#these memories are so important to me
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something something about mentors and cycles and mentors and cycles
#like#what if your memory became so intertwined with my ideals i could not help but to pass you on to those who look up to me#along with what makes my very heart beats and bleeds#(and realise i was so young#so young#and maybe i didn't deserve everything that happened then)#and maybe i could start forgiving myself for who i was then#because now i know i was just scared and alone and thinking i held the world on my shoulders#and now i just want to tell him#breath kid#breath#ace attorney#aa#ace attorney fanart#aa fanart#gyakuten saiban#gyakuten saiban fanart#mia fey#phoenix wright#apollo justice#charley the plant#polly the parrot#yes they're important characters and should be cited#dounart#fanart#art#the cycles and patterns woke me up at 4am once again and refused to let me rest
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i forgot to post this during june but i think one of the reasons qsmp was so important was how unapologetically Gay it was
for starters, the number of creators and admins involved who are irl queer of some variation, just chilling in a place where any kind of phobia would get Philza's legendary ban hammer faster than you could say "rainbow jelly"
and then the characters.
i remember showing up that first day and being shocked that somehow foolish had an ex-boyfriend already (I had missed the squidcraft lore apparently)
that server. gay. all the gay. all kinds of gay.
govermentally assigned platonic husbands that stayed together the whole time (despite one of them being gone for months at a time), not a chance in hell of infidelity. Proud fathers of two wonderful children.
governmentally assigned partners who yelled full volume at each other about cheating any time they were in the room together and between the two of them killed two children.
a grieving father and ex-convict becoming one of the most solid couples in the server, with a beautiful wedding and consistent public displays of affection via the in-game chat.
a demon ashamed of who she was and a lonely detective struggling with family trauma, now with a lil girl of their own, to love together and take care of, with more moms than could ever allow the little girl to ever be lonely herself.
a 2b2t warrior coming to terms with his sexuality with the support of his beautiful baby boy at his side, slowly but surely opening up to his eventual Brazilian Boyfriend. Where they went from the most cautious couple (baby steps) to the most sickeningly sweet couple on the server.
- and this list doesn't even scratch the surface.
gay characters, trans characters, ace characters, aroace characters, gender fluid characters, all kinds of relationships and families.
all presented without negativity or shame.
the point of the server was to exchange languages and cultures, without the biases and barriers seen so much in both the content creator scene and the wider world.
it also had a beautiful little side effect, practically by accident.
our lgbtqsmp.
#meant so fucking much to me#qsmp#qsmp pride#death duo#misclick duo#guapoduo#teaduo#hideduo#as a core memory i just remember how seriously cellbit took his characters relationship with roiers#it wasnt just a joke. it wasnt just a bit. he was writing a love story for his character that was meant to mean something.#maybe im too used to mainstream media treating queer relationships as less important. or never developing them as much as straight ones.#so this server full of the gayest lil cubitos around did a lil healing on my gay lil heart :)#qsmp lore#life's just a lil more bright with a lil bit of rainbow ya know?#lgbtqsmp#and then also tubbo having a lil vomit anytime hideduo looked at each other while fogetting how humans speak whenever fred looked at him#frubbo
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Alas, this beautiful dream could not last.
#dungeon meshi#falin touden#dungeon meshi spoilers#better drawn mdzs#(<- my higher effort art tag. I need to get a new one.) While it's different from my usual style I really loved how this came out!#Strolling back to the art scene to remind everyone I am still a lover of botanicals.#I had a blast with the symbolism for this one:#White lilium longiflorum (easter lily) for rebirth. Purple hyacinthus orientalis for sorrow and forgiveness.#Red spider lily (Lycoris radiata) for loss and death.#'Rebirth into something new' is so well done in Dungeon Meshi. She is back but she is not the same.#The last few episodes/chapters gives her this dreamy quality to her. As if she's not quite real. She's so perfect in their memories.#And as we know of dreams - no matter how sweet- they must end once we wake up.#It is so painful to lose someone twice. To see someone you loved in a dream and wake up and remember that loss again.#Dungeon Meshi being a grief allegory is important to me. I'll explain more as the story continues B'*)
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i honestly think part of the reason why my relationships always end horribly is because no amount of honey/baby/beautiful does ANYTHING for me but one time my friend told me i laugh like i'm getting paid for it and i've thought about that every single day of my life
#ramble#and the fact that i keep shacking up with absolute arseholes who refuse to have a single conversation but nvm that#idk i've just always been vaguely uncomfortable with lovey romantic things. they're not that important to me#i think they're a nice bonus on top of having a guy to hang out with who you just fucking LOVE being around#like i don't love someone because they kiss me and call me babe i love them because they're AWESOME and we share so many things#is this problematic. am i indeed the problem akdfhdfhd#i figured this out when i realised my best memories with my ex were when he was just being silly and not any of the pet names/affection#my ideal relationship is one where we're like best friends who also just kiss sometimes#and i think that's fine and i just haven't found a person i'm compatible with yet#i'm having a very oversharey week idk what's up with me
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I'm not sure if you're still accepting palette request but if you do: #6 "shy" for toon bendy (BATDR) or maybe #52 "plastic heart" for Twisted Alice?
