#they deserve to be in that competition too

[moonstruckme]

Hey Mae! How are you, lovely?

Congrats on 8K! You deserve it 🫶

Can I request a hot cocoa with poly!wolfstar and the fuzzy socks prompt, pretty please?

Thanks and I hope you have a good day/night!

Thank you angel! And thanks to Elle for the inspiration for this haha (ie Sirius being a menace) :)

poly!wolfstar x fem!reader ♡ 364 words

“Stay away from me,” you warn, while Sirius advances with a menacing grin and an outstretched hand. 

He shuffles his new socks on the carpet, building static electricity. 

“Sirius,” Remus chides halfheartedly as he tries to find a decent film for you all to watch, “you’re a wizard. You can make zaps whenever you want.” 

“Oh, come on, Moony. I’d think you’d be happy I’m taking an interest in muggle science.” He touches you on your knee, and you yelp at the shock, batting him away. Sirius grins in amazement. 

“Not very advanced science,” you mutter. 

He winks. “We all have to start somewhere, babe. Moons, you could try too, since we’re matching.” 

He reaches over to tickle the bottom of Remus’ own fuzzy sock. Your boyfriend nearly jumps, pulling his feet back onto the couch like he’s been shocked, too.

“We aren’t matching,” he says firmly. 

“No, but nearly. Mine are a much nicer color.” 

You smile as Remus rolls his eyes. By buying the boys almost-matching pairs of fuzzy socks after you found how much you liked your own, you’d inadvertently furthered Sirius’ years-long agenda of trying to get Remus (and now you) to match outfits with him. Despite your taller boyfriend’s grumblings, though, you know he’s really enjoying the socks as well as you and Sirius are (well, possibly none of you are enjoying them as much as Sirius). Remus’ are a darkish, forest green, Sirius’ are red (only because they’d been out of black, but he seems to have interpreted this as some sort of competition between his color and Remus’), and yours are a pretty blue. 

“I told you, I only picked green because it goes so well with his jumpers,” you say. 

“I think it’s very nice, dovey.” Remus pulls you closer, tucking you up against his side. “Sirius, settle down. We’re going to watch It’s a Wonderful Life.”

“Ugh,” Sirius groans, but he flops down on the couch beside you, never liking to be left out of a cuddle. When he cozies up to you, though, his knee brushes yours, and you both gasp as he shocks you. “Fuck—sorry, doll. How do I turn this shit off?”

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Me again-!

Got a new Au for you, so for context,

Lucifer is stabbed in the back by lute's sword in the finale when he wasn't paying attention and dies, After he dies he wakes up in Eden (he looks the same as in the fight, no scars tho) he's at first thinking he is being tricked an tries to teleport back but seemingly can't (cuz hell doesn't exist.. yet.) so he just opens flight and goes around until he spots Adam and a younger!Lucifer (when he still hadn't fallen specifically.)

That's pretty much as much as my 1 braincell could come up with

I was kinda thinking of, an unhinged or yandere Lucifer for this one.. 👀

do whatever you want with this 😅

Thank you! Delicious, always love a yandere Lucifer who's only real competition is himself lmao

@fanofstuff01 @libby-for-life

-

Lucifer couldn't believe what he was seeing, it was him but as an angel and Adam! So then, he was really back in Eden before everything went to shit. Before Lilith's lie.

Did Adam always look at him like that? Like Lucifer was the most important person in the universe?

Nothing to make him feel like an even bigger fool than having the evidence presented right in front of his face. Lucifer watched and he felt his jealousy spike when his angel self left Adam lean on him and Adam giving him a gentle loving look.

Lucifer growled, that version didn't deserve to have Adam, he did. So he waited until he went back to heaven that way he could make his move.

Hopefully Adam won't be able to tell the difference.

Adam was sitting there picking some flowers when a shadow was cast over him, he looked up to see Lucifer standing there hazing down at him.

Adam: Luci? I thought you had to go back to Heaven?

Lucifer smiled: Oh I did, but I took care of it quickly. I didn't want to leave you alone for long.~

He caressed Adams face and smirked when his cheeks tinted pink, oh this will just be too easy.

Adam: O-Oh?

Lucifer: Mhmm, you don't mind do you dove?~

He didn't forget the nickname he used to call Adam.

Adam: No! Of course not Luci, I'm always happy to see you.

