#they could never make me hate either of them

[necroliberty]

So because this is amazing and because I am hyperfocusing on Gravity Falls. Let me share a bit of Amelia's long-lost sister, Kelly Ness. Okay, they aren't sisters anymore, but still.

Kelly fell on the blue grass of a random dimension. She wasn't the type to keep note. The atmosphere was different, somehow safe and dangerous at the time. But again, she didn't particularly keep a note on things like that. Kelly just made a bee line to a mailbox inside either various stickers added to the tin. Mabels had a knack to give stickers to everything. But Kelly just gave them a cursory glance as her right eye gave her the info on each. Giving the coordinate to each stickers place of creation. She should make note of getting stickers for respectives Mabels. Sometimes, it was the only thing that could tell Kelly where to actually send the damm things. Eventually, she opened the mailbox with a specific key and looked through the letters. Some were boring ads that she threw around. No one needed those. Some were Stanfords incredible writings, making sure to say exactly who and where it should be sent. Other times, it was Stanley's doing letters of his own. They were often hard to send back. Mabels were also there. It was obvious with how much stickers and colors her letters had. She practically never had to read the content to know exactly where to go. A bit more, and she was wondering if Mabels just knew the mailbox wasn't actually magic. The rarest were of Dipper and McGucket. For whatever reason, these two either didn't bother make letters or weren't the type to fall in a portal. "Or maybe they both want to be left alone?"

She blinked, and her right eye started to smoke under the intense heat. Forcing Kelly to keel over and grip her eye as the letters floated around her. Smoke from her eye, holding onto them with annoyance. Through her right eye, she could always see something the one who spied. Well, what he saw, to be specific. A mirror was right in front of the demon. A man in his early 20s with brown curly hair broke through by antlers that seemed to either spill ink or petrol from every imperfection in the wood. His eyes were big, staring down the mirror for some kind of stability. Not to mention his long tail swiping at the air behind him. His clothes were still looking like a preacher from a school play. He looked incredibly annoyed. This was a very bad day. "Vulture, do I need to remind you not to insult the likes of me so blatantly."

Kelly wanted to scream that this was stupid, and she was allowed to ask questions. But she also knew better. Days like these, you needed to placate him. So Kelly still held the expression of pain and started to add a quiver to her voice. "I am sorry, I didn't mean for my words to cause harm. I was a fool to even think it in the first place."

The demon stared at his own reflection, closing his eyes too to be able to see her. He vaguely shook his head, making some his hair made of leaves fall to the bed surrounding him. "No, not a fool, just a bad day." He looked down at his hands and feet. His hands were now made of wood, and his feet were deer hooves. He hated this form with such wrath. But his eyes told that he knew better than to take her acting as proof. He didn't trust Bill anymore than she trusted him. He finally closed his eyes again.

Kelly sighed as the pain stopped. She breathed slowly and normally not to let the right eye see her weak. All the letters she had dropped were now safely in her hands, and she looked through them again. Filing them into various pockets in her messenger bag. Making sure she didn't put a letter for the wrong timeline or dimensions.

When she was finally done, she walked away until she could find a loophole in the dimension. Leaving it behind to give letters to family and friends.

This is Kelly Ness as a Mailman. They don't get uniforms because she is the only one.

My smol mini series about the drifting stars au is here!! Ft letters to Dipper!! May do more depending on the reception~

[deeplyshalllow]

Glinda gets what she deserves at the end of Wicked

I don’t necessarily mean this in an all negative light either, Glinda’s ending is bittersweet – sad, but hopeful. But she does not deserve an all out happy ending at the end of the musical.

I don’t know if I’m gonna be crucified for this, but here goes.

Glinda in Act 2 is a key part of a fascist regime. She doesn’t just live in it, she isn’t forced to take part in it and she’s not working as a double agent (like Fiyero). She knows what they are doing to the Animals (which includes separating infants from their mothers and putting them in cages, and making Animals so afraid they literally forget how to speak), she knows and loves people it is hurting and yet she continues to actively promote it.

(I won’t point out the connections to real world situations, but I’m sure you guys can all think of examples and think of how you feel about people who are active participants in helping such regimes.)

We see she knows all this too. We see she excuses it for her ego and the power:

Glinda: Do you think I like to hear them say those awful things about her? I hate it!

Fiyero: Then what are we doing here? Let's go, let's get out of here!

Glinda: We can't leave now, not when people are looking to us to raise their spirits.

Fiyero: You can't leave, because you can't resist this. And that is the truth.

Glinda: Maybe I can't. Is that so wrong? Who could?

Elphaba: No, of course you never! You're too busy telling everyone how wonderful everything is!

Glinda: I'm a public figure, now. People expect me to...

Elphaba: Lie?

Glinda: Be encouraging!

And if one could possibly argue (weakly) that, given she’s not actually doing any of the regime’s actual violence, just keeping people’s hopes up she’s not as bad as those who are, she gets worse:

Morrible: Well, we'll just flush her out and force her to show herself.

Wizard: But how?

Glinda: Her sister

Morrible: What? What did she say?

Glinda: Use her sister. Spread a rumour. Make her think her sister is in trouble and she will fly to her side... and you'll have her.

Even if one argues that Glinda is somehow not clever enough to realise that they’ll end up killing Nessa, she sure as hell knows it will get Elphaba captured. And there’s no way that Elphaba being captured won’t lead to the execution of her best friend. Yes, she’s heartbroken, yes, she might not have said this when emotions weren’t running high, but it doesn’t make her terrible words less deadly (and bear in mind Elphaba hadn’t even done anything to hurt Glinda! It was Fiyero who chose to go with her).

Glinda only really starts realising what she has done in March of the Witch hunters, when Nessa is dead, Fiyero is tortured and presumed dead and Elphaba has descended into madness – all because of her own action. And, kudos to her, this is when she decides to change, she immediately goes to Elphaba and tries to warn her about the Witch Hunters, apologises and ultimately Elphaba trusts her with the Grimmorie and to continue her legacy (which she immediately does by overthrowing the Wizard). She has started down the track to good but she still has a long way to go.

I am not the first, nor will I be the last to point this out but “Goodness knows the wicked’s lives are lonely, goodness knows the wicked die alone”, sung by Glinda,is clearly not about Elphaba. Elphaba was not wicked, nor did she die alone (literally Dorothy was in the room and metaphorically Glinda supported and loved her). Glinda is singing about herself, Glinda knows she has been wicked, Glinda knows that it is her own actions that have lead to the “death” of her friends.

So what Glinda is left with is a chance to do good. A chance to live up to her name and make up for what she’s done. A chance to use what she’s most talented at, making people like her, to continue the legacy of her best friend. Despite everything, Elphaba does trust her, if she didn’t she wouldn’t have left her with this responsibility.

Glinda: Fellow Ozians, friends, we have been through a frightening time. There will be other times and other things that frighten us. But if you let me, I'd like to try to help. I'd like to try to be... Glinda the Good.

This is why she is going to “try” to be Glinda the Good, because she hasn’t been good yet. She has learnt a lot of very hard lessons through the narrative, been dragged kicking and screaming out of her selfishness, ego and giving into her worst impulses and is grateful for a chance to repent. And honestly, I’m sure she will suceed.

And one last thing:

Elphaba: I only wish...

Fiyero: What?

Elphaba: Glinda could know that we're alive.

Fiyero: She can't know, not if we want to be safe. No one can ever know.

I know a lot of people take ire with this line. But Fiyero, always the best strategist of the group, is right. The last time Glinda was trusted with important information it led to a death and two more people nearly dying. She has not earned that trust yet.

But, remember, Glinda isn’t stupid, Glinda is in a position where she’s going to have to think more and more. Glinda has presumably seen her roommate get wet before, she saw Fiyero’s reaction to the rumour, no matter how much searching happens Fiyero’s body never turns up, how long is it really going to take for her to connect the dots? Sure “Glinda can never know” for sure, but she sure as hell can be comforted by the fact she’s almost certain her best friend did not melt from a bucket of water.

[lostinlovingrevery]

Just a thought and no offense but I think Logan just wants to be in love and feel loved in return.

(This isnt proofread and came out as rambling so have fun trying to read it and decipher it! 😅)

So WE ALL know that Logan can be flirty, and that he may have had a period where he was a bit of a manwhore (*cough* 70s Logan *cough*)

I feel like that period though, and any other flings, one night stands, etc whatever was less out of lust and more of a desperation to feel SOME kind of human connection bc the mans so lonely and has been treated like a soldier, a weapon for so long that hes desperate for human connection, even if it makes him end up feeling depraved afterwards. Post-nut clarity wakes him up next to some girl he met at a bar, and guilt sinks its teeth into him because he doesnt even know her name, much less actually LIKE her. The man was born in the 1800s, he may have grown with time but you cannot tell me theres not some inkling of being a gentleman- and wanting to find someone you truly love, hidden in there somewhere. I think overtime he may fall into this routine, believing he needed to be a walking sex magnet, gruff, cocky, whatever have you because hes convinced its the only way he can have a connection with someone, even if its for a few passionate moments under bedsheets, and an awkward "that was nice. Bye"

It only fuels his self hatred, convincing him that he really his just an animal, looking to get his sick desires out, eat, fuck, sleep, survive.

When we see him in the X movies, as a cage fighter he is brutal and rough and he doesnt seem to have a caring bone in his body yet he still manages to find himself caring about this young girl who stowawayed in his trailer, and does help her, even if he acts like this version of logan he created. Someone who doesnt care. But he cares. A lot.

Its not until he meets YOU, that he starts to wonder if he got it all wrong. Kind, beautiful, smart YOU.

I fully believe that logan just wants a partner. One night stands, flings, what have you, were just him lying to himself, desperate to feel something other than hate. After he lost his memories, and he began just wandering, the concept of love was lost on him. And lust wasnt there anymore either. He was approached by women, perfectly fine, pretty women, all the time during his time cage fighting, bars, etc. He turned them all away- completely opposite of logan 30-40 years ago (my timing probs not right on xmen lol) who was convinced the only way he was living was if he had ass next to him every night he went to sleep because he was lonely. This version of logan, lost, angry, wanted nothing to do with people. Some of it the repressed feelings coming out from his past that he doesnt even remember. He was convinced then that he had to be alone. Becoming a lone wolf that bared his teeth at anyone who tried to pet it. Secretly though, deep down although he wouldnt admit it, there was that deep desire, that he always felt in his 200 years, that he just wanted to find his mate. He'd call soulmates bullshit if you asked him, but the moment he meets you, hed know that it was real, and that maybe god cursed (gifted) him the ability of healing and practical immortality just so he could find you. And hed do it over and over again, the pain and suffering and loneliness, if it meant you would be the endgoal.

