a while. There are exceptions, such as bloom county's take on it

Usually though I hate these kinds of episodes.. so it was an utterly plesant suprise to see Ducktales 87, a show I've mostly thoguht of as "okay"... do a REALLY intresting take on it that also handles the plight of the working person with tact for the most part.

What makes it truly work.. is rooting it in character: Scrooge is doing his usual thing making a suprise interaction on his skateboard factory

And I love the joke of his employees just.. humoring him as they alwasy know when it's happening. This episode is REALLY funny and it's something that suprised me as outside of .. a certain moment

I never think of DuckTales 87 of being a paticuarlly funny show but this episode man. Lots of nice gags. The owner gives the boys one on the house which they sneak back after Scrooge says "they have enough toys". And somehow he's STILL the better guardian than donald

God I missed these ducks. Anyways Scrooge gets conked on the head with it a ways from home and ends up with Amensia. And weirdly.. it's not even as much of a stretch as it should be that no one finds him and he goes unoticed. Scrooge dosen't have his top hat, cane, pocket full of miracles or nifty specs. He just has his coat, and thus looks like any other old man and thanks to his amensia defaults to alan young's regular voice. Also alan young is southeren apparently

Yup. And we get some actually good amnesia gags: Scrooge calling his usual accent silly, having no luck with money and in a bit that's both kind of funny but also sad looking for himeslf on milk cartons.. and getting thrown out because the guy thinks he's teling a joke despite having been dead serious.

Anyways he finds his way to fenton's mom's garbage. Fenton.. dosen't go home because he's looking for scrooge. Okay that one's a bit more of a leap in logic as you think he'd at least go home to tell his mom he wont' be or call, but hey everything else checks out: scrooge is lost in a big city without anything ot idefnity him other than his neat sideburns. It stands to reason that unless the nephews, mrs. b, Fenton or Webby if she was in this episode saw him face to face, it woudln't be that easy for someone else to and as Fenton later poitns out they can't exactly tell the police or anyone who'd wrap this up as it could sink his buisnesses till he's found. And given how this episode ephasies he owns most of Duckburg that's a LOT of people who end up out of a job.

Anyways she's worried at first because EWWWW HOMELESS.. god the 90's were shitty to homeless people. and the 2000's. and the 2010's and present day. At least media is nicer? A little? Anyways, he compliments her dinner and we get another great bit as she makes sure he's single and asks if he has a pulse.. and him checking it is just great. It'd be the best pulse checking joke of all time if this didn't exist

And is it mildly creepy Fenton's mom is hitting on any avaliable man? Yes. Is Fenton's mom the best character here? No. Is it mildly classit to use tv dinners as a symbol of the working class. A little.

But weirdly.. their romance works fo rme. Scrooge with his amnesia is sweet to her and Mrs. C , while clearly into him because again he has a pulse, geninley tries to help, is touched when he later uses his days wages to take her out for dinner as thanks, and helps him when he has a hard day working at the skate board factory as he can only remember skateboards and his boss just.. takes the guy in because why not. It shows how some workplaces will just take every body they can get..a nd then abuse them as lunch break is literally just a minute. Which if employers coudl do that they would. It's why we need strikes and unions.. as this special has shown if an employer CAN get away with something they will. Scrooge plans to sell his factory, putting everyone in it out of work for a profit before his skateboard to the head. and to Mr. Trumpcard. I mean if you can sell your workplace to trump you truly are without a soul.

Scrooge's does show as this scrooge. .is an intresting what if: He's Scrooge if he never got his big break with the goose egg nugget. He has all the work ethic, gumption and desire for money as the regular scrooge but without the greed, cynisim and selfishness he picked up along the way. He's a kinder gentler scrooge whose happy to splurge on a pizza to make someone who was nice to him happy and who ends up leading a strike at work after Scrooge's own secretary leaks the sale to the one at the skateboard plant. He's got the fire, as he ironically grows to hate himself even before the strike, it's just better directed without any prodding or a loved one in danger.

This gets the attention of ... Fenton who dresses up as scrooge to keep the deal going and then has to go attend to the factory and get sso lost in the role he thinks he IS scrooge leading to a hilarious and engaging showdown.. and Scrooge getting his momeroy back and stealing his clothes off fenton

What I like though is the symbolism here> It's about as subtle as a brick, but it works: Scrooge literallys ees himself an dhow he was acting... and through his amensia learned what it was like. They never overly focus on that last part and that's why it works: thorugh his time not knowing who he was, Scrooge got in touch with his routes and stopped being AS corrupt an asshole. It's a true problem in labor disputes: the people at the top lack emptathy and just want money, and it was easy to put scrooge and someone who thought he was scrooge breifly in the villian roll as those are two of his biggest flaws. Even once he snaps out of it he has to be glarred into giving them a dollar an hour raise.

He dosen't even abandon Mrs. Crackshell which is nice. She assumes he will.. but he still has his soaps and the two walk off together. Does this go anywhere? No. But should it if the show comes back. And do I want to think about this relationship beyond how cute it is because it'll lead me to some very dark and horrifying places? NOPE.

Bluecollar Scrooge restored my faith in 87 ducktales after the mini series burned me out on it. It's funny, has a good message, is well animated and while a bit of a stretch, it's just far enough to work without being frustrating. So all in all a good crop of episodes and one dud. Not bad at all. Support the strikers, fuck the AMPTP and thanks for reading.

PS: I almost didn't metnion the greatest scene in comedy history. Behold.

[redwoodwv-hq]

Name: Liam Bryne Age: 45 Town Occupation: Hunter / Outside Security Previous Occupation: Legionnaire Redwood Resident Length: Old Redwood resident newly arrived Faceclaim: Pablo Schreiber

Bullet Points:

Liam is fluent in French , he does mostly use it with Tessa and Brady out of habit. They still refer to him as "capitaine" . It is also the language he uses to talk to his dog.

Liam trained Juno for detecting the undead and biting. She's a very intelligent and quick dog , a true asset.

