#they deserve more credit than they’re being given

[nerdishpursuits]

I'm sat here perusing various posts and thinking that even when the narrative is developing in a way that's not utterly predicable and the resolution to conflicts is, mostly, decent or satisfactory? There seems to be cause for alarm. Maybe I'm missing something but it baffles me. Now that Pelayo has revealed himself to be gay, there's concern it might actually be a ruse to entrap Marta in his web of deceit. Judging by the looks of him and the revenue of his company, which far exceeds that of Marta's family, it stands to reason this man doesn't need artifice to ensnare a wife. There must be candidates aplenty. Least of all does he need to play the gay-man-card in Franquist Spain. That his motives go deeper than sheer altruism and helping out a fellow misfit in her time of need? Very likely. After all, next episode he tells Marta he has his eyes set on politics. Whether he will try and convince her they both stand to benefit from a lavender marriage, or something else happens that puts one of them, or both, in jeopardy, thus resulting in a union of convenience? All the speculation as of late might be way off the mark, all thanks to some supposed spoiler, unverified and clickbaity. We'll have to wait and see. What's clear is that he is here to stay and his fortunes will become linked with Marta & Fina. I will say, Pelayo's coming-out scene was one I very much enjoyed. Marta lacks friends, especially ones she can be herself around. Doubly gratifying if said friends could also have her back when it comes to the perilous world of business. Especially now that Marta’s position within the company has been weakened by ceding shares to Tasio. So all in all, it was nice seeing both Marta and Pelayo relieved at having stumbled upon an unlikely ally. The mythical unicorn, as it were. Pelayo: I too went to the Uni of Corn Marta: You? Intro to Introverts? I studied under Dr. Sapphis Cunnilingus, SeraFina Valero, class of 1958

That being said? It’s pretty obvious Pelayo’s request that Marta doesn’t reveal his truth to anyone at all, not even esa chica? Will result in some measure of drama. Mafin is well established as a couple and doubting if they love each other is never the issue. Their next hurdle will be one of communication and one which poses somewhat of a moral dilemma: does sharing someone’s secret with your partner, when said person asked you to keep it, a betrayal make? The drama this will stir can be seen from miles away, Legolas style. Marta’s loyalty resides with Fina, no doubt about it. But I'm guessing they will find ways to draw out this narrative and cause tension between them. If well written? It should be entertaining and result in plenty of rewarding scenes.

I also have to say, in all fairness, it irks me that Pelayo referred to Fina as esa chica. It’s obvious he knows who Marta’s partner is (imho, one glimpse at them in Marta’s office and the wheels are turning). But it comes across a tad condescending. I wonder how Fina will take to him initially, but a picnic it won’t be. Fina’s allergic to most men and this one? This one she’ll find particularly irritating. Especially if she doesn’t have all the information. She’s already worried Pelayo has ulterior motives and that Marta might end up paying the price. I will say, I love the fact that Fina’s not jealous, as her trust in Marta is absolute and their relationship has never been plagued by toxicity. What she doesn’t trust is the good intentions of men, especially those who hold information they could use against you.

And now that I’m thinking about it, I do wonder why it’s such a problem for Pelayo that Marta’s partner learns the truth. They’re all in the same boat. They all walk the gauntlet, every day, keenly aware of the dangers their lifestyle exposes them to. Fina wouldn’t betray him. Though I assume, for someone who wants to enter politics? Trusting a stranger to not accidentally spill the beans might prove unwise. In time, he’ll get to know Fina and change his mind - that's a given. I do believe the three of them will ultimately become the best of friends and it will be satisfying to watch them embark upon this journey together. But until then? I expect some drama awaits, right around the corner (also, shout-out to the novelita for adding a gay man to its list of characters: let it not be said we're not getting spoiled) I’ve also been thinking about the garden scenes. They could well have been symbols of Marta and Fina’s new-found freedom. Open space, fresh air, no walls closing in on them. A place they could fence out the world and pretend they could escape it. Alas. Said world is once again closing in on them, presenting them with new limitations to struggle with.

Their freedom has been hard-won but it’s been infringed upon. As such, the garden no longer feels secure or liberating and the scenes have moved indoors. Like a retreat to the tower, after the courtyard has been taken. It should feel somewhat claustrophobic, which it does: Fina worries someone is spying on them, that their beloved sanctuary isn’t the refuge they had hoped it would be. She’s still licking her wounds, weary and mistrusting. And with good reason. Not only has she been through hell and back, but now learns Marta has been on the verge of being sent to prison herself. That she's been exposed in a way that could lead to her downfall. Their downfall. Fina’s worry has as always revolved around something happening to Marta, leading to the loss of the woman she loves. Her anguished “if anything should befall you, it would kill me” is ever telling. And let's not forget this is the second time Fina confesses to this fear. It plagues her nights and waking hours and the show is now emphasizing it. Must be for a reason, because it sounds almost prophetic. I, for one, would like to see something happen to Marta because I’d be curious to watch Fina reacting to that. After all, Fina’s been stabbed, imprisoned and assaulted. Marta’s been spared so far. Let’s see if that changes at some point, in the name of good ol’ fashioned drama.

On a different note. Damián cautioning Marta that this is the life you chose was a good way of addressing Damián’s lingering bias. He has come a really long way and supports his daughter, but he continues to struggle with preconceived notions that don't align with Marta’s truth. Her response to this was perfect too: One doesn’t choose to be who they are.

Lastly. Carmen continuing to infantilize Tasio, absolving him of any and all fault, is laughable. After all, she trusts him as far as she can throw him and it shows. Nevertheless, her over-the-top anger at Marta is a valid portrayal of the type of woman who makes excuses for her husband and demonizes another woman instead. All because she’s managed to fix him and under her care he’s a reformed man. Room to grow for Carmen here, that’s a given. Furthermore, Tasio himself could have shown more backbone and assumed responsibility for his actions but he’s too scared of Carmen’s wrath. The Harridan’s Tale, a book by Carmen Recas. I do look forward to her and Marta patching things up though, which we know they will. Extra points if Fina gets to be a part of that.

[bibluebutterfly]

I think the beautiful thing about the Broppy relationship is how they impact one another.

Branch’s impact on Poppy is the most obvious in the movies because he’s the one who teaches her to calm down and listen.

But what I think people overlook is the fact that despite her flaws, Poppy never gave up on Branch. Because as cute as they are now, there was a time when Branch was actually pretty cruel to her (ie. Putting her down, smashing her custom made invitations for him in front of her face, mocking her ideals, etc) and probably had been treating her like that for years before movie #1.

Everyone else had given up on him, basically deeming him as a lost cause, but Poppy never stopped trying. Yes Branch got on her nerves and hurt her feelings, and as far as she knew he would just throw her invitations away afterwards. Yet despite that she still put in the effort to make him custom invitations and genuinely want him to be there.

And even though he never dared express it, those efforts meant something to him.

Like we love Branch, but I don’t think we give Poppy enough credit for her role in Branch’s life. He was unkind (to put it lightly) to her for years, but despite that she never held any resentment towards him and still felt that he deserved to be happy. And by that incredible persistence, she worked her way into his heart.

See, Branch is a character who is completely used to tragedy and people he loves leaving in his life. So that’s partially why he pushed Poppy away and treated her so poorly. But despite that, Poppy was always THERE. She was with him when literally nobody else was. She was naive, optimistic and annoying, but she was there. Always putting the effort to be his friend, and the only one who had any sort of faith in him. He may have been isolated, but because of Poppy he was never truly alone. And even if it irked him, he still appreciated that.

And when somebody sticks with you literally no matter what, it’s not surprising that he fell more than a little bit in love.

As for Poppy, she’s slowly becoming aware that she can be a bit much sometimes. She always wants the best for her people but she doesn’t always know how to do that. Branch, even if originally rude about it, has always been able to give it to her straight. And even if he pretended not to care, he still had her back when it mattered the most. And after number one, it looks like he has her back more than ever while still being able to be the voice of reason. Which yes, Poppy definitely needs.

(Gah I wish I could put more pictures to elaborate my point but y’all get it.)

Anyway. They’re not perfect characters, but they are perfect for each other. Branch supports Poppy but gives it to her flat out. Meanwhile Poppy too supports Branch and is stubborn enough to stick by him, even when he’ll intentionally and/or unintentionally push her away. And that’s just gorgeous.

[watsername]

oky it’s fucking TIME to talk about mcc misogyny we are NOT dancing around it anymore .

the community fucking hates women . especially the subreddit but also the general community . i can’t talk about every women bc i haven’t watched the pov of every woman in mcc .

tina kitten. her entire mcc experience was being treated as a nerf tool by the community. she only played in a handful of events but her teams routinely credited as some of the lowest ranked teams in the history of mcc in pre-game prospects . they’ve had the LEAST chance at winning and the community commonly rests that blame on tina’s back . is tina a great mcc player? no, she hasn’t had much opportunity to learn from it or practise much. but the constant backlash she faces for being a “bad player” and a “nerf” is demotivating . and after treating her like shit people treat her like shit MORE to tell her she’s overreacting if she is upset or has a problem with anything .

but scar has similar stats . he’s a relatively new player who hasn’t had much chance to learn from the event yet and hasn’t placed top 20. but nobody ever complains about scar being teamed with anyone as a nerf . nobody complains scar is dragging the team down . same goes for people like quackity and karl who don’t regularly place well. nobody complains they’re nerfs or that they’re ruining the teams chances . and evryone is quick to comfort them if they feel bad for ‘letting their team down’

niki nihachu is a similar situation . she’s been playing in the event for well over a year now and is routinely shunned by members of the community for not playing good enough . you can argue ‘she ranks x out of 40 on average’ all you want but does that warrant the way people treat her in her chat and in the subreddit?? does that warrant the immense pressure she feels to improve and the fact that he feels she’s let so many ppl down if she doesn’t?? does it warrant people talking shit talking her and laughing at her for getting emotional due to stress over the event on stream? the fact that she’s so stressed over the event should tell you everything . people has treated her like shit since the beginning for being ‘too emotional’ .

jojosolos. girl. she came into the event as an extremely strong player. she’s placed top ten 6 out of 9 times she’s played (canon and non canon) . for canon events she has 5/6 top ten placements one win and a first individual placement . purpled has 6/7 top ten placements, one team win and one first individual placement . they have extremely similar track records . so why is it that the s tier committee is trying to hard to designate purpled as an s tier but are adamant that jojo doesn’t deserve the same treatment because she’s yet to prove herself as being an s tier player . they have roughly the same stats .

hannahxxrose . she’s faced criticism for her competitiveness over her entire streaming career . to the point where she recently pointed out that people have been calling into question her mental well-being because of her competitive attitude and loudness. some men in the community (specific ones that are hated before the game even starts) are given similar critiques but not once has their mental health been called into question. but the majority of competitive men in the community haven’t been called out on their ‘bad attitudes’, only the ones that specific mcyt communities don’t like to begin with . typically if a man gets loud or starts screaming during the event it’s funny to you . but for a woman she’s taking it too seriously and needs a wellness check .

both jack manifold and karacorvus have an average placement of 26 . kara has one win and jack has lost every dodgebolt he’s been part of . but kara faces harsher criticism bc she doesn’t have the same following as jack manifold so she doesn’t have ppl who will defend her as being a good addition to the team for something other than her ability . bc ppl will defend jacks bad placement because :o !!!! he’s playing with his friends!!!! despite having the same ability as the women that are routinely shit on .

my point is that you can say what you want about certain mcc players . you’re not gonna like everyone . but the double standards between male and female mcc competitors is very much real and a problem in the fanbase. more people are fans of the male streamers and i get that’s why you want them to succeed. but to overlook the flaws you degrade female plaster for in the creators you admire is to have an internal bias against them . if you’re going to have criticisms they’re gonna have ti be for EVERYONE who uses that kind of behaviour . and i think if we see that enforces you’ll realise that a lot of the critiques were bullshit to begin with .

and this can NOT be chalked up to the behaviour of the dsmp community alone . you’re all just as bad, this focuses primarily on dsmp examples bc i watxh primarily dsmp streamers. ALL of this happens on the mcc subreddit .