an anxious demon and a murderous angel. what could go wrong?
batdr bendy with #6 - shy and twisted alice with #52 - plastic heart
#bendy and the ink machine#batim#bendy and the dark revival#batdr#bendy#alice angel#malice angel#doodle dump#dialogue dump#palette#yes the two links are to the same place. for continuity’s sake. it looks better this way okay#bendy outside the gent workshop w/ the signal towers struck me like a bolt of lightning. so glad i thought of it#tried to do the building from memory and had to redo it tho. i know it’s still not exact but the Vibes are what’s more important#had fun with malice’s hair! flaring out all fancy-like..
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"Yeah, but we talked about it and I didn’t want it." "Why not?" "Because it scared me."
#critical role#ygifs#cr3#fearne#she got me fucked up#her leaving her treasured cherished postcards at the altar of the raven queen where so many memories are left#leaving the one thing that had been her lifeline and her hope. the most important thing to her and she leaves them behind#because they weren't what she thought they were.#her innocence growing into sadness and that's the reason why she feared the dark versions of herself#because she was sad and angry and alone#this faun wearing her heart on her sleeve and running from what hurts her and it's just. ms johnson i'm#''do you think it’s the world changing you or do you think it’s you changing in the world?'' ''yes.'' girl i'm on my knees#I couldn't be more grateful fearne continued from exu this growth hurts so so so good I'd die for her#fearne angry? delicious. fearne sad? delicious. fearne tits? del-#fearne this episode you can really taste the If I'm Not Pleasing People It's My Fault When They Leave and it bit me
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just a reminder that one of neils favorite memories is when he found andrew cuddled up with their cats.
#the extra content will always be missed#it gave so much insight in their heads#I remember how nora also said that neil came to realize that andrew is more important than anything#like I knew that from the books already#bc boy was down bad#but it’s nice to have a confirmation#and when we talk about neils most precious memories#there is so much andrew in it#which makes me so happy#bc they found their happiness#neil is as down bad for soft andrew as us#aftg#neil josten#andrew minyard#andreil#nora sakavic
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is this anything . sky:cotl au
details (aka my rambling) under the cut
mostly set upon the whole idea that caine came from eden and tries to help everyone gain their wings (albeit doing a terrible job the entire time)
bubble keeps the name bubble!
they r a mantatee :3 suprisingly chaotic for a light creature and sort of has the "eat light and puff out candles" personality that caine should have but doesn't
i contemplated caine being called "the creature" just for shits and giggles (and eventually went with it) since im absolutely certain everyone who ever meets him ever would be terrified for a little bit until they realize hes sentient; he doesn't understand that the name is supposed to be sort of derogatory
caine is the only one with wings because hes the only one who can canonically fly/float!