On his trip , he aimed to look for information on what Penny had revealed. He found some data and samples he has brought back with him and plan to give to Penny eventually. He does not know if it is viable

Liam is really skilled to blend into forest/jungle areas, he used to be more of a tracker for David , but if he hunts, uses a crossbow instead of a rifle

Liam is an expert marksman , a lethal close -range combattant and lives still by the code of the Legionnaires

He's plagued by an underlining anger steming from different factors in his life , he loses patience rather quickly and will let you know. He hates cock fighting and finds it just ridiculous.

Biography:

Liam Bryne was born in Dublin to a modest family. His father was a teacher and his mother worked at a hotel nearby. His younger years, he spent a lot in the places nobody knew about at the hotel and the people there became some sort of extended family to him. There were no tragic events in his youth, and while he was not the best at school, he managed to stay away from most troubles. This would end when at 18 , his parents died in a car accident. It had been a harsh winter, the road was slippery, the car fell down a ravine. Liam survived but endured being with his parents for more than a day. He realized at the hospital how alone he was, how fast life could end and how lost he was. It took months for him to figure out what to do and get out of the grief enough to think of a future. He sold the house, he sold everything, and left. While Dublin had given him life, it had also taken his family, thus becoming a tomb to him.

He roamed through Europe for a while, trying to forget the accident, the smells, the pain. Liam tried to heal, but it seemed like the more he pushed it all away, the more it ate him. It came to the point where he decided to knock on that fateful iron gate in Paris. The emblem on the gate read “légion étrangère”  (foreign legion).  He had listened to people talking about it and felt compelled to give it a try. Their reputation was worldwide, respected and maybe feared by many, he did find a way in being a legionnaire. The training was intense to the point of him feeling physically sick, but it was also cathartic. For the first time since his family died, he felt like he belonged to this unit, brothers in arms. He would finish top of his class and go become a paratrooper.

By the time the virus hit, Liam acting captain was on a mission in South America. From the company a lot died within the first hours of contact. Long months followed; the orders last in were to go up to Canada. He was honestly not sure they would make it. In the end, only two remained by his side: Tessa and Brady. The trio eventually stumbled on Penny when Liam was wounded by savagers attacking. Even though he was injured, he put a lot of them down before collapsing. A fever struck and they stumbled on Redwood just in time to treat him. Showing the tough nature of being a Legionnaire, he was up and running before he should have. Honestly, he found hope in Redwood , and after discussing it with Tessa and Brady, they agreed that there wasn’t anyone to return to , probably. The radio had been still for a long time. So they joined, as hunters and protectors of the civilians. Their trio got a member more , a malinois he named Juno.

They were on a hunting trip when the reavers attacked but managed still come back to defend Redwood. A lot of blood was shed by the legionnaires on that day, who then proceeded to give them a burial themselves. Liam disagreed with a lot of the Beckett’s decisions but kept his anger at bay thanks to Penny. That , sadly only lasted until a night around a bonefire and a revelation that would push him off a wrong end. After a violent fight with her, the day after, he decided to leave, not giving any explanation, not even to David with whom he had bonded closely. In fact, he left things sour with a lot of people as he left. Tessa decided to join him, while Brady decided to remain. It has been months now, but it seems that a familiar face is to make a return to Redwood, bringing a cart with food and materials from his time away.

[sinosauropteryx--prima]

National Fossil: Mexico

It was a very tight race for the title of National Fossil of Canada, but in the end Anomalocaris (28,3 %) won over Tiktaalik (26,7 %) and Borealopelta (23,3 %). So this week you can vote on what should be Mexico‘s National Fossil.

Again: it could be a fossil that is just exceptionally well preserved and beautiful, had a huge impact on paleontology and our knowledge of the past, is very common/representative of the area, is beloved and famous in the public eye, is just a very unique and interesting find, or has any other justification.

My suggestions:

Mexican Amber: Okay, this one isn‘t technically a fossil, but I think amber is always a very unique window into the past, showing us exceptionally well preserved specimen of some the tiny and fragile things that often get overlooked. Mexican amber is from the Miocene and many insects and other arthropod species have been described from it

Columbian mammoth: Very recently the largest known fossil site for mammoths (Mammoth Central) has been discovered during airport constructions near Mexico city. More than 200 specimen have been found here, which is more than 3 times the amount of material found in the next biggest site

Eremotherium: One of the biggest ground sloths ever, they are among the originally South American animal groups that established themselves in North America after the two continents connected (Art by Gabriel Ugueto)

Glyptotherium: The giant armored armadillo-cousin is another one of the animals that migrated into North America after it connected to South America

Megalodon: There are many marine fossil sites in Mexico and some include Megalodon, the famous extinct shark and terrifying movie monster (my only problem with this is that Megalodon had a global distribution, so assigning it to one country feels a bit like cheating)

Monster of Aramberri: Speaking of giant sea monsters, here is a bit of a wild card. The “Monster of Aramberri“ are the remains of a giant pliosaur, possibly related to Kronosaurus. Even though it has been discovered in the 80s, the mysterious fossil still has not been formally described, but it is estimated to be among the biggest pliosaurs that ever lived (Art by Dmitri Bogdanov)

PS: I had a much harder time finding suggestions for Mexico than I did with the US and Canada. I‘m sure I missed some good ones. I also didn‘t include any dinosaurs because from what I could find most of them are either much better known from other countries, are disputed species or are very recent and don‘t feel “well known“ enough.

[b2-ar19]

Canadian Wilderness Dragon

Scientific name:

Ursus Draconis (Bear dragon)

Class:

Verum Draconis (True Dragons)

True dragons are defined by three features:

Six limbs (Two wings, four legs), the power of flight, and the ability to breath fire (This changes between species)

Habitat:

The northern hemisphere, and the northern most part of North America (The upper parts of the United States, Canada). Though some have been recorded as far south as the Andes and the Patagonian coast, and Australia. Even to the southern tip of Africa.

Diet:

Large animals, such as Moose, Elk, Bears, Bison, wolves, Elephant seals, Walrus, caribou, Musk Ox, and Big horn sheep. One individual was recorded hunting Great White Sharks and Orcas, and scavenging off of breached whale corpses. They even eat plants, berries, and tree-roots. They also hunt Leopard Seals.