Logan is a pack animal. He needed a family, to protect, and cherish. When he meets and ends up at the x-men, his demeanor and attitude changes quickly to something similar to a dog that snaps at you when you pet it only for it to whine and whimper "im sorry, please dont hate me, i just dont know how to accept love.". Hes still wary, because hed never KNOWN a family before. Put aside his memory loss, the closest things he had to a family was a creep of a brother, and a woman who said she loved him under false pretenses (i still dont like you kayla even if you say it was real). He barely knew his parents, and even then that was a lie because his father wasnt even his biological father. Yeah, Logans life was pretty damn lonely, so its no wonder the man is cautious of anybody and anything.

The moment you come into his life though, that bitterness, anger, and meaningless flirting goes right out the window. Hes serious about you. Hes usually cautious, nervous around people but he meets you and its almost like he threw all those imaginary rules he has for himself out of the window.

Look at how he was with Jean in the movies. He barely knew the woman, they barely shared ANY lines in the movie yet he was almost completely devoted (dont get me started on that storyline). Trust didnt come easy to the wolverine. And Kayla- their relationship just shows how much he wants love and to be loved. I never seen origins but a lot of gifsets and read the synopsis of the plot, but i think he had a feeling with Kayla he couldnt trust (remember how he says hell never go against his gut again?) But he so badly just wanted that connection he ignored all the warning signs and did everything to build a life with this woman who not only tricked him, but put him through unimaginable pain both physically and mentally. (Look I REALLY dont like kayla but i do feel bad for her because stryker did have her sister captive). I know stryker is the evil mastermind here, but god imagine trying to find love with someone, only for it all to be a farce, even if they claimed they did love you the entire time- the intentions from the very beginning was far from love.

Oh but when he is in love with you. From the moment he met you, it wasnt love at first sight exactly, more like a feeling that you were it. Hes all about you. He sticks around, under the pretense that he just needed to make some money first, doing some missions for charles, keep an eye on rogue. He cant admit its because he wants to stay close to you. Hes like a feral cat taking shelter in your shed. Stays away at first, cautious of your spspspsp, but curious nonetheless. Completely ignores the first bowl of food you put down for it- or so you thought because when you came back it was completely devoured. It takes weeks of food and spspsps before it finally warms up to you, but after that first contact with your hand and its head- good luck ever getting rid of it. Not that youd want to 😊

Logan becomes a shadow to you, once you become something akin to friends. (Its really more than that but no ones addressed it). He teases you and flirts with you, and its something you think he does with everyone, until Ororo tells you that he only does it to you. Sometimes he just sits in your company, other times hes curious about what youre working on, not wanting to start the convo, but does things like leering over your shoulder (which he may or may not be doing just to he close to you and get a good whiff of the smell of your hair). He stresses when you go on missions without him. He slowly opens up about his past to you when he begins to get his memories back. Trusting only you (and maybe charles) with the truth ablut the man he used to be, and still is.

When your feelings finally do come out in the open though, however it happens, that first kiss, the first time you make love, etc etc. Logans a different man. I mean, hes still that cocky, grumpy person we all know and love. But he carried himself differently. Hes confident and wiser, hes comfortable, and hes happy. He found a home, his pack. And maybe after countless conversations about his past, the things hes done, and the comforting words and understandings you give him, he starts to learn that he isnt so bad, because if you love him, YOU, the most wonderful person hes ever known in 200 years, love him despite all of his violence and hatred and slight whoreish tendecies back in the 70s...then he must be alright.

He doesnt need to worry about his past anymore, when hes got you, right there with him, promising a loving future together.

[456x001]

okay huge essay incoming:

and this is based off a post i saw earlier by my awesome mutual @midnight--sadness (her blog is awesome btw) where she talked about gi hun’s ability to forgive in ho. so i’ll start off by prefacing some of the great points she made about gi hun’s trusting nature and his selfless ability to forgive others:

we’ve seen time and time again how trusting gi hun is even if it’s to a fault. it’s simply in his nature to trust and love and to care about other people in the selfless way he does. given that, i think he could forgive in ho. if he sees in ho actually working to make a change and make things right for the betterment of others that have been wronged by the games (and whether or not in ho will or actually even wants to is what we’ll be getting into later), i believe he can forgive him. despite all the horrible things he’s done, despite the unforgivable, irredeemable mistakes he’s made. he’s more than justified in not forgiving him but i’m just saying he might because if anyone could it’s gi hun. he’s made the point time and time again that he isn’t like the masked men and would never become hateful in the ways they are.

now let’s talk a bit about gi hun’s relationship with young-il. gi hun's worry for young-il during the games is so raw and heartfelt. he’s not just strategizing or playing to survive-he genuinely cares about young-il's well-being, even in a scenario where survival often demands selfishness. his willingness to risk everything to make sure young-il was okay shows how deeply gi hun values connection and loyalty. in ho, as the frontman, watches all of this unfold. seeing how much gi-hun cared for his alter ego “young-il" must have left a mark, even if in ho wouldn't openly admit it.

when the truth comes out that young-il and the frontman are the same person it's going to hit gi hun like a ton of bricks. gi hun will have to reconcile the caring, vulnerable young-il with the cold, calculating frontman. it will once again challenge everything he believes about people and their capacity for change. in ho, for all his control and detachment, won't be immune to this confrontation either. gi hun's unwavering belief in him as young-il could be the thing that cracks his carefully built armor.

this dynamic is so layered with unspoken emotions, unacknowledged bonds, and so much potential for heartbreak and redemption. it’s no wonder they gave us at the edge of our seats. now here’s the crux of the discussion. do we think gi hun’s belief in young-il's goodness, his inherent belief in the goodness of people could be enough to pull in ho back toward redemption?

we don’t know the answer to that yet, but i will say this. we’ve seen the final defying act of the villain sacrificing his life at the end for the greater good many times before. however, redemption doesn't always have to end in self-sacrifice. it could mean in ho finding a way to dismantle the system from the inside or choosing to protect gi hun and others while carving out a new path for himself. gi hun's belief in young-il could serve as a bridge for in ho to reconnect with the part of himself that still values humanity, without needing to face total destruction.

in a show like squid game tragedy feels inevitable but in ho's complexity gives him the potential to break free from that cycle of the self-sacrificial villain. if the writers explore his humanity further, there's room for a story where redemption and survival coexist— where he doesn't have to lose his life to find the good within himself.

it’s okay to hope. even in a world as bleak as squid game. personally, to me that feels a lot more compelling than the trope of self sacrifice that we’ve seen in the past. it gives in ho a chance to truly live with his choices, grow from them, and navigate the complexities of redemption, rather than taking the "easy" way out of a grand gesture. it’s a more challenging story to tell for sure but it would also feel satisfying.

i know it may seem like i’m trying to paint a fairy tale but here’s why i think it could work.

squid game thrives on subverting expectations. taking in ho down a path where he survives, changes, and potentially becomes an ally or disruptor within the system could be far more groundbreaking than another shock-value death. it could challenge the audience to grapple with forgiveness and morality in ways that are more impactful than a tragic ending. gi hun's unwavering hope in humanity could become the key to helping in ho see his own worth and capacity for change. in ho is such a layered character, and his survival would be more shocking in a show as grim as squid game. it would challenge the bleakness and give the story a deep emotional payoff. the shock value of how he survives and redeems himself could carry as much weight as a tragic death.

i really value the complexity and emotional depth in this show gives us in within the narrative and i can’t wait to see how hwang dong-hyuk continues to challenge the bounds of storytelling and reach beyond the obvious in season 3 as he’s done with these past two seasons.

[void-speaks]

🌧"Hm, we don't really have those kind of luxuries nor the necessity for them, so I just dive head in even if its pouring. I do enjoy rain quite a lot. It's refreshing."

🍳"Well, I'm not exactly the best, but I do know how to make the most basic of things. Sigh, I do wish I had the chance to learn how to cook something more cool and interesting, but oh well. Oh, surprisingly enough, I do. I used to hate any and all kind of chores before, but now it's just something you can shut off your mind for and do on autopilot. Mmm, probabaly omelets. No particular reasons, I just think it's neat."

🧼"It's not like we get much of a choice. In this economy, we shower whenever we can. I do enjoy showering, but I haven't gotten many chances to bathe before, so I can't really tell anything. Again, it's a miracle if we find gel in this situation."

❌️"Obviously I would. It does depend on who is telling me what, but just in general, I would. Hmm... Probabaly Crane. He's seen some shit and has a good base of knowledge about the world, more than me and Aiden have."

🏳️‍"Well, it's hard to say right now. I can't really imagine anything that would make me give up, but there's probabaly something. Like, maybe if I was in complete despair? I don't know, hard to say."

📖"Gosh, don't even get me started on books! I really, really love books. I've always loved reading books even as a child. I mostly favored fantasy and detective novels and sometimes romance I suppose. Queer romance specifically because. Well. Guess. I wouldn't say I have a lot of opportunities to read in that sense that new books that I haven't read are a rare thing to find right now."

⛸️"I'm not... too into sports, to be fair. Would parkour count as a sport? Probabaly not right now. Hm... I guess Carnage Hall fights would be considered a sport? In that case, I don't really follow that stuff at all."

😷"I have an average immune system, so I don't get sick too much. Well, 'staying at home' right now isn't exactly an option, however, when I get sick, I tend to not overwhelm myself with chores, but don't stay in bed all day either. Well, medical masks are surprisingly hard to find, and just regular clothing pieces won't do much, so I tend to stay away from people or be very careful around them."

🥼"No, I don't. Hm, what kind of uniform... To be fair, and don't quote me on this, but Renegade uniform looks sick as Hell."

🥂"Huh, I never really thought about it. I guess I just pat myself on the back or don't really acknowledge them at all."

🛴"Parkour. It's probabaly impossible to get around on a bike in this environment, but it would be nice if I could. Traffic rules aren't really a thing right now, so eh."

🕰"Hm... Now that I think about it, we don't do that too much? Or I suppose we just use the sun as our guide most of the time. Or Peacekeeper sirens or church bells if it's in Old Villedor."

🥰"There's many things that can make me... Well, not happy, but bring some kind of positive feelings for sure. As for loved... I don't know how to answer that."