[happy74827]

No Ordinary Life

[Sam Riordan x Female!Reader]

Synopsis: The group had almost ran out of options on what to do with Sam, but Andre had decided there was still one more option to explore. And that option, was you. (GIF credits: @heronamedhawks)

WC: 1,179

Category: Slight Fluff, Slight Angst

We don’t know much about Sam as of right now, but I do know I would literally die for this boy. He and Emma really deserve the world, and they fr better have their happy ending (which seems impossible given the universe they live in, but one can hope). This definitely deserves a part 2, depending how well it goes, but for now enjoy the purity that is Sam.

Edit(2023): Hey I finally made the part 2, check it out here

『••✎••』

As Sam walked down the bustling halls of Godolkin, he couldn't help but feel like an outsider. All around him, kids with extraordinary powers, kids like him, were chatting, laughing, and walking to their classes. They were able to use their gifts freely and openly, and they were respected by others for it, but Sam didn't have that luxury. Honestly, he couldn’t remember a time that he did.

All he remembered was the woods, his brother, and the constant pain of being hunted.

His hand unconsciously traveled to top of his head, pulling the hoodie that Emma had lent over to him farther over his face as he tried to remain as inconspicuous as possible. It wasn't easy when the hallway was completely crowded by nosy students, but he did his best. That’s all he could really do.

Emma and Marie (as he found her name to be) were by his side, protecting him for the skewing eyes of others. For the most part it worked, except it drawn more attention to her due to that odd system that Emma had acknowledged him about. A rating, whatever that was.

It was cool to know that his brother had been ranked number one, though.

If Luke was still… No, don’t think about it, Sam.

He shook his head, ridding himself of that train of thought. There was no point in dwelling on the past, and thinking about his brother wouldn’t change anything. He was gone, and Sam was left alone.

His thoughts were interrupted by Jordan, who he was still slightly confused about. He? She? They? They seemed to have been good friends with his brother and they were friendly enough, so Sam didn’t really question the matter too much.

Plus, he kinda enjoyed the subtle sarcasm that Jordan would once in a while use. It made him feel like a kid back in school. So for that, Sam was thankful.

“Dude, this has got to be the stupidest thing we’ve ever done,” Jordan had said, turning to the guy walking besides them… Andre. Sam didn’t know what to make of him, or anyone really. He had always been so closed off from other people, that now it was almost a bit overwhelming.

But at least he had Emma, so he didn't have to worry about the social aspect too much.

Andre gave Jordan a sideways look, a small smirk on his face. He seemed pretty chill too.

“Listen, I don’t like this anymore than you do, Jordan,” Andre stated, shoving his hands in his pockets. “But with everything happening, and with Cate… this is our best option.”

“Yes, let’s bring the kid with a bounty over his head into the place where they’re all going to be looking for him. Great idea, Andre. Seriously, how did I not think of it first. Soooo smart of you, dude. Good job. I'm so glad we're friends, really I am.”

Jordan rolled their eyes, and Andre just looked away in annoyance. Then, to Sam’s dismay, an awkward silence fell over the group. Once again, Sam was struck by just how different his life was now. It was like he was suddenly thrown into another world, and he had no idea how to function in it. He was so far out of his comfort zone that he couldn’t even see the zone.

Sam glanced over to Emma, and saw her smiling encouragingly at him. He tried his best to return the gesture, but he felt like his face muscles were going to fall off if he forced them any longer.

After what seemed like hours, but really only a couple minutes, Andre halted in front of a random dorm room door, and turned to face the group. He sighed, his face set into a look of grim determination. Then, he knocked.

Three times, Sam counted. Three knocks.

The door opened almost immediately after, and the man who answered had to be the most handsome human being Sam had ever seen. He had short black hair, a sharp jaw, and a dazzling smile. It was actually kind of intimidating.

“Whadda’ want?” the man asked, his voice a rich baritone. Sam didn't know why, but it felt like the man was judging him. His eyes scanned over the group, lingering on Sam for just a second, before returning back to Andre.

Andre cleared his throat, a bit nervously, but he didn’t get a chance to speak as Jordan scoffed, shoving past the man and into the room. Emma followed, giving the man an apologetic look as she did. And thus, everyone followed, leaving the man alone and bewildered in the doorway.

Once everyone was settled inside, the man shut the door and leaned against it, crossing his arms over his chest. He glared at Andre, his eyes burning holes through his head, but Sam didn’t pay any attention towards him anymore. All his eyes were on the strange girl in front of him, you.

You were sitting on the floor, legs crossed and a bored expression on your face. Your eyes were half lidded, and you seemed to be lost in your own little world. Andre had mentioned you, a little. Said that you were the person he had called earlier, that you would help them figure out what to do with Sam, and that you knew and could a lot of stuff. But he had never told them how gorgeous you were.

Your hair was down, and looked so soft that Sam just wanted to touch it, run his fingers through it, and feel the texture. You had a cute little button nose, and a round, chubby face that was just too adorable. And your eyes were so expressive, a mixture of colors that swirled and shone and sparkled in the light.

Andre had called your attention and you snapped out of it, blinking a few times before glancing up at him. It was then that you noticed the others, and you stared at them all, wide eyed and open mouthed, but that was quickly replaced with a smile.

“Hi, Andre! Wow, you must be Jordan… Marie… and Emma? Right? Oh, and you must be the kid Andre talked about, oh my gosh. It's so nice to finally meet you all. Sorry I didn’t say anything when you came in, I was just finishing up this thing for Kota. Oh, Kota! You're still here… hi. Wait, why are you all here? You weren’t supposed to be here until 2:00, and it's only-”

You looked down at the watch on your wrist, your eyes widening even more when you realized the time. You had been talking so fast that no one had been able to get a word in edgewise, but you had managed to finish what you had to say, and it was all so rushed that it was hard to keep up.

The only thing Sam could focus on was how despite all of that rambling and mumbling, you were still keeping that bright smile that never seemed to falter. A truly happy supe? He never thought it would exist. Even Emma, as sweet and pretty as she was, tended to falsify the smiles she had. Sam only saw her real one about three times. He cherished them, of course. Every single one.

You stood up, brushing yourself off and fixing your clothes, and walked over to them. Your hand was outstretched, and your smile was radiant. Sam could practically feel the happiness radiating off of you.

You looked so innocent, so sweet and pure. He could hardly believe that you were a supe, but the fact that they were all standing here said otherwise. You had power, and you knew how to use it.

Jordan and Marie seemed to have recovered from their daze, and the two shook your hand after Andre. Marie had even introduced herself, and it ended with you in giggles, telling her that you already had known her name.

Emma was next, and she had taken your hand immediately and shook it.

Then it was just him that was left.

He stood frozen, staring down at your outstretched hand. He could feel all the eyes in the room on him, and he just knew that his hood was starting to slip.

His instincts were yelling at him, screaming at him to run. To get out of there and stay far, far away from you. From everyone.

But he couldn’t.

So, instead of fleeing, he slowly, cautiously took your hand in his. It was small, warm, and fit perfectly.

You smiled again but this time it was strictly for him, because of him, and it made his heart beat just a bit faster.

He didn’t even realize it until your smile has widened, but he had pulled down his hood, letting you see his face. He didn't understand why he did, and a part of him wanted to pull the fabric right back over his face, but it was too late now.

The damage had been done.

Sam didn’t have a chance to scrape off the dried blood off his cheeks, another result of an accidental outburst, and he could feel your eyes rake over his face, taking in every single detail.

But it wasn’t judgmental, or critical.

No, there was something else in those swirling eyes of yours, and it was then that he noticed the little flecks of gold hidden in the sea of color.

Sam was a bit embarrassed, to say the least, and he tried to pull his hand away but your grip only tightened, and he didn't have the strength to resist. He felt your hand go up his arm, unraveling the hoodie that clung to him like a second skin.

The others didn’t seem to do anything as you pulled the material above his elbow.

Your eyes roamed over the scar that stretched across his forearm, and he knew what was coming before the words even left your mouth.

Sam couldn’t bring himself to look at you as you asked the dreaded question, and his eyes were glued to the floor.

It was Emma who answered, her voice barely a whisper.

Sam despised the pity in your tone. The last thing he wanted was to be pitied. He didn't need or want anyone's pity. He was fine. Everything was fine.

The silence shattered as you took a sharp breath, but Sam couldn't bring himself to look at you. Not when he knew the look of pity in your eyes.

You released his arm, the hoodie dropping to the ground, but Sam didn't even register it. He stood there, frozen, as you slowly reached out your hand towards his face.

"Before I do anything, I want to warn you so it doesn't scare you. Is that okay with you? I just... I want to make sure you're alright. But if you don't want me to touch you, I won't. I'll respect your boundaries. Just tell me, okay?"

Sam blinked, his head tilting upwards, his eyes wide with surprise. There was no pity in your eyes. No negativity or degradation. Only a gentle concern and kindness that he had only experienced in these past few days.

Your touch was tender, and he felt a warmth spread across his face. He couldn't bring himself to deny you. So he nodded, and a small smile appeared on your face. It was still a smile, but a different kind. One he had never seen from you before. And once again, that smile was meant just for him.