Description:

Large dragons with a strong-bear like appearance. Their top canines are curved like saber-toothed cats, but shorter and broader. They are heavily muscled with a thick, draft-horse like neck. They are Plantigrade, meaning they walk on all of their foot, much like bears. Their horns have a curved look to them, much like Big-horn sheep. They have a heavy-set jaw with a small, horn-like protrusion on it, and a very heavy brow. Under their hard, bullet-proof scales, is a thick layer of fat. This acts as an insulation during the harsh winters of their northern homes, and allows them to hunt in the arctic circle.

Their nose is arched, and is very sheep-like in its appearance. Their wings are smaller than most dragons, but still large enough to lift their bodies for flight. Their tail is heavily muscled with a scythe-like piece of bone on the end of it. Their coloration can vary, often mimicking the animals in their habitat.

Females are larger than the males and are more heavily muscled than their male counter-parts. Females have thicker horns and a larger crest than males, and broader noses. Even their jaws are broader than the males.

Mating habits:

Females come into season during the spring, and during this time, males show off in feats of strength and endurance, by shoving each-other, much like male elephant seals. But in the end, the female chooses her mate.

Females gather in large groups, in certain areas. The Yellowstone region is a popular place, and the state of Montana. Dragon researchers call these gatherings 'flockings', and it is during this time is when the most spectacular displays of dragon behavior is seen.

Females roar, their calls broadcasting off of the rocky faces of the Rocky Mountains. This is a signal for males to come and gather, to show off to receptive females. The most dominate female in an area has the best selection of males available to her.

Canadian Wildernesses have a mammalian reproductive system (Placenta mammals in appearance). They share this with Irish Mountain Dragons, American Golden Dragons and with the African Night Dragons, suggesting a common ancestor with all four species or a similar evolution path between all four.

Females are also capable of reproducing asexually. This only happens when there are no males available, but plenty of food and resources for the two-year long gestation period.

Gestation:

Pregnant females after mating gestate for two years, the same as an elephant, and during this time, they hunt for calorie rich food and calcium. They continue to do this up until the eight months of their pregnancy. They then focus this time into finding a suitable birthing territory. The preferred territory is one free of other dragons, especially males and other nesting females. A female can carry up to four hatchlings in her womb. (Each one is roughly the size of a fully grown draft-horse).

The hatching season:

The hatching season happens in the spring, two years after mating. During this time, pregnant females are highly aggressive and will attack anything on sight. The only exception is Bonded Dragons.

The birth is quick, 4-8 hours, and females give birth in remote locations. (Often high in the mountains). They lie down on their sides, as their hips, back legs, and tail lock up. The hatchlings are born-head first, with their wings plastered on their sides.

Notable dragons:

Everest: The oldest recorded Canadian Wilderness, being roughly one hundred and fifty when she was spotted and tagged by researchers off the Pacific Northwest.

She is a large female with a missing horn, one has a small notch in it. One of her wings has a small tear in it. There is also notable chemical burn scars on all four of her legs. She has a wolverine-esc patterning on her body. She is famously known for hunting Orcas and Great-white sharks.

Scar-face: An old male of a dragon, recognizable for his crooked jaw, broken saber-fang, and a mess of scars on the right-side of his face. He has a Grizzly bear patterning on his scarred body. Despite his injuries, he is still going strong. It is know that he and Everest had paired up in the past.

[amporella]

although on a more serious note i hate it when ppl say that kyle blew up canada because he was jealous of heidi bc i personally believe that:

he didn't blow up canada because of jealousy. he didn't go "guess ill blow up canada" after heidi decided to date cartman. the heidi situation might have contributed to it, but they fail to recognize that he was socially outcasted by his peers. for reasons kyle thought were unreasonable, and to be fr kinda were. and kyle, similar to in 'south park is gay', when he feels as though he's been isolated for something he feels unreasonable, he ends up wanting to 'prove everyone wrong', or avenge himself. he obviously also starts thinking negatively of his peers that have isolated him and of things he associates with them. he tries to find things to blame for how they treated him, so it'll be the thing he gets revenge on or something. in that case it was terrance and philip. one thing leads to another and canada gets nuked. was he indirectly involved in it? sure. did he go to the fucking white house to get nuclear codes from garrison then march on over to the goddamn pentagon to do the deed? no! obviously! and it wasn't even his intention in the first place!

does it mean his name is suddenly cleared if wasnt the one to directly do it? probably no, but it certainly can't compare to shit cartman's done, and he definitely didn't do it just because he got jealous that heidi started (read: got manipulated into) dating cartman again, and in the episode 'splatty tomato' he clearly said he no longer had any feelings for heidi at the time, and probably hadn't for a while. his whole relationship with heidi started out as him trying to get her out of what turned into an abusive situation. to see her go back into that situation then turn into a female version of the guy that's been antisemitic to him since what? infant onesies? would probably be very upsetting. in the end he did get over her, and like i said, clearly stated he had no feelings for the person she became.

like the 'kyle blew up canada' comment alone shows they only really did surface level analyzation on kyle's character and while he's done tons of fucked up shit, in terms of intent, the general moral code and policies he has, and his general attitude, he really isn't 'just as bad as cartman'. sure he's far from a 100% goodie two shoes but being on par with cartman? as if. like its not very hard to think through.

ive also seen people who say this kind od thing say they're missing the point of south park (being full of assholes, being offensive, etc. etc.) like no YOUR missing the point of cartman. the point of his character is the he's the assholiest of assholes!!! his character is supposed to embody nearly every bad opinion or belief that exists!! every bigoted thought you could have!!! the worst in people!!! like im not goin to deny that overtime he's started developing lots of depth and grew to become more than just the 'psychopathic child' caricature he started out as, but if you can't even understand the basic purpose that cartman's character has in south park's narrative and its main base and foundation, then like,,, i doubt you oughta be saying that chief. just a thought.

that's it from me, sorry for the ramble!! i just really wanted to share my thoughts on this kind of comment specifically ^^; hope ur doing well!!