(and yes his head is supposed to be a dark plant . i like to think im big brain for this)
the reason why his dark plant head is tinted red btw . my thought process was basically "ah yes. red = good bcus eden :]" even though thats convoluted since everyone hates eden but that makes it better in a way. i think
zooble > mismatched worksmith
"bows" given to them by ragatha as an identifier; not like theyd need one though ..
constantly making their own prosthetics due to growing boredom with their previous ones (autism™) and also carved the designs into their mask themself
kinger > reluctant royalty
same old kinger as usual .. when asked what he rules he doesnt particularly remember nor have an answer so hes usually treated with respect out of pity for being old and senile
second tallest behind jax , also the oldest (if you dont count caine i guess? whos sort of. ageless)
ragatha > plush friendfinder
matching bow with jax :3 sibling moment! (yes i like the ragatha + jax sibling dynamic . its amazing to me)
right eye does not glow and actually looks like a hollow hole if you get close enough to her face! also clothing making buddies with zooble :] she taught them how to sew without pricking themself
gangle > wrapped up theatre-goer (i had such a hard time thinking of a name .. and to be honest?? im not solid on this but WHAGEVER.)
shortest. obviously
likes to write plays in her spare time and reads them to zooble while they work
clothes are sectioned and Very flowy, and has a few (cracked and broken) masks she likes to use for play improv (and also uses for herself sometimes if she has a hard time expressing a certain emotion)
jax > towering tease (it sounds stupid but THIS is so fucking funny.i cannot resist this)
tallest OBVIOUSLY. like stupidly tall . has its advantages and disadvantages (like being able to steal things from gangle with no consequences . on the other hand. doorframes)
him being tall and having that be the only thing hes got going for him is absolutely hilarious to me and im leaning into that hard
he has a tail also, but its small and not visible from the chart
pomni > jittery jester (i had to look up "other words for anxious" for this.my intelligence is showing)
pretty much the only one i referenced real in game clothing for, which sort of fits! protag moment
this was all i really had, since other established things like their personalities and relationships arent really changed much. but this was fun to think about :3 input is appreciated !
#special thanks to twi for reminding me sky exists and therefore beamed this vision into my mind#im kind of obsessed#also speaking of which#be kind to me for this but if anything looks off or weird#its bcus i havent touched sky in like . literal months#so my memory of it is hazy HFJDJD#and yes im procrastinating on posting other stuff to post this . why do u ask#... ill get to it#eventually ..#the amazing digital circus#sky children of the light#sky cotl#um. lots of tags this time uh oh#tagging everyone bcus its important here we go#tadc gangle#tadc kinger#tadc zooble#tadc pomni#tadc caine#tadc bubble#tadc jax#tadc ragatha#there we go#tadc sky:cotl au
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isat pokemon au, my liege?
my rambling in tags
#my art#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#pokemon#siffrin#mirabelle#isabeau#odile#bonnie#i am not individually tagging pokemon sorry. floragato eevee ursaring scorbunny meowstic <- for anyone who does not know them#im personally a big fan of when artists mold pokemon designs like clay to fit their characters so i tried to channel that#siffrin really does have the perfect mystery dungeon backstory. washes up on a beach with no memories of their past type of deal yknow#i imagine that he was still a sprigatito then? and evolves at some point during their journey? dont ask me for details i dont know them#veryy tempting to make him an absol but ive already seen that done very well!! so i kept most of these to floragato sif#mirabelle being an eevee is suuuch low hanging fruit sorry. i could not resist the evolving pokemon not wanting to evolve trope#i was concerned that sif was no longer shortest party member until i realized they just stand on their back legs all the time to feel talle#when quadruped like mira he is still shortest. sorry siffrin#isa gave me such a hard time. like i never thought i would turn a character into ursaring of all things but it really was the best choice#my other choices were bewear or pawmot if you care. he’s so bear coded#if going purely based on looks i probably would have made odile a sneasler. but i wanted her to be psychic#ill be honest bonnie was purely vibes. they carry the treasure bag :)#never draw bonnie's hat in profile worst mistake of my life#loop is still cat shaped here but i’ve seen the idea of them changing species thrown around. much to think about#i like the idea of the party seeing sif and loop side by side and immediately clocking their entire deal#the change god is mew btw. very important information to no one but myself#eurasie as hisuian zoroark?? lots of hair. and the king can be darkrai#don’t mind the inconsistencies. me and my 2781 ways of drawing the same character#wait what does an eevee look like again. googles it. oh i really crabbed this one up#uhh. looks around. been sitting on this one for a bit too long i think. maybe ill clean up some more sketches later
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Revisiting the Drift -- This is a remake of my old piece from 2013! Happy Pacific Rim Day!