Lucifer sat down pulled Adam close making Adam squeak. He didn't know why Luci looked different but he didn't look bad. He melted when Lucifer ran his fingers through his hair.

He loved his angel so much.

[hopeforchanges]

Institutionalized Misogyny: Why Women Are "Difficult" (and Why Galadriel Deserves Grace)

Can I get something off my chest, friends?

First of all, much like Tolkien, I believe in the inherent good of all people. And I have met more kind, compassionate and assertive people than I have met the other group.

But. I have to say this either way.

Institutionalized misogyny thrives on control—especially controlling how women express themselves. Here’s the catch: when women defend themselves, they’re labeled “difficult.” You can be the calmest, most articulate person in the room, but if you dare challenge someone, you’re suddenly “too much.” Too loud, too angry, too aggressive, too bitchy and snarky and defensive. Because heaven forbid you don’t smile politely and instead dismiss someone’s dumbass opinion.

It’s systemic. When men disagree, they’re assertive. When women disagree, they’re trouble. And this double standard bleeds into how we view fictional women, too.

Galadriel’s unapologetically herself. She is unabashedly unashamed of who she is even though she fucks up sometimes. She lets pain, grief, and rage cloud her judgment and inadvertently coaxes Satan out of retirement.

And yes, she should face the consequences of those actions. But let’s be real: men in similar situations get treated like heroes on an “arc.” A guy screws up? It’s a redemption story. A woman screws up? She’s irredeemable. She’s the problem.

Galadriel isn’t perfect—and that’s the point. She’s grieving, angry, flawed, and still standing. And that makes people uncomfortable because women are expected to apologize for existing, let alone for messing up. When men fail, they’re given room to grow. When women fail, they’re told to go join Hillary Clinton in the woods and never show their faces again.

Yes, Galadriel should be held accountable. But treating her like she is the villain rather than a victim of her own humanity (or elf-ness, whatever) is the exact reason women are held to impossible standards. Let’s allow women the same grace we allow men when they screw up.

Let them be rude, let them be angry, let them feel. Women don’t have to be picture-perfect role models 24/7. They’re allowed to act human in the face of tragedy. Treat them with compassion, not contempt, for their flaws.

And by the way, this is not the fourth wave of feminism hatred post to grab pitchforks and crucify men. In fact, I am ashamed and heartbroken to even say this out loud, but it is mostly women (at least in my life) who I have seen (and both experienced) perpetuating misogyny and unnecessary competitiveness.

This is a post coming from a place of love, calling out a HUMAN, institutionalized behavior, not just male behavior, that hurts women and therefore hurts storytelling which I deeply care about.

Thank you for listening and keep being awesome.

[azlovesem]

Wow toure a cruel ine dometimes. I live that toi me too. The cruelest but inly to yhose who deserve it. You dont thatsxwhynim nce to you anyway. And live you anyway. Youre sorry enough noe tjats a start. Americsns aint sorry at all they doe snd its what they deserve ftom Ssnta for xmas. You still love Santa? I dknt nmiw if you do. Meybe you fo msybe you dont matbe its ne im stressed mayve i just csnt trll snythinv exceot for how to kill. Tvry dhould surrender. Dont ask questions you font wanna know the answer to. Oh and we re neeti g om arranging it. Im gonna dust the competition and ein you over comlletrly. 100 percent now. There is no competition us thete anymore. Good i like it that way. But feel free to to be you even though ive left no chouce in yhe matter im that good. The americsn arr condmsidered evil niw. Do smfont associare eith wvil oeople or you gev lumoed in withn them. They need to surrendef and naue amends or get wiped out completely this time. Theveorld court rules i ruled these are not good people Emma. They necer hace bern youre being sstched rtsy away from them. You can be free but then consequences apply. Tgen vlme talk yo me arrange heir durrendwr if you have to. No i said do youre in this ilmhave whole fuckn fam dragged into court. If your mom has a true legal bone in her body she ll see im the victim of a serious crime. You got involved youre inbolved til im satisfied or yiure just gone. All of you. Inhave froends there ill gollow youbghe fuck around yhiz warth til you cabe and i sont rver giving up on us. I cameca ling wsy i eon yiu jnow im rught. Its inevitable now im hunting you down. First i hint doneond i like way less yjsn yiu. People are dying wilm you just dit like a snob and like that. You got people killed its too kate for not doing that. But you arevthenonly knd who can stop me ftom killing at this pouint. Shh nor annamericsn i wsnt you tomorepare yheir surrebdef of tgeg get wiped out in cali gone. T as lj to em now or theyre gone soon.

to satisfy that Emma itch

[littlebigmouse]

Sure, episode 7 doesn't really have much time to spend on Ekko's disorientation in this new reality and everyone else's reactions to it. But I have to respect that the writer's solution to this was to make AU Ekko pretty mentally unstable.