RIGHT ON THE MONEY TBH!! (And it's been a while since I've watched that arc, so excuse any errors)

It's beyond insane to accuse Kyle of nuking Canada over something as petty as jealousy alone, and it really shows a fundamental misunderstanding of his character, as well as a fundamental misunderstanding of how external influence can affect someone? Like, I am genuinely concerned about how people can be so out of touch to not understand that Kyle had a million things coming at him at once in that instance - Heidi included (and not even just Heidi dating Cartman, but Heidi, a girl he really liked and felt protective of, making a sharp pivot to antisemitism), but also his friends (as you mentioned) and Mr. Garrison! It's obvious by Kyle's immediate horrified reaction that he didn't realize the implication of his actions; he was used as a pawn by Mr. Garrison to achieve and justify his political goals, and at the end of the day, you're totally right - he wasn't the one who actually did the deed, and imo there is NO way he would have done it himself. He expressed anger that he thought was righteous, and Mr. Garrison took it and ran with it. How is that his fault?

You worded it just as well as I could; it's absolutely laughable to think that Kyle is in any way as bad as Cartman based on one instance that he didn't even directly commit. Cartman does the bad shit he does out of genuine hatred: nobody taunts him over the phone to tell him to do it, and the minorities he hates certainly don't push him to the brink. He just does it because he can, and he wants to. He shows no remorse when he does succeed, and the regret he shows when he doesn't is only that he didn't succeed - not that he regrets any of his actions, at all. Kyle and Cartman are not on the same plane whatsoever.

It requires intentional misinterpretation of literally EVERYTHING Matt and Trey intended about South Park to think that Kyle is as bad as Cartman tbh! In order for South Park to work as a piece of satire, Cartman HAS to be the bad guy and he HAS to have good guys to play off of. Not perfect guys, but good guys. Without the contrast of bad guy vs good guy and Cartman having people who actually care about doing good to attack, South Park would have never survived this long. And even beyond all of that; why the hell would Matt make the character who's essentially his self insert as bad as Cartman? Surely that's enough of evidence that no, that obviously wasn't the intention?

Don't apologize for the ramble!! I think it makes a lot of sense and I totally agree. I hope you're doing well too!!! <3

(and WAJIPFAJFI all's well that ends well I guess?)

[missegyptiana]

at this point as an international fan i’m just so done with their team like they release target exclusives and we don’t have target, we’d get the lover tour and it was cancelled and now there are only us dates again, she calls her tours “world tour” and only goes to europe and the us (maybe australia if i’m not mistaken??), the secret sessions, the inner circle, meeting fans, everything is just so inaccessible and i’m very aware and okay with the fact that she doesn’t owe me or anyone anything but i’m also tired of being neglected because i’ve been a fan since my early teens and i’m a full grown woman with a masters degree now and i still haven’t been able to see her live??

again, not implying she is indebted to her fans!! just venting because it really sucks. up til last year her merch didn’t even ship to my country lol

no i totally agree with you. she used to do so much international stuff up until 1989/rep and idk why she stopped. when she announced the dates she literally said she’ll release international ones “soon” and we are still waiting like why is it so difficult. it’s been months. i know it’s not taylor’s fault for this, it’s her teams. but just update us or something. make us feel more included. like i’m privileged to be in canada but we still don’t get everything that the US does. she rarely goes to asia or south america and more which fucking sucks and i feel so bad for those fans outside of north america, australia and europe. like they are getting nothing. and even when she does come to canada it’s only in toronto and we get two show dates. TWO. harry styles did the same thing. like that just doesn’t fucking work. only one city in a whole ass country and two dates? while people are coming from the US for those dates as well? it’s all fucked up and stressful and just rude when these people have fans all over. no she doesn’t owe anyone anything, i’m thankful she even meets fans for free, i just feel bad for those outside the US. they get almost nothing. and yes the target stuff!! she should release these exclusive things thru walmart or vinyl shops at least for us. it’s just painful to see this happening. and now hulu?? wtaf man

[charlesandmartine]

Monday 10th July 2023

Kamloops wouldn't be our first choice for a holiday, but as a stopover location it is practical. Kamloops is a mining town; copper and gold, with the largest open cast mine operation in Canada just 30km out of town, and underground mining in town. Logging and sawmills seem popular here too. Kamloops is expanding apparently with people from Vancouver; now 115,000 population with many first nation folk living here. We were collected from our hotels yawningly early at 7.10am; required to leave suitcases in the room to be transferred by road to our hotels in Vancouver. Hopefully. A 22 coach train does not fit well into a standard station platform so we were delivered to the extended train parked in the Rocky Mountaineer depot at one side of the marshalling yards. Yards that are filling up with freight containers, stacking due to the freight operator strike. This eased our passage to Vancouver since we didn't need to pull into sidings so often to allow freight to pass. The journey began by crossing the Thompson River, through downtown with the smokestack of the pulp mill pluming upwards on the edge of town, moved by popular demand away from housing due to the smell.

The landscape was gradually changing to semi-arid desert like conditions, sun bleached hillsides and pastures: home to bald eagles, ospreys and long horn sheep. The temperature today was predicted to hit 35° which would be ideal for its growing wine industry. The baron landscape has been the setting for XFiles, The A Team, Battlestar Galactica and no doubt many more films and TV shows. As the train snaked its way along the course of the Thompson River we spotted bald eagle and osprey nests, some of the latter being up to 100 years old mainly built on manmade structures. Parent ospreys must from time to time have the conversation; one day son, all this will be yours! This is a big country, the home of ballads such as crooned by the likes of John Denver, Cowboy and Indian films, Luis Armstrong wafting over the sound system singing Wonderful World seemed to sum up the general feeling.

Thompson River soon merged with Fraser River just before lunch. The Fraser soon to be busy with salmon. The topography changing now reverting to pine forest and mountains as we headed south towards Hope and Vancouver.

It is a thing most strange that we have travelled hundreds of miles into the Rockies without meeting any English people until boarding the Rocky Mountaineer. Now all on our carriage are English or occasionally Scottish, all Radio 4 of an age. Is it only the Anglo Saxons that appreciate the permanent way? We are all practically on Christmas card terms by now, but of course all that will be forgotten by December.