Suddenly, the lights in the room dimmed, capturing Sam's attention. He hadn't noticed before, but the entire room was filled with interconnected lights, forming a grid-like pattern. They began to glow, pulsating and shifting with each passing moment. The light danced across the walls, creating mesmerizing shapes.

Sam was captivated by the whole process. And then, the lights suddenly stopped, freezing in place. Sam expected them to return to their normal brightness, but they grew brighter and brighter. It was then that he noticed your hands. They were no longer touching him, but rather, they hovered above him, palms facing his face. A peculiar expression settled on your face.

Sam didn't know what it meant, but he didn't have time to wonder because, in an instant, your hands transformed into light. It wasn't like beams shooting out of your palms, but rather, golden particles that flowed around your body and traveled along the lights, intensifying their brightness. Patterns began to form and move.

Sam watched in awe as the shapes transformed into pictures and scenes. The colors melted and shifted together. Light filled the room, washing away the world around him, leaving only the vibrant colors, the images, and your face.

Your face, so close to his. The smile still adorned your lips, and your eyes shone like stars, the brightest things in the room. Sam could feel his heart pounding in his chest. Reluctantly, he admitted that the light was beautiful, just like you.

It was the most extraordinary sight he had ever witnessed. It was as if the sun had exploded, its light spreading across the room. The colors danced along the walls, forming vivid images. Sam saw a field, a house, a family. He saw his old friends. He saw him. His brother, Luke.

Sam's face crumpled, and a sob escaped his throat. Tears blurred his vision, but they were absorbed by the light, vanishing as soon as they fell. You remained a silent observer, watching over him as the colors gradually faded, and the world returned.

The room was as bright as before, but everything was the same. Sam could still see the concern and worry etched on your face. You reached up to wipe away his tears, but this time he flinched back, and the contact never happened. Your hands fell to your sides.

Tears welled up in your eyes, and your lips trembled, trying to hold back your emotions. But a tear escaped, rolling down your cheek. Andre cleared his throat, breaking the spell. Both you and Sam turned to face the others.

They were all watching, expressions of shock and confusion on their faces, except for Jordan, who wore a mask of indifference.

Andre and Emma stared at you, mouths agape, while Sam saw the tears in your eyes, the fear evident on your face.

Of what, he couldn’t tell. As of right now, there were so many things you could be scared of. With The Woods, being the thing that contains most of it all, It was hard to pinpoint one specific reason.

Then, just like before, Andre's voice cracked as he decided to interrupt Sam’s thoughts.

"What the hell was that?"

[broomsick]

Will the gods be upset with me if I do nothing for an entire year or more? Ive not tried to communicate, or left offerings or anything as im really not able to all the time.. and my mental health has not been all too kind. My nan also has dementia now so just been stressed and drained. Now and again each morning I will look toward my altar and say good morning to them. They are in my thoughts.

Why hello there, friend.

I’m so, so sorry to hear that you’re going through such a difficult time. There’s always mystery surrounding the thoughts of the Gods, the way they feel about our human lives and emotions. While it’s true that we can only grasp at what they think, there is also a great aspect of spiritual practice which we can all rely on to some extent: that is our faith, our instinct— in general, what our gut tells us.

And I personally believe that the Gods care for us, no matter how often we can afford to make offerings, or how often we pray. I believe they care about us in spite of our flaws. I have actually shared more on my thoughts on the topic in this previous post, if you’re interested in hearing the reasons behind this belief. I’ve always thought faith was at the very core of polytheism, after all, none of us practice in exactly the same way, but all of us share one thing in common: belief in the Gods. And what you have been doing, just keeping them in your thoughts, even making the effort of saying hello every morning, is plenty enough already. I feel like the Gods sometimes act towards us like they act towards a friend: a friend wouldn’t blame you, knowing all that you’re going through, right?

Now, I must also specify two things about this particular topic. The first is that I’ve never given credit to the idea that the Gods will get angry at every little “mistake”. Experience taught me that when somebody is trying to convince you that this or that deity is somehow “mad” at you, they’re very probably using a guilt tactic to manipulate you to some extent. And even if they’re not, then they’re still trying to make you adhere to their beliefs, thus placing them in a position of spiritual authority.

As I’ve mentioned, I’m no better than anybody when it comes to guessing at the Gods’ feelings. However, I’ve never heard of, or experienced a deity being somehow angry at one of their worshippers. Sure, this sort of occurrence appears in myth! But I’m always the first to point out that mythology and reality are fully distinct, and it’s important to draw that line when it comes to neo-pagan practice.

I hope you find in your heart that your deities do care for you very much. Sometimes it’s this faith that gets us through such difficult times of disconnect from spirituality. Every one us experiences these moments when we’re so busy we can barely spare a thought for our practice. But it’s nothing at all to feel guilty for. The amount of time we can dedicate to all aspects of our lives is variable. The Gods know this, and I believe they also know of our struggles as humans.

I hope you know that you’re so very resilient and strong, and that I admire you greatly for dealing with all of this, all the while keeping a thought for your spirituality. I hope you’re given all the care and support you deserve, and I believe your deities are right at your side, providing you with guidance and encouragement.

[celestial-toys]

That I Would Be Good [1/5]

How to Help

You take note of the two people on this couch with you. These innocent lives you brought into this awful world, with no thought given to the consequences. Stereotyped them down into boxes and expected a perfect fit—naive enough to think you could bring a fantasy to life.

You really want to apologize for falling into the business of playing God.

- - - - - - -

In This Chapter

Moon attempts to care for you as you do a little bedrotting.

The boys debate over taste in entertainment as you cry over work stress.

Much to Sun's chagrin though it all may be, you're saved from a potential night spent sleeping with your dog on the cold, hard hallway floor.

Pairing: Sun x Moon x Reader

Word Count: 5,174

Contains: [AU - Real World] [depiction of depression] [crying] [arguing] [an episode of vertigo] [tension] [fear]

A/Ns: This is a songfic. Lyrics and title are from 'That I Would Be Good' by Alanis Morissette.

This fic is part of my AU “[Not] Made by Design”, the full series can be found here.

Links to other parts of this fic: [Ch.1 (you are here)] [Ch.2] [Ch.3] [Ch.4] [Ch.5]

Lastly but certainly not least, this fic is dedicated to my friend Adrianna @roses-and-tears, whom I’ve been teasing with the existence of this fic for far too long. Thank you for your patience as I took my sweet time on this, and thank you for your patience with me in general. Your friendship means a lot to me, as does your endless support of my writing. I’m really grateful to have you in my life. Happy Birthday, Adri. 💛

That I would be good even if I did nothing.

Late afternoon sunlight slips through the slim crack between the drawn curtains covering your balcony doors. Over the past hours you’ve absently watched it grow from a bright yellow at noon to a vibrant orange now, the thin line cast across your bedsheets growing longer as the sun slips lower and lower. It serves as the only illumination in the room, all of your various lights and screens turned off in an effort to pretend that it’s an acceptable hour to be miserably curled up in bed, ignoring the world.

The occasional soft, muffled sounds of various housework being done by your—rightfully concerned, you suppose, yet surprisingly concerned, if you’re being honest—partners prevents you from ignoring the entire world, though. The subtle reminder that they’re here with you, that the house isn’t really empty, serves as a comfort that you aren’t sure you deserve. A small part of you wishes you truly were alone again, so at least you’d have a good reason to feel this way. You’d certainly feel less guilty about it too.

To their credit, they’ve handled this episode pretty well. Giving you space when you request it and proximity when you need it. Checking in on you. Keeping you clean, hydrated, and fed to the best of their ability in spite of your reluctance.

You just wish you could pull yourself out of this already.

You have work to do.

The mere thought of all that you’ve fallen behind on has you reaching up, grabbing at the corners of your pillow and tugging them down over your ears, eyes pinching closed in desperate avoidance.

Through the pillow you barely pick up on the muffled sound of soft knocking at your door.

You sigh, and manage a weak acknowledgment. “Yeah?”

Moon’s low voice rumbles through the barrier. “May I come in?”

You cough, clearing your parched throat. “...Yeah.”

The door swings open slowly and you squint, expecting the sting of the bright hallway light to hit, but it never does. You crack an eye open, releasing your hold on the pillow and tilting your head to watch him enter.

Your voice comes out more aggravated than you intend it to sound. “We got a bulb out in the hallway or something?”

Moon pauses halfway through closing the door behind him, his monitor swiveling around to face you. “Hmm?”

You clarify. “The light’s off out there.”

Understanding straightens the scrunched lines on his display that serve as his eyebrows. “Oh, no. The lights are fine, I just…” His monitor swings back around to align with his body as he gently pushes the door closed. “I’ve gathered that it hurts your eyes.”

The door quietly clicks shut and the light of his screen dims, adjusting its brightness to match that of the room. “The contrast, I mean. It being so bright out there when the bedroom is… so dark.”

A look, half-guilt and half-apology tugs at your features as you watch him approach the bed. “I’m sorry…”

His monitor clicks about 20 degrees to the right. “What for?”

His question is spoken so softly, so gently, and if you didn’t know better you’d almost believe that he really can’t think of anything you’d have to apologize to him for.

You know that couldn’t be further from the truth, though.

You’re about to acknowledge his ironic disdain for the darkness, but as you watch him reach down and experimentally lift the still-full bottle of water he refilled for you some odd hours ago, you pause. As his neutral expression curls into a small frown, you realize you should apologize for that, too. Your mind quickly offers up more and more things that you should apologize for, and within seconds your eyes are welling up with tears.

“Everything…” you say as you blink, letting them roll along your temples and—annoyingly—into one of your ears.

His monitor turns halfway toward you, but his false eyes don’t follow the motion, still locked on the bottle of water he’s thoughtfully swirling in his hand. His real eye must take in the state of you though, either that or his mics picked up on the emotion in your voice, because he passes the bottle into his left hand before turning and gesturing down toward the mattress with his right. “May I sit next to you?”

You nod, knowing he can see the motion even in the dim light, and you shift a bit from your dent in the mattress for the first time in… well, probably since Sun poked his proverbial nose in here an hour or two ago to make sure you were still breathing. Begrudgingly, you haul yourself up into a somewhat-vertical position, knowing if you don’t do it now Moon will coax you into it soon anyways. You pull your long sleeve down over your hand and use it to wipe at a few wet tear tracks.

Moon settles himself down on the mattress next to you, gently helping to pull away the sheets just enough to free you from your blanket prison as you halfheartedly reposition yourself. He rests the bottle on his left knee, monitor turning toward his right to face you.

“I don’t think that’s necessary. I think… a lot of the things you apologize for don’t even need one in the first place, and as for the things that do need one… well, you’ve already given them and I— …we’ve already accepted them.”