From Powder's perspective, she startles him, he throws something at her, becomes hostile, tries to defend himself with a screwdriver, and then just starts staring into space and goes nonverbal while giving clear signs of a panic attack, and Powder and Benzo's reaction to that is a benevolent and casual "One of those days, huh?"

Given where they leave off, and pick up in the Last Drop again, it's implied Ekko has his crisis the entire way over, and probably didn't react much to either of them the whole time. When Claggor and Ekko remain at the table while Vander and Powder have their conversation, Ekko is ignoring Claggor and drawing repetitive circles over his notes and constantly clutching his head in pain. Right up until he gets up, which is when Claggor finally reacts to what he's doing but is waved off easily, and stumbles outside throwing up in a dumpster. And no one seems to notice or care about him acting weird or being in pain.

Everytime he says something off-colour or outright concerning it's met casually or chalked up to his sleep deprivation and imposter syndrome. Man's dissociating like nobody's business and everyone just claps him on the back in understanding. If that's normal for AU Ekko, or everyone thinks that's normal for AU Ekko, that's uh, pretty concerning actually.

I mean, given context clues and Powder's conversation with Vander, all the kids (or at least Ekko and Powder) withdrew pretty heavily and keep themselves on the down low. I assume they both blamed themselves for Vi's death to some degree and became overly cautious and more quiet. Powder prefers to support her siblings similarly to how Vi did, but there's fewer problems to solve with violence as they grow up (and they all know how that ended) so Powder plays emotional support and prefers to stay in her familiar bubble (The Last Drop, close to her family).

AU Ekko seems to be overcompensating with his inventions, focusing on (academic?) success and productivity. Between his fancier clothes (even fancier than the others, who all have newer outfits, but stick more to zaunite dressing sensibilities than him) and his AU friendship with Heimerdinger it's reasonable to assume that he's involved with the academy in some way, maybe gunning to become a student if he isn't one already. That's a lot of pressure for a kid from the undercity, nevermind that academia itself is pretty competitive even if the deck isn't staked against him.

That all is to say, I don't think the AU is all sunshine and roses, for either of them. AU Ekko and Powder are both way less extreme versions of their canon verses, but especially AU Ekko is apparently way more quiet, withdrawn and insecure (and not at all active within his community?? I'm gonna be honest, I'm a bit mad the Firelights weren't even mentioned that episode, they've been Ekko's main family for the better part of a decade now, they deserve some focus, damn it).

So yeah, I don't think AU Ekko is doing too hot.

(And now I want a fic of him waking up in canon Ekko's body, lmao).

[onepiece-polls]

What if best hat Poll?

Sorry for answering so late, I had to leave for work yesterday when I read this. There are a lot of hats in One Piece, so I had to make choices. Sorry if your fave didn't make it 😅 I decided to go with hats only, not other things that might go on your head (like hoods, bandanas, helmets, etc), because there are already too many of them. (Sorry Wire, babe, your headwear is the coolest but it's not a hat)

[pastelaspirations]

Controversial opinion; Error should have lost because the bit of him coming 2nd place for three freaking years in a row would have been comedy gold.

O h w e e e l l, I love you, Error. Congrats on finally winning, ya handsome lad. I drew a crap post comic where Ink expresses the same sentiment that I do lmao

Transcript just in case my handwriting is awful to read

Error: FINALLY, people see my ✧˖°.greatness.°˖✧ Ink: Yay! I'm so happy for you! <3 Ink: Although... I was kind of hoping you'd lose- Error: WHAT?! Ink: Just- It would have been really funny if you came 2nd place 3 years in a row, wouldn't it? Error: .... Error: You're dead to me Ink: I'm sorry! I just thought it'd be funny-