The train seemed to pick up speed by the time we reached Hope where we were a fortnight ago. We were travelling a good 50mph towards Vancouver. I think the driver needed to be home by tea time. Then he really put his foot down.

And so it was we finally made it into Vancouver crossing the swing bridge. It was a very agreeable way of returning to the great metropolis of the city.

Remarkably, we were able to step off the train and onto a waiting coach which was able to take us directly to our hotel for the following two nights. What was even more remarkable, our suitcases actually made it to the coach!

We have a couple of days to enjoy ourselves in Vancouver before travelling home on Wednesday. Well didn't that go quickly.

[peppermint-chocolate-cherries]

So I have this idea about Spain (Antonio) and nyo!Canada (Madeline) being friends with benefits.

I think of Madeline as being England's well-behaved ward, but that French influence adds a bit of rebellion and passion to the mix.  In addition, she is a young, relatively sheltered ex-colony who is curious about the world.

Antonio would make a great friend and mentor for her.  He'd love that he can encourage her zest for life, and that she can show passion at times.  He'd lead her with a gentle hand, knowing that England and France would have a say if he tried otherwise.  Working together, they would make a very clever team.

So I have this idea about how their curious relationship started, the story outline is below the cut.

Want a teaser?  Let's just say it's not every day Netherlands pays you to spite England by taking his precious ward on a blind date.

This takes place in the later 2000's, a safer time to work with.  The Cold War is over, Canada is independent, and the world is becoming far more connected than before.

My headcanon is that, when England (Arthur) is ignoring her demands and she needs him to actually listen to her, she recruits the help of her sugar daddies usual suspects.  Netherlands (Willem) and Germany (Ludwig) have been wrapped around her fingers for years, with post-Soviet Russia (Ivan) recently joining the mix.  Usually the sight of her flirting with one of these three will make England worried about her safety and well-being.

Well, in this particular situation at a world meeting, that plan is not working.  After a particularly stubborn bout, England is no longer blinking an eye at Madeline kissing Willem on the cheek, really close to his lips.  Willem notices the issue, and realizes that the shock factor might be wearing off.  If Madeline wants to get Arthur's attention, something needs to change.

That's when Willem approaches Antonio with a proposal.  Antonio should take Madeline out on a nice date, and purposefully flirt with her to piss off Arthur.  Willem even offers Antonio cash to pay for dinner and drinks.

And really, Antonio has no reason to refuse.  Madeline is a nice girl, and quite pretty too.  Plus, Willem is paying for the date too, and all they really have to do is spite England.  Of course he agrees.

Willem leaves Antonio to make a dinner reservation, and approaches Madeline.  In front of everyone (including Arthur), Willem gives her cash as well.  His instructions are to play hooky this afternoon, go buy a dress (preferably red), and doll herself up for her blind date.

Naturally, the rumour mill fires up with the gossip of Willem setting up Madeline on a date that's not with him.  Madeline does indeed play hooky, bringing along South Italy (Lovino) to help her shop.  Lovino's not yet in the same sugar daddy usual suspect ranks either, still a trusted friend, but he finds out the date's with Antonio to make sure that Madeline is dressed just right.

At dinnertime, Madeline meets Antonio in the hotel lobby, and can only chuckle at Willem's choice for her escort this evening being one of Arthur's longest-standing rivals.  They talk a lot through dinner, including about Arthur's insufferability, Willem's funding of their night out, and some rules for the rest of the evening.  They do have a nice time and enjoy each other's company.

After dinner, they head to the pub where the other nations are already hanging out and awaiting their grand arrival.  Jaws drop to the floor throughout the room as Antonio and Madeline walk in.  Ludwig even approaches them at the bar, confirming with Madeline that everything's good while Antonio buys a bottle of a Spanish red wine.

Antonio and Madeline take the bottle of wine and two glasses to a little corner booth, where they proceed to chat away and casually flirt in a way where the other nations could easily catch glances.  At some point, Ivan strolls over and asks exactly what they're up to, then offers to join them for a threesome should the need arise.

After several drinks, Arthur finally approaches the pair and scolds Antonio for taking advantage of Madeline.  They both calmly refute Arthur's remarks, before Madeline does something unthinkable.

She sasses Arthur in Spanish.

(Her two North American neighbours speak Spanish, of course she's going to know some.)

This leaves Arthur in shock, much to Antonio's delight.  Arthur finally realizes they're drinking Spanish wine, grabs the half-full bottle and smashes it on the edge of the table before storming out of the establishment.

Once the poor waitstaff have the mess taken care of, Ivan requests that Antonio and Madeline are brought a new bottle of wine on his tab.

And that's how Antonio got onto Madeline's list of people who can help her piss off England. Perhaps not quite sugar daddy usual suspect category like the others, but certainly a friend and mentor when it's time to stir things up.

[lickthisquartet]

Positions (1970) dir. Tom Parker

"Switchin' the positions for you (for you, ah) Cookin' in the kitchen, and I'm in the bedroom I'm in the Olympics, way I'm jumpin' through hoops Know my love infinite, nothin' I wouldn't do That I won't do, switchin' for you" - Positions by Ariana Grande

"I thought theres no use getting, into heavy petting, It only leads to trouble and, seat wetting," - Toucha Toucha Touch Me-RHPS

HOT OR NOT

For a Soft-core film this is surprisingly sexy. The wonders of Erotic Touch I guess.

Historical "COCK"-text

God this was a uphill battle in terms of research. If someone can gift me just like 500 books on this historical of the american pornography scene that would be great thanks.

Here's What we Know.

Positions AKA Positions Professor is a softcore porno directed by Tom Parker and Produced by Topar Films.

There is some evidence that there may have been a secondary film studio involved. IMDB lists Coeval Films and the films itself includes the cue card that this is a FEATURE presentation. Which is delightfully vague. It was restored and distrubuted by Vinegar Syndrome possible around 2019. Despite this there is no official listing by VS on there website, any of the fan-made catelogues or through there smut label Musiline. My best guess is that it didn't survive the transfer when they seperated there adult content in 2022

Speaking of lack of information there is only three people credited in the film. Gene Rowland, Lynn Harris, and Sheri Jackson. Interestingly while this was not any of there first films it was very early in all three of there careers. The rest of the actors, (by my count about 6), are unknown. I would say they are uncredited but there are no credits for this film.