You sigh. “I wish it were easier for me to believe you.”

His tone has an edge of resignation, or… defeat, in it when he replies. “...So do I, star.”

His simulated breath deepens a bit and in the quiet of the room you hear his cooling system kick down a notch due to his shift into physical inactivity. He passes the water bottle into his right hand, his gaze flicking down toward it and then up to you. “Can you take a sip of this for me, please?”

Now that you’ve actually tried to speak and realized how… gross your mouth feels, you take it from him without reluctance and take not one but several sips, greedily downing it as your body finally recognises its thirst.

Settling the bottle in your lap, you shake your head a bit at his offered hand. “I’ll hold onto it for now… thank you.”

You steal another glance up at his monitor and see a small, unexpected smile and kind crescent eyes. “Of course.”

As his hands fold neatly in his lap, you question him. “Is Sun mad at me?”

His expression fades back into one of concerned confusion. “Why do you think that?”

You shrug and take another sip of your water, downplaying your explanation. “…Dunno. Just feels like that sometimes.” You think for a moment. “I wouldn’t blame him for it if he was. Wouldn’t blame you either.”

Moon’s display swivels side to side on its axis, shaking his head in disagreement. “I don’t think he is. I mean… you know Sun. He’s cold. Not as much as he once was, but still colder than I am, at least. Distant. Quiet. But… I don’t believe that he’s mad.”

He shifts, leaning back against the headboard and stretching his legs out across the length of the bed, crossing them as he releases an imitation of a breath. Angling his screen back toward you, he whispers, “You wanna know what I think?”

You nod, eyes widening in curiosity.

“I think he’s just as worried about you as I am. He just doesn’t know how to show it, or what to even do with such an emotion in the first place.”

You frown, your mind automatically finding yourself at fault. “I—I did my best to train your AIs identically… I don’t—I don’t know what happened with his emotional processing—”

Moon cuts you off, redirecting your attention with a gentle hand on your arm. “That’s not what I meant. I didn’t mean to blame you. AIs…” his voice and expression both turn playful, “…we’re a dangerous thing. You never truly know how we’re gonna turn out.” He nudges your shoulder with his, and you fight back a tiny laugh.

A comfortable sort of silence falls over the dark room, and you break it with one more quiet question. “…What’s he doing right now?”

“Same thing as Zero is, actually. Sleeping.”

His features dissipate, display changing as he pulls up an image he’d apparently taken of the dog and the bot sprawled across the couch. You huff a laugh at the sight of the two of them attempting to fit together.

“He told me he was up all night, but wouldn’t elaborate on why. So I wasn’t very shocked when he crashed in the living room and asked me to bring him his cable earlier.”

You sigh and look away, half-amused and half-stressed. The image fades, Moon’s default expression taking its place. You take another swig from your bottle before leaning back and to your left, the pillow behind you sliding along the headboard until you’re pressed against Moon’s side. “I wish he wouldn’t strain his battery like that. Gonna have to bring him in for a premature replacement at this rate.”

Moon nods, humming a quiet concurrence as he raises an arm, carefully wrapping it around your shoulders, your silent request for comfort heard loud and clear.

---------------------------

Neither of you ever got an answer as to what had kept Sun up that night. But, if you’d been able to look inside his mind and see his most recent activity, you’d have found a messy assortment of browser tabs, each one’s title containing the keywords “depression” and “how to help.”

That I would be good even if I got the thumbs down.

You’re settled atop Sun’s lap on your too-small couch, back comfortingly pressed against his chest, legs stretching out across the cushions to rest on Moon’s thighs. He’s the only one out of the three of you that’s actually sitting on the couch properly, Sun instead opting for his usual lengthwise position, one arm draped along the back of the couch and the other wrapped around your waist.

One advantage of his mechanical body is that he can keep his head twisted 90 degrees to the left, facing the TV for as long as he’d like and never know the pain of a sore neck.

He seems just as invested in what’s on the TV as Moon is, and if the repetitive shifts in lighting and audio are anything to go by, you’re willing to bet they’re having another silent argument over what to watch. Too absorbed in the game on your phone to be bothered by the inconsistent ambiance, you brush aside the stray thought to remind them that they could each just watch their own show in their HUDs instead of fighting over the big screen. Their strange insistence on adhering to the “human” way of doing things is something for you to psychoanalyze another time.

You half-listen to the TV as it switches back and forth between what sounds like BBC Earth, and The (ironically named) Learning Channel, taking note of the way Sun’s body warms. His cooling system audibly kicks in, and the creator in you takes immediate notice, the attention to your phone waning as your concern over Sun’s internal temperature rises.

You pause your game, pulling in a breath as you prepare to interject on whatever silent argument is getting him so heated, but they beat you to the punch, their internal exchange suddenly becoming external.

“—Because we’ve seen it before! I already know everything I could possibly need to know about crabs!” Moon’s voice cuts through the background noise and you flinch a bit at its sudden volume.

Sun’s curled fingers splay out flat across your stomach, apparently trying to calm you and argue with Moon at the same time. “It’s not about knowledge! It’s about the implications! The metaphor!”

Moon’s monitor pivots away from the TV and over to Sun, his volume lowering a bit as his optics pass over your form curled against Sun. “What implications?”

You twist around a bit to get a glance at the screen when the narrator says something that catches your ear.

“Our spy becomes the crab's defender.”

The three of you turn and watch as a robotic imitation of a crab serves as a mechanical wall of defense between a vulnerable, soft shelled crab and a hungry stingray.

You feel Sun’s arm tighten around you.

Confused and unimpressed, Moon turns back toward his solar counterpart. “Mhm, that’s lovely, Sun, but what does it have to do with us?”

Sun’s volume drops as you feel his body mimic a sigh. “More than your stupid ‘Thousand Coupons and Counting’ show does, that’s for sure…”

You feel your phone buzz in your hand, the darkened screen lighting up once again and drawing your attention away from Moon’s rebuttal.

“Oh, come on, that’s not even the name...”

Their petty quarrel quickly becomes background noise as your focus zeroes in on the message preview in your notifications.

[ Hey, sorry to bother you at such an hour, but I finally had time to relay your most recent proposed alterations to the client’s requested design… ]

Your stomach drops as you tap to open the message and are met with a bullet point list of complaints and questions relayed from the client through one of your colleagues. You’re grateful that your team has a dedicated customer relations department because if you had to communicate with this particular client directly, you may be out of a job.

Your mood quickly grows sour and defeated as you scan over the list of criticisms, your colleague’s addition of a sympathetic [😕] at the end of their message doing little to soften the blow. You’ve spent countless hours trying to find work-arounds and alternatives to this client's unrealistic requests, the head of your team insistent that you find a way to please them lest you cost the company a “substantial potential profit.”

Clenching your jaw, you fight to keep a level head. You fight the urge to type out a hasty response, one you know would be full of childish, whining complaints about the inconvenient timing and the client’s unrealistic demands. You then fight the subsequent urge to just turn your phone off, and maybe hurl it through a window for good measure.

“Why would we need to know that? When will we ever need to afford fifteen 2-liters of Mountain Dew and ten jugs of Tide on a tight budget?! Who shops like that?!” Sun’s rapidly rising voice is enough to finally break through your swirling thoughts. The sound of your boys arguing, as ridiculous as the topic may be, only adds fuel to your emotional fire.

You fight the urge to cry, and you fail.

Clicking your phone screen off, you curl further in on yourself and press your temple against the back cushion of the couch. Moon’s voice dies down halfway through his retort, his attention quickly drawn to your sudden display of emotion. Sun’s focus falls on you at the same time, his sensors instantly picking up on the shift in your breathing and increase in your heart rate.

Moon’s body shifts, turning toward you and leaning closer as the hand he’d had resting on your knee begins to pet up and down the length of your shin in a gentle bid for your attention.

Sun aggressively whispers to Moon as the hand he’d had resting on the back of the couch comes down to hover anxiously over your head. “You idiot, look what you did!”

Moon mirrors his hushed tone. “What I did? You’re the one being unreasonable!”

You shake your head and clear your throat before cutting in. “This isn’t… about that.”

Sun’s hand comes down to awkwardly pet down your hair as you lean away from where you’d head-butted the couch cushion. “What… is this about then? What upset you?”

You turn your head, pressing your chin against your shoulder to dry the tears that had trailed down and converged there. You internally debate over how to explain yourself before giving up shortly after, opting instead to silently pull the message back up on your phone and hand the thing to Sun for him to read.

He takes in the message’s contents with typical robotic speed before handing the phone over to Moon, an unreadable expression on his display. Moon scrolls back up, reading the list of complaints and releasing a sigh as he hands the phone back to you. “They’re being unreasonable.”

You nod in agreement, releasing a sigh of your own. “Can’t tell ‘em that, though.”

Your words hang in the air as a contemplative silence falls over the room, and it’s then that you idly note that one of them must have muted the TV at some point. With their debate over taste in entertainment quickly drawn to a close, you suddenly feel guilty. “I’m sorry…”

“What for?” Sun’s voice questions over your shoulder.

“Ruining another evening…”

Moon scoffs, his retort lighthearted with a dose of rare sarcasm. “Oh, of course! How dare you interrupt our ‘important’ television debate with your silly little real-world problems.”

You glance at him, cracking a small smile, but it doesn’t last. Sighing, you lean further back into Sun, letting your head fall back until it’s resting on his shoulder. From the corner of your periphery, you see his head pull back and tilt down to get a better look at you.

“It’s not even just this one client, it’s… I mean- it is, but… fighting over what is and isn’t possible… nowadays it just reminds me of how I fought with the team over your designs. Reminds me of all the ways that I let you down. All the ways I failed you.”

You watch a frown form on Moon’s display, and you’re about to apologize for dredging up the past again, but Sun’s hands are quick to distract you. Reaching down and around you, he takes the phone from your hand, moving slowly enough to give you time to resist his attempts should you choose to. Meeting no resistance, he cradles the phone in your lap, and watching over your shoulder, opens the message once again and begins typing out a response.

[ Please remind them that while we are always eager to please, there are certain limitations to what sorts of ideas we can bring to life. Link them to our Product Design FAQ page if you haven’t already. I’ll review their comments and look into potential alterations first thing Monday morning, when our business hours resume. Thank you. ]

Moon’s curiosity got the best of him, leaning across the length of the couch to get an upside-down look at the phone screen. Rotating his faceplate 180 degrees, he hums in approval before leaning back, head slowly completing a 360 and righting itself once again.

Sun’s thumbs pull away from the keyboard and he requests your approval in a low voice. “That sound good?”

You want to ask him why he’s helping you. You want to ask Moon why he isn’t mad. You want to ask them why you’re even still employed, why you even deserve the job you’re apparently so bad at. You want to apologize for everything under the sun.