🐇"I don't. I prefer to live in the now and here. Believing in this kind of thing would be an escapism method for me, and I prefer not to do that."

���"I'm getting tired of saying it, but there's not much choice we have nowadays. I'm starting to sound like my grandma... I think. But, if I had to chose from all the songs I know, my current choice would be that tape that Aiden showed me recently. I don't know its name, but it goes like... 'Some people cheat, some people sin, but ohhhhh I play to win, tu-tu-tu-tu-tu-tu-u-u-u-u-u,' and so on. Sorry, I'm not the best singer. Mm, no, not really. Never had a chance to learn. Probabaly the violin. I heard it's a difficult instrument, which is one of the things that intrigues me about it."

💽"Yes! I like collecting books, newspapers from the 'old times,' audio tapes and stuff like that. Really to collect information. But especially books. There isn't a particular reason, I just enjoy doing it. Or I suppose the reason would be that I want to know as much as possible about Villedor and its life and how life was for other people in the hot of the apocalypse."

🧋"Tea. By God how much I love tea. Especially black tea with thyme. I can't even explain it, I just do. My second top tea is from a specific brand, but it's also black tea with apple and... and some other berry. I don't know its name in English. Oh, that entirely depends on the season and how I'm feeling. But generally, I lean more towards warm or hot drinks."

🌻 random in-character questions

an ask game where, instead of replying from your perspective, you answer as if it's your original character/muse/self-insert/etc. answering the question ✨

🌧️ "When outside during the rain, do you use a raincoat, an umbrella, or something else? Do you enjoy rain?"

🍳 "Are you a good cook? Do you enjoy cooking? What's your favorite thing to cook?"

🧼 "Do you prefer to take a shower during the morning or evening? Do you like taking baths? What's your favorite scent of shower gel?"

❌ "Would you do something that someone told you not to do? Why? Is there someone you'd actually listen to more than everyone else?"

🏳️ "What will make you give up?"

📖 "What kinds of books do you read? Do you have a lot of time to read?"

⛸️ "What's your favorite kind of sport? Do you follow sports closely or don't care at all?"

😷 "How often do you get sick? Do you stay at home when sick or do you end up going outside to, say, get some groceries? If you go outside, would you wear a mask?"

🥼 "Do you have to wear a uniform somewhere? If yes, how do you feel about it? If no, what kind of uniform would you love to wear?"

🥂 "How do you celebrate you accomplishments?"

🛴 "What's your preferred way of getting somewhere - own car, public transport, a bicycle, or something else? How well do you follow the traffic rules?"

🕰️ "What do you use to check what time it is?"

🥰 "What would make you feel happy and loved?"

🐇 "Do you believe in other dimensions?"

🎺 "What kind of music do you mostly listen to? Do you know how to play an instrument, and if not, which one would you want to learn to play?"

💽 "Do you collect anything? Why?"

🧋 "What's your go-to thing to drink? Do you prefer cold or hot drinks?"

[thanosscross]

In my club - Choi Seung Hyun/ T.O.P x reader- Part four

Summary: With tour coming up, Seung Hyun realizes he can't leave without knowing if he'd ever see you again, leading you to a very exciting Monday night

Warnings: Nothin really :)

Whenever you woke up the next morning, you were immediately holding your breath, noticing that you and Seung Hyun were tangled with one another under the blankets, Seung Hyun's arms wrapped around you tightly as if you were his own personal teddy bear. Trying to take a deep breath in, you mistakenly took a sharp inhale, causing the man who was sleeping so peacefully before to jolt awake thinking something was wrong.

Looking around Seung Hyun sighed, letting his head fall back onto the pillow, loosening his hold on your waist, but keeping it draped over your hips tiredly "Everything okay, beautiful?" He asked softly, his voice deep and gravely from just waking up and most likely drinking the night before. "Y-yea" You mumbled nervously, making your way out of his bed, your cheeks burning with a blush as you rushed downstairs, desperate to get away to process what you just woke up to. Seeing your panicked state, Ji-Yong was quick to wrap his arm around your waist pulling you back towards him "You woke up with him, didn't you?" He smirked, teasing you slightly "You know..He likes you, y/n, Seung Hyun has been different since he saw you in the club the first time" He explained, the smirk never leaving his face as you blushed, glancing towards the bedroom door where you heard Seung Hyun's footsteps walking around. "We're just having fun, it's not like that" You giggled, finding it sweet Ji-yong was so concerned with helping his friend find somebody. Before you could leave for downstairs, you were stopped by the same person you were trying to avoid "Hey, can we, go somewhere and talk?" Seung Hyun asked sheepishly, not liking the way you now made him nervous, but he persisted, knowing their international tour was about to start and he didn't want to risk leaving without knowing if he'd see you again.

Sitting at the small private coffee shop, you glanced around at everything smiling "It's so pretty here.." You stated as you took in all of the flowers and how the sunlight bounced perfectly off of the decor outside making a rainbow hue reflection on to the tables. "How do you think they thought of this place?..Like do you think it was just a they got everything as they went or do you think they planned this all out..because it's breathtaking" You whispered in awe, tilting your head slighting gasping whenever you your perspective shifted the image you saw through the crystal decor on the table, seeing a beautiful detailed engraving of the stars and moon. Seung Hyun couldn't help but watch in awe as you swooned over his favorite 'chill spot', coming here often before and after tours to just read and think of new raps, here you were treating everything like it had been your first time seeing true beauty. "you know..this is the most you've spoken to me sober..I was starting to think you didn't like me unless you were drunk" He teased, hiding his feelings to what he thought was perfectly, and anybody who wasn't you would've noticed immediately Seung Hyun was starting to lead on to something more with you, but you were oblivious, to flustered and enthralled with everything around you to notice, your life had changed significantly in the last few days, going from spending your free time either partying with your friends or sitting in your apartment that you shared with said friends, watching tv shows and different youtube videos you found, to partying with a famous K-pop group and sleeping with one of the biggest rappers in k-pop currently.

As you both spoke, you had agreed you didn't want the fun you were having to end so soon, so you agreed to follow them on tour, I mean, free V.I.P tickets to concerts, plus getting to see Seung Hyun more, and a vacation? Where were the cons?

A con? Flying. You hated it, couldn't stand it, between your fear of heights and the getting motion sickness very easily, flying was like your mortal enemy. Walking onto the plane you kept your headphones placed on your head, trying to keep yourself distracted from the fact you were allowing yourself to become trapped in an enclosed space that was soon to be thousands of the feet in the air, with absolutely no escape. Sitting down in your seat you glanced around, it was first class, allowing a lot more room for you, but it didn't change where you were. As the plane took off you tried your best to stay calm, digging your nails in the armrests as you squeezed your eyes shut tightly. Ji-Yong was the first to notice you, followed by Tae-Yang, Dae-sung and Seung Hyun having a conversation a row ahead "Seung hyun" He whispered leaning forward trying to get his friends attention, knowing if he got you through this, you'd most likely warm up to him when sober. Eventually as the plane had a bit of rough turbulence Seung Hyun turned his attention back towards the others, Ji-Yong shooting him an annoyed look before nodding to you. You resembled somebody going on a scary rollercoaster waiting for the drop, you were curled up in your seat holding onto the armrests with your head turned towards the side, your face scrunched in fear as you squeezed your eyes shut tightly, trying to calm your breathing and not freak out as the plane got higher and higher. You yelped feeling two hands rest on yours "Beautiful.." Seung Hyun whispered, you turned your hands to hold his, not wanting him to think you were ignoring him, but you were too terrified to move or speak, Seung Hyun squeezed your hands gently, smiling softly "There you are, I thought we lost you there for a moment, why didn't you tell anybody you were scared of flying?" He asked, waiting for the seatbelt to actually shut off before undoing your seatbelt, switching you spots before having you sit back down on his lap as he hugged you, he wasn't sure what you were feeling, but he knew most times he felt anxious, all he really wanted was a patient hug. Your hands gripped onto his jacket tightly, almost like you'd fall out if you didn't, Seung Hyun just held onto your body gently, talking you through the flight, even getting to a point where you felt comfortable enough to open the window shade to see the sky "See?...Sometimes.. you have to go through scary things to get to the beautiful things" He whispered quietly pointing towards the clouds.

You were somewhat calm the rest of the flight, once you were landed you were all rushed off to the arena, watching the boys rehearse for the first time was an experience for you, they had purposely had you move from V.I.P to the barricades for different songs, claiming that they had to get an idea of where they needed to be to interact with fans. Seung Hyun couldn't help but notice the way you watched them, your face mimicking the same face you had whenever you were at the coffee shop with him, watching in pure awe and amazement as they moved and sang. As they finished their rehearsal you noticed Seung Hyun's eyes on you the entire time he made his way back down to you "Y/nnnn! Y/n! You like? You like, Y/n?" He smirked strutting down the stairs before stopping in front of you, smiling at your flustered expression, looking everywhere except for him, you giggled loudly before nodding "Yes, yes I like, You guys were awesome!" You giggled, grabbing his arms gently as you bounced on your heels with excitement, not being able to wait for the actual show.

Whenever it got closer to the time of the show Ji-Yong and Seung Hyun had a security guard walk you to your seat in V.I.P, standing not far from your seat as he followed the instructions given. As Seung Hyun and the others walked out he quickly met your eyes, sending you a smirk and wink before making his way past the V.I.P section. It was the first and coolest V.I.P you had ever had, the section being on an actual part of the stage they boys were on, as you listened to the boys you couldn't help blush whenever you heard Seung Hyun's deep voice go through the speakers as he rapped for Fantastic Baby, purposely turning his head to look at you anytime he'd say 'wow, fantastic baby'. Seung Hyun wasn't the only person focusing on you throughout the show, anytime the boys had free time between verses or whenever they didn't have a verse in a song they'd be in V.I.P taking turns dancing with you and others, As Seung Hyun sang along to Turn it up loud he spotted Ji-Yong dancing with you, spinning you around as you giggled softly hiding your face quickly as you noticed Ji-yong's dancing had landed you both on the giant screen behind you.