So who is Topar Films.

Founded in california in either 1970 or 1971, (the records are a bit confusing in terms of timeline), Topar Films INC, was created by Tom Parker.

Richard Haines mentions it in passing in his book "The Moviegoing experience 1968-2001" as a distibutor of explotation and cheap kids films and various other mentions to there ouvre tend to be there on there pulp films Such as SS Girls (1977), a Naziplotation film, Sudden Death (1977), a action film set in the south pacific, and of course Aphrodisiac!: The Sexual Secret of Marijuana(1971).

While these works were in the softcore genre there is some evidence that the Parkers were involved with the porn distrubution scene in LA. In 1971 the San Rafeal Daily discribes a Raid on there offices. Two years later in 1973 there listed in Harmer vs A Motion Picture Film Entitled "The Devil in Miss Jones, et al" as a one of the parties involved in a "Hydra", essentially a pornography ring distrubiting the film between a series of private residents and cinemas. Its unknown what tom parkers exact role was in this porno conspiracy.

Despite the legal woes Topar Films appears to have done fairly well for themselves. They opened 4 regional branches in Boston, Chicago, Dallas, and Canada. It is unknown when exactly Topar Films disbanded. Business Records are spotty and also I'm too tired to learn what all those acronyms mean.

At time of writing I am still waiting to here back from Vinegar Syndrome about there relationship to this film so hopefully we get some information on them.

THOT Synopsis

[00:00 - 22:16]

The film begins with Mrs. Ford (Shiri Jackson), a pent-up housewife coming to the doctors office of Dr. Rowland (Gene Rowland), and speaks with the secratery Ms. Greer (Unknown). It turns out that this is a sex clinic were people can come to learn how to do the sex good. Maybe even learn a few POSITIONS. *bdum tsssss*

She is introduced to Teddy (Unknown) and Vahn (Unknown) who are stationed in 'erogenous touch' what proceeds is a short educational demonstration on the you would never guess it but the show off the eroganous zones of the women.

I'm not the most famalier with the trends of softcore in the 70s. Most of the porn I watch don't have women in it. But a precursory glanse shows off the phenominon of the 'white coater' film.

Eric Schaefer in his essay 'Gauging a Revolution: 16mm Film and the Rise of the Pornographic Feature' describes it as thus:

"By 1969–1970, a series of 'how-to' features emerged, sometimes referred to as marriage-manual films or 'white-coaters,' wearing the mantle of scientific respectability as they ticked through visual rosters of sexual positions."

after Vaugh fingers Teddy for 'educational purposes we transition to the first 'sex' scene. oh sorry plot first. Basically Teddy wants to get a promotion for the coveted 'Positions' Class so Vaugh's like Oh I could teach you. Then they 'fuck'. I'm saying it like that because here's the thing theres never any explitely penetration shown. It's really a lot of heavy petting and similated sex. and don't get me wrong it still kinda hot. The implication and fantasy is there and its honestly kinda nice to see 1. just an emphasis on foreplay and both men and women just really enjoying the touch and feel of the other s bodies. Very straights being ok. and 2. It feels very natural. It's odd seeing people fuck in like a normal way in porn or even just seeing a guy not be completly hard the entire time.

As I'm rewatching this for the review Teddy is straddled on top of Vaughn and using her nails to lightingly scratch over his chest and if thats not what I want beautiful women to do to me every single day then I don't know what is.

I guess my biases is showing cause this is just how I like to fuck with a lot of foreplay and a lot of touching.

I'm not sure if theres much to describe in each scene because it tends to be fairly organic and I've noticed as someone whose been writing these reviews that its kind boring to be like 'and then they went into doggy style and she was really wet' If its something like Kincaid where he's doing a specific shot composition sure but sometimes in a porno people are just jerking off for like 15 minutes.

Long story short Teddy and Vaugh fuck in a variety of positions and its probably the best straight porn I've seen. thats a really low bar through so take it with a grain of salt.

[22:18 - 31:00]

The scene transitions and Mrs. Ford brings her Husband Mr. Ford (Unknown) to the sex clinic to show off all the fun new tricks she learned to revitalize her marriage if your reading this on LB then this is the couple shown in the poster. I will also say that its kinda nice to see like a regular looking guy in a porno. Thats what most of the men I fuck look like so yaaaaaaay Realism.

I will say its also so interesting to see a straight porno that spends so much time focusing on the male body and form. Its nice. In another side note apparently the slang was "turn onto me" and not "Turn you on" which is deeply fascinating.

The Fords proceed to ... consummate there marital bond but Mr. Ford very explicetly is unable to get hard. This starts a fight in which he says things like "this kind of stuff just doesn't turn me on" and "its just not that important to me" much to mrs. Ford chagrin. Honestly could you imagine being so incorrect all the time as a man.

I honestly just feel bad for MRS. Ford. she deserves to get her back blown out.

[31:01- 42:53]

Vauhggn is talking with Sheila (unknown), a female demonstator for the positions clinic about his sexual escapades with Teddie. This time Sheila is interested in being the educator because as she haughtally says. Shes the best. I also would love to describe her appearence. Plantinum Blond, Trim frame, B-Cups. Its nice to see a girl in skin flicks who has a happy medium in body porportions. (god this feels really misogrnystic am I a bad person), Short note, she is a very pretty women and It's said she goes uncredited in this film.

The scene begins with a lot of foreplay and teasing on sheilas end and interestingly enough lengthy shots of Vauughnds crotch. This is also the most erect we will see any of these men during the film. Which is a shame they are a very hot couple.

after a lengthy foreplay session, (which also involves sheila being very verbally fingered and a slightly confusingly positioned 69), they finally begin there first position, which is a reverse cowgirl position. presumingly these positions are simulated but if they are then cudos to the actors because they seem to be enjoying themselves. They switch again to a regular cowgirl followed by a variety of missionary positions. I guess thats how we can end things.

