#they are idiots ur honor

[lunargeist]

scar: I’m feeling silly :D (so horny he might throw up) (grian tells him to stop describing it like that.)

Scar: Feeling Silly!~ ;3c

Grian: So, like-

S: Now

[mblue-art]

still you, always you. 💙💜

[piratefishmama]

Eddie would be that kid who buys a ton of those chocolates that look suspiciously like rocks just to fuck with people. it works really well for the most part, people are sufficiently peturbed by this guy who apparently eats rocks.

Only then he goes and breaks a tooth by accidentally chomping a real stone that he thought was one of the few he'd snuck into a planter at the mall.

[bones-of-a-rabbit]

Selkies are naturally quite cuddly, living in such cold climates and being social creatures and all,

so suddenly being on your own, even as a thing, a monster you don’t even recognize as yourself... it sucks!

The want to be held is still there, even if now you have scales and spines instead of fur and plush, heavy coat. At first you’re skittish, shrinking away from others’ touch, barely allowing Eclipse to apply bandages to the gouges and scars now decorating your ugly, foreign skin. You’re afraid, afraid of being hurt again and afraid of being seen as a beast, a blood thirsty monstrosity.

But over time the fear fades, shrinks a little. You’re nervous, anxious, and you feel so helpless and lonely... But with time, you start to feel a little safer- but only around one person. And you want him to know that you’re not scared of him anymore, that you trust him, but some part of you is still nervous.

But one quiet evening on the wide open sea, you can tell that your someone is lonely. You’re not good with words yet, can barely speak a handful of words in his language, but there is another way to communicate your thoughts, those strange and confusing feelings, to him, isn’t there?

[nonsafegay]

Rocket is in the “too old to stay up this late” age me thinks

[possessedbydevils]

Your honor, my client was not at the crime scene when the murder happened- what's that? You were right there when it happened? And there were witnesses as well? I see. Um, your honor, if you'll excuse me, l need to just- *throws myself out of a window*

[muirmarie]

Title: don't worry be happy

Fandom: Star Trek: The Original Series

Ship: Jim/Spock (extremely pre-mcspirk, but McCoy isn't in this)

Ratings/Warnings: M / no archive warnings

Word Count: 835 words - just a little ficlet

_____

This is a direct prequel to "don't you worry, babe (we'll figure it out)" (the spirk->mcspirk one where Spock & Kirk drag McCoy to their couple's counseling session), and this is very much not a standalone story, just a silly little ficlet. (AKA: You should read the other fic first.)

What do Jim and Spock talk about when they're having sex? They talk about their best friend, of course. You know, the way normal people do.

[milflewis]

Hi, I don't know if you're still accepting three sentence requests but Valewis and "it's always been you"... I'm so emotional about them rn

“For how long?”

Valtteri’s chest feels like it’s caving in and he presses a fist into his stomach.

Lewis shrugs, not looking at him as he unties the laces of his shoes. “I don’t know, man. Maybe, like, 2019?” He pauses, face scrunching. “Definitely before 2020 anyway.”

“Right. Okay, okay, okay.” He needs to sit down. He does. The room still seems to be spinning.

“Hey,” Lewis is saying, voice low and soft, and he’s looking at Valtteri now, one shoe off and one shoe on. “Are you alright?”

Valtteri swallows, hands flat on his legs, fingers digging into his race suit. “Yeah, yeah, uh, no? No, um, I just, this is all a bit of a shock?”

“Oh.” Lewis squints at him. “You mean you really didn’t know?”

“No!” Valtteri tries to breathe. “No,” he tries again, tasting each word. “No, I didn’t know you have been in love with me for years.”

“Oh,” Lewis says again, frowning. “Are you, uh, are you sure? ‘Cause, like, everyone knows? So i guess I just figured you did too and we just weren’t talking about it ‘cause we both knew and it wasn’t a thing ‘cause you knew that I knew that you didn’t love me back and it was all cool.”

Valtteri blinks. “I — you knew — what.”

Lewis exhales shakily, starting to look a little wide eyed, starting to look like how Valtteri feels. “Hey, I, uh, I really thought you knew, man. I swear to god I wasn’t lying to you, or, or, keeping secrets, or —“ His palms are spread, arms open.

Valtteri can’t think. That you didn’t love me back. What the fuck.

“It’s just,” Lewis is still going. “It’s just always been you, you know? And, like, I know I’m not very subtle and everyone knew so I — how did you not know?”

“I don’t know,” Valtteri says, sounding very far away. “The same way you didn’t know I loved you back, I guess.”

[riikaa-chan]

Chapters: 21/? Fandom: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 魔道祖师 | Módào Zǔshī (Cartoon) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji/Nie Mingjue Additional Tags: Angst, Slow Burn, Feelings Realization, Misunderstandings, Pining Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji, Hurt/Comfort, Retelling Summary:

In the aftermath of the Sunshot Campaign, Lan Wangji faces a three-year exile in Qinghe as punishment. Meanwhile, Nie Mingjue grapples with the specter of a looming Qi deviation.

Amidst the harsh winds of fate, their paths intertwine, unspoken emotions simmer beneath the surface, hidden by duty and tradition. But when a long-forgotten threat resurfaces, both men must confront their deepest secrets and desires, they must navigate the treacherous waters of love, risking everything for a chance at redemption and salvation.