You take note of the two people on this couch with you. These innocent lives you brought into this awful world, with no thought given to the consequences. Stereotyped them down into boxes and expected a perfect fit—naive enough to think you could bring a fantasy to life.

You really want to apologize for falling into the business of playing God.

But you don’t. You re-read the message and let out a soft, resigned sigh, nodding. “Better than any response I’d be able to come up with tonight. Thank you.”

You raise a hand, tapping the send button, and then watch as Sun puts your phone on do not disturb before clicking it off once more. You point to the coffee table and he places it there, and Moon reaches for the TV remote at the same time. As you quietly readjust yourself in Sun’s hold, Moon offers you the remote with a soft question. “What would you like to watch?”

That I would be good if I got and stayed sick.

Flicking the light off, you make your way out of the bathroom and down the hall. Zero trails directly behind you, the dog insistent as always that you be accompanied on the long, arduous journey from the bedroom to the bathroom and back.

Perhaps, this time she could sense something that you couldn’t, because no more than a few steps into your short trip back, something quickly begins to feel… off. Closing your eyes and coming to a halt in the middle of the hall, you feel your stomach drop as you register the dreaded, familiar feeling of the world starting to spin around you.

Attempting a deep breath, you open your eyes and immediately regret it, disoriented and beginning to grow a bit panicked at how quickly this came over you. Muttering a soft “fuck… not again…” you reach out, placing a hand on the wall in an attempt to steady yourself. You try to at least make it back to the bedroom, but a terribly familiar hint of nausea makes itself known, and you suddenly aren’t sure if you should try for the bedroom or the bathroom.

Your body ends up deciding for you, a wave of lightheadedness teaming up with the dizzying sensation and quickly convincing you that taking a seat right where you are isn’t such a bad idea. As you slowly slide down the wall, butt thumping against the floor, you shakily call out. “Guys?”

Within five seconds, two round screens with wide digital eyes peek out from the bedroom’s open doorway. Stumbling over one another to get out of the room as soon as they see you on the floor, they question you in tandem. “What happened?!”

Clearing the short distance in a few strides to reach you, they both crouch down, one on each of your sides, Zero nervously pacing back and forth between them.

“I… I don’t know. It just hit me again out of nowhere.”

Moon’s faceplate clicks back and forth rapidly, a few degrees to the right, then a few degrees to the left. You close your eyes again, unable to look at him for long. You don’t have it in you to tell him that the motion itself is a dizzying sight. Sun seems to gather as much from his quiet observation, reaching out and roughly pinching the edge of Moon’s display, bringing the lunar bot’s anxious fidgeting to an abrupt halt.

“Vertigo?” Sun wastes no time in getting straight to the point, as usual.

You press your head back against the wall with a quiet groan. “Uhuh.”

“Can you tell us what—exactly—you’re feeling right now?” Moon questions you softly as he subtly struggles to pry Sun’s iron grip off of his head.

“Uhh… dizzy… lightheaded… getting kinda nauseous…”

Sun’s hand gravitates toward its favorite spot—that being around your neck—and since you don’t see it coming, you flinch.

He sighs, thumb finding its home on your pulse. “…It’s just me. You should know by now that I’m not gonna hurt you.”

You huff a humorless laugh in spite of your current state. “Yeah, well, I should know a lotta things by now.”

Sun doesn’t humor you with a snarky response, too focused on the current matter at hand. “Your pulse is pounding. Fast.” He’s quiet for a beat before tacking on a question. “Do you not feel it?”

You scoff. “Of course I do, Sun. I’m just used to it. It’s just doing that ‘cause I’m…” you hesitate, but honesty slips out of you rather easily in this state, “...scared.”

Concern seeps into his voice. “Of me?”

This time there’s a bit of humor in the laugh that he draws out of you. “No, Sunny… not you. Not this time.” You press the heels of your hands into the floor, searching for something grounding. “...It’s this. I’m scared of this. Whatever’s happening to me.”

Moon chimes in. “It’s gonna pass. It always does.” He places a hand on your knee. “And we’re right here. Gonna help you through it, just like always.”

You dare to crack your eyes open again, and find his screen blessedly still, light dim. “Still scares me though… don’t know why it’s happening.”

Sun retracts his hand from your neck. “We’ll figure it out. First priority is getting you situated somewhere more suitable. Do you want to go back to bed?”

You mull it over, wishing your nausea would decide to either get worse or get gone already so you could make up your mind. “I… wanna get back in bed, but… I don’t know if this nausea is gonna get worse or not.”

Sun almost shakes his head, but stops just short of it, not wanting to mirror Moon and make things worse. “You know we have a bucket dedicated to solving that very problem, so you can cross that off of your list of concerns. Besides, if it gets worse and you change your mind, we can always take you to the bathroom, easily.”

Sighing, you allow his reasoning to override your anxious, indecisive mind. “Yeah… okay. That’s fine by me, as long as you’re sure you don’t mind.”

Moon answers for both of them. “Of course we don’t.”

Sun leans back on his heels. “If that was the only thing keeping you, then why don’t we move this to the bedroom?”

In spite of your current state, you can’t help but crack a smile, unable to resist the opportunity to tease him. “Goodness, Mr. Sun. Too eager to even buy me dinner first?”

It takes the solar bot a moment to process the implications of your words, but the way the concerned expression on his face swaps to an empty black screen is enough to tell you that he got the joke—and that perhaps—he didn’t like it.

His voice comes out deadpan as he suddenly stands, distancing himself from you in more ways than one. “Ha-ha, very funny. If you’re feeling well enough to joke around then perhaps you don’t need my help after all.”

Moon grabs ahold of Sun’s ankle as he attempts to walk away, mirroring the iron grip the solar bot had recently had on him. “Come on, Sunny, don’t be like that…”

Sun gives a sharp tug on his leg, but Moon’s grip doesn’t relent. Even without a face nor a voice, you can still sense him silently telling Moon to not test him. You know better than almost anybody that their physical strength is perfectly matched to one another. They could stay locked in a stalemate until their batteries died if either of them truly desired it.

As amusing as it may be to push Sun’s buttons, even you know when something’s about to go too far, so you make the call to break it up. “Ah, let him go, Moon. He’s put up with enough of my shit for one night.”

Moon releases his counterpart, and Sun mutters a quiet “That’s right.” beneath his breath, striding back into the bedroom.

Zero yawns into a whine.

You shakily reach a hand up to pet her and she bends down, slipping her head beneath it. Your voice is something close to jaded when you address the quiet lunar automaton still crouched beside you. “Well, now that I’ve successfully put everyone in a bad mood, I suppose it’s time for bed, huh?”

He’s his usual understanding self when he replies. “I know it wasn’t intentional, star.”

“Yeah, but… I know he’s sensitive. Should really get around to repairing that brain-to-mouth filter of mine one of these days…” You trail off, making an effort to stand, and regret it quite quickly as the world starts to spin again.

Moon’s hands brace you instantly, and a soft request fills your ears as you clamp your eyes shut again. “Let me carry you instead?”

“...Please.”

“Of course.”

The three of you make your way back to bed, and in spite of Sun’s previous statement implying he wouldn’t help you, you notice the way the room is already prepared for you. Bed sheets straightened, pillows situated, lights dimmed as low as they can go. The movie you’d paused is no longer waiting on the TV screen, the device having been fully turned off, and you know that Sun must’ve read somewhere that bright, flashing, moving images on screens can make your symptoms worse. (Who’d’ve guessed.)

He slips back out of your closet as Moon places you down in the center of the mattress, your just-in-case bucket dangling from his hand. His hands settle on his hips after he places it down near the nightstand, still-blacked-out monitor swinging slowly, surveying the room.

“Last time this happened, crackers and water seemed to take the edge off. Would you like to try that again? Do you think you can stomach it?”

He doesn’t mention his (over)reaction in the hallway, and you elect to drop it too.

“I… yeah. Guess I’ll try anything that might help.”

He’s out of the door and off to the kitchen immediately, and back with both items in hand by the time Moon gets you both settled in bed. Moon holds your water and you take the crackers as Sun takes his seat on the other side of you, Zero curling up at your feet. Your shaky hands fiddle with the packaging for a moment before black and yellow segmented fingers hover over your own. You pause, and Sun makes quick, silent work of parting the wrapper. You offer up a quiet “...thanks…” that receives no verbal reply.

A few crackers and a quarter cup of water later, you’re relieved to find your symptoms beginning to ease. It’s no magical cure, but you feel more stable than you did on your own out in the hallway, where you honestly might’ve slept had you been left to your own devices.

Two of Moon’s fingers press against your inner wrist. “Hmm… better, but not back to baseline. Are you still scared?”

You’re quiet for a minute, trying to search for the source of your fear. “Scared… that this is gonna keep happening at random, forever.”

Moon is quick to reassure you. “I’m confident that we’ll work out the root cause of these episodes one day.”

You mumble defeatedly through a mouthful of chewed cracker. “I sure fuckin’ hope so.”

Of course, it’s only once you’re content to let silence fall over the room that Sun speaks.

“You don’t need to fear it regardless. Even if this is with you forever. Because…” he releases a sigh, full of reluctance, but finishes his sentence nonetheless, “...it’s not like we’re going anywhere either.”

A/N: Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed. I'll be back tomorrow with part 2! You can also find my notes and commentary on this fic right here on Ao3. Links to the playlist and moodboard for [N]MbD can be found on this blog’s pinned post, as well as in the series notes on Ao3. Header Image Sources: x - x - x

[autistic-ben-tennyson]

After reading @rosaq’s post about Rose being a metaphor for a disabled adult instead of a child, I felt compelled to write my own essay about why she gets way more shit and way less credit than she deserves. While I’m not as big of a fan of SU as I used to be, it still has a place in my heart and was important to me. I relate to a few “problematic” characters in it such as Lapis and Pink Diamond and I think Rose deserved better than how Future or the fandom treated her.

The idea that Pink wanted a colony to prove her worth as an equal to the other diamonds and not just be seen as a joke hits hard for me. I’ve been there especially now where I feel like I have to move out and prove I can be a successful adult to my parents. The way the other diamonds treated Rose is very relatable to a lot of autistic people. They liked her when she acted goofy and made them laugh but when she struggled with social awareness, they yelled at, degraded and abused her by locking her away.

A lot of people, especially parents, only like autistic children when they’re the quirky kind that gushes about dinosaurs or astronauts, but flip the moment they inconvenience them. I’ve felt like my parent’s acceptance has often been conditional. They praised me when I was being goofy but dad would flip and make me feel like I was bad for having struggles with awareness or was hesitant to try new foods not to mention making me do Keto for almost a year because they felt it would “help” me. I’ve often felt babied whenever they lectured me over small things yet was also never given actual accommodation.