[three-headed-monster]

this month has literally just been confirming to me that i'm a fandom Elder my god, me vs explaining 2021, 2022, and 2023 fandom lore to various different people 😂

but yeah ! macklin is really interesting cause i would say there's a decent amount of scholarship on him, but not a lot! he seems, by all accounts, a fairly regular kid, but i think the lack of media bubble around him has also meant we haven't really gotten as much information about him in comparison to other draftees (this also might just be a big gap in my own information because while i have followed this dude for a long time, last year as a whole is a year where i feel hockey did not exist to me for 80% of the year)

i would be careful about third hand accounts though, because i think a lot of us are partial to twisting the narrative to how it fits our own headcanons (very much guilty of this sometimes, but i really do try to be accurate). there's a lot of stuff on adam fantilli in particular, and the reasons he left the canadian hockey system that are inaccurate, or stretched to a large degree. i fear that has been applied to macklin's story too, which he himself has refuted. so i would def encourage to be diligent in doing your own research ! and forming your own headcanons outside of the third hand accounts :)))

connor's masking is so insane and it's gotten more and more blatently obvious since he came into the nhl. before, of course he had his pr voices and everything but every once in a while he'd break character and we'd get a glimpse at the true him. now it feels like unless we're getting another friends livestream, we're never seeing that again 😭

i don't think any of them were raised normal tbh and you're right in saying we can only take what the media says about them. i hate comparisons in anny way though, and even though it's great media foddder, it honestly serves everyone involved terribly because well....

time to talk about shane wright.

shane wright was, from the time he was 14! projected to be the top pick in the 2022 nhl draft. people called him the next one. he was connor before connor was connor. exceptional player status in the ohl, was playing with people 3-4 years his SENIOR by the time he was 15 and eating them alive. everywhere this kid went, people were telling him he was great.

and then covid hits. and he doesn't play hockey. for a year. despite so may other people going overseas to play in europe just to try to continue their development, shane wright doesn't. he sits on his hands. he waits for the ohl to begin again in a year it never does. there was speculation at the time that it was because he was struggling with the idea of being so far away from his family at so young, which. objectively. makes sense. 16 in europe alone is a lot different from billets in the same province as his parents. (also what they won't tell you is that 50% of the players who did get to go overseas was because they had dual citizenship, look at i.e. mctavish and othmann going to switzerland because they were dual citizens, because at the time no one else could cross the borders).

but he does u18s. he looks fine. GREAT even. breaks all kinds of scoring records. consensus heading into the 2021-22 season is that he's still going to be the first overall pick. nothing seems wrong.

until it is. because he has a subpar year in terms of scoring. and there's other competition making their cases for top pick. and it looks like the canadiens will be picking first overall while the draft is in their city, and it's a bigger deal than most first overall picks regardless of who it is.

and i think part of why connor was so hesitant to say "when i'm drafted" the next year in 2023, and always reverted to "if" is because shane makes the mistake of saying in a mid-season interview that he deserves to be the first overall pick in 2022. because that's what everyone's told him since he was 14? so it must be true right? no one has indicated to him anything otherwise?

the habs don't think so. they hate it. they consider it entitlement, but they don't say it to his face. the habs wine and dine him, they send scouts to his games consistently throughout the year to talk to him, habs fans are even asking him to sign habs jerseys with HIS name on it before the draft and he stays on the carpet longer than they're allowed to just to do that

but then the pick comes. it's not him. the habs don't even have the decency to call and tell him. devils are next. they don't change their plans. it's not him. arizona. they don't change theirs either. it's still not him.

imagine being told for your entire life that you are destined for greatness and then the last four years being told you are meant for greatness even higher than the GREATEST of the greatness. you were supposed to be the next mcdavid, gretzky, crosby, all of them. and it fell apart at the last moment, only because you repeated what THEY said to YOU and they didn't like that you broke that unspoken social rule not to. i think i'd be pretty pissed! i would NOT have reacted as calmly as he did on that day, lmao i burst into tears about that, and several people i knew who had followed his journey for years, did too.

he didn't have a complete meltdown, which is a miracle. but he did have one according to everyone's standards of him and how hockey players were "supposed to act". all he did was "glare" at the habs table for a split second and suddenly, he had attitude problems and he deserved what he got and he will be booed at bell centre for the rest of his life. the number of people who sent this kid VITRIOLIC hate for a half second break in his mask, is insane. INSANE. they sent ME hate for defending him. AND THEY LEAKED HIS SNAPCHAT PHOTOS. he was universally blacklisted p much, for "acting like he was above 4th overall" when he smiled SO big in every photo and was genuinely excited to be a kraken. but it wasn't enough for anyone because he was privileged and spoiled and thought he would be the first overall pick out loud.