Seung Hyun watched raising his eyebrows as Dae-Sung shook his head, taking your hand from Ji-Yong, spinning you around to face, placing both hands on his chest before holding your hips swaying to the beat of the music, you had to hide your blush as you made eye contact with Seung Hyun's curious gaze. As the song ended and Knock out started to play, Seung Hyun made his way over to you, making sure to shuffle his feet to the beat, stumbling purposely as he started his verse, waving his hand at the side of his face before Ji-Yong took over. He was quick to take your hand in his, pulling you closer to him before mouthing the words 'let me teach you' to Dae-Sung, he wrapped your arm around his neck and shoulders as he pressed his hips into yours swaying to the beat, smirking at he brought the microphone to his lips, feeling confident as he stayed on beat while hitting every note to his second verse. By the time the song was over you were sitting back down trying to hide your face from the obvious blush, watching as they preformed more of their songs, some of them you recognized from the club. You were having a lot of fun, starting to realize maybe you should let yourself get drunk a little more often if it meant meeting people like Seung Hyun, and the boys.

As the show got closer to the end you noticed the beat to the song from the other night start to play, watching Seung Hyun smirk with Ji-Yong they stood on their marks, getting ready for the cue of Bae Bae to start so Ji-Yong could start. You smiled to yourself, swaying your body to Ji-Yong's first and second verse, watching him move slowly down the stage reaching for other fans' hands before Seung Hyun started rapping, hopping and spinning to your chair again, whenever Ji-yong started singing again, Seung took his chance to grab your hand gently, swaying the both of you until the chorus started again. You knew there were three songs left afterwards, Tonight, If you, and Last Dance, thanks to Dae-sung you were learning their song names as they preformed them.

Listening to If you and Last Dance you kept your eyes on Seung Hyun, feeling a wave of relaxation wash over you whenever you heard his soft voice actually sing instead of rap, your stares didn't go unnoticed though, almost every boy in the group noticed your longing glances that you gave their friend anytime he was singing.

Hearing Tonight play for the first time you were quick to start moving with the music, giggling as you saw Seung Hyun nodding along with your movements as he started to make his way over, stopping a few way he smirked motioning you to come over to him. You stood up nervously, looking into his eyes it felt like your nerves were vanishing, forgetting the circumstances and how many people were actually watching you slowly made your way over to him, thankful for V.I.P serving alcohol during the show, you weren't drunk yet, just tipsy enough to start ignoring your anxieties. As you spun your hips you squealed feeling Seung Hyun take your hand in his pulling you to his chest as he looked at you smirking "Just like at home right?" He asked, moving hips with yours as you rolled them forward with Ji-yong's verse. You just nodded smiling as you spun around, giggling as he raised both of his and your hand up to help you spin, as the ending chorus came, you jumped around in his hold, his hands steadying your hips before he held you down on your feet before pulling you close raising the microphone "Tonight?..Such a beautiful night" He whispered before sighing into the microphone, spinning his hand in yours to motion you could sit back down, as you turned away he smirked "Goodnight" He whispered before blowing a kiss into the microphone and walking towards their original mark to exit and enter the show.

As they were lowered back down you walked in pure shock, their bodyguard ghosting his hand over your shoulder as he led you off of the stage and back towards the backstage door that was kept locked for obvious reasons, as the boys saw you walk through the door they rushed over "So!? What'd you think? First BigBang show!" Ji-Yong cheered, laughing at your shocked expression "Wow...just wow" You replied looking at them all "It was amazing! You guys were amazing! Oh my god!" You smiled cheering, Seung Hyun blushed, taking your compliments personally as if he was the only the one in the room "You were amazing! Whenever you and Seung Hyun started dancing together for tonight!? You two really made it feel like a night club!" Dae-sung shouted excitedly, holding your hands tightly, you smiled hugging your friend tightly "Thank you! I was nervous at first, I don't know how you guys are so confident with preforming! That was terrifying having so many people watching!" You giggled, pulling away from the hug to look at Seung Hyun, a blush painted brightly on his cheeks "Why didn't you tell me you could do more than rap?" You asked playfully, immediately losing all confidence and becoming flustered again whenever he smiled sheepishly placing his hand on your lower back "Seung Hyun is shy when he sings!" Tae-Yang explained, smiling whenever his friend glared at him for putting him on the spot "Don't be..it's really pretty" You smiled, feeling confident enough to take his hand in yours "What else do you have to do?" you added on, holding his hand close to your chest, pressed against your heart as you glanced around for any signs of somebody waiting for them "We have to get our things together, and go back to the hotel" Seung Hyun explained, pressing his lips to your forehead gently causing you to become a flustered mess again, he couldn't help it, he liked watching you rush away blushing and stuttering, stealing glances at him before you both found each other again.

As you got back to your floor on the hotel room you froze watching all four boys continue to walk past you "Excuse you, if you want me here, one of you better be bunking with me" You stated, blushing whenever Seung Hyun took it upon himself to turn his friends back around towards their room as he made his way back to you "Sorry, beautiful" He whispered, you went quiet as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders leading you into your now shared hotel room.

--

You like? ;)

--

Taglist!!

@ag022123

@acehasmyheart

@heartz4rubyy

[remedyturtles]

for the writing ask meme: disaster twins bc i am nothing if not predictable aaaaand ur pick of 8, 22, 29 or 42 if u would like :3

thank you my dearest russothy @rbtlvr for the prompt! this got away from me and also went in so many different directions lmao... snugs hope you like it :D

wordcount 2.7k, pre-series

22. "...you knew?"  29. "Tell me the truth."

"I've definitely got a unicorn horn." Leo said, holding up the puzzle piece. 

"Which one?" Donnie propped up the box lid. 

The two inspected, comparing the angle with the reference, covered in a multitude of unicorns.

"Hard to tell." Leo set the piece aside, with his other collection of possible key points. They'd only just finished the border, spread out the bedroom floor. They were twelve years old. They were both grounded. They were absolutely and intolerably bored. 

No TV. No phones. No lab time for Donnie, no skateboarding time for Leo. No amount of pleading with Raph or Mikey to smuggle them entertainment worked because they weren't happy either.

So it was the unicorn puzzle. And any other way they could pass the time. 

"It's your turn." Donnie said, flipping over a few middle pieces and sorting them into piles by colour. 

"Sure. Truth or dare." Leo plucked another horn-like piece with a pleased noise and tried to slot it with his first. It didn't fit. 

"Truth." Donnie said, after a moment.

"Wimp."

"I stand by my answer."

"Fine." Leo sighed, annoyed. "You're no fun. What is the last thing you looked up on the internet?"

"Pssh. Something absolutely genius, I'm sure." Donnie said. "But alas, we will never know, as I do not have my phone on me." 

"Hogwash." Leo said, mimicking his voice, "As if your eidetic memory doesn't know. I'm insulted on your own behalf that you would insinuate such a thing."

Donnie mentally ran back through his most recent searches and struggled not to cringe. A victorious smile spread over Leo's face, before he'd even said a word. 

"How'd you know it was going to be something stupid?" Donnie complained, ducking his head to pretend to sort his pieces more intently. 

Leo tapped his lip, milking his success. "Come on. You've got a thousand bookmarks on your computer for all your nerd stuff and overflowing shelves of paper books and manuals. If you need to Google something, then it's the bottom of the barrel questions." 

Donnie mumbled under his breath.

"What's that?" Leo leaned forward over the puzzle, grin growing to shit-eating.

"You heard me." Donnie's face flushed. 

"I'm not sure I did, because I'm pretty sure my genius prodigy Donatello knows exactly how many millimetres are in a centimetre." 

"I was just making sure!" Donnie complained loudly, snapping a hand out to push at Leo's face and shove him back to his side of the puzzle. "It's my turn now, shut up. Truth or dare?"

"Dare." Leo answered, because he always said dare. 

"Shocker." Donnie deadpanned. "Fine. Eat a puzzle piece."

"Okay." Leo picked up the unicorn horn. Before Donnie could stop him, he placed the piece on his tongue, swallowed, and showed a decidedly empty mouth.

"Oh my stars, Leon, I didn't think you'd actually do it." Donnie said, stunned with the heights of his idiocy. 

"You dared me." Leo shrugged. "What did you expect?"

"We needed that!" 

"You cannot pretend this is my fault. You literally just told me to eat it." 

"I hate you. Alright, Curious George, it's your turn." 

Leo barked a laugh. He rearranged his collection of unicorn horn pieces, forever missing one now, and said, "Truth or dare?"

"Dare." Donnie wasn't a wimp. 

"Bet." Leo hopped up and immediately began digging in a drawer. "Close your eyes. Don't open them until I say so."

Instant regret. So much instant regret. Donnie didn't obey, tense all over, watching Leo with wariness. 

Leo found whatever he was looking for, keeping it behind his back when he turned around, and said, challenging, "Are you switching?"

If Donnie switched to truth, Leo would ask something really awful, and he'd have no choice but to answer as penalty. So Donnie scoffed, like that was a ridiculous question, and shut his eyes. 

Leo’s footsteps got closer and he sat in front of Donnie. He said, calm and mischievous, “I’m going to touch your face.”

With the warning, he didn’t flinch when Leo carefully removed his mask, placing it in Donnie’s hand. Then there was the sound of an uncapped pen, and a whiff of marker. 

“Hold still.” Leo said, fingers bracing Donnie’s head and setting the marker tip to his face, waiting a moment for him to adjust, then began to draw.

“Urgh.” Donnie said, holding still beyond his fingers fidgeting in his lap with the mask, eyes closed but recognizing the movement of the pen in two arcs over either eye. 

“There.” Leo said, removing the pen. “We match.”

Donnie opened his eyes to see Leo directly in front of him, something warm and fond before it eased back into gremlin mischief. “Feel beautiful?”

Donnie got up and looked at himself in the mirror. Dark red marker stripes were drawn carefully over his eyes, matching at the face grinning behind him. 

He rolled his eyes. He stomped over to the same drawer and said, “Truth or dare?”

“Dare.” Leo said, already taking off his mask. 

Donnie found the black marker. “Close your eyes.”

Obediently, Leo shut his eyes, grinning too hard that it caused his forehead to wrinkle while Donnie moved his head around to get the perfect sharp and thick eyebrows. He put genuine effort into making them look good, because Leo had too. 

“Done.” Donnie said, releasing his hostage of Leo’s head.

Leo leapt up to the mirror and gave a wolf whistle. “Damn! That’s not bad.”

“I didn’t come here to fuck around.” Donnie replied. Looking at both of them in the mirror he wished he had his phone so he could get a picture. He flashed a peace sign anyway, like they were taking a selfie, and Leo automatically mimicked it. For a moment, he forgot the situation and grinned back at his twin through the mirror. 