Some may disagree but I don’t blame her for leaving Spinel behind. It was wrong but because of her upbringing that taught her Diamonds were superior, she didn’t understand Spinel was an individual and not a toy. Rebecca was inspired by a toy rabbit she left behind when writing Spinel. To Rose, Spinel represents everything she hated about herself and how the other diamonds viewed her. To her, she was giving up a toy to prove she could be mature. I’ve been there before such as when I gave away toys or ditched certain hobbies such as paleontology, especially at a conservative school full of creationists I was forced to be friends with because my parents liked them, so people would take me more seriously. Let’s not forget that Spinel isn’t innocent and decided to wipe out all life on Earth and hurt Steven out of petty revenge yet never got as much hate as Rose did.

After reading some of @thewoollyviking’s posts, I’ve come to agree that Future felt very mean spirited towards Rose and that it seemed to just confirm the idea that she was a bad person incapable of change. I don’t hate Steven and relate to him at points too but he acted downright cruel by shoving her picture away and telling Greg who he learned had a similar upbringing that it wasn’t that bad despite being in Rose’s position and nearly dying because of how bad it was. That episode was poorly executed to be honest since most people don’t understand how curfew, chaperones and meatloaf can be abusive or stifling as I’ve seen some call Greg spoiled or “incredibly immature” for being angry about his childhood.

The way Steven acted in Future kind of reminds me of the Ultimate Kevin arc from Ben 10. A character who’s normally forgiving and willing to give second chances suddenly becomes very cruel and mean spirited. I’ve defended Ben from people who called him a narc or psychopath for deciding to execute Kevin but the writing in that arc was very mid. I don’t know if it’s due to the time constraints CN put on the show or was intentional but Steven never reconciled with or at least let go of his anger towards Rose and refused to emphasize with her despite being so similar. Rose never got a chance to redeem herself in life and thanks to Future will never be able to do so in death either. Everyone hates her and acts like they’re better off without her which is gross since it just confirms her self hatred that she was incapable of doing better.

Rose is a character that I relate to hard especially as someone with autism and is transfem. The way the diamonds treated her rings true to my own experiences with how people will act friendly to your face but then treat you as a joke and never give genuine respect or accommodation to. I’ve written more about how my dad treats me regarding my queerness here but I don’t blame Rose for acting the way she did. She needed help and was just treated as bad for her outbursts and was only appreciated when “cute”. I’ve thrown out things to prove I can be mature and don’t really hold her abandoning Spinel against her. The other characters are never given as much hate as Rose and I actually like Blue, mainly for her VA, but the other diamonds and Spinel did way worse yet got off far easier than Pink. People can dislike Rose if they want but it does say something about how the fandom views a victim of abuse who did a lot of wrong but did her best to change and struggled with loving herself.

[momentswithmani]

Understanding Black Men

The psychology of black men is distorted, and misunderstood through different lenses. Whether it’s through society, generational wounds, slavery, the entertainment industry, or families/communities. We commonly hear about the experiences of black men through wounded black women who had failed experiences, wounded black women who fail their sons, and the societal stereotypes that have existed for decades. It’s a rare occurrence that we hear the experience of being a man through a black man himself. Mainly, due to decades of them being silenced for speaking their truth, and them having a voice would threaten their manhood.

When getting to know a black man, these are some factors to consider: their upbringing, their childhood, their personality, their character, and their spirituality. Understanding the layers of who they are gives you an opportunity to learn them. Getting to know their nature usually comes with compassion, and empathy. Missing out on the opportunity to learn them for yourself, because of the outside noise, leads to ignorance. In order to formulate your own perspective, it requires introducing yourself with openness, considering that the way they interacted with the men in their generation could differ from how you interact with them in your generation.

When communicating with black men of different ages, it requires a different perspective. Comparing him to his low quality father is detrimental to how he will view himself growing up. Talking down on him will be detrimental to how he views himself. Many women will insinuate that it’s not that big of a deal, think about it this way….

Your mother can talk down on you: cursing you out, telling you you’ll never be anything, neglecting your emotional/mental needs, being manipulative, etc.

This behavior comes with a price. More than likely, you’ll struggle with self confidence. You grow out of your hobbies/passions. Your psychological development becomes stunted because of the abuse. Although men and women are built different biologically, the impacts of how men grow up are similar.

The way you speak to a man, can make or break how receptive a man is to you. If you speak negative energy into him, that becomes a wound to his heart. If you invalidate his emotional needs, he shuts himself down emotionally. If you invalidate his concerns/vulnerability, he’s less receptive to communication. If you brag to the world about how worthless he is, he will shut you out to dissolve himself from embarrassment.

We rarely credit black men of all ages for their spiritual responses to what they experience, whether it’s good or bad. This is due to how aware + observant they are. Because of how much they’re used to being neglected, it teaches them to neglect themselves. They are then forced into survival mode to fend for themselves, even if it includes indulging in detrimental behaviors. This plays a major role in them suppressing their vulnerability, which stems from the hardships they’ve been told they needed to endure in the name of “manhood”. Because black men are adultified at young ages, it strips away the humanity of how they exist.

It’s easy for us to be frustrated with black men, simply for existing. It is necessary to open a space for compassion + understanding regarding their stories. They are human beings, who are navigating life in the most effective way they can, or think they can, in the midst of learning who they are as boys, young men, and men. Their silence is mistaken for their lives being easy flowing. Their upbringing neglecting their needs at a young age is mistaken for privilege. Their physical appearance being fetishized, is mistaken for appreciation. If we’ve been given the ability to create a narrative on who they are for the past decades, they deserve to redefine the narrative based on their experiences, their manhood, and who they are as people.

[comradekarin]

I saw your Beyonce/Taylor Swift post and What's wrong with "comparing two queens that are killing it". line? Isn't that what it comes down to with female artists? Why can't we just appreciate all female artists instead of the competitions?

I’m going to take this as you asking this question in good faith so here’s the short answer: No. There is nothing inherently wrong with that statement, and depending on the context, I agree with it. But here’s the long answer:

A lot of fandoms do take it upon themselves to start unnecessary, unprovoked beef between artists, especially female artists of color (i.e the Cardi and Nicki drama), consequently ruining the love a lot of people have for those artists. However, the Taylor and Beyoncè comparisons have a few problems I want to address that aren’t actually new when talking about female artists of color and their white counterparts. Firstly, the whole comparisons only started because of the uptick of insufferable swifties online discrediting all of the work, effort, and impact Beyoncé has had on people before and today (and Beyoncé fans are simply responding to these ridiculous claims). Secondly, swifties also have a strange tendency to compare her exclusively to objectively better black artists (Beyoncé, Prince, Michael Jackson, Whitney Houston, and more) by diminishing their work and influence in order to prop her up. Noticeable so, they never really do this with Taylor’s fellow white peers. It begs the question: Why do so many swifties feel the need to put Taylor on a pedestal by discrediting arguably more popular, influential black and queer artists? While I do agree with the notion that female artists should be celebrated and giving the props they deserve, we can no longer pretend that black artists like Beyoncé don’t have to give twice the effort, twice the dedication, twice the energy, and twice the style in order to be given their credit. Meanwhile, an artist like Taylor is rewarded and worshiped for her white mediocrity and performance activism, never really pressured to perform to the degree other black artists are expected to, or forced to show allyship when it really matters. So for her fans to degrade Beyoncé’s high quality vocals, performance, and production—which has been consistent and improving over the years—and be rightfully told off just to resort to the corny “let’s just celebrate all women” is, in my eyes, the epitome of white feminism.

Taylor’s fans have even admitted that she isn’t the best singer, only marketing herself as a good “songwriter”. Ok, so an artist that can’t sing that well, can’t dance, has easily replicable lyrics we could get from other Indie artists, and has a very specific demographic as her fans is someone to be considered a legend? How is this considered the standard but influential black legends’ work are downplayed and diminished? Why does it hurt swifties to see black women be given their credit? Why does Taylor have to be included in every conversation (I.e the Lizzo situation at the Grammy’s where Taylor Swift fans took Lizzo’s appreciation for Beyoncé as hatred for Taylor or Beyoncé’s success on the renaissance tour being overshadowed by the eras tour). And when called out on this, why do her stans resort back to the fake “just support all women” take?

It’s why I can’t really stand by that one post up here that states we shouldn’t debate over female artists because at the end of the day, “they’re all female artists subjected to the harsh lens of the patriarchy.” That statement ignores the intersectionality present in the topic of female artists’ treatment in the industry. It ignores how the expectations of white female artists more than often than not tend to be different for woc artists. I see the “let’s just all get along” saying as a way to deflect from the valid criticism and complaints people of color have for white artists like Taylor Swift. And considering how Taylor’s online brand is playing victim and being the poor innocent white girl whenever she is called out on something, the behavior her stans exhibit are nothing out of the ordinary.

In summary, I don’t think comparisons between female artists are needed. Especially female artists in entirely different genres of music and style. But I do know a lot white Taylor Swift fans love to play the racism card and then hide behind misogyny to cover their tracks. Once again, something Taylor herself does WELL.

[thetwilightroadtonightfall]

so I’ve been trying to think of the best way to talk about Skuld’s fate for a while now and I think I’ve finally got it. My feelings about how she could be handled are a bit complicated (maybe even controversial? lol) but I hope I can make myself clear. This is essentially gonna be the post I point to whenever and if ever I need it later in the future. Thanks in advance if you read this!

If for whatever reason it’s confirmed that Skuld isn’t Subject χ and she gets together with Ephemer in canon (which I don’t believe will actually happen, but who knows), I do genuinely think there’d be something incredibly poetic about both of them leaving behind a legacy together.

Skuld as Subject χ is a super intriguing concept that I want to see get played out in canon, and even outside of that possibility, I would really love to just see her go on her own journey, have her own story where she can grapple with the events of khux in her own ways. But as someone who also happens to love her and Eph’s dynamic, I like to indulge in the possibility of them founding Scala together too.

Believe me when I say that I’m very skeptical of Skuld getting the credit and spotlight she deserves given the track record of how female characters are treated in this series. It would break my heart if Skuld got turned into an accessory or got shafted or worst case scenario, is used only to kickstart the Ephy lineage and nothing more outside of that. She deserves good, solid writing no matter what her fate is, I’m sure we can all agree on that at least.

And then there’s also the question of whether or not Nomura would ever establish a canon romantic relationship, and if he even should do that in the first place. I think it would be great, as long as it’s written in such a way that it doesn’t impede on the other types of relationships he’s already established. It could delve into some interesting new territory that can highlight the themes of kh, and make them even stronger and more profound. But you don’t absolutely need romance in order for that to be accomplished, ya feel?