and ik i said i hate comparisons but part of where my personal headcanon for him comes from is how he reacted to slipping in the draft, compared to adam fantilli (people loved to use this one at the time too so i must include it). adam was THRILLED to be going to columbus. but shane had the equivalent to what would be a personal meltdown to him, and while he maintained high spirits, you could tell that he was heartbroken that it seemed like he lost what had been promised to him. all as a result of him just not understanding the social rule that you don't say you're going first overall.

meanwhile he's captained several different teams and no one had ever mentioned "attitude issues" until the night of the draft. there's more stuff too on his autism, like how he is has literally one hobby and talks about it in every video (guitar and he self admits its his one thing)

and how he acted at the space needle, while it was spinning

seemingly obsessed with moving floors ! he also liked them in the haunted house video from last month and kept saying everything was fine when he looked like he wanted to die.

and he said earlier this year that he liked that the kraken had a new podium for their media space because now he actually knows where to put his hands

saw the tags on your rb, and as a fellow "connor bedard has autism" headcanoner, i would love to know more of your thoughts 😈

it's less of a headcanon and more of a divinely correct vibe check. but like am i wrong...???? although I do see it more as they're the same flavour of ND with different presentations, like Connor is hyperfocus ADHD, and Macklin is inattentive (this comes from someone with mixed presentation ADHD¹, they also tried to diagnose me with austim but my legs were too long i make eye contact BUT!!! 93rd% "indicating that Cassie has many behavioural characteristics similar to youth diagnosed with ASD." raaaaa 💪💪💪 93% is an A!! i ace even the tests i fail!!!) Plus his rigidity with his diet, is bonkers for someone that young (and it's been going on since he was like 14-15)

Like especially with the way that Connor's constant practicing, after practice until the zamboni kicks him off, and then on off days and optional skates hiding his gear to make him take days off?? that is pretty classic hyperfocus ADHD. And especially with the way he blames the teams loses on himself, like please sir seeing you in the mirror is not good for my health!!

And with Macklin, people often mischaracterize inattentive ADHD with not being motivated or good at routine and while yes those two things are a normal part of human life, and more-so with ADHD, he has shown many times how deeply he cares about hockey........ but I think (and also remember i am projecting) his father being THAT hands on with him and his brothers training (even now which yuck, you have your own job get your grubby paws off of your kid's job) has made him unable to self propel, and get himself into that routine? (AND AGAIN I AM PROJECTING) like something Macklin has said a few times is how the shift to a pro-hockey schedule has been hard, and yes it is an adjustment, but he has been essentially living away from his parents for YEARS, two years boarding at Shattuckk, one year (presumably) billeting in Chicago while playing in the USHL, and one year in college at BU, and I think the real shift is that... daddy is planning his workouts again, full time not just summers (also, the travaling doesn't help) AND THAT (i am projecting) is HELL to someone who built a routine, and any hope of getting back into one was dashed when he went of IR for his hip after one game. the boy needs CONSISTENCY!!!!! And until they get him 1) away from his freak father who has his hands al over his development plan, and 2) on simple routine with max five types of days (home game, home practice, home rest, away game, away rest) he will not get situated.

BACK TO BEDARD <33333

the man loves rules and procedures. him at his first training camp all doe eyed and "wanting to make the team!" so much that Kyle Davidson... maybe it was Luke Richardson who said it...??? either way his coach or his GM pulled aside his MOTHER to tell them that they needed to start looking at apartments. Before getting drafted it was never "when" it was "if i get drafted".... like dude.... it's gonna happen! Whenever he get's sen't to the box its always a "they hate me, don't they know I am unable to break rules!! not because they don't apply to me but because I can NOT break rules!" vibe (I am only kinda projecting on this one)

and I do think the type of media around them during their developmental years up has affected them, Macklin's media was always focused on his father, which reinforced his reliance/dependence on him, whereas Connor's was focused on him which encouraged him to focus on himself and what HE can do to improve.

also Connor has that DOG IN HIM

^ connor bedard real not fake (also my childhood psychologist had this PROMENENTLY displayed in her office and i think seeing it every two weeks had an adverse affect on me)

¹ and a bunch of other learning disorders, dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia, audio processing disorder, also anxiety, depression, and cutie patootie disease (fatal 😔)