Then he remembered why they were stuck in a room doing puzzles and dropped the peace sign, shuffling down to sort through the stacks. Leo watched him, the small frown made quite more serious by his impressive brows, then hopped over the half assembled puzzle to his side. “My turn?”

It was an invitation to stop, if Donnie wasn’t feeling it anymore. But it wasn’t like they had anything better to do. “Truth.”

"Do you regret it?" 

Donnie glared at him. 

Leo stared back at him, completely serious. 

"I'm switching. Dare." Donnie said. Whatever horrible thing Leo could concoct would be better than answering that. Even if it meant he had to do it, no matter what. 

"Fine." Leo shrugged. "I dare you to tell me the truth."

"That's cheating." Donnie lifted his lip in a sneer.

"Is it?" Leo challenged. There wasn't a specific rule against it. 

Donnie didn't answer him, turning to try and poke his various pieces together. Neither of them spoke for a while. The tense atmosphere reigned. 

"I regret that I got caught." Donnie said, eventually. "Which probably isn't what I'm supposed to feel." 

"So you'd do it again, if you felt you couldn't get caught?" Leo prompted, knuckles white in his lap. 

"Only one question. Your turn. Truth or dare." 

"Dare."

"I dare you to answer a truth." Donnie said, sharp. 

Leo's eyes narrowed. He couldn't claim it was cheating without being a hypocrite and he knew it. He rolled out a slow, "Fine. Ask."

"Why'd you take the fall with me?" Donnie was been dying to ask. Leo hadn't even known what Donnie was up to, and yet he stood in front of Dad and swore he'd been helping. 

Leo said, "Pssh, I thought you were gonna ask something hard. So you weren't grounded alone, obviously. And it'd be so boring if I couldn't hang out with you anyway. And so I could bug you about what the hell you were thinking. So. Truth or dare?"

Donnie would eat every piece of this puzzle if he didn't have to answer another truth. "Dare." 

"Wimp." Leo said, shark-grin. 

"Your standards for cowardice seem to change from moment to moment." Donnie said, mouth dry. 

Leo could easily pull the same move and insist he answer a truth, but with the tit-for-tat complete, to abuse the power would break the game. "It's fine. This one'll be real easy," his gaze hardened, "especially since it's what you should've been doing all along. I dare you to take me with you next time."

Donnie exhaled slowly through his nose, swallowing. He avoided Leo's eye, pretending he was super interested in placing his puzzle pieces. "Fine." 

"Promise?"

"Yeah, whatever."

He could feel Leo staring at the top of his head. He irritatedly poked a piece in place, the leg of a unicorn, and asked, "Truth or dare?"

"I'll do truth if you do." Leo bargained. 

A rare offer. Despite his annoyance, he couldn't help but take the bait. "Deal."

"Perfect. Hit me." 

Donnie could tell Leo was already formulating his next question. Unfortunately for him, Donnie got to ask first. "Tell me something you've never told anyone."

Leo grimaced. He didn’t answer for a long minute, eyes visibly ticking back and forth as he thought.  Then laughed, a little nervous, and said, "Alright. Okay." 

The nerves were interesting. Donnie poked, almost fascinated, "Scared?"

"No, I just –" Leo bit his lip and glanced up, fidgeting with a bunch of sky pieces. He was definitely nervous, breath quickening. "I've wanted to say, actually. So this seems as good a moment as any."

Oh, this was actually serious. Weird. Made weirder by the drawn-on brows. Donnie waited for more information before assuming anything. Leo delayed longer, killing time, and only to falter at Donnie's expression. 

"It's uh, not a big deal, but. I figured I should … tell you. That. I'm gay." Leo held his breath at the end of the sentence.

"Right." Donnie nodded. 

Leo blinked at him like an owl. "... you knew?"

"I… figured." Donnie evaluated the situation and determined a different reaction was needed, judging by the clear anxiety of Leo's face. This hadn't been what Donnie was expecting, because why would Leo be nervous about his reaction. "I did not consider it worth a second thought. You are my twin. There is nothing about you that I wouldn't accept without question."

"Oh. Okay." Leo inhaled shakily then let it out slowly. "Cool. That's cool. Don't tell anyone else yet, okay?"

"Like you even have to ask." Donnie scoffed. There was a code about these sorts of things, after all, twelve years in the making. He wasn't about to break their sacred bond now. "Do you need a hug?"

Leo crawled directly over the puzzle to climb into Donnie's arms. He squeezed so hard it squashed the air out of his lungs. He mumbled in Donnie's ear, "Thanks."

"I love you. If anyone has a problem with it, send them directly to me." Donnie's grip tightened to the point of Leo letting out an 'oof' too. 

"Love you too." Leo gave another squish then pulled back, a puzzle piece stuck to his bare leg. "Your turn."

"Now?" Donnie complained. "After we just had a moment?"

"And we're about to have another moment, bucko." Leo was close enough to poke Donnie directly in the plastron, pretending to be stern even as he was still a little shaky. "Your turn."

"Truth." Donnie sighed, fulfilling his end of the bargain. 

"Why'd you do it?" Leo asked, immediate. All young indignation, eyes shining with left-behind hurt, and a more incandescent worry that was mirrored in all the annoyed glares outside their door. 

“Scoff.” Donnie avoided his eye. “Surely you do not need to hold me at metaphorical gunpoint to ask that question when you already know the answer. I wanted uranium.”

"That's not why you did it." Leo said, expression all the more severe by the painted brows. He insistently poked Donnie in the middle of his plastron again. "I know you didn't want uranium just to have. There's always a purpose, a plan. Why?" 

"Multiple uses." Donnie said, tightly, through clenched teeth. "It doesn't matter. No one wants me to have it because they think I'll give myself radiation poisoning. Because it'll put me on a watch list. Because when I tried to sneak out and meet up with a seller I got caught. So it doesn't matter, because obviously no one here is going to let me."

"You're right about that, because you will give yourself radiation poisoning and sneaking off when you're a twelve-year-old mutant to meet up with some sketchy seller was a terrible idea. That's still not what I'm asking. Why?" Leo said, because despite pretending for everyone else that he was in on it the whole time, he was actually just as opposed as the rest of them at his failed scheme.

Donnie physically pushed Leo away, since he was still so close. "It doesn't matter! Okay! I can't do it, so it doesn't matter!"

"It matters to me. Because I'm asking." Leo insisted, hands braced backwards onto the puzzle and separating out the few pieces they'd gotten together. "It's truth, you have to answer."

"I could switch to dare." Donnie said, annoyed.

"Then I'd dare you to tell me the truth."

"That's cheap and you know it."

Leo just stared at him, still leaning back and waiting. Completely dead set and expectant that Donnie would crack. 

"There's nothing more to say." Donnie said, swallowing and feeling how his throat was sore. "I have projects that only a radioactive isotope can satisfy."

"Okay?" Leo prompted. Waiting for the expected info-dump. 

"Why do you care?" Donnie snapped. "Weapons. Big, powerful weapons, that would obliterate anyone who dared mess with our family. And – a-and unlimited power. And heat. For our home. Okay? Are you happy? Because we don't to have those things anyway, so it doesn't matter."

Grim triumph washed over Leo's expression, and he leaned forward to ask, "Do you think we'd want that at the expense of your life?"

"I wasn't going to die!" Donnie exclaimed. "And if I have the power to make our lives better, safer, more efficient, shouldn't I take it? Shouldn't I push the laws of the universe to give us everything we deserve when we're trapped underground like rats?"

"That stuff is pretty important, but it's not more important than you." Leo said, slowly. 

Donnie smacked his hand against the floor and blurted, "That's what I'm good for, so yeah, it is!"

Leo's expression flashed and he gave a low growl. He lunged forward and caught Donnie in a roll, sending the two of them tussling into the dresser. A loud thud made the wall shake. Donnie kicked Leo in the shins. Leo elbowed Donnie in the solar plexus. 

"Boys!" Splinter knocked loudly on the door. "No killing each other!"

"Yes Dad!" Donnie and Leo recited together, stalled mid-fight, waiting for the footsteps to disappear before struggling apart.

"What was that for?" Donnie rubbed his plastron, scowling.

"For basing your self worth on what you provide for this family." Leo straight up threw puzzle pieces at him, scattering unicorn bits all over the carpet. "Don't be ridiculous. You're so much smarter than that. If we only let people in because they're useful then I woulda been kicked out years ago."

"That's not true." Donnie protested. 

"That's not the point." Leo rolled his eyes. "It doesn't matter who's useful or not. You're one of us forever. No take backs. You don't have to superfit the lair with big weapons and make us completely self-sustaining or whatever. Dad only let you start doing upgrades because you were having fun. If you're doing it to earn your place here then I'll burn your lab down."

"It's fun." Donnie said, quickly, because Leo had an affection for fire that should not be tempted. "Fine. I hear you. I will be satisfied with projects that bring me joy and not radiation poisoning. Can we finish this puzzle or did you actually swallow that piece?"

Leo's severe expression melted, and he reached behind Donnie's non-existent ear and revealed the unicorn horn piece flipping over his knuckles. "Looks like you had it rattling around in your big head this whole time."

"Hah. Caught you." Donnie grinned. "If you cheated on that dare now you gotta do one that's twice as bad." 

Leo swore.

[nerdishpursuits]

And this is one of the countless reasons I love chatting about Mafin with @midniteowlet: she's my very own toma a Tierra and grounds me, so I can approach things more rationally.

Upon concluding our debate of the current turn of events on the show, Mafin on the whole and their narrative? I've come to look at things as follows. The show very much reflects society as it is: a sad state of affairs where good people hurt and unsavory characters often prevail. The fact that we want everything good and wholesome to triumph at every turn? Idealistic, not realistic. Not to mention lofty expectations actually prevent one from truly appreciating the show, with all its ups and downs and winding roads. And personally, I'd like to keep enjoying it, without getting dragged down the utopian rabbit-hole.