Do I love Skuld and Eph together? Yes. Do I think they should be together (romantically) in canon? Not necessarily. You can both enjoy a ship AND recognize the nuances involved.

But anyway anywaaaaay, long disclaimers aside, these two characters have been through so much together…they witnessed two apocalypses. They’ve suffered the loss of a dear friend at their hands, along with their other friends as a result of horrible circumstances they had no control over. They stayed side by side as their home collapsed around and on them. But they also laughed together. They looked out for each other, stood up for each other. Encouraged and comforted and teased each other so they would smile.

From the very beginning, to the very end, they had each other over and over again. Clinging to hope with incredible resilience. From party members, to friends, to leaders. They’re both wonderful characters who I have no doubt would support each other throughout the rest of their lives, just as they always have.

I’ll be fine if a romance between them doesn’t become canon, in fact I’ll probably be pretty relieved. But I can’t deny that the idea of the two of them being entwined forever, bonded by the tragedies they’ve been through, yet also by all of their happy times and shared memories, is a beautiful thought to me.

Surviving to see the other side and building everything from the ground up again together, and seeing the legacy that follows their love, is a story worth telling, in my opinion. In the end, if that’s a story left to us fans to tell, that’s more than enough for me. We have so much to work with. Regardless of what Nomura and/or the rest of the writing team choose to do, I don’t need them to be a canon couple to enjoy the profound love and care they have for each other.

TL;DR - Whatever happens with Skuld, I’m down for the ride. As long as she’s present, period, I’m here for it. Just…please for the love of god, let her be written well. I miss her so much and I need all these years of loving her character to pay off

[hawkogurl]

Tell me good things about Harry so that I'll like him more.

I don't really like him for some reason, but to write good Norman & Harry one-shots/stories, I need to actually like Harry (and loving Norman but not liking his son is ridiculous). I thought you'd be a good person to ask since you're writing a fic about him and seem to like him a lot.

I mean you don't have to answer this if you don't want to, but I assume, like me, you'd love to rant about your favorite character.

Have a good day!

So I’m gonna warn you in advance, I have severe insomnia and I haven’t slept in more than a day so I’m not firing on all cylinders. This is also why this is taking so damn long to write. Also none of this is necessarily directed at you specifically if I mention something. It’s probably a general observation.

While I do think it’s valid to dislike him for a lot of reasons—I think it’s valid to dislike him on the grounds of what an absolute piece of work James Franco is alone—there are some things I will posit for my son boy. It’s worth noting that one, he is seventeen years old in the first movie, he is a baby, and he dies at either 20 or 21. Additionally, most of the more overt shitty things he does are things he’s shown to have developed as a direct result of Norman, namely his treatment of MJ being an explicit result of Norman being a misogynist. And on the topic of reasons I think he’s liked, I know for a lot of people his reaction to MJ commenting on Norman, while not pretty, is just so, so real to a lot of victims of similar abuse.

While at the end of the day I do sort of think that trying to quantify morality sort of misses the point of the Raimi trilogy’s core cast. Whether or not they’re good people is less important than the fact that they are human, with human flaws and human problems who are all for the most part trying to do their best, or in cases where they actually are acting maliciously like Eddie and, not to slander your blorbo, Norman, acting maliciously for very human reasons. I think Harry is a great example of this.

And I do think Harry is a better person than he’s generally given credit for. He maintains his 616 trait of not having it in him to kill, even having a line in the novels where MJ mentions he couldn’t kill a frog in science class. He keeps a lot of the 616 core of his character when it comes to fragility and gendered tropes, having a complex relationship between traditionally female and male tropes as used in those movies. He is subversive as a male character. But that’s getting off topic, even if I could go off about that for hours. He’s more respectful of MJ’s romantic decisions than most secondary male leads in fiction, maintaining a platonic relationship with her long after they’ve broken up. Norman is a weapons manufacturer, yet Harry’s job in OSCORP has him working on accessible green energy with Otto. He’s far more loyal to Peter than people want to give him credit for, resisting his hallucinations and the revenge he’s obsessed over for two years at that point for no other reason than the fact he loves Peter. And it’s important to me that you know the original ending of the third movie didn’t have him going to help Peter after being told how Norman died but instead after seeing a shattered photo of himself, Peter and MJ. That boy cares so damn much. While poorly executed, the amnesia arc in the third movie is very important in my opinion because of what it’s meant to demonstrate. Harry isn’t a malicious or malevolent person at his core, he’s just deeply traumatized and struggling.

And I know well that all that is buried six feet deep beneath his mountains of issues, but that’s half the reason I like him. I think it’s easy to admire Peter, and he’s well written and deserves it, but I don’t think it’s any coincidence that there’s such a decent amount of affection for Harry on tumblr specifically. He’s the character with the subversive gendered tropes, the canon schizophrenic, the one I think a lot of people connect with out of this feeling he was treated unfairly. And I think it’s reassuring to see something that reminds you that no matter how much has happened, no matter how many mistakes you’ve made, it isn’t too late. You can always choose to be better.

There’s also a fantastic video essay about Harry and the stages of identity development somewhere on YouTube that I think is absolutely fantastic because that also is a massive part of his character. Along with his genuine psychological issues, his development of identity has been stunted. He’s soft spoken and tries to make himself as unobtrusive as possible in the first movie, basically molding who he is to try and please the people around him. He swings in the opposite direction in the second movie, where he’s perfectly capable of interacting like a normal human person at Peter’s birthday party, he almost deliberately paints himself as obnoxious as possible around Otto. I’ve written full posts about that before, so I’ll keep it short as the idea that he twists who he is to make himself feel safe. And feeling safe isn’t necessarily what’s actually safe for him, but often just what’s he’s used to. There’s a sense of completion to him simply deciding to go and help Peter. He’s choosing who he wants to be for himself and nothing else, choosing whose love actually matters to him.

I’m happy to talk about the guy in messages or asks upon request. Also have like 293 posts this length or longer about the dude tagged under harryposting he is so important to me. I should probably make a specific analysis tag.

[friendlyneighborhoodamara]

What Your Favorite Zelda Ship Says About You (for the games I’m familiar with)

General:

Link x Zelda (ZeLink): You are a firm believer in the inherent beauty of two souls coming together, again and again, through reincarnation after reincarnation.

Hylia x Hero: …see above. Also, you read the Skyward Sword manga.

Ocarina of Time:

Link x Zelda (ZeLink): You think classic Disney Princess movies are more feminist than given credit, and that Cinderella is more badass than she’s given credit.

Link x Sheik: You were absolutely fucking pissed to learn that you can only play as Sheik in Super Smash Bros. Also you are almost definitely some flavor of trans.

Link x Dark Link: Looking back on your childhood, you can pinpoint Ocarina of Time as the beginning of your crippling addiction to “Enemies to Lovers”.

(Child) Link x Saria: You really like Disney Channel movies where the popular kid’s girlfriend is nice to the loser protagonist.

Link x Malon: You just want good things for Link. And really, who wouldn’t? Also, you’re a horse girl.

(Adult) Link x Nabooru: Your favorite Champion is Urbosa.

Link x Ruto: You love the scene in Dragon Ball where Goku accidentally proposes to Chi-Chi but holds up to that promise when they’re adults.

Twilight Princess:

Link x Midna (MidLink): You are a firm believer in the inherent eroticism of getting dunked on. 

Link x Zelda (ZeLink): You are a firm believer in keeping things canon and keeping things wholesome. 

Link x Ilia (IliaLink): You believe that the Hero of Time settled down with Malon.

Midna x Zelda (Midzel): You hypothetically want a girlfriend who can kick your ass but realistically you just want to be bridle carried. Also, you read the manga.

Midna x Zelda x Link (Midzelink): Your solution to a love triangle is ALWAYS polyamory.

Midna x Zant (MidZant): Your AO3 history is about 50% Reylo fanfiction.

Zant x Ganondorf (Zandorf): You definitely got your start in the Star Wars fandom by writing Kylo x Hux slash fic.

Skyward Sword:

Link x Zelda (ZeLink): You have gotten into at least five heated Internet arguments about Skyward Sword being underrated. Also you cried at that ZeLink shot in the Tears of the Kingdom trailer.

Hylia x (Original) Link (Hylink): You cried at that other shot in the Tears of the Kingdom trailer of maybe Link’s metal arm holding maybe Hylia’s arm. Also you read the manga.

Link x Ghirahim (GhiraLink): You are still pissed Ghirahim wasn’t in Smash.

Link x Groose (GroosLink): Your mom told you that that mean boy on the playground pulled your hair because he likes you and you never let go of that.

Zelda x Groose (Zeloose): You are painfully heterosexual. Alternatively, you are Groose.

Breath of the Wild:

Link x Zelda (ZeLink): You are a firm believer in the inherent romanticism of shared trauma and Knight x Princess dynamics.

Link x Mipha (MiphLink): Your ideal relationship dynamic is one-sided, tragic pining. Press F to pay respects.

Link x Paya (PayLink): You just want good things for Paya. And really, who wouldn’t?

Link x Sidon (SidLink): You’re always a slut for beautiful cinnamon rolls, too good for this world, too pure.

Link x Revali (RevaLink): You love the Tumblr meme that’s like “You want to fuck me so bad, it makes you look stupid.” Also, you think people are too mean to Revali.

Zelda x Revali (ZeReval (?)): You are heterosexual.

Urbosa x Zelda’s Mom: You are a strong supporter of two women who are sick of a man’s bullshit.

King Rhoam x Literally Anyone: You think Endeavor deserves a redemption arc.

EDIT: the sequel

[swbbb6]

Regarding Scorch. A tangent…

I did not enjoy that ending for Scorch. I didn’t understand the use of Scorch to begin with, but I kept it to myself, because I foolishly wanted to believe it would/could make sense somehow.

But that didn’t happen! So it’s time for a fixit; a look into what (I think) it would take for it to make sense 😅

For starters, I don’t think it was a mistake to use a member of the Delta Squad; they are often regarded as a precursor to The Bad Batch, so we know they’re extremely capable commandos. Even more deadly than Arc troopers. It could have easily been a great parallel between the two special operations teams.

Having said that, if it had been up to me, I would have used Sev instead of Scorch; reason being, (aside from Scorch canonically having a big personality that was completely absent from his tbb portrayal) Sev went missing on Kashyyyk at around about the same time order 66 was given. Which begs the other question; if you’re going to use Scorch, where was the rest of Delta Squad?