#Wild to think that today would have been the day some of the final events of the film take place...#I feel like I've improved so much in these 10+ years and I'm sooooo happy with how this came out#pacific rim#mako mori#Mako's memories have always stayed with me... she's so important to me <3 <3#meguart#pacrim
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something bad did indeed happen to that man. spent abt 25 minutes trying to find a better picture of that one (1) offical piece with his eyes open that wasnt compressed or tiny
#library of ruina#yan library of ruina#getting comfortable doodling some objects and mannequin shapes for very obvious reasons. i read the keypage story and now it has a grip on#my brain. wanting to go ahead and plan it out and then draw the mangled memory and nightmare that replays behind the eyelids in the darknes#it was cool to see the reason confirmed from my speculation. twas indeed another reason of blocking out present pain with closing of eyes#considering they made angela have a plot important reason for doing so it would only make sense for another to have a reason for it as well#well. after having a prominent part inside the thumb/index story line. its just going to be yapping about yan now i think#let me add a spoiler tag i suppose? vauge but just incase i dont want to be an asshole. even if most already have played rhe game#library of ruina spoilers#lor spoilers#i really liked the typewritter effect over the voice after distortion. especially so when the effect finishes before the actual garbled voi#does. it makes it feel as if it were being read out after it being written down rather than of own words or volition. along with the text#upon the screen during the fight being just prescripts rather than anything relating to the man himself like the other instances with such#text had been. paired w the name of distorted yan being untranslated to keep the intent of the name being unreadable or not understandable#more into the idea of stripping away of the self or any sense of a self. not personal and not even him anymore. the following of a goal for#the goal for it is given and there isnt any hope of having the ability to not do such a thing. people yearn for a reason and something to d#and for it to be given to them to not hold responsibility nor have to do their own choices anymore. once a crushing weight weighs down#inside the face of an absolute cruelty that is perpetuated and that crushed the dreams or even desires having them be but nothing how can#one move on? it was really nice to see at the end of the fight. its easier to just say such things than to actually do them. even if the ac#ions dont even feel as if they are ones own or that there isnt any say in the matter having to endure all the pain for seemingly nothing it#still is pain. that feeling inside is still real. it still happened. regardless of the circumstances that brought them about#the thumb/index or just fingers seem to be an exaggerated to the extreme showcase of how the colletivist mindset in an unhealthy manner#could be exhibited. the thumb with its hierarchy and absoluteness and the demand for respect along with its strict layers of showing who is#below and who is above. the ability to have power over those underneath . the participation inside of it and the already brought up yearnin#to be apart of a group and to have a title and position inside of a group and of power and even a desire like from pete to join one iirc#the index being of the cruel perpetuating cycle of pain people inflict upon one another a behavior beaten and upkept by the systems as they#drift and desire to live. which causes them to partcipate in that cycle out of necessity. cruel acts upon another in order to live and seei#a need to go ahead and do such things for if they dont they die and another will just do the same to them. social sciences talk and rolands#talks abt how the city opperates reinforce that fact. the index and prescripts are really just a show inside that extreme manner and in a#more literal sense of that. it was really cool to read it..
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#FK1stFMinBrazil
#firstkhaotung#firstkhao#first kanaphan#khaotung thanawat#excuse me for the overly long post#this is me fulfilling my self-indulgent needs bc i've been waiting for this for the longest time#i want to have this forever somewhere so i can keep looking at it#it was a very special night and it was so much fun#i want to go back to december 3rd it's a very important memory for me#bibi gifs
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Never seen it really discussed but despite his complaints about Pony Express, Jimmy is the only crew member to somewhat like being on the Tulpar.
Of course, the reason is sort of shallow, he likes being there due to the control he has in the cock pit as co-pilot. The fact that he’s actually in charge for once, even on such a minor scale. Everyone else has this open or held in contempt for physically being there but he likes it on a fundamental level, freaks out and lashes out on such a personal level when he realizes he’s losing the first job he’s probably enjoyed and that stability/control.
It’s not anything specific or I think polarizing about Jimmy but I feel like it adds to how he tells Curly this is home to him. Earth is objectively not a place of ease or comfort for Jimmy, but the Tulpar is. It’s a fucked up perversion of home and that’s so interesting for his character who also hates the corporate culture the most out of all of them.