For the most part, the representation we get is actually well crafted: Mafin feels organic, tried and true, and the chemistry between them is undeniable and thrilling. More so? Their story doesn't feel forced and thus, can be promoted to any viewership without it coming across as preachy and condescending, or having an agenda. If anything, Mafin is by far the best developed, healthiest relationship on the show. I, for one, much prefer the portrayal of good communication, heartfelt romance and overcoming obstacles together than a deluge of r-rated scenes. And honestly? We are being offered a damn good story here, even as it fails to satisfy everyone's hopes and demands (which in all honesty, it never could - at the end of the day, someone will always be disappointed)

I'm also reminded of Marta B. mentioning in a recent interview that the show is not aimed exclusively at the sapphic community. As such, it will not depict or cater to its particular needs. It's part of a larger ensemble and needs to appeal to a broad audience. And, when all is said and done, it actually manages to accomplish more with this kind of storytelling: one that's simpler, one that doesn't try to be pedantic. Ergo, they will not linger and preach to the audience. What they will do instead is allow the characters, their circumstances and actions, to speak for themselves. And they will trust they're doing a good enough job to let people draw their own conclusions. So far, I think they've achieved that: there’s heterosexual people watching the novela who love Mafin and think they’re the best couple on the show, there’s elderly people learning to be more open-minded, everyone loves Damian's character development, everyone hates Santiago and acknowledges he is a despicable lowlife etc. The show is moving the pieces along the board quite deftly and it makes for an interesting, if not always gratifying, game.

As for today's episode? There's no doubt that Marta and Fina only have eyes for each other. They're an established couple who will face anything thrown their way as they always have, as one. No mustachioed men will ever change that. Marta and Fina's narrative will never be whether they desperately adore each other. That they do couldn’t be more obvious. Their story? Ever has it been, and will continue to be, about their fight to attain freedom: freedom to live their love in a society that forbids it.

Therefore, I've reached the point where I'm not worried at all about either Santiago or Pelayo. Based on Pelayo's reaction upon learning Marta is a lesbian? I doubt he'll help Santiago in his attempt to sink Marta's ships. To me he comes across as a calculated businessman, but not a heartless one. He stands to profit more from a partnership with the de la Reina family than throwing Marta to the wolves. He also didn't bat an eye at Santiago's reveal, wasn't surprised or outraged. Which, I'll go out on a limb and say, is telling. He's either gay himself or simply plans on advancing his business / political career by securing a partner that won't demand his attention or affection. The first scenario ensures he remains socially upstanding while the second allows him to live as he pleases. To a man like Pelayo? It's a jackpot either way. Hopefully, the benefits outweigh the costs for Marta as well, should the plot move in that direction. And given all the signs? It's already halfway there.

That being said. It remains to be seen what happens to Santiago. I assume, and hope, his little ploy at denouncing Marta to the Civil Guard will cost him, dearly or otherwise. His own thirst for vengeance pushed him to make the wrong move which is, in my opinion, seeking out Pelayo. And while there's plenty of outraged cries that Marta & Fina don't need another man to save them? Let's not forget it's 1958. The likelihood of neither of them attracting a suitor, fake or otherwise unwelcome, is as doubtful as improbable. The fact they managed to successfully evade them so far? Quite the feat.

As for what awaits? Marta won't go to jail, I think, since that card has already been played. Or who knows? We might be surprised. The fear they need to instill in her requires new heights, in order for Marta to reluctantly accept another cage. Mind you, she's still trapped: as much freedom as she currently wields, Marta remains a woman whose very social status entraps her, singling her out as prime real estate. She's the proverbial golden goose, especially as dictated by the mores of society back then. Marta and Fina's shared dream of freedom remains, for now, a dream. One they've almost had at their fingertips, which makes their current circumstances all the more painful. I will say: it stings that Fina won't be the first to read Marta's journal. Undoubtedly, at some point, she will. After all, that journal is a mirror of Marta's very heart. It lays out her deepest fears, her innermost longings. It chronicles the fiercest battles Marta has had to wage with herself, her losses and triumphs, her meditations and hymns, the anguish and the deliverance of her love for Fina. To have it fall into the wrong hands? A violation of the utmost personal, a desecration of what is deemed sacred and untouchable. The diary symbolizes Marta having a safe space to call her own, one where she was allowed to embrace her true self, one that initiated her journey to freedom, her quest to rid herself of her shackles. Santiago has no honorable bone in his body and his hatred towards women, and Marta in particular, drives him to invade and vandalize her privacy, this blessed sanctuary she got to call her own. Let's see if Pelayo rises to the occasion and proves himself as a noble character. You can never have too many allies. Do I still take issue with how certain things are handled, with the inconsistencies and shoddy character work? Definitely. But I’m also able to simply sit back and enjoy. Let's see where all this goeth, shall we? Hello pain, let's go again.

[yuzuvrse]

Can we have some of ur mouthwashing headcanons for the tulpar crew? (Can be about anything btw) The brain worms are getting hungry again I fear… 😞

-ig ill be 🪷 anon if it’s not taken yet?

HELLOOO BABYYYY sorry this took so long i was dying bc of my finals </3 but anyways welcome 🪷 anon to the family!!!!!! these hcs ended up so unserious LOL

the crew got banned from playing uno after anya nearly flipped the table when daisuke put down like five +4 cards in a row now they just stick to sorry!

swansea hums to himself when he's working, it's usually like old songs but recently daisuke's pop songs have been getting stuck in his head. (i think it would be unbelievably funny if swansea starts singing like the brainrot versions of songs js bc daisuke keeps playing them. yk like the 'oh the weather outside is rizzy, and the fire is so skibidi' LMAOSKJDSK

daisuke doesn't really have a specific music taste, he listens to a mix of everything. doesn't know how to answer when people ask him what his fave genre is so he tries to act cool and says he only listens to rap music.

anya had a wattpad phase. i can't explain further i can just FEEL it.

curly is actually a decent dancer. his mom sent him for dance classes as a kid and he has a good sense of rhythm. jimmy makes fun of him for this though so he doesn't ever mention it.

jimmy has rewatched american psycho probably more than 117 times. he watches it and he's like:

(i am currently watching + reading it for the first time and patrick bateman is literally jimmy to me.) more content utc!

anya is terrible in the kitchen. like seriously do Not let her in there or the house will burn down just from her boiling water or smth. it's okay tho i will be her housewife <3 (i can't cook either) she is also very good at tetris for some reason. she's a little forgetful so she usually writes things that she needs to remember on the back of her hands but by the end of the day they're all smudged smh. but also she always has perfect nails!

curly is one of those guys who's just naturally good at things. yk when people are like 'oh yeah i never practice' and it pisses you off? he's one of those guys. ik ppl say he's british but he's so american to me??? he was definitely the jock in highschool that every girl crushed on but he never even realised.

swansea is a dog person. he's chill w cats but he definitely prefers dogs. he likes how loyal they are, and i can see him having a massive dog like a st bernard at home waiting for him. but if his kids ever brought back a kitten or smth he'd be the one to be all 'you guys better take care of it bc i won't' but then you see him becoming besties with the cat LOL.

daisuke LOVES the beach. literally a water baby. he's very good at surfing, and always ends up with a tan that makes him look even more handsome bc it compliments his dyed hair so nicely. i think that he grew up in a big family w lots of cousins around where he would be one of the older kids, so he's very good w children as well. he somehow knows the best way to entertain them and keep them out of trouble. (primary school art teacher daisuke are you guys seeing my vision?!?!?!)

jimmy gets nightmares and thus has difficulty sleeping. he lies whenever curly asks him about it but those dark circles say otherwise. this might be random but i also think he's good at singing. in another world he could have been a sleazy rockstar but instead he went to space. are u guys seeing the visual of jimmy laying back in bed strumming his banged-up electric guitar... i hate this mf.

anyways that's all for now! i had a lot of fun w these hehe <3 hope you liked them!

[genderqueerdykes]

everyone else is throwing in their two cents so here i go too i guess. trans masculine who had to go offline for a while twice because of a trans woman in my life stalking me and showing up wherever i went. do i hate and fear all trans women now? no, that would be fucking dumb. tbh i don't even hate the woman who was making me so afraid then either. i honestly just feel bad for her, i know she was in a super bad place mentally and honestly she was just very emotionally immature and socially awkward. i don't think she even fully understood that she was doing something wrong. i have faith she has grown since then and will do better in her life as she learns and ages, we were pretty young [19 years old, lol]. the bottom line is all kinds of people will hurt each other for all kinds of different reasons. no one group is a monolith that acts the same. i've had multiple trans women stick up for me and protect me in other situations, and i've done the same for them. sucks to be anon but i could never let the actions of a few shitty people destroy my love for all my sisters.

people stalk for a variety of reasons and a lot of the time people who are doing it don't realize it or don't call it that, themselves. it's good that you're able to offer sympathy even though it was dangerous for you. most of the people i've been hurt by in life have also been mentally ill so i try to give credit where credit is due and not blame them for things that they were genuinely struggling with. it's not good to demonize someone. it doesn't help

[patchworkcuddlebug]

Humanity

[CW: Passive suicidal ideation.]

Being a person feels... heavy. Like I'm always full of something. It didn't have to be gross, but it usually was. Sometimes it was something with an easy word to it, like disdain or cowardice, but usually it was more vague. Some sort of congealed, disgusting mass that's been slowly accumulating for as long as I've been alive, weighing my guts down until I'm too stressed to eat and too tired to sleep.

I don't want to die. Death sounds too painful, and I'm scared of commitment. But, as I looked out into the bay, waiting for the traffic on the toll bridge to advance, I can't help but daydream. If I drove into the river, just by some freak accident out of my control, I... wouldn't do much to fight it. I would just let whatever happens happen as I sit still. Let this heaviness in my chest weigh me down and drown me.

My whole life was like that, really. Just moment after moment of letting things out of my control happen to me. My parents never really let me do much, either because we didn't have money, or they decided it wasn't right. I had to move out young after they died, and that didn't give me much of a choice in where to work and where to rent. I didn't even have a chance to think about what my major would've been.

Being a waitress meant doing what you're told when you're told, which table to go to and what to bring them, and what to clean. The work itself was fine, it's just... everything around it. The same awful people just as trapped here as I am, the same inconsiderate boss that barely pays me enough to buy vegetables, the same disgusting smell of fish and chips, all building up and coagulating little by little.

The only way I could get through an average work day was by shutting my brain off and just letting my body move on its own. The years I've worked there have just been the same fog of meaningless obedience. It's a sort of torture, suppressing your ego all just to become your work, for the sake of people you hate. Just feeling full and heavy and gross.

That's how I survived most of my life. Ever since I started school, I learned quick that you keep your head down and go with the flow. Don't be too loud, too big, too anything. Just look pretty and do what you're told without thinking too hard about what you're doing. Try not to feel too much.

Of course dying isn't that big of a deal. I don't feel like I was ever truly alive, ever something that could really be called a person.