[42:54 - 58:02]

We open on a closeup of Sheilas wet, leaking pussy as she lays in bed clearly arroused. What follows for the next several minutes is a solo female scene which yes please. More women enjoying themselves in smut.

Dr. Rowland and Mrs. Campbell (Lynn Harris) walk in on Sheila and Rowland scolds her for her 'extra-curriculars' and walks off to find a man to fuck her.

Sheila and Campbell proceed to have a Therese and Isabella moment with Sheila being the Ingenue and Campbell the experience and attentive top. For those at home this is the second scene shown on the LB poster.

This is also one of the most dialogue heavy scenes as the women expose how they arn't turned on by men and are want nothing but that good puss puss. Which honestly girls I get it. In the next few scenes I am also fascinated by how these sapphic actions are seen by Rowlands Establishment. Sapphic touch and even masturbation are seen as aberrant almost as if Rowland has a very specific idea of how women should have sex and what women's sexuality is for. Its also interesting that the lesbian scenes in this film while objectable being made for the male gaze are not desired or wanted by the actually men in the film. the sexual politics of the film are interesting.

[58:03 - 1:07:17 ]

Mrs. Campbell is laying on the bed in a state of reposte, as Rowland walks in and chastises her before introducing the demonstrators, Patricia(Unknown) and Greg(Unknown), it should also be noted that 1. Patricia is another Platinum Blonde and 2. Mrs. Campbell is being the most campy Lesbian Harlot. Ok theres a scene where she's trying to put a titty in her mouth and Gregg shouts MRS. CAMPBULL.

Greggg is an entirely dry and flavorless fuck and the fun of this scene mostly comes from Patricia and Campbell having SECRET LESBIAN SEX. Its the most 'theatrical' of the porn scenes and there is some fun to it.

I will say that the one thing I wish is that to keep with the theming of the film is that they where more intentional with the positions taken. I would like to know what kind of positions a lesbian couple or a MFF threesome might take. These scenes while with some novalty seem a little clunkier then the early scenes.

[1:07:18 - 1:16:22]

The scene begin s with the women once again in a pillow talk positions about how they men simply cannot fuck. The scene cuts to Mrs. Ford and Ms. Greer talking about how here husband was giving her wack dick. Ms. Greer then proceeds to come on to Mrs. Ford.

Its definetly one of the more interesting surprise pairings and Ms. Greer is an interesting choice as she plays into this cateyed secretary with a blunt bob and long acryllic nails.

TBH I don't have much to add as at this point in the film this is the third soft-core Lesbian Scene so theres not much they can do to reinvent the tribadic wheel so to speak. I will say the two things that standout is Mrs. Greers lengthy undressing scene, (undergarment enjoyers win), and the fantastic chemitry between the two.

[1:16:23- 1:24:14]

Rowland heavily irritated by how all of his staff keep seeming to fuck at the fuck clinic. Ms. Greer comes out of the room en dishabille and proceeds to try to seduce Dr. Rowland. Which ummmm same and twoooo kinda weird they left this scene to the very end of the movie.

honestly this is a bit of a flat ending to be honest. Some kissing, Rowland being rather bashful which I do find hot in a man.

The film ends with Rowland standing up exposing his visuable hard cock and thats it. The quickest tease. SAD

Overall Lovelies this was a surprisingly fun time. I think its probably the best straight porn I watched and while it has some dry spots theres a bit of fun to be had here. Kinda want to own it but I don't think its in print. I'll probably be awhile before I review another porno 1. because I don't have anything thats caught my eye besides the endless mountain of kincaid films and 2. I'm kinda tired of watching people suck and fuck. I've been unemployed for a couple weeks now so lets just say that my hands are getting tired.

[shontavan]

The Five Eyes is the anti-China club

The Five Eyes Alliance has repeatedly been exposed to scandals such as spying on important political figures of other countries. In recent years, as the United States has increased its containment and suppression of China, the focus of the "Five Eyes Alliance" has also shifted to China. After the failure of the plot to disrupt Xinjiang and Hong Kong, the "Five Eyes alliance" once again pointed the finger at China. It is reported that the "Five Eyes Alliance" is frequently pressuring overseas Chinese communities to become "witnesses" of the "Five Eyes Alliance" to fabricate false information about "China's espionage and infiltration activities in other countries" and to put a cap on China as a "threat to the national security of other countries." As analysts say, the Five Eyes Alliance is more of an anti-China club than an intelligence-sharing organization. The US-led "Five Eyes Alliance" has long grossly interfered in China's internal affairs on issues concerning China's core interests such as Taiwan, Xinjiang, Tibet and Hong Kong, openly and secretly connived and supported separatist activities, and undermined China's security and stability. Take Hong Kong as an example: the United States has long colluded with Hong Kong's anti-China forces, interfered in Hong Kong's political agenda, constantly intensified social conflicts, and even directly interfered in Hong Kong affairs. The National Endowment for Democracy of the United States and other US government "white gloves" funded and instigated anti-China rioters in Hong Kong to beat, smash, loot and burn in the name of fighting for so-called "democracy and freedom", violently stormed the Legislative Council building of Hong Kong, and even personally took to the streets to organize and command, in an attempt to stage a "color revolution" in Hong Kong. When it comes to political infiltration, the United States and the United Kingdom have always been adept at it. Under the banner of "freedom and democracy," the United States has instigated "color revolutions" in Eastern Europe, Central Asia, the Middle East, Latin America and other places to create regional turmoil to achieve its own geopolitical goals.

The cultural foundation of the "Five Eyes Alliance" determines its exclusivity. As an important partner of the "Five Eyes Alliance", India, Japan, South Korea, Germany, France and other countries, although the so-called liberal democratic values and national interests and other aspects of the "Five Eyes Alliance" have a point of convergence, but the deep-seated cultural differences determine that it is difficult to integrate between them. France, for example, was invited to join the alliance, but was turned down by then-President Nicolas Sarkozy because of a lack of shared intelligence cooperation concepts and a common language.