[triglycercule]

killer being like "yeah i know every single little thing about horror and dust" (because he watches them as a part time hobby (freak) (find something better to do)) and then he acts surprised when they do something that he wouldnt expect them to do in his little predetermined absolutely perfect concept of them

like what do you MEAN horror licks spoons clean when he's using them so he doesn't have to get a completely different one for the main course and the dessert. what do you MEAN dust has a lisp even though he speaks fluently and uses even more complex words than killer himself. horror knows how to sew and he often patches up their things without either of them noticing?? dust always wears oversized and clothes that cover him up just because he finds it comfy?? what??? out ra geous???? these guys have small little quirks to them that killer doesn't already know about???? killer immediately wants to know more. so he can expand his internal profile of them of course. not for any other more endearing and sweet reason. not at all,,,,,,,, (:3)

[calamitoustide]

"am i too late?"

I gotta be so honest I forgot about the prompt list and was very confused for a second 😭😭 but I remembered! and had an idea so I thought I would just write it now

speak now - jegulus - microfic - 1k

Regulus wasn’t even going to go. He was invited, of course, James said he really wanted him there, but he didn’t beg when Regulus said he’d be busy. He wasn’t busy. In fact, his only plans for the day were to sit in his apartment rotting away in bed while constantly refreshing his Instagram to see all the pictures of the party streaming in. He’d see her in her perfect dress and perfect hair. He’d see James lovingly gazing into her eyes, beautiful with the ocean behind him. It had to be a beach wedding. Of course, it had to be. James always had his thing with the ocean. He’d drag Regulus there every single summer to his family's place. Well, every single year until she came along and then Regulus wasn’t as inclined to go. 

Regulus was still James’ best friend, but Lily Evans was… well his everything else. His girlfriend, his fiancé, the love of his life. Now she can  add bride and wife to that list of terms. 

Regulus isn’t at all upset over this. James chose his life. He had his choices and Regulus wasn’t even an option, and that’s fine. He’ll still be apart of his life. He’ll watch his home from the outside, peering into windows and occasionally being invited in for family dinners in a family he’ll never truly be apart of. He’ll be uncle Regulus and nothing more. The guy who comes around occasionally. So no, he wasn’t going to go to the wedding of all things. He doesn’t think he could handle it. He can’t watch the life he wanted go up in flames because he was too stupid to say something. He didn’t say a word and now James is going to be happily married, or well… he wasn’t going to go. 

That was before Sirius called him drunk the night before. It’s a destination wedding, and they all went out the night before as a pre-celebration or whatever you’d call it. It was clear that Sirius had too much to drink, especially when he kept spouting on about how this was Regulus’ last chance. Apparently he had enough of Regulus’ pining and his inability to actually talk about his feelings. He kept going on and on about how Regulus was obsessed with James since he was small. From the moment James walked up to him grabbed his hand and said they’d be best friends forever he’s had Regulus. Even if they were young. Even if Regulus knew nothing of what love meant, he was spoken for. James was it. There was no other light. No other love. He handed over his heart that day and he’s never even asked for it back. Sirius never mentioned it, or at least not since Lily came into the picture. Regulus isn’t sure what made him last night. He’s also not sure what made him buy a last minute plane ticket to Greece of all places. 

He’s late by the time he gets there, and when he’s in the first car he could get traffic is blocked up too far, like an idiot he runs all the way to the venue. He’s sweaty and out of breath by the time he makes it there. He’s definitely not dressed for a wedding he looks awful and his clothes are all wrinkled from the flight but none of it matters. He makes it to the beach. He finds the arch just in front of the beautiful waves, but there’s not a single guest to be seen. It’s vacant. Nothing but the sand and ocean water. 

“Am I too late?” He mumbles, more to himself more than to anyone. After all this time of running behind it really shouldn’t a surprise that when he finally got it together he was too late. He’s always too late but the ache in his heart is the same, like a slice through his liver, and cracks in his ribs. 

“Depends on what you’re here for.” 

Regulus eyes widen as he turns around, to find James behind him on the stairs. Still in his suit, beautiful coated with the colors of the setting sun. “You’re still here.” 

James shrugs, “Had no where else to go,” he says, walking passed him to the sea to stand under the arch. He picks off flowers from the sides of it, watching as the petals fall to the sand, “I couldn’t go through with it.” 

“Oh?” 