Oh, I'm home.

God it's so cold out. It's like the wind is trying to bite me through my coat. I really wish our heating worked, but I've given up trying to fight for it a long time ago.

I can hear the music from here. I swear to fucking god if she's throwing another party I'm going to scream. She can't keep doing this, she really can't.

I fumble with my keys because it's too cold in the hallway, and I struggle with the lock because it hasn't been replaced in over a decade. This is the right key, and I keep trying to turn it, but it won't unlock and my fingers are starting to hurt.

Today needs to end. Please. I just need to stop, after everything, I just need things to stop and let me be still for a single fucking-

Finally.

I leave the door open for as little time as I can. I don't even take my coat off before I march into the living room. She's there, on the couch with more friends than I've ever met. They're all smiling, talking with each other, and having fun. They're smoking weed inside.

I need to stop looking at the one sitting on the arm of the couch, she's not important right now.

"Hey, what the fuck?!" I raise my voice to be heard over the music and drunken ramblings. "I told you that you can't keep doing this, I'M the one who gets in shit for this with the landlord!"

She looked around her, gauging her guests' reactions. She forces a timid smile. "Hey, you don't have to make a big deal out of this, alright? Nothing's gonna happen if nobody tells on us, so just relax." She turns away from me, back to the others. To the woman on the arm of the couch. My roommate falls into this sort of drunken fawning, trying to excuse my behaviour, but that woman on the arm of the couch doesn't join in with them exaggeratedly rolling their eyes or shooing me away.

"I'm not the bad guy here! You're the one who keeps...!" I wince, bringing a hand over my eyes as I recoil into the door frame. It's so loud. "Fuck it, I can't do this with you, I'm going to bed." I turn and leave and slam my door and lock it. She turns the music back up. I'm ordering food and going to sleep.

After I stop crying.

. . . . .

"Do you like your life, darling?"

I'm floating. I'm naked. I can't tell where I am. I don't think I'm anywhere.

"...No."

The woman from earlier. I couldn't stop thinking about her all night. The way she looked, how she carried herself, it was just stuck in my brain.

She's so... big. She's towering over me. I'm like a toy, barely up to her shins.

This isn't a dream. She's there. I can feel her in front of me, almost more real than being awake. I've never been more lucid before.

"Such a poor thing..." She looks so sad. For me?

She's kneeling. "Let me take all that hurt away. I've always wanted nothing more than to help someone like you live the life they deserve." I should be scared. I shouldn't trust her. "I already know you'd make such a good doll~"

I look down at my body. It's fluctuating, moving in and out as I look at myself. My torso is flat and wooden like a marionette, but with each breath in it expands with cloth instead of skin. I can feel the seems of my stitches, the plastic of my joints, the clattering of my porcelain, all at once. It feels... welcome.

She's reaching for me. I know I should flinch, I should be scared of her crushing me as she wraps her hands around me like a doll, but I can't even remember what such a distrust would feel like. She's pulling me to eye level.

Why does her touch feel so... nice?

I feel a breach, like I've just come up for air. I can feel my soul hack and sputter, and finally begin to breathe. I've never felt so light, so emptied. Everything disgusting inside of myself was drained away. Have I been drowning all this time?

"Meet me whenever you're ready, darling." I know where she means. I see her manor, grand and sprawling, but tucked away just out of sight. I can see it so perfectly. "I'll be waiting for you there."

Her hands start to loosen, and I start to fall, further and further away from Miss.

I inhale sharply, way too deeply, as I wake up. It feels like I'm gasping for air. My whole body... hurts is the wrong word, there's a heavy rawness pulsating through me. It's not the heaviness normally in my chest. I'm in a puddle of sweat. I can feel my heartbeat behind my eyes.

My phone says it's 4:37 am. I don't care. I need to see her.

. . . . .

It's a blur. I'm on autopilot, too wired to think. This doesn't feel like before, this isn't the fog. This is pure intention.

I find myself in my car, driving to her. I know where to go, I know. I need to get there. I can't afford to waste any time.

I leave my car parked on a dirt road and wander into the forest just as the sun starts to rise. I didn't bother grabbing anything I didn't need to get here, and I left what i did grab in the car anyway. I didn't even take the keys out of the ignition. Whatever happens, I'm not coming back.

It's a few minutes of walking from the road to her manor. I have plenty of time to reconsider. It's not too late to go back. I'm afraid, of course. My self-preservation is trying to restrain me by my neck. But every time I think about giving into that fear, that complacency stopping me from stepping into the unknown, the idea of returning to what was... I keep walking. I couldn't explain why. Too much momentum, too heavy to bother stopping.

I'm here. Oh god, this is really happening. I lean against the house on an outstretched arm as I stare at the front door. It's thick and wooden, like something from a fairy tale. I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and raise a fist. She opens the door before I can knock.

This is really happening.

"Oh, I'm so happy you came, darling!" She quickly reaches an arm around me and ushers me through the door. "And so quick, too! I knew I made the right choice."

She sits me down on the couch and disappears just a room away. Before I can even admire the decor, she returns with two glasses, and a jug of iced tea. She sits down beside me, pours herself a glass, and sets the jug out of my reach.

She takes a swig of her drink, leaning back and swirling it in her cup. She stretches her arm across the back of the couch. I could cuddle up to her so easily, and I've never before felt this tempted to do that with someone. "Tell me what you know about dolls."

I feel something I've never felt before. Just a little, just enough.

"U-uh..." I try to gather everything I can. I don't know why I'm so caught off guard by the question, I came here for a reason. But saying it out loud, actually articulating these feelings, is something totally foreign.

"A doll is like a person, but... not." I take a deep breath. I feel like I'm standing in front of a stadium of thousands. "Witches use their magic to turn people into dolls so they can have servants. And... there are rules to being a doll, like how you have to call yourself an object, and do everything you're told."

I look at her for approval. She's waiting for me to continue. "Am I gonna be a doll?"

The witch almost... melts. She has such a kind, compassionate smile. She sets her drink down and turns her body to face me as much as she can. "Do you want to be a doll, darling?"

"I... I mean, I, uh..." I have never felt more like prey. Why is my face so warm? I'd do anything for her.

She reaches out and takes my hands, that I was holding up to my chest defensively. I leave them limp, just letting her grab them. I feel my shoulders start to lower just a little bit. She's so warm.

"Dolls are empty spaces shaped like people." She teaches me. "Dolls are objects that are obedient and docile. There's a special feeling they have called stillness, where your thoughts go away and you just feel happy." She starts to smile, a tender eagerness. "Can you feel it now?"

I feel it. I feel it. I feel it, I feel it. The stillness. She's making me still. It's gone. I don't feel heavy. I'm empty in such a wonderful way. I feel like I could float through the breeze for the rest of my life and be perfectly happy. Like I could do anything, and I would be happy. Is this what life was supposed to feel like? All this time?

"It's a big decision, darling." Her voice is so... magical. It's calming, it's exciting, it's everything to me. "This can only happen if you want it to. Think about your old life, everything you'll leave behind. This is your last chance."

I think about being a human. I think about everything that comes with being a human, the things I'll lose. My autonomy, my identity, things I was never granted in the first place. The privilege of destroying my self just a little every day, all to save myself the trouble of feeling. More than anything, that disgusting heavy feeling, the filth so deeply compacted inside me I thought it was inherent to being.

"Y... y-yes... yes, I want to be a doll!" I'm smiling so wide. Crying hasn't felt this good in a long, long time.

The witch smiles back at me. She pulls me into her, hugging me so tenderly. She's soft, and warm, and so many things.

"You're going to become such a good doll."

Good doll. I can finally feel good.

[cirusthecitrus]

Question 6 from the entrapdak question game? :))

Thank you for the ask! There are two terrible takes that to this day make me believe that some antis watched spop skipping every scene that had Hordak in it

Well, the first one is more of a crazy conspiracy theory, but I still wanna mention it - "Entrapdak is a pedo ship cause Entrapta was meant to be a teenager" and "her age was actually retconned so the writers could ship Entrapta with Hordak". I do wish that Entrapta's age was confirmed in the show itself, cause this aspect of her character did genuiely confused a lot of fans, but thinking that she was actually written as a minor but then was aged up just cause the writers wanted to make entrapdak less problematic?? Insane

The other take is "entrapdak bad because Hordak was manipulating Entrapta to work for him and was abusive towards her". And it used to be such a prevalent opinion in the main fandom too! I honestly think those people just hated Hordak sooo much (mainly for being a threat to Catra) that they were making shit up to make him even more evil and irredeemable so everyone would stop liking him or wishing him a happy ending. Many also loved Entrapta, but hated Hordak so much that they imagined he'd be a terrible partner to her and were insisting that she "deserved better" and was actually unhappy with him (some fake ass Entrapta fans imo) Like, lets dissect this take again. At first, as fellow Hordak fans always say, Hordak couldn't even manipulate himself out of a plastic bag. Plus there wasnt a single scene where Hordak manipulates Entrapta to do smth for him. It was Catra who made Entrapta side with the Horde and convinced her to work for them. Hordak didnt mind, but he also had no say in this. And when they became lab partners it was Entrapta who forced herself into Hordak's lab and in his life, she was the one always insisting on getting information and knowledge out of him, who insisted on working with him, bro just could not make her leave!

Many used to say Hordak was only using Entrapta for her skills (and also didnt care about her as a person, like hello?? have they seen s4 and 5?) when Hordak never made her do anything she wasnt intersted in - he didnt made Entrapta help him build the portal, she was already curious about portals! he didnt make her take care of him or build him a new set of armor, it was her gift! and he was never forcing Entrapta to stay by his side or be loyal to him or the Horde - she simply enjoyed working on this project and spending time with him. And when Hordak was told that she betrayed him he just... accepted it and never thought about revenge or punishment or anything like that. And he wasnt angry cause he lost a tool that could upgrade his tech or fix his problems, he was devastated because he lost his only friend. But you know who only saw Entrapta as a tool-

Then the abuse part - by that antis usually meant those two moments when he yelled at her/ cut her off while being in pain (and also brushed off Entrapta's hair). Like, yeah, Hordak has anger issues and he does scream a lot, and my boy should work on that, but such behaviour never made Entrapta feel distressed or afraid of him. She was either unbothered by Hordak's attempts at being scary and intimidating, or she was sad FOR him (and slightly dissapointed) - she never took his outbirsts as Hordak being genuinely mad at her, she knew smth was wrong with him, but it had nothing to do with her. He yells when he tries to imitate Prime and make ppl leave him alone, or when he's in so much pain he can't handle it and once again wants to be left alone (all because he himself doesnt feel safe around ppl T-T). Should he still apologize for snapping at Entrapta? Yeah. But is such behaviour abusive? I can be, but in case of Hordak? I dont think so

[blushingdread]

hii i read ur hero/opportunist fluff and it’s so good! how do u think hero falls for oppy? how do u think they’d work out as a duo

Hi hi! Thank you!!!