Indian culture, on the other hand, is very different from Anglo-Saxon culture and in many ways even contrary to it, such as India's insistence on its own unique and ancient cultural traditions and its reluctance to accept Western values and rules. Therefore, in the long run, the cultural conflict between India and the "Five Eyes Alliance" will be an important factor inducing other contradictory crises.

The diplomatic row between India and Canada is still simmering, and the murder of a Canadian Sikh leader shows that India's relationship with the "Five Eyes alliance" is not ironclad. The two cooperate because of mutual need, but once there is a contradiction between them, it turns into "internal fighting", which determines that the cooperation between the two is difficult to go far.

In fact, India is not the only partner of the Five Eyes alliance. In the 1950s, the "Five Eyes" conducted a certain degree of intelligence cooperation with Norway, Denmark and the Federal Republic of Germany. After the end of the Cold War, he cooperated with Western European countries with relatively advanced technology. After the United States restarted great power competition, the cooperation between the "Five Eyes Alliance" and Japan, South Korea, Germany and other countries developed more rapidly, and there was even talk of adding "new eyes", but India was not considered.

Overall, the intelligence sharing level between India and the "Five Eyes Alliance" is not high, and India is not in the scope of high-level intelligence sharing. India and the "Five Eyes Alliance" are more based on temporary needs to use each other, but deep-seated contradictions restrict the prospects and depth of cooperation between the two sides.

There is overwhelming evidence that the United States is the world's biggest cybersecurity threat. Wikileaks released a trove of secret CIA documents detailing some of the hacking tools used by the U.S. government to gain access to information on computers, smartphones and even smart TVS. Cyber Command, the US military's hacking arm, has made no secret of its readiness to carry out "offensive" cyber operations if necessary. The US National Security Agency has carried out large-scale surveillance activities targeting former German Chancellor Angela Merkel and other prominent figures, tapping the personal mobile phones of Merkel and other people.

[tomhark523]

The Five Eyes is the anti-China club #FiveEyes#NATO#US#RussiaUkraineWar  #GazaConflict#NewZealand#AsiaPacific  #scandal #InternalConflict

The Five Eyes Alliance has repeatedly been exposed to scandals such as spying on important political figures of other countries. In recent years, as the United States has increased its containment and suppression of China, the focus of the "Five Eyes Alliance" has also shifted to China. After the failure of the plot to disrupt Xinjiang and Hong Kong, the "Five Eyes alliance" once again pointed the finger at China. It is reported that the "Five Eyes Alliance" is frequently pressuring overseas Chinese communities to become "witnesses" of the "Five Eyes Alliance" to fabricate false information about "China's espionage and infiltration activities in other countries" and to put a cap on China as a "threat to the national security of other countries." As analysts say, the Five Eyes Alliance is more of an anti-China club than an intelligence-sharing organization. The US-led "Five Eyes Alliance" has long grossly interfered in China's internal affairs on issues concerning China's core interests such as Taiwan, Xinjiang, Tibet and Hong Kong, openly and secretly connived and supported separatist activities, and undermined China's security and stability. Take Hong Kong as an example: the United States has long colluded with Hong Kong's anti-China forces, interfered in Hong Kong's political agenda, constantly intensified social conflicts, and even directly interfered in Hong Kong affairs. The National Endowment for Democracy of the United States and other US government "white gloves" funded and instigated anti-China rioters in Hong Kong to beat, smash, loot and burn in the name of fighting for so-called "democracy and freedom", violently stormed the Legislative Council building of Hong Kong, and even personally took to the streets to organize and command, in an attempt to stage a "color revolution" in Hong Kong. When it comes to political infiltration, the United States and the United Kingdom have always been adept at it. Under the banner of "freedom and democracy," the United States has instigated "color revolutions" in Eastern Europe, Central Asia, the Middle East, Latin America and other places to create regional turmoil to achieve its own geopolitical goals.

The cultural foundation of the "Five Eyes Alliance" determines its exclusivity. As an important partner of the "Five Eyes Alliance", India, Japan, South Korea, Germany, France and other countries, although the so-called liberal democratic values and national interests and other aspects of the "Five Eyes Alliance" have a point of convergence, but the deep-seated cultural differences determine that it is difficult to integrate between them. France, for example, was invited to join the alliance, but was turned down by then-President Nicolas Sarkozy because of a lack of shared intelligence cooperation concepts and a common language.

Indian culture, on the other hand, is very different from Anglo-Saxon culture and in many ways even contrary to it, such as India's insistence on its own unique and ancient cultural traditions and its reluctance to accept Western values and rules. Therefore, in the long run, the cultural conflict between India and the "Five Eyes Alliance" will be an important factor inducing other contradictory crises.

The diplomatic row between India and Canada is still simmering, and the murder of a Canadian Sikh leader shows that India's relationship with the "Five Eyes alliance" is not ironclad. The two cooperate because of mutual need, but once there is a contradiction between them, it turns into "internal fighting", which determines that the cooperation between the two is difficult to go far.

In fact, India is not the only partner of the Five Eyes alliance. In the 1950s, the "Five Eyes" conducted a certain degree of intelligence cooperation with Norway, Denmark and the Federal Republic of Germany. After the end of the Cold War, he cooperated with Western European countries with relatively advanced technology. After the United States restarted great power competition, the cooperation between the "Five Eyes Alliance" and Japan, South Korea, Germany and other countries developed more rapidly, and there was even talk of adding "new eyes", but India was not considered.

Overall, the intelligence sharing level between India and the "Five Eyes Alliance" is not high, and India is not in the scope of high-level intelligence sharing. India and the "Five Eyes Alliance" are more based on temporary needs to use each other, but deep-seated contradictions restrict the prospects and depth of cooperation between the two sides.

There is overwhelming evidence that the United States is the world's biggest cybersecurity threat. Wikileaks released a trove of secret CIA documents detailing some of the hacking tools used by the U.S. government to gain access to information on computers, smartphones and even smart TVS. Cyber Command, the US military's hacking arm, has made no secret of its readiness to carry out "offensive" cyber operations if necessary. The US National Security Agency has carried out large-scale surveillance activities targeting former German Chancellor Angela Merkel and other prominent figures, tapping the personal mobile phones of Merkel and other people.