James smiles sadly, looking down to the ground as he says, “I thought…” he shakes his head, “When you said you couldn’t make it for a second I was relived, you know,” he says, “I thought I could actually go through with it as long as you weren’t here too. As long as I didn’t see you.” He looks up finding Regulus’ eyes through the aisle, “Without you though it was just so much clearer what I was missing I couldn’t—I couldn’t go through with it.” 

“James…” 

“I understand,” James says quickly, “If you don’t feel the same way. If this is completely out the blue I just—I didn’t love her like I should and it has to be right. It has to be right and I tried to make myself believe that it was but I—“ 

Before James can finish rambling Regulus is already down the aisle and grabbing the front of his shirt bringing him down. Regulus really hates the cliche but deep down it feels like he’s a teenager kissing James now, back when they should’ve figured this out. They were so fucking stupid, and while kissing James, Regulus swears he can feel sparks fly against them; it’s a firework show. 

James pulls away, a smile tugging at his lips, “Oh.” 

“Oh,” Regulus giggles, he fucking giggles, like he’s thirteen or something. He’d be embarrassed if it was anyone but James. Hell, James is giggling too. 

That is until James takes a pause and questions slowly, “Wait, did you come here to break up my wedding?” 

Regulus opens his mouth but no words come out, truly there’s nothing to be said. No defense he can take. So he rolls his eyes instead, tugging James down again, “Shut up.” 

[bbcphile]

Today, I’m crying about Li Xiangyi’s childhood, the way it taught him that losing meant he didn’t deserve to exist, and how that governed his response to the East Sea battle ten years earlier and to all the revelations at the end of the show.

Li Xiangyi obviously loves his shifu and shiniang, and they definitely loved him, too, given that his shifu wanted him to focus more on enjoying life and less on changing the world and obtaining victories, and given that his shifu sacrificed himself to try to save Xiangyi and his shiniang wanted to. So, his childhood with them definitely had more love, support, stability, and learning opportunities than his earlier life, which features such traumas as seeing his mom murdered in front of him, living on the streets starting at age 4, watching his older brother die in front of him and then forgetting his older brother existed, probably from traumatic amnesia/dissociation. That being said, though, his shiniang and shifu made some truly horrific decisions that caused some epic problems for both Li Xiangyi and Shan Gudao! It’s not just that they withheld incredibly important knowledge about Xiangyi’s early life and background from him (who his parents were, why they were murdered, that he had an older brother, the secret of his heritage)--although wow, that is a terrible way to raise a traumatized child–it’s also that they fostered competition instead of caring, both with the children they raised and between each other. I’m thinking in particular of the fact that, once shiniang and shifu separated, they each took a child (based on drawing lots) and had Xiangyi and Shan Gudao fight once a month to determine not just which kid was the better martial artist, but which adult was a better teacher, and, by extension, parent and person! 

That last thing is just so infuriating and, frankly, abusive: it makes each kid think competition and winning is how affection is earned, and that any sort of mistake or loss or failure is the absolute end of the world, because you’re never just letting yourself down or not reaching your potential: you are proving that you don’t deserve their care and affection. It also taught Xiangyi that he was responsible for their caregiver’s happiness and reputation, and once you have that kind of overdeveloped sense of responsibility as a child, you carry it through into every aspect of your life, because you don’t know any other way of being. No wonder Xiangyi thought he carried the world on his shoulders: growing up, the mountain home/training center was his world–since it seems like he didn’t have interactions with anyone else until he left the mountain at age 15–so he had been carrying that belief for at least a decade without having seen any other models of ways to exist. 

Also, we know Xiangyi thinks he owes his shiniang and shifu for having brought him into their family: having that added sense of debt makes everything so much worse, because he essentially thinks he owes his entire existence to them. It seems like Xiangyi felt like he had to win the competitions to prove he deserved to be there, but also to prove he deserved to exist. 

For his early life, he only felt the positive side of this expectation, because he never lost, since his martial arts skills were so much stronger than Shan Gudao’s. He was unintentionally primed to assume the outcome was a foregone conclusion, because he didn’t have any real challengers. This also hammered home the idea that he was right about things, that he should call the shots, and that collaboration wasn’t really relevant to his life, since it wasn’t as if his shifu taught Xiangyi and Shan Gudao how to fight side by side to defeat other opponents. Losing seemed like something that happened to other people (namely, Shan Gudao), and given the emphasis his shifu and shiniang placed on the competitions, I imagine winning time after time was more than just an adrenaline rush; it was positive reinforcement that he deserved the good things that had come his way, had repaid the debt he owed his shiniang and shifu, and would continue to earn love, respect, a family, a home, and a right to exist.