To me, Hero gets a crush on Oppy in the middle of the Molment of Clarity. Shit has seriously hit the fan, and every voice is at their worst except Oppy!! Boy steps the fuck up stopping fights, comforting the voices, and over all being a more gentle level head compared to Cold who is also trying his best but his one advice starts just making them upset. Like Oppy is still himself and has a list ranking them from best to worst bc this little weasel can't help himself, but he's genuinely looking out for their mental states. Hero in a Molment of Clarity sounds like Broken. The others still either mostly or half way sound like themselves except for Hero and it fucks me up. Cold takes over as the one that leads you, but Oppy felt like he took over Hero's role of cheering you on. Anways I started thinking about who Hero would cling onto for comfort, and Oppy was kinda the obvious one.

Sometime in one of the deeper loops where Hero spends the entire time wrapped in Oppy's arms as he stops the others from picking a fight with Skeptic again Hero thinks that he never wants Oppy to let go and he's like "Oh fuck I have a crush on him" but nothing comes of it at that time because frankly he's too depressed. (I imagine Opportunist with two sets of arms, so he gives very nice and comforting hugs)

Post getting all his memories back he remembers being gently held for a solid half of the horror of Clarity and he remembers his crush and brushes it off, he can remember all the dumbshit Oppy did like with Witch and trying to kill the decider and chalks it up to going though the worst experience of his existence making him crave comfort from anyone and puts it out of his mind. This seemingly works for a time until he catches himself thinking about how he wishes Oppy could of held him during Fury or looking back for fondly about how he acted during Wraith and man, the weasel is just complementing the stuff the voices accomplish/build while out on their own (I need them to all hang out post game, I'll cry if they don't) because he's a asskisser but Hero never thought to look at things that way, it's nice to have someone who always points out the roses and the brightside of everything. It's genuinely really nice, and he starts seeking him out, and he's fallen in love, great (Falling for the local weasel doesn't make Hero blind to his slime ball ass behavior. Oppy will be himself™ and Hero just sighs in defeat because, really?? Him????)

As for what I think them together would be like

At first, things would be rough. Oppy can barely express a genuine emotion to save his fucking life and Hero is well aware that Oppy can barely express a genuine emotion to save his life and has seen Oppy at his worst. So Hero hides his feelings as best he can because Oppy taking advantage of his feelings to get something would both be really shitty, but it would also retroactively ruin all the quiet moments they spent together in tMoC and rip the comfort those memories give him away, and Hero really REALLY doesn't want that. But he can't hide forever.

Eventually, Oppy figures him out and is ecstatic! Without TLQ or princesses around to bring them together, Oppy is very aware that all the voices at best dislike him and at worst hate his guts (none of them actually hate him, Oppy doesnt do good with social rejection and its a lot worse in his head), and finding out that not only one of them has a crush on him, but it's Hero?? The one everyone collectively likes and respects?? This is like Christmas to him. Then it's like cold water is dumped on his head as he immediately realizes this is what everyone hates him for, so he changes strategy. If he can be perfect for Hero, everyone will see how truly good and reliable he is, and he'll be allowed into the in-group, and they'll like him and he'll have someone by his side he can truly trust and— This, as you can imagine is a terribly unhealthy mindset to be in for a relationship, luckily Oppy is terrible at lying and hiding shit, so Hero figures him out like immediately. He told Oppy to stop trying to turn himself into someone that he thinks Hero would like because Hero already likes him, for himself.

This leads into a deeply awkward phase in their relationship where Oppy is trying his absolute hardest to be genuine with Hero, to let someone in, to make himself vulnerable, to try and form a genuine relationship. While Hero is excited that Oppy is actually trying, he's trying to also put his trust in Oppy despite seeing him at his absolute worst. In this stage, they just spend a lot of time hanging out and getting a feel for each other outside of high stress situation with an ever changing threat looming over them. It's nice. Oppy is still himself, and he's a shit sometimes, but when Hero hits him with a "Please don't do that, it makes me feel bad," he reels himself in. Hero helps Oppy get used to an environment where there's no need to try and get one over on people because their safe, and Oppy helps rebuild Hero's confidence and encourages him to be more firm with his actions. Hero never takes over TLQ body and is always taking his lead, I can imagine he isn't the best at doing things alone or being firm because he's so used to following.

They get together slowly, inching closer into eachothers lives, until eventually they're able to trust each other and then start dating. Friends to lovers slow burn, baby. Oppy helping Hero follow a project he was thinking of through, and then they start talking about how they feel about everything that's happened and at the same time they both realize they feel the most comfortable around eachother than anywhere else.

Finally, together, and my apologies for writing an essay, they're a very peppy couple that's always doing something?? Hero is always trying to make things better for everyone, and Oppy eventually starts having genuinely good ideas for that. They wake up and get ready together, make breakfast together, go outside to garden together, and talk to the voices to see if they need any help before either helping going off to do things™. Their always talking to each other, Hero lovingly laughing at Oppy while they go about being insane people who like having tasks to work on. (Does Oppy like manual labor? No. But he likes doing nothing less, and there's not much else to do so. Plus, it's downright nice when Hero is next to him, laughing at his jokes). Truest friends to lovers, they seem like bestie with gay tension until they kiss, and it's confirmed that the tension was because they are dating.

[radicalrascals]

Nick shakes his head slowly, the slight frown yielding a smile. "You don't have to tell me, because I know. You show me every day." He takes a deep breath, trying to replay the scene in his head. It doesn't make sense and yet it does. A little uncomfortably so, but eventually he chuckles, if purely to express his disbelief, not because the two people he loved acting like assholes was suddenly funny to him.

"I'm pretty sure Rafa didn't want you to defend yourself either." He quickly raises his hand as to stop Hari from adding his tuppence, because one thing Nick needs to make clear: "It wasn't fair. He has no right to test you. And while I think it's..." he swallows any and all negative adjectives that come to mind and just shakes his head for a place holder instead, "It probably made sense in Rafa's weird brain and he didn't mean ill, even if he was being exceptionally... provocative..." The last word is almost whispered. Realisation hits and Nick bites his lower lip, frown back in place. "I know you wanted to leave and I'm not going to stop you, if you still want to. But if you're still here when I get back, that'd be nice. I just need to...", he picks up his half-smoked rollie and wiggles it about, before he gets up and places a brief kiss on Hari's hair.

Outside, Rafael's fingernails dig into his palm but he keeps himself firmly locked in place, not giving into the desire to pace and throw his arms around in wild gestures while trying to explain himself. He has a thousand things on the tip of his tongue but he swallows them all, for they were knives rather than shields. Eventually he just settles on an almost too neutral elucidation for someone so clearly passionate and governed by emotions: "The question was if he would break Nico's heart, not if his wife would. And if someone would ask me if I would cheat on you and they would name all the women I'm friends with, my colleagues, everyone I ever dated and, yes, my ex-wife included, I would still say 'no, I would not cheat on you and I have no romantic feelings for any of these people mentioned.' This has never been an attack towards his ex-wife nor him having an ex-wife in the first place." And he looks the other way before he gives in to a 'but you keep making it into something I never said.'

Still he mutters: "And I don't hate him."

"Good. I would still love him if you did," Nick could see Rafa being taken aback by Nick's sudden appearance, so he uses the brief moment of his older brother trying to wrap his head around the new situation to walk up to him and wrap his arms around him: "Cê não precisa esconder que tá magoado."

"I'm not."

"Tisha, can you please punch my brother in the shoulder. I'd do it myself but I don't feel like driving anyone to the hospital tonight." He lets go of Rafael and lights his smoke and finally, finally gets to enjoy it. "You don't give people a chance to treat you right, Rafa, and you think I'm the same. But I actually say if something bothers me. And you know what? Hari listens. And he can accept a no. But you think you gotta save everyone and be a martyr in the process. That's hurting people too, you know?! And I bet Tisha and I could tell you for hours and days how wonderful Hari is, but I want you to go back inside and see for yourself. And this time, when you apologise, make it sound less estúpido, yeah? And can you also try to forgive him too? Tisha, did I forget something?"

“He was… he told me that if I broke your heart with anyone, my ex or whoever, there would be consequences.” Hari sighs. “And I told him that if he ever talked about the mother of my children that way again, I would punch him in the mouth.” He’s really not sure what sounds worse in hindsight, the threat or the defence. “In the moment, all I was thinking was… fuck this, she’s not here to defend herself, she’s engaged - fine, he hates me, but why is he dragging her through the mud too?” He explains, slow shake of his head like he’s chiding himself instead of relaying the information.

“I’ve always been better at defending other people than myself. But he wanted me to defend this, us, not… I could have handled it better, in a few ways. And I will apologize to him, when he and Tisha are done out there.” But something else sticks in his mind, something Nick said before he asked- “But you are the person I wanted to say all that to. About... what you mean to me. At least, the first person. It’s too important to say it in an argument, to prove something to your brother. I had to say it to you.”

Tisha chews on the inside of her cheek for a moment, trying to collect her thoughts. "No, you shouldn't have. You would have reacted just as badly if Hari brought up your ex wife, whether he was looking out for me or not. And I would be just as mad at him for implying that you'd break my heart by going back to her." Is what finally comes out, as if this reframing will make a difference. "And I would want you to defend her, if you felt her character was being questioned. Snowden… Nobody here is anybody’s first love. Singling out Hari for being divorced is hypocritical and you know that. His youngest is ten years old, his ex is going to be in his life for a while.”

I am not the first person you loved. You are not the first person I looked at with a mouthful of forevers. It’s not the time for poetry, but it flares into her mind anyway. “You two probably would have liked each other if you spent tonight getting to know each other instead of looking for reasons not to. And now Nick has to decide if he can be with someone that his big brother hates, and that fucking sucks."

[sihtryggr]

I love you my favourite problematic younger sisters <3

[klargreeves]

i‘m on tiktok now JUST SO YOU KNOW (you wanna follow me so baaad)