#again the whole him adjusting well to the Tulpar from Curly’s words#talking about liking control in the cock pit the fond memories of karaoke#his debatable lack of care in actually getting them rescued like he doesn’t hate#being on the Tulpar he just hates that they aren’t solely in charge of it and by they I mean him and curly#and by him and curly I just mean him like idk I think he likes the micro biome it creates for them#too many social rules and standards on earth but here it’s so personal it’s by what the people set and he’s one of the most important people#position wise so he very much likes being there cause he’s a nobody on earth but not here#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#jimmy mouthwashing#his reasoning for liking being there is just as shallow as not liking being there#having to put in effort for work but less to be respected and socially responsible#cause at the party he still doesn’t know Anya is pregnant so that was all anger at curly and losing his job#which is harsh if we assume he hated the job he’d be like so what else can you get me to curly vs the lashing out#he both was mad at curly for gaining an opportunity to leave him but mad he’d lost the one place he’s not at the bottom
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Gotta include the whole family
#i forgot it was valentines day but wanted to do something for it so this is the fastest comic ive ever sketched#spy x family#yuri briar#loid forger#anya forger#fancomic#neapart#my best valentine memories were digging through those chalky candy hearts with my friends#and we would find the most misprinted ones and gift them to each other#so passive agressive conversation heart giving is v important to me and i think yuri is just petty enough to hunt a mean one down for loid#sxf
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It seems to be pretty well established that most fanfic authors don’t mind when readers leave comments on old fics and in fact welcome it. But what about authors replying to old comments?
Do readers care in general whether an author replies? Is it expected and seen as rude if they don’t? Is it nice when they do but not expected? Is there a time limit to the welcomeness of replies? Like is it nice if they respond within a few weeks but if it’s been months or years it feels awkward because you don’t remember the fic anymore? I’m curious!
#basically I have let my ao3 inbox accumulate like 1600 comments#and I am wondering what to do about it lol#historically I was very good about responding to comment bc it’s important to me that my readers feel appreciated#cause genuinely I’m so grateful that they took the time to read and especially to comment! most don’t so it means a lot when they do!#but then I went through a very long phase where I was too lazy/overwhelmed/tired to reply to comments#so I just stopped doing it except for occasionally when I had energy or when a comment was particularly detailed/heartfelt#I always felt bad about it and wanted to eventually catch up again#but now I’ve let it build so much that it’s overwhelming and it’s been so long that it’s awkward lol#and every reply would need to begin with an apology and explanation#but anyway. I was thinking I’d at least like to respond to comment on particular fics#or that are within a certain threshold of time#or that are more thoughtful#but idk#just curious what the vibe is#personally I don’t expect authors to respond to me but it always feels nice when they do#especially if it’s a comment I put a lot of thought/energy into#and I think I’d be pleased to hear back even if it had been years#I might feel a little awkward if I don’t remember the fic lol#but it also could be nice to jog my memory and go ah yes that was a nice time!#haha#anyway#mine#polls
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Day 122: HAPPY OUT OF TOUCH THURSDAY EVERYONE
Got the whole memory dance squad together ^^ (yes, these four are what I’ve been working on all week, sorry abt the shit background)
Plus, exciting bonus: the shop is now open! You can now get these four (and partriodge ranger) as stickers if you’d like! I’m gonna make sure to have at least one new out of touch character every out of touch Thursday bc;
1. there’s not enough yttd merch out there so I gotta contribute to society somehow and
2. I wanna make sure that everyone can have a lineup of all their favs ^^
Keep in mind that I’m not doing this for any real profit, I just wanna see people happy with the stuff I make; so please let me know if there’s anything you’d like me to make! Doesn’t have to be sticker, teki or out of touch Thursday related, any art request is fine! If you’d like me to make a proper shoplift shoplaugh shoplove Midori poster I can totally do stuff like that too :>
I’ll make sure to keep doing my dailies tho lmao, I just had a bunch of stuff on last week
+ a Teki-less dance squad if you’d like that for background reasons or anything :>
#sorry there’s so much text lmao I tried to shorten it as much as I could but it is. important to me#if you’d like alterations or existing art on other things lmk about that too ofc ^^#your turn to die#yttd#daily teki#out of touch thursday#sara chidouin#gin ibushi#kanna kizuchi#reko yabusame#teki tsutone#yttd memory dance girl#yttd daily#yttd dailies#teki yttd#yttd art#your turn to die art#yttd merch#yttd fanart
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