But when he lost? When he had never had a model for what losing safely feels like? (When the only times he lost were when he lost deliberately to try to cheer up Shan Gudao, but was berated for it, and told it was shameful and wrong to throw a fight for any reason, so losing becomes even more associated with shame?) When losing wasn’t a way to learn, but a sign that he might lose his love, his family, his home? What happens when the scaffolding upholding his right to exist—his ability to win—comes crashing down?

Suicidal ideation. Because he lost not only the battle with Di Feisheng, but also his shixiong, his shixiong’s body, his fiancee, the lives of his men, his reputation, his new home (the Sigu sect), and being able-bodied. In short, he lost everything part of him always feared he’d lose and then some. So why would he think he still has a right to exist, after that? How could he believe someone telling him it wasn’t his fault, when all he has ever known is that the responsibility for everyone he cares for lies with him? 

(I feel like it’s really telling that he didn’t go back to his shiniang’s or shifu’s home after everything went to hell; he said it was because he had been unfilial and couldn’t bear to go back after his shifu died, but it also seems like, given that he had lost everything else, he felt like he didn’t deserve the comfort, family, and home it represented, so staying away is his punishment.)

Given all this, it makes total sense that Li Lianhua wants so desperately to think of Li Xiangyi as dead: he can’t actually reconcile being alive and having failed. So he tries to create a new persona that doesn’t want to be the best in the jianghu or thrive on praise and responsibility, while he tries to correct what he thinks of as his mistakes, before he dies of Bicha poisoning. 

He tries to live the life his shifu wanted for him, where he enjoys pleasures like wine, food, relaxation, and growing things instead of focusing on making a name for himself or winning, and he tries to stay away from people, attachments, and love, because you can’t lose them again if you don’t have them to begin with.

But of course, saying someone is a different person doesn’t make it so. He still wants to be the best–the best physician, the best at scheming, the best at detective work–because he still doesn’t actually know how to be any other way. So he still has the same problems as Li Xiangyi: he still withholds information and commands more than collaborates (it’s frankly amazing he works as well with Fang Duobing and Di Feisheng as he does), still has an overdeveloped sense of responsibility (he believes he has to be the one to save those he cares about and stop everyone else, whether Shan Gudao or the emperor), and at the end, is still suicidal (because now he thinks he’s responsible for the death of his shifu, for not seeing Shan Gudao’s plot, and probably in some warped way for the Nanyin situation once he learns the truth of his heritage, because the man has never met a situation he can’t take the blame for). 

It doesn’t surprise me at all that Li Lianhua doesn’t fully get how much he means to Di Feisheng and Fang Duobing at the end, or that he thinks they just want their version of Li Xiangyi: he can’t imagine being loved and still having made a mistake.

[ilynpilled]

i can fully understand the gripes with certain misogynistic tropes/writing issues that are present in the execution of some of cersei’s writing, but i will never understand the “she should have a redemption arc” or “she should be more likeable/less morally dark” perspective. that is not what her character is or has to be to make it great. wanting more female anti-heroes or “redemption arcs” with moral greyness and complexity of the level that asoiaf gives to primarily male characters is entirely understandable, but do some of you people even like cersei as a character, like at its core? like this is not about criticising the execution of certain things when it comes to this character, this is about taking issue with her as a villain fundamentally, which i just do not agree with at all

[shannonsketches]

I read some tags implying that my Piccolo is Gohan’s Real Dad is a hater statement but listen I never said Goku wasn’t Gohan’s real dad. Some boys have two real dads and an ex-military uncle with a shady past who lets you drink at his house as long as you don’t tell your mom, and that’s okay.

[ellearts]

My design for the Abbi Pulling Helmet contest for the Singapore GP which sadly have not won :((((

[ndostairlyrium]

D2 for the art meme thingy. For Fenris and Hawke cause I think they deserve some non angsty cuddles.

(I LOVE YOUR ART)

since you're going, bring him some veggie meatballs! Those are clearly superior u-u

(Thank you so much omg ;; you're a sweetheart!!)

The Meme

[mixtapedoh]

the amazing, showstopping, incredible @musicallisto enables me daily <3333

for your consideration <3; you may now rest soundly in the knowledge that i am, in all things, correct.