[oathwilled]

❝ What’s wrong with this place? Why don’t they have one decent regular lock to pick. No, it’s got to be all magic and blowy lights. ❞ @evergloaming / dragon age 2

" Fuck if I know, " the half-elven mutters, dour, as they look around this intricate and magical place. It's beautiful, make no mistake — but with an absence of anything physical to fight, he's felt distinctly toothless since they've walked through the door. He's not entirely ignorant when it comes to magic — he knows a great deal more than he lets on — but he's no wizard, and he hasn't the slightest damned clue what half this is. " These bastards like their glowy shit, I guess. "

Moodily, he sticks a gloved finger in to interrupt the flow of glowing lights; it does nothing. " Maybe they left somethin' in one of those books —— " Those massive, chunky books, scattered with pieces of glass and mirrors on the table nearby — he gestures, vaguely, and as he does the gleaming light reflects in his chainmail, and there's a number of alarming chunk-clunk-clank sounds, and a bzzzt noise that sounds like an alarmingly angry wasp, and he snatches his hand back with a yelp and a shake and a curse vibrant enough to make a priest consider exorcism. " —— the son-of-a-fuckin'-fuck shocked me, shit! "

[playground-boys-phighting]

Would you ever throw it back?!

hell yeah!

Throw it back? What? BB what's that?

uhhh i dunno. I think it's a dance?

Pretty sure I can throw it back much cooler than you dude!

hah, you wish! i'm like, the king of throwing it back!

Nuh uh! I am!

uhm nuh uh you're not no proof no balls.

Well— WATCH THIS TRICK!

[dayjobs]

"lately, i've been hearing this... sound." - From Toki who's convinced her house is haunted 😔

* 𝒖𝒏𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅. ⸻ @un1awful accepting !

Sound.. ? Izzy stands quietly in place to keenly hone into her surroundings. She wasn't one to inflame the paranoia of another as she waved her hand at Toki with a laugh. " don't worry about it ! I'm sure it's nothing, there's no need to be scared ! right ?? " Firmly she stands with her hands on her hips, waist cocked to the side with an aura of fearless confidence.

Oh the joy of being Toki's personal knight - someone courageous - someone reliable - someone who flinches like a fool when she hears the scratching in the walls. " Huh ? ! I just heard scratching ! .. "

- and how easily that facade melts off her like a sticky sweat. Was there really a ghost ! ? How could there be a ghost ? !

Before she plans an escape another sound follows the scratches .. something.. familiar to her. Cautiously she approaches the wall to place her ear on the wall to verify, and then she leans down to open the floor vent. Shoving her hand inside she struggles for the length but eventually, she clasps on something. Lifting she holds out a kitten above her head triumphantly.

" AHA ! Here's your PROBLEM ! "

[dani-dear]

u know what would be a cute romance thing for a game like bg3/dragonage/whatever u try very hard to flirt with a character and that character doesn't rly think ur into them, ur just being nice, but they still have a crush on u. and u keep flirting with them and they're kinda in denial but still pining. then u finally have the dialogue option to either completely for realsies confess OR they very hesitantly say they have a crush on u.

[jonathanbyersphd]

Wedding AU Will, age 18: Mike will have a more fulfilling life without me so I need to break up with him so he can reach his full potential

Wedding AU Mike, six years later: Sleeping on a futon in his sister's guest room/dark room, barely has $3, writer's block like you wouldn't believe, hasn't had a decent night's sleep in YEARS, still very much in love with Will despite his best efforts

[edens-grdn]

A Compilation of My Autistic Headcanons

(Genshin Edition: Part One)

Il Dottore

50/50 on whether he's masking or not. He doesn't really have a reason to, but it's not really something he ever unlearned to do around others.

Low empathy

Kinda guy to hyperfixate on something so intensely he neglects everything else going on

Semi-verbal

Infodumps a lot. Pretty much every genuine convo he has with someone is just a huge infodump

Easily overstimulated by pretty much everything, especially social interactions

Very light sensitive

Gets aggravated when overstimulated

More shutdowns than meltdowns

One of the only reasons he tolerates Scaramouche hanging around is because it gives him more opportunities to infodump

Fairly monotone, and when he isn't he typically just comes off as irritated

Hates sarcasm with a passion but is incredibly sarcastic

Hates eye-contact, doesn't look at people when theyre talking

Hates being touched with a passion

Doesn't have a ton of visible stims

Fidgets with whatevers in his hand whenever he can

Messes with his hair a lot to stim (ex: running his hands through it, pulling at it, etc.)

Oral fixation, has shredded a multitude of pens with his teeth

Layers are a life saver frfr, weight is very grounding

Definitely took things apart as a kid so he could figure out how to put them back together

Major sweet tooth

Definitely had a hyperfixation on calligraphy at some point in time

Goes out of his way to avoid spending time around the others. They usually end up bothering him in his spare time anyways

Talks about marine life with Tartaglia, though he doesn't really have any strong interest in it

Very strong in his opinions

Doesn't stick to a specific routine, but gets annoyed when things change throughout the day

[dethharmonic]

CHAPTER FOUR, GIVE IT UP FOR CHAPTER FOUUUUR!!!!!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/39620982/chapters/106142037