When Sev went missing, the rest of Delta Squad wanted to go back for him, but they were ordered to leave him behind. In all the confusion that was order 66, it would have been a convenient time for the Tantiss scientists to round up as many clones as possible, from as many varied backgrounds as possible. I know that sounds like a stretch, but it’s the fact that the rest of Delta Squad was ordered to leave Sev behind that’s suspicious to me (when considering what Palpatine’s men were secretly doing to clones). A member of the famous Delta Squad would be a big get for them.

Moreover, it was something Crosshair said that stuck with me: when he told the rest of The Batch about the experiments being conducted on Tantiss, and the CX program, he said he couldn’t be brainwashed because he’s defective. But then why did they keep trying? Why did they keep torturing him? Especially after they got ahold of Omega the first time, why not kill Crosshair at that point, if he really was useless to them?

My theory is, the stronger the victim, the longer it takes to fully break them down. I could imagine Sev would hold out longer than the regs, and depending on how thorough they had to be, it would also explain why this once super-badass was reduced down to (a completely incompetent) Henchmen #1.

I’ve seen it mentioned that the light behind Scorch’s helmet didn’t go out when he fell, so he could’ve survived; I’m a little skeptical tbh, but sure, I’ll allow it. Go ahead and give The Bad Batch their happy ending (they deserve it!) but then (if we continue to say it was Sev and not Scorch), they could have given us a post-credit scene, or a May The Fourth/Revenge Of The Fifth teaser of the rest of Delta Squad finding Sev. Delta Squad is very self-contained, and isolated, even more than TBB, which would explain why it has taken them so much longer to find their missing brother; they don’t have the same resources TBB has (Rex, mostly).

So many people have asked “why include Scorch at all?” “That wasn’t Scorch!” “It literally could’ve been anyone else!” And I agree! I think with more background, a lot more questions could’ve been answered in a way that actually made sense, for both The Bad Batch, and Delta Squad, and made the fans happy in the process!

Not to mention maybe we could’ve gotten another Republic Commando game, or even a spin off series for Delta Squad??

[dailycharacteroption]

Roleplay Ramblings: Alien Anatomy and Equipment part 5

(art taken from Starfinder Enhanced, credit goes to the original artist)

Conclusion

Starfinder likes to play pretty loose with the specifics of alien anatomy, as well as how aliens interact with their own technology and whatnot, and that’s fine. The decision lends itself just fine to making sure no matter what weird creature you play as, you almost always have the same advantages and disadvantages as any other character with a few exceptions based on what would be interesting to tell a story with.

Sometimes, however, it can seem like they lean too far into that, particularly with the fact that literally only one species in the entire game has a different atmospheric requirement compared to other species. I mean, heck, you would think that the cephalume, which live in the liquid methane of a gas giant would be one, but oh no, they’re plantlike and get their energy from sunlight and other sources of ambient energy.

Now, to be clear, Nothing that I’ve gone over has any actual mechanical effect in the game unless you want it to in your games, such as requiring weapons to be refitted in addition to armor when it comes to making sure that your character can comfortably wield it.

However, it is all useful things to consider when describing a character of a species doing things, be it in-game, with art, and so on. It’s one of those additional details that helps make a world feel lived in, with the needs of different species being met on their own terms rather than just being strange things that just so happen to exist alongside mostly humanoid aliens.

This is especially important given the “Star Wars cantina” feel that players and devs like to point out, because unlike Star Wars, you actually get a chance to have those weird background Men and Beasts do something. (Seriously. Have you ever noticed how 90% of SW media centers around one group of humans and like, one token alien? Droids get to do more in Star Wars than most life forms.)

I guess the whole point I’ve been trying to make this week is that a system and setting like this deserves the time and energy it takes to flesh it out with your powers of imagination as both players and GMs, and that asking and answering questions like these is part of that process, even if the Devs concentrate their own energy elsewhere.

Anyway, I think that will do for today for me, but I hope I’ve inspired you. Tune in next week for more character options!

[brokenlovesong]

Paul Holden WIP because I think the first chapter is gonna be done soon :)

(yeah its turning out to be multiple chapters... what have I done)

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Once his little group of Socs entered their teenage years, the football team became an option and they all practiced with each other to make sure they were at the top of their game. So much so that Paul was only a freshman when he made it onto the high school team, something unheard of. His coach said it was because he knew Paul was a hard worker, that he had a lot of expectations, and that he had to live up to them. He couldn’t just be mediocre or even above average. He had to be the best of the best or else why was he taking a risk on a freshman.

Coming onto the team as a freshman was big news that spread throughout the high school. Paul knew people now, and people knew of him. The high school football team was held to pretty high regards around town. With a team that won as many games as their team traditionally did, it guaranteed the top schools were falling over each other to nab the players for their undergrad classes.

But Paul was still a stranger. He wasn’t blind to the cautious looks parents gave him that weren’t given to his white teammates. He had to work twice as hard to be given half the amount of credit because if he wasn’t the best of the best, he was dragging the team down and his position should’ve been given to someone more deserving, someone considered less of a “risk”... and not in terms of just being a freshman.

No one understood what it was like. Paul would spend every moment of free time working out to strengthen all his muscles or perfecting his passes. Bob put in some effort. He knew he was a sho-in to make the team once he entered high school. But didn’t understand why Paul put in beyond that.

Everything changed the following year when Darrel Curtis joined the team. An East side Greaser kid who no one expected to make it on. Hood didn’t even usually attend tryouts. Football was a sport that required lots of money, from the uniforms and gear to the overly expensive varsity jackets everyone sported. It wasn’t a sport for families who weren’t so well off.

Paul knew of Darrel. The west side didn’t tend to mingle with the east side, especially in school. But Darrel had managed to surpass his class status and become a golden boy. He got good grades, better than one might expect from a Greaser. Some of the best in the grade, actually. And he had a charm to him that not even the most popular girls could resist. He was someone everyone said would make it out of Tulsa.

Paul had to admit, he was a bit envious. He may not have gotten the same level of scrutiny Darrel did, but he still felt like he didn’t belong and he was yet to be treated as if he did by the team. He was always the last to know when the team wants to run plays outside of practice or if someone’s parents are gone for the weekend and they’re throwing a massive party. But here Darrel came, strutting in and was “one of the guys.” He wasn’t even from their world (though neither was Paul.)

THE FIC IS NOW UP! CHECK OUT “EVERMORE A STRANGER”

[secretress]

Something you need to know about yourself that is blocking your manifestations + Advice

YouTube | Masterlist

Tips | Paid Readings

Not a tarot card reading, only based on my intuition.

Author’s note,

Remember, no one can take away our manifestations that rightfully belong to us. You are worthy of your manifestations and deserve to blossom in your desired way.

Credit

PART 2: 4-6. Everything was too chaotic and harder to read because i channeled so much!

Pile 1:

Protect your energy.

I hear right off the bat.. someone has a cheating ex who they keep going back to..(this pile energy is making me so depressed). You must cut them out immediately, I understand you think this person is going to change but they won’t, and they won’t in the future. I see in the future, if you do decide to stay, they will mentally kill you and drain you to the point where you want to end it.. please leave. This relationship isn’t worth it, and it is certainly not worth your precious heart. Stop manifesting for them to change because they won’t, and they aren’t worth it at all. Not even one dot. They don’t deserve your energy nor your prayers. Everything about them isn’t good, baby, just leave, okay?

Now, my intuition is screaming at me to say this message before I give you some advice. ‘’My dearest, you no longer need a vampire like such. They are no good and don’t deserve the passion and the love you put into them. seek comfort and delicacy elsewhere. Find it through your passions, loved ones, and in oneself. Seek an adventure elsewhere and vouch for yourself instead of them. scream their name on top of the hill and leave it there.. forget them as for they are the wicked of the dams. You must not be weak for them as your heart is the purest, find yourself once more and surely you will find a worthy lover. Mark my words as this is the truth and know you are the most trusted and powerful one of the current situation.’’

My advice is to leave, yes, but that may be hard from what I channeled for you, so I will recommend something that may help. I hear that they’re clingy and draining and I hear you’re the type to message back even though you don’t want to because you feel bad. So, I want you to distance yourself each day, they message you? message at night. The next day, they message again? Message after 3 days. Keep at this and remove your attachments, you can remove this through meditation, affirmations, or a desired technique you prefer.

If you’re truly up for it, you can block them immediately and not entertain the thoughts about them because at the end of the day, are they worth being in your mind? No. intuition says they gave you a big apology and you’re debating whether or not to go back, don’t. just don’t.

I’m going to give you a surprise you deserve to know. When you block them, unfriend them, etc., your life will become better, and I don’t mean to be kind. I mean that you’re going to find the right person for yourself after a year of transforming your life for the better. Whatever you thought about using to improve yourself, do it!!! That’s the key and then bam, you get what you desire!!!

Pile 2:

Accept your manifestations

Your manifestations arrived to you so why wont you accept? Why are you waiting for the right time or diving timing? What are you doing, sweetheart? Accept your manifestations already.

There is no such as you do not deserve them, if they came to YOU, then you DESERVE it. It is that simple.

Your pile is very simple and less complicated than the right, you’re on the right past so why did you decide to yourself that you don’t need it or want it? Just take the offer that you were given, yes, I am speaking to the majority of you who decline your offer with getting a promotion or a job proposal, and I know some of you are scared, some think they will think you are not qualified, but you know those are you fears, don’t let them manifest. Tell yourself this, ‘’why am I no longer scared? Why did I get the offer?’’ this will trick your logical mind and your logical mind will find the solutions for this to manifest.

For the rest of you, stop complaining. I hear some of you are complaining your manifestations didn’t come in the way you wanted. Things happen for a reason first, so perhaps you need this to learn a lesson, that is what you’re thinking, right? No. manifestations come in all different forms to us, and we don’t even realize that is the best way for us until the end.

Pile 3:

Be your own person

You need to stop watching a lot of videos associated with manifestations, stop searching and looking up the best way to manifest. Stop doing other people’s techniques. Start making your own techniques. You keep doing everyone’s technique and then you question why it doesn't work. I can see that you are restless and agitated by your results and you are trying to understand why nothing is coming to you. ‘’Why aren’t my manifestations coming to me??’’ My love, manifestations are all about persistence and belief. If you assume that they aren't coming to you and you tell yourself, ‘’okay I’m going to try this technique, I hope this work.’’ How are you supposed to elevate yourself in the right frequency to get your desires?

My advice is to make your own technique and assume that is what will work. Because as I mentioned before, manifestation is all about belief and persistence. If you believe that your manifestation technique will work, then it will work. So, stop killing yourself over it and start to ignore the 3D, because that is merely a mirror and it’s not important. Assume the 4D is yours and that’s all you need to worry about it.